Original subtitles

Ella: curtis.

Curtis, wake up!

Would you wake up?

What are you doing?

Curtis: I'm cutting the

Grass.

Ella: oh, okay. I getcha.

Curtis: ugh!

Ella! Ella!

Ella: curtis, get up.

Get up. Get up. Get up.

Curtis: ella, would you quit?

Go on.

Ella: curtis, get up.

Okay, one more time.

What have you been promising me

You were gonna do for a whole

Month now?

Curtis: I give. What?

Ella: you said you were gonna

Clean that stuff up out of the

Garage.

Curtis: no, I didn't say

That.

You said that.

I was just in the room.

Ella: don't play with me.

Don't play with me.

Curtis: calm down.

I'm gonna clean the garage.

Ella: when?

Curtis: I'm gonna do the

Garage.

I'm gonna get malik to help

Me, okay?

Ella: okay, well, what you

Waiting on?

Curtis: baby, 'cause malik

Is asleep.

I can't carry them boxes by

Myself.

Ella: okay, well, I'll wake

Him up.

Curtis: no, don't you wake up

That baby!

Baby, don't you know that sleep

Deprivation causes illness?

Ella: curtis --

Curtis: that boy could catch

A cold with that draft.

Ella: you think I'm playing

With you, don't you?

Curtis, I --

Curtis: what? What?

[ laughing ]

Ella: curtis, I know another

Kind of deprivation of

Something...

Curtis: climbing over

Couches?

Ella: ...That will cause you

To have to have cold showers.

Curtis: you always do that.

You really think that's gonna

Work every time.

Ella: it does, doesn't it?

Curtis: sure do.

Ella: you know what?

Forget it. It's all right.

You don't have to move.

Stay right there, baby.

Curtis: good.

Ella: I'll go move the boxes

Myself.

Mm-hmm. All by myself.

Curtis: baby, I was just

Playing.

I'm gonna get the boxes.

Ella: [ indistinct shouting ]

Curtis: I got the boxes,

Baby!

I ain't -- look, ain't no cold

Water.

Come on, malik!

Jazmine: okay, let's make

Miss missy's home be on the

Table.

Tiffany: miss missy?

She doesn't look like a missy.

Let's name her tataneesha.

Jazmine: tataneesha?

What kind of name is that?

Tiffany: a cool one.

Jazmine: spell it.

Tiffany: t-a-t-a, "Neesha."

Jazmine: okay, remind me to

Never ask you to help me with my

Spelling words.

Okay, so, the bedroom can be

Here, and the baby's room can be

Over here.

Tiffany: hey, let's make

Tataneesha go out on a date.

Jazmine: she doesn't go on

Dates because she's engaged to

Ted.

Tiffany: we'll see how long

That lasts.

C.J.: hey, what are you girls

Doing?

Tiffany: playing with our

Dolls.

Jazmine: yeah.

Auntie ella said that we can

Make a doll town.

Do you want to play with us?

C.J.: no. No. No, thanks.

I have to go out with

Ms. Jamieson.

Tiffany: ms. Jamieson?

He's dating our assistant

Principal?

Jazmine: unfortunately.

But I don't want to talk about

It.

Tiffany: wow, jazmine, you

You can get in trouble at home

Or school.

First it starts with dates, then

They move to san francisco...

Just like my dad and my stepmom.

Jazmine: your dad moved?

Tiffany: yep, all the way to

San francisco.

Jazmine: okay, let's just

Play.

Leave that drama for your

Stepmama.

Tiffany: let's make this doll

The stepmom, and the chair can

Be san francisco.

Jazmine: no, I already told

You -- there's no stepmom.

There's only a mom and a dad.

Tiffany: hey, I'm the guest.

I get to say what we play.

Jazmine: well, guess what.

This is my house, and I'm

Telling you that there's only

Ted and tataneesha, and they're

Staying in atlanta!

Ella: jazmine, baby, what is

Going on out here?

Jazmine: I don't want to play

The way tiffany wants to play.

Ella: remember what I said,

Jazmine -- she is your guest.

Tiffany: told you.

Ella: tiffany.

You know what?

I am not going to survive this

Weekend if you two do not stop

Fighting.

So, jazmine, play what tiffany

Wants to play.

Tiffany.

Tiffany!

Let's see if we can't call your

Mama. Um...

Just play what jazmine wants to

Play, okay?

Tiffany: thank you,

Mrs. Payne.

Jazmine: yes, ma'am.

Ella: you're welcome,

Tiffany.

Tiffany: now, like I was

Saying, ted and his new wife are

Flying to san francisco.

This sofa can be the plane.

[ imitates engine noises ]

Hey! Why'd you that?

