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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:12,960 - Oh, slow dance, come on. - No! 2 00:00:13,040 --> 00:00:14,840 - Yes. - I'm not dancing to Lionel Richie. 3 00:00:14,920 --> 00:00:16,080 Why not? 4 00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:18,960 Because... it's, like, it's a man rule. 5 00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:21,320 Boring rule! 6 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:22,880 May I have the honor? 7 00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:25,320 - There you go. - Oh, yes! Thank you, Ray. 8 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:31,640 ♪ To the end of our rainbow ♪ 9 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:35,960 ♪ There's something I must ♪ 10 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:40,720 ♪ Say out loud ♪ 11 00:00:44,160 --> 00:00:45,680 ♪ You're once ♪ 12 00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:48,200 ♪ Twice ♪ 13 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:54,360 ♪ Three times a lady ♪ 14 00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:59,760 ♪ And I love you ♪ 15 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:23,200 It's looking like, touch wood... 16 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:26,760 ...um... that me and Jill are going to get back together. 17 00:01:27,240 --> 00:01:28,920 So, I think it was just a wobble. 18 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,160 It's such a weight off my mind. I feel so... 19 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:33,440 I just feel so happy. 20 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:36,120 Good for you! 21 00:01:37,320 --> 00:01:38,320 Thanks. 22 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:39,840 Er... 23 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:43,520 - Are you OK? - No, I'm not OK, actually. 24 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:45,920 I'm fed up. 25 00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:48,800 Sick of this shit. 26 00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:54,800 Hearing people whinging all day long, it rubs off on me, brings me down. 27 00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:58,960 Sometimes I just wanna say, 28 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:01,320 "Shut the fuck up, you whiny bitch." 29 00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:04,160 I'm gonna knock it on the head soon. 30 00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:07,520 Do a podcast with Ratty and the Nonce, people'd pay for that. 31 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,400 It's better than this fucking bollocks. 32 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,560 Um, what will the podcast be about? 33 00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:16,400 Advice for men. 34 00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:18,360 - Right. - How to fucking grow a pair. 35 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:23,360 Pushing back against all this namby-pamby shit. 36 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:25,480 Let me tell you something, Matt. 37 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:26,920 Alpha males... 38 00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:29,040 save nations. 39 00:02:30,600 --> 00:02:31,600 Fact. 40 00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:33,360 Yeah... 41 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:36,520 What would we do now if Hitler decided to invade us? 42 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:39,200 Give him a little kiss and cuddle? 43 00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:41,640 Stroke his hair? 44 00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:43,920 - No, I don't... - No. 45 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:45,760 Bend him over... 46 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:49,000 and fuck him up his little Nazi arse, 47 00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:53,000 rape him up the shitbox till he fucking vomits, 48 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:56,440 cut off his bollocks and shove them in his fucking Nazi mouth, 49 00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,480 and send him back to sausage land. 50 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:00,880 Great. Um... thanks for all your help. 51 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:05,240 Um... have you got any therapist friends you could talk to? 52 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:08,240 About what? 53 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:10,920 About... wanting to rape Hitler. 54 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:14,160 Anybody who doesn't want to rape Hitler is a fucking bender. 55 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:15,960 Yeah, I'm gonna go. 56 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:17,840 Um... 57 00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:21,680 Um... 58 00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:26,160 I'll see you, uh, around, then. 59 00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:28,600 Bye. 60 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:34,080 Are you, um... 61 00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:37,200 are you gonna mention my accident in the review? 62 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:38,840 Um... 63 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:41,400 - He means him shitting himself on stage. - Mm. 64 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:43,880 I... I guessed that's what he meant, Brian. 65 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:45,760 'Cause, please... 66 00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:47,240 don't. 67 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:49,600 'Cause I'm... I'm already a laughing stock. 68 00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:52,400 - You're not a laughing stock. - I am, I'm a laughing stock. 69 00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:55,360 I won't mention it. I'll say, "A good time was had by all." 70 00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:56,600 OK. 71 00:03:57,360 --> 00:03:59,800 Are you gonna say that I died on my arse, or...? 72 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:03,920 'Cause I did. Classic. Your bottle goes, you don't know where you're going, 73 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:07,280 don't know what you're doing, all over the place. I was in a haze. 74 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,080 I think I got a little bit of stage fright. 