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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:00:42,650 --> 00:00:44,150
Ohh,
you're so good.
3
00:00:44,650 --> 00:00:48,150
Ohh, yes.
I am the best, baby.
4
00:00:48,660 --> 00:00:50,150
- Oh, yeah !
- Oh. Oh, that was a tit.
5
00:00:50,660 --> 00:00:52,160
- That is a tit ! Yes !
6
00:00:52,660 --> 00:00:54,160
Oh, you're so big !
7
00:00:55,660 --> 00:00:57,160
Oh, yeah. Yeah,
that's right, baby.
8
00:00:57,610 --> 00:01:00,160
- Oh, doggie
wants to hide his bone. - Yes !
9
00:01:00,620 --> 00:01:02,160
Oh, yeah !
I'm bone smuggling, baby.
10
00:01:02,620 --> 00:01:04,160
- Man, would you shut up !
11
00:01:04,620 --> 00:01:06,160
Hey, Jimmy.
Just wanted to say sweet dreams.
12
00:01:07,620 --> 00:01:08,160
Yeah, yeah.
Sweet dreams. Good night, Mom.
13
00:01:09,620 --> 00:01:12,160
- Kiss good night.
14
00:01:12,620 --> 00:01:15,160
- Something wrong
with the reception ? - Uh, yeah. Yeah.
15
00:01:15,620 --> 00:01:18,120
- There's-- There's this nature
show that I'm trying to watch. - Take it off.
16
00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:22,120
- And the birds are
all scrambled and I can't even-- - Do me ! Yes !
17
00:01:22,620 --> 00:01:25,120
- Baby ! Ride me like a pony !
18
00:01:25,620 --> 00:01:28,120
- The thing must be broken or I
sat on the remote or something.
19
00:01:28,620 --> 00:01:31,120
- Getting ready for bed, son ?
- Yup, I'm all set, Dad. I'm all set.
20
00:01:31,620 --> 00:01:34,120
- Yeah ?
- No ! No, I think he's tried to watch some illegal channels.
21
00:01:34,620 --> 00:01:37,120
- Illegal-- Illegal channels ?
- This is just bad reception, honey.
22
00:01:37,580 --> 00:01:39,120
-Oh, spank my hairy ass !
-What's that ?
23
00:01:39,580 --> 00:01:43,120
- Ooh, baby !
- You know what ? Here. Just give me this, please--
24
00:01:43,580 --> 00:01:46,120
- Oh, my God !
- And let's get this-- Ohh !
25
00:01:46,580 --> 00:01:50,120
Okay, okay. Let's, uh-- What the hell's
the matter with this thing ?
26
00:01:50,580 --> 00:01:51,120
Yes !
27
00:02:02,580 --> 00:02:05,090
Illegal channels ?
Shit !
28
00:02:05,580 --> 00:02:07,080
If there's any channel that
should be illegal, it's that "all-woman's" channel.
29
00:02:08,590 --> 00:02:11,090
- Lifetime supply
of pantyhose or some shit. - Yeah.
30
00:02:11,590 --> 00:02:14,090
Hey, uh, did you see The Little Mermaid
on TV the other night ?
31
00:02:14,590 --> 00:02:17,090
- No.
- Ariel, man. She's so hot !
32
00:02:17,590 --> 00:02:21,090
- Yeah, Oz. But not when she's on land.
- She's a mermaid, dude.
33
00:02:21,550 --> 00:02:25,090
Come on, Vicky, it's Stifler's
party. We got to go. It'll be great.
34
00:02:25,550 --> 00:02:29,090
Why ? All that
happens at Stifler's parties is people get drunk and do it.
35
00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:31,090
Yeah.
36
00:02:31,550 --> 00:02:33,090
Now, come on, Kevin.
Open it.
37
00:02:33,550 --> 00:02:36,090
It's a big, thick envelope, Vicky.
You got in.
38
00:02:36,550 --> 00:02:38,090
If you think so,
just open it.
39
00:02:38,550 --> 00:02:40,050
- Fine.
40
00:02:45,550 --> 00:02:47,050
Hmm.
41
00:02:47,550 --> 00:02:51,050
"Dear Miss Latham: We're sorry but
after keeping you on the waiting list...
42
00:02:51,550 --> 00:02:55,050
for the past couple of months, we've
decided that you are now rejected."
43
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:57,050
- Shut up !
44
00:02:57,550 --> 00:03:02,050
- You got in.
- Yes ! I love you !
45
00:03:02,510 --> 00:03:04,050
Okay.
46
00:03:11,510 --> 00:03:13,050
Hey, you think I should wear
this shirt to Stifler's party ?
47
00:03:13,510 --> 00:03:16,060
You've worn that shirt for,
like, three days in a row, man !
48
00:03:16,510 --> 00:03:18,060
Guys.
She said it.
49
00:03:18,510 --> 00:03:20,060
- Said what ?
- She said she loves me.
50
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,020
- Holy shit, dude ! The "L" word ?
- Oh, man !
51
00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:25,020
Cornell's not
that far from "U" of "M."
52
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,020
Yeah, it's only,
like, seven hours.
53
00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:29,020
Oh, and you get
to drive across Canada.
54
00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:34,020
- Beautiful country.
- Whatever. It's doable.
55
00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:37,020
Wh-What we should
do today, in band.
56
00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:41,020
Instead of playing
our instruments regularly, we should play them backwards.
57
00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:43,020
- That'll be so funny !
- Yeah.
58
00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:52,020
No offense, but you're talking
about a post-high school, long-distance relationship.
59
00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:54,020
And you and Kevin
haven't even done it yet.
60
00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:56,020
That's not why
we're going out.
61
00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:59,020
What do you expect him to drive
to Cornell for ? Milk and cookies ?
62
00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:02,020
We're gonna have sex
when he's ready and I'm ready.
63
00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:03,980
It's got to be
completely perfect.
64
00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:06,980
I want the right time, the right moment,
the right place--
65
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,980
Vicky, it's not
a space shuttle launch. It's sex.
66
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:15,980
- Finch.
- Here's the man we are looking for.
67
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:17,980
- Gentlemen.
- What's going on, buddy ?
68
00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:21,980
- Same ol'--
Finch. You got the Latin homework ?
69
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:27,990
Oh.
70
00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:29,990
It means, "My dog ate it."
It's Latin. It's a joke.
71
00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:34,990
- It's a Latin joke.
- Yeah, Latin. Just drink your coffee.
72
00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:36,990
- No, Jim, it's mochaccino.
- What ?
73
00:04:37,450 --> 00:04:38,990
What I'm drinking, it's mochaccino.
It's not coffee.
74
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:41,990
'Nova !
75
00:04:42,450 --> 00:04:43,950
- What's up, dude ?
76
00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:45,950
You coming to the party
tonight, Ozzie, you fuckface ?
77
00:04:46,450 --> 00:04:47,950
Uh, depends if my date
wants to stop by.
78
00:04:48,450 --> 00:04:51,950
- I'm working on something new.
- I got an idea about something new.
79
00:04:52,450 --> 00:04:53,950
How about you guys
actually locate your dicks,
80
00:04:54,450 --> 00:04:56,950
remove the shrink-wrap
and fucking use them !
81
00:04:57,450 --> 00:05:00,950
Dude, it's gonna happen.
She's a college chick.
82
00:05:01,450 --> 00:05:02,950
Oh, right.
I'll see you guys tonight.
83
00:05:03,450 --> 00:05:06,950
I'll look for you in the no-fucking
section.
84
00:05:10,410 --> 00:05:13,950
All right. I'm shooting for a
9:00 E.T.A. Beer in hand by five after.
85
00:05:14,410 --> 00:05:16,950
Breath check.
86
00:05:18,410 --> 00:05:21,950
- Thank you.
87
00:05:28,410 --> 00:05:30,910
- I wish you wouldn't do that.
- So, you got something up your sleeve for tonight ?
88
00:05:31,410 --> 00:05:33,910
This is a foolproof plan,
my friend.
89
00:05:34,410 --> 00:05:35,910
I have a serious question
to ask you guys. Okay.
90
00:05:36,410 --> 00:05:39,910
You know Nadia the Czechoslovakian
chick ? She might be there tonight.
91
00:05:40,410 --> 00:05:41,910
Now, do you think she would prefer...
92
00:05:44,420 --> 00:05:45,920
Laid-back Jim...
93
00:05:46,410 --> 00:05:47,920
or...
94
00:05:48,370 --> 00:05:50,920
cool, hip Jim ?
95
00:05:51,370 --> 00:05:52,920
I don't think it really matters
with that shirt you're wearing.
96
00:05:53,370 --> 00:05:56,920
What ? Correct me if I'm wrong but
you're the one with the girlfriend...
97
00:05:57,380 --> 00:05:58,920
and you're still
stranded on third base.
98
00:05:59,380 --> 00:06:01,920
Hey, at least I know what
third base feels like, okay ?
99
00:06:02,380 --> 00:06:03,920
- You're still just a batboy.
- Batboy. Batboy.
100
00:06:04,380 --> 00:06:05,920
- What are you talking about ?
101
00:06:06,380 --> 00:06:08,880
Guys, uh--
102
00:06:09,380 --> 00:06:11,880
What exactly does
third base feel like ?
103
00:06:12,380 --> 00:06:13,880
You wanna
take this one ?
104
00:06:16,380 --> 00:06:19,880
- Like warm apple pie.
- Yeah ? - Yeah.
105
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,880
- Apple pie, huh ?
- Uh-huh.
106
00:06:23,380 --> 00:06:25,880
- McDonald's or homemade ?
107
00:06:26,380 --> 00:06:29,880
Gentlemen,
destiny awaits.
108
00:06:33,340 --> 00:06:34,880
- -** It's been one week since you looked at me -**
109
00:06:35,340 --> 00:06:36,880
-** Cocked your head to the side
and said, I'm angry -**
110
00:06:37,340 --> 00:06:38,880
That's number five and six
for the Stif-meister !
111
00:06:40,340 --> 00:06:41,880
- Yeah.
112
00:06:42,340 --> 00:06:43,880
- Oops !
113
00:06:44,340 --> 00:06:46,880
- Holy !
- H-Hey !
114
00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:50,840
Nadia ! Buenos dias.
Glad you could make it.
115
00:06:51,340 --> 00:06:53,840
- I'll be back for you later.
116
00:07:00,340 --> 00:07:01,840
- Another party sultan !
- How ya doing ?
117
00:07:02,350 --> 00:07:03,850
Welcome to Stifler's
Palace of Love, fellas.
118
00:07:04,340 --> 00:07:07,850
- The keg's back there ! Enjoy !
- Yeah.
119
00:07:08,350 --> 00:07:10,850
Vicky, Jessica ! Great to see you.
Glad you could make it.
120
00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:12,850
Haha, bitches !
121
00:07:13,310 --> 00:07:14,850
- Sherman !
- Hey !
122
00:07:16,310 --> 00:07:17,850
What the fuck
are you doing here ?
123
00:07:22,310 --> 00:07:22,850
Fellas !
What's going on ?
124
00:07:23,310 --> 00:07:23,850
Fellas !
What's going on ?
125
00:07:24,310 --> 00:07:27,850
Sherman. Not much. Just, uh,
scoping the babes.
126
00:07:28,310 --> 00:07:30,810
- Indeed ! Some fine ladies here, boys.
- Uh-huh.
127
00:07:31,310 --> 00:07:34,810
Confidence is high.
Repeat. Confidence is high.
128
00:07:35,310 --> 00:07:36,810
Sherman is moving
to DEFCON 2.
129
00:07:38,310 --> 00:07:40,810
- Full strategic arsenal
ready for deployment. - Hey !
130
00:07:41,310 --> 00:07:42,810
You have something
going tonight, Sherman ?
131
00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:44,810
You see that
Central chick, Bernette ?
132
00:07:45,310 --> 00:07:46,810
- Um, no.
- No.
133
00:07:47,310 --> 00:07:49,810
She's around.
Seems she's taken a liking to me.
134
00:07:52,270 --> 00:07:54,810
Fellas, it's time
she experienced... the Shermanator.
135
00:07:55,270 --> 00:07:57,810
Yeah, okay,
Sherman. Whatever.
136
00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:01,810
I'm a sophisticated sex robot
sent back through time...
137
00:08:02,270 --> 00:08:04,810
to change the future
for one lucky lady.
138
00:08:05,270 --> 00:08:08,820
- Go get 'em, tiger.
- I'll be back !
139
00:08:11,270 --> 00:08:12,770
- Hopeless.
- Completely.
140
00:08:13,270 --> 00:08:14,770
- Hi.
- Hey, Vic.
141
00:08:15,270 --> 00:08:17,780
Oh, shit.
Guys-- Guys--
142
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:21,780
There's Nadia and
she just looked at me.
143
00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:23,780
- She just looked at me.
- Well, why don't you go talk to her ?
144
00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:27,780
Yeah.
145
00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:30,780
Yeah, you're right, Kev.
I should just go talk to her.
146
00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:34,780
Yeah,
I could do that. Sure.
147
00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:38,780
Sure.
148
00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:42,780
Kev ? Kev ? Ke--
149
00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,740
Yeah. Yeah.
150
00:08:55,240 --> 00:09:00,740
-** At last -**
151
00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:05,740
-** My love -**
152
00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:08,740
-** Has come along -**
153
00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:14,740
-** My lonely days -**
154
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:19,740
- -** Are over -**
- That's great !
155
00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:23,740
-** And life
is like a song -**
156
00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:29,750
-** Oh, yeah, yeah -**
157
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:31,750
-** At last -**
158
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,710
See ya later.
159
00:09:36,210 --> 00:09:37,710
-** The stars above -**-**
160
00:09:44,210 --> 00:09:46,710
- We're here for the party.
161
00:09:47,210 --> 00:09:49,710
What party ?
There's no party.
162
00:09:54,210 --> 00:09:58,710
Weird.
Try the house down the street.
163
00:10:02,170 --> 00:10:04,710
So, what's your major ?
164
00:10:06,170 --> 00:10:07,710
Post-modern feminist thought.
165
00:10:08,170 --> 00:10:10,710
Oh, cool.
Great night, isn't it ?
166
00:10:11,170 --> 00:10:13,710
Sure.
167
00:10:14,170 --> 00:10:19,670
Yeah, it's just something about the
springtime that's just cool, you know ?
168
00:10:20,170 --> 00:10:23,670
- Like the smell
of fresh rain or something. - Mmm.
169
00:10:24,170 --> 00:10:26,670
Suck me, beautiful.
170
00:10:27,170 --> 00:10:28,670
What did you just say ?
171
00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:32,670
- Suck me, beautiful.
172
00:10:33,170 --> 00:10:37,670
My friends call me "'Nova,"
as in Casanova.
173
00:10:38,170 --> 00:10:40,680
That's pathetic.
174
00:10:42,130 --> 00:10:43,680
Jeez, you don't
have to laugh at me.
175
00:10:44,130 --> 00:10:45,680
Well, there's just some things
you need to learn, that's all.
176
00:10:46,130 --> 00:10:48,680
- Like what ?
- Well, you've got to tone it down.
177
00:10:49,140 --> 00:10:50,680
You don't need to come
to a place like Lookout Point...
178
00:10:51,140 --> 00:10:53,680
and spout off
cheeseball lines to be romantic.
179
00:10:54,140 --> 00:10:56,680
- Okay.
- You have to pay attention to a girl.
