Original subtitles

-I'm Joe Bob Briggs with Darcy the Mail Girl,

continuing our Phantom of the Opera

100th birthday celebration!

-Whoo!

-And to give you some idea of just

how flexible the Phantom story is,

we are moving from the 1925 Foundation film,

which we just watched, to the weirdest, most twisted,

most bizarre version Dario Argento's 1987

gore fest "Opera." -Whoo!

-People call this a giallo film.

I mean, what do you think, Darcy?

Is this a giallo film?

-I think it's a giallo.

It's just kind of an unconventional one.

-Agreed about the unconventional.

It has the black gloves.

It has the mysterious kills,

but it doesn't have the intricate plotting

of a traditional giallo.

-Plus, the Phantom is not really disfigured.

-Well, he becomes disfigured in the course of the movie.

-But it's not his motivation.

-Correct.

Anyway, the giallo era was really just about over

by 1987.

Italian filmmakers were looking for some new genre

to replace those.

They were making these violent crime movies called

Poliziotteschi, extremely lurid action movies,

films that didn't really cross the pond.

Not many of those films made it to American theaters.

Anyway, "Opera", like anything else

that Dario Argento ever made,

is too weird to fit into a genre anyway.

He really made this movie

because he was pissed off after getting fired

from an opera festival.

Now, I've been in show business and publishing

and film long enough to know

that you're going to get censored

and you're going to get fired.

You have to just move on. Dario Argento does not move on.

He is hypersensitive about every single offense.

Every time two seconds got cut out of one

of his films by a ratings board,

every time somebody disrespects him in any way.

So the genesis of this movie

is that he was invited to produce the opera Rigoletto

at a famous summer festival in Italy.

Darcy, I'm going to tell this whole story.

Is that okay?

-I know that you are. -All right.

I have to tell the story because it's so Italian.

It has all these elements that can only happen in Italy.

Okay, so there's this summer opera festival in the small town

of Macerata, the middle of nowhere.

Macerata is notable for only one thing.

It has this giant stadium called a sferisterium.

A sferisterium is what was used 200 years ago

for the most popular sport in Italy,

200 years ago, called

which translates into ball with bracelet

because they had these professional teams

all over Italy, and everybody bet on the games,

and the athletes were the best paid sportsmen in Europe.

This thing was the NFL of its day,

and if I had to describe it -- nobody can describe it really,

because I think it's still played in only one little town

in Italy, and they've changed all the rules today.

But basically it's two teams. There's three guys on each team.

And they wore these giant wooden maces on their arms.

It's like wearing a King Kong beast glove.

Isn't that what you call the thing on King Kong's arm

in the newest King Kong movie? -I'm sorry.

Are you telling a story about an extinct Italian sport right now?

-I am, yes.

I'm telling a story about an extinct Italian sport.

-Okay, I was just making sure. -So they wear

these wooden bats

that are carved especially for each person.

They fit on their arm perfectly, and they have

these pointy protuberances, sharp things,

more than a hundred of them on the bat, on your arm.

And you would wear this 4 pound wooden thing on your arm,

and you would hit a leather ball.

I'm surprised the leather ball didn't just stick to your arm,

because these things were like porcupines.

You had like 100 pointy things on your arm.

And then the rules were a little like tennis

and a little like Jai alai,

except it was on this huge field.

It was almost as big as a football field,

and you could bounce the leather ball

off a side wall like handball.

But if your town had a sferisterio, a sferitorium,

that was this huge sports arena, and Macerata had one,

they had it then and they still have it today.

And since nobody plays anymore,

they use it for open air opera in the summer.

And the orchestra pit in this thing is so big

that the musicians at the opposite ends

of the orchestra pit cannot hear each other.

So the point I'm trying to get across

is that if you stage something on this stage,

it's got to be big, it's got to be huge.

It's got to plunk you over the head

and amaze all your senses from 80 yards away.

So I can see why they wanted Dario Argento.

They knew he would go big with it.

Plus, you know, the story of Rigoletto, anyway,

it has jealousy, betrayal, moral corruption, seducing of virgins,

a hunchback, kidnapping, murder, hitmen.

It has all this stuff that Argento already does,

right, Darcy?

-Are you asking me the the plot of Rigoletto?

-Well, I know you've been to a lot of operas.

You've probably been to more operas than I have.

-That doesn't mean I remember even one

of the plots. I just -- someone dies.

-Okay, well, they give you that synopsis thing

when you go to the, you know,

so you can tell what's happening.

-So I used to hang out with this dude who,

like, loved opera.

-So you saw a lot of operas. -Yeah.

-Anyway, here's the problem with Argento doing Rigoletto.

Rigoletto was written by Verdi. He's the big guy.

Isn't he like the Tom Brady of Italian composers?

Verdi.

-You're not asking me to rate opera composers right now.

-I am asking you to rate opera composers.

-I am -- I am not qualified for that.

I am not into opera. I went to a lot of opera.

-You have told me about opera.

-I'm just not into operas.

-Okay, well, I'm not into operas either,

but at least some of them have good plots.

And so Argento gets excited about doing one

of the summer operas.

He starts working on the show with Sergio Stivaletti,

the guy who was doing all the gore effects for "Demons"

and the other movies.

So you know it was going to be bloody.

And he basically -- what he did is he talked about it too much.

He said he was going to change the setting to the Viking era,

and the Duke of Mantua was going to be a vampire,

and he was planning a big ballet number that was

in the style of Busby Berkeley musicals in the '50s --

in the '30s, and he was going to put

mild electrical shockers under the seats,

like William Castle did in "The Tingler."

