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1
00:00:01,523 --> 00:00:02,263
Let's go.
2
00:00:03,046 --> 00:00:03,699
- Doc.
3
00:00:03,829 --> 00:00:04,786
She has no recollection
4
00:00:04,787 --> 00:00:05,787
of the last eight years.
5
00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:06,615
Bring it on.
6
00:00:06,789 --> 00:00:07,659
I came here to help you.
7
00:00:07,833 --> 00:00:08,878
"Kitchen Nightmares”
8
00:00:09,052 --> 00:00:09,661
Are you in.
9
00:00:09,835 --> 00:00:11,315
And “Going Dutch”
10
00:00:11,489 --> 00:00:12,273
Pew pew pew.
11
00:00:12,490 --> 00:00:13,665
First guns I've
seen on the base.
12
00:00:13,883 --> 00:00:14,622
Let's go,
let's go.
13
00:00:14,623 --> 00:00:16,233
All available now.
14
00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:22,935
♪ Happy birthday to you
15
00:00:23,066 --> 00:00:25,502
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
16
00:00:25,503 --> 00:00:27,984
- Whose birthday is it?
- Must be someone pretty popular.
17
00:00:28,071 --> 00:00:29,333
- Ain't it?
- Huh.
18
00:00:29,420 --> 00:00:34,076
♪ Happy birthday dear Maggie ♪
19
00:00:34,077 --> 00:00:39,126
♪ Happy birthday to you
20
00:00:39,213 --> 00:00:40,649
[cheering]
21
00:00:40,736 --> 00:00:42,781
Thank you. This is perfect.
22
00:00:42,868 --> 00:00:44,870
[instrumental music]
23
00:00:46,089 --> 00:00:48,352
- How you doing?
- I'm fine.
24
00:00:48,439 --> 00:00:49,788
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
25
00:00:51,529 --> 00:00:54,924
- I can tell you're not fine.
- I'm totally fine.
26
00:00:55,011 --> 00:00:55,881
- I can tell you're mad.
- Look.
27
00:00:56,012 --> 00:00:58,101
You remembered that you forgot
28
00:00:58,232 --> 00:00:59,885
my birthday this year.
That's great.
29
00:01:00,016 --> 00:01:01,931
That-that can be my gift.
30
00:01:02,018 --> 00:01:03,715
That's how far
we've lowered the bar?
31
00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:06,240
Oh, the bar. Gosh.
32
00:01:06,327 --> 00:01:08,285
That was on the ground
ten years ago,
33
00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:10,548
and now there's really
just ground.
34
00:01:10,679 --> 00:01:11,593
- I know. So--
- Mm-hmm.
35
00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:13,115
A sweet old man with a metal
36
00:01:13,116 --> 00:01:15,162
detector thought
he found treasure recently.
37
00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:18,120
- But it was just the bar.
- The bar. Oh.
38
00:01:18,121 --> 00:01:19,905
- Yeah.
- All right. I feel like--
39
00:01:20,036 --> 00:01:21,820
Saying happy birthday to me?
40
00:01:21,907 --> 00:01:23,909
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you.
41
00:01:23,996 --> 00:01:25,911
Happy birthday to me.
42
00:01:26,042 --> 00:01:29,176
[theme music]
43
00:01:31,047 --> 00:01:34,050
Yeah, you can just put 'em
right over there. Thank you.
44
00:01:34,137 --> 00:01:35,704
Ah! Hi.
45
00:01:35,791 --> 00:01:37,706
I take it none of these gifts
are from your dad.
46
00:01:37,793 --> 00:01:39,795
Oh, that's nothing new.
47
00:01:39,882 --> 00:01:43,842
The most thoughtful gift he ever
got me was on my 18th birthday.
48
00:01:43,929 --> 00:01:47,324
Um, it was a handful of loose
change he found in a cup holder.
49
00:01:47,411 --> 00:01:49,586
- Well, did he wrap it?
- Yeah.
50
00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:51,153
You seem pretty chill about
your birthday, so I guess
51
00:01:51,154 --> 00:01:53,635
you're not interested
in a gift from me...
52
00:01:53,722 --> 00:01:56,941
Ah, ah! You didn't have to.
You didn't have to.
53
00:01:56,942 --> 00:01:59,509
- I had to. Go ahead.
- Oh.
54
00:01:59,510 --> 00:02:01,251
[laughs] Oh, my...
55
00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:05,298
It's the nickname I gave you
when we played korfball.
56
00:02:05,299 --> 00:02:07,388
Jiggly Boobs.
57
00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:09,171
Starting to think
that's probably not
58
00:02:09,172 --> 00:02:11,261
the most appropriate
workplace gift, but...
59
00:02:11,392 --> 00:02:14,351
No, it's not. But this must have
taken you so long.
60
00:02:14,438 --> 00:02:16,832
- Yeah, only six weeks.
- That's crazy.
61
00:02:16,962 --> 00:02:19,226
I know. It's not a big deal.
I'm a big gift guy.
62
00:02:19,313 --> 00:02:20,444
I mean, you should see
what I got Captain Torres
63
00:02:20,531 --> 00:02:22,533
and Major Daniels
for their wedding.
64
00:02:22,620 --> 00:02:24,621
For their wedding? Stop. I did
not even know they were dating.
