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[ indistinct arguing ]
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>> ella: what's going on?!
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[ arguing continues ]
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What's going on, guys?
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What's going on?
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Quiet!
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C.J., what happened?
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>> curtis: why does he get to go
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First?
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>> ella: because I said so.
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>> c.J.: well, ms. Claretha's
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Daughter, huretha, she asked me
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If I wanted to go to the
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Alicia keys concert.
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You know how much I love alicia.
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So I went.
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>> ella: okay, so what's the
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Problem?
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>> curtis: the problem is him
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Having to take out "Huge-retha"
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Is cruel and unusual punishment.
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And c.J.'s been through enough!
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>> ella: but, curtis, he just
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Said he wanted to go.
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And why would you say something
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So mean about huretha?
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>> curtis: because it's the
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Truth, ella!
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It's the truth, huh!
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Do you know that she made them
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Go to porky's rib shack, where
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She closed down the "Buff-ett"?
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The whole "Buff-ett," ella!
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Nobody else could eat nothing,
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Ella!
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>> claretha: no, no.
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>> curtis: and then on top of
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That, he took her to the store,
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Where she hooked up a siphon to
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The soda machine and sucked up
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All the slushies!
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No slushies for the kids, ella!
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>> claretha: wrong, wrong,
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Wrong!
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First of all, it wasn't porky's
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Rib shack -- it was hog heaven.
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And second, she did not close
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Down the "Buff-ett" from
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Anybody.
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Third, huretha does not even
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Drink slushies.
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She always washes down her food
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With a little sip of diet soda.
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>> curtis: she's delusional.
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She's delusional.
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She in her own world, ella.
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Did you know that c.J. Had to
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Pay $30 for valet -- you didn't
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Know I knew that, did you?
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$30 for valet 'cause huretha
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[grunts] Couldn't walk her big
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Behind 20 feet across the
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Parking lot.
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>> claretha: wrong, wrong again.
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It wasn't $30. It was $29.50.
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And it was the only parking that
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Was left.
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>> ella: okay.
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How do y'all know all of this?
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>> c.J.: 'cause they followed
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Us!
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>> ella: what?!
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Why were y'all following them?
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>> curtis: protection.
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>> claretha: for protection.
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Anyway, we all know c.J.'s on
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The rebound, and I didn't want
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Him to take advantage of my
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Baby.
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>> curtis: how the hell he gonna
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Take advantage?!
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She outweigh him by two grown
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Folk and a midget!
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Every time she walk outside,
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The earth tilts!
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>> ella: curtis!
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>> curtis: everybody be like,
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"Come on inside, come on
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"Come on inside, come on
Inside."
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Inside."
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>> calvin: ah, there he is.
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C.J., c.J.
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So I hear you're back on the
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Market again...In a bigway.
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>> keenan: yeah,
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Double-dating...The same girl.
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>> c.J.: ha ha.
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Very funny.
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Yeah, I decided to start dating
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Again.
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But me and huretha didn't go on
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A date. We're just friends.
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>> bart: oh, c.J.
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Big girls need love, too.
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Don't knock it till you try it.
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>> angel: yeah, calvin.
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And keenan.
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It's not cool to talk about a
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Woman's weight.
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And besides, you know beauty's
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Only skin-deep, right?
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>> calvin: yeah, but ugly
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[snorts] Is to the bone.
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>> angel: no wonder you can't
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Keep a woman.
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[ speaking spanish ]
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>> curtis: hey, angel.
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What'd I tell you about that
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Cussin'?
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>> angel: [ mutters in spanish ]
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>> calvin: you know why she's
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Hard on me?
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'cause she loves me.
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>> angel: I heard that.
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>> c.J.: well, big or small,
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Huretha's the only woman I've
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Been out with since janine left,
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So I figure I'm ready now.
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>> bart: [ chuckles ] Oh, c.J.
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You mean I've had more dates
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Than you?
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>> keenan: yeah, bart, family
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Reunions don't count.
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>> bart: keenan! Keenan!
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That was my third cousin!
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I told you that in strict
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Confidence.
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>> keenan: that's nasty!
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>> calvin: tell you what,
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C.J. -- here's my little black
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Book.
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Now, there are some 10s in here
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That'll make your mouth water.
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She's a contortionist.
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>> c.J.: oh, wait a minute --
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You got pictures?
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>> calvin: yes, sir.
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And she's a dancer.
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>> c.J.: oh, that's nice.
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>> calvin: and, she's a --
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>> angel: you have a black book?
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I mean, how old are you?
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>> calvin: old enough, baby.
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>> angel: [ yelling in spanish ]
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>> curtis: angel! English!
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English! English!
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>> c.J.: wow, it's like y'all
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Are married already.
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>> angel: chief, I'm gonna go
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Upstairs, okay?
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[ speaks spanish ]
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>> curtis: get that girl all
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Riled up like that.
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Y'all do it all the time.
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What you got, a black book?
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I ain't seen one of these since
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Ella burnt mine up.
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Matter of fact, is this mine?
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>> calvin: no. It's mine.
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>> c.J.: hey, unc, calvin's
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Gonna hook me up with a date.
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>> curtis: oh, come on, man.
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You don't want calvin's
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Leftovers.
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You need to let your uncle hook
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You up.
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>> calvin: please, pops.
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You don't have any game.
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>> keenan: I know.
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His game is so old, he can't
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Even find the field.
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[ laughter ]
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>> curtis: ha. Ha ha.
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>> bart: he doesn't even have
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Tickets to his game!
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>> curtis: bart, do you even
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Know what we're talking about?
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>> bart: no.
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>> curtis: right. So shut up.
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Hey, I got enough game to know
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That dating a linebacker like
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Huretha is a personal foul.
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And a clip.
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Out of bounds.
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[ laughs ]
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>> c.J.: that's cold, unc.
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>> curtis: so is your bed at
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Night.
