All language subtitles for La.theorie.du.K.O.S01E09.1080p.WEB-DL.DD+5.1.x264-SbR.1080p-NEXT

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Original subtitles

Ladies and gentlemen, now's the moment you've been waiting for!

The Incredible Hulk!

No, no!

I'll tell you my secret.

When I remove it from the stove, I add vanilla and some white chocolate.

And you stir?

No, I don't touch it. I just let it all cool down.

I take the pan and put it in cold water.

I should write it down.

Don't bother. I'll send you the recipe via email.

So, are we having a good night?

Say, Guy. I've been here for some time now.

You're happy with my work.

Let me stop you right there. You wanna ruin me?

I can't pay you more.

No, don't worry, it's not about that. It's just that...

I'm never the main event.

We can't this weekend. We have the Incredible Hulk.

That guy's internationally known, all the way to...

Trust me.

I didn't mean a specific night. It's been a while now...

And Christian's on tour, so I thought...

-maybe... -Uh, yeah.

I'm not good enough?

No, you are good enough.

But you're an acquired taste.

How can I explain it to you? If wrestlers were girls,

you wouldn't be a bombshell, not by any stretch.

But you'd be the kind of girl that we end up marrying...

unless that girl starts doing stuff that other girls don't.

Okay.

Oh, Titanic! Oh!

What was that?

Something other girls don't do.

I call it the Bulgarian Screwdriver.

Sounds like a wrestling lock.

It's similar.

That's it.

What?

Huracán Ramírez had the Huracánrana.

The Ultimate Warrior had his Gorilla Press Drop.

Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat had the Japanese Arm Drag.

Okay... so what?

I need my own combo. A signature move.

Well, yeah. That'd be cool.

In the meantime, should I show you my Turkish Trampoline?

Go for it.

-Okay? -Okay.

Hey.

What about me?

-I put it by the door. -But I live here.

I shouldn't have to go get it.

What's up?

Don't distract me. I have an essay due tomorrow and I haven't started yet.

Okay, okay.

Luckily, there's the internet. Copy...

and paste. Done.

Hey, wait a minute. Did you just plagiarize it?

So?

That's cheating. It's an unfair advantage over the others.

It's not an advantage, everyone does it.

But...

Who in the neighborhood has a dog?

Lots of people.

Someone's dumping dog poop in our garbage can.

-So? -So, I find it freaking disgusting.

It's no big deal. When you gotta go, you gotta go.

If it's no big deal, why don't they dump it elsewhere?

It doesn't bother you that they're trespassing?

The can was on the curb. The guy didn't come and dump the poop in our living room.

I'm sorry, but technically, the can is an extension of the house.

Just because you put it on city grounds doesn't make it public property, okay?

And the garbage truck had just come, in one week it'll stink like hell!

No, wait, wait!

Okay.

-Wow. What do you call that lock? -The Disco Hold.

And the winner is... Revenge Hébert!

Carl?

Carl, what if I told you that next Saturday,

you'll be the main event?

Seriously?

Write it down in your calendar, buddy.

-Thanks, Guy. -Hell yeah.

Hey, Christian. You're back from your American tour?

So it seems, yeah.

Did you see my fight?

Yeah, yeah. And that new lock of yours...

Yeah. Not bad, huh?

Nice.

There's just one thing, though. How should I put this?

That lock...

What?

It's mine.

It belongs to me.

That's a declaration of war.

I'm away for two weeks and I get stabbed in the back.

-I swear, I came up with that move. -Oh, yeah?

Then how do you explain that I did it in the States two weeks ago?

When?

-This? -It was in Detroit.

It's similar, but a couple of things are different.

-We got a copycat among us. -How could I have copied you?

-We never saw you do the Disco Hold. -"Disco Hold?"

-The name is Disco Super Slam, okay? -Oh, excuse me.

It's a technique I mastered so I could do the rotation with no hands.

I don't steal.

Sit down. Calm down, fellas.

Carl, change a few things to your move so it's different from Chris'.

That won't work. My body tells me to do it this way.

Make an effort.

But that's like taking the Moonwalk away from Michael Jackson.

Except this wrestling hold is my intellectual property. Okay?

Having "wrestling" and "intellectual" in the same sentence feels weird.

Well, now I know how Claude Robinson must've felt.

Who? Beard guy.

Oh, yeah. Okay.

-Here's your coffee. -Thanks.

I made you a sandwich, too.

That's nice of you.

Say, while I have you here...

Is it possible to film with this old thing?

Yeah.

Look. You press here and then you press there.

Then you press this button and this one,

and then this one.

-Got it? -Yes.

Are you staying all night?

I'll stay as long as it takes. I'll get proof in case we go to court.

Why keep watch from your car, though?

There's a reason cops do it from their cars.

What reason?

Because... they might have to chase the bad guy.

