All language subtitles for Tyler Perrys House of Payne - S01E21 - I Got the Hook Up WEBDL-1080p_track3_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,689 --> 00:00:07,034 [ indistinct arguing ] 2 00:00:07,034 --> 00:00:08,620 >> ella: what's going on?! 3 00:00:08,620 --> 00:00:09,931 [ arguing continues ] 4 00:00:09,931 --> 00:00:12,655 What's going on, guys? 5 00:00:12,655 --> 00:00:13,827 What's going on? 6 00:00:13,827 --> 00:00:17,068 Quiet! 7 00:00:17,068 --> 00:00:18,862 C.J., what happened? 8 00:00:18,862 --> 00:00:19,793 >> curtis: why does he get to go 9 00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:20,517 First? 10 00:00:20,517 --> 00:00:21,862 >> ella: because I said so. 11 00:00:21,862 --> 00:00:23,482 >> c.J.: well, ms. Claretha's 12 00:00:23,482 --> 00:00:25,241 Daughter, huretha, she asked me 13 00:00:25,241 --> 00:00:26,655 If I wanted to go to the 14 00:00:26,655 --> 00:00:27,862 Alicia keys concert. 15 00:00:27,862 --> 00:00:29,655 You know how much I love alicia. 16 00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:30,344 So I went. 17 00:00:30,344 --> 00:00:31,931 >> ella: okay, so what's the 18 00:00:31,931 --> 00:00:32,586 Problem? 19 00:00:32,586 --> 00:00:34,172 >> curtis: the problem is him 20 00:00:34,172 --> 00:00:36,620 Having to take out "Huge-retha" 21 00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:38,758 Is cruel and unusual punishment. 22 00:00:38,758 --> 00:00:40,793 And c.J.'s been through enough! 23 00:00:40,793 --> 00:00:42,241 >> ella: but, curtis, he just 24 00:00:42,241 --> 00:00:43,620 Said he wanted to go. 25 00:00:43,620 --> 00:00:45,172 And why would you say something 26 00:00:45,172 --> 00:00:46,862 So mean about huretha? 27 00:00:46,862 --> 00:00:47,931 >> curtis: because it's the 28 00:00:47,931 --> 00:00:49,172 Truth, ella! 29 00:00:49,172 --> 00:00:50,827 It's the truth, huh! 30 00:00:50,827 --> 00:00:52,758 Do you know that she made them 31 00:00:52,758 --> 00:00:55,000 Go to porky's rib shack, where 32 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,827 She closed down the "Buff-ett"? 33 00:00:57,827 --> 00:01:00,000 The whole "Buff-ett," ella! 34 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:01,758 Nobody else could eat nothing, 35 00:01:01,758 --> 00:01:02,413 Ella! 36 00:01:02,413 --> 00:01:03,448 >> claretha: no, no. 37 00:01:03,448 --> 00:01:04,275 >> curtis: and then on top of 38 00:01:04,275 --> 00:01:06,000 That, he took her to the store, 39 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:07,620 Where she hooked up a siphon to 40 00:01:07,620 --> 00:01:09,000 The soda machine and sucked up 41 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,517 All the slushies! 42 00:01:10,517 --> 00:01:12,310 No slushies for the kids, ella! 43 00:01:12,310 --> 00:01:13,241 >> claretha: wrong, wrong, 44 00:01:13,241 --> 00:01:14,413 Wrong! 45 00:01:14,413 --> 00:01:15,827 First of all, it wasn't porky's 46 00:01:15,827 --> 00:01:18,172 Rib shack -- it was hog heaven. 47 00:01:18,172 --> 00:01:20,275 And second, she did not close 48 00:01:20,275 --> 00:01:22,034 Down the "Buff-ett" from 49 00:01:22,034 --> 00:01:23,137 Anybody. 50 00:01:23,137 --> 00:01:25,413 Third, huretha does not even 51 00:01:25,413 --> 00:01:26,413 Drink slushies. 52 00:01:26,413 --> 00:01:28,862 She always washes down her food 53 00:01:28,862 --> 00:01:30,827 With a little sip of diet soda. 54 00:01:30,827 --> 00:01:32,620 >> curtis: she's delusional. 55 00:01:32,620 --> 00:01:33,586 She's delusional. 56 00:01:33,586 --> 00:01:34,758 She in her own world, ella. 57 00:01:34,758 --> 00:01:36,344 Did you know that c.J. Had to 58 00:01:36,344 --> 00:01:38,413 Pay $30 for valet -- you didn't 59 00:01:38,413 --> 00:01:39,482 Know I knew that, did you? 60 00:01:39,482 --> 00:01:43,000 $30 for valet 'cause huretha 61 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,310 [grunts] Couldn't walk her big 62 00:01:45,310 --> 00:01:47,448 Behind 20 feet across the 63 00:01:47,448 --> 00:01:48,344 Parking lot. 64 00:01:48,344 --> 00:01:49,724 >> claretha: wrong, wrong again. 65 00:01:49,724 --> 00:01:52,896 It wasn't $30. It was $29.50. 66 00:01:52,896 --> 00:01:54,344 And it was the only parking that 67 00:01:54,344 --> 00:01:55,827 Was left. 68 00:01:55,827 --> 00:01:57,172 >> ella: okay. 69 00:01:57,172 --> 00:01:59,206 How do y'all know all of this? 70 00:01:59,206 --> 00:02:00,344 >> c.J.: 'cause they followed 71 00:02:00,344 --> 00:02:01,206 Us! 72 00:02:01,206 --> 00:02:02,206 >> ella: what?! 73 00:02:02,206 --> 00:02:04,896 Why were y'all following them? 74 00:02:04,896 --> 00:02:06,275 >> curtis: protection. 75 00:02:06,275 --> 00:02:08,103 >> claretha: for protection. 76 00:02:08,103 --> 00:02:10,758 Anyway, we all know c.J.'s on 77 00:02:10,758 --> 00:02:12,206 The rebound, and I didn't want 78 00:02:12,206 --> 00:02:13,310 Him to take advantage of my 79 00:02:13,310 --> 00:02:14,275 Baby. 80 00:02:14,275 --> 00:02:15,275 >> curtis: how the hell he gonna 81 00:02:15,275 --> 00:02:16,241 Take advantage?! 82 00:02:16,241 --> 00:02:17,482 She outweigh him by two grown 83 00:02:17,482 --> 00:02:19,068 Folk and a midget! 84 00:02:19,068 --> 00:02:20,965 Every time she walk outside, 85 00:02:20,965 --> 00:02:21,931 The earth tilts! 86 00:02:21,931 --> 00:02:22,896 >> ella: curtis! 87 00:02:22,896 --> 00:02:23,758 >> curtis: everybody be like, 88 00:02:23,758 --> 00:02:24,655 "Come on inside, come on 89 00:02:24,655 --> 00:02:26,206 "Come on inside, come on Inside." 90 00:02:26,206 --> 00:02:31,551 Inside." 91 00:02:31,551 --> 00:02:33,793 >> calvin: ah, there he is. 92 00:02:33,793 --> 00:02:35,103 C.J., c.J. 93 00:02:35,103 --> 00:02:36,379 So I hear you're back on the 94 00:02:36,379 --> 00:02:39,724 Market again...In a bigway. 95 00:02:39,724 --> 00:02:41,000 >> keenan: yeah, 96 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:43,517 Double-dating...The same girl. 97 00:02:43,517 --> 00:02:44,931 >> c.J.: ha ha. 98 00:02:44,931 --> 00:02:45,931 Very funny. 99 00:02:45,931 --> 00:02:46,965 Yeah, I decided to start dating 100 00:02:46,965 --> 00:02:47,758 Again. 101 00:02:47,758 --> 00:02:48,793 But me and huretha didn't go on 102 00:02:48,793 --> 00:02:49,793 A date. We're just friends. 