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>> all: oooh.
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Shank.
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>> curtis: [ shivers, laughs ]
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No, man, I'm telling you --
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Bill's niece just moved to town.
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And she is fine, jack.
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She is fine!
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Let me hook you up, man.
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She got lips like angelina...
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She got a face like halle...
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And legs like tina.
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>> c.J.: unc, hook that up, hook
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That up.
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>> curtis: she fine.
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I'm gonna call bill now.
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>> c.J.: okay.
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>> claretha: shouldn't
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Sister mason be here folding
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These brochures instead of us?
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>> ella: girl, she's in the
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Hospital.
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>> claretha: so?
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She's still got one good hand.
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>> ella: claretha, please.
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Look at this. Look at this.
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Can you believe aids is the
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Second-leading cause of death
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For american women from ages 25
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To 44?
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>> claretha: well, thank god I'm
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45.
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>> ella: ha!
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Okay, why is it that I continue
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To grow older and you continue
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To get younger?
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>> claretha: ain't god good?
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>> ella: whatever. [ laughs ]
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Hello.
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Hey, how can I help you?
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>> karen: yeah, my name is
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Karen bentley, and I was reading
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In the church bulletin that the
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Women's ministry is holding an
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Aids workshop tomorrow.
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>> ella: yes, we are.
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>> karen: well, I would really
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Love to volunteer.
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>> ella: and, karen, we would
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Really love to have you.
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>> karen: great!
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>> ella: oh, I'm ella payne,
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And I am the secretary for the
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Women's ministry, and I run the
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Help center.
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>> karen: nice to meet you.
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>> ella: please.
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>> claretha: I'm claretha
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Jenkins, former first lady
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And twice removed as head
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Of the women's ministry.
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>> karen: nice to meet you.
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>> ella: karen, these are our
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Brochures.
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>> karen: okay. Great.
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Okay, now, I've seen these
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Before.
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Are these what you're gonna pass
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Out tomorrow?
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>> claretha: yes.
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Is there a problem?
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>> karen: well, it's just that
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It only lists statistics.
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It doesn't say anything about
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Symptoms or the importance of
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Getting tested.
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>> ella: oh, I guess you're
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Right.
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>> karen: you know, I could
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Bring in some of my own
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Materials and pass them out
279
00:06:51,206 --> 00:06:52,275
Tomorrow.
280
00:06:52,275 --> 00:06:53,344
>> claretha: why do you have
281
00:06:53,344 --> 00:06:54,724
Materials on aids?
282
00:06:54,724 --> 00:06:55,896
>> karen: because I'm a nurse...
283
00:06:55,896 --> 00:06:57,551
>> ella: oh, okay, okay.
284
00:06:57,551 --> 00:06:58,793
>> karen: ...And I'm hiv
285
00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:00,275
Positive.
286
00:07:00,275 --> 00:07:02,379
>> claretha: oh. Good.
287
00:07:02,379 --> 00:07:03,793
Uh-huh.
288
00:07:03,793 --> 00:07:05,896
Uh, you know, you don't even
289
00:07:05,896 --> 00:07:07,241
Look sick.
290
00:07:07,241 --> 00:07:08,689
>> karen: most infected people
291
00:07:08,689 --> 00:07:10,000
Don't.
292
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,068
>> ella: and that is what we
293
00:07:11,068 --> 00:07:12,034
Need to know.
294
00:07:12,034 --> 00:07:13,206
So...
295
00:07:13,206 --> 00:07:15,034
Karen, can you speak to our
296
00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:16,034
Ladies tomorrow?
297
00:07:16,034 --> 00:07:17,034
>> karen: absolutely.
298
00:07:17,034 --> 00:07:18,137
I would love to, ella.
299
00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:19,551
>> ella: that's good.
300
00:07:19,551 --> 00:07:20,689
Thank you.
301
00:07:20,689 --> 00:07:21,620
Tomorrow.
302
00:07:21,620 --> 00:07:22,517
>> karen: yes, thank you.
303
00:07:22,517 --> 00:07:23,517
Thank you so much.
304
00:07:23,517 --> 00:07:24,482
It was nice meeting you, too,
305
00:07:24,482 --> 00:07:25,482
Claretha.
306
00:07:25,482 --> 00:07:26,551
>> claretha: oh, yeah, baby.
307
00:07:26,551 --> 00:07:27,586
It was nice meeting you, too.
308
00:07:27,586 --> 00:07:29,344
I'll see you tomorrow.
309
00:07:29,344 --> 00:07:30,413
>> karen: okay.
310
00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:31,344
>> ella: tomorrow, karen.
311
00:07:31,344 --> 00:07:32,241
Thank you.
312
00:07:32,241 --> 00:07:34,827
God bless you.
313
00:07:34,827 --> 00:07:36,827
Claretha, why didn't you shake
314
00:07:36,827 --> 00:07:38,000
Her hand the second time?
315
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,000
>> claretha: what?
316
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:40,275
I don't know her like that.
317
00:07:40,275 --> 00:07:42,172
Plus, I like giving air dap.
318
00:07:42,172 --> 00:07:43,310
I'm cool like that.
319
00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:44,482
>> ella: no, you scared like
320
00:07:44,482 --> 00:07:45,724
That.
321
00:07:45,724 --> 00:07:47,344
That.
That's not nice.
322
00:07:47,344 --> 00:07:49,413
That's not nice.
323
00:07:49,413 --> 00:07:50,344
>> curtis: what you talking
324
00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:51,275
About, not your type.
325
00:07:51,275 --> 00:07:52,068
Fine as that woman is.
326
00:07:52,068 --> 00:07:52,931
How can a fine woman like that
327
00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:53,689
Not be your type?
328
00:07:53,689 --> 00:07:54,482
>> ella: call her "Fine" one
329
00:07:54,482 --> 00:07:55,965
More time, hear?
