All language subtitles for Tyler Perrys House of Payne - S05E06 - Payne And Prejudice WEBDL-1080p_track3_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,833 --> 00:00:04,967 OOH! OOH! TAMALES, 2 00:00:04,967 --> 00:00:06,367 ENCHILADAS. 3 00:00:06,367 --> 00:00:08,500 CURTIS, STOP. HONEY, THIS 4 00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:09,833 IS FOR DINNER TONIGHT AT 5 00:00:09,833 --> 00:00:11,833 THE HERNANDEZES. 6 00:00:11,833 --> 00:00:13,133 I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU INSISTED 7 00:00:13,133 --> 00:00:14,900 ON US BRINGING MEXICAN FOOD. 8 00:00:14,900 --> 00:00:15,500 I DON'T KNOW WHY YO 9 00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:16,333 I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU INSISTEI 10 00:00:16,333 --> 00:00:17,700 ON ME GOING. 11 00:00:17,700 --> 00:00:19,200 CURTIS, I SHOULD HAVE MADE 12 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:19,967 MY POT ROAST. 13 00:00:19,967 --> 00:00:20,733 MY POT ROAST. 14 00:00:20,733 --> 00:00:22,100 OR WE COULD HAVE JUST MADE 15 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:22,533 TACOS. 16 00:00:22,533 --> 00:00:23,500 THEY'RE WAY EASIER. 17 00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:24,800 LOOK, WHEN YOU GO TO AN 18 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:26,100 ITALIAN RESTAURANT, WHAT DO 19 00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:26,600 YOU EAT? 20 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:27,167 ITALIAN. 21 00:00:27,167 --> 00:00:28,200 WHEN YOU GO TO A CHINESE 22 00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:29,467 RESTAURANT, WHAT DO YOU EAT? 23 00:00:29,467 --> 00:00:30,833 A CHEESEBURGER, BUT THAT'S 24 00:00:30,833 --> 00:00:34,000 JUST ME. 25 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:35,033 OH. 26 00:00:35,033 --> 00:00:37,133 YOU'RE TRYING TO MAKE A POINT. 27 00:00:37,133 --> 00:00:38,800 MM-HMM. 28 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:39,767 I'M SORRY. 29 00:00:39,767 --> 00:00:41,400 UH, I EAT CHINESE. 30 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:42,433 THANK YOU. 31 00:00:42,433 --> 00:00:43,900 NOW, WE'RE GOING TO A MEXICAN 32 00:00:43,900 --> 00:00:45,267 HOUSE, SO WE'RE GONNA EAT 33 00:00:45,267 --> 00:00:45,867 MEXICAN. 34 00:00:45,867 --> 00:00:46,867 ARRIBA, ARRIBA. 35 00:00:46,867 --> 00:00:48,433 OKAY, THAT'S JUST HOW IT IS. 36 00:00:48,433 --> 00:00:49,700 CURTIS, WAIT, BABY. 37 00:00:49,700 --> 00:00:51,267 HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO 38 00:00:51,267 --> 00:00:52,833 TELL YOU, THE HERNANDEZES 39 00:00:52,833 --> 00:00:54,833 ARE NOT JUST MEXICAN. 40 00:00:54,833 --> 00:00:57,400 NOW, CARLOS IS HALF-MEXICAN AND 41 00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:58,500 HALF-CUBAN. 42 00:00:58,500 --> 00:01:00,633 ELLA, CUBA AIN'T NOTHING 43 00:01:00,633 --> 00:01:02,767 BUT MEXICO ON THE, UH, WEST SIDE 44 00:01:02,767 --> 00:01:04,233 OF FLORIDA. 45 00:01:04,233 --> 00:01:05,800 EVERYBODY KNOW THAT. 46 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:07,900 OKAY, AND ROSIE, BABY, IS 47 00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:09,233 FROM PUERTO RICO. 48 00:01:09,233 --> 00:01:11,200 [ Spanish accent ] PUERTO 49 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:12,133 RICO? 50 00:01:12,133 --> 00:01:14,333 IT'S MEXICO IN THE MIDDLE OF 51 00:01:14,333 --> 00:01:16,200 THE PACIFICO. 52 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,400 IT'S AN ISLAND. 53 00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:19,067 DUMMY-O. 54 00:01:19,067 --> 00:01:20,567 CURTIS, YOU KNOW WHAT? 55 00:01:20,567 --> 00:01:22,067 YOU AMAZE ME. 56 00:01:22,067 --> 00:01:23,333 YOU ARE A STRAIGHT-UP 57 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:23,933 JACK-- 58 00:01:23,933 --> 00:01:26,133 UH... 59 00:01:26,133 --> 00:01:27,967 JACK--JACK--JACQUELINE. 60 00:01:27,967 --> 00:01:28,833 JACK. 61 00:01:28,833 --> 00:01:30,100 YOU WATCH TOO MUCH CABLE. 62 00:01:30,100 --> 00:01:31,133 WHAT ABOUT THE DESSERT? 63 00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:32,800 OH! OH! 64 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:33,833 THANK YOU. 65 00:01:33,833 --> 00:01:35,600 HEY! I GOT THE... 66 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:37,400 DID YOU GET IT? 67 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:40,100 YEP. 68 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:41,833 [ WHOOPS ] 69 00:01:41,833 --> 00:01:47,067 [ HUMMING MARIACHI TUNE ] 70 00:01:47,067 --> 00:01:48,133 [ SIRENS WAIL ] 71 00:01:48,133 --> 00:01:49,867 [ HORN HONKS ] 72 00:01:49,867 --> 00:01:51,233 [ TIRES SCREECH ] 73 00:01:54,133 --> 00:01:55,667 [ RINGTONE PLAYS ] 74 00:01:55,667 --> 00:01:56,900 DANA, WHEN YOU GONNA GET A 75 00:01:56,900 --> 00:01:58,133 GROWNUP RINGTONE? 76 00:01:58,167 --> 00:01:59,467 I CAN HAVE WHATEVER RINGTONE 77 00:01:59,467 --> 00:02:00,800 THAT I WANT 'CAUSE I'M A GROWN 78 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:02,400 WOMAN. 79 00:02:02,433 --> 00:02:03,833 HELLO? 80 00:02:03,833 --> 00:02:05,533 HI, DADDY. 81 00:02:05,533 --> 00:02:07,133 IS THAT HER DADDY OR HER 82 00:02:07,133 --> 00:02:08,900 SUGAR DADDY? 83 00:02:08,900 --> 00:02:09,900 WHAT?! 84 00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:12,733 WELL [ SPEAKING KOREAN ] 85 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:14,200 THAT'S HER DADDY. 86 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:15,400 YEAH. 87 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:16,500 [ SPEAKING KOREAN ] 88 00:02:16,533 --> 00:02:17,467 YOU KNOW WHAT? 89 00:02:17,467 --> 00:02:19,067 THIS IS JUST LIKE ONE OF THOSE 90 00:02:19,067 --> 00:02:20,400 KUNG FU MOVIES WITHOUT ALL THE 91 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:20,800 "FU." 92 00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:21,933 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? 