Original subtitles

>> Yeah.

oh, yes.

yeah, right there.

oh, yeah!

yeah. yeah.

[beeping stops, moaning

continues]

oh, yeah!

yeah! oh, yeah!

oh, yeah!

>> * got myself in trouble

* i thought i'd be all right

* but tonight is not my night

* i know it just because

* when i look out the window

>> good morning.

>> morning.

>> * i see it's still raining

* everybody's here

>> you're up early.

>> yep.

what?

you could've done his friend if

you wanted to.

>> you know i'm seeing someone.

>> oh, yes -- what's-his-face.

>> mark.

>> you've been out with him --

what? -- three times now.

>> four.

>> what the fuck are you waiting

for?

>> * oh, i'm feeling all the

things you are *

* and what you have in store

will bring me joy *

* i'm feeling all the things you

are *

* and what you have in store

will bring me joy *

>> i will transfer you, if you

could just hold please.

crap. oh, shit.

>> hi. i'm hannah silver.

>> first day?

>> dude, she was, like,

dripping.

>> damn!

>> i know.

i've never made someone actually

squirt like that.

squirt -- that's what you should

call her.

>> hey.

have you guys met the new girl

yet?

>> hi.

>> this is hannah.

she's my friend, so be nice to

her and make her feel at home,

okay?

>> welcome to the team.

>> thank you.

>> yeah. see you around.

>> oh, what a miserable dick he

is.

he thinks just 'cause he banged

every girl in the office he's

some kind of superhero.

>> really? every...?

>> well, practically every.

not me.

>> sorry, we were --

>> yeah, thanks for joining us.

sit down.

all right.

now that we're all here...

let's get into what this

perspective account is all

about.

hannah silver.

what does this make you think

of?

come on, what do they teach you

in those mbas?

first thing that comes into your

mind.

>> um...

>> pops in your head.

boom. pah!

>> condoms.

>> hannah silver, everyone.

so, um...

how do we get from, uh, from

here to...

there?

meet fred fierce's new brand of

vodka.

>> who?

>> exactly.

i had a meeting with mr. fierce

last week.

okay, so, this isn't necessarily

the newest strategy by any

means, but mr. fierce would like

to have the consumers

specifically associate his

liquor with...

>> sex.

>> he suggested we call the

product, um...

"get it."

>> like, "girl, you're gonna get

it."

>> oh. yes.

i didn't -- i didn't get that.

>> from him.

>> exactly like that.

that's what he means.

>> mm.

>> yeah, but we can't use that.

>> so we're supposed to try and

market this like it's legal

roofies, like "you gonna get

it"?

that's what we're...

>> you gonna get -- you gonna

get it.

>> get it.

>> bob, i'm hearing that, and

i'm thinking that it sounds

immoral.

>> all right, i'm gonna need

some, uh, some seriously

targeted research on this.

silver, i think this would be a

good opportunity for you to, you

know, just to dig in and --

and -- and get your hands dirty,

and, abrams, you're my -- you're

my top research guy.

i need you to take her out, you

know, and -- and show her the

ropes.

um, is it hot in here, or is it

just me?

my -- my lips feel like dead

worms.

okay, good meeting, everybody.

>> do you ever sell anything

without using sex?

>> no.

you're just lucky you get to go

out in the field.

you need to expense everything,

okay?

i'll show you how to fill out

those reports later.

>> dude, you are so gonna fuck

her.

>> her?

>> yeah, man.

>> dude, that is a terrible,

terrible idea.

>> okay, that's never stopped

you before.

>> yeah, but did you hear that

chick?

condoms.

>> dude, she's a total prude.

she'd probably shatter.

>> i had a really great time

tonight.

>> so did i.

>> i just...

i really want to take things

slow.

>> okay.

>> good night.

>> good night.

>> yeah!

yeah!

>> oh, yeah.

yeah, yeah, faster, faster!

oh, yes, yes!

oh, yeah, yeah, just like that!

just like -- ooh!

>> you need to get a new bed.

>> you need to put some boys in

yours.

>> why is everything always

about sex with you?

>> it's human nature.

it's animal instinct.

>> well, i'd like to think i'm

more evolved than that.

>> eww.

second notice to pay fine.

>> did we get a first?

>> the ticket is the first.

seriously, you have a master's

degree, and you don't know that?

>> 1,000 fucking dollars?!

>> well, maybe you can find some

brilliant way to write it off on

your taxes.

>> oh, um, i'm not paying this.

>> well, then, you can go to

court.

there's a date printed on there.

>> it was your party.

>> yeah, for your birthday.

plus, i wasn't the one hanging

out the window howling like a

wolf at 3:00 in the morning.

that award goes to you.

>> well, you know how i get when

i drink.

>> i do.

i kind of wish you did it more.

>> when you want something, you

just... crawl to it.

roll over on your back.

and your hands should be on your

beautiful bodies, ladies.

okay, just squeeze hard.

you're -- just trust your

foundation.

you're gonna get this, i

promise.

now take this hand and clamp it

down here.

good. all right.

and just let go.

yeah, that's it.

perfect. good job.

>> hey, maria called and is

sick.

>> again?

>> i'm telling you, she is

pregnant.

also, we have three more women

call about...

blow-job classes.

>> still?

we don't do that.

>> most of them are actually

just housewives from jersey,

too.

you'd think that they would, you

know, have that skill down pat

by now.

>> mm.

do you want to teach that class?

>> oh, no. oh, no. i'm not gay.

>> aw, so you want to put an ad

out for someone who can

demonstrate sucking dick?

'cause i don't.

>> okay, moving along.

we also had one of these again.

psycho-christian, puritanical,

you know, cease and desist, or

whatever.

>> write them a letter back

saying that they need to get

laid.

>> okay, yeah, i'm gonna do

that.

i'll get right on top of that.

>> good.

>> yep.

>> got a minute to go over the

game plan?

>> of course.

>> okay, so, i figure we hit up

these places, ask a few

questions, write down a few

answers.

>> i know how it works.

>> okay.

well, the highlighted ones are

owned by some friends of mine,

so we could go to those first.

>> fire and ice?

isn't that a strip club?

>> yes.

look, this project might require

some investigation you might not

be used to.

is that gonna be, like, a

problem for you?

>> you think i can't handle a

strip club?

>> you should take it as a

compliment.

>> put this on.

>> what? what is it?

>> it's my "come hither" shirt,

and i'm letting you borrow it

tonight.

