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1
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[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
2
00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:05,130
[♪ music fades]
3
00:00:05,338 --> 00:00:07,716
A wheel to practice
my spell casting.
4
00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:10,051
Did I just make studying fun?
5
00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:12,053
I think I did.
6
00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:18,393
Spell that begins with horse.
Uh, easy!
7
00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:20,729
"Horse that draws
a four-wheel wagon,
8
00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:22,439
"summon me the egg of a dragon."
9
00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:26,860
And your new Battle of the Wands
champion is…
10
00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:28,194
-Billie!
-Exactly.
11
00:00:29,487 --> 00:00:30,530
Oh, hey, Justin.
12
00:00:31,239 --> 00:00:33,366
Are you practicing spells
on a Saturday?
13
00:00:33,575 --> 00:00:37,704
[chuckles] I am impressed!
And suspicious. What's going on?
14
00:00:38,246 --> 00:00:40,999
[sighs] Okay, look,
tonight is Battle of the Wands,
15
00:00:41,082 --> 00:00:42,459
and I know
what you're gonna say.
16
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,045
[both] "Battle of the Wands
is nothing but an underground,
17
00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:48,673
"unregulated, unsafe gathering
of magical hooligans."
18
00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:52,677
[sighs] Billie,
you are my responsibility.
19
00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:54,471
You are not going
to Battle of the Wands.
20
00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:55,847
-But…
-If you do,
21
00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:57,307
you'll lose your phone
for two weeks.
22
00:00:58,975 --> 00:01:00,727
And get rid of that dragon egg
before it hatches.
23
00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:02,812
Our smoke alarm goes off
when we burn popcorn.
24
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:08,651
[exhales] This is what I get
for telling the truth.
25
00:01:08,985 --> 00:01:10,612
Well,
I'm never doing that again.
26
00:01:15,700 --> 00:01:17,077
[♪ theme song playing]
27
00:01:17,202 --> 00:01:19,913
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
28
00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:21,706
♪ When you can have
what you want ♪
29
00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:23,875
♪ By the simplest of means ♪
30
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,753
♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪
31
00:01:26,878 --> 00:01:31,299
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
32
00:01:31,382 --> 00:01:33,635
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪
33
00:01:33,718 --> 00:01:36,429
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
34
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:38,181
♪ Yes, please ♪
35
00:01:40,058 --> 00:01:41,518
-♪ What it seems ♪
-[♪ theme song concludes]
36
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Let me get this straight.
Mr. Russo said
37
00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:49,192
you can't go to a dangerous
underground magic battle?
38
00:01:49,317 --> 00:01:50,318
Crazy, right?
39
00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:52,320
Crazy that you thought
he would let you!
40
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:53,613
He's Mr. Russo.
41
00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:55,490
He makes his groceries
wear seat belts.
42
00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,535
But I have to go
to Battle of the Wands.
43
00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:01,704
If I win that trophy,
I'll show everyone back at home
44
00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:03,957
that I'm not just a screw-up
who couldn't cut it at WizTech.
45
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:05,416
-Then you should go.
-But if I go,
46
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:06,960
Justin will be really mad.
47
00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,753
-Then you shouldn't go.
-But if I don't,
48
00:02:08,837 --> 00:02:10,547
then everybody will just think
I'm a screw-up.
49
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,257
-Then you should go.
-But if I do go--
50
00:02:12,423 --> 00:02:14,175
Billie, we both know
this is happening.
51
00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:17,095
Let me just grab my go bag.
52
00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:19,180
Wait,
you keep a go bag in my room?
53
00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:22,976
Of course. Unless we're staying.
Then it's a stay bag.
54
00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:24,686
It also has my jammies in it.
55
00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:27,564
Okay, then yes, we're doing it,
56
00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,524
but we just need
someone to cover for us.
57
00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,860
Someone who doesn't have
any plans on a Saturday night.
58
00:02:31,943 --> 00:02:32,944
Hey, guys.
