Original subtitles

* JUST SIT RIGHT BACK, AND YOU'LL HEAR A TALE *

* A TALE OF A FATEFUL TRIP *

* THAT STARTED FROM THIS TROPIC PORT *

* ABOARD THIS TINY SHIP *

* THE MATE WAS A MIGHTY SAILIN' MAN *

* THE SKIPPER BRAVE AND SURE *

* 5 PASSENGERS SET SAIL THAT DAY *

* FOR A 3-HOUR TOUR *

* A 3-HOUR TOUR *

[THUNDER]

* THE WEATHER STARTED GETTING ROUGH *

* THE TINY SHIP WAS TOSSED *

* IF NOT FOR THE COURAGE OF THE FEARLESS CREW *

* THE MINNOW WOULD BE LOST *

* THE MINNOW WOULD BE LOST *

* THE SHIP'S SET GROUND ON THE SHORE OF THIS *

* UNCHARTED DESERT ISLE *

* WITH GILLIGAN *

* THE SKIPPER, TOO *

* THE MILLIONAIRE *

* AND HIS WIFE *

* THE MOVIE STAR *

* AND THE REST *

* ARE HERE ON GILLIGAN'S ISLE *

FORE!

WE'RE PLAYING THROUGH HERE.

AH...WHERE'D IT GO, GILLIGAN?

THERE IT IS, MR. HOWELL. I KNEW I'D FIND IT!

OH! HO-HO. WELL, GOOD WORK, GILLIGAN.

I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE THAT ONE AGAIN.

NOW, WHERE AM I?

WELL, THERE'S YOUR AVOCADO PIT, MR. HOWELL.

I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

I FOUND YOUR BALL, BUT I LOST THE GOLF COURSE.

LOST THE GOLF COURSE! AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A CADDIE.

NO, I DON'T. YOU DO.

WELL, I'LL NEVER MAKE THAT MISTAKE AGAIN.

NOW JUST STAND BACK.

THERE YOU ARE.

WHERE'D IT GO, GILLIGAN?!

RIGHT THERE.

OH, THERE. YES, YES. OF COURSE. I SHANKED IT.

WATCH IT, GILLIGAN. CALL TIME.

WHICH WAY DID IT GO?

DON'T WORRY. I'LL FIND IT.

YES. I THINK I SLICED IT OVER THERE.

I WONDER WHERE IT IS. HUH.

I WONDER IF IT COULD BE DOWN...

THERRRRRE!

GILLIGAN! GILLIGAN, MY BOY, WHERE ARE YOU?

HEY, MR. HOWELL, I FOUND YOUR BALL.

HO-HO, YES, YES! THERE YOU ARE.

WAIT'LL YOU GET BACK HOME AND TELL 'EM ABOUT THIS.

YOU MADE A CAVE-IN-ONE.

YES. I ALSO SANK THE CADDIE WITH THE SAME SHOT.

SANK THE CAD--

GILLIGAN, WHAT'S THAT YELLOW STUFF?

WHAT YELLOW STUFF?

THAT YELLOW STUFF ALL OVER THE WALL.

OH...OH...

YOU MEAN THIS YELLOW STUFF THAT LOOKS LIKE GOLD?

YES, YES. WHAT IS IT?

UH...I THINK IT IS GOLD.

GOLD? GOLD?!

AAAAAH!

GOLD, GILLIGAN!

I'M RICHER.

I'M HURT A LITTLE... BUT I'M RICHER!

OH. WE LOST THE BAIT AGAIN.

OH. HOW MANY LITTLE FISHES DO WE HAVE LEFT?

JUST ONE.

HOW MANY DID WE HAVE WHEN WE STARTED?

24.

YOU MEAN WE'VE LOST 23 ALREADY?!

MM-HMM.

IF WE HADN'T GONE FISHING,

WE COULD HAVE HAD FISH FOR DINNER.

HEY! I THINK WE GOT A BIG ONE.

HEY!

IT FEELS LIKE A WHALE.

HO HO! IT'S TREMENDOUS.

PLAY HIM, GIRLS! PLAY HIM!

DON'T LET HIM GO NOW. HERE, I'LL TAKE IT.

WOW, YOU HAVE GOT A BIG ONE.

OH, BE CAREFUL.

DON'T WORRY, LADIES, I'LL LAND HIM.

HE'S PUTTING UP A GOOD FIGHT,

BUT I THINK I'VE GOT HIS NUMBER NOW.

PULL!

AAH!

PULL!

WATCH HIS TEETH. BE CAREFUL, SKIPPER.

NOW STAND BACK, STAND BACK.

