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1
00:00:01,169 --> 00:00:02,503
["The Ballad Of
Gilligan's Island"]
2
00:00:02,570 --> 00:00:05,239
* Just sit right back
and you'll hear a tale *
3
00:00:05,306 --> 00:00:07,341
* A tale of a fateful trip *
4
00:00:07,408 --> 00:00:09,843
* That started
from this tropic port *
5
00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:11,745
* Aboard this tiny ship *
6
00:00:11,812 --> 00:00:14,315
* The mate was
a mighty sailin' man *
7
00:00:14,382 --> 00:00:16,617
* The Skipper brave and sure *
8
00:00:16,684 --> 00:00:19,120
* Five passengers
set sail that day *
9
00:00:19,187 --> 00:00:21,322
* For a three hour tour *
10
00:00:21,389 --> 00:00:24,158
* A three hour tour *
11
00:00:24,225 --> 00:00:26,160
[thunder rumbles]
12
00:00:26,227 --> 00:00:28,562
* The weather started
getting rough *
13
00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:30,664
* The tiny ship was tossed *
14
00:00:30,731 --> 00:00:33,467
* If not for the courage
of the fearless crew *
15
00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:35,336
* The Minnow would be lost *
16
00:00:35,403 --> 00:00:37,638
* The Minnow would be lost *
17
00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:39,773
* The ship set ground
on the shore *
18
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,710
* Of this uncharted
desert isle *
19
00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:44,912
* With Gilligan *
20
00:00:44,978 --> 00:00:47,115
* The Skipper too *
21
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:49,317
* The millionaire *
22
00:00:49,383 --> 00:00:51,752
* And his wife *
23
00:00:51,819 --> 00:00:54,588
* The movie star *
24
00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:56,557
* And the rest *
25
00:00:56,624 --> 00:01:00,428
* Are here on Gilligan's Isle *
26
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,579
Don't let him get away,
Gilligan.
27
00:01:18,646 --> 00:01:21,215
I won't, Skipper.
28
00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:23,717
Give him some slack.
29
00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:27,355
Play with him, Gilligan.
That's it, play with him.
30
00:01:28,389 --> 00:01:30,224
What a fighter he is.
31
00:01:31,259 --> 00:01:33,227
He must weigh 50 pounds.
32
00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:38,566
- I don't believe it.
- It's okay, come on.
33
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:41,101
Open up your mouth and give me
back the sea shell.
34
00:01:42,870 --> 00:01:44,138
Thank you.
35
00:01:45,773 --> 00:01:47,541
Okay now, oops, here we go.
36
00:01:47,608 --> 00:01:50,077
- Back to school, Irwin.
- Irwin?
37
00:01:50,144 --> 00:01:52,446
Yeah. He get's real mad
if I call him "Irw."
38
00:01:52,513 --> 00:01:53,914
- Naturally.
- Yeah.
39
00:01:53,981 --> 00:01:57,117
He and I are good friends.
I catch him almost every day.
40
00:01:59,853 --> 00:02:01,989
Hey, what's that?
41
00:02:02,055 --> 00:02:03,857
It's a guy on a surf board.
42
00:02:04,825 --> 00:02:06,527
A guy on a surf board?
43
00:02:21,575 --> 00:02:23,977
Gilligan, what is it
you're trying to do?
44
00:02:24,044 --> 00:02:25,313
Artificial respiration.
45
00:02:25,379 --> 00:02:27,147
What? He hasn't swallowed
any water yet.
46
00:02:27,215 --> 00:02:29,817
Maybe, a little sand
the way you've got him.
47
00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:31,352
May I?
48
00:02:32,853 --> 00:02:36,290
Alright, boy, roll over.
You're alright.
49
00:02:37,225 --> 00:02:39,460
Come on, son, you're alright.
50
00:02:39,527 --> 00:02:43,297
You're okay. Don't try and talk
now. Just lie there and rest.
51
00:02:43,364 --> 00:02:44,832
Hey, Professor. Look
what we found?
52
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:46,834
I was in a tree
getting some dates
53
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,602
I saw him come ashore.
54
00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:50,238
Who is he?
55
00:02:51,038 --> 00:02:52,706
Who are you?
56
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:54,842
- Duke Williams.
- Where you from?
57
00:02:54,908 --> 00:02:57,745
- Topeka, Kansas.
- Wow, he sure had a long ride.
58
00:02:57,811 --> 00:02:59,647
No, no, no, I mean
where did you start from?
59
00:02:59,713 --> 00:03:03,484
Oh, oh, I caught a 30-foot one
off Waimea beach.
60
00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:06,454
Waimea beach!
But that's near Honolulu.
61
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,489
Duke, it is scientifically
absurd to believe that
62
00:03:08,556 --> 00:03:10,824
you could've ridden the same
wave all the way from Hawaii.
63
00:03:10,891 --> 00:03:13,126
The counter-action of the marine
gravitational force would've--
64
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:16,264
Slow down, Teachs. I was
a dropout from second grade.
65
00:03:16,330 --> 00:03:18,432
- I got to slow down.