59
00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:35,697
Roman. [chuckles]
60
00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:38,116
Winter and I need to go
to an underground wizard battle,
61
00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:39,534
but your dad said I can't go,
62
00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:41,494
so I need you to make it look
like we're still here.
63
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:43,580
Underground wizard battle, huh?
64
00:02:43,705 --> 00:02:45,665
[hesitates] Is it just wizards,
or will all types
65
00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:47,458
of magical beings
be at this event?
66
00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:50,587
What do you care? You don't know
anyone in the wizard world.
67
00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:51,796
Except…
68
00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:57,302
Oh, you want to see Iggy,
that pixie girl from my party.
69
00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,679
-[in high-pitched voice] Ooh!
-[in high-pitched voice] Ooh!
70
00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:02,432
No, I don't. I mean,
71
00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:04,475
unless she's going to be there.
She probably won't be there.
72
00:03:04,559 --> 00:03:06,019
Do you think
she's going to be there?
73
00:03:06,644 --> 00:03:09,022
-Probably.
-Then I'd also like to be there
74
00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:12,567
-to cheer you on.
-[smacks lips] Aw.
75
00:03:13,234 --> 00:03:15,695
Well, if Roman's not gonna
cover for us, who will?
76
00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:17,113
Sure, I'll cover for you.
77
00:03:18,114 --> 00:03:20,909
-Wow, thanks, Milo.
-But it's gonna cost you.
78
00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:23,953
Set us up just to take us down.
79
00:03:24,078 --> 00:03:26,289
I'd be proud if you weren't
using it against us.
80
00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:28,875
All right, Milo,
what do you want?
81
00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,628
-An ice pop.
-That's it?
82
00:03:31,794 --> 00:03:33,880
[scoffs] You do know
I'm a wizard, right?
83
00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:35,089
I can conjure anything.
84
00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:37,634
Then a blue one
shouldn't be a problem.
85
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:43,306
[♪ upbeat instrumental music
playing on TV]
86
00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:47,101
[sobs, sniffles]
87
00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:48,603
Why are you crying?
88
00:03:48,686 --> 00:03:50,688
That man came
all the way from the future
89
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,065
just to find that woman,
90
00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:55,235
and she wants nothing
to do with him. [sobs, sniffles]
91
00:03:55,526 --> 00:03:58,154
He's a robot
sent to terminate her.
92
00:03:58,279 --> 00:04:01,115
Oh, I really have to stop
looking at my phone
93
00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:02,367
when we watch movies.
94
00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:03,826
-[phone chimes]
-[chuckles] Ooh!
95
00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:09,707
Battle of the Wands
starts in less than an hour.
96
00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:12,001
If I don't get there in time,
all the spots will be taken.
97
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,586
Don't worry, I got this.
98
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:16,047
[mechanical whirring on TV]
99
00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:18,466
Whoa! That robot's jacked!
100
00:04:18,549 --> 00:04:20,718
Dad, why don't you have
muscles like that?
101
00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:25,265
Milo, this movie
is inappropriate for you.
102
00:04:25,473 --> 00:04:26,641
Where are you going?
103
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:28,559
To the bathroom.
104
00:04:28,726 --> 00:04:32,939
But you can't until I show you
this new dance move I made up.
105
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:38,903
What is happening right now?
106
00:04:39,779 --> 00:04:41,322
This is your fault
for telling him
107
00:04:41,406 --> 00:04:43,199
he could do anything
he sets his mind to.
108
00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:46,995
-No, don't leave!
-Why? What's wrong?
109
00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:51,207
I just remembered
that everybody eventually dies.
110
00:04:51,374 --> 00:04:56,087
-Oh, boy.
-[wails, sobs]
111
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:58,715
Well, I feel better.
112
00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:01,718
If you need me,
I'll be in my room.
113
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,803
So will Billie and Roman.
All in our rooms.