93 00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:23,200 OKAY, WELL, I MEAN, I CAN 94 00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:24,567 JUST MEET YOU GUYS LATER AT THE 95 00:02:24,567 --> 00:02:25,633 HOTEL. 96 00:02:25,667 --> 00:02:27,467 OKAY. 97 00:02:27,467 --> 00:02:28,900 OKAY. 98 00:02:28,900 --> 00:02:29,833 BYE. 99 00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:30,567 OH, MY GOD! 100 00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:31,533 OKAY, I NEED SOME HELP! 101 00:02:31,533 --> 00:02:32,433 I N-- I NEED SCRUBS. 102 00:02:32,433 --> 00:02:33,333 I NEED MEDICAL BOOKS. 103 00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:34,100 I NEED NOTEBOOKS. 104 00:02:34,100 --> 00:02:35,367 I NEED A STETHOSCOPE. 105 00:02:35,367 --> 00:02:36,533 I NEED -- I NEED -- 106 00:02:36,533 --> 00:02:37,967 HELP! HELP ME! 107 00:02:37,967 --> 00:02:39,067 YOU CALM DOWN. 108 00:02:39,067 --> 00:02:39,967 YOU CALM DOWN. 109 00:02:39,967 --> 00:02:41,067 YOU'RE SCARING ME. 110 00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:43,533 I MEAN, THE CUSTOMERS. 111 00:02:43,533 --> 00:02:44,367 YOU ALL RIGHT? 112 00:02:44,367 --> 00:02:45,200 YEAH, I'M OKAY. 113 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:45,833 YOU SURE? 114 00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:46,733 YEAH, I PROMISE. 115 00:02:46,733 --> 00:02:47,667 WHOA! 116 00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:48,967 YOUR LITTLE CHINESE GIRL DONE 117 00:02:48,967 --> 00:02:49,900 LOST HER MIND, FLOYD. 118 00:02:49,900 --> 00:02:51,133 FOR THE LAST TIME, I'M 119 00:02:51,133 --> 00:02:52,233 KOREAN, AND THERE'S A 120 00:02:52,233 --> 00:02:52,900 DIFFERENCE. 121 00:02:52,900 --> 00:02:54,133 WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? 122 00:02:54,133 --> 00:02:55,467 Y'ALL BOTH CHARGE EXTRA FOR 123 00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:56,100 DUCK SAUCE. 124 00:02:56,100 --> 00:02:57,333 AND WHAT'S IN DUCK SAUCE? 125 00:02:57,333 --> 00:02:58,900 WHAT IS IT, YOU JUST SQUEEZE THE 126 00:02:58,900 --> 00:03:00,367 NECK OF A DUCK AND THEY JUST 127 00:03:00,367 --> 00:03:01,100 BURP UP THE SAUCE? 128 00:03:01,100 --> 00:03:01,533 FLOYD! 129 00:03:01,533 --> 00:03:02,600 THEM LITTLE ORANGE SPECKS, 130 00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:03,467 THOUGH, THEY SCARE ME. 131 00:03:03,467 --> 00:03:06,067 I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS. 132 00:03:06,067 --> 00:03:07,067 NOW, ARE YOU CALM? 133 00:03:07,067 --> 00:03:07,900 I'M CALM. 134 00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:08,967 ARE YOU CALM? ARE YOU GOOD? 135 00:03:08,967 --> 00:03:09,567 I PROMISE. 136 00:03:09,567 --> 00:03:10,833 SHE GOOD, GIRL. COME ON. 137 00:03:10,833 --> 00:03:11,933 NOW, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? 138 00:03:11,933 --> 00:03:14,133 I KIND OF TOLD MY PARENTS 139 00:03:14,133 --> 00:03:15,933 A LITTLE WHITE LIE. 140 00:03:15,933 --> 00:03:17,067 I TOLD THEM I WAS IN COLLEGE 141 00:03:17,067 --> 00:03:18,367 PREMED. 142 00:03:18,367 --> 00:03:20,867 [ BOTH LAUGHING ] 143 00:03:20,867 --> 00:03:22,533 ARE YOU SERIOUS? 144 00:03:22,533 --> 00:03:24,233 HA HA! 145 00:03:24,233 --> 00:03:25,767 HELL NO! 146 00:03:25,767 --> 00:03:26,733 PREMED? 147 00:03:26,733 --> 00:03:28,967 YOU COULDN'T EVEN SPELL "PRE." 148 00:03:28,967 --> 00:03:29,700 SPELL IT, SPELL IT. 149 00:03:29,700 --> 00:03:31,167 SEE, SHE CAN'T DO IT! 150 00:03:31,167 --> 00:03:34,400 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 151 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:34,767 NURSE? 152 00:03:34,767 --> 00:03:35,267 DOCTOR? 153 00:03:35,267 --> 00:03:35,667 NURSE? 154 00:03:35,667 --> 00:03:36,133 DOCTOR? 155 00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:36,567 HOLD UP. 156 00:03:36,567 --> 00:03:37,533 WHY I GOTTA BE THE NURSE? 157 00:03:37,533 --> 00:03:38,567 WHY YOU CAN'T BE THE NURSE? 158 00:03:38,567 --> 00:03:39,333 I'LL BE THE DOCTOR. 159 00:03:39,333 --> 00:03:40,267 NO, NO, YOU GOTTA BE THE 160 00:03:40,267 --> 00:03:41,333 NURSE 'CAUSE I'M WAITING ON A 161 00:03:41,333 --> 00:03:41,900 SPONGE BATH. 162 00:03:41,900 --> 00:03:42,433 EW! 163 00:03:42,433 --> 00:03:43,667 HELLO! OVER HERE! 164 00:03:43,667 --> 00:03:44,767 CRISIS OVER HERE. 165 00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,333 HELP ME! 166 00:03:46,333 --> 00:03:47,933 SO NEEDY. 167 00:03:47,933 --> 00:03:49,600 DANA, WHY YOU TELL A LIE 168 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:50,633 LIKE THAT FOR? 169 00:03:50,633 --> 00:03:52,067 WELL, MY DAD'S A TOP SURGEON 170 00:03:52,067 --> 00:03:53,533 IN BOSTON, AND SO WHEN I DROPPED 171 00:03:53,533 --> 00:03:54,967 OUT OF SCHOOL, I DIDN'T WANT TO 172 00:03:54,967 --> 00:03:56,433 DISAPPOINT HIM SO I DIDN'T TELL 173 00:03:56,433 --> 00:03:57,433 HIM THE WHOLE TRUTH. 174 00:03:57,433 --> 00:03:58,733 SO, WHY DID YOU DROP OUT OF 175 00:03:58,733 --> 00:03:59,200 SCHOOL? 176 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:00,600 FIRST OF ALL, THERE'S A LOT 177 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:02,100 OF READING AND WRITING INVOLVED, 178 00:04:02,100 --> 00:04:03,467 AND I CAN'T BE DOING ALL THAT. 179 00:04:03,467 --> 00:04:04,700 AND THEN SECONDLY, THEM COATS 180 00:04:04,700 --> 00:04:05,900 MADE ME LOOK FAT, AND THERE 181 00:04:05,900 --> 00:04:07,267 AREN'T ANY CUTE BOYS IN SCHOOL! 182 00:04:07,267 --> 00:04:08,500 THIS IS AN EXAMPLE OF THE 183 00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:09,800 BRAND-NEW DUMB I WAS TALKING 184 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:10,233 ABOUT. 185 00:04:10,233 --> 00:04:11,400 I'M GONNA HELP YOU, LITTLE 186 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:12,133 BRAIN-DEAD ONE. 187 00:04:12,133 --> 00:04:14,200 SIT BACK. 188 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:15,733 I'M GONNA GET ALL THOSE LITTLE 189 00:04:15,733 --> 00:04:17,067 SUPPLIES FOR YOU, OKAY? 190 00:04:17,067 --> 00:04:17,633 YES, YES. 191 00:04:17,633 --> 00:04:19,333 'CAUSE, SEE, I GOT AN EYE CHART, 192 00:04:19,333 --> 00:04:20,933 I GOT A STETHOSCOPE, AND I GOT 193 00:04:20,933 --> 00:04:22,567 A DEFIBRILLATOR, AND I EVEN GOT 194 00:04:22,567 --> 00:04:24,067 SOME GLOW-IN-THE-DARK LATEX 195 00:04:24,067 --> 00:04:24,867 GLOVES. 