And so they wanted to go big.

Argento was going to go big,

but two things stopped him.

One, it was a Verdi opera.

It was beloved.

Italians know all the words to it.

They know what's supposed to happen.

But even more important, the previous year,

the festival had hired Ken Russell to direct La Boheme,

and he had loaded it up with Nazi icons.

He had the Mimi character die of a heroin overdose,

and people got really upset about that.

So the thinking on the board of the sferisterium was, well,

if they got that upset over the French opera,

think what they're going to do

when this horror director fucks with Verdi.

So they fired Argento.

-La Boheme is not a French opera.

-What? -Sorry.

-I thought you weren't into opera.

-I mean, sometimes I remember stuff.

La Boheme was actually an Italian opera by Puccini.

-La Boheme is Italian? But has a French name?

-That's true.

-Okay, well, gouge my guts out with a dirty stick.

So Dario Argento goes,

"Fuck the Macerata sferisterium.

I'm too deep into this opera stuff.

I'm going to do a huge opera movie.

I'm not just going to mess with a festival in a small town.

I'm going to blow up the whole opera culture,

and I'm going to do it with a perverted version

of the first movie I ever saw, 'Phantom of the opera.'"

Only he saw the one with Claude Rains.

His parents took him to it when he was 4,

and I'm actually surprised that it made any impression on him

at all, because it's probably the tamest of all the Phantoms.

But anyway, he started making plans for "Opera",

which would end up being his most expensive movie.

Uh, $8 million budget.

And of the $8 million,

$760,000 of the budget was spent on just one scene,

which I guess is typical Argento.

-So have you arrived at the moment yet

when you were going to speak of tonight's movie?

-Well, I am speaking of tonight's movie,

but I want to do a rant first, though.

-Was that not the rant?

Oh, my God. -No, that was a preliminary

story setting up "Opera" the movie.

There was no ranting,

but I actually had some thoughts on the fact

that we've been talking about the 1920s tonight.

Right? -Yes.

-And now we're in the 2020s.

And when I was researching the 1920s,

I came to the conclusion that most of us

would have been happier in that earlier decade,

100 years ago, even though it's 100 years ago,

and we're the nation of progress,

it's supposed to make life better and better, right?

-I am not sure I agree with that, actually.

-You don't think people would have been happier in 1920?

-I don't think people know what they mean

when they say progress. -Well, that's true,

but most people would say that life gets progressively easier

and safer and happier, right?

-So what makes you think the '20s were so great?

-Well, first of all,

I noticed when researching the people involved

with "Phantom of the Opera"

that most of the people are happy and energetic.

-Didn't you say everyone was

fighting on the set of "Phantom"?

-Yes, but they were fighting about the movie.

They weren't fighting about who's a good person

and who's not a good person, like people do on the Internet.

They're kind of like, live and let live.

-Okay. -At the time.

So look at the stuff that happened in the 1920s, right?

The biggie is women get the right to vote.

-True.

-Okay. I mean, way overdue in 1920.

But now that we're 100 years later,

people still say, oh, look, the first woman to do this,

or we need a strong woman character

because we don't have enough of them,

or we need to stand up for the rights of women,

or women should be paid the same as men.

I mean, we've had 100 years.

I mean, after all this time,

should we still be talking about it?

They did the tough work in the 1920s.

Why are we still dicking around? It shouldn't be an issue.

We're not as enlightened as they were.

We couldn't follow up and just make everything equal.

-Okay, that's a rant. -All right.

-And a fair point. -All right.

And they always say two things about the '20s,

flappers and jazz.

They call it the Jazz Age

because it's at the beginning of jazz.

So they invented this musical genre

that we're still using today.

In fact, they have schools of jazz today.

They teach it, they celebrate it.

There are jazz clubs in my neighborhood.

So they invented a style of music

that's still alive 100 years later.

What style of music have we invented that will be studied

and celebrated in the 2120s, 100 years from now?

Synthwave? I think not. You know, Eurodance?

Hell, no.

You know, everything today is a rehash.

It's a fusion of stuff from before.

-You've really thought about this.

-Yeah, I mean, the last big, real

change in music was rock n roll.

That was in the '50s. Well, maybe hip hop.

Hip hop starts in the '70s, but that's still 50 years ago.

So when they talk about the flappers,

what they're really talking about is women.

Women went wild. They went wild.

Once they got the vote, they went --

They were dancing like crazy, but they weren't just dancing.

It was a time of great sexual freedom, too.

And in fact, when you read the backgrounds

of all these silent film stars, half of the women

and a large percentage of the men were bisexual,

which makes sense because they came from the theater

or the circus or vaudeville, and working on the stage

was always this free love type of atmosphere,

but they were not uptight about it.

If you were basically a straight person,

but you dabbled in gay on the side,

that was not considered weird.

The silent star Nazimova,

she didn't lose her job because she ran this big lesbian salon.

F.W. Murnau, the guy who did "Nosferatu",

he could live with his partner, nobody cared about it.

The moral crusades against gay people came after that.

Mae West, she modeled her act after drag queens.

She said, "I am a drag queen

who happens to be a biological woman."

So -- -So what's your point?

-Everybody was happy, and live and let live.

Or most people were happy,

and they didn't have so many social rules.

I think partly this is

because they had two big catastrophes at the end

of the prior decade.

They had World War I, which was nasty.

People had never seen anything like that, 40 million dead.

And then 50 million dead in the Spanish flu,

much worse than COVID.

