All language subtitles for The Sopranos - S04E03 - Christopher.eng.SDH

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

[LAUGHING]

Oh, Massachusetts!

Listen to this shit.

"The New Jersey Council of
Indian Affairs has announced plans

"to disrupt Monday's
Columbus Day Parade in Newark."

"Council Chairman Del Redclay,
professor of cultural anthropology…"

Stop blowing your
nose. I wanna hear this.

"…says council members
and supporters will lie down…"

"…in the path of Columbus Day marchers,
quote, 'in protest of Columbus' role…"

"…in the genocide of America's
native peoples,' unquote."

"To launch their protest, the Native
Americans and their sympathizers"

"plan to begin a deathwatch tomorrow"

over the statue of Columbus
in Christopher Columbus Park."

Some fucking balls, badmouthing
America, especially now.

I thought Columbus
was the hero of America.

No. See, it's these Indians
and the commie fucks.

They wanna paint Columbus as a
slave trader instead of an explorer.

You gotta admit they did
get massacred, the Indians.

It's not like we didn't give
them shit to make up for it.

Land, reservations, and
now they got the casinos.

What the fuck we ever get
we didn't have to work for?

I wouldn't mind sitting on
my ass, smoking mushrooms,

and collecting government checks.

[LAUGHING]

You know what it is?
I'll tell you what it is.

It's anti-Italian discrimination.

Columbus Day is a day of Italian pride.

It's our holiday, and
they wanna take it away.

Fuck them.

But I never liked Columbus.

-Hey!
-Why?

In Napoli, a lot of people are
not so happy for Columbus

because he was from Genoa.

What's the problem with Genoa?

The north of Italy always
have the money and the power.

They punish the south
since hundreds of years.

Even today, they put up their
nose at us like we're peasants.

[SPITS]

I hate the north.

Jesus, take it easy.

I'm gonna take action here.

Ro, gonna go to the
church luncheon tomorrow?

It's on the subject of
Italian-American women and pride.

-I guess because of Columbus Day.
-Who's the star?

A woman professor from Montclair State.

-Father Phil says she's very good.
-You should come, Adriana.

-Me?
-Yeah, come with us.

In the bingo room at
St. Peter and Paul's.

They have a series of
luncheons every week.

The food is good, and the
speakers have been fantastic.

Furio Giunta just bought
himself a little house in Nutley.

-He is so gorgeous.
-I'm surprised nobody's snapped him up.

-I think he should lose the ponytail.
-You do?

-I think it looks great on him.
-That's his trademark.

Sandi Fortunato says it looks
like a dick coming out of his head.

And she pretends to be
his friend. What a two-face.

How much money did you make today, slut?

[SOUND OF VIBRATOR]

Three hundred.

That's all, bitch?

I'm gonna put you back on the street, ho.

Make you work that ass.

Put me back on the street, baby, yeah.

Work that ass, you little cunt.

Yeah, you work it, baby.

Mama's little tramp. Mama's little whore.

-I'm gonna pimp you out, bitch.
-Yeah.

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

I gotta get that.

Hello?

Oh, no, no. Hi, Ro, how are you?

What?

I can't hear you too good.

It must be your cell
phone. You in the car?

Oh, no, no. I'm coming home.

Yeah.

No, chicken's great.

No. Yeah, me too.

Bye.

God, we're so naughty.

How can we do this with Ro on the phone?

What?

We're so wacky.

No regard for nothing, huh?

All right.

[DIAL TONE]

-Operator.
-Yeah, I'd like to make a collect call.

Area code 917…

[PHONE RINGING]

-Speak.
-Collect call from Mr. Walters.

Okay, I'll take it, operator.

-How you doing?
-You know.

Thanks for the stamps.

-How you getting on?
-I feel old.

Hey.

Listen, John

I just want to say, I hope your
feelings weren't hurt too bad,

and that it never got back to the missus.

-What the fuck you talking about?
-You didn't hear the joke about Ginny?

Never mind. Let it die a death.

What joke?

John, you're better off not hearing it.

-Trust me.
-Fuck that! I demand you tell me, Paulie.

John, you got more laborers on
the job site than we got carpenters.

What's the problem?

The problem is the carpenters are
carrying Sheetrock and materials.

