Original subtitles

Hello?

Open the door. I'm standing outside.

- Outside where? - Outside your room.

We have a crisis, open the door.

I'm not in my room.

Then, where are you?

You slept with Sarfaraz Khan!

How was it?

It was awesome.

As if you can remember.

He looks so delicious, even when he's sleeping.

Stop it! Raima!

What are we going to do about this?

And now, everyone!

For the best part of the Y.P.P. night!

Because the prince of Delhi has a surprise gift...

for the princess of Dubai!

Let's welcome

Bollywood's most dashing celebrity actor...

- Sarfaraz Khan! - Oh, my God!

It's actually him!

Oh, my God! Thank you so much, Jogi!

Oh, my God!

- Do I look okay? - Amazing.

Thank you so much, I love you!

I love you.

In this city of great wealth and high aspiration,

the most compulsive desire is...

to capture that sparkle.

Why do they call it Y.P.P.?

Young People's Party.

It's just an excuse to party without your parents and drink.

- We don't have these things back home. - You don't?

This outfit isn't fitting me well, right?

Yeah, that's what happens when you wear a synthetic fabric.

Try wearing a natural fabric next time.

Keep your natural ideas to yourself.

Tell me if you have ideas for western outfits.

- Okay? - Hmm.

And shoot the couple, not me!

- Alright! Girls and boys! - Thank you, bro.

- Now is the time for all of you... - Don't be silly!

to hit the dance floor!

Show me what you've got!

- Hey. - Hey.

Where were you?

I was at the factory.

At the factory?

Yeah, it opens in three days.

Even we have just three days.

Babe...

not now, please.

Okay?

Come on, babe, I'm exhausted.

If your mother asks me why we're not pregnant...

I'll tell her, "your son is always tired."

Hey!

Busted!

Ciggie?

You are too young to be smoking.

You say this every time.

Last offer.

- By the way... - Hmm?

I am in love with Ella Fitzgerald.

I can't believe I'd never heard her before.

- You have good taste. - Thank you.

- What are you reading? - Death in Venice.

- It's about this older man - Hmm.

who gets so obsessed by the beauty of this young boy...

- Hmm... - that it destroys him.

You would love it.

Uh-huh?

- Okay, bye! - Yeah, bye.

- Go to school! - Yeah!

- Study hard! - Yeah!

- Stop smoking! - Okay!

Good morning!

Good morning, Mr. Gupta.

Late night again?

Yeah, I... I had an event, so...

You didn't take your car?

Uh...no.

Somebody dropped you?

I took a... I took a taxi.

- Oh, listen... - Hmm?

Will you be home today?

I need to get some wiring repaired.

Uh, yeah...

Actually I'll be leaving home in an hour, so...

So shall I get it done during the day?

You won't be disturbed as well.

And I have an extra key, so...

Yeah! Yeah, okay. Sure.

Just put everything back in order when you're done?

- Don't worry. I will. - Okay.

Okay.

- Have a good day. - Yeah, you too.

I still think we should serve a full meal.

Yeah, but it's a 4:00 p.m. function, Adil.

Sundowner, high tea...

- Trust her, Adil. - Papa, we're opening a factory.

Your big Punjabi family will expect their Chola Bhatura.

He has a point.

Listen, they're going to love the wine and cheese vibe.

Stop stressing.

- Office 2... - Ah.

Hello?

- How did the sangeet go? - Very well.

I...

paid Adil the installment also.

- That's not what I meant, but... - Adil has a Midas Touch.

If Made In Heaven fails, then it would be the first failure for him.

- Why would you say something like that? - Okay, bye.

Running a business isn't everybody's cup of tea.

Sorry, sorry.

Jagdish.

So...

where were we? The menu!

Let's go with the wine and cheese thing.

- Okay. - Sounds good?

- Yeah. - Excuse me.

Yeah.

What's up?

What?!

Open the fucking door! You son of a bitch!

Open this door! What, you're scared now?

Come out, you bastard!

Open! This is your Sarfaraz, huh?

Come out!

You bloody...

Bloody...

- Jogi... - Just fuck off, you planner!

What the fuck does he think, huh?

I called you!

Me, Joginder Sethi!

- I called him! - Jogi...

- And I'm fucking paying him! - Yes...

- And he kisses my girl? - Okay, relax...

Give me my money!

What's wrong with him?

What, auntie? You want a picture? Here.

Got it?

Open the door, you hero! I'll break your face!

- Hello! You have to stop this! - It's his hotel.

Fucking asshole! Open this door!

- Where the hell is his manager?! - Fucker!

- What the fuck am I supposed to do? - I don't know

- but you've got to handle it, okay? - Sir.

Can I talk to him about the kiss with the bride?

Swati, please...

