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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:26,627 --> 00:00:29,461 CHRISTINA WALTERS? 2 00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:32,231 GOD, I HAVEN'T HEARD THAT NAME IN AGES. 3 00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:35,000 YOU KNOW THE KIND OF WOMAN WHO CAN GET ANY GUY SHE WANTS? 4 00:00:35,002 --> 00:00:37,469 THAT'S CHRISTINA WALTERS. 5 00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:39,538 WE DATED, YOU KNOW, BRIEFLY. 6 00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:42,174 BUT, UH, SHE'S NOT THE COMMITMENT TYPE. 7 00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:45,477 SHE'S A PLAYER. SHE JUST LIKES TO HAVE FUN. 8 00:00:45,479 --> 00:00:48,814 I MET CHRISTINA AT A BAR. HOT PIECE OF ASS. 9 00:00:48,816 --> 00:00:51,483 TOTALLY HIT IT OFF. ALL NIGHT LONG WE DANCE. [ Straining ] 10 00:00:51,485 --> 00:00:54,686 I BUY HER DRINKS. AT THE END OF THE NIGHT, 11 00:00:54,688 --> 00:00:56,522 SHE JUST SPLITS. 12 00:00:56,524 --> 00:00:59,625 I LAY DOWN ALL THAT GROUNDWORK FOR NOTHING. 13 00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:02,628 SHE GAVE ME HER NUMBER. IT'S BEEN LIKE THREE DAYS. [ Dialing ] 14 00:01:02,630 --> 00:01:05,364 I SAW SWINGERS. I KNOW HOW THESE THINGS WORK. [ Line Ringing ] 15 00:01:05,366 --> 00:01:08,634 [ Computerized Voice ] HELLO, AND WELCOME TO AOL MOVIEFONE. 16 00:01:08,636 --> 00:01:12,438 I STAY UP NIGHTS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY SHE SAID SHE'D CALL AND DIDN'T. 17 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:17,643 MAYBE SHE WANTED TO CALL AND THAT'S WHY SHE SAID SHE WAS GONNA CALL, BUT WHEN SHE WAS-- 18 00:01:17,645 --> 00:01:19,311 � CHRISTINA � 19 00:01:20,848 --> 00:01:22,881 � CHRISTINA �� 20 00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:26,351 YOU KNOW, PROLONGED IMPOTENCE IS VERY COMMON AFTER A BREAKUP. 21 00:01:26,353 --> 00:01:28,954 LOTS OF MEN SUFFER FROM IT. 22 00:01:28,956 --> 00:01:31,323 THEY JUST DON'T TALK ABOUT IT, YOU KNOW. [ Chuckles ] 23 00:01:31,325 --> 00:01:33,892 NOT LIKE ME, GABBING AWAY, GAB, GAB, GAB, GAB. 24 00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:37,229 BUT EVEN STILL, BECAUSE SHE SAID SHE WAS GONNA CALL, 25 00:01:37,231 --> 00:01:39,298 SHE SHOULD HAVE CALLED TO SAY SHE WASN'T GONNA CALL. 26 00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:43,235 THEN I WOULD HAVE THANKED HER FOR CALLING TO SAY SHE WASN'T GONNA CALL. 27 00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:45,471 BUT HEY, YOU KNOW, AT LEAST I DON'T GET THAT DIZZY, 28 00:01:45,473 --> 00:01:48,173 HEAD-SPINNING NAUSEA AS MUCH AS I USED TO. 29 00:01:48,175 --> 00:01:52,077 [ Hysterical Scream, Maniacal Laughter ] 30 00:01:52,079 --> 00:01:56,048 YEAH, YOU KNOW, LIKE I SAID, I'M DOING FINE. 31 00:01:56,050 --> 00:01:59,785 I AM FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! 32 00:02:06,227 --> 00:02:09,361 [ Woman ] � THIS IS MY � � SEXUAL REVOLUTION � 33 00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:13,432 � SEXUAL REVOLUTION � � SEXUAL REVOLUTION � 34 00:02:13,434 --> 00:02:18,537 � YEAH � � SEXUAL REVOLUTION � 35 00:02:18,539 --> 00:02:22,541 � SEXUAL REVOLUTION � 36 00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:25,511 � EVERYBODY, SHAKE IT � 37 00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:27,379 CHRISTINA! VALERIE! 38 00:02:27,381 --> 00:02:30,315 SHAKE IT IF YOU GOT IT. [ Cell Phone Ringing ] 39 00:02:31,619 --> 00:02:33,452 MISS COURTNEY. 40 00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:36,588 WELL, HELLO, MISS CHRISTINA. HOW YOU DOING? WHAT YOU DOING? 41 00:02:36,590 --> 00:02:41,727 - DANCING TOO MUCH. HOW YOU DOING? - SAME THING. HOW WAS YOUR DAY? 42 00:02:41,729 --> 00:02:46,832 PRETTY GOOD. I GOT A NEW ACCOUNT DESIGNING A CAMPAIGN FOR A SPORTS LINE. 43 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:49,468 WELL, THEY GOT THE RIGHT GIRL NOW, DIDN'T THEY? 44 00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:53,105 AHH, THANK YOU. SO, WHAT'S UP? 45 00:02:53,107 --> 00:02:57,276 OH, YOU KNOW, THE USUAL. DEFENDING THE RIGHTS OF MY BROKENHEARTED CLIENTS... 46 00:02:57,278 --> 00:03:02,114 AND TRYING TO SQUEEZE EVERY SINGLE PENNY OUT OF THEIR MISERABLE, CHEATING SPOUSES. 47 00:03:02,116 --> 00:03:04,049 YOU GO GET 'EM, WOMAN. SO, LISTEN. 48 00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:06,985 I THINK I'M JUST GONNA ORDER A PIZZA AND STAY IN TONIGHT. HOW DOES THAT SOUND? 49 00:03:06,987 --> 00:03:10,389 OKAY, BUT IF WE DO THAT, YOU KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAVE TO HAPPEN, HUH? 50 00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:15,127 GIRL, I'VE BEEN SHAKING MY ASS ALL THE WAY UP THIS HILL. 51 00:03:15,129 --> 00:03:18,063 WHICH TRACK? TRACK THREE. OH, YEAH! 52 00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:21,166 COOCHIE! 53 00:03:21,168 --> 00:03:24,236 � A BEAUTIFUL THING � � SEXUAL REVOLUTION � 54 00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:27,873 � A SEXUAL REVOLUTION � � SEXUAL REVOLUTION �� 55 00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:33,645 �� [ "Cherish" ] 56 00:03:35,249 --> 00:03:38,584 [ Moans ] IS YOUR GRANNY HERE? WHAT'S GOING ON? 57 00:03:38,586 --> 00:03:42,087 IT'S JANE. SHE LOVES THIS SONG. OH. 58 00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:45,023 HOLA, CHICA. WHAT'S UP? 59 00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:48,060 HEY, JANE, WHAT'S UP? HEY, GIRL. 60 00:03:48,062 --> 00:03:50,095 � CHERISH IS THE WORD � 61 00:03:50,097 --> 00:03:53,498 HE DUMPS ME. KEVIN DUMPED ME. 62 00:03:53,500 --> 00:03:58,370 [ Both Sighing ] IT WAS JUST THREE DAYS BEFORE OUR ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY. 63 00:03:58,372 --> 00:04:01,306 OH, BABY. YOU KNOW WHAT, MAYBE HE JUST FREAKED OUT. 64 00:04:01,308 --> 00:04:05,911 HE IS GONNA CALL UP TOMORROW WHEN HE REALIZES WHAT A HUGE MISTAKE HE MADE. 65 00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:08,747 YOU KNOW, HE'S PROBABLY JUST GOING THROUGH THAT-- NO! 66 00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:12,718 HE SAYS HE'S BEEN WANTING THIS FOR SIX MONTHS. HE SAYS HE'S BEEN DYING INSIDE... 67 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:16,788 �� [ Stops ] EVER SINCE I BROUGHT OVER MY GARMENT BAG. 68 00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:18,824 - OUCH. - HONEY. 69 00:04:18,826 --> 00:04:22,461 WHAT? YOU KNOW, WE'RE ALL GUILTY OF IT. 70 00:04:22,463 --> 00:04:24,463 YOU MADE YOURSELF TOO AVAILABLE. YEAH. 71 00:04:24,465 --> 00:04:26,665 IT'S A CLASSIC MISTAKE, SWEETHEART. UH-UH. 72 00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:29,668 YEAH. NOT ACCORDING TO THIS. 73 00:04:29,670 --> 00:04:31,703 WHAT IS THIS? LOOK. "COMMANDMENT FOUR." 74 00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:34,840 "TRUE LOVE: THE TEN COMMANDMENTS." MM-HMM. 75 00:04:34,842 --> 00:04:39,344 "COMMANDMENT NUMBER FOUR: THOU SHALL BE OPEN TO LOVE'S POSSIBILITIES. 76 00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:41,813 BOUNDARIES ARE THE ENEMY OF LOVE." SWEETIE. 77 00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:46,285 LOOK IT. YOU KNOW WHAT? THIS BOOK... IS RELATIONSHIP PROPAGANDA. 78 00:04:46,287 --> 00:04:48,720 LISTEN TO ME. 79 00:04:48,722 --> 00:04:52,190 DATING IS ALL ABOUT BOUNDARIES. 80 00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:54,293 HONEY, YOU HAVE TO PROTECT YOURSELF. 81 00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:58,497 WE'VE ALL HAD OUR HEARTS STOMPED ON ONE TOO MANY TIMES BECAUSE... 82 00:04:58,499 --> 00:05:00,666 WE WENT AND SERVED IT TO THEM ON A BIG OLD PLATTER. 83 00:05:00,668 --> 00:05:03,669 A GOOD DEFENSE IS THE BEST OFFENSE. 84 00:05:03,671 --> 00:05:06,638 [ Scoffs ] I AM SO TIRED OF PLAYING GAMES. 85 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:10,208 THIS IS NOT ABOUT PLAYING GAMES. THIS IS ABOUT SELF-PRESERVATION. 86 00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:14,513 HONEY, YOU CAN'T JUST THROW YOURSELF OUT THERE ALL EXPOSED AND VULNERABLE EVERY TIME. 87 00:05:14,515 --> 00:05:18,016 THAT IS HOW YOU GET SMACKED DOWN. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? 88 00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:22,721 DON'T GO LOOKING FOR MR. RIGHT. LOOK FOR MR. RIGHT NOW. 89 00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:25,090 AND EVENTUALLY, IF HE'S WORTHY, 90 00:05:25,092 --> 00:05:30,128 THEN ONE DAY THAT "NOW" PART IS JUST GOING TO... 91 00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:33,432 DROP AWAY... NATURALLY, YOU KNOW? 92 00:05:33,434 --> 00:05:37,035 MEANWHILE, YOU'RE JUST GONNA HAVE FUN TOGETHER. 93 00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:40,605 YEAH, IT'S NOT SO SERIOUS, YOU KNOW. SHAKE IT OFF A LITTLE BIT. 94 00:05:40,607 --> 00:05:43,909 SPEAKING OF FUN, WE ARE GONNA TAKE YOU OUT. 95 00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:45,610 WHAT? OH, YES. 96 00:05:45,612 --> 00:05:48,647 WE ARE TAKING YOU OUT. YOU ARE GONNA HAVE A GOOD TIME. 97 00:05:48,649 --> 00:05:52,551 OH, NO. NO, NO, NO, NO. NO! 98 00:05:52,553 --> 00:05:57,589 - [ Together ] OSWALDO! - HELLO, CHRISTINA. COURTNEY. 99 00:05:57,591 --> 00:06:00,058 JANE. HELLO, JANE. 100 00:06:01,428 --> 00:06:03,562 WELCOME. THANK YOU. 101 00:06:04,798 --> 00:06:08,367 - [ All Shouting ] - SHUT UP! 102 00:06:08,369 --> 00:06:11,503 �� [ Hip-hop, Slow ] 103 00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:35,660 [ Laughing ] 104 00:06:40,801 --> 00:06:43,335 OH, YEAH. 105 00:06:43,337 --> 00:06:46,304 [ Laughs ] OH, MY GOD! 106 00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:48,707 [ Spanish ] [ Screams ] 107 00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:52,711 HEY, HEY. LOOK AT SHOULDER, BABY. BOUNCE IT, BABY. 108 00:06:52,713 --> 00:06:55,580 CHECK IT OUT, BABY. YEAH! ALL RIGHT. 109 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:57,983 WHAT'S YOUR NAME, BABY? 110 00:06:57,985 --> 00:06:59,751 OH, HERE WE GO! 111 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:02,487 THE CIRCLE OF LOVE, CIRCLE OF LOVE! 112 00:07:02,489 --> 00:07:04,990 MONKEY BUSINESS, BABY. MONKEY BUSINESS. 113 00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:09,995 [ Together, Singsongy ] WE'RE GONNA GO NOW. 114 00:07:09,997 --> 00:07:12,197 BYE-BYE! 115 00:07:15,002 --> 00:07:18,303 CHOP, CHOP, CHOP, CHOP, CHOPPING, CHOPPING. 116 00:07:18,305 --> 00:07:21,506 [ Both Screaming ] 117 00:07:21,508 --> 00:07:23,208 [ Laughing ] 118 00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:27,179 OH, MY GOD. IT'S LIKE SIEGFRIED AND ROY OR SOMETHING. 119 00:07:27,181 --> 00:07:29,981 MARTINIS, LADIES. OH, THANK YOU. 120 00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:33,552 COMPLIMENTS OF THE GENTLEMAN AT THE BAR. WHICH ONE? 121 00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:39,458 WHOA. THANK YOU, LEATHER COAT GUY. 122 00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:41,626 [ Together ] CHEERS. 123 00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:45,630 HMM. LEATHER COAT GUY'S LOOKING KIND OF GOOD, HUH? 124 00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:47,966 YES, HE IS. SHOTGUN! [ Chuckles ] 125 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:49,634 CHEATER. 126 00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:55,507 WHAT'S UP? 127 00:07:57,311 --> 00:08:00,011 NOTHING. WHAT'S UP WITH YOU? 128 00:08:01,248 --> 00:08:05,150 NOTHIN'. WHAT'S UP WITH YOU? 129 00:08:06,253 --> 00:08:08,854 NOTHING. WHAT'S UP WITH YOU? 130 00:08:08,856 --> 00:08:11,256 NOTHIN'. 131 00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:16,294 YOU KNOW, I AM HAVING THE BEST TIME. ARE YOU, SWEETIE? 132 00:08:16,296 --> 00:08:20,098 MY BOYFRIEND JUST DUMPED ME, I'M HERE AT THIS CLUB WHERE NO ONE WANTS TO TALK TO ME... 133 00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:23,668 AND I WANNA GO HOME. NO! 134 00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:26,538 NO, CHRISTINA, I CAN'T DO THIS. 135 00:08:26,540 --> 00:08:28,940 YES, YOU CAN. IT'S REALLY VERY EASY. 136 00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:30,876 OBSERVE. 137 00:08:32,513 --> 00:08:35,480 OW! I JUST PINCHED HIS ASS. 138 00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:38,783 I'M SORRY. HI. HI. WHAT'S YOUR NAME? 139 00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:41,620 PETER. WHY-- PETER, THIS IS MY FRIEND JANE. 140 00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:43,955 JANE WOULD LOVE TO DANCE. HEY. 141 00:08:43,957 --> 00:08:46,057 UH, JANE, I DON'T MEAN TO BE RUDE, 142 00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:48,493 BUT I HAVE SOME FRIENDS WHO ARE WAITING FOR ME. � DANCING TOGETHER � 143 00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:51,897 NICE TO MEET YOU, THOUGH. � YOU AND JANE MAGIC'S IN THE AIR �� 144 00:08:51,899 --> 00:08:55,400 OH, HE HATED ME. I SUCK. YOU DO NOT SUCK. THAT GUY WAS A DICK. 145 00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:59,471 LOOK, I'M GONNA MAKE SURE YOU HAVE FUN TONIGHT IF IT'S THE LAST THING-- 146 00:08:59,473 --> 00:09:02,507 I'M SORRY. WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME? 147 00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:04,743 [ Laughs ] [ Mock Chuckle ] YEAH. 148 00:09:04,745 --> 00:09:08,046 YOU JUST CALLED ME A DICK. I HEARD YOU. WHY AM I A DICK? 149 00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:11,283 UH, WELL, BECAUSE YOU-- I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU TREATED MY FRIEND. 