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1
00:00:01,435 --> 00:00:04,165
(Beth Thornley's
"You're So Pony" playing)
2
00:00:07,408 --> 00:00:08,778
* LET'S SAY I WANT IT *
3
00:00:08,842 --> 00:00:11,252
* LET'S SAY
I WANT WHAT'S OVER THERE *
4
00:00:11,312 --> 00:00:12,812
(Tessa) THE LOOK OF ENVY--
5
00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,850
IT WAS A LOOK DALIA WAS
WELL-ACCUSTOMED TO RECEIVING.
6
00:00:15,916 --> 00:00:18,046
ME--NOT SO MUCH...
7
00:00:18,119 --> 00:00:19,519
PICK YOU UP AFTER SCHOOL?
8
00:00:19,587 --> 00:00:20,787
OKAY.
UNTIL NOW.
9
00:00:20,854 --> 00:00:22,194
NOSE KISS?
10
00:00:22,256 --> 00:00:23,816
* SO, BABY, WHAT I KNOW,
THERE'S NO STOP *
11
00:00:23,891 --> 00:00:27,801
SCOTT STRAUSS HAD CHOSEN ME
OVER DALIA, AND IT WAS BIG.
12
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,331
BYE.
13
00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:30,497
BYE.
14
00:00:30,564 --> 00:00:32,234
NO. IT WAS HUGE.
15
00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:33,570
(indistinct conversations)
16
00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:36,574
IT'S LIKE NEW YORK
ALL OVER AGAIN. (sighs)
17
00:00:36,637 --> 00:00:40,237
THE PROBLEM DIDN'T GO AWAY.
IT JUST GOT BIGGER. (chuckles)
18
00:00:40,308 --> 00:00:41,538
THAT WAS A REFERENCE
TO SCOTT'S--
19
00:00:41,609 --> 00:00:44,079
CORRECT.
20
00:00:44,145 --> 00:00:46,545
YOUR DAUGHTER HAS
A VORACIOUS SEXUAL APPETITE.
21
00:00:46,614 --> 00:00:49,484
SHE'S GOT A HUNGER FOR THE FLESH
THAT CAN'T BE SATIATED.
22
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,650
YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER.
HOW CAN YOU JOKE LIKE THIS?
23
00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:54,689
(chuckles) BECAUSE SHE'S
NOT SEXUALLY ACTIVE.
24
00:00:54,755 --> 00:00:57,855
SHE'S AN ACADEMIC...
LIKE HER MOTHER.
25
00:00:57,925 --> 00:00:59,055
I KNOW IT'S NOT MY CHOICE.
26
00:00:59,127 --> 00:01:01,227
I JUST DON'T WANT TESSA
TO TREAT SEX
27
00:01:01,295 --> 00:01:03,125
AS A RECREATIONAL HOBBY.
28
00:01:03,197 --> 00:01:05,797
WELL,
HAVE YOU TOLD HER THAT?
29
00:01:05,866 --> 00:01:07,636
I... TRIED TO.
30
00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:10,241
(crunching)
31
00:01:11,305 --> 00:01:12,905
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED
TO DO NOW?
32
00:01:12,973 --> 00:01:14,243
I CAN'T KEEP RELOCATING HER
33
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:17,208
EVERY TIME
I FIND CONDOMS, CAN I?
34
00:01:17,278 --> 00:01:19,508
I MEAN, I COULD.
WE HAVE THE MILES.
35
00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:21,780
Captioned by
Closed Captioning Services, Inc.
36
00:01:21,849 --> 00:01:27,019
(Alih Jay) * LAST NIGHT I HAD
A PLEASANT NIGHTMARE *
37
00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:30,117
* DA-DA-DA-DA,
DA, DA, DA, DA *
38
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:32,431
NAMASTE, YOU GUYS.
39
00:01:32,493 --> 00:01:35,433
I JUST HAD
A TANTRIC MANI-PEDI.
40
00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:39,726
OH! UH, MOON OVER MIAMI VICE
VERSA MY FAVORITE SONG?
41
00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:40,930
HOW DID YOU KNOW?
42
00:01:41,001 --> 00:01:41,771
I KNOW.
43
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:44,205
OHH. IT WAS ORGASMIC.
44
00:01:44,272 --> 00:01:45,612
THAT IS THE PROBLEM
WITH CHATSWIN.
45
00:01:45,673 --> 00:01:47,813
EVERYTHING OUT HERE HAS
TO BE SEXUALIZED.
46
00:01:47,875 --> 00:01:50,235
GEORGE IS ANGRY
ABOUT HIS DAUGHTER'S LIBIDO.
47
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:52,381
(gasps) OH.
DALIA GOT HORNY EARLY,
48
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,346
SO WE HAD THE SEX TALK
YEARS AGO.
49
00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:55,875
I WOULDN'T WAIT, GEORGE.
50
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,249
TO HAVE THE SEX TALK?
(chuckles)
51
00:01:57,318 --> 00:01:59,218
YEAH, I THINK TESSA KNOWS
WHERE BABIES COME FROM.
52
00:01:59,287 --> 00:02:00,487
I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT
THAT SEX TALK.
53
00:02:00,554 --> 00:02:02,264
I'M TALKING ABOUT THE ONE
WHERE YOU EXPLAIN
54
00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,493
ALL THE DIFFERENT KINDS
OF SEX.
55
00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:06,188
DIFFERENT KINDS OF--
BREAKUP, MAKEUP,
56
00:02:06,260 --> 00:02:08,300
GIRL-ON-GIRL,
GROUP-ON-GUY...
57
00:02:08,362 --> 00:02:12,202
HATE SEX, DATE SEX, PITY SEX,
PARTY SEX, PITY PARTY SEX.
58
00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:14,436
BI-CURIOUS, BY THE OCEAN...
BY THE HOUR.
59
00:02:14,502 --> 00:02:15,902
THE REVERSE ANDRE THE GIANT.
60
00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:17,509
NO. TESSA IS NOT DOING
ANY OF THAT.