- Don't go nowhere, man.
66
00:03:18,499 --> 00:03:21,269
Just stay where you are,
listen to Big Daddy.
67
00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:22,970
Now, there was
a large surf makin' up
68
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:25,439
and me and couple other
hot-doggers were practicin'
69
00:03:25,506 --> 00:03:27,608
rail-grabs and kick-outs.
70
00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:30,043
Like one Joe is a grimmy,
he wipes out at the start.
71
00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:32,480
Me, I'm in a nose, right,
havin' a little trouble
72
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:36,149
when all of a sudden, I'm out
of the tube and up on top.
73
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,951
Only, I'm headed
for open sea.
74
00:03:38,018 --> 00:03:42,089
I mean, I'm ridin' into the
middle of the big salty splash.
75
00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:43,123
You got the picture?
76
00:03:43,190 --> 00:03:44,492
Must've been
a foreign film.
77
00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:46,394
Let's start
from the beginning.
78
00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:48,429
How long have you been
on that board?
79
00:03:48,496 --> 00:03:50,798
- What day this is?
- Thursday.
80
00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:53,834
I remember swingin' with this
gidget Saturday night.
81
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:56,704
And then giving her a fast
goodbye so me and the guys
82
00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:58,872
could hit the beach
Sunday morning.
83
00:03:58,939 --> 00:04:01,275
That was five days ago.
84
00:04:01,342 --> 00:04:02,943
Say, you're right.
85
00:04:03,010 --> 00:04:06,013
Professor, he couldn't have been
out more than two or three hours
86
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:08,516
His friends are probably out
looking for him right now.
87
00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:10,751
Unless he rode in
on a tsunami.
88
00:04:10,818 --> 00:04:13,821
No, he came in on a board.
Skipper and I saw him.
89
00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:16,724
Tsunami is a giant wave caused
by an underground earthquake
90
00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:19,827
originating in a seismological
fault off the coast of Japan.
91
00:04:19,893 --> 00:04:21,995
(Duke)
'Is anybody gonna tell me
where I am?'
92
00:04:22,062 --> 00:04:25,032
Duke, I'm afraid you're marooned
on an uncharted island.
93
00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:27,901
Not for long, pops.
94
00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:31,505
Give me a couple days,
and I'm back to Waimea.
95
00:04:31,572 --> 00:04:34,908
We'll fatten you up and put you
on the next tsunami to Hawaii.
96
00:04:34,975 --> 00:04:36,444
And when you get there
97
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:38,278
don't forget to tell them
we're marooned here.
98
00:04:38,346 --> 00:04:40,781
Alright.
99
00:04:40,848 --> 00:04:44,852
Professor, a reverse tsunami,
is that possible?
100
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:46,186
Not a chance, Skipper.
101
00:04:46,253 --> 00:04:49,923
Ah, that figures, why else would
Gilligan have thought of it.
102
00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:52,560
So, that's the way we ended up
on this island.
103
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:54,127
Man, how do you stand it?
104
00:04:54,194 --> 00:04:56,364
It's a little rough
the first couple months
105
00:04:56,430 --> 00:04:57,898
but you'll get used to it.
106
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,401
Get used to it. I'll go ape.
107
00:05:00,468 --> 00:05:02,002
Just gotta get back
to Hawaii.
108
00:05:02,069 --> 00:05:05,172
Duke, let me tell you something.
There is no way off this island.
109
00:05:05,238 --> 00:05:08,642
Admiral, there are no strings
on a man with a surfboard.
110
00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:11,011
All I gotta do
is get back in shape.
111
00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:15,449
Five days on that board, and
I'm nothin' but skin and bones.
112
00:05:15,516 --> 00:05:17,050
And what skin.
113
00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:20,320
And what bones.
114
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:23,691
Ladies, come on in.
115
00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:26,694
Man, you guys ain't lost,
you're hiding.
116
00:05:28,862 --> 00:05:32,332
Duke Williams, this is Ginger
Grant and Mary Ann Summers.
117
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:35,035
- Hello.
- Howdy.
118
00:05:35,102 --> 00:05:37,037
Pleasure's mine.
119
00:05:37,104 --> 00:05:39,673
Gilligan was out fishing,
and this is what we landed.
120
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:42,342
Wow, what did you
use for bait?
121
00:05:44,512 --> 00:05:47,481
Stop dreaming.
The Duke has arrived.
122
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:52,986
Oh, I like 'em little,
and I like' em big.
123
00:05:54,622 --> 00:05:57,057
Man, this is smorgasbroad time.
124
00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:02,095
- Did you say "Duke?"
- Yeah, Duke.
125
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:05,866
- Oh, darling, royalty.
- At last, our kind of people.
126
00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:08,769
I better start over. This Duke
Williams was surfing in Hawaii--
127
00:06:08,836 --> 00:06:10,871
Thurston, where did we meet
the Duke of Williams?
128
00:06:10,938 --> 00:06:12,473
Skeet shooting
with Prince Philip?
129
00:06:12,540 --> 00:06:15,108
No, that was
the Duke of Albania.
