Original subtitles

Look at that. This just makes me wanna itch.

Why do you all have all that stuff in there?

Ugh.

Baby, what you watching?

The show about the pack rat people.

You know.

I really don't like this show.

Then turn it.

Curtis, what are you-- uh-uh, uh-uh!

Don't do that.

Don't do what?

You are so rude.

But you said you don't like the show.

I don't like it.

I just like watching it.

See, Curtis, why would somebody need 2,000 newspapers?

It says she got 75 cats.

Newspapers are her friends.

What she needs is about 100 cans of air freshener.

Hey, everybody.

Hey.

Hey, you.

Oh, we don't pound, baby.

What's up, Mr. C?

What's up, smooth?

Hold on.

Hey, come back here. - What's up?

Look at you.

Look at you.

Wah, wah, pop, pop.

Let me see you, let me see you.

What happened?

What, you rob a short and small?

Ha-ha!

Hater!

Now, mama bought me these new clothes.

You forget she was coming today?

Maybe.

Oh, come on.

I put a note on the refrigerator.

'Cause you be in the refrigerator a lot.

[laughter]

Hater!

And you wrote it in my TV Guide, and you taped it to my beer.

And you spelled it out on the counter with potato chips.

Which, if You must say so myself,

was both creative and delicious.

Yes.

Yeah, we know your mama's coming

That's all he talked about on the way here.

DeShawn, we know your mother is coming,

and we are glad about it.

And we're happy that you've been able to spend

so much time with her.

Yeah, Miss Ella.

She's been doing real good too.

Not like before.

I mean, she-- she-- she's got a job.

I know.

And an apartment.

And she's been taking all of her medicine.

I know. I know.

They told me that at the help center.

I mean, you guys might not have to take me in after all.

Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves.

No, let him get ahead of himself.

Curtis.

I can't wait for y'all to meet her.

And we can't wait to meet her either.

Go on, get you something to drink.

All righty, come on, Curtis.

I'm hungry.

Let's go.

Well, I better get going.

I got a big surprise planned for Janine.

Oh, that's nice.

That's real nice.

You're gonna ask me what it is?

What in the what?

Say what, baby?

Well, remember when we first got

married and I didn't have the money to buy a nice ring

so I bought that little rock?

Yes.

Yeah.

She took that little rock and multiplied it into many rocks.

Curtis.

I bought her a new ring.

Did she sell that too?

Why don't you just tell us, then?

I'm still trying to figure out what

happened to the second ring.

Let's see it.

Ta-da!

Wow!

That-- that is really something.

That is something, ain't it?

Yes, it is!

That is really something.

OK, OK.

Well, listen, I gotta go, 'cause I gotta get this to Janine.

Yeah, you need to.

OK, you get that to Janine.

All right.

See you.

Wow!

You going to hell.

- What are you talking about? - You going to hell.

Why?

Why you ain't tell the truth about that funky, ugly ring?

Curtis, I did.

No, you didn't.

You said "it's something."

And eve--

"It's really, really something."

I did.

And everybody knows that that is short for "ugly."

Now, that's some bull--

Curtis, uh-huh.

That's some bull.

Curtis, let me tell you something.

No, no.

Miss Ella, Miss Ella.

Should I tuck this in or not?

Oh, please, always, tuck it in, baby.

All the way around.

Uh-huh.

Boy, I ain't seen you this excited since Lil Wayne got out

of jail.

Oh, right.

Now, that was a good day.

Man.

But I just want y'all to like her, you know?

I mean, she's sweet, really funny.

She can cook. She can cook real well.

She cooks?

Wait, cook better than me?

Oh, baby, can't nobody cook better than you.

My mama can.

[doorbell rings]

Ooh!

Hey, hey, hey, what you doing?

Don't be answering the door like you live here.

Sit down.

Hey, you remember that when you want a cheeseburger

and your mama not here.

Here we go.

Mama!

Baby!

Aw!

Aw.

Ma, this is Mr. Curtis And Miss Ella.

Hello, I'm Kathleen.

Good to meet you, Kathleen.

Oh, you all are just like DeShawn described.

Did he tell you I was suave and debonair, like the Billy

Dee type?

That's how it is.

But I'm glad to meet you, Mr. Payne.

It's good to meet you too.

And Miss Ella.