-So we ain't getting what we expected.
-Minimally expected.

Hire more laborers off the books.

Nobody's talking to you!

All right, Jesus.

[SIGH]

Sixty-five, 35.

Salute.

Johnny, you explain the other
thing I wanted to talk about.

Sure. Tony, it's come to our attention

you bought property
around Frelinghuysen Avenue.

-And turned it in a week.
-So?

You did it with inside
knowledge from Ron Zellman.

Come to your attention from where?

That property's hot
because of the Esplanade.

We share the Esplanade. We share Zellman.

If the Soprano family's
gonna benefit from a thing

Carmine feels we should have too.

Okay, we'll work something out.

Salute.

I've been your doctor for 30 years,
and you still hate the thermometer.

Tony, Furio's here!

Thank you for bringing
those strufoli, I love those.

Here's a few long-term
bonds I find effective.

Wouldn't it be great if the person
you trust most was your broker?

-Let's look at your allocation.
-We give advice that's objective

uncomplicated and
not driven by commission.

Call 1-800-7-SCHWAB
to set up a consultation

-to check the health of your portfolio.
-And lay off the junk bonds.

-I got pictures of my new house.
-Oh, let me see!

Welcome back. We're here today
with our guest, Dr. Del Redclay

who's a professor of
anthropology at Rutgers University,

and spokesman for
the anti-Columbus protest.

-Oh, my God.
-And also Mr. Phillip L. Di Notti…

It's lovely, Fur.

…president of the Coalition of Italian-
American Anti-Defamation Organizations.

Okay.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

-This thing gets on my nerves.
-Don't get me started.

Let's start with the idea of a parade
for a genocidal colonial general.

A national holiday, no less.

Such festivities are
deeply offensive to us.

These are broad charges.

All I know is

Italian-Americans are extremely
proud of Christopher Columbus.

Admiral of the ocean
seas and a great Italian.

You know well of the
compromise position we put forth.

Now, if you people wanna
make it an Italian-pride parade

we have no problem with that.

History does say Columbus
discovered America.

The America that put your people
in bondage for three centuries.

But every culture has
had to bear the pain

in the making of what
I think we can all agree

is a startling economic miracle.

-We cured polio.
-I have to agree with Phil.

-The right to vote.
-Exactly.

Take my grandparents. Two
simple people from Sicily

who braved the perilous middle passage…

Middle passage? That's
the term for the slave trade.

Montel, the Italian people in this
country also have suffered discrimination.

Earth to Phil.

We're talking 300 years of slavery here.

Enough.

You okay, Tony? You
look a little moosha-moosh.

Uncle Jun's trial starts today.

First Soprano family trial in 16 years.

We should go.

The guy's gonna be at the other place.

Thank you for the cookies.

And congratulations on that house.

Oh, and I like the kitchen.

-Take a strufoli.
-No.

Be seated.

Next case on the calendar:

United States of America v.
Corrado John Soprano, et al.

Any applications
before I bring in the jury?

No, Your Honor.

These telephone
charges on your last bill?

Costs me 40 bucks every
time you pick up the phone.

I can't…

Twenty-three hundred
eighty dollars last month alone.

I'm going to give you some instructions,

and explain the process
by which we will try this case.

The first order of business…

Looking out at this audience of
proud, strong, beautiful women

how far we have come
in this American journey.

Look how we've both preserved
the tradition of our ancestors,

and managed to become
new Italian-American women.

Such flair we have added to our image.

And yet America still sees us

as pizza-makers and Mama Leones.

Well, it is your job,
ladies, to spread the word.

Our grandmothers may
have been dressed in black,

but we're in Moschino and Armani.

For those who say
Italian-Americans eat smelly cheese,

and sip cold wine

tell them we're from the land of
aromatic asiago and supple Barolo.

If they say spaghetti and meatballs

you tell them orecchiette
with broccoli raab.

If they say John Gotti

you tell them Rudolph Giuliani.

A Princeton study showed
that 74 percent of Americans

associated Italian-Americans
with organized crime.

Why would they do this?

Because of the way the media depict us.

Again, it is our job to
make sure people know

the other side of
Italian-American culture

the educated,
wage-earning, law-abiding side.