>> tonight?

>> ben's party.

you'll thank me later.

>> oh, shit. i forgot.

would you hate me if i bailed?

>> yes.

the poor kid only has two

friends of his own coming.

you have to come, you have to

have fun, and maybe you'll even

have sex.

>> oh, really? with whom?

>> anyone at this point.

that shirt is man bait --

if you wear it properly.

how do i look?

>> great.

>> but if you were a guy, would

you want to fuck me?

can we have two beers please?

forget it.

>> i just don't understand why

you need to meet a guy who just

wants to fuck you.

>> and i don't understand

wanting to be a sexually

repressed possession.

tomato, to-mah-to.

>> "possession"?

i may not have given mark the

best sex of his life yet, but i

have him right where i want him.

>> really?

>> mm-hmm.

>> and what are you getting out

of that?

ooh!

birthday boy!

>> happy birthday.

good to see you.

>> spilled your virgin cosmo.

>> it is a whiskey.

>> big-boy drink tonight.

>> yes, it is.

>> how's your birthday, ben?

>> it's been really good.

>> all: cheers.

>> i'm a man.

>> you got this, right?

>> every -- every birthday.

>> let me buy you a drink.

>> i don't normally take candy

from strangers, but... all right.

>> and she's in.

>> so is he.

oh, my god.

>> what?

what is it?

>> um...

nothing. i...

i just... thought i saw someone i

knew.

>> that's fine.

i'll just stay here till you get

back from the bathroom, i guess.

>> and that, my little protã©gã©,

is how it's done.

>> so, you're saying that i

should just bump into some hot

chick and then she'll buy me a

drink?

>> well, it's different for

guys.

>> of course. right.

>> where's hannah?

>> uh, bathroom, i think some of

tonight may be coming back up.

>> already?

will you hold this?

just a second.

>> it's me.

what are you doing?

>> crisis... management.

>> what's going on?

>> mark is here.

>> hannah, it's like a sign from

god that you need to fuck him.

i'm gonna walk you through this.

>> no, not alone.

>> well, a threesome at this

point is out of the question.

>> no!

i mean mark is not here alone.

i just saw him kissing some

other girl.

god, i'm so stupid.

>> hannah, you are not stupid.

a little prude, maybe, but not

stupid.

>> i'm so sick of being a nice

girl.

what does that even mean,

anyway?

definitely doesn't mean i get

what i want.

>> hannah...

life is not about getting what

you want, okay?

it's about taking what you want.

if you want him, go out there

and get him.

you do want him, don't you?

>> no, i don't want some other

girl's sloppy seconds.

>> well, what do you want then?

>> i don't know.

maybe i just need some

professional help.

>> what, like an escort?

>> no, like a therapist.

>> you don't need therapy.

you just need to get wasted.

come on. let's go.

>> * um... what?

* they said, "hey, girl,

do your thang, do your thang,

do your thang" *

* hey, girl, do your thang,

do your thang, do your thang *

>> * bring it back

* bring it back

* bring it back

* bring it back

>> this air-fucking is at least

a small step forward.

>> she's been unleashed.

it's kind of turning me on.

>> * if you try to holla,

try to kick some game *

* he said you go hard-hard in

the paint *

* and i told him ah, no

* he said can i get your...

to put in my iphone *

* 1-800-65-no

>> you know you could be even

naughtier, right?

>> yeah, i want to fuck him like

this.

>> he has no idea what he's

missing.

hey, hannah.

see that guy there?

he wants all of this.

>> he does?

>> yeah, and he wants to come

home with you tonight, if you

want him to.

>> yes.

>> * i'll show you yours

if you show me mine *

>> stop complaining and make

some coffee.

>> uh-oh -- cranky-morning

leslie.

>> do you guys have to be so

loud?

>> no, no, no, no, no.

don't provoke her.

she didn't get any last night.

>> i'm sorry.

maybe if hannah would've made my

sacrifice worthwhile, we could

all enjoy a lovely morning

together.

>> the massive amounts of vodka

we drank aren't helping any,

either.

>> there was also a lot of

champagne.

>> don't say champagne.

ohh.

>> what were you thinking,

trying to set me up when i was

blackout-drunk?

>> when else are you gonna let

some guy fuck your brains out?

hello. i'm trying to help you.

>> okay, i don't want to fight

about this, okay?

helping me catch an std is not

helping me.

>> i'm sorry that you've become

so frigid since "he who shall

not be named" that i practically

have to arrange a date-rape for

you to get some.

>> you want to help me?

find me someone to sleep with

who's not a complete asshole.

>> hannah, did you ever think,

maybe, that if you were fucking

mark already, he wouldn't have

been kissing some other girl

last night?

>> or maybe he still would.

>> well, you got to fuck them

before they fuck you.

>> do you think that dude's

gonna fall for you before you

even give him a taste?

>> it's not like i'm a prude or

something.

>> look.

i don't believe in love, okay?

i believe in orgasms.

>> becoming a slut isn't gonna

solve my problems.

>> what are you talking about?

sex fixes everything.

>> you think i'm a slut?

>> i think it would do you some

good to lay off the pounding for

a while.

i also think i'd appreciate the

quiet so i could get some sleep.

i'm not saying you're a slut.

but you can hardly go two days

without shuttling someone new

into your bed.

that's not normal.

>> well, maybe i don't want to

be normal.

but that's my choice.

i can go for -- without sex for

as long as it takes for you to

sleep with 100 guys.

>> would you like to bet on

that?

oh, no. i'm sorry.

no, i was just wondering

about...

>> actually...

yes.

yes, i would.

if hannah just bangs 10 guys, i

will totally "re-vi."

>> re-vi?

>> re-virginize.

>> really?

deal.

you sleep with anyone before i

get to 10, you have to go to

court for our ticket.

>> that just gives you six

weeks.

>> just because she's never done

it doesn't mean she can't do it.

>> yes, of course.

>> you didn't know me before my

whole phase.

2001 was a good year.

i must've fucked 20 guys that

summer.

changed my life.

>> wait.

you -- you fucked guys?

>> yes.

before i fucked women, i fucked

guys.

before i fucked guys, well, i

was hannah.

>> yeah, but i mean she's, like,

nothing like you.

>> you underestimate her.

leslie without sex, on the other

hand, is completely incapable.

>> i believe in leslie.

i think she has more discipline

and willpower than you realize.

>> how much?

>> how much what?