330
00:07:55,965 --> 00:07:58,379
>> c.J.: well, she, uh...
331
00:07:58,379 --> 00:08:00,413
She doesn't want a man.
332
00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:01,413
>> curtis: what you talking
333
00:08:01,413 --> 00:08:02,620
About? All women need a man.
334
00:08:02,620 --> 00:08:04,000
All women need a man.
335
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:04,931
I know these women are
336
00:08:04,931 --> 00:08:06,000
Independent today, but all of
337
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:06,862
Them need a man.
338
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,413
You know, cut the grass, fix a
339
00:08:08,413 --> 00:08:10,103
Flat...Wax that --
340
00:08:10,103 --> 00:08:12,034
>> ella: curtis!
341
00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:13,000
>> c.J.: I didn't say she
342
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,655
Doesn't need a man.
343
00:08:14,655 --> 00:08:17,551
I said she doesn't want a man.
344
00:08:17,551 --> 00:08:19,103
She's a lesbian.
345
00:08:19,103 --> 00:08:20,827
>> curtis: so?
346
00:08:20,827 --> 00:08:23,241
Your auntie's one, too.
347
00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:24,344
Baby?
348
00:08:24,344 --> 00:08:25,310
Ain't nothing wrong with a woman
349
00:08:25,310 --> 00:08:26,551
Having a hobby.
350
00:08:26,551 --> 00:08:27,758
'cause you do them plays.
351
00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:28,758
You do them plays, don't you?
352
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:31,310
Ain't you got your lesbian card?
353
00:08:31,310 --> 00:08:32,206
What was that one?
354
00:08:32,206 --> 00:08:33,551
"God, don't beat up my husband"?
355
00:08:33,551 --> 00:08:34,862
What was that one you did?
356
00:08:34,862 --> 00:08:36,413
>> ella: curtis, he said
357
00:08:36,413 --> 00:08:37,413
"Lesbian."
358
00:08:37,413 --> 00:08:38,586
She likes women.
359
00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:40,000
I'm a thespian.
360
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,344
I like plays.
361
00:08:41,344 --> 00:08:42,758
Get it?
362
00:08:42,758 --> 00:08:43,413
>> curtis: "Luh"?
363
00:08:43,413 --> 00:08:44,931
>> ella: "Luh."
364
00:08:44,931 --> 00:08:45,965
>> curtis: "Thuh."
365
00:08:45,965 --> 00:08:47,172
Whoo!
366
00:08:47,172 --> 00:08:48,310
I'm sorry, man.
367
00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:49,172
I didn't see that one coming.
368
00:08:49,172 --> 00:08:50,068
>> c.J.: it's okay.
369
00:08:50,068 --> 00:08:51,241
I'm cool with it.
370
00:08:51,241 --> 00:08:52,275
I might even hang out with her
371
00:08:52,275 --> 00:08:53,206
Again, you know?
372
00:08:53,206 --> 00:08:55,068
All right, good night, y'all.
373
00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:56,655
[ sighs ]
374
00:08:56,655 --> 00:08:58,586
>> curtis: I don't get it.
375
00:08:58,586 --> 00:09:01,034
How can a woman that fine be a
376
00:09:01,034 --> 00:09:01,758
Les--
377
00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:02,862
>> ella: curtis!
378
00:09:02,862 --> 00:09:03,965
You think I'm playing with you,
379
00:09:03,965 --> 00:09:04,689
Don't you?
380
00:09:04,689 --> 00:09:05,655
>> curtis: what? I didn't say --
381
00:09:05,655 --> 00:09:06,724
>> ella: call her "Fine" one
382
00:09:06,724 --> 00:09:07,689
More time.
383
00:09:07,689 --> 00:09:11,000
Don't do it.
384
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,586
>> curtis: fine.
385
00:09:14,586 --> 00:09:15,551
Look here.
386
00:09:15,551 --> 00:09:17,172
Since c.J. Is lonely and
387
00:09:17,172 --> 00:09:18,310
Borderline pathetic...
388
00:09:18,310 --> 00:09:19,482
>> c.J.: thanks, unc.
389
00:09:19,482 --> 00:09:20,793
>> curtis: I love you.
390
00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:22,000
...Here's what we're gonna do.
391
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,241
Anybody that can get c.J. A
392
00:09:23,241 --> 00:09:24,896
Perfect date is gonna get the
393
00:09:24,896 --> 00:09:25,551
Day off.
394
00:09:25,551 --> 00:09:27,034
>> angel: the perfect date?
395
00:09:27,034 --> 00:09:28,000
Sorry.
396
00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,344
I'm not available.
397
00:09:29,344 --> 00:09:30,413
>> bart: neither am I.
398
00:09:30,413 --> 00:09:31,586
>> curtis: shut up, bart.
399
00:09:31,586 --> 00:09:32,689
Okay, she don't have to be
400
00:09:32,689 --> 00:09:33,482
Perfect.
401
00:09:33,482 --> 00:09:34,517
She don't have to be perfect --
402
00:09:34,517 --> 00:09:35,413
Just breathing.
403
00:09:35,413 --> 00:09:36,931
You can't be too choicy, your
404
00:09:36,931 --> 00:09:37,655
Situation.
405
00:09:37,655 --> 00:09:38,344
>> c.J.: thanks again.
406
00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:39,034
>> curtis: I love you.
407
00:09:39,034 --> 00:09:39,862
That's why I do it.
408
00:09:39,862 --> 00:09:40,793
>> calvin: breathing is the
409
00:09:40,793 --> 00:09:41,689
Only requirement?
410
00:09:41,689 --> 00:09:42,689
Well, shoot, let's go down to
411
00:09:42,689 --> 00:09:43,620
The corner of ponce and
412
00:09:43,620 --> 00:09:44,758
Boulevard.
413
00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:46,310
Y'all got cash, right?