So a fifth of the world population was killed,

but they got over it.

They were partying. Prices got better.

They had actual deflation.

-The country paid off a third of its national debt in the '30s.

We just keep raising the national debt today.

It doesn't matter who's in office,

we're just raising the national debt.

So people had a strong dollar.

Everybody bought a car.

Uh, they invented stuff that we still use today.

The refrigerator, the vacuum cleaner, the washing machine.

Advent of radio created mass entertainment for the first time

on a national level.

They're just loving life. Calvin Coolidge was president.

He was known as the do nothing president.

He believed in limited government.

So he tried to constantly do nothing.

That's the kind of president I love.

You know, they decided the immigration numbers

had gotten out of control.

So they had this working theory

that when immigration gets to 15% of the population,

people start to get uncomfortable.

So you just cut off visas until it goes back under 5%,

then you turn it back on.

So they'd cut off the spigot of immigration at 15%,

let it go back to 5%, turn it back on.

And then the idea that once the Italians and the Irish

and the other nationalities assimilate,

they'll open it back up again, which is what they did.

They just solved it. They discovered penicillin,

which wiped out a lot of stuff, including syphilis.

What did we discover? New anti-anxiety drugs,

which I predict will not be still in use

in the next century.

In other words, they're having a good time.

Great writers -- Hemingway, Fitzgerald, Faulkner.

Who wouldn't give a flip about AI.

If you told Hemingway, "Hey, AI is going to take your job,"

they would have laughed at that idea.

Name one novelist writing today

who is guaranteed to be read 100 years from now.

Anyway, I could go on, but... -You probably shouldn't, though.

-I have to, though, because I just thought of something else.

Airlines were started that still exist today.

I would have been happy in the '20s.

Everybody had a job. Everybody was making money.

Yes, it fell apart in 1929 right at the end.

But that doesn't take away the years

when everybody was grooving.

We could all buy a car.

And yes, there were no interstates.

But is that such a bad thing?

We would have to travel on highways

that went down the main streets of cities.

Interstates destroyed many of those cities.

All right, I just think it was an optimistic time.

The Harlem Renaissance,

great explosion of black art, black culture.

Everybody's dancing. That's my only point.

How come we're much more gloomy and pessimistic

100 years later?

They started building the Hoover Dam.

Built it in five years, on time, under budget.

We can't even build a high speed rail line from LA

to San Francisco, a relatively short distance, in 25 years.

And that's the most optimistic projection of it.

We invented railroads!

We built the Continental Railroad in six years!

It's called the Continental Railroad

because it goes across the whole continent!

-You alright?

-Do you have a way to connect this to the movie?

-Yes, of course I do. -I don't think you do.

-Let me think about it, though.

All right, bottom line, we got lazy and whiny

somehow in the past hundred years.

-Okay, what does that have to do with "Opera"?

-I'm not sure, but I'll figure it out.

-Okay. -What have here, though,

is the sensitive story of a beautiful,

young opera singer named Betty

who lands the lead role in Verdi's Macbeth --

Just keep going.

-In the Scottish play after the diva who's

scheduled to sing it is plowed down by a car.

Except taking the gig brings Betty to the attention

of a mysterious figure who starts murdering

everybody around her.

Plus, he ties her up while he's doing it

and forces her to watch by taping needles to her eyelids

so that if she closes her eyes, she gets stabbed in the eyeball.

Sure, we've seen it before,

but have we seen it with vigilante ravens gouging

out eyeballs to exact vengeance? I think not.

Let's take a look at those drive in totals.

We have eight dead bodies.

I'm not counting invisible bodies described in flashbacks.

Multiple dead ravens or crows. I'm not sure what they are.

Two breasts. Coat hook impalement.

Opera singer bondage.

Repeated eyelid needle torture. Dagger to the neck.

Strangulation. Scissors to the chest.

One bullet through the peephole.

One angry diva. One motor vehicle accident.

One case of stage fright. Air vent lurking.

Costume mutilation. Bracelet swallowing.

Vengeance seeking ravens or crows.

I'm not sure. Eyeball rolls. Mommy issues.

Self-immolation. One run down the Alps.

One flying tackle. Rock to the head.

One crawl through the flowers.

Gratuitous Verdi gratuitous backstage chaos.

Iron fu, Raven fu.

Drive In Academy Award nominations for Ian Charleson

as Marco, the horror film director

who wants to transition to directing opera for saying,

"I always jerk off before I shoot a scene."

Urbano Barberini for devising the eyelid needle torture.

And Cristina Marsillach as the tormented ingenue

who says, "Whenever a woman has a problem,

men always presume it's love,"

and, "I am nothing like my mother."

Three and a half stars. Joe Bob says check it out.

You know, the other thing I would love

about the 1920s?

My mind is just going crazy over the 1920s.

People answered their damn phone.

You had to because you didn't know who was calling.

And sometimes you answered somebody else's phone

because you were on a party line.

You shared the line with a neighbor.

You think carrying a phone around all the time

has made life better or worse?

-It's made life complicated, but better in a lot of ways,

but actually also worse than a lot of ways.

Actually, I can see both sides. I don't know.

-I think it's worse. -Okay.

-The only person I have known in the last 15 years

who still answered his phone was a guy named Jack Limpert.

He was the editor of the Washingtonianmagazine.

I used to write for the Washingtonian,

big magazine, and he was the editor.

And you'd call his office and he'd say, "Hey, it's Jack."

Without knowing who's calling. Who would do that now?

-Nobody. -I mean, exactly.

Jack just died, bless his heart.