180
00:10:57,140 --> 00:11:01,640
Be sensitive to her feelings.
Relationships are reciprocal.
181
00:11:02,140 --> 00:11:05,640
Come on, Casanova.
I'll take you back to your friends.
182
00:11:11,140 --> 00:11:14,640
Vicky, think it's time to take
the next step in our relationship ?
183
00:11:15,140 --> 00:11:18,640
- Tonight ?
- Yeah, it's such a perfect evening.
184
00:11:19,140 --> 00:11:21,640
I mean, it's how you've
always pictured it, isn't it ?
185
00:11:22,100 --> 00:11:23,640
Damn, my parts fucking stink !
186
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:27,640
Dude, you gotta take
a shit ! You smell like a Yeti !
187
00:11:28,100 --> 00:11:30,640
Or not.
188
00:11:31,100 --> 00:11:33,640
Just relax.
189
00:11:37,100 --> 00:11:39,640
You actually
said that ?
190
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:42,600
- Shut up !
191
00:11:43,100 --> 00:11:44,600
You did a hell of a lot better
than I did with Nadia.
192
00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:47,600
Oh, thanks, Jim, that's great.
That's really reassuring.
193
00:11:48,100 --> 00:11:50,600
Hey, no problem,
'Nova.
194
00:11:51,100 --> 00:11:54,600
Hey, don't call me 'Nova anymore.
I'm a-- I'm a fraud.
195
00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:56,600
You guys
are pathetic.
196
00:11:57,100 --> 00:11:59,610
I'm gonna find myself
a little hottie.
197
00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:03,610
"Suck me, beautiful" !
198
00:12:09,070 --> 00:12:10,610
- Let me know.
- Okay.
199
00:12:12,070 --> 00:12:13,610
Keep going.
200
00:12:14,070 --> 00:12:15,610
I should be able
to talk to girls.
201
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:18,610
I'm articulate.
202
00:12:19,070 --> 00:12:20,610
You know, I got a 720
on my S.A.T. verbal.
203
00:12:21,070 --> 00:12:23,570
Bullshit.
There's no way.
204
00:12:24,070 --> 00:12:27,570
I kid you not, man.
Look. Listen.
205
00:12:28,070 --> 00:12:31,570
- Copious. Verisimilitude.
- Mmm.
206
00:12:32,070 --> 00:12:34,570
Oh, ohh. Now.
207
00:12:37,070 --> 00:12:38,570
Ohh.
208
00:12:45,030 --> 00:12:46,570
Suck me,
beautiful !
209
00:12:47,030 --> 00:12:49,570
- Damn it, Stifler.
- Checkout time !
210
00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:55,570
- Please, vacate the room.
- You are such a jerk.
211
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:02,570
God, I can't believe how many
cool people are at this party.
212
00:13:03,030 --> 00:13:06,530
Yup.
213
00:13:07,030 --> 00:13:08,530
And you got
a keg too !
214
00:13:09,030 --> 00:13:11,530
- Wow !
- Indeed.
215
00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:19,540
Oh, wait.
I left my beer downstairs.
216
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:22,540
No. No.
Here, babe !
217
00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:25,540
Thanks.
218
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:28,540
You're really
beautiful. Oh--
219
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,540
- Really ?
- Oh, yeah.
220
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:49,500
You know what ? I don't know
if I want to be doing this.
221
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:54,500
- Doing what ?
- You know, like, if we hook up tonight,
222
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,500
tomorrow I'll just be some girl
you go telling all your friends about.
223
00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:00,500
No way !
224
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,500
Steve, you could at least look at me
when you say that !
225
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:08,500
Look. Sarah,
226
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:12,500
I-- I wouldn't go telling
stories or anything about you.
227
00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:17,500
I promise.
So, just... relax,
228
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:21,510
take it slow... and
let the good times roll.
229
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:27,460
- Okay.
- All right.
230
00:14:32,970 --> 00:14:35,470
What's wrong ?
231
00:14:37,970 --> 00:14:40,470
What's wrong ?
What is it ?
232
00:14:42,970 --> 00:14:47,470
- Xenophobic.
233
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:51,470
Oh !
234
00:14:51,930 --> 00:14:54,470
- Regurgitation.
- I know that one.
235
00:14:55,930 --> 00:14:59,470
- Kevin likes it.
- He likes getting head.
236
00:14:59,930 --> 00:15:01,470
Gee, what a total shocker.
What about you, Vicky ?
237
00:15:01,930 --> 00:15:04,470
I mean, h-have you just
never had one with Kevin...
238
00:15:04,930 --> 00:15:06,470
or have you never
had one, period ?
239
00:15:06,930 --> 00:15:08,430
I've had one.
240
00:15:08,930 --> 00:15:10,430
- I think.
- Okay.
241
00:15:10,930 --> 00:15:14,430
That's a no. No wonder
you're not psyched about sex.
242
00:15:14,930 --> 00:15:16,430
You tell me you never
even had one manually ?
243
00:15:16,930 --> 00:15:20,430
- I've never tried it.
- You've never double-clicked your mouse ?
244
00:15:21,930 --> 00:15:23,430
- Ha-ha, nice !
245
00:15:23,930 --> 00:15:26,430
- Jesus ! Stifler, how much did you drink, man ?
246
00:15:26,930 --> 00:15:30,430
Hey, Stifler ?
How's the pale ale ?
247
00:15:30,890 --> 00:15:33,430
- Fuck you !
- Ooh, whoo !
248
00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:38,440
- That's Stifler's mom ?
- Yup.
249
00:15:38,890 --> 00:15:43,440
Shit. I cannot believe a fine woman
like this produced a guy like Stifler.
250
00:15:43,890 --> 00:15:47,440
- Dude, that chick's a "MILF."
- What the hell is that ?
251
00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:51,400
- M-I-L-F-- Mom I'd like to fuck.
- Yeah, dude !
252
00:15:51,900 --> 00:15:53,400
Oh-ho, yeah !
253
00:15:53,900 --> 00:15:56,400
- Yeah ! MILF ! MILF !
- Hey, guys-- Guys. Guys.
254
00:15:56,900 --> 00:16:00,400
- Come here.
- Sherman, what's going on ?
255
00:16:00,900 --> 00:16:04,400
Yeah, uh-- Don't you think you fellas
could try a little tact ?
256
00:16:04,900 --> 00:16:09,400
I got company,
if you know what I mean ?
257
00:16:11,860 --> 00:16:13,400
She's hot !
258
00:16:15,860 --> 00:16:21,400
If Sherman has sex before I do,
I'm gonna be really pissed.
259
00:16:21,860 --> 00:16:26,400
Sherman ?
The Shermanator ?
260
00:16:26,860 --> 00:16:29,400
- Come on, man.
261
00:16:31,860 --> 00:16:33,360
MILF ! MILF !
262
00:16:33,860 --> 00:16:37,360
MILF ! MILF ! Dude, hey, dude.
What are you doing to her, dude ?
263
00:16:37,860 --> 00:16:41,360
Oh, my God,
bro, dude.
264
00:16:41,860 --> 00:16:44,360
- Enough of this blow job bullshit.
265
00:16:44,860 --> 00:16:48,360
- I gotta get laid already.
- That's nice. Really, really nice.
266
00:16:48,860 --> 00:16:51,360
- Can I have a ride ?
- Sure.
267
00:16:52,860 --> 00:16:55,370
- Vicky, wait.
- Not for you.
268
00:16:55,820 --> 00:16:59,370
Yeti !
I am the Yeti !
269
00:17:07,830 --> 00:17:10,370
- Good morning, gentlemen.
- Finch.
270
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:14,330
Where were you last night, huh ?
What happened to that foolproof plan of yours ?
271
00:17:14,830 --> 00:17:17,330
Well, I was going for a fashionably-late
entrance and I was too late.
272
00:17:17,830 --> 00:17:20,330
So,
no ladies left.
273
00:17:20,830 --> 00:17:23,330
It was a very
special night, very special.
274
00:17:23,830 --> 00:17:25,330
- Guys. Guys.
275
00:17:28,830 --> 00:17:32,330
- I'll never forget this.
- Oh, I'll never forget it, either.
276
00:17:32,830 --> 00:17:36,330
- Thank you.
- Uhh.
277
00:17:36,790 --> 00:17:40,330
- Well, bye.
- Bye.
278
00:17:40,790 --> 00:17:42,330
Bye.
279
00:17:45,790 --> 00:17:48,330
Fellas, say good-bye
to Chuck Sherman, the boy.
280
00:17:48,790 --> 00:17:51,330
I... am now a man.
281
00:17:51,790 --> 00:17:54,330
I highly recommend
you join the club.
282
00:17:54,790 --> 00:17:59,290
We were doing the wild thing...
all night. I'm exhausted.
283
00:17:59,790 --> 00:18:02,290
I don't get it. I mean,
how the hell did you do that ?
284
00:18:02,790 --> 00:18:07,290
It was just my time.
It was just my time.
285
00:18:08,790 --> 00:18:11,300
Best of luck
to you boys.
286
00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:16,300
- I cannot believe this.
- Come on, guys.
287
00:18:16,750 --> 00:18:19,300
You know, we should
be happy for Sherman.
288
00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:23,300
No, we shouldn't be.
289
00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:26,300
You know, I put in months
of quality time with Vicky.
290
00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,300
Sherman meets a chick
for one night and scores.
291
00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:31,300
- This is just wrong.
- No shit.
292
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:35,300
How the hell am I supposed
to become Mr. Sensitive Man ?
293
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:38,260
You know, we're all gonna go to college
as virgins. You realize this, right ?
294
00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:41,260
I mean, they probably have special dorms
for people like us.
295
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:46,260
All right. I got an idea.
But it's got to stay between us.
296
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:48,260
It's really simple. We just
got to make an agreement.
297
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,260
Er, nah. It's--
It's more than an agreement.
298
00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:53,260
- What ? A bet ?
- A pact.
299
00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:55,260
No money involved.
More important than any bet.
300
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:59,260
Here's the deal.
We all get laid before we graduate.
301
00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:04,260
Dude, it's not like I haven't
been trying to get laid.
302
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:07,260
Think about when you work out, Oz.
You gotta have someone there, right ?
303
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:09,260
Someone to spot you.
Someone to keep you motivated.
304
00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:12,260
Well, that's exactly what
we can do for each other.
305
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:15,270
I mean, we'll be there
to keep each other on track.
306
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:17,260
Separately, we are flawed
and vulnerable, but together,
307
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,220
we are the masters
of our sexual destiny.
308
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:21,220
Their tiger-style
kung fu is strong.
309
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:23,220
But our dragon-style
will defeat it.
310
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:27,230
- Guys !
- The Shaolin masters from East and West must unite !
311
00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,230
- Fight, and find out who is number one.
- Guys !
312
00:19:30,730 --> 00:19:34,230
Come on. You're ruining my moment here.
This is our very manhood at stake.
313
00:19:34,730 --> 00:19:37,230
We must make
a stand, here and now.
314
00:19:38,730 --> 00:19:42,230
No longer will our penises
remain flaccid and unused !
315
00:19:42,690 --> 00:19:46,230
We will fight for every man out there
who isn't getting laid and should be.
316
00:19:46,690 --> 00:19:49,230
This is our day.
This is our time.
317
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:54,230
And, by God, we will not stand by and
watch history condemn us into celibacy.
318
00:19:54,690 --> 00:19:56,230
- Amen. Yes.
- I like that.
319
00:19:56,690 --> 00:20:00,190
-We will make a stand. We will succeed.
-'Bout time !
320
00:20:00,690 --> 00:20:03,190
- We will get laid !
- Yeah ! - Yeah !
321
00:20:04,690 --> 00:20:08,190
Now, the sex: It's got
to be valid, consensual sex.
322
00:20:08,690 --> 00:20:12,190
- No prostitutes.
That's what you're thinking, Finch.
323
00:20:12,690 --> 00:20:14,190
Busted.
324
00:20:14,690 --> 00:20:17,190
So, basically,
prom is our last chance.
325
00:20:17,690 --> 00:20:19,190
- Oh, dude. Prom sucks.
- I know,
326
00:20:19,690 --> 00:20:21,190
but you gotta think
about it this way.
327
00:20:21,650 --> 00:20:25,190
I mean, all the parties afterwards ?
The chicks are going to want to do it.
328
00:20:25,650 --> 00:20:29,190
- Yeah-yeah, he's right. It's,
like tradition or something. - The Rose Bowl.
329
00:20:30,650 --> 00:20:34,200
- So, that gives us--
- Exactly three weeks to the day.
330
00:20:36,650 --> 00:20:39,200
- We're gonna do this.
- All right, to the next step ! - Next step !
331
00:20:39,650 --> 00:20:40,200
Next step !
332
00:20:40,650 --> 00:20:42,150
Next step !
333
00:20:42,660 --> 00:20:47,160
-** I have visions I was in them
I was looking into the mirror -**
334
00:20:47,660 --> 00:20:50,160
-** To see a little bit clearer -**
335
00:20:50,660 --> 00:20:52,160
-** The rottenness
and evil in me -**
336
00:20:55,660 --> 00:20:59,160
-** Fingertips have memories I can't
forget the curves of your body -**
337
00:20:59,660 --> 00:21:02,160
-** And when I feel
a bit naughty -**
338
00:21:02,660 --> 00:21:06,160
-** I run it up
the flagpole and see -**
339
00:21:06,620 --> 00:21:08,160
-** Who salutes
but no one ever does -**
340
00:21:08,620 --> 00:21:12,160
-** I'm not sick
but I'm not well -**
341
00:21:12,620 --> 00:21:14,160
-** I'm not sick
but I'm not well -**
342
00:21:14,620 --> 00:21:17,160
-** And I'm so hot -**
343
00:21:17,620 --> 00:21:21,160
-** 'Cause I'm in hell -**
344
00:21:21,620 --> 00:21:25,120
-** Been around the world and found
that only stupid people are breeding -**
345
00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:29,120
-** The cretins
cloning and feeding -**
346
00:21:29,620 --> 00:21:32,120
- Well, did you get the flowers ?
- -** And I don't even own a TV -**
347
00:21:34,620 --> 00:21:37,120
-** Hear the voices in my head
I swear to God -**
348
00:21:37,620 --> 00:21:40,120
-** It sounds like
they're snoring -**
349
00:21:40,620 --> 00:21:43,120
-** But if you're poor
and you're boring -**
350
00:21:43,620 --> 00:21:45,120
-** The agony and the irony -**
351
00:21:45,580 --> 00:21:49,120
-** They're killing me -**
Whoa !
352
00:21:49,580 --> 00:21:53,130
-** I'm not sick
but I'm not well -**
353
00:21:53,580 --> 00:21:56,130
-** And I'm so hot -**
354
00:21:57,580 --> 00:22:00,130
-** 'Cause I'm in hell -**-**
355
00:22:00,590 --> 00:22:03,130
Don't worry. You'll
get her back soon enough.
356
00:22:03,590 --> 00:22:05,090
- You think so ?
- Sure, she likes you.
357
00:22:05,590 --> 00:22:06,090
- Well, I like her too.
- Do you love her ?
358
00:22:06,590 --> 00:22:07,090
- Well, I like her too.
- Do you love her ?
359
00:22:07,590 --> 00:22:11,090
Um, you know what ?
You can't really ask me that.
360
00:22:11,590 --> 00:22:14,090
Well, if you want to get
her in the sack, I mean, just tell her you love her.
361
00:22:14,590 --> 00:22:17,090
- That's how I was duped.