414
00:09:46,310 --> 00:09:47,000
>> curtis: ha!
415
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,620
"You got cash to go to ponce"!
416
00:09:48,620 --> 00:09:50,931
Sit down and shut up.
417
00:09:50,931 --> 00:09:52,413
Okay, you know what?
418
00:09:52,413 --> 00:09:53,379
I'm gonna change the stakes a
419
00:09:53,379 --> 00:09:54,034
Little bit.
420
00:09:54,034 --> 00:09:56,344
Day off with pay.
421
00:09:56,344 --> 00:09:57,862
>> keenan: oh!
422
00:09:57,862 --> 00:09:58,758
Now we're talking.
423
00:09:58,758 --> 00:10:01,172
>> curtis: yeah, you heard that.
424
00:10:01,172 --> 00:10:02,413
>> c.J.: y'all got women lined
425
00:10:02,413 --> 00:10:03,862
Up all the way around the block,
426
00:10:03,862 --> 00:10:05,448
Man. What y'all do?
427
00:10:05,448 --> 00:10:07,551
Man. What y'all do?
Ha ha!
428
00:10:07,551 --> 00:10:11,620
Ha ha!
429
00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:13,344
>> c.J.: how can I possibly
430
00:10:13,344 --> 00:10:14,793
Choose one from all them women?
431
00:10:14,793 --> 00:10:15,724
>> calvin: hold up.
432
00:10:15,724 --> 00:10:16,586
Who said you had to pick just
433
00:10:16,586 --> 00:10:17,379
One?
434
00:10:17,379 --> 00:10:18,206
>> c.J.: I could get three or
435
00:10:18,206 --> 00:10:19,137
Four.
436
00:10:19,137 --> 00:10:20,034
>> angel: c.J.!
437
00:10:20,034 --> 00:10:21,068
Because one is enough.
438
00:10:21,068 --> 00:10:21,931
[ speaks spanish ]
439
00:10:21,931 --> 00:10:25,758
>> calvin: you know you want me.
440
00:10:25,758 --> 00:10:26,724
No, it's okay.
441
00:10:26,724 --> 00:10:27,793
She just likes it rough, that's
442
00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:28,620
All.
443
00:10:28,620 --> 00:10:30,965
>> keenan: hey, why don't we set
444
00:10:30,965 --> 00:10:32,344
Up speed dates so c.J. Can
445
00:10:32,344 --> 00:10:33,000
Decide?
446
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,103
>> c.J.: okay! That'll work.
447
00:10:34,103 --> 00:10:35,896
>> curtis: good idea, good idea.
448
00:10:35,896 --> 00:10:37,931
>> c.J.: hey, bart, this is what
449
00:10:37,931 --> 00:10:38,827
I want you to do.
450
00:10:38,827 --> 00:10:40,000
I want you to go out there, and
451
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,275
I want you to screen the girls,
452
00:10:41,275 --> 00:10:42,137
All right?
453
00:10:42,137 --> 00:10:43,000
So when you see the ones that
454
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:44,413
You like, bring me the other
455
00:10:44,413 --> 00:10:45,241
Ones.
456
00:10:45,241 --> 00:10:46,206
>> bart: cool!
457
00:10:46,206 --> 00:10:47,413
That leaves more for me.
458
00:10:47,413 --> 00:10:48,655
>> c.J.: and, unc, why don't you
459
00:10:48,655 --> 00:10:50,448
Time everything and blow the
460
00:10:50,448 --> 00:10:51,413
Whistle and say "Next."
461
00:10:51,413 --> 00:10:52,517
Keep it moving on.
462
00:10:52,517 --> 00:10:53,827
Got the whistle?
463
00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:55,068
>> curtis: right here.
464
00:10:55,068 --> 00:10:56,275
>> c.J.: okay.
465
00:10:56,275 --> 00:10:57,275
>> keenan: introducing
466
00:10:57,275 --> 00:10:58,896
Flexible felicia!
467
00:10:58,896 --> 00:11:02,896
>> curtis: ooh hoo!
468
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:05,655
>> c.J.: look at that.
469
00:11:05,655 --> 00:11:06,931
You must be calvin's friend,
470
00:11:06,931 --> 00:11:08,172
The contortionist.
471
00:11:08,172 --> 00:11:09,827
Hi, I'm c.J.
472
00:11:09,827 --> 00:11:11,448
How you know I like toes?
473
00:11:11,448 --> 00:11:12,379
Ha ha!
474
00:11:12,379 --> 00:11:13,482
Listen, tell me about yourself.
475
00:11:13,482 --> 00:11:16,034
[ whistle blowing ]
476
00:11:16,034 --> 00:11:16,896
>> curtis: next!
477
00:11:16,896 --> 00:11:18,586
>> c.J.: but she flexible.
478
00:11:18,586 --> 00:11:19,551
>> curtis: you don't even know
479
00:11:19,551 --> 00:11:20,758
What to do with that.
480
00:11:20,758 --> 00:11:21,620
>> c.J.: she flexible.
481
00:11:21,620 --> 00:11:22,689
>> curtis: she'll hurt you.
482
00:11:22,689 --> 00:11:23,586
Go ahead on, baby.
483
00:11:23,586 --> 00:11:24,413
That's nice, though.
484
00:11:24,413 --> 00:11:25,275
That's real nice. That's a gift.
485
00:11:25,275 --> 00:11:26,172
>> calvin: sorry, baby.
486
00:11:26,172 --> 00:11:27,310
But stay limber, okay?
487
00:11:27,310 --> 00:11:28,275
Call me.
488
00:11:28,275 --> 00:11:29,655
>> c.J.: that's was all right.
489
00:11:29,655 --> 00:11:31,000
She put the leg -- she put the
490
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,034
Leg back there.
491
00:11:32,034 --> 00:11:33,000
>> keenan: introducing
492
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,517
Christina locklear!
