All language subtitles for The Patrick Star Show s02e05 Movie Stars.eng
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1
00:00:07,108 --> 00:00:08,642
- Hi! I'm Patrick Star!
2
00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:11,745
And I live with my parents!
3
00:00:11,812 --> 00:00:12,613
Ow!
4
00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:14,315
This is my dad.
5
00:00:14,382 --> 00:00:16,584
[zany music]
6
00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:19,320
This is my mom.
[laughs]
7
00:00:19,387 --> 00:00:22,423
This is my sister. She's shy.
8
00:00:22,490 --> 00:00:24,792
This is my grandpa.
9
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,561
This is my room!
10
00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:28,562
And this...
11
00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:30,531
♪ ♪
12
00:00:30,598 --> 00:00:33,934
This is my show!
13
00:00:34,001 --> 00:00:35,869
♪ ♪
14
00:00:39,207 --> 00:00:41,609
- ♪ In our tent,
we are roughing it ♪
15
00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:43,544
- ♪ And our pillows,
we are fluffing it ♪
16
00:00:43,611 --> 00:00:44,812
both: Fluff, fluff!
17
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,881
- ♪ Our tummies,
we are stuffing it ♪
18
00:00:47,948 --> 00:00:50,384
both: ♪ 'Cause way out here,
we're roughing it ♪
19
00:00:50,451 --> 00:00:52,486
- [growling]
- Huh?
20
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,555
It sounds like
something's growling.
21
00:00:54,622 --> 00:00:56,890
- Must be my tummy.
[tense music]
22
00:00:56,957 --> 00:01:00,494
I'm still hungry no matter
how many weenies I eat.
23
00:01:02,496 --> 00:01:03,931
Can I have another one?
24
00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:06,967
- [growling]
25
00:01:07,034 --> 00:01:08,035
- Huh?
26
00:01:08,102 --> 00:01:10,571
- [sniffing, slurps]
27
00:01:10,638 --> 00:01:12,873
- A sea bear!
[screams]
28
00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:14,208
- [screams]
29
00:01:14,275 --> 00:01:16,777
- Here, shake my can
of lucky pennies at it.
30
00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:19,180
If that doesn't scare it off,
we can pay it to leave!
31
00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:22,383
- Shake, shake, shake,
shake, shake, shake.
32
00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:24,685
[gasps]
33
00:01:24,752 --> 00:01:28,856
Oh. [laughs]
It's just Bubble Bass.
34
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,558
- Ah... ugh.
35
00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:32,860
Fine smoked meats, gentlemen.
36
00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:35,529
Waiting in line makes me hungry.
37
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:36,830
- Oh, yeah!
38
00:01:36,897 --> 00:01:38,566
You're gonna need
a hearty breakfast
39
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,701
if you're going to see...
[inhales]
40
00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:43,804
The new Mermaid Man
& Barnacle Boy Pets Movie:
41
00:01:43,871 --> 00:01:46,174
"Mermaid Worm
& Barnacle Barnacle:
42
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:48,409
"Episode 6:
The Bubble Blowers Revenge,
43
00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,711
Part 2"!
[wheezes]
44
00:01:50,778 --> 00:01:53,447
- Good morning, patrons!
45
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,649
Are you ready to see the new
46
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:58,552
Mermaid Worm
& Barnacle Barnacle movie?
47
00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:01,155
[moviegoers cheering]
48
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:04,658
Well, too bad.
Screening's cancelled.
49
00:02:04,725 --> 00:02:06,927
All of our employees
took the day off
50
00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:09,730
so they could see the movie too.
51
00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:11,799
- [nervous laughter]
[moviegoers grumbling]
52
00:02:11,865 --> 00:02:14,368
- So unless I can find
two simpletons
53
00:02:14,435 --> 00:02:16,370
who want to work for free...
54
00:02:16,437 --> 00:02:18,239
- Sir, look no farther!
55
00:02:18,306 --> 00:02:19,707
- And no mother!
56
00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:20,908
- We'll work for free.
57
00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:23,344
- Buddy, let me handle this.
58
00:02:23,411 --> 00:02:25,913
Hey, we're not working for free.
59
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:28,849
Double that,
and you got yourself a deal.
60
00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:32,586
- Fine, you'll do.
You can all see the movie now.
61
00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:34,888
[all cheering]
62
00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:37,625
Except you two, of course.