But your guy is clearly on foot, since he's walking his dog.

Look, Jonathan, I'm a security guard.

I know a thing or two about fighting crime.

Come on, let's go.

-You're upset. -No, I'm not.

Yes, you are.

Maybe a little.

You're really upset.

Yes, okay. What do you want me to say?

I did come up with that hold.

But it's also true that other people might have come up

with the same hold or similar ones.

Maybe. But we're talking about Christian Boisvert.

-He seemed really mad. -It's his job to pretend.

How would you feel, then?

I'm finally loved by the crowd. I don't want it to stop.

You're talking to yourself?

You're barely awake. You must still be dreaming.

Bingo.

Who's that woman?

Mrs. Lemieux. She lives around the corner.

Show me where.

-Okay. -Why, what did she do?

It's not what she did, it's what she did with it.

I told you, I don't want any trouble.

How do you think I feel?

What would you say if someone trespassed on your property?

If what's yours was taken away?

That reminds me of something.

Why the long face?

Your party wasn't fun?

No fun at all. Another girl was dressed just like me. That bitch.

It's just clothes.

No, it's not just clothes.

It's about my creativity, what makes me Jaimie Hébert.

How would you feel if someone took your deep self away from you? It's wrong.

And what about the essay you copied? The guy who wrote it was...

He just wrote it. He didn't have to shop around.

Plagiarizing things is no big deal, but another girl dressed like you is?

Wake up! It's 2014.

What's this about?

About what you do with your dog, ma'am.

-Which is? -Which is... this.

Just a sec.

Can I help?

-Are you trying to show me a picture? -No, a video.

A video?

Yes.

Okay. Go to Menu...

Right.

And then you have to push this button to...

-I see. -...play the video.

-Right, he told me. -See these icons? They're videos.

-There. -Got it. Thank you.

You're welcome.

-What? -What?

Do you see this? Look. You always dump it in our garbage can.

Of course I do. I'm not gonna leave it on the curb. I have manners.

In that case, why don't you take it with you?

Walking my dog doesn't mean I have to walk what comes out of him.

Good morning, sir.

Hi.

Are you Christian Boysvert?

Boisvert.

Boisvert. Do you work as a wrestler under the name Sugar Chris?

Want an autograph?

I'm Mordecai Simon, attorney at law.

Aaron Garfunkel, attorney at law.

We represent the Simon & Garfunkel law firm.

We've been hired by an American client who happens to be a wrestler, too.

You probably know him. Miracle Mark.

Barely.

It seems you've borrowed the technique that made him famous.

-The Disco Super Slam. -Um, no. I don't think so.

You see, that technique is our client's intellectual property.

When you borrow from someone else, you have to pay a copyright.

Okay, yes. But what if you change a thing or two and make it different?

-Mr. Boisvert... -Let's talk about this.

Miracle Mark suffered emotional harm, because of what you did to him.

-He wants to sue me? -He'd prefer to come to an agreement.

Sorry, I'm not familiar with legal jargon...

You'll likely get fleeced.

Okay, but... Okay. What if we can't reach an agreement?

Our client will deal with it in the most efficient manner.

How? He'll break my legs?

So... stop using our client's technique,

pay him $20,000 in damages, and we'll put it all behind us.

-Meaning... -Meaning I'm screwed.

You're starting to understand legal jargon.

Come on, let's go. There. Here we go. Come.

An eye for an eye for Mrs. Lemieux.

Don't worry, ma'am. We'll pick it all up and dump it in your can.

Okay? Go on, boy. Do your thing.

You can do it. You can do it.

-About the Disco Super Slam... -The Disco Hold?

Whatever. You can have it.

Oh, that's nice of you.

Yup. For 30,000 bucks.

-Excuse me? -Thirty grand.

You said I could have it.

Do you know how much it's worth?

You can freaking keep it, for that price.

Twenty-five. Can't go any lower.

Just keep your damn hold. I'll come up with a new one.

-Hulk. -Yeah?

-I tried the recipe you gave me. -And?

-I made a fool of myself. -How so?

-It was Ricardo's recipe. -Didn't I tell you?

And here I was, bragging it was mine.

Imagine how it made me feel.

I apologize. I'm sorry.

You'd better be.

He's right. He should've told him.

It's just a misunderstanding. It happens.

That reminds me of something that happened ages ago.

There was this girl, she used to do something to me.

A special technique she invented, supposedly.

Except at least three other girls started doing the same thing.

I knew damn well the Bulgarian Screwdriver wasn't her invention.

-If I were you, I'd ask. -Maybe.

You won't?

-I'm hesitating. -Why?

I don't wanna make her feel bad.

Right, that's gotta be why.

I don't wanna know where she learned to do that.

Fine. I don't want her to stop doing it.

-Are you okay? -Yeah, yeah.

Wow.

-So? -Wow.

Guess what I like most.

What?

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