He just died last September.

So now there's nobody. He was the last guy.

Everybody checks the caller ID and then thinks about it

for a while, right?

-Or never gives out the number in the first place.

-Or never gives out the number.

Besides, you're not really carrying a phone.

You're carrying a computer.

I don't really want to carry a computer.

-I do.

-It's constantly telling me stuff I don't need to know.

-Like what?

-The exact time.

I don't need to know that. The exact temperature.

I don't need to know how much I paid for bourbon

at the liquor store,

where somebody saw Bruno Mars on the street.

Don't need to know any of it.

Your phone, though, I have seen that.

I have seen the face of your phone on a normal day

when it just scrolls endlessly.

You've got tens of thousands of messages on your phone.

-I actually do. -And I believe

that somehow you can actually read those.

-Oh, yeah, let's say yes.

-So maybe the world has advanced in 100 years.

Maybe this is the answer.

The brain has been trained to work at hyper speed,

but only in people who are wired for social media like yourself.

-Guilty.

-You truly should enter a cellphone agility contest.

You would smoke the opposition.

You could read "War and Peace" in like 20 minutes.

-I mean, honestly, yeah.

-How are we doing back there in the makeup room?

-Oh, we're building up the makeup.

Slime always goes on right before he's in front of camera,

so we'll save that for when the mask comes off

for the big reveal.

-No. I can't concentrate.

Please. maestro, I'm sorry, but I can't carry on like this.

-Let's take it from number 37.

-Oh, my God! No, no.

Maestro, please, let's take it from

-Stop it! Stop, stop!

I can't stand it anymore. It's ridiculous!

-Poor thing, are you hurt?

-It's ridiculous!

This is "Macbeth" by Giuseppe Verdi.

I've never seen such lousy direction.

-We have a problem? -Yes, you!

This isn't one of your crumby movies.

Birds on stage, back projection, laser beams.

What is this, an opera or an amusement park?

I have to sing!

How can I do that with a raven on stage that hates me!

-I can't imagine why it should hate you, Mara.

-Neither can I!

But, it never takes its beady eyes off of me.

It shrieks, whistles, flaps its wings,

it's deliberately destroying my performance.

-It's just a bird. -Yes, and birds

should be with other birds,

and not in the opera singing "Macbeth."

Where's the manager? Where's Baddini?

-I'm here, Mara. -I'm going back to the hotel.

-Come on, Mara, please don't be like that.

-Stop it. I rest till 7:00.

I should be ready to sing at 8:00.

Ready to sing, without ravens or any other nonsense.

A real opera.

-So, what do we do now?

-Oh, carry on with the rehearsal.

If something like this, happens again,

I'll take my ravens and leave. -Okay, okay.

Maestro. Maestro, please, please.

We'll take it from the.

-Thanks to you and your so called brilliant

and original direction.

-Ladies and gentlemen!

The great Mara Czekova has been knocked out by a car.

Shit.

-Is she badly hurt? -Quickly,

someone call an ambulance, hurry.

-Hell, what a disaster. -What are we going to do?

-Hello?

-Is that you, Betty? -Yes.

-Tonight you make your debut as Lady Macbeth.

-What? -Are you happy?

-Who's speaking?

Is this a joke?

Hello?

Hello?

Mira.

-Come on, Betty. Come on, get ready.

In exactly one hour, you've got to be on stage.

Madam Czekova has had an accident. Here.

-Someone already called. I thought it was a joke.

-Why are you crying? Are you scared of making your debut?

-No. But Lady Macbeth?

I'm too young, my voice isn't right.

-You'll be a smash hit. A baby lady.

-I'm afraid I won't reach some of the notes.

-Oh, trust me Betty,

I'm not only your agent, I'm your friend,

I know what you're going through.

Just opening night nerves.

Don't let them show. Now, they're all coming to see you.

Betty Nemiro-mac, don't show them how unconfident you are.

Okay? Right. -Stop!

Well, my dear Betty. Are we ready?

Mara's unfortunate little accident

is going to speed you towards your destiny.

Tonight, you will make your debut in Verdi's "Macbeth."

Do I see tears? Tears of happiness, I hope.

Don't tell me you're afraid. Afraid you'll fail?

-I'm too young for the role.

-Oh, Verdi's first Lady Macbeth was only 17.

Anyway, you know the opera by heart.

I watched you at all rehearsals working so hard.

Preparing yourself, as though,

as though you were the star and not the understudy.

Don't worry about the orchestra.

They'll only need half an hour's rehearsal.

-Excellent.

-Come on, stop it. This is your big chance.

-I know.

-Think of your mother.

Think how happy and proud she would have been to see you

in a great opera, following her career.

And, if people like you,

next day you'll sing in New York and Salzburg.

-What happened to Mara?

-She got hit by a car, or so I heard.

-Ah, you were listening

to Brokofsky's recording of Macbeth.

Did you know it was a production of ours?

1975. -Yes.

It's the opera. "Macbeth" brings bad luck.

-What are you talking about?

-Everyone says it.

"Macbeth" brings bad luck.

It's a great opera,

but I would much rather make my debut in something else.

-Don't let Baddini hear you say that.

-It's true. -Shut up.

-So, you think this opera brings bad luck, huh?

-I don't know, it's what everyone says.

-Well, I don't say it.

Look, you have a wonderful voice, you're very beautiful,

and you're making your debut in a great theater.

You must make the most of this opportunity.

It usually only happens, to people in the movies, eh?

Mm-hmm. Don't throw it away.

-Yeah.

