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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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Yikes!
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Courthouse cafeteria lobster roll?
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20 bucks says you can't
keep that down for two hours.
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You're talking to a woman who
once ate calamari in The Hole.
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Oh. You know, we get
it. You were in prison.
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The Hole is what I
call the state of Ohio.
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The water in the water
fountain is carbonated again.
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Can't tell if it's concerning or fancy.
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00:00:28,821 --> 00:00:31,906
Well, it depends. Do you
consider tetanus fancy?
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00:00:31,907 --> 00:00:34,728
So, my favorite law professor e-mailed,
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and she needs a speaker
for a lecture next week.
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- Do you want to do it?
- Abby, you know I only
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ever leave the city for
farm-to-table dining, hm?
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- I was asking Julianne.
- And I was saying yes.
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Aww!
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Why would I ask you,
Dan? You'll just say no.
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That's even more hurtful.
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You know how much I
love saying no to things.
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I do. You're the only
person I've seen giddy
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from rejecting a
computer software update.
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Oh, Dan. Always the
duck-duck, never the goose.
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You can't blame her.
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I mean, she did
choose the better lawyer.
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Uh... You
think you're the better lawyer?
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The only way I would believe
that is if I argued it in court,
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and I wouldn't argue it
because I'm the better lawyer.
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Do you see the conundrum we have here?
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You sound crazy.
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You know, and that's coming from someone
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who spent six months in a group home.
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The group was the Bee
Gees. And I dated all three.
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So many teeth.
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I'll tell you what. You pick
any case on the docket tonight,
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and I will beat the cashmere
blend pants off of ya.
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Hey, look! Look! There's Mr. Fielding!
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- Oh, God.
- Dan, do you know
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those two Great
Depression time travelers?
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Do not make eye contact.
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That's Bob and June Wheeler,
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the only living creatures I
know who can haunt a place.
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Mr. Fielding! Mr. Fielding!
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Oh, no, Dan.
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You might have to
defend us for that, too.
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I think we found our case.
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Oh, but you're such a good lawyer.
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I'm sure you'll be fine. Knock on wood.
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Don't let 'em knock on anything.
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- Synced and corrected by actumaxime -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
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Thanks again for showing
me to the cafeteria.
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I can't believe I almost ate
my sandwich in the morgue!
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They do look similar, but the people
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lying on the tables in
here are just super-drunk.
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Ohh! Cute and funny.
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I'm Crash, by the way.
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Crash. I like a one-syllable name.
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I'm Abby. That's two
syllables. So stupid.
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Well, here's two one-syllable words.
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Call me.
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Looks like that
industrial-strength deodorant
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is really payin' off.
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Abby, pull yourself together.
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People are trying to eavesdrop.
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That guy was super-hot.
Like "red eye" hot.
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00:03:03,392 --> 00:03:05,463
Like, I want to ride him for six hours
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and wake up in a different city.
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00:03:08,731 --> 00:03:10,940
Yeah, too bad there's
something wrong with him.
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00:03:10,941 --> 00:03:13,945
Is he the kayaker in
the herpes commercial?
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Man, you wish. A working actor would be
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an improvement over
the guys you've dated.
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00:03:18,324 --> 00:03:21,951
Since your breakup, it's
been a loser convention.
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00:03:21,952 --> 00:03:24,704
Remember the guy
who only wore terrycloth?
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I don't know. Must have been nice,
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always having a towel right there.
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Okay, so maybe my radar
has been a little off lately,
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but I have a feeling that Crash
is gonna break that streak.
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I mean, those teeth? No way
those come off when he sleeps.
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I bet he makes noises when he kisses.
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Myom-myom-myom!
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- Get used to that.
- Hm.
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The People vs. Bob and June Wheeler.
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Aww! The Wheelers! Welcome back!
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And may I remind everyone,
in case of an emergency,
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the exits are in the front
and the back of the courtroom.
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Sorry, Judge.
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00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:04,055
Trouble seems to find
us like we owe it money.
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00:04:04,057 --> 00:04:05,620
And we don't.
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00:04:05,621 --> 00:04:09,474
Unless "trouble" is what
they call the IRS these days.
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00:04:10,118 --> 00:04:12,699
The defendants are charged
with destruction of property
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after their chickens
burrowed out of their apartment
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and into a nearby massage parlor.
