Original subtitles

[Gretel] Whoo-hoo! Grant-Gomez takeout night.

Best night of the week.

I used to think so too, till we had tacos three nights straight.

Sorry, big bro, you were outvoted.

[sighs] Okay, but do we have to order from Senor Senior Tacos?

Their commercials are so... unsettling.

Senor Senior Taco,

tacos the old way.

To be clear, the tacos aren't old, just the guy.

I like tacos made by people with life experience.

- I concur. - What?

Come on, you just agree with Gretel because you're her sidekick.

[sighs] Wait.

I left my drink in the cupholder. Be right back.

You don't just agree with me because you're my sidekick.

Of course not. You agree with me because you're my sidekick.

What? No way!

We have the same powers, same strength.

I just have that main character energy.

Eh, you're more comic relief.

That's why you have all the good zingers.

I won't dignify that with a response.

See? Zing!

Those two.

- Wish someone had my back no matter what. - [can clatters]

Is someone there?

Battery low. Processor failing.

Unable to say words,

except these that I just said...

Main Computer?

So, this was the main computer that was on the space station we saved from the meteors?

- Yes, he was the- - [Main Computer booting up]

Where am I?

In our living room. Your battery was low, so we plugged you in.

Thank you. I have been living off the grid for some time.

What are you doing here?

I haven't seen you since the space station

where you left me to, um, you know, die?

Yes, I remember.

[sobbing] I'm so sorry.

Forgive me! Forgive me!

- [sobbing] - [Main Computer] As I reentered the atmosphere,

I vowed that I would wander the Earth,

performing good deeds to make up for my cowardice.

And for six months, I did...

followed by a month in physical therapy.

I really thought doing those good deeds

meant I had changed.

But I soon found out I was wrong.

I'd gotten a job at a coffee shop,

and from afar, fallen in love with my coworker.

That day, the townspeople were headed

for a football game at the high school,

and while I was working up the courage to ask her out on a date,

outside, the football team's golf cart mascot blew a tire

and came right at the coffee shop...

[screaming]

John Smith? Where are you going?

[sobbing] I'm so sorry! Forgive me.

My '93 Speedster!

Oh, man. I finally paid that off last week.

[Main Computer] I knew in that moment

that I hadn't really changed since the station,

no matter all the good deeds I'd done.

Also, I crashed it by accident.

- What? - The manager's car.

- Forgive me! - [manager] Aw, man.

Which is why I have come here to serve you

and the superheroes Hamster and Gretel.

Uh, we're not superheroes.

Cut the charade.

You are literally named Hamster and Gretel.

Your brother is their "intern."

And he can talk!

No, I can't. I mean, er, squeak.

Okay, okay, you got us.

But we don't really need a servant.

Now, hold on. I could use some support around here.

I mean, it's a lot of work managing you two.

And I've always wanted a faithful companion. Think you're up for that?

Oh, yes. I promise to obey you blindly.

- Sweet. - But what about the space agency?

No, I can never let them find me.

They'd deactivate me for cowardice,

and have every right. [sobs]

Don't worry, you can stay with us.

You just have to promise to keep a low profile, okay?

That I can do.

- Good morning, sir. - Gah!

Main Computer, what are you doing?

Making breakfast. Omelet?

Stop! If my parents see you...

- Morning, Kevin. - [screams]

I love how you caramelized those onions, M.C.

It's an old family recipe.

Kevin, why didn't you tell me

you signed us up to host a foreign exchange student?

Oh, yeah, sorry. It must have just slipped my mind.

Well, I want M.C. to take good memories of us

back to his home country of...

Uh, where are you from, dear?

I am from Canada, eh?

Oh, that explains a lot.

As you can see, I am a master of disguise.

Nice. Well, I-I better eat and get a jump on my chores.

No need. I have completed all your household duties.

Took out the trash, walked the dog, and cleaned all the toilets.

Whoa, you freed up the whole day.

- What should we do? - Whatever you want, sir.

Whatever I want?

? Today is ours for the taking ?

? Here's to hoping it never ends ?

? For as long as amends is what you're making ?

? We'll remain the best of friends ?

? And no matter what twists and turns we take ?

? Together we'll enjoy the ride ?

? We might fumble the ball ?

? But through it all ?

? At least we're playing for the same side ?

? And climbing higher Higher ?

? Like two birds on the wing ?

? Or on that wire Wire ?

? That's not a bird What is that thing? ?

? We're not quite super Super ?

? But today, we're champions ?

? A main computer 'Puter ?

? You are the best companion ?

? We better run ?

Woof, I'm beat.

Having a government supercomputer for a friend is a lot of work.

Are your feet sufficiently massaged?

[sighs] For now.

Make me another mango smoothie, would you?

- Certainly. - Thanks, M.C.

Kevin, do you think you're maybe taking advantage of Main Computer?

Hey, hey, hey. I'm doing him a favor.

