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Every hero's journey

starts with a tragic beginning.

Give me the cash
and make it fast.

Please don't hurt us.

Hey kid.

You ever dance with the
devil by the pale moonlight?

Jack.

See ya around, kid.

What?

This isn't Scott's origin story

Yes, it is.

It's clearly Batman's.

No, it isn't.

Scott's parents are still alive.

His dad's a plumber, I
met him, he's a nice guy.

We begin in the last days of
the majestic Monarch Theater,

but that's not really
what the story is about.

This is our hero.

- No.
- Oh man.

This is our hero, Scott Frakes.

Come on, Jon.

Pop culture fanatic,

comic book collector,
and going nowhere fast.

That's RJ.

All-county Magic the
Gathering champion

for three years running.

Little awkward with the ladies.

Ah, he'll figure it out.

Batman is the most manly
character of all time.

I mean, forget
Robin and all that.

Well, just Schumacher
messed it up.

I know that I saw
Clooney in suit nipples

and it made me
seriously question

the sexual
orientation of Batman.

That's
Ashley, former child star.

You remember the show.

♪ It's Ashley's World

♪ Ashley's World

That went up in
a ball of flames.

She's got her own way of
not dealing with things.

Don't tell me you didn't read
the tabloids, we all did.

Poor kid.

Batman sleeps with a
different woman in every movie.

He slept with Nicole
Kidman for god's sakes!

Come on, Ashley. Gabby
said not to antagonize him.

Gabby's the boss lady.

She inherited the
theater from her father,

but between you and me, I'm
not sure she really wants it.

She's not really
doing much right now.

Oh, here she comes.

And that is the difference
between character development

and production design.

So what if Batman were gay?

Huh?

I don't see anything
wrong with it.

Okay, well, let me ask you this.

Are you of the belief
that Higgins was really Robin Masters?

Um, Robin Masters, is that
the one after Dick Grayson?

You are killing me.

Magnum PI?

It had one of the '80s
most handsome men.

Think his power was
in his mustache.

- Tom Selleck.
- Oh.

You are such a nerd.

I prefer to think of myself

as an expert on
alternative media.

Okay.

Oh yeah.

You know, they really
don't make enough

TV shows and movies
about robots nowadays.

What about Terminator
and the Transformers?

Ooh and Wall-E.

Wall-E's alright
but I am talking about

one of the greatest
animated movies of all time,

Iron Giant.

I mean Vin Diesel as a robot?

Best casting ever.

But since it occurred
in the era of Pixar

it was like it
never even happened.

And RJ, the
Terminator franchise?

In my opinion, nothing but a
shell of its former great self.

And don't even get me started
on the new Transformers.

The cartoons are the only
thing you need to watch.

Oh but back in the '80s
it was a glorious Mecca

of robotics.

Short Circuit, Robocop,
Terminator, Runaways,

Last Starfighter,
Flight of the Navigator,

Data in the good Star Trek,
don't ever forget that.

Ah there was also Rocky IV,

Screech's robot in
Saved by the Bell,

Empire, Jedi, Tron.

Oh, well sort of.

There was also the Cylons
on Battlestar Galactica,

Knight Rider, Not Quite Human.

The syndicated sitcom
about the kid robot.

- Small Wonder.
- Yes, thank you.

Hey, there I am.

I looked pretty
good before I died.

Oh, sorry, spoiler alert, I die

You know what?

Forget I said
anything about that.

I've been a projectionist
at this theater

since I was a teenager and
I've probably seen more movies

than you can even name.

In Magnum P.I., was Higgins
really Robin Masters?

No.

So you know when they open?

Oh my god, so sorry I'm
late on my first week.

It's just my brother's baby,
it was up all night crying.

Not so much crying as shrieking

at ear-shattering frequencies.

So, this is Kira.

We're still trying
to figure her out.

And I'm rushing out,
I'm rushing out the door

'cause this is important to me

and it puked all over my
shirt and I was like how,

how is that possible?

How can you cry, scream,
and projectile vomit

all at the same time,
you stupid baby?

That I love so freaking much?

I vow on the lives of
my three nephews okay

that I will never be late again.

At least the baby you can,
you know, if I'm late.

So, any idea when they open?

One week from today.

Like we need another one
of those around here.

All money, no substance.

The lemmings who go there
are just missing out

on classic film storytelling

and the superior,
personal service

given by those of us
who excel in the art

of picture show playhouses.

Uh, Scott.

Yeah.

Really, you really don't
think he was Robin Masters?

- No.
- Okay.

- If you look closely--
- No!

Now that
you've met the concessionaires,

let's head across the
street to Fisk Theaters.

And Derek.

Idiots.

Derek is Scott's arch nemesis,

although Scott
doesn't know it yet.

We're Monarch Theaters.

We show old movies
on one screen.

We're Fisk Theaters,
we show sequels

and we're coming to kill ya!

- Boom!
- Derek.

Derek, come over here.

What were you saying?

Nothing, Father.

Who were you talking to?

Who's he talking to?

I was just thinking
out loud how I could make

this theater the very
best place it could be.

Ah.

Good answer, my boy.

Now, what about that
side project I asked for?

It will be taken
care of before we open.

That's good.

Do well.

Sky's the limit.

Soon I will have my revenge.

Rosebud.

- Hey, aren't you Ash--
- Shut up.

Can I have your autograph?

No.

Don't do that.

Still drunk?

Maybe, I got pretty
wasted last night.

Don't judge me!

What'd you do last night?

You watch the Last Starfighters
for like the 300th time?

Starfighter, singular,
that's why he's the last one,

and actually no.

- Really?
- Really.

Maybe you don't know me as
well as you think you do.

Video games.

I'm just not a club
or bar kind of guy.

You go to sports bars!

They show wrestling.

Okay.

Oh Scott, I hope
things never change.

Here's lookin' at you, Ashley.

What?

You're the last one here?

Does it even matter?

No, it's just usually you're--

Where's Kira and RJ?

Cleaning the theater.

So they didn't clean it
after closing last night.

No, I let them go home early.

Gabs I think there's
some mail for you.

What is it?

Nothing.

It looks important.

It's not.

Oh yes.

So what do we have today?

You know, I still don't get
the fascination with the trash.

Because we find
really cool stuff.

Mm hmm.

- Like we're Indiana Jones.
- And Short Round.

Yeah and like temple
of the weird crap

that people live
in movie theaters.

That I'd love to
see on a marquee.

I think this is
gonna make you smile.

Oh.

Awesome.

Why on earth would someone
leave that in a movie theater?

Oh, Prince of
Thieves soundtrack?

Oh that's why.

What's in the box?

It's a cooler full of lobsters.

It's not full if you ask me.

There's just two.

What kind of person leaves
a cooler full of lobsters

and just goes away?

That's not even the
weirdest stuff we've found.

Here you are.

They don't sell
cashews by the gallon.

Someone needed a funnel
to put 'em in there.

It doesn't make any sense!

You don't make any sense.