65
00:02:24,622 --> 00:02:26,406
They kept it secret for a while,
but then they went public
66
00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:28,190
after he transferred
to Wiesbaden, so...
67
00:02:28,191 --> 00:02:29,192
All the couples I know
in the army
68
00:02:29,323 --> 00:02:33,283
start off secretly dating.
Yeah.
69
00:02:37,766 --> 00:02:39,898
- Okay. Well, I'm gonna go.
- See you later, Jiggly Boobs.
70
00:02:39,985 --> 00:02:42,466
- Enjoy.
- Thank you.
71
00:02:44,338 --> 00:02:47,210
[chuckles] This is stupid.
72
00:02:47,341 --> 00:02:48,646
Mm.
73
00:02:48,777 --> 00:02:51,606
Tell me, is this
an American-sized portion,
74
00:02:51,693 --> 00:02:54,478
or are you just upset
about your daughter?
75
00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:57,916
I don't know. I've never felt
guilty about her before.
76
00:02:58,003 --> 00:03:01,005
I don't know what's different
about it this time.
77
00:03:01,006 --> 00:03:03,443
I guess
I love my daughter. Um...
78
00:03:03,444 --> 00:03:05,272
I didn't mean that to sound
as bad as it sounded.
79
00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:10,450
I enjoy watching you discover
basic human emotion.
80
00:03:10,451 --> 00:03:12,801
It's like watching a dog
recite poetry.
81
00:03:12,888 --> 00:03:15,672
I just can't shake it, you know?
82
00:03:15,673 --> 00:03:18,676
Are you happy, Davidson? This is
why you sent me to Stroopsdorf?
83
00:03:18,763 --> 00:03:21,418
Well, I don't think you can
blame this on Gerald.
84
00:03:21,505 --> 00:03:24,465
- Did you say Gerald?
- No.
85
00:03:24,552 --> 00:03:26,249
It doesn't say his first name
up here.
86
00:03:26,380 --> 00:03:28,947
- You said Gerald.
- No, no, I said, uh...
87
00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:32,603
General-d. Generald.
88
00:03:32,690 --> 00:03:35,563
This, it's my accent. Duh.
89
00:03:35,693 --> 00:03:37,956
No, your accent is weird
in a different way.
90
00:03:38,043 --> 00:03:40,045
- No.
- He's a client.
91
00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:41,176
- Oh, my God!
- [gasps]
92
00:03:41,177 --> 00:03:43,397
He's a client at your brothel?
93
00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:45,442
This is like a birthday gift
from me.
94
00:03:45,529 --> 00:03:48,140
If he were,
I would never tell you.
95
00:03:48,271 --> 00:03:50,969
I give my clients
the same confidentiality
96
00:03:51,056 --> 00:03:53,624
as a physician with a patient!
97
00:03:53,711 --> 00:03:57,062
- Ah, that's a yes. Oh, honey.
- It is most certainly nothing.
98
00:03:57,193 --> 00:03:58,890
It's the yes-iest of yeses.
99
00:03:58,977 --> 00:04:02,459
It is the no-iest of I do not
know what you're talking about.
100
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:03,939
All right, just give me
one little detail
101
00:04:04,069 --> 00:04:05,506
of his freaky-deaky sex life.
102
00:04:05,593 --> 00:04:07,986
My client's trust
means everything to me.
103
00:04:08,073 --> 00:04:09,988
And if I mean anything to you,
104
00:04:10,075 --> 00:04:13,862
you will just
drop this now. Okay?
105
00:04:13,949 --> 00:04:15,516
[Patrick] Hey, I figured out
how to get us a transfer
106
00:04:15,646 --> 00:04:17,126
- out of here.
- Transfer? But...
107
00:04:17,213 --> 00:04:18,388
Davidson's
never gonna approve that.
108
00:04:18,519 --> 00:04:19,868
Ho-ho. That's where you're
wrong.
109
00:04:19,955 --> 00:04:21,304
I just found out that he
110
00:04:21,391 --> 00:04:23,219
is a client at Katja's brothel.
111
00:04:23,306 --> 00:04:24,481
- How about that?
- Ah, yeah.
112
00:04:24,568 --> 00:04:26,527
He'd get a dishonorable
discharge for all those
113
00:04:26,657 --> 00:04:28,180
dishonorable discharges.
114
00:04:28,311 --> 00:04:29,965
- That?
- [laughs] I just found it.
115
00:04:30,095 --> 00:04:32,315
See, this is why you have to do
the open-mic nights again.
116
00:04:32,446 --> 00:04:35,231
It may seem insane to consider
117
00:04:35,318 --> 00:04:36,580
blackmailing
a direct superior officer,
118
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,060
but I've thought it through,
so hear me out.
119
00:04:38,147 --> 00:04:39,540
- I'm in. Totally in.
- Oh.
120
00:04:39,670 --> 00:04:41,759
With this much leverage,
we could request Dulmen.
121
00:04:41,890 --> 00:04:43,891
That's 40 minutes across the
German border, and then Maggie
122
00:04:43,892 --> 00:04:46,024
would be outside of my chain
and your chain of command,
123
00:04:46,111 --> 00:04:50,114
which would be good for us.
Uh, meaning me and you.
