Original subtitles

♪♪

Briggs: Raise your right hand and repeat after me.

We are drive-in mutants.

[Cheers and applause]

The drive-in will never die.

Audience: 3, 2, 1!

Live from Grapevine, Texas,

it's "The Late Drive-In"!

Briggs: Uh, w-wait.

Yuki, I -- I couldn't hear that clearly.

Say that again.

Live from Grapevine, Texas,

it's "The Late Drive-In," starring Joe Bob Briggs,

Darcy the Mail Girl,

Fabio Frizzi and the Frizzi Band, with --

Briggs: Uh, John?

Uh, John, can you take over the intro?

I don't think Yuki has quite the right energy

to be the announcer.

Brennan: Sure. You want to take it from the top?

Briggs: Let's go from the top.

Brennan: Okay.

[Cheers and applause]

You did good.

Uh, Fabio, one more time, please.

Thank you.

Live from Grapevine, Texas, it's "The Late Drive-In,"

starring Joe Bob Briggs,

Darcy the Mail Girl,

Fabio Frizzi and the Frizzi Band,

and, of course, the ghost of Lucio Fulci.

Now, fresh from his tour in rural Idaho,

your host and mine, Joe Bob Briggs!

[Cheers and applause]

Darcy: Hey!

[Cheers and applause continues]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

Brennan: Whoo!

Briggs: Yeah.

Thank you, "Drive-In" people everywhere.

We got a show for you tonight.

Fabio, give me a little of that "rip your throat out" music.

♪♪

That's always the best part of a Lucio Fulci kill --

the happy music.

The legendary Fabio Frizzi, ladies and gentlemen!

[Cheers and applause]

15 years of Lucio Fulci movies,

not to mention a hundred other soundtracks.

The maestro of Italian low-budget exploitation,

leader of "The Late Drive-In" house band.

[Cheers and applause]

Hiyo!

What are you doing, Darcy? What is that?

Every time you say something, I'm gonna go, "Hiyo!"

like Andy Richter does.

Okay. Well, it's not Andy Richter.

It's supposed to be Ed McMahon.

Ed McMahon does the "hiyo."

I'm not really familiar with Ed McMahon.

All right. Well, you're doing

a good Ed McMahon.

I could've sworn you were the spirit of Ed McMahon

come back to life when you did that "hiyo."

You could totally sell me a timeshare right now.

[Laughter]

So, before we go to our blood-soaked Lucio Fulci

double feature of "Zombie" and "The Beyond" --

Hiyo!

You love Fulci, don't you?

Fulci is the most badass of all the Italians.

Because he doesn't care about plot.

All he cares about is painting the room red, right?

Exactly.

And speaking of vegans and zombies,

did you hear about the vegan zombie, Darcy?

I don't think so.

He went to the insane asylum, and he only ate the vegetables.

[Laughs]

How do zombies eat computers?

I don't know.

They use megabytes.

Not megabytes.

[Laughs]

What -- What has a dog's head,

a cat's tail, and brains all over its face?

I don't know.

A zombie leaving the pet store.

[Laughter]

Darcy, none of these jokes are funny, okay?

Oh, man, I know.

[Laughter]

Ah, fortunately, we have a great lineup tonight,

starting with the star of "Zombie,"

the great Scottish actor Ian McCulloch.

[Cheers and applause]

Hiyo!

AEW Wrestling star, the first man

to get ghoulish in the ring, Danhausen.

Whoo! Hiyo!

Darcy, I think we can dispense with the hiyos, okay?

Thank you.

You can still laugh hysterically at every joke, though.

Dude, I'm tryin'.

The Queen of San Francisco drag,

film director, producer of some of the best

live horror shows in America,

Peaches Christ.

[Cheers and applause]

You know, that didn't sound right.

Go ahead and do the hiyos.

Peaches Christ!

Hiyo!

[Cheers and applause]

Star of "Sleepaway Camp,"

our very own mangled-dick expert,

Felissa Rose.

Hiyo!

Comedian and lifelong horror fan Bobcat Goldthwait.

Hiyo!

Actor and snake handler, David Dastmalchian.

Hiyo!

Yuki Nakamura, John Brennan,

Fabio Frizzi, Darcy the Mail Girl,

and the Joe Bob Briggs Repertory Company

doing cheap sketches.

But first...

Hiyo!

[Laughter]

I'm sorry. It's a lot of "hiyos."

you kind of missed the cue for the hiyo.

-I'm sorry. -All right.

But first, we have Lucio Fulci's first horror flick,

a movie that was controversial in its day

because it was considered a cheap Italian

rip-off of American ideas.

But then again, how many Italian horror movies

were not considered cheap rip-offs of American ideas?

But the charge turned out to be ridiculous,

and the cult status of this movie

has increased with each passing year

until today, it's considered a classic.

And, of course, it has kill scenes that have been copied

and recopied by filmmakers everywhere.

And, Fabio, I know they wrote this movie really fast.

They shot it fast.

They edited it fast to get it out quick.

How much time did you actually have

to write and record the score?

One week.

One week?! [Laughs]

And part of the appeal of the movie

was that they went back to the voodoo sources

of the original zombie movies.

They combined the old voodoo stories

with the more modern George Romero zombies.

So did -- also, did you go into

the Caribbean songbook at all

for your zombie inspiration?

All kind of percussions.

Okay. I kind of remember some Caribbean sounds in there,

like bongos and steel guitar.

So what we're about to watch here is the sensitive story

of a tabloid reporter for The New York Post

who goes down to the Caribbean

to investigate how a ghost ship arrived in New York Harbor

with a fat zombie aboard.

And he takes Mia Farrow's sister with him

because she wants to find out

what happened to her scientist father.

And since Rupert Murdoch has given him

an unlimited expense account, they end up jumping onto a yacht

with some vacationing Italian actors,

including a woman who likes to scuba dive naked,

leading to encounters with underwater,

shark-fighting zombies.

They eventually discover that a particular island

has been cut off from the world

and overrun with ugly, putrefied,

flesh-eating Conquistadors from the 16th century

that are chomping down on people in a rundown wooden hospital,

causing the local doctor, played by Shakespearean actor

Richard Johnson, to wrap their heads in gauze

and blow their brains out while fighting with his wife,

who's bitching at him about finding

a better medical assignment for the family.

Sure, we've seen it before, but have we seen it

with an apocalyptic scene on the Brooklyn Bridge?

I think not.

Let's look at those Drive-In Totals and get started.

We have 12 breasts, 15 dead bodies,

35 dead zombies, 3 bloody severed hands,

2 shark attacks with yacht ramming and blood in the water,

1 underwater zombie attack, 1 zombie-chomping shark,

1 motor vehicle wreck with pedestrian collision,

1 slow-moving zombie army, shovel to the face,

wholesale zombie brain-bashing, multiple zombie grave emergence,

exploding hospital,

Molotov cocktail zombie artillery barrage,

intestine-chewing dead-body buffet,

splinter to the eyeball, flesh-eating, face-ripping,

neck-devouring, arm consumption, wife-beating,

rotten food montage, zombie flambé,

heads roll, hands roll, arms roll, heads explode,

gratuitous Staten Island Ferry, Nosferatu fu,

microorganism fu, needle fu, seaweed fu,

Voodoo fu, surprise ending fu.

Drive-In Academy Award nominations for Captain Haggerty

as the world's fattest zombie,

Lucio Fulci in his most ambitious role to date,

as the editor of The New York Post,

Tisa Farrow as Anne Bowles,

the clueless New York girl in search of her father,

Al Cliver as Brian, the sporty yachtsman,

for saying, "The natives claim that island is cursed.

They avoid it like the plague."

Olga Karlatos as the hysterical wife who says,

"I'm the only one who knows what you're doing,

and I'm going to tell everyone

that you're the one who's crazy and demented and cruel."

Richard Johnson as the obsessed doctor

who says, "As soon as I understand the zombies,

we'll leave." [Laughter]

Auretta Gay as the naked girlfriend

who pretty much stops the movie

when she straps on her scuba gear

and chews up an entire island with the line,

"Damn you, you bastards!"

Ian McCulloch as the intrepid New York Postreporter,

our own Fabio Frizzi for the awesome soundtrack,

Dardano Sacchetti and Elisa Briganti,

the writers, and Lucio Fulci, the director,

for doing things the "Drive-In" way.

Four stars.

Joe Bob says check it out.

[Cheers and applause]

Whoa. So, Darcy...

Yes.

How do you like our new format?

Hoo! It's interesting.

Yeah. I agree. It sucks.

Okay.[Laughter]

Late-night talk shows are like a --

it's like an '80s thing, right?

Yeah. And that's totally our spirit decade.

Our spirit decade?

Did you really say that? Okay.

Fabio, do the zombies have their own theme in this movie?

Yes, absolutely.

Okay. Give us some of that zombie-synth boogie.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshot]

[Body thuds]

The boat can leave now.

Tell the crew.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Water splashing]

[Clattering, banging]

[Fog horn blares in distance]

[Wood creaking, cans rattling]

[Ship horn blaring]

Man: Chopper one to headquarters. Chopper one to headquarters.

We got a sailboat on a collision course

with just about every boat in the harbor.

Man #2: Where's it at, chopper one?

Man: Just off Staten Island.

It was almost run down by the ferry.

We can't raise anyone on board.

Man #2: Okay, chopper one.

We'll send out a patrol boat.

[Wood creaking]

[Ship horn blares]

[Ship horn blaring, siren wails]

That must be it, Bill.

Okay.

We'll take a look at her.

Man: Chopper one to headquarters.

The harbor patrol is coming alongside the sailboat now.

Ahoy there!

This is the harbor patrol.

Anyone on board?

Hey, Sarge, that boat's abandoned.

Yes, she looks abandoned. The only question is why.

Hey, if she is, Marty,

we stand to make a nice little bonus

when we bring her in.

Yeah.

Let's get over there and check.

Bring her up alongside.

Man: Chopper one to headquarters.

Chopper one to headquarters.

Man #2: This is headquarters. Come in, chopper one.

Man: The harbor patrol is about to board now.

Still no sign of life.

Skipper of that craft must be a real turkey.

[Helicopter blades whirring]

[Flies buzzing]

[Buzzing continues]

Man: Hey, watch out for the sail!

Man #2: Huh?! What?!

[Crashing]

What the hell's going on?!

Sorry. The winch is broken.

[Grunts]

I'll fix the sail.

You go below and look around.

Okay.

[Flies buzzing]

[Buzzing continues]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Thuds, squelches]

[Groaning]

♪♪

[Grunting]

[Gasps]

[Man screaming]

[Screaming continues]

♪♪

♪♪

Don't move.

Stay where you are, mister.

Put your hands on the deck there!

I told you not to move!

I mean it!

One more step and I'm gonna blast you!

Now freeze where you are!

Don't move, I said!

Don't move!

[Gunshots]

[Zombie gurgles]

♪♪

[Indistinct conversations]

Yeah. Yeah.

Where did they find this abandoned boat?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I'll put someone on it.

The boys in blue been there yet?

Now, thanks for the information.

You're a sweetheart.

You get West in here?

Peter, the chief wants you.

Right, thanks. See ya.