Scott Frakes.

You old SOB.

I haven't seen you
in what, 10 years?

Yeah, god, it's been like,

I can't even imagine what the,

interesting placement of
your dad's new theater.

Oh yeah, that.

We just figured it
was an ideal spot

since there's no
competition in the area.

You know, location,
location, location.

God, only 10 years?

You look really, did
they fix your meds?

It's that kind of
mentality that keeps you

as a lowly clerk boy
whereas men like me--

Have make-believe jobs
working for your daddy.

Yeah you keep
thinking that, Frakes.

But it's my
resentment of Father,

that's what's made me
into the man I am today.

Sweetheart.

Fetch me a cola.

I need a cup with
three cubes of ice.

This is a Jackson.

You can keep the change.

Oh, thanks.

And douche.

Miss me?

Derek, I already told
you I'm not selling.

Whoa.

Let me sweep you off your feet.

I'm not comfortable with that.

This is business, princess.

You gotta take care of yourself.

He is so creepy.

Every time he looks at me I
feel like I need a rape shower.

What do you think
he was doing here?

Who cares?

I'm gonna have to smudge
the shit out of this theater

again when he leaves.

I can't stand that guy!

Look we both know you need me.

Give me a couple
days to think about it.

Of course, that's all
you have because once

we open our doors you'll
be out of business anyway.

Ah!

Win-win.

Did you feel that?

That's the beginning
of a new era.

I'd love for you to join me.

She's broke.

Hello?

Fanny pack guy?

Why don't you head
for the hills?

Are you kidding?

I have such a crush on this man.

- Hey guys.
- Hi.

Nice shirt.

Ashley, how's my bosom buddy?

That's a 1980s TV reference
starring Tom Hanks and...

I dunno, some other guy.

Peter Scolari.

Buddies, is that all
we are for each other?

Hey man, whatcha reading today?

Is that Batman?

Nope.

I don't know about that.

Looks like Batman.

I'm pretty sure you're
gonna wanna check that.

Could be one of those
episodes where he's

out of the costume.

They're called issues.

It's a good point, Scott.

He's probably right
about that episode.

Do you want one for the matinee?

Just one moment.

My precious.

Here you go.

That is some lucky chapstick.

Some call me a bad boy.

Where's Kira?

Kira's working.

Yeah she is.

Go get her, tiger.

Tiger says rawr.

I'm allergic to cats.

Bless you.

How do you do that?

What?

Fake being someone's friend?

It's the one sociopathic
quality of yours

I actually admire.

Thanks, I can't help it.

It just kind of flows out of me.

You share that with Dahmer.

♪ Concession stand
is where it's at ♪

♪ Snacks ♪

Popcorn.

Sure.

Don't be stingy with the butter

like you are with the customers.

Oh I'm not, I'm not--

Like I am then.

You okay?

I don't pay you guys
to just stand around.

Technically you do, I mean,

that's the nature of
concessions and box office

is we sit here and
wait for people

and there's not many customers--

You know what?

Staff meeting, in
the theater, now.

Attention everyone!

We'll be opening the
house in like a minute.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

Guys, guys.

You don't understand
about robots though.

Guys, guys!

Guys!

Guys!

I think you should just

listen to him about robots.

Concessionaires assemble.

Yeah, exactly.

I think I'm selling
the theater to Derek.

Holy shit I knew it.

You can't do that!

I can't lose this job.

There are four people
in the lobby, four!

I wanted to keep it the
way my dad had it but

it's just not working.

I kept asking you
if things were okay,

why didn't you tell me?

I could have done
something to help out.

Jon, you don't have the
money to make this work.

You don't just throw
money at things to fix them.

What are you
talking about, Gabby?

Fisk is just gonna turn
this into another one

of their crap palaces.

No, they won't.

They're opening a new
facility up the street.

They don't need us anymore.

They're gonna close down
the Monarch for good.

It doesn't matter.

Once they open we'll be
out of business anyway.

No, that's not true.

We have entirely
different audiences.

If anything, their theater
opening will drive business

- our way.
- Yep.

This place means
a lot to people.

He's right.

So I can hope you're
right and then we double

our ticket sales to what,
eight per screening?

Really my only options
are lose everything

or sell to Derek and
actually get something.

Come on.

I say we at least
put up a fight.

- Right guys?
- Right.

- Yeah.
- Yep.

What about raising
the ticket prices?

I have to sign the
day before they open.

Perfect!

So you're saying there's time.

I suppose I could
stall a little...

Challenge accepted!

We won't hold our breath.

So Jon, is Willow ready to go?

I'm sorry.

Let's get this place
cleaned up, guys.

- Yeah great.
- I'm on it!

Hey.

Oh thanks Scott!

Yep.

What?

Well what are you gonna do?

The theater's gonna close.

Never tell me the odds.

I need to go juggle
a monkey up top.

Oh god, it sounded like

you were gonna blow
a guy for crack.

I'm just not that
exciting anymore.

Do you want me to take
these tapes to the dumpster?

No, they deserve
a viking funeral.

Cool.

I wish.

I lost my virginity
to that song.

Gross.

Isn't it bad for
the environment for you to be burning

all that stuff?

Most definitely.

It's probably not good for
us to have the hot dogs

cooking next to it either,
but I'm always hoping

it's something like this that's
gonna give me my superpower.

It's a perfectly
reasonable origin story.

Boom, see?

I mean, hell, there's one
with a Nazi war criminal

who escapes to South America
where he was devoured

by mutant killer bees.

Became a being composed
entirely of bees.

He was a bad guy.

You are taking this
surprisingly well.

Well, died a long time ago, so.

No, I mean about the theater.

Oh god, no, I'm not
taking that as well.

You know sometimes it
takes a drastic event

to provoke action.

Pa Kent had to die
before Clark went

to the Fortress of Solitude
and embraced his destiny

as a hero.

Who's Clark Kent
in this scenario?

- Gabby.
- Me.

Scott.

You're avoiding reality.

Hey.

What're you doing?

Avoiding reality.

It's a CBQ.

Cool.

Oh look, Hanson.

How did Derek even
find out about this?

He must have
sensed a disturbance.

You ever notice how
Derek sounds like Dalek?

So what do you guys
think that she's gonna do?

I just know that I'd
rather burn this theater

down to the ground
with me inside it

then let Derek have it.

That's a little
dramatic, isn't it?

Was it dramatic when
Morpheus armed the EMP

at the end of the Matrix?

When Kirk blew up the Enterprise

to incinerate a few Klingons?

When Pee Wee saved all the
animals from the pet shop fire?

Lil bit.

Whatever.

I would be worried if I
thought that you were serious

and that you were actually
going to follow through

with anything, but
I'm not concerned.

Okay, bye guys, it's been fun.

Wait Ashley, let's
hang out together.

Serious, you're not serious?

You know I think I would
have went with the moment

where Ripley blows
up the Nostromo

just to kill the
one single alien.

Damnit!

In every movie theater

you have these kids.