WHATEVER IT IS MIGHT BE PLAYING POSSUM.

OH, HE'S PICKING IT UP!

HALLELUJAH, LADIES! WE'RE SAVED! WE'RE SAVED!

WE'VE GOT A RUBBER LIFE RAFT!

[SQUEALS]

SKIPPER, OH!

WHAT A FISH STORY THIS'LL MAKE--

CATCHING OUR OWN LIFE RAFT.

OFF YOUR BOAT?

YEAH. IT'S THE FIRST TIME

ANYBODY EVER CAUGHT A MINNOW WITH A MINNOW.

HOW DO WE KNOW IT'S GOLD?

DON'T YOU HAVE TO MAKE A TEST TO BE SURE?

I ALREADY HAVE. IT'S THE BEST TEST IN THE WORLD.

YOU'RE SHAKING LIKE A LEAF.

MY DOCTORS CALL IT MY GOLD SYNDROME.

SYNDROME? YES. IT'S AN ALLERGY.

OH. ALLERGY?

YES, AN ALLERGY.

SEE, ANYTIME I GET NEAR ANYTHING OVER 24 KARATS...

I BREAK OUT.

BOY, I CAN'T WAIT TO TELL THE PROFESSOR ABOUT THIS

AND THE SKIPPER AND THE GIRLS. WE'LL ALL BE RICH.

OH? DON'T YOU REMEMBER?

WE ALL MADE AN AGREEMENT TO SHARE EVERYTHING ON THE ISLAND.

YES, I DO RECALL MAKING THAT AGREEMENT,

BUT OF COURSE, THEN WE DIDN'T EXPECT TO FIND A GOLD MINE.

UNDERSTAND? DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT GOLD DOES TO PEOPLE, GILLIGAN?

UH-HUH-- MAKES 'EM RICH!

MAKES 'EM GREEDY.

GREEDY?

GREEDY!

WHAT CAN WE DO, MR. HOWELL?

WELL, WE'RE GONNA KEEP THIS GOLD MINE OUR SECRET.

SCOUT'S HONOR, I WON'T BREATHE A WORD TO ANYBODY.

WE'LL JUST LEAVE THIS FILTHY GOLD WHERE IT IS.

YES...NO, NO!

WE CAN'T TAKE THAT CHANCE, YOU SEE?

ONE OF THE OTHERS MIGHT FALL IN THE HOLE, LIKE YOU,

AND--HEH HEH-- THAT'LL BE THAT.

GOSH, YOU'RE ALWAYS THINKING OF THE OTHER FELLOW.

WELL, I'M A MULTI-MILLIONAIRE.

MY LIFE IS RUINED ALREADY.

WE HAVE TO PROTECT OUR POOR FRIENDS.

HOW, MR. HOWELL?

I'M GONNA HIRE YOU TO MINE THE GOLD.

I WON'T PAY YOU ENOUGH TO CAUSE YOU ANY TROUBLE.

THEN I'LL HIDE IT SO NO ONE WILL EVER BE ABLE TO FIND IT.

PROMISE YOU WON'T TELL ME WHERE YOU PUT IT?

SCOUT'S HONOR.

IT'S 3.

FORE! ALL CLEAR.

NOW DON'T FORGET, GILLIGAN.

I'LL SEE YOU FIRST THING IN THE MORNING AT THE, UH,

YOU KNOW WHAT.

YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU KNOW WHAT!

OH, THE GOLD-- ARRGH!

GILLIGAN, THERE YOU ARE-- HELLO, MR. HOWELL.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!

OH, MR. HOWELL AND I, WE WERE OVER THERE HAVING--

NEVER MIND, GILLIGAN. GUESS WHAT I FOUND.

YOU COULD GUESS ALL DAY LONG,

AND YOU STILL WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO GUESS.

GIVE US A HINT.

WELL, IT'S AN ANSWER TO ALL OUR PROBLEMS,

ALL OUR PRAYERS.

OH, WHAT I FOUND'S GONNA MAKE YOUR MOUTHS WATER.

YOU'VE FOUND A GOLD MINE!

[CRACK]

OW!

NO, GILLIGAN.

WE CAUGHT OUR OWN LIFE RAFT FROM THE MINNOW.

WE'RE GONNA BE ABLE TO GET OFF THIS ISLAND!

OH! THEN WE'RE SAVED!

OH, BOY! THIS IS OUR LUCKY DAY.

MR. HOWELL AND I, KNOW WHAT WE FOU-- [CRACK]

OW!

I'M SORRY, GILLIGAN.

WHEN DO WE LEAVE, SKIPPER, TOMORROW?