75 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:11,840 I forgot a lot of my best jokes. 76 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:15,560 - What jokes did you forget? - Ooh! Er... 77 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:19,840 What do you get if you cross my ex-wife with Buzz Aldrin? 78 00:04:20,880 --> 00:04:22,840 You get an astronaut who fucks gypsies. 79 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,400 - You like that one? - Yeah, that was... good. 80 00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:30,880 Um... I'm just going to keep writing. 81 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:31,960 Um... 82 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,200 - You all right? - Dad died last night. 83 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:37,000 Oh, mate. 84 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:42,200 Let everyone know. Tell them not to talk to me about it, 'cause... 85 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:43,960 sympathy makes me worse. 86 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:48,400 Yeah. Um... Is there anything I can do? Do you need any help with the funeral? 87 00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:51,880 I don't think there's... much to be done, to be honest. 88 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:53,080 He only had me. 89 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:54,520 No will, 90 00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:56,080 'cause he had fuck-all. 91 00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:59,840 No one to argue with. That's why... funerals are usually a nightmare. 92 00:04:59,920 --> 00:05:02,520 Ten members of the family coming up with shit ideas. 93 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,040 "It's what he would've wanted." 94 00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:07,136 Yeah, it doesn't matter what he wants, does it? He's dead. 95 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:09,440 You mean it's what you want, so you can get involved 96 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:12,680 and take a bit of credit. Well, none of that. I'm in charge. 97 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:14,880 I pick a day convenient for me. 98 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:17,640 I might not even turn up. I've paid. 99 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:19,240 He's dead. 100 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:21,520 Nice eulogy. 101 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:24,440 He was my dad. 102 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:26,680 I'll have a drink on him. 103 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:28,840 He was a lovely man, your dad. 104 00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:32,880 And you're right, he didn't have much, but he was always happy. 105 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:34,200 He had Mum. 106 00:05:34,280 --> 00:05:36,200 That was... That was the secret. 107 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:38,480 I didn't understand it growing up. 108 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:41,680 We had no money, and yet he was always so positive. 109 00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:44,840 I didn't understand it till I met Lisa, but... 110 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:47,240 ...it is everything. 111 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,800 Being in love, I mean. 112 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:51,240 You just don't need anything else. 113 00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,840 You realize that even more when they're not around. 114 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:56,600 - No hugging. - Yeah. 115 00:05:56,680 --> 00:05:57,960 - Yeah. - Of course. 116 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:01,400 I'll send a memo: "No hugging." 117 00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:03,200 All right. 118 00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:05,200 - I'm gonna go to the nursing home. - Yeah. 119 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:13,040 What did you think of the show, mate? 120 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:16,360 Yeah. Yeah, it was brilliant. 121 00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:18,240 Really funny. 122 00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:21,880 You were great, too, James. Well done. 123 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,480 OK, everyone, listen up. Um... 124 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,000 Tony's dad died last night, 125 00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:36,920 but he doesn't want to talk about it with anyone. 126 00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,200 He just wants to... get on with it. 127 00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:42,280 He doesn't cope with sympathy too well. 128 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:44,440 Uh... So, no hugging... 129 00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:46,440 or anything. Um... 130 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:48,320 OK. 131 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:50,720 Yeah, as you were. Carry on. 132 00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:10,080 That's all his personal stuff. 133 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:12,720 His... clothes we normally take to the charity shop. 134 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,000 Yeah, sure. 135 00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:15,520 Um... 136 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:19,320 Guess I won't be... popping in 'ere every day. 137 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:22,040 Well, no. Right. 138 00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:23,560 - No, I mean... - I know. 139 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:25,880 I'd like to... see you. 140 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:28,640 But, uh... I know we've got a lot on and... 141 00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:32,960 um... I know you're in a hurry for summat to happen, 142 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:34,280 - but... - I'm not in a hurry! 