Because isn't that who we truly are?

[APPLAUSE]

Thank you.

Thank you, Professor Murphy,

or should I call you
Professor Longo-Murphy?

"Longo" as you don't
call me late for dinner.

Small point. Didn't I read
about a more recent study

at Fairleigh-Dickinson that
found the opposite was true?

That the great majority of Americans
recognize these are fictional portrayals?

We're still looking at the sample
selection criteria used in that study.

Well, thanks for an excellent talk.

[APPLAUSE]

And thank you all for attending today.

Don't miss Professor Murphy's new book:

Strega: The Sorceress as
Imago Figure in Italian Literature.

And stick around for coffee and dessert

courtesy of Cocuzzo's Pastry Shop.

I'll say it. That was
totally uncalled-for.

-Father is forgetting who his friends are.
-It was outrageous. I'm shocked.

Everyone's entitled to their opinion.

How dare he? After all
you've done for this parish.

What are you gonna do?

Well, I'm gonna cut him a new one.

[SIGH]

Gab, buongiorno. Vieni qua.

Father, I don't know
what to say I'm so upset.

-Why? What's wrong?
-What's wrong?

Carmela is one of your
biggest supporters and friends.

How dare you let her suffer
humiliation and embarrassment

at the hands of an outsider?

-I don't know what you mean.
-Oh, you know exactly what I mean.

Because of her husband's
high profile in the waste industry

Carmela's the one who
bears the brunt of these insults.

But there were many
of us who were offended.

I am sorry.

This is an open forum.

You did hear me bring up that new study.

If that's your idea of a good speaker

I suggest you think about who
really keeps this parish alive

year after year.

The sight of your cities
pain the eyes of the red man.

A man in your cities
is numb to the stench…

-Go back to your reservation!
-Mussolini was Hitler's bitch!

Go back!

In the words of Chief Seattle:

"For the last red man
shall have perished,

and the memory of my tribe

shall have become a
myth among the white man."

Take your tom-toms and get out of
here, you son of a bitch of a bastard!

"These shores, these woods.

The highway will swarm with
the invisible dead of our people!

The white man will never be alone!"

This is Newark, baby,
we don't play that shit!

And that better not be Columbus!

-Take it down!
-He's going to burn

-the way our ancestors did!
-Go sit down, cupcake!

We're not taking anything down!

I'm gonna fucking hang you up there!

Hey, break it up! Break it up!

Hey! Hey! We will make arrests!

-What the fuck is this, Joey?
-They got a permit, Sil.

Everybody, come on, let's go!

-Everybody!
-I'll remember this, Joey.

-Get away from there!
-Hey!

Come on, come on. You too.

-Stay down!
-Let me go!

All right, we gotta go. We gotta go.

[GLASS SHATTERING]

Oh, shit.

Down with legislation!

What are you doing? This is
a peaceful demonstration here.

Hey! Hey! Hey!

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

Hey! Everybody, get over here!

Get him out of here.

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

[CROWD YELLING]

Orecchiette and broccoli raab,
you know, the truth is that is northern.

Armani too. And Michelangelo.

What a coward that man is.
He's always been a lily-liver.

No, he's sweet.

-What'd he say?
-He's all apologetic. I let him have it.

You did what you could.

I couldn't leave here
without saying something.

I gotta go. I'm getting
my new crown today.

-Bye-bye.
-I'll see you tomorrow.

Karen, bring Bobby and the kids
over for a cookout on Saturday.

[SIRENS AND HELICOPTER NOISES]

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

-Hello?
-It's me, Dad.

-What's up, Bobby?
-Mom tried to call you.

She wants you to pick up some steaks
and eggplants before you come home.

She can't do it?

I'm stuck in traffic. Now
I gotta go to the store?

She had to go get some
crowns or something.

Your mother's a real pain in
the you-know-what sometimes.

When she gets home,
tell her I said thanks a lot.

[PHONE RINGING]

If you can't find the
recipe, I'll ask Angie.

No, it's around here somewhere.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello?

Hey, Gab.

What? When?

Oh, my God.

Oh, no!

Oh, God, that's terrible.

Yeah. Okay.

What happened?

Karen had an accident on Pompton Avenue.