130
00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:18,579
- A-at Monaco with Grace--
- That was the Duke of Troy.
131
00:06:18,646 --> 00:06:20,714
- Can I say something?
- 'No, no, Gilligan.'
132
00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:23,250
No time for idle chat and not
with a Duke on the island.
133
00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:26,687
The Duke's first day, we must
have him for cocktail.
134
00:06:26,754 --> 00:06:31,124
Oh, Thurston. Oh, it's the right
thing at the right time.
135
00:06:31,191 --> 00:06:34,828
No wonder you're always sitting
on the host's right hand.
136
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:36,697
Isn't that kind
of uncomfortable?
137
00:06:36,764 --> 00:06:39,567
She is proud of, my boy. Mustn't
keep the Duke in suspense.
138
00:06:39,633 --> 00:06:41,735
Let him know
the Howells are here.
139
00:06:44,104 --> 00:06:48,976
- Took second place in Waikiki.
- Oh, wow, who took first prize?
140
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:51,011
The guy who was married
to the judge.
141
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,080
Oh, dear, you're just
not appreciated.
142
00:06:53,146 --> 00:06:56,016
Baby, isn't that
what I always say.
143
00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:59,419
Lady wanted to do a sculpture
of me like this, once.
144
00:06:59,487 --> 00:07:01,555
Oh, wow. That's you, Duke,
that's you.
145
00:07:01,622 --> 00:07:04,925
Oh, I-I was once painted
like this..
146
00:07:04,992 --> 00:07:08,161
Say, pretty good set
of deltoids.
147
00:07:08,228 --> 00:07:09,763
He likes my deltoids.
148
00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:14,835
Hmm, oh, pretty good
latissimus dorsi.
149
00:07:14,902 --> 00:07:18,238
- He likes my latissimus dorsi.
- Whatever that is!
150
00:07:18,305 --> 00:07:20,073
- You don't know?
- No.
151
00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:22,776
Why, that's right here.
152
00:07:22,843 --> 00:07:25,813
I remember hot-dogging off
the coast of Malibu one time.
153
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:28,415
Suddenly, the surf went out,
and we were on the beach.
154
00:07:28,482 --> 00:07:31,685
Well, this wahini lays eyes
on me, but I give her nothing.
155
00:07:31,752 --> 00:07:33,687
I mean, I stand like
she's nowhere
156
00:07:33,754 --> 00:07:35,723
but she comes on strong.
157
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,726
She won't hold off, but I'm
cool, reach for the surf..
158
00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:42,796
Did I hurt you?
159
00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:45,365
Little man, you couldn't knock
a hole in the wind
160
00:07:45,432 --> 00:07:47,568
with a fistful of hammers.
161
00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:51,605
- Ooh!
- Ooh!
162
00:07:57,077 --> 00:07:59,547
Well, just don't lay there,
do something.
163
00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:01,048
Anything!
164
00:08:01,549 --> 00:08:03,150
Oh, boy.
165
00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:06,019
Hey, has anybody seen
the Skipper?
166
00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:09,022
You remember the Skipper,
don't you? He kinda wears a hat?
167
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:11,892
He's got one big muscle
right about here.
168
00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:18,198
Oh, well, so long.
169
00:08:20,033 --> 00:08:21,602
Goodbye.
170
00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,638
See you later.
171
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:37,450
- Gilligan, what are you doing?
- Hi, Skipper.
172
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,519
Huh, that is not
the answer.
173
00:08:39,587 --> 00:08:41,321
Huh, I'm trying
to look like Duke.
174
00:08:41,388 --> 00:08:43,924
He's down at the beach
with Ginger and Mary Ann.
175
00:08:43,991 --> 00:08:46,694
He's doing this, Skipper,
and these girls are like "ooh."
176
00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:49,096
You're not going to get anywhere
with empty coconut shell.
177
00:08:49,162 --> 00:08:52,465
I'm starting with those
to work up to the big stuff.
178
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:55,736
Okay, little buddy, good luck.
Let me know how you make out.
179
00:08:55,803 --> 00:08:57,871
You won't recognize me
when I'm all done.
180
00:08:57,938 --> 00:09:01,208
I'll be as big as this and have
shoulders as big as this
181
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,711
and I'll have a chest
as big as that.
182
00:09:03,777 --> 00:09:06,346
Except they'd be up
a little higher.
183
00:09:06,413 --> 00:09:10,283
- Thanks a lot, Gilligan.
- Oh, I'm sorry, Skipper.
184
00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:12,152
Skipper?
185
00:09:13,420 --> 00:09:15,555
[music]
186
00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:21,895
Alright, girls, go.
187
00:09:23,864 --> 00:09:28,568
'Help somebody, help anybody
big, help!'
188
00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:30,871
- Excuse me, girls.
- 'Help.'
189
00:09:30,938 --> 00:09:32,806
Help!
190
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:37,310
Gilligan, that's no way
to do a back press.
191
00:09:38,646 --> 00:09:40,681
Is that what
I was trying to do?
192
00:09:40,748 --> 00:09:43,851
Yes. Now watch me.