124
00:04:50,115 --> 00:04:52,466
Okay. All we need
is the proof now.
125
00:04:52,553 --> 00:04:54,555
We're not gonna get any of that
from Katja
126
00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:57,340
'cause she's like a steel vault,
which is why I decided
127
00:04:57,427 --> 00:05:00,038
to bring in the best hacker
I know.
128
00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:02,693
[door opens]
129
00:05:02,780 --> 00:05:04,695
- What took you so long?
- I'm the hacker.
130
00:05:04,782 --> 00:05:06,436
So you were just standing behind
that door the whole time?
131
00:05:06,567 --> 00:05:08,482
Yeah, yeah.
Like a theatrical little...
132
00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:10,352
- Dramatic, huh?
- All right, let's do it.
133
00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:11,702
- High five. Listen, guys.
- Yeah. Let's do it.
134
00:05:11,789 --> 00:05:13,921
I'll get Davidson to attend our
4th of July celebration,
135
00:05:13,922 --> 00:05:16,620
and just like our forefathers,
we are gonna liberate ourselves
136
00:05:16,707 --> 00:05:18,405
from tyranny,
in this case, his tyranny,
137
00:05:18,492 --> 00:05:20,710
by stealing the old perv's
GPS data.
138
00:05:20,711 --> 00:05:22,495
So let's go extort
a two-star general.
139
00:05:22,496 --> 00:05:24,062
Okay, let's not even say that
out loud.
140
00:05:24,149 --> 00:05:25,367
We don't need to do that.
141
00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:27,239
[whispers] Let's go extort
a two-star general.
142
00:05:27,370 --> 00:05:28,937
- That's better. Good luck.
- That's better.
143
00:05:29,024 --> 00:05:31,635
- Good.
- Go get it.
144
00:05:31,722 --> 00:05:33,071
Blackmail! Okay, sorry.
145
00:05:33,158 --> 00:05:35,073
- What is wrong with you?
- I don't know. I'm excited.
146
00:05:39,077 --> 00:05:41,515
[Abraham] This is a no-phones
event. No exceptions.
147
00:05:41,602 --> 00:05:43,734
All right, have your phones
out and ready.
148
00:05:43,821 --> 00:05:46,170
Please put 'em
in the locked bag.
149
00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:48,173
D'you think that maybe I could
look at a few photos of my mom
150
00:05:48,304 --> 00:05:49,392
one last time?
151
00:05:49,523 --> 00:05:50,915
You'll get it back
when you leave.
152
00:05:51,002 --> 00:05:52,307
Oh, nice. Cool.
153
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:54,092
General.
Thank you for coming, sir.
154
00:05:54,179 --> 00:05:57,095
It's a 4th of July party, and
you wanna discuss surrender?
155
00:05:57,182 --> 00:05:59,141
I've been waiting for you to
leave since the day you arrived.
156
00:05:59,228 --> 00:06:00,838
This is my kind of heaven.
157
00:06:00,969 --> 00:06:03,014
Oh, sorry, general.
Uh, we will need your cell.
158
00:06:03,101 --> 00:06:05,190
- It's a phone-free event.
- What if I have to hit the head?
159
00:06:05,277 --> 00:06:07,628
Am I supposed to do it in
complete silence? Like a monk?
160
00:06:07,758 --> 00:06:10,848
I am so sorry, general,
but it's mandatory
161
00:06:10,935 --> 00:06:13,503
because the USO has booked us
a musical guest,
162
00:06:13,634 --> 00:06:15,984
and he wants no phones
for video recording.
163
00:06:16,071 --> 00:06:19,987
I'll give you a hint.
He goes by, uh, The Boss.
164
00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:22,773
- Bruce?
- Shh!
165
00:06:22,860 --> 00:06:23,948
Mn-mn.
166
00:06:24,906 --> 00:06:25,689
Ah.
167
00:06:28,779 --> 00:06:31,652
[instrumental music]
168
00:06:33,436 --> 00:06:36,134
General, how would you like
to inaugurate our photo booth?
169
00:06:36,221 --> 00:06:40,137
I would gladly commemorate
the day I got rid of you.
170
00:06:40,138 --> 00:06:41,444
There you go.
171
00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:43,490
Okay, general. There we go.
172
00:06:45,927 --> 00:06:47,363
[laughs]
173
00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,409
- [beeping]
- [camera clicks]
174
00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:53,848
GPS data is now unlocked.
175
00:06:53,935 --> 00:06:55,023
[door shuts]
176
00:07:01,333 --> 00:07:02,944
- [Maggie] Hey.
- Oh, hey, girl.
177
00:07:03,031 --> 00:07:05,425
Uh, what you doing?
178
00:07:05,512 --> 00:07:07,688
I refuse to serve swill
at this base
179
00:07:07,818 --> 00:07:09,733
like we're ridding
a party boat at Lake Havasu.
180
00:07:09,820 --> 00:07:11,909
So I'm pouring
expensive Belgian bottles
181
00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:13,737
into these American cans.
182
00:07:13,824 --> 00:07:17,262
Hey, so Shah and I were just
having a conversation,
183
00:07:17,349 --> 00:07:21,615
and, uh, there was a vibe.