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00:04:18,634 --> 00:04:22,337
From what we hear, it
was not a happy ending.
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00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,662
My clients were nowhere near
the scene of the alleged crime,
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00:04:25,664 --> 00:04:27,304
and I don't think it's
necessary to go into detail
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- as to where they...
- It was date night.
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I took the missus to
her favorite restaurant...
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Trader Joe's free sample station.
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- Mmm!
- Mmm!
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It doesn't matter where they
were when the crime happened.
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They own the chickens
and are responsible
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for the damages to
their neighbor's business.
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00:04:46,245 --> 00:04:50,373
Oh, technically, uh,
they're not our neighbors,
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since we're squattin'.
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00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:59,099
Technically, you're not
charged with that, so shush!
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00:05:00,718 --> 00:05:02,385
You know what they say.
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Home is where the heart is.
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And in our case, the hearts are
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in the bathtub full of ice
until we can find a buyer.
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Permission to approach the bench.
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I would like to ask for a continuance
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so I can educate my clients
on their right to remain silent
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and to go pick up some duct
tape in order to enforce that right.
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00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:25,241
Well, Dan, I'm feeling generous,
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so I can offer you a plea deal.
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I mean, yeah, you'll
lose, but, honestly,
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I can't think of anybody
who could win this case.
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A good lawyer can win this case,
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regardless of what the evidence is
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or what the law clearly states or...
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which gods hate my clients.
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Hey. It's fine with me.
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Watching men struggle
is one of life's great joys.
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I'll allow it. I don't
understand it, but I love it.
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I'm excited but I'm
impartial, so I will allow it,
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which is all I will say, even
though I said much more.
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Court adjourned.
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Look, Judge. Your boyfriend is here.
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Oh.
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Why is he hugging the Wheelers?
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I mean, t... that doesn't mean anything.
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00:06:03,614 --> 00:06:05,370
I hug strangers all the time.
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00:06:05,372 --> 00:06:08,701
I hug the Domino's guy
when I'm really hungry.
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00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:13,247
Oh! That's what's wrong
with him. He's a Wheeler.
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It could be worse.
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Myom-myom-myom-myom!
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Never mind. That's as bad as it gets.
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00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:27,207
Okay. Look. I'm not gonna lie to you.
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They have a strong case against you,
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00:06:28,972 --> 00:06:32,626
especially given how much
you admit to all the charges.
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00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:35,888
As Dan's paralegal,
I'd like to go on record
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as saying you have excellent snacks.
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00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:41,359
- Murray.
- Hm?
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00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:42,777
- That's chicken feed.
- Are you sure?
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There's a chicken on the bag!
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00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:48,116
So Frosted Flakes are just for tigers?
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And you have to be
a sea captain to enjoy
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the mouth-cutting delight
that is Cap'n Crunch?
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You... You sound ridiculous, Dan!
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Can he be our lawyer?
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00:06:57,417 --> 00:07:00,771
Oh! You can't afford me.
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00:07:01,964 --> 00:07:03,637
Alright. Look. You're only guilty
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00:07:03,639 --> 00:07:06,300
if the prosecution can prove
that you own those chickens.
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00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:08,498
And I can win this if
you just don't admit
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00:07:08,500 --> 00:07:09,720
to owning those birds!
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00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:11,389
- But those are our bir...
- Stop!
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- We are the ow...
- Don't!
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We're the only parents they ever ha...
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Shoosh!
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As far as you're concerned,
those birds flew to the city
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to make it big on Broadway.
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00:07:21,984 --> 00:07:26,612
Oh, look! Santa's made it
to the Island of Misfit Toys.
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00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:28,531
Hey, Miss Julianne.
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Guess what we're not
supposed to say we own,
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- except that we do.
- You just... Would you...
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00:07:33,121 --> 00:07:34,810
Hey, Bob. Here. Here's a quarter.
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00:07:34,812 --> 00:07:36,483
Go buy a gumball or something else
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that'll fit perfectly in your esophagus.
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I have an esophagus, too, you know.
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00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:51,470
Dan, I'm gonna tell you the
same thing I told my shrink.
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You're wasting your time.
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And you are not gonna be happy
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when you see the surprise
I have in store for you.
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The joke's on you. I'm never happy.
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00:08:01,523 --> 00:08:03,781
Look. She must have a surprise witness.