Let's please stick to talking about the brand, okay?

That's what we're here for. Please have a seat.

- Please cancel this. - How?

I don't know how but you've got to can...

Sarfi...

No, no... I...she...

The security guards haven't been allowed to go up.

It's totally crazy here.

I've called his father he's on his way, don't worry.

Just...just stay in the room. Keep things locked.

- I'll handle the media, don't worry. - Fuck the media, Ashoo!

He's fucking holding me hostage, just fucking get the cops!

Sarfi, we've got to handle this.

The media is going to have a field day.

You know what?

- Fuck the media, and fuck you! - Okay, okay...

Get me out of here, you fucking dick!

Fuck you!

- Is he coming? - No.

What time is the flight?

The charter is waiting. The media is waiting.

We'll be charging you another two crores for today.

Just cancel this!

How?

Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen

I'm extremely sorry to inform you

that Sarfaraz has had to fly out early this morning.

His doggy Snowy, met with an accident and is with us no more.

Sorry.

That's really sad.

Let me settle in, then I'll send you the entire airport schedule.

Okay?

Okay, bye.

Open! Open!

- Open! Open! - What are you doing, son?

If you don't want to marry her, just tell us!

- Shut up, mummy! - You shut up!

Spoilt, bloody rotten!

- Excuse me? - Open! Open!

Jogi, people need to go through!

Excuse me, can we get through?

Sorry, it's a personal matter, please go to your room.

I'm sorry, my son is not very well.

- I apologize. - Open! Open!

- Your room tonight is complimentary... - Mr. Sethi, if...

Sarfaraz does not leave today, you have to pay another two crores.

Balls, I'll pay!

I cannot do anything, sir. You have signed a contract.

Open! Open!

- This is enough! - Open! Open!

- Grab him and take him out of here! - Open!

- Get him out of here! - Let go of me! Open!

I said let go of me!

- Be gentle with my boy! - Take him away!

You'll be fine, my son!

Mummy, why don't you say something to them?!

Has the sardar left?

We're not going to risk your life, Sarfi.

- Sarfaraz, I'm damn sorry, man! I'm... - Shut up!

Just shut up!

Get my stuff!

That motherfucker banged on my door

- for two hours! - He's the owner of the hotel.

- How can you fucking let this happen! - Where the fuck are you?!

Fucking fuck you!

Just stop, you road runner!

Out of my way!

- Get out! - Jogi!

Leave me! Don't pull my leg!

Leave me!

Motherfucker!

Relax.

No, no!

- You want to play hockey? - No, no...

- You want to play hockey? - Sarfi, no. Sarfi...

- You want to play hockey? - No, no!

I'll fucking play hockey with your balls, bastard!

Please! Please, Sarfaraz!

Don't, please!

This is assault!

I'm fucking assaulting you?

Yes! And I'm going to call the cops right now!

You'll be behind the bars! Call the cops!

You're a fucking idiot!

And you're a bloody kisser!

No wonder your fiancé did a number on you!

Okay, Sarafaraz, Jogi, enough is enough, man!

- You need to behave yourselves... - And where were you guys?

He could have hurt me!

Motherfucker!

I'm going to fucking fuck you up!

Bloody bastard! Let's go!

Can we go now?

Yo.

Fuck me!

I really think we should get this footage out of here.

Yes, please.

She's just a kid, man.

Calling Sarfaraz Khan for the party was Joginder's bright idea.

Yes, but Joginder didn't know that Harsimran

would publicly kiss Sarfaraz Khan, lip-to-lip and will embrace the family.

You mean "embarrass."

You got it, right?

Look, the important thing is Harsimran did not kiss the hero.

The photograph is clicked from the wrong angle.

Come on, Mr. Mann!

Excuse me! You don't believe us?

Do you want to call off the wedding, Balwinder?

We can also call off the joint venture.

Please! That's not what I am suggesting.

Jogi and Harsimran are children.

These wedding planners should have known better.

Jogi wanted Sarfaraz there!

But, son, you could have handled it better.

See, if Shashi Kapoor were to come for my wedding

and wanted to kiss me...

would I have been able to resist him?

Anyway...

it's my son who's been shown in poor light here.

Yes, we need to do some damage control.

We have to kill the Twitter buzz.

If, Jogi and Harsimran take a romantic picture

and Instagram it, I think it'll really help.

See what you can do.

He's furious right now.

I'm not sure if he'll talk to Harsimran...

but sure, make the video.

Twat it.

"Tweet."

Well, I'll stick to "twat!"

You got problem? Huh?

This is unbelievable!

Ali, bro, is this your cat?

Yes, we have to do this kind of stuff.

The bride and groom aren't the only attractions anymore.

Hi, Muskaan.

Ignoring me and all?