You're even more beautiful than I imagined.

- And you are too. - Thank you.

Thank you.

I've brought gifts.

Oh, Kathleen, no, you did not have to bring gifts.

Yeah, you should have.

You've been looking after my baby.

I had to show my appreciation.

Well, your kind words are enough.

like my kind words.

I like gifts.

Get your hands off.

What?

She said they for us.

I got you a hat.

Oh!

Look!

It got "Atlanta" on it!

Yes.

You got me a with "Atlanta" on it!

Of all the hats you could have got,

you got me one with "Atlanta" spelled right on it!

Who'da thunk?

Baby, does she know I live in Atlanta?

And for the lady of the house.

It better not have "Atlanta" on it.

An apron!

I needed a new one.

With "Atlanta" on it!

Curtis, I don't have one with "Atlanta" on it.

Yeah, but now you do!

Look at that.

Does she know you live in Atlanta?

DeShawn.

Another gift?

Yes, for the best son in the world.

If we only had one more piece with "Atlanta" on it.

And it got "Atlanta" on it!

Thank you.

Isn't all this new stuff expensive?

No I get a heavy discount at work.

Where you work?

At a souvenir shop?

Kathleen, have a seat, please.

So how are you liking the new job?

I'm tired, but I'm not complaining.

Don't.

It's such a blessing to work.

Yes, it is.

Yes, it is.

Well, DeShawn, you ready?

Ready.

Wait, wait, wait.

Ready?

I thought you were gonna at least stay and visit a while.

Well, this boy can't wait to go paint balling.

He likes to get there before the good guns are gone.

That's it.

Train up a child, and when he gets old,

he will shoot straight.

Curtis!

He can aim. What does the Word say?

"Aim straight?"

I'll tell you later.

Kathleen, oh, do you have a cell phone number or a way

I can reach you any way?

No, not yet.

I'm getting one next week.

OK, all right.

Well, how about this.

Can you come back for dinner at 8:00?

Sounds good.

After pelting the enemy lines with blue paint,

should work up a big appetite.

come on, son.

Good to meet you.

And bring some more gifts!

Can't never get too much "Atlanta!"

Baby!

Shh!

I just put the twins to sleep.

I got a surprise for you.

What kind of surprise?

You got me a new car?

You got me a new car!

Oh my gosh.

I didn't get a car.

you got me all excited for--

is it a fur coat?

Huh?

Fur coat?

No.

OK, am I pregnant?

No, are you?

No.

What is it?

Well, remember when we first got married?

Which time?

Well, the first time we were really young,

and we didn't have any money.

Yeah, the mice had more cheese than we did.

And the second time, it was spur of the moment,

and you know, the twins came unexpectedly.

Yes, that was a crazy, crazy day.

And I wanted to get you a nicer ring.

Oh my gosh.

CJ, you got me a bigger ring!

Oh my gosh!

I was thinking about that, but I didn't wanna say anything!

Bam, look at that!

Look at that.

How you like me now?

Wow.

Wow.

That's something.

That is something special.

Absolutely.

Um.

Now, come on now. Try it on.

Try it on.

Let me see how that thing look on you.

Baby, I would love to, but I just ate a bunch of salt

today, so my fingers are kind of swollen already.

I should be able to tomorrow. - No, come on now.

You're gonna make me think you don't like this ring.

Hold this carefully.

There you go.

Oh, you can't.

It-- it-- it doesn't fit.

It'll fit.

No, I won't.

It's-- it's a--

- Look at that. - Ah.

Right on there.

Perfect.

Good, good.

I mean, that-- that looks perfect on you, huh?

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Baby, isn't this kind of expensive?

Can we afford this?

Hey, I am the new fire commissioner, baby.

I am balling.

You didn't have to do this.

You deserve that.

It's very sweet and everything,

baby, but-- but see, this-- this ring.

That ring, do you like it?

Words cannot express the way I feel.

Give me some.

Give me some!

But you know what, Curtis?

She does actually look really good to me, though.

Compared to what?

Oh, you.

Well, actually, these rolls look really good.

Didn't I tell you--

Stop, stop!

Would you stop?

[doorbell rings]

You like that, don't you?

Yeah.

Oh, yes.

Come on in.

Hi, you.

Kathleen, I forgot to ask you if you eat pork.