493
00:11:34,517 --> 00:11:35,448
>> c.J.: yeah,
494
00:11:35,448 --> 00:11:36,275
Christina locklear.
495
00:11:36,275 --> 00:11:38,172
Oh! What the hell?
496
00:11:38,172 --> 00:11:40,517
Uh, miss...Ter.
497
00:11:40,517 --> 00:11:42,551
There's some confusion, 'cause
498
00:11:42,551 --> 00:11:44,241
I only date women.
499
00:11:44,241 --> 00:11:45,620
Bart, I thought you were
500
00:11:45,620 --> 00:11:46,620
Screening 'em!
501
00:11:46,620 --> 00:11:47,862
>> bart: well, he said he was
502
00:11:47,862 --> 00:11:49,103
Having an operation soon.
503
00:11:49,103 --> 00:11:50,103
I wanted to give you a
504
00:11:50,103 --> 00:11:52,724
Selection.
505
00:11:52,724 --> 00:11:54,413
>> c.J.: blow the whistle.
506
00:11:54,413 --> 00:11:56,896
Unc, blow the whistle.
507
00:11:56,896 --> 00:11:58,517
Blow the whistle!
508
00:11:58,517 --> 00:11:59,413
>> curtis: c.J., why don't you
509
00:11:59,413 --> 00:12:00,413
Get to know him?
510
00:12:00,413 --> 00:12:01,517
He might be a nice lady.
511
00:12:01,517 --> 00:12:02,793
>> c.J.: will you...
512
00:12:02,793 --> 00:12:05,172
>> curtis: [ laughs ]
513
00:12:05,172 --> 00:12:06,931
You know you can't be picky.
514
00:12:06,931 --> 00:12:09,551
[ whistle blows ]
515
00:12:09,551 --> 00:12:11,724
Sorry, rupaul.
516
00:12:11,724 --> 00:12:13,413
[ laughs ]
517
00:12:13,413 --> 00:12:15,103
>> c.J.: he big, he big.
518
00:12:15,103 --> 00:12:16,413
>> curtis: ooh-whee.
519
00:12:16,413 --> 00:12:17,896
He almost big as huretha.
520
00:12:17,896 --> 00:12:19,068
>> keenan: introducing
521
00:12:19,068 --> 00:12:20,931
Miss chang.
522
00:12:20,931 --> 00:12:23,206
[ whistle blows ]
523
00:12:23,206 --> 00:12:24,896
>> c.J.: yeah. Hey.
524
00:12:24,896 --> 00:12:26,689
Hi, I'm c.J.
525
00:12:26,689 --> 00:12:27,793
>> suequita: what up, son?
526
00:12:27,793 --> 00:12:28,586
I'm suequita.
527
00:12:28,586 --> 00:12:29,724
You the fireman with benefits
528
00:12:29,724 --> 00:12:30,655
Looking for a wifey?
529
00:12:30,655 --> 00:12:31,758
>> c.J.: uh, well...
530
00:12:31,758 --> 00:12:32,724
>> suequita: what y'all be doing
531
00:12:32,724 --> 00:12:33,655
Up in here when there ain't no
532
00:12:33,655 --> 00:12:34,586
Fire?
533
00:12:34,586 --> 00:12:35,448
>> c.J.: during the time that
534
00:12:35,448 --> 00:12:37,448
We're not working, we like to
535
00:12:37,448 --> 00:12:39,482
Watch television.
536
00:12:39,482 --> 00:12:41,344
And we play cards.
537
00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:42,034
>> suequita: you watch
538
00:12:42,034 --> 00:12:42,862
Television, play cards?
539
00:12:42,862 --> 00:12:43,793
>> c.J.: we play chess.
540
00:12:43,793 --> 00:12:44,758
Unc plays chess.
541
00:12:44,758 --> 00:12:45,620
>> suequita: y'all a bunch of
542
00:12:45,620 --> 00:12:46,517
Squares.
543
00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:47,275
Straight up l-7s, yo.
544
00:12:47,275 --> 00:12:48,172
No wonder you don't got no
545
00:12:48,172 --> 00:12:49,068
Wives.
546
00:12:49,068 --> 00:12:49,931
I don't want to be your wife,
547
00:12:49,931 --> 00:12:50,724
Either.
548
00:12:50,724 --> 00:12:51,724
You don't got no music up in
549
00:12:51,724 --> 00:12:52,586
Here?
550
00:12:52,586 --> 00:12:53,448
>> c.J.: listen, kimora.
551
00:12:53,448 --> 00:12:54,103
Um...
552
00:12:54,103 --> 00:12:54,862
We, uh...
553
00:12:54,862 --> 00:12:55,724
We were looking for somebody
554
00:12:55,724 --> 00:12:56,551
Who speaks english.
555
00:12:56,551 --> 00:12:57,310
>> suequita: oh, you want
556
00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:58,482
Someone who speaks english?
557
00:12:58,482 --> 00:12:59,758
Is that an asian dis, son?
558
00:12:59,758 --> 00:13:01,000
I amspeaking english!
559
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:02,034
Shoot, tell me I ain't speaking
560
00:13:02,034 --> 00:13:02,931
English.
561
00:13:02,931 --> 00:13:03,827
[ whistle blowing ]
562
00:13:03,827 --> 00:13:04,724
>> c.J.: back up off me.
563
00:13:04,724 --> 00:13:05,586
>> curtis: jacqueline chan, hold
564
00:13:05,586 --> 00:13:06,551
On.
565
00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:07,344
>> suequita: what are you
566
00:13:07,344 --> 00:13:08,137
Blowing your whistle for?
567
00:13:08,137 --> 00:13:09,000
>> curtis: because we need you
568
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,137
Be gone now, son.
569
00:13:11,137 --> 00:13:12,689
Bye.
570
00:13:12,689 --> 00:13:13,896
>> suequita: get your hands off
571
00:13:13,896 --> 00:13:14,551
Me!
