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1
00:00:02,419 --> 00:00:05,504
Dad wants us to pick up where
he left off. Saving people, hunting things.
2
00:00:06,881 --> 00:00:08,048
Family business.
3
00:00:10,218 --> 00:00:12,177
There's a really good cure
for a hangover.
4
00:00:12,345 --> 00:00:15,097
It's a greasy pork sandwich
served up in a dirty ashtray.
5
00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:17,099
Oh, I hate you.
- I know you do.
6
00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:19,268
We're not gonna start that.
Start what?
7
00:00:19,436 --> 00:00:22,062
That prank stuff.
It's stupid and it always escalates.
8
00:00:22,230 --> 00:00:23,397
What's the matter, Sam?
9
00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:25,733
Afraid you're gonna get a little Nair
in your shampoo?
10
00:00:25,900 --> 00:00:27,359
Just remember you started it.
11
00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:31,113
What the-?
One: me.
12
00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:34,241
- That's all you got? That's weak.
- You're a frigging jerk.
13
00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:36,160
- You smell like a toilet.
- Chicken.
14
00:00:36,327 --> 00:00:37,494
- Jerk.
- Bitch.
15
00:00:37,662 --> 00:00:38,996
- Shut up.
- Wuss.
16
00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:40,372
- Bitch.
- Jerk.
17
00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:46,920
Well, bring it on, baldy.
18
00:01:16,159 --> 00:01:17,701
Excuse me.
19
00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:20,120
Are you lost?
20
00:01:20,288 --> 00:01:22,831
No, I've been waiting for you, professor.
21
00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:23,999
Huh.
22
00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:27,294
- Ah, you're in one of my classes?
- Don't you recognize me?
23
00:01:27,962 --> 00:01:29,171
Well...
24
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:30,506
Uh, they're big classes.
25
00:01:30,673 --> 00:01:33,175
Anyway, my office hours
are Tuesday and Thursday mornings.
26
00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:36,678
Really?
I was hoping I could see you now.
27
00:01:37,555 --> 00:01:39,348
Um...
28
00:01:42,143 --> 00:01:44,686
Well, since you asked so nicely,
come on.
29
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:03,622
Such a handsome photo.
30
00:02:05,041 --> 00:02:06,542
That old thing?
31
00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:09,670
So, what can I do for you?
How's the Anscombe paper coming?
32
00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,297
Uh, professor, I...
33
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,384
Uh...
34
00:02:16,219 --> 00:02:17,761
I have a confession to make.
35
00:02:17,929 --> 00:02:19,304
Oh, what's that?
36
00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:21,974
I'm not really one of your students.
37
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,767
Really?
38
00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,561
Then why are you here?
39
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,738
- Maybe I should just go.
- Wait.
40
00:02:41,536 --> 00:02:42,995
I get it.
41
00:02:44,747 --> 00:02:47,666
I understand how you're feeling
and it's only natural.
42
00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:52,629
You are young and wide-eyed...
43
00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:57,885
...and I'm somewhat
of a celebrity around here.
44
00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:10,022
Don't get me wrong,
you're a very beautiful girl...
45
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:16,069
...but it would be wrong of me
to take advantage of you.
46
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:20,699
I just, uh... I just respect you too much.
47
00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:52,731
Oh, my God.
48
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:56,818
What?
49
00:03:56,986 --> 00:03:58,862
Don't you like me anymore?
50
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,289
Don't you want me?
51
00:04:56,587 --> 00:04:59,423
Takin' my time
Choosin' my line
52
00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:09,099
Looks like my stop
Don't want to get off
53
00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:10,726
Got myself hung up on you
54
00:05:10,893 --> 00:05:15,063
Dude, you mind not eating those
on my bed?
55
00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:17,774
You don't want to talk about it
56
00:05:17,942 --> 00:05:19,568
No, I don't mind.
57
00:05:20,069 --> 00:05:23,071
You just turn your pretty head
And walk away
58
00:05:26,242 --> 00:05:29,745
- How's the research going?
- You know how it's going?
59
00:05:30,079 --> 00:05:31,079
Slow.
60
00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:34,041
You know how it would go
a heck of a lot faster?
61
00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:37,878
- If I had my computer.
- Mm.
62
00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:41,798
Places I've known
Things that I'm growing
63
00:05:41,966 --> 00:05:46,303
Don't taste the same without you
64
00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:49,264
- Can you turn that down, please?
- Yeah, absolutely.
65
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:55,437
And I find myself starving without you
66
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:56,646
Seems to me
67
00:05:56,814 --> 00:05:57,981
You know what? Maybe, uh...
68
00:05:58,149 --> 00:06:00,233
Maybe you should just go somewhere
for a while, huh?
69
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:02,402
Hey, I'd love to. That's a great idea.
70
00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:05,572
- Unfortunately, my car's screwed to hell.
- I told you I had nothing to do-
71
00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:22,631
Hey, Bobby.
- Boys.
72
00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:24,591
Hey, Bobby.