63
00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:39,560
You two go tear the tickets
64
00:02:39,627 --> 00:02:43,063
and check for people
sneaking in outside food.
65
00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:46,300
[both gasp]
- Oh!
66
00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:47,301
- [laughs]
- [whimpers]
67
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:48,469
[both grunt]
68
00:02:48,536 --> 00:02:51,672
- Aye, aye!
- Sir, yes, sir!
69
00:02:51,739 --> 00:02:55,543
- [clears throat]
Tickets, pwease.
70
00:02:55,609 --> 00:02:58,145
Thank you. Enjoy the movie.
71
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:03,050
[coins clinking]
Have a nice viewing.
72
00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,118
- [ripping]
- [screams]
73
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:08,556
- [chuckles]
Enjoy the movie, you four.
74
00:03:08,622 --> 00:03:11,792
- No outside food
is getting past me.
75
00:03:11,859 --> 00:03:14,662
Halt, villain!
- Huh?
76
00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:17,298
- [sniffing]
77
00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:20,434
- Oh!
- [clicks tongue]
78
00:03:20,501 --> 00:03:24,037
Bad old lady.
- [grumbling]
79
00:03:24,104 --> 00:03:25,473
- Hold it!
80
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:27,074
You may be family,
81
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:30,278
but you won't get
perforation treatment from me.
82
00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:31,912
- [sniffing]
- Ooh.
83
00:03:31,979 --> 00:03:33,414
Oh!
84
00:03:33,481 --> 00:03:36,550
- Very disappointing.
- Oh.
85
00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:39,320
- [grunts, yelps] Hey!
86
00:03:39,387 --> 00:03:43,156
I learned that one from you!
87
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:46,727
- [chuckles] So, son, uh,
how's the new job going?
88
00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:48,896
[yelps]
- Aha!
89
00:03:48,962 --> 00:03:51,532
Just as I suspected.
90
00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:54,134
- B-But, son, we're blood!
91
00:03:54,201 --> 00:03:58,639
- Gravy is thicker
than blood, Dad!
92
00:03:58,706 --> 00:04:00,107
[dish shatters]
93
00:04:01,642 --> 00:04:03,210
Enjoy the show!
94
00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:07,080
- Pink guy and square boy,
go man the concessions stand.
95
00:04:07,147 --> 00:04:10,250
Customers need their official,
theater-approved snacks,
96
00:04:10,318 --> 00:04:11,552
pronto!
97
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:14,588
Hi-ya!
- [panting]
98
00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:17,024
- [grunts, groans]
99
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:20,928
- Hmm.
100
00:04:20,994 --> 00:04:25,333
One popcorn please,
uh, with a hint of butter.
101
00:04:25,399 --> 00:04:28,035
- Coming right up, sir!
102
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,203
[panting]
103
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:32,606
- That's good.
- [panting harder]
104
00:04:32,673 --> 00:04:34,475
- That's enough butter.
105
00:04:34,542 --> 00:04:36,444
No more, thanks.
106
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:37,978
Stop!
107
00:04:38,045 --> 00:04:42,049
- The butter will cover up
the taste of the sea rats.
108
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,283
Trust me.
109
00:04:43,351 --> 00:04:44,718
- Eww!
110
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,155
Could I get a napkin?
111
00:04:48,221 --> 00:04:50,358
- One napkin.
112
00:04:50,424 --> 00:04:54,227
[grunting]
113
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:57,331
Okay, forget it.
It's on the house.
114
00:04:57,398 --> 00:05:00,901
- Get those snacks moving!
It's almost showtime!
115
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:03,437
- Ah!
- [whimpers]
116
00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:07,107
- [laughs]
117
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:08,342
- Let's go!
118
00:05:08,409 --> 00:05:10,544
Those movie reels
won't spool themselves!
119
00:05:10,611 --> 00:05:13,947
- Yes, sir, yes, sir, yes, sir!
[whistle toots]
120
00:05:14,014 --> 00:05:15,916
I don't know how to do this.
121
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:19,186
- How hard can it be?
122
00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:20,187
Hmm.
123
00:05:20,253 --> 00:05:21,855
[chuckles]
Nothing to it.
124
00:05:21,922 --> 00:05:24,692
Just follow my lead.
125
00:05:24,758 --> 00:05:26,394
[grunting]
126
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:28,462
- [grunting]
127
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:33,401
[both whimpering]
128
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:34,868
[SpongeBob panting]
129
00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:37,304
[both screaming]
130
00:05:37,371 --> 00:05:39,707
- Okay, okay, okay, okay.