Oh, look at that!

Srishti, you're doing a lot of work for once!

Hi, monkey! Hi mommy! What's up?

We're looking for a Cinderella dress.

I don't want to be Cinderella.

- It's a princess theme party. - What do you want to be?

- Wonder Woman. - Why?

Because she can fly. She doesn't need a pumpkin carriage.

Good girl!

- Smart! - All hands on deck, guys.

Shibani...

tell Prabhat we'll have a happy

Instagram video of the couple by tomorrow.

Until then we need to squash

- all further stories about this, okay? - Okay.

- Reena. - Okay, ma'am, I'll make it happen.

Sarfaraz's PR team is also here so get the two to co-ordinate, yeah?

- Sure. - Hello?

Start putting out some stories of her three crore trousseau or whatever.

- Okay. - Guys!

Guys, the photo that's going viral has been shared by your company.

- What? - Impossible. We have rules.

No one shares pictures from wedding events.

Oh, really? Who's Jaspreet Kaur?

- Shit. - Jazz?

Where the fuck is she?

You know that... that's a bad word, right?

Yeah.

Dude.

What were you thinking?

Did you think you were a guest at this party?

Next time this happens, you can catch a bus

and go back to Dwarka or Rohini,

or wherever the fuck it is you're from.

You can't stay here tonight.

Return your keys.

And delete all these pictures from Facebook and Instagram.

I'm serious.

Do you have any idea how embarrassing this is for us?

Has anyone seen Jogi?

- Is he okay? - Ma'am, he hasn't eaten anything all day.

He's just been drinking.

Harsimran needs to talk to him.

She tried, apparently.

He screamed at her.

Hmm.

Yes?

Joginder and his family are very religious.

They come to our local Gurudwara.

If Harsimran ma'am goes there to pray and apologize...

You're telling us the only solution is divine intervention?

No one can say no to God.

Seriously?

And Harsimran ma'am can also cook something

for Joginder sir, because he hasn't eaten all day.

Actually, I think it's a great idea.

Good stuff, Jazz!

You were to return after two days.

We finished early.

Make some tea for your father.

Papa, your tea.

The electricity and gas bills are here.

Make sure to pay them.

"Homemade food?"

Cook for him? Pray for him? Are you crazy?

How arranged is this marriage?

You know Jogi and me have never even done it, right?

Let's pray he turns out to be good in bed.

I can't see him, Tara.

He'll kill me.

Why?

Something happened.

You can't tell anyone.

I messed up with Sarfaraz.

- If Jogi finds out, my parents will... - They won't find out.

I went to his room.

In Jogi's hotel.

What about the hotel cameras?

We've removed the footage.

So you knew already?

Yup.

Why'd you do that?

Because, I'm a girl...

and we fuck up sometimes.

He was really hot!

I just had to!

Stop crying! You scored big, girl!

Can we please focus on the problem at hand? Yes? Thank you.

Do you want to marry Jogi?

Yeah, of course!

But I can't deal with this level of drama.

He's hurt. He needs to calm down.

And right now, only you can change that.

Okay?

Hmm?

Okay.

Finally, someone's got her to cook.

What's really interesting...

is that it took a girl from Dwarka

to show a princess from Dubai how to crack open her man's heart.

What's not so interesting is that...

apparently,

all it takes is cooking and praying.

I made this for you.

Please don't say no.

You don't have to marry me.

At the Gurudwara, I could only think of one thing.

Go ahead and call off the wedding if you want to.

But I just need you to know, I didn't do anything.

Feed me some more of that sweet?

Papa told me the picture is taken at the wrong angle.

So stupid!

I know you didn't kiss him.

Lip-to-lip didn't happen for sure.

You'd not do that to me.

You know...

I have no doubts in my heart.

And...

I'm so sorry...

that I doubted you.

Really sorry.

You guys look so romantic in the moonlight!

Can I take a picture?

Sure, why not?

How do you want it? Okay.

Thank you. Good night.

Good night.

I embarrassed you, didn't I?

What can I do? I'm a sardar. Hot headed!

I know you love me.

And I trust you with my life, sweetheart.

I'm just a puppy!

Never leave me, okay?

Mm-hmm.

Hey.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

It's all good.

Get off the phone, babe.

I can't tell you the day I've had.

Is everything okay?

Yeah.

Just crazy, rich people getting married.

Where's Adil?

Apparently, at the factory.

Apparently?

I don't know.

What?

Maybe I'm being really stupid.

I'm listening.

Something's been up with Adil, you know...

Go on.

I mean...

he's just been a bit weird.

I mean...

the way he's on the phone all the time...

his timings are all off...

What are you saying?

You think he's having an affair?

I'm just being paranoid, right?

A little bit.