73
00:06:25,593 --> 00:06:27,135
It's good to see you again so soon.
74
00:06:27,303 --> 00:06:29,971
Yeah, uh, thanks for coming.
75
00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:31,973
Come on in.
76
00:06:33,434 --> 00:06:35,268
Thank God you're here.
77
00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:39,689
So, what didn't you wanna talk to me
on the phone about?
78
00:06:39,857 --> 00:06:41,441
It's this job we're working we-
79
00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,236
We weren't sure you'd believe us.
80
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:46,029
Well, I can believe a lot.
81
00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:49,074
No, yeah, yeah. I know.
It's just, we've never seen anything like it.
82
00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:50,283
Not even close.
83
00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:52,285
We thought we could use
some fresh eyes.
84
00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:54,454
Well, why don't you begin
at the beginning?
85
00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:56,790
Yeah. Um, all right, please.
86
00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,375
So...
87
00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:00,961
...it all started
when we caught wind of an obit.
88
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:04,423
See, a professor took a nosedive
from a fourth-story window.
89
00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:07,300
Only there's a campus legend
that the building's haunted.
90
00:07:07,468 --> 00:07:10,220
So we pretexted as reporters
from the local paper.
91
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:17,686
We both had the professor
for Ethics and Morality.
92
00:07:17,854 --> 00:07:19,980
Yeah? So why do you think he did it?
93
00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:24,609
Who knows? He was tenured, wife and kids,
his book was, like, a really big deal.
94
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:29,030
Then again, who's to say it was suicide?
95
00:07:29,198 --> 00:07:31,491
- Jen, come on.
- Well, what else could it be?
96
00:07:31,659 --> 00:07:34,578
- Well, you know about Crawford Hall.
- No. I don't, actually.
97
00:07:34,745 --> 00:07:36,455
It's a bunch of crap,
a total urban legend.
98
00:07:36,622 --> 00:07:39,291
Yeah? Well, Heather's mom
went to school here and she knew the girl.
99
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:40,667
Wait, what girl?
100
00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:45,464
Like 30 years ago, this girl was having
an affair with some professor.
101
00:07:45,882 --> 00:07:48,675
He broke it off. She jumped
out the window and killed herself.
102
00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:51,428
- You know her name?
- No.
103
00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:54,598
But they say she jumped from Room 669.
104
00:07:54,765 --> 00:07:57,517
Get it? You turn the nine upside down.
105
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,481
So now she haunts the building.
106
00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:06,067
And anyone who sees her,
they don't live to tell the tale.
107
00:08:06,235 --> 00:08:09,321
Well, if no one lives to tell the tale,
then how does the tale get told?
108
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:10,822
Curtis, shut up.
109
00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:15,285
You know what? Uh, thanks a lot, guys.
Excuse me.
110
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,433
Dean, what are you-?
What are you drinking?
111
00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:42,354
I don't know, man. I think they're called
purple nurples. Ha, ha.
112
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,981
I think maybe we should go check out
the professor's office.
113
00:08:45,149 --> 00:08:46,983
Oh, no, no, no. I can't right now.
114
00:08:47,151 --> 00:08:51,196
I got some... I've got a feisty little wildcat
on the hook. I'm about to, zip, reel her in.
115
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,447
- I'll introduce you.
- Dean-
116
00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:55,283
Starla. Starla, hey.
117
00:08:55,451 --> 00:09:00,038
This is my shuttle copilot, Major Tom.
Major Tom, Starla.
118
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:03,458
Mm, ha, ha. Enchanté.
119
00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:05,585
Hi.
120
00:09:12,843 --> 00:09:15,554
Sorry. Just trying to keep
my liquor down. Ha, ha.
121
00:09:15,721 --> 00:09:17,806
Yeah. Good job.
122
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,224
Hey, good news.
123
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,476
She's got a sister.
124
00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:28,191
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
125
00:09:28,359 --> 00:09:29,985
- Hold on a minute.
- What?
126
00:09:30,152 --> 00:09:32,612
Come on, dude.
That's not how it happened.
127
00:09:32,780 --> 00:09:35,615
No? So you never drank a purple nurple?
128
00:09:35,783 --> 00:09:37,576
Yeah, maybe that.
129
00:09:37,743 --> 00:09:40,745
I don't say things like "feisty little wildcat."
Her name wasn't Starla.
130
00:09:40,913 --> 00:09:42,205
Then what was it?
131
00:09:43,499 --> 00:09:45,625
I don't know.
But she was a classy chick.
132
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:48,503
She was a grad student:
Anthropology and Folklore.
133
00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:50,880
We were talking
about local ghost stories.
134
00:09:58,097 --> 00:09:59,347
Here's to-
135
00:09:59,515 --> 00:10:01,474
Here's to us.
136
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:10,775
My God, you are attractive.
137
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,945
Thanks, but no time for that now.
138
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:18,325
You need to tell me
about this urban legend.
139
00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:21,202
Please, lives are at stake.
140
00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:25,165
I'm sorry, I just-
I can't even concentrate.