- Ah, ah, oh, oh.
131
00:05:39,773 --> 00:05:42,643
- [babbles]
- [screams]
132
00:05:42,710 --> 00:05:44,211
- "Curse of the Mummies"?
133
00:05:44,277 --> 00:05:46,380
[screams]
134
00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:48,281
- Oh, don't worry, honey.
135
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,317
Mummies aren't real.
136
00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:53,286
- Let's go find the boss.
He's gonna be so proud!
137
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:54,688
- [screams]
138
00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:56,724
- Why do parents lie?
139
00:05:56,790 --> 00:05:58,358
- Okay, you two!
140
00:05:58,426 --> 00:06:01,495
We've got a 3D short playing
before the main show,
141
00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:05,499
but I didn't pay for
a fancy 3D projector.
142
00:06:05,566 --> 00:06:09,236
So I need you two to make sure
the short "feels" 3D
143
00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:12,005
by throwing stuff
at the audience.
144
00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:15,743
- Hey, um,
some of these look pointy.
145
00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:17,110
[dramatic music playing]
146
00:06:17,177 --> 00:06:19,780
- Put on your 3D specs!
147
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:22,149
- Oh, no, a meteor shower!
148
00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:25,853
So many meteors!
[people screaming]
149
00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:27,521
♪ ♪
150
00:06:27,588 --> 00:06:29,056
[both grunting]
151
00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:30,524
[audience grunting]
- Hey!
152
00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:33,761
- Wow, it feels like
an actual concussion!
153
00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:35,195
[yelps]
154
00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:37,698
- Oh, these glasses
aren't working.
155
00:06:37,765 --> 00:06:40,400
[monsters roaring]
156
00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:43,771
all: Ooh.
157
00:06:43,837 --> 00:06:45,839
Ahh.
- [grunts]
158
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:48,141
[laughs]
That's better.
159
00:06:48,208 --> 00:06:51,111
[radical twangy music playing]
160
00:06:51,178 --> 00:06:52,480
[audience sputtering]
161
00:06:52,546 --> 00:06:54,381
- [laughs]
162
00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:58,151
- Good thing I just got
my pilot's license.
163
00:06:58,218 --> 00:06:59,419
[laughs]
164
00:06:59,487 --> 00:07:00,654
[screams]
165
00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:03,857
- These effects
are hardly believable.
166
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:06,293
[both yelp]
[motor revs]
167
00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:09,296
I stand corrected.
168
00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:11,231
Both: Whoa!
169
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:13,801
- This isn't a drive-in theater!
170
00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:16,269
You've got to set up
the next reel!
171
00:07:16,336 --> 00:07:18,271
All: Shh!
172
00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:19,473
Both: Sorry.
173
00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:21,241
- Oh, shush yourself!
174
00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:22,910
- [screams]
- No break!
175
00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:25,513
Projector, now!
176
00:07:25,579 --> 00:07:27,915
Both: [scream]
177
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:30,851
- And now,
our feature presentation.
178
00:07:30,918 --> 00:07:34,488
Both: Where's the next reel?
[frantic chatter]
179
00:07:34,555 --> 00:07:35,956
- Ooh, I think I found it.
180
00:07:36,023 --> 00:07:39,026
- Oh, hey,
this one looks good too.
181
00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:40,928
- How do we know
which one is which?
182
00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:45,065
- SpongeBob,
I say let the projector decide.
183
00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:47,200
- Quick, Barnacle Barnacle!
184
00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:49,570
We've got to save the
litterbox before it's too...
185
00:07:49,637 --> 00:07:51,572
- Why not enjoy a hot dog?
186
00:07:51,639 --> 00:07:54,407
Both: [muffled chatter]
187
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:57,645
[all cheering]
188
00:07:57,711 --> 00:07:59,479
[people screaming]
189
00:07:59,547 --> 00:08:01,348
- [slurps]
190
00:08:01,414 --> 00:08:03,817
- Don't you think
it's time for a popcorn?
191
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:06,987
[people screaming]
192
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:09,923
- Whoa!
[excited chatter]
193
00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:12,325
- [grunting]
194
00:08:12,392 --> 00:08:14,094
You'll never feast on our blood,
195
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,597
you vampire squid!