103 00:02:49,793 --> 00:02:51,379 >> bart: oh, c.J. 104 00:02:51,379 --> 00:02:53,000 Big girls need love, too. 105 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,620 Don't knock it till you try it. 106 00:02:54,620 --> 00:02:55,896 >> angel: yeah, calvin. 107 00:02:55,896 --> 00:02:56,862 And keenan. 108 00:02:56,862 --> 00:02:57,931 It's not cool to talk about a 109 00:02:57,931 --> 00:02:58,827 Woman's weight. 110 00:02:58,827 --> 00:02:59,758 And besides, you know beauty's 111 00:02:59,758 --> 00:03:00,827 Only skin-deep, right? 112 00:03:00,827 --> 00:03:02,275 >> calvin: yeah, but ugly 113 00:03:02,275 --> 00:03:04,655 [snorts] Is to the bone. 114 00:03:04,655 --> 00:03:05,827 >> angel: no wonder you can't 115 00:03:05,827 --> 00:03:06,862 Keep a woman. 116 00:03:06,862 --> 00:03:08,517 [ speaking spanish ] 117 00:03:08,517 --> 00:03:09,275 >> curtis: hey, angel. 118 00:03:09,275 --> 00:03:10,172 What'd I tell you about that 119 00:03:10,172 --> 00:03:11,000 Cussin'? 120 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:12,620 >> angel: [ mutters in spanish ] 121 00:03:12,620 --> 00:03:13,655 >> calvin: you know why she's 122 00:03:13,655 --> 00:03:14,586 Hard on me? 123 00:03:14,586 --> 00:03:15,724 'cause she loves me. 124 00:03:15,724 --> 00:03:18,068 >> angel: I heard that. 125 00:03:18,068 --> 00:03:19,241 >> c.J.: well, big or small, 126 00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:20,517 Huretha's the only woman I've 127 00:03:20,517 --> 00:03:22,103 Been out with since janine left, 128 00:03:22,103 --> 00:03:23,655 So I figure I'm ready now. 129 00:03:23,655 --> 00:03:25,034 >> bart: [ chuckles ] Oh, c.J. 130 00:03:25,034 --> 00:03:25,931 You mean I've had more dates 131 00:03:25,931 --> 00:03:26,931 Than you? 132 00:03:26,931 --> 00:03:28,172 >> keenan: yeah, bart, family 133 00:03:28,172 --> 00:03:29,448 Reunions don't count. 134 00:03:29,448 --> 00:03:31,172 >> bart: keenan! Keenan! 135 00:03:31,172 --> 00:03:32,620 That was my third cousin! 136 00:03:32,620 --> 00:03:33,620 I told you that in strict 137 00:03:33,620 --> 00:03:34,620 Confidence. 138 00:03:34,620 --> 00:03:36,172 >> keenan: that's nasty! 139 00:03:36,172 --> 00:03:37,137 >> calvin: tell you what, 140 00:03:37,137 --> 00:03:39,827 C.J. -- here's my little black 141 00:03:39,827 --> 00:03:41,068 Book. 142 00:03:41,068 --> 00:03:43,103 Now, there are some 10s in here 143 00:03:43,103 --> 00:03:45,862 That'll make your mouth water. 144 00:03:45,862 --> 00:03:47,620 She's a contortionist. 145 00:03:47,620 --> 00:03:48,517 >> c.J.: oh, wait a minute -- 146 00:03:48,517 --> 00:03:49,241 You got pictures? 147 00:03:49,241 --> 00:03:50,275 >> calvin: yes, sir. 148 00:03:50,275 --> 00:03:52,137 And she's a dancer. 149 00:03:52,137 --> 00:03:53,137 >> c.J.: oh, that's nice. 150 00:03:53,137 --> 00:03:54,206 >> calvin: and, she's a -- 151 00:03:54,206 --> 00:03:56,103 >> angel: you have a black book? 152 00:03:56,103 --> 00:03:57,862 I mean, how old are you? 153 00:03:57,862 --> 00:03:59,344 >> calvin: old enough, baby. 154 00:03:59,344 --> 00:04:01,379 >> angel: [ yelling in spanish ] 155 00:04:01,379 --> 00:04:03,000 >> curtis: angel! English! 156 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:04,758 English! English! 157 00:04:04,758 --> 00:04:06,482 >> c.J.: wow, it's like y'all 158 00:04:06,482 --> 00:04:07,517 Are married already. 159 00:04:07,517 --> 00:04:08,689 >> angel: chief, I'm gonna go 160 00:04:08,689 --> 00:04:09,758 Upstairs, okay? 161 00:04:09,758 --> 00:04:11,137 [ speaks spanish ] 162 00:04:11,137 --> 00:04:12,034 >> curtis: get that girl all 163 00:04:12,034 --> 00:04:13,137 Riled up like that. 164 00:04:13,137 --> 00:04:14,482 Y'all do it all the time. 165 00:04:14,482 --> 00:04:16,241 What you got, a black book? 166 00:04:16,241 --> 00:04:17,793 I ain't seen one of these since 167 00:04:17,793 --> 00:04:19,310 Ella burnt mine up. 168 00:04:19,310 --> 00:04:21,586 Matter of fact, is this mine? 169 00:04:21,586 --> 00:04:23,310 >> calvin: no. It's mine. 170 00:04:23,310 --> 00:04:24,344 >> c.J.: hey, unc, calvin's 171 00:04:24,344 --> 00:04:25,551 Gonna hook me up with a date. 172 00:04:25,551 --> 00:04:26,620 >> curtis: oh, come on, man. 173 00:04:26,620 --> 00:04:27,517 You don't want calvin's 174 00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:28,379 Leftovers. 175 00:04:28,379 --> 00:04:29,275 You need to let your uncle hook 176 00:04:29,275 --> 00:04:30,068 You up. 177 00:04:30,068 --> 00:04:31,068 >> calvin: please, pops. 178 00:04:31,068 --> 00:04:32,000 You don't have any game. 179 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,034 >> keenan: I know. 180 00:04:33,034 --> 00:04:35,068 His game is so old, he can't 181 00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:36,482 Even find the field. 182 00:04:36,482 --> 00:04:37,689 [ laughter ] 183 00:04:37,689 --> 00:04:38,827 >> curtis: ha. Ha ha. 184 00:04:38,827 --> 00:04:39,862 >> bart: he doesn't even have 185 00:04:39,862 --> 00:04:42,620 Tickets to his game! 186 00:04:42,620 --> 00:04:43,689 >> curtis: bart, do you even 187 00:04:43,689 --> 00:04:45,068 Know what we're talking about? 188 00:04:45,068 --> 00:04:46,344 >> bart: no. 189 00:04:46,344 --> 00:04:47,965 >> curtis: right. So shut up. 190 00:04:47,965 --> 00:04:50,034 Hey, I got enough game to know 191 00:04:50,034 --> 00:04:51,344 That dating a linebacker like 192 00:04:51,344 --> 00:04:54,310 Huretha is a personal foul. 193 00:04:54,310 --> 00:04:55,896 And a clip. 194 00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:57,379 Out of bounds. 195 00:04:57,379 --> 00:04:58,448 [ laughs ] 196 00:04:58,448 --> 00:04:59,551 >> c.J.: that's cold, unc. 197 00:04:59,551 --> 00:05:00,448 >> curtis: so is your bed at 198 00:05:00,448 --> 00:05:01,103 Night. 199 00:05:01,103 --> 00:05:02,344 >> all: oooh. 200 00:05:02,344 --> 00:05:03,379 Shank. 201 00:05:03,379 --> 00:05:05,413 >> curtis: [ shivers, laughs ] 202 00:05:05,413 --> 00:05:06,689 No, man, I'm telling you -- 203 00:05:06,689 --> 00:05:08,551 Bill's niece just moved to town. 204 00:05:08,551 --> 00:05:10,103 And she is fine, jack. 205 00:05:10,103 --> 00:05:11,551 She is fine! 206 00:05:11,551 --> 00:05:13,241 Let me hook you up, man. 207 00:05:13,241 --> 00:05:17,000 She got lips like angelina... 