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1
00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:30,662
Hey, you wanna do some stuff?
2
00:00:41,442 --> 00:00:44,409
We've got some serious
air miles here.
3
00:00:44,478 --> 00:00:46,145
Bahamas.
4
00:00:48,416 --> 00:00:49,615
Ooh.
5
00:00:49,617 --> 00:00:51,550
Oh my God.
6
00:00:54,621 --> 00:00:56,488
Actually, no, I need
my Good Timez folder.
7
00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:04,562
Somebody in this room is gonna
have a really good old time.
8
00:01:04,598 --> 00:01:06,965
Yes! You like that?
9
00:01:06,967 --> 00:01:08,800
You want some more? Yeah!
10
00:01:08,803 --> 00:01:09,835
Oh! Ow.
11
00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:12,170
♪ I feel it, I feel it, I feel it ♪
12
00:01:12,306 --> 00:01:13,571
Back in!
13
00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:29,788
♪ You and your body
14
00:01:29,857 --> 00:01:32,925
♪ Every single portion
15
00:01:33,060 --> 00:01:36,862
♪ Send chills up and down your spine
16
00:01:36,931 --> 00:01:39,598
♪ Juices flowin' down your thigh
17
00:01:39,667 --> 00:01:41,466
♪ If you're horny
18
00:01:41,469 --> 00:01:43,502
♪ Let's do it
19
00:01:43,637 --> 00:01:44,803
♪ Ride it,
20
00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:46,538
♪ My pony
21
00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:49,675
♪ My saddle's waitin'
22
00:01:49,677 --> 00:01:50,676
♪ Come and ♪
23
00:01:50,678 --> 00:01:52,044
Hey, mind if I come in?
24
00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:53,412
Okay, most people
knock, but, um-
25
00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:54,413
Can I just park my
26
00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:55,480
kit-and-caboodle
right there?
27
00:01:55,516 --> 00:01:56,515
Your what?
Your uh...
28
00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:57,815
Well, actually, I don't
have a place to put it
29
00:01:57,852 --> 00:01:58,884
'cause I don't
have an office
30
00:01:58,953 --> 00:02:00,285
and I need my hands free
to touch myself, stuff.
31
00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:01,486
Ooh, I don't
think that-
32
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:02,587
Don't worry. It doesn't
make you feel uncomfortable
33
00:02:02,656 --> 00:02:04,222
because you are
my therapist.
34
00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:05,190
HR, actually.
35
00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:06,558
Well, there's an "H"
and an "R" in therapy,
36
00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:08,293
so basically you
are my therapist.
37
00:02:08,329 --> 00:02:09,561
Anyway, Mo, suddenly
it's like Shazam!
38
00:02:09,696 --> 00:02:10,628
All I can think about is sex.
39
00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:12,030
It's new for me.
40
00:02:12,032 --> 00:02:13,031
I could hump
anything, Mo.
41
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:14,433
And I mean,
like, anything.
42
00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:17,169
Oh my God, look at
the curve on that...
43
00:02:19,506 --> 00:02:21,573
Oh my God, I'm so horny.
44
00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:22,608
Oh God.
45
00:02:22,743 --> 00:02:24,075
Okay Kris, I'm gonna
have to ask you to go.
46
00:02:24,111 --> 00:02:25,243
I have a lot of work to do.
47
00:02:25,279 --> 00:02:27,045
No!
48
00:02:27,114 --> 00:02:28,046
Please go.
49
00:02:28,115 --> 00:02:29,114
I'm going.
- Just go, please.
50
00:02:29,116 --> 00:02:30,248
Yeah, I'm going.
- Please go.
51
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:32,517
That's one big ball.
52
00:02:37,725 --> 00:02:40,259
Evan, Kris and I
choose the guests.
53
00:02:40,394 --> 00:02:43,162
Yes, and I let you do
that the first two times,
54
00:02:43,297 --> 00:02:44,897
but the show
needs sex appeal.
55
00:02:45,032 --> 00:02:47,365
It just needs to be
sexier, all right?
56
00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:48,867
You've heard of Dr. Connors?
57
00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:51,937
She writes a syndicated column, "The Doctor Is Into It."
58
00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:53,672
Oh yeah,
I read that book.
59
00:02:53,741 --> 00:02:54,873
- I really like it.
- Uh-huh.
60
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:55,741
Uh, Kris?
- Yeah.
61
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,308
Let's put that down.
- Okay.
62
00:02:57,344 --> 00:02:59,544
Dr. Connors' new book
is on The New York Times
63
00:02:59,547 --> 00:03:01,613
Best Seller list.
64
00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:03,682
It is huge that
I got her.
65
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:04,883
She knows everything
66
00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:06,284
about straight
people sex.
67
00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:07,285
Everything?
68
00:03:10,157 --> 00:03:11,223
Okay, Evan.
69
00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:14,059
We'll take your
guest this time.
70
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,327
See? It's all
I wanted,
71
00:03:15,462 --> 00:03:16,494
just tit
for tat.
72
00:03:16,564 --> 00:03:18,096
I like sex.
73
00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:19,731
I like it.