196 00:04:24,867 --> 00:04:26,900 I'M GOING STRAIGHT TO THE FREAKY 197 00:04:26,900 --> 00:04:27,567 BOX TODAY. 198 00:04:30,267 --> 00:04:31,700 SO, DANA -- I MEAN 199 00:04:31,700 --> 00:04:33,267 DR. CARTER... 200 00:04:33,267 --> 00:04:34,833 WHEN WILL WE GET TO MEET YOUR 201 00:04:34,833 --> 00:04:35,433 PARENTS? 202 00:04:35,433 --> 00:04:36,700 [ Nasally ] PAGING 203 00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:38,300 DR. CARTER, PAGING DR. CARTER. 204 00:04:38,300 --> 00:04:40,300 WE HAVE TO HAVE YOU TO REPORT TO 205 00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:42,067 SURGERY FOR A FUNGI ON A BIG 206 00:04:42,067 --> 00:04:43,167 TOE. 207 00:04:43,167 --> 00:04:45,100 HA HA HA, REALLY FUNNY. 208 00:04:45,100 --> 00:04:46,133 BUT MY PARENTS ARE STILL 209 00:04:46,133 --> 00:04:47,367 SIGHTSEEING, SO I'M GONNA MEET 210 00:04:47,367 --> 00:04:48,233 UP WITH THEM LATER. 211 00:04:48,233 --> 00:04:49,167 OH, MY GOD! 212 00:04:49,167 --> 00:04:50,233 OH, MY GOD! THEY'RE HERE! 213 00:04:50,233 --> 00:04:51,267 WHAT ARE THEY DOING HERE? 214 00:04:51,267 --> 00:04:52,500 OH, MY GOD! WHAT AM I GONNA DO? 215 00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:53,467 SHE'S DOING IT AGAIN. 216 00:04:53,467 --> 00:04:54,567 OH, GOD. 217 00:04:54,567 --> 00:04:55,367 COME HERE. 218 00:04:55,367 --> 00:04:56,300 SIT DOWN! 219 00:04:56,300 --> 00:05:00,667 DO MY NAILS. I'LL PAY YOU $20. 220 00:05:00,667 --> 00:05:03,367 JUST DO MY DAMN NAILS. 221 00:05:03,367 --> 00:05:03,767 UHH! 222 00:05:03,767 --> 00:05:05,333 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE REALLY ROUGH. 223 00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:06,867 I MEAN, HOW DO YOU GUYS FIND 224 00:05:06,867 --> 00:05:07,800 YOUR EMPLOYEES? 225 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:08,767 THAT'S -- 226 00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:09,633 THIS IS AWFUL. 227 00:05:09,633 --> 00:05:11,200 I WOULD NEVER PAY ANYBODY TO DO 228 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:12,167 A TIP LIKE THIS. 229 00:05:12,167 --> 00:05:13,167 [ SCOFFS ] PLEASE. 230 00:05:13,167 --> 00:05:15,100 OH, MY GOSH! 231 00:05:15,100 --> 00:05:17,100 MOM AND DAD! 232 00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:18,333 WHAT A SURPRISE. 233 00:05:18,333 --> 00:05:19,500 OH, HELLO. 234 00:05:19,500 --> 00:05:22,133 HOW ARE YOU? 235 00:05:22,133 --> 00:05:24,833 MY, MY, MY, MY, MY. 236 00:05:24,833 --> 00:05:26,300 DANA, YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOUR 237 00:05:26,300 --> 00:05:30,167 MAMA WAS...SO FINE. 238 00:05:30,167 --> 00:05:33,267 [ PURRS ] 239 00:05:33,267 --> 00:05:35,067 UH, THANK YOU. 240 00:05:35,067 --> 00:05:36,067 I THINK. 241 00:05:36,067 --> 00:05:37,767 AND WHO ARE YOU? 242 00:05:37,767 --> 00:05:38,533 ME? 243 00:05:38,533 --> 00:05:41,067 I'M YOUR WIFE'S NEXT HUSBAND. 244 00:05:41,067 --> 00:05:44,067 [ CHUCKLES ] 245 00:05:44,067 --> 00:05:44,867 LOOK HERE. 246 00:05:44,867 --> 00:05:46,233 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. 247 00:05:46,233 --> 00:05:49,433 TELL ME THIS, JACKIE CHAN... 248 00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:51,933 HOW IS IT THAT A VERTICALLY 249 00:05:51,933 --> 00:05:54,200 DEPRIVED MAN LIKE YOURSELF 250 00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:57,200 END UP BEING WITH SUCH A FINE 251 00:05:57,200 --> 00:06:00,167 NUBIAN PRINCESS AS THIS? 252 00:06:00,167 --> 00:06:01,533 YOU WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO 253 00:06:01,533 --> 00:06:02,867 WITH A NUBIAN PRINCESS IF YOU 254 00:06:02,867 --> 00:06:04,867 HAD ONE, BRO. 255 00:06:04,867 --> 00:06:06,767 DID HE CALL ME "BRO"? 256 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:08,200 I KNOW GOLLUM FROM THE DOGGONE 257 00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:09,633 "LORD OF THE RINGS" DIDN'T CALL 258 00:06:09,633 --> 00:06:10,100 ME NO BRO. 259 00:06:10,100 --> 00:06:12,400 NO, NO, NO, NO. 260 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:13,133 I DON'T KNOW. 261 00:06:13,133 --> 00:06:14,300 HE A BLACK BELT, FLOYD. 262 00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:15,733 CAN'T BE NO BLACK BELT WITH 263 00:06:15,733 --> 00:06:19,167 NO BROWN SUIT ON. 264 00:06:19,167 --> 00:06:20,200 YOU KNOW WHAT, MOM, DAD? 265 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,133 WHY DON'T YOU GUYS FINISH 266 00:06:21,133 --> 00:06:22,667 SIGHTSEEING AND, UM, I'LL 267 00:06:22,667 --> 00:06:24,267 CATCH UP WITH YOU GUYS LATER 268 00:06:24,267 --> 00:06:26,233 AFTER I GET MY NAILS DONE. 269 00:06:26,233 --> 00:06:27,300 SO YOU GUYS SHOULD JUST GO. 270 00:06:27,300 --> 00:06:29,733 JUST... 271 00:06:29,733 --> 00:06:31,200 NO, SWEETHEART, WE'RE GOING 272 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:32,300 TO WAIT HERE FOR YOU. 273 00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:35,067 YOUR MAMA CAN STAY. 274 00:06:35,067 --> 00:06:36,167 A-AND YOU KNOW WHAT, 275 00:06:36,167 --> 00:06:36,867 MRS. CARTER? 276 00:06:36,867 --> 00:06:38,167 YOU COULD GET YOUR NAILS DONE. 277 00:06:38,167 --> 00:06:38,833 HOW ABOUT IT? 278 00:06:38,833 --> 00:06:39,733 OH, NO, YOU NEED IT. 279 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:40,400 [ CHUCKLES ] 280 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:41,300 YOU NEED IT, MAMA. 281 00:06:41,300 --> 00:06:41,867 YEAH. 282 00:06:41,867 --> 00:06:43,867 I COULD STRIKE A MATCH ON THESE 283 00:06:43,867 --> 00:06:44,467 THINGS. 