114
00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:07,390
Should we be worried about him?
115
00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:09,142
I think it'd be weird
if we weren't.
116
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:11,311
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
117
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[♪ music fades]
118
00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:22,322
Welcome to Battle of the Wands!
119
00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:25,074
Why was Mr. Russo so worried
about you coming here?
120
00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,200
[gasps] Duck!
121
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:29,495
Okay, starting to see it.
122
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,373
If you'll excuse me… [exhales]
123
00:05:32,457 --> 00:05:35,376
…I have to go find Iggy
and tell her that I like her.
124
00:05:39,088 --> 00:05:40,506
You're still standing here.
125
00:05:41,424 --> 00:05:43,801
Yeah, it just occurred to me
that she might not like me back.
126
00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:46,137
There's only one way
to find out.
127
00:05:46,220 --> 00:05:48,931
-Just go talk to her.
-Right. [exhales sharply]
128
00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:53,436
-Are you gonna go?
-I don't think so.
129
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,358
-Do you need us to stay?
-I would rather you didn't.
130
00:06:00,651 --> 00:06:02,362
Hi, I'm here
to sign up for the battle.
131
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:07,283
[groans] No spots left?
What do I do now?
132
00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:08,910
Well, well, well.
133
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:11,829
If it isn't the screw-up
who couldn't cut it at WizTech.
134
00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:14,916
-Hey, that's not nice.
-That's why I said it.
135
00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:18,544
-What do you want, Xander?
-It's not what I want.
136
00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:19,921
It's what I'm gonna do.
137
00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:21,923
I'm gonna win
the Battle of the Wands,
138
00:06:22,006 --> 00:06:24,342
and it's gonna be Xantastic!
139
00:06:24,425 --> 00:06:26,344
This girl knows
what I'm talking about.
140
00:06:26,427 --> 00:06:27,470
I don't.
141
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:32,100
-"Xantastic" is not even a word.
-It is when I say it.
142
00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,435
Have fun
watching me take the trophy.
143
00:06:36,020 --> 00:06:39,357
Joke's on you. We definitely
will not have fun doing that.
144
00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:42,610
Gotta find a way
into the competition.
145
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:45,029
And then we gotta work
on your comebacks.
146
00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:47,073
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
147
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,244
[♪ music fades]
148
00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:53,704
There must be a way to get
into Battle of the Wands.
149
00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:56,541
But there are no more spots.
Maybe we should just go.
150
00:06:56,624 --> 00:06:59,127
No. The whole reason
I came here is to prove
151
00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:02,046
that I'm not just the screw-up
who couldn't cut it at WizTech.
152
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:04,090
Look, if I leave
without winning,
153
00:07:04,173 --> 00:07:06,843
-that's all I'll ever be.
-Then I got your back. [inhales]
154
00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:08,052
But that's all I can offer,
155
00:07:08,136 --> 00:07:09,804
'cause I don't know
how things work here.
156
00:07:11,013 --> 00:07:13,266
[gasps] There's MC.
Maybe he'll help.
157
00:07:14,475 --> 00:07:15,977
-Excuse me?
-[snorts]
158
00:07:16,060 --> 00:07:19,313
Whoa! Sorry, I meant to say…
Yikes!
159
00:07:20,481 --> 00:07:21,482
What do you want?
160
00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:23,484
The battle's starting
in ten minutes.
161
00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:26,028
[groans] Listen,
I didn't get a spot in time.
162
00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:28,614
-Any chance you could get me in?
-Talk to the hand.
163
00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,741
That's rude and dated.
164
00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:34,454
[smacks lips] No, the hand.
He runs this thing.
165
00:07:36,038 --> 00:07:38,958
If you get his signature,
I'll put you on the list.
166
00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:45,756
Man, for a guy with no feet,
that hand is fast.
167
00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:47,508
Okay, we gotta find it.
168
00:07:47,758 --> 00:07:49,385
-[gasps] I have an idea.