61
00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:20,171
WELL, SHE'S GOING TO,
IF SHE HASN'T ALREADY, GEORGE,
62
00:02:20,241 --> 00:02:21,311
AND YOU CAN'T STOP HER.
63
00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:23,405
I SURE CAN. IT'S SIMPLE.
64
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:24,907
IF I WANT TO KEEP TESSA
AWAY FROM BOYS,
65
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:26,008
ALL I HAVE TO DO IS FIND
66
00:02:26,079 --> 00:02:29,519
SOMETHING MORE FUN
THAN HAVING SEX.
67
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:31,593
JENGA! (laughs)
68
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:32,892
* YOU TAKE
A BLOCK FROM THE BOTTOM *
69
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:34,123
* AND YOU PUT IT ON TOP
70
00:02:34,188 --> 00:02:35,418
* YOU TAKE
A BLOCK FROM THE MIDDLE *
71
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,429
* AND YOU PUT IT ON TOP
72
00:02:38,626 --> 00:02:40,186
WELL, WE'VE GOT OTHER GAMES.
73
00:02:40,261 --> 00:02:42,761
YOU GUYS READY FOR
A GOOD OLD-FASHIONED GAME NIGHT,
74
00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:43,900
OR WHAT?
75
00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:45,404
I CUT MY TEETH
ON CHUTES AND LADDERS,
76
00:02:45,466 --> 00:02:48,636
OR "SNAKES AND LADDERS,"
AS IT'S CALLED ON THE STREETS,
77
00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:50,772
BUT, UH, I'M UP
FOR ANYTHING.
78
00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:52,908
I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION
THAT TESSA WOULD BE HERE.
79
00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:54,283
YEAH, WE'RE GONNA SURPRISE HER.
80
00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:57,782
HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS, LIFE,
YAHTZEE, CONNECT 4...
81
00:02:57,845 --> 00:02:59,305
OH, WHAT ABOUT MONOPOLY?
82
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:00,350
YOU'RE A PURIST.
83
00:03:00,414 --> 00:03:02,724
RESPECT, BUT I GOTTA BE
THE BOOT.
84
00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:03,653
(door opens)
SURPRISE!
85
00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:04,947
WHOA.
86
00:03:06,554 --> 00:03:09,094
UH, SURPRISE...
YOU'RE HANGING OUT
87
00:03:09,156 --> 00:03:12,986
WITH MY FRIENDS
WHEN I'M NOT HOME?
88
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,160
YEP.
89
00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:16,098
FOR THE RECORD,
I SAID THIS WAS WEIRD.
90
00:03:16,163 --> 00:03:17,733
OH, DAD,
THIS IS SCOTT STRAUSS.
91
00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:20,398
OH. HELLO, SCOTT.
YOU--YOU PLAY YAHTZEE?
92
00:03:20,468 --> 00:03:21,298
YOU SAID
WE WERE PLAYING MONOPOLY.
93
00:03:21,369 --> 00:03:22,599
I JUST SET UP THE BANK.
94
00:03:22,670 --> 00:03:24,200
ACTUALLY, SCOTT AND I HAVE
DINNER PLANS, SO...
95
00:03:24,272 --> 00:03:27,312
OH. OKAY. "DINNER PLANS."
"SCOTT AND I."
96
00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:30,105
"ACTUALLY." (chuckles)
HOW GROWN-UP.
97
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:31,277
SCOTT, CAN YOU WAIT
OUTSIDE?
98
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:32,875
I THINK MY DAD'S HAVING
A STROKE.
99
00:03:32,946 --> 00:03:34,646
SURE THING.
NICE MEETING YOU, MR. ALTMAN.
100
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,345
YES, VERY NICE MEETING YOU, TOO.
HEY.
101
00:03:36,417 --> 00:03:37,987
AHEM.
GET IT.
102
00:03:39,387 --> 00:03:40,117
WHAT WAS THAT?
103
00:03:40,187 --> 00:03:41,217
WHAT WAS WHAT?
104
00:03:41,289 --> 00:03:42,959
WHAT DID YOU JUST TELL HIM
TO GET?
105
00:03:43,023 --> 00:03:44,193
DAD, WHAT IS WRONG
WITH YOU?
106
00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:45,788
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
NOTHING.
107
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:48,099
(chuckles) I'M BEHAVING
VERY NORMALLY. IT'S FRIDAY.
108
00:03:48,161 --> 00:03:50,931
I'M GOING ON AN AGE-APPROPRIATE
DATE WITH A CUTE BOY.
109
00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:53,968
YOU'RE A GROWN MAN HOME PLAYING
PICTIONARY WITH MINORS.
110
00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:03,609
THE YOGURT MAY HAVE BEEN
FLOWING THAT NIGHT,
111
00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:06,347
BUT THE CONVERSATION
BETWEEN ME AND SCOTT WAS
112
00:04:06,414 --> 00:04:08,524
AS STALE
AS THAT CRUSHED COOKIE TOPPING.
113
00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:10,822
ALL THE KID EVER TALKED ABOUT
WAS HOW HE VOLUNTEERED
114
00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:12,554
FOR A YEAR IN ZAMBIA.
115
00:04:12,620 --> 00:04:14,890
I WISH I COULD HAVE
TAKEN YOU FOR BAMBARA.
116
00:04:14,955 --> 00:04:17,115
IT'S THIS DISH I USED TO EAT
WHEN I WAS LIVING IN--
117
00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:18,530
LET ME GUESS IT. ZAMBIA?
118
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:20,432
(chuckles) YEAH.
OHH.
119
00:04:20,494 --> 00:04:22,464
(smacks table)
TOO BAD WE CAN'T HAVE IT,
120
00:04:22,530 --> 00:04:25,070
'CAUSE WE'RE NOT IN ZAMBIA.
121
00:04:25,132 --> 00:04:27,502
WE'RE IN... CHATSWIN.
122
00:04:27,568 --> 00:04:28,738
I KNOW THAT.
DO YOU?
123
00:04:28,802 --> 00:04:30,042
YEAH.