141
00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:28,293
It's like staring...
142
00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:31,546
...into the sun.
143
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:47,145
Dean, what do you think you're doing?
144
00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:54,027
Sam, please.
145
00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:57,030
If you wouldn't mind,
just give me five minutes here.
146
00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,240
Dean, this is a very serious investigation.
147
00:10:59,408 --> 00:11:01,785
We don't have time for any
of your blah-blah blah-blah.
148
00:11:01,952 --> 00:11:02,994
Blah-blah blah-blah.
149
00:11:03,371 --> 00:11:05,288
Blah, blah blah blah!
150
00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:08,958
Blah, blah-blah-blah blah.
151
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:11,920
Blah!
152
00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:13,922
Right, and that's how it really happened?
153
00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,342
- I don't sound like that.
- That's how you sound like to me.
154
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,928
Okay, what's going on with you two?
155
00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:21,805
Nothing. It's nothing.
156
00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:24,683
Come on. Now, you're bickering
like an old married couple.
157
00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:27,018
No. See, married couples
can get divorced.
158
00:11:27,436 --> 00:11:29,771
Me and him?
We're like, uh, Siamese twins.
159
00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:32,399
- It's conjoined twins.
- See what I mean?
160
00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:34,943
Look, it...
161
00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:38,238
We've just been on the road for too long.
Tight quarters, all that.
162
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:39,447
Don't worry about it.
163
00:11:39,615 --> 00:11:40,699
Okay.
164
00:11:40,866 --> 00:11:44,035
So anyway,
we figured it might be a haunting...
165
00:11:44,203 --> 00:11:46,955
...so we went to check out
the scene of the crime.
166
00:11:49,917 --> 00:11:55,296
So How long you been working here?
I've been mopping for six years.
167
00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:58,675
There you go, guys.
168
00:12:01,011 --> 00:12:02,178
What the heck's that for?
169
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:04,806
Just finding wires in the walls.
170
00:12:04,974 --> 00:12:07,183
Ah, well...
171
00:12:07,643 --> 00:12:09,894
Not sure why you're wiring up
this office.
172
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:11,563
Not gonna do the professor much good.
173
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,023
- Why's that?
- He's dead.
174
00:12:14,191 --> 00:12:16,401
Oh, what happened?
175
00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:19,946
He went out that window right there.
176
00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:21,656
- Yeah?
- Mm-hm.
177
00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:24,200
- Were you working that night?
- I'm the one who found him.
178
00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:26,745
You see it happen?
Nope.
179
00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:29,164
I just saw him come up here and, uh...
180
00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:31,541
- Well...
- What?
181
00:12:32,626 --> 00:12:34,711
He wasn't alone.
182
00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:38,715
Who was he with?
183
00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:40,633
Come on. I ate one, maybe two.
184
00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:42,594
Just let me tell it, okay?
185
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,596
He was with a young lady.
186
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:47,724
I told the cops about her,
but, uh, I guess they never found her.
187
00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,851
You saw this girl go in, huh?
188
00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:52,145
But did you ever see her come out?
189
00:12:52,313 --> 00:12:54,022
Now that you mention it, no.
190
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:56,566
You ever see her before around?
191
00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:59,110
- Well, not her.
- What do you mean?
192
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,404
I don't mean to cast aspersions
on a dead guy...
193
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:04,657
...but, uh, Mr. Morality here?
194
00:13:04,825 --> 00:13:06,659
He brought a lot of girls up here.
195
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:08,411
Got more ass than a toilet seat.
196
00:13:11,957 --> 00:13:15,710
One more thing. Uh, this building,
it only has four stories, right?
197
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:19,130
- Yeah.
- So there wouldn't be a Room 669?
198
00:13:19,298 --> 00:13:20,715
Of course not.
199
00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:21,925
Why do you ask?
200
00:13:22,092 --> 00:13:23,593
Ah, just curious.
201
00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:26,095
- Thanks.
Yeah.
202
00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:31,184
Well, no traces of EMF, that's for sure.
203
00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:34,687
And that Room 669 is a load of crap.
204
00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:37,816
So, what do you think,
the professor's just a jumper?
205
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:39,818
- Legend's just a legend?
- I don't know.
206
00:13:39,985 --> 00:13:44,030
I mean, the girl the janitor described,
that's pretty weird.
207
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:45,240
Yeah.
208
00:13:45,407 --> 00:13:47,951
We ought to check out
the history of the building.
209
00:13:48,577 --> 00:13:51,955
- See if any coed ganked herself there.
- Yeah, right.
210
00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:59,587
Dude, were you on my computer?
211
00:14:01,757 --> 00:14:03,049
- No.
- Oh, really?
212
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:07,929
Because it's frozen now
on, uh, bustyasianbeauties.com.
213
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:14,727
Dean-
214
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:19,482
Would you just...
Don't touch my stuff anymore, okay?
215
00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:22,318
Why don't you control your OCD?
216
00:14:22,486 --> 00:14:24,654
But did you dig up anything
about the building?