184
00:07:21,702 --> 00:07:23,704
We were talking about
these officers who were
185
00:07:23,791 --> 00:07:26,402
secretly dating, and, you know,
we were talking about them,
186
00:07:26,489 --> 00:07:31,233
but we were really
talking about us.
187
00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:33,104
I'm not surprised.
188
00:07:33,191 --> 00:07:35,062
Ever since he got here, he's
been snorting your pheromones
189
00:07:35,063 --> 00:07:36,891
like some finance bro
in a bathroom stall.
190
00:07:36,978 --> 00:07:39,459
The question is, um,
are you interested?
191
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:42,723
I am.
192
00:07:42,853 --> 00:07:45,247
- I am.
- Mm-hmm.
193
00:07:45,334 --> 00:07:47,684
But it's complicated, so...
194
00:07:49,512 --> 00:07:51,775
- Can I simplify for you?
- Yeah. Yes.
195
00:07:51,862 --> 00:07:53,821
So he is your boss.
196
00:07:53,951 --> 00:07:56,519
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- He's going through a divorce.
197
00:07:56,606 --> 00:07:58,608
He has a complicated
relationship with your dad.
198
00:07:58,739 --> 00:08:00,958
You have a complicated
relationship with your dad.
199
00:08:01,089 --> 00:08:02,351
And if this doesn't work out,
200
00:08:02,438 --> 00:08:03,657
it's gonna flip your world
upside down,
201
00:08:03,744 --> 00:08:06,310
and I'm a part of your world,
Maggie.
202
00:08:06,311 --> 00:08:08,095
Please think of me.
203
00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,925
- Oh, that stinks.
- It's just the situation.
204
00:08:11,012 --> 00:08:14,231
No, I accidentally drank
one of the real domestic beers.
205
00:08:14,232 --> 00:08:15,538
- How we doing?
- Uh--
206
00:08:15,669 --> 00:08:17,148
We getting some crazy, perverse
207
00:08:17,235 --> 00:08:18,410
stuff off Davidson's phone?
208
00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:20,108
The dude's phone
is completely clean.
209
00:08:20,195 --> 00:08:21,849
- What're you talking about?
- Only thing I can find
210
00:08:21,979 --> 00:08:23,372
is his Wordle score,
and he's a beast, man.
211
00:08:23,459 --> 00:08:24,678
He wins so many in two.
212
00:08:24,765 --> 00:08:26,462
There's no GPS data
or, you know...
213
00:08:26,549 --> 00:08:29,683
No, there's not, because every
time he gets near that brothel,
214
00:08:29,770 --> 00:08:32,119
he turns his phone off,
so he's like a ghost.
215
00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:35,210
He's like a really horny ghost
who, I can't stress this enough,
216
00:08:35,340 --> 00:08:39,256
happens to be a complete,
absolute MJ at Wordle.
217
00:08:39,257 --> 00:08:41,303
[band music]
218
00:08:43,261 --> 00:08:45,132
At least I don't have to do that
with the colonel.
219
00:08:45,133 --> 00:08:46,263
Abe. Abe!
220
00:08:46,264 --> 00:08:49,529
- Hi!
- Hey, Celeste!
221
00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:51,922
- Hey!
- What are you doing here?
222
00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:54,141
I was at a PAO's
training seminar in Ansbach,
223
00:08:54,142 --> 00:08:55,577
and I figured I'd stop by.
224
00:08:55,578 --> 00:08:56,797
- It's only three hours.
- Right.
225
00:08:56,884 --> 00:08:59,060
And we're still
technically married.
226
00:08:59,147 --> 00:09:02,237
Um, I just really wanted
to see your face.
227
00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:05,719
Thoughts? Considering I'm being
super vulnerable right now.
228
00:09:05,806 --> 00:09:08,591
This is, uh...
It's a lot to process.
229
00:09:08,722 --> 00:09:12,028
But, um, well,
it's good to see you.
230
00:09:12,029 --> 00:09:13,813
There's just nothing
on the phone that will help us.
231
00:09:13,814 --> 00:09:16,425
There's gotta be something
we can do. Hey, soldier.
232
00:09:16,512 --> 00:09:18,079
Get your head in the game.
All right?
233
00:09:18,166 --> 00:09:20,951
I am the greatest military mind
of my generation.
234
00:09:21,038 --> 00:09:22,736
- Really?
- Yes!
235
00:09:22,823 --> 00:09:24,607
I don't walk away
from anything, okay?
236
00:09:24,738 --> 00:09:28,219
Except explosions.
In slow motion.
237
00:09:28,306 --> 00:09:31,658
How's, um, Terrence?
238
00:09:31,745 --> 00:09:34,095
He's probably great.
Uh, we broke up.
239
00:09:34,182 --> 00:09:36,924
Which is part of the reason
I'm here.
240
00:09:37,054 --> 00:09:39,491
I'm looking for a new start
and up for transfer,
241
00:09:39,622 --> 00:09:43,713
so I was thinking
maybe Stroopsdorf?
242
00:09:43,844 --> 00:09:45,976
- So this Stroopsdorf?
- No, Stroopsdorf, New Jersey.
243
00:09:46,063 --> 00:09:49,719
- Yes, this Stroopsdorf.
- We have a very special guest.
244
00:09:49,850 --> 00:09:54,201
Give it up
for Bruce Springsteen's
245
00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:55,551
cover band.