Jazmine: uh, the flight was

Cancelled.

Malik: uncle curtis, why do I

Always have to carry the big

Boxes?

Curtis: because you're so big

And strong and muscular.

Malik: I know where you're

Trying to use reverse psychology

On me.

Curtis: [ laughs ]

All right, then the real reason

Is 'cause I said so.

Oh, mama's dishes.

Set those right there.

That's a keeper.

Christmas lights -- too much

Work -- junk!

Malik: don't you think auntie

Ella's gonna be mad that we're

Keeping more stuff than we're

Giving away?

Curtis: what are you talking

About?

No, she's not.

We're not keeping stuff.

I threw away that pink ugly

Thing, the shade, whatever that

Is.

I don't even know what that is.

Malik: I mean, why don't we

Just throw all this stuff away?

It's all junk.

Curtis: what are you talking

About?

What are you talking about, boy?

This ain't junk.

Malik, this is a lifetime of

Memories.

[ chuckles ]

Oh, my goodness.

Boy, do you know --

Unh!

[ laughs ]

Unh!

Unh!

You stomp in these.

See, you don't even know what

You got in front of you, huh?

These are metallic green, patent

Vinyl platform shoes.

They don't even make platform

Shoes no more.

Malik: mmm.

Curtis: I don't know what

Happened!

Malik: well, I mean, how do

You even walk in those?

Curtis: walk?

Boy, you don't walk in these

Shoes.

I didn't walk in these.

I glide in them.

[ laughs ]

You glide with these, boy.

Malik: yeah.

Curtis: yeah.

Malik: so, what else we got

Here?

Is this a pet rock?

Curtis: yuh!

Spoony!

Spoony!

Spoony!

Oh ho! You found spoony!

Oh, my goodness!

Oh, give it here before you hurt

Him, before you hurt him.

Malik: it really is a rock,

Huh?

Curtis: that's why it's

Called a pet rock, mr. Smart.

[ laughs ]

Look at that.

Hey, spoony did tricks.

You think I'm playing with you.

I used to tell people all the

Time.

They never believed me when I

Told them spoony do tricks.

Check this. Watch this, watch

This -- you think I'm playing.

Roll over, spoony.

Roll over, spoony.

And then he rolls.

[ laughs ]

You saw it roll, didn't you?

Malik: no.

Curtis: I'm gonna tell you

Something else about spoony.

The thing about him was -- you

Heard of a guard dog, right?

Malik: yeah.

Curtis: spoony was my guard

Rock.

Malik: how can a rock guard

You?

Curtis: like this.

Sick him, spoony! Uhh!

[ laughs ]

Anything I want!

Sure! Mess with me again.

Mess with me again.

[ laughs ]

He'll do it for you, too.

Hold it in your hand.

You got to hold him like this.

Malik: sick him, spoony.

Curtis: lookit, see?

He got you.

But be careful.

You gonna give him a headache.

C.J.: hey, nicole, come on

In.

Nicole: hey, girls!

C.J.: [ chuckles ]

These two have turned our living

Room into doll town.

Nicole: gosh! I see.

How cute.

Oh!

Jazmine: where are you taking

My daddy?

C.J.: hey, hey, jazmine,

Watch your tone.

Nicole: no, it's okay, c.J.

I am taking your dad to see a

Play this afternoon.

Tiffany: jazmine, you better

Hope it's not in san francisco.

Nicole: no, but san francisco

Is one of my favorite cities.

I'd love to move there.

C.J.: oh, yeah?

Nicole: yeah.

C.J.: I'd like to go, too.

Jazmine: oh, no, you

Wouldn't!

C.J.: well, I didn't mean

This second.

Jazmine: yeah, or ever.

C.J.: what's going on?

Jazmine: [ sighs ] Nothing.

It's just I wanted you to stay

Home today.

C.J.: but, jazmine,

Ms. Jamieson already bought the

Tickets, okay?

Jazmine: I guess so.

C.J.: I'll be back soon, all

Right?

We better get going, nicole.

All right, you girls have fun

And be good, okay?

Nicole: bye, girls.

C.J.: okay, tiffany?

Tiffany: I'm sorry, jazmine.

I know just how you feel.

Jazmine: well, since your dad

Got married again, do you ever

See him anymore?

Tiffany: nope.

Only during the holidays.

Jazmine: man.

My mom's already gone.

I can't lose my dad, too.

Malik: uncle curtis, how'd

You say you glide in these?

Curtis: [ laughs ]

Look at you, boy! Look at you!

You look like you're walking on

A tightrope.

You better take them off before

You kill yourself.

Look at these! Look at these!

Look at these! Look at these!

Oh, my goodness!