143 00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:36,000 No, I mean... you know. 144 00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:39,040 Anyway, you've got Simon now. 145 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:41,440 I haven't got Simon. 146 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:44,120 I just... I've got a bit of company, that's all. 147 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:45,960 Haven't I? 148 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:51,400 - You know how I feel about you. - I know. 149 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:53,000 - But you're not interested. - I am, 150 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:55,240 but I don't know why we can't just carry on like this, 151 00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:58,040 you know? We see each other all the time. It's great. 152 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,240 We like each other. Why do you have to call it summat? 153 00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:02,880 Let's just carry on, you know, and nothing changes. 154 00:08:03,520 --> 00:08:04,520 Groundhog Day. 155 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,840 Maybe I don't want Groundhog Day. 156 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:09,800 I know. 157 00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:13,280 OK. 158 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:15,960 Thank you. Um... 159 00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:19,520 - See you later. - Mm-hmm. 160 00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:42,600 Only me! 161 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:44,240 Hello, mate. 162 00:08:45,280 --> 00:08:47,280 - All right? - All right? 163 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,360 Yeah. 164 00:08:52,280 --> 00:08:54,400 - Sorry to hear about your dad. - Cheers. 165 00:08:58,040 --> 00:08:59,040 What are these? 166 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:02,320 Sleeping pills. 167 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:05,000 Why? 168 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:08,360 To help me sleep. 169 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:10,960 Really? 170 00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:12,440 Yeah, I just... 171 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:15,960 Why are they down here? 172 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:18,240 So I don't have to get up to kill myself. 173 00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:20,400 Tony, seriously... 174 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:23,920 What? There... Look, there was a time, but, you know... 175 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:27,160 I mean, you could take 'em away, but if I really wanted to do summat, 176 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:28,600 there's knives in the kitchen, 177 00:09:28,680 --> 00:09:31,120 I could fucking hang myself in a wardrobe with a belt. 178 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,120 - Why you still thinking like that? - I'm not, particularly. 179 00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:36,720 Not all the time. 180 00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:39,440 Have you just come round to nag me? 181 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,000 No, I've come... 182 00:09:41,720 --> 00:09:43,560 I've come round to see if you're OK. 183 00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:47,280 How's it going with the postman? 184 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:48,960 Please tell me you're OK. 185 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:50,440 I'm OK. 186 00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:54,400 How's it going with the postman? 187 00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:57,680 Yeah, I mean... he's a funny man. 188 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:00,360 Nice description. 189 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:04,840 I'm just worried, you know, my past is going to catch up with me 190 00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:06,600 and he's not gonna be able to cope with it. 191 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:09,800 Don't worry about your past. Worry about your future. 192 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:12,960 I'm more worried about your future. 193 00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:17,440 You remind me of Lisa sometimes. 194 00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:21,320 Everyone else had to be OK before she could be OK. 195 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:25,360 At night, in bed, 196 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:27,080 she'd say, 197 00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:28,440 "Good night." 198 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:32,600 And sometimes, I wouldn't answer her, to wind her up. 199 00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:36,440 And she'd go, "Say it! You gotta say it, or I can't sleep." 200 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:38,840 And I'd go, "Why? It's stupid." She'd go, "Say it!" 201 00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:40,640 And I had to say it last as well. 202 00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:43,320 And, uh, eventually, I'd go... 203 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:45,520 "Oh, good night." 204 00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:48,320 Then she could sleep. 205 00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:16,440 Do you want a tea? 206 00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:19,360 Uh... No, I'm fine, thanks. 207 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:25,800 Bloody hell, who died? 208 00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:28,040 Tony's dad died, um, last night. 209 00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:30,360 Oh, no. 210 00:11:31,120 --> 00:11:33,040 - Oh, no. - No, but don't, um... 211 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:36,000 Oh, I'm so sorry about your dad. Oh! 212 00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:38,520 She didn't get the memo. 213 00:11:39,680 --> 00:11:40,760 Cheers, Kath. 214 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:43,400 He had a good innings, as they say. 215 00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:46,640 Er... Carry on, everyone. 