Uh-huh, okay.

What can I do for you, Chief?

Sit down.

Are you busy now, limey?

Uh... That depends.

I'm giving you an assignment.

Get over to -- What did she say?

Ah, pier 15. There's a story there.

Is there something big?

Mm, yeah. Boat without anyone on it.

Cop killed. Poke around a bit.

See what you can find. You know.

Okay. I'll let you know.

Uh, West...

Keep the British out of your prose, huh?

Don't take advantage of the fact your uncle bought the paper.

As if I would.

[Indistinct conversations]

Man: Harbor patrol launch is leaving now.

Man #2: All right, folks, there's nothing to see here.

Just step back.

Make way. Lady, step back, will you, please?

All right, back, back!

You there -- get back over there!

Come on. Back through the gate. There's nothing to see.

Man: Well, Miss Bowles, we're waiting.

Yes. It's my father's boat.

Where's your father now?

I don't know.

Actually, I was hoping you could tell me.

I haven't heard from him in over a month.

I see.

And, uh how long since you last spoke to him?

Uh...

Three months.

When he set sail for the Antilles to join some friends.

The Antilles?

Will someone please tell me what the hell's going on?

We already have.

Man hiding on this boat, which was adrift.

Killed a member of the Coast Guard.

Yeah, but my father.

Where is he? I mean, what's happened to him?

That's just what we'd like to know, Miss Bowles.

[Siren wails]

Sorry to get you down here at this hour.

I really can't understand why they're in such a hurry.

I really can't understand myself.

The DA's office phoned twice before you arrived, Doc.

Well, let's get it over with.

Have you -- Have you already examined him?

Yeah, I made one or two notes.

In my opinion, the death of the poor bastard

was caused by a massive hemorrhage

due to a huge laceration of the jugular.

Mm.

Do you have a hypothesis for the cause of this injury?

Take a look at these edges.

To me, it's quite obvious what caused it.

There appear to be clear indications

of one or more bites. Look carefully.

Pass me the scalpel.

I wouldn't be able to cut my way through tissue paper with that,

let alone carry out an autopsy.

Take better care of your instruments, James.

Yes, doctor.

♪♪

♪♪

[Radio chatter]

[Dance music plays]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Gasps]

Don't scream. Don't scream.

There's nothing to be afraid of.

My name's Peter West, and I'm a reporter.

Now I'm gonna take my hand away,

and you're not gonna scream, okay?

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

I'm sorry if I frightened you,

but if I hadn't done that, you'd have screamed for sure,

and our friend up there would have been on to both of us.

Who are you, and what are you doing on my father's boat?

I've already told you.

My name's West, and I'm a reporter.

I've been following you all afternoon.

How clever. Professional curiosity?

Well, the police version doesn't convince me.

And I guess it doesn't convince you, either.

Otherwise, you wouldn't be here.

What, uh -- What were you looking for?

You got a hell of a nerve, you know that?

You're not so bad yourself.

Oh, please.

Let me put it this way.

I've got some information. You've got some information.

So why don't we just throw it together

and see what we can come up with?

Because I think I've already found what you're looking for.

[Can clattering]

What do we do now?

Well, I've got an idea, but, uh...

I'm gonna need your help.

Unless, of course, you want to be explaining to some judge

what you were doing onboard your father's boat

in the middle of the night.

Now just do what I tell you, okay?

Okay.

Good. Come on.

[Moaning passionately]

Hey! What the hell's go--

Oh.

Oh.

[Clears throat]

Now, don't give me the same old story.

Well, actually, officer, uh...

Same old story, huh?

This is all your fault.

You realize that, don't you?

It was his idea, not mine.

Well, listen to her, Miss Goody Two Shoes.

It wasn't her fault. It was all my idea.

Well, whose idea was it to have a romantic setting,

down by the water?

I'd have settled for an empty boxcar.

Oh, no. Never again. Not another boxcar.

Yeah, well, she takes after her mother.

They're both bananas.

You leave my mother out of this!

She's crazy and you know it.

All right, enough of this.

Now, both of you, get outta here.

Okay, officer. Okay. Anything you say.

Come on, sweetie pie.

Good night, officer.

Yeah. Out of my sight.

Good night.

"To my daughter Anne, in case anything should happen to me.

Due to my morbid curiosity,

I have managed to contract a strange disease.

They're taking care of me as if I were some sort of

guinea pig that I know.

I'll never leave this island again,

at least not alive.

I haven't been a good father, but I have always loved you.

One last kiss from Dad, Matool."

And it's dated 15th September.

Listen, Chief, you know, I'm sure there's some connection

that ties this all together.

Well, her father, the disease he mentions,

the boat and -- and the guy that got killed, as well.

Yeah, well, it's her idea to go.

Okay, Chief, fine.

Oh, yeah. And, Chief, you'll, um --

you'll fix the tickets, okay?

Thanks. You're beautiful.

I think it's three hours.

-Yeah. -If it's on schedule,

we should arrive in Saint Thomas --

Was that us?

Woman over PA: Passengers are kindly requested to proceed...

Let's go.

No, no, no, no, no. I'll do that.

You lead the way, hmm?

[Man speaking indistinctly over PA]

[Jet engine roaring]

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

All right. Welcome back to "The Late Drive-In."

Now, tell me if I'm wrong,

but didn't they just say they're going to Saint Thomas?

If they're going to Saint Thomas in the Virgin Islands,

which is the only Saint Thomas you could fly out to

out of that TWA terminal at JFK Airport,

why is everybody speaking Spanish when they get there?

They don't speak Spanish in Saint Thomas.

Anyhow, Fabio, that song you wrote for the title sequence,

fabuloso!

[Cheers and applause]

Thank you so much.

But you know what?

A lot of the music that you're playing for us tonight

sounds different from the music in the movie.

[Speaking Italian]

Tonight is my music my way.

Okay. All right. Good.

All right. Come on over to the couch, Darcy.

Um...

How many times have you heard that in your life?

Mm, a time or two.

We have a couch, like -- and we have a chair.

Like all great talk shows.

So, Darcy, what did you do in the off season besides --

You starred in a bunch of movies.

Pfft! Well, I went to a lot of really small cities

where you do your shows.

[Laughter]Yeah, small cities, right?

Sorry about that. If they want --

If they want me in their city, I go.

But when it's in the middle of nowhere,

like here, you know, you don't really need to show up.

I will always show up to help you and promote the show.

Okay. Well, hopefully you mean our regular show

and not this talk show. But, so,

Darcy, I know you love this movie,

so let me ask you a few questions

about the first sequence, which I love.

I love the first 20 minutes. A lot of people don't.

But first of all, one of the all-time great openings, right?

Because the gunshot, the bloody bandaged head,

"The boat can leave now. Tell the crew."

Iconic scene, right?

It's like a warning sign.

You're about to see some really freaky stuff.

And then the empty yacht that sails into New York Harbor.

Obviously, that's a tribute to the scene in "Nosferatu"

where the empty Demeter sails into the harbor

carrying Dracula.

Exactly. Only, this time,

the ship is carrying the world's largest zombie.

Very well-fed zombie, right?

I mean, it was ob--

Obviously, he had a large crew

to feast on on that ship.

I'm surprised he's still hungry enough to eat the cop.

And somebody asked Fulci's cinematographer, Sergio Salvati,

how he did all those helicopter shots,

you know, those beautiful shots in New York Harbor?

And he says, "Well, it cost $25 to go up

in the tourist helicopter."

And so he just asked the pilot

if he could take a camera up in the tourist copter

and strap himself to the door and hang out of the side.

So that was just a one-man shoot in a commercial helicopter.

No safety equipment, no permit.

[Laughter]

Now, speaking of permits, let's talk about those cops.

Do New York Harbor cops really say, "Ahoy"...

[Laughter]

...when they approach a vessel?

I guess they did in 1979.

No, they never did. Not in 1979, not ever.

But one of them says to the other one,

"You know, we stand to make a nice little bonus

when we bring her in."

So, are they saying that the Coast Guard or the NYPD

or whoever these non-uniformed officers are working for,

do they get paid for apprehending anything

that can be looted?

I mean, what is the implication?

Does the NYPD have a reputation

all over the world for being corrupt?

And so what's the implication of the line?

Why do you think that line is there?

Italian writers?

[Laughter]

Okay. Exactly.

Anyway, we have the great obese zombie attack

and then the performance by Lucio Fulci that --

He's the editor of The New York Post.

Now, how do we know it's The New York Post?

Because they shot it at The New York Post,

which is why it does not look like a real newspaper office.

But anyway, while they were there,

they were wandering around, looking for places to shoot,

and apparently, they wandered into a meeting

being held by Rupert Murdoch,

and he angrily kicked them out of the building.

But The New York Post,though, that is perfect.

What better paper to cover the zombie story?

And then we have the extremely strange scene

when the medical examiner and the mute assistant

that he insults and abuses and humiliates throughout

their examination of that dead cop's body...

It's so bizarre.

Yeah. And then we have

the meet-cute scene on the yacht

when both Peter West and Anne Bowles

sneak aboard the yacht,

and they have to pretend to be making out,

you know, a necessary scene so they can wind up

the New York portion of the movie,

and the two of them can head for the tropics.

What do you think of Tisa Farrow's acting?

She's fine.

Exactly, she's fine.[Laughter]

I think she got better in "Anthropophagus," you know?

But then she disappeared from the screen forever,

and she never gives interviews about these movies.

What about Ian McCulloch as Peter West?

-Hot. -Hot.

He was hired for being hot.

He was in a hit BBC series that was really big in Italy

called "The Survivors." Kind of ahead of its time.

One of those post-apocalyptic things

where a virus accidentally released by a Chinese scientist

kills 99% of the Earth's population.

And Ian is the resourceful engineer

who has to help everybody start civilization all over again.

So, anyway, we're gonna meet Ian at the next break.

Yay!

Have you ever been to Saint Thomas?

I don't think so.

I'm pretty sure they do not speak Spanish in Saint Thomas.

If anything, besides English, they would speak Danish,

since it was originally a Danish possession.

And that bothers you?

Yeah, stuff like that bothers me in a movie.

Italian writers, they don't care.

The thing is, it's a good Italian writer.

I'm crazy about Dardano Sacchetti,

the screenwriter for this,

along with his wife, Elisa Briganti.

He didn't take a credit on this because his father had just died

and he thought it would be somehow irreligious

or something to be writing a zombie movie

after his father died. So --

So it's a -- it's a pure Elisa Briganti credit,

even though they wrote it together.

Anyway, probably the best of the Italian writers of this period.

He worked with Sergio Martino a lot,

and he worked with Fulci a lot.

He may be a great writer, but he doesn't care

what language they speak in Saint Thomas.

So what you're saying is, it's a Fulci movie.

He cares about the six-minute kill scenes.

Exactly. Yes.

All right. Back to the movie.

And, Fabio, how about some --

Do you have any "flying to the Antilles" music?

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

♪♪

Do you want to check on the boat first,

or shall we go straight to the hotel?

I don't know. Whatever you think.

Señor, do you know anyone who can rent us a boat?

Boat, señor?

Sorry. Not easy to find boat.

We want to go to Matool. It's very important.