I'M READY TO LEAVE RIGHT NOW.

OH, NOT SO FAST, GILLIGAN.

WE GOT A LOT OF WORK TO DO ON THE RAFT.

SHE'S FULL OF HOLES.

OH, I'M GLAD TO HEAR THAT! GLAD?

OH! I MEAN THAT YOU'RE GONNA FIX IT.

OH, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT, MR. HOWELL.

SHE'LL BE SAFE AND SOUND WHEN WE ALL GET ON BOARD.

I'M SURE OF IT, CAPTAIN.

I'VE SAILED WITH YOU BEFORE,

AND I KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO WITH A BOAT.

THANKS, MR. HOWELL.

YOU HANDLED OUR SHIPWRECK MAGNIFICENTLY.

WELL...ANYWAY, GILLIGAN,

I WANT YOU UP AND ON THE BEACH

FIRST THING IN THE MORNING READY TO WORK.

OH, BUT I PROMISED MR. HOWELL

I'D GO DOWN AND DIG HIM--

[CRACK] OOH!

MISSED ME.

LOVEY, HAVE I GOT NEWS. NEWS?

YES. I'VE DISCOVERED A GOLD MINE ON THIS ISLAND.

OH, THAT'S WONDERFUL. THERE'S ONLY ONE COMPLICATION.

I DON'T THINK WE'LL BE ABLE TO MINE THE GOLD.

OH, THAT'S DREADFUL.

THE SKIPPER FOUND A RAFT,

AND IT LOOKS LIKE WE'LL BE RESCUED.

OH, THAT'S WONDERFUL.

SO WE WON'T HAVE TIME TO MINE THE GOLD.

OH, THAT'S DREADFUL.

GILLIGAN HAS TO WORK ALL DAY ON THE BOAT FOR THE SKIPPER.

L-L-LOVEY!

OH, I'M SORRY, THURSTON.

WHERE WERE WE, DREADFUL OR WONDERFUL?

IF THAT BOY HAS TO WORK DAY AND NIGHT, IT'S DREADFUL.

QUITE RIGHT, THURSTON.

YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE WONDERFUL?

IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL IF YOU WOULD GO DOWN INTO THAT MINE

AND HELP THAT BOY DIG.

OH, DEAR. WE'RE BACK AT DREADFUL AGAIN.

OH, GOOD MORNING, CAPTAIN.

HOW'S THE WORK COMING?

THE WORK IS COMING ALONG FINE, MR. HOWELL.

OH.

SOMETHING I CAN DO FOR YOU?

YES. I WOULD LIKE A FEW WORDS WITH GILLIGAN.

WELL, MAKE IT VERY FEW, WOULD YOU?

HE'S GOT A LOT OF WORK TO DO.

YES, YES, I UNDERSTAND. THANK YOU.

GILLIGAN. GILLIGAN, MY BOY.

OH, HI, MR. HOWELL.

GILLIGAN, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?

SURE.

BUT YOU LOOK SORT OF STRAINED.

I HAVEN'T DONE THIS KIND OF WORK IN A LONG TIME,

AND I'M A LITTLE OUT OF SHAPE.

I'LL SAY YOU ARE.

SORRY ABOUT TODAY,

BUT I COULDN'T SAY NO TO THE SKIPPER.

YOU WILL BE ABLE TO MAKE IT TONIGHT, WON'T YOU?

OH, SURE THING.

AS SOON AS THE SKIPPER GOES TO SLEEP, I'LL LEAVE.

YES, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO DO A LOT OF FINE DIGGING BEFORE DAWN.

OKAY. I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT.

GILLIGAN, I'M WORRIED ABOUT YOU.

OH, DON'T WORRY, MR. HOWELL.

I'M KIND OF IN TIGHT QUARTERS HERE,

BUT I MOVE AROUND A LOT. I'M OKAY, SEE?

FANTASTIC! REMIND ME WHEN WE GET BACK TO THE STATES,

I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE ED SULLIVAN SHOW.

HEH HEH HEH.

HIS...HEAD AND...

WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?

OH. MR. HOWELL IS GONNA PUT ME ON TELEVISION ON THE ED SULLIVAN SHOW.

DOING WHAT? I DON'T KNOW.

MAYBE MR. SULLIVAN'S BOAT NEEDS FIXING.

HEY, GILLIGAN, WE DID A PRETTY GOOD DAY'S WORK, EH?

MAKES YOU FEEL REAL GOOD, DOESN'T IT?

SURE DOES.

I WANNA TELL YOU, THAT MOTHER NATURE,

THERE'S A PRETTY GREAT OLD GAL.