She's dead.

Oh, Carm.

[SOBBING]

I get home for dinner last night,
Gabby's sitting there devastated.

I just saw Karen at ShopRite last week.

You talking about Karen?

Great kid.

This happened to this doctor I
know. Oriental ran right into him.

What's Bobby gonna do?
He adored that woman.

What you doing getting pinched
when this family's on trial?

-I'm sorry, Ton…
-And you went down there too.

-No.
-It was my idea.

What the fuck?

We got Little Paulie in St. Barnabas.
Plus, we lost face down there.

This is something that hits home.
I can't turn the other cheek on this.

I know, but we're
running a business here.

Don't you all got something to do?

[DOOR CLOSING]

What's with you? I count on you to
be the most level-headed guy I got.

My father was a Knight of Columbus.

I'm an Italian-American, and I pay money

to the Italian Anti-Defamation
Coordination Council in Bastia.

-We're the victims here.
-Oh, you write a check too?

Ton, let's not forget.

It was a friend of ours, Joe Columbo

who founded the first Italian
anti-defamation organization.

-You were still out of line.
-You're right.

A hundred percent.

But?

Well, as your consigliere

since you ask

I think the guys and myself too,
we need your leadership on this.

All right.

All right, good. I understand you
wanna do something, but use your brain.

Believe me, me and Ralphie
are working on a few things.

This battle's gonna
be won on the PR level.

Hearts and minds.

They manipulate your image, Columbus

you manipulate theirs.

All right.

[PHONE RINGING]

-Who's calling, please?
-Good morning, assemblyman.

Hey, what's up?

Know this protest with the
Indians and Columbus Day?

Yeah, I heard about it.

We need somebody to make it go away.

Oh, boy, that's a tough
one, real hot potato.

Nobody wants to touch it.

We just want a peaceful
parade like we've had for years

with no interference.
What's wrong with that?

It's the First Amendment
and it's Native Americans.

Very sensitive stuff.

My hands are tied on this one.

-Sorry.
-Yeah, fine.

I will be attending the parade as always.

You got my support there.

Wish that I could…

The last time that you dated a
friend and colleague of your brother's

he left you flat, disappeared
into the witness protection program.

-I know.
-Now

another man who works with your brother

unable to meet your basic
needs for love and respect

involved with another woman.

Which brings me back to my childhood,

and my mother,

-and my father.
-Now we're talking.

Where I had no love and no support.

And where I was shamed
and ridiculed for being artistic.

In your relationship with these men

you have replaced your
father with your brother

as a figure of authority that
you need to prove something to.

You set up these scenarios

with these men similar to
your father and your brother

seeking your brother, i.e.,
your father's, acceptance.

-The hell with them.
-I know.

The work is to make new choices

that have nothing
to do with old patterns.

I want to, Sandy. I do.

God, give me the strength.

She will.

Your Star-Ledger interview
conflicts with Eye On New Jersey.

Del Redclay, right? I knew it.

Yeah, I saw you on
channel 21… No, don't get up.

I'm Henry Caruso, pleased to meet you.

-Now, this lovely lady.
-Maggie Donner, I'm Del's TA.

Yes. Yes, I can see that.

Well, I might as well get to the point.

[SIGHS]

I represent a group of
concerned citizens who are

very upset about this
protest you're spearheading.

No puns intended.

-Who do you represent?
-Italians

here in New Jersey.

Good people.

Family people.

And they've asked me to tell you
that it's not in your best interest

to go through with this thing.

If you've come here to intimidate me,
you don't know about Indian resolve.

Del, should I call security?

You remember this guy?

Iron Eyes Cody, he was an actor.

Son of Paleface, Sitting Bull.

Your fucking poster boy.

Part Cherokee, part Cree.

He wasn't even a fucking Indian.

Second-generation Sicilian from
Louisiana named Espera DeCorti.

-Well, I think you better leave now.
-The guy's a total fucking phony.

A total fugazy.

Even Jay Silverheels knew it.

But he kept it quiet.

Well, we're not gonna.

You keep up your bullshit

-we're gonna go wide with this thing.
-Knock yourself out.

Jesus Christ, is this true?

This is a fucking disaster!