I'm willing to pay whatever it costs.

Just now, I remember something, señor.

This morning, friend of mine, he say, two Americans,

they cruise the islands.

♪♪

♪♪

That's his boat.

Last one at edge of the jetty.

Maybe they take you.

You ask.

-Right. -Gracias.

Thanks.

Did Pedro not help you good, señor?

Oh, sure, yes.

Here you are. Thanks again.

Gracias.

♪♪

♪♪

Extra water. Store it in the galley.

Aye-aye, sir.

Ahoy there.

-Hi. -Hi, yourself.

Hi. How you doing?

I'm Peter West, and this is Anne Bowles.

Susan Barrett.

You're talking to Brian Hull.

You wouldn't be looking for a boat ride.

We would. We hear you're going on a tour of the islands.

Yeah, a little cruise.

Two months of fishing, bathing, and sunshine.

Well, we have to go to Matool.

We're trying to locate Anne's father.

She hasn't heard from him for some time.

Matool.

That's not a cool place to head.

The natives claim it's cursed. They avoided like the plague.

We have to go there, all the same.

And you want a ride from us.

If that's possible.

Any experience with boats?

Uh-huh.

And the lady?

I was born on a boat.

Okay, Peter. We'll have to load more supplies.

You pay your share. Deal?

A deal.

Step on board. Here.

Look, I'll warn you right now.

Don't expect us to come sightseeing once we get there.

I've found it never pays to ignore native superstitions.

[Radio tuning]

This is Matool calling Guadalupe 1.

Matool calling Guadalupe 1.

Come in, Guadalupe.

This is Dr. Maynard calling Guadalupe 1.

Maynard calling Guadalupe 1. Come in, Guadalupe 1.

Still no luck?

No. I...

I'm afraid it's useless to go on trying.

Then we're cut off from the rest of the world.

Well, no...

No, I wouldn't say that.

I want to leave this damn island right now.

Well, you can't right now. The radio isn't working.

How convenient for you.

I wouldn't be surprised if you broke it on purpose.

Are you tired?

Go to hell!

David, are you going out?

I have to go to the hospital.

Have they found another one?

They have, haven't they?

Tell the truth.

Now calm down.

Where did they find it this time?

You really mustn't drink so much, my darling.

I asked you a question.

They were on the other side of the island.

When will they reach this side?

Tell me!

Now, I really think you ought to rest.

We'll talk about it later.

There's really no need to agitate yourself so much.

I hate you.

No.

You don't know what you're saying.

Oh, you'd like to be able to pass me off as crazy.

Apart from -- from a handful of superstitious natives,

I'm the only one who knows what you're doing.

And don't think I'm going to keep my mouth shut!

I'm going to tell everyone that you're the one

who's crazy, demented, cruel, evil --

Aah!

I'll be at the hospital.

[Chuckles]

Hospital? You still see yourself

as the scientist you once were, don't you?

Well, you're -- you're not.

You're no better than one of their witch doctors.

Just stop it!

My research is --

Research! [Laughs]

You call fooling around with superstitions

and Voodoo rites research?

You know perfectly well that the work

I'm doing is very important.

And I wouldn't be here if it wasn't!

I don't give a damn!

I don't want to stay on this island one more hour.

You won't be happy until I meet one of your zombies.

Now, look...

as soon as I've understood the phenomenon, we'll leave.

I don't believe you.

I don't believe you.

I don't believe anything you say anymore.

Mm.

[Door closes]

♪♪

[Music intensifies]

♪♪

Miguel.

Miguel.

Sí, señor.

I have to go to the hospital,

so make sure nobody comes near the house, all right?

Sí, señor. Miguel guard.

Doctor no worry.

Nobody.

Sí, señor.

[Wind blowing]

♪♪

[Engine starts]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Tense music plays]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

We sure were lucky to find you two.

You could say that.

We're sure not having the same kind of luck

trying to find your island for you.

We should be somewhere around here, right?

More or less, yeah.

But according to the map,

there are no islands for the next 50 miles.

Not necessarily true. There's so many islands

around here that a lot have never even been charted.

Like the last couple we saw. They're not on any chart.

It's all hit-and-miss.

We could spend a month out here.

Like looking for a needle in a haystack.

You don't want to go back, do you?

No, no, no, No, we'll find Matool.

That's a promise.

Hey, now, look, don't go counting on us forever.

Don't forget, we're on vacation.

Susan: Brian!

Let's stop for a while. I want to take some shots.

How about it? Come on.

It looks fantastic down below.

Brian: Okay.

[Spits]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Camera shutter clicks]

♪♪

[Camera shutter clicks]

♪♪

[Camera shutter clicks]

♪♪

Look! Over there. See?

Brian: Yeah.

That's another island.

Peter: Maybe we're in luck at last.

Who's to say that that isn't Matool?

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Hey! Help!

There's a shark! Help!

Oh, it's gonna attack her!

Susan: Hey! I'm going back down!

♪♪

[Gun cocks]

♪♪

[Gunshots]

[Crashing, all grunt]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Scraping]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Bones crunching]

♪♪

[Shuddered breathing]

There --

There was a man down there.

What?

There was a man.

A man?

Tonight's broadcast is brought to you by Sky Bar.

Keep your eye on the sky!

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

Wow.

There is nothing like an underwater shark versus zombie

wrestling match witnessed by a topless hottie.

Right? Strange as it may seem,

that was not the first underwater zombie.

Apparently, even underwater zombies

are borrowed from other movies. There's --

There's a movie called "Zombies of Mora Tau,"

from the '50s, where the zombies live on the ocean floor

and they attack the divers.

But the most likely place that the creators of "Zombie"

saw this was in a movie called "Shock Waves,"

which came out two years earlier.

And it had Nazi zombies.

[Laughter]

Zombies in full S.S. gear who can walk on the ocean floor,

and they come up wherever they want to cause mayhem.

Have you ever seen "Zombie Lake"?

-"Zombie Lake"? -Mm-hmm.

Is that another underwater zombie movie?

Not just underwater zombies,

but Nazi underwater zombies.

So there's two -- So Nazi underwater zombies

is a subgenre.[Laughter]

There's a whole thing.

It's so good.

The Nazis come out of the water and attack this

fully naked girls volleyball team.

They have naked-girls volleyball in the movie?

Oh, yeah. The volleyball team is skinny dipping,

and the Nazi zombies come and attack them.

You're making that up.

I am so not. It's so good.

[Laughter]

All right. Anyway, my question was,

how did the actor who was in the full zombie makeup --

We're going back to "Zombie" now.

We're not talking about "Zombie Lake."

We're going back to "Zombie."

How did that actor get oxygen in that scene?

I mean, all you see is the zombie.

And the answer, apparently, is he was

just able to hold his breath for a long time.

It's a Mexican stuntman named Ramón Bravo.

And he's not just a stuntman.

He is a shark trainer and an underwater photographer.

And he's actually the guy who discovered

the famous sleeping tiger sharks of Isla Mujeres,

which is where they filmed this scene.

So he used a shark that he was familiar with

that lives in that area.

And he fed the shark a massive amount of food

right before they did the scene.

And then he -- and he also gave the shark a sedative

before they staged the fight, because there is a point

where the shark bites off part of the zombie.

So he had to get really, really close to the shark.

And as you can see, they're touching a lot.

They are wrestling.

So Guillermo del Toro is a big fan of this movie,

and he's very proud of the fact that the zombie-shark sequence

was choreographed by a Mexican.

Now, the other Mexican involved in this story is George Romero.

That's what the Italians called George Romero -- "The Mexican."

They called him The Mexican.

They said, "Our zombies have to be better

than The Mexican's zombies."

Although I don't think George Romero was Mexican.

I don't think he had any Mexican ancestry.

I think his father was Castilian, by way of Cuba.

But anyway, they thought of him as The Mexican,

and the reason that mattered is

that this movie was released in Italy as "Zombie 2."

"Zombie 1" is "Dawn of the Dead,"

and that was released a year earlier,

but it was called "Zombie 1."

That was the Italian title for "Dawn of the Dead."

So they were trying to capitalize

on the enormous international success of

"Dawn of the --" "Dawn of the Dead"

by implying this was a sequel,

leading to many critics saying that it was a rip-off,

even though it has absolutely nothing to do

with the plot of "Dawn of the Dead,"

other than both movies have zombies.

The reason these zombies are so extreme, though,

is that the entire Lucio Fulci team was determined

to "make our zombies better than The Mexican's zombies."

And the producer, Fabrizio De Angelis,

he thought it was also a hedge

against financial failure, 'cause he said,

"If we make the zombies so far over the top, you know,

more than any zombies ever made before,

and it doesn't work,

maybe people will laugh at the zombies

and we can sell it as a comedy."

That's typically producer thinking, right?

So, fortunately for the future of Lucio Fulci's horror career,

nobody laughed at the zombies.

But, all right, why am I still talking?

We have with us tonight the top investigative

zombie-outbreak reporter for The New York Post,

the intrepid Peter West here with us

in the form of Ian McCulloch.

Please welcome Ian McCulloch to "The Last Drive-In."

-Thank you very much. -Whoo!

-Ian! -Good evening.

Happy to have you here.

Very glad to be here. Thank you.

Ian, weren't you doing all kinds of classy

Shakespearean theater before you got this job?

Yeah. I sat my last six hours at Oxford University.

I sat my last exam on a Wednesday morning,

and then Wednesday afternoon,

I was rehearsing with Vanessa Redgrave at Stratford,

being paid money.

Stratford-upon-Avon with the Royal Shakespeare Company.

And I had a three-year contract straightaway,

so I didn't have to get a degree, so...

-Really? -Luckily, I got one.

How do you -- How do you end up

making a Lucio Fulci movie

from the Royal Shakespeare Company?

I did a TV series,

which you sort of mentioned in your introduction,

called "Survivors" -- "Sopravvissuti" in Italian.

It was a big, big hit in Italy. Somebody dubbed my voice.

[Deep voice] I had a very deep voice like that...

[Normal voice]...which worked better than mine.

And I was doing a play in Plymouth in the west of England.

My agent rang, which, as you know,

was unusual, and she said,

"There's an Italian film company.

They're making a film,

and they want you to play one of the leading parts,

and you'll have seven weeks on it.

You'll have locations in New York,

the Dominican Republic, and Rome.

You'll get $1,000 a week living allowance.

You can fly your girlfriend, partner,

to any location that we use first-class.

All we want you to do is to say yes."

-Wow! -"We don't want to see you.

Just say yes." -They really wanted you.

The $1,000 a week is in addition to your salary?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I had lots of money,

so I bought lots of clothes which, alas, no longer fit me.

[Laughter]

But I said yes very, very quickly.

And it was only after --

They didn't mention zombies.

-No? -This film, I think,

was originally called "Nightmare Island"?

Yes, "Nightmare Island."

Dardano Sacchetti wrote it before they came up

with the idea of making it "Zombie," too.

Yeah, well, I think it's got about 60 different titles.

You've alluded to some of them. So if you look up my C.V.,

I've done more films than more people in the world,

but they're all the same film.

Okay.

But I did it.

Now, Lucio Fulci

was not known for being a warm, nurturing sort of guy.

Right?