-Huh?
169
00:07:50,928 --> 00:07:53,181
-What are you doing?
-He's a hand.
170
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:56,058
Hands can't resist a high five.
Everybody knows that.
171
00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,436
I'm gonna go look for him.
172
00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:05,443
You're right.
I think that might work.
173
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:07,570
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
174
00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:10,281
[♪ music fades]
175
00:08:10,364 --> 00:08:12,366
Hey, Milo,
have you seen Billie and Roman?
176
00:08:12,533 --> 00:08:15,578
Uh, yep.
Been seeing them all day.
177
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:18,080
That's why I'm down here.
Getting the snacks.
178
00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:19,957
A single cheese stick?
179
00:08:20,416 --> 00:08:23,461
Yep. We're playing this game
where we all peel a strip off
180
00:08:23,544 --> 00:08:25,171
and see who gets
the longest one. [chuckles]
181
00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:26,839
It's fun and delicious.
182
00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:30,301
That's a lot of hands
on one stick of cheese.
183
00:08:31,552 --> 00:08:34,305
[exhales] Well, good talk, Dad.
184
00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:35,973
Wait a minute.
185
00:08:37,975 --> 00:08:39,644
You can't just eat cheese
for dinner.
186
00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:40,937
Why don't we all go out?
187
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:43,564
Oh, that's a great idea!
I'll get us a table for five.
188
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:44,649
Five?
189
00:08:45,441 --> 00:08:46,442
I don't know.
190
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:48,444
It's kind of hard to get
a table for an odd number.
191
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:49,654
How about just us three?
192
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:53,199
We're not leaving
Billie and Roman behind.
193
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:56,410
-I'll go get them.
-No, no. Don't. I'll do it.
194
00:08:56,744 --> 00:08:59,205
You get the reservation.
I'll gather the children.
195
00:09:01,415 --> 00:09:03,251
[exhales]
Man, it's hard having parents
196
00:09:03,334 --> 00:09:05,253
that want to spend time
with their kids.
197
00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:11,175
Uh, excuse me, I'm… I'm…
I'm looking for someone.
198
00:09:11,259 --> 00:09:14,887
Her name's Iggy. She's yay high,
blonde hair, big, beautiful eyes
199
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:16,847
that sparkle when she smiles.
Not that I've noticed.
200
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:18,057
I'm not weird.
201
00:09:20,017 --> 00:09:22,979
[exhales] Here, hand. Here, boy.
202
00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:25,022
Man, where is he?
I've looked everywhere.
203
00:09:25,147 --> 00:09:28,359
Oh. Well, look no further.
You found him. [chuckles softly]
204
00:09:28,776 --> 00:09:31,028
-Who are you?
-Um, hello,
205
00:09:31,112 --> 00:09:35,032
Nigel Dragonberry,
Ultimate Spellmaster, 2007.
206
00:09:35,116 --> 00:09:36,325
I've won Battle of the Wands
207
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,536
more times
than any wizard in history.
208
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:41,122
-[chuckles] Wow, that's awesome.
-Yeah, it is.
209
00:09:41,205 --> 00:09:43,666
People are still
talking about me. [chuckles]
210
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,710
Not that much
in the last 15 years,
211
00:09:45,793 --> 00:09:48,212
but back in '07, I was the man.
212
00:09:49,547 --> 00:09:51,507
See, this is what
I was telling Winter.
213
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,134
If I win Battle of the Wands,
214
00:09:53,217 --> 00:09:54,969
it'll change the way
everyone thinks of me.
215
00:09:55,052 --> 00:09:57,680
Yeah, it will. I get respect.
216
00:09:58,097 --> 00:09:59,849
Not so much
in the last 15 years,
217
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:02,226
but back in '07, I was the man!
218
00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:06,063
So, what's happened
the last 15 years?
219
00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:07,231
Not a lot.
220
00:10:07,773 --> 00:10:10,526
-But back in '07--
-I know, you were the man.
