Original subtitles

Ella: LUNCH IS SERVED.

Curtis: GOOD, GOOD, GOOD,

GOOD, GOOD.

CALVIN, PASS ME THE KETCHUP,

PLEASE.

AND THE MAYO.

BRING ME YOUR PLATE.

BABY, GIVE ME A PIECE OF

FOIL, PLEASE.

Calvin: HOOK IT UP.

Curtis: YEAH.

Ella: HERE, BABE.

Calvin: POP, CAN I GET A

WHOLE PIECE?

Curtis: YOU HAVE A HOME,

RIGHT?

GO THERE AND EAT.

Calvin: THAT'S COLD, POPS.

Curtis: NOT AS COLD AS YOUR

FOOD GONNA GET.

Ella: C.J., JANINE, DID YOU

GUYS SEE THIS?

THIS LETTER CAME ADDRESSED TO

THE BOTH OF YOU.

Janine: OH, IT'S AN

INVITATION TO MELISSA AND

MARCUS' 10th-ANNIVERSARY PARTY.

C.J.: OBVIOUSLY, OUR

FRIENDS DON'T KNOW WE'RE

DIVORCED.

Ella: SO ARE YOU GOING?

C.J.: YEAH, WELL, I MEAN,

THEY ARE OUR FRIENDS, SO...

NOT TOGETHER.

WE DON'T WANT TO GIVE THEM THE

WRONG IMPRESSION.

Janine: I AGREE.

Curtis: PEOPLE WILL BE

CONVINCED YOU'RE NOT TOGETHER IF

ONE OF YOU MOVED OUT, JANINE.

Ella: OK, YOU GUYS, IT IS

ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS FOR YOU

TO GO SEPARATELY.

YOU'RE GOING TO THE SAME HOUSE,

LEAVING FROM THE SAME HOUSE...

Calvin: GAS IS HIGH.

Malik: HEY, YOU COULD TAKE

THE SAME CAR AND YOU CAN HELP

THE ENVIRONMENT, TOO.

Janine: I GUESS IT WOULDN'T

HURT.

C.J.: YEAH, I MEAN, WE KNOW

THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON, SO...

Janine: RIGHT.

C.J.: YEAH. LET'S DO IT.

Jazmine: YES. MOMMY AND DADDY

ARE GOING ON A DATE.

C.J.: IT'S NOT A DATE.

Janine: WE'RE JUST GOING TO

THE SAME PARTY.

Ella: IN THE SAME CAR.

Curtis: TOGETHER.

All: DATE.

[ SIREN WAILS ]

[ SIREN WAILS ] [ TIRES SCREECH ]

[ TIRES SCREECH ]

C.J.: HEY, MAN, I HAVE NOT

LOOKED AT THIS THING IN A LONG

TIME. LOOK AT THIS PHOTO ALBUM.

YOU KNOW, MARCUS AND MELISSA

WOULDN'T HAVE NEVER EVEN MET IF

YOU HADN'T HAVE ASKED HER TO BE

YOUR BRIDESMAID AND I DIDN'T ASK

MARCUS TO BE MY GROOMSMAN.

Janine: LOOK AT THEM.

OH, TALK ABOUT LOVE AT FIRST

SIGHT.

IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW ANY BETTER,

YOU'D THINK THEY WERE THE ONES

GETTING MARRIED.

Curtis: NO, EVERYBODY KNEW IT

WAS YOU TWO GETTING MARRIED.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, THAT'S THE

FIRST TIME I EVER SEEN A BEIGE

MATERNITY WEDDING DRESS.

Ella: [ LAUGHS ]

DON'T FORGET, THEY WERE

REGISTERED AT TOTS 'R' US.

C.J.: YEAH, EVERYBODY KNEW

THAT SHE WAS PREGNANT.

EVERYBODY.

THAT'S WHY WE HAD TO PUT

"STARTING A FAMILY" IN OUR VOWS.

Curtis: I BET IF YOU HAD

KNOWN WHAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN, YOU

COULD HAVE ADDED "UNTIL CRACK DO

US PART.

AMEN."

Janine: THOSE ARE NICE

PICTURES.

OH, LOOK, C.J., YOU LOOK SO

NERVOUS.

LOOK, YOUR TUX IS SOAKED.

C.J.: THAT'S NOT SWEAT.

Janine: YES, IT IS.