Malik: what are those --

Records?

Curtis: boy, that's exactly

What they are!

You don't know nothing about

This one here.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Look at that -- parliament,

"Chocolate city."

Oh, my goodness.

This is 1975. Got to be '75.

You don't know nothing about

This.

Malik: I sure don't, 'cause

It's 100 years old.

How do you even play them?

Curtis: how do you play them?

Where that-- I know I got...

It's right here. Uh-oh!

I knew it was gonna come in

Handy.

I-I knew it!

Okay.

Here, plug this in.

Plug that up right around the

Corner, right there.

[ laughs gleefully ]

Oh, my goodness!

Look at this.

Now, this right here -- this is

How we used to listen to

Recorded music.

All recorded music -- you had to

Have one of these.

And then new technology came in,

And that's when you got your

Eight tracks... And cassette.

So we gon-- let me see.

Ooh. Oh, my goodness.

Here we go.

We could do with this one

Right here, hit you with this

Right here.

Malik: the temptations?

Curtis: what you know about

The temps?

What you know about the temps?

[ laughs ]

Here, I'm gonna do you the

Honors, take--

Don't put your hands on it like

That!

You don't grab it like that!

This ain't no cd!

This is a record!

You heard me?

Now take it out like this.

Do it like.

Put it on your stomach.

That's why god gave you a

Stomach.

Just like that.

Now, I'm gonna set it up.

Malik: well, you know, it

Kind of looks like a frisbee.

Curtis: [ chuckles ]

[ breathes sharply ]

I almost took your heart out,

Boy.

I almost took your -- I almost

Did it.

I almost did it.

I love you.

I loves you, malik. I do.

But I'll kill you dead before I

Let you throw my records!

Do you hear me?

Okay. Okay.

Don't do it no more, okay?

Don't do it no more.

Malik: okay.

Curtis: okay, hold it like

This and blow on it.

Blow the dust off it.

Dry blow, not wet blows!

Thank you.

Okay, put it down, put it--

Don't you touch it with your

Fingers, don't you touch it

With your fingers. Okay...

[ blows ]

Did you plug it up?

Malik: you didn't turn it on.

Curtis: okay. Let me figure

It out -- it should be working.

Let me make sure it...

Make sure it's...

[ muttering ]

Malik: wick-a, wick-a,

Wick-a...

Curtis: what the hell?

What the --

What the hell you doing?

What you doing, boy?!

Malik: I was --

Curtis: no, malik, malik!

Malik: I was scratching!

Curtis: malik! Malik!

What are you doing?

You don't do that to a record,

Son!

This ain't -- man --

Malik: [ whimpers ]

Curtis: pkuh!

[ munching noises ]

Eat some. Eat some.

He's sorry, temps.

He's sorry.

He's sorry, temps.

What the hell -- ohh!

Put my record up.

Nicole: the best part.

[ both laugh ]

C.J.: hey, girls.

Nicole: hey!

Jazmine: oh, hey!

C.J.: jazmine, what are you

Doing?

Nicole: okay, I got it!

C.J.: no -- hey.

Jazmine: hi, daddy.

Can you help us, because we're

Planning ted and tataneesha's

Wedding.

You can be ted.

Nicole: oh, does that mean I

Can be tataneesha?

Jazmine: no, that means

You're not invited. Ah!

C.J.: jazmine.

Tiffany: mr. Payne, when you

And jazmine's mom got married,

Did you get married in a church?

C.J.: um, yes, we did.

Jazmine: and did mommy wear a

Pretty dress like this?

C.J.: well...

Nicole: honey, I am sure your

Mommy was a lovely bride.

Jazmine: hello? Touching me.

And, um, I was talking to my

Dad.

C.J.: that's enough, jazmine.

Tiffany: and, mr. Payne, when

You proposed to jazmine's mom,

Did you get down on one knee

Like this?

C.J.: uh, no, baby.

My leg doesn't do all of that.

Jazmine: and, dad, when you

Got married to mom, didn't you

Promise to love her forever and

Ever, until you died?

Nicole: that's cute.

Jazmine: no, it's actually

Not.

And you can sit right there?

Because you're crowding me and

My dad.

Nicole: oh... Okay.

Jazmine: thank you.

Dad, answer the question.

C.J.: jazmine, what is your

Problem?

Jazmine: I don't want a new

Mom.

C.J.: new mom?

Nicole: oh-kay.

You know, maybe I should go.

Jazmine: get out!

C.J.: what is wrong with you?

What are you doing?

And where are you going,

Tiffany?

Tiffany: to jazmine's room.

I don't want to be a witness to

Anything.

See ya!

C.J.: I'm sorry about all of

This.