>> how much do you believe in

her?

enough to make a friendly wager?

>> he seems nice.

>> silver, what was that?

dates.net?

>> no.

no.

>> yes.

>> no.

>> yes.

>> yes.

i was doing... research.

market research.

it's an important psychographic

to look at these dating sites.

>> i like it.

i like your thinking.

very clever.

>> thank you.

>> lunch meeting tomorrow.

>> yeah.

>> hey.

we still on for saturday?

>> i thought friday?

>> no, i got a date on friday.

>> well, i have a date on

saturday.

>> uh-huh.

sorry.

>> i'll see if i can move it.

>> meet me here at 7:00.

>> okay.

>> seriously, ben?

>> you do know that other people

have hobbies that don't involve

rubbing naked bodies together,

right?

>> i do have other hobbies.

>> like what?

>> like my job.

>> a job is not a hobby.

>> you look hot.

>> i'm nervous.

>> why?

well, you could show a little

more boob.

but they'll come out later, so

what's the rush, right?

>> right. what if i mess up?

>> you put out.

how can you mess that up?

>> what if he doesn't want to

have sex yet?

right -- all men want to have

sex always.

>> look, if you're gonna get

through this, you're really

gonna have to figure out how to

keep your hands and your mouth

as busy as possible in your free

time.

>> 'kay.

>> like this. like -- look.

that's fun -- exotic yarns.

>> what if i'm bad at it?

it's been a while.

>> it'll all come back to you,

like riding a bike.

>> what if they think the sex

means something?

>> after one date?

no man will ever complain about

you having sex with him and not

wanting to see him again.

they're just not wired that way.

that's why they're men.

just have a few drinks to loosen

up -- just a few, not so many

that you vomit on him, okay?

>> inhibitions out the door.

she's gonna break some hearts.

>> she better break some balls.

hello, old friend.

we meet again.

>> so, then i just decided that

all i ever wanted to do was

teach.

i mean, all of the most

important people in my life have

been teachers or someone who's

taught me something.

>> uh-huh.

>> but i think that being a good

teacher is knowing that some

kids you can impact and some you

can't.

you know?

>> yes.

i completely understand.

>> you know, you're the first

person i've met off the website.

me too.

>> i really like you.

>> i really like you, too.

>> ohh.

uh...

oh, fuck!

>> so...

>> will you take me home?

>> um, yes.

>> this is my bedroom.

>> uh-huh.

you're so cute.

>> thank you.

>> mm.

>> are you okay?

>> yeah. yes.

>> you sure?

>> yeah.

yes.

>> just relax.

>> are we alone in the

apartment?

>> there's no one in my room.

is there anyone in your room?

>> obviously not.

>> okay, just checking.

>> i really need you to just do

two things for me right now.

one -- coffee.

two -- tell me that you got

plowed like a cornfield last

night.

>> well...

>> is that cum on your bra?

>> yeah, it got messy.

>> he had to pull out?

have i taught you nothing?

go from no sex at all to doing

it in the raw?

>> um, we didn't exactly have

sex.

>> what?

>> we didn't exactly have sex.

>> what do you mean didn't have

sex?

>> well, i mean, we fooled

around.

why are you walking like that?

because while you were busy

giving seventh-grade blow jobs

and not even swallowing last

night...

i hurt myself.

>> it wasn't exactly a blow job.

i mean, i just started touching

it, and then, all of a sudden,

before i knew it... pew!

>> did you forget that that's

how the penis works?

you really are a 12-year-old in

the body of a 25-year-old,

aren't you?

>> all right, last night was

just a warm-up.

i had to become friends with the

penis again.

>> how many times a day do you

think about sex?

>> at least...

four times an hour.

>> okay.

and what triggers your thoughts

about sex?

>> hannah.

you can't just keep your eyes on

the paper when you're

interviewing people.

you have to look them in the

eyes, make them feel

comfortable, make them feel

safe, read their facial

expressions, their body

language.

it's more than just asking

questions and then writing it

down on the page.

>> okay, next question.

do you think you need to impress

a woman to get her into bed with

you?

>> yeah, or pay her.

>> if you were trying to get a

girl to go home with you, what

would you do?

>> buy her a drink maybe?

>> yeah?

what kind of drink would you buy

her?

>> whatever she wants.

>> whatever she likes.

how many drinks do you think

you'd buy her?

>> as many as it takes, man.

>> as many as it takes.

>> take a look at this.

you know what i'm saying?

>> are there any brands of vodka

here that you think would

impress a woman?

>> yeah, sure.

you know, anything with a good

label on it, you know?

flying dove -- they love that.

they love the feathers or

something about it.

you know, something like that --

that frosty bottle.

>> yes.

"frosty bottle."

>> excuse me.

>> sorry.

>> that's okay.

someone's birthday?

>> oh, um, no, i'm just teaching

myself how to bake.

reminding myself, rather.

>> it looks like it's gonna be

something delicious.

>> actually, i don't know what

it's gonna be yet.

>> cooking for a boyfriend,

or...?

>> no.

>> so you're single.

>> um... yes, and no.

>> so i could ask you for your

number, but i shouldn't.

i definitely can't ask you out

on a date, right?

>> not really, no.

>> i see.

i just wanted to try whatever

you were baking, so...

sorry.

>> you don't know what it is

yet.

>> you don't, either.

that's what makes it kind of

enticing.

>> i suppose we could arrange

for a tasting.

it seems innocent enough.

>> all right.

>> what? you don't think so?

>> i don't know.

it was a little weird.

>> why?

>> asking guys questions about

sex with topless dancers shaking

their boobies three feet away.

>> oh, my god.

how did you get to be so

uptight, silver?

>> i'm not uptight.

it's just what have we really

learned today?

that guys need to pay women or

get them drunk or high to get

laid?

how is that enlightening?

>> it just helps us market our

product.

>> it's depressing.

>> why is that so depressing?

>> it doesn't matter.

we got what we needed.

>> no, really, i'm curious to

know why that's so depressing.

>> just forget i said anything.

>> i can't.

i want to know, really.

why is it depressing?

>> you're my co-worker, not my

friend.

let's just keep it professional.

>> okay.

>> i can't believe you still

want me to go to this.

>> you said you would.

>> yeah, but that was before i

swore off sex for like an

eternity.

>> six weeks is not an eternity.

you're my plus-1, just like i'm

yours.

do you think i enjoy going to

all your aerial dance parties

and watching you and your

friends climb poles for no tips?