217
00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:27,657
Or on the suicidal coed?
218
00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:30,785
No. History's clean.
219
00:14:30,953 --> 00:14:33,955
- Then it's not a haunting.
- Maybe not.
220
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:37,166
- To tell you the truth, we're not sure.
- What do you mean you're not sure?
221
00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:40,587
- Well, it's weird.
- What's weird?
222
00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:45,800
This next part, we, uh, didn't see it happen
ourselves exactly...
223
00:14:46,802 --> 00:14:48,970
...but it's pretty frigging weird,
even for us.
224
00:15:47,071 --> 00:15:49,405
- Aliens?
Yeah.
225
00:15:49,573 --> 00:15:51,616
- Aliens?
- Yeah.
226
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:55,912
Even if they are real, they're sure as hell
not coming to Earth and swiping people.
227
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,163
Hey, believe me. We know.
228
00:15:57,331 --> 00:16:01,125
My whole life, I've never found evidence
of an honest-to-God abduction.
229
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:02,794
It's all just cranks and pranks.
230
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,921
Yeah, that's what we thought.
231
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:08,466
But we figured we'd at least
talk to the guy.
232
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:16,641
Hey, you gotta give
those purple nurples a shot.
233
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:17,850
Phew, ha, ha.
234
00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:22,730
So, what happened, Curtis?
235
00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:26,818
You won't believe me. Nobody does.
236
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:28,528
Give us a chance.
237
00:16:28,904 --> 00:16:31,364
I do not want this in the papers.
238
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:32,907
Off the record then.
239
00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,624
I, uh...
240
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:44,127
I blacked out...
241
00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:49,882
...and I lost time and when I woke up,
I don't know where I was.
242
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:56,639
Then what?
243
00:16:58,100 --> 00:17:00,476
They did tests on me.
244
00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,896
And, um...
245
00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:11,946
They, um...
246
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:15,575
They probed me.
247
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:20,121
They probed you?
248
00:17:22,791 --> 00:17:25,793
Yeah, they probed me.
249
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:31,966
Again and again, and again, and...
250
00:17:37,347 --> 00:17:41,726
And again and again, and again,
and then one more time.
251
00:17:42,978 --> 00:17:43,978
Yikes.
252
00:17:45,814 --> 00:17:48,149
No and that's not even the worst of it.
253
00:17:48,317 --> 00:17:50,193
How could it get any worse?
254
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:52,403
Some alien made you his bitch.
255
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:00,787
They...
256
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:04,791
They made me slow dance.
257
00:18:06,835 --> 00:18:08,544
Lady in red
258
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:13,925
Is dancing with me
259
00:18:15,177 --> 00:18:16,803
Cheek to cheek
260
00:18:17,179 --> 00:18:19,680
There's nobody here
261
00:18:23,310 --> 00:18:25,728
It's just you and me
262
00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:38,741
You guys are exaggerating again, huh?
263
00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:39,951
No.
264
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:42,870
Then this frat boy is just nuts.
265
00:18:43,705 --> 00:18:45,665
We're not so sure.
266
00:18:48,836 --> 00:18:50,211
I'm telling you, Dean...
267
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:52,380
...this was made
by some kind of jet engine.
268
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:54,257
What, you mean some
saucer-shaped jet engine?
269
00:18:54,424 --> 00:18:55,591
Well, what else could it be?
270
00:18:56,343 --> 00:18:57,885
- What the hell?
- I don't know.
271
00:18:58,053 --> 00:19:00,304
- No, seriously, dude. What the hell?
- I don't know.
272
00:19:00,472 --> 00:19:02,890
I mean, first the haunting, now this?
273
00:19:03,058 --> 00:19:05,434
The timing alone,
there's gotta be a connection.
274
00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:08,980
You mean, between the angry spirit
and the sexed-up E.T.?
275
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:11,149
What could the connection possibly be?
276
00:19:11,316 --> 00:19:12,567
But what could we do?
277
00:19:12,734 --> 00:19:14,193
So we just kept on digging.
278
00:19:14,361 --> 00:19:17,488
So you and this guy Curtis,
you're in the same house?
279
00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:19,699
- Yeah.
- You heard of what happened to him, right?
280
00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:22,743
Yeah, he says it was aliens,
but, you know, whatever.
281
00:19:23,453 --> 00:19:24,912
Look, man...
282
00:19:25,581 --> 00:19:27,540
...I know this all has to be so hard.
283
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:31,002
- Um, not so much.
- But I want you to know...
284
00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:32,295
...I'm here for you.
285
00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:37,008
You brave little soldier.
286
00:19:38,135 --> 00:19:39,677
I acknowledge your pain.
287
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:44,640
Come here.
288
00:19:48,729 --> 00:19:51,480
You're too precious for this world.
289
00:19:51,648 --> 00:19:52,899
I never said that.
290
00:19:53,066 --> 00:19:55,776
Well, you're always saying
pansy stuff like that.
291
00:19:59,990 --> 00:20:01,699
Well, um...