124
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:33,243
IN ZAMBIA IN THE SUMMERTIME,
IT GETS SURPRISINGLY COLD.
125
00:04:33,307 --> 00:04:34,507
DID YOU EVER SEE...
(smacks table)
126
00:04:34,575 --> 00:04:36,305
THIS INTERNET VIDEO
127
00:04:36,377 --> 00:04:40,107
OF THIS KID COMING HOME
FROM THE DENTIST
128
00:04:40,180 --> 00:04:42,150
AFTER HE HAS HAD
TOO MUCH ANESTHESIA?
129
00:04:42,215 --> 00:04:43,375
NO.
130
00:04:43,451 --> 00:04:47,491
IT'S FUNNY.
I LOVE FUNNY STUFF.
131
00:04:49,357 --> 00:04:50,257
(laughs) YOU?
132
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:52,434
YEAH.
133
00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:53,733
IT'S JUST HARD TO LAUGH,
YOU KNOW,
134
00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:55,964
WHEN YOU KNOW THAT
PEOPLE ARE STARVING...
135
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:01,065
IN ZAMBIA.
136
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:02,204
ARE YOU GONNA FINISH THAT?
137
00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:04,039
I WILL NOW. YEAH.
138
00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:05,574
I'M THINKING ABOUT
GOING BACK NEXT SUMMER.
139
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:08,539
(mouth full) YOU SHOULD.
YOU SHOULD GO.
140
00:05:08,609 --> 00:05:09,779
IS EVERYTHING OKAY, TESSA?
141
00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:12,053
NO. EVERYTHING WAS NOT OKAY.
142
00:05:12,112 --> 00:05:14,722
I WAS SICK OF HEARING
ABOUT SCOTT'S ONE ADVENTURE,
143
00:05:14,782 --> 00:05:16,722
AND I PROBABLY WOULD HAVE
DUMPED HIM AT THAT VERY MOMENT,
144
00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,394
HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR THE WAR
145
00:05:18,452 --> 00:05:19,792
I WAS WAGING AGAINST DALIA.
(door bells jingle)
146
00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:21,363
KISS ME, SCOTT.
147
00:05:21,422 --> 00:05:22,992
KISS ME LIKE I'M AFRICA.
148
00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:28,127
MMM.
149
00:05:28,195 --> 00:05:30,625
MMM! MM.
150
00:05:30,698 --> 00:05:32,768
MMM. MM.
151
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:33,773
BUY A HOTEL.
152
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,774
OH, WE WILL.
153
00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,837
WE WILL!
154
00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:40,336
(singsongy)
JUST GOT ANOTHER HOTEL.
155
00:05:40,408 --> 00:05:42,078
MALIK'S STILL IN JAIL.
156
00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:43,412
SORRY, MALIK.
157
00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:45,347
YOU DON'T SEEM SORRY.
158
00:05:45,413 --> 00:05:46,613
CAN I TOP YOU GUYS OFF?
159
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,150
YES, PLEASE.
I NEVER GET SODA AT HOME.
160
00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:50,716
SHE'S HAD ENOUGH.
(chuckles)
161
00:05:50,784 --> 00:05:52,524
(dice clatter)
162
00:05:52,586 --> 00:05:54,616
AW, I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU,
TOO.
163
00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:59,028
WOW. 8:45. I WAS SURE TESSA
AND SCOTT WOULD BE HOME BY NOW.
164
00:05:59,092 --> 00:06:01,862
(dice clatter)
165
00:06:01,929 --> 00:06:03,429
WHAT DO YOU THINK
THEY MIGHT BE DOING?
166
00:06:03,497 --> 00:06:05,527
I MEAN, I MEAN, YOU KNOW,
167
00:06:05,599 --> 00:06:07,539
WHAT DO YOU GUYS
GENERALLY DO
168
00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,941
WITH YOUR DATES?
169
00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:11,973
WELL, THEORETICALLY,
I WOULD TAKE MY LOVER
170
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:15,479
UP TO MT. JULIAN AND SHARE
A SOFT CHEESE FROM WISCONSIN.
171
00:06:15,543 --> 00:06:17,383
THEY'RE JUST AS GOOD
AS THE ONES FROM FRANCE
172
00:06:17,445 --> 00:06:19,105
BUT MORE AFFORDABLE.
173
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:21,819
THEN WE WOULD SIT UP THERE
TILL THE SUN CAME UP
174
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:24,422
AND TALK ABOUT OUR HOPES
AND DREAMS
175
00:06:24,485 --> 00:06:27,515
AND "DANCING WITH THE STARS."
176
00:06:27,588 --> 00:06:28,888
I'D PROBABLY LIKE TO GO
SOMEWHERE DARK
177
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:30,556
SO WE COULD MAKE OUT.
MAKE OUT.
178
00:06:30,624 --> 00:06:32,694
YEAH. SURE.
I'M DOWN WITH THAT?
179
00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:35,630
THAT'S--YEAH. GET IT.
180
00:06:35,696 --> 00:06:37,966
SO WHAT ABOUT INTERCOURSE?
181
00:06:40,968 --> 00:06:42,668
CAN I CALL MY MOM
TO COME GET ME?
182
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:46,866
I MEAN, TYPICALLY, WHAT AGE
DO KIDS... PARTAKE NOWADAYS?
183
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:50,210
THAT'S OKAY, MALIK.
I'LL ANSWER THIS ONE.
184
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:51,647
MR. ALTMAN,
185
00:06:51,712 --> 00:06:54,722
THE RIGHT AGE DEPENDS
ON THE INDIVIDUAL.
186
00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:56,422
AND EACH INDIVIDUAL
CAN DETERMINE
187
00:06:56,484 --> 00:06:57,724
WHAT THAT PROPER AGE IS
188
00:06:57,785 --> 00:07:01,715
BY CONSULTING
THE ONLINE VIRGINITY CALCULATOR.
189
00:07:01,789 --> 00:07:03,189
IT'S NOT A REAL THING.
190
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,656
YOU ENTER YOUR HEIGHT, WEIGHT,
HAIR LENGTH, AND ZIP CODE.