150 00:09:11,285 --> 00:09:14,119 WELL, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO YOUR FRIEND. WELL-- 151 00:09:14,121 --> 00:09:16,421 - HI. - YOU BARELY GAVE HER THE TIME OF DAY. 152 00:09:16,423 --> 00:09:20,025 UH, NO. YOU TRIED TO PAWN ME OFF ON HER AND I DIDN'T GO FOR IT. THAT MAKES ME A DICK? 153 00:09:20,027 --> 00:09:24,563 PAWN YOU OFF? YOU SHOULD BE SO LUCKY TO EVEN TALK TO SOMEONE AS HOT AND SWEET AS JANE. 154 00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:28,433 - WELL, EXCUSE ME. - HEY, I WASN'T SUGGESTING THAT THE TWO OF YOU GET MARRIED. 155 00:09:28,435 --> 00:09:30,201 I JUST THOUGHT MAYBE YOU COULD GET IT ON. 156 00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:32,671 WHAT? "GET IT ON?" I WAS TRYING TO DO YOU A FAVOR. 157 00:09:32,673 --> 00:09:35,640 YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ME. WHAT IF I'M SOME PSYCHO SERIAL KILLER? 158 00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:38,877 AND WHAT IF JANE WAS THE GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS? BUT YOU'LL NEVER KNOW. 159 00:09:38,879 --> 00:09:41,046 [ Chuckles ] THAT IS THE SWEETEST THING. 160 00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:44,282 NEVER THOUGHT I'D MEET THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS BY HAVING SOMEBODY GRAB ME IN A BAR AND SAY, 161 00:09:44,284 --> 00:09:46,785 [ Imitating Tarzan ] "HEY, YOU, MAN, I HAVE GOOD WOMAN FOR YOU. 162 00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:48,853 "SHE IS VERY HOT AND SWEET. SHE IS THERE. 163 00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:51,756 JANE, YOU DANCE FOR THE MAN!" WAIT. 164 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,558 MAYBE THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM. WAIT. WHAT'S MY PROBLEM? 165 00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,995 MAYBE IF YOU DIDN'T PLAY IT SO SAFE, MR. SAFETY POO, HEY. 166 00:09:56,997 --> 00:09:59,531 YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY MEET A GIRL THAT YOU COULD HAVE FUN WITH. 167 00:09:59,533 --> 00:10:03,868 AND THIS BRILLIANT LOVE ADVICE COMES FROM SOMEONE WHO LOVES TO PLAY GAMES WITH MEN, 168 00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:07,606 ALWAYS IN CONTROL, THAT WAY SHE NEVER HAS TO GET TOO CLOSE. 169 00:10:07,608 --> 00:10:10,742 NICE MANNERS, BY THE WAY. 170 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:17,816 WHERE THE HELL DID THAT GUY-- JANE? JANE? 171 00:10:17,818 --> 00:10:19,918 WHAT'S UP WITH YOU? 172 00:10:21,588 --> 00:10:25,090 NOTHIN'. WHAT'S UP WITH YOU? 173 00:10:25,092 --> 00:10:27,359 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GRABBED HIS ASS. 174 00:10:27,361 --> 00:10:30,528 BUT HE COMES RIGHT INTO MY FACE AND HE STARTS TELLING ME ALL THIS STUPID STUFF... 175 00:10:30,530 --> 00:10:35,600 ABOUT HOW I LIKE TO PLAY GAMES AND ALWAYS BE IN CONTROL SO I NEVER GET TOO CLOSE. 176 00:10:35,602 --> 00:10:37,569 CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM? OH, NO. 177 00:10:37,571 --> 00:10:39,404 WHAT? IT'S JUST... 178 00:10:39,406 --> 00:10:42,040 I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU ACT LIKE THIS BEFORE, THAT'S ALL. 179 00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:44,542 ACT LIKE WHAT? THEY'RE FAKE. 180 00:10:44,544 --> 00:10:47,646 ALL BAH-JIGGITY ABOUT SOME GUY. 181 00:10:47,648 --> 00:10:50,015 - YOU'RE CALLING ME "BAH-JIGGITY?" - YEAH. 182 00:10:50,017 --> 00:10:53,018 - I'M REALLY SORRY. I DIDN'T MEAN TO STARE. - THAT'S COOL. 183 00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:55,754 - THAT'S WHY I GOT 'EM. - I'M NOT BAH-JIGGITY. 184 00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:58,189 - YOU ARE SO BAH-JIGGITY. - THEY LOOK REAL. 185 00:10:58,191 --> 00:11:00,792 OH, THANK YOU. YOU CAN TOUCH IT IF YOU WANT TO. 186 00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:03,662 - NO, NO, NO, NO. - TOUCH IT. SHE LIKES IT. 187 00:11:03,664 --> 00:11:06,131 IT'S FINE. GO AHEAD. FEELS REAL, HUH? 188 00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:08,633 IF I'M BAH-JIGGITY ABOUT THIS GUY PETER, 189 00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:10,635 IT'S ONLY BECAUSE YOU'RE TELLING ME I AM. 190 00:11:10,637 --> 00:11:13,171 OH, MY GOD. WHAT? 191 00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,740 YOU'VE NAMED THE PUPPY. I DID NOT. 192 00:11:15,742 --> 00:11:17,475 YOU JUST CALLED HIM PETER. I DID? 193 00:11:17,477 --> 00:11:20,078 SHELLY, YOU'VE GOT TO COME OVER AND FEEL THESE THINGS. 194 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:23,014 - I'M PSYCHIC AND I JUST KNEW THAT HIS NAME WAS PETER. - [ Shelly ] DO YOU MIND IF I? 195 00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:25,383 KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF. OKAY. 196 00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:28,286 SO SOFT. UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE! 197 00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:32,691 - OH, FUCK! - WOW. I AM SO GETTING A PAIR. 198 00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:35,827 WHAT DID I TELL YOU? THAT'S WHY CHICKS ALWAYS GO TO THE BATHROOM TOGETHER. 199 00:11:35,829 --> 00:11:40,432 CHRIS, IT'S SO OBVIOUS THAT YOU LIKE THIS GUY. WHY ARE YOU BEING SUCH A PUSSY ABOUT IT? 200 00:11:40,434 --> 00:11:43,935 WHY ARE YOU MAKING SUCH A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT? IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED, 201 00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:46,071 THERE'S PLENTY OF GUYS OUT THERE. 202 00:11:46,073 --> 00:11:49,674 - MM-HMM. - SEE YA LATER. 203 00:11:49,676 --> 00:11:51,776 [ Both Groaning ] 204 00:11:51,778 --> 00:11:55,013 WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM? WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM? 205 00:11:58,685 --> 00:12:00,819 - HI. - HI. 206 00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:05,356 - HEY, PETER. - HUH? 207 00:12:08,261 --> 00:12:11,963 ERIC, HEY. [ Eric ] BE RIGHT THERE, CHRISTINA. 208 00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:14,466 YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS. I MEAN, IT'S-- 209 00:12:14,468 --> 00:12:18,737 I KNOW, BUT I WANT TO. I SPILLED YOUR DRINK. CAN I PLEASE BUY YOU ANOTHER ONE? 210 00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:21,973 OKAY. LISTEN, UH, I WANNA APOLOGIZE NOW. 211 00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:24,576 I... SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN IMPOLITE TO YOUR FRIEND. 212 00:12:24,578 --> 00:12:29,080 AND IF I WAS, I DIDN'T MEAN TO BE. IT'S JUST MY BROTHER IS WAITING FOR ME. 213 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:32,150 I GOT NERVOUS. I DON'T KNOW. BUT I-- NOT THAT-- 214 00:12:32,152 --> 00:12:34,152 I MEAN, OTHERWISE I'D BE ALL OVER YOUR FRIEND. 215 00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:38,256 I-- I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD APOLOGIZE. I WAS RUDE. 216 00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:40,892 SO, I APOLOGIZE. NO, NO, NO. I UNDERSTAND. 217 00:12:40,894 --> 00:12:43,561 NO, YOU WERE PROTECTING YOUR FRIEND. ANYBODY WOULD HAVE DONE THAT. 218 00:12:43,563 --> 00:12:46,564 I THOUGHT THAT WAS SWEET. 219 00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:49,400 [ Peter ] EXCUSE ME. PARDON ME. 220 00:12:49,402 --> 00:12:52,504 JESUS. SO ARE WE GOOD NOW? 221 00:12:52,506 --> 00:12:54,272 YEAH. GOOD. 222 00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:56,775 WELL, I SHOULD PROBABLY GET BACK TO MY FRIENDS. 223 00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:58,643 OKAY. 224 00:12:58,645 --> 00:13:00,779 UM, THANKS FOR THE DRINK. 225 00:13:00,781 --> 00:13:02,580 CHEERS. 226 00:13:02,582 --> 00:13:05,550 CHEERS. [ Chuckles ] 227 00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:07,786 HAVE A GOOD NIGHT. YOU TOO. 228 00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:12,991 �� [ Continues ] 229 00:13:14,995 --> 00:13:19,197 EXCUSE ME. CAN YOU TAKE THIS? I JUST TOTALLY STRUCK OUT WITH THIS GUY. 230 00:13:19,199 --> 00:13:24,369 ONE MORE THING. SHOULD I BE UPSET MY EX-GIRLFRIEND HAS HER TONGUE DOWN THAT GUY'S THROAT? 231 00:13:25,539 --> 00:13:28,406 OH, MY GOD! JANE! 232 00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:31,643 - I GUESS I BLEW MY CHANCE, HUH? - YEAH, THAT COULD'VE BEEN YOU. 233 00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:34,312 YEAH, IF I WEREN'T SUCH A DICK. 234 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:36,181 A DICK? WAS I REALLY A DICK? YEAH, YEAH. 235 00:13:36,183 --> 00:13:38,383 REALLY? YOU WERE A DICK. 236 00:13:38,385 --> 00:13:43,121 WOW. MAYBE WE SHOULD START OVER AGAIN. WHY DON'T I WALK BY, YOU GRAB ME LIKE YOU DID BEFORE. 237 00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:44,956 I DIDN'T GRAB YOU. YOU TOTALLY GRABBED ME. 238 00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:47,225 I DID NOT. I PINCHED YOU. YOU GRABBED ME ON THE ASS. 239 00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:50,562 YOU GRABBED-- OKAY. I DON'T GRAB. 240 00:13:50,564 --> 00:13:52,964 PETE! PETE! DUDE! 241 00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:55,266 EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. 242 00:13:55,268 --> 00:13:57,735 DUDE, WHERE YOU BEEN? EVERYBODY'S WAITING. 243 00:13:57,737 --> 00:14:02,040 AFTER-HOURS PARTY BACK AT THE HOTEL. THESE TWO PIGS ARE GOOD TO GO. 244 00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:06,010 DID I MENTION THAT WE HAVE THE FREDDIE MERCURY SUITE? 245 00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:08,513 HEY! [ Girl ] SHE PUKED ON HIM! 246 00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:12,750 AGAIN! GOD, SHE'S LIKE A HOSE. GO HELP HER, PLEASE. 247 00:14:12,752 --> 00:14:17,422 OR NOT. ALL RIGHT, SHE'S OUT. SO, WE'RE ONE SHORT. WHO'S THIS CHICK? 248 00:14:17,424 --> 00:14:19,657 NO. NO, NO, NO, NO. OH, SHE IS HOT. BRING HER. 249 00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:22,527 - WHAT? - FUCK ME, DON'T SAY NO. 250 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:26,831 YOU HAVE SO MUCH-- OW! YOU'VE GOTTA SAY YES. LET ME TELL YOU WHY. 251 00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:30,501 YOU'RE NEVER GONNA FIND ANYONE BETTER THAN MY BROTHER. HE IS THE GREATEST. 252 00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,570 OKAY. OKAY. AND I AM SURE-- THAT HURTS ME. 253 00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:35,874 NOW, JUST-- JUST LOOK AT HIM. CHICKS FREAK ON THIS GUY. 254 00:14:35,876 --> 00:14:37,909 HE IS-- COME ON NOW. HE IS THE SHIT. 255 00:14:37,911 --> 00:14:41,679 - AND THAT'S WHY HE'S IN MY WEDDING ON SATURDAY. - ROG. ROG, NO. 256 00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:44,549 YES. JUST TRYING TO HELP OUT. NO. 257 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:46,251 YEAH, YEAH, YEAH-- BYE. 258 00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:48,853 WHOA! SORRY, SORRY, SORRY, SORRY. 259 00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:52,690 HEY, LISTEN, LADIES. BIG PARTY, FOUR SEASONS, ROOM 402. YOU'RE INVITED. 260 00:14:52,692 --> 00:14:54,726 LET'S GO, BABY. COME ON. YOU'RE OUT. I'M LEAVING. 261 00:14:54,728 --> 00:14:57,428 I'M LEAVING. ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME? THAT'S MY BROTHER. 262 00:14:57,430 --> 00:15:01,766 - OH, HE'S SPECIAL. - CAREFUL. THAT'S PUKE. IT'S PUKE. DON'T TOUCH ME. 263 00:15:01,768 --> 00:15:04,102 WOW. SO, WHEN'S THE WEDDING? 264 00:15:04,104 --> 00:15:07,205 UH, SATURDAY AFTERNOON UP IN SOMERSET. 265 00:15:07,207 --> 00:15:10,041 - THAT'S WHERE WE LIVE. - THAT'S NICE. 266 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:12,710 PETER, IT'S LOOKING LIKE NOW. OKAY, OKAY. 267 00:15:12,712 --> 00:15:14,812 YOU'RE PINCHING MY ARM SKIN. 268 00:15:14,814 --> 00:15:17,482 OKAY, I'D BETTER GO. 269 00:15:17,484 --> 00:15:20,985 FOR REAL THIS TIME. WELL, IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU. 270 00:15:20,987 --> 00:15:24,656 - IT WAS VERY NICE TO MEET YOU. I HAD A GREAT TIME. - YEAH? ME TOO. 271 00:15:24,658 --> 00:15:28,126 - YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY COME BY THE PARTY IF YOU WANT TO. - REALLY? 272 00:15:28,128 --> 00:15:31,629 - DEFINITELY. IF YOU WANT TO. - OKAY, I'LL ASK MY FRIENDS. MAYBE WE'LL STOP BY. 273 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:35,900 I REALLY HOPE I SEE YOU. BUT IN CASE I DON'T SEE YOU, HAVE A NICE LIFE. 274 00:15:35,902 --> 00:15:38,569 YOU TOO. 275 00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:41,673 �� [ Fades ] 276 00:15:45,879 --> 00:15:47,745 [ Answering Machine Beeps ] 277 00:15:47,747 --> 00:15:51,816 HEY, CHRIS, IT'S COURT. SO I'M AT THE PARTY WITH LEATHER COAT GUY. 278 00:15:51,818 --> 00:15:55,019 AND I WAS JUST CHECKING IN TO SEE IF YOU WERE LISTENING TO YOUR MESSAGES. 279 00:15:55,021 --> 00:15:57,522 'CAUSE IF YOU ARE LISTENING TO YOUR MESSAGES, 280 00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:59,757 THAT MEANS YOU WERE TOO CHICKENSHIT TO HOOK UP WITH PETER. 281 00:15:59,759 --> 00:16:02,126 WHICH THEREFORE MEANS YOU ARE A LOSER. [ Groans ] 282 00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:04,762 YOU ARE A LOSER. A LOS-- 283 00:16:04,764 --> 00:16:07,565 [ Machine Beeps ] THANKS, COURT. 