74
00:03:20,834 --> 00:03:22,100
Do I need to throw a
bucket of water on you?
75
00:03:22,102 --> 00:03:23,635
What's going on?
76
00:03:25,773 --> 00:03:27,105
I think a sex episode
has potential
77
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:28,173
to reach a lot of women.
78
00:03:28,308 --> 00:03:29,307
Oh my gosh, I agree.
79
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:30,642
Like some women are
losing their mojo
80
00:03:30,777 --> 00:03:31,709
and that is not acceptable.
81
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:33,712
And I think they would
love some advice
82
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,514
on how to get that back.
83
00:03:35,649 --> 00:03:38,183
Listen, I know women in their
40s who are so wildly horny
84
00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:39,985
they may pass out,
possibly die,
85
00:03:39,987 --> 00:03:41,787
if they are not
penetrated immediately.
86
00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:44,322
I think that they could
use professional help.
87
00:03:44,391 --> 00:03:46,524
These women don't
need professionals.
88
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:47,926
They just need dating apps.
89
00:03:47,995 --> 00:03:49,227
What?
90
00:03:49,230 --> 00:03:50,829
Here, see this guy here?
91
00:03:50,831 --> 00:03:51,997
So he's like,
"Hey, what's up?"
92
00:03:51,999 --> 00:03:53,065
I'm like,
"Not much. You?"
93
00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:54,066
He's like,
"Going to the gym."
94
00:03:54,201 --> 00:03:56,334
And then I go in with
a lowercase, "wow."
95
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:57,469
And then what?
96
00:03:57,604 --> 00:03:59,004
Twenty minutes later I'm at
the gym getting it done.
97
00:03:59,006 --> 00:04:00,105
What if you don't
have a gym membership?
98
00:04:00,174 --> 00:04:01,606
I think we all need to
be a little bit more open
99
00:04:01,675 --> 00:04:02,674
about sex, you know?
100
00:04:02,676 --> 00:04:03,675
That's how I am
with my partners.
101
00:04:03,711 --> 00:04:04,743
Partners. Plural?
102
00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:06,144
Yeah, I'm poly.
103
00:04:06,146 --> 00:04:08,813
Oh, wow. I think, you know,
some women are finding it hard
104
00:04:08,849 --> 00:04:10,282
to ramp themselves
up for one person,
105
00:04:10,351 --> 00:04:11,683
let alone a squad.
106
00:04:11,818 --> 00:04:14,419
Oh, yeah, I get that
even with the 'cule'.
107
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,353
The...
- Polycule.
108
00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:16,621
Oh.
109
00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:18,956
Yeah, you know, it's the same
ol', same ol', ah, boring.
110
00:04:18,993 --> 00:04:20,692
You know, that's why you gotta
mix things up a little bit,
111
00:04:20,728 --> 00:04:21,893
do something different.
112
00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:23,828
Yeah, you could try
rope-play, role-play.
113
00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:24,696
Ooh, voyeurism.
114
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:26,598
You're like, who's in there?
115
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:27,833
Or you can just
go to a sex shop.
116
00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:30,568
Hmm. Yeah, a sex shop.
117
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:31,636
Yeah, that's it.
118
00:04:31,672 --> 00:04:33,038
That would be great
research for the episode.
119
00:04:33,107 --> 00:04:34,506
Yup. Yes.
120
00:04:34,641 --> 00:04:35,840
A sex shop.
121
00:04:37,244 --> 00:04:38,710
Oh my God, Julie.
122
00:04:38,746 --> 00:04:41,246
I'm in dong heaven.
- Okay.
123
00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:42,580
I might pass out.
124
00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,916
Well why don't you dive
into that dong heaven
125
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:47,385
and I will research
over here alone.
126
00:04:47,454 --> 00:04:49,420
Okay, I'm blinded.
You blinded me.
127
00:04:50,858 --> 00:04:52,491
Do, do you serve water?
128
00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:54,025
All you and all of me.
129
00:04:54,061 --> 00:04:55,259
This is great.
130
00:04:55,296 --> 00:04:56,395
And I like you and you like me.
131
00:04:56,397 --> 00:04:57,529
Here we go.
132
00:04:57,598 --> 00:05:00,465
You get a dong and you get
a dong and you get a dong.
133
00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:01,333
And you get a dong.
134
00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:02,334
Nice to meet you.
135
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:03,935
I'm the gold at the
end of a rainbow.
136
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,404
I'm gonna kiss you,
I won't, I won't touch it.
137
00:05:05,406 --> 00:05:06,338
I didn't touch them.
138
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,307
Dong da da dong da
da da da da da dong.
139
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:09,741
Br-iiiing.
140
00:05:09,777 --> 00:05:10,742
Dongs!
141
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:13,011
Hi. Are you looking for lube?
142
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,746
We have a lot of great options.
143
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:15,814
I'm just browsing.
144
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:17,349
I do not need lube.
145
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,554
Oh, you really cannot go
wrong with anal beads.
146
00:05:22,689 --> 00:05:23,722
Yes, I'm sure I could.
147
00:05:23,857 --> 00:05:26,624
I can't even get the cord
on my vacuum to retract.