208 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:20,758 She got a face like halle... 209 00:05:20,758 --> 00:05:25,379 And legs like tina. 210 00:05:25,379 --> 00:05:26,620 >> c.J.: unc, hook that up, hook 211 00:05:26,620 --> 00:05:27,344 That up. 212 00:05:27,344 --> 00:05:28,137 >> curtis: she fine. 213 00:05:28,137 --> 00:05:29,068 I'm gonna call bill now. 214 00:05:29,068 --> 00:05:30,620 >> c.J.: okay. 215 00:05:30,620 --> 00:05:31,517 >> claretha: shouldn't 216 00:05:31,517 --> 00:05:32,448 Sister mason be here folding 217 00:05:32,448 --> 00:05:33,827 These brochures instead of us? 218 00:05:33,827 --> 00:05:34,620 >> ella: girl, she's in the 219 00:05:34,620 --> 00:05:35,586 Hospital. 220 00:05:35,586 --> 00:05:36,551 >> claretha: so? 221 00:05:36,551 --> 00:05:37,758 She's still got one good hand. 222 00:05:37,758 --> 00:05:38,724 >> ella: claretha, please. 223 00:05:38,724 --> 00:05:39,965 Look at this. Look at this. 224 00:05:39,965 --> 00:05:42,000 Can you believe aids is the 225 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,275 Second-leading cause of death 226 00:05:43,275 --> 00:05:46,103 For american women from ages 25 227 00:05:46,103 --> 00:05:47,862 To 44? 228 00:05:47,862 --> 00:05:48,793 >> claretha: well, thank god I'm 229 00:05:48,793 --> 00:05:50,413 45. 230 00:05:50,413 --> 00:05:51,655 >> ella: ha! 231 00:05:51,655 --> 00:05:53,310 Okay, why is it that I continue 232 00:05:53,310 --> 00:05:55,103 To grow older and you continue 233 00:05:55,103 --> 00:05:55,827 To get younger? 234 00:05:55,827 --> 00:05:57,172 >> claretha: ain't god good? 235 00:05:57,172 --> 00:05:59,655 >> ella: whatever. [ laughs ] 236 00:05:59,655 --> 00:06:00,827 Hello. 237 00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:02,241 Hey, how can I help you? 238 00:06:02,241 --> 00:06:03,275 >> karen: yeah, my name is 239 00:06:03,275 --> 00:06:04,758 Karen bentley, and I was reading 240 00:06:04,758 --> 00:06:05,965 In the church bulletin that the 241 00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:06,965 Women's ministry is holding an 242 00:06:06,965 --> 00:06:08,241 Aids workshop tomorrow. 243 00:06:08,241 --> 00:06:09,379 >> ella: yes, we are. 244 00:06:09,379 --> 00:06:10,310 >> karen: well, I would really 245 00:06:10,310 --> 00:06:11,310 Love to volunteer. 246 00:06:11,310 --> 00:06:12,137 >> ella: and, karen, we would 247 00:06:12,137 --> 00:06:13,379 Really love to have you. 248 00:06:13,379 --> 00:06:14,206 >> karen: great! 249 00:06:14,206 --> 00:06:15,172 >> ella: oh, I'm ella payne, 250 00:06:15,172 --> 00:06:16,482 And I am the secretary for the 251 00:06:16,482 --> 00:06:18,000 Women's ministry, and I run the 252 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:18,758 Help center. 253 00:06:18,758 --> 00:06:19,689 >> karen: nice to meet you. 254 00:06:19,689 --> 00:06:20,344 >> ella: please. 255 00:06:20,344 --> 00:06:21,206 >> claretha: I'm claretha 256 00:06:21,206 --> 00:06:23,413 Jenkins, former first lady 257 00:06:23,413 --> 00:06:25,172 And twice removed as head 258 00:06:25,172 --> 00:06:26,275 Of the women's ministry. 259 00:06:26,275 --> 00:06:28,068 >> karen: nice to meet you. 260 00:06:28,068 --> 00:06:29,172 >> ella: karen, these are our 261 00:06:29,172 --> 00:06:30,310 Brochures. 262 00:06:30,310 --> 00:06:32,586 >> karen: okay. Great. 263 00:06:32,586 --> 00:06:33,827 Okay, now, I've seen these 264 00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:35,206 Before. 265 00:06:35,206 --> 00:06:36,241 Are these what you're gonna pass 266 00:06:36,241 --> 00:06:37,344 Out tomorrow? 267 00:06:37,344 --> 00:06:38,275 >> claretha: yes. 268 00:06:38,275 --> 00:06:39,620 Is there a problem? 269 00:06:39,620 --> 00:06:40,931 >> karen: well, it's just that 270 00:06:40,931 --> 00:06:42,172 It only lists statistics. 271 00:06:42,172 --> 00:06:43,103 It doesn't say anything about 272 00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:44,379 Symptoms or the importance of 273 00:06:44,379 --> 00:06:45,758 Getting tested. 274 00:06:45,758 --> 00:06:47,413 >> ella: oh, I guess you're 275 00:06:47,413 --> 00:06:48,310 Right. 276 00:06:48,310 --> 00:06:49,482 >> karen: you know, I could 277 00:06:49,482 --> 00:06:50,310 Bring in some of my own 278 00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:51,206 Materials and pass them out 279 00:06:51,206 --> 00:06:52,275 Tomorrow. 280 00:06:52,275 --> 00:06:53,344 >> claretha: why do you have 281 00:06:53,344 --> 00:06:54,724 Materials on aids? 282 00:06:54,724 --> 00:06:55,896 >> karen: because I'm a nurse... 283 00:06:55,896 --> 00:06:57,551 >> ella: oh, okay, okay. 284 00:06:57,551 --> 00:06:58,793 >> karen: ...And I'm hiv 285 00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:00,275 Positive. 286 00:07:00,275 --> 00:07:02,379 >> claretha: oh. Good. 287 00:07:02,379 --> 00:07:03,793 Uh-huh. 288 00:07:03,793 --> 00:07:05,896 Uh, you know, you don't even 289 00:07:05,896 --> 00:07:07,241 Look sick. 290 00:07:07,241 --> 00:07:08,689 >> karen: most infected people 291 00:07:08,689 --> 00:07:10,000 Don't. 292 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,068 >> ella: and that is what we 293 00:07:11,068 --> 00:07:12,034 Need to know. 294 00:07:12,034 --> 00:07:13,206 So... 295 00:07:13,206 --> 00:07:15,034 Karen, can you speak to our 296 00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:16,034 Ladies tomorrow? 297 00:07:16,034 --> 00:07:17,034 >> karen: absolutely. 298 00:07:17,034 --> 00:07:18,137 I would love to, ella. 299 00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:19,551 >> ella: that's good. 300 00:07:19,551 --> 00:07:20,689 Thank you. 301 00:07:20,689 --> 00:07:21,620 Tomorrow. 302 00:07:21,620 --> 00:07:22,517 >> karen: yes, thank you. 303 00:07:22,517 --> 00:07:23,517 Thank you so much. 304 00:07:23,517 --> 00:07:24,482 It was nice meeting you, too, 305 00:07:24,482 --> 00:07:25,482 Claretha. 306 00:07:25,482 --> 00:07:26,551 >> claretha: oh, yeah, baby. 307 00:07:26,551 --> 00:07:27,586 It was nice meeting you, too. 308 00:07:27,586 --> 00:07:29,344 I'll see you tomorrow. 