Original subtitles

Now die!

What? Who the hell are you?

I'm Inquisitor Mizarisa.

Ya can't kill my wonderful bed-wetter!

Wait, it's you?!

"Knife vs. Saw"

I'll protect ya, Hiro.

Wh-Why are you here?

That's right! Why is an inquisitor helping Hiro?

Well, ya know Hiro was cleared of all charges.

City Guard Captain Tesla decided so himself.

Tesla holds absolute judicial authority.

Everyone in town knows that.

Which means...

If ya insist on harming Hiro despite Tesla's decision,

you'll wind up facing my judgement!

Wow! All right Mizarisa!

This might end the whole confrontation...

Wait, how did you know I was being attacked here?

Sorry, Hiro.

The truth is, I was following you in hopes of interacting with you more.

What? You mean I was being tailed?

I didn't notice at all!

Never underestimate an inquisitor!

Does she maybe have a special tracking skill?

Hiro, I really think you should let her join your party.

Hmm. Maybe I should...

We got off to a rocky start,

but I do seem to have made a favorable impression...

If she even has a special skill, then...

I have a great sense of smell.

So I just followed the smell of your pee here!

Wh-What kind of skill is that?

And is the pee smell really that strong?

I kept quiet to spare your feelings, but it's a powerful ammonia stench.

Enough to gag on, actually.

You should have said something!

Not knowing is worse!

This game prizes realism.

It's not like a comic strip where things magically reset.

The smell of urine won't just conveniently disappear.

Oh, I see!

I'll make sure to change my pants after this!

Damn. I almost had him.

Are you crazy?

Why'd ya just attack Hiro?

Did ya not hear what I said?

That's right. I didn't hear.

No one told me anything.

In other words, I'm just executing the murderer Hiro and his apparent accomplice.

I won't learn that Hiro was cleared until later.

You're gonna play dumb and kill both me and Mizarisa?

That's some pretty great crazy.

Fine. Go on and try it.

As if a little town lassie could take out a specially trained inquisitor.

Splatter her brains!

Hey, isn't that overkill?

Huh?

She's gone!

Th-That's crazy!

Where'd she go?

There! She's up there!

What kind of childhood friend is she?! A ninja?! Her physical abilities are unreal!

Kill! Kill! Kill!

I'll slice you both up!

There! We're safe!

N-Now she has two!

And where was she keeping them?!

I see I underestimated you.

I'll get serious.

I won't let ya kill Hiro.

Mizarisa...

I think I really want her to join!

The truth is, what I said earlier was a pretext.

I'll tell ya my real reason for protecting Hiro.

Your real reason?

The man only truly shines after ya put the hurt on 'im!

Huh?

What did you--

I wanna torment him within an inch of death!

I wanna sever his limbs, crush his eyes, and see him covered in his own filth!

Oh, what a great accident!

My spine tingles at the thought!

Excuse me?!

What's this chick saying?!

She's just as crazy as Alicia!

If ya kill Hiro, he'll never have another accident!

What's so funny?

You have power, but you're slow.

And with such a worn-out saw,

can you really stop my attacks?

Y-You freak!

I'll show you my Chopping Apples

and mince you up!

C-Crap! She's on the defensive!

I think she's aiming for something.

She's like a boxer aiming for a counter.

Your attacks are fast, but they're simplistic!

With the right timing, I can parry them!

Wow!

Mizarisa's training must make her more proficient in battle!

Now die!

N-No way!

You focused your attacks high

to open the middle for a kick?

As a knife wielder? You frea--

Mizarisa!

Don't worry. She's only unconscious.

I'll kill her later. So don't worry.

But you, Hiro...

I'm killing you first!

I-It's all over!

Alicia's too strong and too freaky!

I'm toast! No way can I beat this childhood friend!

Fighting won't work. So figure out how to win without fighting.

Fighting won't work... so I need to...

Hiro.

Hiro.

Hiro!

Hiro! I'll buy you time to run!

I just sensed something.

Hiro, might you have the protection of a fairy?

Better protect my eyes this time, huh?

H-Hey! That's...

Hiro, just run! Head for the center of town!

Hiro?

If you were some dude's childhood friend, what would throw you off the most?

I got it, Kamui.

What throws off absolutely any girl, whether in 2D, 3D, or a full dive RPG.

That's...

There! Take this!

No!

Is that what you pictured?

Huh?

Wha-Wha-Wha--?

How stupid can you be?

At my age?

Like I've never had a guy grab my boobs!

They're oddly realistic about this!

Don't feel triumphant over a boob squeeze, you virgin asshole!

Oh my. I only kicked you half as hard as the saw girl. How pathetic.

Now, this time it's really the end, Hiro.

Hiro, run!

I-I can't move!

Why?

Was the kick that strong?

Hiro. Join me on the other side!

And Martin Time is in progress, too!

I feel it!

I feel my brother's presence!

Brother! I'm avenging you and killing Hiro!

Kill him, Alicia!

Kill Hiro!

Okay, game over. Checkmate. I'm completely done for!