Lucio didn't bring you herbal tea

when you had a headache

and ask you how your day was going.

No, he did not. [Laughs]

What was your relation with Lucio?

Well, Lucio treated all the sort of --

Richard Johnson and myself with a sort of respect.

I mean, he relied on us knowing our lines,

being in the right place and saying --

You said nice things.

I think the scripts are probably better in Italian

than they are in English

because, to me, you have to say some pretty awful lines.

But he just -- he just relied on us to come out

with a good way of sort of saying them to convince people.

But other than that,

he had nothing whatsoever to do with us.

He never gave us any direction. There was never any criticism.

You just sort of turned up, did it, and...

Did he ever scream at you? He was known as a screamer.

No, he -- Richard Johnson --

I wasn't there. Richard Johnson tells the story

that the beautiful Auretta Gay,

who wasn't an actress, as you know.

She was a sort of model.

He sort of bullied her 'cause he decided --

instead of using the sort of carrot,

he was using a stick.

So he bullied her pretty unfairly.

And Richard said that, at one time,

he saw Fulci after a scene with Auretta

throw himself on the ground

and start picking -- picking up,

gouging up some earth, stuffing it in his mouth,

and eating it.

And Richard said, "Why are you doing that?"

and he said,

"Because if I don't eat this, I'm going to eat her."

So he could do that when he wanted to.

Oh, my God.

He was especially hard on women, in general, right?

Ian: He obviously loves his daughters.

I don't think he had the happiest of relationships

with the opposite sex, I'm afraid.

All right.

Who suffered in various films as a result.

All right. Now, the part was written

as an American intrepid reporter.

But you -- you had concerns about your accent.

Yes. It was crap.

[Laughter]

You didn't think you could do an American accent?

I cannot -- I mean, I find it pretty difficult

just to do a Scottish accent.[Laughter]

-Okay? -I mean, obviously, in

"Where Eagles Dare," playing a German officer,

my children are convinced

that I'm doing it with a Scottish accent,

although it's my very best German accent.

No, accents aren't my forte, I'm afraid, so...

But you are a Scot from Glasgow.

I am from Clydebank in Glasgow, yeah.

The only thing I know about the Glaswegian accent

is from "Trainspotting,"

which was the only English-language film

that required English subtitles when released in America.

Just so thick. I mean, they're incomprehensible.

Oh, okay.

As you say, they need subtitles.

Right. At the time this movie was made, though,

you were a heartthrob across Europe, right?

Because you had that, um...

you had -- you would get mobbed

in the streets by the girls, right?

I -- Well, I've never been mobbed in England in my life.

Not in England, but everywhere else.

Sadly.

As nicely -- nice the way you put it,

but, in fact, I seemed to attract the attention

of 12-and-under...

Oh.

...or 60 and over.

However, I was --

I was never mobbed in England,

but I was in the Vatican, going through that.

And there was a group of about 60 girls

that were about 12-ish.

And they suddenly saw me and started moving towards me.

And I panicked, and I ran out as fast as I could.

Really?

And the same thing happened in a place called Latina,

on location.

I was on the beach, thinking, "I'll enjoy myself."

And suddenly, there were these

young, young girls who saw me

and started advancing towards me.

And I'm afraid, like a coward, I ran away as fast as I could.

[Laughter]

But it's never happened in England.

Really, mobbed in the Vatican is one I've never heard before.

Uh, well, I don't think anyone's ever moved as fast

as that in the Vatican, either.[Laughter]

So you're used to working with polished BBC scripts,

and then you're handed "Zombie,"

which I assume was a rough English translation

of Dardano Sacchetti's Italian script.

It was a 1940s Hollywood movie,

second-rate, B-movie script.

[Laughter]

Which is why the cops say, "Ahoy."

Yeah. Well, perhaps they do.

But the other thing -- you asked the question,

I think you get money if you take in a boat

that's -- that's drifting.

That's the reward they were gonna get.

Even if you're a cop? Even if you're a --

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was involved in a mid-Channel --

cross-Channel crash on a yacht,

and we actually lost one of our crew.

We were hit by a big German tanker,

and we were drifting for about 14 hours,

rescued by the lifeboat.

And they were all old men,

going out in ferocious, ferocious storms.

And their only criticism was that it was the Cup final day.

And they thought -- they were angry

with sailing people going out

when they wanted to watch their football.

Oh, okay. So...

But what they do, they get -- whatever the correct word is.

If they tow something in,

it's not called bounty or booty or whatever,

but they get a percentage of the value of the yacht.

So I think you're policeman might get a payment here.

So even the cops could.

Well, now, did you and Richard Johnson,

as the two distinguished Brit actors,

he's also a Royal Shakespeare Company alumnus.

Did you -- Did you trade notes?

Were you -- Were you close?

No, no, no, no. I was in awe of him.

When I -- when I joined the Royal Shakespeare Company,

he was the really, really big star.

He's got fantastic looks,

a wonderful voice, and a great, great actor.

So on stage, I wanted to be exactly like him.

But Richard also had another side,

which I also tried very, very hard,

unsuccessfully, mainly to emulate,

and that was that he was involved

in probably a scandal every weekend.

So you picked up the Sunday papers

and there was a picture of Richard

with another beautiful girl -- model, actress or whatever --

and he'd done something wrong.

I mean, he was very, very much a sort of ladykiller.

And that seemed to be the ideal existence of a classical actor

was to do sort of Shakespeare during the day or the week

and have a really good time at the weekend.

So he was he was -- he was the party animal of London.

He was -- I idolized him.

I was really chuffed to be in this film with him.

And he in this film, he could just extemporize, as well.

I mean, it sounded --

Some of it will just sound like Shakespeare.

It sounds great.

Dr. Menard is sort of

the most complex character in the movie.

Yeah, yeah.

Now, Tisa Farrow.

Yes.

She made some interesting acting choices.

Um...

I would call her performance wide-eyed.

-Yes. -Do you agree?

-Um... Uh, I don't know whether

that's the right expression.

To me, she just sort of did the job

and got off set as quickly as she could.

Didn't want to be there.

But she may not have been the only one sort of doing that.

We didn't really get on. We didn't disagree,

but I just thought she was very American,

and I was British.

She probably thought I was sort of cold and reserved,

and I thought she was a bit too sort of bright, breezy.

As characters, are the two of you falling in love

in the course of the movie? I wasn't quite sure.

Well, I asked someone the other day, I just said,

"I did these three films,

and I've got a sort-of girlfriend in each.

And I didn't remember kissing one of them."

[Laughter]

-And somebody said -- -I think you kissed --

Well, that's -- You pointed it out.

I kiss her in that little sort of boat,

but I have no recollection of it whatsoever.

So you don't know if you were falling in love?

Well, none of them.

I mean, "Contamination,"

I certainly didn't have a relationship with the girl.

And I would like to have had a relationship

with the girl in "Zombie Holocaust"

'cause she was a beautiful model.

And I would -- And I would love

to have had a relationship with Auretta Gay,

whose life I saved on set. But she didn't --

You saved Auretta Gay's life?

Yeah. Well, when they did that scene

that you talk about, the shark scene,

there was a scene where on --

She's supposed to come up to the surface,

having seen all the nasty stuff and crying out,

"Help, help, help, help, help!"

And we were doing the scene.

I was on the boat that he smashed into.

And I saw her, and I thought

she was getting in terrible difficulties

and that the "Help, help, help"

had changed to "Aiuto, aiuto, aiuto,"

which was close to Italian for "Help, help, help."

So I dived in very, very bravely.

And I picked her up in my arms, and I held her.

Al Cliver dived in about five minutes after me,

and we dragged her to the boat, and off she got.

And she never thanked me.

-Really? -No.

'Cause she said she was acting.

Oh, she said she wasn't in any danger.

-Well, that's what she said. -But she obviously was.

But she was supposed to say, "Help, help, help,"

and I think she was saying it in Italian.

So I think -- That's my story, anyway.

Okay. Okay. Ian, stay with us.

We're gonna go back to the movie right now.

But you guys don't even arrive at the island of Matool

until after the intermission.

It's a very late-developing story,

for your part of the movie.

Yes, I've seen the film once.

[Laughter]

I have to say, listening to you now,

you sound more like a, um...

you sound more like

upper-class British than Glaswegian.

Can you do a Glaswegian accent if you're asked to?

-N-N-No, is the answer.

[Laughter]

No, I've just been sort of educated out of it.

Okay. Fabio, can you play us out?

Can you play something Glaswegian?

Mm...no.

No.

[Laughter]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

[Wind howling]

[Flies buzzing]

[Groaning]

He's over here, Doctor.

[Flies buzzing]

Don't think he'll last till the morning.

What shall I do?

[Groaning]

[Flies buzzing]

Take him into the sacristy.

I don't want the others to see him.

There's no need to alarm them.

Tie him down securely.

Doctor! Doctor!

Doctor, everybody, everybody leaving now.

Quiet, please.

Nurse, look after that patient.

Doctor, the natives are leaving the village.

Everybody go. What do we do?

Talk about it outside.

♪♪

Well, what happened?I don't know.

In village, big trouble and commotion.

It's the juju man, the new one.

He's speaking plenty.

He seemed to be possessed by all the devils in hell.

How ridiculous.

Doctor, the natives are going crazy.

They run all over village.

They pick up their possessions and disappear.

Where did they go?

They going inland.

They're making voodoo, I think.

Voodoo? Voodoo won't solve anything.

Doctor, they afraid.

They very much afraid, these people.

You too.

You're afraid, aren't you, Lucas?

[Wind howling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Heavy breathing]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Dog growling]

♪♪

[Dog yelps]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Shower stops]

[Rustling]

[Rustling]

[Sighs]

[Hissing]

[Creaking]

[Gasps]

[Gasps]

[Groans]

[Bones crunching]

[Thudding, crunching]

[Gasps]

[Thud]

[Gasps]

[Thudding]

[Gasps]

[Zombie growls]

[Screams]

[Gasps]

[Screams]

[Groans]

[Screams]

[Screams]

[Screaming]

[Screams]

[Heavy breathing]

[Wind howling]

This is all right, Brian.

Give her two or three feet of slack

and then tie her off.

[Motor rumbling]

Doctor? Dr. Menard.

What?

What's wrong?

Matthias.

Matthias?

Matthias what?

He's...he's...

What don't you say it? Are you afraid to say it? Huh?

It's not that. I don't believe in voodoo.

Oh, I don't believe in voodoo either.

But the natives around here do so...

So we investigate the phenomena, right?

I've seen them. You've seen them.

Now, Matthias, he's one of them, see?

Yeah.

Well, you have to help him.

We have to try to help him.

So we go to the hospital. Come on.

The drive shaft's cracked.

It must have been the shark when he hit us.

Is it serious?

Well, we have two possibilities.

Either we go ashore and walk around until we come to

the local repair shop, or...

Or?

Or we remain here, fire off a few flares...

and hope that somebody will come and help us.

We'll have a tough time making it to the next island

if we don't get that shaft fixed.

♪♪

♪♪

Poor Matthias.

♪♪

[Gunshot]

[Flare whistling]

[Insects buzzing]

[Drumming in distance]

[Natives chanting in distance]

Let's go.