284 00:06:44,467 --> 00:06:45,400 SIT ON DOWN. 285 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:46,267 SIT ON DOWN. 286 00:06:46,267 --> 00:06:48,867 [ Asian accent ] SO, COME. 287 00:06:48,867 --> 00:06:50,433 LET ME SHOW YOU HAIRCUT WE CAN 288 00:06:50,433 --> 00:06:52,067 DO FOR YOU. 289 00:06:52,067 --> 00:06:54,300 YOU CAN HAVE NUMBER 1, 2, 3. 290 00:06:54,300 --> 00:06:55,200 OH, I'M SORRY. 291 00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:57,233 UNO, DOS, TRES, QUATRO. 292 00:06:57,233 --> 00:06:59,333 UH, HONEY...HURRY UP, PLEASE, 293 00:06:59,333 --> 00:07:03,767 BEFORE I PERFORM A CASTRATION. 294 00:07:03,767 --> 00:07:05,067 YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, COME ON. 295 00:07:05,067 --> 00:07:06,167 DO MY MOM'S NAILS, LADY. 296 00:07:06,167 --> 00:07:10,200 COME ON, DO MY MOM'S NAILS. 297 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:11,100 NO, NO, NO. 298 00:07:11,100 --> 00:07:14,067 GONNA DO MY MOM'S NAILS. 299 00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,233 AND WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS 300 00:07:15,233 --> 00:07:16,567 THIS WHERE THE WORKERS JUST GET 301 00:07:16,567 --> 00:07:17,200 UP AND LEAVE? 302 00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:18,233 YOU KNOW WHAT, MOM? 303 00:07:18,233 --> 00:07:19,567 YOU KNOW, SHE SUCKED ANYWAYS. 304 00:07:19,567 --> 00:07:20,833 I CAN DO YOUR NAILS FOR YOU. 305 00:07:20,833 --> 00:07:22,833 YOU KNOW, SINCE I USED TO DO 306 00:07:22,833 --> 00:07:24,833 NAILS. 307 00:07:24,833 --> 00:07:25,867 SHE GET THAT FROM HER 308 00:07:25,867 --> 00:07:28,400 FATHER'S SIDE. 309 00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:29,900 HOW DID YOU GUYS KNOW I WAS 310 00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:30,967 HERE? 311 00:07:30,967 --> 00:07:32,733 YOUR ROOMMATE SHERI TOLD US 312 00:07:32,733 --> 00:07:33,667 YOU'D BE HERE. 313 00:07:33,667 --> 00:07:34,733 SHERI, HUH? 314 00:07:34,733 --> 00:07:36,667 I KNEW I SHOULDN'T HAVE STOLEN 315 00:07:36,667 --> 00:07:39,067 HER MAN. 316 00:07:39,067 --> 00:07:40,733 SO, I KNOW YOU TWO MUST BE 317 00:07:40,733 --> 00:07:42,300 PROUD OF YOUR DOCTOR-TO-BE. 318 00:07:42,300 --> 00:07:43,833 OH, YES, WE'RE VERY, VERY 319 00:07:43,833 --> 00:07:45,233 PROUD. 320 00:07:45,233 --> 00:07:46,600 SO, WAIT A MINUTE, NOW. 321 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,133 I THINK YOUR DISCIPLINE IS GONNA 322 00:07:48,133 --> 00:07:49,500 BE, UH, PEDIATRICIAN, RIGHT, 323 00:07:49,500 --> 00:07:49,867 DANA? 324 00:07:49,867 --> 00:07:51,067 OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. 325 00:07:51,067 --> 00:07:52,567 YOU KNOW, ANY FIELD THAT DOESN'T 326 00:07:52,567 --> 00:07:53,967 REQUIRE WORKING WITH CHILDREN, 327 00:07:53,967 --> 00:07:55,833 I'M GOOD. 328 00:07:55,833 --> 00:07:56,367 HUH? 329 00:07:56,367 --> 00:07:57,800 YOU REAL PROUD NOW, AIN'T 330 00:07:57,800 --> 00:07:58,133 YOU? 331 00:07:58,133 --> 00:07:59,500 SO, DANA, WHY DON'T YOU TELL 332 00:07:59,500 --> 00:08:00,933 YOUR MAMA AND DADDY ABOUT THAT 333 00:08:00,933 --> 00:08:02,067 NEW COURSE YOU'RE TAKING? 334 00:08:02,067 --> 00:08:03,667 YOU KNOW, LIE-OLOGY. 335 00:08:03,667 --> 00:08:05,500 OH, SHE'S JUST TELLING JOKES. 336 00:08:05,500 --> 00:08:06,467 SHE GOT JOKES. [ LAUGHS ] 337 00:08:06,467 --> 00:08:07,467 SHE'S SO FUNNY. 338 00:08:07,467 --> 00:08:10,500 [ TELEPHONE RINGS ] 339 00:08:10,500 --> 00:08:11,800 YOU KNOW, DOCTOR, 340 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,333 PROFESSIONAL COURTESY, IF YOU 341 00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:14,067 DON'T MIND. 342 00:08:14,067 --> 00:08:15,567 I GOT THIS LITTLE THING ON MY 343 00:08:15,567 --> 00:08:16,967 TOE RIGHT THERE. 344 00:08:16,967 --> 00:08:18,133 I'M NOT A PODIATRIST. 345 00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:19,333 I CAN'T EVEN WALK ON IT. 346 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:20,567 PLEASE LOOK AT IT. PLEASE. 347 00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:21,767 I DIDN'T SAY NOTHING ABOUT 348 00:08:21,767 --> 00:08:22,667 POTATOES, THOUGH. 349 00:08:22,667 --> 00:08:24,933 YOU COULD HAVE LOOKED, THOUGH. 350 00:08:24,933 --> 00:08:26,167 DANA, THAT WAS YOUR 5:00. 351 00:08:26,167 --> 00:08:27,067 THEY HAD TO CANCEL. 352 00:08:27,067 --> 00:08:28,133 SHH! 353 00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:30,267 YOUR 5:00 WHAT? 354 00:08:30,267 --> 00:08:33,500 UM, UH... 355 00:08:33,500 --> 00:08:35,400 MY FROG-DISSECTING CLASS. 356 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:36,933 YEAH. THAT'S IT. 357 00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:37,733 GOOD ONE. 358 00:08:37,733 --> 00:08:38,333 DANA? 359 00:08:38,333 --> 00:08:38,833 HMM? 360 00:08:38,833 --> 00:08:40,533 WHAT'S GOING ON HERE, HONEY? 361 00:08:40,533 --> 00:08:41,400 OH, MY BAD. 362 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,067 I WAS JUST TRIPPING, YOU KNOW. 363 00:08:43,067 --> 00:08:44,567 I MEANT MY LOBOTOMY CLASS. 364 00:08:44,567 --> 00:08:46,100 [ LAUGHS ] 365 00:08:50,733 --> 00:08:52,267 MY ASTROLOGY CLASS? 366 00:08:52,267 --> 00:08:55,067 AW, DAMN. 367 00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,333 OKAY. 368 00:08:57,333 --> 00:08:58,767 I'M NOT IN SCHOOL ANYMORE. 369 00:08:58,767 --> 00:09:00,100 WHAT? 370 00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:01,100 WHEN DID YOU DROP OUT? 371 00:09:01,100 --> 00:09:01,700 DROP OUT? 372 00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:02,533 I DIDN'T DROP OUT. 373 00:09:02,533 --> 00:09:03,633 OH, DAD, YOU'RE A TRIP. 374 00:09:03,633 --> 00:09:05,167 [ LAUGHS ] DROP OUT. 375 00:09:05,167 --> 00:09:06,333 ME, DROP OUT? 376 00:09:06,333 --> 00:09:08,300 I WOULD NOT DO THAT TO YOU. 377 00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:09,733 [ LAUGHS ] 378 00:09:09,733 --> 00:09:11,467 I JUST NEVER DROPPED IN. 379 00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:13,233 SO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH 380 00:09:13,233 --> 00:09:14,400 ALL THE MONEY WE SENT YOU? 381 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:16,167 OH, IT'S STILL IN MY CLOSET. 