292
00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:05,286
- Yeah, uh, thanks. Thanks for the hug.
- Yeah.
293
00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:08,873
But, uh, I'm okay. Really.
294
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:11,792
To tell you the truth...
295
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:14,212
...whatever happened to Curtis,
he had it coming.
296
00:20:14,379 --> 00:20:16,631
- Why's that?
- He's our pledge master.
297
00:20:16,798 --> 00:20:20,218
Put us through hell this semester.
Man, he got off on it.
298
00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:22,511
So now he knows how we feel.
299
00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,139
Huh.
300
00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:26,933
It's okay.
301
00:20:28,101 --> 00:20:30,394
It still doesn't make a lick of sense.
302
00:20:30,562 --> 00:20:33,481
But hey, at least there's one connection.
303
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,233
Between what?
304
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,109
Victims.
305
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:39,445
The professor and the frat guy.
306
00:20:39,613 --> 00:20:41,030
Ha, they're both dicks.
307
00:20:41,198 --> 00:20:42,531
That's a connection?
308
00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:45,243
You got anything better to go on,
I'd love to hear it.
309
00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:49,080
- Where's my laptop?
- I don't know.
310
00:20:50,332 --> 00:20:53,209
I mean, think about it.
A philandering professor gets a dead girl.
311
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:54,919
A pledge master gets hazed.
312
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,588
- I left it in here.
- Well, you obviously didn't.
313
00:20:58,340 --> 00:21:01,133
I mean, these punishments,
they're almost poetic.
314
00:21:01,301 --> 00:21:03,302
Actually, it'd be more like a limerick,
but still-
315
00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:06,347
Okay, hilarious, ha, ha.
Where'd you hide it?
316
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:08,182
- Your computer?
- Yeah. Where'd you hide it?
317
00:21:08,350 --> 00:21:10,601
- Why would I take your computer?
- No one else could have.
318
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:13,604
We keep the door locked.
We never let any maids in.
319
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:15,439
Look's like you lost it, Poindexter.
320
00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:23,698
Dude, you know something?
I put up with a lot from you.
321
00:21:23,865 --> 00:21:25,533
What? I'm a joy to be around.
322
00:21:25,701 --> 00:21:27,702
Yeah? Your dirty socks in the sink.
323
00:21:27,869 --> 00:21:30,329
- Your food in the fridge.
- What's wrong with my food?
324
00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:31,706
It's not food anymore, Dean.
325
00:21:31,873 --> 00:21:33,082
- It's Darwinism.
- I like it.
326
00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:37,169
All I ask from you, the one thing,
is that you don't mess with my stuff.
327
00:21:38,380 --> 00:21:39,880
You done?
328
00:21:41,591 --> 00:21:43,968
You know, how would you feel
if I screwed with the Impala?
329
00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:46,304
It'd be the last thing you ever did.
330
00:21:47,931 --> 00:21:50,057
Did you take his computer?
331
00:21:50,225 --> 00:21:51,267
Serves him right, but no.
332
00:21:51,435 --> 00:21:53,728
Well, I didn't lose it
because I don't lose things.
333
00:21:53,895 --> 00:21:55,813
Oh, that's right, yeah,
because he's Mr. Perfect.
334
00:21:55,981 --> 00:21:58,899
Okay, okay. Why don't you just tell me
what happened next?
335
00:22:00,068 --> 00:22:01,110
There was one more victim.
336
00:22:01,278 --> 00:22:03,738
Right. Now, we didn't see this one
ourselves either.
337
00:22:03,905 --> 00:22:07,825
We kind of put it together
from the evidence, but this guy, he was...
338
00:22:07,993 --> 00:22:10,077
He was a research scientist.
339
00:22:10,245 --> 00:22:11,245
Animal testing.
340
00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:15,082
Yeah, you know, a dick.
Which fits the pattern.
341
00:23:18,814 --> 00:23:20,689
The cops didn't release
a cause of death...
342
00:23:20,857 --> 00:23:23,109
...because they had no clue
what the cause was.
343
00:23:23,276 --> 00:23:26,654
So we checked it out ourselves.
344
00:23:35,872 --> 00:23:37,540
Hey.
345
00:23:47,175 --> 00:23:49,343
This ought to be quick.
346
00:23:51,096 --> 00:23:52,847
Bleh.
347
00:23:54,516 --> 00:23:56,016
Okay.
348
00:23:56,184 --> 00:23:57,810
That is just nasty.
349
00:23:57,978 --> 00:23:59,770
Uh, yeah.
350
00:24:01,606 --> 00:24:03,399
Mutilated.
351
00:24:03,692 --> 00:24:05,901
Looks to me like something was hungry.
352
00:24:06,069 --> 00:24:10,531
- They identify him yet?
- Yeah, a research scientist at the college.
353
00:24:10,699 --> 00:24:12,450
- Guess where his office was, by the way?
- Mm?
354
00:24:12,617 --> 00:24:14,410
Crawford Hall, same as the professor.