284 00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:10,335 I'M A BIG LOSER. [ Imitating Drum Machine ] 285 00:16:10,337 --> 00:16:13,204 � WHAT'S UP, YOU BITCHES AND HOS AND LOSERS � 286 00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:15,673 � LOSERS ARE-- �� [ Machine Beeps ] 287 00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:23,681 TOO LATE NOW. 288 00:16:32,525 --> 00:16:34,993 HE WAS KIND OF CUTE. 289 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:40,565 FUNNY. 290 00:16:43,136 --> 00:16:45,536 REALLY FUNNY. 291 00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:51,009 CUTE BOY. 292 00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,782 [ Panting ] 293 00:17:04,391 --> 00:17:06,958 [ Moaning ] 294 00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:09,694 [ Yelps ] 295 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:12,597 [ Chuckling ] 296 00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:14,999 OH, MY GOD. YOU'RE SO GOOD AT THAT. 297 00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:18,636 IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'D LIKE TO DO THAT EVERY HOUR ON THE HOUR FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES. 298 00:17:18,638 --> 00:17:21,539 OF COURSE. GO RIGHT AHEAD. THANK YOU. 299 00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:24,776 DON'T WORRY ABOUT RETURNING THE FAVOR. MEN DON'T REALLY LIKE ORAL SEX. 300 00:17:24,778 --> 00:17:27,578 YEAH, RIGHT. I'M SERIOUS! 301 00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:30,181 IT'S JUST A BAD RUMOR THAT WAS STARTED SOMETIME IN THE '50s. 302 00:17:30,183 --> 00:17:33,484 I HAD NO IDEA. I NEED TO TELL ALL MY FRIENDS. 303 00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:37,822 PLEASE, DO. SOMEONE NEEDS TO PUT AN END TO THIS MADNESS. 304 00:17:42,495 --> 00:17:46,697 OH, GOD. I'M SO GLAD I CAME BACK TO THE HOTEL ROOM. [ Chuckles ] 305 00:17:46,699 --> 00:17:48,699 GOD. ME TOO. 306 00:17:49,969 --> 00:17:52,170 I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE YOU AGAIN. 307 00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:54,105 [ Knocking ] 308 00:17:54,107 --> 00:17:56,541 ROOM SERVICE. 309 00:17:56,543 --> 00:17:58,509 OH, RIGHT ON TIME. 310 00:17:58,511 --> 00:18:02,613 [ Christina ] ICE CREAM! ONLY THE BEST FOR OUR V.I.P.s. 311 00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:05,716 I HAD THEM REMOVE ALL THE CALORIES FOR YOU. 312 00:18:05,718 --> 00:18:09,120 OH, YOU ARE GOOD. 313 00:18:09,122 --> 00:18:11,255 ALL RIGHT! 314 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:14,892 I KNOW I SAID I WANTED TO DO IT TO YOU EVERY HOUR ON THE HOUR, BUT I REALLY CAN'T WAIT. 315 00:18:14,894 --> 00:18:17,261 CAN I DO IT AGAIN NOW? 316 00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:19,764 [ Sighs ] OKAY. 317 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:23,101 WOW. 318 00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:28,639 [ Chuckles ] 319 00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:31,642 [ Moans ] 320 00:19:02,775 --> 00:19:04,575 [ Line Ringing ] 321 00:19:04,577 --> 00:19:10,615 SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA, PLEASE, FOR, UM, FOUR SEASONS HOTEL. THANKS. 322 00:19:10,617 --> 00:19:12,550 THANK YOU. 323 00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:15,720 [ Line Ringing ] GREAT DREAM. 324 00:19:15,722 --> 00:19:18,189 [ Man Speaking Indistinctly ] YES, HI. 325 00:19:18,191 --> 00:19:22,593 UM, DO YOU HAVE A FREDDIE MERCURY SUITE? 326 00:19:22,595 --> 00:19:26,297 OH, GOOD. CAN I HAVE IT? THANKS. 327 00:19:28,768 --> 00:19:31,536 REALLY? ALREADY? 328 00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:35,806 OKAY, HAVE A GREAT DAY. THANKS. BYE. 329 00:19:38,611 --> 00:19:42,813 WELL, WHAT AM I EVEN CALLING FOR? 330 00:19:42,815 --> 00:19:44,949 [ Ringing ] 331 00:19:47,654 --> 00:19:49,353 HELLO? 332 00:19:49,355 --> 00:19:52,156 HEY, COURT. YEAH. 333 00:19:52,158 --> 00:19:55,293 �� [ Marching Drums ] 334 00:19:59,465 --> 00:20:01,666 [ Inaudible Dialogue ] 335 00:20:07,307 --> 00:20:11,342 HEY. HEY. STOP TALKING SHIT ABOUT ME, ALL RIGHT? 336 00:20:11,344 --> 00:20:14,545 WELL, WHERE YOU BEEN? SORRY I'M LATE, YOU GUYS. I DON'T EVEN WANNA TALK ABOUT IT. 337 00:20:14,547 --> 00:20:17,448 YOU READY? I'M STARVING. OKAY. 338 00:20:17,450 --> 00:20:19,383 YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M JUST GONNA MEET YOU GUYS IN THERE. 339 00:20:19,385 --> 00:20:23,254 - I HAVE TO DROP SOMETHING OFF AT THE DRY CLEANERS. - CAN IT WAIT? PLEASE? 340 00:20:23,256 --> 00:20:27,491 - I'M SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW. - ISN'T THAT COURTNEY'S DRESS THAT YOU BORROWED LAST NIGHT? 341 00:20:27,493 --> 00:20:30,628 - YEAH. - WHY ARE YOU BRINGING IT IN? 342 00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:33,231 DID-- DID YOU GET SOMETHING ON IT? YEAH? 343 00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:36,767 NO. I'M JUST TRYING TO BE A GOOD GIRLFRIEND-- 344 00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:41,038 I'M REALLY SORRY. 345 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:43,608 YOU SLUT. GUILTY. IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS? 346 00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:46,177 I WILL TAKE IT TO THE DRY CLEANERS AND IT WILL BE GONE. 347 00:20:46,179 --> 00:20:49,580 THAT'S A LOT. HE WAS HOLDIN' A LOT. 348 00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:53,150 [ All Talking Indistinctly ] 349 00:20:53,152 --> 00:20:57,154 I'M SCARED ENOUGH TO GO IN THERE. WHAT AM I GONNA SAY? 350 00:20:57,156 --> 00:21:00,291 MR. MARTIN, CAN YOU HELP ME WITH MY JIZZ? 351 00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:05,396 YOU KNOW WHAT? 352 00:21:05,398 --> 00:21:07,932 YOU GUYS... SUCK. 353 00:21:07,934 --> 00:21:09,767 NO, OBVIOUSLY, YOU SUCK. YOU. 354 00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:12,803 YOU SUCK. REALLY, WOW. I'M PROUD. 355 00:21:14,707 --> 00:21:18,009 [ Men Chuckling ] NO SPANKY WANKY. 356 00:21:18,011 --> 00:21:20,311 NO SPANKY WANKY. [ Groans ] 357 00:21:35,128 --> 00:21:37,595 [ Bell On Door Ringing ] 358 00:21:43,403 --> 00:21:45,970 HI, JANE. HI, MR. MARTIN. 359 00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:49,707 - HOW'S YOUR MOTHER? - GREAT. OH, GOD, SHE'S GOOD. EVERYONE'S GOOD. THANK YOU. 360 00:21:49,709 --> 00:21:52,843 - YOUR GRANDMOTHER? - EVERYONE'S GREAT. 361 00:21:52,845 --> 00:21:56,013 THAT'S FINE. THAT'S FINE. WHAT YOU GOT FOR ME TODAY? 362 00:21:56,015 --> 00:22:00,384 OH, JUST A DRESS, BUT I'LL BE BACK FOR IT IN A FEW DAYS. SO NO HURRY. 363 00:22:00,386 --> 00:22:03,354 - ANY STAINS? - NO. 364 00:22:03,356 --> 00:22:05,990 - WHAT'S THIS? - WHAT? 365 00:22:05,992 --> 00:22:09,694 - THIS. COME HERE. - A STAIN? 366 00:22:09,696 --> 00:22:12,363 THIS IS GONNA BE A TOUGH ONE. 367 00:22:12,365 --> 00:22:14,498 [ Speaking Yiddish ] 368 00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:19,937 OH, WOW, I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE THAT. I MUST'VE SPILLED SOME SODA ON ME LAST NIGHT. 369 00:22:19,939 --> 00:22:24,642 NO, NO, THIS IS NOT SODA. THINK, JANE. THINK! 370 00:22:24,644 --> 00:22:28,679 IF I KNOW WHAT IT IS, IT'S EASIER FOR ME TO REMOVE. 371 00:22:28,681 --> 00:22:31,716 - HUH? - [ Woman ] COME ON. 372 00:22:31,718 --> 00:22:34,685 AH, THE FIELD TRIP. COME IN, CHILDREN. COME IN. 373 00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:37,988 COME IN. YES, YES, COME IN. FUCK! 374 00:22:37,990 --> 00:22:41,292 GOOD AFTERNOON, MRS. FRANKLIN. HI, MR. MARTIN. 375 00:22:41,294 --> 00:22:44,528 OKAY, NOW ON TODAY'S FIELD TRIP, 376 00:22:44,530 --> 00:22:48,132 WE ARE GOING TO LEARN ABOUT CLEANLINESS. 377 00:22:48,134 --> 00:22:52,169 [ Muttering ] JANE? 378 00:22:52,171 --> 00:22:53,771 HEY. JANE BURNS! 379 00:22:53,773 --> 00:22:56,841 OH, SWEETHEART, I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU SINCE I TAUGHT YOU... 380 00:22:56,843 --> 00:22:59,744 IN THIRD GRADE! 381 00:22:59,746 --> 00:23:02,713 - [ Moans ] - [ Chuckling ] 382 00:23:02,715 --> 00:23:07,618 -TOP OF THE MORNING, MR. MARTIN. -HELLO, FATHER FLYNN. 383 00:23:07,620 --> 00:23:10,721 [ Gasps ] AS I LIVE AND BREATHE, ISN'T IT? 384 00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:14,125 IT IS LITTLE MARY JANE BURNS! 385 00:23:14,127 --> 00:23:17,962 WHAT A COINCIDENCE. I'M HAVING SUPPER WITH YOUR PARENTS TONIGHT. 386 00:23:17,964 --> 00:23:21,599 WHAT A STAIN YOU GOT THERE, LITTLE JANIE. 387 00:23:21,601 --> 00:23:23,401 SO, HOW WAS IT? WAS IT FUN? 388 00:23:23,403 --> 00:23:27,138 OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T TELL YOU THIS. 389 00:23:27,140 --> 00:23:30,808 APPARENTLY, ONE OF THE GUYS WHO WAS AT THE PARTY, LIKE, FLIPPED OUT. 390 00:23:30,810 --> 00:23:35,112 WAS OUT ON THE BALCONY AND HE WAS SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS, 391 00:23:35,114 --> 00:23:41,218 "CHRISTINA! HAS ANYONE SEEN MY LITTLE CHRISTINA?" 392 00:23:41,220 --> 00:23:44,655 AND THEN HE JUMPS OFF THE BALCONY AND HE DIES BECAUSE YOU'RE A PUSSY. 393 00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:46,690 WHY DIDN'T YOU GO? I DON'T KNOW. 394 00:23:46,692 --> 00:23:50,027 I WAS GOING TO. I WAS. I WAS GOING TO AND THEN I WASN'T. 395 00:23:50,029 --> 00:23:53,798 THEN I DON'T KNOW. I CALLED HIM AT THE HOTEL THIS MORNING. WAIT. HOLD ON. 396 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:57,902 REWIND FOR ONE SECOND. YOU CALLED HIM AT THE HOTEL? 397 00:23:57,904 --> 00:24:01,138 - WELL, WHAT DID HE SAY? - NOTHING. HE SAID NOTHING. 398 00:24:01,140 --> 00:24:03,140 OKAY? NOTHING. 399 00:24:03,142 --> 00:24:04,909 WHY? HE CHECKED OUT ALREADY. 400 00:24:04,911 --> 00:24:07,244 OKAY, LET'S JUST SUM THIS UP REAL QUICKLY. 401 00:24:07,246 --> 00:24:09,680 IN THE BATHROOM WE HATE HIM, 402 00:24:09,682 --> 00:24:11,682 YET WE CALL HIM BY NAME. 403 00:24:11,684 --> 00:24:13,818 THEN WE THROW BEER ON HIM. 404 00:24:13,820 --> 00:24:17,488 THEN WE LAUGH AND WE FLIRT AND WE DANCED WITH HIM. IT WASN'T BEER. 405 00:24:17,490 --> 00:24:19,924 THEN WE CASUALLY CALL HIM AT THE HOTEL. 406 00:24:19,926 --> 00:24:23,060 THEN WE OBSESS ABOUT THE CASUAL CALL. OBSESS? 407 00:24:23,062 --> 00:24:26,430 I'M NOT OBSESSING. I'M NOT OBSESSING. I'M JUST WONDERING, 408 00:24:26,432 --> 00:24:28,833 COULD ALL THIS ERRATIC BEHAVIOR POSSIBLY BE... 409 00:24:28,835 --> 00:24:31,368 BECAUSE THIS GUY DID GET UNDER YOUR SKIN? NO. 410 00:24:31,370 --> 00:24:33,537 THAT YOU MIGHT REALLY LIKE HIM? NO. 411 00:24:33,539 --> 00:24:36,907 YOU REGRET NOT GOING TO THIS PARTY BECAUSE YOU WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT MIGHT HAVE HAPPENED? 412 00:24:36,909 --> 00:24:39,243 NO, OKAY? I DON'T REGRET IT. 413 00:24:39,245 --> 00:24:43,414 IF I HAD ANY REGRETS, IT WOULD BE THIS CONVERSATION NOW, HAVING IT WITH YOU. 414 00:24:43,416 --> 00:24:46,617 - CAN WE JUST DROP IT? - OKAY, I'M SORRY I BROUGHT IT UP. 415 00:24:46,619 --> 00:24:48,752 I WON'T MENTION IT AGAIN. 416 00:24:50,389 --> 00:24:54,825 - YOU KNOW, EVEN IF I DID REGRET NOT GOING TO THE PARTY, - [ Groans ] 417 00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:57,661 IT'S NOT LIKE I CAN DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT NOW. 418 00:24:57,663 --> 00:25:02,399 SO, I MEAN, SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO... LET THESE THINGS GO, RIGHT? 419 00:25:02,401 --> 00:25:05,469 EXACTLY. ALTHOUGH, 420 00:25:05,471 --> 00:25:07,438 IF THERE WAS REGRETS, YOU KNOW, 421 00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:13,444 I SUPPOSE THERE'S ALWAYS JUST SOMETHING YOU COULD DO ABOUT IT, RIGHT? 422 00:25:13,446 --> 00:25:23,554 LIKE YOU COULD SHOW UP AT HIS BROTHER'S WEDDING, 'CAUSE IT IS HIS BROTHER. 423 00:25:23,556 --> 00:25:36,667 LIKE YOU COULD SHOW UP AT HIS BROTHER'S WEDDING, 'CAUSE IT IS HIS BROTHER. 424 00:25:36,669 --> 00:25:38,536 COME ON! 425 00:25:38,538 --> 00:25:41,005 HOW MUCH TIME WE GOT? WE'VE GOT LIKE THREE HOURS BEFORE THE REHEARSAL. 426 00:25:41,007 --> 00:25:42,840 HIT THE BALL. 427 00:25:42,842 --> 00:25:44,842 OH, GOOD SHOT. 428 00:25:44,844 --> 00:25:49,513 [ Peter ] FORE! I'M GONNA SHOVE THAT CLUB UP YOUR ASS, YOU DICK LICKER! 429 00:25:49,515 --> 00:25:51,815 WHAT, ARE YOU UP BY LIKE TWO NOW? 430 00:25:51,817 --> 00:25:55,386 I GUESS. WELL, LISTEN. IT DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS. 431 00:25:55,388 --> 00:25:57,388 TO THE MARRIAGE. TO THE MARRIAGE. 432 00:25:57,390 --> 00:26:00,257 TO-TO-TO THE BRIDE. TO THE BRIDE. 433 00:26:00,259 --> 00:26:03,527 - YEAH. - TO 50 YEARS WITH THE SAME WOMAN. 434 00:26:04,931 --> 00:26:07,031 THAT'S REALLY DEPRESSING. 435 00:26:07,033 --> 00:26:09,099 SORRY. 436 00:26:09,101 --> 00:26:11,735 SAGGY TITS. 437 00:26:11,737 --> 00:26:15,272 BE ABLE TO USE THEM AS A BELT BY THEN. [ Clears Throat ] 438 00:26:15,274 --> 00:26:19,310 OR JUST TUCK 'EM IN HER SOCKS, YOU KNOW. OKAY. 439 00:26:19,312 --> 00:26:23,280 GOD, THIS MARRIAGE IS-IS SUCH A BIG LEAP, YOU KNOW. 440 00:26:23,282 --> 00:26:26,116 - IT'S REALLY INTENSE, PETE. - BUT IF IT'S THE RIGHT WOMAN-- 441 00:26:26,118 --> 00:26:29,353 YEAH, I GUESS. 442 00:26:31,190 --> 00:26:33,891 GET UP A LITTLE. YES. FORE! 443 00:26:33,893 --> 00:26:37,328 YOU MOTHERFUCKERS! STOP BOTHERING ME! 444 00:26:37,330 --> 00:26:39,563 YOU'RE DRIVING RIGHT INTO 'EM. 445 00:26:39,565 --> 00:26:42,666 HEY, WHAT ABOUT JOHN? I HEAR HE'S STILL AWOL FROM THAT BACHELOR PARTY. 446 00:26:42,668 --> 00:26:45,302 HE SHOWED UP LAST NIGHT. HE'S MISSING AN EYEBROW... 