[grunts]
196
00:08:16,664 --> 00:08:21,334
- Refreshing soft drinks
at the concession stand now!
197
00:08:21,401 --> 00:08:24,638
- S-so c-c-cold.
- [slurping]
198
00:08:24,705 --> 00:08:26,940
all: Eww!
- That is not okay.
199
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:29,643
- This is the most blatant
product placement
200
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:31,378
I have ever seen.
201
00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:34,948
[scoffs] Good thing that stuff
doesn't work, right, Dad?
202
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:37,851
- [slurping
203
00:08:37,918 --> 00:08:39,452
both: Phew.
204
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,655
Time to watch the movie!
205
00:08:41,722 --> 00:08:42,790
[dramatic music]
206
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,324
[grunts]
207
00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:46,860
- And our favorite seats
are empty!
208
00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:49,529
[farty heroic music]
209
00:08:49,597 --> 00:08:52,633
[both grunting]
210
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:54,267
[both laugh]
211
00:08:54,334 --> 00:08:57,170
- Mermaid Worm Girl,
I think I love you.
212
00:08:57,237 --> 00:08:59,573
- Oh, yeah? Prove it.
213
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:01,041
Muah, muah!
214
00:09:01,108 --> 00:09:03,276
Muah, muah, muah!
- Oh.
215
00:09:03,343 --> 00:09:04,845
- Why, that's just a mask!
216
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:06,213
All: [gasps]
217
00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:08,582
- You're not really
Mermaid Worm Girl.
218
00:09:08,649 --> 00:09:10,383
- Oh?
- What?
219
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:13,587
Oh, man, we're missing
major plot twists!
220
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:16,289
- This guy should take
his stupid hat off!
221
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:18,826
- How's this for a plot twist?
[dramatic music]
222
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,961
Get back to work!
223
00:09:21,028 --> 00:09:23,296
- [stammering]
But we did everything!
224
00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:28,335
- We've been good ushers
and we wanna watch the movie!
225
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,704
- Ushers should be ushering.
226
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:33,006
- Whoa!
- [yelps]
227
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:36,009
[growls]
228
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,811
- Oh!
Both: Excuse us.
229
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:38,879
Oh!
230
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:42,616
[zany music]
231
00:09:42,683 --> 00:09:44,451
[whimpering]
232
00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:46,954
- Running away from
your responsibilities?
233
00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:51,058
You two should be gluing the
half-eaten food back together!
234
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,093
Both: [whimpering]
235
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:54,527
- Halt, evil doer,
236
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:57,397
or face the wrath
of Mermaid Worm.
237
00:09:57,464 --> 00:10:00,367
The utter stupidity
of these pathetic,
238
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:03,937
small-minded simpletons
is not for you to exploit.
239
00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:06,506
Both: [gasp]
We're pathetic!
240
00:10:06,573 --> 00:10:09,843
- Hey!
You keep out of this, movie!
241
00:10:09,910 --> 00:10:11,544
And you two,
242
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:14,982
what do you think
I'm not paying you for?
243
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:17,651
[both grunt]
244
00:10:17,718 --> 00:10:19,119
[audience gasps]
245
00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:20,520
- [groans]
246
00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:23,056
where did
those two hooligans go?
247
00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:24,792
- Ahem.
- Huh?
248
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:26,559
- I said, ahem!
249
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:30,998
Mermaid Worm
and Barnacle Barnacle!
250
00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,666
I've never seen you before.
251
00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:33,934
- [chatters]
252
00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:36,036
- Yes, Barnacle Barnacle,
that makes sense.
253
00:10:36,103 --> 00:10:38,071
He must be a bad guy!
254
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,272
- What?
255
00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:42,542
Why is the boss
always the bad guy?
256
00:10:42,609 --> 00:10:43,944
[screams]
257
00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:46,914
[dramatic music]
258
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,115
♪ ♪
259
00:10:48,181 --> 00:10:49,850
- Got any candy bars, Mom?
260
00:10:49,917 --> 00:10:52,619
- Ooh, check my armpits.
261
00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:54,654
- Does anyone have
a plate of spaghetti?
262
00:10:54,722 --> 00:10:56,556
Ooh. Mmm.
263
00:10:56,623 --> 00:11:00,227
- Hey! No outside food
in the theater!
264
00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:01,929
[yelping]
265
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,330
[screams]
266
00:11:05,833 --> 00:11:07,667
[grunts]
267
00:11:07,735 --> 00:11:09,837
- The end!