Chill out. You didn't know about this?

-It's been on Access Hollywood, E!…
-This is a major PR boner.

It's been researched. Cody was definitely
Native American, total environmentalist.

-Are you sure about this?
-Look, Del, I'm one-eighth Italian myself.

You are? You never told me that.

My great-great something-or-other
was a pony soldier.

Well, actually, he was a
violinist attached to 7th Cavalry.

That is just one person's
opinion, Anthony.

What, football again?

He's not gonna get
hurt, he's a tough kid.

Jesus.

We're having a discussion
about Christopher Columbus.

"They would make fine servants.

With 50 men, we could subgate them."

Subjugate.

"And make them do whatever we want."

-That doesn't sound like a slave trader?
-George Washington had slaves.

-The father of our country.
-Well, what's your point?

His history teacher,
Mr. Cushman, is teaching your son

that if Columbus was alive
today, he would go on trial,

for crimes against humanity,
like Milošević in, you know, Europe.

-Your teacher said that?
-It's not just my teacher, it's the truth.

It's in my history book.

You finally read a
book and it's bullshit.

Tony.

[SIGH]

You have to walk in Columbus'
shoes to see what he went through.

People thought the world
was flat, for crying out loud.

Then he lands on an island with
savages on it. That took a lot of guts.

You remember when we went to
Florida? The heat? And those bugs?

Like it took guts to murder people.

-He was a victim of his time.
-Who cares? It's what he did.

He discovered America, is what he
did. He was a brave Italian explorer.

And in this house Christopher
Columbus is a hero. End of story.

[SOBBING]

I should've known.

I should've known you needed me.

I should've been with you.

I should've been in your place.

My love.

My sweet love.

[SOBBING]

Are you okay?

How he loved her.

It's cross-town, 68th Street.

You know what I heard one time?

Sil was on the phone. He
was talking with somebody

about how Bobby was the only one
of them who doesn't have a goomar.

They were laughing at him.

-Who was he talking to on the phone?
-I don't know.

I'll go first this time. I'll bring my
eggplant parma over to Bobby's.

Actually, tomorrow is better for me.

Ginny, hi. We were just talking
about who's gonna do what when.

I played canasta with her just last week.

[SIGH]

There he is. John, look

I'm sorry I missed Allegra's nursing
school graduation. Unforgivable.

But I made it up to her.

Stick it in your ass.

-Hey, Count Chocula…
-What the fuck, John?

Keep him away from me.

-John, what's going on?
-I don't wanna talk about it.

What's this?

I have no fucking idea.

But I got better shit to do.

You saw how it was with
them at dinner the other night.

Something's going on.

Plus, out of nowhere, Carmine's up my
ass on the Frelinghuysen Avenue bullshit.

Somebody's talking too much.

And it's costing me money.

Come on.

There's no release.

I'm surrounded by death. My
husband, my son, my friend.

-I don't know what to tell you, Ro.
-There's pieces torn out of me.

Chunks of me that are dead.

And look at me. My youth,
my looks, they're gone.

No.

That's from not taking care of yourself.

-Dwelling on all this stuff.
-It's not stuff.

Do you have any idea what it feels like?

Do you?

It's not stuff. It's death, it's pain.

I'm having a lot of
trouble dealing with this.

-I don't know.
-You don't know what?

I don't think I can do this.

I don't think I can help you.

You need a lot right now and I
don't think there's anything I can do.

You can be there for
me, you can comfort me.

What about me?

-What do I get out of it?
-There it is. Right there.

What do you get?

How about your every need
taken care of. Sexually, everything.

All your shit! It's all
about you, isn't it?

It's not all about me, but I mean

-let's be realistic.
-Let's be realistic?

What? You wanna leave me?

Yeah.

Then get the fuck out.

-It doesn't have to be like this.
-How should it be?

How the fuck should it be?

Somehow Carmine found
out we were flipping properties,

so your take's a little
less than we talked about.

He makes an issue out of Zellman?

-What's this one called, Hesh?
-This is Pie-O-My.

Just broke her maiden at
Belmont last month. A lot of speed.

-I'm buying her.
-Cool, man.

-She's beautiful, huh?
-That's right.