Hell, I used to be one of them.

Kids.

Oh.

Is this an R rated movie?

What if we show
every superhero movie

starting with Superman
and the Mole Men

and then working our
way towards the present?

- That's a good idea.
- Yeah.

But you're gonna
get distracted before you even start it.

What?

No, I won't.

Yeah, you're right, I
don't know you at all.

So you agree.

Excuse me, concessionaires?

Matt, I thought I told
you guys no more costumes

in the theater.

The whole codpiece
debacle during Labryinth

was the last straw.

But I like it.

We're just trying to add
some ambiance to this dump.

Nice one Billy Ray.

We'll have two drinks,
one large ranch soda,

one small buffalo wing soda,
and an extra medium cup of ice.

You know the saying, no
shirt, no shoes, a cape,

no service.

Ashley!

But this is not a
cape, this is a cloak.

Well whatever it is
it's gotta come off.

We can't have D and
D warfare in here.

We don't want to anger
the wrong type of cleric.

Unfortunately for you,
I fight my own battles.

Dude, I am not in the mood
to deal with you right now.

Ashley!

Thank you Mr. Fuji.

Thank you.

- Billy, Billy Ray!
- That's my dice arm!

Billy Ray!

Dropped your tribble.

Wait til later.

There you go.

I shall have my
revenge, concessionaires!

Frakes!

Frakes?

Scott Frakes?

No, Jonathon.

Of course Scott.

We have a common enemy.

There's nothing
common about our enemy.

Would you like to aid in the
destruction of Scott Frakes

and that shithole
theater he works in?

Join me.

Haven't seen Doug around
the comic shop for a while.

Phantom Zone's not
the same without him.

Yeah, I mean he's had a
baby and he has a toddler,

keeps him pretty busy.

He did not waste any
time after high school.

Yeah well I mean
you guys did graduate

like 10 years ago so...

I mean yeah, no no no, he just
like totally rushed into it.

This is what I'm saying.

Do you think that they're
really gonna close down

the theater 'cause I
really need this job.

It's more than just a job, Kira.

Yeah it is, it is a way
of being, but it is a job

that pays money
and that is good.

Oh, this is the girl.

Oh Heather?

She's too good for me though.

We seem to be made to suffer,
that's our lot in life.

Theater's closing, kid.

We ran out of chances.

Hi RJ.

Hi Heather.

Oh, what, is it time?

Yep, gonna...

So, can I help
you with anything?

Uh yeah, can I have a
cherries and cream soda

and a small popcorn?

Sure.

Here's your popcorn.

So.

You're here to see Willow.

Yeah, I used to watch it

all the time with
my older brother.

"Don't call me a peck!"

I didn't call--

Oh, you're quoting the movie.

Help me.

You know if you're not
doing anything later then

I was thinking maybe you
could come and sit with me?

Unclog toilets
need to someone poop.

Um... okay then.

Unclog toilets?

Anything else would have
been sexier than that.

RJ.

I just froze up.

Holy shit that was brutal.

I just don't know what to say.

Well this won't do.

Okay, homework assignment.

Watch as many smooth
guy movies as possible

start Casablanca and
Top Gun and pepper in

anything Cary Grant.

Oh I love the way they
talk in Princess Bride.

Yeah, and Shaft, 'cause
Shaft is one bad-ass mother--

Shaft, got it.

You need to just accept
the theater is being sold.

Really?

When the world's
being a bitch sometimes

I like to let out a good scream.

Like Ned 18 at the end
of The Phantom Menace.

Because it was well, you
know, the Phantom Menace.

When Old Yeller died.

Been doing it my whole life.

I get it, you scream
a lot at movies.

Not just at movies.

There was also the
day that Batman died.

Batman died?

Not really, he was
just lost in time,

but I didn't know that then.

Screaming seems to help.

I just think Gabby's
being selfish.

Don't you dare
accuse her of that.

Do you have any idea
how exhausting it is

to fight a constant uphill
battle for your dreams?

Do you?

Well you've seen movies
where people have,

so picture that.

I don't know what's worse,
never getting your dream

or getting it and losing
it in the most mortifying,

soul-crushing way.

We're not talking
about Gabby anymore.

No.

You know I think you
should let out a good scream.

Come on.

No, really, come on, go for it.

See?

There you go.

There you go.

Let it all out.

There's a lot in there.

I can tell.

I always thought that by
the time I was near 30,

I would be doing something
different with my life

then I was doing at 18
and at 13 and at six.

What do you wanna do then?

I don't know.

I can tell you who Zorn
from the X-Men really was

but real life, not
my area of expertise.

Hell, Wolverine, Superman,
McClane, Riggs, Terminator.

They were all there for me.

Some people in my life weren't.

I can see them.

I know them better
than I know myself.

That was almost philosophical.

Everything I needed to know
about life I learned at six.

You can't make a
living doing that, so.

What about you?

I have no idea.

I guess I just wish
I could start over.

So do all who live
to see such times.

But that is not
for them to decide.

All we have to
decide is what to do

with the time that is given us.

Gandhi?

Gandalf.

I thought you might
start seeing things my way.

I guess the price is right.

So come on down!

Now before we handle the
matter of your payment

I do have a few tiny little
errands for you, okay?

Hey, Larry.

Excelsior, Scott.

I was just talking about you.

You're never gonna
guess who showed up.

Derek.

How'd you know?

My scar started to hurt.

What the hell is that?

Well I'm finally retiring.

I owe my wife a trip to
Hawaii for like 30 years.

Holy cow.

I mean it's great, you
know, you deserve it,

but where am I gonna
get my books every week?

Well you could always
try Android's Lair.

Gross, they don't
even alphabetize.

Anyway, do you know
the going market price

on Silver Age stuff?

Well, what do you got?

A few first appearances.

I need the cash.

Are these the ones that
your grandfather gave you?

Yeah, but he just
thought they were fun.

He never really paid attention
to how much they were worth.

Yeah well things are only
worth the value we put on 'em.

I mean, fun's a
pretty high value.

Yeah.

Yeah there's a pretty
decent market these days.

All the guys who were
reading those as kids

are getting ready
for retirement.

I mean I can definitely
put the word out.

How much do you want for 'em?

Oh god.

I don't know.

Some of 'em are
worth a lot, so...

Scotty, are you sure
you wanna part with these?

Yeah.

Look, if somebody's interested

just tell them to find
me at the theater.

If the price is
right, I'll sell 'em.

If not, maybe not.

I'm just trying to
explore my options.

Okay.

Magic tournament in back.

Newbies?

- Mm hmm.
- It's on.

Why do you think we're
always the first to arrive?

Because it's summer
break and we have no lives.

We could go out and party
and get wasted if we wanted to.

So be like Ashley?

Yeah.

Why are you eating
stale popcorn?

Free lunch, and dinner.

Also a good source of fiber.

Greetings, true believers.

Come on in.

Oh hey, clean out the theater
before Gabby gets here.

Kids.

How did you know
we would be here?