SHE LETS YOU WORK ALL DAY LONG,

AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, SHE RINGS A BELL AND SAYS,

"YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH. IT'S TIME TO SLEEP."

YUP. MOTHER NATURE'S A GREAT OLD...GAL.

[YAWNS AND SNORES]

Hey, Gilligan, Gilligan.

[MOANS] Hey.

THERE WE ARE-- EXACTLY 32 OUNCES OF GOLD.

MR. HOWELL, ARE YOU SURE THAT SCALE IS RIGHT?

OH, CERTAINLY. MRS. HOWELL'S ENGAGEMENT RING

WEIGHS EXACTLY ONE POUND.

I'M USING IT AS A COUNTERWEIGHT.

YOU WANT ME TO DIG ANYMORE?

CERTAINLY. IT'S ONLY 4 A.M.

IS THAT ALL? THERE'S PROBABLY A LOT MORE GOLD IN HERE.

YOU CAN THANK MOTHER NATURE FOR THAT.

YOU THANK HER, HUH, MR. HOWELL?

YOU AND THE SKIPPER KNOW HER A LOT BETTER THAN I DO.

FOLKS, IF I MIGHT HAVE YOUR ATTENTION.

I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW

WE'RE GETTING THAT RAFT READY AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

NOT SO FAST, CAPTAIN.

I THINK YOU OUGHT TO MAKE SURE

IT'S SAFE FIRST, DON'T YOU?

QUITE RIGHT, THURSTON. YOU ALL KNOW THE OLD SAYING--

"A STITCH IN TIME..." UH, "STITCH IN TIME..."

WELL, YOU ALL KNOW THE OLD SAYING.

THERE'S NO POINT IN REPEATING IT.

HOW LONG DO YOU THINK IT'LL TAKE, SKIPPER?

DON'T ASK ME. ASK GILLIGAN.

OH, LEAVE THE POOR BOY ALONE.

HE'S TRYING TO DRINK SOME WATER.

NO, HE ISN'T. HE'S ASLEEP.

WAKE UP, GILLIGAN!

IT'S YOUR TURN TO GET UP FIRST.

I GOT UP FIRST YESTERDAY. IT'S YOUR TURN.

ASLEEP AGAIN.

YES. I GUESS I BETTER GET HIM BACK TO BED.

NEVER MIND. WE'LL PUT HIM NIGHTY-NIGHT.

COME ON, LOVEY.

LOVEY, DEAR, YOU TAKE THE OTHER ARM.

I WILL, JUST AS SOON AS I CAN GET

THIS CUP OF GUAVA JELLY OFF HIS ELBOW.

NIGHTY-NIGHT.

WE'VE GOT TO GIVE HIM HIS TEDDY BEAR.

HAH! COME ON, SANDYMAN IS COMING. NIGHTY-NIGHT.

WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE IS THE MATTER WITH GILLIGAN?

I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM SO TIRED.

WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE IS THE MATTER WITH MR. HOWELL?

I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM SO CONSIDERATE.

YOU KNOW, THEY DON'T SEEM VERY ANXIOUS TO GET THE RAFT FIXED.

Gilligan...shh, shh! Dig, dig.

COME, GILLIGAN, MY BOY. THAT'S IT. UP AND AT 'EM.

OFF WE GO TO THE MINE TO DIG.

SHH--NO, NO, SON. YOU'LL BE ALRIGHT.

DOWN THAT WAY TO THE MINE. THERE YOU GO.

NOW, LET ME SEE. IF HE MINES 16 INGOTS TONIGHT--

HE'S A WILLING BOY. HE'S GOT A STRONG BACK.

NO LABOR PROBLEM THERE. SALARY...WELL, WE'LL JUST CUT HIM IN.

THE SMELTING COSTS ARE ABSOLUTELY NEGLIGIBLE,

BUT THE SHIPPING-- HOWELL ENTERPRISES SHOULD GROSS 6 BILLION.

PUT THAT INTO LOVEY'S NAME IN A DUMMY CORPORATION...

OH, WELL, OH, WELL...

COUNTING MY MONEY MADE ME SLEEPY.

OH-DUH-DUHH--

OH-OH-OHHHH!

HI, SKIPPER. GLAD YOU DROPPED IN.

GILLIGAN--OH! OHH!

WHAT IS THAT?

A ONE-POUND DIAMOND RING.

SO THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE BEEN UP TO.

YOU'VE GOT A DIAMOND MINE.

NO. THAT BELONGS TO MRS. HOWELL.

WELL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN HERE?