309 00:07:29,344 --> 00:07:30,413 >> karen: okay. 310 00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:31,344 >> ella: tomorrow, karen. 311 00:07:31,344 --> 00:07:32,241 Thank you. 312 00:07:32,241 --> 00:07:34,827 God bless you. 313 00:07:34,827 --> 00:07:36,827 Claretha, why didn't you shake 314 00:07:36,827 --> 00:07:38,000 Her hand the second time? 315 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,000 >> claretha: what? 316 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:40,275 I don't know her like that. 317 00:07:40,275 --> 00:07:42,172 Plus, I like giving air dap. 318 00:07:42,172 --> 00:07:43,310 I'm cool like that. 319 00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:44,482 >> ella: no, you scared like 320 00:07:44,482 --> 00:07:45,724 That. 321 00:07:45,724 --> 00:07:47,344 That. That's not nice. 322 00:07:47,344 --> 00:07:49,413 That's not nice. 323 00:07:49,413 --> 00:07:50,344 >> curtis: what you talking 324 00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:51,275 About, not your type. 325 00:07:51,275 --> 00:07:52,068 Fine as that woman is. 326 00:07:52,068 --> 00:07:52,931 How can a fine woman like that 327 00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:53,689 Not be your type? 328 00:07:53,689 --> 00:07:54,482 >> ella: call her "Fine" one 329 00:07:54,482 --> 00:07:55,965 More time, hear? 330 00:07:55,965 --> 00:07:58,379 >> c.J.: well, she, uh... 331 00:07:58,379 --> 00:08:00,413 She doesn't want a man. 332 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:01,413 >> curtis: what you talking 333 00:08:01,413 --> 00:08:02,620 About? All women need a man. 334 00:08:02,620 --> 00:08:04,000 All women need a man. 335 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:04,931 I know these women are 336 00:08:04,931 --> 00:08:06,000 Independent today, but all of 337 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:06,862 Them need a man. 338 00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,413 You know, cut the grass, fix a 339 00:08:08,413 --> 00:08:10,103 Flat...Wax that -- 340 00:08:10,103 --> 00:08:12,034 >> ella: curtis! 341 00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:13,000 >> c.J.: I didn't say she 342 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,655 Doesn't need a man. 343 00:08:14,655 --> 00:08:17,551 I said she doesn't want a man. 344 00:08:17,551 --> 00:08:19,103 She's a lesbian. 345 00:08:19,103 --> 00:08:20,827 >> curtis: so? 346 00:08:20,827 --> 00:08:23,241 Your auntie's one, too. 347 00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:24,344 Baby? 348 00:08:24,344 --> 00:08:25,310 Ain't nothing wrong with a woman 349 00:08:25,310 --> 00:08:26,551 Having a hobby. 350 00:08:26,551 --> 00:08:27,758 'cause you do them plays. 351 00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:28,758 You do them plays, don't you? 352 00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:31,310 Ain't you got your lesbian card? 353 00:08:31,310 --> 00:08:32,206 What was that one? 354 00:08:32,206 --> 00:08:33,551 "God, don't beat up my husband"? 355 00:08:33,551 --> 00:08:34,862 What was that one you did? 356 00:08:34,862 --> 00:08:36,413 >> ella: curtis, he said 357 00:08:36,413 --> 00:08:37,413 "Lesbian." 358 00:08:37,413 --> 00:08:38,586 She likes women. 359 00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:40,000 I'm a thespian. 360 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,344 I like plays. 361 00:08:41,344 --> 00:08:42,758 Get it? 362 00:08:42,758 --> 00:08:43,413 >> curtis: "Luh"? 363 00:08:43,413 --> 00:08:44,931 >> ella: "Luh." 364 00:08:44,931 --> 00:08:45,965 >> curtis: "Thuh." 365 00:08:45,965 --> 00:08:47,172 Whoo! 366 00:08:47,172 --> 00:08:48,310 I'm sorry, man. 367 00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:49,172 I didn't see that one coming. 368 00:08:49,172 --> 00:08:50,068 >> c.J.: it's okay. 369 00:08:50,068 --> 00:08:51,241 I'm cool with it. 370 00:08:51,241 --> 00:08:52,275 I might even hang out with her 371 00:08:52,275 --> 00:08:53,206 Again, you know? 372 00:08:53,206 --> 00:08:55,068 All right, good night, y'all. 373 00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:56,655 [ sighs ] 374 00:08:56,655 --> 00:08:58,586 >> curtis: I don't get it. 375 00:08:58,586 --> 00:09:01,034 How can a woman that fine be a 376 00:09:01,034 --> 00:09:01,758 Les-- 377 00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:02,862 >> ella: curtis! 378 00:09:02,862 --> 00:09:03,965 You think I'm playing with you, 379 00:09:03,965 --> 00:09:04,689 Don't you? 380 00:09:04,689 --> 00:09:05,655 >> curtis: what? I didn't say -- 381 00:09:05,655 --> 00:09:06,724 >> ella: call her "Fine" one 382 00:09:06,724 --> 00:09:07,689 More time. 383 00:09:07,689 --> 00:09:11,000 Don't do it. 384 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,586 >> curtis: fine. 385 00:09:14,586 --> 00:09:15,551 Look here. 386 00:09:15,551 --> 00:09:17,172 Since c.J. Is lonely and 387 00:09:17,172 --> 00:09:18,310 Borderline pathetic... 388 00:09:18,310 --> 00:09:19,482 >> c.J.: thanks, unc. 389 00:09:19,482 --> 00:09:20,793 >> curtis: I love you. 390 00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:22,000 ...Here's what we're gonna do. 391 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,241 Anybody that can get c.J. A 392 00:09:23,241 --> 00:09:24,896 Perfect date is gonna get the 393 00:09:24,896 --> 00:09:25,551 Day off. 394 00:09:25,551 --> 00:09:27,034 >> angel: the perfect date? 395 00:09:27,034 --> 00:09:28,000 Sorry. 396 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,344 I'm not available. 397 00:09:29,344 --> 00:09:30,413 >> bart: neither am I. 398 00:09:30,413 --> 00:09:31,586 >> curtis: shut up, bart. 399 00:09:31,586 --> 00:09:32,689 Okay, she don't have to be 400 00:09:32,689 --> 00:09:33,482 Perfect. 401 00:09:33,482 --> 00:09:34,517 She don't have to be perfect -- 402 00:09:34,517 --> 00:09:35,413 Just breathing. 403 00:09:35,413 --> 00:09:36,931 You can't be too choicy, your 404 00:09:36,931 --> 00:09:37,655 Situation. 405 00:09:37,655 --> 00:09:38,344 >> c.J.: thanks again. 