I'll just call you later.

Nicole: yeah.

Jazmine: you might want to

Step back a little more -- back,

More back, more back.

Nicole: yeah, okay, I--

C.J.: jazmine, listen to me.

I don't know what your problem

Is, but you need to go your room

And calm down.

Jazmine: that's not my room!

C.J.: what?

Jazmine: that's not my room.

And this isn't our house!

C.J.: jazmine, what are you

Talking about?

Jazmine: I want to go home.

C.J.: this is our home.

Jazmine: no! Not this home.

I mean our home -- you know,

Like when it was just me, you,

Mommy, and malik?

C.J.: look, jazmine, you know

The house is gone.

And I don't know where your

Mommy is.

Jazmine: but when mommy was

Here, we were a family.

C.J.: yeah, but I can't bring

Your mommy back.

I can't bring the house back.

Jazmine: don't say that!

C.J.: look, I'm sorry.

Jazmine: it's just I want mom

Back, and I want our home back.

C.J.: okay.

All right. All right.

Okay.

I'm sorry.

Ella: c.J., I know she's

Upset, but when she gets it

Together, you need to deal with

Her about talking to

Ms. Jamieson like that.

C.J.: okay.

Ella: hey, hey, hey, baby.

How was your nap?

Jazmine: it was good.

Where's tiffany?

C.J.: I took her home.

So, you ready to talk?

Jazmine: yes, sir.

Ella: I'll leave you two

Alone.

C.J.: no, no, stay.

I might need your help.

So, jazmine, what's going on?

Jazmine: when tiffany's dad

And her mom broke up, her

Stepmom took her dad to

San francisco, and I don't like

San francisco.

C.J.: baby, you never been to

San francisco.

Jazmine: focus, dad.

The point is that she doesn't

See her dad anymore.

C.J.: ms. Jamieson and I just

Started dating.

We're not thinking about

Marriage.

Jazmine: I can tell that you

Do like her a lot.

Ella: I can tell that, too.

C.J.: you're not helping.

Ella: sorry.

Go ahead. Go ahead.

C.J.: yes, jazmine, I do.

I like ms. Jamieson.

But if I were to ever marry

Anybody, it wouldn't change the

Fact that I'm your dad.

And having a mommy around and

Your own home doesn't make you a

Family.

Jazmine: it doesn't?

C.J.: no.

We're a family, with mommy or

Without.

And our home is wherever we

Live.

You understand?

Jazmine: yes, sir.

C.J.: and I know that some

Dads move on, but me, you, and

Malik -- we a team.

Nobody ever split us up.

Jazmine: yes, sir.

C.J.: you okay?

Jazmine: mm-hmm.

C.J.: all right. Good.

What?

Super dad.

[ both chuckle ]

Ella: jazmine, um, auntie

Wants to talk to you.

I know that you're not happy,

Baby, with your mom's situation

And your current living

Situation.

I heard you this afternoon.

But you are never, ever, ever

Again to disrespect an adult

Like you did ms. Jamieson and

Your father.

Do you hear me?

Jazmine: yes, ma'am.

Ella: now, your daddy

Believes in alternative

Discipline methods.

But auntie is from the old

School.

I believe, "Spare the rod, spoil

The child."

I'm not sparing the rod.

Now, you will learn some

Manners, because if you don't,

It's gonna be me and you, little

Lady.

Jazmine: yes, ma'am.

Ella: now go to your room

Before I get you.

Jazmine.

I'm not playing with you.

Ella: curtis!

No!

[ laughs ] Ah ah! Ah ah ah!

What you doing?

Curtis: [ laughs ]

Remember that?

Ella: no!

This is my wig from the

"Soul train" audition!

I ain't putting this on.

It's too hot for that.

Curtis: hey, hey!

You know that's the reason we

Didn't make the cut.

Ella: what?

Curtis: because you couldn't

Do the robot.

We had it! We were right there!

Ella: whatever.

I can out-dance you right now!

Curtis: hit it!

[ singing disco beat ]

Ella: the robot was first.

No, that was not it.

It was, "Unh, ah, unh, ah," and

It was, "Ka-pow! Ka-pow!"

Curtis: well, we started out

With-- with started with this.

Remember?

Ella: and the camel walk.

Curtis: camel walk.

Ella: and the camel walk.

Curtis: camel, camel.

Ella: and the camel walk.

That is not how it went! It--

[ laughs ]

Curtis!

[ curtis beat-boxing ]

He don't remember. What?

That's it! Back up!

And unh! Unh-unh!

Curtis: then I said --

Huh! Huh! Huh!

[ heel breaks ] Ooh!

Ella: [ laughs ]

That's why we didn't win!

That's why!