WELL, I...

AND WHAT'S ALL THIS STUFF ALL OVER THE WALLS?

GOLD.

GOLD?!

GOLD?! GOLD?! GOLD?!

AND THAT'S THE STORY, FOLKS.

I WAS UP TILL 5:30 THIS MORNING WITH MR. HOWELL,

AND HE WOULDN'T GIVE AN INCH.

SO WE MIGHT JUST AS WELL FINISH WORKING ON THE RAFT.

GILLIGAN'S DUG A LOT OF GOLD OUT OF THAT MINE.

DOESN'T HE GET ANY?

NO, PROFESSOR. HE WAS WORKING ON

A STRAIGHT HOURLY APPRENTICE RATE.

I DON'T THINK THAT'S FAIR. DO YOU, MARY ANN?

I CERTAINLY DO NOT. COULDN'T WE GO TO MRS. HOWELL?

THAT WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD EITHER, MARY ANN.

SHE'S WORKING BY THE HOUR, TOO.

I HATE TO SAY THIS, SKIPPER,

BUT LAST NIGHT WHEN I WAS LOOKING DOWN THE MINE

AT ALL THAT GOLD,

SOMETHING HAPPENED TO ME.

WELL, GINGER, IF YOU CAN ADMIT IT, SO CAN I.

I'VE GOT GOLD FEVER.

PROFESSOR?

WHY NOT? SCHOOLTEACHERS ARE HUMAN.

IT'S AMAZING. WE'VE ALL BEEN BITTEN

BY THE SAME BUG AT THE SAME TIME.

GEE. I HOPE IT ISN'T CATCHING.

I'D HATE TO SEE POOR GILLIGAN COME DOWN WITH IT.

IT'S A CINCH HE'LL CATCH IT SOONER OR LATER.

DON'T SAY THAT, SKIPPER.

DON'T SAY WHAT? WHAT HAVE I GOT? WHAT HAVE I GOT?

CALM DOWN, GILLIGAN.

SKIPPER, YOU GOTTA TELL ME THE TRUTH. WHAT HAVE I GOT?

I KNOW THERE'S NO DOCTOR OR HOSPITAL ON THIS ISLAND.

I WANNA KNOW THE TRUTH. WHAT HAVE I GOT?

ALL I SAID IS THAT YOU WILL PROBABLY GET WHAT WE'VE ALREADY GOT.

OH, NO! OH, NO, NO! WHAT'S EVERYBODY GOT?

GOLD FEVER, GILLIGAN.

THAT'S WHAT MR. HOWELL SAID WOULD HAPPEN.

OH, NEVER MIND ALL THAT NOW.

I SENT YOU OVER TO MR. HOWELL WITH A FINAL PLEA

IN HOPES THAT HE MIGHT SHARE HIS GOLD WITH US.

RIGHT, SKIPPER. LIKE I TOLD HIM,

ALL FOR ONE AND ONE FOR ALL.

AND WHAT WAS HIS ANSWER?

HE SENT ME BACK WITH THIS LETTER.

WELL, READ THE LETTER ALOUD.

EVERYBODY IS CONCERNED WITH IT, GILLIGAN.

YOU WANT ME TO READ THE WHOLE LETTER?

THE WHOLE LETTER. WHAT IS HIS ANSWER?

AHEM...

"NO."

HE CERTAINLY WRITES A NICE LETTER.

I GUESS IT'S HOPELESS.

TURNED ME DOWN. NOW HE'S TURNED GILLIGAN DOWN.

WE'VE TRIED EVERY APPROACH.

NOT EVERY APPROACH, SKIPPER.

[WHISTLING]

HELLO, MR. HOWELL.

YES, YES, MISS GRANT.

I WAS JUST WONDERING--

EVERYONE'S BEEN WONDERING, AND THE ANSWER IS NO.

NO?

THAT'S RIGHT. A 14-KARAT NO.

BUT, MR. HOWELL, I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.

MR. HOWELL, I DON'T THINK THE OTHERS

HAVE BEEN VERY FAIR TO YOU ABOUT YOUR GOLD MINE.

YOU DON'T?

NO. I DON'T LIKE THE WAY THEY'VE BEEN ACTING AT ALL.

HEAVENS TO FORT KNOX, NEITHER DO I.

MR. HOWELL, I THINK THEY'VE BEEN MAKING YOU FEEL GUILTY

ABOUT DIGGING YOUR GOLD MINE.

I'VE BEEN DIGGING SO FAST, I HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO FEEL GUILTY.

I BEEN--I--I--

MR. HOWELL. YES?