[Gunshot]

[Whistling]

[Drumming, chanting continues]

Doctor. Doctor.

What is it, Lucas?Rockets.

There's somebody firing rockets.

Rockets?I seen them, man.

Do you know where they come from?

Yes. They're coming from Catfish Bay.

I'd better go and investigate.

Take care of him for me, Nurse.

Who is it? The devil?

We'll know soon enough. Come on.

Let's get this over with.

[Drumming, chanting continues]

[Drumming, chanting grows louder]

Bury them now, missy?

No, not yet.

There are two more who are going to die soon.

Woman: Help me.

[Sobbing]

[Muttering]

[Man groans]

[Muttering]

[Speaking Spanish]

[Gasps]

Manuel!

[Speaking Spanish]

I buried you. But I see you walking.

[Sobs]

[Static crackles]

[Cheers and applause]

Okay. That ramshackle wooden church

converted into a hospital,

I know they built that for the movie.

Italians can build anything and build it really fast.

Joe D'Amato used to order sets in the morning,

and he'd be shooting on them in the afternoon.

But anyway, they built that set,

and then it looked a little too perfect.

And so they threw a bunch of dirt and mud all over it,

and it still looked too good.

It was just too new.

And so they ordered a bulldozer and they told the guy,

"Push on the frame."

[Laughter]

And they stopped him just before it was about to topple over.

And they said, "There, that looks like flimsy, third world,

makeshift, mission church zombie hospital."

And they always had great crew in these movies.

Ian, you would know.

Was that church hospital, was that in Italy,

or was that in the Dominican Republic?

No, that was in Italy.

It's the same place that they filmed "Cleopatra."

Oh, really?

It was an area of the Pontine marshes

that Mussolini had got drained during the Depression.

Okay.So they filmed big scenes

with Taylor and Burton there in a place called Latina.

But they just sort of overused it.

I mean, it looks more like the Caribbean

than the Caribbean anyway.

That's right.

So the eye scene that we just --

we have to talk about the eye scene.

One of the most famous suspense sequences,

actually, in horror.

But it ends in that moment where you go,

"Is he going to go there? Because he won't go there.

They're gonna to cut away. Oh, no, he's going there."

And damn, he went there.

As that giant splinter goes through the eye

of Olga Karlatos.

And in Italy,

they always have an intermission.

In every film, no matter how long or short the film is,

they always have an intermission.

So they put the eye penetration scene right before

the intermission to give people something to talk about

while they were buying the popcorn.

So that's the work of Giannetto De Rossi,

the fabled Italian special effects master.

So, Ian, you're acting in all of these scenes

where it's always a foursome scene.

You and Tisa Farrow are a couple.

Al Cliver and Auretta Gay are a couple.

And I guess they're speaking Italian

and you're speaking English?

I think Olga Karlatos is the only one who spoke Greek.

Olga Karlatos spoke Greek?

Auretta spoke Italian. Yeah.

And everybody spoke Italian except you?

Al's pretty good with sort of English.

So you had English, Italian, and Greek.

All involved in the same scene, but not at the same time

because we obviously weren't there when Olga

was doing her sort of stuff.

Okay, and so were you sometimes saying English lines

and someone was responding in Italian lines?

Not for me. No, I escaped all that

Oh, okay.I felt lost enough already.

So if they'd done that, I'd have been totally lost.

Okay. Because they dub everything in Italy.

It doesn't matter whether -- they even dub Italian,

they dub Italian actors for Italian actors.

So they're the country of dubbing.

So Al Cleaver actually told a heartbreaking story

about he went to a fan convention in Cleveland,

and they were honoring "Zombie."

I think it was the 30th anniversary. Were you --

I think I was there.Were you there, too?

Al said that the affection for the film

made him stop being ashamed of being an actor

because I guess his family had denigrated

the films that he was in when he was a young man,

and he felt like he could stand up to his wife

and say what he did was worthwhile.

So I'm not getting the words exactly right,

but it was something to that effect.

But I want to ask you, Ian, when these films came out,

they were despised by the cultural establishment

and the high Brahmins of art,

and you made at least three of them

that ended up on the "Video Nasty" list.

And yet you were on both sides of the cultural divide

because you liked Fulci

and you also liked the Shakespeareans.

So how was that for you back in London or Glasgow?

Well, I have to say, the money and the locations

were the great attraction about doing this movie

in the first place.

But when we'd sort of done it,

and you talked about the Video Nasties,

we met my wife's uncle in London,

and he looked really unhappy.

And he was a member of the House of Lords.

And he looked really unhappy.

And I said, "What's the matter, Uncle Martin?

You're not looking too good."

And he said, "Well, I've got something

really horrible to do today."

And I said, "Well, what is it?"

He said, "Well, the Metropolitan Police

have put together a selection of about 50 films

which we think they ought to ban for being blasphemous

or vicious or too bloody,

and we're not looking forward to it."

And I said, "Well, that's great because you'll see me

because I'm in three of them."

[Laughter]

And he gave me, I don't know what the look was,

whether it was disdain, hate, horror, whatever.

He just looked at me and said, "Ian, how could you?"

[Laughter]So I had to balance that.

That's the other side of it.

But it is just sort of magical

because I say, I went to see it in Edinburgh,

and I didn't want to watch the film again.

So I was backstage, and I just sort of listened,

waiting for gasps of horror.

And it was a full sort of cinema.

And what I heard sort of relates to the comedy side of the film,

was instead of the gasps and horrors, I heard applause,

laughter, cheering.

And they joined in with the script.

I mean, not just, you know, "The boat can leave now,

tell the crew."Right.

They joined in, whatever they knew, they sort of joined.

And I had no idea that anything like that could happen.

And it was a revelation,

the sort of fondness that people have.

And I meet people who've got about eight copies of it,

and every time a new one comes out,

whether it's at a laser or a 4K or whatever,

they just add to their collection.

I mean, it's had an amazing life.

I think certainly with the horror crowd,

it is one of the most popular

horror films made ever.

Yeah. Ever.

Were you an "I want to do my own stunts" kind of guy?

I was when I started out.

But then I realized that, from an insurance point of view,

you actually sort of can't do it.

And at the end of the day, if you get hurt, as well,

then it's not worth it.

Did you do all the stunts in this movie?

The stunts are just sort of killing people,

really, isn't it?

The stunt I was most pleased of was when I was in New York,

I bought a Bjorn Borg tennis racket, a walkie talkie,

and the camera that took some pictures of one of the scenes.

And when they were doing the water scene,

they were shouting from the shore 100 yards out to sea

with the instructions, and no one could hear anything.

And I said, Well, I've got a walkie talkie in my hotel room.

And they said, "Well, can you go and get it?"

So I got it, wrapped it up in a plastic bag.

And this is my one stunt.

I swam 100 yards out to sea

and then gave them the walkie talkie,

and they could continue the scene.

But that's the most effort I made in the entire film.

Okay, well, you do shoot a lot of zombies.

Yeah, but that's just bang, bang.

[Laughter]

All right, well, stick around.

We got lots more zombie killing to come.

But in the meantime, I wanted to bring out

the world's biggest "Zombie" fan,

a woman that I have known for a while now.

The Queen of San Francisco drag, a film director

in her own right,

if you've seen her movie "All About Evil."

And she actually recreates films like "Zombie"

on stage at the famous Castro Theatre.

So please welcome Peaches Christ!

[Cheers and applause]

-Yeah! -Uh...

-What? Joshua? -Hi.

What?

Well, we have a problem.

Joshua Grannel, everybody.

[Applause]

This is the director of "All About Evil"

and the manager of Peaches.

You're the manager of Peaches Christ, right?

Where is Peaches, Joshua?

Well, Peaches had a personal crisis.

She didn't leave. She's still here in her trailer.

Is she sick? What's wrong?

Well, she was upset about the size of her wardrobe closet.

Some of her costumes got crushed.

Are you telling me that Peaches

is pissed off in her trailer?

Yeah, and the eyeliner that she specifically requested

when she left San Francisco, well, it wasn't provided.

We sent somebody to CVS to get some eyeliner. I know --

Exactly. She does not use drugstore eyeliner.

Okay?Joshua, you promised

Peaches Christ.

We are waiting on Peaches Christ.

Okay, I think maybe if you baby talk her

a little bit, she'll stop crying.

Joshua, you've known Peaches for how long?

Well, she was in my senior thesis film back at Penn State.

Yeah, "Jizz Mopper: A Love Story."

I remember that.

So you've known Peaches for, what, 25 years?

Oh, at least. I mean, you know,

we've been producing "Midnight Mass" together

since 1998.

And that's the movie event you stage

at the Castro Theatre, classic camp movies.

And then you directed her in --

You directed "All About Evil", right?

Yes.What year was that?

2010.2010.

Well, did she refuse to come out of her trailer

when you were directing "All About Evil"?

Oh, God. Many times.

Then you know how to work with her.

So get her out here.

We'll use her in the second movie.

She's a pro, right?

She's a bitch.

But, yes, yes, she's a pro. She's a pro bitch.

Okay. All right. Well, get her out here.

Just get her out here. I'll talk to her between segments.

Okay, thanks. That would help a lot.

Really, seriously. Because, well, she loves you.

That trailer was not cheap, Joshua.

Well, she says the wardrobe closet is small.

It's a trailer! Okay?

Okay. Message received.

All right, go. Go get her now.

All right, let's get back to the movie.

And, Darcy, can you go to Peaches' trailer

and share some eyeliner with her?

On it, boss.Because you probably

have eyeliner that costs 900 bucks, right?

You're not far off.

All right. Good. Done.

All right, Fabio, play us some

"wood through the eyeball" music to get us back on track.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Applause]

[Static crackles]

[Drumming]

Menard: I met your father about three years ago

when he first came out to these islands.

Whenever he could, he would come and stay for

a few weeks here with me on Matool.

When he...

became a victim of the disease,

he insisted upon staying,

in spite of everything I said to him.

I insisted that he should leave, but he wouldn't.

He felt that he could, in some way, become a guinea pig.

That he could help in discovering

what was causing the horrors that were destroying our island,

transforming it into a wasteland of terror.

Extremely courageous man.

I remember the day when my assistant came to tell me

that your father was dying.

[Footsteps approaching]

Doctor, your friend. Quickly.

[Labored breathing]

[Footsteps approaching]

[Insects buzzing]

David, closer.

Finished.

I feel I'm about to die.

I've had a good life.

But I never thought it would end this way.

But I've got two things to ask. Listen carefully.

They're very important, my friend.

I've written to my dear child.

And the letter, see that it gets to her.

And make sure that -- [Wheezes]

My soul rests in everlasting peace.

[Wheezing]

Menard: I spent the day watching over his body.

But I knew that eventually I would have to find the courage

to release him.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Gasps]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshot]

[Sighs]

[Body thuds]

The boat can leave now.

Tell the crew.

[Squawking]

[Drumming]

What exactly did my father die of, Dr. Menard?

And the boat's crew? What happened to them?

Yes, Doctor.

What is all this about the dead coming back to life again

and having to be killed a second time?

I mean, what the hell's going on here?

You ever heard of voodoo?

Voodoo? Doctor, you got to be joking.