>> yes.

>> whatever, that's not the

point.

>> look, that church next door

dropped a class twice today with

their fanatical phone calls.

i'm already having a tortured

day.

i'm already having a tortured

day, and now i have to go

a new york city firemen's party

and keep my hands to myself?

>> aww, every addict has to face

their vice eventually.

>> let's be clear about why i'm

going.

>> because you love me.

>> because you need my help.

and you are bringing home a man

tonight, even if i have to drag

them by the dick to make it

happen -- just this once,

though.

after that, you're on your own,

bitch.

i mean that in the most loving

way possible.

>> mm.

>> anyway, let's find you a man

and get the fuck out of here.

>> okay, but remember, i am here

for work.

>> hey, ladies.

>> this is tracy.

she organized the whole thing.

>> leslie.

>> nice to meet you.

oh, my god, right?

>> yeah. which one do you like?

>> neither.

i only hook up with guys with

trust funds or fortune 500

companies.

but they're nice to look at.

>> they are.

>> what are you ladies talking

about?

>> you, obviously.

>> obviously?

do you need a drink?

>> always.

>> well, that's my project

partner.

you would attract him.

>> i'm just playing.

he clearly has bad taste,

anyway.

>> here you go.

what'd i miss?

>> we were just discussing what

bad taste you have.

>> really?

what, you don't like microbrews?

>> i mean the starfish.

>> what do you mean, starfish?

>> heterosexual position?

>> okay.

>> it still gives you a place to

stick it, right?

>> absolutely.

>> he's cute.

>> i say we leave and take him

with us.

>> i don't even know him.

>> sure, you do.

his name's rufus.

>> you know what i mean.

>> well, you didn't know website

guy, either.

>> pete?

>> whatever.

>> well, at least i had a

profile i could read.

i felt like i knew him.

>> i don't want you to take this

the wrong way, but i think you

know from experience that you

can know someone for a few years

and never really know them.

>> i am sorry.

i don't know how to get rid of

him.

when i asked him to come home

with us, he just assumed i meant

both of them.

>> are they attached at the hip

or something?

fucking men.

>> what do you want me to do?

i can just tell him to forget

it.

>> you're getting laid tonight,

okay?

i will deal with this.

>> wait.

um...

i haven't done this in a while.

>> it's okay.

i'll be gentle.

>> want to watch something?

>> i want to watch you.

>> me?

you want to watch me dance?

hannah, you better be getting so

fucked right now.

>> you're my freaky little

sideshow.

>> oh, paul, do you know what

i'm really into?

>> what's that?

>> golden showers.

>> you okay?

>> yeah. yeah.

>> what the fuck are you so

happy about?

oh, right.

you got laid last night.

>> it wasn't like that.

it was nice.

>> great.

one down, nine to go.

and don't go getting all

touchy-feely on me.

he was short and stupid.

do better next time.

>> we didn't even exchange

numbers or anything.

it's really freeing, actually.

>> welcome to the dark side.

>> do you smell something?

like... pee?

>> don't ask.

you don't mind if i have a

friend over later, do you?

you'll probably be out, anyways.

>> a friend?

>> yes, a friend.

>> john.

tim.

gordon.

philip.

scott.

why don't we interview women?

>> because men drink more than

women do, and that's the market

that we're working with.

>> but haven't you ever heard of

ladies' night?

all the ladies show up, so then

the guys want to be there, too.

>> don't you think that's kind

of a simplistic model to go on?

>> will?

>> yeah.

>> if there is a vodka that

every hot girl you knew wanted

to drink, wouldn't you always

want to have it on hand?

>> for shizzle.

>> i see what you're doing.

>> what are some things a man

could do to impress you in a

bar?

>> um, he could call me a latina

lovebug.

i like that because i'm jewish,

and when a man thinks i'm latina

or italian or something, i

just -- it brings out the

spiciness in me.

>> um...

i don't -- i don't really talk

to men in bars at all.

>> eff guys, you know?

like, it's just about, like,

chatting, like, talking about

guys, but, like, no guys.

>> would you be more impressed

with a man buying you a

top-shelf liquor as opposed to

well liquor or beer?

>> yes.

>> and why is that?

>> because they're more

expensive.

>> definitely a top-shelf liquor

because that means they're rich.

>> well liquor.

>> oh, you do like to be bought

cheap liquor?

>> yes.

>> okay.

if there was a new vodka coming

out, say, called fierce vodka,

that was geared specifically

towards women, what would

interest you in buying that

vodka?

>> maybe if you want to make

like a vodka that your campaign

is like, "drink this and listen

and communicate."

>> get a naked man to be the

spokesmodel.

>> eww, i hate vodka.

>> you know, maybe -- maybe put

the bottle somewhere in this

area of his body.

>> how many drinks would it take

for you to go home with a guy?

>> a guy walks up to you.

he's attractive.

how many drinks would you say he

would need to buy you before

you, you know, go home and have

sex with him?

>> fucking asshole.

>> that's, uh...

yeah.

>> that went well.

>> yeah, it was awesome.

>> it went great.

i feel really fantastic.

they love me.

>> this is a good look for me.

i think i'll leave the female

interviews up to you.

>> wow.

i'm already in charge of my own

area.

that is quite some progress for

two weeks.

>> calm down.

don't let it go to your head.

so, what's with the sudden

fascination with trying to help

guys get laid?

>> maybe i'm helping women.

>> well, helping women is

helping guys.

>> well, you would know.

>> what's that supposed to mean?

>> just a guy like you would

know a thing or two about

getting laid.

>> wait. a guy like me?

>> i should go.

>> no. what? come on.

stay. it's early.

we're celebrating.

we're talking.

stay. don't go. come on.

>> i guess two rejections in one

night would be a lot for you.

>> cheers.

wine?

>> yes, i've heard it's good to

drink in the evenings.

>> that's either really sweet or

really sleazy.

>> i was raised well.

>> as long as you're not trying

to get me drunk.

>> rest assured, i am just using

you for your cupcakes.

is that why men are so shallow?

>> we are not shallow.

we are simple, okay?

>> you're shameless is what you

are.

>> look, just because a guy can

get laid doesn't mean he can get

what he wants.

>> isn't that all they want?

you really don't know shit about

guys, do you?

>> you really do not know shit

about women.

>> well, you women certainly are

complicated creatures to figure

out.

takes years of practice, and i

got kind of a late start.