572
00:13:14,551 --> 00:13:15,724
I don't need you to touch me.
573
00:13:15,724 --> 00:13:16,965
Shoot!
574
00:13:16,965 --> 00:13:17,793
>> keenan: introducing
575
00:13:17,793 --> 00:13:21,000
Mary "Mother of agnes" scott.
576
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,413
>> curtis: your knees gonna get
577
00:13:22,413 --> 00:13:24,068
Dirty.
578
00:13:24,068 --> 00:13:25,206
Hey, hey!
579
00:13:25,206 --> 00:13:26,689
What the hell?
580
00:13:26,689 --> 00:13:29,758
[ bellows ]
581
00:13:29,758 --> 00:13:31,379
>> c.J.: will you get her out of
582
00:13:31,379 --> 00:13:32,275
Here?
583
00:13:32,275 --> 00:13:33,103
>> curtis: here, bless you.
584
00:13:33,103 --> 00:13:33,965
Bless you.
585
00:13:33,965 --> 00:13:35,000
Now, go on.
586
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,206
Go on!
587
00:13:36,206 --> 00:13:37,896
Will you go?
588
00:13:37,896 --> 00:13:40,586
Go!
589
00:13:40,586 --> 00:13:42,103
Go on and be with god.
590
00:13:42,103 --> 00:13:43,379
>> calvin: it was holy water.
591
00:13:43,379 --> 00:13:44,551
>> curtis: it's holy.
592
00:13:44,551 --> 00:13:45,482
>> karen: do you know why
593
00:13:45,482 --> 00:13:46,482
African-american women are
594
00:13:46,482 --> 00:13:48,103
16% more likely to contract
595
00:13:48,103 --> 00:13:49,206
Aids?
596
00:13:49,206 --> 00:13:50,241
>> claretha: I do.
597
00:13:50,241 --> 00:13:51,551
It's because of those down-low
598
00:13:51,551 --> 00:13:52,379
Brothers.
599
00:13:52,379 --> 00:13:53,448
I heard about them on "Oprah."
600
00:13:53,448 --> 00:13:54,862
>> karen: actually, the reason
601
00:13:54,862 --> 00:13:56,172
Is because of denial and
602
00:13:56,172 --> 00:13:57,896
Ignorance.
603
00:13:57,896 --> 00:13:59,379
Look, basically,
604
00:13:59,379 --> 00:14:00,896
African-american women are in
605
00:14:00,896 --> 00:14:02,034
Denial, okay?
606
00:14:02,034 --> 00:14:03,000
They don't think they can get
607
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,172
Aids, so they don't use
608
00:14:04,172 --> 00:14:05,103
Protection.
609
00:14:05,103 --> 00:14:06,000
And we're ignorant because we
610
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,620
Fail to get tested.
611
00:14:07,620 --> 00:14:08,827
Raise your hand if you've ever
612
00:14:08,827 --> 00:14:10,931
Been tested for aids.
613
00:14:10,931 --> 00:14:12,827
>> ella: put your hand down.
614
00:14:12,827 --> 00:14:15,000
That was for cholesterol.
615
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:16,482
>> claretha: they took blood.
616
00:14:16,482 --> 00:14:17,310
>> karen: see, this is what
617
00:14:17,310 --> 00:14:18,068
I'm talking about.
618
00:14:18,068 --> 00:14:18,896
Only two of you raised your
619
00:14:18,896 --> 00:14:19,793
Hands.
620
00:14:19,793 --> 00:14:20,931
Do you realize that it takes
621
00:14:20,931 --> 00:14:22,310
8 to 10 years for some
622
00:14:22,310 --> 00:14:23,482
People to show the symptoms of
623
00:14:23,482 --> 00:14:24,724
Hiv?
624
00:14:24,724 --> 00:14:25,655
So you could be spreading the
625
00:14:25,655 --> 00:14:27,689
Disease without even knowing it.
626
00:14:27,689 --> 00:14:29,000
Look, the only way for you to
627
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,724
Know for sure is for you and
628
00:14:30,724 --> 00:14:32,482
Your partner to get tested.
629
00:14:32,482 --> 00:14:34,103
Okay, we're gonna take a
630
00:14:34,103 --> 00:14:35,413
20-minute break.
631
00:14:35,413 --> 00:14:36,482
And when we return, I will
632
00:14:36,482 --> 00:14:38,000
Discuss the symptoms of hiv.
633
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,000
>> ella: yes.
634
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:41,068
Ladies, please help yourselves
635
00:14:41,068 --> 00:14:43,827
To cookies and punch.
636
00:14:43,827 --> 00:14:45,000
Whoo!
637
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,517
This is good, isn't it?
638
00:14:46,517 --> 00:14:50,517
Claretha.
639
00:14:50,517 --> 00:14:53,448
Karen is doing an excellent job.
640
00:14:53,448 --> 00:14:54,758
>> claretha: yeah, she is.
641
00:14:54,758 --> 00:14:56,137
She really is.
642
00:14:56,137 --> 00:14:58,413
Ooh, girl, I better go over here
643
00:14:58,413 --> 00:15:00,275
Get me an oatmeal cookie before
644
00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:01,413
These greedy women wolf them
645
00:15:01,413 --> 00:15:02,413
All down.
646
00:15:02,413 --> 00:15:03,379
>> karen: here you go.
647
00:15:03,379 --> 00:15:04,137
You can have some of mine.
648
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:05,000
I don't need all these.
649
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:05,793
>> claretha: oh, that's all
650
00:15:05,793 --> 00:15:06,620
Right.
651
00:15:06,620 --> 00:15:08,448
I really prefer chocolate chip.
652
00:15:08,448 --> 00:15:10,000
>> karen: okay. Suit yourself.
653
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:13,310
>> claretha: okay.