-Five, four, three, two, one.

Now.

Let them through, let them through.

-There's too much smoke.

There's too much smoke.

-Dino, Dino, cut the smoke. Cut the smoke.

Wait a second.

No, no, no. The scar, it should be on the other side.

-Betty goes on in another two minutes.

-Okay, two minutes for Betty.

-She's got two minutes. -Two minutes. Two.

-Oh, what are you doing? -Leave it. Just leave it.

Put it in the center.

No, no, no, no.

-No, no! Wrong way.

-Standing by, please.

-Leave it to me.

-You like this. -Leave it!

-Count, one, two, three and then go on!

-Be careful. Be careful not to ruin the costume.

-You finally returned.

-What are you doing here? You're not allowed in here.

This box is for stage personnel only. Come on, let's go.

What the hell do you --

-Stay where you are, keep your positions.

-Don't move.

It was an accident, nothing more.

Okay? -Just one minute.

Okay, Maestro.

-Bravo! Bravo!

-Betty! Betty!

-Encore! Encore!

- Well done, Betty. - You're so beautiful.

-That's enough, Mara. Don't be childish.

You're a star.

-You really think so?

-Didn't you hear the applause? -Bravo.

-You're wonderful. Wonderful.

-Betty, my sincerest compliments.

You were sensational. -Thank you.

-There'll be a first night party later on.

-Thank you.

-Betty, you were magnificent.

-Thank you, Maestro. -Will you be at the reception?

-Yes. -The press will love it.

-You still believe this opera is unlucky?

-The press are here.

-What about the accident, with the lights?

The shouting and the screaming.

-What shouting and screaming?

-You didn't hear it? -No.

-It came from one of the boxes.

-Betty. -Oh, Mark.

Mark wasn't she great?

-I know we've had some trouble, but uh,

you know, it's got nothing to do with "Macbeth"?

The only bad luck Macbeth has brought you is fame.

-I know. My mother was a singer.

-Better run along. People will be waiting for you.

-Fantastic!

I mean it, I mean it, Betty. You were just fantastic.

You were great. Oh, I just love Verdi's music, I really do.

Oh, God, you were wonderful, just wonderful.

Just that damn, damn director.

I can't take him anymore, it's just...

-Julia?

You work here in the theater?

-Uh, no. Excuse me.

-Ah, you're a fan of mine.

-Yes. -The first.

-First what? -Fan.

-Congratulations. -Thank you.

-You were wonderful.

-Do you want an autograph?

-Alright, excuse me, madame.

-Oh, yeah, I'd like that. Thank you.

-Excuse me.

-What name shall I... -Excuse me.

-Allen.

-Allen? -Mm-hmm.

Thank you. -Are you a foreigner?

-Oh, no, but...

-Everything is ready, inspector.

And, they're all waiting for you.

-Okay. -So, you are a policeman,

not a fan.

-Can't a policeman be a fan? It's just...

Well I mean, I'm not an expert on opera, but...

Your voice is...

Thanks for the autograph.

-Yes?

-Hi. -Hi.

-What did the cop want? -My autograph.

Why is he here?

-Oh, who knows.

Oh, maybe because of the accident with the lights.

One of the stage hands died.

-What! -Yeah, it's pretty weird.

Oh, leave your costume there.

Mark, um -- Mark says it needs a few alterations.

-Listen, I don't want to go to the party alone,

would you feel like taking me?

Please? -Yeah, sure. Oh, I'd love to.

Oh, I almost forgot. You were great tonight.

And, um, looks like I'm the last one to congratulate you.

So, you think it'd be okay if I had a kiss?

Even if I'm only the stage manager?

What do you say?

-Did you really like me? Really?

-Like you? I loved you.

-From the great Mara Czekova.

With her best wishes.

-Thank you.

-Well, the great Mara Czekova can say

she was literally struck by the curse of Macbeth.

-Good luck, little snake.

Oh, can certainly feel her sting, there.

Looks expensive.

Oh!

-What do you think it is?

-Who knows.

Frog slime? Acid, poison?

Hey, what's wrong? What's wrong?

Oh, you idiot!

Yuck,.

Czekova, would bathe in that stuff.

-Well, it's obviously not your great grandfather's

"Phantom of the Opera", is it?

Um, one thing about this movie, though,

before we talk about it, the cinematography.

I think it defines the word "lush."

The images in this film have such a deep,

permeating color that,

seriously, I would have sex with the 35 millimeter negative.

So anyway, that is Ronnie Taylor,

the guy who ran the camera department for "Gandhi"

and won the Oscar for "Gandhi."

He also shot "Barry Lyndon" for Stanley Kubrick.

He shot "The Empire Strikes Back."

He has two other Phantom movies.

He shot "Phantom of the" Paradise.

He shot "Popcorn",

which was very popular when we had it on the show.

He had started his career in London on horror flicks.

He worked on Ken Russell's "The Devils."

Worked on "Theatre of Blood" with Vincent Price.

But at this point in his illustrious career,

what was he doing on an Argento film?

Working for a man

who's notorious for overriding the director of photography?

And the answer is that by sheer chance,

they were both hired to work on the same shoot,

which was a fancy commercial in Australia

for the Fiat Croma family sedan.

And during the four weeks that they spent together,

Argento was really impressed by Taylor's experiments

with this camera that could move in and out of a moving car

as it raced across the Australian outback,

so they developed enough of a relationship

that Argento asked Taylor to shoot "Opera".