447 00:26:45,304 --> 00:26:47,371 AND HE'S GOT A TATTOO ON HIS ASS THAT SAYS "BITCH." 448 00:26:47,373 --> 00:26:49,740 FORE! I AM NOT AN ANIMAL! 449 00:26:49,742 --> 00:26:54,545 VERY GOOD. OH, HEY, SPEAKING OF BITCHES. 450 00:26:54,547 --> 00:26:58,015 WHAT WAS GOING ON WITH YOU THAT NIGHT AT THE CLUB WITH THAT HOTTIE? 451 00:26:58,017 --> 00:27:00,584 - NOTHIN'. - I MEAN, JESUS! 452 00:27:00,586 --> 00:27:03,420 I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT. 453 00:27:03,422 --> 00:27:06,256 I THINK YOU LIKED HER A LITTLE BIT. NO, I DIDN'T. 454 00:27:06,258 --> 00:27:08,325 YEAH, YOU DID. DON'T LIE TO ME. HEY, HEY, HEY. 455 00:27:08,327 --> 00:27:11,428 DON'T LIE-- DON'T LIE TO DARTH, LUKE. 456 00:27:11,430 --> 00:27:14,765 [ Imitating Lightsabers ] 457 00:27:16,702 --> 00:27:19,203 I CAN SEE IT IN YOUR EYES YOU LIKED HER. 458 00:27:19,205 --> 00:27:21,672 [ Imitates Lightsaber Retracting ] 459 00:27:22,908 --> 00:27:25,009 NOTHIN' I CAN DO ABOUT IT NOW. 460 00:27:25,011 --> 00:27:28,779 SHOULD HAVE POKED HER IN THE WHISKERS WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE. 461 00:27:28,781 --> 00:27:31,482 WHAT'S THAT, GRAMPS? 462 00:27:31,484 --> 00:27:33,984 I MET THIS HOT YOUNG DISH... 463 00:27:33,986 --> 00:27:37,721 AT THE WORLD'S FAIR BACK IN 1940. 464 00:27:37,723 --> 00:27:42,526 EVERY MOMENT WITH HER WAS LIKE A SLICE OF HEAVEN. [ Whistles ] 465 00:27:42,528 --> 00:27:44,928 I BET YOU REALLY MISS GRANDMA, HUH? 466 00:27:46,298 --> 00:27:48,298 AH, FUCK GRANDMA. 467 00:27:48,300 --> 00:27:50,567 - HUH? - IT'S PEARL I'M TALKIN' ABOUT. 468 00:27:50,569 --> 00:27:53,504 SHE WAS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. 469 00:27:53,506 --> 00:27:56,840 DON'T EVER LET THESE MOMENTS PASS YOU BY. 470 00:28:00,913 --> 00:28:03,681 FUCKIN' GRANDMA! 471 00:28:03,683 --> 00:28:06,316 WOULD YOU BE NICE? 472 00:28:06,318 --> 00:28:10,187 [ Chuckles ] COME ON, SEVEN-SIX. 473 00:28:13,459 --> 00:28:16,460 [ Together ] FORE! [ Balls Hitting Cart ] 474 00:28:20,900 --> 00:28:24,401 [ Man ] � THE LIGHTS ARE OFF AGAIN � 475 00:28:24,403 --> 00:28:28,305 � SHE TOOK ME BY SURPRISE � 476 00:28:28,307 --> 00:28:31,742 � SHE'S SO SENSITIVE � 477 00:28:31,744 --> 00:28:34,845 � IT JUST SHOULD HAPPEN SOMETIMES �� 478 00:28:34,847 --> 00:28:36,780 YOU SUCK! 479 00:28:36,782 --> 00:28:39,783 DAMN IT. BUT YOU SMELL SO MINTY FRESH NOW. 480 00:28:39,785 --> 00:28:43,887 WHAT DO YOU WANT? I NEED TO BORROW YOUR BLACK GUCCI BAG. 481 00:28:43,889 --> 00:28:45,923 GOD-- HERE. 482 00:28:45,925 --> 00:28:48,792 IT'S IN THE LIVING ROOM. OKAY, WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN THE LIVING ROOM. 483 00:28:48,794 --> 00:28:51,562 AND I DON'T FEEL LIKE LOOKING FOR IT, SO LET'S GO. NO. 484 00:28:51,564 --> 00:28:54,264 WILL YOU HELP ME FIND IT, PLEASE? COME ON, PLEASE? 485 00:28:54,266 --> 00:28:59,703 WELL, SINCE I'M UP NOW AND YOU DECIDED TO TORTURE ME, I'LL GO AND GET IT! 486 00:28:59,705 --> 00:29:01,572 [ Chuckles ] 487 00:29:01,574 --> 00:29:03,974 [ Screams ] OH, I'M SORRY. OH, MY GOD. EXCUSE ME. 488 00:29:03,976 --> 00:29:08,645 UM, COULD YOU GUYS TELL ME WHERE THE BATHROOM IS? IT'S BEHIND YOU. 489 00:29:08,647 --> 00:29:11,115 OVER HERE? OOPS. 490 00:29:11,117 --> 00:29:14,752 UH-- [ Stammering ] 491 00:29:14,754 --> 00:29:17,020 WELL, THANKS. 492 00:29:17,022 --> 00:29:19,790 OH, MY COCK. COCK. 493 00:29:19,792 --> 00:29:23,227 OH, MY COCK. OH, MY COCK. OH, MY COCK. 494 00:29:23,229 --> 00:29:25,195 OH, MY COCK. 495 00:29:25,197 --> 00:29:28,465 [ Laughing ] 496 00:29:28,467 --> 00:29:31,034 [ Moans ] DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY ADVIL? 497 00:29:31,036 --> 00:29:33,504 OH! [ Chuckling ] 498 00:29:33,506 --> 00:29:37,908 JANIE. HE IS SO CUTE. 499 00:29:37,910 --> 00:29:41,011 [ Whispering ] SO STUPID. 500 00:29:41,013 --> 00:29:44,548 OH, BABE. CAN I GET THAT PURSE NOW, PLEASE? 501 00:29:44,550 --> 00:29:46,917 YES, YOU CAN GET THE PURSE. OKAY. NO, NOW. 502 00:29:46,919 --> 00:29:49,019 HERE'S THE PURSE. 503 00:29:49,021 --> 00:29:50,921 AH, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 504 00:29:55,060 --> 00:29:58,162 - WHERE ARE YOU GOING? - YOU AND I ARE GOING TO A WEDDING. 505 00:29:58,164 --> 00:30:00,430 WHAT WEDDING? WHO'S GETTING MARRIED? 506 00:30:00,432 --> 00:30:03,200 WE ARE GOING TO PETER'S BROTHER'S WEDDING. 507 00:30:03,202 --> 00:30:04,835 PETER? NOW LISTEN. 508 00:30:04,837 --> 00:30:08,505 THIS SOMERSET PLACE WHERE THEY LIVE IS SOME SMALL TOWN... 509 00:30:08,507 --> 00:30:12,342 ABOUT THREE HOURS NORTH, SO WE HAVE TO GET ON THE ROAD NOW IF WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT. 510 00:30:12,344 --> 00:30:14,645 - P-PETER-- - WHAT? 511 00:30:14,647 --> 00:30:17,948 PETER? I'M NOT GOING TO PETER'S BROTHER'S WEDDING. 512 00:30:17,950 --> 00:30:20,818 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? YESTERDAY YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO GO. 513 00:30:20,820 --> 00:30:23,453 SO I WENT AND, YOU KNOW-- COURTNEY. 514 00:30:23,455 --> 00:30:26,490 - I WAS JOKING. - OH, NO, YOU WEREN'T. 515 00:30:26,492 --> 00:30:28,692 UH, YES, I WAS. 516 00:30:28,694 --> 00:30:33,063 FIFTY PERCENT OF WHAT PEOPLE SAY WHEN THEY'RE JOKING IS TRUE. 517 00:30:33,065 --> 00:30:37,234 WHICH MEANS THAT YOU DO WANNA GO TO THIS WEDDING, BUT YOU'RE TOO AFRAID TO ADMIT IT. 518 00:30:37,236 --> 00:30:41,205 SO BY MAKING SOME SORT OF JOKE ABOUT IT, YOU GET TO SAY WHAT YOU REALLY WANT... 519 00:30:41,207 --> 00:30:43,240 WITHOUT BEING VULNERABLE. 520 00:30:43,242 --> 00:30:45,609 RIGHT? MAYBE. 521 00:30:45,611 --> 00:30:49,279 OKAY, GOOD. THE WEDDING STARTS AT 5:00. I REFUSE TO BE LATE. 522 00:30:49,281 --> 00:30:53,851 [ Squealing ] I WANT YOU TO PUT SOME CLOTHES ON NOW. THANK YOU. 523 00:30:53,853 --> 00:30:55,919 THAT WAS A NICE ONE. THANKS. 524 00:30:55,921 --> 00:30:58,922 [ Man ] � THERE SHE GOES AGAIN SLIPPING AND SLIDING � 525 00:30:58,924 --> 00:31:03,093 � DUCKING AND DIVING THERE SHE GOES AGAIN � 526 00:31:03,095 --> 00:31:06,263 � TRYING ALL THIS NEW STUFF TRYING TO BE FLY � 527 00:31:06,265 --> 00:31:09,499 � THERE SHE GOES AGAIN SLIPPING AND SLIDING �� 528 00:31:09,501 --> 00:31:12,369 WATCH THE ROAD, COURTNEY! I GOT IT. I AM WATCHING THE ROAD. 529 00:31:12,371 --> 00:31:15,272 THAT'S IT. ONCE WE GET OFF THE 140, 530 00:31:15,274 --> 00:31:19,343 - UH-HUH. - WE'LL TAKE THE 95, GET OFF ON THE SOMERSET EXIT. 531 00:31:19,345 --> 00:31:24,114 ALL RIGHT. THEN WE'LL JUST DRIVE AROUND AND WE CAN FIND THE CHURCH NO PROBLEM. TA-DA! 532 00:31:24,116 --> 00:31:26,049 [ Sniffing ] 533 00:31:27,887 --> 00:31:30,387 EW! WHAT IS THAT? 534 00:31:30,389 --> 00:31:32,756 - WHAT IS WHAT? - YOU DON'T SMELL THAT? 535 00:31:32,758 --> 00:31:35,492 - SMELL WHAT? I DON'T SMELL ANYTHING. - OH, JESUS! 536 00:31:35,494 --> 00:31:38,896 - YOU'RE USED TO IT. THAT'S WHAT'S REALLY SCARY. - I DON'T SMELL ANYTHING. 537 00:31:38,898 --> 00:31:42,199 IT SMELLS LIKE MOLDY ASS IS WHAT IT SMELLS LIKE IN HERE. 538 00:31:42,201 --> 00:31:45,836 WAIT A MINUTE. COME TO THINK OF IT, I DID LEAVE SOME ASS IN THE BACK. 539 00:31:45,838 --> 00:31:50,774 - YOU DID. - ABOUT A WEEK AGO, I DID. IT MUST BE THE ASS. NO, NO. 540 00:31:50,776 --> 00:31:52,876 SIT DOWN, PLEASE. JESUS! [ Screams ] 541 00:31:52,878 --> 00:31:55,913 - I'M SORRY. [ Chuckling ] - YOU'RE GONNA KILL-- 542 00:31:55,915 --> 00:31:58,482 OW! 543 00:31:58,484 --> 00:32:00,751 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - JESUS, COURTNEY. 544 00:32:00,753 --> 00:32:03,353 - WHAT IS ALL THIS-- - NO, NO, NO, STOP. COME ON, PLEASE. LOOK, LOOK. 545 00:32:03,355 --> 00:32:06,723 JUST-- JUST DON'T BE THROWING OUT ANYTHING I MIGHT NEED, OKAY? 546 00:32:06,725 --> 00:32:10,861 WHERE IS IT COMING FROM, COURTNEY? WHERE? I CAN STILL SMELL IT. 547 00:32:10,863 --> 00:32:13,563 MAYBE IT'S YOU. 548 00:32:13,565 --> 00:32:16,433 DID SOMETHING CRAWL UP YOUR POONANI? HEY. 549 00:32:16,435 --> 00:32:21,138 LISTEN, I HAVE NEVER EVER HAD ANY COMPLAINTS IN THE POONANI ODOR DEPARTMENT. 550 00:32:21,140 --> 00:32:23,473 YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT? NEITHER HAVE I, OKAY? 551 00:32:23,475 --> 00:32:26,510 HIGH FIVE ON THE CLEAN POONANI. BITCH. 552 00:32:26,512 --> 00:32:29,513 - OH. EW. - WHAT? 553 00:32:29,515 --> 00:32:32,549 - EW, EW, EW. WHAT IS THIS? - WHAT IS WHAT? 554 00:32:32,551 --> 00:32:37,254 - WHAT IS THIS? - OH! JESUS! I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW LONG IT'S BEEN IN HERE. 555 00:32:37,256 --> 00:32:40,023 WHAT IS IN HERE? [ Screaming ] 556 00:32:43,295 --> 00:32:45,262 NO! 557 00:32:45,264 --> 00:32:48,432 THAT IS NOT OKAY! IT ISN'T OKAY! 558 00:32:48,434 --> 00:32:53,437 YOU ARE A DISGUSTING, NASTY PIG. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? THERE WAS MAGGOTS ON THAT-- 559 00:32:53,439 --> 00:32:55,572 [ Both Screaming ] 560 00:33:00,312 --> 00:33:04,047 EXCUSE ME. I'VE GOT MAGGOT JUICE ALL OVER ME. THERE IT IS. 561 00:33:04,049 --> 00:33:06,483 OH, PLEASE. 562 00:33:06,485 --> 00:33:09,753 LADIES ROOM. [ Knob Not Turning ] 563 00:33:09,755 --> 00:33:12,222 [ Woman ] SOMEONE'S IN HERE. SORRY. 564 00:33:12,224 --> 00:33:14,825 [ Groaning ] IT MIGHT BE A WHILE. HOW LONG? 565 00:33:14,827 --> 00:33:20,263 LET ME PUT IT TO YOU THIS WAY. I HAD LAMB CURRY LAST NIGHT, AND I'M SHITTIN' OUT A BUICK. 566 00:33:20,265 --> 00:33:22,232 [ Grunting ] EW. 567 00:33:22,234 --> 00:33:24,835 WAS IT ABSOLUTELY VITAL FOR HER TO TELL US THAT? 568 00:33:28,073 --> 00:33:29,740 [ Both ] HELLO? 569 00:33:29,742 --> 00:33:32,309 [ Christina ] HELLO? HELLO? 570 00:33:32,311 --> 00:33:34,878 IS IT ALL CLEAR? 571 00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:37,581 OH, GOD! THIS IS DISGUSTING. 572 00:33:37,583 --> 00:33:40,450 I FEEL LIKE I HAVE MAGGOTS ALL OVER ME. 573 00:33:40,452 --> 00:33:45,455 OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. DON'T MOVE. DON'T MOVE. [ Screaming ] 574 00:33:45,457 --> 00:33:48,091 OH, STOP IT! [ Laughs ] 575 00:33:48,093 --> 00:33:50,627 I'M GONNA PEE IN MY PANTS. 576 00:33:50,629 --> 00:33:52,496 ALL RIGHT, I'LL JUST USE THE URINAL. 577 00:33:52,498 --> 00:33:55,732 YOU WANNA HEAR SOME POETRY? 578 00:33:55,734 --> 00:33:59,870 "THERE ONCE WAS A MAN FROM BANDOO WHO FELL ASLEEP IN A CANOE. 579 00:33:59,872 --> 00:34:02,506 "HE DREAMED OF VENUS AND PLAYED WITH HIS PENIS... 580 00:34:02,508 --> 00:34:06,243 AND WOKE UP WITH A HANDFUL OF... GOO." [ Chuckles ] 581 00:34:06,245 --> 00:34:08,845 WAIT! DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH. DUDE, I GOTTA AIM. 582 00:34:08,847 --> 00:34:11,448 OH, GOD DARN IT. I THINK I PEED ON MYSELF. 583 00:34:11,450 --> 00:34:15,185 HMM. "FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD?" 584 00:34:15,187 --> 00:34:16,653 GOD! 585 00:34:16,655 --> 00:34:19,523 I'M FOLLOWING THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD. 586 00:34:19,525 --> 00:34:21,525 FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD. 587 00:34:21,527 --> 00:34:23,894 � LA, LA, LA, LA �� [ Gasps ] OH! 588 00:34:23,896 --> 00:34:27,697 BUFFY! YOU LOOK LIKE MY OLD DOGGY BUFFY. 589 00:34:27,699 --> 00:34:32,702 - HELLO, GIRL. I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN-- - OH, MY GOD! IT'S ON MY HANDS! 590 00:34:32,704 --> 00:34:36,573 THERE'S A GOOD GIRL. WHAT YOU GOT, LITTLE GIRL? COME ON. 591 00:34:36,575 --> 00:34:38,842 WHAT YOU GOT? WHAT'S IN YOUR MOUTH? 592 00:34:38,844 --> 00:34:42,145 - DAMN IT! - WHAT YOU GOT IN THERE? 593 00:34:42,147 --> 00:34:44,081 - WHAT'S IN THERE? WHAT'S IN YOUR MOUTH? - CRAP! 594 00:34:44,083 --> 00:34:47,150 - WHAT'S IN THERE? - [ Man ] SURPRISE! 595 00:34:47,152 --> 00:34:50,187 [ Screams ] 596 00:34:53,092 --> 00:34:55,725 OH, CHRISTINA! 597 00:34:55,727 --> 00:34:58,495 [ Shouting Indistinctly ] 598 00:34:58,497 --> 00:35:03,767 GODDAMN IT. HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A GLORY HOLE IS? 599 00:35:03,769 --> 00:35:06,203 WELL, UNLIKE MY WHORE FRIEND COURTNEY ROCKLIFFE, 600 00:35:06,205 --> 00:35:10,107 I DON'T USUALLY SPEND MUCH TIME IN MEN'S PUBLIC BATHROOMS, OKAY? 601 00:35:10,109 --> 00:35:15,011 GODDAMN, THAT IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. 602 00:35:15,013 --> 00:35:17,914 I MEAN, I FLEW ACROSS THAT ROOM. 603 00:35:17,916 --> 00:35:20,250 AND YOU GOT FUCKED IN THE EYE. 604 00:35:20,252 --> 00:35:24,387 I'M GLAD YOU FIND IT SO FUCKING AMUSING, OKAY? I REALLY DO. 605 00:35:24,389 --> 00:35:26,890 COULD YOU PLEASE HAVE SOME COMPASSION? I DO. I DO. 606 00:35:26,892 --> 00:35:30,360 BECAUSE I COULD GO BLIND, OKAY? NO, YOU COULD NOT. 607 00:35:30,362 --> 00:35:33,997 YES, I COULD. OW. ALL RIGHT, LET ME LOOK AT IT, OKAY? 608 00:35:33,999 --> 00:35:36,900 I MEAN, A PENIS IN MY EYE. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. 609 00:35:36,902 --> 00:35:39,536 LET ME SEE. LET ME SEE. SHH. 610 00:35:39,538 --> 00:35:42,105 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 611 00:35:42,107 --> 00:35:46,309 HOW IS IT? IS IT OKAY? YEAH, IT'S OKAY. 612 00:35:46,311 --> 00:35:48,678 BUT I THINK YOU'RE PREGNANT. 613 00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:51,781 WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP IT ALREADY? ALL RIGHT. 614 00:35:53,785 --> 00:35:56,953 [ Jane ] NOW I WANT YOU TO REDRESS THE MANNEQUINS AND CHECK THE SOCK INVENTORY. 