>> how late?

>> like 18 late.

>> shut up!

>> what? you don't believe me?

>> no.

>> i was in high school.

i was waiting for love.

>> that's awesome.

just laugh it up.

this girl broke my heart --

crushed me.

>> i'm sorry.

>> what about you?

how old were you?

>> that's none of your business.

>> don't do that.

come on.

was it a college romance,

thought you were gonna marry the

guy?

>> no.

um...

i was 14.

>> 14?

>> i was a very free-spirited

adolescent, and he was my best

friend.

>> so, what happened with this

guy?

>> um...

he's gay now.

>> oh, silver. ouch.

>> no, it's okay. it's okay.

but let's just say it wasn't

exactly the best, so i didn't do

it again for a while.

but high school brought other

kinds of crazy behavior.

>> really?

like what kind of crazy

behavior?

>> like...

streaking.

>> streaking?

>> what?

you never went through a

rebellious phase?

>> wow.

how many did you make?

>> i'm not gonna answer that.

>> are we sitting here?

>> yes.

>> okay.

>> have a seat.

>> i am stoked.

>> you ready?

>> yep. bring 'em on.

holy cow.

>> everything you dreamed of and

more.

>> well, i have to taste them

first, but...

they look very promising.

should i -- any one?

>> yeah.

>> i'll try this guy.

mmm.

everything and more.

>> yes!

i keep discovering all these...

talents i forgot i had.

>> let me guess -- a recent

breakup?

>> something like that.

>> i know how that goes.

it's how i got back into my art.

i guess everyone needs an outlet

at some point, right?

what did you put in this?

>> date-rape drugs.

tastes like it.

oh, my god.

>> i can't believe you talked me

into doing this.

>> i think that the adult

beverages did a little more

talking than i did.

>> oh, my god, this is so

against the rules!

>> oh, fuck the rules.

>> shut up.

>> fuck the rules!

>> shut up.

you're nervous!

>> um... i think it's not so much

nervous as it is that i feel

like i'm on some fucking lame

corporate retreat and we have to

do some fucking trust exercise

for the benefit of team morale,

except for it's like totally...

naked.

>> look, this is your idea, and

i'm not doing it unless you do

it.

>> i'm gonna do it!

>> ohh, so much for keeping

things professional.

>> it's a cold night, so don't,

uh... judge me.

>> both: ready?

>> okay. one...

>> both: two...

three.

>> aah!

>> you're alone.

>> yeah, no takers tonight.

>> you better get on that shit.

only four more weeks.

>> i thought it was five.

>> don't remind me.

careful with those.

they blunt your libido.

>> we land this account, this

could mean huge things for us --

huge things, not least of which

would be the presenting of the

campaign at the brand launch

over the summer.

i'm, uh, meeting with fierce's

people tomorrow, so, uh, it's

due day, folks.

hit me with your ideas, whatever

you got.

it's sink or swim, kids. go.

>> we found the key was luxury,

so, you know, you develop a

cachet of luxury around the

vodka, make it seem impressive.

>> yeah?

>> yeah.

>> that's great.

everyone does luxury, will.

that's so...

i mean, i don't need my vodka to

wear diamond and pearls and

little fur coats, do you?

i mean, you know, that's --

yeah.

we're done with that one.

thank you.

anything else? come on. hit me.

let's go.

>> market the vodka to women?

>> yeah, great idea, silver,

except men drink between two to

three times more than women, so

that's market value 101, so,

yeah.

anything else? come on.

>> if we want to convince men

that this vodka will help them

with women, we have to make this

vodka every woman's vodka.

the men will buy it.

i -- donny and i interviewed a

lot of women with no brand

loyalty whatsoever.

it's an untapped market.

>> it's true. she's right.

>> it's risky.

but i like it.

i like it.

silver... good work.

that's what we're going with.

>> so, how should i celebrate?

>> he may have some ideas.

>> him?

he's practically a model.

and even if he was straight, do

you really think he'd want to

sleep with me over other models?

>> i saw how he was looking at

you.

he's straight.

models don't even eat enough

calories to fuck.

trust me.

my last girlfriend was so

anorexic, she couldn't even get

wet.

>> you're hot.

you're a baller.

get over there and make your

move.

>> this place is boring me.

>> we could go somewhere more

interesting.

>> * they all want a piece

* they all want a piece of me

* ah, ah, ah, ah

* they all want a piece

* they all want a piece of me

* no, no, no, no

* how i'm gonna set

* how i'm gonna set them up

* yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

* well, i'm gonna eat

* i'm gonna eat them up

* yeah, feel me

* they dig me

* do you know me?

* if they make you feel,

you better start to peel your

skin *

* you got to make them squeal

before you give them an in *

>> whoa! aah!

i'm okay.

>> * if you let them swim

they'll be grabbing at your

shorts *

* oh

* you better start them out,

yeah *

* you better start them out so

you win *

* and if you don't watch out

* you might be hanging out

with a has-been *

* oh, no

* yes, that ain't good for the

neighborhood that you're in *

yes! ahh!

>> * ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah

* ah-ah-ah-ah-ah, yeah

* no, no, no, no, no, no, no

>> * they all want a piece

* they all want a piece of me

* no, no, no, no

* they all want a piece

* they all want a piece of me

* no, no, no, no

* but i'm gonna tell

* well, i'm gonna...

>> do you have any specials not

on the menu?

>> * well, i'm gonna eat

them up *

>> no! wrong one!

>> * i'm gonna eat them up

>> i guess, unless he actually

meant to.

>> maybe.

every man's guilty of accidental

anal at least once.

>> ew, you think so?

>> please.

half of them don't know the

difference.

that's why i prefer women.

>> i think that thing's done,

don't you?

>> it's done when i say it's

done.

>> les, i love you, but you

really need to get out of this

apartment more.

>> knitting is a soothing

activity that helps to ease

otherwise nagging human desires.

>> have you gone christian on

us?

>> shit! i'm gonna be late.

>> wait. where are you going?

>> to see a friend.

>> oh, yes, the "friend."

>> so, what's our count now?

>> eight.

soon to be nine.

i hope you have an outfit that's

court-appropriate.

>> oh, here we go.

what's your art stance?

>> ooh, that's good.

i do the arms behind the back

with the mouth open.

>> that's pretty good.

what do you think?

>> um...

>> i like it.

it reminds me of my childhood

for some reason.

>> really?