Dude I was your
age once, I get it.

Sneaking into an R rated movie,

it's like a rite of passage.

First you're just excited
'cause you're doing something

you're not supposed to be doing,

you're hoping to catch a
glimpse of some boobies

or something but you're
coming to realize

it's not about the
rating, it's about seeing

a real movie in a
real movie theater.

Sitting alone in the
dark with your popcorn,

sharing an experience with
a room full of people.

Maybe the seat's broken, maybe
the floor's a little sticky,

but when those coming
attractions come on

and the lights go down, none
of that matters anymore.

You're instantly
transported to another time,

another country, another world.

It's magic.

It's magic that fills the
screen, it fills the theater.

It just fills your soul.

It's magic, man.

So yeah, I get it.

Dude.

I just wanna see boobies.

I like what he said.

What you said, it sounds cool.

Alright well Clockwork
Orange is a little too advanced

for you, but come back at
eight for Jaws, it's on me.

Thanks so much, sir.

Sir.

Why so serious?

There's not much in there today.

I wish I could find stuff I
could pawn, that would be cool.

Well I got the only
cool thing today.

Why, what did you, what?

Where does that even,
wait, does that fit you?

Probably?

Put it on.

I have an idea.

Is this racist?

This feels a little racist.

It's definitely not not racist.

How much you make?

Hundred bucks.

$150 in damage.

I'm going to tear
them apart from within.

If I may ask, my liege.

Why do you plan on
destroying the theater?

Yeah, I mean it's
a pretty cool place.

I mean aside from Frakes.

Frakes!

Frakes is reason enough.

Anything he cares
about, I must destroy.

He must suffer until
his last breath!

Give this to our mole.

He's a little
over-dramatic, isn't he?

I mean he doesn't really
want us to kill him, does he?

- No, of course not.
- Oh good.

He's gonna reserve
that for himself.

That was amazing.

Did you like it?

I did, I actually did.

It reminded me so much of--

How could you?

What the hell
are you doing in here?

Father.

Why did I bother giving you
a corner office with windows?

How do you get any
work done in the dark?

The light hurts my eyes.

I'm meeting with the owner
of the Monarch Theater

to discuss our offer.

Just do what needs to be done.

And turn on a goddamn light.

Of course, Father.

Old fool.

He knows nothing of power!

And love.

Rosebud.

Did you really start
keeping a tabloid scrapbook?

Yeah, my therapist said
it would be a terrible idea

which is why I'm doing it.

Yeah, I always recommend
pointedly defying someone

who specialized
in mental health.

Yeah, me too.

Really helps heal over
that adolescent scar tissue.

I know you don't like
to talk about it.

For what it's worth,
I think it's shit

that he didn't get any backlash.

He was the adult, not to
mention the married one.

Troubled slutty teenage star
is a much more interesting

headline than adulterous
has-been TV dad.

So that's it?

I dunno, maybe do a web-series.

Okay, community theater?

Theme park.

Porn, theme park porn!

Do monologues, be
Derek's personal jester.

All of the things
that I have said

involve public performances.

I will murder you.

I know.

Hey.

So what's the plan?

I don't have a plan.

I am without plan,
I am planless.

Maybe it's better this way,

this way it's out of my hands.

It's like destiny.

What's after Jaws,
Teen Wolf right?

Nope, Harold and Maude.

Something wrong with
the Teen Wolf print

so that is not gonna work out.

What happened?

Maybe Teen Wolf decided to
let destiny run its course

so that way it didn't have to
make any decisions on its own.

Maybe Teen Wolf didn't
know what it wanted.

Well maybe Teen Wolf should
have had a conversation

with the other movies
before it got too late.

Because now it's not
just about Teen Wolf,

it's messing
everybody else up too.

That's not true!

Teen Wolf and the other
classics will find

other places to play.

That's not the point.

Teen Wolf and the other
movies had a home here!

It's as much theirs
as it is yours.

Its, alright, you should
have consulted them

before deciding the
fate of their home.

Jon, I'm sorry.

Don't apologize to me!

Apologize to Teen Wolf.

I don't even know what
I'm talking about anymore!

Look, I've made my
choices, I'm good.

Come up with a plan,
Gabby, be with a plan.

Be planful.

I should have sold this
place as soon as I got it.

Well why didn't you?

I get it.

Movies were how I
connected with my dad too.

Yeah.

My dad died of a heart
attack when I was younger,

but even before then we never
really had much in common

except we both loved
old silent comedies.

Chaplin, Lloyd, Buster Keaton.

Those characters in those
movies, they just went for it.

And even when they failed it
just made it a better movie.

I think it's because
they failed so miserably,

that's why we cheer for
them so hard in the end.

Look Gabby, don't
wait for someone else

to give you the answers,
especially not me.

You don't need to
listen to anyone else.

Unless of course it's Hal Ashby.

Reach out, take a
chance, get hurt even

but play as hard as you can.

Or else you got nothing to
talk about in the locker room.

At ease.

My two favorite customers.

Got something for you, Scotty.

Wait, no, don't you
have kids or grandkids?

They don't like comic books.

That's the heartbreaker.

Tell you what.

On the house.

Thank you, but we can't.

Comics for food, it's like
the old days of bartering.

We're not that old, but
I'll take them anyone.

Ray.

Would you please let me get
something for free once woman?

Enjoy the movie.

That was really sweet.

You're great with the customers.

Yeah, some of them.

But a bunch of them I just
want to hit in the face

with a pick ax.

Oh, are your chocolate
raisins 70% cacao?

And he's like wa wa wa!

What do you mean you're
screening L'Avventura

with the English subtitles?

I mean how are we supposed
to focus on the symbolism

of the camera movements
and the allegories

if we're too busy
reading subtitles?

Hi, I have a free popcorn,
no wait, that's a car wash.

And then he goes to do
this jump kick and whoop!

You guys take PayPal?

When are you guys
gonna show Navy SEALS?

We need to see some man meat.

Why can't we just
get a normal soda?

Take your shirt off.

And your pants.

How dark does it
get in the theaters?

You people need to
change the rating on

Passion of the Christ, Jesus
Christ gettin' his skin

flayed off for our
salvation is just what

these bad ass kids
need to see today.

Do you know how to tie
a tourniquet by chance?

Your job's not that hard,
you work at a movie theater!

Oh no.

She's just passed out, right?

Kira.

Wish we weren't
getting so good at this.

Shame there's no "friend of junkie"
Olympics, we'd take gold.

- On your three.
- Three.

She's not a junkie.

Gabs, do I really
need to be the asshole

and point out how bad she is?

Well maybe we can get her on
one of those reality shows

for child stars and get America
to vote for her or whatever.

No, she just
took some medication

that didn't agree with her.

Not on black tar heroin
yet, but come on, look at her.

She's not dealing.

And I'm not an expert
at customer service,

but she passed out in
front of the customers.

One, two, three.

Not to mention our
impressionable employees.

They don't even notice.

Then you're not
paying attention.

I'm worried about her.