That's kid's stuff.

I mean, voodoo is just plain superstitious horse shit.

Basically, it's a mixture of two religions.

One, Catholicism, brought here by

the Spanish conquistadores,

and two, African tribal rites

that were brought here by the slave trade.

Well, whatever it is, it makes the dead stand up and walk.

I've seen it with my own eyes.

That's impossible.

I know it's impossible!

It's happening. I've seen it.

The natives say it's something to do with voodoo.

Some evil witch doctor who creates these zombies.

But I'm sure there's a natural explanation.

And I'm determined to find it.

[Drumming continues]

Doctor.

Doctor, something's happened to Mr. Fritz.

Oh, what happened to him?

No one told me.

Missy, she take a look.

Go inside.

Bad news?

Oh. Fritz, a friend of mine,

who happens to be the only other white man on the island,

he's -- he's had an accident.

Oh, we've got him at the hospital.

I'm sure he'll be all right.

Well, is there anything that we can do?

No, no. Thank you.

Uh, well -- well, yes.

My wife's alone at the -- at the cottage.

We've only got our manservant to look after her.

And I'd be very grateful if you'd call on her.

It's only seven or eight miles up the trail.

You can't miss it.

Well, I'll see you later.

[Wind Howling]

[Engine starts]

[Groaning]

[Insects buzzing]

[Groaning continues]

Doctor, I thought it was more advisable

to bring him here.

[Groaning]

You did right.

What happened to your arm, Fritz?

One of the living dead.

[Chuckles] Too late.

I saw it too late.

Where? Where did you see this?

[Groans] In the village.

[Groans] I saw it.

Oh. Oh, my God.

In this village?

Ja.

Tell Lucas to lock all the doors.

It's no use.

It's a waste of time to lock the doors.

They'll be here soon

to destroy us all.

[Wind howling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Susan: We must have driven eight miles by now.

Yes, more than that.

Why don't we just take a chance

and sail for the nearest place

where we know there's a shipyard.

After we've seen the doctor's wife.

Look, Peter. Is that it?

♪♪

♪♪

[Whistles]

Nice layout.

Ah, the doctor's doing all right by the look of it.

Yeah, but there's something fishy about him.

♪♪

[Knocking]

[Knocking]

Mrs. Menard!

Mrs. Menard?

It doesn't seem like anybody's at home.

What do we do now?

Might as well go inside.

Is there anybody here?

[Screams]

Oh.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Whimpering]

[Zombie growls]

Aah!

♪♪

♪♪

[Gasps]

♪♪

[Grunts]

Come on! Come on!Get out of here!

Come on!

Peter: Brian, you drive!

Quick, Brian! Hurry!

Get us out of here, please! Get us out!

[Engine revs]

My God! Did my father become one of those?

No, he didn't, Anne. You heard the doctor.

Let's just find that hospital and get the hell out of here

as quickly as we can.

[Wind howling]

[Sighs]

[Gunshot]

[Sighs]

Hey, look out!

[Tires squeal]

[Gasps]

[Groaning]

Damn it.

[Clanking]

[Steam hissing]

The radiator's had it.

Yeah, well, I think my ankle has gone the same way.

Great. We're gonna have to walk now.

You think you can make it?

We don't have much choice, do we?

Well, come on. Let's get to that hospital before dark.

[Drumming in distance]

[Natives chanting in distance]

Drums.

Getting closer.

I hate it!

Damn you, you bastards!

[Panting] I can't take it!

[Sobbing]

-Come on. -They're laying

a little voodoo on us.

It's got a sound all of its own.

Yes. Well, anyway, let's hurry up.

It's gonna be dark soon.

[Drumming, chanting continues]

[Drumming continues in distance]

[Wind howling]

Lucas?

You know what is the cause of all this?

Is it voodoo?

Lucas not know nothing, man.

The father of my father always say

when the earth spit out the dead,

they will come back to suck the blood from the living.

That's nonsense.

That's just a stupid superstition.

Yes, you are right, Doctor.

You know many more things than Lucas.

I don't believe that voodoo can bring

the dead back to life.

And Lucas not believe

that the dead be dead.

[Drumming continues in distance]

No, it's no good. I-I can't go any further.

I've got to rest up for a bit.

Okay, Peter. We'll take a quick five here.

We've got to be close to that damn hospital now.

Look, why don't you two rest here,

and we'll take a look up ahead, right?

[Grunts]

[Birds chirping]

Hey, how about this?

What is it? It's a helmet.

It must be all of 400 years old.

[Drumming intensifies]

[Chanting continues]

This must have been a cemetery

for the Spanish conquistadores.

[Sighs] Thanks.

I'm sorry I dragged you into all this.

It's my father we came looking for, isn't it?

You know, when we get back to New York --

Unh-unh. You don't have to say anything now.

It's just...

I'm so scared we're not gonna make it off this island.

[Low growl]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Screams]

[Grunting]

[Bones cracking]

[Screaming continues]

[Growling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Screaming]

[Gurgling]

♪♪

♪♪

[Grunts]

Susan.

Susan.

Susan.

[Grunts]

Come on. Let's go, before it's too late.

We can't leave her here all alone.

She's dead.

Brian, don't you understand? She's dead.

Look, there's nothing that you can do here.

Come on, man. Let's go.

♪♪

♪♪

[Low growling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Wind howling]

♪♪

♪♪

[Groans]Brian!

It's no good. I can't --

You can't stay here.

Leave me here.Come on. Get up.

Oh, no! They're coming.

Save yourselves. just leave me.

Get up!Man, you can make it.

Ohh.

Come on. I've got you.

That the church?

The doctor's hospital!

We've done it!

Come on, man. Come on, Peter.

We've done it.

[Insects buzzing]

He's fading rapidly.

Shall I continue with the transfusion?

No, it's useless.

He's gonna die anyway.

[Pounding]Brian: Dr. Menard!

Anne: They're right behind us! Open the door!

[Pounding continues]

Brian: Come on, Doctor! Open the damn door!

Anne: Doctor, open up!

Brian: Dr. Menard! For Christ's sake!

[Pounding]

What took you so long?Oh, thank God!

Out there, they're coming back to life.

They're everywhere!

[Static crackles]

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

♪♪

[Applause]

Fabio, is that the main "Zombie" theme?

This is my"Zombie" theme.

[Applause]

All right, well, you know, for my money,

everybody talks about that eye scene as being the most

horrible scene in the movie.

But the more disturbing scene to me is when they

rip out Susan's throat.

That image goes on forever. It has arterial spray.

It's just gross.

The eye thing, they always say,

"Not since Luis Bunuel sliced the eye in 'Un Chien Andalou'."

Has anybody seen "Un Chien Andalou"?

It's some kind of Salvador Dali surrealist BS from the '20s.

Anyway, one thing I'm sure of, though,

is Lucio Fulci had seen "Un Chien Andalou" because

there is virtually nothing in a Lucio Fulci movie that hasn't

already been in some other movie.

So here's my theory about Fulci,

and it's unlike the prevailing theory about Fulci.

He's not an auteur. He's a great manager.

He finds the absolute best guy for each specialty.

Like Sergio Salvati is his cinematographer.

He uses Dardano Sacchetti, and he also uses

Ernesto Gastaldi, the other great screenwriter of the era.

His make up effects guy is Giannetto De Rossi.

His editor was always Vincenzo Tomassi.

Even his set builders were guys who worked for him movie

after movie after movie.

And so he had this team,

and he was the evil overlord of the team.

He was not the best writer, but he hired the best writers.

He was not any good at makeup, but he hired the best guy.

And then he would make them do things

that they had never done before.

He would charge them up, like at the end of this movie,

which I won't give away in advance.

Also, people forget this, but during the time

we're talking about, horror was a producer's game.

Fabrizio De Angelis is the guy who raised the money for this,

and the way he raised the money was to say,

"We're going to call it 'Zombi 2' to take advantage

of George Romero's 'Zombi 1.'"

Romero had a deal with Dario Argento.

Argento would release the Italian version of

"Dawn of the Dead."

And so the Italian version came out eight months

before the American version.

So "Zombi 2", the movie we're watching tonight,

was already in production before

"Dawn of the Dead" came out in America.

There was actually a lawsuit to stop them from calling it

"Zombi 2", but Romero lost the lawsuit

because nobody can copyright the word "zombie."

All right, Ian, you've done

a lot of famous roles in your career.

Are you proud of this particular movie?

No.

[Laughter]No?

No. I had a wonderful time doing it.

I'm always rather embarrassed about it,

but I appreciate the fact that people love it.

I mean, you just can't get away from that.

It is a remarkable film

that people all over the world just take to.

And it's mostly because of the skill

of Fulci putting all the elements together.

It's exactly what you said, the cinematography.

It's a beautifully made movie, and it's made beautiful

by all those people that you've just sort of mentioned.

Was Lucio Fulci --

Would you call him a great artist?

No, I'd call him a great professional.

I mean, before I did the film,

there wasn't sort of the Internet,

so I didn't know what he'd done.

But when you look up what he's done,

his sort of background, his training,

he trained with the sort of best Italian film directors

that have ever been.

And I should have had, I think, a little more respect

for him as a filmmaker than I did when I did.

I just thought he did crappy films,

westerns and thrillers.

But I think he was a remarkable director.

And in this, somehow or other, he got together, you know,

the warp and weft of a film.

What makes it work, I mean, apart from all these

brilliant men that you've talked about,

I don't know what it is, but it's one of those things

they say, that if you can,

you know, get the essence of it and bottle it,

then you're going to make millions and millions of pounds.

That's what he's got in this film.

One of the problems I think Lucio Fulci had is that

when people met him in person,

they were not impressed by him.

You were showing me some pictures that you took

while you were on the set.

And Lucio always had a pipe that he smoked upside down.

He did, yeah.And it caused a lot --

Dribbled, yeah

He would set his T-shirt on fire and things like that.

He didn't have a great presence as a director, would you say?

He was a very unprepossessing sort of guy.

This is -- these photographs are from an article

I wrote and I say --

Austin, can you show these?

Okay.

I sort of took them by the tiny little camera,

which sort of got lost as soon as I'd taken these pictures.

These are behind the scenes photos

on "Zombie" that you took?

I just happened to be there with the camera there ready.

We were in the Dominican Republic,

staying in a beautiful sort of resort.

And they had originally intended to live

in a sort of Club Méditerranée type place

where you sort of pay for everything with shells.

But when the Italian crew got there,

there were geckos running around,

and there were especially geckos in the pan of the loos,

and that terrified them.

Oh, those giant iguana things?

The thought of a gecko disappearing up

their bottoms wasn't to their liking.

So they moved us from that into

this sort of wonderful resort.

But this was sort of on the sea,

and this first one was you can see

the people in it, the cameraman and assistant.

And there with a hat on, a Jacques Tati hat,

is our great hero.

And they were waiting for the boat to come in

to take them out to sea so that they could picture

the shot that they were going to get from there.

And so that second shot is them out in the boat.

And you can see they're all gesticulating like mad,

whether they're pointing out where Italy is,

where the sun is, where the horizon is,

I've got no idea, because I think when you look at

the next picture, they're going in the opposite direction.