268
00:11:09,903 --> 00:11:11,404
- That was pretty good.
269
00:11:11,471 --> 00:11:13,640
What did you think, Bubble Bass?
270
00:11:13,707 --> 00:11:16,176
[rats squeaking]
271
00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:18,478
- The ending felt random.
272
00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:26,820
[bright music]
273
00:11:26,887 --> 00:11:28,021
[music winds down]
274
00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:29,289
- [grunts]
275
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:31,825
- All right,
that's a wrap on the intro!
276
00:11:33,994 --> 00:11:35,562
- [grunts]
277
00:11:35,628 --> 00:11:37,397
Science.
278
00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:40,500
It's all about
matter and energy.
279
00:11:40,567 --> 00:11:43,403
So if something
is the matter with you,
280
00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:47,074
fix your energy with crystals!
281
00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:49,777
Hey, you're just a rock.
282
00:11:49,843 --> 00:11:51,678
- I'm doing my best.
283
00:11:51,745 --> 00:11:55,983
- Well, do it somewhere else.
[grunts]
284
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:59,052
- A six-leaf sea clover?
285
00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:01,488
Talk about a scientific anomaly.
286
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:02,823
Ow!
287
00:12:02,890 --> 00:12:04,157
[whimpers, yelps]
288
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,425
Doggone!
289
00:12:05,492 --> 00:12:07,828
My pseudoscience detector
is going nuts.
290
00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:09,162
[arm whirs, dings]
291
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:10,497
[gasps]
292
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:12,465
And it's coming from
the Star family house!
293
00:12:12,532 --> 00:12:14,802
- Patrick's selling crystals
again.
294
00:12:14,868 --> 00:12:18,071
- I should've figured.
He's as dense as a rock.
295
00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:22,175
- Hey. I resemble that remark.
296
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:26,880
- We now return to one of my
favorite scientifical topics:
297
00:12:26,947 --> 00:12:28,949
astronomy!
298
00:12:29,016 --> 00:12:30,683
If you've ever thought,
299
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:34,421
"coming up with my own
personality is too hard,"
300
00:12:34,487 --> 00:12:36,289
you're gonna love this!
301
00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:41,228
This sea horsey man
is called "Saggy Terry."
302
00:12:41,294 --> 00:12:44,564
If you were born on a Tuesday
in Jan-tember,
303
00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:48,701
Saggy Terry says
you'll be very unlucky
304
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:54,141
unless you order Patrick Star's
Scientific Guide to Astronomy.
305
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:57,377
Order now and we'll throw in
this free healing crystal!
306
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:58,745
- Hot diggity!
307
00:12:58,812 --> 00:13:01,314
I can cancel
my doctor's appointment!
308
00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:03,516
- Hush your pie hole, Patrick!
309
00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:05,685
That's not astronomy.
310
00:13:05,752 --> 00:13:07,154
- Huh?
311
00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:09,189
- It's astrology.
312
00:13:09,256 --> 00:13:11,624
And astrology ain't scientific.
313
00:13:11,691 --> 00:13:14,427
You can't go spouting off
any old cockamamie thing
314
00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:16,096
and call it science.
315
00:13:16,163 --> 00:13:18,531
- Well, but I have a lab coat.
316
00:13:18,598 --> 00:13:20,934
- No, no.
No pseudoscience.
317
00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:22,135
- [hisses]
318
00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:24,437
- All right, kids, Sandy's here,
319
00:13:24,504 --> 00:13:28,508
so get ready for some
genuine real science!
320
00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,445
- Uh...
321
00:13:32,512 --> 00:13:36,049
- Say, Patrick, have you ever
wondered how a radio works?
322
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:38,218
- Ooh, ooh, ooh! No.
323
00:13:38,285 --> 00:13:39,652
- Okay.
324
00:13:39,719 --> 00:13:42,289
Well, wouldn't it be neat
if we could look inside
325
00:13:42,355 --> 00:13:44,124
and see how it works?
326
00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:45,492
- Yeah!
327
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:46,693
[grunts]
328
00:13:46,759 --> 00:13:49,829
- Ah! You pulverized my radio!
329
00:13:49,897 --> 00:13:54,134
- Where are all the elves
that play the instruments?
330
00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:55,835
[screams]
331
00:13:55,903 --> 00:13:57,604
- No pseudoscience! No!
332
00:13:59,639 --> 00:14:00,908
- Uh...