148
00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:33,431
Oh, you'll definitely
need lube for that.
149
00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:34,966
I prefer to browse solo.
150
00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:37,102
Okay.
151
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,106
Oh my gosh.
152
00:05:41,241 --> 00:05:43,441
Sharon, my best friend
from the doctor's office.
153
00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:44,776
Oh, please tell me that
you're not calling
154
00:05:44,911 --> 00:05:46,378
to cancel my appointment.
155
00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:48,446
Not cancelling. Just moving.
156
00:05:48,582 --> 00:05:51,783
Doctor Kent is out of office
for a pharmaceutical luncheon.
157
00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:53,251
How's next Wednesday?
158
00:05:53,287 --> 00:05:56,321
Yeah, I mean, well I,
159
00:05:56,390 --> 00:05:57,389
I guess I don't
really have a choice.
160
00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:58,990
Do I? Do I? I...
161
00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:02,594
Yes, that would be great.
162
00:06:05,932 --> 00:06:07,399
How you like me now, Michael?
163
00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:09,667
Am I suddenly more promotable?
164
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:12,003
Ooh, look at me, I'm Michael.
165
00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:14,272
I like marketing
and failing upward.
166
00:06:14,308 --> 00:06:15,540
Well, you know what, Michael?
167
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:17,876
Watch my shatter that glass
ceiling with my lady dick.
168
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,811
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew, pew!
169
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:20,879
'Cause you know what Michael?
170
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:21,813
I don't give a fuck.
171
00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:23,481
I got no fucks left to...
172
00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,819
My fucks are finite.
173
00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:31,889
I have a finite
amount of fucks.
174
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:44,836
Kris, can I see you in the change room, please?
175
00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:45,837
Julie?
176
00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:47,472
I need your help.
177
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:50,908
Hello. Hello.
178
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:51,977
Absolutely no
judgement at all.
179
00:06:52,112 --> 00:06:54,712
I think you're fine,
but how does that happen?
180
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:56,381
Okay, well, I-I-I
tried to push it down
181
00:06:56,383 --> 00:06:57,349
and that didn't work
182
00:06:57,484 --> 00:06:58,783
and then I thought well,
maybe if I pull it up.
183
00:06:58,819 --> 00:07:00,585
That really didn't work
and now I'm trapped.
184
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:02,187
Okay, it's fine. It's fine.
185
00:07:02,322 --> 00:07:03,922
Why don't you turn around?
You turn around.
186
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:04,856
Okay, here we go.
187
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,258
I get that.
- Okay.
188
00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:07,859
This is my husband.
He's all right.
189
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:09,260
You'd hit that?
190
00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:10,262
Is that a trick question,
191
00:07:10,397 --> 00:07:11,663
'cause I'd hit
anything right now.
192
00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:12,931
I could have hit
that last night,
193
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,167
but I didn't,
so that's one F wasted.
194
00:07:15,302 --> 00:07:17,068
I am running out
of sexual road.
195
00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:19,337
My gosh, Julie.
- What?
196
00:07:19,406 --> 00:07:21,673
Is that one of those
symptoms of menopause?
197
00:07:21,808 --> 00:07:22,941
Mm-hmm.
198
00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:24,676
Oh my God. Kris!
199
00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:25,744
Not now!
200
00:07:25,746 --> 00:07:27,245
Oh my God!
- Just get it off me!
201
00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:30,949
Okay, but this guy
is really relentless!
202
00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:31,883
Okay, focus!
203
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:33,018
I am focused.
204
00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:34,553
I am really focused.
205
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:36,955
This is very
hard for me right now
206
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,089
because I'm kind of turned on.
207
00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:40,157
I'm just gonna sit
here for a second.
208
00:07:40,194 --> 00:07:44,095
So your total
today is $1,200.
209
00:07:44,097 --> 00:07:45,697
Do you have a,
uh, payment plan?
210
00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:46,832
No.
211
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:50,035
Good. What can I get for this?
212
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:52,169
Oh, also a dime.
213
00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:56,040
Oh my gosh. Good.
214
00:07:56,109 --> 00:07:57,108
Perfect. Discreet.
215
00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,776
It's subtle,
vulnerable, like me.
216
00:07:58,846 --> 00:08:00,578
Thank you. Amazing.
217
00:08:00,714 --> 00:08:02,647
Just so you know, we do
have a strict store policy.
218
00:08:02,782 --> 00:08:04,448
You try it, you buy it.
219
00:08:13,193 --> 00:08:15,460
Shiiitt.
220
00:08:15,529 --> 00:08:17,128
Oh my God!
221
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:25,804
Okay, okay. It's okay. It's okay.
222
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:27,005
It'll be fine.
223
00:08:28,475 --> 00:08:30,509
That's a UTI
waiting to happen.
224
00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:33,745
Ugh.
225
00:08:33,814 --> 00:08:36,014
Oh my God.
226
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,753
What are ya doing?
227
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:45,189
Where, what are you doing?
228
00:08:45,259 --> 00:08:46,624
What do you think?
229
00:08:46,660 --> 00:08:48,626
Are you okay?
230
00:08:48,662 --> 00:08:50,161
Pshht. Am I okay?