654
00:15:13,310 --> 00:15:14,793
>> ella: claretha, why didn't
655
00:15:14,793 --> 00:15:16,206
You take that cookie?
656
00:15:16,206 --> 00:15:17,206
>> claretha: I just said I
657
00:15:17,206 --> 00:15:18,862
Prefer chocolate chip.
658
00:15:18,862 --> 00:15:20,310
Plus, you know, I need to
659
00:15:20,310 --> 00:15:21,206
Watch my figure.
660
00:15:21,206 --> 00:15:23,551
>> ella: oh, no, no, no.
661
00:15:23,551 --> 00:15:24,965
You're not fooling nobody.
662
00:15:24,965 --> 00:15:26,241
You're treating karen like she
663
00:15:26,241 --> 00:15:27,206
Has --
664
00:15:27,206 --> 00:15:28,241
>> claretha: what? Aids?
665
00:15:28,241 --> 00:15:30,344
>> ella: she does not have aids.
666
00:15:30,344 --> 00:15:32,413
She's hiv positive.
667
00:15:32,413 --> 00:15:33,689
>> claretha: same thing.
668
00:15:33,689 --> 00:15:34,793
>> ella: no, it isn't.
669
00:15:34,793 --> 00:15:37,000
You can spread a cold faster
670
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,310
Than hiv.
671
00:15:38,310 --> 00:15:39,379
>> claretha: really?
672
00:15:39,379 --> 00:15:40,482
>> ella: claretha, look at this.
673
00:15:40,482 --> 00:15:41,689
Did you see it?
674
00:15:41,689 --> 00:15:43,000
You cannot get the virus from
675
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,793
Saliva, tears, sweat, shaking
676
00:15:44,793 --> 00:15:46,655
Hands, kissing.
677
00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:48,172
>> claretha: oh.
678
00:15:48,172 --> 00:15:49,793
I guess I am a little ignorant,
679
00:15:49,793 --> 00:15:50,620
Huh?
680
00:15:50,620 --> 00:15:51,655
>> ella: yes! I mean, well --
681
00:15:51,655 --> 00:15:53,448
You know what? No.
682
00:15:53,448 --> 00:15:55,482
Ignorant is not knowing.
683
00:15:55,482 --> 00:15:58,827
You just plain "Ig'nant."
684
00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:00,551
>> claretha: I'm sorry.
685
00:16:00,551 --> 00:16:03,206
>> ella: you should be.
686
00:16:03,206 --> 00:16:04,344
>> keenan: introducing
687
00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:06,517
Miss major ette!
688
00:16:06,517 --> 00:16:07,896
>> c.J.: hey, she fine.
689
00:16:07,896 --> 00:16:09,137
She fine.
690
00:16:09,137 --> 00:16:10,482
>> bart: ♪ oh, when the saints ♪
691
00:16:10,482 --> 00:16:12,275
♪ go marching in ♪
692
00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:13,413
♪ oh, when the saints
693
00:16:13,413 --> 00:16:15,931
Go marching in ♪
694
00:16:15,931 --> 00:16:18,241
♪ how I long to be in that
695
00:16:18,241 --> 00:16:19,379
Number ♪
696
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,241
>> c.J.: unc, blow the whistle.
697
00:16:20,241 --> 00:16:21,137
>> bart: ♪ when the saints go
698
00:16:21,137 --> 00:16:22,310
Marching in ♪
699
00:16:22,310 --> 00:16:23,586
>> c.J.: uncle curtis!
700
00:16:23,586 --> 00:16:25,034
>> curtis: I like this song.
701
00:16:25,034 --> 00:16:27,482
>> c.J.: blow the whistle.
702
00:16:27,482 --> 00:16:34,448
[ whistle blowing ]
703
00:16:34,448 --> 00:16:35,724
>> curtis: march it out!
704
00:16:35,724 --> 00:16:37,275
>> c.J.: man! You know what?
705
00:16:37,275 --> 00:16:38,689
I can't even do this no more,
706
00:16:38,689 --> 00:16:39,517
Man.
707
00:16:39,517 --> 00:16:40,724
I can't see no more women.
708
00:16:40,724 --> 00:16:42,310
I don't care who is back there.
709
00:16:42,310 --> 00:16:43,482
I don't want to see no more
710
00:16:43,482 --> 00:16:44,413
Women.
711
00:16:44,413 --> 00:16:45,206
>> angel: really?
712
00:16:45,206 --> 00:16:46,241
Well, I guess I'll just have to
713
00:16:46,241 --> 00:16:47,310
Send my friend amber back.
714
00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:48,275
>> c.J.: I guess we could see
715
00:16:48,275 --> 00:16:50,379
One more.
716
00:16:50,379 --> 00:16:52,000
One more ain't gonna hurt.
717
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,034
Yeah, amber.
718
00:16:53,034 --> 00:16:54,482
Hey. How you doing?
719
00:16:54,482 --> 00:16:55,379
>> amber: great.
720
00:16:55,379 --> 00:16:56,517
>> c.J.: all right.
721
00:16:56,517 --> 00:16:57,482
>> amber: thanks for agreeing to
722
00:16:57,482 --> 00:16:58,379
Meet me.
723
00:16:58,379 --> 00:16:59,551
I'm a little nervous because
724
00:16:59,551 --> 00:17:00,758
This is my first date since my
725
00:17:00,758 --> 00:17:01,689
Breakup.
726
00:17:01,689 --> 00:17:02,896
>> c.J.: me too. Uh-huh
727
00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:05,310
So, tell me about yourself.
728
00:17:05,310 --> 00:17:06,758
>> amber: well, I'm a dentist,
729
00:17:06,758 --> 00:17:08,896
And in my spare time I volunteer
730
00:17:08,896 --> 00:17:10,206
At the boys & girls club.
731
00:17:10,206 --> 00:17:11,000
>> c.J.: you like kids?
732
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,275
>> amber: yeah, I love kids.