406 00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:39,034 >> curtis: I love you. 407 00:09:39,034 --> 00:09:39,862 That's why I do it. 408 00:09:39,862 --> 00:09:40,793 >> calvin: breathing is the 409 00:09:40,793 --> 00:09:41,689 Only requirement? 410 00:09:41,689 --> 00:09:42,689 Well, shoot, let's go down to 411 00:09:42,689 --> 00:09:43,620 The corner of ponce and 412 00:09:43,620 --> 00:09:44,758 Boulevard. 413 00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:46,310 Y'all got cash, right? 414 00:09:46,310 --> 00:09:47,000 >> curtis: ha! 415 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,620 "You got cash to go to ponce"! 416 00:09:48,620 --> 00:09:50,931 Sit down and shut up. 417 00:09:50,931 --> 00:09:52,413 Okay, you know what? 418 00:09:52,413 --> 00:09:53,379 I'm gonna change the stakes a 419 00:09:53,379 --> 00:09:54,034 Little bit. 420 00:09:54,034 --> 00:09:56,344 Day off with pay. 421 00:09:56,344 --> 00:09:57,862 >> keenan: oh! 422 00:09:57,862 --> 00:09:58,758 Now we're talking. 423 00:09:58,758 --> 00:10:01,172 >> curtis: yeah, you heard that. 424 00:10:01,172 --> 00:10:02,413 >> c.J.: y'all got women lined 425 00:10:02,413 --> 00:10:03,862 Up all the way around the block, 426 00:10:03,862 --> 00:10:05,448 Man. What y'all do? 427 00:10:05,448 --> 00:10:07,551 Man. What y'all do? Ha ha! 428 00:10:07,551 --> 00:10:11,620 Ha ha! 429 00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:13,344 >> c.J.: how can I possibly 430 00:10:13,344 --> 00:10:14,793 Choose one from all them women? 431 00:10:14,793 --> 00:10:15,724 >> calvin: hold up. 432 00:10:15,724 --> 00:10:16,586 Who said you had to pick just 433 00:10:16,586 --> 00:10:17,379 One? 434 00:10:17,379 --> 00:10:18,206 >> c.J.: I could get three or 435 00:10:18,206 --> 00:10:19,137 Four. 436 00:10:19,137 --> 00:10:20,034 >> angel: c.J.! 437 00:10:20,034 --> 00:10:21,068 Because one is enough. 438 00:10:21,068 --> 00:10:21,931 [ speaks spanish ] 439 00:10:21,931 --> 00:10:25,758 >> calvin: you know you want me. 440 00:10:25,758 --> 00:10:26,724 No, it's okay. 441 00:10:26,724 --> 00:10:27,793 She just likes it rough, that's 442 00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:28,620 All. 443 00:10:28,620 --> 00:10:30,965 >> keenan: hey, why don't we set 444 00:10:30,965 --> 00:10:32,344 Up speed dates so c.J. Can 445 00:10:32,344 --> 00:10:33,000 Decide? 446 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,103 >> c.J.: okay! That'll work. 447 00:10:34,103 --> 00:10:35,896 >> curtis: good idea, good idea. 448 00:10:35,896 --> 00:10:37,931 >> c.J.: hey, bart, this is what 449 00:10:37,931 --> 00:10:38,827 I want you to do. 450 00:10:38,827 --> 00:10:40,000 I want you to go out there, and 451 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,275 I want you to screen the girls, 452 00:10:41,275 --> 00:10:42,137 All right? 453 00:10:42,137 --> 00:10:43,000 So when you see the ones that 454 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:44,413 You like, bring me the other 455 00:10:44,413 --> 00:10:45,241 Ones. 456 00:10:45,241 --> 00:10:46,206 >> bart: cool! 457 00:10:46,206 --> 00:10:47,413 That leaves more for me. 458 00:10:47,413 --> 00:10:48,655 >> c.J.: and, unc, why don't you 459 00:10:48,655 --> 00:10:50,448 Time everything and blow the 460 00:10:50,448 --> 00:10:51,413 Whistle and say "Next." 461 00:10:51,413 --> 00:10:52,517 Keep it moving on. 462 00:10:52,517 --> 00:10:53,827 Got the whistle? 463 00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:55,068 >> curtis: right here. 464 00:10:55,068 --> 00:10:56,275 >> c.J.: okay. 465 00:10:56,275 --> 00:10:57,275 >> keenan: introducing 466 00:10:57,275 --> 00:10:58,896 Flexible felicia! 467 00:10:58,896 --> 00:11:02,896 >> curtis: ooh hoo! 468 00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:05,655 >> c.J.: look at that. 469 00:11:05,655 --> 00:11:06,931 You must be calvin's friend, 470 00:11:06,931 --> 00:11:08,172 The contortionist. 471 00:11:08,172 --> 00:11:09,827 Hi, I'm c.J. 472 00:11:09,827 --> 00:11:11,448 How you know I like toes? 473 00:11:11,448 --> 00:11:12,379 Ha ha! 474 00:11:12,379 --> 00:11:13,482 Listen, tell me about yourself. 475 00:11:13,482 --> 00:11:16,034 [ whistle blowing ] 476 00:11:16,034 --> 00:11:16,896 >> curtis: next! 477 00:11:16,896 --> 00:11:18,586 >> c.J.: but she flexible. 478 00:11:18,586 --> 00:11:19,551 >> curtis: you don't even know 479 00:11:19,551 --> 00:11:20,758 What to do with that. 480 00:11:20,758 --> 00:11:21,620 >> c.J.: she flexible. 481 00:11:21,620 --> 00:11:22,689 >> curtis: she'll hurt you. 482 00:11:22,689 --> 00:11:23,586 Go ahead on, baby. 483 00:11:23,586 --> 00:11:24,413 That's nice, though. 484 00:11:24,413 --> 00:11:25,275 That's real nice. That's a gift. 485 00:11:25,275 --> 00:11:26,172 >> calvin: sorry, baby. 486 00:11:26,172 --> 00:11:27,310 But stay limber, okay? 487 00:11:27,310 --> 00:11:28,275 Call me. 488 00:11:28,275 --> 00:11:29,655 >> c.J.: that's was all right. 489 00:11:29,655 --> 00:11:31,000 She put the leg -- she put the 490 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,034 Leg back there. 491 00:11:32,034 --> 00:11:33,000 >> keenan: introducing 492 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,517 Christina locklear! 493 00:11:34,517 --> 00:11:35,448 >> c.J.: yeah, 494 00:11:35,448 --> 00:11:36,275 Christina locklear. 495 00:11:36,275 --> 00:11:38,172 Oh! What the hell? 496 00:11:38,172 --> 00:11:40,517 Uh, miss...Ter. 497 00:11:40,517 --> 00:11:42,551 There's some confusion, 'cause 498 00:11:42,551 --> 00:11:44,241 I only date women. 499 00:11:44,241 --> 00:11:45,620 Bart, I thought you were 500 00:11:45,620 --> 00:11:46,620 Screening 'em! 501 00:11:46,620 --> 00:11:47,862 >> bart: well, he said he was 502 00:11:47,862 --> 00:11:49,103 Having an operation soon. 503 00:11:49,103 --> 00:11:50,103 I wanted to give you a 504 00:11:50,103 --> 00:11:52,724 Selection. 505 00:11:52,724 --> 00:11:54,413 >> c.J.: blow the whistle. 506 00:11:54,413 --> 00:11:56,896 Unc, blow the whistle. 507 00:11:56,896 --> 00:11:58,517 Blow the whistle! 