WHAT IS IT?

C.J.: NO, IT AIN'T.

YOUR DRUNK AUNTIE THREW

CHAMPAGNE ALL OVER ME INSTEAD OF

RICE.

Ella: I REMEMBER THAT.

SO WHAT ARE YOU GUYS GONNA GET

MARCUS AND MELISSA?

Janine: I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, THEY PRACTICALLY HAVE

EVERYTHING THEY NEED ALREADY.

C.J.: YEAH, I WAS THINKING

ABOUT GETTING THEM SOME THEATER

TICKETS.

Janine: THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.

Curtis: WHAT? BOO!

I GOT 3 WORDS FOR YOU -- D.V.D.

Ella: OK, GIFTS DON'T HAVE TO

BE EXPENSIVE, RIGHT?

SO A THOUGHTFUL GIFT IS JUST

SOMETHING THAT THEY CAN USE.

Curtis: I GOT IT. I GOT IT.

I GOT IT. I GOT IT.

IT'S AMAZING HOW IT JUST COMES

IN MY HEAD, JUST STUFF OUT OF

NOWHERE.

IT'S LIKE GOD JUST PUT IT ON ME.

♪ AHHH ♪

C.J.: ♪ AHHH ♪

A BAG OF ICE?

Curtis: THAT'S NOT JUST A BAG

OF ICE, C.J.

OPEN YOUR EYES.

SEE THE HORIZON, MAN.

PUT IT ON A BRUISE, IT'S AN ICE

PACK.

SMASH IT UP, PUT SOME KOOL-AID

ON IT -- GRAPE, STRAWBERRY, RED,

WHATEVER YOU LIKE -- SNOW CONE.

YOU LET IT MELT, IT'S FRESH

WATER -- THAT COOL, REFRESHING

DRINK.

I SAY, PUT A BOW ON IT, AND...

♪ GIVE THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON

♪ GIVE THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING ♪

GIVING ♪

COME ON, FIREFIGHTERS.

LET'S GO, FIREFIGHTERS.

AND STOP.

I SAID, STOP.

SPOT, SPOT, SPOT.

Angel: CHIEF, MINE'S GOOD.

Curtis: SPOT, SPOT.

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.

HOLD ON. HOLD ON. HOLD ON.

WHAT ARE YOU TWO THIEVING THUGS

DOING -- HIDING FROM THE POLICE?

Pookie: AH, COME ON,

MR. PAYNE.

AIN'T NOBODY HIDING FROM NO

POLICE.

Peanut: YEAH, WE LIKE TO CALL

IT "AVOIDING JAIL TIME."

WE'RE TRYING TO DO SOMETHING

POSITIVE HERE.

Calvin: POPS, POOKIE AND

PEANUT GOT TO DO COMMUNITY

SERVICE.

SO I TOLD THEM TO COMPLETE THEIR

HOURS, THEY COULD VOLUNTEER

HERE.

Curtis: AND WHY WOULD YOU LIE

TO YOUR FRIENDS LIKE THAT?

Calvin: IT'S NOT LYING IF YOU

LET THEM VOLUNTEER.

Curtis: I WANT TO KNOW

EXACTLY WHAT "BOYZ" IN THE HOOD

DID TO GET COMMUNITY SERVICE.

Pookie: NAH, YOU DON'T WANT

TO KNOW.

Peanut: NO. YOU DON'T NEED TO

KNOW THAT, AS A MATTER OF FACT.

DANG. WHO THE SHORTY IS, THOUGH?

I DIDN'T EVEN

NOTICE YOU WHEN I CAME IN.

Angel: THE NAME IS ANGEL.

Peanut: ANGEL? YOU THE FIRST

ANGEL I EVER MET.

Curtis: AND SHE WILL BE YOUR

LAST.

I'LL DO ANYTHING TO GET PETE AND

REPEAT OUT OF HERE.

Pookie: THAT'S WHAT I'M

TALKING ABOUT.

SIGN RIGHT HERE.

Angel: WAIT.

ACTUALLY, CHIEF, WAIT, WAIT.

DON'T SIGN IT YET.

SINCE BART AND KEENAN ARE OUT

FOR THE DAY, MAYBE WE COULD USE

AN EXTRA PAIR OF HANDS.

I MEAN, IT COULD GET BUSY.

WHO KNOWS?