221
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,654
Yeah, I was! [chuckles]
222
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:15,865
By the way, I'm counting
this little chit-chat
223
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,617
as a meet-and-greet.
That'll be five bucks.
224
00:10:17,742 --> 00:10:19,619
[hesitates]
you're charging me five bucks?
225
00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:22,246
Unless you want a picture.
That'll cost you ten.
226
00:10:23,372 --> 00:10:26,417
Smile. You're in a picture
with Nigel Dragonberry.
227
00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:29,670
-[camera shutter clicks]
-[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
228
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,422
[♪ music fades]
229
00:10:31,505 --> 00:10:33,007
Come on, kids. Time to go.
230
00:10:33,090 --> 00:10:35,259
We're going to be late
for our reservation.
231
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,053
[in higher-pitched voice]
Just a second.
232
00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:38,929
I'm finishing my girl make-up.
233
00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:41,349
Girl make-up?
234
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:43,726
All she has up there
is sunscreen and lip balm.
235
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:47,897
What's taking Roman so long?
Hey, uh, Roman?
236
00:10:50,149 --> 00:10:51,901
[in raspy voice] Uh,
this is Roman Russo.
237
00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:53,235
How can I help you?
238
00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:56,405
Are you okay? You sound strange.
239
00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:57,907
Yep. I just have a little…
240
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,533
[breaks voice]
…puberty going on.
241
00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:06,040
That doesn't sound like Roman.
242
00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:09,210
Yeah, he usually calls puberty
"the big change."
243
00:11:14,423 --> 00:11:15,591
[Justin] Boys?
244
00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:17,802
[whispering emphatically]
Showtime!
245
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,681
What is taking so long?
246
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:23,599
[scoffs] Is that Billie?
247
00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:25,851
[in normal voice]
Why, yes, it is.
248
00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:27,353
And I'm glad you think so.
249
00:11:31,023 --> 00:11:34,485
-Why is she asleep?
-That's a good question.
250
00:11:35,152 --> 00:11:37,488
-Where is Roman?
-Oh, I know that one!
251
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:40,116
He's getting dressed
in the closet.
252
00:11:40,282 --> 00:11:42,076
How's it going in there, Roman?
253
00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:49,458
Well, this makes a lot of sense.
254
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:52,044
I, um… I guess we're just
going to have to go
255
00:11:52,128 --> 00:11:54,547
to the Pasta Palace
without the kids.
256
00:11:54,630 --> 00:11:57,258
Wait, you never said anything
about the Pasta Palace!
257
00:11:57,341 --> 00:11:58,426
I want to go!
258
00:12:04,014 --> 00:12:06,851
To be honest, it lasted longer
than I thought it would.
259
00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:08,477
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
260
00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:13,607
-[♪ music fades]
-Billie! Check it out!
261
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:16,444
-I got the hand's signature!
-Thanks, Winter.
262
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:18,988
Yep, Operation High Five
paid off. [inhales]
263
00:12:19,321 --> 00:12:21,699
Now, it's time
for Operation Hand Sanitizer.
264
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:24,869
-Let's go get you in the battle.
-[background chattering]
265
00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:28,372
-Right, the battle.
-Isn't that what you wanted?
266
00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:31,834
Uh, yeah, that's what I wanted.
267
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:33,002
Guys, guys! [pants]
268
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:36,005
I just met a wizard who took me
to the multiverse where I saw
269
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:38,507
every possible outcome
of me running into Iggy.
270
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:40,885
In one of them,
I sneezed in her face.
271
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:45,055
-Ooh, that's bad.
-No, no. That was the best one.
272
00:12:47,141 --> 00:12:48,350
There you are!
273
00:12:48,976 --> 00:12:51,353
Also, in every timeline,
we were busted by Dad.
274
00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:54,231
Next time, lead with that.
275
00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:02,156
I can't believe you all snuck
out into the wizard world.