193
00:09:45,786 --> 00:09:47,788
It's very simple.
194
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,327
(Duke)
'See?'
195
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:58,866
Now you try.
196
00:09:59,767 --> 00:10:01,702
Don't hurt yourself.
197
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:08,742
Lie down...on your back.
198
00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:13,180
That's it.
199
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,181
You got it?
200
00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:15,783
Yeah, yeah.
201
00:10:20,888 --> 00:10:24,725
- Oh, oh.
- Man, you just don't listen.
202
00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:26,159
Then you better give up.
203
00:10:26,226 --> 00:10:28,461
You got to have a body
to do that.
204
00:10:28,528 --> 00:10:32,532
- I got a body, sort of.
- Ah, here, keep practicing.
205
00:10:32,599 --> 00:10:33,867
Let's go, girls.
206
00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:35,669
Oh, you're not gonna
leave me here.
207
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:39,139
Oh, he's gonna leave me.
He, oh, oh.
208
00:10:39,206 --> 00:10:41,041
Oh, oh.
209
00:10:48,882 --> 00:10:51,318
[knock on door]
210
00:10:51,384 --> 00:10:52,886
Entrer.
211
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:57,257
- Oh, welcome, Your Highness.
- Duke.
212
00:10:59,226 --> 00:11:01,995
What's wrong, lady,
you lose something?
213
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:05,132
Ah, Your Highness, I-I don't
think we've ever met before?
214
00:11:05,198 --> 00:11:07,067
Now, we do mingle with royalty
215
00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:10,070
especially during grouse-hunting
season. There you are, my dear.
216
00:11:10,137 --> 00:11:12,005
Man, these nuts
come in mixed pairs.
217
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:14,241
Oh, such a droll
sense of humor.
218
00:11:14,307 --> 00:11:16,276
Yes, Thurston, that's what
I thought at first.
219
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:18,846
But have we known a Duke
that looked like that?
220
00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:21,181
Can't say much
for the cut of his clothes.
221
00:11:21,248 --> 00:11:23,984
Probably new Italian style,
pizza shock skin.
222
00:11:24,051 --> 00:11:25,886
Met some oddballs
in my time
223
00:11:25,953 --> 00:11:28,188
but like you, they let out
a little early.
224
00:11:28,255 --> 00:11:30,858
Don't go away.
I'll get the keeper.
225
00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:33,060
I don't remember any Duke
acting that badly.
226
00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:35,729
Not since the one
that started World War I.
227
00:11:35,796 --> 00:11:38,465
Sir, I think
you're an imposter.
228
00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:40,033
I am not,
I'm a surfer.
229
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:43,103
I don't think you're a Duke,
not even a Count or Earl.
230
00:11:43,170 --> 00:11:44,905
I don't even think
you're a Republican.
231
00:11:44,972 --> 00:11:47,908
Charlie, I'm going.
You're gone.
232
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:52,813
Thurston, you were superb.
233
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:55,849
Well, no one can pull the wool
over my eyes.
234
00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:58,819
Cashmere maybe,
but wool never.
235
00:12:01,621 --> 00:12:02,890
- 182..
- ...183..
236
00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:04,792
- ...184..
- Duke, Duke.
237
00:12:04,858 --> 00:12:06,426
I've been looking
all over for you.
238
00:12:06,493 --> 00:12:09,262
I'm not hard to find, Teach,
just look for my lovebirds.
239
00:12:09,329 --> 00:12:10,530
- I've got wonderful news.
- Oh.
240
00:12:10,597 --> 00:12:11,664
[Gilligan moaning]
241
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,666
Gilligan, what's wrong with you?
242
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,368
- I've been exercising.
- Why?
243
00:12:15,435 --> 00:12:17,037
So I can die healthy.
244
00:12:17,104 --> 00:12:19,907
Stay right here, I've got news
that will brighten up your life.
245
00:12:19,973 --> 00:12:21,942
- Can I lie down and listen?
- Of course.
246
00:12:22,009 --> 00:12:24,244
Duke, listen. I've been working
on this all day.
247
00:12:24,311 --> 00:12:27,047
There's been a shift in trade
winds and the tidal forces
248
00:12:27,114 --> 00:12:30,083
compounded by the pull of Sun
causing syzygy with Earth
249
00:12:30,150 --> 00:12:33,320
and made a perfect
coriolis effect.
250
00:12:33,386 --> 00:12:37,290
- Why didn't I think of that?
- Isn't he wonderful?
251
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:38,591
It's really very simple.
252
00:12:38,658 --> 00:12:42,395
The tsunami wave will return
in 48 hours headed for Hawaii.
253
00:12:42,462 --> 00:12:45,032
Hey, Duke, that means
you can get us all rescued.
254
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,767
Yeah, we gotta talk
about that sometime.
255
00:12:47,835 --> 00:12:49,970
Come on, girls,
let's take a walk.
256
00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:53,306
Right this way.
257
00:12:55,843 --> 00:12:57,677
Come on, Gilligan,
snap out of this.