216 00:11:47,360 --> 00:11:48,360 A job's come in, 217 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:50,600 but I can cover it on my own, you don't need to worry. 218 00:11:50,680 --> 00:11:51,680 I'm fine. 219 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:53,960 Look, everyone, I'm fine. 220 00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:57,520 I lost him a couple of years ago, to be honest, so... 221 00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:58,920 got me used to the idea. 222 00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:00,240 Um... 223 00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:03,320 It's not like Lisa, it's the natural order of things. 224 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:04,920 Um... 225 00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:06,600 I'll still miss him, obviously, 226 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,240 more than if it had been sudden, in a way. Um... 227 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,480 Once he got ill, I saw him every day. 228 00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:15,880 Before he was ill, I saw him about once a month. 229 00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:18,800 Life goes on. So... 230 00:12:19,680 --> 00:12:20,680 back to normal. 231 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:22,080 Yeah. 232 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,080 You look sad. 233 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:31,800 Good work. 234 00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:34,320 - What's the story? - Um... 235 00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:38,920 "Fifty-year-old man identifies as eight-year-old schoolgirl." 236 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,040 Now we're talking! 237 00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:44,440 Er... 238 00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:46,000 And, Tracy, 239 00:12:46,080 --> 00:12:48,560 what do you... make of all this? 240 00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:52,080 - Well, it's bloody ridiculous. - It's not. 241 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:55,280 It is, it's embarrassing. It's a load of bollocks. 242 00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:58,120 I'm trans, deal with it. 243 00:12:58,200 --> 00:12:59,920 You're not trans, you're having a breakdown. 244 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:00,960 Transphobic. 245 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:03,720 - It's not transphobic, you're not trans. - I am trans. 246 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,560 I haven't got a problem with trans people. Real trans people. 247 00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:09,880 I couldn't give a shit what gender people want to be, or become, 248 00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:12,120 or what they want to be called, how they want to dress, 249 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,296 or if they keep the knob or fanny they were born with, 250 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:15,600 I couldn't give a shit. 251 00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:18,480 But you are not trans, you're having a fucking breakdown. 252 00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:22,760 - I identify... as an eight-year-old girl. - Well, you're not an eight-year-old girl. 253 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:25,040 You are what you identify as. 254 00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:27,880 He pulls this sort of shit all the time. 255 00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,720 He saw a documentary once about ME, had that for a year. 256 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:34,200 That was a nightmare! You're tired all the time. I couldn't work. 257 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:35,280 It was bullshit. 258 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:39,360 There is a lot of misunderstanding and cynicism about the disease. 259 00:13:39,440 --> 00:13:41,640 Yeah, and you didn't fucking have it, you moron. 260 00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:46,040 Silly twat thought he caught Down syndrome last year. 261 00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:47,880 I was seven! 262 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:49,320 Oh, fuck me! 263 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:51,560 You're a 50-year-old plumber from Sheffield. 264 00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:53,400 Your name's Dennis, for fuck's sake. 265 00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:55,600 - It's Denise. - I am not calling you Denise. 266 00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:58,880 Again, transphobic, you see. If you loved me, you'd deal with it. 267 00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:01,480 Well, I do love you. But I married Dennis Charlton. 268 00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:04,680 And if that's no longer your name, then I'm not married to you. 269 00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:07,760 Right. Once and for all... 270 00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:10,240 I identify as an eight-year-old girl called Denise. 271 00:14:10,640 --> 00:14:12,920 Therefore, I am an eight-year-old girl. 272 00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,800 Well, tell that to your cock and bollocks, you silly cunt. 273 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:18,896 Everyone knows what's in your knickers, and if you're an eight-year-old girl, 274 00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:21,160 you've been shoplifting from the local fucking butchers. 275 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:26,160 - What's going on? - Ay-up, love. 276 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,640 It's the local paper. They're going to do a bit on us. 277 00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,160 Dad! 278 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:32,920 Do you want to play dollies later? 279 00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:37,320 Take a picture. 280 00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:38,400 - Yeah. - Yeah. 281 00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,720 Is that going to be in the paper? 