And for the first time in his life,

Argento did not constantly overrule

the director of photography

or yell at him for taking 10 extra minutes to move a light,

and part of the reason was that Argento's English was terrible.

So Argento hired a camera operator named

Antonio Scaramuzza, mainly because he spoke English

and he could help the two men communicate,

and the whole film was shot in Super Techniscope,

often using two cameras.

Now, I never really understood Super Techniscope.

All it is, is you use a little bit more of the film stock,

you take part of the soundtrack on the film,

and you use it for a very slightly wider image.

So -- but if you have the opportunity,

I hope you are watching this movie on letterbox,

because they do get kind of a dizzy effect out of it.

Anyway, Darcy. -Yes?

-Um, let's check in on Shane and our makeup victim.

-Okay. -Hey, Shane.

Looks like you've been building a mask.

-Oh, yes.

So for the big reveal, I did a combo of

the Masque of the Red Death and Chaney's Heidi face mask.

And I think it's the best of both worlds.

-All right. Are you done?

-I haven't even started painting.

I'm getting to my weird gloopy --

This is where I'm adding my own kind of edge to this thing.

-Okay, excellent.

Will we get to rip off the mask and be horrified?

-Yes. It is going to be horrifying.

You will be able to rip it off

and glut your souls on the accursed ugliness of Spencer.

-All right.

And how's your torture victim holding up?

Spencer? How are you doing?

-Spencer can't really talk right now.

-Mm. Mmm. -All right.

Shane, we totally trust you to redefine ugly

for all future generations.

-No pressure.

-Oh, it's a tall order, but I'm at it.

-All right, before we go back to the movie,

I wanted to take note of

why Argento is using this particular opera

as his opera instead of Rigoletto,

since Rigoletto would have been a bigger middle finger

for the opera festival.

And the reason is that this play and opera

does have a reputation for bringing bad luck,

and it has had that reputation for decades,

if not centuries. And --

-Oh, do you mean -- -No, no, no, no, no, no.

-Don't say it.

I think I said it in the intro, and I didn't mean to.

We will not say the name of that opera on this show.

-Because you're superstitious. -It's been proven many times.

If you are putting on the play about the three witches

that tell this dude that he's going to be king of Scotland,

so he and his wife kill King Duncan,

and then he gets paranoid,

so he starts killing other people,

and then he kills Banquo, and Banquo comes back as a ghost,

and then the King of England declares war against him,

and then his wife goes crazy

and tries to wipe the bloodstains off her hands

while she's sleepwalking.

And then at the end, the main dude gets his head cut off.

If you're going to put on that play,

you must never say the name of that play on stage.

The traditional way

to talk about it is to say, "The Scottish play."

-Wow, you really are superstitious.

-Remember when -- you remember

when Will Smith bitch slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars?

-Yeah, of course.

-Chris Rock had just said the forbidden word on the stage

five minutes before that.

-He did not. -He did! Yeah.

He congratulated Denzel Washington on his

performance in the Scottish play.

-No way. -But he just...

He did not say, "The Scottish play."

He just went for it.

And one reason that play is cursed

is that, as Shakespeare plays go, everybody loves the play,

but it's the most expensive one to produce.

So theaters try to do it, and they go bankrupt.

And there's been lots of deaths associated with it.

In 1947, this English actor was killed on stage

during the sword fight scene.

It was a regional theater.

It wasn't the Royal Shakespeare Company or anything,

but still, you know.

But some guy committed suicide during a national broadcast

of the Scottish play at the Metropolitan Opera in 1988.

He was a frustrated, unemployed opera singer.

He jumped off the balcony during the performance.

And also, have you heard of the Astor Place riot?

-I don't think so. -Man.

In 1849, people in the audience

started arguing over who was the better actor

in the Scottish play,

the Englishman William Macready or the American Edwin Forrest,

and the American nativists

started fighting with the English traditionalists.

More than 25 people died in the street

outside the Astor Place Opera House in New York.

-Oh, my God, that's crazy.

You can take Shakespeare a little bit too seriously.

-No kidding.

Anyway, we're getting way too close to saying the name

of the play the opera is based on

that we're using in the movie "Opera".

So let's just get back to the movie.

Roll the Super Techniscope film.

And actually stuff did happen on the set of the movie.

Um, Ian Charleson, the guy who plays Marco, the director,

he said he was doing an impression of Argento

to play that role.

And Argento got upset when he said that.

Anyway, Ian Charleson was a big star at the time,

ever since the movie "Chariots of Fire."

Um, and he had a day off on the set,

and he went driving in the Italian countryside,

and he was English, so he drove on the wrong side of the road,

and he had a pretty bad crash.

Almost a head on crash.

And he got his leg broken.

-Wow.

-And he missed some days of shooting, and, you know,

because of the Scottish play.

-I feel like you're going to forget and just say it.

-No way. I'm not going to forget.

-Sometime tonight, you are absolutely going to say

the name of the play. -Never.

And in Ian Charleson's defense,

any American who has ever driven a car in England

knows this is true.

You can drive on the left side. You know, you rent the car.

You're driving on the left side.

It feels weird, and it also feels weird

that the steering wheel is on the right side,

and you can force your brain to think about

how to make a right turn against the traffic

that's coming in the left lane.

But if you ever get in a bad situation

that requires a split second decision,

what are you going to do?

You're going to jerk the car to the right

into the oncoming traffic, so I don't even try anymore.

It's too dangerous.

The English could just do the simple thing

and change the rules of the road

to the same one used in every other country of Europe!

And most countries in the world. But no.

The English know better, don't they?

-Oh, you are so going to say it.