191
00:07:05,726 --> 00:07:09,456
IT'LL TELL YOU
WHEN YOU'RE READY. 18.
192
00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:13,570
16. BUT I CAN WAIT.
193
00:07:13,634 --> 00:07:16,174
(door creaks)
194
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:26,952
(clears throat)
195
00:07:27,014 --> 00:07:30,084
COME ON, 21.
196
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:32,120
LET'S GO, 21.
197
00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:35,655
HERE WE GO. 21.
198
00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:39,485
16?
199
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:42,130
SHE'S 16 RIGHT NOW.
200
00:07:45,432 --> 00:07:47,502
WHAT IF I MADE HER
GET A HAIRCUT?
201
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:50,769
THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR MAKING A HOUSE CALL
202
00:07:50,838 --> 00:07:52,538
TO PICK UP
OUR DRY CLEANING.
203
00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:55,006
AH, THE CLUB MAKES EVERYTHING
SO CONVENIENT.
204
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:57,135
DID YOU KNOW WE HAVE
A PEDIATRIC UROLOGIST
205
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:58,080
STARTING NEXT WEEK?
206
00:07:58,145 --> 00:08:00,345
I DID NOT!
207
00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,323
SUPER DUPER.
208
00:08:02,382 --> 00:08:03,982
DON'T FORGET TO CHECK
THE POCKETS.
209
00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:07,891
OH, LET'S SEE IF WE CAN'T FIND
SOME EXTRA TIP MONEY FOR YOU.
210
00:08:10,924 --> 00:08:12,134
OH, DEAR.
211
00:08:12,192 --> 00:08:13,762
ARE YOU KIDDING ME, JAVIER?
212
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,797
ARE YOU KIDDING ME
RIGHT NOW?
213
00:08:15,863 --> 00:08:17,233
I-I DON'T KNOW WHAT--
214
00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:20,897
LOOK AT THIS THING!
IT'S AN M/L! AN M/L.
215
00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:24,608
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY
HOURS I SPEND AT THE GYM
216
00:08:24,672 --> 00:08:27,342
KEEPING IT TIGHT SO HE CAN
GET DOWN WITH AN M/L?!
217
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:28,477
(gasps)
(Yakult barks)
218
00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:31,442
THAT IS IT!
THAT IS THE LAST STRAW!
219
00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:34,351
IT'LL ALL BE READY
BY TUESDAY.
220
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:36,684
AND GIVE ME BACK
THEM GIANT PANTIES!
221
00:08:49,763 --> 00:08:51,263
MORNING, DAD.
OH, HEY.
222
00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:54,431
I'M GONNA HEAD OVER
TO LISA'S IN A MINUTE.
YEAH?
223
00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:56,701
SHE INVITED ME
TO SLEEP OVER TONIGHT.
224
00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:58,640
I FEEL LIKE I HAVEN'T
SEEN YOU MUCH.
225
00:08:58,706 --> 00:09:01,106
I KNOW, BUT I FEEL LIKE
LISA'S FEELING NEGLECTED
226
00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:03,744
'CAUSE I'VE BEEN SPENDING
SO MUCH TIME WITH SCOTT.
227
00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:06,612
SO IS IT COOL?
228
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:10,380
YEAH. IT'S COOL.
229
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:11,790
IT'S VERY COOL.
230
00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:16,422
BUT... BEFORE YOU GO, I...
231
00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:19,689
THOUGHT YOU'D PROBABLY
WANT THESE.
232
00:09:19,760 --> 00:09:21,130
I DON'T THINK
LISA AND I NEED THOSE.
233
00:09:21,194 --> 00:09:22,734
I'M RETURNING THEM TO YOU.
THEY'RE YOURS.
234
00:09:22,796 --> 00:09:24,356
NO, THEY'RE NOT.
FOUND 'EM IN YOUR ROOM.
235
00:09:24,431 --> 00:09:25,731
SO YOU WERE GOING
THROUGH MY ROOM?
236
00:09:25,799 --> 00:09:27,839
NO, NO, I WAS IN THERE
TO TURN OFF THE MUSIC,
237
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,441
AND THEN I SAW 'EM...
IN A BOX...
238
00:09:30,503 --> 00:09:32,043
WHICH I OPENED.
239
00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:35,175
SO HERE WE ARE,
BACK TO SQUARE ONE.
240
00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:36,042
I COULD SAY THE SAME THING.
241
00:09:36,109 --> 00:09:37,979
GEORGE,
THOSE WERE GIVEN TO ME.
242
00:09:38,045 --> 00:09:41,575
SAFE SEX FAIRY?
WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER?
YOU KNOW WHAT?
243
00:09:41,649 --> 00:09:43,249
THINK WHAT
YOU WANNA THINK.
244
00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:50,458
TRUST ME WHEN I TELL YOU
YOU WILL REGRET IT
245
00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:51,833
IF YOU HAVE CASUAL SEX.
246
00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:53,232
IT'S NOT A CASUAL THING.
247
00:09:53,293 --> 00:09:56,233
IT'S SOMETHING YOU SHARE
WITH THE RIGHT PERSON.
248
00:09:56,296 --> 00:09:57,826
IS HE THE RIGHT PERSON?
249
00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:01,940
GOOD-BYE GEORGE,
I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW.
250
00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:04,102
TALK TO ME.
YEAH, WELL,
THAT'S SOMETHING YOU EARN,
251
00:10:04,171 --> 00:10:04,971
NOT DEMAND.
252
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:07,038
TESSA!
YOU TREAT ME LIKE A CHILD!
253
00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:09,337
I DO NOT TREAT YOU
LIKE A CHILD!
254
00:10:12,412 --> 00:10:14,482
YOU FORGOT YOUR SQUISHY.
255
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:17,477
(sighs) THANKS AGAIN FOR COMING
IN ON A SATURDAY, AARON.
256
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:19,820
OH, PLEASE, COME ON, COME ON,
COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.
257
00:10:19,887 --> 00:10:22,017
DON'T BE STUPID.