508 00:11:58,517 --> 00:11:59,413 >> curtis: c.J., why don't you 509 00:11:59,413 --> 00:12:00,413 Get to know him? 510 00:12:00,413 --> 00:12:01,517 He might be a nice lady. 511 00:12:01,517 --> 00:12:02,793 >> c.J.: will you... 512 00:12:02,793 --> 00:12:05,172 >> curtis: [ laughs ] 513 00:12:05,172 --> 00:12:06,931 You know you can't be picky. 514 00:12:06,931 --> 00:12:09,551 [ whistle blows ] 515 00:12:09,551 --> 00:12:11,724 Sorry, rupaul. 516 00:12:11,724 --> 00:12:13,413 [ laughs ] 517 00:12:13,413 --> 00:12:15,103 >> c.J.: he big, he big. 518 00:12:15,103 --> 00:12:16,413 >> curtis: ooh-whee. 519 00:12:16,413 --> 00:12:17,896 He almost big as huretha. 520 00:12:17,896 --> 00:12:19,068 >> keenan: introducing 521 00:12:19,068 --> 00:12:20,931 Miss chang. 522 00:12:20,931 --> 00:12:23,206 [ whistle blows ] 523 00:12:23,206 --> 00:12:24,896 >> c.J.: yeah. Hey. 524 00:12:24,896 --> 00:12:26,689 Hi, I'm c.J. 525 00:12:26,689 --> 00:12:27,793 >> suequita: what up, son? 526 00:12:27,793 --> 00:12:28,586 I'm suequita. 527 00:12:28,586 --> 00:12:29,724 You the fireman with benefits 528 00:12:29,724 --> 00:12:30,655 Looking for a wifey? 529 00:12:30,655 --> 00:12:31,758 >> c.J.: uh, well... 530 00:12:31,758 --> 00:12:32,724 >> suequita: what y'all be doing 531 00:12:32,724 --> 00:12:33,655 Up in here when there ain't no 532 00:12:33,655 --> 00:12:34,586 Fire? 533 00:12:34,586 --> 00:12:35,448 >> c.J.: during the time that 534 00:12:35,448 --> 00:12:37,448 We're not working, we like to 535 00:12:37,448 --> 00:12:39,482 Watch television. 536 00:12:39,482 --> 00:12:41,344 And we play cards. 537 00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:42,034 >> suequita: you watch 538 00:12:42,034 --> 00:12:42,862 Television, play cards? 539 00:12:42,862 --> 00:12:43,793 >> c.J.: we play chess. 540 00:12:43,793 --> 00:12:44,758 Unc plays chess. 541 00:12:44,758 --> 00:12:45,620 >> suequita: y'all a bunch of 542 00:12:45,620 --> 00:12:46,517 Squares. 543 00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:47,275 Straight up l-7s, yo. 544 00:12:47,275 --> 00:12:48,172 No wonder you don't got no 545 00:12:48,172 --> 00:12:49,068 Wives. 546 00:12:49,068 --> 00:12:49,931 I don't want to be your wife, 547 00:12:49,931 --> 00:12:50,724 Either. 548 00:12:50,724 --> 00:12:51,724 You don't got no music up in 549 00:12:51,724 --> 00:12:52,586 Here? 550 00:12:52,586 --> 00:12:53,448 >> c.J.: listen, kimora. 551 00:12:53,448 --> 00:12:54,103 Um... 552 00:12:54,103 --> 00:12:54,862 We, uh... 553 00:12:54,862 --> 00:12:55,724 We were looking for somebody 554 00:12:55,724 --> 00:12:56,551 Who speaks english. 555 00:12:56,551 --> 00:12:57,310 >> suequita: oh, you want 556 00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:58,482 Someone who speaks english? 557 00:12:58,482 --> 00:12:59,758 Is that an asian dis, son? 558 00:12:59,758 --> 00:13:01,000 I amspeaking english! 559 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:02,034 Shoot, tell me I ain't speaking 560 00:13:02,034 --> 00:13:02,931 English. 561 00:13:02,931 --> 00:13:03,827 [ whistle blowing ] 562 00:13:03,827 --> 00:13:04,724 >> c.J.: back up off me. 563 00:13:04,724 --> 00:13:05,586 >> curtis: jacqueline chan, hold 564 00:13:05,586 --> 00:13:06,551 On. 565 00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:07,344 >> suequita: what are you 566 00:13:07,344 --> 00:13:08,137 Blowing your whistle for? 567 00:13:08,137 --> 00:13:09,000 >> curtis: because we need you 568 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,137 Be gone now, son. 569 00:13:11,137 --> 00:13:12,689 Bye. 570 00:13:12,689 --> 00:13:13,896 >> suequita: get your hands off 571 00:13:13,896 --> 00:13:14,551 Me! 572 00:13:14,551 --> 00:13:15,724 I don't need you to touch me. 573 00:13:15,724 --> 00:13:16,965 Shoot! 574 00:13:16,965 --> 00:13:17,793 >> keenan: introducing 575 00:13:17,793 --> 00:13:21,000 Mary "Mother of agnes" scott. 576 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,413 >> curtis: your knees gonna get 577 00:13:22,413 --> 00:13:24,068 Dirty. 578 00:13:24,068 --> 00:13:25,206 Hey, hey! 579 00:13:25,206 --> 00:13:26,689 What the hell? 580 00:13:26,689 --> 00:13:29,758 [ bellows ] 581 00:13:29,758 --> 00:13:31,379 >> c.J.: will you get her out of 582 00:13:31,379 --> 00:13:32,275 Here? 583 00:13:32,275 --> 00:13:33,103 >> curtis: here, bless you. 584 00:13:33,103 --> 00:13:33,965 Bless you. 585 00:13:33,965 --> 00:13:35,000 Now, go on. 586 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,206 Go on! 587 00:13:36,206 --> 00:13:37,896 Will you go? 588 00:13:37,896 --> 00:13:40,586 Go! 589 00:13:40,586 --> 00:13:42,103 Go on and be with god. 590 00:13:42,103 --> 00:13:43,379 >> calvin: it was holy water. 591 00:13:43,379 --> 00:13:44,551 >> curtis: it's holy. 592 00:13:44,551 --> 00:13:45,482 >> karen: do you know why 593 00:13:45,482 --> 00:13:46,482 African-american women are 594 00:13:46,482 --> 00:13:48,103 16% more likely to contract 595 00:13:48,103 --> 00:13:49,206 Aids? 596 00:13:49,206 --> 00:13:50,241 >> claretha: I do. 597 00:13:50,241 --> 00:13:51,551 It's because of those down-low 598 00:13:51,551 --> 00:13:52,379 Brothers. 599 00:13:52,379 --> 00:13:53,448 I heard about them on "Oprah." 600 00:13:53,448 --> 00:13:54,862 >> karen: actually, the reason 601 00:13:54,862 --> 00:13:56,172 Is because of denial and 602 00:13:56,172 --> 00:13:57,896 Ignorance. 603 00:13:57,896 --> 00:13:59,379 Look, basically, 604 00:13:59,379 --> 00:14:00,896 African-american women are in 605 00:14:00,896 --> 00:14:02,034 Denial, okay? 606 00:14:02,034 --> 00:14:03,000 They don't think they can get 607 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,172 Aids, so they don't use 608 00:14:04,172 --> 00:14:05,103 Protection. 609 00:14:05,103 --> 00:14:06,000 And we're ignorant because we 610 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,620 Fail to get tested. 611 00:14:07,620 --> 00:14:08,827 Raise your hand if you've ever 612 00:14:08,827 --> 00:14:10,931 Been tested for aids. 613 00:14:10,931 --> 00:14:12,827 >> ella: put your hand down. 614 00:14:12,827 --> 00:14:15,000 That was for cholesterol. 615 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:16,482 >> claretha: they took blood. 616 00:14:16,482 --> 00:14:17,310 >> karen: see, this is what 617 00:14:17,310 --> 00:14:18,068 I'm talking about. 