258
00:12:57,744 --> 00:13:00,948
Now listen, we've got exactly
48 hours to get him into shape.
259
00:13:01,014 --> 00:13:02,782
We've got to get sugar
into his bloodstream.
260
00:13:02,850 --> 00:13:04,551
We've got to strengthen
his muscles--
261
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,353
- Professor, Professor..
- What?
262
00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:10,057
While we are building him up,
they're knocking him down.
263
00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:15,028
[peppy music]
264
00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:32,412
[music continues]
265
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:52,532
Gilligan, Gilligan,
are you down there?
266
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:56,870
You are down there, you..
267
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,154
(Gilligan coughing)
268
00:14:14,221 --> 00:14:17,390
May I ask you a simple question,
and I want a simple answer?
269
00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:19,759
Sure, Skipper,
that's only kind I know.
270
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:23,830
Exactly. Now here's my question.
Just what are you trying to do?
271
00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:25,198
I'm trying to learn how to surf
272
00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:29,502
because if I learn how to surf,
we can be rescued.
273
00:14:29,569 --> 00:14:31,338
Little buddy, your heart's
in the right place.
274
00:14:31,404 --> 00:14:33,240
About your head,
I don't know.
275
00:14:33,306 --> 00:14:35,308
It takes years to master
one of these.
276
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,444
Get off
before you hurt yourself.
277
00:14:37,510 --> 00:14:39,079
Aye aye, sir.
278
00:14:49,522 --> 00:14:51,224
Oh, Duke, you scared me.
279
00:14:51,291 --> 00:14:53,560
Baby, that's not what
I had in mind.
280
00:14:53,626 --> 00:14:54,894
Oh.
281
00:14:54,962 --> 00:14:57,197
In fact, I've had other things
on my mind
282
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,099
ever since I set eyes on you.
283
00:14:59,166 --> 00:15:00,867
Well, wh-where's Mary Ann?
284
00:15:00,934 --> 00:15:03,570
Baby, we don't need
a cheering section.
285
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:05,305
I do, I'm an actress.
286
00:15:05,372 --> 00:15:07,874
Listen, I've heard about you
movie chicks playing it cool
287
00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:10,377
but aren't you carrying
it a little far?
288
00:15:10,443 --> 00:15:14,114
- What do you mean "far?"
- I'm talking about life, baby.
289
00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:16,883
Now, you take one
long-legged redhead
290
00:15:16,950 --> 00:15:20,020
mixed with tall, handsome,
muscle man
291
00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:23,456
shake well and..
292
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:24,257
[chuckles]
293
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:25,892
You got pretty good reflexes.
294
00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:27,961
From Hollywood, I've
been chased by the best.
295
00:15:29,162 --> 00:15:31,098
Until you've been
caught by me.
296
00:15:32,532 --> 00:15:35,035
Baby, this is not supposed
to be a track meet.
297
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:39,506
Come on, Ginger.
Time for fun and games.
298
00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:46,079
- What's wrong?
- Duke.
299
00:15:46,146 --> 00:15:48,548
Oh, nothing wrong
with him.
300
00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:49,682
Believe me, Mary Ann.
301
00:15:49,749 --> 00:15:51,518
While we've been admiring
his muscles
302
00:15:51,584 --> 00:15:52,819
we overlooked his fangs.
303
00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:54,587
Fangs?
304
00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:58,025
Yeah, underneath that bronze
skin beats the heart of a wolf.
305
00:15:58,091 --> 00:15:59,726
Well, Ginger, maybe
you're too glamorous.
306
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:00,960
Take me.
307
00:16:01,028 --> 00:16:03,263
I'm more like the girl
who lives next door.
308
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:05,132
Girl next door, across
the street, around the corner
309
00:16:05,198 --> 00:16:06,499
wouldn't make
any difference to him.
310
00:16:06,566 --> 00:16:10,670
Oh, please, he's so tall
and handsome and--
311
00:16:10,737 --> 00:16:12,639
And hungry.
312
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:14,007
Where are you going?
313
00:16:14,074 --> 00:16:15,308
Think I hear
Duke calling.
314
00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:17,044
- And you're going?
- Why, certainly.
315
00:16:17,110 --> 00:16:19,579
Good luck.
316
00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:21,014
[sighs]
317
00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:26,419
[sighs]
318
00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:35,162
[clock ticks]
319
00:16:42,369 --> 00:16:44,171
Not bad time
for a little girl.
320
00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:45,772
Oh, King Kong had
a better approach.
321
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:49,309
Come on, Ginger, help me move
the chair in front of the door..
322
00:16:49,376 --> 00:16:51,411
He'll huff and puff
and blow our house down.
323
00:16:51,478 --> 00:16:53,646
We have to do something
to discourage him.
324
00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:56,449
Discourage him? He'd consider
a slap in the face applause. No.
325
00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,751
We've got to bring this
to a higher court.
326
00:16:58,818 --> 00:17:00,287
Mrs. Howell.
327
00:17:01,554 --> 00:17:04,591
Hello, Lovey, my dear.
Why the knitted brow?