He's completely into you.

Everyone can see that.

- You're going to drop it. - I'm not going to drop it.

Adil is so hot.

He shouldn't be allowed to get married.

What do you think of the bride?

- What is that? - Digging for gold!

- Are you done? ...Hmm. Cut me another one.

Open up! It's the police!

Bitches!

Fuck off! That's not funny!

Jogi's going to like it.

Why is that so full?

Not anymore.

Cheers!

Look, I'm writing the "J" over here.

Look at it carefully.

Not just "J." Write "Jogi," his full name.

Yeah and he won't be able to find it. Promise.

Can I say something?

He's really good at heart.

Fuck!

Harsimran, are you okay?

Babe? Harsimran!

Hey, babe! Harsimran!

Karan! Come in!

Babe!

Babe, no... It's okay.

Let it out, okay?

- It's just your 17th Simo...mimosa! - Hey!

All right? No, no! Just...

It's okay. What? It's okay.

- It's okay! It happens. - It doesn't happen!

The bride doesn't sleep with the celebrity guest!

- Shut up! - Okay, just go see no one comes in.

I got her.

I lied to him.

It's okay, relax.

I lied to him...

I'm going to die from this guilt.

No, no, just breathe. Just breathe.

He's such a fucking nice guy and I cheated on him!

It's okay.

- I really love him! - Yeah, of course you do!

No!

I properly fell in love with him last night.

- Okay, so that's good thing, right? - How?!

He'll dump my ass if he finds out what I did!

I'm a horrible person.

No! No, sweetheart! You're a 22 year-old-girl!

- It's okay. - I have to tell him.

I have to be honest. What do I do?

Okay, listen that depends on what you want.

- No! - No, no! Stop crying!

Think about it. What do you really want?

- I want a happy marriage. - Right?

Then, sweetheart...

you're going to have to shut the fuck up!

It's over. It's done with.

It's your little secret. Just take it with you,

bury it deep in the ground.

- But what about honesty? - Baby, that boat has sailed. Okay?

Now just be wise, be kind.

Huh?

Listen, you'll have your whole life to make it up to him. Okay?

Okay, from now on you'll never lie to him. Yeah?

Promise?

- Yeah, promise. - Thank you!

Okay.

Okay, okay, just...

Okay!

Okay, one sec... One second.

It's okay. Okay?

- Shall we go? Huh? Come. - Thank you.

There she is.

I love you!

Okay, let's go!

She's cute, right?

- She's okay. - Yeah, yeah!

You have high standards, bro.

Have you seen Pavni there?

She moves really well.

Hey, who's Pavni?

- That girl in the ponytail. Nehru house. - You like Pavni now?

She's hot.

Hot, huh?

So...

should I cancel my ticket?

We go through this every single time.

Well, I'm waiting for you to tell me to stay.

I...I worry about your job.

Oh, my job.

Because Twitter's going to shut down if I'm a day late.

Two years.

Two years, I've been coming to see you

on my fucking work trips, okay?

I'm just asking, for once could you do a fucking wedding in the US?

I mean, for God's sake!

Do you want to head out for a bit?

No.

Let's stay home and watch Vinyl House videos.

That's why you're the best.

Don't you miss it?

I mean, look at this.

This is just great.

I think...

you have to open it up again.

Look how happy you are!

First of all...

I would like to thank my team.

Without whom, none of this would be possible!

Yes!

Second of all, where it all started...

my mother and my father, thank you!

And last, but not least...

my beautiful wife, Tara.

I have been busy...

I have been distracted...

and she has been nothing but supportive.

Tara, all of this is for you!

Cheers! Congratulations!

On that...

On that note, everybody, please get a drink!

Yes?

And do take the tour!

- Well done, my boy! - Thank you, Papa.

- You're welcome. - Thank you, Ma. Cheers!

- Congratulations! - Let's take a picture.

Come on, big smile!

- Nicely done, babe. - Thank you.

Hey...

Adam has a proposal for me.

Is it okay if I get into bed with him?

That's amazing!

So everything's okay?

Yeah.

Hey, it's your mother.

Why didn't you tell me you were coming?

My son-in-law invited me, how could I not come?

You don't invite us.

Hello.

He opened up another factory! You've hit the jackpot!

You've come to a classy party.

Don't act like a bitch from the streets.

That's our home you're talking about.

It used to be yours as well.

Hi!

Aren't you going to introduce us?

- That's my mum. My sis. - Hi.

- Hello. - It's nice to meet you.

Ruchi.

Hi! Nice to meet you.

Is it the first time that you guys are coming here?

- Where are you taking me? - This is the tour.

Noisy!

Music! Music to my ears!

- Congratulations! - Thank you.

- I'm impressed. - Really?

Show me.