I THINK THEY'RE VERY GREEDY,

DEPRIVING YOU OF THE RIGHT TO BE GENEROUS

AND TO BE THE WONDERFUL MAN I KNOW YOU ARE.

WHAT?

MR. HOWELL, I KNOW YOU.

I KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN IN YOUR SOUL,

YOU'RE A WONDERFUL, GENEROUS MAN,

AND YOU WANTED TO SHARE YOUR GOLD WITH ALL OF US.

YES, I DID...

BUT THANK GOODNESS I FOUGHT OFF THAT NASTY IMPULSE.

THE ANSWER IS STILL...NO!

NO?

NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.

THE ONLY WAY WE'RE GONNA GET ANY GOLD FOR OURSELVES

IS TO STAKE OUT A CLAIM AND START DIGGING.

YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!

WATER, PLEASE.

[GASP] DID YOU HAVE TO SPILL EVERYTHING ALL OVER THE TABLE?

DO YOU HAVE TO YELL AT THE TABLE?

[COUGHS]

DO YOU HAVE TO SING AT THE TABLE?

I WASN'T SINGING. I WAS COUGHING.

WELL, DO YOU HAVE TO COUGH AT THE TABLE?

NO GOLD FOR YOU EITHER, HUH?

NOT A NUGGET.

HI...

[ALL GRIPING AT ONCE]

ANYONE WANNA WORK ON THE RAFT TONIGHT?

ABSOLUTELY! GOOD IDEA, SKIPPER!

I'M SORRY WE'RE LATE, FOLKS,

BUT WE JUST STRUCK A RICH VEIN,

AND LOVEY WAS AFRAID IT MIGHT BLEED ALL OVER THE FLOOR.

Mrs. Howell: THURSTON CAN'T STAND A MESSY MINE.

HE ALWAYS SAYS A MINE THAT'S LUMPY MAKES YOU GRUMPY.

AN ODE TO THE MOTHER LODE!

WELL, DON'T LET YOUR BAD LUCK

RUIN OUR GOOD DINNER, RIGHT, LOVEY?

RIGHT, DARLING. YOU'VE NO IDEA

HOW FILLING 50 BAGS WITH GOLD GIVES YOU AN APPETITE.

COME ON, LET'S GO DOWN

AND TAKE A LOOK AT THE RAFT, HUH?

YES. I'M NOT VERY HUNGRY ANYWAY.

SAY, UH, CAPTAIN... HOW'S IT COMING? ANY PROGRESS?

NOT SINCE I'VE BEEN IN THE MINING BUSINESS.

I'M GONNA TURN IN MY PICK AND SHOVEL

AND START WORKING ON THAT RAFT IN THE MORNING.

AS LONG AS YOU'RE TURNING IN YOUR MINING TOOLS,

PERHAPS MRS. HOWELL AND I COULD USE THEM.

WHEN I SAY "USE," OF COURSE I MEAN ON A RENTAL BASIS.

SAY, IF I RENT 'EM TO YOU, MAYBE I CAN DO--

THAT'D WORK OUT JUST FINE. HA HA HA!

ANYBODY HOME?

WHO'S CALLING?

GILLIGAN'S RENT-A-PICK CALLING.

YES, YES, GENTLEMEN. COME IN.

DOOR-TO-CAVE SERVICE.

BOY, HAVE WE GOT SOME BARGAINS FOR YOU.

I JUST LOVE BARGAINS.

GENTLEMEN, THIS IS AN UNEXPECTED PLEASURE, I MUST SAY.

ALL PART OF OUR SERVICE, MR. HOWELL.

OH, LOVEY, COME SEE WHAT DADDY HAS BOUGHT FOR YOU.

WE HAVE 6 PIECES HERE.

IF YOU BUY ALL 6, WE'LL GIVE YOU A VERY SPECIAL PRICE.

WE HATE TO BREAK UP A SET.

GOOD MORNING, GILLIGAN. HOW ARE YOU, SKIPPER?

OH, THURSTON HOWELL III,

ARE ALL THESE BEAUTIFUL THINGS FOR ME?

NOTHING FINER FOR THE DAINTY MINER.

OH, DARLING, YOU'RE SO EXTRAVAGANT.

YES, MY DEAR. I'LL SEE YOU LATER AT THE PAPAYA CLUB.

I CAN'T WAIT TO USE THEM. THANK YOU, DARLING.

NOW, GENTLEMEN, WHAT IS THE NAME OF YOUR COMPANY?

OH, NO CHECKS, PLEASE, MR. HOWELL.

NO CHECKS?!

NO BANKS.

MONEY WILL DO JUST FINE.