246
00:09:55,638 --> 00:09:56,987
What?
247
00:09:57,074 --> 00:09:59,294
Thank you so much.
But I need to correct this.
248
00:09:59,424 --> 00:10:02,689
Jan and the Springstreets
are not a cover band.
249
00:10:02,776 --> 00:10:04,604
We can perform free
from the shackles
250
00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:07,215
of litigious
American corporations.
251
00:10:07,302 --> 00:10:09,085
Our first song is called
252
00:10:09,086 --> 00:10:12,307
Conceived In The Continental
United States.
253
00:10:12,437 --> 00:10:14,657
I gave away my phone for this?
254
00:10:14,744 --> 00:10:16,659
I'd love to be closer
to Gabriel,
255
00:10:16,746 --> 00:10:17,660
but what would that mean for us?
256
00:10:17,791 --> 00:10:19,488
I think it could mean
a lot of things.
257
00:10:19,575 --> 00:10:20,880
I just don't think this music is
258
00:10:20,881 --> 00:10:22,229
the best soundtrack
to discuss it.
259
00:10:22,230 --> 00:10:24,798
[Celeste] I've just been
thinking about you and us a lot.
260
00:10:24,885 --> 00:10:26,582
Okay, we should talk more,
but I gotta run.
261
00:10:29,193 --> 00:10:30,978
Here's what we're gonna do.
You're the tech whiz.
262
00:10:31,108 --> 00:10:33,154
You're gonna make me a bug
with a camera and a microphone,
263
00:10:33,241 --> 00:10:35,112
the whole nine yards, and you're
gonna make it fast, soldier.
264
00:10:35,199 --> 00:10:36,723
Otherwise I'm gonna send you
back to whatever crappy
265
00:10:36,810 --> 00:10:38,942
mid-sized American city
crapped you out.
266
00:10:39,029 --> 00:10:41,902
- Cedar Rapids.
- So you know the stakes, right?
267
00:10:42,032 --> 00:10:44,034
- Sir. We got a problem.
- Yes?
268
00:10:44,121 --> 00:10:46,515
[suspenseful music]
269
00:10:48,038 --> 00:10:50,911
Mm! Your girlfriend
made a surprise visit.
270
00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:52,390
If Davidson sees her,
he's gonna know something's up.
271
00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:54,478
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, I got it, I got it.
272
00:10:54,479 --> 00:10:56,177
- Go.
- Hey, honey!
273
00:10:56,264 --> 00:10:58,005
- Hi! Hi!
- Surprise!
274
00:10:58,135 --> 00:11:00,834
How are you? Heh-heh.
What are you doing here?
275
00:11:00,921 --> 00:11:02,705
Well, I just wanted
to experience
276
00:11:02,836 --> 00:11:04,925
my first
4th of July celebration.
277
00:11:05,055 --> 00:11:07,710
- Yes.
- Boo!
278
00:11:07,841 --> 00:11:11,496
- Please don't do that.
- That's an order!
279
00:11:11,583 --> 00:11:15,283
- [all] Boo!
- That's horrible of you!
280
00:11:15,370 --> 00:11:18,547
So you sit here, yeah. So let me
get you a-a flag and a beer.
281
00:11:18,634 --> 00:11:19,853
- Oh, American?
- Yes.
282
00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:22,071
- Uh, just a flag.
- Okay, honey.
283
00:11:22,072 --> 00:11:24,771
[Celeste sobbing]
284
00:11:26,294 --> 00:11:28,644
Oh. Hi.
285
00:11:28,731 --> 00:11:30,864
- [Celeste] Oh, hi.
- Are you okay?
286
00:11:30,951 --> 00:11:33,605
[Celeste] Oh, just crying
in the stall over a boy,
287
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:35,172
like the world's worst cliche.
288
00:11:35,259 --> 00:11:37,870
Uh, you wanna talk about it,
bathroom stranger?
289
00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:40,961
Uh, I just waited too long.
290
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:44,138
I waited, I waited
for everything to be right.
291
00:11:44,225 --> 00:11:46,618
Has that ever happened to you,
just wait too long?
292
00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:50,100
I might be doing that right now, actually.
293
00:11:50,187 --> 00:11:51,580
- Really?
- Yeah.
294
00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,320
- [Celeste] Don't do it!
- Yeah.
295
00:11:53,321 --> 00:11:54,931
Learn from my mistakes.
296
00:11:55,018 --> 00:11:58,761
- And I'm gonna go find him.
- Yeah! You go!
297
00:11:58,848 --> 00:12:00,893
- You go right now!
- Okay, thank you!
298
00:12:00,894 --> 00:12:03,983
- You got this!
- Yes! Get your man, girl.
299
00:12:03,984 --> 00:12:06,595
- [Maggie] You seem great.
- Yeah. I am...
300
00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:09,206
I am cute and I am fun.
301
00:12:09,337 --> 00:12:11,991
Wow, this is enlightening,
toilet lady!
302
00:12:11,992 --> 00:12:14,211
- Please don't call me that.
- Ooh. Yeah, sorry.
303
00:12:14,342 --> 00:12:15,560
[suspenseful music]
304
00:12:17,127 --> 00:12:18,172
General.
305
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:21,044
So, you ready to talk surrender?