355
00:24:14,578 --> 00:24:16,787
That's right where the frat boy
had his close encounter.
356
00:24:17,789 --> 00:24:19,290
Yeah.
357
00:24:19,541 --> 00:24:21,584
Hey, grab me the thing, would you?
358
00:24:27,007 --> 00:24:28,549
Thanks.
359
00:24:32,345 --> 00:24:33,596
What is it?
360
00:24:33,763 --> 00:24:35,306
Looks like a...
361
00:24:36,641 --> 00:24:37,892
A belly scale?
362
00:24:38,768 --> 00:24:40,102
A belly scale? From what?
363
00:24:40,270 --> 00:24:41,645
Uh...
364
00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:44,732
An alligator?
365
00:24:46,151 --> 00:24:48,736
An alligator in the sewer? Come on.
366
00:24:48,904 --> 00:24:51,655
What? Well, Dean,
it's a classic urban legend.
367
00:24:51,823 --> 00:24:55,534
A kid flushes a baby gator down the toilet
and it grows huge in the tunnels.
368
00:24:55,702 --> 00:24:58,579
Yeah, but no one's really ever found one.
They're not real.
369
00:24:58,747 --> 00:25:01,665
Well, neither is alien abduction
but something chomped on this guy.
370
00:25:02,626 --> 00:25:05,169
- This couldn't get any weirder.
- Maybe we should get some help.
371
00:25:05,337 --> 00:25:08,255
I'll call Bobby. Maybe he's run into
something like this before.
372
00:25:08,423 --> 00:25:12,718
I'm sure. Just your typical haunted-campus,
alien-abduction, alligator-in-a-sewer gig.
373
00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:14,011
Yeah, it's simple.
374
00:25:14,513 --> 00:25:16,764
We decided to search the sewer anyway.
375
00:25:16,932 --> 00:25:19,767
So we split up,
each taking one end of campus.
376
00:25:19,935 --> 00:25:21,352
Did you find anything?
377
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:24,939
Yeah, I found something.
Just not in the sewer.
378
00:25:40,956 --> 00:25:43,541
Son of a bitch.
379
00:25:56,805 --> 00:25:57,846
Sam!
380
00:26:02,143 --> 00:26:03,978
You think this is funny?
381
00:26:04,145 --> 00:26:05,938
It depends. What?
382
00:26:06,106 --> 00:26:08,357
- Heh, heh. The car.
- What about the car?
383
00:26:08,525 --> 00:26:11,777
You can't let the air out of the tires.
You're gonna bend the rims.
384
00:26:11,945 --> 00:26:14,280
Whoa, wait a minute.
I didn't go near your car.
385
00:26:14,447 --> 00:26:17,491
Oh, yeah. Huh. Then how'd I find this?
386
00:26:23,540 --> 00:26:26,667
- Hey, give me back my money.
- Oh, no. No.
387
00:26:26,835 --> 00:26:29,712
Consider it reparations
for, uh, emotional trauma.
388
00:26:30,297 --> 00:26:33,674
- Yeah, very funny. Now give it back.
- No.
389
00:26:33,842 --> 00:26:36,385
Dean, I have had it up to here with you.
390
00:26:36,553 --> 00:26:38,721
Yeah? Right back at you.
391
00:26:44,561 --> 00:26:46,937
- God, get off me.
- Give it back.
392
00:26:48,898 --> 00:26:50,608
Okay, I've heard enough.
393
00:26:50,775 --> 00:26:52,693
You showed up about an hour after that.
394
00:26:52,861 --> 00:26:56,155
I'm surprised at you two. I really am.
395
00:26:56,323 --> 00:27:00,326
Sam, first off,
Dean did not steal your computer.
396
00:27:00,493 --> 00:27:02,202
- But I- There's-
- Shh.
397
00:27:02,704 --> 00:27:05,372
And, Dean, Sam did not touch your car.
398
00:27:05,915 --> 00:27:06,957
Yeah.
399
00:27:07,125 --> 00:27:10,044
And if you two bothered to pull your heads
out of your asses...
400
00:27:10,211 --> 00:27:11,712
...it all would've been pretty clear.
401
00:27:12,297 --> 00:27:14,256
- What?
- What you're dealing with.
402
00:27:17,510 --> 00:27:18,552
Uh...
403
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:19,928
- I got nothing.
- Me neither.
404
00:27:20,096 --> 00:27:21,555
You got a trickster on your hands.
405
00:27:22,932 --> 00:27:24,725
- That's what I thought.
- What? No you didn't-
406
00:27:24,893 --> 00:27:26,310
Well, I gotta tell you...
407
00:27:26,978 --> 00:27:29,063
...you guys were the biggest clue.
408
00:27:29,230 --> 00:27:30,356
What do you mean?
409
00:27:30,899 --> 00:27:34,735
These things create chaos and mischief
as easy as breathing.
410
00:27:34,903 --> 00:27:36,862
And it's got you so turned around...
411
00:27:37,030 --> 00:27:39,823
...and at each other's throats,
you can't even think straight.