I hope you eat pork.

I gotta go.

Well, we have chicken.

It's time for my bath.

Excuse me.

Yeah, you know, you can get pretty dirty

running around over there.

Did you guys enjoy your paint balling?

What you trying to say?

I'm trying to say, you get pretty dirty running around

over there.

Did you enjoy your paint balling?

He just wants to know if we had fun, ma.

And Mr C., we had a lot of fun.

I mean, my mama, she kept running up to people

and was like, "break yourself, fool!"

Remember that, Mama?

Remember?

Break yourself!

What's wrong, Kathleen?

Are you all right?

Are you tired?

Stop staring at me!

I didn't come anywhere near your stuff!

Come on, DeShawn.

But Ma, Miss Ella made us dinner.

I don't care!

DeShawn, let's go.

Now!

Ha.

Ah, she's cool, you know.

She's not always like that.

Um, she's just had a kind of long day, you know.

I've had plenty of long days.

I ain't never--

Curtis.

OK, well, I better get going.

Wait, wait, wait, where, where, where, where, where?

I'm spending the night with my mama.

Nah, I don't think that's a good idea, son.

I don't feel comfortable sending you

over there with her right now.

Yeah, me either.

No, she's cool.

I mean, come on, Mr. C. You know how women get

all riled up and wanna fight.

Look, I think your mother needs some time to herself

tonight.

Maybe we should just take you back

to the group home for tonight.

Yes.

But this was the weekend I got to spend with my mom.

I know.

DeShawn, I know that, but we're just trying to look out

for your best interests, baby.

OK, well, I'm gonna be out.

Hey, hey, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Come back here.

Ella's talking to you.

I mean, you all are chill.

I know my mama.

Everybody always on her back all the freaking time.

Well, maybe that is the case, but sometimes--

But nothing, all right?

That's my mama, and y'all are trying to judge her.

Man, maybe she'll be all right if people like

y'all left her the hell alone.

OK, hold on.

First of all, you don't talk like that in this house.

That's the first thing.

OK, I'm sorry, Mr. C. Can I at least just go say goodbye?

Yeah, you can say goodbye to her,

but you come right back here.

OK.

Please, he's coming back.

He's not coming.

Baby, he coming back. OK?

I told him to come back, and he coming back.

He know I wasn't playing. - OK.

We got a relationship.

I told him to come back. He coming back.

OK.

Where is he right now?

[car drives off]

Turning the corner.

[doorbell rings]

What the hell's doing on around here?

[chattering]

Ma, ma.

Mm-mm.

Come on, please stop.

Oh no.

I'm not leaving.

I'm not leaving until they stop that signal.

Ma, there is no signal.

You're just tired.

I can hear it, boy!

I can hear it!

DeShawn, you OK?

Everything's fine.

She's just tired.

Ma, let's go back home and get some rest.

Stop lying on me, boy.

You know damn well these highfalutin

folk owe me an apology.

Kathleen, we're sorry.

Come on, have a seat.

No!

OK, look, Kathleen, if you'll just calm down,

and we could talk about this when the sun come up.

No, because the sun tells lies about me too.

You keep sending radio signals to the fillings in my teeth,

and I want you to stop!

Ma, there are no radio signals.

You're just tired.

I knew it.

I knew you'd side with them.

He's not siding with anybody, Kathleen.

[snickering]

OK.

There's nothing wrong with me.

No.

Nothing wrong with me.

No, there isn't.

Just have a seat, baby.

Let me get you some water.

[screaming]

Stop!

Stop!

Baby, call 911. OK.

No more signal.

DeShawn, go in the back and get a blanket.

It's OK, baby.

It's OK.

Hey, baby.

Hey.

Hey, hey.

Hey, girl.

Wait now.

There is nothing sexier than a man washing dishes.

Yeah, and when I get done with this, I'm gonna wax that--

- Stop! - No, floor.

- Floor? - I was gonna say "floor."

You were gonna say "floor?"

Yes, get your mind out the gutter, girl.

What's wrong with you?

I'll have let you have that one,

but I need to talk to you about something.

Yeah, but first let me kiss the hand of the prettiest lady.

What is that?

My ring.

What to the ring I gave you?

I took it back.

Why?

Damn, Janine!

If you didn't like it, all you had to do was say so!