306
00:12:21,131 --> 00:12:23,350
- Yes, I am. Your surrender.
- Good. Ah.
307
00:12:23,351 --> 00:12:26,353
Yes. See over there?
308
00:12:26,354 --> 00:12:27,747
That's my girlfriend Katja.
309
00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:30,880
As in, caught-ja. Get it?
310
00:12:32,621 --> 00:12:33,927
- If you'll excuse me.
- Ah.
311
00:12:34,014 --> 00:12:36,451
- She owns a brothel in town.
- Ahem.
312
00:12:36,581 --> 00:12:39,583
I would never jeopardize
my career by stepping inside.
313
00:12:39,584 --> 00:12:41,151
- Would you?
- No.
314
00:12:41,282 --> 00:12:42,544
No, I'm not...
315
00:12:46,156 --> 00:12:47,636
one to, um...
316
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:53,947
hide things. Nice try.
317
00:12:55,949 --> 00:12:56,950
Hm.
318
00:13:01,519 --> 00:13:02,956
- Abe.
- Yeah, uh, hey!
319
00:13:03,043 --> 00:13:05,001
- Hi, um...
- Are you good? You...
320
00:13:05,088 --> 00:13:07,264
Have you been running
or something?
321
00:13:07,395 --> 00:13:10,528
Oh, I just, uh...
Meat sweats. That's it.
322
00:13:10,615 --> 00:13:13,096
- Okay. Uh...
- Yeah.
323
00:13:13,183 --> 00:13:14,836
Can I talk to you about
something?
324
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:15,795
- Maybe in private.
- Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
325
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:17,013
Why don't we go
to the photo booth?
326
00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:18,885
- Right over here.
- Okay.
327
00:13:18,972 --> 00:13:20,060
Right.
328
00:13:21,583 --> 00:13:24,542
Uh, something's wrong.
329
00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,457
- Okay. You can tell?
- Yeah.
330
00:13:26,544 --> 00:13:30,634
Yeah, you know, you really need
oversized sunglasses.
331
00:13:30,635 --> 00:13:32,463
- Yeah.
- I do need these.
332
00:13:32,550 --> 00:13:34,030
Oh, there you go.
333
00:13:34,117 --> 00:13:36,076
- Now all is right in the world.
- Yeah!
334
00:13:36,163 --> 00:13:38,860
Ah, you know what?
There's something in your hair.
335
00:13:38,861 --> 00:13:39,993
It's the lack
of a tiny little hat.
336
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:41,733
Yes, it was the lack
of a tiny little hat.
337
00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:43,823
- Yeah, cowboy.
- Get in the frame.
338
00:13:43,910 --> 00:13:46,782
- Ah, I am in it now.
- [beeping]
339
00:13:48,566 --> 00:13:51,047
- Mm...
- Um, Abe.
340
00:13:51,134 --> 00:13:53,876
I wanted to say something,
which...
341
00:13:54,007 --> 00:13:56,357
- I will actually take these off.
- Why?
342
00:13:56,444 --> 00:13:59,577
It's not that serious. It's,
it's cool and casual and fun.
343
00:13:59,664 --> 00:14:01,666
I think there's a lot of stuff
344
00:14:01,753 --> 00:14:04,713
that goes unsaid
between you and me.
345
00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:07,150
- And I--
- Maggie.
346
00:14:07,237 --> 00:14:09,718
Before you go...
347
00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:11,807
Celeste wants to come here
to Stroopsdorf.
348
00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:13,548
- What?
- [camera clicks]
349
00:14:13,678 --> 00:14:15,244
Yeah, okay, she thought that
maybe we could try being
350
00:14:15,245 --> 00:14:17,160
a family one more time,
and for so long
351
00:14:17,247 --> 00:14:18,683
that's what I thought
I wanted, but...
352
00:14:18,814 --> 00:14:20,684
No, no buts, no buts about it.
353
00:14:20,685 --> 00:14:22,644
That is what you should do.
354
00:14:22,731 --> 00:14:25,081
[crowd cheering in distance]
355
00:14:25,168 --> 00:14:27,170
You don't think
that's, like, crazy?
356
00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:30,042
I think it would be crazy
if you didn't bring her here.
357
00:14:30,043 --> 00:14:31,391
- [beeping]
- [Jan] Okay, everybody, thank...
358
00:14:31,392 --> 00:14:33,481
Uh, I, um...
359
00:14:33,568 --> 00:14:35,700
I wanna go check on something.
360
00:14:35,787 --> 00:14:37,615
- Mm-hmm.
- Sorry. One sec.
361
00:14:40,314 --> 00:14:41,053
[instrumental music]
362
00:14:41,054 --> 00:14:44,361
Whoo! Let's take a look at that.
363
00:14:44,448 --> 00:14:48,277
It looks like you did a fart,
and that fart destroyed her.
364
00:14:48,278 --> 00:14:49,714
- Can I keep it?
- No.
365
00:14:52,717 --> 00:14:54,763
Gerry, it's so lovely
to see you.
366
00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:55,982
No, no, no,
don't play innocent with me.
367
00:14:56,069 --> 00:14:58,636
You assured me that my visits
368
00:14:58,723 --> 00:15:00,203
to the brothel
were confidential.
369
00:15:00,290 --> 00:15:02,989
I would never violate
your trust, Gerry.