231
00:08:50,297 --> 00:08:51,763
Well...
232
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:53,364
I just think that...
233
00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:56,033
Could you help me set
up a dating profile?
234
00:08:56,069 --> 00:08:57,368
And by help,
I mean do it for me.
235
00:08:57,404 --> 00:08:59,837
Oh my God, gimme your phone.
Yep, this is what I live for.
236
00:09:07,381 --> 00:09:09,114
Oh, Oliver, hurry up.
Your ride's here.
237
00:09:09,249 --> 00:09:10,515
I can't find my
new shin guards!
238
00:09:10,650 --> 00:09:11,582
Oh, um-
239
00:09:11,618 --> 00:09:13,417
They're in a bag on the table.
240
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:17,589
You're welcome.
241
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:18,790
I love you.
242
00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:19,824
We are outta coffee.
243
00:09:19,860 --> 00:09:21,025
I'm gonna run to the store.
You want anything?
244
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:24,129
Actually, I was thinking
that we could hang out here.
245
00:09:24,264 --> 00:09:27,065
Maybe, um, do some stuff?
246
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,667
Oh yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
247
00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:29,968
Really?
- Mm-hmm.
248
00:09:30,103 --> 00:09:31,069
Okay.
- Okay.
249
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:34,072
Come on.
- Oh. Hmm.
250
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,373
Actually.
251
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:36,974
Oh, what are you doing?
252
00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:40,478
I am exploring
my finite fucks.
253
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:41,646
I have some plans for you.
254
00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:42,713
Tell me all about them.
255
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,482
Oh, I'm going to
in great detail.
256
00:09:44,518 --> 00:09:45,750
- Oh, I , sorry.
- Oh, no, what?
257
00:09:45,885 --> 00:09:47,018
No, there's something
poking me in the back.
258
00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:48,686
Oh, okay.
- Don't go anywhere.
259
00:09:48,822 --> 00:09:50,288
Oh my God, look.
260
00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:51,356
Oliver's shin guards.
261
00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:54,692
- Oh no.
- What?
262
00:09:54,828 --> 00:09:56,160
Oh, no, no.
263
00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:58,262
Oh, no, no!
264
00:09:58,332 --> 00:09:59,330
Oh my God, Pete.
265
00:09:59,333 --> 00:10:00,398
Pete, you have
to get in the car
266
00:10:00,467 --> 00:10:01,833
and you have to go and
get Oliver right now!
267
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:02,801
What is going on?
268
00:10:02,803 --> 00:10:03,835
There's no time to explain!
269
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:05,570
I just, I need you to get
that bag back right now,
270
00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:07,772
or we are gonna have to do some
really high-level parenting
271
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:09,273
in about an hour!
272
00:10:11,144 --> 00:10:12,610
Oh, wow.
273
00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:14,646
I can't believe
you're almost fifty.
274
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,047
You look good for your age.
275
00:10:16,182 --> 00:10:17,682
Well, thank you.
276
00:10:17,817 --> 00:10:18,850
Oh, you're welcome.
277
00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:21,853
You know what? Just, here.
278
00:10:21,855 --> 00:10:23,855
- Like, I'm gonna.
- Oh yeah.
279
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:24,789
Oh, that's good. Yeah.
280
00:10:24,924 --> 00:10:26,124
That's supposed to
be a sexy move.
281
00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:27,859
We're gonna have sex.
282
00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:29,293
To the floor.
- Okay.
283
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:31,396
There, is that a
splinter in there?
284
00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:32,330
Uh....
285
00:10:32,399 --> 00:10:33,531
You know what?
Save that for later.
286
00:10:33,533 --> 00:10:35,032
Oh, you look like a pirate.
287
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:37,802
Argh.
288
00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:39,370
That's my hook.
289
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:41,106
There you go. Try again.
290
00:10:41,241 --> 00:10:43,107
Oh, you're
heavier than you look.
291
00:10:43,176 --> 00:10:44,709
I think you're supposed
to be around this area
292
00:10:44,711 --> 00:10:45,743
is where you're gonna go.
293
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:46,944
Whoop, oh no, whoop!
- I'm sorry.
294
00:10:47,014 --> 00:10:48,213
What's going on?
295
00:10:48,215 --> 00:10:51,149
You're like a gargoyle
with better skincare.
296
00:10:51,284 --> 00:10:53,718
Grab it while it's hot.
Grab it while it's hot.
297
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,486
I'm gonna come right into
that meat and two veg.
298
00:10:55,522 --> 00:10:56,454
Get in here.
299
00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:57,956
Okay, count me in Jet Man.
300
00:10:57,958 --> 00:10:59,858
Three, two, one.
301
00:11:01,227 --> 00:11:02,193
Aye aye!
302
00:11:02,195 --> 00:11:03,795
Chips ahoy, mate.
303
00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:07,465
No one wants to fuck
a seagull, buddy.
304
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,507
Please God, not now.
305
00:11:16,543 --> 00:11:17,942
What?
- Nothing.
306
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,116
Let's play a game.
307
00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:26,818
Cover your eyes.
- I love games.