(smacking lips)
258
00:10:22,089 --> 00:10:23,919
I'D DO ANYTHING FOR YOU,
DALLAS.
259
00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:26,761
I MEAN, YOU'RE A CLIENT,
BUT YOU'RE ALSO A FRIEND.
260
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:30,897
AND ALSO... (slurps)
I WAS COMING IN ANYWAY.
261
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,834
STEVEN FREAKS OUT
OVER NOTHIN'.
262
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:35,340
HE FREAKS OUT IF I WEAR
MY SHOES IN THE HOUSE,
263
00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:38,142
BUT I'M SUPPOSED TO TURN
THE OTHER CHEEK ON THESE?
264
00:10:38,205 --> 00:10:40,365
THESE PANTIES ARE
A SLAP IN THE FACE, AARON.
265
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:41,340
LOOK, LOOK,
266
00:10:41,408 --> 00:10:42,808
STEVEN IS NOT A SAINT.
267
00:10:42,876 --> 00:10:45,076
WE'VE BEEN DOWN THIS ROAD
BEFORE.
268
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,305
BUT HE'S
AN EXCELLENT PROVIDER.
269
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:50,320
SO YOU HAVE TO ASK YOURSELF
THIS QUESTION.
270
00:10:50,383 --> 00:10:52,553
IS THIS A REALLY BIG PROBLEM
271
00:10:52,619 --> 00:10:55,119
OR A YOU-CAN-LIVE-WITH-IT
PROBLEM?
272
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:58,088
IS IT HUGE,
OR IS IT JUST M/L?
273
00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:00,558
OF COURSE, ONCE YOU
SERVE HIM THE PAPERS,
274
00:11:00,627 --> 00:11:02,927
THE PAPERS
CAN'T BE UNSERVED.
275
00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:07,673
OKAY.
276
00:11:09,469 --> 00:11:12,139
BUT I'D LIKE TO SUBMIT THESE
INTO EVIDENCE.
277
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:18,148
HE'S JUST BECOME
SO CONTROLLING.
SCOTT?
278
00:11:18,211 --> 00:11:20,881
GEORGE. AND THAT--THAT'S GOTTEN
TO THE POINT
279
00:11:20,948 --> 00:11:22,718
WHERE I CAN'T EVEN STAND
THE SOUND OF HIS VOICE.
280
00:11:22,783 --> 00:11:24,283
GEORGE.
SCOTT!
281
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,691
TESSA, WHY DON'T YOU JUST
TELL YOUR DAD NOTHING HAPPENED
282
00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:28,194
BETWEEN YOU AND SCOTT?
283
00:11:28,255 --> 00:11:29,655
THEN HE'LL GET OFF
YOUR CASE.
284
00:11:29,723 --> 00:11:35,133
NO. TOO KIND.
I WANT GEORGE TO SWEAT IT OUT.
285
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:38,095
MAYBE I'LL EVEN FAKE A PREGNANCY
LIKE KENZIE DID.
286
00:11:38,165 --> 00:11:43,165
HA! PAYBACK FOR GOING
THROUGH MY ROOM AGAIN.
287
00:11:43,236 --> 00:11:47,536
OKAY. SLEEP ON THAT.
288
00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:50,307
GOOD NIGHT, TESSA.
289
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:51,677
GOOD NIGHT.
290
00:11:51,745 --> 00:11:54,275
(switch clicks)
291
00:11:57,317 --> 00:12:00,247
I THINK MALIK MADE A PASS AT ME
DURING GAME NIGHT.
292
00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:03,921
(indistinct conversations,
jazz music playing)
293
00:12:16,636 --> 00:12:19,436
WELL, THE BACON CERTAINLY
LOOKS CRISP THIS MORNING.
294
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:21,366
(chuckles)
295
00:12:21,441 --> 00:12:22,611
(crunches)
296
00:12:22,675 --> 00:12:26,345
MMM. IT IS. IT'S CRISP.
(chuckles)
297
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:27,713
KEEP US POSTED, FRED.
298
00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:29,921
I HEARD ABOUT YOU
AND SCOTT STRAUSS.
299
00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:31,553
I JUST WANNA SAY I APPROVE.
300
00:12:31,618 --> 00:12:34,018
MM, SHUT UP, RYAN.
HE HAS GREAT HAIR.
301
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,017
DAD.
IT DOESN'T HURT ME
TO SEE YOU WITH HIM.
302
00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:36,859
I'M GONNA GO GET
SOME GRAPEFRUIT.
303
00:12:36,924 --> 00:12:37,594
ANYONE WANT ANYTHING?
304
00:12:37,657 --> 00:12:38,957
I WANT YOU BACK.
305
00:12:39,026 --> 00:12:41,586
UH-HUH. I WILL GO GET
SOME MUFFINS FOR THE TABLE.
306
00:12:41,661 --> 00:12:54,471
**
307
00:12:54,541 --> 00:12:55,681
IT'S A LOT OF MUFFINS.
308
00:12:55,742 --> 00:12:56,882
WELL, I WORKED UP
A PRETTY BIG APPETITE
309
00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:58,384
AFTER ALL THE SEX
I'VE BEEN HAVING.
310
00:12:58,445 --> 00:12:59,905
YEAH, YEAH. HA. FUNNY.
311
00:12:59,980 --> 00:13:01,610
WHO KNOWS?
MAYBE I'M EATING FOR TWO.
312
00:13:01,681 --> 00:13:03,951
I'M THINKING XAVIER
IF IT'S A BOY... OR A GIRL.
313
00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:05,947
HEY, Y-YOU'RE JUST BEING
SILLY NOW. COME ON, TESSA.
314
00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:07,619
I WASN'T GOING THROUGH
YOUR ROOM.
315
00:13:07,687 --> 00:13:10,417
AND YET YOU WERE GOING
THROUGH MY ROOM.
316
00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:11,960
GOOD MORNING, GUYS.
317
00:13:12,025 --> 00:13:15,155
STEVEN'S SLEEPING WITH A HEIFER.
318
00:13:15,228 --> 00:13:17,028
(sighs)
I'M GONNA GO HIT THE GYM.