Peanut: YEAH. OR, YOU KNOW,

WE CAN GET BUSY.

Angel: [YELLING IN SPANISH]

Calvin: ANGEL, ANGEL.

Peanut: WHAT IT IS.

I LOVE YOU, TOO, SHORTY.

I LOVE YOU, TOO, SHORTY. I LIKE THAT PASSION.

I LIKE THAT PASSION.

Ella: OH!

YOU TWO JUST OUT TOGETHER.

♪ TOGETHER ♪

Janine: WE WENT SHOPPING

TOGETHER.

THAT DOES NOT MEAN WE'RE

A COUPLE.

HE'S THE BABY DADDY.

I'M THE BABY MAMA. THAT'S IT.

C.J.: YEAH. THAT'S THE ONE

THING WE CAN STILL AGREE ON.

Ella: OKAY.

WHY ARE YOU TWO FIGHTING IT?

C.J.: AUNT ELLA, PLEASE.

ALTHOUGH WE DID HAVE SOME FUN

BACK WHEN WE WAS TOGETHER.

REMEMBER THAT TIME WE WENT TO

THE BRAVES GAME AND I CAUGHT THE

BALL?

Janine: WITH YOUR EYE.

YEAH, YOU WERE REALLY PROUD,

TOO.

HE KEPT YELLING, "JANINE, I GOT

IT! I GOT IT!"

Malik: MOM, UH, AT THIS

PARTY, IF THERE'S ANY DESSERTS

THERE, YOU KNOW, YOU COULD PUT

THOSE IN YOUR PURSE, YOU KNOW,

BRING THEM BACK HOME HERE TO ME.

Janine: MALIK, I AM NOT

STEALING ANY FOOD FOR YOU,

ALL RIGHT?

BUT I WILL TAKE YOU AND JAZMINE

OUT TOMORROW.

Jazmine: ARE KIDS GONNA BE AT

THE PARTY? I WANT TO GO.

C.J.: NO. NO, BABY.

THIS -- THIS PARTY IS JUST FOR

GROWNUPS.

LIKE YOUR MOM SAID, THOUGH,

WE'LL TAKE YOU OUT TOMORROW.

Ella: "LIKE YOUR MOM SAID"?

WHO'S GONNA TAKE THEM OUT

TOMORROW?

C.J.: ANYWAY, IT'S TIME TO

START GETTING READY, JANINE.

LET'S GO TAKE A SHOWER.

Ella: SO? SO WHAT? "LET'S"?

C.J.: YOUGO TAKE A SHOWER.

Janine: I'LLGO.

C.J.: AND -- AND THEN I'LL

TAKE A SHOWER.

Janine: OH, RIGHT.

C.J.: BUT NOT TOGETHER.

Janine: NOT TOGETHER.

Ella: CAREFUL, C.J. CAREFUL.

C.J.: OH, MAN!

I FORGOT MY CLOTHES AT THE

CLEANERS'.

Janine: NO, I PICKED THEM UP

ALREADY.

THEY'RE LAYING ON YOUR BED.

C.J.: OH, THANK YOU.

THANK YOU. OKAY.

WHICH TIE YOU THINK I SHOULD

WEAR -- THE BLACK TIE OR THE

BLUE TIE WITH THAT SUIT?

Janine: BLUE -- YOU LOOK GOOD

IN BLUE.

C.J.: BLUE TIE. YEAH.

C.J.: BLUE TIE. YEAH. Janine: OKAY.

Janine: OKAY.

C.J.: EXCUSE ME.

Marcus: OH, C.J.!

[ LAUGHTER ]

Janine: MELISSA, I'M SO GLAD

TO SEE YOU!

[ LAUGHTER ]

Melissa: HOW YOU DOING?

C.J.: LOOK AT YOU, MAN.

Marcus: OH, JANINE.

Janine: HELLO, MARCUS. MWAH!

HOW ARE YOU DOING?

Marcus: GOOD. HEY, WE WERE

WONDERING WHEN YOU GUYS WERE

GONNA GET HERE.

Janine: OH, WELL, SOMEONE WAS

DRIVING A LITTLE CRAZY, BUT WE

MADE IT. HERE YOU GO.

Both: THANK YOU.

Janine: YOU'RE WELCOME.

Melissa: JANINE, YOU STILL

LOOK GOOD.

Janine: WELL, THANK YOU.