308
00:11:26,820 --> 00:11:28,119
Oh good! I love games.
309
00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:29,354
And you're great.
310
00:11:29,489 --> 00:11:31,523
Okay, um, I need you to,
you know, get off the bed.
311
00:11:31,658 --> 00:11:34,592
Keep them covered.
No peeking! Okay?
312
00:11:34,594 --> 00:11:36,661
Yeah, and then you,
and then you face the wall.
313
00:11:36,796 --> 00:11:38,329
Go! Go, that's it, just-
314
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:39,864
This is hot.
315
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:44,636
Okay, no peeking, no peeking!
316
00:11:57,917 --> 00:11:59,617
Pilot from the flight deck.
317
00:11:59,653 --> 00:12:01,185
Where are you?
318
00:12:03,256 --> 00:12:04,855
I'm coming to find ya.
319
00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:10,361
Ah!
320
00:12:11,097 --> 00:12:12,830
Did I just slip in?
321
00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:13,965
Yeah.
322
00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:21,839
Okay, uh, so when, uh, two
people love each other...
323
00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:22,907
although, yeah, to be honest,
324
00:12:22,976 --> 00:12:24,442
you don't have to be in
love with each other,
325
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:25,843
it's kind of a
misogynistic construct-
326
00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:27,011
Mom, oh my God.
327
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,714
Good note. Um, okay.
328
00:12:29,716 --> 00:12:32,784
Um, sometimes people
like to try new things
329
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,252
and-and that means toys.
330
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:37,522
Toys.
- Just a fun little toy.
331
00:12:37,524 --> 00:12:39,757
It's true. Listen to
your mother, alright.
332
00:12:39,892 --> 00:12:41,759
Lots of people
like using toys.
333
00:12:41,795 --> 00:12:43,727
You like using this?!
334
00:12:43,764 --> 00:12:44,662
Sure.
335
00:12:44,798 --> 00:12:45,830
It's no big deal, honestly.
336
00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:46,931
You'll see that one...
337
00:12:47,066 --> 00:12:48,532
Oh Lord,
love a duck.
338
00:12:48,534 --> 00:12:50,535
This is the fun little toy?
339
00:12:50,537 --> 00:12:52,537
Why can you just be like
everyone else's parents
340
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:53,605
and fight all the time?
341
00:12:53,607 --> 00:12:54,772
Hey, listen,
342
00:12:54,907 --> 00:12:56,474
you should be happy
that your mother and I
343
00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:57,541
are having sex, alright?
344
00:12:57,543 --> 00:12:59,143
It is part of a
healthy relationship.
345
00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:01,279
Yeah, yeah, we have a lot of
sexual road left ahead of us.
346
00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:02,213
Yes.
- And you know,
347
00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:03,815
we're gonna drive it hard.
348
00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:05,216
Oh, you know what?
- Somebody kill me.
349
00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:06,818
No, it's fine, it did the
same thing in the shop.
350
00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:09,420
Okay, I can't, is that the
off switch or the speed?
351
00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:10,955
It's the speed,
'cause it still on.
352
00:13:11,024 --> 00:13:11,923
Well, it's hard to see.
353
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:13,291
Oli, can you get
my reading glasses?
354
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,826
Oh my God, Mom,
you're ruining my life!
355
00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:22,901
Hmm.
356
00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:25,102
Morning, Kris.
357
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:26,404
Morning!
358
00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:28,039
How was your night?
359
00:13:28,108 --> 00:13:30,875
Uh, yeah, it was um...
360
00:13:32,345 --> 00:13:34,712
Well, I guess I can talk to you
'cause you're my therapist, so.
361
00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:36,181
Uh, no, HR.
- Like therapy.
362
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:37,748
Still HR.
363
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:40,117
Well...
364
00:13:41,388 --> 00:13:44,088
I had my first date,
uh, in eight years.
365
00:13:45,559 --> 00:13:47,225
How'd that go?
366
00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,260
He said I was brave
because my teeth overlapped
367
00:13:49,296 --> 00:13:51,128
and then I got my
period out of nowhere.
368
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:52,397
But it wasn't just any period,
369
00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:54,499
it was like 20 water balloons bursting all at once.
370
00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:55,600
Except they weren't
filled with water,
371
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:56,534
they were filled with blood,
372
00:13:56,603 --> 00:13:57,669
but all different
textures of blood.
373
00:13:57,804 --> 00:13:59,136
It was kind of like,
"What's that? Oh my God.
374
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,604
"Is that like a
chicken's liver?
375
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:03,007
"Or is that just like a skipping
rope and coffee grounds?"
376
00:14:03,142 --> 00:14:05,410
Just like.
377
00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:07,478
And then he slipped in it
and then I cried at the sink.
378
00:14:07,547 --> 00:14:09,146
So how do you think it went?
379
00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:14,152
Sorry.
380
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:17,889
Hello?
381
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,890
We're gonna need to change your appointment again.
382
00:14:19,892 --> 00:14:22,827
Dr. Kent is on vacation
for two weeks.
383
00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:24,061
How's two Fridays from now?
384
00:14:24,130 --> 00:14:26,297
Uh, yes, I'm free,
but I.