328
00:17:04,657 --> 00:17:06,893
Thurston, the girls came
to me with a problem
329
00:17:06,959 --> 00:17:09,362
and I must confess,
I find it very perplexing.
330
00:17:09,429 --> 00:17:10,897
No matter what,
they deserve it.
331
00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:14,267
We're trying to figure how to
get Mr. America on surfboard
332
00:17:14,334 --> 00:17:16,369
and they're doing everything
but give him the keys
333
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:19,306
to the sorority house,
if he'll stay.
334
00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:21,374
'Girls want him
to leave too.'
335
00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:23,110
You mean, they've become
disenchanted
336
00:17:23,176 --> 00:17:25,378
with that side of beef?
337
00:17:25,445 --> 00:17:28,748
Thurston, I don't know how
to phrase this, but..
338
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:30,283
...he's been making advances.
339
00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:32,352
You mean, to both
of them at once?
340
00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:35,455
- Ooh, how vulgar!
- Yes, and how young.
341
00:17:35,522 --> 00:17:37,724
You know something, that
Duke Williams reminds me
342
00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:40,593
of Montmorency Vandergrift.
343
00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,962
Thurston, Montmorency wasn't
as bad as all that.
344
00:17:43,029 --> 00:17:44,897
Well, he did sit
a good horse
345
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:46,533
but nowadays,
that's not quite enough.
346
00:17:46,599 --> 00:17:49,402
Well, anyway, I got rid of him
once and for all.
347
00:17:49,469 --> 00:17:52,105
Lovey, my dear, I know
that we made a pledge.
348
00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:54,307
Never to delve into our past
349
00:17:54,374 --> 00:17:56,109
but I think
we should break it
350
00:17:56,176 --> 00:17:59,246
just this once
for the good of all.
351
00:17:59,312 --> 00:18:03,783
- What past, darling?
- Your past, just this once.
352
00:18:03,850 --> 00:18:06,786
I really don't think I know
what you're talking about.
353
00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:09,722
Tell me, what underhanded trick
did you use
354
00:18:09,789 --> 00:18:13,059
to get rid
of Montmorency Vandergrift?
355
00:18:13,126 --> 00:18:14,694
[both chuckle]
356
00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:17,264
Professor, somehow, someway,
we've got to get Duke
357
00:18:17,330 --> 00:18:18,731
on that surfboard tomorrow.
358
00:18:18,798 --> 00:18:20,800
We've got to offer him
something more attractive
359
00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:22,269
than Ginger and Mary Ann.
360
00:18:22,335 --> 00:18:25,705
How about a motorcycle
and a crash helmet, huh?
361
00:18:25,772 --> 00:18:28,541
We must have a talk
about the birds and the bees.
362
00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,377
What would Duke want
with birds and bees?
363
00:18:30,443 --> 00:18:33,580
- Some other time.
- Gentlemen.
364
00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:36,583
Wynken, Blynken,
and Nod still stuck
365
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:40,052
blocked by a simple problem.
Huh, poor shame.
366
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,489
And I suppose that
you have it all solved.
367
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:44,324
Naturally, you think
that country bumpkin
368
00:18:44,391 --> 00:18:46,393
is any match
for Thurston Howell III?
369
00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:48,094
I bet it's sneaky
and complicated.
370
00:18:48,161 --> 00:18:49,562
Sneaky, naturally.
371
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:52,232
But complicated,
let me tell you something.
372
00:18:52,299 --> 00:18:55,235
It's as simple as taking
candy away from a baby.
373
00:18:55,302 --> 00:18:57,170
It's elementary.
374
00:18:58,205 --> 00:18:59,872
- Hello, captain.
- Hi, Duke.
375
00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:02,008
Hey, she really waxes up good.
376
00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:03,510
Ah, no rush, Daddy-O.
377
00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:07,647
I might be in shape for a little
exercise in a week or two.
378
00:19:07,714 --> 00:19:08,881
A week or two?
379
00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:12,385
Oh, but there's a big wave
tomorrow at 7, that tsunami!
380
00:19:12,452 --> 00:19:14,587
Everybody on this island
got ear trouble?
381
00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:16,956
Man, I'm in no shape
for a tsunami.
382
00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:18,491
Well, that's odd.
383
00:19:18,558 --> 00:19:22,229
Few minutes ago, thought I heard
Ginger say you were leaving.
384
00:19:22,295 --> 00:19:23,563
That Ginger is an odd one.
385
00:19:23,630 --> 00:19:26,233
She's one chick,
sure plays hard to get.
386
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,503
- Not with the Professor.
- Professor?
387
00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:32,905
Well, I just saw them
both back there.
388
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:38,711
Sure, you're not angry at me?
389
00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:41,714
Don't give it
a second thought, dear.
390
00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:45,252
It was so stupid of me to pay
so much attention to Duke.
391
00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:48,221
I mean, all he does is talk
about his muscles
392
00:19:48,288 --> 00:19:50,523
'and you've got brains.'
393
00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:52,959
'How perfectly wonderful
you are.'
394
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,927
An extremely high IQ.