615 00:35:56,955 --> 00:36:00,023 COME ON, JANE. IT'S SATURDAY AND NOBODY'S HERE. AND MR. MOONEY-- 616 00:36:00,025 --> 00:36:04,794 MR. MOONEY IS OFF SAILING WITH HIS BOY TOY WHICH LEAVES ME IN CHARGE OF THE STORE, SO SHOO. 617 00:36:04,796 --> 00:36:07,264 SOMEBODY NEEDS TO GET SOME. 618 00:36:07,266 --> 00:36:10,033 [ Door Opens, Closes ] 619 00:36:13,872 --> 00:36:17,507 � LA, LA-LA, LA-LA LA-LA �� 620 00:36:17,509 --> 00:36:19,709 OOH, THERE'S MY DIRTY GIRL. 621 00:36:19,711 --> 00:36:23,079 AAH! NO! NO! NO! 622 00:36:23,081 --> 00:36:25,248 IT'S ME, BABY! IT'S ME! IT'S ME! 623 00:36:26,585 --> 00:36:28,385 WHY ARE YOU DRESSED LIKE THAT? 624 00:36:28,387 --> 00:36:31,254 IT'S MY JOB. I WORK AT A CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL. 625 00:36:31,256 --> 00:36:33,190 OH, HI. HI. 626 00:36:35,861 --> 00:36:38,094 YOU LOOK SO CUTE. 627 00:36:39,698 --> 00:36:42,832 I'M HORNY. ME TOO. 628 00:36:48,140 --> 00:36:51,341 -YOU'RE GONNA LAUGH AT THIS ONE. -WHAT? 629 00:36:51,343 --> 00:36:53,777 YOU KNOW HOW I SAID I HAD TO DO, UH, LAUNDRY TODAY? 630 00:36:53,779 --> 00:36:57,514 IT'S 'CAUSE I RAN OUT OF CLEAN UNDERWEAR, HONEY. I'VE ONLY GOT THE SKANKY ONES LEFT. 631 00:36:57,516 --> 00:37:00,517 TELL ME ABOUT IT, DUDE. �� [ Radio: "Escape: Pina Colada Song" ] 632 00:37:00,519 --> 00:37:03,720 OH, MY GOD. YOU ARE SO UNBELIEVABLE. 633 00:37:06,959 --> 00:37:09,759 NO WAY. IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS? 634 00:37:09,761 --> 00:37:13,029 SPRING BREAK, 1994, BABY. 635 00:37:13,031 --> 00:37:14,898 TURN IT UP. OH, MY GOD. 636 00:37:14,900 --> 00:37:18,501 �� [ Volume Increases ] � LIKE A WORN-OUT RECORDING � 637 00:37:18,503 --> 00:37:21,771 � OF A FAVORITE SONG � 638 00:37:21,773 --> 00:37:25,041 � SO WHILE SHE LAY THERE SLEEPING � 639 00:37:25,043 --> 00:37:29,012 � I READ THE PAPER IN BED � 640 00:37:29,014 --> 00:37:32,215 � AND IN THE PERSONAL COLUMNS � 641 00:37:32,217 --> 00:37:35,018 � THERE WAS THIS LETTER I READ � 642 00:37:35,020 --> 00:37:38,288 � IF YOU LIKE PINA COLADAS � 643 00:37:38,290 --> 00:37:41,358 � AND GETTING CAUGHT IN THE RAIN � 644 00:37:42,961 --> 00:37:45,996 � IF YOU'RE NOT INTO YOGA � 645 00:37:45,998 --> 00:37:48,798 � IF YOU HAVE HALF A BRAIN �� 646 00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:50,967 - OH, MY GOD. BRAIN. - JANE! 647 00:37:50,969 --> 00:37:53,937 YOU AND I ARE SO AWESOME TOGETHER. 648 00:37:53,939 --> 00:37:56,006 WE'RE LIKE TWO PEAS IN A POD. 649 00:37:56,008 --> 00:37:58,308 WE'RE LIKE OIL AND VINEGAR. SHUT UP. 650 00:37:58,310 --> 00:38:01,544 OKAY. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M FUCKING A PURPLE ELEPHANT. 651 00:38:01,546 --> 00:38:05,815 WHAT DO YOU MEAN, SHE'S NOT HERE? WE HAVE CUSTOMERS, MISSY. 652 00:38:05,817 --> 00:38:08,451 I'M SORRY, MR. MOONEY. I'LL GO CHECK UPSTAIRS. 653 00:38:08,453 --> 00:38:11,921 GOD, I'M GONE FOR ONE DAY, THE PLACE TURNS INTO INDONESIA. 654 00:38:13,859 --> 00:38:16,893 - OH, JANE. OH, JANE. - JANE? 655 00:38:16,895 --> 00:38:18,928 JANIE WANIE. JANIE WANIE! JANE? 656 00:38:18,930 --> 00:38:21,865 - [ Grunts ] - OH, MY GOD. ARE YOU OKAY? 657 00:38:21,867 --> 00:38:24,100 - YES, I'M FINE. - WHAT IS GOING ON? 658 00:38:24,102 --> 00:38:26,970 NOTHING. I'M JUST A LITTLE FRANTIC. 659 00:38:26,972 --> 00:38:30,340 I HAVE A MILLION THINGS TO DO TODAY. AND I'M DIZZY. I'M SO DIZZY. 660 00:38:30,342 --> 00:38:33,410 WELL, MR. MOONEY IS DOWNSTAIRS AND HE IS P-I-S-E-D. 661 00:38:33,412 --> 00:38:36,346 "PISED?" 662 00:38:46,358 --> 00:38:49,726 - WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? - I WAS UPSTAIRS TAKING INVENTORY. 663 00:38:49,728 --> 00:38:52,062 YEAH, MY AUNT FANNY. 664 00:38:52,064 --> 00:38:54,397 - EW. - [ Phone Ringing ] 665 00:38:54,399 --> 00:38:56,933 GALLINI'S. [ Courtney, Enthusiastically ] HELLO. IS JANE THERE? 666 00:38:56,935 --> 00:38:59,869 YES, SHE IS. HAVE A LOVELY DAY. 667 00:39:01,340 --> 00:39:03,406 HELLO? 668 00:39:03,408 --> 00:39:06,042 [ Christina, Courtney Screaming Over Speakerphone ] JANIE! JANIE! 669 00:39:06,044 --> 00:39:09,079 SORRY, GUYS. I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW. I'M REALLY BUSY. 670 00:39:09,081 --> 00:39:11,281 [ Together ] WE WERE JUST WONDERING-- 671 00:39:11,283 --> 00:39:16,519 � DO YOU LIKE PINA COLADAS AND GETTING CAUGHT IN THE RAIN �� 672 00:39:16,521 --> 00:39:18,922 - [ Grunts ] - SHIT. 673 00:39:18,924 --> 00:39:22,092 �� [ Radio: Rock ] 674 00:39:38,210 --> 00:39:40,210 OH, SHIT. SHIT. WHAT? 675 00:39:40,212 --> 00:39:42,379 I DROPPED THE-THE THINGY TO MY LIP GLOSS. 676 00:39:42,381 --> 00:39:44,881 COULD YOU GET IT FOR ME, SWEETIE? I'LL GET IT. 677 00:39:47,953 --> 00:39:51,154 IT'S TOO FAR OVER. IT'S TOO FAR OVER. I'LL GET IT. 678 00:39:51,156 --> 00:39:55,291 HOLD ONTO IT. KEEP STEERING. I'LL KEEP GOING. 679 00:39:57,129 --> 00:39:59,662 - YEAH, IT'S RIGHT, I BELIEVE-- - HMM? 680 00:39:59,664 --> 00:40:02,899 HOO! 681 00:40:07,773 --> 00:40:09,773 OH, YEAH. 682 00:40:09,775 --> 00:40:14,444 - YEAH, BABY! - OH, YES. 683 00:40:14,446 --> 00:40:17,247 YES! [ Moaning ] 684 00:40:17,249 --> 00:40:20,717 - OH, YEAH, RIGHT THERE. - NO, THAT'S NOT IT. 685 00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:23,987 OH, YOU LIKE THAT, DIRTY GIRL? 686 00:40:23,989 --> 00:40:28,291 WHOO! YES! LET ME HAVE SOME OF THAT! 687 00:40:28,293 --> 00:40:31,661 - OH, YES, DON'T STOP. - I'M NOT GONNA STOP. 688 00:40:31,663 --> 00:40:34,030 [ Moaning ] 689 00:40:37,736 --> 00:40:39,736 [ Howling ] 690 00:40:39,738 --> 00:40:42,472 - [ Moans ] - [ Laughing ] 691 00:40:42,474 --> 00:40:45,475 - YEAH! - YEAH. 692 00:40:45,477 --> 00:40:48,244 - [ Moans ] - [ Screams ] 693 00:40:48,246 --> 00:40:50,013 YES! 694 00:40:57,355 --> 00:40:58,822 SHIT. 695 00:40:58,824 --> 00:41:02,792 OKAY, I FOUND IT. JESUS, I ALMOST GOT SMOTHERED DOWN THERE. 696 00:41:02,794 --> 00:41:04,828 SHIT. ARE YOU OKAY? 697 00:41:04,830 --> 00:41:07,363 HUH? YOU GOOD? 698 00:41:07,365 --> 00:41:10,433 YEAH, NO, I'M GOOD. I'M GOOD. NEVER BETTER. NEVER BETTER. 699 00:41:10,435 --> 00:41:14,370 LET'S GET ON THE SAME PAGE ABOUT WHAT WE'RE GONNA SAY ONCE WE GET TO THE WEDDING. 700 00:41:14,372 --> 00:41:16,372 RIGHT, RIGHT. GAME PLAN. 701 00:41:16,374 --> 00:41:19,175 WALK UP TO HIM AND BE LIKE, "PETER, IS THAT YOU? 702 00:41:19,177 --> 00:41:22,011 "OH, MY GOD. MY FRIEND COURTNEY, THAT HOT BABE OVER THERE, 703 00:41:22,013 --> 00:41:25,381 SHE AND I WENT TO COLLEGE WITH THE BRIDE." IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. 704 00:41:25,383 --> 00:41:27,884 DO YOU BELIEVE THAT? NO, I CAN BELIEVE THAT. 705 00:41:27,886 --> 00:41:31,321 [ Together ] IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. FREAKY! 706 00:41:31,323 --> 00:41:34,657 [ Man ] � BUT LOVE IS IN THE AIR � 707 00:41:34,659 --> 00:41:38,995 � OH, WHAT A PERFECT DAY TO FLY � 708 00:41:38,997 --> 00:41:42,565 � NOTHING COULD COMPARE � 709 00:41:42,567 --> 00:41:47,070 � WHAT A WASTE TO GO AND WAVE GOOD-BYE � 710 00:41:47,072 --> 00:41:50,507 � LOVE IS IN THE AIR � 711 00:41:50,509 --> 00:41:55,011 � WHAT A PERFECT DAY TO FLY � [ Giggles ] 712 00:41:55,013 --> 00:41:58,515 � NOTHING COULD COMPARE � 713 00:41:58,517 --> 00:42:01,985 � WHAT A WASTE TO GO AND WAVE GOOD-BYE �� 714 00:42:01,987 --> 00:42:04,954 [ Together ] AFTERNOON. OKAY, GO. 715 00:42:04,956 --> 00:42:08,992 WOW, WOW, WOW, WOW. WOW! OH, WOW. 716 00:42:08,994 --> 00:42:13,029 MISS VERA'S HAS PLENTY TO OFFER US, DOESN'T SHE? YES, PLENTY OF CRAP. 717 00:42:13,031 --> 00:42:15,031 IT'S FABULOUS. WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS. 718 00:42:15,033 --> 00:42:17,233 OKAY, LET'S GO. ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO. 719 00:42:17,235 --> 00:42:19,302 WELCOME TO MY STORE. CAN I HELP YOU? 720 00:42:19,304 --> 00:42:21,771 NO, WE WERE JUST BROWSING. WE'RE OKAY. THANKS. 721 00:42:21,773 --> 00:42:23,940 THANK YOU SO MUCH. THANK YOU. 722 00:42:23,942 --> 00:42:26,175 BYE. YOU DON'T LIKE MY STORE, DO YOU? 723 00:42:26,177 --> 00:42:28,711 NO, NO, THAT'S NOT IT AT ALL. OH, NO, NO. 724 00:42:28,713 --> 00:42:33,216 - IT'S REALLY A LOVELY STORE. WE'RE LOOKING FOR SOMETHING-- - A LITTLE BIT MORE SPECIFIC. 725 00:42:33,218 --> 00:42:36,953 THE NEXT DRESS STORE IS 20 MILES FROM HERE. 726 00:42:36,955 --> 00:42:39,689 TWENTY MILES AWAY? OH, SHIT. 727 00:42:39,691 --> 00:42:43,293 - WE'RE GONNA MISS THE WEDDING. PERFECT. - JUDY WEBB'S WEDDING? 728 00:42:43,295 --> 00:42:46,763 I KNOW ALL ABOUT IT. I DRESSED HALF THE GUESTS. 729 00:42:46,765 --> 00:42:51,467 YOU KNOW, WHEN I WAS 22, MY "BREASTUSES" WERE, LIKE, 730 00:42:51,469 --> 00:42:55,805 RIGHT ABOUT THERE, NICE AND PERKY. 731 00:42:55,807 --> 00:42:58,908 GRAVITY HAS TAKEN THEM TO THERE. 732 00:42:58,910 --> 00:43:02,645 IT'S, LIKE, 22... 28. 733 00:43:02,647 --> 00:43:04,714 TWENTY-TWO. TWENTY-EIGHT. 734 00:43:04,716 --> 00:43:08,084 TWENTY-TWO... TWENTY-EIGHT. [ Courtney ] BUY SOME NEW ONES. 735 00:43:08,086 --> 00:43:11,654 OKAY, WAIT, BUT WAIT. THIS IS-- J-- WAIT. NO, NO, NO, NO. LOOK IT. 736 00:43:11,656 --> 00:43:16,726 WHAT IS THIS? WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS THAT? NO, NO, NO. BUT WHAT IS THAT? 737 00:43:16,728 --> 00:43:20,196 THAT, AGAIN, IS... GRAVITY. HELLO. HI. HOW ARE YOU? 738 00:43:20,198 --> 00:43:24,734 KNOCK, KNOCK. ARE YOU DECENT? [ Courtney ] YEAH. YES, YES, YES, YES. 739 00:43:24,736 --> 00:43:27,403 THANK YOU. YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE THIS. IT'S OUR LATEST LINE. 740 00:43:27,405 --> 00:43:31,040 OH, WOW. IF YOU NEED OTHER SIZES, JUST HOLLER. 741 00:43:31,042 --> 00:43:33,943 OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU, VERA. 742 00:43:33,945 --> 00:43:36,145 WOW. EXCELLENT. THANK YOU. 743 00:43:36,147 --> 00:43:39,616 OH, MY, MY, MY, MY. JESUS. 744 00:43:39,618 --> 00:43:42,018 LOOK. THAT'S NICE. 745 00:43:42,020 --> 00:43:43,886 WAIT A MINUTE. 746 00:43:43,888 --> 00:43:49,192 DO WE HAVE TIME FOR A MOVIE MONTAGE? WELL, YOU KNOW-- 747 00:43:49,194 --> 00:43:52,195 � SHAKE IT, SHAKE IT � 748 00:43:52,197 --> 00:43:56,132 � SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING YEAH, YEAH � 749 00:43:56,134 --> 00:43:59,369 � SHOW 'EM HOW WE DO IT, NOW � 750 00:43:59,371 --> 00:44:04,340 � SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING YEAH, YEAH � 751 00:44:04,342 --> 00:44:08,444 � SHOW 'EM HOW WE DO IT, NOW SHOW 'EM HOW WE DO IT, NOW � 752 00:44:08,446 --> 00:44:11,714 � LET'S SHOW THE WORLD WE CAN DANCE � 753 00:44:11,716 --> 00:44:15,551 � BAD ENOUGH TO STRUT MY STUFF � 754 00:44:15,553 --> 00:44:19,122 � THE MUSIC GIVES US A CHANCE � 755 00:44:19,124 --> 00:44:22,725 � WE DO MORE OUT ON THE FLOOR � 756 00:44:22,727 --> 00:44:26,729 � GROOVIN' LOOSE OR HEART TO HEART � 757 00:44:26,731 --> 00:44:29,132 � WE PUT IN MOTION EVERY SINGLE PART � 758 00:44:29,134 --> 00:44:33,703 � FUNKY SOUNDS WALL TO WALL � 759 00:44:33,705 --> 00:44:36,906 � WE'RE BUMPIN' BOOTIES HAVIN' US A BALL, Y'ALL � 760 00:44:36,908 --> 00:44:42,345 � SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING YEAH, YEAH � 761 00:44:42,347 --> 00:44:45,381 � SHOW 'EM HOW WE DO IT, NOW �� 762 00:44:48,953 --> 00:44:51,754 THERE YOU GO. [ Both ] OHH. 763 00:44:51,756 --> 00:44:54,424 - THANK YOU SO MUCH. - BYE. - YOU BOTH LOOK SENSATIONAL. 764 00:44:54,426 --> 00:44:58,294 THANKS TO YOUR STYLING, VERA. THANK YOU. THANK YOU TOO. 765 00:44:58,296 --> 00:45:01,898 WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE ON OUR MAILING LIST? SURE. 766 00:45:01,900 --> 00:45:04,934 SURE. RIGHT HERE? SURE. 767 00:45:08,406 --> 00:45:13,009 - THERE. JUST SEND IT THERE. - OH, THAT'S SWEET. 768 00:45:13,011 --> 00:45:17,480 MM. IT SURE IS. THANK YOU. BYE. 769 00:45:17,482 --> 00:45:21,050 WE'VE GOTTA GO. YOU OKAY? OH, SHIT! OH, MY GOD. I CAN'T WALK IN THIS THING. 770 00:45:21,052 --> 00:45:24,220 IT'S PAINFUL, LIKE BONDAGE. LITTLE STEPS, LITTLE STEPS. 771 00:45:24,222 --> 00:45:27,423 WE DON'T HAVE A LOT OF TIME. 772 00:45:28,359 --> 00:45:31,894 OH, MY GOD! OH! 773 00:45:31,896 --> 00:45:34,964 OH, MY GOD! THESE... 774 00:45:34,966 --> 00:45:37,567 ARE THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES. ARE THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES. 775 00:45:40,238 --> 00:45:42,939 THIS IS NOT DISCREET, OKAY? NO, IT ISN'T. 776 00:45:42,941 --> 00:45:47,777 WE ARE NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO WALK INTO A WEDDING-- COME ON. IT'S VERY LA TOYA. 777 00:45:47,779 --> 00:45:51,614 I MEAN, REALLY, LOOK AT ALL THIS-- 778 00:45:51,616 --> 00:45:55,351 I MAY AS WELL STRAP A SIGN ON MY ASS THAT SAYS "STALKER." 779 00:45:55,353 --> 00:45:59,822 OKAY? I AM NOT GOING THERE WEARING THIS OUTFIT. 780 00:45:59,824 --> 00:46:02,658 SO CAN WE PLEASE JUST GO? YES. LET'S GO. LET'S GO HOME. 781 00:46:02,660 --> 00:46:06,729 REALLY? YEAH. I MEAN, WE'VE DRIVEN FOR THREE AND A HALF HOURS... 782 00:46:06,731 --> 00:46:09,932 AND EVERYTHING, BUT, NO, LET'S GO. 783 00:46:09,934 --> 00:46:13,035 PLEASE. PLEASE. I'M SERIOUS. LET'S GO. REALLY. LET'S GO. 784 00:46:13,037 --> 00:46:17,340 - DON'T "REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY" ME RIGHT NOW, OKAY? - I'M NOT. 785 00:46:17,342 --> 00:46:23,012 -YOU ARE. YOU'RE SO GOOD AT IT, YOU DON'T KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT. -NO, I-- MAYBE A LITTLE BIT. 786 00:46:23,014 --> 00:46:25,982 COURT, THIS IS CRAZY, OKAY? THIS IS REALLY CRAZY. I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW. 787 00:46:25,984 --> 00:46:30,920 WHAT THE HELL WERE WE THINKING? I JUST WISH THERE WAS SOME SORT OF SIGN FROM GOD... 788 00:46:30,922 --> 00:46:33,389 THAT YOU AND THIS PETER DONAHUE GUY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE TOGETHER. 789 00:46:33,391 --> 00:46:36,425 DONAHUE? HOW DO YOU KNOW HIS LAST NAME IS DONAHUE? 