Melissa: THAT'S HOW YOU HOLD

ONTO YOUR MAN.

[ LAUGHTER ]

Janine: AH, ACTUALLY,

MELISSA, C.J. AND I ARE

DIVORCED.

Melissa: WHAT?

C.J.: YEAH. BUT WE STILL LIVE

IN THE SAME HOUSE.

IT JUST KIND OF WORKED OUT THAT

WAY.

Marcus: WOW, THAT'S GOT TO

BE TOUGH.

I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT.

HEY, BUT THANK YOU, GUYS, FOR

COMING TO THE PARTY.

C.J.: OH, WE WOULDN'T MISS IT

FOR THE WORLD, YEAH.

Melissa: WE'RE GLAD TO SEE

YOU.

Both: YOU, TOO.

Melissa: WELL, EXCUSE US.

WE NEED TO SPEAK TO A FEW MORE

PEOPLE.

Janine: WE'LL TALK TO YOU

LATER.

C.J.: SEE YOU LATER.

LISTEN, CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR

A SECOND?

Janine: YEAH.

C.J.: UM, IT'S KIND OF

UNCOMFORTABLE HAVING TO EXPLAIN

TO EVERYBODY WHAT HAPPENED TO

OUR MARRIAGE AND EVERYTHING.

SO HOW ABOUT WE JUST TELL

EVERYBODY THAT WE'RE STILL

MARRIED?

Janine: I-I THINK YOU'RE

RIGHT.

C.J.: YEAH. YOU KNOW, WE

DON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE

WHOLE EXPLANATION.

OH, GREAT.

Janine: OH, NO, THANK YOU.

C.J.: YEAH. THANK YOU.

Melissa: C.J., I CAN'T DRINK.

I'M STILL IN RECOVERY.

C.J.: OH, NO, BOTH OF THESE

IS FOR ME.

Janine: BOTH OF THOSE ARE FOR

YOU?

C.J.: MNH! THAT'S CRAZY.

Janine: THEY'RE STRONG, ISN'T

IT?

C.J.: MM-HMM! MM-HMM!

OH, MAN.

Tanya: [ CLEARS THROAT ]

[ LAUGHS ]

C.J. PAYNE, OH, MY GOSH.

YOU LOOK SO GOOD.

YOU LOOK -- YOU LOOK JUST AS

GOOD AS YOU DID BACK AT MELISSA

AND MARCUS' WEDDING.

C.J.: TANYA!

Tanya: YES.

C.J.: HOLD THESE FOR ME,

GIRL.

OH, WOW.

YOU LOOK SO GOOD.

Tanya: THANK YOU.

C.J.: HOW YOU DOING?

Tanya: I'M GREAT.

YOU KNOW, A LITTLE BIRDIE TOLD

ME THAT YOU ARE DIVORCED.

IS THAT TRUE?

C.J.: YEAH.

Janine: NO.

C.J.: YES.

Janine: NO. NO.

C.J., WE JUST TALKED OVER HERE,

AND WHAT WE DECIDED WAS THAT

WE --

C.J.: Shh! Shh!

Tanya: WELL, UM, WHEN YOU

DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE

DIVORCED, WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME

A CALL?

C.J.: OH.

Tanya: YEAH?

C.J.: GREAT. I WILL.

Tanya: OKAY.

C.J.: WOW.

IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.

Tanya: NICE TO SEE YOU.

C.J.: [ CHUCKLES ]

LOOK AT YOU, GIRL.

OH, GOODNESS. YES.

OH, HEY, MAN, LET ME GET THOSE.

OK, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

HOLD ON ONE SECOND.

Janine: C.J.

C.J.: OH, MAN!

WAIT A SECOND. WAIT A SECOND.

HOLD UP.

Janine: DON'T THEY SERVE

WATER OR ANYTHING?

ANYBODY GOT SOME WATER?

C.J.: BROTHER, DO ME A FAVOR,

HOMEY.

KEEP THOSE COMING. MY MAN.

Janine: SHOULDN'T YOU CALM

DOWN A LITTLE BIT?

THAT'S YOUR FOURTH DRINK.

C.J.: I'M READY TO START

DANCING NOW, GIRL.

UNH! YOU READY? COME ON.

WE GOT TO HIT THIS FLOOR RIGHT

HERE.

Janine: OH, OKAY.