I HAVEN'T USED MONEY IN THE PAST 25 YEARS.

MIGHT I SUGGEST ONE OF THESE BAGS?

ONE OF THOSE BAGS IS WORTH $200!

WELL, MIGHT I SUGGEST 2 OF THESE BAGS?

BUT--

...SO THE ELEPHANT SAID, "LET GO OF MY TRUNK."

OH, GINGER, MY COMPLIMENTS TO THE CHEF.

THAT WAS A SUPERB SEAFOOD SALAD. THANK YOU.

I HOPE THE LOBSTER WASN'T TOO RICH FOR YOU.

IF HE WAS, HE DIDN'T GET A CHANCE TO MENTION IT.

THURSTON, YOU KNOW, I THINK IT'S RUDE

TO TALK ABOUT MONEY AT THE TABLE IN FRONT OF A STRANGE LOBSTER.

WILL THAT BE ALL, SIR?

YES, THAT'LL BE ALL. HERE YOU ARE, SIR.

WHAT IS THIS? THAT'S THE DINNER CHECK.

$740?!

SEAFOOD SALAD--$175?!

LOBSTER--200?!

GRAPEFRUIT MUFFINS--125,

SIDE ORDER OF GUAVA JELLY-- 50, UH...

SO THAT'S YOUR LITTLE GAME, HUH?

FIRST THE SKIPPER, THEN GILLIGAN.

YOU'RE GONNA CHARGE US FOR OUR MEALS, HUH? WELL!

THAT'S A FINE KETTLE OF FISH.

THANKS FOR REMINDING ME, MRS. HOWELL.

FOR WHAT?

ONE KETTLE OF FISH--$300.

AND THAT IS POSITIVELY MY LAST OFFER.

WELL, IF $600 IS ALL YOU CAN SPEND,

TAKE ONLY 3 CANDLES. WHAT?

YOU CAN'T BEAT THAT PRICE ANYPLACE ON THE ISLAND.

PLEASE, THURSTON. YOU CAN'T SEE A THING DOWN IN THAT MINE.

ALRIGHT, I'LL TAKE 6 CANDLES.

GIVE THE MAN $1,200.

$50 MORE, AND I COULD GIFT-WRAP THESE FOR YOU.

NO. $1,200 FOR 6 OF THEM, THAT'S MY LAST OFFER.

WELL, YOU'RE THE MAN WITH THE GOLD MINE.

OH, BY THE WAY, AS LONG AS YOU'RE HERE,

WOULD YOU LIKE TO LOOK AT SOME WICKS?

YOU MEAN THERE AREN'T ANY WICKS IN THESE CANDLES?

NOT FOR THIS KIND OF MONEY.

THAT RAFT IS IN PERFECT SHAPE.

WE CAN FLOAT FOR DAYS UNTIL WE'RE SPOTTED BY A SHIP OR A PLANE.

I HOPE THAT PROVISIONS HAVE BEEN MADE FOR MY BAG OF GOLD ABOARD YOUR RAFT.

NOTHING DOING. THE PROFESSOR KNOWS EXACTLY HOW MUCH WEIGHT THAT RAFT WILL SUPPORT.

RIGHT. WITH OUR COMBINED WEIGHT AND THE WEIGHT OF THE PROVISIONS,

WE CAN'T TAKE A CHANCE. GOLD IS VERY HEAVY.

WELL, MY BAG ISN'T HEAVY.

MINE'S AS LIGHT AS A FEATH--

CAN'T I TAKE A TEENSY-WEENSY LITTLE BAG OF GOLD?

HOW TEENSY-WEENSY A BAG?

THIS TEENSY-WEENSY?

NO!

[THUD] OHH!

THERE WILL BE NO GOLD ABOARD THE RAFT,

AND THAT GOES FOR YOU, TOO, GILLIGAN.

I DON'T HAVE ANY GOLD.

YOU HAD $3,000 WORTH LAST NIGHT.

I KNOW. I NEVER SHOULD'VE ORDERED THAT COCONUT CREAM PIE.

ALRIGHT, EVERYBODY, GET ON BOARD.

I WANNA TAKE THESE GOLF STICKS BACK

TO SHOW TO THE BOYS AT THE CLUB.

MILLION LAUGHS.

MR. HOWELL. MRS. HOWELL.

OH, CAPTAIN, THAT'S ALRIGHT.

I MADE THIS HANDBAG WHILE I WAS HERE.

I WANT TO TAKE IT HOME TO SHOW EVERYONE.

WHY, CERTAINLY. WATCH YOUR STEP NOW.