333
00:14:00,974 --> 00:14:02,442
- Take two.
334
00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:03,877
All right, Patrick,
335
00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:08,015
you ready to see something
you've never seen before?
336
00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:10,350
- Hey, I have seen this before.
337
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:13,220
The TV is showing my lunch.
338
00:14:13,286 --> 00:14:15,622
- Oh, Patrick, that's not a TV.
339
00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:18,325
It's an X-ray of your insides.
340
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:22,996
- [gasps]
That's inside me right now?
341
00:14:23,063 --> 00:14:24,264
[laughs]
342
00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:26,433
[grunting]
343
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:29,869
- What in tarnation
is he doing in there?
344
00:14:29,937 --> 00:14:32,772
- Pizza!
345
00:14:32,839 --> 00:14:33,907
Ah.
346
00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:37,044
Ooh, more pizza!
347
00:14:37,110 --> 00:14:39,112
Ah... ooh!
348
00:14:39,179 --> 00:14:40,480
- What the...
349
00:14:40,547 --> 00:14:42,615
kids, I don't know
how he's doing this,
350
00:14:42,682 --> 00:14:46,920
but that is absolutely not how
the digestive system works.
351
00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:47,988
All right, Patrick,
352
00:14:48,055 --> 00:14:50,924
time for a real easy experiment:
353
00:14:50,991 --> 00:14:53,026
the volcano!
354
00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:54,494
And we're fixin'
to make it erupt
355
00:14:54,561 --> 00:14:56,329
with a chemical reaction
356
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:59,099
derived from baking soda
and vinegar.
357
00:14:59,166 --> 00:15:02,402
- So that's how volcanoes work.
358
00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:05,072
- [chuckles]
It's not a real volcano.
359
00:15:05,138 --> 00:15:06,306
It's a model.
360
00:15:06,373 --> 00:15:09,276
- Nuh-uh. This is a model.
361
00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:11,044
- Pose.
[camera shutter clicks]
362
00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:12,479
- Here, you need to add
363
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:15,448
precisely one teaspoon
of baking soda.
364
00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:19,252
- One tea-spork of baking dust.
- [whimpers]
365
00:15:19,319 --> 00:15:21,388
- Get ready to learn!
366
00:15:21,454 --> 00:15:23,356
[dramatic music]
367
00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:24,791
- [grunts] Oww.
368
00:15:26,526 --> 00:15:29,462
- And now for our next
real science topic...
369
00:15:29,529 --> 00:15:31,931
- Status, uh, eel...
370
00:15:31,999 --> 00:15:34,101
- Static electricity.
371
00:15:34,167 --> 00:15:36,203
GrandPat Star will demonstrate
372
00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:39,839
how to build up a static charge
by shuffling his feet.
373
00:15:39,906 --> 00:15:42,842
- [grunting]
- Just keep at it
374
00:15:42,909 --> 00:15:45,112
and we'll check back in on you
in a little bit.
375
00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:48,248
- [laughs] I'll give it
the ol' sawtucket shuffle!
376
00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:50,050
- For our next real experiment,
377
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:52,986
we'll demonstrate
that plants can hear.
378
00:15:53,053 --> 00:15:54,521
- Wait, what?
379
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:57,957
- We played this specimen
only classical music,
380
00:15:58,025 --> 00:16:00,593
and look how
it has affected its growth.
381
00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:04,197
He's even devising a theorem
for Neptune's Paradox.
382
00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:07,067
[music winds down]
383
00:16:07,134 --> 00:16:09,702
- Pardon me.
384
00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:11,238
[rock music playing]
385
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,806
- We played this one punk rock.
386
00:16:13,873 --> 00:16:16,576
Whoo! Now it refuses
to clean its room
387
00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:21,114
and keeps talking about
"fighting the man."
388
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:23,583
And this is our control group.
389
00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:25,018
We don't play it music at all.
390
00:16:25,085 --> 00:16:27,520
- Oh, well, here's something
that's not music.
391
00:16:27,587 --> 00:16:29,522
Squidward!
- [grunts, groans]
392
00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:31,058
- Oh, Patrick, I don't know.
393
00:16:31,124 --> 00:16:32,792
- Oh, it's no trouble.
394
00:16:32,859 --> 00:16:35,462
I love playing for an audience
395
00:16:35,528 --> 00:16:37,497
that can't walk away.