370
00:15:04,555 --> 00:15:05,861
She's telling the truth.
371
00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:08,124
She's not blackmailing you.
I am.
372
00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,734
[intense music]
373
00:15:09,821 --> 00:15:12,694
This is the one
you were supposed to find.
374
00:15:12,781 --> 00:15:15,436
And this, this is the real bug.
375
00:15:15,523 --> 00:15:17,655
I knew you'd confront Katja
and let your guard down.
376
00:15:17,742 --> 00:15:19,788
[Patrick] All I had to do
was hide my microphone
377
00:15:19,875 --> 00:15:21,833
behind the red, white and blue.
378
00:15:21,964 --> 00:15:24,879
So it seems like the chickens
have come home to roost, yeah?
379
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,882
And I got you by the eggs.
380
00:15:28,188 --> 00:15:30,146
Unless you wanna grant me
a transfer.
381
00:15:34,759 --> 00:15:36,108
[scoffs, chuckles]
382
00:15:36,109 --> 00:15:38,807
You used me as a pawn
in your game?
383
00:15:38,894 --> 00:15:41,941
A pawn can bring down a king.
And he's not gonna say anything.
384
00:15:42,028 --> 00:15:43,768
It's mutually-assured
destruction.
385
00:15:43,855 --> 00:15:46,075
The only thing that's been
destroyed is my trust in you.
386
00:15:46,206 --> 00:15:49,035
I told you not to cross
the line, but you did.
387
00:15:49,122 --> 00:15:50,471
[Katja] I see now
I gave you too much credit.
388
00:15:50,558 --> 00:15:53,691
- You are incapable of change.
- That's unfair.
389
00:15:53,778 --> 00:15:55,780
I hope you get your transfer,
and I hope you get as far away
390
00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:57,608
from your daughter as possible,
391
00:15:57,695 --> 00:16:00,089
so you don't break her heart
like you have mine.
392
00:16:02,135 --> 00:16:04,920
This is goodbye, Colonel Quinn.
393
00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:06,704
Okay, that's a little...
394
00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:09,664
This is a perfectly good bug.
395
00:16:09,794 --> 00:16:12,579
Hey, Papadakis, cut out all that
stuff with me and Katja
396
00:16:12,580 --> 00:16:14,060
and just keep
all the really cool stuff
397
00:16:14,147 --> 00:16:15,148
I said to the general, okay?
398
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,159
You win.
399
00:16:26,246 --> 00:16:27,595
You have your transfer,
anywhere you want.
400
00:16:27,682 --> 00:16:28,508
I'll make it happen.
401
00:16:28,509 --> 00:16:30,032
General, wait.
402
00:16:31,729 --> 00:16:33,079
You want scotch?
403
00:16:34,602 --> 00:16:36,169
Mm, sure.
404
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:40,608
Been a while
since we've done this.
405
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:42,218
Let me ask you something.
406
00:16:44,829 --> 00:16:46,744
Why'd you send me here?
407
00:16:47,745 --> 00:16:49,616
I wanted you to retire.
408
00:16:49,617 --> 00:16:52,881
I mean, back when we were,
well, not friends, but not this,
409
00:16:52,968 --> 00:16:55,449
you told me
over a glass of scotch
410
00:16:55,536 --> 00:16:59,496
that every time you got close
to someone, you ran away.
411
00:16:59,627 --> 00:17:02,629
So, what, you thought
I was gonna just...
412
00:17:02,630 --> 00:17:05,850
leave the service,
run away from my daughter?
413
00:17:05,937 --> 00:17:09,115
I-isn't that
what you're doing now?
414
00:17:09,202 --> 00:17:12,422
Anyway, just, uh, let me know
where you wanna go,
415
00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:14,033
and I'll send you there.
416
00:17:16,122 --> 00:17:19,081
Oh, and, um, for the record,
417
00:17:19,168 --> 00:17:21,213
I don't actually pay the women
for sex.
418
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:25,609
Just for sitting on... cake,
419
00:17:25,740 --> 00:17:30,527
on balloons, glass tables.
It's not even really sexual.
420
00:17:30,614 --> 00:17:33,226
- Well, not at first.
- You don't have to explain it.
421
00:17:33,313 --> 00:17:36,359
Uh, well, you know, no.
I don't have anyone to tell.
422
00:17:36,446 --> 00:17:40,319
And it really feels good
to, uh, to share.
423
00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:43,105
It started
back at my tenth birthday.
424
00:17:43,192 --> 00:17:45,238
My mom's friend Dolores came,
425
00:17:45,325 --> 00:17:50,286
and, oh, my God,
she had a body for sitting on.
426
00:17:51,592 --> 00:17:54,812
S-s-sumptuous.
427
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,120
[indistinct song]
428
00:18:00,427 --> 00:18:04,779
Okay, everybody, it's time to
move outside for the fireworks!
429
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:08,043
And whoever is the owner
of the black Mercedes-AMG
430
00:18:08,130 --> 00:18:11,829
parked outside,
I'll be by the beech tree.
431
00:18:11,916 --> 00:18:13,918
[instrumental music]
432
00:18:15,790 --> 00:18:18,619
[Jan] Okay, everybody, Jan and
the Springstreets will continue
433
00:18:18,706 --> 00:18:21,709
after the fireworks.