WATCH IT THERE, DEAR.

THIS IS MY HOMEMADE GUAVA JELLY.

CAN'T HAVE TOO MUCH OF THIS AROUND.

HA HA! THAT'S RIGHT, MARY ANN. WATCH YOUR STEP.

I'VE GOT A COMPLETE DIARY OF EVERY DAY WE'VE SPENT HERE.

SHOULD MAKE A GREAT MOVIE, HUH?

I SHOULD SAY SO.

THESE BOTANICAL SPECIMENS

SHOULD BE OF SPECIAL INTEREST BACK AT THE SCHOOL.

DON'T FALL OVER THAT, PROFESSOR.

ALRIGHT, GILLIGAN... CAST OFF.

I SURE HOPE THIS FLOATS. YOU KNOW HOW DEEP THE LAGOON IS.

I KNOW HOW DEEP THE LAGOON IS.

NOW CAST OFF.

EVERYBODY GET AN OAR! HERE WE GO, FOLKS...

HEADED FOR THE SHIPPING LANES AND RESCUE!

YEAH, AU REVOIR! GOOD-BYE, ISLAND!

BYE!

YEAH, GOOD-BYE.

STROKE! STROKE!

ROW, MRS. HOWELL!

GILLIGAN, HOLD YOUR COURSE--

WE'RE SINKING.

PREPOSTEROUS!

WE COULDN'T HAVE 2 DISASTERS UNDER THE SAME CAPTAIN.

SKIPPER, WHAT WILL WE DO?

AAH! IT'S ALRIGHT.

WHAT'LL WE DO?

ABANDON-- ABANDON SHIP!

WOMEN AND LUGGAGE FIRST!

OH! MY HAT! OH!

WE'RE DROWNING! OH! I CAN'T SWIM!

WOMEN AND LUGGAGE FIRST! WOMEN AND LUGGAGE FIRST!

AAH! LOVEY!

SKIPPER, ARE YOU OR AREN'T YOU GONNA GO DOWN WITH THE SHIP?

I HOPE NOT, BUT IF I GO, YOU'LL GO WITH ME!

Thurston: GILLIGAN! GET MY GOLF CLUBS!

THERE! GET MY GOLF CLUBS!

LOVEY! WHERE ARE YOU, MY DARLING?

HANG ON!

WE SANK ANYWAY, EVEN WITHOUT THE GOLD.

I'M AFRAID THIS IS ALL MY FAULT, FOLKS.

I DIDN'T THINK ONE BAG OF GOLD WOULD SINK US.

2 BAGS.

3 BAGS.

4 BAGS.

5 BAGS.

6 BAGS?

HUH, THAT'S A SWITCH.

USUALLY, I'M THE ONE LEFT HOLDING THE BAG.

WELL, I GUESS WE'VE ALL LEARNED A BITTER LESSON.

YOU'RE SO RIGHT, PROFESSOR.

WE'VE LOST ALL OUR GOLD,

AND WE'VE RUINED OUR LIFE RAFT,

ALL BECAUSE WE WERE SO GREEDY.

I'LL NEVER BE GREEDY AGAIN.

NEITHER WILL I.

NEITHER WILL I. THURSTON?

YOU PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS TAKING THE FUN OUT OF LIFE.

OOH! MM...MM...

LOOK WHAT I FOUND IN THIS OYSTER.

Ginger: IT'S A PEARL!

WHY, IT'S A PERFECT PEARL!

UH, WHERE'D YOU FIND THAT OYSTER?

OVER IN THE COVE. THERE'S HUNDREDS OF THEM.

HUNDREDS OF THEM!

OR MAYBE THOUSANDS OF THEM!

OR MAYBE ONLY 1, 2, 3, 4... ALL FOR ME.

* THEY'RE HERE FOR A LONG, LONG TIME *

* THEY'LL HAVE TO MAKE THE BEST OF THINGS *

* IT'S AN UPHILL CLIMB *

* THE FIRST MATE AND HIS SKIPPER, TOO *

* WILL DO THEIR VERY BEST *

* TO MAKE THE OTHERS COMFORTABLE *

* IN THEIR TROPIC ISLAND NEST *

* NO PHONE, NO LIGHTS, NO MOTORCAR *

* NOT A SINGLE LUXURY *

* LIKE ROBINSON CRUSOE *

* IT'S PRIMITIVE AS CAN BE *

* SO JOIN US HERE EACH WEEK, MY FRIENDS *

* YOU'RE SURE TO GET A SMILE *

* FOR 7 STRANDED CASTAWAYS *

* HERE ON GILLIGAN'S ISLE *