Don't you know somebody over there
at Deerpark Casino in Connecticut

-run by the Mohonk tribe?
-Yeah, Marty, my niece's husband.

This Columbus Day protest,
we need to make it go away.

What's wrong with freedom of speech?

You should hear my kid. He
calls Columbus a murderer.

-They wiped out my people.
-Cubans are from Spain.

Strictly speaking, they were Taino
Indians who got raped by Columbus.

That's right, Reuben.

Melanzane got Martin Luther King Day.

-I have sympathy for the red man.
-Why is that?

Jews, because of their history, have
common cause with the oppressed.

Some Indians were deliberately
given blankets tainted with smallpox.

Died like flies.

-No shit?
-Yeah, shit.

Yeah? You wanna talk
bioterrorism? Look who started it.

-Amen to that, my friend.
-That's right.

Christopher Columbus was
no better than Adolf Hitler.

Back up. Hitler?

Yeah. I'm not the only one who thinks so.

Yeah, that Indian from the protest
who was whining about the wilderness

they had him on TV and
he called Columbus Hitler.

-Because it's true, man.
-You're talking out of your ass.

Columbus and Hitler? You're
trivializing the Holocaust.

Frankly, Reuben, if you got
that kind of covert anti-Semitism

I'd like you to leave my house.

-Anti-Semitism?
-That's right.

Fuck you too, my man!

Guys, come on. Reuben, Hesh,
you guys have been friends for years.

I'll call Marty up in Connecticut.
He knows a big Mohonk.

That cocksucker.

We're not tired. I didn't
spill food because I'm tired.

Don't argue, okay? Listen to
your Aunt Grace and Aunt Mary.

Do what they say.

-Say good night to your Aunt Carmela.
-Good night, Aunt Carmela.

-It's great your family could come.
-They're leaving tomorrow.

-Somebody's sick up there.
-Dad? Dad?

[PHONE RINGING]

Dad, Sophia locked the door.

Should I get that?

He takes all my pencils.

-Baccalieri residence.
-Carmela, is that you?

-It's Corrado.
-Oh, hello.

How's my boy Bobby doing? He
knows I couldn't make it to the services.

-All right. He's upstairs with the kids.
-What a heartbreak, huh?

You know, I remember the first
time I met her like it was yesterday.

It was my birthday dinner at
Roman Gardens. I'll never forget it.

She said I looked like Pablo Picasso.

And I didn't even know
what Picasso looked like.

One day she showed me a picture
of him, and you know, she was right.

That's very touching. Let me get Bobby.

I just wanna know if he's gonna
pick me up for court tomorrow.

Maybe you should let Bobby be. Think
about his needs instead of your own.

It's not me. Please,
don't villainize me here.

Murf goes to bed early, so I wanted to
call him now if I need him to drive me.

I don't wanna disturb him when he's
asleep. He's an old man, for God's sakes.

[CAR HONKING]

Stella!

What the fuck are you doing?

We don't have to hide, baby.

I did it!

I told Ro.

-Told her about us?
-No. No, no, no.

I told her I didn't wanna be
with her anymore, and I left!

Now I can devote
myself to you completely.

Now there can be no more fear

no more guilt.

-Just sex.
-Yeah. Yeah.

-You know what I want.
-Yeah, you want it all, don't you?

Oh, yeah. You need me, slut.

I need it all, baby.

Oh, shit!

Oh, shit, tonight's my night. I gotta
bring food over to Bobby Bacala's.

You're on ziti patrol
too? Ro's got Thursdays.

Well, what should I do?

[LAUGHS]

You could do me a solid, Tony.

Next time you see Hesh, remind him

my granddaughter's bat
mitzvah present doesn't really work.

The bubble jet printer. I
don't like to keep hocking him.

He knows about it.

He said he lost the sales slip.

So, Marty, where is this guy?

There he is. What'd I say? Right on cue.

Chief!

-Where, behind the preppy guy?
-That's him.

Chief, I'd like to introduce you to my
friends, Silvio Dante, Tony Soprano.

The guy I was telling you about.

Chief Doug Smith.

Tribal chairman of the Mohonk
Indians and CEO of Mohonk Enterprises.

-An honor.
-Thanks for coming all the way here.

I had business in Manhattan anyway.