- [whimpers]
396
00:16:37,564 --> 00:16:40,467
[off-tune clarinet music]
397
00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:42,935
♪ ♪
398
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:46,106
- Creepin' kudzu,
look at it grow!
399
00:16:46,173 --> 00:16:47,974
I guess the plant likes it.
400
00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:50,343
- [growls, blubbers]
401
00:16:50,410 --> 00:16:52,112
- Or not.
[gasps]
402
00:16:52,179 --> 00:16:54,781
- [screams]
403
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:58,685
- Ooh, hey, look, this crystal
ball said that would happen.
404
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:01,421
Space.
405
00:17:01,488 --> 00:17:04,757
In the vast biggy-ness
of our universe
406
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:09,529
lie billions
and billions of dots.
407
00:17:09,596 --> 00:17:11,131
Some dots are small.
408
00:17:11,198 --> 00:17:12,365
- [shrieks]
409
00:17:12,432 --> 00:17:13,766
- Some dots are loud.
410
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:17,870
And this dot has its own donut.
411
00:17:21,408 --> 00:17:24,544
- Captain, there's an anomaly
with the planet Saturn.
412
00:17:24,611 --> 00:17:27,480
- Put it on display, Pat-Tron.
413
00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:28,848
Oh, no.
414
00:17:28,915 --> 00:17:32,152
It's a Celestial Patrick,
Devourer of Worlds.
415
00:17:32,219 --> 00:17:33,486
Battle stations, Pat-Tron!
416
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,788
That gastric giant
must be stopped.
417
00:17:35,855 --> 00:17:38,458
Charge capacitors.
Raise shields.
418
00:17:38,525 --> 00:17:40,927
Engage ion thrusters.
- Ooh, a sprinkle.
419
00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:42,462
- Battle down the hyperdrive.
- Ahh.
420
00:17:42,529 --> 00:17:44,697
[metal creaking]
421
00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:49,169
- This ain't science.
It's barely science fiction.
422
00:17:49,236 --> 00:17:51,037
[dramatic music]
423
00:17:51,104 --> 00:17:52,972
[rocket whooshing]
424
00:17:53,039 --> 00:17:55,408
♪ ♪
425
00:17:55,475 --> 00:17:56,643
Patrick!
426
00:17:56,709 --> 00:17:59,646
- Aww, are you gonna
spray me again?
427
00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:03,216
- I want to,
but there's no water in space.
428
00:18:03,283 --> 00:18:05,318
[arm whirs]
429
00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:07,387
- No water? Uh-oh.
430
00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:08,855
[grunts]
431
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,690
[ding]
432
00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:14,627
And that is how a star is made.
433
00:18:14,694 --> 00:18:19,098
Isn't astrology fascinating?
434
00:18:19,166 --> 00:18:22,135
Aww, man.
I'm doing it again, aren't I?
435
00:18:22,202 --> 00:18:23,936
- Mm-hmm.
436
00:18:24,003 --> 00:18:25,472
- [whimpers]
- What the?
437
00:18:25,538 --> 00:18:27,840
What in tarnation is going on?
438
00:18:27,907 --> 00:18:30,777
- Mm-hmm.
Work it, work it, work it.
439
00:18:30,843 --> 00:18:33,980
- Oh, no!
We forgot about GrandPat!
440
00:18:34,046 --> 00:18:37,083
He done got static supercharged.
441
00:18:37,150 --> 00:18:39,919
- [cackling]
442
00:18:39,986 --> 00:18:41,154
[grunts]
443
00:18:41,221 --> 00:18:44,157
[laughing]
444
00:18:45,158 --> 00:18:48,561
Cower before me, Bikini Bottom!
445
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:51,531
[laughs]
446
00:18:51,598 --> 00:18:56,102
Witness my unlimited power!
[grunts]
447
00:18:56,169 --> 00:18:59,306
- We gotta fight electricity
with electricity.
448
00:18:59,372 --> 00:19:02,041
[grunting]
449
00:19:02,108 --> 00:19:03,276
♪ ♪
450
00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:05,478
[electricity whirring]
451
00:19:05,545 --> 00:19:07,714
- [yelps]
- Did it work?
452
00:19:07,780 --> 00:19:10,750
♪ ♪
453
00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:14,254
[energy whirring]
454
00:19:14,321 --> 00:19:16,055
[heroic music]
455
00:19:16,122 --> 00:19:19,192
- Go get 'em, Patrick.