And in the next picture --

They don't know where they're going?

This is it.

This great transatlantic sailor

decides that he is going to take the helm.

So he grabs --

Lucio, considers himself a great sailor,

Christopher Columbus of films.

[Laughter]

He decides to he's gonna show all these others

how you should do it, how a real pro should do it.

So he took the boat, they did the scene,

and then they came back to where we were

all sitting on the big boat and where I had the camera.

And he came in, this great sailor, at full speed.

He couldn't stop it.

He didn't, couldn't or wouldn't move it from side to side.

And he bashed into the side with a great clunk.

And a big hole.

I mean, a big hole appeared in the side.

And magically, because magically it is there.

You can see them.

The cameraman and his assistant are looking away.

This guy's got a huge grin on his face,

as if he thinks it's a big joke.

And he just looks like a poor little soul

who's just been caught.That's Lucio.

Lucio there. "I didn't do it."

"I didn't do it."

And then the last two, you can see on the jetty

that we're walking away as fast as we can.

Well, Al Cliver, and Tisa are walking away

as fast as they can because they don't want to get involved

in what they know is going to happen.

And so he marches down,

still with his pipe, to blame everyone in sight,

anyone near that boat,

that it was his fault that the boat was there.

The boat shouldn't have been there.

It wasn't a case of him steering the thing properly.

The boat shouldn't have been there.

This huge boat.

Okay, so Lucio Fulci was a hard man to love.

If I had to sum up the Lucio Fulci philosophy,

though, what you see in his films,

and I think this is what makes him so popular with horror fans,

it would be death is certain in his movies.

Death is certain.

Good intentions don't matter, noble goals don't matter.

Everyone and everything will be destroyed

by the end of the movie.

And so it's kind of a cinema of brutality and hopelessness.

There's a certain kind of like purity to that.

So our next guest is someone

that I invited to join us tonight

because he's the most evil person I know.

You know, he delights in evil.

Everybody, please welcome the AEW Wrestling star

Danhausen!

[Cheers and applause]

Hey-o!

Yeah. Hey!

How are you?

Very good. Very good.

Welcome.Yes, hello.

Hello. Yes.

Welcome to "Good Night Hausen with Danhausen?

That's right. They finally gave Danhausen

his own late night talk show.

Isn't it wonderful?

Uh...Danhausen. Danhausen?

It's not the Danhausen show. Sit over here.

They got the name right here.

Here you go. Sit right here. Sit right here. Sit right here.

Oh, okay.Yeah. Sit here.

-Hello. -Danhausen.

-Yes. -I have some questions for you.

Oh, okay.You're very evil.

That's true. All right.

You have brought evil into professional wrestling.

Oh, yes. I'm the originator of evil.

Yes. Mind control.

Take over the airwaves, whether it be

a television, radio, Internet, all those things.

Supernatural, laser power shooting out

of your fingernails.

That's the curse. Yes.Okay.

I threatened people, and it seems to work.

Now, many pro wrestlers from the old school

say that you don't belong in wrestling.

Ah, it's because I retired all of them.

They're very angry about that. They're retired.

It's a whole list of them.

What, because you've defeated them?

Yes, I defeated them, I sent them packing.

Now they sit at home and they don't make money like Danhausen.

Okay, now, when you take off your robes,

your evil robes in the ring,

is that Satan on your chest?

What is that on your chest?

Oh, it's a good friend of Danhausen.

I don't know.

[Laughter]

All right.

Tell him.I'll tell him later.

All right, well, we're watching "Zombie" tonight,

and this is the movie where death takes over the world.

Oh, that's wonderful.

Would you have any advice if we got into a situation like?

With zombies taking over?

Yeah, with zombies taking over the world.

Well, I did see this film once.

It's very good. It's terrifying.

Where they set traps when people are trying to

invade their home, and he puts cars on the floor.

He puts, what is it, ornaments from Christmas trees.

I think that would be a good way to prevent the zombies

from breaking into your home.

Yeah, I don't think we're talking about the same movie.

I think that's a different movie.

But, oh, and by the way, do you ever notice

Darcy the Mail Girl at the AEW matches?

She often sits on the first row.

Great fan housing.

Okay. Because she likes evil.

Yes.Don't you, Darcy?

Yes, I do.

Good friends with all the evil people there.

All the evil people.

So the two of you were kind of made for each other.

Ah! Evil!

Partners. Whoo!

All right.

What are you -- let me ask you this.

What do you think of people like Lucio Fulci,

who, they yell a lot in their attempts to create evil?

Because you're known for -- you're known for delivering evil

in a nice way.

Well, yes, I like to create a list of demands

and make people do things by threatening

to curse them and such.

Like the time you forced CM Punk, I have to say,

it's one of the funniest YouTube videos I've ever watched.

It's so good.I don't mean to be

laughing at you, but you forced CM Punk to buy you

some vintage comic books.

Oh, yes, he owes Danhausen many a moneys.

So I took him around, and I said,

"You must buy Danhausen..."

What was it? The first appearance of Wolverine.

We couldn't find the first appearance

of the Spider-Man's, but pretty close.

And he did buy it.

He did. Now Danhausen has all of them.

He's got the first appearance of Punisher.

He did not get me Dr. Doom, but I got Galactus.

That was good. He's very evil.

All right, well, we're going to release the zombies now.

Oh?

In the 1979 Italian classic "Zombie".

So, you have anything you'd like to curse before

we we go back to the "Zombie"?

Oh, yes. I suppose we shall keep it simple.

Love that Danhausen or be cursed!

[Cheers and applause]

Did you just curse our entire audience?

Not if they love him.

But not if they love me.

All right. Back to the movie.

Do you ever go to the -- do you ever like --

I've never seen you out of makeup, so I'm sorry.

Maybe that's not makeup, but do you ever

go to the drive up window at McDonald's or anything?

Oh, yes. They've got precious hamburgers there.

Yeah. What happens to them if they get your order wrong?

Simple. They're cursed.

Okay.

Ronald McDonald cursed. Everybody else cursed.

All right, and by the way, Ian McCulloch,

thank you for being with us.

Thank you.

Fabio, can we have something very nice and very evil

as we head for the thrilling conclusion of "Zombie"?

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Applause]

[Static crackles]

[Wind howling]

[Banging]

[Insects buzzing]

[Buzzing continues]

[Groans]

What about my wife?

Thank you.

[Grunting]

What the hell are they, Doctor?

I don't know.

[Insects buzzing]

It all started about three months ago.

One of the fishermen said he'd seen his wife

walking in the village at night.

Only she'd been dead for two days.

Well, at the time, nobody believed the story.

[Chuckles] In these islands, fantastic legends --

voodooism, zombies --

have been rife for centuries.

[Wind howling]

[Drumming in distance]

[Natives chanting in distance]

Menard: As a man of science, I don't believe in voodooism.

But the phenomenon defies logical explanation.

I've attempted to apply the disciplines of bacteriology,

virology, even of radiology.

We've performed tests,

epilepsy and for catalepsy.

[Sighs] Nothing fits!

[Banging]

[Wind howling]

[Banging continues]

Will that hold them? What do you think?

Not a chance.

How can we stop them?Here. Take this.

I've got another gun in my office.

There's two -- two drums of kerosene in the sacristy.

Right, Doc.

You two stay where you are. Watch those windows.

[Banging continues]

[Wind howling]

Nurse, come with me.

We've got to get some empty bottles.

All you can find.

[Zombies growling]

[Grunts]

[Wind howling]

[Screams]

[Screaming continues]

[Groans]

[Bones crunching]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Body thuds]

Dr. Menard?

Dr. Menard?

[Low growl]

[Screams]

[Flesh tearing]

[Groaning]

[Groaning continues]

[Whimpers]

♪♪

[Whimpers]

[Whimpering continues]

♪♪

[Screaming]

No!

No! No!

[Wood creaking]

Nurse: Oh.

Ohh!

No. No!

You bring some too. Come on!

[Whimpers]

[Screams]

[Banging]

[Banging continues]

Go get some more bottles.

[Screams]

[Glass shatters]

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshots]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshots]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshots]

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshot]

♪♪

[Gunshots]

♪♪

Brian, two more.

♪♪

♪♪

[Gunshot]

Let's get out of here! Go!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Gasps]

♪♪

[Grunts]

[Grunts]

♪♪

[Gasps]

♪♪

♪♪

-[Screams] -[Flesh tearing]

[Screaming]

Shoot her, West!

Shoot her!

What are you waiting for?!

♪♪

Come on, Brian. Let's get to the boat.

[Explosion]

Can't we go any faster?

The driveshaft could go any second.

We'll make for San Cristobal.

There's a yard there that we can fix --

What is it? Brian!

I feel so cold. So cold.

[Shivers] I don't want to become like...

Take me home, Peter.

Save me.

Save me.

[Shivering]

[Stammering]

Susan.

[Sobs]

[Gasping]

[Groaning]

He's dead.

What do we do now?

Lock him in the bilge.

Take him back with us to the States.

Someone there might be able to do something.

But we can't risk it.

You know what he might turn into.

Well, I'll make sure that he's safe.

We've got to take him back with us.

He's the only proof we've got that this all happened.

And we will need proof unfortunately.

Otherwise, they'll just think that we're crazy.

I don't care.

I feel dead myself.

Take the wheel.

Let's see if we can find something more cheerful

on the radio.

Man on radio: The latest news --

The situation here in New York City since

the discovery of the first zombie

is getting worse by the hour.

There's chaos in the streets.

The National Guard cannot control the situation.

In every borough of the city, from Brooklyn to Manhattan,

from Harlem to Queens, the zombies are taking over.

The governor has declared a state of national emergency

and has asked the president for immediate assistance.

The zombies are everywhere.

There seems to be no way to stop them.

The city is at their mercy.

[Rattling] According to latest reports

-from police headquarters -- -[Low growl]

The inhuman creatures are gathering and seem to be heading

towards Central Park.

Barricades have been thrown up throughout Manhattan.

General Steiner of the National Guard

says missiles will be used if necessary.

I've just been informed that zombies

have entered the building.

They're at the door! They're coming in!

[Screaming]

[Car horns blaring]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Static crackles]

[Cheers and applause]

And so we close on that final image of the zombies

shuffling across the Brooklyn Bridge

toward Manhattan as the traffic races beneath them.

Legendary shot.

Not just because it's a great image and a great ending,

but because Fulci didn't have permission

to be on the Brooklyn Bridge,

much less be shooting a movie there.

And let's start with that. Why the Brooklyn Bridge?

If you're going to try to avoid detection,

why not use the Queensboro Bridge

or the Manhattan Bridge or the Williamsburg Bridge?

But no, he had to shoot on the Brooklyn Bridge.

So it's one thing to steal an image

here and there without asking permission.

But when they met the day before they did this

and all of Fulci's people on the crew told him,

"You're not going to be able to do that.

It's going to take too much time.

You have all those zombies that have to be made up."

You know, you're talking all the zombies

and the crew up on the bridge?

You're going to get arrested before you even

turn on the camera.

That's just too much time to be up there.

And Fulci goes true,

"True. Let's try it anyway."

And so they find some bums on the street

and they offer them 40 bucks

if they'll agree to be zombies for the day.