412
00:27:39,991 --> 00:27:41,700
- The laptop.
- The tires.
413
00:27:41,868 --> 00:27:43,619
It knows you're onto him.
414
00:27:44,329 --> 00:27:47,081
And it's been playing you like fiddles.
415
00:27:47,248 --> 00:27:50,501
So, what is it? Spirit, demon, what?
416
00:27:50,669 --> 00:27:53,504
Well, more like demigods, really.
417
00:27:53,672 --> 00:27:55,422
There's Loki in Scandinavia.
418
00:27:55,590 --> 00:27:58,926
There's Anansi in West Africa.
Dozens of them.
419
00:27:59,094 --> 00:28:02,096
They're immortal and they can create things
out of thin air.
420
00:28:02,263 --> 00:28:04,973
Things as real as you and me.
Make them vanish just as quick.
421
00:28:05,141 --> 00:28:08,435
You mean, like an angry spirit
or an alien, or an alligator.
422
00:28:08,603 --> 00:28:10,270
The victims fit the m.o. too.
423
00:28:10,438 --> 00:28:12,356
Tricksters target
the high and the mighty.
424
00:28:12,524 --> 00:28:15,150
Knock them down a peg,
usually with a sense of humor.
425
00:28:15,318 --> 00:28:16,985
Deadly pranks, things like that.
426
00:28:18,029 --> 00:28:20,322
Bobby, what do these things look like?
427
00:28:21,324 --> 00:28:23,575
Lots of things, but human mostly.
428
00:28:26,329 --> 00:28:29,373
And what human do we know
who's been at ground zero this whole time?
429
00:28:40,218 --> 00:28:41,760
Oh, that's a good one.
430
00:28:51,062 --> 00:28:52,354
Come here.
431
00:28:54,315 --> 00:28:58,277
Could you eat? I could eat. Come on.
432
00:29:10,623 --> 00:29:12,833
Something's missing.
433
00:29:16,963 --> 00:29:18,005
Mm!
434
00:29:36,357 --> 00:29:39,151
Sorry I'm dragging
a little ass today, boys.
435
00:29:39,319 --> 00:29:40,903
I had quite the night last night.
436
00:29:42,322 --> 00:29:44,907
Lots of sex, if you catch my drift.
437
00:29:45,658 --> 00:29:47,701
Yeah, hard not to.
Listen, we won't be long.
438
00:29:47,869 --> 00:29:50,245
We just need to check a couple offices
up on three.
439
00:29:50,413 --> 00:29:52,206
No problem.
440
00:29:53,416 --> 00:29:57,211
Oh, damn.
I forgot something in the truck.
441
00:29:57,378 --> 00:29:59,421
You know what?
I'll catch up with you guys.
442
00:29:59,589 --> 00:30:01,131
Okay.
443
00:30:47,512 --> 00:30:49,346
Just because he reads
Weekly World News...
444
00:30:49,514 --> 00:30:51,306
...doesn't mean he's our guy.
You read it too.
445
00:30:51,474 --> 00:30:53,267
I'm telling you, it's him.
446
00:30:53,434 --> 00:30:55,978
I just think we need some hard proof.
That's all.
447
00:30:56,145 --> 00:30:59,273
Okay, Bobby mentioned that these suckers
have a metabolism like an insect.
448
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:00,607
All right, a real sweet tooth.
449
00:31:00,775 --> 00:31:03,443
I didn't find any candy bars or sugar.
Not even Equal.
450
00:31:03,611 --> 00:31:05,362
- You missed something.
- I don't miss things.
451
00:31:05,530 --> 00:31:07,739
Oh, right because you're Mr. Perfect.
452
00:31:08,658 --> 00:31:11,618
What? Are you still pissed at me
because of what the trickster did?
453
00:31:11,786 --> 00:31:15,664
Oh, come on, man. You been a tight ass
long before that trickster showed up.
454
00:31:19,377 --> 00:31:21,837
Look, just stay here.
Keep an eye on the janitor.
455
00:31:22,005 --> 00:31:24,298
I'll go to his place,
see if I can find any evidence...
456
00:31:24,465 --> 00:31:27,259
...before you go barging in
and staking the man.
457
00:31:28,136 --> 00:31:30,345
Just wait till I get back, okay?
458
00:31:30,513 --> 00:31:32,139
- Okay?
- Okay.
459
00:32:10,470 --> 00:32:11,511
Ah, screw this.
460
00:33:12,782 --> 00:33:15,492
There's many times that we've loved
461
00:33:15,952 --> 00:33:18,912
We've shared love and made love
462
00:33:21,082 --> 00:33:23,917
It doesn't seem to me like it's enough
463
00:33:25,837 --> 00:33:27,546
There's just not enough of it
464
00:33:28,673 --> 00:33:30,424
There's just not enough
465
00:33:31,300 --> 00:33:33,427
Oh, oh, babe
466
00:33:34,429 --> 00:33:35,470
Not really
467
00:33:36,347 --> 00:33:38,765
My darling, I
468
00:33:39,892 --> 00:33:42,644
Can't get enough of your love, babe
469
00:33:44,772 --> 00:33:48,066
Girl, I don't know
I don't know why
470
00:33:48,526 --> 00:33:51,737
Can't get enough of your love, babe
471
00:33:52,780 --> 00:33:54,948
We've been waiting for you, Dean.