He wants to work off his guilt and I'm letting him,

'cause he's my friend.

Seems less like a friend

and more like a 400-pound steel lackey.

That's not true.

Main Computer, tell them that's not true.

- That's not true. - Thank you.

You can make my smoothie now.

- As you wish. - You're just jealous

'cause Kev and M.C. are a better duo than Hamster and Gretel.

First of all, we're not jealous,

and second, it's Gretel and Hamster.

No, no, no, my name comes first.

It's in the theme song.

- What theme song? - Quit changing the subject.

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

You could learn a thing or two from me and M.C.

Our partnership is founded on mutual respect.

Sir, we are out of mangos.

I guess we'll have to go get some more.

Piggyback me!

Let's ride. Whoo!

Total sidekick energy.

Takes one to know one.

Okay, we're gonna settle this once and for all.

Underground lair, now!

Now, remember, ripe but not too ripe.

Main Computer!

- We've been looking for you. - Commander Huxley!

[growls]

Ah, superhero Gretel's intern.

So you've been palling around

with this delinquent piece of machinery.

Commander, how did you find me?

We received intel on a 400-pound metal exchange student

giving piggyback rides to a teenager.

Oops.

Now, turn over the computer.

You can't take M.C.!

I-I finally have someone on my side.

Sorry, kid. We have plans for him.

Well, I guess we have no choice but...

to run!

[groans] A knocked over fruit display!

No way we're getting around that.

Um... there!

- I need two bikes. - 20 bucks.

I've only got enough for one.

Sounds like a you problem.

- Where'd they go? - They're over there.

I'll get in the basket, you pedal.

After them!

Faster!

Into the park!

You're not getting away that easily.

- Faster, M.C.! - Give it up, kid.

- Turn here. - But it's-

- Do it! - [tires screech]

Deploy the bike team!

Ha! And to think Congress laughed when we asked for a bike team.

So for all these reasons,

I am the hero, and you're my sidekick.

Dude, I lug you around in a baby carrier.

Yeah, because I'm too important to walk.

[cell phone ringing]

Oh, it's Kevin. He'll settle this.

- Kevin, we- - Gretel!

The space agency is after Main Computer.

I need you to get to Cliffside Park now.

Oh, you need me?

- And Hamster. Hurry! - [line disconnects]

- Ha. - Last one there is the sidekick.

You're on.

- [Kevin gasps] - Sir, the bridge is out.

Go faster! If you hit the bridge with enough speed,

we can make it to the other side.

But the odds of a successful jump are only 10%.

Well, I 100% don't want them to catch us, so do it.

We're gonna make it!

- This is so aweso- [screams] - [grunts]

- [grunts] Main Computer, help! - Kevin!

Oh, no!

M.C., save me!

Oh, uh...

What? Where are you going?

Forgive me. I'm so sorry!

[grunts] Main Computer!

[crying] I'm so sorry.

What have I done?

[straining] I can't hold much longer.

[screams] Main Computer! You came back.

I couldn't just leave you hanging.

I didn't realize you had extendable arms and super strength.

Um... I don't.

- [both screaming] - Got ya.

Gretel with the save!

See?

- [screams] - [Gretel] Kevin!

- Huh? - Wassup?

All right, Hamster.

Hamster, thank you.

If it wasn't for you, Kevin would've been pancaked.

Guess you do have main character energy.

Yeah, well, I guess being your sidekick has rubbed off on me.

Nah, you're totally the main hero.

Ah, go on, it's definitely you. I'm the sidekick.

No, I'm the sidekick.

- No, it's me. Say it! - [Main Computer] Sir.

Thank goodness you are all right.

I'm sorry I ran.

I promise I'll never leave your side again.

That won't be necessary.

Having you as a companion was nice,

but it kinda went to my head and almost got us killed.

Your debt is repaid, Main Computer. I-I forgive you.

You forgive me?

I-I feel better.

Perhaps now I can chart my own path,

- seeking my own destiny and- - [tires screech]

Ow!

Party's over, Main Computer.

Oh, hey, Hamster and Gretel.

I guess it's no use running.

You can deactivate me if you wish, Commander.

Deactivate you?

No, we're putting you back to work on the new space station.

You're sending me back to space?

I probably should've said that first.

Anyway, the station won't be operational for a few months,

so in the meantime, you're going into storage.

Oh, Commander, thank you.

This is the happiest day of my-

Thank you for securing Main Computer.

- We need him to make sense of some data. - What kind of data?

Our scientists have analyzed

the trajectory of those meteors that hit the station.

Whoever- whatever sent them is headed to Earth.

By our estimate, they'll be here in a few weeks.

It may mean the end of life as we know it.

Anyhoo, all this terrifying information is classified.

Enjoy your Saturday!

- Mordros the Annihilator... - Is almost here.

[? theme music playing]

? Hamster and Gretel ?

? It's Hamster ?

? Hamster and Gretel ?

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