395
00:19:56,596 --> 00:20:01,067
- Say it for me once again.
- An extremely high IQ.
396
00:20:01,133 --> 00:20:03,236
No, I meant the name
of the star.
397
00:20:03,303 --> 00:20:05,838
Oh, Alpha Centauri.
398
00:20:05,905 --> 00:20:09,276
Oh...that's so romantic.
399
00:20:12,312 --> 00:20:15,014
(Professor)
'It's 4 and 3/10ths light years
from the Earth.'
400
00:20:15,081 --> 00:20:17,917
(Ginger)
'You don't know what a man
with brains does to me.'
401
00:20:17,984 --> 00:20:21,288
- Capital of North Dakota?
- Bismarck.
402
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:24,324
- Oh, South Dakota?
- Pierre.
403
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,628
Lucky, Pierre.
404
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:36,703
* Oh, it's a long, long way
to Hawaii *
405
00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:39,572
* But we're going
to go anyway *
406
00:20:39,639 --> 00:20:42,241
* It's a long, long way
to Hawaii *
407
00:20:42,309 --> 00:20:45,111
* But Duke will
make it anyway *
408
00:20:45,177 --> 00:20:46,112
* Ah *
409
00:20:46,178 --> 00:20:47,580
Oh, hi, Duke.
410
00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:49,616
Nice night
for a walk, isn't it?
411
00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:51,017
You want to know
something, Captain?
412
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:53,720
Why, I'm always interested
in gathering information.
413
00:20:53,786 --> 00:20:56,989
A redhead is a fickle piece
of chick, and that's for sure.
414
00:20:57,056 --> 00:21:00,627
You know, something? It's only
the brunettes you can trust.
415
00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:02,429
Just like I was telling
Mary Ann
416
00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:04,030
before she turned in
for the night.
417
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:06,265
- Oh, she's not in her hut.
- She's not?
418
00:21:06,333 --> 00:21:07,734
Right now,
she's with Gilligan.
419
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:11,404
- With Gilligan?
- In their usual place.
420
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:15,775
[humming]
421
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:21,814
- Oh, Duke was so bumpy.
- Is that bad?
422
00:21:21,881 --> 00:21:23,850
- Well, I like little muscles.
- Oh.
423
00:21:23,916 --> 00:21:24,951
What's wrong?
424
00:21:25,017 --> 00:21:27,253
Think you're taking the crease
out of my knees.
425
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:30,657
- Wonderfully knobby knees.
- Yeah, but it's time to change.
426
00:21:30,723 --> 00:21:32,725
And I got such
wonderful knobby elbows too.
427
00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:34,927
(Mary Ann)
'Spindly skinny arms.'
428
00:21:34,994 --> 00:21:36,629
(Gilligan)
'Skin and bones,
what I got most.'
429
00:21:36,696 --> 00:21:38,164
(Mary)
'I hate muscle men.'
430
00:21:38,230 --> 00:21:41,434
I like underdeveloped, underfed,
undernourished men like you.
431
00:21:41,501 --> 00:21:43,770
[Gilligan chuckles]
432
00:21:43,836 --> 00:21:45,705
Darling, you even have
skinny lips.
433
00:21:46,773 --> 00:21:49,709
Darling, t-take it easy,
you'll break me.
434
00:21:49,776 --> 00:21:51,711
Gilligan, can't you be
little more romantic?
435
00:21:51,778 --> 00:21:52,745
Okay.
436
00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:53,446
[buzzing]
437
00:21:53,513 --> 00:21:55,047
What are you doing?
438
00:21:55,114 --> 00:21:57,884
Don't know, got something
to do with the birds and bees.
439
00:22:00,620 --> 00:22:01,988
Here are your provisions, Duke.
440
00:22:02,054 --> 00:22:04,757
Now, remember. Tell 'em our
position is approximately
441
00:22:04,824 --> 00:22:07,193
110 degrees longitude
and 10 degrees latitude.
442
00:22:07,259 --> 00:22:08,728
Okay, okay
443
00:22:08,795 --> 00:22:11,297
but that's all I'm gonna
remember about this island.
444
00:22:11,364 --> 00:22:12,865
Oh, he fell for it.
445
00:22:12,932 --> 00:22:15,868
[water sloshing]
446
00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:21,273
Oh, dear, isn't it a shame
he isn't a Duke?
447
00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:23,576
At the moment, I'm glad
he is a surfer.
448
00:22:27,714 --> 00:22:29,849
- Gilligan.
- You want me?
449
00:22:31,050 --> 00:22:32,151
No, Gilligan.
450
00:22:32,218 --> 00:22:34,353
I called you because
I want the Professor.
451
00:22:34,421 --> 00:22:35,655
Okay.
452
00:22:37,089 --> 00:22:40,292
Take the binoculars, get up that
tree, tell us what he's doing.
453
00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:41,828
Aye aye, sir.
454
00:22:42,629 --> 00:22:45,565
Wait a minute.
455
00:22:45,632 --> 00:22:47,767
- Here.
- Yes, sir.