282 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:55,000 Er... Yeah, I guess so. 283 00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:56,560 Oh, I want to kill myself! 284 00:14:56,640 --> 00:14:59,200 No, you don't. We don't have to mention you. 285 00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:00,840 He's still your dad. 286 00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:03,200 How can he be my dad if he's an eight-year-old girl now? 287 00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:05,160 We both know he's not an eight-year-old girl. 288 00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:07,000 He's... your dad, 289 00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:09,200 and you'll miss him when he's not around. 290 00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:12,040 - My dad died yesterday. - Really? 291 00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:13,920 Yeah. I miss him. 292 00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:15,800 And I'm old. 293 00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:18,320 - You love him, don't you? - Yeah. 294 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,040 Course you do, he's your dad. 295 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:23,000 You might have to remind him of that now and again, but... 296 00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:24,840 one day, you'll both laugh about this. 297 00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:26,800 - When? - Dunno. 298 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:28,720 When he's 12? 299 00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:32,960 I'll see you later. 300 00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:38,560 Poor kid. 301 00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,280 Wife weren't that happy. 302 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:42,560 I know, he's having a breakdown, in't he? 303 00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:44,840 - You think? - What do you mean? 304 00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:46,960 Well, you don't believe he's just trans? 305 00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:50,040 I dunno. As I say, I'm old. 306 00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:54,840 - He could be trans and having a breakdown. - Yeah. Anything's possible these days. 307 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:59,120 - Do you still get transvestites? - What do you mean? 308 00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:04,000 Well... now, people are transgender, ain't they, or gender fluid? 309 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:08,400 So, a bloke can say, "I identify as a bloke or a woman," 310 00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:10,920 and that's their gender, whatever they say it is. 311 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,960 - Right. - Well, years ago, 312 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:14,680 you used to have transsexuals, 313 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:17,480 where you'd have an operation to become a proper bird. 314 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,560 And you had transvestites, 315 00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:22,800 you know, blokes that liked to dress up as a bird now and again. 316 00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:25,840 You don't really see them ones anymore. 317 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:27,720 But they were like that fella. 318 00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:31,760 They didn't do all of the, "I identify as a real woman," or anything. 319 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:35,120 Then you had, like, young people being a bit androgynous, 320 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:38,240 wearing makeup for fashion, and they'd grow out of it an' that. 321 00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:41,480 - What's your point? - Well, it's all got a bit serious. 322 00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,160 No one just dresses up as a bird for a laugh anymore. 323 00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,000 Good. It was never that funny. 324 00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:56,640 Uh... my dad died. 325 00:16:57,560 --> 00:16:58,560 Uh... 326 00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:00,120 Oh, Tony. 327 00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:02,640 - I'm so sorry. - Cheers. 328 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,640 - I'm glad you got to see so much of him. - Mm. 329 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:11,760 Such a good son. 330 00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,280 Oh... don't. 331 00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:21,400 I love the fact... you said something nice about me 'cause you know 332 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:25,520 - the guilt will be kicking in about now. - No, no. No, no. 333 00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:29,160 You're a good boy. 334 00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:42,520 Hi. 335 00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:44,040 Um... Roxy's not here. 336 00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,160 Oh, I... Postcard. 337 00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:51,480 "Sorry about your dad. Pat." 338 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:54,760 - Cheers. - Oh, mate. 339 00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:59,080 No, it's not... my dad dying. It's kindness I have a problem with. 340 00:17:59,560 --> 00:18:00,560 Towards me, I mean. 341 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:02,360 I don't think I deserve it. 342 00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:05,120 And... sorry about all the times I was an arsehole to you, 343 00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:06,520 I was just lashing out. 344 00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:08,120 Arsehole? 345 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:09,720 I thought it was banter. 346 00:18:12,040 --> 00:18:14,560 At least you didn't ignore me. Most people do. 347 00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:17,560 You even sent me a postcard once. 348 00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:20,040 And set me up with a prossie. 349 00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:22,200 Sex worker. 