385
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:27,965
Have a good day.
386
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,068
So just to circle back:
no second date?
387
00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:33,504
No.
388
00:14:33,573 --> 00:14:35,105
Huh.
389
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:38,976
Ah, aggressively insensitive,
390
00:14:39,012 --> 00:14:40,912
but no, getting
cancelled is hard, right?
391
00:14:40,981 --> 00:14:44,381
Let's keep it out there for our Ball Pit, co-host Billy H.
392
00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:45,582
Uh, moving on.
393
00:14:45,619 --> 00:14:47,852
No!
394
00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:49,320
Oh, okay. So we're
not moving on?
395
00:14:49,455 --> 00:14:50,354
Um, we are moving on.
396
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:51,622
We're moving right along.
397
00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:52,856
And I just would like to say
398
00:14:52,893 --> 00:14:55,326
that I find your passion
for marketing so moving.
399
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,862
Thank you. Um, good.
400
00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:00,465
What happened?
401
00:15:00,467 --> 00:15:01,799
Our main focus today is our current marketing strategies
402
00:15:01,801 --> 00:15:02,733
and how they meet up with...
403
00:15:02,802 --> 00:15:04,768
I had awful sex last night,
just awful.
404
00:15:06,606 --> 00:15:07,872
And then he sent me this.
405
00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:09,407
No!
406
00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:14,078
Stopping you, Evan.
407
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,579
You're a machine.
408
00:15:15,615 --> 00:15:19,316
Great. Just as I was
saying.
409
00:15:19,352 --> 00:15:20,918
What did you do to
that guy's sheets?
410
00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:22,420
Did you ever see the movie,
"There Will Be Blood?"
411
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:23,621
Yeah.
-Yeah.
412
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:25,289
Oh!
- Yeah.
413
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:27,425
Oh God, I'm sorry.
414
00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:28,760
Oh, if it makes you
feel any better,
415
00:15:28,895 --> 00:15:30,561
I had an awful night too.
416
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,830
Not only did my sex
toy not turn me on,
417
00:15:32,866 --> 00:15:35,366
it totally
traumatized my family.
418
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:36,434
I didn't get any sleep,
419
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:37,768
I was up all night Googling.
420
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:39,437
Turns out, you were right.
421
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,372
Low libido is a
symptom of menopause.
422
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:44,642
It's just, I don't have $400.
423
00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:46,177
There's no way you should
pay for that guy's sheets.
424
00:15:46,246 --> 00:15:48,579
How much did you pay
for your nail set,
425
00:15:48,581 --> 00:15:50,514
your nails, your bikini wax,
426
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:51,849
your Uber over there?
427
00:15:51,851 --> 00:15:53,984
To be fair, I'm full
old-school down there
428
00:15:54,020 --> 00:15:54,986
and totally proud.
429
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:56,053
But yeah, between my Spanx,
430
00:15:56,089 --> 00:15:57,455
my k-tape and my
nipple covers,
431
00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:58,523
you know, I think he owes me.
432
00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:00,090
Yes!
433
00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:01,859
Yes.
- So inspiring.
434
00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:03,328
Feeling your work today.
435
00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:06,030
- Our leader. Yeah.- Yeah!
436
00:16:06,066 --> 00:16:07,231
Evan.
437
00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:09,233
Evan!
438
00:16:11,271 --> 00:16:12,703
You know what? I've been thinking.
439
00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:13,671
We should just turn around.
440
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:14,739
I'm gonna write him an email.
441
00:16:14,874 --> 00:16:16,273
We could go grab a donut.
That would be great.
442
00:16:16,275 --> 00:16:17,342
Nope. Nope
- Let's do that, please.
443
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:18,409
Call him now.
- Please.
444
00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:19,477
No.
- Oh my God.
445
00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:20,945
Get your donuts afterwards.
Call him now.
446
00:16:20,947 --> 00:16:22,079
Oh God. I don't want to.
447
00:16:22,215 --> 00:16:23,481
Are we gonna do this?
- Yeah, you're gonna do it.
448
00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:25,349
Oh my God. Here we are.
We're doing it. Ah!
449
00:16:26,419 --> 00:16:28,019
- Hello?
- Hello?
450
00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:29,020
Sexier.
451
00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:30,088
Hello.
452
00:16:30,090 --> 00:16:31,022
Hmm, throw it away.
453
00:16:31,157 --> 00:16:33,091
Okay, no, we are
not doing this.
454
00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:34,291
Hi, uh, it's me Kris.
455
00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:35,493
I'm here with the
money for the sheets.
456
00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:36,828
Be right down.
457
00:16:36,963 --> 00:16:37,962
Okay.
458
00:16:37,964 --> 00:16:39,430
Okay. Okay.
459
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:40,831
You got this. Be cool.
460
00:16:40,867 --> 00:16:42,500
Stay angry. Get in there.
461
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:43,501
Actually,
you know what?
462
00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:44,702
He's the one that
got right in here.
463
00:16:44,704 --> 00:16:45,703
Nope, nope, nope, focus.
464
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,105
Except for that one time
when I was like bah-
465
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:48,573
Focus!
- Focus.