>> i don't know.

>> reminds me of milk.

so it's a cow. all right.

>> have you been here before?

>> not in a really long time

because i'm not a...

i'm not very good at this.

>> at what?

>> the whole art thing.

it's a little too abstract for

me.

i'm good at other things.

>> like cupcakes.

>> exactly.

>> i have to go to work soon.

>> on a weekend?

>> take your shoes off here.

>> really?

>> yeah.

>> do you own this place?

>> well, i lease the space.

>> so you teach?

>> yep.

>> did you used to be

a... stripper?

>> no. i used to be a dancer.

>> ah.

>> ballet.

>> can you show me something?

>> seriously?

>> yeah.

>> no, i don't teach men.

i teach women.

>> you can make an exception.

please.

>> okay.

>> yes!

which pole?

>> but it's not all about the

pole -- there's a lot of floor

work involved.

>> that's fine. show me.

oh, my god.

but your butt is touching,

right?

guys can't do stuff like this.

it's kind of unfair.

>> like what?

>> we don't sit around with

other guys and talk about how

fantastic it is to be a man.

>> you know, or remark about how

sexy our bodies are with each

other.

like, "hey, gene, way to work

that pole, gene.

look at -- look at that -- look

at gene's ass.

way to go, man.

you're wonderful."

>> i get it. yeah.

>> yeah.

you women don't realize how good

you have it.

>> yeah, i guess it is a little

unfair.

but it does sort of make up for

like 5,000 years of patriarchy.

>> yeah, maybe a little.

let's do this again.

>> what?

>> hang out.

>> first, you use for my

cupcakes, and now you're gonna

use me for my poles, aren't you?

>> are you gonna use me for

mine?

>> abrams, silver, good.

come on in. sit down.

i never tire of that laughing

panda.

listen.

i want you two leading the

fierce campaign pitch next week.

>> we got it?

>> no. not yet.

but it's down to groundhouse and

us.

they're gonna hear us both on

monday.

>> wait. monday? jesus.

that's...

>> i know. i know. i know.

but, you know, we got in late,

and it's gonna be fine.

we're gonna get this.

abrams, i want you to do that

voodoo magic thing that you do,

all right?

and, silver, i want you to, you

know, turn on the charm and...

we're gonna get this, right?

>> yeah.

>> you're my team.

get the hell out of here.

>> thank you, sir.

oh, my god!

nice work, silver. yeah.

>> yeah, you too.

now we just have to get this

presentation together.

>> yeah, i will -- i'll call

art, have them post some

graphics, and we'll get started

on this thing this afternoon.

>> great.

>> so, um...

yeah.

>> yeah.

>> wait, seth.

i really like you.

>> i really like you, too.

>> can't we just...

take things slow?

>> maybe i'm confused.

>> i can't have sex with you.

>> okay, i -- i wasn't asking

you to.

>> no, i --

i mean, um...

hannah and i have this stupid

bet, and i just can't have sex

for like six weeks, so...

>> a bet?

>> yeah, it's -- there's this

stupid ticket and so it's -- so

it's just...

>> i see.

you -- you can't have sex, so

you're just biding your time

with me?

>> no.

>> yeah, this makes all the

sense in the world now.

>> no, no.

it's not like that, seth.

>> i see.

>> you need some inspiration?

>> you're still here.

i thought everybody left.

>> everybody but me.

you're gonna burn yourself out

in here.

>> well, it's my first

presentation on monday.

i just want to be prepared.

>> you got plenty of time.

got the whole weekend to work on

it.

>> do you ever do actual work?

>> yes, i do.

>> mm.

>> are you ready?

this is actual work. okay.

uh, i'm gonna pass on this one.

hey, you're gonna kill, you

know?

>> we shouldn't -- we shouldn't

do this.

>> i know.

you're home.

>> where else would i be,

fucking a hot guy?

>> or out with your friend.

>> right, my "friend."

>> will things ever be normal

again?

when these torturous six weeks

are up?

>> look, maybe we should just

stop.

this is silly.

>> hannah, i haven't had sex in

over a month because of you.

if you think i'm stopping now,

you're crazy.

>> i think...

i like someone.

>> who?

>> it's bad.

the guy from work.

>> him?

are you out of your fucking

mind?

>> quite possibly.

>> hannah, use your brain.

stop getting attached.

>> i'm not gonna get attached.

i fucked nine guys without

getting attached.

>> yes, you fucked eight nice,

boring dumbasses, and you're

still a complete sucker for the

assholes.

>> i can't believe you.

>> i can't believe you.

you're gonna lose this bet over

some stupid jerk?

get your shit together.

not that i give a shit.

>> hey, mark.

what are you doing sunday?

>> hey.

>> hey.

>> so, where do you want to go

tonight?

>> upstairs.

>> hey, leslie, it's me.

i just -- wow.

i feel like a total jerk leaving

this in a message.

um, i just can't keep hanging

out like this.

it's pretty clear that you don't

like me the way i like you,

so...

>> hello?

>> voicemail, hannah, seriously?

this is really important.

um... my whole studio is trashed,

and i'm here by myself, waiting

for the cops to show up.

can you please come here?

or call me?

i really need you right now.

>> hey.

let me drive.

>> hello?

>> oh, yeah.

>> hello?

>> oh, hannah.

>> don't fuck this up.

>> oh, god.

hold me.

>> shit.

hey.

>> hi.

you're late.

>> yeah, i know. i just --

>> you had a wild night.

>> i just --

>> it's -- don't.

it's -- we don't have time for

that.

so, here's, uh, here's this.

you can take that.

look at it.

i would say to edit it, but we

really don't have time for you

to do that considering the fact

that you're like two hours late.

>> yeah, listen, i'm...

>> look.

the slide designs need final

approval.

can you take care of that?

i have to go do damage control

on another account, and our

presentation's in 30 minutes.

can you do that for me?

>> yes.

yes.

>> okay.

"we are here today to present

you with our latest client, a

revolutionary new liquor product

specially for women.

fierce is the woman's ticket to

sexual freedom, something my

colleague, hannah...

knows a lot about."

what the fuck?

"if you have any questions about

sex or if you just feel like

having some, please contact

her."

what the fuck is this?

what the fuck is this?

>> you didn't like that?

i thought it was pretty good.

>> i knew you were a jerk, but

this is beyond.

>> yeah, well, i guess now we're

even.

>> what are you, 12?

all this because i didn't answer

a text message last night?