350 00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:24,160 Wife, maybe. 351 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:26,800 They're the best. 352 00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:30,320 Cheers. 353 00:18:31,680 --> 00:18:35,560 ♪ There are times that walk from you ♪ 354 00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:40,040 ♪ Like some passing afternoon ♪ 355 00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:46,080 ♪ Summer warmed the open window ♪ 356 00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:49,440 ♪ Of her honeymoon ♪ 357 00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:54,360 ♪ And she chose a yard to burn ♪ 358 00:18:55,120 --> 00:18:58,880 ♪ But the ground remembers her ♪ 359 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:04,960 ♪ Wooden spoons Her children stir her ♪ 360 00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:09,440 ♪ Bougainvillea blooms ♪ 361 00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:13,040 ♪ There are things that drift away ♪ 362 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:17,920 ♪ Like our endless numbered days ♪ 363 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:23,040 ♪ Autumn blew the quilt right off ♪ 364 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:27,160 ♪ The perfect bed she made ♪ 365 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:32,040 - ♪ And she's chosen to believe ♪ - Good girl. 366 00:19:32,720 --> 00:19:36,680 ♪ In the hymns her mother sings ♪ 367 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:42,200 ♪ Sometimes, with the windows closed ♪ 368 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:45,920 ♪ She'll sit and think of me ♪ 369 00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:50,680 ♪ But she'll mend his tattered clothes ♪ 370 00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:55,320 ♪ And they'll kiss as if they know ♪ 371 00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,960 ♪ Baby sleeps in all our bones ♪ 372 00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:07,720 ♪ So scared to be alone ♪ 373 00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:12,600 We meet here today to honor and pay tribute 374 00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:14,160 to the life of Ray Johnson, 375 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:16,920 and to express our love and admiration for him. 376 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,760 Also to try to bring some comfort 377 00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:22,880 to those of his family and friends who are here and grieving. 378 00:20:23,400 --> 00:20:25,120 Today is also a day for memories. 379 00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:27,360 I didn't know Ray well, 380 00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:30,520 but someone who did is his beloved son Tony, 381 00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:33,760 who would like to share some personal thoughts with you. Tony. 382 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:49,560 Dad was born in 1939. 383 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:52,360 Uh... He used to say... 384 00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:55,880 he was such an ugly baby that Hitler declared war. 385 00:20:57,760 --> 00:20:59,520 He was such an easygoing man. 386 00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:03,360 You could say he had no big ambition, he worked hard, 387 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:05,040 enjoyed a drink, 388 00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:09,120 fell in love, got married, had a kid, 389 00:21:10,120 --> 00:21:12,760 did all the things he had to do to provide 390 00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,600 and live an average life, I guess. 391 00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:17,800 When Mum died... 392 00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,320 ...who he loved more than anything, 393 00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:22,480 I'd never seen... 394 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:24,400 such a lovely pair. 395 00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,160 I think that's where I got that beautiful dream from, 396 00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:31,320 that you could bump into the perfect soulmate 397 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:34,520 on this planet of seven or eight billion people. 398 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:36,800 Anyway, 399 00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:39,320 when Mum died, he was broken. 400 00:21:39,520 --> 00:21:42,040 Uh... But he even did that alone. 401 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:43,680 He was old school. 402 00:21:44,480 --> 00:21:46,000 Just because you're unhappy 403 00:21:46,080 --> 00:21:48,800 doesn't mean you have to make everyone else miserable. 404 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:51,920 The opposite to my approach. 405 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:55,560 He coped. 406 00:21:56,800 --> 00:21:58,400 Until he couldn't anymore. Uh... 407 00:21:58,600 --> 00:22:01,080 And that's where... Emma came in. 408 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:04,920 Thank you for looking after him. 409 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,200 He, uh... He loved you. 410 00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:12,640 I can see why. 411 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:20,840 Thank you. Cheers. Thanks for coming. 412 00:22:20,920 --> 00:22:23,560 Thanks. Cheers. Thank you. Cheers. 413 00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:24,920 Bye-bye. Thanks. 414 00:22:26,360 --> 00:22:28,760 Yeah. Good, yeah. Cheers. Thanks for coming. 415 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:30,480 Thank you. Cheers. See you soon. 416 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,880 Bye-bye. See you later. Cheers, man. Thanks for coming, Kath. 417 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:42,560 So...? 418 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:46,120 Well... I see you every day. 419 00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:48,360 It's lovely. I get a lovely feeling. 