Not again.

Would you bring the gentleman
a Ketel One up, please?

So, chief, he told you about
the shit going down in Newark?

Small element, ruins
it for the rest of us.

I've got a quarter-billion-dollar casino
and a huge Italian-American customer base.

Providence, East Boston. Good people.

Our part of the world. We're
closer than Atlantic City.

This is a brand-new
facility, state of the art.

This fucking protest, they're burning
Columbus in effigy down there.

-They're gonna lay down in the parade.
-That's not gonna happen.

People like Redclay, they're out of
touch. They're in their ivory towers.

They don't understand the economic
opportunity that funds the community.

You should see the
Olympic-size swimming pool

this man put in the Deerpark
Reservation Rec Center.

Well, we all got kids.

We don't want to see our
heritage attacked, that's all.

Salute.

Well, no offense, chief, but you
don't look much like an Indian.

Frankly, I passed
most of my life as white

until I had an awakening and
discovered my Mohonk blood.

My grandmother on my father's
side, her mother was a quarter Mohonk.

This happened when the
casino bill got passed, right?

-Better late than never.
-"Mohonk" if you love Columbus.

Sorry I didn't make it last night.

My Bible group had a
potluck for the homeless,

and I was on clean-up crew, so…

Food, food, like that solves
all the world's problems.

Bobby, we've been neighbors.

I know that we don't talk much,
but if you want to, I'm here for you.

What is it?

That day

when she had the accident

I was stuck in traffic.

My son called because Karen wanted
me to pick up steaks and eggplants.

And I was mad at her for sending me.

I was tired.

I was mad at her.

But I was stuck in traffic
because of her accident.

She was up the road ahead
of me lying in twisted metal.

But I didn't know, and I
could've been with her.

I should've been there to help her.

But I was mad at her.

Oh, my sweet Karen.

My sweet girl.

Pass me the peppers.

Hello?

Oh, yeah, just a second.

Ton, it's the Indian chief.

-Doug, how are you?
-Tony, I wish I had better news.

I struck out. Redclay didn't go for it.

Ask about the Iron Eyes Cody thing.

Pretended he didn't know me.
You believe the son of a bitch?

Ask him about Cody.

-You ask about Iron Eyes Cody?
-He didn't give a shit.

It was some Internet rumor.

Most Native Americans,
they don't give a fuck.

It's like knowing
James Caan isn't Italian.

All right, well, it was nice meeting
you, and I appreciate the effort.

You gotta let me make it up to
you. Come on up, spend a day.

Sil, whoever you want. High-rollers
room, everything comped.

-Sure, that sounds good.
-Great.

What the fuck did he
say about Iron Eyes Cody?

Ralphie had it all fucked up.

It don't mean nothing anyway,
because it's like knowing

James Caan isn't Italian.

We think this guy Redclay's
fucking a graduate student.

-We hire a detective…
-I think it's over, Sil.

-Yeah, but all we gotta…
-It's over.

He had just lost his wife.

And he had so much sadness, you know?

So much love for her, such
complete and pure emotion.

I felt unworthy to even
be in his presence.

I was so moved by him.

And then I look at Ralphie.

You saw in this man the
things that you want in your life.

Truth.

-Love.
-Yes.

Somehow I have to find a way

to move away from the
darkness and toward the light.

What does this man do?

He works with my brother,
but he's not like the others.

Sandy, he's different, believe me.

Okay.

But back to Ralph.

You've got to sit him
down and level with him.

Speak the truth, Jan.

But with the compassion and respect
that you're famous for. And say goodbye.

For his sake as well as yours.

You're right.

It's not his fault.

[SOBBING]

Roll me some numbers, fearless leader!

-Coming at you.
-Yeah, six!

-It's all right.
-You had a great run, T.

You held the dice for quite a while.

Look at this operation.

Whenever I'm in these places I remember
my grandmother was part Fugahwe.

Maybe I should do something about it.

-Bullshit.
-No, no, it's true.

They were a nomadic tribe,
and they wander around

they get lost and they
go, "Where the Fugahwe?"

I see you gentlemen are having a
good time. You getting enough to eat?

Yeah.

Running out of my comps here.

Go find Marty, he's on
the floor somewhere.