618 00:14:18,068 --> 00:14:18,896 Only two of you raised your 619 00:14:18,896 --> 00:14:19,793 Hands. 620 00:14:19,793 --> 00:14:20,931 Do you realize that it takes 621 00:14:20,931 --> 00:14:22,310 8 to 10 years for some 622 00:14:22,310 --> 00:14:23,482 People to show the symptoms of 623 00:14:23,482 --> 00:14:24,724 Hiv? 624 00:14:24,724 --> 00:14:25,655 So you could be spreading the 625 00:14:25,655 --> 00:14:27,689 Disease without even knowing it. 626 00:14:27,689 --> 00:14:29,000 Look, the only way for you to 627 00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,724 Know for sure is for you and 628 00:14:30,724 --> 00:14:32,482 Your partner to get tested. 629 00:14:32,482 --> 00:14:34,103 Okay, we're gonna take a 630 00:14:34,103 --> 00:14:35,413 20-minute break. 631 00:14:35,413 --> 00:14:36,482 And when we return, I will 632 00:14:36,482 --> 00:14:38,000 Discuss the symptoms of hiv. 633 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,000 >> ella: yes. 634 00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:41,068 Ladies, please help yourselves 635 00:14:41,068 --> 00:14:43,827 To cookies and punch. 636 00:14:43,827 --> 00:14:45,000 Whoo! 637 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,517 This is good, isn't it? 638 00:14:46,517 --> 00:14:50,517 Claretha. 639 00:14:50,517 --> 00:14:53,448 Karen is doing an excellent job. 640 00:14:53,448 --> 00:14:54,758 >> claretha: yeah, she is. 641 00:14:54,758 --> 00:14:56,137 She really is. 642 00:14:56,137 --> 00:14:58,413 Ooh, girl, I better go over here 643 00:14:58,413 --> 00:15:00,275 Get me an oatmeal cookie before 644 00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:01,413 These greedy women wolf them 645 00:15:01,413 --> 00:15:02,413 All down. 646 00:15:02,413 --> 00:15:03,379 >> karen: here you go. 647 00:15:03,379 --> 00:15:04,137 You can have some of mine. 648 00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:05,000 I don't need all these. 649 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:05,793 >> claretha: oh, that's all 650 00:15:05,793 --> 00:15:06,620 Right. 651 00:15:06,620 --> 00:15:08,448 I really prefer chocolate chip. 652 00:15:08,448 --> 00:15:10,000 >> karen: okay. Suit yourself. 653 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:13,310 >> claretha: okay. 654 00:15:13,310 --> 00:15:14,793 >> ella: claretha, why didn't 655 00:15:14,793 --> 00:15:16,206 You take that cookie? 656 00:15:16,206 --> 00:15:17,206 >> claretha: I just said I 657 00:15:17,206 --> 00:15:18,862 Prefer chocolate chip. 658 00:15:18,862 --> 00:15:20,310 Plus, you know, I need to 659 00:15:20,310 --> 00:15:21,206 Watch my figure. 660 00:15:21,206 --> 00:15:23,551 >> ella: oh, no, no, no. 661 00:15:23,551 --> 00:15:24,965 You're not fooling nobody. 662 00:15:24,965 --> 00:15:26,241 You're treating karen like she 663 00:15:26,241 --> 00:15:27,206 Has -- 664 00:15:27,206 --> 00:15:28,241 >> claretha: what? Aids? 665 00:15:28,241 --> 00:15:30,344 >> ella: she does not have aids. 666 00:15:30,344 --> 00:15:32,413 She's hiv positive. 667 00:15:32,413 --> 00:15:33,689 >> claretha: same thing. 668 00:15:33,689 --> 00:15:34,793 >> ella: no, it isn't. 669 00:15:34,793 --> 00:15:37,000 You can spread a cold faster 670 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,310 Than hiv. 671 00:15:38,310 --> 00:15:39,379 >> claretha: really? 672 00:15:39,379 --> 00:15:40,482 >> ella: claretha, look at this. 673 00:15:40,482 --> 00:15:41,689 Did you see it? 674 00:15:41,689 --> 00:15:43,000 You cannot get the virus from 675 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,793 Saliva, tears, sweat, shaking 676 00:15:44,793 --> 00:15:46,655 Hands, kissing. 677 00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:48,172 >> claretha: oh. 678 00:15:48,172 --> 00:15:49,793 I guess I am a little ignorant, 679 00:15:49,793 --> 00:15:50,620 Huh? 680 00:15:50,620 --> 00:15:51,655 >> ella: yes! I mean, well -- 681 00:15:51,655 --> 00:15:53,448 You know what? No. 682 00:15:53,448 --> 00:15:55,482 Ignorant is not knowing. 683 00:15:55,482 --> 00:15:58,827 You just plain "Ig'nant." 684 00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:00,551 >> claretha: I'm sorry. 685 00:16:00,551 --> 00:16:03,206 >> ella: you should be. 686 00:16:03,206 --> 00:16:04,344 >> keenan: introducing 687 00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:06,517 Miss major ette! 688 00:16:06,517 --> 00:16:07,896 >> c.J.: hey, she fine. 689 00:16:07,896 --> 00:16:09,137 She fine. 690 00:16:09,137 --> 00:16:10,482 >> bart: ♪ oh, when the saints ♪ 691 00:16:10,482 --> 00:16:12,275 ♪ go marching in ♪ 692 00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:13,413 ♪ oh, when the saints 693 00:16:13,413 --> 00:16:15,931 Go marching in ♪ 694 00:16:15,931 --> 00:16:18,241 ♪ how I long to be in that 695 00:16:18,241 --> 00:16:19,379 Number ♪ 696 00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,241 >> c.J.: unc, blow the whistle. 697 00:16:20,241 --> 00:16:21,137 >> bart: ♪ when the saints go 698 00:16:21,137 --> 00:16:22,310 Marching in ♪ 699 00:16:22,310 --> 00:16:23,586 >> c.J.: uncle curtis! 700 00:16:23,586 --> 00:16:25,034 >> curtis: I like this song. 701 00:16:25,034 --> 00:16:27,482 >> c.J.: blow the whistle. 702 00:16:27,482 --> 00:16:34,448 [ whistle blowing ] 703 00:16:34,448 --> 00:16:35,724 >> curtis: march it out! 704 00:16:35,724 --> 00:16:37,275 >> c.J.: man! You know what? 705 00:16:37,275 --> 00:16:38,689 I can't even do this no more, 706 00:16:38,689 --> 00:16:39,517 Man. 707 00:16:39,517 --> 00:16:40,724 I can't see no more women. 708 00:16:40,724 --> 00:16:42,310 I don't care who is back there. 709 00:16:42,310 --> 00:16:43,482 I don't want to see no more 710 00:16:43,482 --> 00:16:44,413 Women. 711 00:16:44,413 --> 00:16:45,206 >> angel: really? 712 00:16:45,206 --> 00:16:46,241 Well, I guess I'll just have to 713 00:16:46,241 --> 00:16:47,310 Send my friend amber back. 714 00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:48,275 >> c.J.: I guess we could see 715 00:16:48,275 --> 00:16:50,379 One more. 716 00:16:50,379 --> 00:16:52,000 One more ain't gonna hurt. 717 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,034 Yeah, amber. 