790 00:46:36,427 --> 00:46:38,694 BECAUSE YOU'RE SITTING ON HIS FACE. 791 00:46:41,966 --> 00:46:45,635 - OH, MY GOD, IT'S HIM! HE'S SO CUTE. - YEAH. I KNOW. I KNOW. 792 00:46:45,637 --> 00:46:47,870 CUTE? HE'S ADORABLE! I KNOW. 793 00:46:47,872 --> 00:46:50,706 AND LOOK AT THIS: "EVERYTHING HE TOUCHES TURNS TO SOLD." 794 00:46:50,708 --> 00:46:54,544 - AND HE'S FUNNY! HE'S FUNNY, TOO, SEE? - I KNOW. 795 00:46:54,546 --> 00:46:57,680 [ Bell Tolling ] �� [ Organ ] 796 00:46:57,682 --> 00:46:59,549 CHURCH BELLS? 797 00:47:09,861 --> 00:47:12,662 [ Talking, Indistinct ] 798 00:47:12,664 --> 00:47:15,498 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 799 00:47:23,107 --> 00:47:26,142 ALL RIGHT. WHAT DO YOU THINK-- BRIDE OR GROOM'S SIDE? 800 00:47:26,144 --> 00:47:30,346 I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM, I THINK. DID YOU MISPLACE YOUR BLADDER? 801 00:47:30,348 --> 00:47:33,149 WHAT IS GOING ON HERE? I'M WEARING THE TIGHTEST SKIRT EVER, OKAY? 802 00:47:33,151 --> 00:47:36,052 FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, GO TO THE BATHROOM. THANK YOU. 803 00:47:36,054 --> 00:47:39,121 HI. COULD YOU TELL ME WHERE THE RESTROOM IS? IT'S RIGHT OUTSIDE. 804 00:47:39,123 --> 00:47:41,490 OUTSIDE. OKAY. GOD! 805 00:47:47,665 --> 00:47:51,033 OH, GOD. [ Panting ] 806 00:47:51,035 --> 00:47:53,836 HELLO? HELL-OO? 807 00:47:53,838 --> 00:47:58,541 I GOTTA PEE, PEE, PEE, PEE. OHH! OH, GOD! I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY! 808 00:47:58,543 --> 00:48:02,812 I CAN'T BREATHE. REALLY? OKAY. JUST BREATHE. 809 00:48:02,814 --> 00:48:05,948 STAY CALM. YOU'RE GONNA BE OKAY. ARE YOU OKAY? [ Quavering ] 810 00:48:05,950 --> 00:48:09,252 OKAY, UH, YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE. YOU'RE GONNA BE OKAY. WATER. 811 00:48:09,254 --> 00:48:13,055 [ Groans, Whimpers ] OKAY. 812 00:48:13,057 --> 00:48:16,392 - THANK YOU. - THERE YOU GO. I'M JUST GONNA LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR A SECOND. 813 00:48:16,394 --> 00:48:19,128 OKAY? [ Knocking ] 814 00:48:19,130 --> 00:48:23,466 [ Man ] JUDY? IN A MINUTE, DAD! [ Gasping ] 815 00:48:25,003 --> 00:48:27,470 OKAY, OKAY. 816 00:48:27,472 --> 00:48:31,407 I DON'T WANNA GO IN THE DEEP END. I DON'T WANNA GO IN THE DEEP END! 817 00:48:31,409 --> 00:48:34,143 UH-- [ Crying ] 818 00:48:34,145 --> 00:48:38,047 FLOWERS! HERE. 819 00:48:38,049 --> 00:48:40,917 I LOOK LIKE A MAGAZINE BRIDE. NO, YOU DON'T. 820 00:48:40,919 --> 00:48:44,654 YOU LOOK REALLY BEAUTIFUL. YOU'RE THE PERFECT BRIDE. 821 00:48:44,656 --> 00:48:47,890 WHY DON'T I FEEL GOOD? 822 00:48:47,892 --> 00:48:51,394 WELL, I'M SURE THAT YOU'RE JUST REALLY NERVOUS. IT'S A BIG DAY, RIGHT? 823 00:48:51,396 --> 00:48:56,632 IT'S WHAT EVERY GIRL DREAMS OF, BUT HOW DO YOU KNOW IT'S REAL? 824 00:48:56,634 --> 00:49:00,903 I DON'T KNOW. I CAN'T ANSWER THAT FOR YOU, REALLY, 825 00:49:00,905 --> 00:49:05,708 BUT I'M SURE THE TWO OF YOU ARE GONNA BE REALLY HAPPY TOGETHER. 826 00:49:05,710 --> 00:49:10,313 AND IF YOU'RE NOT, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN ALWAYS JUST GET DIVORCED. 827 00:49:10,315 --> 00:49:13,382 YEAH! YEAH! SEE? IT'LL BE OKAY. 828 00:49:13,384 --> 00:49:19,255 RIGHT. YOU'RE SO RIGHT. SO JUST GET YOURSELF TOGETHER. YOU LOOK SMASHING. 829 00:49:19,257 --> 00:49:21,090 I LOOK BEAUTIFUL. YOU LOOK AMAZING. 830 00:49:21,092 --> 00:49:23,793 I LOOK BEAUTIFUL. I LOOK BEAUTIFUL. YOU DO. AMAZING. 831 00:49:23,795 --> 00:49:28,197 THANK YOU. NOW GET OFF MY DRESS. OH, GOD. I'M SORRY. 832 00:49:28,199 --> 00:49:31,801 - I'M GETTING MARRIED! - YEA! 833 00:49:37,008 --> 00:49:39,241 - HI. - [ Grunts ] 834 00:49:40,845 --> 00:49:50,419 �� 835 00:49:50,421 --> 00:49:53,189 �� [ Dissonant Notes ] 836 00:49:54,525 --> 00:49:57,793 I BET YOU MISS GRANDMA. GRANDMA? 837 00:49:59,330 --> 00:50:01,197 WHERE IS SHE? 838 00:50:09,974 --> 00:50:12,975 �� [ Dissonant Notes Continue ] 839 00:50:17,015 --> 00:50:22,184 [ Mouthing Words ] 840 00:50:24,355 --> 00:50:27,256 [ Doorknob Clatters To Ground ] [ Gasps ] 841 00:50:29,127 --> 00:50:32,528 [ Whispering ] IT'S JESUS. LOOK! IT'S JESUS. 842 00:50:34,465 --> 00:50:36,799 BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE. 843 00:50:43,307 --> 00:50:45,641 OKAY, BOYS, WE'RE ON. 844 00:50:45,643 --> 00:50:47,777 OKAY. ALL RIGHT? OKAY. YEP. 845 00:50:47,779 --> 00:50:49,779 STRAIGHT? YEP. BIG MOMENT. 846 00:50:49,781 --> 00:50:52,615 YOU LOOK NICE TOO. DON'T STRESS. DON'T STRESS. 847 00:50:52,617 --> 00:50:55,618 A LITTLE SLAP. SLAP ME. OKAY. YEAH? HUH? 848 00:50:55,620 --> 00:50:58,521 DON'T BE GAY IN GOD'S HOUSE. GIVE ME A HIT. THANK YOU. ALL RIGHT. 849 00:50:58,523 --> 00:51:00,923 OKAY. LET'S GO. LET'S DO IT. 850 00:51:02,427 --> 00:51:05,795 �� [ "Wedding March" ] SH-SHIT. 851 00:51:05,797 --> 00:51:08,564 �� [ Continues ] 852 00:51:16,174 --> 00:51:18,374 CHRIS? [ Yelps ] 853 00:51:18,376 --> 00:51:21,444 OH, MY GOD! ARE YOU OKAY? I'M OKAY. I'M OKAY. 854 00:51:21,446 --> 00:51:25,281 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I GOT LOCKED IN. 855 00:51:25,283 --> 00:51:27,783 ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? YEAH. FUCK. 856 00:51:27,785 --> 00:51:29,785 OW. YOU OKAY? 857 00:51:29,787 --> 00:51:32,555 YEAH, I'M GOOD. I WAS STUCK. WE DON'T HAVE TO LIE ANYMORE. 858 00:51:32,557 --> 00:51:35,257 WHY? 'CAUSE I MADE FRIENDS WITH THE BRIDE. 859 00:51:35,259 --> 00:51:36,959 COOL. 860 00:51:39,163 --> 00:51:42,031 WHAT? WHAT? NO, NO, NO. YOU CANNOT LOCK THE DOOR. 861 00:51:42,033 --> 00:51:45,201 DON'T KNOCK DOWN THE DOOR. HELLO, HELLO, HELLO? 862 00:51:45,203 --> 00:51:47,103 I'M TRYING. 863 00:51:50,441 --> 00:51:53,309 OH, PLEASE, GOD. 864 00:51:55,313 --> 00:51:58,781 AH, SUKI, SUKI! AH, SUKI, SUKI. 865 00:51:58,783 --> 00:52:01,150 �� [ "Wedding March" Continues ] 866 00:52:01,152 --> 00:52:05,154 SHH! IT'S ALREADY STARTED. ALL RIGHT. 867 00:52:13,464 --> 00:52:16,232 I BET YOU MISS GRANDMA. [ Groans ] 868 00:52:16,234 --> 00:52:20,870 - DEARLY BELOVED, WE ARE GATHERED HERE TODAY... - HI. 869 00:52:20,872 --> 00:52:24,807 TO CELEBRATE THE HOLY MATRIMONY... 870 00:52:24,809 --> 00:52:29,411 OF JUDITH KATHERINE WEBB AND PETER DONAHUE. 871 00:52:29,413 --> 00:52:32,748 PETER? OOF! 872 00:52:32,750 --> 00:52:35,718 - OH, JESUS CHRIST! - [ Crowd Murmuring ] 873 00:52:35,720 --> 00:52:39,455 - IT'S PETER! SHIT! - [ Woman ] I DIDN'T DO IT. I DIDN'T DO IT. 874 00:52:39,457 --> 00:52:42,324 SHE DID IT. 875 00:52:43,661 --> 00:52:48,164 THIS-- THIS ISN'T THE GLICKMAN BAR MITZVAH? 876 00:52:48,166 --> 00:52:51,634 - IS IT? NO? - [ Groans ] - MOISHE, ARE YOU HERE? 877 00:52:51,636 --> 00:52:54,670 NO? GOOD. OKAY. MAZELTOV. COME ON, SHARON. LET'S GO. MAZELTOV. 878 00:52:54,672 --> 00:52:56,872 - CHRISTINA? - THE HOTTIE. 879 00:52:56,874 --> 00:52:59,341 [ Courtney ] SHALOM! 880 00:52:59,343 --> 00:53:02,912 � HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY � 881 00:53:02,914 --> 00:53:07,716 THAT'S THE STRANGEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN. THERE ARE NO JEWS IN SOMERSET. 882 00:53:07,718 --> 00:53:09,118 [ Coughs ] 883 00:53:09,120 --> 00:53:12,555 [ Prolonged Groaning ] SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT. 884 00:53:12,557 --> 00:53:16,025 SHALL WE PROCEED? OH, SURE. 885 00:53:17,495 --> 00:53:20,029 [ Minister Clears Throat ] 886 00:53:20,031 --> 00:53:24,900 DEARLY BELOVED, WE ARE GATHERED HERE TODAY... 887 00:53:24,902 --> 00:53:29,071 TO CELEBRATE THE HOLY MATRIMONY... 888 00:53:29,073 --> 00:53:35,211 OF JUDITH KATHERINE WEBB AND PETER DONAHUE. 889 00:53:35,213 --> 00:53:38,214 [ Clears Throat ] 890 00:53:38,216 --> 00:53:43,519 WHICH IS AN HONORABLE ESTATE, INSTITUTED OF GOD, 891 00:53:43,521 --> 00:53:48,691 SIGNIFYING UNTO US THE MYSTICAL UNION THAT IS BETWEEN CHRIST... 892 00:53:48,693 --> 00:53:50,893 AND-- 893 00:53:50,895 --> 00:53:54,897 - PETER? PETER? - SAINT-- 894 00:53:54,899 --> 00:53:57,900 - [ Tut-Tutting ] - PETER? 895 00:53:57,902 --> 00:54:00,102 YEAH? I'M HAVING RESERVATIONS. 896 00:54:00,104 --> 00:54:02,171 WHERE? 897 00:54:02,173 --> 00:54:05,541 - ...AND IS COMMENDED-- - ABOUT THIS. - REALLY? 898 00:54:05,543 --> 00:54:09,011 SHH, SHH-SHH-SHH. 899 00:54:09,013 --> 00:54:13,249 - ...ST. PAUL TO BE HONORABLE... - ME TOO. - REALLY? 900 00:54:13,251 --> 00:54:15,818 - AMONG ALL M-M-M-- - YEAH. 901 00:54:15,820 --> 00:54:21,757 SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH. ...ALL MEN, AND THEREFORE IS NOT BY ANY-- 902 00:54:21,759 --> 00:54:26,428 I MEAN, I LOVE YOU, BUT I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU. BUT I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU. 903 00:54:26,430 --> 00:54:28,697 - ...LIGHTLY. - ANYMORE. 904 00:54:28,699 --> 00:54:31,233 - OH, NO. - YOU'RE RUINING IT. 905 00:54:31,235 --> 00:54:35,871 - BUT-- - WE'RE STILL FRIENDS. - HEY, HEY! 906 00:54:35,873 --> 00:54:39,942 I DON'T WANNA GET MARRIED. I DON'T WANNA GET MARRIED! 907 00:54:39,944 --> 00:54:43,779 NO-- NO KISS. I HAVEN'T MARRIED YOU YET. 908 00:54:43,781 --> 00:54:49,218 - [ Both ] WE'RE NOT GETTING MARRIED! - [ Low Murmuring ] 909 00:54:49,220 --> 00:54:51,220 MIGUEL? 910 00:54:51,222 --> 00:54:53,455 - AHH. - DAD. 911 00:54:53,457 --> 00:54:56,892 BUT WE ARE HAVING THE PARTY. [ Both Yelling ] 912 00:54:56,894 --> 00:54:59,428 EXIT IN THE BACK. IT'S TO THE LEFT. 913 00:55:16,213 --> 00:55:18,113 [ Screaming ] 914 00:55:18,115 --> 00:55:23,085 � CLOSE YOUR EYES WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME YOUR HAND � 915 00:55:24,755 --> 00:55:28,624 � DO YOU FEEL MY HEART BEATING � HI. HOW YOU DOIN'? I'M OKAY. 916 00:55:28,626 --> 00:55:30,492 YOU OKAY? YEAH-- NO, I'M OKAY. 917 00:55:30,494 --> 00:55:33,996 YOU OWE ME 30,000 FOR THIS WEDDING. DADDY, PLEASE. 918 00:55:33,998 --> 00:55:36,532 SO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M THINKING OF DOING? WHAT'S THAT? 919 00:55:36,534 --> 00:55:41,437 I THINK I'M GONNA CASH IN THE HONEYMOON TICKETS, FLY TO BALI AND GO SCUBA DIVING. 920 00:55:41,439 --> 00:55:45,274 - I'M GONNA RIP YOUR FACE OFF, PECKER-HEAD! - DADDY, STOP. 921 00:55:45,276 --> 00:55:47,609 SWEETIE? YES? 922 00:55:47,611 --> 00:55:51,347 - I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE. - I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE: YOU'RE A FUCKIN' DEAD MAN! 923 00:55:51,349 --> 00:55:53,182 DAD. 924 00:55:53,184 --> 00:55:56,352 I MET SOMEONE. YOU MET SOMEONE? 925 00:55:56,354 --> 00:55:58,520 ON-LINE. ON-LINE. 926 00:55:58,522 --> 00:56:02,358 �� 927 00:56:02,360 --> 00:56:07,162 - HIS NAME IS RICKY. I THINK HE'S REALLY SPECIAL. - FUCK IT! IT'S GO TIME! 928 00:56:07,164 --> 00:56:11,367 SON OF A BITCH! DADDY, STOP IT! 929 00:56:23,047 --> 00:56:25,714 COURT? MM-HMM? 930 00:56:25,716 --> 00:56:30,552 REFRESH MY MEMORY. WAS THAT PETER'S WEDDING WE WALKED IN ON? 931 00:56:32,289 --> 00:56:34,223 YEAH. 932 00:56:34,225 --> 00:56:36,592 THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT. YEP. 933 00:56:38,662 --> 00:56:42,798 I'M SUCH AN IDIOT. NO, YOU'RE NOT. 934 00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:46,502 I MEET A GUY FOR TWO MINUTES, 935 00:56:46,504 --> 00:56:51,407 AND I'M CHASING AFTER HIM LIKE HE'S SOMETHING SPECIAL. 936 00:56:51,409 --> 00:56:55,511 WELL, MAYBE YOU WANT SOMEONE SPECIAL... 937 00:56:55,513 --> 00:56:57,880 FOR ONCE, YOU KNOW? 938 00:56:57,882 --> 00:57:01,750 MAYBE YOU WERE THINKIN' THAT YOU WERE TIRED... 939 00:57:01,752 --> 00:57:04,286 OF THE GAME. 940 00:57:07,091 --> 00:57:08,991 YOU TIRED OF THE GAME? 941 00:57:11,195 --> 00:57:13,162 YEP. 942 00:57:15,599 --> 00:57:18,400 LET'S GO HOME. 943 00:57:18,402 --> 00:57:21,036 OKAY. 944 00:57:22,740 --> 00:57:25,174 [ Chattering ] 945 00:57:27,912 --> 00:57:30,212 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. 946 00:57:30,214 --> 00:57:32,481 [ Chattering Continues ] 947 00:57:32,483 --> 00:57:35,984 [ Woman Over Police Radio ] 1034 TO ANY AND ALL UNITS: PLEASE RESPOND TO 1151 KEARNEY. 948 00:57:35,986 --> 00:57:40,689 - [ Christina ] OH, MY GOD. - [ Courtney ] WHAT'S GOING ON? - EXCUSE ME. OFFICER? 949 00:57:40,691 --> 00:57:46,295 - WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? - TWENTY YEARS, AND I'VE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING SO HORRIBLE. 950 00:57:46,297 --> 00:57:49,598 WHAT? WHERE? WHAT IS THE EMERGENCY? 951 00:57:49,600 --> 00:57:53,635 - APARTMENT THREE. - BUT THAT'S MY APARTMENT. 952 00:57:53,637 --> 00:57:55,904 JANE. JANE. JANE! 953 00:57:55,906 --> 00:57:58,874 POOR GIRL NEVER SAW IT COMING. 954 00:57:58,876 --> 00:58:03,645 EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME. [ Radio Chatter Continues ] 955 00:58:03,647 --> 00:58:06,081 CHRIST! I WOULDN'T GO IN THERE. IT'S NOT A PRETTY SIGHT. 956 00:58:06,083 --> 00:58:09,952 - I LIVE HERE. JANE! - [ Courtney ] EXCUSE ME. 957 00:58:09,954 --> 00:58:12,855 JANE? JANIE? 958 00:58:12,857 --> 00:58:15,257 JANIE? OH, JESUS! OH, MY GOD! 959 00:58:15,259 --> 00:58:18,260 - [ Jane, Muffled ] CHRISTINA? - APPARENTLY THEY'RE STUCK. 960 00:58:18,262 --> 00:58:22,965 - [ Grunting ] - [ Courtney ] WHAT DO YOU MEAN? - JANIE, ARE YOU OKAY? 961 00:58:22,967 --> 00:58:26,034 - [ Muffled, Indistinct ] - HOW ARE YOU STUCK? 962 00:58:26,036 --> 00:58:28,704 - I HAVE A PIERCING. - [ All Gasping ] 963 00:58:28,706 --> 00:58:31,673 - [ Mockingly ] OOH. - I DON'T GET IT. HOW IS SHE STUCK? 964 00:58:31,675 --> 00:58:35,777 BEHIND HER TONSILS. HOW THE HELL DO YOU KNOW THAT? 965 00:58:35,779 --> 00:58:38,881 - LISTEN, HONEY, I'M GONNA JUST PULL YOU REALLY GENTLY. - OHH, NO. 966 00:58:38,883 --> 00:58:42,451 - SHH. I'M GONNA PULL, OKAY? GENTLY. - [ Christina ] BE CAREFUL. 