420 00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:51,080 Why can't it just carry on like that and then we die? 421 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:54,440 Yeah. Groundhog Day. 422 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,560 It might not always be like that. I'm... better than I was. 423 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:00,320 Maybe one day I won't feel... 424 00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:03,400 like I'm being unfaithful to my wife, but... 425 00:23:03,880 --> 00:23:05,840 I just can't... I can't promise... 426 00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:11,160 You know... I love this, but... 427 00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:13,080 it can't be any more. 428 00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:16,000 You know? 429 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:17,840 Hm. 430 00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:21,920 Well, I'm sorry again... about your dad. 431 00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:26,880 Hello. 432 00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:31,240 - You OK? - Yeah. 433 00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:32,720 Um... 434 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:33,800 You... 435 00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:37,640 Thanks for everything. 436 00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:02,520 - Anyone sitting here? - No. 437 00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:07,680 Just needed to sit down for a bit. 438 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:10,680 Can't walk for too long now. 439 00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:13,280 Everything is starting to ache. 440 00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:15,280 Ah... I won't be long. 441 00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:17,840 Sit as long as you like. 442 00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:23,520 That your husband? 443 00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:25,320 Yes. 444 00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:30,120 I lost my wife a little while back. 445 00:24:31,440 --> 00:24:33,440 I'm still not over it. 446 00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:35,960 I mean, there's nothing special about that, I know. 447 00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:39,080 I bet you feel the same. 448 00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:41,560 Yes. 449 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:48,520 "In three words, I can sum up everything I've learned about life. 450 00:24:50,360 --> 00:24:51,520 It goes on." 451 00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:54,120 Robert Frost. 452 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:56,600 - Yes! - Wonderful. 453 00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:02,320 Yes. 454 00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:04,280 Life goes on. 455 00:25:04,680 --> 00:25:06,240 It's not as good... 456 00:25:09,120 --> 00:25:10,240 ...but there you go. 457 00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:16,480 ♪ Heard you in the distance ♪ 458 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,840 ♪ A storm on the scope ♪ 459 00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:25,840 ♪ Almighty thunder coming for me I hoped ♪ 460 00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:31,960 ♪ Rolled over the horizon ♪ 461 00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:36,040 ♪ Swept up it all ♪ 462 00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:42,880 ♪ Batten the hatches And teardrops and branches ♪ 463 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:48,560 ♪ But I hear the silence now ♪ 464 00:25:49,280 --> 00:25:51,640 ♪ Right in my core ♪ 465 00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:56,560 ♪ I never heard silence ♪ 466 00:25:57,400 --> 00:25:59,840 ♪ Like this before ♪ 467 00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:04,680 ♪ Yeah, I hear the silence now ♪ 468 00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:08,320 ♪ From wall to wall ♪ 469 00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:12,680 ♪ Never heard silence ♪ 470 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,920 ♪ Like this before ♪ 471 00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:23,560 ♪ Plane flies so high ♪ 472 00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:26,960 ♪ Can't be seen or heard ♪ 473 00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:30,400 ♪ Looking down on the hills ♪ 474 00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:35,600 ♪ Looking down on all the birds ♪ 475 00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:38,760 Good night, gorgeous. 476 00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:41,240 Say it back. 477 00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:44,760 You gotta say it back, or I won't sleep. 478 00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:47,480 Good night. 479 00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:49,840 You said it? 480 00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:52,480 Yeah. 481 00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,280 Good. Now I can sleep. 482 00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:01,920 ♪ But I hear the silence now ♪ 483 00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:05,440 ♪ From wall to wall ♪ 484 00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,640 ♪ Never heard silence ♪ 485 00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:14,440 ♪ Like this before ♪ 486 00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:13,560 Hi. 487 00:28:14,040 --> 00:28:15,400 I'll take Groundhog Day. 488 00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:35,240 ♪ The only thing that keeps me From driving this car ♪ 489 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:44,040 ♪ Half-light, jack knife Into the canyon at night ♪ 490 00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:49,960 ♪ Signs and wonders ♪ 491 00:28:50,040 --> 00:28:53,400 ♪ Perseus aligned with the skull ♪ 492 00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:58,680 ♪ Slain Medusa ♪ 493 00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:02,040 ♪ Pegasus alight from us all ♪ 494 00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:08,040 ♪ Do I care if I survive this? ♪ 495 00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:11,560 ♪ Bury the dead where they're found ♪ 496 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:16,640 ♪ In a veil of great surprises ♪ 497 00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:19,960 ♪ I wonder did you love me at all? ♪ 36393

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