456
00:22:48,234 --> 00:22:49,702
[sighs]
457
00:22:54,140 --> 00:22:55,508
Wow!
458
00:22:57,477 --> 00:22:58,945
Wow!
459
00:22:59,011 --> 00:23:02,449
Gilligan, wow, wow, wow
doesn't tell us anything.
460
00:23:02,515 --> 00:23:05,051
- Give us a report.
- Aye aye, sir.
461
00:23:06,519 --> 00:23:09,722
There he is.
Ooh, he's up on top.
462
00:23:09,789 --> 00:23:12,959
(Gilligan)
'Now, he's down at the bottom.'
463
00:23:13,025 --> 00:23:14,427
Yes, there he is.
464
00:23:14,494 --> 00:23:16,896
(Gilligan)
'Oh, he's on a big one.'
465
00:23:16,963 --> 00:23:19,065
'Oh, ride 'em, Duke.
Keep with 'em, boy.'
466
00:23:19,131 --> 00:23:20,467
'Oh, there he goes.'
467
00:23:20,533 --> 00:23:22,702
He's on his way,
I'm coming down.
468
00:23:22,769 --> 00:23:25,905
Well, he's made it. Now it's
only a matter of time, Gilli..
469
00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:29,609
Skipper, did I hurt you?
470
00:23:29,676 --> 00:23:31,243
No, Gilligan,
you didn't hurt me.
471
00:23:31,310 --> 00:23:34,781
I'm used to having people fall
out of trees on top of me.
472
00:23:42,489 --> 00:23:44,891
Thanks a lot, Gilligan.
473
00:23:48,461 --> 00:23:50,029
(man on radio)
'Ladies and gentlemen'
474
00:23:50,096 --> 00:23:52,398
'there has been a week-long
search for a missing surfer.'
475
00:23:52,465 --> 00:23:56,168
'Well, this afternoon, he was
found, and we have him here.'
476
00:23:56,235 --> 00:23:59,806
- 'You're Duke Williams, right.'
- 'Yeah, think so.'
477
00:23:59,872 --> 00:24:01,107
- He made it.
- Shh.
478
00:24:01,173 --> 00:24:03,209
'Can you tell us
about your adventure?'
479
00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:05,712
(Duke on radio)
'Well, I hit this rock
when I beached and..'
480
00:24:05,778 --> 00:24:09,482
'Duke, what about the two weeks
you were gone, where were you?'
481
00:24:09,549 --> 00:24:11,283
Here goes the best part,
about us.
482
00:24:11,350 --> 00:24:12,785
Gilligan, will you be quiet?
483
00:24:12,852 --> 00:24:14,420
'I'm sorry, ladies
and gentlemen'
484
00:24:14,487 --> 00:24:17,123
'but the doctor is taking Duke
back to his hospital room.'
485
00:24:17,189 --> 00:24:19,158
'I'm afraid
the two-week-old mystery'
486
00:24:19,225 --> 00:24:21,127
'will stay a mystery forever.'
487
00:24:21,193 --> 00:24:24,330
'When Duke Williams hit that
rock, he developed amnesia.'
488
00:24:24,396 --> 00:24:27,233
'He can't remember
where he was or what he did.'
489
00:24:29,035 --> 00:24:32,304
Amnesia. Well, our luck
is still holding up.
490
00:24:32,371 --> 00:24:34,406
I was so sure
we'd be rescued.
491
00:24:34,473 --> 00:24:36,042
That's the way it goes.
492
00:24:36,108 --> 00:24:40,747
Sometimes the surf is up,
and sometimes the surf is down.
493
00:24:40,813 --> 00:24:42,481
And just what does that mean?
494
00:24:42,549 --> 00:24:45,552
Don't know, I'm still trying to
figure out the birds and bees.
495
00:24:55,027 --> 00:24:56,796
* Now this is the tale
of the castaways *
496
00:24:56,863 --> 00:24:58,831
* They're here
for a long, long time *
497
00:24:58,898 --> 00:25:01,400
* They'll have to make
the best of things *
498
00:25:01,467 --> 00:25:03,002
* It's an uphill climb *
499
00:25:03,069 --> 00:25:05,337
* The first mate
and his Skipper too *
500
00:25:05,404 --> 00:25:07,039
* Will do their very best *
501
00:25:07,106 --> 00:25:09,441
* To make the
others comfortable *
502
00:25:09,508 --> 00:25:11,277
* In the tropic island nest *
503
00:25:11,343 --> 00:25:13,813
* No phone, no lights,
no motorcars *
504
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:15,748
* Not a single luxury *
505
00:25:15,815 --> 00:25:17,884
* Like Robinson Crusoe *
506
00:25:17,950 --> 00:25:20,152
* It's primitive as can be *
507
00:25:20,219 --> 00:25:22,789
* So join us here
each week my friends *
508
00:25:22,855 --> 00:25:24,857
* You're sure to get a smile *
509
00:25:24,924 --> 00:25:26,893
* From seven
stranded castaways *
510
00:25:26,959 --> 00:25:29,061
* Here on Gilligan's isle *
38735
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