- Look, Jessica,
362
00:22:17,590 --> 00:22:20,090
I-I don't want
to dupe her.
363
00:22:20,590 --> 00:22:23,090
All right.
What you need to do...
364
00:22:23,590 --> 00:22:25,090
is learn how to press
a girl's buttons.
365
00:22:26,550 --> 00:22:27,090
You have to give her
what she's never had.
366
00:22:28,550 --> 00:22:31,090
- What's that ?
- Let me give you a hint.
367
00:22:31,550 --> 00:22:35,090
Ohh, Kev ! Uhh. Yeah.
368
00:22:35,550 --> 00:22:38,090
- ? Comprende ?
- You mean an orgasm.
369
00:22:38,550 --> 00:22:41,090
- You got it, stud !
- Well, you know,
370
00:22:41,550 --> 00:22:43,090
I'm-I'm pretty sure that I've...
given her a--
371
00:22:43,550 --> 00:22:47,050
- No, you haven't.
- Well, there was one time--
372
00:22:47,550 --> 00:22:50,050
- No.
- Oh, man.
373
00:22:50,550 --> 00:22:55,050
- Look, kid, it's up to you.
The big "L" or the big "O." - Dickhead !
374
00:22:55,550 --> 00:22:59,050
- You gotta see this.
-** Do you believe in -**
375
00:22:59,550 --> 00:23:02,050
- -** Magic in a young girl's heart -**
- -** Ooh, ooh -**
376
00:23:02,550 --> 00:23:05,050
-** How the music can free her
whenever it starts -**
377
00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:09,060
-** And it's magic
if the music is groovy -**
378
00:23:09,510 --> 00:23:13,060
- -** It makes you feel happy -**
- What did you cocks do to him ?
379
00:23:13,520 --> 00:23:15,060
- -** I'll tell you about the magic
It'll free your soul -** - -** Ooh, ooh, ooh -**
380
00:23:16,510 --> 00:23:20,060
-** But it's like trying to tell
a stranger 'bout rock 'n' roll -**-**
381
00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:22,060
Great.
See you next time.
382
00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:30,020
- Hey, guys.
Came to watch me in action ? - Yeah.
383
00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:33,020
- I-I think you sounded pretty good.
- Yeah, man.
384
00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:35,020
I think you need
your balls reattached.
385
00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:38,020
- Hey, keep it down, dude.
- What the fuck are you doing here ?
386
00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:40,020
This place
is an untapped resource.
387
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,020
I mean,
check it out.
388
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:47,020
- These vocal jazz girls are hot.
- Why the hell is he joining jazz choir so late ?
389
00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:51,020
- Maybe he's preparing for
another senior year at East ?
390
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:55,020
You guys,
we don't even know him.
391
00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:59,020
You dipshit !
392
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,020
You're expecting
to score with some...
393
00:24:01,480 --> 00:24:03,020
goody-goody
choirgirl priss ?
394
00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:07,020
These chicks don't know me. I can work
the sensitive angle here, fellas !
395
00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:09,980
You know, it's just like
that college chick told me.
396
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:12,980
All that you gotta do
is just ask 'em questions...
397
00:24:13,480 --> 00:24:14,980
and listen to what
they have to say and shit.
398
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:18,980
I don't know, man.
That sounds like a lot of work !
399
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,990
- Uh, just a second !
400
00:24:29,490 --> 00:24:30,990
Come in. Come in.
401
00:24:32,450 --> 00:24:33,990
Oh, Jim, you're here.
402
00:24:34,450 --> 00:24:37,990
Uh, I was just walking
by your room and uh--
403
00:24:38,450 --> 00:24:41,990
And, you know, I was thinking, "Boy,
it's been a long time since we've had...
404
00:24:42,450 --> 00:24:43,990
a little
father-son, uh-uh, chat."
405
00:24:46,450 --> 00:24:49,990
Oh ! I almost forgot.
I, uh, I bought some magazines.
406
00:24:50,450 --> 00:24:52,950
Do you just want to flip
to the center section ?
407
00:24:55,450 --> 00:24:57,950
Well, this is the--
this is the, uh, female form.
408
00:24:58,450 --> 00:25:00,950
And they have
focused on the breasts,
409
00:25:01,450 --> 00:25:05,950
uh, which are used primarily
to, uh, feed young infants...
410
00:25:06,450 --> 00:25:09,950
- and, uh-- and also, uh, in foreplay.
- Right.
411
00:25:10,450 --> 00:25:13,950
This is, uh--
This is Hustler.
412
00:25:14,410 --> 00:25:17,950
And this is a much
more exotic magazine.
413
00:25:18,410 --> 00:25:21,950
Now, they have decided to focus
on the, uh, pubic region--
414
00:25:23,410 --> 00:25:25,950
- Right. Uh-huh.
- The whole groin area.
415
00:25:26,410 --> 00:25:29,950
Look at the expression on her face.
You see that ? See what's she's doing ?
416
00:25:30,410 --> 00:25:32,910
She's kind of looking
right into your eyes saying,
417
00:25:33,410 --> 00:25:36,910
"Hey, big boy.
Hey, how ya doing ?"
418
00:25:37,420 --> 00:25:40,920
- You see ?
- Right.
419
00:25:41,420 --> 00:25:44,920
Shaved is a magazine
I'm not too familiar with,
420
00:25:45,420 --> 00:25:49,920
- but, again,
if you flip to the center...
421
00:25:50,420 --> 00:25:51,920
section--
422
00:25:52,420 --> 00:25:56,920
Well, you see the detail that, uh,
that they go into in this picture here.
423
00:25:57,380 --> 00:25:59,920
- Uh-huh. Yeah.
- It almost looks like a tropical plant or something...
424
00:26:00,380 --> 00:26:01,920
- underwater... thing.
- Yeah. Yes.
425
00:26:02,380 --> 00:26:04,920
- Do you know what a clitoris is ?
- Oh, my God.
426
00:26:05,380 --> 00:26:06,920
- Well, don't say, "Oh--"
- Yes, I know what a clitoris is.
427
00:26:07,380 --> 00:26:08,920
Oh, you do. Oh, I see. Yes, you do.
I forgot you've been there and back.
428
00:26:09,380 --> 00:26:10,920
- You know everything--
- I've learned about it in Sex Ed--
429
00:26:11,380 --> 00:26:13,920
- I really don't need you
to talk about clitoris. - I'm trying to make this painless--
430
00:26:14,380 --> 00:26:16,880
- You know what ?
I'm sorry. Okay ? I'm sorry. - No-no-no.
431
00:26:17,380 --> 00:26:19,880
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.
432
00:26:20,380 --> 00:26:21,880
I shouldn't
have got hot there.
433
00:26:23,380 --> 00:26:24,880
Well, you know what
I'm going to do, Jim.
434
00:26:25,380 --> 00:26:26,880
I'm going to just
leave these books here...
435
00:26:27,380 --> 00:26:29,880
for you to, uh, peruse at your, uh--
at your leisure.
436
00:26:31,380 --> 00:26:33,880
Wait !
437
00:26:38,340 --> 00:26:39,880
Well, safer
than a tube sock.
438
00:26:42,340 --> 00:26:45,890
- Okay, that-- That was good.
- Yeah.
439
00:26:48,340 --> 00:26:51,890
- See you at dinner.
- Uh, yeah. I'll see you at dinner.
440
00:26:52,340 --> 00:26:54,890
So, Finch,
this is your plan ?
441
00:26:55,350 --> 00:26:57,850
You know, I don't think girls are
into the whole mini-golf thing.
442
00:26:58,350 --> 00:26:59,850
Kevin, I'm sure
that they're not.
443
00:27:00,350 --> 00:27:03,850
Actually, there is one small matter that
I need to ask for your cooperation in.
444
00:27:04,350 --> 00:27:06,850
- In the spirit of this
whole pact, you know ? - Sure, what do you need ?
445
00:27:07,350 --> 00:27:09,850
Whatever you hear about me, you agree.
And tell all the boys the same thing.
446
00:27:10,350 --> 00:27:13,850
Look, I gotta go.
Sixteen minutes round-trip.
447
00:27:14,350 --> 00:27:16,850
You know, Finch,
it's-- it's senior year.
448
00:27:17,350 --> 00:27:19,850
I mean, don't you think it's time you
learned how to take a dump at school ?
449
00:27:20,310 --> 00:27:22,850
When was the last time you looked
at the facilities in this school ?
450
00:27:29,310 --> 00:27:31,850
- Excuse me.
451
00:27:32,310 --> 00:27:34,850
Uh, that's
Paul Finch, right ?
452
00:27:35,310 --> 00:27:37,810
- Yeah.
- Well, you've seen him in the locker room, right ?
453
00:27:38,310 --> 00:27:42,810
- Uh, yeah.
- So, my friends, they want to know. Is it true ?
454
00:27:43,310 --> 00:27:45,810
You know,
that he's... equipped.
455
00:27:46,310 --> 00:27:49,810
I have no idea. Finch showers
with his bathing suit on.
456
00:27:50,310 --> 00:27:51,810
I mean, uh--
457
00:27:52,310 --> 00:27:55,810
As a matter of fact, it is true.
The guy's huge !
458
00:27:56,310 --> 00:27:58,810
- Does he have a date for the prom yet ?
- No, definitely not.
459
00:27:59,310 --> 00:28:00,810
All right. Thanks.
460
00:28:02,270 --> 00:28:04,820
Oh, man !
461
00:28:05,270 --> 00:28:09,820
So I was thinking maybe you could
give me some advice, brother to brother.
462
00:28:10,270 --> 00:28:12,820
I thought you might know a trick
or something to make her--
463
00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:16,820
- Orgasm ?
- Yeah. - What's good here ?
464
00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:19,780
- Try the spicy tuna hand roll.
- What ?
465
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,780
- How do you do that ?
- Hey, never mind that. Listen, pay attention.
466
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:26,780
Is that all that you're interested in,
trying to get your girl into bed ?
467
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,780
No, it'd be good to be able
to, you know, return the favor.
468
00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:32,780
Be nice to know she enjoys
things as much as I do.
469
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:35,780
See that ? That's good. That's what
I wanted to hear. Now, you qualify.
470
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,780
- Qualify for what ?
- My man, you've just inherited the Bible.
471
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:44,780
It originally started
as a sex manual,
472
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:47,780
this book that some guys
brought back from Amsterdam.
473
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:50,780
And each year it got passed on to one
East student who was worthy.
474
00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:54,780
Now, it's full of all sorts of stuff
that guys have added over the years.
475
00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:02,740
But you have to keep it a secret
and return it at the end of the year.
476
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:06,740
All right.
So now you know. Good luck.
477
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:15,740
- -** If you believe in magic -**
- -** Ooh, magic -**
478
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:20,750
-** Don't you bother to choose if it's
jug band music or rhythm and blues -**
479
00:29:21,250 --> 00:29:23,750
-** Just go and listen
It will start with a smile -**
480
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:27,750
-** That won't wipe off your face
no matter how hard you try -**
481
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:33,750
-** Your feet start tapping and you can't
seem to find how you got there -**
482
00:29:34,210 --> 00:29:36,750
-** Do you believe in magic -**-**
483
00:29:37,210 --> 00:29:41,750
-** Scooby-dooby doo bah scoo-scooby-dooby
dooby-dooby doo bah -**
484
00:29:42,210 --> 00:29:43,710
-** Yeah, magic -**-**
485
00:29:44,210 --> 00:29:46,710
What was that ?
486
00:29:47,210 --> 00:29:48,710
- Uh, sorry.
- No, it was good.
487
00:29:52,210 --> 00:29:54,710
Well, it, uh--
It came from the heart.
488
00:29:55,210 --> 00:29:58,710
Well, keep it coming.
All right, people, good work !
489
00:29:59,210 --> 00:30:01,710
Now, don't forget. The state
competition's a couple of weeks away,
490
00:30:02,210 --> 00:30:04,710
so keep on it, okay ?
491
00:30:15,170 --> 00:30:17,710
Not bad, Chris.
492
00:30:18,170 --> 00:30:19,710
Really ?
493
00:30:21,170 --> 00:30:22,710
Thanks, uh,
Heather, right ?
494
00:30:23,170 --> 00:30:24,670
Yeah.
495
00:30:25,170 --> 00:30:27,670
So, you've got this sort of
Frank Sinatra thing going on.
496
00:30:28,170 --> 00:30:32,670
Right. I feel like I've
discovered this whole new side of me.
497
00:30:33,170 --> 00:30:34,680
I mean, uh,
music is so expressive.
498
00:30:35,180 --> 00:30:38,680
Okay.
I mean, I agree, but...
499
00:30:39,180 --> 00:30:41,680
aren't you supposed to be out,
like, trying to decapitate someone...
500
00:30:42,180 --> 00:30:45,680
-with your lacrosse stick or something ?
-Oh, sure. Sure.
501
00:30:46,130 --> 00:30:47,680
You know, I know what
people think. It's like,
502
00:30:48,140 --> 00:30:50,680
"Oz, he's just this
kick-ass lacrosse player."
503
00:30:52,140 --> 00:30:53,680
You know, I also play football,
by the way, but that's, like,
504
00:30:54,140 --> 00:30:57,680
- that's not all that I am, you know ?
- Of course, I didn't--
505
00:30:58,140 --> 00:31:01,680
I mean, it really bothers me when
people try to pigeonhole me like that.
506
00:31:02,140 --> 00:31:03,680
You ?
507
00:31:04,140 --> 00:31:06,640
You think
I don't get that ?
508
00:31:07,140 --> 00:31:09,640
God, it's like just because I don't
get drunk and barf every weekend...
509
00:31:10,140 --> 00:31:13,640
that people say, "Oh, look. There's
this Goody Two-Shoes choirgirl priss."
510
00:31:15,140 --> 00:31:18,640
Yeah. So, like,
what else do you do ?
511
00:31:19,140 --> 00:31:21,640
Well,
the same things you do,
512
00:31:22,140 --> 00:31:24,640
Like hang out
with friends and stuff.
513
00:31:25,140 --> 00:31:27,640
- Why ? What do you think I do ?
- Oh, I--
514
00:31:28,100 --> 00:31:30,640
I just realized that I don't
know anything about you.
515
00:31:31,100 --> 00:31:35,640
- I was interested.
- Oh, well, what do you want to know ?
516
00:31:36,100 --> 00:31:38,640
You know,
stuff... about you.
517
00:31:42,100 --> 00:31:43,650
All right.
518
00:31:44,100 --> 00:31:48,600
Mom, I'm home !
519
00:32:45,070 --> 00:32:46,570
Oh, yeah. Oh !
520
00:32:50,070 --> 00:32:54,570
- Jim !
- It's not what it looks like.
521
00:33:00,030 --> 00:33:03,580
Well, we'll just tell your
mother that, uh-- that, uh--
522
00:33:04,030 --> 00:33:05,580
we ate it all.
523
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:48,540
Goal by number eight, Chris Ostreicher.
524
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:54,500
- Nice game.
- Nice game. Good game.
525
00:33:58,000 --> 00:34:00,500
Hey, what are
you doing here ?
526
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:04,500
Just enjoying my first exhilarating
lacrosse experience.
527
00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:07,500
- You kicked butt.
- Oh, thanks.
528
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:10,500
- Um, Chris--
- Oh, you can call me Oz, if you want.
529
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:12,500
- Do I have to ?
- You can call me Ostreicher.