466
00:16:48,708 --> 00:16:51,708
Okay, you know what?
I need you to stay close though.
467
00:16:51,745 --> 00:16:53,044
Stay within touching distance.
468
00:16:53,046 --> 00:16:54,445
We might wanna hold hands.
469
00:16:54,580 --> 00:16:55,913
Hmm, we're not gonna
wanna hold hands.
470
00:16:55,915 --> 00:16:56,848
We might.
- No.
471
00:16:56,983 --> 00:16:57,982
We might.
- No.
472
00:16:57,984 --> 00:16:59,917
Here he comes. Oh my
gosh. Here he comes. Ah.
473
00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:02,487
Hey.
- Hi.
474
00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:03,988
I-I just wanted to say to
you that I don't appreciate
475
00:17:04,123 --> 00:17:05,323
the way that you spoke
to me the other night
476
00:17:05,458 --> 00:17:08,793
saying that I was lucky, uh,
that I could use my forehead
477
00:17:08,795 --> 00:17:10,528
as an extra parking space.
478
00:17:10,597 --> 00:17:12,196
He said that?
479
00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:13,531
Do you know her?
480
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,533
No, I don't. That is just a
woman who speaks too loud.
481
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:16,834
Listen, I really appreciate that
482
00:17:16,969 --> 00:17:19,804
somehow you have
managed to have twelve abs
483
00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:22,006
and then you just have
like a really nice package
484
00:17:22,008 --> 00:17:23,374
that I would hop
on my 10 speed
485
00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:25,877
and drive to any city
to pick up that package.
486
00:17:26,012 --> 00:17:27,912
But no, I'm gonna focus.
487
00:17:27,981 --> 00:17:29,346
And that is not
why we are here.
488
00:17:29,416 --> 00:17:33,551
No, uh, you're here to drop off
some sheets or gimme my money?
489
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:34,785
Asshole.
490
00:17:34,854 --> 00:17:36,053
Asshole. Listen.
491
00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:37,488
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
492
00:17:37,524 --> 00:17:39,156
Do you have any idea
how vulnerable it is
493
00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:41,024
to put yourself out
there and have sex
494
00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:43,060
when you're my age
and you have no idea
495
00:17:43,063 --> 00:17:44,162
what your body's gonna do?
496
00:17:44,164 --> 00:17:45,730
It's terrifying.
- It is terrifying!
497
00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:46,797
Seriously, who is that?
498
00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:48,099
It doesn't matter.
The point is you're a dick.
499
00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:49,166
I mean, a dick
with a nice dick,
500
00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:50,367
but a dick nonetheless.
501
00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:52,436
And I guess you just don't
see women as real people.
502
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:53,704
And that's why
you can tell me
503
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:55,339
that I have "knuckles
like a T-Rex"
504
00:17:55,341 --> 00:17:56,673
and still expect a blowjob.
505
00:17:56,709 --> 00:18:00,777
And I have to learn not to
hate myself that I did it.
506
00:18:04,717 --> 00:18:06,517
Good evening, sir. Oh.
507
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:11,255
Yes, yes.
508
00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:12,789
Oh, hey, Kris.
509
00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:14,926
Yeah?
510
00:18:14,928 --> 00:18:16,093
Could I still get
the money or?
511
00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:17,562
I will end you!
- Oh, oh! I'm sor-
512
00:18:18,565 --> 00:18:20,497
You little piece of shit.
You better run!
513
00:18:21,567 --> 00:18:23,401
Hey, um, Sharon?
514
00:18:23,403 --> 00:18:25,269
This is Dr. Kent's office.
515
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:28,272
Would you mind if we moved your appointment again to possibly-
516
00:18:28,407 --> 00:18:31,275
Sharon, I love you,
I really do.
517
00:18:31,410 --> 00:18:33,411
But I'm just, I'm learning
how to stick up for myself
518
00:18:33,546 --> 00:18:35,546
and I find it hard to function
519
00:18:35,548 --> 00:18:37,615
when you keep changing
the appointment.
520
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:40,885
Listen, I need
to see a doctor.
521
00:18:40,887 --> 00:18:43,854
So, if you could just pick a date
522
00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,990
and if you could
just stick with it,
523
00:18:46,059 --> 00:18:47,558
I would really
appreciate that.
524
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,961
And I still love you
and I love your work.
525
00:18:50,096 --> 00:18:51,095
Understood.
526
00:18:51,097 --> 00:18:52,829
We will make it work from our end.
527
00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:55,967
Thank you.
528
00:18:56,569 --> 00:18:57,768
Yes! Yes!
529
00:18:57,770 --> 00:18:59,170
I fucking did it.
530
00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:01,505
I did it! I did it!
531
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:02,573
You did it!
532
00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:03,507
Oh my God!
533
00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:04,508
Oh your God, I mean-
534
00:19:04,577 --> 00:19:05,510
I love you, Sharon!
535
00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:06,577
Yeah, you told her
you loved her.
536
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:08,646
I did.
-But you got it.
537
00:19:08,781 --> 00:19:10,114
I did it. Great, great.
- Yeah.
538
00:19:10,249 --> 00:19:11,381
I'm buying you a donut.