C.J.: YEAH!

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

Janine: OKAY.

C.J.: YEAH. WHAT YOU GOT?

WHAT YOU GOT?

Janine: WHAT? WHO?

WHO'S DOING THAT?

C.J.: YOU GONNA TAKE IT

LOWER?

Janine: YEAH. TAKE IT LOWER.

C.J.: DO YOU WANT ME TO HIT

YOU WITH SOMETHING?

I KNOW YOU REMEMBER THIS.

Janine: WHAT?

YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT.

C.J.: OH!

[ SLOW MUSIC PLAYS ]

Janine: WOW. LISTEN, C.J.,

I'M JUST GONNA GO AHEAD AND --

AND STAND OVER HERE.

C.J.: IS THAT OUR -- NO --

IS THAT OUR WEDDING SONG?

Janine: YEAH.

C.J.: THAT'S OUR WEDDING

SONG.

Janine: THAT IS.

C.J.: YOU'VE GOT TO DANCE

WITH ME ON THAT, GIRL.

WE'VE GOT TO DANCE ON THE

WEDDING SONG.

Janine: C.J., I THINK YOU'RE

DRUNK.

C.J.: I'M NOT DRUNK.

I CAN HOLD MY LIQUOR.

Janine: ALL RIGHT. HOLD IT.

C.J.: WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT?

C.J.: WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT? Janine: NOTHING.

Janine: NOTHING.

Janine: UH. UM, C.J., WHY DID

YOU KISS ME?

C.J.: I DON'T KNOW.

WHY'D YOU LET ME?

Tanya: OKAY. [ LAUGHS ]

SO I GUESS YOU GUYS AREN'T

DIVORCED AFTER ALL.

Janine: NO, NO.

REALLY, WE -- WE ARE.

WE JUST LIVE IN THE SAME

HOUSE -- THAT'S ALL.

C.J.: YEAH, YEAH.

AND WE ARE FREE TO SEE WHOEVER

WE WANT TO SEE.

Janine: COMPLETELY FREE --

HE'S RIGHT.

Tanya: YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW

WHAT KIND OF WEIRD RELATIONSHIP

YOU TWO HAVE, BUT, UH, C.J.,

I HAVE WAITED A VERY LONG TIME

TO HOOK UP WITH YOU...SO WHEN

YOU FIGURE THIS ALL OUT, PLEASE

REMEMBER TO GIVE ME A CALL.

Janine: [ CLEARS THROAT ]

Tanya: OKAY?

[ CHUCKLES ]

C.J.: TANYA.

Tanya: BYE.

C.J.: BYE, TANYA.

Melissa: WHAT THE HECK ARE

YOU TWO DOING?

Janine: [ Chuckling ] WHAT?

Melissa: I THOUGHT YOU SAID

YOU WERE DIVORCED.

C.J.: REALLY, REALLY, IT

WAS -- IT WAS JUST A KISS.

Janine: YES.

Melissa: MARCUS AND I'VE BEEN

MARRIED FOR 10 YEARS, AND WE

KNOW A LITTLE BIT ABOUT KISSING

AND RELATIONSHIPS, AND...YOU

GUYS MIGHT BE FOOLING

YOURSELVES, BUT YOU AIN'T

FOOLING US.

Marcus: MM-HMM.

Melissa: MNH-MNH.

Janine: JUST -- NO -- REALLY.

C.J.!

C.J.: HUH?

Pookie: YES, SIR!

THAT'S IT.

NO MáS, POR FAVOR.

NO MáS, POR FAVOR.

[ DICE CLATTER ]

[ DICE CLATTER ] Curtis: [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

Curtis: [ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

WHO -- WHO PAINTED RUBY GREEN?

WHO PAINTED HER METALLIC GREEN?

Pookie: ME AND PEA HOOKED

THAT UP.

HEY, NICE ON THAT PAINT JOB.

Peanut: YEAH, I LIKE THE

RIMS, TOO.

Angel: YOU GUYS GAVE RUBY

RIMS?

Peanut: COME ON, BABY.

STOP WITH THE COMPLIMENTS.

YOU GONNA MAKE ME BLUSH.

YEAH, WE GAVE HER A PAINT JOB --

WE HAD TO PUT SOME RIMS ON HER.

Angel: WHAT IS THIS --

"PIMP MY RIDE"?