319
00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:18,527
I'LL COME WITH.
320
00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:24,473
I CAN'T GET THROUGH TO HER.
321
00:13:24,537 --> 00:13:26,337
SHE TREATS ME
LIKE I'M OUT OF TOUCH.
322
00:13:26,406 --> 00:13:27,536
I'M THE COOL DAD.
323
00:13:29,977 --> 00:13:31,377
WHAT?
I'M NOT THE COOL DAD?
324
00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:32,414
GEORGE...
325
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:35,079
THINK ABOUT HOW YOU WERE
BACK IN THE DAY.
326
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:38,488
YOU HAD SEX WITH A LOT
OF THE LADIES, ALL RIGHT?
327
00:13:38,551 --> 00:13:41,451
YOU WERE THE CHAMPION.
YOU WERE UNDEFEATED.
328
00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:44,091
HOW MANY WOMEN DID YOU
BRING DOWN TO THE MAT?
329
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,557
YOU'RE BEING IN APPROPRIATE.
330
00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:47,525
SEE, THE OLD GEORGE WOULD HAVE
HIGH-FIVED ME RIGHT THERE
331
00:13:47,594 --> 00:13:50,504
AND THEN HAD SEX
WITH HER.
332
00:13:50,563 --> 00:13:51,663
JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE A DAD
DOESN'T MEAN
333
00:13:51,731 --> 00:13:53,131
YOU CAN'T BE A DUDE.
334
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:56,570
BE A SINGLE DUDE.
DON'T BE A SINGLE DAD.
335
00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:58,606
IF NOT FOR YOU,
THEN FOR ME
336
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,111
AND THE REST
OF THE MARRIED GUYS
337
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:04,083
WHO CAN ONLY HAVE SEX
WITH OUR WIVES... IF AT ALL.
338
00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:06,814
(cell phone rings)
HEY, JILL.
339
00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:08,950
GEORGE NEEDS TO CHILL OUT.
340
00:14:09,016 --> 00:14:11,446
I DON'T EVEN KNOW
IF I WANNA DO IT WITH SCOTT.
341
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:15,218
HE WANTS TO KNOW HOW I FEEL
BEFORE I KNOW HOW I FEEL.
342
00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:16,918
HILL!
343
00:14:16,990 --> 00:14:19,430
YEAH, SURE, SCOTT IS CUTE
AND EVERYTHING,
344
00:14:19,492 --> 00:14:22,802
AND IT'S NOT LIKE
HE'S AN IDIOT...
345
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:25,202
BUT TRUTHFULLY,
HE'S KIND OF BORING.
346
00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:27,265
WAIT. DOES THAT SOUND MEAN?
I DON'T MEAN IT TO SOUND MEAN.
347
00:14:27,334 --> 00:14:28,304
POP IT LOW.
348
00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:32,038
AND ENOUGH ABOUT ZAMBIA.
WE GET IT.
349
00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:34,165
YOU'VE BEEN TO AFRICA.
YOU'RE A DO-GOODER.
350
00:14:34,241 --> 00:14:35,581
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE NOT GOOD AT?
351
00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:37,642
CATCH
AND PIVOT AT THE WAIST.
352
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,480
BASIC CONVERSATION.
353
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,976
THE TRUTH IS...
354
00:14:41,048 --> 00:14:43,848
WE DON'T HAVE ANYTHING
IN COMMON. (scoffs)
355
00:14:43,917 --> 00:14:45,217
THERE'S NO SPARK.
356
00:14:45,285 --> 00:14:47,585
SO WHAT AM I HOLDING ON TO?
357
00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:49,524
THANKS, DALLAS.
358
00:14:49,589 --> 00:14:50,889
THIS REALLY HELPED.
359
00:14:50,958 --> 00:14:52,228
(man) * SHE'S GOT
THAT KIND OF BOOTY *
360
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:57,325
IT SURE DID.
361
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:04,796
HELLO, AARON?
362
00:15:04,871 --> 00:15:07,671
(doorbell rings)
363
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,140
GEORGE.
HI, JOCELYN.
364
00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:12,379
YOU FORGOT YOUR GLASSES
AT THE CLUB THIS MORNING.
365
00:15:13,546 --> 00:15:15,546
(door closes)
THESE ARE LADIES' GLASSES.
366
00:15:15,615 --> 00:15:16,515
OH.
367
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,493
AND THEY'RE BIFOCALS.
368
00:15:18,551 --> 00:15:19,191
OH.
369
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:20,392
AND THEY'RE NOT MINE.
370
00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:21,923
THANKS FOR COMING
ALL THIS WAY, THOUGH.
371
00:15:21,989 --> 00:15:25,859
OH, OH, YEAH. I PASS BY
YOUR PLACE ALL THE TIME.
372
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:28,555
BUT YOU PROBABLY
DON'T NOTICE.
373
00:15:28,628 --> 00:15:30,428
SORRY. I NEED TO GET TESSA'S
CLOTHES OUT OF THE DRYER.
374
00:15:30,497 --> 00:15:32,297
THEY'RE MOSTLY COTTONS, AND IF I
LEAVE THEM IN THERE TOO LONG,
375
00:15:32,365 --> 00:15:34,325
THEN SHE IS A WRINKLED MESS.
376
00:15:35,668 --> 00:15:36,838
YOU'RE A REALLY GOOD DAD.
377
00:15:36,903 --> 00:15:38,473
YEAH.
378
00:15:38,538 --> 00:15:40,538
(Salt-N-Pepa's "Push It"
playing)
379
00:15:40,607 --> 00:15:43,577
BUT I'M ALSO A DUDE.
380
00:15:43,643 --> 00:15:44,613
OH.
381
00:15:44,677 --> 00:15:46,147
OH, I KNOW YOU ARE.
382
00:15:46,213 --> 00:15:48,483
* AH, PUSH IT
383
00:15:48,548 --> 00:15:51,078
(moaning)
384
00:15:57,824 --> 00:16:00,394
(moans and laughs)
385
00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,130
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
(panting)
386
00:16:02,195 --> 00:16:03,995
I DON'T WANNA GIVE YOU
THE WRONG IDEA.