>> uh, he's ready for you.

>> i got to go.

>> ready for the big

presentation?

all right, i'll let you prep by

yourself.

>> you don't remember calling me

last night, do you?

>> what?

>> that guy that you fucked, he

cums like a girl, by the way.

>> okay, team, we ready?

>> yep.

>> anything in my teeth?

>> no.

>> okay, good.

ah, mr. fierce.

>> how are ya?

this is the bodyguard.

>> here comes my "a" team.

this is...

>> how are ya?

>> ...donny abrams.

>> mr. fierce.

>> donny.

>> and this is hannah silver.

this is fred fierce and the

bodyguard.

>> sup?

>> sup?

and, so, look, we're not gonna

waste any of your time 'cause

you look like a busy man, so

we're gonna jump right in.

so, take it away.

>> fierce vodka -- a premium

liquor product.

you want it. it wants you back.

it's like the perfect date.

over the course of our research,

we discovered what an incredible

opportunity we have to brand

this product.

now, our branding strategy is to

target women and make this label

a go-to for sophisticated female

drinkers.

>> it truly is an untapped

market.

as women are rarely targeted by

liquor campaigns, they've

developed a very little

loyalty...

>> yeah.

>> ...to liquor brands.

um, by selecting images that

are -- contain an element of

sensuality, we'll communicate a

style that is sleek and feminine

in its appeal, and down the

line, we'll introduce a variety

of flavors.

>> yeah, 'cause who can have

just one, right?

>> donny, last night had nothing

to do with us.

>> hey, you know what?

don't even worry about it,

hannah.

it's okay. it's cool.

i was stupid.

i thought that you were

different.

but you're not.

you're just another slutty

career girl that wanted to

fulfill some fucking office

fantasy.

>> look, i can't believe you,

the man whore to top all man

whores, is judging me.

you can fuck whoever you want

to, but i can't without being a

slut, right?

>> am i just supposed to be okay

with you going and fucking some

other guy?

>> what kind of name is

bootlicker?

>> what do you care?

you're the guy who fucks

everybody!

>> what are you talking about?

who am i fucking right now?

>> everybody in the office,

apparently!

>> that happened, okay?

i did do that!

that was before you!

you can't even wait 48 hours

before going to jump in bed with

some other guy?!

was the sex with me just not

good enough for you, or do you

have some kind of fucking

problem?

>> no.

my only problem was thinking for

a second that maybe you weren't

one of those assholes.

hi.

>> get my message last night?

>> i mean, i haven't listened to

it yet.

>> right.

why would you?

i had the worst night of my life

last night.

and you have no fucking clue

about it.

my studio was destroyed.

my equipment broken.

the mirrors spray-painted.

they wrote "slut" and "whore."

i had to wait by myself for

hours for the cops to get there

and take a report.

and do you know what happened

when they did?

they laughed at me.

"poor, silly stripper."

>> my god, leslie, i'm so sorry.

>> and where were you?

getting laid and ignoring my

calls.

>> no. i --

>> you sent me to voicemail,

hannah.

i don't really want to talk to

you right now.

i needed you, and you weren't

there.

there's nothing else to say,

really.

i need some space.

[hyperstorm's "a happening"

plays]

>> * maybe the way that today

looks the same *

* happy and gray

>> want some hot cocoa?

>> * i can taste yesterday

>> no, if you don't have tea,

then forget it.

thank you.

>> * and goes where it goes

* waiting around

* got my fear out of sight

* what piece of mind in this

bittersweet fight

can be known? *

* what can be known?

* but something is happening

* can't say that i'm knowing

* but something is happening

here *

>> hannah banana.

hi.

>> hey.

>> can i have a seat?

a little chat. come here.

yeah. he's a bad man, huh?

>> yeah.

>> but we are gonna get you

fixed up with a different one

and hopping around in that sack

in no time, right?

>> actually, i was thinking i

should probably take a little

break from men.

>> aha. yes.

maybe.

you know, the art of dã©coupage

is a wonderful way to pass the

time.

hey.

so, uh, that's what i'd

recommend.

oh, bob wanted to see you when

you came in.

he's grumpy today.

>> i don't know what happened.

i think he forgot to take his

pills or something.

>> oh, yeah.

>> i think we all know why we're

here.

>> sir, i am --

>> save it.

you guys...

nailed it.

i don't know what went on in

that conference room, but it was

like magic.

fierce loved that whole -- that

whole women-angle thing, silver.

incredible.

and you --

you've never been better.

>> wait.

are you saying that we got it?

>> yes, we got it!

we got it!

you two -- i mean, yes.

and now look at -- you two have

a campaign to build togeth-- i

want to keep this awesome team

energy like...

antony and cleopatra, cagney and

lacey.

keep you two together, and

you're gonna -- you're gonna

work -- i want you side by side

all the time.

silver and abrams.

this is gonna be great.

congratulations.

silver, nice work.

abrams.

let's watch the laughing panda.

>> what i love about this one --

it attaches to any surface you

like.

>> that's fantastic.

>> so, if you feel like just

sticking it on your bathtub

side...

...giving that a ride.

oh, that rhymed.

>> shelley, you are a poet.

>> hmm, let's see how it works.

>> oh, "walk in the catwalk."

>> are you serious?

do you guys have any real eggs?

>> we don't eat animal products

here.

>> i can't eat this.

>> so go home.

are you really not gonna speak

to hannah again?

>> i know.

have you tried talking to her?

>> no.

>> are you trying to see who can

keep their mouths shut the

longest?

i know it wasn't your fault, but

you hurt her regardless.

sometimes you got to kill your

pride and be the first to talk.

>> i wouldn't even know what to

say.

>> how about "i'm sorry"?

>> i already said i'm sorry.

>> how about "i'm really sorry"?

>> that just seems so clichã© and

meaningless.

>> you know, ben mentioned

they're gonna start cleaning up

the studio this afternoon.

they have enough photos of the

damages.

insurance company finally came.

>> it's been 48 hours, and i

don't even think she's noticed.

>> shit's hard to get off.

>> i'm just gonna go get us some

coffees -- the usu-- skim latte.

>> what are you doing here?

>> i came to help.

>> all of a sudden you care?

>> i cared before, too.

i just --

>> you just sent me to voicemail

and didn't even listen to my

message?

>> yes, okay, i admit i did

that.

but i just thought you were

trying to sabotage the bet for

me.