276
00:13:02,239 --> 00:13:04,074
[sighs] Justin,
it's not their fault.
277
00:13:04,158 --> 00:13:05,659
They… they came to help me.
278
00:13:06,035 --> 00:13:08,871
If I'm being completely honest,
Dad, uh, I actually came here
279
00:13:08,954 --> 00:13:10,289
to find out if the pixie
280
00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:12,458
I met at Billie's house
party likes me.
281
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:15,544
-You had a house party?
-Roman, dude, stop talking.
282
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:19,089
-You are all in big trouble.
-Me too?
283
00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:20,508
Well, uh, no, not you,
284
00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:22,301
'cause if your parents
found out that you snuck out
285
00:13:22,384 --> 00:13:24,261
to the wizard world,
then I'd be in big trouble.
286
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:26,263
I know you.
287
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,724
You're Alex Russo's brother.
288
00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:33,437
-My name is Justin.
-Yeah, I know.
289
00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:35,689
But it's more fun to call you
Alex Russo's brother.
290
00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:37,441
You get all angry.
291
00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:41,320
-You know Nigel Dragonberry?
-Yeah.
292
00:13:41,403 --> 00:13:44,240
Alex used to compete against him
in Battle of the Wands.
293
00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:46,867
Why are you talking
to these losers, Dad?
294
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,454
Nigel's your dad?
Well, that makes sense.
295
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:52,790
You've got Nepo Wizard
written all over you.
296
00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:55,167
You're just jealous
297
00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:57,086
'cause I'm Xantastic
and you're not.
298
00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:59,171
"Xantastic"?
299
00:13:59,255 --> 00:14:01,298
He keeps trying
to make it a thing.
300
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:06,595
-Come on, kids. Let's just go.
-Oh, probably for the best.
301
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:08,764
If Alex Russo's brother
trained you,
302
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:11,141
you wouldn't stand
a chance against my son.
303
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:15,646
Hey, Alex Russo's brother
is a great teacher.
304
00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:17,523
It's Justin!
305
00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:20,025
And thank you.
306
00:14:21,151 --> 00:14:24,196
That's right, Billie. Walk away.
All you'll ever be
307
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,615
is the screw-up
who couldn't cut it at WizTech.
308
00:14:29,034 --> 00:14:32,329
-Hey, just ignore them.
-Why? Xander's right.
309
00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:34,832
Is that what you think?
310
00:14:35,082 --> 00:14:37,001
Because you got
kicked out of WizTech?
311
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,086
Just 'cause you screwed up,
312
00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:41,046
that does not make you
a screw-up.
313
00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:43,215
And just 'cause Nigel
won a competition,
314
00:14:43,299 --> 00:14:45,050
that does not make him a winner.
315
00:14:45,801 --> 00:14:48,345
Who you are is up to you.
316
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:50,431
Understand?
317
00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:52,683
[clicks tongue]
318
00:14:53,183 --> 00:14:55,019
Yeah. I think I do.
319
00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:58,397
But, taking down those jerks
320
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:00,733
would make me feel
so much better. [chuckles]
321
00:15:02,276 --> 00:15:05,195
Then let's take down
those jerks. All right.
322
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,699
Russos versus Dragonberrys.
323
00:15:08,824 --> 00:15:10,075
[hesitates, chuckles nervously]
Hi.
324
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:12,828
Just to be clear, Russos
does not include me, right?
325
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:15,247
-No.
-Sitting it out!
326
00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:17,541
-[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
-[crowd cheering]
327
00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:20,127
My fellow magical beings,
328
00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:22,463
we have a special treat
for you tonight.
329
00:15:22,546 --> 00:15:25,758
A Battle Royale of the Wands!
330
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:28,844
[crowd cheering, applauding]
331
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:35,225
We have
an Ultimate Spell Master,
332
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:39,563
two young wizards,
and Alex Russo's brother.