387
00:16:04,064 --> 00:16:05,274
OH, GIVE IT TO ME.
388
00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:06,832
(clatter)
389
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:08,199
GIVE ME THE WRONG IDEA!
390
00:16:08,268 --> 00:16:10,468
* OOH, BABY, BABY
391
00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:14,067
GRAB IT. GRAB IT.
SLAP IT. TRICK IT.
392
00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:15,881
TRICK IT?
WHO'S A HUNGRY HIPPO?!
393
00:16:15,942 --> 00:16:17,142
I'M A HUNGRY HIPPO.
CONNECT 4.
394
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:18,950
CONNECT ALL 4.
YOU CONNECT ALL 4.
395
00:16:19,012 --> 00:16:20,082
SO YOU LIKE GAMES, HUH?
396
00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:21,277
I'M GONNA SLIDE DOWN
YOUR CHUTE,
397
00:16:21,348 --> 00:16:23,018
AND I'M GONNA CLIMB
UP YOUR LADDER.
398
00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:24,483
OH, YEAH.
YOU INTO MONOPOLY?
399
00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:25,851
I'M GOING TO JAIL.
400
00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:28,388
(shouts indistinctly)
I GOT YOUR HAIR!
401
00:16:28,455 --> 00:16:30,055
I GOT YOUR HAIR!
402
00:16:30,123 --> 00:16:31,263
(speaks indistinctly)
UH-HUH. UH-HUH.
403
00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:33,434
GO AHEAD. ALL OF IT, ALL OF IT.
YAHTZEE!
404
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:36,033
(thud)
(groans)
405
00:16:36,096 --> 00:16:38,796
THE WORKOUT WITH DALLAS
HAD GIVEN ME CLARITY.
406
00:16:38,865 --> 00:16:40,525
I KNEW WHAT I HAD TO DO.
407
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:43,870
I FELT STRONG,
AND SO DID MY ABS.
408
00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:46,066
(doorbell rings)
409
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:47,509
(Scott) ROUND BACK!
410
00:16:47,574 --> 00:16:49,244
(woman ululates)
411
00:16:49,309 --> 00:16:51,679
(tribal music playing)
412
00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:53,014
(bleats)
413
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,950
HI, TESSA.
THIS IS FOR YOUR FATHER.
414
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,785
(bleats)
OH. HOW DID YOU KNOW?
415
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:01,251
IT'S A TRADITIONAL
AFRICAN COURTSHIP OFFERING.
416
00:17:01,321 --> 00:17:03,961
(choir singing
in African dialect)
(goat bleats)
417
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,893
IT WASN'T EASY TO FIND
A GOAT.
418
00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:07,358
TOOK SOME DOING
ON MY PART, SO--
419
00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:10,527
I'M SURE MY DAD WILL
APPRECIATE THE GESTURE, REALLY.
420
00:17:10,597 --> 00:17:15,637
I-I'M JUST NOT SURE ABOUT
THE WHOLE... COURTSHIP THING.
421
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:18,372
I KNOW THIS SEEMS WEIRD,
AND THERE'S A GOAT INVOLVED,
422
00:17:18,438 --> 00:17:20,708
WHICH YOU'RE PROBABLY NOT
USED TO, BUT IN OUR CULTURE,
423
00:17:20,773 --> 00:17:23,583
SEX IS TRIVIALIZED,
AND I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE
424
00:17:23,643 --> 00:17:26,953
THAT OUR FIRST TIME
HAD... MEANING.
425
00:17:27,013 --> 00:17:28,453
YOU DESERVE
A THOUSAND GOATS.
426
00:17:28,515 --> 00:17:31,315
THANKS.
TESSA, DON'T THINK
I DIDN'T NOTICE.
427
00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:32,594
YOU'VE BEEN PULLING AWAY.
428
00:17:32,652 --> 00:17:34,322
YOU WANTED
A PHYSICAL RELATIONSHIP,
429
00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:35,517
BUT I WASN'T READY FOR IT.
430
00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:37,388
I DID, BUT THEN I GOT
TO KNOW YOU, AND--
431
00:17:37,457 --> 00:17:40,157
BUT I DIDN'T WANNA LOSE YOU,
SO I GOT READY.
432
00:17:40,227 --> 00:17:42,357
AND NOW I'M READY FOR IT.
433
00:17:42,429 --> 00:17:47,569
**
434
00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:48,674
LAY WITH ME.
435
00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:51,495
KEEP IN MIND MY PARENTS
WILL BE BACK BY 6:00.
436
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:52,611
(woman ululates)
437
00:17:52,672 --> 00:17:53,642
(bleats)
438
00:17:57,277 --> 00:17:59,347
I DECIDED
NOT TO LAY WITH SCOTT,
439
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:02,052
AND THE TWO OF US
WENT OUR SEPARATE WAYS.
440
00:18:02,115 --> 00:18:04,115
I GOT CUSTODY OF THE GOAT.
441
00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:11,658
OH! HEY! TESSA!
442
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:13,434
HEY, GOAT.
(bleats)
443
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:17,533
I WAS JUST, UH, RETURNING
A PAIR OF LADIES' BIFOCALS
444
00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:19,427
THAT DIDN'T BELONG
TO YOUR DAD,
445
00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:23,939
AND THEN I TRIPPED,
AND I BROKE MY... OHH.
446
00:18:24,003 --> 00:18:26,613
(sighs)
447
00:18:26,673 --> 00:18:29,913
YOU DON'T HAVE ANY WATER
ON YOU, DO YOU?
448
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:32,106
OKAY. COOL.
449
00:18:32,179 --> 00:18:33,379
OKAY.
450
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:34,406
(bleats)
451
00:18:38,185 --> 00:18:41,115
(ball bouncing)
452
00:18:41,188 --> 00:18:42,658
WHAT'S WITH THE GOAT?
453
00:18:42,722 --> 00:18:46,432
IT'S FOR YOU,
FROM MY EX-BOYFRIEND.