530
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:14,510
- What's your middle name ?
- Nah, forget it.
531
00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:18,510
- Come on. I won't tell anyone.
- Well, neither will I.
532
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:22,510
Okay. Um.
533
00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:25,510
So, I had this thought and--
534
00:34:25,970 --> 00:34:28,510
It may seem like
it's way out of left field.
535
00:34:28,970 --> 00:34:32,510
I don't know if you can,
but since I'm not going with anybody, I thought that maybe--
536
00:34:32,970 --> 00:34:35,470
Those guys sucked ass !
537
00:34:35,970 --> 00:34:37,470
Choir chick, what the hell
are you doing here ?
538
00:34:37,970 --> 00:34:42,470
Well, uh, I was
asking Chris to prom.
539
00:34:42,970 --> 00:34:44,470
So, do you
want to go ?
540
00:34:44,970 --> 00:34:48,470
Oh, yeah !
That would be great.
541
00:34:48,970 --> 00:34:51,470
Well, just don't
expect Oz to pay for the limo !
542
00:34:51,970 --> 00:34:54,470
Stifler, fuck !
I mean--
543
00:34:54,970 --> 00:34:59,470
Why do you got to be so
insensitive all the time ?
544
00:34:59,930 --> 00:35:02,470
What ?
545
00:35:02,930 --> 00:35:06,470
Whatever. Look, uh, don't forget.
My cottage after prom.
546
00:35:06,930 --> 00:35:08,470
On Lake Michigan.
547
00:35:08,930 --> 00:35:11,470
Hey, wait up, you pussies.
Where you going ?
548
00:35:11,930 --> 00:35:16,430
Ah, well, I gotta--
I gotta hit the showers now,
549
00:35:16,930 --> 00:35:20,430
but I think this is gonna
be really, really good.
550
00:35:20,930 --> 00:35:24,430
- Yeah. Me too.
- All right.
551
00:35:24,930 --> 00:35:26,430
- Bye.
- Bye. Bye.
552
00:35:31,940 --> 00:35:35,440
- 'Appending Oz !
- Working with the choir chick ?
553
00:35:35,940 --> 00:35:39,440
What d'ya say, fellas ? I just dig
those cute little sweaters she wears.
554
00:35:39,890 --> 00:35:43,440
- Nuts you do, you little horn dog.
555
00:35:43,900 --> 00:35:46,440
Yeah !
Yeah, baby !
556
00:35:46,900 --> 00:35:50,440
Spank me ! Spank me !
Hit that high "C."
557
00:35:50,900 --> 00:35:52,440
-** Ahhhh -**
558
00:35:55,900 --> 00:35:58,400
Come on !
What's going on here ?
559
00:36:03,900 --> 00:36:05,400
I was being selfish
and majorly insensitive.
560
00:36:05,900 --> 00:36:08,400
I'm a-- I'm a total idiot.
I mean, a fool, a buffoon.
561
00:36:08,900 --> 00:36:11,400
I think shithead
really says it.
562
00:36:11,900 --> 00:36:13,400
You know what ? You're right.
I'm a shithead, and I want to make it up to you.
563
00:36:13,900 --> 00:36:15,400
You know what ? You're right.
I'm a shithead, and I want to make it up to you.
564
00:36:15,900 --> 00:36:18,400
Oh, yeah ? How ?
565
00:36:19,860 --> 00:36:22,400
Oh. Oh. Oh. Ohh !
- -** Don't make me -**
566
00:36:22,860 --> 00:36:24,400
- -** Over -**
- Vicky. Shh. Your parents are downstairs.
567
00:36:24,860 --> 00:36:28,400
- Kevin, don't stop !
- Just a second.
568
00:36:28,860 --> 00:36:31,400
-** I'm rocking steady -**
569
00:36:31,860 --> 00:36:33,400
-** In demonology -**
570
00:36:34,860 --> 00:36:39,360
-** Hey so that you could make it -**
571
00:36:42,860 --> 00:36:46,370
- -** You're really making it -**-**
- Hon, can you tell Vic to come on down for supper ?
572
00:36:46,870 --> 00:36:52,370
- [ Screams ] Holy shit !
- Shh. You know there's no lock on your door ?
573
00:36:57,870 --> 00:37:00,370
Ohh ! I'm coming !
I'm coming !
574
00:37:05,830 --> 00:37:07,370
- Oh, Jim !
- Dad.
575
00:37:07,830 --> 00:37:10,370
Hi, I was just looking
at the old family portrait out here.
576
00:37:10,830 --> 00:37:13,370
Well, that was
a fun day wasn't it ?
577
00:37:13,830 --> 00:37:15,370
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.
578
00:37:15,830 --> 00:37:20,370
Jim, I want to talk
about masturbation.
579
00:37:20,830 --> 00:37:24,330
Now, I just want you to know that
it's-it's a perfectly normal, uh, thing.
580
00:37:24,830 --> 00:37:26,330
And I have
to admit, uh, you know.
581
00:37:26,830 --> 00:37:31,330
I did a fair bit of masturbating
when I was a little younger.
582
00:37:31,830 --> 00:37:35,330
- I, uh-- I used to call it
"stroking the salami."
583
00:37:35,830 --> 00:37:38,330
Yeah, you know,
"pounding the ol' pud."
584
00:37:38,830 --> 00:37:41,330
I never did it
with baked goods.
585
00:37:41,830 --> 00:37:45,330
But you know your Uncle Mort ?
He "pinched the one-eyed snake" five, six times a day.
586
00:37:45,790 --> 00:37:49,330
See, it's like, uh,
practice for the big game.
587
00:37:49,790 --> 00:37:53,330
You see ?
It's like-- It's like...
588
00:37:53,790 --> 00:37:55,340
banging a tennis ball
against a brick wall.
589
00:37:56,790 --> 00:38:00,340
Which can be fun.
It can be fun, but it's not a game.
590
00:38:00,790 --> 00:38:02,290
- Right. No.
- It's not a game.
591
00:38:02,790 --> 00:38:06,300
What you want is you want
a partner to return the ball.
592
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:10,300
- Do you want a partner ?
- Yeah. Yeah-Yeah, I want a partner.
593
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:12,300
- You do want a partner ?
- Oh, I want a partner.
594
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:16,300
- Want a partner. Good. Good.
- Of course.
595
00:38:16,800 --> 00:38:18,300
Good.
596
00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:22,300
So, once Hal becomes king,
he has to take on...
597
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:25,300
the responsibilities of leadership
and turn his back...
598
00:38:25,760 --> 00:38:27,300
on his old,
drunken friend, Falstaff.
599
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:32,300
You see, Hal is going through a...
rite of passage, much like you all are.
600
00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:36,300
So make most of the time you've got
left together. You'll miss it later.
601
00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:38,300
- So, does your tongue cramp up ?
602
00:38:38,760 --> 00:38:43,300
- Nah. You get kind of dizzy, though.
- Wow.
603
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:47,260
That's amazing. She's probably
gonna want to do it soon.
604
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:52,260
- All right. Class dismissed.
605
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:59,260
Still questing after the Holy Grail,
huh, guys ?
606
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:04,260
Hey, uh,
where's Finch ?
607
00:39:04,760 --> 00:39:06,260
- Oh, he went home to take a shit.
608
00:39:06,720 --> 00:39:08,260
I don't get it.
I just don't.
609
00:39:09,720 --> 00:39:11,260
How does a guy like that
get this sudden reputation ?
610
00:39:11,720 --> 00:39:15,270
- What reputation ?
- Observe.
611
00:39:15,720 --> 00:39:19,270
Ex-Excuse me.
Do you know who Paul Finch is ?
612
00:39:19,730 --> 00:39:22,270
Yeah ! He's the guy
with the tattoo, right ?
613
00:39:22,730 --> 00:39:28,230
- You know, the eagle and the
blazing fire and that stuff.
614
00:39:28,730 --> 00:39:32,230
Well, um, if you guys see him later,
will you tell him Courtney says hi ?
615
00:39:32,730 --> 00:39:35,230
Bye.
616
00:39:35,730 --> 00:39:39,230
- Okay. Explain.
617
00:39:39,730 --> 00:39:42,230
I can't. I don't
know how he's doing it.
618
00:39:42,730 --> 00:39:45,230
I, uh-- I guess that
just leaves Jim trailing.
619
00:39:45,730 --> 00:39:47,230
- Aw, Jimbo !
- Better sack up, buddy !
620
00:39:47,690 --> 00:39:49,230
Yeah, I know.
I'm working on it, all right ?
621
00:39:50,690 --> 00:39:52,230
James ?
622
00:39:52,690 --> 00:39:54,230
You are very good
in the world history class, yes ?
623
00:39:54,690 --> 00:39:58,230
- Me ? Y-Yes. No, uh--
624
00:39:58,690 --> 00:40:01,230
- Yes, I am.
- Perhaps you could help me with my studies.
625
00:40:01,690 --> 00:40:04,230
Uh, yeah. Absolutely.
626
00:40:04,690 --> 00:40:06,230
Tha-Tha-Tha-- That would be--
That would be great sometime.
627
00:40:06,690 --> 00:40:10,190
- How about tomorrow ?
- Well, I have ballet practice.
628
00:40:10,690 --> 00:40:14,190
Perhaps I could come
by your house afterwards ?
629
00:40:14,690 --> 00:40:16,190
I could change
clothes at your place.
630
00:40:18,690 --> 00:40:21,190
Oh. Uh... yeah.
631
00:40:21,690 --> 00:40:25,190
I suppose that
would be okay. Sure.
632
00:40:31,650 --> 00:40:36,200
- Nice car !
633
00:40:36,660 --> 00:40:38,200
- I'm glad you think so.
- You don't like it ?
634
00:40:38,660 --> 00:40:42,200
No, I like the car.
By the way, though, about prom ?
635
00:40:42,660 --> 00:40:45,200
That was a bad idea.
I'm sorry I invited you.
636
00:40:45,660 --> 00:40:48,200
- What are you talking about ?
- Please.
637
00:40:48,660 --> 00:40:52,160
I asked you because I thought you might
actually be worth going with.
638
00:40:52,660 --> 00:40:55,160
But you are just a jock.
No, wait. You're a jerk.
639
00:40:55,660 --> 00:40:58,160
Wait !
I don't understand.
640
00:40:58,660 --> 00:41:02,160
I saw you making fun of me
with your lacrosse buddies.
641
00:41:02,660 --> 00:41:04,160
Heather, I wasn't
making fun of you.
642
00:41:04,660 --> 00:41:07,160
Gimme a break.
You're so full of it.
643
00:41:10,620 --> 00:41:15,160
Fuck me ! There's gonna be an Eastern
European chick naked in your house.
644
00:41:15,620 --> 00:41:17,160
And you're not gonna
do anything about that ?
645
00:41:17,620 --> 00:41:21,160
What am I gonna do, huh ?
Broadcast her over the Internet ?
646
00:41:21,620 --> 00:41:25,160
- Yeah.
- You can do that ?
647
00:41:28,620 --> 00:41:32,120
[ Scoffs ]
No. I cannot do that to her.
648
00:41:32,620 --> 00:41:36,120
Jim, get some fucking balls.
649
00:41:36,620 --> 00:41:40,120
If you don't have the guts
to photograph a naked chick, how you gonna sleep with one ?
650
00:41:41,630 --> 00:41:43,120
I don't like the kid,
but he's got a point.
651
00:41:43,630 --> 00:41:46,130
See, even shit-brick
knows you should do it.
652
00:41:47,630 --> 00:41:50,130
All you gotta do is set up some sort of
private link or whatever on the 'Net...
653
00:41:50,630 --> 00:41:52,130
and tell me the address.
654
00:41:52,580 --> 00:41:55,130
You can send me
the address too.
655
00:41:55,590 --> 00:41:58,130
I'll save
you a seat.
656
00:41:58,590 --> 00:42:04,130
-** How sweet it is
to be loved by you, by you -**
657
00:42:04,590 --> 00:42:08,130
- -** I needed the shelter
of someone's arms -** - -** Someone's arms -**
658
00:42:08,590 --> 00:42:12,090
- -** There you were -**
- -** You were, oh -**
659
00:42:12,590 --> 00:42:17,090
-** I needed someone
who understands my ups and downs -**
660
00:42:17,590 --> 00:42:19,090
-** There you were -**-**
661
00:42:19,590 --> 00:42:23,090
Okay, that was good, but
I want to thicken-up that solo.
662
00:42:23,590 --> 00:42:26,090
Michigan State is this Saturday,
and I want that part to smoke.
663
00:42:26,590 --> 00:42:28,090
Yeah, I know,
my timing's off.
664
00:42:28,590 --> 00:42:32,090
No, it's not that. I think it'll
work better as a duet with a tenor part.
665
00:42:32,590 --> 00:42:34,090
I'll do it.
666
00:42:35,550 --> 00:42:38,090
- Dick.
- I'll do it.
667
00:42:38,550 --> 00:42:40,090
Great.
See you tomorrow.
668
00:42:42,550 --> 00:42:44,090
Hmph.
669
00:42:47,550 --> 00:42:50,100
- Why are you doing this ?
- 'Cause I want to.
670
00:42:50,550 --> 00:42:53,100
Yeah ? Well,
you can't fake this.
671
00:42:53,550 --> 00:42:57,060
You better practice.
672
00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:09,060
- Come in.
673
00:43:11,560 --> 00:43:15,060
Jim ? There's a, uh--
a young lady here to see you.
674
00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:18,060
- Hey, Nadia.
- Hi, James. Ready to study ?
675
00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:20,060
Oh, he's always ready to study.
He's a real bookworm, this kid.
676
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:24,060
- Dad.
- That means-- He's not-not one of those nerdy guys but--
677
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:29,060
- Dad !
- Well, I'll-- I'll let you two hit the books.
678
00:43:33,520 --> 00:43:36,020
You want a beer ?
679
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:40,020
Oh, there we go.
Come on, move !
680
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:44,020
Steve ! It's my computer !
And I wanna use it !
681
00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:46,020
Shut up !
682
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:49,020
Oh, you need to--
You need to change, right ?
683
00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:52,020
- Uhh, do you mind ?
- No. N-No, not at all.
684
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:55,020
Uh, please, you know.
Just go ahead and get un-- get changed.
685
00:43:56,520 --> 00:43:59,020
I'll, uh-- I'll
go downstairs and start studying up.
686
00:43:59,480 --> 00:44:01,020
- Yeah.
- Okay.
687
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:04,020
Oh--
All right, there he goes.
688
00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:05,020
Now,
we're in business.
689
00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:06,020
Now,
we're in business.
690
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:10,030
- Back in a sec.
- Jimmy, honey, wh--
691
00:44:22,490 --> 00:44:26,990
-** He pauses shaving and he tells himself
that he is the bomb -**
692
00:44:27,490 --> 00:44:31,990
-** She has her curlers set, her credit
cards are paying the funds -**
693
00:44:32,490 --> 00:44:34,990
- -** He's not that old I've been told -**-**
- Ah, here she is.
694
00:44:37,490 --> 00:44:39,990
- Did I miss anything ?
- No. You are just in time.
695
00:44:40,450 --> 00:44:43,990
Oh. Ohh !
This is incredible.
696
00:44:44,450 --> 00:44:46,990
Oh, my God !
This is too much.
697
00:44:47,450 --> 00:44:49,990
Oh, did you see ?
Oh, there that goes. Oh, geez.
698
00:44:50,450 --> 00:44:51,990
God bless
the Internet.