You need to talk to her.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Hey I'm so excited that
you guys are so in love

but just try to
keep it PG in there.

I'm warning you two.

It's just that this
theater has some really

unusual policies, so.

Why don't you mind your
own business, Twilight?

Okay well thank you
for making that so easy.

Hey is everything okay?

I'm really worried about her.

She'll be okay in a little bit.

Oh hey Scott there's
a guy in a suit

that's looking for you.

Are you Mr. Scott Frakes?

I am.

Are you here to recruit
me for S.H.I.E.L.D.?

Do I look like Dum
Dum Dugan to you?

Nice.

And yeah, kind of actually.

What's this about?

I been told you have
something for sale.

Yes.

Would you like to
see the merchandise?

Very much.

What was Batman's
first weapon of choice?

Gun.

Batman's first city?

New York.

Why did Jason Todd die?

Joker killed him.

That's how, not why.

You know what?

Never mind.

You sure?

I can make it worth your while.

I'm sure you can.

I just can't do it.

Very well.

What do you dork wads want?

Ooh, a Snickers.

Vengeance.

I've told you a million times,

we're never gonna play hentai.

Ooh, what's hentai?

- Animated tentacle rape.
- What?

Someone should put a
muzzle on you, you rabid dog!

There's more decency across
the street at Fisk Cinema!

- Yeah Fisk!
- Someone get

this walking
billboard out of here?

Two tickets please.

Nope.

Um, that'll be $16.

What's that?

An offer you can't refuse.

I was gonna say that!

It's an offer you can't refuse.

More raspy.

It's an offer you can't refuse.

No don't don't that is
not, boundaries, bubble.

Did I miss anything exciting?

We've got a G
rated movie playing

and this young couple steaming
it up NC-17 style down there.

What are you gonna do
when the theater closes?

I don't know.

We're one of the only theaters
I know of still using film

and even we use digital
more often than not.

I mean this job used to be
an art form, it was a craft.

Now Kodak went bankrupt and
movies are all ones and zeroes.

A 14 year old could do
my job better than I can.

Oh, yeah.

So you and Ashley connect?

Oh.

I'd like to stay clap free.

Dude she's great
and you know it.

You gotta lock that down.

What?

Lock that down,
isn't that the phrase?

Not even, no.

You gotta lock that
shit down like, you gotta,

if you like the thing maybe
you should put the ring

- on the fing.
- No, no no, no.

No, no?

Look, coming from someone
who is you plus a few years,

don't let the girl get by you.

Ooh, did some little
filly break your heart?

It wasn't Frieda Felcher
but yeah, it was a while a go.

Well if it makes you
feel better this theater's

kinda like your mistress

And we're your bastard family.

Dude.

You gotta make a move.

I don't even think
that she would want--

No I'm not just
talking about her.

You gotta find your thing.

It doesn't matter if
it's saving this theater

or dating Ashley or
building a robot.

Find your thing and go for it.

What about you?

Oh me?

I'm screwed.

No, you...

You just got finished telling
me how you don't even know

how you would move on and then

you're getting on me about it?

Dude I am about as
relevant as what is inside

that film canister, but
I'm not gonna wallow in it.

I gotta figure it
out, so do you.

Gotta find your thing, man.

You know what my
thing is right now?

Messing with those kids.

Ooh I want the red one.

Red one sucks, bad
arc, take the blue.

Thanks Scott.

RJ.

Thanks.

So we doing the
swat or the bullrush?

Swat.

On your six.

Concessionaires, roll out.

Twilight this, Twilight this!

Break it up.

Woo!

I'm gonna tell
your manager, man.

That'd be me.

Come on, I heard the
theater across the street

is better anyway.

It'd be cheaper to rent
a hotel room for an hour.

Sorry everybody.

Enjoy the show.

Oh god, that was great.

Remember how many
teenagers we got

when we were screening
The Notebook?

Jon.

Someone call an ambulance!

Something's wrong with Jon!

So there it is.

Told ya I died.

Jon!

Congenital
heart defect, same as my dad.

Guess I had it all my life.

Roll credits.

I don't even know what to say.

I've known Jon a long time.

He was like a...

He was my friend.

He did not feel the sacrifice
a vain or empty one.

And we will not debate
his profound wisdom

at these proceedings.

Of my friend, I
can only say this.

Of all the souls I have
encountered in my travels,

his was the most... human.

Goodbye old friend.

Gabby, do the deal with Derek.

We're done here.

Think I'm doing the right thing?

If it makes you happy then yes.

That's what I keep
on telling myself.

Then keep doing that.

And then what?

Then the bucket list.

Taj Mahal,
Colosseum, Zihuatenejo.

I don't know that one.

You know it's the
place where Tim Robbins

and Morgan Freeman meet
at the end of Shawshank.

That place looked
like heaven to me.

That's a really good one.

I don't know, I just
wanna leave and not know

where the next day
is gonna take me.

Like the Incredible Hulk.

You've been spending
too much time with Scott.

Tell me about it.

You like him.

Doubtful.

You do.

It's like back in the day
when you were obsessed

with Tim Daly from Wings.

Tim Daly.

Scott's a good guy,
he might surprise you.

The only thing that surprises me

is how obnoxious he is.

Whatever you say.

Tim Daly.

Come out, come out,
wherever you are.

- Hey.
- Whoa.

Charming spot you picked here.

So I wanted to talk with you.

Okay.

You've been really
nice to me and now that

with everything that
just happened with Jon,

I've just been thinking that
I don't wanna do this anymore.

You don't wanna do...

You don't wanna be a hero
for your family anymore?

You don't wanna
swoop in from the sky

and save the house for Doug?

I mean, you've only known
these guys a couple of weeks.

I thought family
came first for you.

You know I can see you're in
a tough spot so no problem.

- Oh, really?
- Yeah.

Oh that's great.

You are not as terrible
as everybody says you are.

So sweet of you.

Everybody says you're the worst.

But you're, like
smarmy and, you're not.

What a great guy.

Thank you.

So just get me the money
back and we're square.

Okay well I don't
have all of it right now

but I can get you some of it.

You don't have my money anymore?

You wanna be released from
our contractual obligation

but you don't have my money?

How did you think this
was going to work?

I don't have all of it.

So you jumped in your Datsun
tonight and drove over here

underneath a freeway to
meet me thinking you were

just gonna say "I'm out and I
wouldn't want the money back?"

- No.
- I can pay installments.

No.

Did you ever take like an
economics class or maybe

read a book?

You can't just back out of it!

So if I tell you to plant a
bug in your friend's theater,

you put a bug.

If I tell you to go get
me a sandwich you say

how much mustard.

This is how it works.

Do you understand?

I own you.

Scott!

- Hey Frakes, Frakes, Mr. Frakes
- Hey, hi Scott!

Hey just wanted to thank you
for taking care of my sister.

It's really great.

Yeah I thought you'd
have a family by now.

Don't wanna end up like
that old guy at the theater.

You have really nice hair.