[grunts]
456
00:19:19,259 --> 00:19:22,529
[dramatic music]
457
00:19:22,595 --> 00:19:25,665
- That will be enough, GrandPat.
458
00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:27,900
- Eh! Go suck an egg!
459
00:19:27,967 --> 00:19:29,369
- I see.
460
00:19:29,436 --> 00:19:33,540
Well, I guess I'll solve this
through the process of...
461
00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:36,776
elimination!
462
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,378
- [whimpers] Oh!
463
00:19:38,445 --> 00:19:42,014
[grunting]
464
00:19:42,081 --> 00:19:45,051
- Feel the weight
of the evidence.
465
00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:49,356
- [cackling]
466
00:19:51,824 --> 00:19:53,793
- Missed me. Huh?
467
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:55,027
- Oh.
[chuckles]
468
00:19:55,094 --> 00:19:57,397
Pardon me.
I'll just be going.
469
00:19:57,464 --> 00:19:58,798
[screams]
470
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:02,201
- Surprise!
[laughs]
471
00:20:04,404 --> 00:20:05,438
- [farts]
472
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:09,942
♪ ♪
473
00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:11,711
- [laughs] My leg!
474
00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:14,013
My leg!
475
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:17,384
- Oh, rats.
I forgot to charge my phone.
476
00:20:17,450 --> 00:20:19,118
[babbles]
477
00:20:19,185 --> 00:20:21,153
Go for Slappy.
478
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,222
- [grunting]
479
00:20:23,290 --> 00:20:24,991
- Uh-oh.
480
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:26,993
[screams]
481
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:29,629
- Patrick! Are y'all okay?
482
00:20:29,696 --> 00:20:33,600
- Just taking
a little super power nap.
483
00:20:33,666 --> 00:20:36,269
- [laughs]
484
00:20:36,336 --> 00:20:37,670
[bus horn honks]
485
00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:40,307
♪ ♪
486
00:20:40,373 --> 00:20:44,511
Hey, Patrick,
wanna learn about gravity?
487
00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:46,145
[cackles]
488
00:20:46,212 --> 00:20:48,781
- Talk about
a failed experiment.
489
00:20:48,848 --> 00:20:50,950
- Ooh, this day is turning out
490
00:20:51,017 --> 00:20:53,486
just like
my horoscope predicted.
491
00:20:53,553 --> 00:20:54,821
- Horoscope?
492
00:20:54,887 --> 00:20:57,123
But that's...
493
00:20:57,189 --> 00:20:59,292
[grunts]
494
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,329
- [laughs] Huh?
495
00:21:02,395 --> 00:21:03,596
- Yes, Patrick.
496
00:21:03,663 --> 00:21:06,299
It's pseudoscience.
497
00:21:06,366 --> 00:21:08,635
- Strudel science.
498
00:21:08,701 --> 00:21:10,136
- Eh, close enough.
499
00:21:10,202 --> 00:21:11,771
- [babbling]
500
00:21:11,838 --> 00:21:13,540
[electricity crackling]
501
00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:16,343
[screams]
502
00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:21,881
- Wow, Sandy, we did it!
503
00:21:21,948 --> 00:21:26,185
We used science to stop him
and save the day.
504
00:21:26,252 --> 00:21:27,787
[metal thunks]
505
00:21:27,854 --> 00:21:30,056
- Ha! You didn't stop me!
506
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,591
Nothing can stop...
[crystal clanks]
507
00:21:31,658 --> 00:21:34,060
[babbles]
508
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:38,765
- Gee, I reckon pseudoscience
is good for something after all.
509
00:21:38,831 --> 00:21:41,233
So if you've released
a super villain
510
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:43,636
due to your own
scientific negligence,
511
00:21:43,703 --> 00:21:47,139
try out our latest assortment
of gems and essential oils!
512
00:21:47,206 --> 00:21:50,443
They're great for bonkin',
bashin', and smashin.
513
00:21:50,510 --> 00:21:54,381
When science attacks,
they're sure to be a knockout!
514
00:21:54,447 --> 00:21:57,584
- Call now and we'll throw in
other heavy objects!
515
00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:59,051
[phone rings]
- Yes, hello?
516
00:21:59,118 --> 00:22:01,421
I'll take your heaviest object.
517
00:22:01,488 --> 00:22:03,923
[crystal tinkles]
518
00:22:03,973 --> 00:22:08,523
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