699
00:44:52,450 --> 00:44:54,990
- Ai-yi-yi.
- Do it. Take it off.
700
00:44:55,450 --> 00:44:57,990
- Oh, my God.
- Ohhh !
701
00:44:58,450 --> 00:44:59,950
Oh, thank you, God,
for this wonderful, wonderful day.
702
00:45:01,450 --> 00:45:04,950
- She takes her vitamins.
- -** And it is way too unhealthy -**
703
00:45:05,450 --> 00:45:06,950
-** Often they've typically -**-**
704
00:45:07,450 --> 00:45:08,950
- Stop hyper ventilating.
705
00:45:14,450 --> 00:45:18,950
This is, like,
the coolest thing I've ever seen.
706
00:45:19,450 --> 00:45:21,950
- I know.
707
00:45:22,410 --> 00:45:24,960
Can you believe-- This is definitely
one of Stifler's best ideas ever.
708
00:45:27,410 --> 00:45:28,960
What is she--
She's touching my stuff.
709
00:45:29,410 --> 00:45:30,960
- Why is she touching my stuff ?
- Man, let her touch.
710
00:45:32,410 --> 00:45:34,960
- She's going through my stuff !
- Nadia can touch anything she wants.
711
00:45:41,420 --> 00:45:43,920
- Oh.
- Oh, no. Oh, no.
712
00:45:44,420 --> 00:45:46,920
- No, no.
- Oh, nice collection there, Jim.
713
00:45:47,420 --> 00:45:48,920
She's gonna leave.
She's definitely gonna--
714
00:45:50,420 --> 00:45:51,920
She's getting comfortable.
She's not gonna leave.
715
00:45:52,420 --> 00:45:54,920
She reads
the articles.
716
00:46:08,380 --> 00:46:09,920
Is she ?
717
00:46:10,380 --> 00:46:13,920
She's going downstairs.
718
00:46:23,380 --> 00:46:26,880
- Oh, my God !
- Jackpot, baby !
719
00:46:27,380 --> 00:46:30,880
- Can you believe this ?
- Nadia, I would have never known.
720
00:46:31,380 --> 00:46:32,880
I have an announcement
that I would like to make.
721
00:46:34,380 --> 00:46:36,880
There is a gorgeous woman...
masturbating on my bed !
722
00:46:38,380 --> 00:46:42,890
- Thank you, Nadia !
- If you ever had a chance with Nadia, this is it.
723
00:46:43,390 --> 00:46:47,890
- What am I
supposed to do, Kev ? - Seduce her.
724
00:46:48,350 --> 00:46:50,890
Wha-- What the hell
would I say ?
725
00:46:51,350 --> 00:46:53,890
Go over there and ask her
if she needs an extra hand.
726
00:46:54,350 --> 00:46:57,890
- That's stupid, Kev. I can't--
- That's not stupid ! You're stupid if you don't go !
727
00:46:58,350 --> 00:46:59,890
Come on !
Get over there !
728
00:47:00,350 --> 00:47:02,890
- Get going, man. She's prime.
- Get out of here !
729
00:47:03,350 --> 00:47:05,850
- She's waiting for you.
- Okay, all right. I'm going.
730
00:47:06,350 --> 00:47:07,850
- Go !
- Go ! - I'm going !
731
00:47:08,350 --> 00:47:09,850
- Go ! Go ! Go ! Go !
- Oh, shit.
732
00:47:19,350 --> 00:47:22,850
-** She's open
waiting for more -**
733
00:47:23,350 --> 00:47:26,850
-** And I know he's only
looking to score -**
734
00:47:27,310 --> 00:47:29,850
-** And it's way too unhealthy -**
735
00:47:30,310 --> 00:47:31,850
- -** Often they've typically -**
- Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.
736
00:47:32,310 --> 00:47:35,850
-** Been starved
for attention before -**-**
737
00:47:38,310 --> 00:47:40,850
Oh, boy. Oh, God.
Oh, crap. Oh, no.
738
00:47:41,310 --> 00:47:44,860
- Hello ?
739
00:47:45,310 --> 00:47:47,810
- Looks like Jim addressed
the e-mail wrong. - What ?
740
00:47:48,310 --> 00:47:51,810
It went out to every mailbox
in the East High directory.
741
00:47:52,310 --> 00:47:53,810
God, how juvenile.
742
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:55,820
- Hey, hey, hey, guys !
743
00:47:56,310 --> 00:47:59,820
- -** Baby -**
- Check this out ! Oh, my God ! Wow !
744
00:48:03,320 --> 00:48:04,820
Oh.
745
00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:09,820
Please, God,
let this be it.
746
00:48:10,280 --> 00:48:11,820
Please ?
747
00:48:16,280 --> 00:48:20,820
- S-Somebody's going in there.
748
00:48:22,280 --> 00:48:23,820
Here you go.
That's what you need to do.
749
00:48:24,280 --> 00:48:26,780
- That guy's in my trig class.
- Oh, no.
750
00:48:29,280 --> 00:48:32,780
-Looks like you could use an extra hand.
-Jim !
751
00:48:33,280 --> 00:48:35,780
- Well-- Oh, God.
- Shame on you.
752
00:48:36,280 --> 00:48:37,780
Yeah, shame on me.
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
753
00:48:38,280 --> 00:48:39,780
- Uh, you know, I'm just gonna go.
- Well,
754
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:43,780
you have seen me.
755
00:48:44,280 --> 00:48:46,780
Now, it's
my turn to see you.
756
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:51,780
Strip !
757
00:48:52,240 --> 00:48:53,780
- Strip ?
- Slowly.
758
00:48:54,240 --> 00:48:57,780
Uh, you mean,
like, strip strip ?
759
00:48:58,240 --> 00:49:01,790
For me.
760
00:49:02,240 --> 00:49:03,790
What is he
talking to her about ?
761
00:49:04,240 --> 00:49:08,740
- Uh, no idea.
- Come on, Jim. People are viewing. Get to business.
762
00:49:12,250 --> 00:49:14,750
Perfect !
763
00:49:15,250 --> 00:49:17,750
- Move, James ! Move !
- Yeah, yeah. Move.
764
00:49:26,250 --> 00:49:28,750
- Go, trig boy ! It's yer birthday !
765
00:49:40,210 --> 00:49:40,750
- No ! No. No.
- Please, God.
766
00:49:42,210 --> 00:49:43,750
- What's going on ?
767
00:49:49,210 --> 00:49:51,710
- Yes !
- All right. Get in the mix !
768
00:49:52,210 --> 00:49:53,710
- See there.
- Oh, okay.
769
00:49:56,210 --> 00:50:00,710
- This is disgusting.
- What the fuck is this ?
770
00:50:03,210 --> 00:50:04,710
Cut it out, man !
771
00:50:10,210 --> 00:50:11,710
Yeah.
772
00:50:24,170 --> 00:50:25,720
Freak.
773
00:50:30,180 --> 00:50:31,680
Did not just
take out that chair.
774
00:50:32,180 --> 00:50:35,680
- Yup, he took out the chair.
- More, more, you bad boy !
775
00:50:37,180 --> 00:50:40,680
Oh, yeah, I'm naughty. I'm naughty,
baby. Hyah !
776
00:50:41,180 --> 00:50:43,680
Ohh, God !
777
00:50:44,180 --> 00:50:46,680
-** Calling your name -**
778
00:50:47,180 --> 00:50:49,680
- -** Calling your name -**
- Now,
779
00:50:50,180 --> 00:50:52,680
come to me.
780
00:50:53,180 --> 00:50:55,680
Oh, yeah.
781
00:51:02,140 --> 00:51:03,680
- Here we go.
- He's in, man.
782
00:51:05,140 --> 00:51:05,680
- -** Calling -**
- This just got a hell of a lot better.
783
00:51:06,140 --> 00:51:09,680
- Be gentle.
- Okay.
784
00:51:12,140 --> 00:51:14,640
- -** Calling your name -**
- Uh--
785
00:51:15,140 --> 00:51:16,640
- -** Calling -**
- Oh.
786
00:51:17,140 --> 00:51:19,640
-** Your name -**-**
787
00:51:20,140 --> 00:51:21,640
- Jim ?
788
00:51:22,140 --> 00:51:25,640
- Oh ! Oh, no.
789
00:51:26,140 --> 00:51:28,640
- Oh. Ohh !
- Liftoff aborted.
790
00:51:30,140 --> 00:51:32,650
- Houston, we have a problem.
- Oh-- Uhh--
791
00:51:33,140 --> 00:51:35,640
- What happened ? What did he do
792
00:51:36,100 --> 00:51:37,650
He blew it.
793
00:51:38,100 --> 00:51:40,650
I guess
I'll be going now.
794
00:51:41,100 --> 00:51:45,650
No, no, no, I'm-- I'm not done, Nadia.
I've, uh-- I've got reserves.
795
00:51:46,110 --> 00:51:48,650
Nadia, please, please.
I'm begging you.
796
00:51:49,110 --> 00:51:51,650
Well, I do like
your dirty magazines.
797
00:51:52,110 --> 00:51:56,610
You do ? Okay. Well. Um.
Did-Did-- Did you see this one ?
798
00:51:57,110 --> 00:52:01,610
This here is your-- is your more,
uh, exotic, risque magazine.
799
00:52:02,110 --> 00:52:03,610
- He's pulling out the porn.
- He's desperate.
800
00:52:04,110 --> 00:52:05,610
Jim, just wait
till she leaves.
801
00:52:06,110 --> 00:52:08,610
Very arousing women.
They arouse me--
802
00:52:09,110 --> 00:52:10,610
They arouse me
very, very much.
803
00:52:11,110 --> 00:52:14,610
But, uh--
But not as arousing as you.
804
00:52:15,110 --> 00:52:18,610
- Oh, Jim !
- Oh, God !
805
00:52:23,070 --> 00:52:26,610
Yes !
806
00:52:27,070 --> 00:52:28,610
He's ruining daisy !
Whoo !
807
00:52:32,070 --> 00:52:35,610
So, uh, "shaved"
is the expression ?
808
00:52:39,070 --> 00:52:40,570
Holy shit.
809
00:52:41,070 --> 00:52:43,570
- Holy shit !
- Holy shit !
810
00:52:45,070 --> 00:52:46,570
- H-H-Holy shit !
- Touch me, Jim.
811
00:52:50,070 --> 00:52:51,580
- Here.
812
00:52:52,080 --> 00:52:54,580
Oh. Oh.
813
00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:57,580
- Again ?
- Not again.
814
00:52:58,080 --> 00:53:00,580
- Not again, man !
- Is that possible ?
815
00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:02,580
What a loser.
816
00:53:03,030 --> 00:53:03,580
What a loser
817
00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:34,540
-** I needed someone
to understand my ups and downs -**
818
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:37,540
-** There you were -**
819
00:53:38,040 --> 00:53:42,540
-** With sweet love
and devotion -**
820
00:53:43,000 --> 00:53:44,540
-** Deeply touching
my emotion -**
821
00:53:45,000 --> 00:53:49,540
-** I just wanna stop
and thank you, baby -**-**
822
00:53:52,000 --> 00:53:54,540
- Hey, minute man !
- Shut up.
823
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:56,550
You know-- You know you're
supposed to be supportive.
824
00:53:57,000 --> 00:54:00,500
Hey, you think you still
got a chance with Nadia ?
825
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:03,500
No. Her sponsors here
saw the thing on the 'Net.
826
00:54:04,000 --> 00:54:05,500
I-I really don't
think they liked it.
827
00:54:06,010 --> 00:54:08,510
How do
you know that ?
828
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:10,510
- She's already on a plane back home.
829
00:54:11,010 --> 00:54:12,510
Yeah.
830
00:54:13,010 --> 00:54:16,510
You know, guys ? Maybe I'm just
not good with girls, period.
831
00:54:17,010 --> 00:54:19,510
No-no-no, really-really. Like-- Like I
was born without that part of the brain.
832
00:54:20,010 --> 00:54:21,510
I mean, I can't
talk to girls.
833
00:54:21,970 --> 00:54:23,510
And when I do talk
to them, I screw it up.
834
00:54:24,970 --> 00:54:27,510
Yeah, well, come prom those excuses
aren't going to do you any good.
835
00:54:28,970 --> 00:54:32,510
And one time at band camp,
836
00:54:32,970 --> 00:54:34,510
we weren't supposed
to have pillow fights,
837
00:54:34,970 --> 00:54:38,510
but we had a pillow fight,
and it was so much fun.
838
00:54:38,970 --> 00:54:43,470
A-And this one time, we all
lost our music and we were supposed to play this song,
839
00:54:43,970 --> 00:54:48,470
but we didn't know it, so we just made
it up and we kept playing and playing,
840
00:54:48,970 --> 00:54:52,470
and the conductor didn't know
what we were doing, and it was so funny.
841
00:54:52,970 --> 00:54:54,470
-So, you're pissed about something, huh.
842
00:54:55,970 --> 00:54:56,470
You know what
I do when I'm angry ?
843
00:54:57,970 --> 00:55:00,470
I just play some Bach on my flute.
It's so relaxing.
844
00:55:00,970 --> 00:55:03,470
- I learned to do that at band camp.
- Hold on, uh--
845
00:55:03,930 --> 00:55:06,470
You have no idea
why I'm angry ?
846
00:55:07,930 --> 00:55:10,470
Is it because we have a test tomorrow ?
Sometimes I get cranky...
847
00:55:10,930 --> 00:55:13,480
- when I know I have
a big test to study for.
848
00:55:13,930 --> 00:55:17,480
- Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty much it.
- I thought so...
849
00:55:17,930 --> 00:55:20,480
- because this one time at band camp--
- W-What's your name ?
850
00:55:20,930 --> 00:55:22,480
- Michelle.
- O-Okay.
851
00:55:22,940 --> 00:55:24,430
Michelle, um--
852
00:55:24,940 --> 00:55:27,440
Do you want to be
my date for the prom ?
853
00:55:27,940 --> 00:55:31,440
Really ? You seriously
want to go with me ?
854
00:55:34,940 --> 00:55:37,440
Yes. Seriously.
855
00:55:37,940 --> 00:55:41,440
Are we going to Steve Stifler's
party afterwards ? Because that would be so cool.
856
00:55:41,940 --> 00:55:46,440
- Sure, whatever you want.
- Cool ! We're gonna have such a good time.
857
00:55:46,900 --> 00:55:52,440
It'll be like this one time at band camp
when we all had a campfire--
858
00:56:06,900 --> 00:56:09,400
Hi.
859
00:56:09,900 --> 00:56:13,400
- How'd you know I was here ?
- Stifler told me.
860
00:56:13,900 --> 00:56:17,400
- Talked to Stifler ?
- Well, I needed to find you.
861
00:56:17,900 --> 00:56:19,400
We're gonna have
to work on that song.
862
00:56:20,900 --> 00:56:23,400
Okay.
I'm glad you came by.
863
00:56:23,900 --> 00:56:25,400
So you work nights ?
864
00:56:27,860 --> 00:56:30,400
- My dad's the manager.
- Really ?
865
00:56:30,860 --> 00:56:33,410
Cool. Tell him
the subs are great.
866
00:56:36,860 --> 00:56:38,410
-So you're going to Michigan next year ?
-Yeah.
867
00:56:38,860 --> 00:56:41,410
My parents want me to go
to Northwestern, but...
868
00:56:41,870 --> 00:56:44,410
I don't wanna write all those
extra essays they make you do.