472
00:33:56,951 --> 00:33:59,453
You guys aren't real.
473
00:33:59,620 --> 00:34:02,122
Trust me, sugar, it's gonna feel real.
474
00:34:02,290 --> 00:34:03,999
Ha.
475
00:34:04,167 --> 00:34:06,877
Come on. Let us give you a massage.
476
00:34:07,670 --> 00:34:09,337
Wha...?
477
00:34:10,339 --> 00:34:14,509
You know, I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
Really, I am...
478
00:34:14,677 --> 00:34:18,180
...but I'm gonna have to pass.
479
00:34:18,347 --> 00:34:19,765
Aww.
480
00:34:19,932 --> 00:34:21,391
They're a peace offering.
481
00:34:23,936 --> 00:34:25,771
I know what you and your brother do.
482
00:34:26,564 --> 00:34:30,025
I've been around a while,
run into your kind before.
483
00:34:30,651 --> 00:34:33,862
Well, then you know that I can't let you
just keep hurting people.
484
00:34:35,156 --> 00:34:37,074
Come on.
485
00:34:37,241 --> 00:34:39,910
Those people got what was coming
to them.
486
00:34:40,078 --> 00:34:41,620
Hoisted on their own petards.
487
00:34:42,580 --> 00:34:48,126
But you and Sam, I like you. I do.
488
00:34:48,753 --> 00:34:52,005
So treat yourself, long as you want.
489
00:34:52,173 --> 00:34:56,218
Just long enough for me
to move on to the next town.
490
00:34:58,513 --> 00:35:02,766
- Yeah, I don't think I can let you do that.
- I don't wanna hurt you.
491
00:35:03,851 --> 00:35:05,227
And you know that I can.
492
00:35:05,394 --> 00:35:09,773
Look, man, I gotta tell you,
I dig your style. All right? I mean-
493
00:35:11,192 --> 00:35:15,153
I do, I mean, phew.
And the slow-dancing alien?
494
00:35:18,366 --> 00:35:20,450
- One of my personal favorites.
- Yeah.
495
00:35:20,618 --> 00:35:23,829
- But I can't let you go.
- Too bad.
496
00:35:24,372 --> 00:35:25,789
Like I said, I liked you.
497
00:35:26,541 --> 00:35:28,583
Sam was right.
498
00:35:30,086 --> 00:35:31,878
You shouldn't have come alone.
499
00:35:33,047 --> 00:35:35,298
Well, I'll agree with you there.
500
00:35:44,183 --> 00:35:48,270
That fight you guys had outside,
that was a trick?
501
00:35:50,356 --> 00:35:52,023
Hmm.
502
00:35:52,733 --> 00:35:54,568
Not bad.
503
00:35:57,238 --> 00:35:59,531
But you wanna see a real trick?
504
00:36:22,805 --> 00:36:23,847
Ahh!
Ooh!
505
00:36:32,064 --> 00:36:34,191
Ooh.
Unh!
506
00:36:37,612 --> 00:36:39,112
Whoa!
Ahh!
507
00:36:40,114 --> 00:36:42,741
Ha! Nice toss, ladies.
508
00:36:43,451 --> 00:36:45,160
Nice show.
509
00:36:48,372 --> 00:36:49,664
Dean.
510
00:36:49,832 --> 00:36:52,834
Dean, Dean, Dean.
I did not wanna have to do this.
511
00:36:57,089 --> 00:36:58,173
Me neither.
512
00:37:22,740 --> 00:37:24,491
You guys okay?
513
00:37:25,493 --> 00:37:26,618
Yeah.
514
00:37:28,246 --> 00:37:29,454
I guess.
515
00:37:29,622 --> 00:37:31,706
Well, I gotta say...
516
00:37:32,291 --> 00:37:33,333
...he had style.
517
00:37:40,383 --> 00:37:42,759
- Bobby, thanks a lot. We couldn't have-
- Hey, save it.
518
00:37:42,927 --> 00:37:45,637
Let's just get the hell out of Dodge
before somebody finds that body.
519
00:37:45,805 --> 00:37:47,222
Yeah.
520
00:37:48,391 --> 00:37:50,058
Look, Dean, um...
521
00:37:50,226 --> 00:37:53,061
...I just wanna say that I'm, uh...
522
00:37:53,229 --> 00:37:54,688
Um...
523
00:37:56,023 --> 00:37:57,065
Hey.
524
00:37:59,694 --> 00:38:01,236
Me too.
525
00:38:04,115 --> 00:38:07,492
You guys are breaking my heart.
Could we please just leave?
526
00:38:08,115 --> 00:38:57,492
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