You look good.

You don't wanna end up like
that old guy at the theater.

I don't understand your shirt.

Is that a person?

I thought you'd
have a family by now.

You'll be okay.

Don't wanna end up like
that old guy at the theater.

Nice hair.

You don't wanna end
up like that Jon guy.

Fisk Cinema opening in two days!

Two days!
Brand new state of the art!

Hey Scotty.

Jeez Grandpa.

You're like a ninja.

Oh.

Tell me, did you go out
with your friends today?

No, I didn't feel like it.

What's that?

Oh just something
I wanted you to have.

Whoa.

Shouldn't these be
in bags and boards?

Well if they were
I couldn't read them.

I can't take these.

These are special.

Oh these comics
are very special.

But the real story is
how I got them signed.

- Did I ever tell you--
- A few times.

Well, Gil and I,
you know, Gil ended up

being the best
man at my wedding.

We heard they were doing a
signing down at the store

so we came up with a plan.

State of the art!

This isn't your
grandfather's theater.

Make sure the story of your life

is worth telling.

Thanks.

What's going on here?

Needed to make a change.

By selling all your stuff?

You love your comics.

I realized there's
more to life than that.

Such as?

I ran into Doug and his family.

Doting husband, the loving
wife, gaggle of kids.

My god, I don't want that.

This is what I
want, this theater.

And I'm gonna save it.

Excuse me.

So I see you're really doing it.

Hope it's not too late.

Take it easy, night owl.

Hey.

Holy moly.

You've got the debuts of
Spiderman and the X-Men?

Silver Age versions of
Flash and the Green Lantern?

Oh my stars and garters.

That's the first
appearance of Joker.

Are you sure you wanna do this?

I mean they were your
grandfather's legacy.

No.

Those aren't his legacy.

He loved comics and that
got me started on comics

and that's a gift
that keeps on giving.

I need to get out of my
protective bag and board

and take a risk with
my life for once.

He lived a full life
and read comics.

That's my grandfather's legacy.

I think that's
very astute of you.

Thanks.

Hey, so those guys you know.

Think they'd still
be interested?

Oh, I know they would.

I'll call 'em again.

Great.

Hi RJ!

Greetings, earthling.

You beautiful babe from England

for whom I've traveled in time.

Would you like some comics?

Yeah, can you show me
something in a She-Hulk?

As you wish.

I love Princess Bride.

Here's lookin' at you, kid.

Well you know me, it's my
duty to please that booty.

- Uh...
- Oh.

Thank you?

As you wish.

You're funny.

My friends and I were thinking
about maybe coming back

to the midnight showing.

Maybe you wanna join us?

You know that is if
the toilet situation is

under control and everything.

As you wish.

Okay.

Crap.

What is it with you and poop?

Jesus!

You're stealthy.

I hear you've
reconsidered my offer.

I have.

Scott, what are you doing?

He's just here for this.

- Fan vote.
- What?

It's why Jason Todd died.

Google.

Actually no.

My boss knew.

Everything seems to be in
mint or near mint condition.

My employer has authorized me--

Employer.

That's fancy.

Offer you this.

I didn't know comic
books were worth that much.

Of course we
are willing to negotiate

if you feel this
isn't a fair price.

How much if I keep the Batman?

Considerably less.

Ah, okay, never mind.

What do we do now?

Frakes won.

He tasks me.

As long as there is
breath in my body,

Scott Frakes has won nothing!

Gather up the SFRS.

Gather who up?

The SFRS.

No, no.

Super fast roller skates.

No.

Sordid friends really suck.

You're better than this.

Who were we just talking about?

- Scott Frakes...
- Rainbow...

The Scott Frakes Revenge Squad.

Oh.

The what?

Find me people
who don't like him.

- Oh.
- Right here.

Other people who don't like him.

- Go!
- Oh, oh!

This is awesome.

Yeah, yeah it is.

Okay come on,
let's lock this up.

We saved the theater!

- Hey!
- Scott saved the theater!

How?

He did it, he sold
some of his old comics!

Scott.

Are you sure you wanted...

No need to sell to Derek now.

I think our troubles are over.

Partner.

I'll lock it in the office today

and take it to
the bank tomorrow.

Yes!

Scott!

Selling your grandpa's comics,
that must have been hard.

And speaking of guys I hate.

Ching, deflected.

I'm here to offer a truce.

Rosebud.

What are you talking about?

I'm extending an olive branch.

Let's put an end to all
this destructive conflict.

Yeah right, what's
in it for you?

Altruism, generosity, Rosebud.

Why do you keep saying Rosebud?

You know.

What the hell are
you talking about?

You know!

Oh seriously?

That's locked!

My dear nerds!

We have amassed on this
eve to exact our vengeance

on a man who has
undoubtedly mocked us all!

Scott Frakes thinks
himself superior.

Thinks himself a superhero.

Thinks he's seven feet tall

and shoots lightning
bolts out his arse!

This coming from a man who
betrayed his best friend

on the lowest level imaginable!

Tonight, we destroy
Scott Frakes!

I'll throw in free concessions.

Ooh!

You have been tasked
with finding a legion

sympathetic to our cause!

Seriously, go find people
to pay to cause some chaos.

Go!

Go!

The liberation of the
Monarch has begun!

Ha!

Whew!

Yeah.

Feel good about that.

- Thank you.
- Thanks.

One please.

It's on RJ.

Oh, thank you.

That's really sweet.

I'm just trying to
give him better odds

than an ice cube's
chance in hell.

Oh.

It's not me though,
I swear to god.

Hi, may I please have a
peanut butter and jelly soda

and a small popcorn?

Of course.

Ah, this one's on RJ.

That's so sweet.

Where is he?

I haven't seen him, but I'm sure

he's around here somewhere.

Okay, thanks anyways.

Go.

I didn't know you
were so popular.

Yeah.

Well I and my many, many, many
friends thought we'd stop by

and soak up the
ambiance and help you

celebrate your big success.

Hold up, how did you even know?

In fact, I thought
maybe we could toast

to celebrate our new alliance.

Diet cola, right.

Two.

- Kira, no, you don't have--
- Yeah she does.

Comfortable silence,
old friends.

Just, pew!

Whoops!

- Really?
- Yeah.

Shh.

Cheers, old friend.

This one's on me.

Cheers, dickhead,
I get them for free.

Charming.

Oh Gabby.

I was wondering if we could
maybe go up to your office

to discuss a little
counter offer.

I don't think I need to anymore.

Surely there's something
I have to offer you.

You're still talking
business, right?

Why don't we go to your
office and talk about it?

You first.

I love watching
her walk upstairs.

Thank you for showing up.

I invited you.

♪ Who's the smart girl
that always gets her nerd ♪

♪ Heather ♪

♪ You're darn right ♪

Hmm.

What's wrong with you?

Just need to go to the bathroom.

You're fine.

You don't look fine to me.

It's really a shame
you wouldn't take me up

on my dinner offer.

Let's just stay on business.