333
00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:43,484
-Does everyone call me that?
-Yes.
334
00:15:44,985 --> 00:15:47,988
You know the rules.
Each spell cast has to start
335
00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:50,616
with the last word
of your opponent's spell.
336
00:15:50,699 --> 00:15:56,246
-Let the battle begin!
-[crowd cheering, applauding]
337
00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,708
-Let's do this.
-[♪ music concludes]
338
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:03,045
Day by day I will not tire,
summon now a ball of fire!
339
00:16:03,128 --> 00:16:05,673
-[rumbling, crackling]
-[crowd gasping] Ooh!
340
00:16:06,674 --> 00:16:10,928
Fire here no longer glows,
from a rain cloud, water flows!
341
00:16:11,470 --> 00:16:13,222
[rumbling fades]
342
00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:16,850
-[crowd cheering, applauding]
-[chuckles]
343
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:19,687
Boom! Xantastic!
344
00:16:21,146 --> 00:16:23,524
No pressure, but these guys
are playing to win.
345
00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:24,858
That's all the pressure.
346
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,735
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
347
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:30,656
-[crowd cheering, applauding]
-Hammer!
348
00:16:30,906 --> 00:16:32,449
-Serpent!
-Cannonball!
349
00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:34,118
Lightning Blast!
350
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:38,497
[crowd exclaiming] Oh!
351
00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:45,587
[crowd cheering, applauding]
352
00:16:56,056 --> 00:16:57,182
[toy duck squeals]
353
00:16:58,726 --> 00:17:00,978
-[crowd cheering, applauding]
-[♪ music fades]
354
00:17:01,270 --> 00:17:04,523
-[cheers] Go, Dad.
-[cheers] Go, Billie.
355
00:17:04,940 --> 00:17:06,275
I'm glad you're having fun,
356
00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:07,901
even if you didn't meet up
with Iggy.
357
00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:11,989
Yeah. Maybe the universe didn't
want me to find her, you know?
358
00:17:12,072 --> 00:17:14,950
[hesitates] If it did, she'd be
standing right next to me.
359
00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:17,369
It's you.
360
00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:19,538
It's you.
361
00:17:19,955 --> 00:17:21,832
[sighs] Third-wheeling it again.
362
00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,044
Sandwich make!
363
00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:29,715
-[crowd exclaiming] Ooh.
-The word is make, easy.
364
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:32,885
I did a make spell
back in '04, and in '05…
365
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,720
[exhales deeply]
…and definitely in '07.
366
00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:39,349
Roman,
you snuck out of your house
367
00:17:39,433 --> 00:17:41,894
-just to find this girl.
-Aw, you did?
368
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:42,978
Uh-huh. [exhales]
369
00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:46,648
And you've been looking
for her all night?
370
00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:49,109
-Aw, you have?
-Uh-huh. [exhales]
371
00:17:50,778 --> 00:17:53,614
So, is there anything
you want to say to her?
372
00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:55,491
Uh-uh.
373
00:17:56,575 --> 00:17:59,536
Aw. Well, I "uh-uh" you, too.
374
00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:02,206
My job here is done.
375
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:04,374
I'm going to go check out
the merch table.
376
00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,878
I don't… I don't know
how it works in…
377
00:18:07,961 --> 00:18:10,547
in the… in the wizard world,
but us… us mortals, we…
378
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:12,341
we have these devices
that we can use to…
379
00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:13,425
to keep in touch.
380
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:14,927
Want me to put my number
in your phone?
381
00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:16,178
Yes, please.
382
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:19,223
Make appear with sight and sound
383
00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,558
an instrument
that's big and round.
384
00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:24,895
[crowd exclaiming]
385
00:18:24,978 --> 00:18:26,563
We need to figure out
a way to stump them.
386
00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:29,441
[gasps] I got it. Okay.
387
00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:31,902
Round me up a doll of plastic
388
00:18:31,985 --> 00:18:35,447
with party dress and hair,
fantastic.