967 00:58:42,453 --> 00:58:44,453 [ Screaming ] 968 00:58:44,455 --> 00:58:46,755 I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. 969 00:58:46,757 --> 00:58:50,726 WE'VE GOT THE AMBULANCE OUTSIDE AND THE O.R. PREPPED FOR SURGERY. WE HAVE TO GET GOING. 970 00:58:50,728 --> 00:58:53,529 - NO, NO, NO. WAIT, WAIT. - WHAT? - [ Christina ] SHE COULD SING. 971 00:58:53,531 --> 00:58:56,598 YOU COULD SING. IT RELAXES THE THROAT. TRY. RIGHT, RIGHT. 972 00:58:56,600 --> 00:59:01,603 TRY, TRY-- � RELAX, DON'T DO IT WHEN YOU WANNA GET TO IT � 973 00:59:01,605 --> 00:59:04,773 � RELAX, DON'T DO IT WHEN YOU WANNA COME � 974 00:59:04,775 --> 00:59:07,809 - STOP IT. YOU'RE GETTIN' ME HARD AGAIN. - [ Gulping ] 975 00:59:07,811 --> 00:59:10,746 - IT'S-- IT'S THE WRONG SONG. OKAY. - [ Christina ] WHAT? WHAT? 976 00:59:10,748 --> 00:59:13,282 ARMAGEDDON. [ Both ] � I COULD � 977 00:59:13,284 --> 00:59:15,918 � STAY AWAKE � 978 00:59:15,920 --> 00:59:20,255 � JUST TO HEAR YOU BREATHIN' � 979 00:59:20,257 --> 00:59:24,259 � WATCH YOU SMILE WHILE YOU ARE SLEEPIN' � 980 00:59:24,261 --> 00:59:26,428 [ Both ] � I COULD SPEND MY LIFE � 981 00:59:26,430 --> 00:59:29,364 � IN THIS SWEET SURRENDER � 982 00:59:29,366 --> 00:59:34,570 - COME ON, SWEETIE. TRY. - [ Muffled ] 983 00:59:36,407 --> 00:59:39,942 � AS EVERY MOMENT SPENT WITH YOU � 984 00:59:39,944 --> 00:59:45,447 [ All ] � IS A MOMENT I TREASURE � 985 00:59:45,449 --> 00:59:48,617 � I DON'T WANNA CLOSE MY EYES � 986 00:59:48,619 --> 00:59:51,353 � I DON'T WANNA FALL ASLEEP � 987 00:59:51,355 --> 00:59:56,191 - � 'CAUSE I'D MISS YOU, BABY � - � AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THING � 988 00:59:56,193 --> 00:59:59,561 � 'CAUSE EVEN WHEN I DREAM OF YOU � 989 00:59:59,563 --> 01:00:02,631 � THE SWEETEST DREAM WILL NEVER DO � 990 01:00:02,633 --> 01:00:07,502 � I'D STILL MISS YOU, BABY AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THING � 991 01:00:07,504 --> 01:00:12,975 � I DON'T WANNA CLOSE MY EYES I DON'T WANNA FALL ASLEEP � 992 01:00:12,977 --> 01:00:17,813 � 'CAUSE I'LL MISS YOU, BABY AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THING � 993 01:00:17,815 --> 01:00:21,683 � EVEN WHEN I DREAM OF YOU � YES! OH, JANIE! YES! 994 01:00:21,685 --> 01:00:23,785 � THE SWEETEST THING WILL NEVER DO � 995 01:00:23,787 --> 01:00:28,790 � I STILL MISS YOU, BABY AND I DON'T WANNA MISS A THING �� 996 01:00:28,792 --> 01:00:33,161 [ Shrieks ] � HOW DO I LIVE WITHOUT YOU � 997 01:00:33,163 --> 01:00:36,698 � I WANT TO KNOW �� WHAT? 998 01:00:36,700 --> 01:00:38,900 [ Christina ] IT WAS MILLI. IT WAS VANILLI. 999 01:00:38,902 --> 01:00:40,969 OH, WHATEVER. NO. NOT "WHATEVER." 1000 01:00:40,971 --> 01:00:45,741 SO SHE SAYS TO HIM, "GIRL, YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE" CHANGED MY LIFE. 1001 01:00:45,743 --> 01:00:49,144 IT DID, OKAY? I'M SORRY. A TEAR-- JUST A SAD LITTLE TEAR SLOWLY-- 1002 01:00:49,146 --> 01:00:52,381 OH, COME ON. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? I WAS 16 YEARS OLD. 1003 01:00:52,383 --> 01:00:56,551 OKAY? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I STARTED TALKING TO HER IN THE SECOND GRADE. 1004 01:00:56,553 --> 01:00:59,054 - I SWEAR, I DON'T. - BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT I WAS THE SHIT. 1005 01:00:59,056 --> 01:01:02,858 - YOU ARE THE SHIT. - [ Cell Phone Rings ] - SHITHEAD. 1006 01:01:02,860 --> 01:01:05,927 - OH, MY GOD. - WHAT? 1007 01:01:05,929 --> 01:01:09,531 THEY FOUND A DONOR FOR MY PATIENT. OKAY. I GOTTA GO. SORRY, GUYS. 1008 01:01:09,533 --> 01:01:12,534 - YOU KNOW WHAT, CHRISTINA? IT WAS GREAT MEETING YOU. - IT WAS NICE TO MEET YOU, GREG. 1009 01:01:12,536 --> 01:01:15,704 -JANE, IT WAS GREAT MEETING YOU. -[ Muffled ] GREAT MEETING YOU. 1010 01:01:15,706 --> 01:01:19,641 -SO SORRY I HAVE TO RUN OFF. I'LL MAKE YOU RISOTTO TOMORROW. -IT'S FINE. 1011 01:01:19,643 --> 01:01:23,045 - IT'S GOOD. - [ Greg ] OKAY. - BYE. 1012 01:01:23,047 --> 01:01:27,149 - OKAY, CAN I JUST SAY, THAT WAS SO SWEET? - HE'S GREAT. 1013 01:01:27,151 --> 01:01:31,720 - SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP. - HE'S SO SWEET. - HE DOESN'T HAVE PIERCINGS? 1014 01:01:31,722 --> 01:01:33,722 NO. 1015 01:01:33,724 --> 01:01:37,359 UM, I DON'T KNOW, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE, UM, 1016 01:01:37,361 --> 01:01:42,431 I HAVEN'T DONE THAT WITH HIM YET, SO, YOU KNOW-- 1017 01:01:42,433 --> 01:01:48,637 OH, YOU REALLY DO LIKE HIM. I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT, 'CAUSE I'M GONNA JINX IT, SO-- 1018 01:01:48,639 --> 01:01:51,540 OHH. 1019 01:01:51,542 --> 01:01:56,545 � AND IT'S A STRANGE CONDITION � 1020 01:01:56,547 --> 01:01:59,781 � A DAY IN PRISON � 1021 01:01:59,783 --> 01:02:01,917 � IT'S GOT ME OUT OF MY HEAD � 1022 01:02:01,919 --> 01:02:06,588 � AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAME HERE FOR � 1023 01:02:06,590 --> 01:02:10,592 � OH, I WANT YOU TO KNOW � 1024 01:02:13,997 --> 01:02:16,431 [ Numbers Beeping ] 1025 01:02:18,802 --> 01:02:21,570 [ Phone Beeps Off ] 1026 01:02:36,420 --> 01:02:40,756 � IT'S A STRANGE CONDITION � 1027 01:02:40,758 --> 01:02:44,826 � A DAY IN PRISON � HEY. 1028 01:02:44,828 --> 01:02:47,062 HEY. � IT'S GOT ME OUT OF MY HEAD AND I DON'T KNOW �� 1029 01:02:47,064 --> 01:02:49,931 I CLOSED ON THE MAHALOCK HOUSE TODAY. GREAT NEWS FOR YOU. 1030 01:02:49,933 --> 01:02:55,771 YOU DON'T NEED TO DO A THING. WHAT DID THEY SAY ABOUT MY ALUMINUM SIDING? 1031 01:02:55,773 --> 01:02:57,672 NO. 1032 01:02:57,674 --> 01:03:01,042 REALLY? REALLY. BE CAREFUL WITH THOSE FAT-FREE CHIPS. 1033 01:03:01,044 --> 01:03:05,247 THEY CAUSE ANAL LEAKAGE. YOU CAUSE ANAL LEAKAGE. 1034 01:03:05,249 --> 01:03:08,383 IT SAYS SO ON THE BAG. 1035 01:03:11,088 --> 01:03:13,522 [ Spitting ] 1036 01:03:16,360 --> 01:03:21,329 WHAT-- WHAT KIND OF MARKETING BRAINIAC PUTS "ANAL LEAKAGE" ON HIS PRODUCT? 1037 01:03:21,331 --> 01:03:24,599 HOW CAN THEY EVEN SELL THAT CRAP? 1038 01:03:24,601 --> 01:03:26,935 WHAT TIME'S YOUR FLIGHT? 9:30. 1039 01:03:28,572 --> 01:03:31,506 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE GOING TO COSTA RICA. [ Sighs ] 1040 01:03:31,508 --> 01:03:35,177 - YOU KNOW, YOUR FEMALE PROBLEMS ARE COMPLETELY OVER WITH. - HOPE SO. 1041 01:03:35,179 --> 01:03:38,847 OH, THEY ARE. YOU KNOW WHAT I HEAR ABOUT COSTA RICAN WOMEN? 1042 01:03:38,849 --> 01:03:41,316 - FOR FIVE PESOS-- - NO, NO. ROG, ROG. 1043 01:03:41,318 --> 01:03:45,687 - THEY TAKE YOUR CHIMICHANGA AND YOUR POQUITO-- - NO, NO, SE�OR. SE�OR-- 1044 01:03:45,689 --> 01:03:47,923 LISTEN TO ME. NO. NO QUIERO. 1045 01:03:47,925 --> 01:03:52,327 ALL I'M SAYIN' IS MAKE NICE WITH THE CONCIERGE, OKAY? [ Car Horn Tooting ] 1046 01:03:53,931 --> 01:03:59,000 - YOU ALL RIGHT, VERA? - COULDN'T BE BETTER! OHH. 1047 01:04:00,737 --> 01:04:03,371 THANK YOU SO MUCH. WHERE DO YOU WANT IT? 1048 01:04:03,373 --> 01:04:06,274 JUST PUT HER DOWN RIGHT HERE, BOYS. OKEYDOKEY. 1049 01:04:06,276 --> 01:04:09,311 PETER, SINCE YOU'RE GOING AWAY-- DO YOU WANNA BE ON OUR MAILING LIST? 1050 01:04:09,313 --> 01:04:13,114 YES, I WOULD, MA'AM. I'D LOVE TO. THANK YOU. 1051 01:04:13,116 --> 01:04:17,552 PETE, I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET US OFF THAT MAILING LIST SINCE 1982. 1052 01:04:17,554 --> 01:04:21,756 RELAX, ROG. THIS IS THE HOTTEST CHICK THAT'S EVER BEEN IN THIS STORE, YOU KNOW? 1053 01:04:21,758 --> 01:04:25,594 THEY CAUGHT HER TRYING TO ESCAPE. 1054 01:04:34,538 --> 01:04:39,040 [ Christina Crying ] 1055 01:04:44,014 --> 01:04:48,149 THAT IS SO WEIRD. I KNOW. VERY STRANGE. 1056 01:04:48,151 --> 01:04:50,986 [ Imitates Vocal Tic ] I KNOW. 1057 01:04:50,988 --> 01:04:54,589 HEY. HEY. 1058 01:04:54,591 --> 01:04:58,793 SWEETIE? CHRISTINA, WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT HAPPENED? 1059 01:04:58,795 --> 01:05:03,798 I CAME TO JUST EAT MY COOKIE AND MAKE A PHONE CALL. 1060 01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:07,602 YOU DIDN'T WANT TO EAT THE COOKIES? NO, NO, NO, NO. 1061 01:05:07,604 --> 01:05:11,072 JUST READ THIS. ALL RIGHT. 1062 01:05:11,074 --> 01:05:15,477 "COMMANDMENT NUMBER NINE: THOU SHALT LOVE WHAT'S POSSIBLE." 1063 01:05:15,479 --> 01:05:19,614 - OH, CHRISTINA, HONEY, WE'VE GONE OVER THIS. - NOT THAT ONE. 1064 01:05:19,616 --> 01:05:22,651 YOU DID NOT KNOW THE GUY WAS GONNA BE GETTING MARRIED, ALL RIGHT? 1065 01:05:22,653 --> 01:05:26,388 IT'S ALL RIGHT. IT JUST WASN'T POSSIBLE, SWEETIE. NOT THAT ONE. 1066 01:05:26,390 --> 01:05:30,525 - THE NEXT ONE. COMMANDMENT TEN. - COMMANDMENT TEN. - "THOU SHALT NOT FEAR?" 1067 01:05:30,527 --> 01:05:35,764 - YES. "THOU SHALT NOT FEAR." - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, "FEAR"? 1068 01:05:35,766 --> 01:05:38,466 WHAT YOU DID WAS AN INCREDIBLY BRAVE THING. 1069 01:05:38,468 --> 01:05:43,204 YOU COMPLETELY DROPPED ALL OF YOUR BOUNDARIES, AND YOU MET THIS GUY HALFWAY. 1070 01:05:43,206 --> 01:05:48,443 - YOU MET HIM MORE THAN HALFWAY. YOU WENT TO SOMERSET. - YOU GUYS, IT WAS ANOTHER GAME. 1071 01:05:48,445 --> 01:05:53,782 COME ON. IF HE HADN'T BEEN GETTING MARRIED, WHAT DO YOU THINK I WOULD'VE DONE? 1072 01:05:53,784 --> 01:05:59,087 HUH? THAT'S RIGHT. COURT, YOU KNOW. 1073 01:05:59,089 --> 01:06:03,158 I WOULD'VE DONE THE SAME OLD THING. I WOULD'VE HESITATED. 1074 01:06:03,160 --> 01:06:06,928 I WOULD'VE FROZE UP. 1075 01:06:06,930 --> 01:06:10,532 I WOULD'VE KISSED HIM AND THEN RAN OFF. 1076 01:06:10,534 --> 01:06:14,035 [ Sighs ] GIVE HIM THE WRONG PHONE NUMBER. 1077 01:06:14,037 --> 01:06:19,107 HOOK THAT FISH AND JUST THROW HIM RIGHT BACK. 1078 01:06:19,109 --> 01:06:21,076 JESUS. 1079 01:06:25,315 --> 01:06:29,718 - I'M STUCK IN A RUT. - OH, SWEETIE. 1080 01:06:31,088 --> 01:06:34,089 A BIG, FAT RUT. 1081 01:06:35,892 --> 01:06:40,195 YOU GUYS, I DON'T WANNA BE THAT GIRL ANYMORE. 1082 01:06:40,197 --> 01:06:42,497 I KNOW. YOU KNOW? 1083 01:06:42,499 --> 01:06:45,533 I KNOW. NONE OF US DO. 1084 01:06:48,472 --> 01:06:52,173 LET'S GO DANCING. 1085 01:06:52,175 --> 01:06:54,709 � YOU KNOW, IT'S TIME � 1086 01:06:54,711 --> 01:06:59,247 SO, ANY CHANCE? OF WHAT? NO-HO. DON'T EVEN BOTHER. 1087 01:06:59,249 --> 01:07:03,585 SHE'S ON A MISSION. � YOU KNOW, IT'S TIME � 1088 01:07:03,587 --> 01:07:09,457 � TO GIVE UP ON YOUR MIND � 1089 01:07:09,459 --> 01:07:13,795 - �� [ Continues, Indistinct ] - HOW'S IT SHAKIN', LADIES? 1090 01:07:13,797 --> 01:07:16,998 NO, THANK YOU. YOUR BODY IS BANGING. 1091 01:07:17,000 --> 01:07:19,968 YOUR FACE IS TOO. NEAT-O. THANKS. NEAT. 1092 01:07:19,970 --> 01:07:24,339 � IT'S TIME � � JUST COME ON � 1093 01:07:24,341 --> 01:07:28,576 � JUST GIVE IN � [ Indistinct ] WHAT'S GOIN' ON, HOT MAMA? 1094 01:07:28,578 --> 01:07:32,881 YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. BRINGIN' IT DOWN NOW. 1095 01:07:32,883 --> 01:07:36,084 BRINGIN' IT UP NOW. OH, YEAH. 1096 01:07:36,086 --> 01:07:39,354 WHOOP, WHOOP! YEAH. HERE IT COMES, BABY. 1097 01:07:39,356 --> 01:07:44,159 FEEL THE MONKEY. WORK THE MONKEY, MONKEY, MONK! THE MONKEY, THE MONKEY! 1098 01:07:44,161 --> 01:07:47,996 THE MONKEY. OOH-OOH, AH-AH. [ Laughing ] 1099 01:07:47,998 --> 01:07:51,433 THE MONKEY, THE MONKEY. YEAH. YOU WORKIN' THAT MONKEY. 1100 01:07:51,435 --> 01:07:54,069 YOU'RE A GOOD DANCER. THANKS. 1101 01:07:54,071 --> 01:07:57,772 NO. YOU ARE. YOU HAVE SOME ORIGINAL MOVES. I'VE BEEN WORKIN' ON 'EM. 1102 01:07:57,774 --> 01:08:01,109 HAVE WE MET BEFORE? A COUPLE TIMES. 1103 01:08:01,111 --> 01:08:03,845 I'M DONNY. 1104 01:08:03,847 --> 01:08:08,950 HI. [ Laughs Nervously ] CHRISTINA. 1105 01:08:08,952 --> 01:08:13,154 IT FEELS LIKE SIXTEEN CANDLES. 1106 01:08:13,156 --> 01:08:16,357 I'D LOVE TO TAKE YOU OUT SOMETIME. REALLY? 1107 01:08:16,359 --> 01:08:22,597 WELL, THAT'S NICE. I MEAN, GIVE ME YOUR CARD. I'LL CALL YOU SOMETIME. 1108 01:08:23,900 --> 01:08:28,002 THANK YOU. YOU SEEM LIKE A REALLY NICE PERSON. 1109 01:08:28,004 --> 01:08:31,973 YEAH, WORK THAT MONKEY. I'LL WORK ON THE MONKEY. 1110 01:08:34,544 --> 01:08:37,579 � WHEN YOU FEEL IT IN YOUR BODY YOU'VE FOUND SOMEBODY � 1111 01:08:37,581 --> 01:08:42,584 � WHO MAKES YOU CHANGE YOUR WAYS LIKE HANGIN' WITH YOU, COOL � 1112 01:08:42,586 --> 01:08:46,488 � SO YOU ACT LIKE YOU READY BUT YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW � 1113 01:08:46,490 --> 01:08:49,824 � AND EVERYTHING IN YOUR PAST YOU WANNA LET IT GO � 1114 01:08:49,826 --> 01:08:53,361 � I BEEN THERE, DONE IT � [ Indistinct ] 1115 01:08:53,363 --> 01:08:56,798 � AFTER ALL THAT THIS IS WHAT I FOUND � 1116 01:08:56,800 --> 01:09:00,235 � NOBODY WANTS TO BE ALONE � 1117 01:09:00,237 --> 01:09:03,071 HEY, DONNY. HI. HEY. 1118 01:09:03,073 --> 01:09:05,840 HEY, DO YOU HAVE A PEN? YOU BETCHA. 1119 01:09:05,842 --> 01:09:09,844 � YOU GOT IT YOU GOT IT BAD � [ Continues, Indistinct ] 1120 01:09:09,846 --> 01:09:14,115 I'M A JERK, AND I WANNA APOLOGIZE, BECAUSE I DID NOT PLAN ON CALLING YOU. 1121 01:09:14,117 --> 01:09:17,152 I AM GONNA GIVE YOU MY NUMBER SO THAT YOU CAN CALL ME... 1122 01:09:17,154 --> 01:09:20,321 BECAUSE I FOUND OUT SOMETHING... 1123 01:09:20,323 --> 01:09:26,294 THAT WAS COMPLETELY LIFE-CHANGING-- THAT IT'S OKAY TO TAKE A CHANCE, YOU KNOW? 1124 01:09:26,296 --> 01:09:30,265 IT'S OKAY TO. LOVE IS CRAZY, AND THAT'S WHAT LOVE IS. IT'S TAKING A CHANCE. 