869
00:56:44,870 --> 00:56:50,370
I mean, how am I supposed to
know what my "most emotionally significant moment" was ?
870
00:56:50,870 --> 00:56:55,370
So when my "U" of "M" acceptance came in
December, I just said the hell with it.
871
00:56:55,870 --> 00:56:57,370
- Onions ?
- What ?
872
00:56:57,870 --> 00:56:59,370
You, uh, want onions ?
873
00:56:59,870 --> 00:57:01,370
Oh, no, thank you.
874
00:57:04,870 --> 00:57:07,370
So what are you
gonna major in ?
875
00:57:07,870 --> 00:57:11,370
State's got a good business
school, and I could probably walk-on to the lacrosse team.
876
00:57:11,830 --> 00:57:15,370
Well, you've probably got it
pretty figured out, then, huh ?
877
00:57:15,830 --> 00:57:19,370
I mean, business is okay,
and lacrosse is awesome, but...
878
00:57:19,830 --> 00:57:22,370
what am I gonna be,
a professional lacrosse player ?
879
00:57:22,830 --> 00:57:24,370
I really have no idea.
880
00:57:24,830 --> 00:57:27,370
Thank God.
I thought I was the only one.
881
00:57:27,830 --> 00:57:29,330
Well, you're not.
882
00:57:31,830 --> 00:57:33,330
So we're gonna be
close next year.
883
00:57:41,830 --> 00:57:43,330
You mean East Lansing
and Ann Arbor ?
884
00:57:43,830 --> 00:57:46,330
Yeah.
885
00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:48,340
What are you
talking about ?
886
00:57:48,840 --> 00:57:52,340
I can't go to the prom with you.
I'm holding out for someone else.
887
00:57:52,790 --> 00:57:54,340
You gotta be fucking kidding me.
888
00:57:54,790 --> 00:57:59,340
I know it's a long shot, but I figure
Paul Finch might ask me.
889
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:03,340
Finch.
Shit-brick.
890
00:58:03,800 --> 00:58:06,340
Oh, gosh.
I-I forgot.
891
00:58:06,800 --> 00:58:08,340
You look okay.
892
00:58:08,800 --> 00:58:12,300
I-I mean, the scars
healed really well.
893
00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:14,300
- Hey, Stifler.
- Eat shit.
894
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:18,300
What was that
all about ?
895
00:58:19,800 --> 00:58:23,300
- He's still embarrassed
because Finch kicked his ass. - Who told you that ?
896
00:58:23,800 --> 00:58:25,300
What do you mean,
"no comment" ?
897
00:58:25,800 --> 00:58:28,300
- Did you two hook up or something ?
- What, are you kidding ? No.
898
00:58:28,800 --> 00:58:32,300
Then how did all this
get started ?
899
00:58:32,760 --> 00:58:35,300
Well, I guess it's all right
for me to tell you now.
900
00:58:35,760 --> 00:58:39,300
That reputation of his isn't
going anywhere. Cheese, please.
901
00:58:39,760 --> 00:58:42,300
Finch comes up to me
and says, "Jessica,
902
00:58:42,760 --> 00:58:44,300
I need your help with this,
blah, blah, etcetera."
903
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:47,300
So I said, "All right.
Pay me 200 bucks,
904
00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:50,300
and I'll tell a couple of girls
that you're dynamite in bed."
905
00:58:50,760 --> 00:58:52,260
So he did,
and I did.
906
00:58:53,760 --> 00:58:55,260
- That actually works ?
- Well, duh ! Of course.
907
00:58:55,760 --> 00:58:57,260
Naturally, I embellished
a little bit.
908
00:58:57,760 --> 00:59:00,260
Did you hear that Finch had
an affair with an older woman ?
909
00:59:00,760 --> 00:59:02,270
No, I didn't hear that one.
910
00:59:02,760 --> 00:59:04,260
That one was my favorite.
911
00:59:05,770 --> 00:59:07,270
Do that cheerleader.
912
00:59:07,770 --> 00:59:10,270
- -** Thank you, baby -**
- She wants me. She calls me up--
913
00:59:10,770 --> 00:59:15,270
-** How sweet it is
to be loved by you -**-**
914
00:59:15,730 --> 00:59:18,270
Oh, my God,
you're gay !
915
00:59:18,730 --> 00:59:20,270
Sing it with me.
You know the words.
916
00:59:20,730 --> 00:59:23,270
No, thanks, man. You've been
singing that shit all week.
917
00:59:23,730 --> 00:59:27,270
If you try that at M.S.U.
this Saturday, I'll kick your ass.
918
00:59:27,730 --> 00:59:29,270
Our last game
is this Saturday.
919
00:59:29,730 --> 00:59:31,270
Yeah, well, shit.
920
00:59:34,730 --> 00:59:38,230
I've got this lacrosse game. It's
really important. It's our last game.
921
00:59:38,730 --> 00:59:42,230
Central almost beat us last time, so
this time I really wanna kick their ass.
922
00:59:42,730 --> 00:59:45,230
But it's gonna be cool,
because the game's at State,
923
00:59:45,730 --> 00:59:48,230
which means afterwards
I'll be able to stop by.
924
00:59:48,730 --> 00:59:50,230
So you can't sing
at the competition.
925
00:59:50,730 --> 00:59:52,230
Heather, I'm sorry.
I totally blew it.
926
00:59:52,730 --> 00:59:57,230
It's okay. You should...
do what makes you happy.
927
00:59:59,690 --> 01:00:03,230
All right. Listen,
thanks for understanding.
928
01:00:03,690 --> 01:00:05,230
Yeah.
929
01:00:05,690 --> 01:00:08,230
So, uh, I guess
I'll see you later ?
930
01:00:08,690 --> 01:00:11,230
Mm-hmm.
931
01:00:23,700 --> 01:00:26,200
Hey, Kevin.
932
01:00:26,700 --> 01:00:31,200
- You seen shit-brick lately ?
- Why ? What did you do to him ?
933
01:00:31,700 --> 01:00:33,200
Me ? Nothing.
934
01:00:33,700 --> 01:00:36,200
See, I'm the one
whose ass he kicked.
935
01:00:36,660 --> 01:00:39,200
But, uh, I'll tell you
one thing, though.
936
01:00:39,660 --> 01:00:43,200
I don't think he's gonna have a problem
shitting in school anymore.
937
01:00:43,660 --> 01:00:45,200
Slipped a little something
into his mochaccino.
938
01:00:47,660 --> 01:00:50,200
Oh, God !
939
01:00:51,660 --> 01:00:53,200
Oh ! Oh !
940
01:00:59,660 --> 01:01:01,160
Jesus.
941
01:01:02,660 --> 01:01:04,160
Right this way,
sir.
942
01:01:10,660 --> 01:01:13,160
Oh, God.
943
01:01:41,630 --> 01:01:44,130
- Oh, no.
944
01:01:45,630 --> 01:01:47,130
It's gonna be fun.
945
01:01:47,630 --> 01:01:49,130
You know it's just gonna be
some crappy band and stupid decorations.
946
01:01:49,630 --> 01:01:53,130
You're just saying
that because prom's a week away and you don't have a date.
947
01:01:53,630 --> 01:01:56,130
No, no, no.
I don't want a date.
948
01:01:56,630 --> 01:02:00,130
- Finch is going stag and... so am I.
949
01:02:00,590 --> 01:02:04,130
God, he's like so...
refined.
950
01:02:04,590 --> 01:02:07,130
- You think that older woman thing is true ?
951
01:02:07,590 --> 01:02:10,130
Yeah, it's true.
It was Stifler's mom.
952
01:02:12,590 --> 01:02:16,130
- Joanie, was that you ?
953
01:02:16,590 --> 01:02:18,130
- Oh !
- Can't hold it.
954
01:02:18,590 --> 01:02:21,090
Oh !
955
01:02:50,550 --> 01:02:54,100
- Yeah !
956
01:02:54,560 --> 01:02:57,100
Kev ?
I think we've come...
957
01:02:57,560 --> 01:03:01,060
- a really long way since homecoming.
- Yeah, we have.
958
01:03:01,560 --> 01:03:03,060
Maybe it's time...
959
01:03:03,560 --> 01:03:07,060
we start to express ourselves
in new ways.
960
01:03:07,560 --> 01:03:09,060
- Yeah.
- You wanna do it ?
961
01:03:09,560 --> 01:03:12,060
- Yeah.
- I love you.
962
01:03:14,560 --> 01:03:16,060
It's your turn.
963
01:03:17,560 --> 01:03:20,060
That's not
what I was thinking.
964
01:03:20,560 --> 01:03:24,060
Sex. It's always
about sex.
965
01:03:24,520 --> 01:03:27,060
It's not
always about sex.
966
01:03:27,520 --> 01:03:30,060
I just thought it was
about sex this time.
967
01:03:34,520 --> 01:03:38,060
Look, Vicky, love is a term
that gets thrown around,
968
01:03:38,520 --> 01:03:40,060
and-and people
don't mean it.
969
01:03:40,520 --> 01:03:43,020
When I say it, I want it
to be more than words.
970
01:03:43,520 --> 01:03:46,020
- You know ? I want it to be--
- Perfect.
971
01:03:48,520 --> 01:03:50,020
Exactly.
972
01:03:50,520 --> 01:03:53,020
Okay, Albert.
You ready ? - No problemo.
973
01:03:54,520 --> 01:03:58,020
-** I close my eyes
at night -**
974
01:03:58,530 --> 01:04:01,030
Come on, Heather.
Work with me here.
975
01:04:06,480 --> 01:04:09,030
Goal, Ostreicher !
976
01:04:09,480 --> 01:04:13,030
- All right, Oz !
- Atta boy, Ozzie !
977
01:04:13,490 --> 01:04:15,030
Whoo !
Yeah, baby !
978
01:04:15,490 --> 01:04:17,030
- We're crushing you losers !
- Let's go, fellas !
979
01:04:17,490 --> 01:04:19,030
Come on !
Whoo-hoo !
980
01:04:21,490 --> 01:04:25,990
-** Bumblebee, bumblebee,
bumblebee, bumblebee, bumblebee -**
981
01:04:26,490 --> 01:04:27,990
Focus on the music.
Think melody.
982
01:04:28,490 --> 01:04:30,990
- Let the music be my guide.
- That would be a start.
983
01:04:42,490 --> 01:04:43,990
Who's the man ?
Stifler !
984
01:04:47,450 --> 01:04:48,990
Huddle up, guys ! Huddle up !
985
01:04:57,450 --> 01:05:00,990
Huddle up !
Come on ! Okay.
986
01:05:01,450 --> 01:05:02,990
All right, all right !
987
01:05:03,450 --> 01:05:04,990
- Good hustle, guys.
- Good hustle.
988
01:05:05,450 --> 01:05:09,950
But you can still lose. You all saw
what happened to Oz out there.
989
01:05:10,450 --> 01:05:14,960
I don't want to ever see any of you
thinking you're gonna score.
990
01:05:15,450 --> 01:05:17,960
You don't score
until you score.
991
01:05:19,460 --> 01:05:20,960
- Until you score.
- That's right, baby !
992
01:05:21,460 --> 01:05:22,960
It all boils down
to today.
993
01:05:23,460 --> 01:05:26,960
For you seniors,
this marks the culmination...
994
01:05:27,460 --> 01:05:29,960
- of the past four years.
- Culmination.
995
01:05:31,420 --> 01:05:34,960
I want you to think about
what this means to you.
996
01:05:35,420 --> 01:05:37,960
Do you guys wanna look back
on your days at East...
997
01:05:38,420 --> 01:05:41,960
and know that you used
the time you had ?
998
01:05:42,420 --> 01:05:44,960
- Hell, yeah !
- You do !
999
01:05:47,420 --> 01:05:49,920
- Ah ! Good attitude, Ostreicher.
- Good luck, fellas.
1000
01:05:50,420 --> 01:05:53,920
Christ, I didn't tell ya
to leave the game.
1001
01:05:54,420 --> 01:05:55,920
I'm sorry, Coach.
1002
01:05:56,420 --> 01:05:58,920
You got someplace more important
to be, Ostreicher ?
1003
01:05:59,420 --> 01:06:00,920
Yeah.
1004
01:06:01,420 --> 01:06:02,920
Ostreicher !
1005
01:06:04,420 --> 01:06:07,920
Oz ?
Fuckface ?
1006
01:06:08,420 --> 01:06:10,920
Ostreicher !
1007
01:06:36,390 --> 01:06:37,890
- Hey, Oz !
- Ozmeister !
1008
01:06:39,390 --> 01:06:40,890
- Oh, great.
- What about the game ?
1009
01:06:41,390 --> 01:06:43,890
- I'm not playing.
- You're missing the game for us ?
1010
01:06:44,390 --> 01:06:46,890
No, I'm missing the game
for you.
1011
01:06:50,390 --> 01:06:53,890
- D-Does this mean I'm not
gonna get to do the duet ? - Albert, you suck.
1012
01:06:59,350 --> 01:07:00,890
I don't think
he's coming back.
1013
01:07:01,350 --> 01:07:02,890
-** Close my eyes at night -**
1014
01:07:03,350 --> 01:07:07,890
- -** Close my eyes -**
- -** Wondering where would I be without you in my life -**
1015
01:07:08,350 --> 01:07:11,850
- -** Oh -**
- -** Everything I did was just a bore -**
1016
01:07:12,350 --> 01:07:16,850
- -** Just a bore -**
- -** Everywhere I went seems I been there before -**
1017
01:07:17,350 --> 01:07:21,850
-** But you brighten up
for me all of my days -**
1018
01:07:22,350 --> 01:07:24,850
- -** With a love so sweet -**
- -** In so many ways -**
1019
01:07:25,350 --> 01:07:26,850
-** I just wanna stop -**
1020
01:07:27,350 --> 01:07:31,850
- -** And thank you, baby -**
-** I just wanna stop -**
1021
01:07:32,350 --> 01:07:34,850
- -** And thank you, baby -**
- -** Thank you, baby -**
1022
01:07:35,310 --> 01:07:39,850
-** How sweet it is
to be loved by you -**-**
1023
01:07:43,310 --> 01:07:44,860
Yeah, Oz !
You fucking rule !
1024
01:07:45,310 --> 01:07:47,860
- Fucking rule !
- Yeah !
1025
01:07:51,320 --> 01:07:52,820
Maybe the words
aren't that important.
1026
01:07:53,320 --> 01:07:54,820
It's like, I know he
really cares about me, you know ?
1027
01:07:55,320 --> 01:07:56,820
Even if he can't
say it, he does.
1028
01:07:57,320 --> 01:08:00,820
And yeah, he always talks about sex, but
that's okay, 'cause he's a guy, right ?
1029
01:08:01,320 --> 01:08:03,820
- He's got a dick. He's a guy.
- Right.
1030
01:08:04,320 --> 01:08:05,820
Wait. Is this
translation right ?
1031
01:08:06,320 --> 01:08:08,820
"Go home, bird teacher.
I've had enough."
1032
01:08:09,320 --> 01:08:11,820
I don't know.
I got it from Kevin.
1033
01:08:12,320 --> 01:08:15,820
- So, does it hurt ?
- What ?
1034
01:08:16,280 --> 01:08:18,820
You know-- sex.
Does it hurt ?
1035
01:08:19,280 --> 01:08:22,820
Yeah. I mean, the first time you do it,
you know, it hurts.