539
00:19:11,417 --> 00:19:13,016
But you're terrible at that.
540
00:19:20,126 --> 00:19:21,926
I'm having a little
problem here
541
00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:24,595
and I'm wondering if you
could help me with it.
542
00:19:24,631 --> 00:19:25,730
What?
543
00:19:25,865 --> 00:19:28,131
Well, it seems that all of
my pyjamas are in the wash
544
00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:31,001
and so I'm going to
have to sleep nude.
545
00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:32,870
Oh no.
- Mm-hmm.
546
00:19:35,708 --> 00:19:36,874
I'm sorry, I just,
547
00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:38,876
I think we need to talk.
548
00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:40,077
Shit.
- I know.
549
00:19:40,146 --> 00:19:41,078
No, no, it's fair.
550
00:19:41,147 --> 00:19:42,779
I was hoping to distract you.
551
00:19:42,815 --> 00:19:44,415
Okay, it's like, I just
want to understand,
552
00:19:44,550 --> 00:19:45,483
that's the thing, right?
553
00:19:45,618 --> 00:19:48,686
Because we agreed that
there'd be no more butt-
554
00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:50,354
we agreed there'd
be no more butt stuff.
555
00:19:50,423 --> 00:19:52,889
But then you go and get that
thing and what am I supposed?
556
00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:54,492
Yeah, no, no, I'm good.
- Okay.
557
00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:59,997
I just, lately it feels like
you haven't been that into me.
558
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:02,433
No, it's not you, babe.
559
00:20:02,568 --> 00:20:04,769
You are kind and sexy.
560
00:20:04,904 --> 00:20:06,437
Come on, you're a smoke show.
561
00:20:07,807 --> 00:20:10,041
Okay, then what is going on?
562
00:20:10,176 --> 00:20:13,043
You know you can talk to
me about anything, right?
563
00:20:13,079 --> 00:20:14,979
Okay. Well.
564
00:20:17,583 --> 00:20:21,918
I am not
getting any younger,
565
00:20:21,955 --> 00:20:25,389
and our sex life has
always been fantastic.
566
00:20:25,524 --> 00:20:30,294
And I worry that
if that changed-
567
00:20:30,330 --> 00:20:32,930
Hey, if this is about
you turning fifty,
568
00:20:32,932 --> 00:20:36,600
nothing about us is ever
gonna change, alright?
569
00:20:36,669 --> 00:20:39,737
I always, always want
to do stuff with you.
570
00:20:40,807 --> 00:20:42,072
As a matter of fact,
571
00:20:42,141 --> 00:20:44,475
that pyjama problem
you were talking about,
572
00:20:44,610 --> 00:20:45,609
why don't I take a look?
573
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,210
Oh yeah. Oh, no, no, no.
574
00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:48,679
Leave that in.
575
00:20:48,814 --> 00:20:49,947
Leave it in?
- Yeah, I think-
576
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,081
Oh my God, you do
love your toys.
577
00:20:51,150 --> 00:20:52,316
I do. Mm-hmm.
578
00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:53,884
Did you change the
wifi password-
579
00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:55,086
- Oh my God!
- Whoa!
580
00:20:55,221 --> 00:20:58,689
It's 8:30, it should be safe
for me to walk in here!
581
00:20:58,824 --> 00:20:59,756
Ew!
582
00:21:00,793 --> 00:21:02,359
Is it 8:30 already?
583
00:21:02,395 --> 00:21:04,127
♪ Here we go
584
00:21:04,163 --> 00:21:06,163
♪ And all of me and this is great
585
00:21:06,299 --> 00:21:07,898
♪ And I like you and you like me
586
00:21:07,967 --> 00:21:09,099
♪ You get a dong ♪
587
00:21:09,168 --> 00:21:11,235
♪ And you get a dong And you get a dong ♪
588
00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:12,303
♪ And you get a dong ♪
589
00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:13,570
♪ Nice to meet you
590
00:21:13,572 --> 00:21:14,972
♪ I'm like gold at the end of a rainbow
591
00:21:15,041 --> 00:21:16,240
♪ I'm going to keep...
592
00:21:16,375 --> 00:21:17,641
♪ I won't, I won't touch it, I didn't touch them
593
00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:19,777
♪ Dong de-dong de-dong de-dong
594
00:21:19,846 --> 00:21:20,978
♪ Briiiiing! ♪
595
00:21:20,980 --> 00:21:22,112
♪ DONGS! ♪
596
00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:23,314
♪ What do you mean? ♪
597
00:21:23,316 --> 00:21:24,248
♪ I don't give a fuck! ♪
598
00:21:24,383 --> 00:21:25,282
♪ Oh my God, Julie ♪
599
00:21:25,417 --> 00:21:26,583
♪ Pew pew pew pew pew pew pew! ♪
600
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:27,785
♪ You get a dong ♪
601
00:21:27,854 --> 00:21:30,121
♪ And you get a dong And you get a dong ♪
602
00:21:30,123 --> 00:21:31,221
♪ And you get a dong ♪
603
00:21:31,291 --> 00:21:32,790
♪ I'm in Dong heaven ♪
41929
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