Hiro, don't give up!

"Auberdine Walkthrough" my ass!

Stupid damned site!

I thought as hard as I could!

Wait. Hold on. Is that really what he said?

"If you were the childhood friend,"

He meant what Alicia specifically would hate?

So that would mean... uh... um...

This is the end.

Hiro! Die!

I-I love you!

Excuse me? What is this crap?

Alicia! I-I love you!

I'm telling you it's too late for this trick--

No! I'm serious! I mean it! I really love you!

Wh-What are you...

I-It's working!

Good job, Hiro!

A love confession from the man you hate enough to kill! That's a doozy!

Wh-What?

Hiro's saying he loves me?!

You're lying! Bastard!

I'm not lying! I've loved you for a long, long time!

I love all of you!

I can't live without you!

Marry me! Be my miso soup!

I wanna have your babies!

What?

What's going on?

You really...

What's happening?

All right! Just a little more!

Alicia! Please, let's stop this! Let's get along like we used to!

Too late.

Huh?

It's too late! It's too late! It's too late!

All of this is too late!

I love you, too, Hiro!

My brother and I both loved you so much...

And yet...

How could you do that?

L-Like I said before, it was an accident and--

You keep saying that!

You say it wasn't on purpose!

But that tragedy only happened because you said you were leaving the city!

It's all your fault!

You ruined our lives, Hiro!

B-But I...

Someone died! A person died!

What's more, it was my beloved brother!

So...

So why?

Why?

Why did you run away?

You did it!

Your quick thinking avoided the death flag!

I-I...

Oh? What's wrong?

I've realized I've been wrong this whole time.

Hiro...

I just thought of everything as part of a game.

I don't have any memories of Alicia or of Martin.

But to them, and especially to Alicia,

I'm a close friend they've known since childhood.

And I killed her brother.

Then, of all things,

I ran away.

I didn't grieve or try to save him.

I just got scared and ran.

That was the greatest sin I committed.

I really suck, don't I?

Now, now. Don't get so serious.

At the end of the day, she's an NPC.

Ah, ow.

I've never met a girl that strong.

Thanks, Mizarisa.

No, no. I don't need any thanks.

Instead...

Could I cut off just a pinky finger?

Absolutely not.

I take my thanks back. Leave.

What?!

We'll need to visit a blacksmith.

More importantly, do you know of the Kenura tree?

What?

The Kenura tree.

It's just south of here. A big tree on a small hill.

Could you wait for a bit?

Hiro, do you...

...need to pee?

No.

Just wait here, please.

Martin, you're here, right?

Come out.

Hiro.

Martin. You came.

You're not startled?

I guess I'm kinda used to it now.

Are you ready to die?

I'm afraid not.

But I do want to say something.

I wanted to earnestly apologize, but I have no words.

What do I even say?

Dammit.

Kamui,

I'm a dumb turd, so I don't know!

What would you say right now?

It was right there written in the walkthrough!

Think back, dimwit!

I see.

It was so curt I didn't really take the words in.

But you were actually giving me advice.

You don't have to forgive me.

But...

...please come with me.

Martin, let's go together.

Brother, help! Hiro won't stop chasing me!

Hey, Hiro, don't tease Alicia so much.

I's sorry.

I done got carried away, I did.

Hang on! Why am I the only one who sounds like a big doofus?

Brother! Actually scold Hiro!

Let it go, Alicia. He's sorry. Right, Hiro?

I's deeply sorry, deeper than the see.

Hmph! You always go soft on Hiro.

Well, Hiro and I are friends.

Nope. We's more than friends!

Me and you be best friends!

You're right. We are best friends.

Yup, yup! We's friends forever!

Hiro, you and I are...

Yeah! Me and you be...

You and I...

We's best friends forever.

That's right, Hiro. Those are the words of our promise.

H-Hold on! You're disappearing?

Yeah.

You can't! I said I'm taking you with me!

I heard you loud and clear.

Then come with me!

Martin Time is over now.

Hiro. Thanks, man.

Hiro.

Reona.

You were watching?

Yes. Sorry.

I see.

No, it's fine.

It's okay.

But Martin...

Martin is...

I was watching the whole time, but...

I can't see Martin,

or hear him either.

So...

You looked like a creepy weirdo muttering to himself in the park!

Hey! What the hell?

More importantly, look!

It's glowing!

"More importantly?!" You--

"Best Best Friend Killer: The Best Amicide"?

H-Huh? What the hell does that mean?

Don't look so down!

You got a lovely title, and you're free of Martin's haunting, right?

Be happier!

Yeah, but there's still Alicia...

You can clear that up next time. You can do it now, Hiro.

You think so?

Yes!

So let's take the rusty sword to the blacksmith.

And let's buy you fresher-smelling pants.

Ah! I'd forgotten!

Oh, Hiro.

Are those church bells?

What's happening?

Wh-What's going on here?

I-I don't know.

I've never seen an event like this.

The city of Ted is on fire?!

Episode 7: Chance of Survival 0.1%.