1036
01:08:23,280 --> 01:08:26,820
But then you, you do it again
and again and again--
1037
01:08:27,280 --> 01:08:30,820
It just starts to feel good.
Really good.
1038
01:08:31,280 --> 01:08:33,820
Okay, so say
I don't do it.
1039
01:08:34,280 --> 01:08:38,780
And then I go off to college. I might
end up doing it with some random guy...
1040
01:08:39,280 --> 01:08:41,780
- who totally turns out to be a jerk.
- This is true.
1041
01:08:42,280 --> 01:08:44,780
And I'll wish I would've
done it with Kevin.
1042
01:08:45,280 --> 01:08:46,780
So go do it with Kevin.
1043
01:08:48,280 --> 01:08:50,780
- You think ?
- Yeah. You're-- You're ready.
1044
01:08:51,280 --> 01:08:54,790
- You're woman. Look at you.
You're ready for sex. - You're right.
1045
01:08:55,280 --> 01:08:56,790
- I know.
- I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna have sex.
1046
01:08:58,240 --> 01:08:59,790
- Now.
- And it's gonna be right, and it's gonna be just perfect.
1047
01:09:00,240 --> 01:09:01,790
- Perfect sex.
- Thanks, Jessica.
1048
01:09:03,240 --> 01:09:04,790
Please.
1049
01:09:05,250 --> 01:09:07,790
Kevin.
1050
01:09:08,250 --> 01:09:09,790
Kevin.
1051
01:09:12,250 --> 01:09:14,790
I wanna have sex.
Now ?
1052
01:09:20,250 --> 01:09:21,750
Prom.
1053
01:09:24,250 --> 01:09:29,750
-** As you walk up those steps
and garner your award -**
1054
01:09:30,250 --> 01:09:33,750
-** Try not to forget about me -**
1055
01:09:34,250 --> 01:09:36,750
-** 'Cause I was there when you
had no one else to hold -**
1056
01:09:40,210 --> 01:09:42,750
-** You used to look
just like a saint -**
1057
01:09:43,210 --> 01:09:44,750
-** And stumble into walls -**
1058
01:09:45,210 --> 01:09:48,750
-** You're a guy's
very own quarantine -**
1059
01:09:49,210 --> 01:09:52,750
-** You used to never
think you'd ever grow old -**-**
1060
01:10:04,210 --> 01:10:05,710
You must be excited
about the big night tonight.
1061
01:10:06,210 --> 01:10:08,710
Thrilled.
1062
01:10:09,210 --> 01:10:09,710
Who's the lucky girl ?
1063
01:10:10,220 --> 01:10:11,710
Who's the lucky girl ?
1064
01:10:12,220 --> 01:10:13,720
Michelle.
1065
01:10:14,220 --> 01:10:16,720
- Michelle.
- Yeah.
1066
01:10:17,220 --> 01:10:20,720
- She must be very special.
- Oh, she's special, all right.
1067
01:10:21,170 --> 01:10:23,720
I'm sure she is special if you
picked her out of the whole bunch.
1068
01:10:27,180 --> 01:10:29,720
Jim, I'm just gonna
say one thing...
1069
01:10:30,180 --> 01:10:31,720
before you leave
tonight.
1070
01:10:33,180 --> 01:10:37,720
I want you to be very,
very careful...
1071
01:10:38,180 --> 01:10:39,680
when you're
putting on...
1072
01:10:40,180 --> 01:10:42,680
the corsage.
1073
01:10:46,180 --> 01:10:47,680
Okay, Dad.
1074
01:10:48,180 --> 01:10:49,680
- Promise me.
- I promise.
1075
01:11:11,140 --> 01:11:14,680
-** Midnight at the oasis -**
1076
01:11:16,140 --> 01:11:18,690
-** Send your camel to bed -**
1077
01:11:21,140 --> 01:11:24,640
-** Shadows painting our faces -**
1078
01:11:25,140 --> 01:11:27,640
-** Traces -**
1079
01:11:28,150 --> 01:11:31,650
-** Of romance in our heads -**
1080
01:11:32,150 --> 01:11:34,650
-** Heaven's holding a half-moon -**
1081
01:11:37,150 --> 01:11:39,650
-** Shining just for us -**
1082
01:11:42,150 --> 01:11:45,650
-** Let's slip off
to a sand dune -**
1083
01:11:46,110 --> 01:11:47,650
-** Real soon -**
1084
01:11:48,110 --> 01:11:50,650
-** And kick up a little dust -**
1085
01:11:51,110 --> 01:11:55,650
-** Come on
Cactus is our friend -**
1086
01:11:56,110 --> 01:12:00,650
-** He'll point out the way -**
1087
01:12:01,110 --> 01:12:02,610
You know, at band camp
we have dances like this,
1088
01:12:03,110 --> 01:12:05,610
only they're way funner.
1089
01:12:07,110 --> 01:12:09,610
-** Till the evening ends -**-**
1090
01:12:10,110 --> 01:12:14,610
-** Hey, hey, hey
Oooh -**
1091
01:12:20,110 --> 01:12:22,610
All right, status check.
Where do you guys stand ?
1092
01:12:24,070 --> 01:12:26,610
Finch, we know where you are,
but can't really use that as an excuse.
1093
01:12:27,070 --> 01:12:28,610
Jim ?
1094
01:12:29,070 --> 01:12:33,610
Uh, my date's a flute-toting band dork.
Does that answer your question ?
1095
01:12:34,070 --> 01:12:36,620
Oz, is this vocal-jazz shit
gonna pay off or what ?
1096
01:12:37,070 --> 01:12:39,620
Kevin, what's with
the attitude ?
1097
01:12:40,070 --> 01:12:42,620
Attitude ? Me ?
1098
01:12:43,070 --> 01:12:45,580
I think you guys should be
a little more enthusiastic.
1099
01:12:46,080 --> 01:12:47,580
This is the night
we've been waiting for.
1100
01:12:48,080 --> 01:12:50,580
We're in this together.
You guys can't back out.
1101
01:12:51,080 --> 01:12:53,580
Kev, you don't need us to get laid.
Are you afraid or something ?
1102
01:12:54,080 --> 01:12:57,580
No. Come on.
We made a pact.
1103
01:12:58,080 --> 01:13:00,580
You can't break that.
You guys are gonna have to--
1104
01:13:01,080 --> 01:13:04,580
Have to what, Kev, huh ?
I don't have to do shit.
1105
01:13:05,080 --> 01:13:08,580
Forget it already. I am so sick
and tired of all this bullshit pressure.
1106
01:13:09,040 --> 01:13:12,580
I've never even had sex, and already,
I can't stand it. I hate sex !
1107
01:13:14,040 --> 01:13:16,580
And I'm not gonna stand around here
busting my balls over something that,
1108
01:13:17,040 --> 01:13:18,580
quite frankly,
isn't that damn important.
1109
01:13:19,040 --> 01:13:20,580
I'm gonna go hang out
with that geek over there...
1110
01:13:21,040 --> 01:13:23,580
'cause at least she has something else
to talk about besides sex.
1111
01:13:24,040 --> 01:13:25,540
Goddamn.
1112
01:13:28,040 --> 01:13:30,540
Yeah.
1113
01:13:31,040 --> 01:13:33,540
You know, at least I learned
how to shit in school, buddy.
1114
01:13:35,040 --> 01:13:36,540
Hey, Finch.
1115
01:13:37,040 --> 01:13:38,540
- Wanna dance ?
- Yeah.
1116
01:13:39,040 --> 01:13:42,540
-** Oooh -**
1117
01:13:45,040 --> 01:13:47,540
- How come you have no date ?
- I like to keep my options open.
1118
01:13:48,000 --> 01:13:49,550
I got something for you.
1119
01:13:52,000 --> 01:13:54,550
Consider it
a consolation prize.
1120
01:13:58,000 --> 01:14:00,550
Jessica, this is great !
Wow !
1121
01:14:01,000 --> 01:14:04,550
- Felt sorta guilty
1122
01:14:05,010 --> 01:14:07,510
No, I spent 50 on the flask,
150 on the earrings.
1123
01:14:10,010 --> 01:14:11,510
- These are, uh--
- Let me just clarify...
1124
01:14:12,010 --> 01:14:16,510
- that you have no chance
of scoring with me, Finch. - Of course not !
1125
01:14:17,010 --> 01:14:18,510
So I take it you and Sherman
are pretty close, huh ?
1126
01:14:20,010 --> 01:14:21,510
You met at that party
a while back, right ?
1127
01:14:22,010 --> 01:14:23,510
Yeah, we were
up all night together.
1128
01:14:24,010 --> 01:14:26,510
We had one of those
amazingly deep conversations...
1129
01:14:27,010 --> 01:14:29,510
where you feel like
you really get to know someone.
1130
01:14:29,970 --> 01:14:32,510
Deep conversation, huh ?
1131
01:14:32,970 --> 01:14:34,510
Is that
what you call it ?
1132
01:14:35,970 --> 01:14:37,510
What else
would I call it ?
1133
01:14:43,970 --> 01:14:45,510
Thank you, Great Falls.
1134
01:14:45,970 --> 01:14:48,510
We're gonna take a little break.
You are beautiful.
1135
01:14:53,970 --> 01:14:55,470
You suck !
1136
01:14:58,970 --> 01:15:00,470
Excuse me, everyone.
1137
01:15:00,970 --> 01:15:02,470
Sorry to interrupt.
1138
01:15:02,970 --> 01:15:05,470
I just thought
you all should know this.
1139
01:15:05,970 --> 01:15:08,480
Chuck Sherman is a liar.
1140
01:15:08,980 --> 01:15:10,480
I never had sex with him.
1141
01:15:10,930 --> 01:15:14,480
He's never had sex with anyone.
I know this because he told me.
1142
01:15:14,930 --> 01:15:18,480
Once he tried to screw
a grapefruit, but that's all.
1143
01:15:18,940 --> 01:15:22,480
Oh. He also told me that when he gets
nervous, he sometimes wets his pants.
1144
01:15:22,940 --> 01:15:26,480
- Thank you for your time.
1145
01:15:39,940 --> 01:15:42,440
- Guess what ?
- Not interested.
1146
01:15:42,940 --> 01:15:46,440
Kevin. Come on, man. The bus
to Stifler's is gonna be here soon.
1147
01:15:46,940 --> 01:15:48,440
- I'm not going.
- What ?
1148
01:15:48,940 --> 01:15:52,440
Why not ?
1149
01:15:52,900 --> 01:15:57,440
Look, things didn't really
turn out how I wanted them to.
1150
01:15:57,900 --> 01:15:59,440
I mean, I don't even
know what I'm doing.
1151
01:15:59,900 --> 01:16:03,440
I-I'm acting like I've got
everything together tonight.
1152
01:16:03,900 --> 01:16:06,440
I know that Vicky's gonna
ask me if I love her, and...
1153
01:16:06,900 --> 01:16:08,440
I don't know
what I'm gonna say.
1154
01:16:08,900 --> 01:16:10,440
I mean,
I'm on the brink.
1155
01:16:10,900 --> 01:16:14,400
I'm just about to do it.
I should be psyched.
1156
01:16:14,900 --> 01:16:18,400
I don't know. Maybe you're right.
Maybe I am just scared.
1157
01:16:18,900 --> 01:16:22,400
Come on, Kev.
Tonight is the night.
1158
01:16:22,910 --> 01:16:26,410
We-We are finally going
to a post-prom party on the lake.
1159
01:16:26,910 --> 01:16:28,410
We have been waiting for this
for four years.
1160
01:16:28,910 --> 01:16:31,410
Why else have we been friends
with Stifler all this time, right ?
1161
01:16:32,910 --> 01:16:35,410
We were friends
with Stifler ?
1162
01:16:35,870 --> 01:16:37,410
Hey, look.
1163
01:16:38,870 --> 01:16:41,410
Sherman didn't even
get laid.
1164
01:16:41,870 --> 01:16:43,410
- He didn't ?
- No, he pissed himself.
1165
01:16:44,870 --> 01:16:46,410
- What ?
1166
01:16:47,870 --> 01:16:49,410
We'll tell you
on the bus.
1167
01:16:49,870 --> 01:16:53,410
I'm gonna go inside
and grab my bag.
1168
01:16:53,870 --> 01:16:55,370
My date too, perhaps ?
1169
01:16:57,870 --> 01:16:59,370
Stifler's mom
got it in the divorce.
1170
01:16:59,870 --> 01:17:01,370
That reminds me
of this one time--
1171
01:17:01,870 --> 01:17:04,370
Hey, can I ask you
a question ?
1172
01:17:04,870 --> 01:17:07,370
How come you don't have any stories ?
I've got lots of them,
1173
01:17:07,870 --> 01:17:09,370
and you don't have any.
1174
01:17:09,870 --> 01:17:12,370
Oh, I've got stories.
Believe me. They're just, uh--
1175
01:17:12,870 --> 01:17:15,370
They're just a little
more risque than tales of band camp.
1176
01:17:15,830 --> 01:17:20,370
Are they gross or something ?
Like guy stuff ? Tell me !
1177
01:17:20,830 --> 01:17:22,370
Okay.
You want a story ?
1178
01:17:22,830 --> 01:17:24,370
Here's a story.
Stifler finds this beer--
1179
01:17:28,830 --> 01:17:32,380
This is
the nicest room in the house. - Kev, it's perfect.
1180
01:17:43,840 --> 01:17:46,340
- You guys are gonna fuck, aren't ya ?
1181
01:17:46,840 --> 01:17:49,340
Fuckers !
Fuckers, fuckers !
1182
01:17:49,840 --> 01:17:51,340
Fuckers,
fuckers, fuckers !
1183
01:17:53,840 --> 01:17:55,340
- Out.
- Aw, come on !
1184
01:17:55,840 --> 01:17:58,340
- Get out.
- Aw, man !
1185
01:18:16,800 --> 01:18:18,300
There's something
I've been meaning to tell you, Heather.
1186
01:18:18,800 --> 01:18:20,300
What's that ?
1187
01:18:20,800 --> 01:18:23,300
It's gonna sound
really bad, but, uh,
1188
01:18:23,800 --> 01:18:25,300
I want you to know.
1189
01:18:25,800 --> 01:18:28,300
You see, uh,
1190
01:18:28,800 --> 01:18:33,300
I'm a virgin,
and, uh--
1191
01:18:33,800 --> 01:18:35,300
Well, me, Kevin, Jim
and Finch were--
1192
01:18:35,800 --> 01:18:38,300
We all made this pact...
1193
01:18:38,760 --> 01:18:41,300
that we would
lose our virginity...
1194
01:18:41,760 --> 01:18:43,300
before high school
was over,
1195
01:18:43,760 --> 01:18:46,300
and tonight is supposed
to be the night that we all do it.
1196
01:18:48,760 --> 01:18:50,310
This isn't the best way
to proposition me.
1197
01:18:50,760 --> 01:18:53,310
No, that's--
That's not what I mean.
1198
01:18:53,760 --> 01:18:56,310
W-What I mean is, uh--
1199
01:18:57,770 --> 01:18:59,270
Look, do you know
what made me leave that game ?
1200
01:18:59,770 --> 01:19:03,270
See, Coach, he was giving us
this speech about...
1201
01:19:03,770 --> 01:19:06,270
not slacking off when you see
the opportunity to score--
1202
01:19:06,770 --> 01:19:08,270
This isn't any better,
Chris.