Pookie: AS A MATTER OF FACT,

IT IS, AND YOU'VE OFFICIALLY

BEEN PIMPED.

Curtis: AAAH!

DON'T PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME,

YOU HEAR?

YOU DON'T PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME.

YOU HEAR ME?

Pookie: I WAS JUST TRYING TO

PIMP --

Curtis: LOOK, IT'S A FIRE

TRUCK!

HUSTLE & FLOW, YOU TWO DONE LOST

YOUR MINDS!

A FIRE TRUCK IS SUPPOSED TO BE

RED, RED LIKE BLOOD, RED LIKE A

STOPLIGHT!

Pookie: MR. PAYNE, WE WAS

TRYING TO HOOK YOUR TRUCK UP,

ALL RIGHT?

WE JUST WANTED IT TO BE

DIFFERENT THAN EVERY OTHER TRUCK

ON THE STREET.

WHEN PEOPLE SEE YOUR TRUCK, WE

WANTED THEM TO BE LIKE, "YO, YO,

YO, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK!

THERE GO MR. PAYNE'S WHIP RIGHT

THERE, SHORTY.

THAT'S FIRE!"

Calvin: LOOK, LOOK, POP, POP,

I THINK WHAT THEY'RE TRYING TO

SAY IS, BE A TRENDSETTER, YOU

KNOW, STAND APART FROM THE

GROUP.

Pookie: EXACTLY.

Curtis: YOU KNOW, BEING

POINTED OUT IN A LINEUP SETS YOU

APART FROM A GROUP.

CHANGE RUBY BACK!

Pookie: ALL RIGHT, LOOK, IT

TOOK US A LONG TIME TO DO ALL

THAT, MR. PAYNE, ALL RIGHT?

CANDY PAINT AIN'T CHEAP.

CAN WE AT LEAST GET SOMETHING TO

EAT, JUST SO WE...

Curtis: OKAY.

Pookie: APPRECIATE IT.

Curtis: YOU WORKED HARD.

Pookie: RIGHT. WE DID.

Curtis: I MEAN, THAT'S A LOT

OF TRUCK.

LET ME CALL DOWN TO COUNTY JAIL

AND SEE WHAT TIME THEY'RE

SERVING.

WHAT NAME DO YOU WANT YOUR

RESERVATIONS UNDER?

Peanut: HEY, UM, SEE IF THEY

GOT THEM LITTLE SANDWICHES...

Pookie: SMOKING SECTION, IF

THEY HAVE A SMOKING --

Curtis: CHANGE RUBY BACK!

Marcus: AND I'D JUST LIKE TO

ADD THAT THE LAST 10 YEARS HAVE

BEEN THE HAPPIEST IN MY LIFE,

MELISSA.

Melissa: [ LAUGHS ]

Marcus: THANKS TO C.J. AND

JANINE, WHO INTRODUCED US.

Melissa: YES.

Marcus: HEY, GET OVER HERE,

C.J., AND SAY A FEW WORDS.

COME ON, BROTHER.

C.J.: ME?

[ LAUGHS ]

LOOK AT THIS.

I'VE NEVER DRANK THIS MUCH

BEFORE IN MY LIFE.

Melissa: OKAY.

C.J.: AND I JUST WANT TO SAY

THAT, LOOKING AT YOU TWO, THERE

WILL NEVER BE A HAPPIER COUPLE

THAN YOU TWO.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT,

MUCUS...YOU ARE HER MAN, OKAY?

Marcus: OKAY.

C.J.: AND, METHUSE--

METHUSELAH...YOU ARE HIS BOO.

Melissa: MM-HMM.

C.J.: JANINE!

[ LAUGHS ]

YOU ARE MY BOO-BOO.

Janine: BOO-BOO?

C.J.: YES.

WHEN MY HOUSE BURNED DOWN,

YOU WERE THERE.

WHEN THEY ROBBED MY AUNT AND

UNCLE'S HOUSE, YOU WAS THERE.

WHEN I SPENT ALL OF MY UNCLE'S

RETIRE-M-MENT MONEY PUTTING YOU

INTO THE REHAB-AB-ABILITATION,

YOU WAS THERE!

ACTUALLY, SHE WASN'T THERE.

THAT'S WHY I WASTED THE MONEY.

SHE LEFT.