And they do all the makeup on them in advance

at another location, they put the zombies in a van

so that they can't be seen.

They have a couple of other vans for the crew.

They go to the Brooklyn entrance to the bridge,

and Fulci says, "Okay, go."

And they all jump out of the vans.

He wanted one close up and one long shot.

Well, they got a lot more than that.

They just kept shooting and shooting and shooting.

They got footage that looks like it was planned for weeks,

but they were on and off that bridge

before anybody noticed them.

The cars noticed, of course.

All the cars were honking,

you know, but they weren't shooting sound on it,

so didn't matter.

Guerrilla filmmaking at its finest.

Zombie was a huge hit worldwide.

The worm faced zombie that rose up out of the grave

was used on the poster with the famous tagline

"We are going to eat you."

And it's fair to say that it revolutionized

the Italian film industry.

You know, we talked about this when we were showing

"Black Sunday."

The Italians call genre periods "Filoni".

It means vein, like the veins in a goldmine.

You know, you work that filoni until it plays out.

And so suddenly zombies and brutal, fatalistic horror,

that's the new filoni.

They had gone through successive periods

of sword and sandal movies, gothic horror, westerns,

giallo thrillers, comedies, police movies.

In fact, Lucio Fulci was originally a comedy director.

That's what he was known for.

They went through cannibal movies, of course.

But now "Zombie" changed Lucio Fulci's career,

and that's pretty much all he did for the rest of his life,

with very few exceptions.

In fact, Fabio, come on over. Let's talk about -- yeah.

[Cheers and applause]Yeah!

Yeah, let's talk about Lucio just a little bit before

we say goodbye.

Before we say goodbye to "Zombie"...

Yeah....how many Fulci films

did you do?

A lot. 10 in my life.

10? 10.

10 Lucio Fulci films.

1975, 1990.

Oh, for 15 years, you did Lucio Fulci films.

And the earliest one was a spaghetti western, right?

It was "I quattro dell'apocalisse"

with, uh...

Who starred in that?

Um...there was Fabio Testi.

Oh, Fabio Testi.

There was Lynne Frederick. Maybe you remember.

Okay.

And then there was Michael Pollard.

Okay.The one of "Bonnie and Clyde."

All right. Was it a successful spaghetti Western?

Mm. Okay.

But is that where you met Fulci?

Yeah, it was.

I was with my trio.

In that moment, I had the trio.

Bixio Frizzi Tempera.

And our publisher told us.

It was also Tomas Milian in that movie.

Tomas. Okay.

And our publisher told us

there is a beautiful western to do.

Go and try to talk with that man.

So we went.

It was a screening, you know, for consolation.

I mean, it was --

Can tell you in Italian because it's better for me?

Go ahead. Go ahead, and I'll try

to follow along in Italian.

[Speaking Italian]

And we tried, and it went very well.

And from there, from that moment,

Lucio was a friend, and we started working with him.

And so you're saying that a big part of it

was that he loved the song "Knocking on Heaven's Door"?

Yeah. And that made you

want to want to work with him?

Yeah, because, you know, you know, Italian,

Italian cinema, you know very well.

When something goes well in America,

in that time, they wanted to do ones similar.

And "Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid"

had the soundtrack by Bob Dylan.

So the idea of the producer was,

now we do a similar soundtrack.

So he's saying, "Do the Italian version

of Bob Dylan songs."If you want.

And that appealed to you.

Yeah, and I can tell you that I do it in concert.

I think now I sing by myself, and people love it so much

because the inspiration was there.

I was loving American music since I was a kid.

So it was -- I cannot say easy.

But in a way, it was easy.

Right.

Would you say that working on "Zombie",

which I didn't know until you told me tonight,

you had one week.

You had one week to do the score.

To record. To write, some more time.

But in studio, it was usually three days to do

the basic whole and all that.

And then three days to do the other instruments.

Strings.

And then mix it.

So one week.

And are you doing all the sounds?

I wrote everything, and I had Maurizio Guarini

as a keyboard player.

Okay.And then Adriano Giordanella,

as you know the percussion...

ba-do-ba-dum.

Okay. All right.

And then a band for the other the other tracks.

Right. How did it -- How did it work?

Did he -- did you show the music to Fulci?

Did he reject very much of what you did?

No.

He let you go along with it.

He didn't have time.

[Laughs]

He had to put the movie out.

Now, let's say that with Lucio,

I don't know why, but very rarely we had

some problems.

Obviously, he let me see the movie.

We talked about --

You know, one thing that maybe nobody told you,

but in particular, for horror movies,

he knew what people wanted.

He was sure to know what people wanted to do.

He had an adjective that he used,

Italian adjective.

I never said, but he said

[Speaking Italian]

Means that he wanted to get in the place of the head

where starts starts the brain.

He wanted to get there,

and he was sure that if he found,

if he could find.

That way, he had won.

The movie was going to sell.

Yeah. Right.

Just, one time on "City of the Living Dead",

I used to put one song that he did not know

on the beginning, in the main title.

And he did not like at all, and it was really a tragedy.

But afterwards we put

another another song, another track.

So you were yelled at by Lucio?

No.

I was absolutely afraid in this moment.

Well, many people comment on the fact

that Fulci's images are brutal.

But they're often juxtaposed with music

that you write for him,

which is kind of lilting and optimistic.

Did you guys ever talk about that?

Yeah, I think that he loved this kind.

I mean, optimistic, maybe it's too much.

But I must admit that I love melody.

I love telling things that happen here, not...

Right.

And I think that it goes very well.

For example... [Speaking Italian]

[Vocalizing melody]

Is something quite classical.

But when you see in "The Beyond"

the main themes, it works a lot.

By the way, was he musical himself?

Was Lucio Fulci musical?

Yeah, yeah, Lucio was --

He had a great culture in many, many, many directions.

You could talk to him, speak to him about many things.

And he loved music.

He was friends with great jazz, you know...

He was a jazz guy?

Yeah. He loved so much.

And after he's dead, I met again, Antonella.

His daughter? His daughter.

And she told me, "You cannot imagine how

my dad loved you and your music."

But Lucio never told me.He would never tell you?

No, because I told you,

I think he was a little shy or something.

But when she told me like this.

It's like if a father tells you something after.

He doesn't want to give you too much.

Yeah. Too much leverage.

Yeah, maybe he wanted to not see himself too weak.

Too soft. Yeah. Yeah.

All right, well, we're getting ready to show

"The Beyond"...[Cheers and applause]

...which is quite a bit more complicated musically, right?

Yes, it is.

You know, every musician, every artist,

I think you know, as well, when is young,

thinks to the perfect thing he wants to do.

And in that situation, Lucio believed in me quite a lot.

There was some money so I could also have a small,

a medium orchestra.

And I tried to write my first masterpiece, let's say.

And I was very, very happy because my band,

Fabio Pignatelli from Goblin, was at bass,

and I had always great musicians, like my musicians.

I had always the chance to have good people around me.

Because, you know, a composer without

good musician is nothing.

Yeah, well, it is one of your,

I guess one of your most famous scores, right?

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

And, okay, well, we'll talk more later.

Okay.So thank you for being here.

Thank you for inviting me.

We need you to play us off.

You're amazing.

-We need you to play us off. -Okay.

-Go, huh? -Yeah.

And we'll talk to you in the second movie,

but thank you.

Darcy, you got some mail bag?

Or are we not doing mailbag?

I always have mailbag.

-Okay. -Okay.

I was really moved by the envelope on this letter.

The envelope? Oh.

Darcy: Look at it. It's amazing.

Okay. Kind of a -- all right.

Kind of a collage thing.

It's from Sean Corcoran of Peoria, Arizona.

Sean. Okay.

All right, "Dear Joe Bob."

Wow, there's a lot of stuff going on here.

There's a lot of art.All right.

"Dear Joe Bob, sorry for the over-share,

but in 2011, when I was 23, I had a traumatic brain injury.

When I woke up in the hospital, my older brother,

who I grew up watching "MonsterVision" with,

helped me make sure I hadn't lost cognitive function

or worse, my voluminous knowledge of genre

and exploitation films that I soaked up

from idolizing and aspiring to be you for my first 13 years.

Luckily, I amazed doctors

by not only having retained my memory with full recall

and the ability to mentally still access

almost all of a massive amount of information

and anecdotes that I inherited from you, Joe Bob,

tons of your jokes."

I'm sorry.

It's like tons of my jokes?

"Even really long ones, I could still remember them

more or less verbatim off the top of my head.

"Last Drive-In" is really the only thing I have had

for many years now that makes me unfailingly happy and excited.

I had vision loss significant enough

that I'm partially blind and I can't drive,

so I haven't been able to go out to our local drive in,

the Glendale 9 in Phoenix.

But as long as I have "Last Drive In",

I don't even miss going out and doing stuff Fridays

because I consider you and Darcy my best and only true friends.

A situation that I'm more than satisfied with."

So...

So thanks for being my best friend, Joe Bob and Darcy."

And then he signed it here in blood or something.

It's like he signed it in red with a little heart.

Something that looks like blood.

Sean Corcoran, Peoria, Arizona.

Sean, you need to record all those jokes

and send them to me because I could use them.

I don't remember those at all. I have a terrible memory.

But we're very proud to be your best friends, right, Darcy?

Of course.Yeah.

You don't even warn me. You don't even --

You just nuke me with these emotional letters.

We were just in Phoenix.

We didn't realize Sean was right there.

We could have done a drop in.

What happened to the days when the letters would be,

"Joe Bob, you ignorant moron.

You don't know what you're talking about"?

What happened to those?I mean,

do you want some of those?Yeah!

I mean, yeah, it would liven things up a little bit.

All right. I got plenty of those.

Plenty? Plenty.

You got plenty of those?

Yes. All right.

Maybe I don't want those. All right.

How do you like our talk show format?

I'm loving it.Really?

Yeah.You know, well,

it gets better in the second half.

And you know why?

More guests, less of me talking about the movie.

So, you know, a lot of people

like "The Beyond" more than they like "Zombie."

A lot of people are wrong.

Because you love "Zombie."

I mean, who doesn't?

Okay, well, we should probably sign off.

Fabio has done a "Zombie" march for us.

Can you play us off with that?

This is Joe Bob Briggs reminding you

that a bartender is just a pharmacist

with a limited inventory, and the drive in will never die.

You loved my zombie jokes in the opening monologue.

Sure.You loved them, right?

Of course.

I have more.

I mean, that's okay. We're good.

These are better.

They would really have to be.

Um...

What do you call a zombie sleep over?

A mass grave.

[Laughter]

What did you guys say after killing nine zombies

and six vampires?

"I wonder why they were carrying bags of candy."

[Laughter]

Okay.

What do Middle Eastern zombies eat?

Bahrains.

[Laughter]

Hm. Yeah.

What is a zombie call a penis?

Junk food.

[Laughter]

That's a good one.

What do zombies eat to freshen their breath?

Men-tos.

[Groaning]

All right.Okay, I'm going to stop.

I mean, why now?

♪♪

What do zombies say when somebody falls on the floor?

"Five second rule."

[Laughter]

[Laughs] Hi-oh!

[Laughter]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

[Static crackles]