Go out, see the lights.
434
00:18:27,628 --> 00:18:29,760
Hey.
435
00:18:29,847 --> 00:18:31,110
Not now, colonel. Ahem.
436
00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:32,501
The fireworks
are about to start.
437
00:18:32,502 --> 00:18:33,851
Don't you wanna be
out there for 'em?
438
00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:35,722
I'm good. Leave me alone.
439
00:18:35,723 --> 00:18:37,159
[sniffles]
440
00:18:42,077 --> 00:18:43,600
- You all right?
- Dad.
441
00:18:43,731 --> 00:18:46,212
What's wrong? Um...
442
00:18:46,299 --> 00:18:47,169
- Anything I can help you with?
- No.
443
00:18:47,300 --> 00:18:50,085
I don't get the dad who helps.
444
00:18:50,172 --> 00:18:52,870
I get the dad
who makes everything worse.
445
00:18:55,612 --> 00:18:56,918
Okay, well...
446
00:18:58,746 --> 00:19:00,922
maybe I don't wanna be
that dad anymore.
447
00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:10,801
You can stay if you don't say
anything or do anything.
448
00:19:12,890 --> 00:19:16,459
We both know I can be that dad.
449
00:19:16,546 --> 00:19:18,896
- [fireworks exploding]
- [crowd cheering]
450
00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:22,465
I do love fireworks.
451
00:19:22,552 --> 00:19:26,034
Who do you think put the first
Roman candle in your hand?
452
00:19:28,558 --> 00:19:32,258
Six was way too young for that,
by the way.
453
00:19:32,345 --> 00:19:34,260
You have all your fingers.
454
00:19:36,436 --> 00:19:38,394
I know
that Katja broke up with you.
455
00:19:40,091 --> 00:19:41,789
How do you know that?
456
00:19:41,876 --> 00:19:43,660
Mom texted me.
457
00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:45,662
How does mom know?
458
00:19:45,749 --> 00:19:50,798
Katja's on her way to the Quinn
family ex-wife vacation.
459
00:19:50,885 --> 00:19:53,583
You gotta be kidding me. Great.
So now there's four of them.
460
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:55,672
It's like I'm starting
a basketball team
461
00:19:55,759 --> 00:19:59,676
of brilliant women who hate
my guts. The team's complete.
462
00:19:59,807 --> 00:20:02,984
Abe's ex told me she wants
to transfer to Stroopsdorf.
463
00:20:03,071 --> 00:20:04,593
And she hates my guts already.
464
00:20:04,594 --> 00:20:06,029
But she's just gonna
465
00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:08,163
make my life living hell.
466
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,385
There's some things
you could do about it.
467
00:20:13,386 --> 00:20:15,779
You could deny her
on-base housing,
468
00:20:15,910 --> 00:20:18,521
make her a roping instructor,
force them into long-distance,
469
00:20:18,608 --> 00:20:20,174
put her in charge
of cheese coagulation,
470
00:20:20,175 --> 00:20:22,438
make her smell like rancid milk.
471
00:20:23,700 --> 00:20:27,834
That's... too much.
472
00:20:27,835 --> 00:20:29,706
Yeah, it is 'cause she doesn't
need to be in charge.
473
00:20:29,837 --> 00:20:32,491
She'd smell like rancid milk
a lot longer
474
00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:34,972
if she had to start at
the bottom and work her way up,
475
00:20:35,059 --> 00:20:36,974
'cause then we-we got her
in there, like, for at least
476
00:20:37,061 --> 00:20:39,760
a year, maybe a year and a half, right?
477
00:20:39,847 --> 00:20:41,283
Right.
478
00:20:41,414 --> 00:20:43,894
They'd be calling her Stinky
by then.
479
00:20:43,981 --> 00:20:45,331
[both laughing]
480
00:20:47,420 --> 00:20:51,859
Yeah, well, I never thought
I would say this, but...
481
00:20:55,558 --> 00:20:58,822
I am really glad
that you're here, dad.
482
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,220
[fireworks exploding]
483
00:21:06,961 --> 00:21:08,441
I'm not going anywhere.
484
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:13,446
[fireworks exploding]
485
00:21:19,190 --> 00:21:22,716
♪ I'm a Bruce Springsteen
sweaty hero man ♪
486
00:21:22,803 --> 00:21:26,981
♪ But America
just doesn't understand ♪
487
00:21:27,111 --> 00:21:29,026
♪ That I sing
about your working class ♪
488
00:21:29,113 --> 00:21:31,986
♪ In a gravelly rasp
but in reality ♪
489
00:21:32,116 --> 00:21:35,119
♪ I'm a billionaire
under the globalist command ♪
490
00:21:35,206 --> 00:21:38,775
♪ Conceived in the continental
United States ♪
491
00:21:38,862 --> 00:21:43,650
♪ I was conceived in
the continental United States ♪
492
00:21:43,780 --> 00:21:46,783
♪ Conceived in the continental
United States ♪
493
00:21:46,914 --> 00:21:51,265
♪ I was conceived in
the continental United States ♪
494
00:21:51,266 --> 00:21:52,354
♪ Yeah
495
00:21:52,485 --> 00:21:54,530
[children] It's going so well!
37701
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