1125 01:09:30,267 --> 01:09:35,470 AND MY GIRLFRIEND COURTNEY AND I WENT ON THIS CRAZY RIDE AND WENT FOR A GUY. 1126 01:09:35,472 --> 01:09:39,874 I WENT ACROSS THE STATE PRACTICALLY TO FIND THIS GUY THAT I DON'T EVEN KNOW. 1127 01:09:39,876 --> 01:09:44,512 AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU. BUT HERE I AM, I'M HAVING THIS CONVERSATION WITH YOU. 1128 01:09:44,514 --> 01:09:49,517 AND I KNOW THAT IF I JUST TAKE A CHANCE-- MAYBE WITH YOU-- THAT, I DON'T KNOW-- 1129 01:09:49,519 --> 01:09:55,857 FORGET IT. UH, WHAT'S A GUY GOTTA DO TO GET LAID? 1130 01:09:55,859 --> 01:09:58,660 � YOU GOT IT YOU GOT IT BAD � 1131 01:09:58,662 --> 01:10:02,964 � HANG YOUR OWN PHONE UP HANG UP AND CALL RIGHT BACK � 1132 01:10:02,966 --> 01:10:05,667 � OH, YOU GOT IT YOU GOT IT BAD � 1133 01:10:05,669 --> 01:10:10,405 � IF YOU MISS A DATE YOU'RE AFRAID YOUR WHOLE LIFE'S A DRAG � 1134 01:10:10,407 --> 01:10:15,376 � OH, YOU GOT IT BAD WHEN YOU'RE STUCK IN THE HOUSE � 1135 01:10:15,378 --> 01:10:21,382 � AND YOU DON'T WANNA HAVE FUN THE MORE YOU THINK ABOUT IT YOU GOT IT BAD �� 1136 01:10:21,384 --> 01:10:24,886 �� [ Continues, Indistinct ] [ Christina ] NO PROBLEM. OKAY. HERE YOU GO. 1137 01:10:24,888 --> 01:10:27,989 [ Talking, Indistinct ] 1138 01:10:32,696 --> 01:10:35,630 UM, CHRIS? YEAH? 1139 01:10:35,632 --> 01:10:38,466 HONEY? 1140 01:10:38,468 --> 01:10:40,969 UH-- WAIT. WHAT? 1141 01:10:43,740 --> 01:10:45,907 OH, MY GOD. 1142 01:10:48,411 --> 01:10:53,781 WHAT AM I GONNA DO? I THINK YOU CAN HANDLE THIS ONE ON YOUR OWN. 1143 01:10:53,783 --> 01:10:57,652 IT'S ALL GOOD, GIRL. SHH. 1144 01:10:57,654 --> 01:11:02,090 FIGURE THIS ONE OUT. FIGURE IT OUT. OKAY. 1145 01:11:02,092 --> 01:11:05,059 - [ Imitates Rooster Crowing ] - [ Courtney ] STOP. 1146 01:11:07,397 --> 01:11:09,530 CHRISTINA. 1147 01:11:09,532 --> 01:11:12,700 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1148 01:11:12,702 --> 01:11:15,303 I CAME HERE TO APOLOGIZE TO YOU. 1149 01:11:15,305 --> 01:11:19,207 FOR WHAT? FOR NOT TELLING YOU I WAS GETTING MARRIED. 1150 01:11:19,209 --> 01:11:22,577 I SHOULD'VE TOLD YOU THAT, AND I DIDN'T. AND I'M SORRY. 1151 01:11:22,579 --> 01:11:25,713 YOU'RE THE GUY THAT NEEDS THE LAST FLING BEFORE YOUR WEDDING. THAT'S-- 1152 01:11:25,715 --> 01:11:31,019 NO, NO. I'M NOT THAT GUY. YOU SPILLED MY DRINK, AND I LET YOU BUY ME A BEER. 1153 01:11:31,021 --> 01:11:33,888 THAT WAS ALL THERE WAS TO IT. 1154 01:11:35,825 --> 01:11:39,193 WE HAD FUN. WE TALKED. THAT WAS IT. 1155 01:11:39,195 --> 01:11:40,928 RIGHT? 1156 01:11:40,930 --> 01:11:45,400 YEAH, I GUESS YOU'RE RIGHT. 1157 01:11:45,402 --> 01:11:48,436 I DIDN'T GET MARRIED. 1158 01:11:52,542 --> 01:11:56,577 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? JUDY AND I, WE CALLED IT OFF. 1159 01:11:56,579 --> 01:11:58,613 WELL, 1160 01:11:58,615 --> 01:12:03,551 I HOPE THAT THING THAT HAPPENED DIDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH IT. 1161 01:12:03,553 --> 01:12:06,654 NO, NO, NO, NO. IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT. 1162 01:12:06,656 --> 01:12:09,824 JUDY AND I BOTH REALIZED WE WERE DOING THE WRONG THING. 1163 01:12:09,826 --> 01:12:12,727 I MEAN, TWO PEOPLE SHOULD BE IN LOVE. 1164 01:12:12,729 --> 01:12:16,097 BUT JUDY-- I MEAN, SHE'S HAPPY. SHE'S SCUBA DIVING IN BALI. 1165 01:12:16,099 --> 01:12:20,468 SHE REALLY LIKED YOU TOO. SHE THOUGHT YOU WERE GREAT. WHY WERE YOU AT MY WEDDING? 1166 01:12:20,470 --> 01:12:22,403 [ Sighs ] YOU KNOW, 1167 01:12:22,405 --> 01:12:27,175 IT WAS JUST ONE OF THOSE SORT OF SPONTANEOUS THINGS MY GIRLFRIEND AND I DO. 1168 01:12:27,177 --> 01:12:33,314 IT WAS JUST REALLY-- IT JUST GOT SCREWED UP. 1169 01:12:35,051 --> 01:12:40,955 LOOK, I CAME HERE TONIGHT 'CAUSE I WANTED TO SEE YA. 1170 01:12:40,957 --> 01:12:45,626 AND I THOUGHT THAT MAYBE, UH-- 1171 01:12:45,628 --> 01:12:50,998 WELL, THAT NIGHT THAT WE MET, I THOUGHT THERE WAS SOMETHING, 1172 01:12:51,000 --> 01:12:53,334 SOME FEELING I HAD ABOUT US OR-- 1173 01:12:53,336 --> 01:12:58,039 I THOUGHT THAT MAYBE YOU MIGHT FEEL THAT WAY TOO. 1174 01:12:58,041 --> 01:13:01,909 IS THIS A MUTUAL THING, OR AM I JUST-- THIS IS NOT A MUTUAL THING AT ALL. 1175 01:13:01,911 --> 01:13:05,980 THIS IS A VERY STUPID THING. I AM STUPID. I SHOULD GO. WAIT, WAIT. 1176 01:13:05,982 --> 01:13:11,352 I REALLY APOLOGIZE FOR WASTING YOUR TIME, AND I'M GONNA JUMP OFF THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE. 1177 01:13:11,354 --> 01:13:14,789 THANKS. SEE YA. I'M STUPID. THAT'S RIGHT. 1178 01:13:14,791 --> 01:13:20,361 IN FACT, THAT'S IT-- EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED TO-- TO DO. 1179 01:13:20,363 --> 01:13:24,565 THAT'S, UH-- YES, YES. GOSH, IT'S GOING SO WELL. 1180 01:13:24,567 --> 01:13:26,667 YES. 1181 01:13:46,156 --> 01:13:49,490 I'M NOT GONNA BE AFRAID. 1182 01:13:54,864 --> 01:13:57,064 PETER? 1183 01:13:59,269 --> 01:14:02,670 SHIT! PETER? PETER, WAIT! 1184 01:14:06,209 --> 01:14:08,743 PETER! 1185 01:14:08,745 --> 01:14:10,978 PETER? 1186 01:14:14,350 --> 01:14:16,317 SHIT. 1187 01:14:19,889 --> 01:14:23,224 [ Muttering ] 1188 01:14:24,661 --> 01:14:27,094 HI. 1189 01:14:33,036 --> 01:14:35,703 COME ON! OH! [ Laughs ] 1190 01:14:35,705 --> 01:14:38,639 ARE YOU OKAY? 1191 01:14:38,641 --> 01:14:41,509 YES. OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. 1192 01:14:41,511 --> 01:14:44,479 LOOK, I DON'T THINK I REALLY HANDLED THAT TOO WELL. NO, LISTEN. 1193 01:14:44,481 --> 01:14:47,815 I DIDN'T HANDLE IT AT ALL. I'M SO SORRY. 1194 01:14:47,817 --> 01:14:52,753 LOOK, I WANTED TO FIND YOU SO I COULD TELL YOU THAT-- WHAT I COULDN'T TELL YOU UP THERE, 1195 01:14:52,755 --> 01:14:55,923 WHICH WAS THAT I DID COME TO YOUR WEDDING BECAUSE I WANTED TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 1196 01:14:55,925 --> 01:15:00,094 BECAUSE THE FEELING IS MUTUAL, AND YOU'D BETTER BE A REALLY GOOD KISSER. 1197 01:15:10,573 --> 01:15:11,772 WOW. 1198 01:15:13,610 --> 01:15:15,676 THAT WAS WEAK. 1199 01:15:15,678 --> 01:15:18,079 WEAK? YEAH. 1200 01:15:20,350 --> 01:15:22,850 IT'S OKAY. YOU CAN TRY AGAIN. 1201 01:15:22,852 --> 01:15:25,019 OKAY? 1202 01:15:33,663 --> 01:15:37,064 YOU WERE SO MUCH BETTER IN MY DREAM. IT'S WEIRD. WH-- 1203 01:15:37,066 --> 01:15:39,534 HOLD THESE. 1204 01:15:42,639 --> 01:15:45,973 I THOUGHT THIS WAS, LIKE, MUTUAL. OH, MY GOD. 1205 01:15:45,975 --> 01:15:49,210 NO, I'M SERIOUS. LISTEN, I'LL CALL YOU, OKAY? 1206 01:15:49,212 --> 01:15:52,179 WHAT? WAIT, WAIT. 1207 01:15:52,181 --> 01:15:55,816 - THANKS FOR THE FLOWERS. REALLY NICE TOUCH. - I'M OUT OF PRACTICE. 1208 01:15:55,818 --> 01:15:59,820 I JUST WOKE UP. UNBELIEVABLE! 1209 01:16:06,930 --> 01:16:09,897 CHRISTINA WALTERS. YEP, I KNOW HER. 1210 01:16:09,899 --> 01:16:13,701 BITCH. MADE MY LIFE A LIVING HELL. 1211 01:16:13,703 --> 01:16:17,305 FIRST SHE TRIES TO PAWN ME OFF ON HER FRIEND. THEN SHE CALLS ME A DICK. 1212 01:16:17,307 --> 01:16:19,874 THEN SHE HUNTS ME DOWN LIKE A DOG AT MY OWN WEDDING. 1213 01:16:19,876 --> 01:16:24,211 THEN, WHEN I TRY TO APOLOGIZE FOR EVERYTHING, SHE'S LIKE, "I DON'T KNOW YOU. 1214 01:16:24,213 --> 01:16:28,282 "YOU'RE ONE OF HUNDREDS. I HAVE NO FEELINGS FOR YOU. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. 1215 01:16:28,284 --> 01:16:31,819 WAH, WAH, WAH. LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA." 1216 01:16:31,821 --> 01:16:33,654 [ Shrieks ] 1217 01:16:33,656 --> 01:16:36,557 IS THAT HOW I SOUNDED? "BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH"? 1218 01:16:38,261 --> 01:16:43,931 LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA. THE MOVIE IS STARTING. 1219 01:16:43,933 --> 01:16:46,934 LET'S GO. 1220 01:16:46,936 --> 01:16:49,937 [ Chattering Continues ] 1221 01:16:49,939 --> 01:16:53,140 [ All Laughing, Screeching ] 1222 01:16:56,579 --> 01:16:59,213 [ Peter ] WHO LOVES YA? WHO'S YOUR DADDY? 1223 01:16:59,215 --> 01:17:01,349 [ Laughing ] 1224 01:17:13,096 --> 01:17:16,964 - FUCK GRANDMA. - � WHEN IT'S OVER � 1225 01:17:16,966 --> 01:17:22,703 � THAT'S THE TIME I FALL IN LOVE AGAIN � 1226 01:17:25,208 --> 01:17:27,842 SAVE YOURSELF A BUCK. 1227 01:17:30,647 --> 01:17:32,880 - � AND WHEN YOU GO, GO, GO � - A GIRL THAT YOU LICK. 1228 01:17:32,882 --> 01:17:35,883 REALLY? YES. THAT YOU LICK. A GIRL THAT I LICK? 1229 01:17:35,885 --> 01:17:39,887 - [ Arguing, Screaming ] - � I KNOW IT NEVER ENDS � 1230 01:17:39,889 --> 01:17:43,357 - OW, OW, OW. - � ALL THE THINGS THAT I USED TO SAY � 1231 01:17:43,359 --> 01:17:46,060 ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? 1232 01:17:46,062 --> 01:17:51,132 - ARE YOU GUYS WATCHING THE CREDITS NOW? - � HAVE GONE OUT THE WINDOW � 1233 01:17:51,134 --> 01:17:53,768 [ Sobbing ] 1234 01:17:56,939 --> 01:17:58,539 OH, GOD! 1235 01:18:00,476 --> 01:18:03,177 � ALL THE THINGS THAT SHE USED TO BRING � 1236 01:18:03,179 --> 01:18:05,846 -� ALL THE SONGS THAT SHE USED TO SING � -[ Chris, Courtney Screaming ] 1237 01:18:05,848 --> 01:18:09,750 - CHICKS FREAK ON THIS GUY. - YOU OWE ME 30-- AW, SHEESH. 1238 01:18:09,752 --> 01:18:12,486 [ Screaming ] 1239 01:18:15,391 --> 01:18:19,894 � HOW DO I LIVE WITHOUT-- � YEAH. COPY THAT. 1240 01:18:21,731 --> 01:18:25,700 - [ Catcalling ] - [ Imitating Lightsabers ] 1241 01:18:25,702 --> 01:18:29,837 IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT, HUH? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? 1242 01:18:32,675 --> 01:18:37,378 - � I KNOW IT NEVER ENDS � - I THINK THERE'S ALWAYS TIME FOR A MOVIE MONTAGE. 1243 01:18:37,380 --> 01:18:41,482 � IT NEVER ENDS � � ALL THE THINGS I USED TO SAY � 1244 01:18:41,484 --> 01:18:43,584 � ALL THE WORDS THAT GOT IN THE WAY � 1245 01:18:43,586 --> 01:18:47,621 � ALL THE THINGS THAT I USED TO KNOW HAVE GONE OUT THE WINDOW � 1246 01:18:47,623 --> 01:18:53,861 - DON'T YOU LIKE HOW SEXY I AM? - OH! [ Shrieking Laughter ] 1247 01:18:57,133 --> 01:19:02,169 OKAY! I'M NOT GONNA BE AFRAID! 1248 01:19:02,171 --> 01:19:05,039 [ Crew Laughing ] 1249 01:19:05,041 --> 01:19:07,241 I'M NOT! 1250 01:19:08,911 --> 01:19:14,915 IT'S A VERY BAD RUMOR. IT'S A RUMOR. I'M SERIOUS. CRAP. 1251 01:19:14,917 --> 01:19:17,017 [ Man ] ACTION. OW. 1252 01:19:18,688 --> 01:19:22,223 [ Crew Laughing ] 1253 01:19:22,225 --> 01:19:24,358 YOU REALLY GOT MY ASS THERE. SORRY. 1254 01:19:24,360 --> 01:19:26,527 NO, IT'S GOOD. 1255 01:19:28,865 --> 01:19:30,698 [ Man ] CUT. 1256 01:19:37,673 --> 01:19:39,673 I LOOK BEAUTIFUL. YOU LOOK AMAZING. 1257 01:19:39,675 --> 01:19:43,144 I LOOK BEAUTIFUL. I LOOK BEAUTIFUL. YOU DO. AMAZING. 1258 01:19:43,146 --> 01:19:45,713 [ Screeching ] 1259 01:19:45,715 --> 01:19:48,215 � WHEN IT'S OVER � JESUS! 1260 01:19:48,217 --> 01:19:51,652 - � THAT'S THE TIME I FALL IN LOVE AGAIN � - WE CAN SIT HERE ALL NIGHT. 1261 01:19:51,654 --> 01:19:55,289 I BET YOU MISS GRANDMA. GRANDMA! 1262 01:19:55,291 --> 01:19:59,527 � ALL THE THINGS THAT I USED TO SAY, ALL THE WORDS THAT GOT IN THE WAY � 1263 01:19:59,529 --> 01:20:03,497 � ALL THE THINGS THAT I USED TO KNOW HAVE GONE OUT THE WINDOW � 1264 01:20:03,499 --> 01:20:05,766 I'M NOT BAH-JIGGITY. YOU ARE SO BAH-JIGGITY. 1265 01:20:05,768 --> 01:20:09,403 � ALL THE THINGS SHE USED TO BRING, ALL THE SONGS THAT SHE USED TO SING � 1266 01:20:09,405 --> 01:20:14,208 � ALL HER FAVORITE TV SHOWS HAVE GONE OUT THE WINDOW � 1267 01:20:14,210 --> 01:20:19,313 � ALL THE THINGS THAT I USED TO SAY, ALL THE WORDS THAT GOT IN THE WAY � 1268 01:20:19,315 --> 01:20:23,884 - IT'S JESUS. LOOK. IT'S JESUS. - � HAVE GONE OUT THE WINDOW � 1269 01:20:23,886 --> 01:20:26,620 � ALL THE THINGS THAT SHE USED TO BRING �� SO I GUESS... 1270 01:20:26,622 --> 01:20:28,622 A BLOW JOB'S OUT OF THE QUESTION? 1271 01:20:28,624 --> 01:20:32,092 -OH, THAT IS THE SWEETEST THING. -[ All ] BYE! 1272 01:20:33,996 --> 01:20:35,796 [ Screeches ] 1273 01:20:35,798 --> 01:20:38,966 [ Man ] CUT! [ Crew Applauds ] 1274 01:20:38,968 --> 01:20:41,335 WELL, THAT WAS FUN. 1275 01:20:48,344 --> 01:20:50,578 � CLOSE YOUR EYES � 1276 01:20:50,580 --> 01:20:55,482 � WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME YOUR HAND � 1277 01:20:55,484 --> 01:20:58,686 � DO YOU FEEL MY HEART BEATIN' � 1278 01:20:58,688 --> 01:21:01,455 � DO YOU UNDERSTAND � 1279 01:21:01,457 --> 01:21:05,626 � BABY, DO YOU FEEL THE SAME � 1280 01:21:05,628 --> 01:21:09,997 � AM I ONLY DREAMING � 1281 01:21:09,999 --> 01:21:13,667 � OR IS THIS BURNIN' � � BURNIN' � 1282 01:21:13,669 --> 01:21:17,605 � AN ETERNAL FLAME � 1283 01:21:17,607 --> 01:21:19,940 � SAY MY NAME � � SAY MY NAME � 1284 01:21:19,942 --> 01:21:22,676 � THE SUN SHINES THROUGH THE RAIN � 1285 01:21:22,678 --> 01:21:26,013 � A WHOLE LIFE SO LONELY � 1286 01:21:26,015 --> 01:21:30,551 � AND THEN YOU COME AND EASE THE PAIN � 1287 01:21:30,553 --> 01:21:36,423 � I DON'T WANNA LOSE THIS FEELING � 1288 01:21:36,425 --> 01:21:38,893 � OHH � 1289 01:21:38,895 --> 01:21:40,494 GUITAR. 1290 01:21:43,900 --> 01:21:46,901 HOW ABOUT THE BAND? 1291 01:21:46,903 --> 01:21:49,904 BEAUTIFUL ON THE BASS. 1292 01:21:51,908 --> 01:21:53,908 � BURNIN' � 1293 01:21:56,212 --> 01:21:58,712 � CLOSE YOUR EYES � 1294 01:21:58,714 --> 01:22:02,783 � AND GIVE ME YOUR HAND, BABY � 1295 01:22:02,785 --> 01:22:07,121 � DO YOU FEEL MY HEART BEATING � 1296 01:22:07,123 --> 01:22:09,657 � DO YOU UNDERSTAND � 1297 01:22:09,659 --> 01:22:13,627 � DO YOU FEEL THE SAME � 1298 01:22:13,629 --> 01:22:18,332 � AM I ONLY DREAMING � 1299 01:22:18,334 --> 01:22:21,735 � OR IS THIS BURNING � 1300 01:22:21,737 --> 01:22:27,174 � AN ETERNAL FLAME �� 1301 01:24:11,580 --> 01:24:16,050 UH, IT'S OVER. B-BYE. [ All ] IT'S OVER. 149646

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