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00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:05,990
- Find out who it is.
- Oh, I don't know, Dan.
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00:08:05,992 --> 00:08:07,361
She went to a lot of trouble.
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00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:10,216
Are you sure you want
to ruin the surprise?
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00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:15,411
Alright. Crash Wheeler pros and cons.
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00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:18,039
The pros are obvious. Cute. Sweet.
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Carries himself with the confidence
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00:08:19,632 --> 00:08:22,168
of a man with six to eight abs.
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00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:24,815
I don't know if this is a pro or con,
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00:08:24,817 --> 00:08:28,667
but his whole family is cursed.
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00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:31,677
Okay, but we don't
know that he's cursed.
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00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,763
He's not like them in other ways.
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00:08:33,764 --> 00:08:37,918
I mean, he looks like he's at
least aware of indoor plumbing.
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00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:40,811
There's only one way to find out.
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- Hey, Crash!
- Mnh! Inviting the curse over?
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What's the point of ranting
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00:08:44,650 --> 00:08:47,276
if you're just gonna do it anyway?
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00:08:47,277 --> 00:08:49,612
Hey, Abby. This is my sister, Carol Ann.
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00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:51,697
Nice to see you again, Judge!
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00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:56,203
Well, nice to see anything
after staring at that eclipse.
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00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:04,252
So, I was thinking it might be good
194
00:09:04,253 --> 00:09:06,319
to get to know each
other a little better.
195
00:09:06,321 --> 00:09:10,036
Like, what's your favorite food?
What's your favorite animal?
196
00:09:10,038 --> 00:09:13,020
Are you the victim of
an ancient hillbilly curse?
197
00:09:13,637 --> 00:09:16,056
My brother is definitely cursed.
198
00:09:16,058 --> 00:09:18,644
Do you know this dummy has a job
199
00:09:18,646 --> 00:09:20,893
and he don't even get paid for it?
200
00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:24,021
It's called volunteering.
201
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:25,898
I help at the Boys & Girls Club.
202
00:09:25,900 --> 00:09:30,070
Oh, yeah? Well, he was in
an institution for four years.
203
00:09:30,072 --> 00:09:32,029
College.
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00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:34,031
I graduated from UPenn.
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00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:36,785
Short for U-Penitentiary.
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00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:39,870
I assume you know it's not.
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00:09:39,871 --> 00:09:41,998
So, just to be clear,
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00:09:41,999 --> 00:09:43,958
you're a hottie with
an Ivy League degree?
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00:09:43,959 --> 00:09:46,669
Which you've applied towards
helping America's youth?
210
00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:49,393
All while using those
muscles to flip tires
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00:09:49,395 --> 00:09:52,918
and flail big ropes in your
private sweat cathedral?
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00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:59,598
See? What a zero.
213
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,143
He don't even talk good like we done.
214
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,172
I have to run. Red Cross is calling
215
00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:08,899
about an emergency blood donation.
216
00:10:08,900 --> 00:10:12,805
I'm a universal donor,
so I'm everybody's type.
217
00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:15,540
- Yeah, you are.
- Yeah, you are.
218
00:10:17,451 --> 00:10:21,287
Uh, what's a four-letter
word for breakfast?
219
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:24,290
Oh. Never mind. It's sudoku.
220
00:10:25,869 --> 00:10:28,477
Oh. There you are. Tell me
you found the surprise witness
221
00:10:28,479 --> 00:10:31,380
and you weren't sidetracked
by a balloon again.
222
00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:33,140
That balloon looked just like me.
223
00:10:33,142 --> 00:10:35,259
If anything, I didn't look at it enough.
224
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:37,261
But, Dan, Dan, Dan. Focus.
225
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:40,014
I followed Julianne all
night, and, boy, was it fruitful.
226
00:10:40,015 --> 00:10:42,433
"9:15.
227
00:10:42,434 --> 00:10:45,353
J... exits courthouse.
228
00:10:45,354 --> 00:10:49,190
Receives mysterious
package from man at a cart.
229
00:10:49,191 --> 00:10:52,902
Package turns out to be a hot dog."
230
00:10:52,903 --> 00:10:57,239
Then there's a lot of stuff
here about that hot dog.
231
00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,574
Oh! Here we go.
232
00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:00,576
"9:15 again."