Fair enough, for now.

I'm aware that Scott
has recently come in

to a largish sum of
money, so we're prepared

to make a counter offer.

Fly away.

As you can see
it's very generous.

So you can give
Scott his money back.

Just imagine all
the time wasting

he could do with that cash.

Yeah.

So what do you say, Gabs?

Why struggle to
maintain this lifestyle

with all that looming specter
of debt just?

Your life is waiting
for you, Gabby.

These castles are
waiting for you.

Carpe deez nuts.

That's grab life by the balls.

Trademark, hashtag merch.

Pull it together man.

Psst.

What the hell is going on?

Look in the trash can.

Trash can?

Yes.

What's up?

You're killing my mojo.

It's Scott, he's
been in there a while.

- Just...
- Okay, I'm on it.

I apologize.

My transporter ring appears
to be malfunctioning.

What are you talking about?

I'll deal with you later.

Okay.

You know what I'm talking about.

Vixen of my heart.

But Rosebud, let's finish this.

Scott, wait!

Dress as sidekick Cub.

Apparently I'm Cub.

I'm sorry Cub, this is
one fight I must do alone.

Scott's lost it.

He said he wasn't feeling well,

I thought he just had
diarrhea and then out popped

hobo Batman.

It's like he... shit!

What?

Someone drugged him!

If he gets hurt, I am
not, can you excuse me?

Can you go get him?

I'm gonna find Gabby
and just get Kira!

Okay, excuse me.

What are you maniacs doing?

This looks really
good but I could never

change the name of the theater.

Oh I'm sorry,
that's not negotiable.

Neither is the anti-phrase
clause, it's page four.

The whole thing.

- Gabs, it's Scott.
- Scott?

Among other things.

You need to come now.

I'm sorry, I have to go.

Yeah yeah run run
I'm right behind you.

I love it when a
plan comes together.

Hello precious.

My sins
have come back to haunt me.

Rosebud.

That was amazing.

Did you like it?

I did, I actually did.

- It reminded me so much of--
- How could you?

Derek?

How could you?

What?

You betrayed me.

Your my girl, you're
supposed to end up with me.

We went on one
date two months ago!

My friend Scott takes my
girl to a comic book movie!

It's the biggest betrayal
of them all, Scott!

I can't tell if you're
jealous of her or me.

We were never together,
it was one date.

Fine, go play your hopscotch,

but you're gonna rue this day!

Rue this day?

Who even talks like that?

I do Frakes, I talk like that!

She's my Rosebud, Scott,
you're my Rosebud.

Rose, my name is Rose.

It creeps me out when
you call me that.

Thought it was, like, sweet.

Derek, I'm sorry.

- I didn't mean to--
- No don't pity me!

Don't, don't laugh at me either!

You know I vow I will have
my revenge on both of you.

From hell's heart I
shall stab at thee.

For hate's sake I will
spit my last bread at thee.

You will bow down before
me and so will your heirs!

You're not gonna be DM anymore?

Never!

This ends tonight.

Never!

Sup?

Sup.

Put this on it, Cub.

More like Spiderman.

Ashley, Ashley.

- The briefcase is gone.
- What?

I didn't lock the
office door when I ran out

and someone took it.

Derek!

How can we prove this?

I'm gonna sell the
theater to Derek

and I'm gonna pay
Scott back what I can.

What?

I did not sign up for
always smelling like

stale popcorn and
plunging toilets

and hallucinating employees--

Great, let's run away from here.

I'm not running
away, I'm moving on.

I know.

Do you, Ashley, do
you know the difference?

Yeah Gabby, I do.

This coming from the girl
who habitually blacks out?

I took some medication
that didn't agree with me.

That is bullshit
and you know it.

What are you trying to say?

I'm saying you have a problem!

I'm not a junkie.

Is that what you
really think of me?

Who are you to judge me like
your life is some perfect

paradigm of independence
and strength?

It took Clark Kent
dying for you to go

to the cave of aloneness!

Actually it's the
Fortress of Solitude.

Ah!

Ashley--

Careful, I wouldn't want
to drag you down with me.

And it was Jonathon Kent who...

You know, it's not important.

Does this mean I'm dead?

No dude.

I'm still dead.

But you don't look dead.

How's this?

Sup?

What the hell is going on?

Come on!

Alright, first things first
take that thing off your head.

I can't take you
seriously like that.

Secondly, you been
drugged, dummy.

Like Batman Begins?

Yeah sure whatever.

I'm not really here.

This is all going
on inside your head.

Your subconscious
is imagining me.

Wait, I sold all
my dearly possessions

to save the theater.

I saved the theater!

Why don't I feel better?

Well the old man's
gone, I'm gone,

Ashley and Gabby are leaving.

Yeah?

Look if you don't get it,
I can't explain it to you.

Then why did you come
back from the gravely plane

if you can't explain it to me?

Are you serious?

I'm not, I didn't come back.

Fine, yes, I am back, I am
back from the gravely plane.

So cool.

Hey Ashley, how you doing?

Oh hi, little busy.

I can relate.

I worked a full 32 hours at
Target this week, I am beat.

Think I'm gonna treat
myself to something special.

Maybe Applebee's.

Maybe Chili's if
I'm feeling fancy.

Hey, have you
seen Scott anywhere?

Nope.

You guys having a little tryst?

Of course not, you know
it's always you and me.

Whoa, nelly, look.

I didn't mean to lead you on.

You're pretty and all but with
your obvious drinking problem

you're not exactly the type of
girl I can take home to Mom.

Literally, I live with her.

So I'm gonna hit the road.

To Perdition.

It's a 2002 film reference
starring Tom Hanks

and some guys in hats so.

You'll find somebody.

I will say this though, film
canister was a nice touch,

I did like that.

Why do you want to
save the theater?

Is it because you love
the building so much?

Or because it allows you
to not have to move forward

with your life?

Or maybe there's another
reason it means so much to you.

Another reason.

Search your feelings.

Sorry dude, your face though.

Alright, big question.

What and who are you
saving the theater for?

I don't know.

Yeah you do.

Because if you didn't
know the answer

I couldn't ask the question.

Uh, I wanna save the
theater for the films.

And to battle the
evil corporations.

To find my thing.

Dude, don't be so literal.

Hey.

There you are.

I just got turned down
by fanny pack guy.

You believe that?

Talk about a low point.

I found my thing.

His thing, like his penis?

Is he gonna be okay?

He'll be okay, I've seen worse.

I bet you have.

Is this what I look like?

You drool a little bit more.

Ashley, about what I said--

No, you were right.

I was hiding.

It's not that my dreams
went away, it's that I did.

Well you keep on telling
me to hit the road.

I think you should get back
on the horse, you know,

metaphorically speaking.

I miss it a lot.

Maybe I'll do a blog, or maybe
I'll do community theater.

Or something.

I'll be in the front row.

Bye Jon.

Is he okay?

He'll be fine.

Okay good.

This is like Christmas.

Oh no no no no no no.