718 00:16:53,034 --> 00:16:54,482 Hey. How you doing? 719 00:16:54,482 --> 00:16:55,379 >> amber: great. 720 00:16:55,379 --> 00:16:56,517 >> c.J.: all right. 721 00:16:56,517 --> 00:16:57,482 >> amber: thanks for agreeing to 722 00:16:57,482 --> 00:16:58,379 Meet me. 723 00:16:58,379 --> 00:16:59,551 I'm a little nervous because 724 00:16:59,551 --> 00:17:00,758 This is my first date since my 725 00:17:00,758 --> 00:17:01,689 Breakup. 726 00:17:01,689 --> 00:17:02,896 >> c.J.: me too. Uh-huh 727 00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:05,310 So, tell me about yourself. 728 00:17:05,310 --> 00:17:06,758 >> amber: well, I'm a dentist, 729 00:17:06,758 --> 00:17:08,896 And in my spare time I volunteer 730 00:17:08,896 --> 00:17:10,206 At the boys & girls club. 731 00:17:10,206 --> 00:17:11,000 >> c.J.: you like kids? 732 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,275 >> amber: yeah, I love kids. 733 00:17:12,275 --> 00:17:13,862 >> c.J.: ha ha! 734 00:17:13,862 --> 00:17:14,931 >> curtis: she like kids. 735 00:17:14,931 --> 00:17:16,103 >> c.J.: you like kids. 736 00:17:16,103 --> 00:17:16,862 Yeah. 737 00:17:16,862 --> 00:17:18,379 >> amber: I also love camping, 738 00:17:18,379 --> 00:17:20,034 Cooking, going to the movies, 739 00:17:20,034 --> 00:17:21,034 Ice-skating. 740 00:17:21,034 --> 00:17:22,000 >> c.J.: what? 741 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,000 You like all that? 742 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,000 >> amber: uh, what are you 743 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,862 Doing? 744 00:17:26,862 --> 00:17:27,724 >> c.J.: you're too good to be 745 00:17:27,724 --> 00:17:28,724 True, girl. 746 00:17:28,724 --> 00:17:29,724 I know ashton kutcher 'bout to 747 00:17:29,724 --> 00:17:30,793 Jump out and be like, "You're 748 00:17:30,793 --> 00:17:32,000 Punk'd!" 749 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,000 [ laughter ] 750 00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:34,413 I know he gonna get me. 751 00:17:34,413 --> 00:17:36,586 [ laughs ] Well... 752 00:17:36,586 --> 00:17:37,827 >> amber: I like a man with a 753 00:17:37,827 --> 00:17:38,655 Good sense of humor. 754 00:17:38,655 --> 00:17:39,793 >> c.J.: that's right. 755 00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:41,000 Let's talk some more over 756 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:41,758 Dinner. 757 00:17:41,758 --> 00:17:42,724 >> amber: okay. Sushi? 758 00:17:42,724 --> 00:17:43,896 >> c.J.: you like sushi? 759 00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,551 Man, it's... [ laughs ] 760 00:17:45,551 --> 00:17:46,586 Wow. 761 00:17:46,586 --> 00:17:47,896 I really can't stay out too 762 00:17:47,896 --> 00:17:48,655 Late, though. 763 00:17:48,655 --> 00:17:50,172 I got to get home to my kids. 764 00:17:50,172 --> 00:17:51,931 It's been hard raising them by 765 00:17:51,931 --> 00:17:53,379 Myself and everything ever 766 00:17:53,379 --> 00:17:55,068 Since my ex-wife got hooked on 767 00:17:55,068 --> 00:17:57,275 Crack and burned down our house. 768 00:17:57,275 --> 00:17:58,275 [ whistle blowing ] 769 00:17:58,275 --> 00:17:59,586 She left me with a ton of debt. 770 00:17:59,586 --> 00:18:00,517 Man, it's just been hard. 771 00:18:00,517 --> 00:18:01,758 I had to move in with my aunt 772 00:18:01,758 --> 00:18:05,551 And uncle. It's crazy. 773 00:18:05,551 --> 00:18:07,206 Where amber go? 774 00:18:07,206 --> 00:18:08,344 >> curtis: I got one word for 775 00:18:08,344 --> 00:18:11,965 You -- less is more. 776 00:18:11,965 --> 00:18:13,827 >> ella: karen, you did a 777 00:18:13,827 --> 00:18:15,413 Fabulous job! 778 00:18:15,413 --> 00:18:16,862 Thank you for coming. 779 00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:18,137 >> karen: oh, it was my 780 00:18:18,137 --> 00:18:18,931 Pleasure, ella. 781 00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:20,206 Thank you. 782 00:18:20,206 --> 00:18:21,517 You really did a great job 783 00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:22,655 Putting this workshop together. 784 00:18:22,655 --> 00:18:24,000 >> ella: thank god. 785 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:24,689 [ both laugh ] 786 00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:26,137 >> claretha: you both did. 787 00:18:26,137 --> 00:18:29,724 Karen, thank you very much. 788 00:18:29,724 --> 00:18:31,689 I want you to know that our 789 00:18:31,689 --> 00:18:34,000 Church is lucky to have you. 790 00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,068 >> karen: thank you. 791 00:18:35,068 --> 00:18:36,172 >> claretha: ella, I'll wait for 792 00:18:36,172 --> 00:18:36,931 You in the car. 793 00:18:36,931 --> 00:18:38,724 >> ella: okay, babe. 794 00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:39,862 >> karen: ella, I really have to 795 00:18:39,862 --> 00:18:40,862 Thank you for speaking to 796 00:18:40,862 --> 00:18:42,103 Claretha. 797 00:18:42,103 --> 00:18:44,000 >> ella: what do you mean? 798 00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:44,896 >> karen: at first, she wouldn't 799 00:18:44,896 --> 00:18:46,310 Even touch me -- and she just 800 00:18:46,310 --> 00:18:47,758 Shook my hand? 801 00:18:47,758 --> 00:18:48,965 I know it was you. 802 00:18:48,965 --> 00:18:50,793 >> ella: on behalf of my friend, 803 00:18:50,793 --> 00:18:52,068 I am so sorry. 804 00:18:52,068 --> 00:18:53,758 She really didn't mean you any 805 00:18:53,758 --> 00:18:54,758 Harm. 806 00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:55,931 >> karen: it's all right. 807 00:18:55,931 --> 00:18:57,827 I deal with it all the time. 808 00:18:57,827 --> 00:18:59,517 >> ella: well, maybe one day, 809 00:18:59,517 --> 00:19:01,310 It'll just get better. 810 00:19:01,310 --> 00:19:02,344 >> karen: amen to that. 811 00:19:02,344 --> 00:19:03,689 >> ella: amen to that. 812 00:19:03,689 --> 00:19:04,551 Thank you, baby. 813 00:19:04,551 --> 00:19:06,517 >> karen: thank you. 814 00:19:06,517 --> 00:19:07,103 >> ella: god bless you. 51746

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