233
00:11:00,577 --> 00:11:04,246
I realize it can't still be 9:15.
234
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:07,041
My watch must be dead.
235
00:11:07,042 --> 00:11:12,505
9:15... I ask J for the time.
236
00:11:12,506 --> 00:11:17,110
"She says to stop 'following' her."
237
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,262
How is this fruitful?
238
00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:24,087
Reconvening! People
vs. Bob and June Wheeler.
239
00:11:24,089 --> 00:11:26,357
Oh. Look at us,
reconvening like a real court.
240
00:11:26,359 --> 00:11:27,853
I'm proud of us.
241
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:30,189
Your Honor, I'd like to call a witness.
242
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,358
Ms. Carol Ann Wheeler.
243
00:11:34,069 --> 00:11:36,570
Well, I'll be damned.
244
00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:40,282
She has the same name as our daughter!
245
00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:42,586
And her face, too!
246
00:11:43,578 --> 00:11:45,371
Do you swear to tell
the truth, the whole truth,
247
00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:47,288
and nothing but the truth,
and try to use correct grammar
248
00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:48,541
so we can all follow it?
249
00:11:48,542 --> 00:11:50,835
I did.
250
00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:53,212
Ms. Wheeler, where do you work?
251
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:56,132
I'm a feed rep for General
Frumpton's Chicken Feed.
252
00:11:56,133 --> 00:11:59,636
It's what the thing you eat eats.
253
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:03,797
Carol Ann, tell me. Whose name is signed
254
00:12:03,799 --> 00:12:06,517
on this invoice for 20
pounds of chicken feed?
255
00:12:06,518 --> 00:12:09,603
Oh! I'd recognize that big X anywhere.
256
00:12:09,604 --> 00:12:13,649
That's my daddy's
signature. Bobert Wheeler.
257
00:12:13,651 --> 00:12:15,922
Uh, Your Honor, objection.
258
00:12:15,924 --> 00:12:18,154
Purchasing feed does
not prove ownership.
259
00:12:18,155 --> 00:12:21,736
I happen to recall a woman
who bought a number of cat toys
260
00:12:21,738 --> 00:12:23,284
- but never actually owned a...
- Ah. Sustained.
261
00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:25,786
Movin' right along.
262
00:12:25,787 --> 00:12:27,626
I'd also like to enter into evidence
263
00:12:27,628 --> 00:12:29,039
this thank-you note
264
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:31,876
written in Mrs. Wheeler's handwriting.
265
00:12:31,877 --> 00:12:33,919
"Thank you for being the best big sister
266
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,373
us chickens could ask for.
267
00:12:35,375 --> 00:12:36,578
The feed was delicious.
268
00:12:36,580 --> 00:12:38,703
Lots of cluck, Edna, Otis, James..."
269
00:12:38,705 --> 00:12:41,010
Okay. I'm not reading 40 chicken names!
270
00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:43,053
No further questions, Your Honor.
271
00:12:43,054 --> 00:12:44,930
It never occurred to you to mention
272
00:12:44,932 --> 00:12:47,558
that your daughter was
your chicken-feed dealer?
273
00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:50,478
Why? You need feed?
274
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:53,431
I can hook it up.
275
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,082
I don't know. I got to
be missing something.
276
00:12:58,084 --> 00:13:00,496
No chicken could cause that kind
of damage to a massage parlor.
277
00:13:00,498 --> 00:13:01,989
I mean, what kind of crazy chicken
278
00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:04,950
pecks hot stones into gravel?!
279
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:08,621
Two words! Foghorn Leghorn!
280
00:13:08,622 --> 00:13:12,166
You find that cartoon chicken,
we blow this case wide open!
281
00:13:12,167 --> 00:13:15,252
Murray. Murray. Calm
down. We can figure this out.
282
00:13:15,253 --> 00:13:17,958
Now, tell me. What kind of
dirt did you dig up on Carol Ann?
283
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:20,132
Oh. Lots of dirt. Lots of dirt.
284
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,931
And twigs. And abandoned shoelaces.
285
00:13:22,933 --> 00:13:25,652
What the... Hey! What?! What the hell?!
286
00:13:25,654 --> 00:13:26,722
I'm trying to build a case here!
287
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:28,807
What are you doing, making a nest?!
288
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,143
I didn't like the way those
papers were looking at me.