382 00:09:16,167 --> 00:09:17,800 DANA, YOU'RE KEEPING MONEY IN 383 00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:19,333 YOUR CLOSET? 384 00:09:19,333 --> 00:09:21,100 NO, MY SHOES. 385 00:09:21,100 --> 00:09:22,233 AAH! 386 00:09:22,233 --> 00:09:24,067 [ SPEAKING KOREAN ] 387 00:09:24,067 --> 00:09:25,833 WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. 388 00:09:25,833 --> 00:09:27,367 I HEARD "NEGRO," "FLOYD," AND 389 00:09:27,367 --> 00:09:28,500 "HO." 390 00:09:28,500 --> 00:09:30,867 YOUNG LADY, YOU HAVE REALLY 391 00:09:30,867 --> 00:09:33,167 LET YOUR FATHER DOWN THIS TIME. 392 00:09:33,167 --> 00:09:34,833 DANA, I'M SO DISAPPOINTED IN 393 00:09:34,833 --> 00:09:35,767 YOU! 394 00:09:35,767 --> 00:09:39,200 [ SIGHS ] 395 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:40,633 CURTIS, HURRY UP! 396 00:09:40,633 --> 00:09:42,067 YEAH, COME ON, UNCLE CURTIS. 397 00:09:42,067 --> 00:09:43,400 YOU'RE GONNA MAKE US LATE. 398 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:44,467 I'M COMING, I'M COMING, 399 00:09:44,467 --> 00:09:45,467 I'M COMING, I'M COMING. 400 00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:46,733 OKAY. 401 00:09:46,733 --> 00:09:48,433 ARRIBA, ARRIBA, ARRIBA! 402 00:09:48,433 --> 00:09:50,700 GOL! 403 00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:51,433 [ LAUGHS ] 404 00:09:51,433 --> 00:09:53,500 WHAT THE? 405 00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:56,833 CURTIS, YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS! 406 00:09:56,833 --> 00:09:57,833 YEAH, UNCLE CURTIS. 407 00:09:57,833 --> 00:09:58,933 YOU'RE GONNA EMBARRASS ME IN 408 00:09:58,933 --> 00:09:59,733 FRONT OF ALEXANDRA. 409 00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:00,367 OH, PLEASE. 410 00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:01,200 Y'ALL JUST JEALOUS. 411 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:02,633 Y'ALL WAY UNDERDRESSED. 412 00:10:02,633 --> 00:10:04,133 WHEN IN ROME, DRESS LIKE A 413 00:10:04,133 --> 00:10:04,767 MEXICAN. 414 00:10:04,767 --> 00:10:06,200 COME ON, LET'S EAT SOME MEXICAN 415 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:06,600 FOOD. 416 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:07,867 COME ON, PABLO, KNOCK ON THE 417 00:10:07,867 --> 00:10:14,367 DOOR. 418 00:10:14,367 --> 00:10:15,767 HELLO. 419 00:10:15,767 --> 00:10:17,500 WELCOME TO OUR HOME. 420 00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:19,900 OH, THIS IS BEAUTIFUL! 421 00:10:19,900 --> 00:10:21,700 [ WHOOPS ] 422 00:10:21,700 --> 00:10:24,200 [ HUMMING ] 423 00:10:31,433 --> 00:10:33,667 WHAT UP, MY PEOPLE? 424 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:36,433 AH-OOGLA-OOGLA-OOGLA-OOGLA! 425 00:10:36,433 --> 00:10:38,533 WHAT THE HELL? 426 00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:44,367 WHAT THE HELL DO YOU HAVE ON? 427 00:10:44,367 --> 00:10:45,767 WHAT THE HELL DO YOU HAVE ON? 428 00:10:45,767 --> 00:10:46,967 WE DON'T DRESS LIKE THAT. 429 00:10:46,967 --> 00:10:48,967 AND WE DON'T DRESS LIKE THAT! 430 00:10:48,967 --> 00:10:50,533 EVERYONE, THE PAYNES ARE 431 00:10:50,533 --> 00:10:51,000 HERE. 432 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:54,333 YEAH, YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN. 433 00:10:54,333 --> 00:10:55,667 [ GASPS ] 434 00:10:55,667 --> 00:10:57,467 All: WHAT THE HELL? 435 00:10:57,467 --> 00:10:59,000 YEAH, WHAT THEY SAID. 436 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:00,900 I'M SORRY FOR THE WAY CURTIS 437 00:11:00,900 --> 00:11:01,667 IS DRESSED. 438 00:11:01,667 --> 00:11:02,433 I'M SORRY. 439 00:11:02,433 --> 00:11:04,367 NOT AS SORRY AS I AM FOR WHAT 440 00:11:04,367 --> 00:11:06,100 CARLOS IS WEARING. 441 00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:08,067 ELLA, MALIK, CURTIS, I'D LIKE 442 00:11:08,067 --> 00:11:10,300 YOU MEET DIEGO, OUR SON. 443 00:11:10,300 --> 00:11:11,567 NICE TO MEET YOU GUYS. 444 00:11:11,567 --> 00:11:14,333 GRACIAS. 445 00:11:14,333 --> 00:11:15,267 I THINK. 446 00:11:15,267 --> 00:11:16,267 DIEGO? 447 00:11:16,267 --> 00:11:17,200 WHAT? 448 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:18,700 OH, YEAH, DIEGO, STAND UP 449 00:11:18,700 --> 00:11:19,333 STRAIGHT. 450 00:11:19,333 --> 00:11:20,633 FIRST IMPRESSIONS ARE 451 00:11:20,633 --> 00:11:21,400 EVERYTHING. 452 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:24,100 LOOK WHO'S TALKING. 453 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,100 WHAT? 454 00:11:25,100 --> 00:11:28,767 I'M A SOUL MAN. 455 00:11:28,767 --> 00:11:30,067 HEY, THAT'S A PICTURE OF 456 00:11:30,067 --> 00:11:30,700 MALCOLM X. 457 00:11:30,700 --> 00:11:31,600 IT'S PRETTY COOL. 458 00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:32,600 OF COURSE. 459 00:11:32,600 --> 00:11:34,500 SEE, ROSIE, I TOLD YOU THEY'D 460 00:11:34,500 --> 00:11:36,100 NOTICE. 461 00:11:36,100 --> 00:11:37,833 DIEGO, PLEASE TAKE ELLA'S 462 00:11:37,833 --> 00:11:38,333 DISH. 463 00:11:38,333 --> 00:11:39,400 TAKE IT WHERE? 464 00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:40,600 TO THE KITCHEN. 465 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:41,767 AND SET THE TABLE. 466 00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:42,633 OKAY, MOM. 467 00:11:42,633 --> 00:11:43,767 IT SMELLS GOOD. 468 00:11:43,767 --> 00:11:45,067 WHAT DID YOU BRING US? 469 00:11:45,067 --> 00:11:46,667 OH, ELLA MADE ALL YOUR 470 00:11:46,667 --> 00:11:48,333 FAVORITE STUFF -- ENCHILADAS, 471 00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:50,167 TOSTADAS, CHICKEN QUESADILLAS, 472 00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:51,500 CHICKEN RELLENO, CHILI 473 00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:52,233 RELLENO -- 474 00:11:52,233 --> 00:11:53,567 CURTIS. 475 00:11:53,567 --> 00:11:54,767 ...CHILI CON... 476 00:11:54,767 --> 00:11:59,667 WHAT -- NO TACOS? 