454
00:18:46,493 --> 00:18:47,433
EX?
455
00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:50,234
IT WASN'T WHAT YOU THOUGHT,
GEORGE.
456
00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:52,667
IT WASN'T WHAT I THOUGHT,
EITHER.
457
00:18:52,732 --> 00:18:54,102
OH.
458
00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:55,667
BUT FOR THE RECORD,
459
00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:58,135
UNLESS THAT WAS
YOUR ONE TRUE LOVE
460
00:18:58,205 --> 00:19:00,835
I SPOTTED
ON THE WAY OUT OF HERE,
461
00:19:00,907 --> 00:19:02,877
YOU ARE A BIG, FAT
HYPOCRITE.
462
00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:04,882
I STAND BY WHAT I SAID
EARLIER.
463
00:19:04,944 --> 00:19:06,714
YOU DO IT
FOR THE WRONG REASONS,
464
00:19:06,779 --> 00:19:08,009
YOU'LL REGRET IT.
465
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:10,180
THIS GOAT HAS BETTER
JUDGMENT THAN YOU.
(ball bouncing)
466
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:12,950
HEY, LAY OFF THE SNEAKERS,
GOAT.
467
00:19:13,019 --> 00:19:16,719
BUT SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T
WANNA BE TOLD WHAT TO DO,
468
00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:18,329
AND DALLAS...
469
00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:19,961
WAS ONE OF THEM.
470
00:19:20,026 --> 00:19:22,656
THIS IS MY HOUSE. TELL ME
WHAT TO DO WITH MY HOUSE...
471
00:19:22,729 --> 00:19:25,599
THIS IS HOW YOU LEAVE A MAN,
YAKULT.
472
00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:28,495
(Kelly Clarkson) * WHAT DOESN'T
KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER *
473
00:19:28,568 --> 00:19:30,568
* STAND A LITTLE TALLER
474
00:19:30,637 --> 00:19:33,837
* DOESN'T MEAN I'M LONELY
WHEN I'M ALONE *
475
00:19:33,906 --> 00:19:36,936
* WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU
MAKES A FIGHTER *
476
00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:38,809
* FOOTSTEPS EVEN LIGHTER
477
00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:42,248
* DOESN'T MEANT I'M OVER
'CAUSE YOU'RE GONE *
478
00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:46,085
* WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU
STRONGER *
479
00:19:46,152 --> 00:19:49,062
* STRONGER
480
00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:51,561
(music stops)
481
00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:53,134
MOMMY...
482
00:19:53,192 --> 00:19:55,702
ARE YOU AND DAD
GETTING A DIVORCE?
483
00:19:55,762 --> 00:19:56,962
(whimpers)
484
00:20:01,468 --> 00:20:03,338
TWO BIRTHDAY PARTIES,
TWO CHRISTMASES,
485
00:20:03,403 --> 00:20:04,873
AND TWO BEDROOMS TO DECORATE.
486
00:20:04,937 --> 00:20:06,437
I AM SO HAPPY, YOU GUYS.
487
00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:07,866
YOU ARE SO LUCKY.
I KNOW.
488
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:10,280
I WISH MY PARENTS
WERE GETTING A DIVORCE.
I KNOW.
489
00:20:10,343 --> 00:20:12,653
THERE IT WAS AGAIN--
THE LOOK OF ENVY.
490
00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:14,552
CHATSWIN'S GOTTA BE
THE ONLY PLACE ON EARTH
491
00:20:14,614 --> 00:20:17,824
WHERE DIVORCE WAS
SOMETHING YOU HIGH-FIVE OVER.
492
00:20:17,884 --> 00:20:19,554
GENTLEMEN,
WHEN YOU'RE READY TO ORDER,
493
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:22,049
JUST CALL ME IF YOU KNOW HOW
TO CALL A PERSON,
494
00:20:22,121 --> 00:20:25,021
WHICH IT DOESN'T SEEM
LIKE YOU DO.
495
00:20:25,091 --> 00:20:26,261
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M STARVING.
496
00:20:26,326 --> 00:20:27,556
I'M GONNA GO
WITH THE POWER PARFAIT.
497
00:20:27,627 --> 00:20:29,057
YEAH. I'LL JUST HAVE
EGGS OVER EASY.
498
00:20:29,128 --> 00:20:30,928
(laughs) YOU LIKE EVERYTHING
OVER EASY.
499
00:20:30,997 --> 00:20:32,367
JUST GO WITH THE SCRAMBLE.
500
00:20:32,432 --> 00:20:33,532
YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M JUST
GONNA HAVE SCRAMBLED EGGS,
501
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:34,870
UH, WITH A SIDE OF FRUIT.
502
00:20:34,934 --> 00:20:36,474
GOT A LITTLE SOMETHING EXTRA
ON THE SIDE, DO YOU?
503
00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:37,896
OKAY, THIS IS WHAT
I WAS AFRAID OF.
504
00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:41,370
I-I SAID I DIDN'T WANT TO
GIVE YOU THE WRONG IDEA.
505
00:20:41,441 --> 00:20:44,741
BUT AS I RECALL,
YOU GAVE ME THE WRONG IDEA.
506
00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:50,852
I'M KIDDING.
507
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:54,417
I'M TOTALLY KIDDING, GEORGE.
(laughs) YOU BIG GOOF.
508
00:20:54,487 --> 00:20:56,317
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH YOUR EGGS.
509
00:20:56,389 --> 00:20:58,859
(laughs)
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
510
00:20:58,925 --> 00:21:01,085
WEIGHING IN AT 180 POUNDS
IN THIS CORNER,
511
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,530
THE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION
OF LOVEMAKING--
512
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,195
"GORGEOUS" GEORGE ALTMAN!
513
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:05,333
(laughs) OKAY, OKAY.
514
00:21:05,398 --> 00:21:06,928
HE'S BACK!
HE'S NOT BACK.
515
00:21:06,999 --> 00:21:08,369
YES, HE IS.
516
00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:10,395
ALTHOUGH I WOULD NOT
EAT THOSE EGGS.
34700
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