289
00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:35,064
And I heard what those shoelaces said!
290
00:13:35,065 --> 00:13:36,857
- Murray.
- Hm?
291
00:13:36,858 --> 00:13:38,901
How long have you been
eating Frumpton's feed?
292
00:13:38,902 --> 00:13:42,356
I don't know. One sunrise.
293
00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:45,866
Murray, I think you just saved my case.
294
00:13:45,867 --> 00:13:48,118
That food is poison!
295
00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:50,579
You gotta promise me
you will not stop eating it
296
00:13:50,580 --> 00:13:52,665
until we beat Julianne.
297
00:13:52,666 --> 00:13:55,084
- You know I won't.
- Oh! Ha ha!
298
00:13:55,085 --> 00:13:58,288
Alright.
299
00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:03,384
These are beautiful.
300
00:14:03,386 --> 00:14:05,619
My family thinks flowers
are a waste of money.
301
00:14:05,621 --> 00:14:06,887
That's why at their wedding
302
00:14:06,888 --> 00:14:09,341
Mama threw a bouquet of hose parts.
303
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:15,494
Sorry. What? I was just thinking about
304
00:14:15,496 --> 00:14:18,475
how your jaw line could cut fudge!
305
00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:21,151
Hi, Crash!
306
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:23,529
Girl, calm down.
There's no need to yell.
307
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,698
I'll see you tonight.
308
00:14:25,699 --> 00:14:27,799
So you're going out with a Wheeler?
309
00:14:27,893 --> 00:14:30,159
Yep. And he brought me
these beautiful flowers...
310
00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:34,373
...that are, for some
reason, hissing at me.
311
00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:36,098
Maybe because they were picked
312
00:14:36,100 --> 00:14:39,211
by a cursed man from a cursed garden.
313
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:40,891
Would a cursed man be taking me
314
00:14:40,893 --> 00:14:42,590
to a hot new Italian restaurant tonight?
315
00:14:42,591 --> 00:14:44,800
By any chance, is it Nicolazzo's?
316
00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:46,218
Oh, yeah. Have you heard good things?
317
00:14:46,219 --> 00:14:49,122
It's burning down right now.
318
00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:57,530
Ooh!
319
00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:02,735
Ms. Wheeler, you recognize this man?
320
00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:07,140
No, but he kinda looks
like a balloon I saw once.
321
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:10,275
This is Murray Flobert,
a loving husband,
322
00:15:10,277 --> 00:15:12,453
a respected judge,
323
00:15:12,454 --> 00:15:14,361
a song-and-dance man.
324
00:15:14,363 --> 00:15:16,581
It's song or dance man!
325
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:19,912
I cannot do them together! No one can!
326
00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:24,632
But lately, he has been quick to rage.
327
00:15:24,633 --> 00:15:27,426
What's changed? His diet.
328
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:30,596
He's been eating
General Frumpton's feed,
329
00:15:30,597 --> 00:15:34,231
the same feed that was given
to the Wheelers' chickens.
330
00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:36,541
If the defense wants
to waste people's time
331
00:15:36,543 --> 00:15:38,274
with unfounded claims,
then he should just
332
00:15:38,283 --> 00:15:41,372
bitch to his doorman
like a normal New Yorker!
333
00:15:42,484 --> 00:15:45,235
There is nothin' in our feed
that would cause violence.
334
00:15:45,336 --> 00:15:47,254
The only side effect is happy birds
335
00:15:47,255 --> 00:15:51,259
with the biggest chicken
knockers you've ever seen!
336
00:15:53,470 --> 00:15:56,388
Perhaps you wouldn't
mind demonstrating to us
337
00:15:56,389 --> 00:16:00,193
how harmless the feed is by...
338
00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:03,061
- ...eating it.
- Objection! No.
339
00:16:03,062 --> 00:16:05,153
This is clearly food for animals.
340
00:16:05,155 --> 00:16:07,065
There's... There's a chicken on the bag.
341
00:16:07,066 --> 00:16:08,613
So you have to be a leprechaun
342
00:16:08,615 --> 00:16:11,091
to enjoy the chalky marshmallow hell
343
00:16:11,093 --> 00:16:13,197
that is Lucky Charms?!
344
00:16:13,948 --> 00:16:17,002
That logic is bulletproof. Overruled.
345
00:16:17,753 --> 00:16:19,108
It's fine.