[ LAUGHS ]

Janine: [ CHUCKLES ]

C.J.: BUT I JUST WANTED TO

SAY THAT, THROUGH IT ALL, I LOVE

YOU, GIRL.

NO, NO.

I HAVE TO MAKE A TOAST.

THAT IS MY GIRL.

♪ O, SAY, CAN YOU SEE

HOW THE CRACK BURNED MY HOUSE ♪

♪ AND SO PROUDLY MY KIDS HAD

A CRACKHEAD FOR A MOTHER? ♪

Marcus: C.J.

C.J.: LET GO, MAN.

Marcus: WE GOT MORE IN THE

BACK. COME ON, C.J.

C.J.: OKAY. OKAY.

LET ME JUST SAY THIS.

LET ME SAY ONE THING.

LET ME SAY ONE THING.

TO ALL MY FRIENDS --

TO ALL MY FRIENDS, LOOK AT YOU.

Marcus: ALL RIGHT!

C.J.: HEY, DO I SING A SONG?

I SANG A SONG!

"GOLDFINGER"!

[ LAUGHS ]

Calvin: COME ON, ANGEL.

THIS IS CRAZY.

YOU'RE BEATING THE PANTS OFF OF

US.

Peanut: YEAH. FOR REAL.

YOU'RE BETTER THAN MY

GRANDMOTHER AT STRIP POKER.

I'M SITTING HERE IN DRAWERS AND

A HAT ON.

Angel: DROP 'EM.

DROP 'EM.

Pookie: HOW DID SHE DO THAT?

[ FINGERS SNAPPING ]

Calvin: DO I HAVE TO?

Peanut: THIS AIN'T RIGHT.

Curtis: WHAT THE HELL?!

WHAT THE HELL?! WHAT THE HELL?!

WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON IN

HERE?!

Calvin: ANGEL BEAT US IN

STRIP POKER.

Peanut: AND CRAPS.

Pookie: AND ROULETTE.

Curtis: WHERE DID YOU EVEN

GET A ROULETTE WHEEL?

Angel: OH, WE TOOK ONE OF THE

75s OFF RUBY.

Curtis: THAT'S IT!

THAT'S IT.

I WANT BOTH OF YOU --

BOTH OF YOU -- POOKIE, PEAKIE,

POKEY, POOKIE, PICKY MINY MOE,

I WANT BOTH OF YOU OUT!

GET YOUR CLOTHES AND GET OUT.

I'M NOT SIGNING NO PAPER.

I'M NOT SAYING ANYTHING ELSE TO

YOU. GET YOUR STUFF.

DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT PUTTING

IT ON.

YOU CAN PUT IT ON OUTSIDE.

Peanut: ALL RIGHT.

WE'LL LEAVE.

BUT JUST REMEMBER -- WE KNOW

WHERE YOU LIVE.

Curtis: YOU THREATENING ME?

YOU THREATENING ME?

MY BAT KNOWS WHERE YOUR HEAD AND

KNEECAPS LIVE.

Pookie: OKAY, ALL RIGHT.

LOOK, MR. PAYNE, NO DISRESPECT.

IT'S ALL GOOD. YOU KNOW WHY?

'CAUSE I DO REMEMBER RUBY GREEN.

SHE PARKED RIGHT OUTSIDE.

WE'RE GONNA STOP AND SEE HER

AND BREAK HER DOWN ON OUR WAY

OUT.

Curtis: HOLD UP.

GIVE ME THE PAPER.

YEAH, I'M GONNA SIGN THE PAPER.

ANYTHING TO KEEP A LITTLE THUG

ANYTHING TO KEEP A LITTLE THUG LIFE AWAY FROM MY FIREHOUSE.

LIFE AWAY FROM MY FIREHOUSE.

Janine: ALL RIGHT.

C.J.: AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT?

THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

Janine: I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKE

IT.

C.J.: WE'RE TOGETHER.

Janine: YEAH. YOU STAY RIGHT

HERE.

STAY UP. DON'T FALL.

C.J.: I LOVE YOU.

Janine: "I LOVE YOU"? YEAH.

ALL RIGHT. HEY! HEY!

NO. UP, UP, UP, UP. OKAY.

C.J.: OKAY.

Janine: ALL RIGHT. COME HERE.

C.J.: OKAY.

Janine: I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU

SANG THAT RIDICULOUS SONG AT THE

PARTY.