This doesn't happen every day.

How you doing?

I feel like the
floor of a taxi cab.

What?

- Ghostbusters.
- Ghostbusters.

Concessionaires, the time
of your demise is upon us.

Looking a little worse
for wear, Frakes.

You been taking after this one?

Kira, why?

My family has to come first.

We're your family too Kira.

I'm gonna--

What are you gonna do?

Oh that's right, nothing.

Meet Derek at the Fisk
Cinema for the final showdown.

Hey watch out for the door.

Do you want us to come with you?

Nope.

I gotta do this myself.

Well that's stupid.

Ah.

Now as you'll see this is
pretty standard boilerplate

for this kind of thing.

Transferring ownership of
the theater from Gabby to me.

You don't have
to do this, Derek.

I haven't seen Rose
since that night.

Frakes, you can still save it.

What?

Yeah I'm not a monster.

You can still save the
theater so you can work there.

That's what you've always
wanted to do, right?

Why would you do that?

Because I'm a giver.

I like to help people, Scott.

Even you.

Oh.

There is one tiny little
thing I'm gonna need you to do

before I can do that for you.

Kneel.

Huh?

Kneel before me.

Kneel and accept
me as your master

and beg me not to burn
the Monarch Theater

down to the ground
and piss on its ashes.

Scott, no.

Just let it go.

I told you I have
to do this alone.

Yeah, well that was stupid.

Why should you do this alone?

Yes, yes, yes!

Now admit it.

Scott, admit it to them,
to me, to yourself.

Admit that I am better than you.

Admit that I have won.

You said you were
gonna destroy that

which I hold most dear.

Well you can't do that.

Wait, what?

You think the theater
is what I hold most dear.

Honestly like until
just a little bit ago

I thought that's what
it was too but it's not.

What I hold most dear are the
memories that I have there.

Showing kids Jaws
for the first time.

Arguing over origin
stories or if Higgins

was really Robin Masters.

- Yes.
- What?

Higgins is clearly
Robin Masters.

Are you?

None of that matters.

Without these people.

It's just a building.

You can tear down that theater.

But I'll still have more
than you'll ever know.

You're joking.

No, you can't, it's,
no, no, I won, I won!

I won!

Tell me something, kid.

You ever dance with the
devil in the pale moonlight?

What?

What the hell?

I'm embarrassed for them.

No no no, not the ear!

Ow, no, charlie horse, mercy!

Enough!

What the hell is going on?

Father.

They assaulted me,
they assaulted me.

That is not what I heard.

Boy, what have you done?

I can explain that Father.

I can explain everything.

Enough.

You will have an emergency
session with Dr. Young

first thing in the morning.

No no, I can't!

Shh, they'll have
lollipops for you.

Lollipops?

He's always had
a few screws loose.

Anything my son has said or done

I sincerely apologize and I do
still wanna own your theater.

To be honest, I just
want out of that place.

Well I'll offer you
top dollar, but first

I have to do some business
with someone here.

Scott.

Oh god, what'd I do now?

You and I have a lot more
in common than you think.

I hide my nerd side
better than most.

You have a lot of heart.

Just like him.

Yeah, I knew your grandfather,
he was a good man.

So it must have took
a lot for you to sell

those comic books.

I think you're the person
to run these theaters.

Actually, what about
him being your partner?

Kira?

And besides, this is
yours, you earned it.

Welcome back, kiddo.

Thanks Scott.

That's right, I had already
made a verbal commitment

with Scott.

Does that secure him some
shares in the theater?

I'd be nowhere
in business without

the value of my
word so yes it does.

And in the sense of good faith,
welcome to Fisk Theaters.

Oh, and I think your
grandfather would be happy

if you held onto that one.

Batman?

Oh, welcome home.

Now that you've
said all of this,

I just wanted to throw
some ideas by you.

It involves multiple
revenue streams.

- Money?
- A lot of it.

Arm lady Pendragon.

The sword.

- Hi, can I have your picture?
- Oh sure!

And don't forget to check out
my blog for upcoming projects.

I totally will,
I love your show.

Oh thanks.

Hey.

So, what do you think?

Hot time in nerd boner town.

Six, 13, and 18 year old
Scott would have loved this.

What about older version?

Pretty much the same.

Larry sold us all of
his old inventory.

He's letting us move it
gradually over as he closes.

Oh.

Oh check it out.

I hired RJ's little girlfriend
for a couple nights a week.

Do they get any work done?

Not really.

Mostly they just make
out in the broom closet.

But all the old people
always say how cute they are.

I'm proud of them.

I'm proud of you.

Is this where we reveal our
true feelings for each other?

Not yet, I'm working my program.

Not until I have a
gold one of these.

Ah.

I hate cliffhangers.

Spoiler alert.

Willy Wonka said

there is no life I know to
compare with true imagination.

Living there you can be free
if you truly wish to be.

Colin Winters wrote
everyone has the right

to make an ass of themselves.

You just can't let the
world judge you too much.

There was Conan the
Barbarian who said.

What is best in life?

To crush your enemies.

See them driven before you,
and to hear the lamentation

of their women.

But
remember, Grandpa Frakes said--

Make sure the story of your life

is worth telling.

And that's pretty cool.

RJ.

Come on.

Reset.

Cut, go again.

What the **** does
a viking sound like?

They deserve a viking funeral.

Coming soon to Monarch
Theaters, Fisk Theaters!

Oh doggy!

You know what I'm talking about.

Cut.

You go and have your fun,
have your biracial babies,

see if I care!

Oh Scott, there's some guy
in a suit looking for you.

Cut.

Really?

- Meow.
- Cut.

Standby, we're ready, stand by.

Standby.

Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Like this?

Yeah.

Every man dies, not
every man really lives.

**** I shouldn't have said that.

Hey, come...

Okay, I'll, the one, I'll
just take it so you go.

You made me feel dead inside.

- Am I too early?
- I don't know.

Is it somebody else's line?

- Is it yours?
- Is it my line?

I think so.

I thought that was
later, I thought he talks

about the barter.

Oh damnit you're
right, I **** it up!

Give me high fives!

Yeah, you know all
of it, I love it!

This is one fight
I must do alone.

- Batman.
- Cut!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, yo, hey.

Harmless flirtation?

Damnit, this just
keeps happening.

Look, it's clear to me that
you're into all of this

and I gotta warn you it's
even better on the back side.

So I'm gonna turn and walk away,

but what I need you to
do is to avert your gaze

because if it locks
in on my caboose,

it's just gonna
suck you right in.

And I'm gone.

Actually I gotta wait 10 minutes
for the number two bus so.

- One please.
- No.

It's on RJ.

Oh, thank you.

That's really sweet.

Alright.

I don't normally do this but

after your shift do you
wanna come back to my place

and help me give my
cat her diabetes shot?

She's missing a foot.

Stop it.

Bye, bye, say bye.

- Say bye.
- Bye.

- Say bye.
- Let's go.

No not to us honey.

Okay, we're gonna go.