389
00:18:36,865 --> 00:18:38,367
[crowd exclaims]
390
00:18:38,742 --> 00:18:39,952
Get ready to lose.
391
00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:43,831
Xantastic roar
and claws to fear,
392
00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:45,833
make a lion now appear.
393
00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:50,754
Why didn't the spell work?
394
00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:53,215
Because you said "Xantastic"
instead of "fantastic."
395
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:54,842
I told you that is not a word.
396
00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:58,178
I didn't mean to.
It's my catchphrase.
397
00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:00,180
Well, catchphrases are dumb,
and you would know that
398
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:02,432
if you were… the man.
399
00:19:03,725 --> 00:19:06,436
-[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
-And Billie and Justin win!
400
00:19:06,603 --> 00:19:10,691
[crowd cheering, applauding]
401
00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,609
[chuckles] Did you hear that?
402
00:19:12,734 --> 00:19:15,237
-Yeah, we won!
-No, he called me Justin!
403
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:20,576
[crowd cheering, applauding]
404
00:19:22,786 --> 00:19:24,037
[♪ music concludes]
405
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:26,790
Xander, that was pathetic.
406
00:19:26,874 --> 00:19:29,835
You are a disgrace
to the Dragonberry name.
407
00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:36,592
Here, Xander.
408
00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:39,052
Seems like you need this
more than I do.
409
00:19:39,761 --> 00:19:43,432
Really? Wow. Thanks, Billie.
410
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:47,769
Dad! Check it out!
411
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,981
Doesn't matter how I got it,
but we're leaving with a trophy!
412
00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:52,858
I love you, son.
413
00:19:57,654 --> 00:19:59,531
That was nice,
what you did there.
414
00:19:59,823 --> 00:20:01,950
Eh, a trophy
isn't gonna change anything.
415
00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:04,620
Also, I didn't think
he'd actually take it.
416
00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:06,371
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
417
00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:10,626
[♪ music fades]
418
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:13,587
I can't wait to wear this cool
"I survived the wizard world
419
00:20:13,670 --> 00:20:15,631
"and all I got
was this T-shirt," T-shirt.
420
00:20:16,256 --> 00:20:18,342
Yeah, you can't really
wear that around mortals
421
00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:20,385
or else everyone will know
about wizards.
422
00:20:20,510 --> 00:20:22,679
You're right.
I'll wear it inside out.
423
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,264
I'll know what it says.
424
00:20:25,140 --> 00:20:27,434
Well, thanks for the fun day
I'm not allowed to talk about.
425
00:20:31,521 --> 00:20:33,357
You know
what I'm gonna say next.
426
00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:34,650
I know.
427
00:20:34,816 --> 00:20:37,778
Just because I screwed up
doesn't make me a screw-up.
428
00:20:39,029 --> 00:20:40,197
Try again.
429
00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:43,492
You're taking our phones
for two weeks.
430
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:44,952
I thought I said a week.
431
00:20:45,118 --> 00:20:48,497
-No, you definitely said two.
-Billie, dude, stop talking.
432
00:20:50,624 --> 00:20:51,750
[cell phone chimes]
433
00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:54,461
Ah, you got a text
from someone named Iggy.
434
00:20:54,586 --> 00:20:56,296
Really? What does it say?
435
00:20:56,380 --> 00:20:58,799
Here, I'll show you.
In two weeks.
436
00:21:01,051 --> 00:21:02,094
I'm so full,
437
00:21:02,219 --> 00:21:04,304
I'm gonna be burping
butter noodles for a month.
438
00:21:04,805 --> 00:21:07,099
You guys went
to the Pasta Palace without me?
439
00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:08,350
We also got ice cream.
440
00:21:08,433 --> 00:21:10,852
Milo, dude, stop talking.
441
00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:13,146
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
442
00:21:14,064 --> 00:21:15,148
[♪ music concludes]
33721
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