C.J.: OKAY.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAD ME DO

THE REMIX.

[ IMITATING REMIX BEATS ]

Janine: Shh!

C.J. C.J., YOU'RE GONNA --

YOU'RE GONNA -- C.J., OH, MY

PURSE.

YOU'RE GONNA WAKE THE KIDS,

OKAY? COME ON.

C.J.: THE KIDS?

Janine: THE KIDS.

C.J.: THE KIDS STAY HERE?

Janine: YES.

C.J.: WAIT. WAIT.

WAIT A SECOND. WAIT A SECOND.

Janine: WHAT?

C.J.: WHOSE HOUSE IS THIS?

Janine: THIS IS YOUR AUNT AND

YOUR UNCLE'S.

Shh! QUIET, C.J., YOU'RE GONNA

WAKE EVERYBODY UP.

C.J.: WHOA.

I THOUGHT WE WAS GOING HOME.

[ LAUGHTER ]

Janine: YOU HAD A GOOD TIME,

DIDN'T YOU?

C.J.: WHOO. I HAD A BALL.

Janine: I'M GLAD WE WENT

TOGETHER.

C.J.: LET ME SAY THIS.

WAIT A SECOND. WAIT A SECOND.

Janine: YOU'RE -- I DON'T

WANT YOU TO FALL.

C.J.: I'M NOT GONNA FALL.

I'M NOT -- I'M NOT DRUNK.

I'M NOT --

Janine: Shh! OKAY.

C.J.: WATCH THIS.

YOU SEE THIS?

Janine: I SEE IT.

OKAY!

C.J.: OH!

[ LAUGHS ]

OH, MAN, I ALMOST FELL.

Janine: WHY DON'T YOU SIT

DOWN? YOU NEED TO SIT DOWN?

C.J.: SIT DOWN WHERE?

Janine: RIGHT ON THE COUCH.

C.J.: I'M GOING TO THE BED.

WHOA!

OKAY.

Janine: OKAY.

C.J.: OKAY.

Janine: I'VE GOT TO GET MY

STRENGTH BACK TOGETHER.

C.J.: WHO PUT THE CHAIR

UNDERNEATH OF ME WHILE I WAS

TURNING?

Janine: [ CHUCKLES ]

THE CHAIR HAS BEEN HERE,

ALL RIGHT?

LISTEN, I'M GONNA GET YOU TO

YOUR BED. YOU ARE RIPPED.

C.J.: HEY, JANINE.

Janine: HEY, YOU NEED TO BE

QUIET.

C.J.: WHEW. GUESS WHAT.

Janine: WHAT?

C.J.: I LOVE YOU.

HOLD ON A SECOND!

Janine: WHAT?

C.J.: [ LAUGHS ]

Janine: OKAY, C.J.

C.J.: DID YOU SEE HOW I DID

THAT?

[ LAUGHS ]

Janine: OKAY. OKAY. OKAY.

LISTEN, DON'T KISS ME ANYMORE,

OKAY?

YOU'RE DRUNK. YOU ARE GONE.

C.J.: I GOT TO KISS --

Janine: NO, YOU DON'T.

C.J.: I GOT TO KISS YOU.

Janine: C.J., C.J., OKAY.

C.J.: I LOVE YOU.

Janine: I -- OKAY.

OKAY, LET'S GO.

LET'S GET YOU TO THE BED.

C.J.: THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.

Janine: ALL RIGHT, C.J.,

YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME,

ARE YOU? C.J.?

C.J.: HUH?

Janine: YOU'RE DRUNK.

C.J.: SAY MY NAME.

Janine: I'M NOT SAYING IT.

C.J.: SAY IT.

Janine: NO.

C.J.: PUT YOUR LEGS ON THE

COUCH, BABY.

AH!

Janine: C.J., OKAY. OKAY.

MY LEGS ARE ON THE COUCH.

C.J.: YOU'RE SO FUNNY.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT?

Janine: WHAT?

C.J.: WE CAN SLEEP RIGHT

HERE.

Janine: NO.

C.J.: MM-HMM.

Janine: NO. THAT WOULDN'T

BE...A GOOD THING, OKAY?

C.J.: YOU KNOW WHAT?

Janine: WHAT?

C.J.: WHY DON'T -- WHY DON'T

YOU SLEEP IN MY BED TONIGHT?

[ LAUGHS ]