477 00:11:59,667 --> 00:12:01,233 OKAY. 478 00:12:01,233 --> 00:12:02,633 WHY IS THE OLD LADY STARING AT 479 00:12:02,633 --> 00:12:04,467 ME? 480 00:12:04,467 --> 00:12:09,933 ¿MAMA, QUE TE PASA? 481 00:12:09,933 --> 00:12:11,767 SHE SAYS YOU REMIND HER OF 482 00:12:11,767 --> 00:12:13,367 HER SECOND HUSBAND HECTOR. 483 00:12:13,367 --> 00:12:14,500 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 484 00:12:14,500 --> 00:12:16,267 IS THAT A GOOD THING OR A BAD 485 00:12:16,267 --> 00:12:16,800 THING? 486 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,700 VERY BAD. SHE KILLED HIM. 487 00:12:18,700 --> 00:12:19,933 NO PROOF! 488 00:12:19,933 --> 00:12:21,300 OKAY. 489 00:12:21,300 --> 00:12:22,933 WELL, ROSIE, WHAT DID YOU ALL 490 00:12:22,933 --> 00:12:23,933 PREPARE FOR US? 491 00:12:23,933 --> 00:12:24,700 AY! 492 00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:27,067 DIEGO [ SPEAKS SPANISH ] 493 00:12:27,067 --> 00:12:29,700 [ SPEAKS SPANISH ] 494 00:12:29,700 --> 00:12:31,300 WE HOPE YOU LIKE IT. 495 00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:33,400 WE MADE ALL YOUR FAVORITES -- 496 00:12:33,400 --> 00:12:36,167 FRIED CHICKEN, COLLARD GREENS, 497 00:12:36,167 --> 00:12:40,400 MAC AND CHEESE, AND WATERMELON! 498 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:42,967 SEEDLESS. 499 00:12:42,967 --> 00:12:43,700 DON'T, DON'T. 500 00:12:43,700 --> 00:12:44,900 DID YOU HEAR WHAT HE SAID? 501 00:12:44,900 --> 00:12:45,700 YES -- SEEDLESS. 502 00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:46,833 WHAT'S WITH THE WATERMELON, 503 00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:47,167 ELLA? 504 00:12:47,167 --> 00:12:48,433 [ SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY ] 505 00:12:48,433 --> 00:12:49,200 EXCUSE ME. 506 00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:50,800 SO, WHY WOULD YOU ASSUME WE LIKE 507 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:51,433 WATERMELON? 508 00:12:51,433 --> 00:12:52,900 YOU DO, DON'T YOU? 509 00:12:52,900 --> 00:12:54,333 HELL, YEAH, WE DO, BUT THAT'S 510 00:12:54,333 --> 00:12:55,700 BESIDE THE POINT. 511 00:12:55,700 --> 00:12:57,867 OH. 512 00:12:57,867 --> 00:13:00,100 AND THE CHICKEN LOOKS GREASY. 513 00:13:00,100 --> 00:13:03,067 THE ONLY THINGS I LIKE GREASY 514 00:13:03,067 --> 00:13:05,267 ARE MY MEN. 515 00:13:05,267 --> 00:13:07,533 WHY IS SHE RUBBING MY BELLY? 516 00:13:07,533 --> 00:13:10,900 BECAUSE FAT MEAT IS GREASY. 517 00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:12,500 GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME. 518 00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:14,067 MAMA, SIENTATE, POR FAVOR. 519 00:13:14,067 --> 00:13:15,333 TRANQUILA. 520 00:13:15,333 --> 00:13:16,767 ¿POR QUE? 521 00:13:16,767 --> 00:13:19,700 SO, WHAT SHALL WE DO? 522 00:13:19,700 --> 00:13:21,400 ANYBODY FEEL LIKE CHINESE? 523 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:22,900 YES. 524 00:13:22,900 --> 00:13:23,767 CHINESE IT IS. 525 00:13:23,767 --> 00:13:25,400 ALL RIGHT. 526 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:28,100 THANK YOU. 527 00:13:28,100 --> 00:13:29,067 OH. 528 00:13:29,067 --> 00:13:30,667 IT'S KRISTI YAMAGUCHI, 529 00:13:30,667 --> 00:13:33,700 PAM "FOXY BROWN" GRIER, 530 00:13:33,700 --> 00:13:35,333 AND TIGER-TIGER WOODS, Y'ALL. 531 00:13:35,333 --> 00:13:37,333 HA HA! 532 00:13:37,333 --> 00:13:39,133 GO ON. TELL HIM. 533 00:13:39,133 --> 00:13:41,900 FLOYD, I HAVE TO QUIT. 534 00:13:41,900 --> 00:13:42,433 NO! 535 00:13:42,433 --> 00:13:43,867 WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GO DO 536 00:13:43,867 --> 00:13:45,067 SOMETHING LIKE THAT? 537 00:13:45,067 --> 00:13:46,967 FINE, FINE, FINE. 538 00:13:46,967 --> 00:13:49,100 BUT CAN YOUR MAMA STAY? 539 00:13:49,100 --> 00:13:50,767 DR. CARTER. 540 00:13:50,767 --> 00:13:52,367 WHY SHE GOTTA LEAVE, YO? 541 00:13:52,367 --> 00:13:53,767 I DON'T WANT MY DAUGHTER 542 00:13:53,767 --> 00:13:55,100 WORKING IN A DUMP LIKE THIS. 543 00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:56,067 HEY, HEY, HEY. 544 00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:57,067 HOLD UP, NOW, DOC. 545 00:13:57,067 --> 00:13:59,133 NOW, JUST 'CAUSE YOU GOT YOUR 546 00:13:59,133 --> 00:14:01,267 FANCY HARVARD DEGREE AND YOUR 547 00:14:01,267 --> 00:14:03,500 BIG SURGERY JOB AND EVERYTHING 548 00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:07,600 AND YOUR FINE WIFE... 549 00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,467 AND JUST BECAUSE YOU GOT THE BIG 550 00:14:09,467 --> 00:14:11,200 MANSION WITH ALL THE SERVANTS 551 00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:12,733 AND EVERYTHING, AND DID I 552 00:14:12,733 --> 00:14:16,233 MENTION YOUR FINE WIFE? 553 00:14:16,233 --> 00:14:17,967 DON'T MEAN YOU CAN CALL MY PLACE 554 00:14:17,967 --> 00:14:19,067 A DUMP, NOW. 555 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:19,867 HELL. 556 00:14:19,867 --> 00:14:22,600 ALL RIGHT, DANA, LET'S GO. 557 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:23,700 COME ON, HONEY. 558 00:14:23,700 --> 00:14:25,133 DANA, YOU'RE A GROWN WOMAN. 559 00:14:25,133 --> 00:14:26,567 YOU DON'T NEED YOUR PARENTS 560 00:14:26,567 --> 00:14:27,633 APPROVAL FOR NOTHING. 561 00:14:27,633 --> 00:14:28,967 I MEAN, LOOK AT ME. 562 00:14:28,967 --> 00:14:30,400 I AIN'T EVEN GOT NO DADDY. 563 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:31,300 I'M A'IGHT. 564 00:14:31,300 --> 00:14:32,633 DON'T LOOK AT HER. COME ON. 565 00:14:32,633 --> 00:14:34,533 GO WITH YOUR DADDY. 566 00:14:34,533 --> 00:14:35,200 GO WITH YOUR DADDY. 567 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:36,533 DANA, DANA... 568 00:14:36,533 --> 00:14:37,533 DON'T LISTEN TO HER. 569 00:14:37,533 --> 00:14:38,733 YOU TURN AROUND, YOU'RE GONNA 570 00:14:38,733 --> 00:14:39,833 TURN INTO A PILLAR OF SALT. 571 00:14:39,833 --> 00:14:40,500 DANA! 572 00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:41,967 DON'T DO IT! 573 00:14:41,967 --> 00:14:42,800 [ CHUCKLES ] 574 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:43,967 I GOT IT MADE, THOUGH. 