-I want to say it. I want to say it.

As soon as the camera is off, I'm going to say it

because my brain is pulsing like that animated brain

in the movie, daring me to say it.

Why is the camera still on? I need to say it.

-They want you to say it. -No.

So the whole light grid can fall on us.

Is that why? Is that why they're still running?

-Freak you out for the rest of the night.

-They're not that cruel. They wouldn't do that.

-All right, we can pretend.

-Filthy damn birds.

-I'm sorry, I can't.

It's not your fault.

I'm a disaster in bed. I don't know why.

I'm sorry.

-According to the legend,

opera singers are incredibly horny.

No, really.

They say, they make love before they go out on stage,

and that way it sort of relaxes their voice.

You know, sweetens it up a little.

-Either I'm a lousy opera singer, or...

Have I offended you? -No.

No, I mean.

I mean, now that you're famous,

it seems like things are a little bit different between us.

-No. Don't say that. It's not true.

What a place. It looks like a museum.

-It sort of is.

I've got a rich uncle. It's his place.

Um, he's stinking rich,

and he lets me use it whenever I need it.

Want some tea? -Yes, please.

-All right, I've got rose, jasmine, or mint.

-Jasmine. -Jasmine, okay.

-No! Mint!

-Take a good look.

If you try to close your eyes,

you'll tear them apart.

So, you'll just have to watch everything.

-Betty! Why did you lock it?

Are you feeling okay?

What the hell is going on?

No, no, no.

No, no, no!

No, no, no!

♪ Love turns out ♪

♪ Smoke is in, you're living loud ♪

♪ So why don't you deny it ♪

♪ We can do it all together ♪

♪ But we can do it alone ♪

-It's not true, you're frigid.

You're a bitch in heat.

♪ I can do it Sunday night ♪

♪ Let me show you how ♪

♪ His lawyers made a law petition ♪

♪ You weren't strong ♪

♪ Burning in the night ♪

♪ It's murder ♪

-Hello?

-There's been a murder. At 66 Viale Pegaso.

-Who's speaking?

-My God. Look what success has done to you.

Come on, I'm gonna get the papers.

I want to read the reviews.

Well...

Something wrong with your eyes?

Stage lights?

-Yes, the lights. -Come on, what lights?

-Okay, it wasn't the lights.

How do you turn on the heating?

-Here, here.

-Thanks.

-How bad was it? -I can't tell you.

It was so...

I can't tell you.

-Trouble in love?

-Love? What love?

Whenever, a woman has a problem, men always presume it's love.

-Well, you know, you sopranos are famous for, um...

-Whoring around?

-Now wait a minute. Wait a minute.

-Look.

Look, I've already heard that story tonight.

Some people, think that we make love

just before going on stage, to improve the voice.

Wrong.

As far as I am concerned, anyway.

Totally wrong.

-You mean you've never made love?

-Well, of course I have.

It's just... It's never worked.

Anyway, you also work in movies.

And, you movie people are legendary, when it comes to...

It's true.

I always jerk off before I shoot a scene.

Come on. You have to talk about it, sooner or later.

-And then I ran away, and, that's when I found you.

The strangest thing about what happened tonight,

all the terrible things that I saw

are from a nightmare I used to have as a child.

I used to dream of a man wearing a black hood.

Tonight, I saw that same hood.

-You said you called the police.

-Yes. -Did you give your name?

-No.

-Told me everything?

-About what happened tonight? Yes.

-Why? There's more, right?

I'll check the other rooms.

Have you got a boyfriend?

-No.

-Someone who might get jealous?

-No. Not that I know of, why?

-There's someone in the street,

watching your windows with binoculars.

-Where? -Come and see.

Ah, he's gone.

He was there, under the street lamp.

I could stay if you want me to.

-Don't you have someone waiting for you?

-Yes.

-She's probably having a fit because you're not home yet.

I'll lock myself in, don't worry.

-Make sure you lock all the windows.

I'll look around in the street.

If I see anything suspicious, I'll phone you.

If not, I'll see you tomorrow.

What is it?

-There is someone out there. A woman and...

Who is there?

Who are you?

-Who do you think I am? I live here.

I'm one of your neighbors.

-Who was that man? Was he looking for me?

-No.

It's nothing. I told you, nothing.

-Who do you think she is?

-A neighbor, like she said.

Put the chain on. -All right.

-Don't want to lose another star.

-Who is it?

Who's there?

Who's there?

Hello?

Is that you, Mark?

Mark, is that you?

Oh, my God.

Why did I sing that role? I shouldn't have.

Shouldn't have.

It was my fault.

Why, why did I do it?

-Don't cry, Betty. Don't cry.

-Well, you can't watch that scene

with the needles taped to the eyes

without thinking about the Ludovico technique

in "A Clockwork Orange", right?

-True.

-Dario Argento said he did that because he doesn't like people

in theaters averting their eyes from scenes of violence

or burying their head in their hands.

He says he spends a lot of time on the imagery

and the gore scenes, and he wants people to watch it.

So that's partly why so much violence in an Argento film

is sudden and unexpected.

You don't have time to avoid it.

This movie has a lot of eyeballs in it,

a lot of close ups of eyes, a lot of eye injuries.

So you have to think it's about seeing things that hurt us.

Um, remember when we had the shard of wood

go through the eyeball in "Zombie"?

-Of course. Highlight of the film.

-There's something about damage

to the eyes that is more frightening than, say,

a machete to the chest or something.

-Agreed. -I can't imagine you

ever averting your eyes from gore?