>> give a shit about the stupid

bet.

>> i did before.

>> yeah, before i thought about

what really mattered.

>> i'm really sorry i wasn't

there.

>> it was kind of like that time

that missy peterson wrote "nasty

slut" on my locker...

except that then you were there

to tell me that she only did it

'cause she was ugly.

>> well, she was.

>> but this time you weren't

there.

i was all by myself.

>> i'm sorry.

[yesterday's revenge's

"lovetune" plays]

>> * warm when i'm sitting

next to you *

* i'd like to lie under the sun

and play for you my tunes *

* if you choose

to sit with me awhile *

* i can turn your world around

and leave you with a smile *

* oh, you don't see things

the same as i do *

>> so, what happened to your

friend?

>> like any other guy -- as soon

as he found out he wasn't

getting laid, he split.

>> i'm sorry.

can you stop saying that?

>> does that mean you forgive

me?

>> yes.

you fucked 10 guys.

i'm proud of you.

>> yeah, i fucked 10 guys, and

one of them got mad and yelled

at me.

>> oh?

he must really like you.

you only fight with the people

you care about.

unlike my friend, who bailed.

>> well, what did you say to

him?

>> how are you getting the paint

off so well?

>> wow. that bad?

>> i told him i couldn't fuck

him, okay?

i told him about the bet.

>> you know, not everyone is

equipped to stand up to you.

you're a very intimidating

person.

do you really think this guy

spent five weeks hanging out

with you 'cause all he cares

about is sex?

no.

>> hello?

>> hey. it's me.

>> what do you want?

>> to talk to you.

can you please open the door?

>> i don't want to.

>> why?

i really want to apologize.

>> you don't owe me anything,

leslie.

you don't like me the way i like

you.

it's fine.

i don't need you to come over

here and give me a pity party.

>> no, but --

i do, seth.

if you could just let me

explain.

>> what do -- what do you mean

you do?

>> i mean i like you.

i really... really do.

>> you like-like me?

>> yes.

>> hi.

>> what are you doing here?

>> we need to talk.

>> okay.

>> do you hate me?

>> no.

i don't hate you.

>> are you sure?

because you said some pretty

awful shit the other day.

>> yeah, well, i heard you

fucking another guy over the

phone.

so that's some pretty awful

shit.

>> i know.

i know.

it really sucks.

what sucks even more is that i

only did it to convince myself

that the sex between us was

meaningless.

i'm sorry.

>> was it?

>> what?

>> was the sex between us

meaningless?

>> what about the bet?

>> fuck the bet.

>> come on in.

>> i mean, that you slept with

every other girl at comack, i

thought it's your pattern.

>> i've done some shit that i'm

not proud of, okay?

well, that makes two of us then.

>> do you think i can talk to

those girls like i talk to you?

do you think that i think about

those girls the way that i think

about you?

i think about you...

all the time.

>> i didn't know that.

i know i fucked it up.

can you at least forgive me so

we can move past this as

professionals?

>> i can't.

>> okay.

>> i don't just want to be

co-workers with you.

>> i'm really sorry.

>> * do-do-do

* do-do-do, do, do, do, do-do

* do, do, do-do, do-do

* do-do-do

* do, do-do, do

>> but the bet was she had to

sleep with 10 guys before then,

and she did.

>> no, no, no, no.

the bet was leslie could hold

out as long as it took hannah to

do that, and she did.

>> i still think i won.

>> i still think you lost.

>> fine. we both won.

>> fine.

so, who's buying lunch?

>> you're buying lunch.

>> i don't think so.

>> oh, yes, you are.

>> no.

>> hi.

i got to go.

>> what?

>> we don't have anywhere to be

till...

11:00.

>> mm.

something i said i'd do.

>> you were able to pry yourself

out of his arms?

>> who are you?

>> not everyone has to sleep

with every guy they go out with.

fine. it was fucking awesome.

let's go.

>> * you rolled me over

* come and walk in to the corner

of your past *

* but you told me

you could turn me on *

* speed it up

* i gotta go, go, go

* ohhhhhh, oooooooh

>> * i know your friend's

the one in the middle *

* if i can't find him,

then it's on to the next one *

* i know

* it sounds cold

* oh, well

* i know your friend's

the one in the middle *

* if i can't find him,

then it's on to the next one *

* i know

* it sounds cold

* oh, well

* it's just not enough

>> * it never was

>> * show me how you love

>> * i needed something

* when i caught you looking

from the corner of my eye *

* tomorrow i got no plans

* it's just a one-night stand

* so let's go, go, go

* ohhhhhh, oooooh

* oooooh, ooooh-ooh

>> * i know your friend's

the one in the middle *

* if i can't find him,

then it's on to the next one *

* i know

* it sounds cold

* oh, well

* i know your friend's

the one in the middle *

* if i can't find him,

then it's on to the next one *

* i know

* it sounds cold

* oh, well

* it's just not enough

>> * it never was

>> * show me how you love

* it's just not enough

>> * it never was

>> * show me how you love

>> * just come on over

and talk to me *

* this fish don't bite

unless you want some teeth *

* don't want no money

* don't want no lovin'

* i just want your...

* 'cause the boys want to hold

you and the guys want to fuck

you and the man want to take you

and motherfucking own you *

* but this chick ain't

having that *

* say goodbye

* i'd rather be a whore

than a motherfucking bore *

* you best believe it

* i hate semen

>> * i've been looking for

a date like you *

>> * so big, so hard, so strong,

so long *

>> * and you can't wait to see

what i've been through *

>> * from his back, from his

side, on top, to the side *

* what's up?

>> * i've been looking for

a date like you *

>> * me on top, you on top

* let's go

>> * and you can't wait to see

what i can do to you, to you *

>> * one, two, three, four

* i'll show you yours

if you show me mine *

* but i don't cuddle

* i don't spoon

* and i sure as hell don't cry

* if you don't know the meaning

of one and done *

* then you must not fuck

enough *

>> * i've been looking for

a date like you *

>> * so big, so hard, so strong,

so long *

>> * and you can't wait to see

what i've been through *

>> * from his back, from his

side, on top, to the side *

* what's up?

>> * i've been looking for

a date like you *

>> * me on top, you on top

* let's go

>> * and you can't wait to see

what i can do to you, to you *

>> * one, two, three, four

>> * i've been looking for

a date like you *

>> * so big, so hard, so strong,

so long *

>> * and you can't wait to see

what i've been through *