I'll never take back nothing you give me!

That's because you like everything I give you, CJ.

Listen, the reason I took it back--

You think I like everything you give?

Yes. I'm a good--

- Is that what you think? - I'm a good gift-giver.

Oh, OK, let me show you something.

See this right here? JANINE: Yeah.

You think I like that?

I gave it to you because you're a firefighter.

What the hell is that?

It's a poodle.

A poodle, exactly!

I'm a fireman.

Our mascot is a Dalmatian.

Hence the name "Spot."

With no damn spots on it!

You think liked that.

Let me tell you something, is that thing was real,

I'd have it put down.

Let me tell you what else I hated.

Let me show you something.

I hate this!

This I hate.

What's wrong with that?

Have you ever seen me ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,

ever, seen me use a shoehorn?

No.

That' 'cause I hate it.

But I thought it was because you didn't have one.

If you had one, maybe you'd use it.

Why do I need something I don't use?

Hold on, let me show you what else I hate.

There's more?

Oh, I really hate this.

Bam!

I love that hat!

Then you should wear it.

This hat is stylish.

If you're a mortician in Detroit.

Oh, so I don't always like everything you get me, but OK.

Listen, I think you're overreacting.

Overreacting?

Yes, just a wee little bit.

You are an awful gift-giver!

Awful!

Yes, but I kept it because you gave it to me.

OK, well, if you felt that way,

why didn't you say anything when I was giving them to you?

I'm saying it to you now.

Maybe I should just take 'em back,

like you took back my ring.

OK, wait, wait, wait.

I didn't take back the ring because I didn't like it.

So why'd you take it back, then?

I took it back because when you gave me this ring,

you were giving us a second chance.

This ring means the world to me.

I will never, ever take it off.

Never take it off, huh?

Never ever.

Ever, ever, ever?

And then some.

So why didn't you say that in the first place?

Well, I tried, but then you started throwing poodles

and hats and stuff at me.

Don't forget about shoehorns.

I'm sorry.

I should have told you I wanted to take the ring back.

It's all right.

I think I know what we can do with that money.

Cool.

And when I told you I was gonna wax the floor--

I'll let you get to it. I'm sorry.

No, I was gonna wax something else.

I you were gonna say that.

Wax that floor!

Thank you, guys, really, but my mom is fine, you know.

It's just that everyone keeps pressuring her.

DeShawn.

No, seriously.

Because when I was little, you know, this one--

DeShawn.

No, really.

Because I told her my mom was fine.

DeShawn, have a seat.

OK, baby, your mother is not fine.

Your mama is sick.

But she's not crazy.

Calm down.

Nobody said she was crazy.

But she is ill.

Right, she has a mental illness.

But the hospital's gonna help her straighten that out.

She should get better.

I hope so.

So why don't you go get some rest?

I don't feel like going back to the group home just yet.

Well, I think Ella wants you to stay here.

Is that true, Miss Ella?

I sure hope so, since we going to be your new foster parents.

So you're gonna be my mom?

Well, no.

I'm gonna be the one taking care of you like a mother.

But Kathleen will always be your mother.

Hm?

And she can always come by and visit whenever she gets out.

And when she gets better, you guys can go paint balling.

You can go to the mall.

Slow up.

Let's not put a gun in the woman's hands so fast.

So why don't you go and wash up?

We've been at the hospital all night.

And I'll make up something to eat.

Yes, ma'am.

Yes, sir.

Wet willy.

The year before that, and the year before that, and the year

before that.

You are the worst gift-giver in the history of gift-giving.

You can stop rubbing it in.

But you did the right thing by taking the ring back.

Thank you.

Instead of wasting money on things that neither one of us

want, we made a good compromise.

And now, instead of getting things we don't want,

the whole family can enjoy a vacation in Jamaica.

We'll have a good time, you know.

Everyday rest back, feeling irie.

Irie, yes!

Oh, wait, wait, wait.

Now, does this mean you won't be buying me any more jewelry?

Uh, no.

Never.

No jewelry for you.

CJ, wait.

Now, OK, listen, baby.

Diamonds are still good.

You just need to let me be there with you when you pick 'em out.

No trinkets.

Baby, please.

Never, no trinkets.

Stop talking like that.

We're not in Jamaica yet.

[theme music]