575 00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:45,100 YOU'RE A FUNNY GUY. 576 00:14:45,100 --> 00:14:46,433 [ LAUGHS ] 577 00:14:46,433 --> 00:14:47,367 NO, PLEASE, EXCUSE ME. 578 00:14:47,367 --> 00:14:48,300 PLEASE, SIT OVER THERE. 579 00:14:48,300 --> 00:14:49,133 WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? 580 00:14:49,133 --> 00:14:52,633 THAT'S MY SEAT. 581 00:14:52,633 --> 00:14:54,533 SO, IS IT TRUE THAT NOT ALL 582 00:14:54,533 --> 00:14:56,133 BLACK PEOPLE CAN PLAY 583 00:14:56,133 --> 00:14:57,067 BASKETBALL? 584 00:14:57,067 --> 00:14:58,067 YOU KNOW HOW THEY CALL 585 00:14:58,067 --> 00:14:59,100 ALLEN IVERSON "THE ANSWER"? 586 00:14:59,100 --> 00:15:00,067 YEAH. 587 00:15:00,067 --> 00:15:01,367 MALIK'S THE QUESTION. 588 00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:03,167 [ LAUGHTER ] 589 00:15:03,167 --> 00:15:04,067 BRO, SERIOUSLY. 590 00:15:04,067 --> 00:15:05,300 HEY, YOU MISSED THE PIÑATA BY A 591 00:15:05,300 --> 00:15:06,367 WHOLE FOOT. 592 00:15:06,367 --> 00:15:08,400 AND HE WASN'T EVEN BLINDFOLDED. 593 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:10,667 TRUE, TRUE. 594 00:15:10,667 --> 00:15:14,300 OH, SO, IS EVERYBODY LEGAL? 595 00:15:14,300 --> 00:15:15,600 WHAT DID YOU SAY? 596 00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:16,733 I'M WORKING ON IT. 597 00:15:16,733 --> 00:15:18,333 MM-HMM. [ HICCUPS ] 598 00:15:18,333 --> 00:15:19,433 CURTIS. 599 00:15:19,433 --> 00:15:20,567 WHAT? 600 00:15:20,567 --> 00:15:22,100 LEGAL? I'M FROM NEW JERSEY. 601 00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:24,733 [ SCOFFS ] YEAH, RIGHT. 602 00:15:24,733 --> 00:15:26,900 ALL RIGHT, SO IS IT TRUE THAT 603 00:15:26,900 --> 00:15:28,533 Y'ALL ARE ALWAYS LATE TO 604 00:15:28,533 --> 00:15:29,667 EVERYTHING? 605 00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,933 WELL, NO, WE'RE NOT LATE 606 00:15:31,933 --> 00:15:32,900 TO EVERYTHING. 607 00:15:32,900 --> 00:15:34,633 WE'RE ONLY LATE WHEN WE HAVE TO 608 00:15:34,633 --> 00:15:36,367 BE A CERTAIN PLACE AT A CERTAIN 609 00:15:36,367 --> 00:15:39,100 TIME, SO... 610 00:15:39,100 --> 00:15:40,833 HEY, DO YOU GUYS GET FOLLOWED 611 00:15:40,833 --> 00:15:42,367 AROUND IN DEPARTMENT STORES BY 612 00:15:42,367 --> 00:15:42,967 SALESMEN? 613 00:15:42,967 --> 00:15:43,967 Both: [ SCOFF ] 614 00:15:43,967 --> 00:15:45,533 ALL THE TIME. 615 00:15:45,533 --> 00:15:47,800 All: SO DO WE! 616 00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:48,933 OH, I GOT ONE -- WHEN YOU 617 00:15:48,933 --> 00:15:50,200 GUYS GO TO RESTAURANTS, DO YOU 618 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:51,300 GUYS GET BAD SERVICE BECAUSE 619 00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:52,433 PEOPLE THINK YOU'RE NOT GONNA 620 00:15:52,433 --> 00:15:53,067 LEAVE A TIP? 621 00:15:53,067 --> 00:15:54,067 I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU. 622 00:15:54,067 --> 00:15:54,967 NO. 623 00:15:54,967 --> 00:15:55,600 NO, NO, NO. 624 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:57,067 WE GET BAD SERVICE BECAUSE THEY 625 00:15:57,067 --> 00:15:58,433 NOW CURTIS IS NOT GONNA LEAVE K 626 00:15:58,433 --> 00:15:58,867 A TIP. 627 00:15:58,867 --> 00:16:00,333 I LOVE IT! 628 00:16:00,333 --> 00:16:01,700 [ LAUGHTER ] 629 00:16:01,700 --> 00:16:03,467 DO ANY OF YOU LIKE TO GET 630 00:16:03,467 --> 00:16:04,800 NAKED AND WANDER THROUGH THE 631 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:05,667 STREETS AT NIGHT? 632 00:16:05,667 --> 00:16:06,267 ABUELA. 633 00:16:06,267 --> 00:16:06,967 ABUELA! 634 00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,300 MERCEDES, TAKE THE BEER. 635 00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:09,067 AH, PAPA. 636 00:16:09,067 --> 00:16:10,133 GRACIAS, ABUELITA. 637 00:16:10,133 --> 00:16:10,933 I LOVE YOU. 638 00:16:10,933 --> 00:16:11,700 GOOD NIGHT. 639 00:16:11,700 --> 00:16:12,800 SHE LIKE TO DRINK. 640 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:14,367 SOUNDS LIKE SHE LIKES TO DO 641 00:16:14,367 --> 00:16:17,833 A LOT MORE THAN THAT. 642 00:16:17,833 --> 00:16:21,067 EXCUSE ME, YOU'RE SO RIGHT. 643 00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:22,533 THE GRANDMA THE RA-RA. 644 00:16:22,533 --> 00:16:24,500 [ LAUGHTER ] 645 00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:25,533 SHE SURE IS THE RA-RA. 646 00:16:25,533 --> 00:16:26,867 SO IT SEEMS LIKE WE ALL HAVE 647 00:16:26,867 --> 00:16:28,467 A LOT MORE IN COMMON THAN 648 00:16:28,467 --> 00:16:29,300 WE THOUGHT, HUH? 649 00:16:29,300 --> 00:16:30,233 WE DO. WE DO. 650 00:16:30,233 --> 00:16:32,200 YOU KNOW, THIS WHOLE THING 651 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,333 TURNED OUT BETTER THAN I 652 00:16:33,333 --> 00:16:34,067 EXPECTED. 653 00:16:34,067 --> 00:16:34,800 ME, TOO. 654 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:35,833 ME, TOO, CARLOS. 655 00:16:35,833 --> 00:16:37,400 CURTIS, HEY, HOW ABOUT A 656 00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:38,933 CERVEZA NEGRA, HUH? 657 00:16:38,933 --> 00:16:40,567 CURTIS, WAIT! 658 00:16:47,133 --> 00:16:48,067 YOU GUYS DON'T UNDERSTAND 659 00:16:48,067 --> 00:16:49,067 THAT IF I DON'T MOVE BACK TO 660 00:16:49,067 --> 00:16:50,067 BOSTON WITH HIM, THEN HE'S GONNA 661 00:16:50,067 --> 00:16:50,800 CUT MY ALLOWANCE OFF. 662 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:52,067 WELL, DANA, YOU'VE JUST 663 00:16:52,067 --> 00:16:53,400 GOT TO GET YOUR HUSTLE ON, MA. 664 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:54,533 I MEAN, THERE'S GOT TO BE 665 00:16:54,533 --> 00:16:55,867 SOMETHING ELSE YOU'RE GOOD AT. 666 00:16:55,867 --> 00:16:57,300 I DON'T KNOW. TAKING PICTURES. 667 00:16:57,300 --> 00:16:58,733 YOU COULD WORK IN AN ELECTRONIC 668 00:16:58,733 --> 00:17:00,367 STORE, BE A MATH TUTOR. 