346
00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:22,331
I'd be delighted to
have a tasty bite. Mmm!
347
00:16:22,332 --> 00:16:26,794
Can Really taste the corn
and the... and the millet. Mmm!
348
00:16:26,795 --> 00:16:29,129
Nyum-nyum-nyum-nyum-nyum,
nyum-nyum-nyum-nyum!
349
00:16:29,130 --> 00:16:33,759
Let the record show that the
witness is clearly fake eating
350
00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:38,430
and that her space
work is middling at best.
351
00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:41,308
Why won't you eat the feed, Carol Ann?
352
00:16:41,309 --> 00:16:44,913
Why won't you eat the feed?!
353
00:16:45,515 --> 00:16:47,173
Because it's full of steroids
354
00:16:47,175 --> 00:16:50,769
and I'm happy with
the size of my knockers!
355
00:16:53,323 --> 00:16:54,885
So the chickens' violence
356
00:16:54,887 --> 00:16:56,865
is not the Wheelers' fault at all!
357
00:16:56,866 --> 00:17:01,537
The blame falls squarely on
General Frumpton's shoulders!
358
00:17:01,538 --> 00:17:04,206
- No more questions, Your Honor.
- You may step down.
359
00:17:04,207 --> 00:17:06,268
As a reformed arsonist, I'm not so sure
360
00:17:06,270 --> 00:17:08,585
you're supposed to be
this close to me because,
361
00:17:08,586 --> 00:17:11,440
hoo-hoo, I'm on fire!
362
00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:14,769
Freakin' Wheelers.
363
00:17:14,771 --> 00:17:17,489
They may be the most insufferable family
364
00:17:17,491 --> 00:17:20,815
I've ever met, and I went
camping with the Mansons.
365
00:17:21,558 --> 00:17:23,475
Alright. Listen. We did it.
366
00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:25,227
Now all you have to do is testify
367
00:17:25,228 --> 00:17:28,063
that you gave the feed to
the chickens, and we win.
368
00:17:28,064 --> 00:17:29,648
- Seems simple enough.
- Yeah.
369
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:34,154
Your Honor, we
change our plea to guilty.
370
00:17:35,373 --> 00:17:40,502
We're taking the deal that
flight attendant offered us.
371
00:17:41,828 --> 00:17:43,020
Whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you doing?!
372
00:17:43,022 --> 00:17:44,872
I object! Wait.
373
00:17:44,873 --> 00:17:46,832
Can I object to my own clients?
374
00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:49,126
Well, you know, when
life gives you lemons,
375
00:17:49,127 --> 00:17:52,546
you don't ask why the
lemons are so stupid.
376
00:17:52,547 --> 00:17:54,590
You got a deal.
377
00:17:54,591 --> 00:17:57,193
Okay. Court is adjourned.
378
00:17:59,804 --> 00:18:03,608
I want it on the record. This
is in no way curse-related.
379
00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:08,520
I can't believe I lost.
380
00:18:08,521 --> 00:18:10,397
I can't believe I won.
381
00:18:10,398 --> 00:18:12,793
I mean, I knew I'd win until
the moment I thought you'd won,
382
00:18:12,795 --> 00:18:15,354
and then I couldn't believe I won.
383
00:18:16,654 --> 00:18:19,031
You know, I'm getting
sick of defending people.
384
00:18:19,032 --> 00:18:20,570
Oh! Wait.
385
00:18:20,572 --> 00:18:22,910
What does a lighthouse
keeper pull down these days?
386
00:18:22,911 --> 00:18:26,121
I mean, I've already got the beard.
387
00:18:26,122 --> 00:18:28,707
- And I love being alone.
- Yeah.
388
00:18:28,708 --> 00:18:30,236
Well, for what it's worth,
389
00:18:30,238 --> 00:18:32,377
you did a hell of a job up there.
390
00:18:32,378 --> 00:18:34,117
You too.
391
00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:36,763
Actually, it's the best fun
I've had in quite a while
392
00:18:36,765 --> 00:18:38,508
till the Wheelers threw
me under the bus.
393
00:18:38,509 --> 00:18:42,264
Well, as the bus, it
was my favorite part.
394
00:18:42,931 --> 00:18:44,556
Hey, there, Mr. Fielding!