Tony, can we talk a
minute? Buy you a drink?

Yeah, sure.

I wanted to give you a
check for Jason's tuition.

Okay.

-The statement's up in my bedroom.
-Oh, that's okay, I trust you.

Oh, wait, is it 5:00?

I'm here at Christopher
Columbus Park in Newark

where this afternoon
violence broke out briefly

between Native American
demonstrators and members

of a coalition of 18 various
Italian-American pride organizations.

Get out of here! This is
our day! You hear that?

He fed our people to his dogs!

My God, this is tragic.

Could be scored with Albinoni's "Adagio."

Janootski!

[DOOR CLOSING]

Janice!

This is it, hon.

This is the last of
the stuff I had at Ro's.

Finito.

Your shoes.

What?

Didn't I ask you to take your shoes
off when you came in this house?

Forgot.

-Sorry, hon.
-You forgot.

So that's just it? You fucking forgot!

Oh, fuck.

Get out! Get out!

[GASP OF PAIN]

My back, my back.

I'll kill you, you crazy bitch.

I'll kill you, you bitch.

-You crazy cunt!
-Get out!

[DOOR SLAMMING]

[RADIO CHANGING]

It's gotta be on here somewhere.

…scuffle at the Columbus
Day parade in Newark.

Among those arrested was Native
American activist Del Redclay

who called the protest
an unqualified success.

Elsewhere, a blind river-rafter
is going to get her wish

after suing for a place
in the Colorado River…

I should've been there.

I would've been fucking there.
I forgot this was a Monday.

-Maybe we ought to whack this prick.
-Who the fuck are you kidding?

-All you thought about was blackjack.
-What?

You think this day in the
country was free, don't you?

Well, it wasn't.

Chief Smith wants Frankie Valli
to come up there and play a week.

That's what this whole
fucking junket was about.

-Frankie?
-Yeah, that's right.

That's why he buttonholed me, goddamn it.

Bad blood with Frankie's manager.
So the chief wants me to call him

as payback for him
reaching out to Redclay.

-You're gonna make the fucking call.
-I ain't seen Frankie for…

Tough shit! You're
making the fucking call!

You and this fucking parade already!

I don't know what you're so hot about.

They discriminate against Italians as
a group when they disallow Columbus…

Will you fucking stop?

Group. Group.

Whatever the fuck happened to Gary
Cooper? That's what I'd like to know.

He died.

You mean because he fought
the Sioux in those Westerns?

No, fuck that.

Gary Cooper. Now there was an American.

The strong, silent type.
He did what he had to do.

He faced the Miller Gang when none
of those other assholes would help him.

Now, did he complain? Did he say:

"I come from this poor, Texas-Irish,
illiterate fucking background,

so leave me out of it because
my people got fucked over"?

T, not for nothing, but you're
getting a little confused here.

A, that was the movies.

What difference does that make?

Columbus was so long ago, he
might as well have been a movie!

Images, you said.

The point is, Gary Cooper…

The real Gary Cooper,

or anybody named Cooper,
never suffered like the Italians.

The medigan like him,
they fucked everybody else.

The Italians, the Polacks, the blacks.

All right, if he was a
medigan around nowadays

he'd be a member of some victims group.

The fundamentalist Christians,
the abused cowboys, the gays!

-He was gay, Gary Cooper?
-No! Are you listening to me?

Hey. People suffered.

Did you? Except for maybe the Feds?

My grandparents got spit on
because they were from Calabria.

Let me ask you a question. All
the good things you got in your life

did they come to you
because you're Calabrese?

I'll tell you the answer.
The answer is no.

You got a smart kid at
Lackawanna College.

You got a wife who's a piece of ass,
at least she was when you married her.

You own one of the most profitable
topless bars in North Jersey.

Did you get all this
because you're Italian?

No, you got it because you're
you. Because you're smart.

Where the fuck is our
self-esteem? I mean…

That shit doesn't come from Columbus,

or The Godfather or
Chef-fucking-Boyardee.

We gotta tiptoe around the
Indians though, don't we?

We can't call our teams the
Braves or the Tomahawks or the…

You take it up with
Frankie Valli when you talk to him.

[MUSIC CUES UP]