1203
01:19:08,770 --> 01:19:10,270
No, you see--
You see, Heather,
1204
01:19:11,770 --> 01:19:13,270
what I realized is that...
1205
01:19:13,770 --> 01:19:18,270
with you, it's...
not like I'm running towards a goal...
1206
01:19:18,770 --> 01:19:21,270
Looking for
the best way to score.
1207
01:19:21,730 --> 01:19:25,270
This may sound
a little corny, but...
1208
01:19:25,730 --> 01:19:27,270
I feel like
I've already won.
1209
01:19:30,730 --> 01:19:34,270
And, uh,
I care about you a lot.
1210
01:19:35,730 --> 01:19:38,270
Oz, I know.
1211
01:19:39,730 --> 01:19:42,230
- You called me Oz.
- Well, yeah.
1212
01:19:42,730 --> 01:19:44,230
It's what your friends
call you.
1213
01:19:44,730 --> 01:19:47,230
I mean, I feel like I'm
one of your friends now.
1214
01:19:47,730 --> 01:19:51,230
And... your girlfriend ?
1215
01:19:53,730 --> 01:19:58,230
-** Ain't never thought that
I could love like this -**
1216
01:19:58,730 --> 01:20:01,240
-** This feeling inside me
is growing -**
1217
01:20:01,730 --> 01:20:06,240
-** I never thought that
you would care -**-**
1218
01:20:25,700 --> 01:20:27,200
Are ya lost ?
1219
01:20:31,700 --> 01:20:34,200
You're Stifler's mom.
Uh--
1220
01:20:34,700 --> 01:20:37,200
No, no, not lost.
Just, um,
1221
01:20:37,700 --> 01:20:39,200
you know,
taking the tour.
1222
01:20:42,700 --> 01:20:46,200
Hey, uh, thank you for letting
us have this wonderful party.
1223
01:20:46,660 --> 01:20:48,200
As if there was
an alternative in the matter.
1224
01:20:53,660 --> 01:20:56,200
So, you enjoying yourself ?
1225
01:20:56,660 --> 01:20:59,200
I'm... three sheets
to the wind, ma'am.
1226
01:20:59,660 --> 01:21:02,200
I'm so happy for you.
1227
01:21:02,660 --> 01:21:04,160
But it takes the edge off,
doesn't it ?
1228
01:21:06,660 --> 01:21:09,160
- Where's your little date tonight ?
- No date. It was--
1229
01:21:09,660 --> 01:21:11,160
It was a bathroom incident.
1230
01:21:12,660 --> 01:21:16,160
- Pardon me ?
- Never mind.
1231
01:21:20,670 --> 01:21:22,160
You have
anything to drink ?
1232
01:21:22,670 --> 01:21:24,170
I believe the kegs
are upstairs.
1233
01:21:26,620 --> 01:21:28,170
That is what
the cretins drink.
1234
01:21:28,630 --> 01:21:30,170
I'm talking about
alcohol, liquor.
1235
01:21:30,630 --> 01:21:33,170
- The good stuff.
- All right.
1236
01:21:35,630 --> 01:21:37,170
I got some scotch.
1237
01:21:37,630 --> 01:21:42,170
- Single malt ?
- Aged 18 years.
1238
01:21:42,630 --> 01:21:44,170
The way I like it.
1239
01:21:47,630 --> 01:21:50,130
Why don't you go
grab a glass from the bar ?
1240
01:21:52,630 --> 01:21:55,130
I think I should.
1241
01:21:55,630 --> 01:21:57,130
Allow me.
1242
01:21:58,630 --> 01:22:00,130
You know it's
a bitching party.
1243
01:22:00,630 --> 01:22:03,130
The Stif-man
always comes through in the clutch.
1244
01:22:06,630 --> 01:22:10,130
And then he just
puked his brains out.
1245
01:22:10,590 --> 01:22:13,130
- That is a nasty story.
- Yep, I told you.
1246
01:22:13,590 --> 01:22:15,130
Do you want to hear
a nasty story of mine ?
1247
01:22:15,590 --> 01:22:17,130
It's sort of sexual.
1248
01:22:19,590 --> 01:22:22,130
Yeah !
Yeah, let's hear it.
1249
01:22:22,590 --> 01:22:27,090
Okay, well, this one time at band camp,
we were playing this game.
1250
01:22:27,590 --> 01:22:30,090
I don't know if you know it,
but it's called "Spin the Bottle."
1251
01:22:30,590 --> 01:22:34,090
And I had to kiss this guy
named Mark Wander on the lips.
1252
01:22:34,600 --> 01:22:36,100
And-And he plays
trombone--
1253
01:22:36,590 --> 01:22:39,100
So how do you
want to be ?
1254
01:22:39,600 --> 01:22:42,100
Like... how do you
want to do it ?
1255
01:22:43,600 --> 01:22:46,100
I don't know.
How do you ?
1256
01:22:46,600 --> 01:22:51,100
Like... normal style.
The missionary position.
1257
01:22:52,560 --> 01:22:54,100
Okay.
1258
01:23:00,560 --> 01:23:03,100
Kev ?
1259
01:23:03,560 --> 01:23:05,100
- Yeah ?
- I wanna hear you say it.
1260
01:23:05,560 --> 01:23:07,100
Okay.
1261
01:23:10,560 --> 01:23:13,060
Victoria,
1262
01:23:13,560 --> 01:23:15,060
I love you.
1263
01:23:16,560 --> 01:23:19,060
I love you.
1264
01:23:30,520 --> 01:23:33,060
-** Don't stray -**
1265
01:23:33,520 --> 01:23:35,060
-** Don't ever go away -**
1266
01:23:35,520 --> 01:23:38,060
-** I should be
much too smart for this -**
1267
01:23:38,520 --> 01:23:41,060
-** You know it gets
the better of me -**
1268
01:23:41,520 --> 01:23:45,060
-** Sometimes
when you and I collide -**
1269
01:23:45,520 --> 01:23:48,070
- -** I fall into an ocean of you -**
- Oh. My hair.
1270
01:23:48,520 --> 01:23:50,020
-** Pull me out in time -**
1271
01:23:50,520 --> 01:23:52,020
- -** Don't let me drown -**
1272
01:23:52,530 --> 01:23:55,030
-** Let me down -**
1273
01:23:55,530 --> 01:23:57,030
You okay ?
1274
01:23:57,530 --> 01:24:01,030
Yeah. Go slow.
1275
01:24:01,530 --> 01:24:04,030
-** Say you'll stay -**
1276
01:24:04,530 --> 01:24:07,030
-** Don't come and go -**
1277
01:24:07,530 --> 01:24:09,030
-** Like you do -**
1278
01:24:11,530 --> 01:24:14,030
-** Sway my way -**
1279
01:24:14,490 --> 01:24:17,030
-** Yeah, I need to know -**
1280
01:24:17,490 --> 01:24:20,030
-** All about you -**
1281
01:24:21,490 --> 01:24:24,030
-** Say you'll stay -**-**
1282
01:24:24,490 --> 01:24:27,030
So the end of the story
is you...
1283
01:24:27,490 --> 01:24:29,030
had to kiss the guy
for 20 seconds.
1284
01:24:29,490 --> 01:24:32,990
Yes ! And he was such a dork.
Everyone laughed at me...
1285
01:24:33,490 --> 01:24:36,990
- but I didn't care
because it was so funny. - I get it.
1286
01:24:37,490 --> 01:24:40,990
And this one time at band camp,
I stuck a flute in my pussy.
1287
01:24:41,490 --> 01:24:42,990
Hmm.
1288
01:24:43,490 --> 01:24:44,990
Excuse me ?
1289
01:24:45,490 --> 01:24:47,990
What ? You don't think I know
how to get myself off ?
1290
01:24:48,490 --> 01:24:51,990
Hell, that's what
half of band camp is-- Sex Ed.
1291
01:24:52,490 --> 01:24:54,990
So are we gonna screw soon,
'cause I'm getting kinda antsy.
1292
01:25:04,450 --> 01:25:06,000
This'll do. Whoo-hoo !
1293
01:25:08,450 --> 01:25:12,000
Ow !
1294
01:25:12,460 --> 01:25:13,960
Now, I have two rubbers.
Wear them both. It'll desensitize you.
1295
01:25:14,460 --> 01:25:16,960
Now, I have two rubbers.
Wear them both. It'll desensitize you.
1296
01:25:17,460 --> 01:25:18,960
I don't want you coming
so damn early this time.
1297
01:25:21,460 --> 01:25:23,960
What makes you think
that I would come early ?
1298
01:25:24,460 --> 01:25:27,960
Come on. I saw you on the 'Net.
Why do you think I accepted this date ?
1299
01:25:28,460 --> 01:25:30,960
- You're a sure thing.
1300
01:25:33,460 --> 01:25:35,960
Yes, I am.
1301
01:25:36,420 --> 01:25:39,960
So I said, "This is very obviously
a Piero della Francesca."
1302
01:25:40,420 --> 01:25:42,960
Hmm.
1303
01:25:48,420 --> 01:25:52,960
So, uh, would you object if I said
that you were quite striking ?
1304
01:25:53,420 --> 01:25:57,920
Mr. Finch, are you
trying to seduce me ?
1305
01:25:58,420 --> 01:26:00,920
- Yes, ma'am, I am.
- -** And here's to you -**
1306
01:26:01,420 --> 01:26:02,920
-** Mrs. Robinson -**
1307
01:26:03,420 --> 01:26:06,920
-** Jesus loves you more
than you will know -**
1308
01:26:07,420 --> 01:26:09,920
-** Whoa, whoa, whoa -**
1309
01:26:10,420 --> 01:26:12,920
-** Stand up tall, Mrs. Robinson -**
1310
01:26:13,420 --> 01:26:16,920
- Mmm, you're dead.
- -** God in heaven smiles on those who pray -**
1311
01:26:17,380 --> 01:26:19,930
-** Hey, hey, hey -**
1312
01:26:20,380 --> 01:26:21,930
- -** Hey, hey, hey -**-**
1313
01:26:22,380 --> 01:26:23,930
- -** Hey, hey, hey -**-**
1314
01:26:24,380 --> 01:26:26,930
-** Sway my way -**
1315
01:26:27,390 --> 01:26:29,930
-** Yeah, I need to know -**
1316
01:26:30,390 --> 01:26:32,930
-** All about you -**
1317
01:26:33,390 --> 01:26:35,930
-** And there's no cure -**
1318
01:26:36,390 --> 01:26:38,890
-** And no way to be sure -**
1319
01:26:39,390 --> 01:26:40,890
-** Why everything's
turned inside out -**
1320
01:26:41,390 --> 01:26:42,890
-** Instilling so much doubt -**
1321
01:26:43,390 --> 01:26:45,890
-** It makes me so tired -**
1322
01:26:46,390 --> 01:26:48,890
-** I feel so uninspired -**
1323
01:26:49,390 --> 01:26:50,890
-** My head is battling
with my heart -**
1324
01:26:51,390 --> 01:26:54,890
-** My logic has been torn apart
And now -**-**
1325
01:26:55,390 --> 01:26:57,890
I had no idea you'd be this good.
Neither did I.
1326
01:26:58,350 --> 01:26:59,890
Oh, Finchy. Finch.
1327
01:27:00,350 --> 01:27:02,890
- Oh, Stifler's mom, whoa !
- Finchy !
1328
01:27:09,350 --> 01:27:11,890
- Okay, let's go.
1329
01:27:12,350 --> 01:27:14,890
What's my name ?
Say my name, bitch !
1330
01:27:15,350 --> 01:27:16,890
Michelle, Michelle.
1331
01:27:18,350 --> 01:27:19,850
Oh, God.
1332
01:27:48,320 --> 01:27:49,860
That was
a great night, huh ?
1333
01:27:52,320 --> 01:27:53,860
Yeah.
1334
01:27:56,320 --> 01:27:58,860
I mean, I just can't believe
we had our senior prom.
1335
01:27:59,320 --> 01:28:02,820
I know.
It went by so fast.
1336
01:28:03,320 --> 01:28:05,820
Yeah, it did.
1337
01:28:06,320 --> 01:28:07,820
Kevin ?
1338
01:28:13,320 --> 01:28:14,820
Next year with you
going to Ann Arbor...
1339
01:28:15,320 --> 01:28:17,820
and me going to Ithaca,
1340
01:28:19,320 --> 01:28:21,820
it's not gonna work,
is it ?
1341
01:28:22,280 --> 01:28:23,820
No.
Don't say that.
1342
01:28:24,280 --> 01:28:25,820
I mean,
we could make it work.
1343
01:28:28,280 --> 01:28:29,820
- It'll be perfect.
- No, Kevin.
1344
01:28:32,280 --> 01:28:33,820
-But--
-See, that's what I've been realizing...
1345
01:28:35,280 --> 01:28:36,820
is that...
nothing's perfect.
1346
01:28:37,280 --> 01:28:41,780
And you can't
plan everything.
1347
01:28:42,280 --> 01:28:45,780
Well, I guess... you will
be pretty far away.
1348
01:28:47,280 --> 01:28:49,790
And we'll be on our own,
meeting new people.
1349
01:28:54,290 --> 01:28:55,790
Last night, though.
1350
01:29:00,290 --> 01:29:02,790
I wasn't lying.
1351
01:29:04,250 --> 01:29:05,790
I know.
1352
01:29:22,250 --> 01:29:24,750
She's gone.
Wha--
1353
01:29:25,250 --> 01:29:26,750
Oh, my God.
She used me.
1354
01:29:28,250 --> 01:29:28,750
I was used.
1355
01:29:31,250 --> 01:29:34,750
I was used.
Cool !
1356
01:29:37,250 --> 01:29:38,750
What's this door locked--
1357
01:29:39,250 --> 01:29:40,750
Mom, where's--
1358
01:29:43,250 --> 01:29:46,750
- Mom ? Shit-brick ?
- Hey, Stifler.
1359
01:29:49,210 --> 01:29:52,750
-** Do do do do do do do -**
1360
01:29:53,210 --> 01:29:55,760
I just gotta say that women,
1361
01:29:56,210 --> 01:29:58,760
Like a fine wine,
only get better with age.
1362
01:30:00,210 --> 01:30:02,760
Of course, I have
no basis for comparison, but, uh,
1363
01:30:04,220 --> 01:30:04,710
it was good.
1364
01:30:06,210 --> 01:30:07,720
So you almost made it,
huh, Oz ?
1365
01:30:08,220 --> 01:30:11,720
- I'll just say that
we had a great night together. - Hang in there, buddy.
1366
01:30:12,220 --> 01:30:16,720
- You'll get there.
- You know, guys, I think we're falling in love.
1367
01:30:17,220 --> 01:30:20,720
Wha--
Wow.
1368
01:30:21,220 --> 01:30:22,720
That's great, man.
That's awesome.
1369
01:30:25,220 --> 01:30:26,720
Y-You know what
the coolest thing is, guys ?
1370
01:30:27,180 --> 01:30:29,720
This.
You know, right now.
1371
01:30:30,180 --> 01:30:32,720
It's true. I mean, after this,
everything's gonna be different.
1372
01:30:33,180 --> 01:30:36,720
After... getting laid ?
1373
01:30:37,180 --> 01:30:39,720
- After high school.
- Here's to the next step.
1374
01:30:40,180 --> 01:30:42,720
- To the next step.
- To the next step. - To the next step.
1375
01:31:33,150 --> 01:31:34,650
- Sweetheart ?
1375
01:31:35,305 --> 01:31:41,211
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