395
00:18:44,557 --> 00:18:47,160
Bye, there, Mr. Fielding!
396
00:18:48,810 --> 00:18:51,062
We just wanted to say thank you.
397
00:18:51,064 --> 00:18:53,482
Because of your good lawyering,
398
00:18:53,483 --> 00:18:56,364
General Frumpton gave
us a financial reward
399
00:18:56,366 --> 00:18:58,195
in exchange for our silence.
400
00:18:58,196 --> 00:18:59,780
So that's why you
took the plea deal, huh?
401
00:18:59,781 --> 00:19:01,448
Screwed me for a little bit of money.
402
00:19:01,449 --> 00:19:05,035
- It was a lot of bit of money.
- Yeah...
403
00:19:05,036 --> 00:19:06,995
But some of it is for you.
404
00:19:06,996 --> 00:19:08,497
No, I don't want your curse.
405
00:19:08,498 --> 00:19:11,959
Ohh!
406
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:13,877
$300,000?
407
00:19:13,878 --> 00:19:17,297
We're using the rest to
open our own theme park...
408
00:19:17,298 --> 00:19:20,092
Wheeler World.
409
00:19:20,093 --> 00:19:23,946
It's like a water park but with mud.
410
00:19:26,683 --> 00:19:29,285
We're looking for investors.
411
00:19:32,981 --> 00:19:37,109
Yes. I would, um, like
to invest in my future.
412
00:19:37,110 --> 00:19:38,527
There you go.
413
00:19:38,528 --> 00:19:41,830
Please... never come back.
414
00:19:44,799 --> 00:19:47,402
We could never quit him.
415
00:19:51,177 --> 00:19:52,582
Still no word from Abby.
416
00:19:52,583 --> 00:19:54,900
No, but I have a Google alert set
417
00:19:54,902 --> 00:19:58,755
for "blonde, judge, terrible accident."
418
00:20:00,925 --> 00:20:02,968
Oh. False alarm.
419
00:20:02,969 --> 00:20:05,881
Heidi Klum fell off a trampoline.
420
00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:10,308
There's someone who hasn't
been struck by indoor lightning!
421
00:20:10,309 --> 00:20:12,602
- Did your date go well?
- Mm-hmm.
422
00:20:12,603 --> 00:20:14,980
- Did you get a good-night kiss?
- Mm-hmm.
423
00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:16,145
Did that kiss do something to you
424
00:20:16,147 --> 00:20:18,650
that makes it hard for you to speak?
425
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:21,611
What makes ya say that?
426
00:20:21,612 --> 00:20:23,170
Why are you talking like a Wheeler?
427
00:20:23,172 --> 00:20:25,866
The curse!
428
00:20:25,867 --> 00:20:27,868
It's not a curse.
429
00:20:27,869 --> 00:20:30,643
What it was, was we was
kissing in the French style,
430
00:20:30,645 --> 00:20:32,622
and I had a reaction
to the shrimp he ate.
431
00:20:32,623 --> 00:20:35,542
So now my lips are numb
and my tongue is big.
432
00:20:35,543 --> 00:20:38,795
Abby, if this is what
happens after only one date,
433
00:20:38,796 --> 00:20:40,797
we're all in grave danger.
434
00:20:40,798 --> 00:20:44,302
Come on! There's no
such thing as a curse.
435
00:20:47,263 --> 00:20:49,139
Okay. Look.
436
00:20:49,140 --> 00:20:51,035
There's a great
person out there for you.
437
00:20:51,037 --> 00:20:52,388
But you're never gonna find him
438
00:20:52,390 --> 00:20:54,812
if a piano lands on your head.
439
00:20:55,367 --> 00:20:57,355
Dagnabbit. You guys are so sweet.
440
00:20:57,356 --> 00:20:59,120
- Oh, hell no!
- Get that cursed monkey paw
441
00:20:59,122 --> 00:21:01,109
away from me!
442
00:21:01,110 --> 00:21:04,488
Okay. Fine. I'll call it off.
443
00:21:04,489 --> 00:21:07,616
"Crash. We can't see each other no more.
444
00:21:07,617 --> 00:21:09,409
Goodbye forever."
445
00:21:09,410 --> 00:21:10,991
There. Did it.
446
00:21:17,710 --> 00:21:21,915
Fine. I'll done do
it for real this time.
447
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:28,280
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