669 00:17:00,367 --> 00:17:04,167 SELL DVDs, CDs, WIGS, WEAVES. 670 00:17:04,167 --> 00:17:05,133 OH -- DRY CLEANING. 671 00:17:05,133 --> 00:17:05,900 DRY CLEANING. 672 00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:06,667 YOU KNOW THAT. 673 00:17:06,667 --> 00:17:07,767 YOU KNOW SHE CAN DO DRY 674 00:17:07,767 --> 00:17:08,200 CLEANING. 675 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:09,533 CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, 676 00:17:09,533 --> 00:17:10,667 ALL ASIANS DON'T DO THOSE 677 00:17:10,667 --> 00:17:11,100 THINGS. 678 00:17:11,100 --> 00:17:12,700 Both: PSH! 679 00:17:12,700 --> 00:17:14,433 WELL, NOT ALL ASIANS. 680 00:17:14,433 --> 00:17:15,467 Both: PSH! 681 00:17:15,467 --> 00:17:16,333 WELL, NOT ME. 682 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:17,600 I DON'T KNOW JACK ABOUT 683 00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:19,833 FRACTIONS. 684 00:17:19,833 --> 00:17:20,967 DANA, YOU JUST GOT TO BE 685 00:17:20,967 --> 00:17:22,067 STRONG, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M 686 00:17:22,067 --> 00:17:22,433 SAYING? 687 00:17:22,433 --> 00:17:22,833 MAN UP! 688 00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:23,733 OW! 689 00:17:23,733 --> 00:17:25,300 STOP IT! SUCK IT UP! 690 00:17:25,300 --> 00:17:26,533 STAND UP TO YOUR DADDY, YOU KNOW 691 00:17:26,533 --> 00:17:27,200 WHAT I'M SAYING? 692 00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:28,333 TELL HIM WHAT YOU AIN'T GONNA 693 00:17:28,333 --> 00:17:29,200 DO, WHAT YOU GONNA DO. 694 00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:29,667 RIGHT. 695 00:17:29,667 --> 00:17:30,933 WHEN YOU GONNA DO IT, HOW YOU 696 00:17:30,933 --> 00:17:32,133 GONNA DO IT, WHERE YOU GONNA DO 697 00:17:32,133 --> 00:17:32,433 IT. 698 00:17:32,433 --> 00:17:33,467 HE'S NOT THE BOSS OF ME, 699 00:17:33,467 --> 00:17:33,833 RIGHT? 700 00:17:33,833 --> 00:17:34,900 I'M THE BOSS OF ME! 701 00:17:34,900 --> 00:17:35,467 YEAH! 702 00:17:35,467 --> 00:17:36,667 HERE THEY COME NOW. 703 00:17:36,667 --> 00:17:37,733 WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? 704 00:17:37,733 --> 00:17:38,867 MY PARENTS ARE HERE?! 705 00:17:38,867 --> 00:17:40,167 DON'T START THAT. 706 00:17:40,167 --> 00:17:41,967 HIT THE POSE, HIT THE POSE. 707 00:17:41,967 --> 00:17:42,767 HIT THE POSE. 708 00:17:42,767 --> 00:17:43,667 ROCK WITH IT. 709 00:17:43,667 --> 00:17:44,567 LEAN WITH IT. 710 00:17:44,567 --> 00:17:47,633 ROCK WITH IT. 711 00:17:47,633 --> 00:17:48,767 DANA, WE'RE GOING TO THE 712 00:17:48,767 --> 00:17:49,300 AIRPORT. 713 00:17:49,300 --> 00:17:50,500 YOUR FATHER WANTS YOU TO COME 714 00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:50,967 WITH US. 715 00:17:50,967 --> 00:17:51,867 PSH! 716 00:17:51,867 --> 00:17:53,400 [ LAUGHS ] 717 00:17:53,400 --> 00:17:55,833 WHAT THAT GOTTA DO WITH ME, YO? 718 00:17:55,833 --> 00:17:56,867 'CAUSE GUESS WHAT? 719 00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:58,133 I AIN'T GOING NOWHERE. 720 00:17:58,133 --> 00:17:58,900 YEAH, YEAH. 721 00:17:58,900 --> 00:18:00,067 [ BEAT-BOXING ] 722 00:18:00,067 --> 00:18:01,067 I'M-A STAY HERE. 723 00:18:01,067 --> 00:18:01,700 YEAH, YEAH. 724 00:18:01,700 --> 00:18:02,900 * 'CAUSE I'M GONNA DO WHAT I 725 00:18:02,900 --> 00:18:03,833 DO * 726 00:18:03,833 --> 00:18:04,867 * AND I AIN'T GOING BACK TO 727 00:18:04,867 --> 00:18:05,900 SCHOOL * 728 00:18:05,900 --> 00:18:07,633 YEAH, SO WHAT'S UP? YEAH. 729 00:18:07,633 --> 00:18:09,167 UH! THAT'S MY CUT. 730 00:18:09,167 --> 00:18:10,567 FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHAKE 731 00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:11,900 SOMEBODY UP IN THIS -- 732 00:18:11,900 --> 00:18:12,667 ENOUGH! 733 00:18:12,667 --> 00:18:14,533 IF YOU DO THIS, I'M CUTTING OFF 734 00:18:14,533 --> 00:18:15,700 YOUR ALLOWANCE. 735 00:18:15,700 --> 00:18:16,800 HUH? 736 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:18,067 OKAY, KIKI GIRL, THAT'S MY 737 00:18:18,067 --> 00:18:18,400 MONEY. 738 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:19,767 THAT'S MESSING WITH MY SHOES. 739 00:18:19,767 --> 00:18:20,567 BRING IT IN. 740 00:18:20,567 --> 00:18:21,300 OKAY, OKAY. 741 00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:23,267 YOU RIGHT, YOU RIGHT. 742 00:18:23,267 --> 00:18:24,567 [ WHIMPERS ] FOR REAL? 743 00:18:24,567 --> 00:18:26,200 HIT THE POSE, HIT THE POSE. 744 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:27,567 PSH. 745 00:18:27,567 --> 00:18:28,833 AND? SO WHAT? 746 00:18:28,833 --> 00:18:29,200 PSH! 747 00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:30,400 YOU CAN KEEP ALL YOUR DOUGH. 748 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:31,633 SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN GET BACK 749 00:18:31,633 --> 00:18:32,833 ON THAT PLANE AND CAN BOUNCE 750 00:18:32,833 --> 00:18:34,267 WITH ALL THAT -- ALL THAT MONEY? 751 00:18:34,267 --> 00:18:34,800 MONEY. 752 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:37,167 OH, BOUNCE, MONEY. YEAH. 753 00:18:37,167 --> 00:18:38,433 DON'T STAT THAT CUSSING 754 00:18:38,433 --> 00:18:42,833 AGAIN. 755 00:18:42,833 --> 00:18:45,867 WELL...YOU FINALLY ASSERT 756 00:18:45,867 --> 00:18:47,700 YOURSELF. 757 00:18:47,700 --> 00:18:48,633 WELL, DON'T WORRY, HONEY, 758 00:18:48,633 --> 00:18:50,067 'CAUSE I WRITE THE CHECKS. 759 00:18:50,067 --> 00:18:51,867 BUT THAT WAS SLICK, YO! 760 00:18:51,867 --> 00:18:53,067 [ LAUGHS ] 761 00:18:53,067 --> 00:18:54,367 WORD! 762 00:18:54,367 --> 00:18:56,900 UH...IT'S A CELEBRATION! 763 00:18:56,900 --> 00:18:57,367 [ LAUGHS ] 764 00:18:57,367 --> 00:18:58,900 FLOYD. 765 00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:02,700 FLOYD! 766 00:19:02,700 --> 00:19:04,700 BYE, MOM. 767 00:19:04,700 --> 00:19:06,967 I WAS THAT CLOSE TO BEING 768 00:19:06,967 --> 00:19:09,333 YOUR STEPFATHER. 45277

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