733
00:17:12,275 --> 00:17:13,862
>> c.J.: ha ha!
734
00:17:13,862 --> 00:17:14,931
>> curtis: she like kids.
735
00:17:14,931 --> 00:17:16,103
>> c.J.: you like kids.
736
00:17:16,103 --> 00:17:16,862
Yeah.
737
00:17:16,862 --> 00:17:18,379
>> amber: I also love camping,
738
00:17:18,379 --> 00:17:20,034
Cooking, going to the movies,
739
00:17:20,034 --> 00:17:21,034
Ice-skating.
740
00:17:21,034 --> 00:17:22,000
>> c.J.: what?
741
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,000
You like all that?
742
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,000
>> amber: uh, what are you
743
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,862
Doing?
744
00:17:26,862 --> 00:17:27,724
>> c.J.: you're too good to be
745
00:17:27,724 --> 00:17:28,724
True, girl.
746
00:17:28,724 --> 00:17:29,724
I know ashton kutcher 'bout to
747
00:17:29,724 --> 00:17:30,793
Jump out and be like, "You're
748
00:17:30,793 --> 00:17:32,000
Punk'd!"
749
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,000
[ laughter ]
750
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:34,413
I know he gonna get me.
751
00:17:34,413 --> 00:17:36,586
[ laughs ] Well...
752
00:17:36,586 --> 00:17:37,827
>> amber: I like a man with a
753
00:17:37,827 --> 00:17:38,655
Good sense of humor.
754
00:17:38,655 --> 00:17:39,793
>> c.J.: that's right.
755
00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:41,000
Let's talk some more over
756
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:41,758
Dinner.
757
00:17:41,758 --> 00:17:42,724
>> amber: okay. Sushi?
758
00:17:42,724 --> 00:17:43,896
>> c.J.: you like sushi?
759
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,551
Man, it's... [ laughs ]
760
00:17:45,551 --> 00:17:46,586
Wow.
761
00:17:46,586 --> 00:17:47,896
I really can't stay out too
762
00:17:47,896 --> 00:17:48,655
Late, though.
763
00:17:48,655 --> 00:17:50,172
I got to get home to my kids.
764
00:17:50,172 --> 00:17:51,931
It's been hard raising them by
765
00:17:51,931 --> 00:17:53,379
Myself and everything ever
766
00:17:53,379 --> 00:17:55,068
Since my ex-wife got hooked on
767
00:17:55,068 --> 00:17:57,275
Crack and burned down our house.
768
00:17:57,275 --> 00:17:58,275
[ whistle blowing ]
769
00:17:58,275 --> 00:17:59,586
She left me with a ton of debt.
770
00:17:59,586 --> 00:18:00,517
Man, it's just been hard.
771
00:18:00,517 --> 00:18:01,758
I had to move in with my aunt
772
00:18:01,758 --> 00:18:05,551
And uncle. It's crazy.
773
00:18:05,551 --> 00:18:07,206
Where amber go?
774
00:18:07,206 --> 00:18:08,344
>> curtis: I got one word for
775
00:18:08,344 --> 00:18:11,965
You -- less is more.
776
00:18:11,965 --> 00:18:13,827
>> ella: karen, you did a
777
00:18:13,827 --> 00:18:15,413
Fabulous job!
778
00:18:15,413 --> 00:18:16,862
Thank you for coming.
779
00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:18,137
>> karen: oh, it was my
780
00:18:18,137 --> 00:18:18,931
Pleasure, ella.
781
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:20,206
Thank you.
782
00:18:20,206 --> 00:18:21,517
You really did a great job
783
00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:22,655
Putting this workshop together.
784
00:18:22,655 --> 00:18:24,000
>> ella: thank god.
785
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:24,689
[ both laugh ]
786
00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:26,137
>> claretha: you both did.
787
00:18:26,137 --> 00:18:29,724
Karen, thank you very much.
788
00:18:29,724 --> 00:18:31,689
I want you to know that our
789
00:18:31,689 --> 00:18:34,000
Church is lucky to have you.
790
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,068
>> karen: thank you.
791
00:18:35,068 --> 00:18:36,172
>> claretha: ella, I'll wait for
792
00:18:36,172 --> 00:18:36,931
You in the car.
793
00:18:36,931 --> 00:18:38,724
>> ella: okay, babe.
794
00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:39,862
>> karen: ella, I really have to
795
00:18:39,862 --> 00:18:40,862
Thank you for speaking to
796
00:18:40,862 --> 00:18:42,103
Claretha.
797
00:18:42,103 --> 00:18:44,000
>> ella: what do you mean?
798
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:44,896
>> karen: at first, she wouldn't
799
00:18:44,896 --> 00:18:46,310
Even touch me -- and she just
800
00:18:46,310 --> 00:18:47,758
Shook my hand?
801
00:18:47,758 --> 00:18:48,965
I know it was you.
802
00:18:48,965 --> 00:18:50,793
>> ella: on behalf of my friend,
803
00:18:50,793 --> 00:18:52,068
I am so sorry.
804
00:18:52,068 --> 00:18:53,758
She really didn't mean you any
805
00:18:53,758 --> 00:18:54,758
Harm.
806
00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:55,931
>> karen: it's all right.
807
00:18:55,931 --> 00:18:57,827
I deal with it all the time.
808
00:18:57,827 --> 00:18:59,517
>> ella: well, maybe one day,
809
00:18:59,517 --> 00:19:01,310
It'll just get better.
810
00:19:01,310 --> 00:19:02,344
>> karen: amen to that.
811
00:19:02,344 --> 00:19:03,689
>> ella: amen to that.
812
00:19:03,689 --> 00:19:04,551
Thank you, baby.
813
00:19:04,551 --> 00:19:06,517
>> karen: thank you.
814
00:19:06,517 --> 00:19:07,103
>> ella: god bless you.
51746
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