I can't either.

-So a lot of people ask the question,

just how stupid is Betty?

Uh, she doesn't seem to do anything.

She just lets things happen to her.

She can't even summon the police after witnessing the brutal,

messy murder of her boyfriend,

which doesn't seem to bother her that much, by the way.

And by the way,

that was William McNamara as her boyfriend,

who became a hero recently

when he saved all the animals in the California fires.

He saved like 100 animals.

He was out there saving horses and dogs and cats.

-I know. -Every kind of animal.

William McNamara. -Whoo!

-So yeah, kudos to him.

Anyway, Betty, though, on the other hand,

unlike William McNamara,

kind of wanders around the rainy streets like a zombie.

What do you think of Betty in the movie?

-Well, she is no William McNamara.

-Okay, that actress is Cristina Marsillach,

and Argento did not like her, and she did not like him.

He considered her an entitled bitch,

and she considered him a cruel,

cold puppet master who didn't like actors.

I actually think both descriptions are

probably accurate.

Um. Argento has admitted that he does not like actors.

He doesn't give him any direction,

and the only time he talks about their performance

is when he thinks something is wrong with their performance.

He's not an "attaboy" kind of dude, you know?

And she was primarily a model,

even though she came from a famous acting family in Madrid.

She had worked opposite Tom Hanks in the movie

"Every Time We Say Goodbye",

which was a low budget Israeli film

that was a huge box office bomb.

But on set,

she kept asking Argento to discuss the psychology

of her character, and he kept putting her off,

telling her she was doing what he wanted

without having any motivation.

He wanted her to have no motivation.

Apparently, he wanted her to come across

as having no will of her own,

just being shuttled around by whatever happened to her.

And meanwhile, she was alienating the crew

and some of the other actors

because she refused to do breast nudity

in the scene we just watched with her boyfriend,

with William McNamara.

-What was she thinking?

-That's why his arms are at that awkward angle,

to cover up her breasts.

-I don't like that. -And that infuriated Argento

because she was messing up a camera shot, and she refused

to run lines with Ian Charleson or anyone else.

She said, "I don't want to be in a porno movie", so --

No idea why she wouldn't run lines, though,

with another actor.

Her father was Adolfo Marsillach,

who was a renowned actor, playwright,

theatre director back in Spain,

and so she had grown up backstage,

where she was treated very well as a girl.

And I don't think she liked getting less than star treatment

when she came to work in this movie.

The Italians don't really do star treatment,

especially Argento, who considers himself the only star.

And she wasn't Argento's first choice anyway.

When he first planned the movie,

he wanted to use a real opera singer

and shoot at the temple of opera, La Scala in Milan.

Um, La Scala is, I guess,

the most famous opera house in the world, right?

-Actually, I wouldn't say so.

-No? -No.

The Paris Opera, I think.

-Well, yeah. Okay. I mean, what show are we doing?

Oh, yeah. Right. -Yeah, exactly.

-Okay.

The most famous opera house in Italy.

But they wouldn't let him shoot there.

So he went to the Regio Theater in Parma,

where they make Parmesan cheese.

And that theater is also sort of famous.

It was built by the wife of Napoleon in the 1820s,

and it was connected to the ducal palace

so the royal personages could walk directly

to their throne boxes.

And mainly it just looks cool, as you can tell from the movie.

And then the opera singer he wanted was Cecilia Gasdia,

who was in her 20s

and was really taking the opera world by storm.

She was everywhere.

She was getting rave reviews, and she said she'd do it.

But Argento didn't like her teeth.

He thought her teeth were ugly,

and he asked her to get them fixed,

and she refused to get her teeth fixed.

So after that, he was talking to Giorgio Armani,

and Armani said, "Hey,

I was just using this girl on the runway in Milan.

Her name is Cristina Marsillach.

She's Spanish, and she's also an actress."

And so that's how she got that job.

And I think I talked about this before,

but the opera house is always the most important building in

any Italian city.

And opera doesn't mean just opera.

It's also the place

where they have circus acts and gymnastics shows

and scientific demonstrations and illusionists and displays

of what they used to call curiosities,

like two headed babies and stuff,

because they didn't have state fairs like we do

so there was no place for the two headed baby,

other than the opera house.

So anyway, let's just go back to the movie.

I want to talk about two headed babies.

Well, they also had this thing in the 19th century.

I guess it still exists,

but they don't use this word much anymore.

But they had funambulism.

Let's go to the funambulism show at the opera house.

I mean, the first three letters spell "fun".

So I would probably go. You want to guess what it is?

-Um, acrobatics? Contortionist?

-No. Tightrope walkers and slack rope walkers.

Either one can be called a funambulist.

What's harder, a slack wire or a tight wire?

-If the slack wire sags in the middle,

I think that one's harder.

-Agreed.

I've never seen a slack wire at a circus, actually.

It must have died out in the 19th century.

Today they only do the tight wire.

-I wonder why? -They're pussies.

-"Stormy reception for 'Macbeth.'"

"Brilliant debut by young singer,

who at the last moment substituted Mara Czekova."

"Revolutionary, but crazy set.

Doubts regarding the direction.

Advice to the director, go back to horror films.

Forget opera."

-Ha!

-Ha! They're pulling you to pieces.

-Well, at least it's only on paper.

-And she, a total unknown, gets nothing but praise.

-Well, she was very good.

-Last time, when they lauded Cecilia Gastilla,

and blasted your direction of "Rigoletto,"

you were very pissed off.

But not this time.

How come?

You want to take the girl to bed, don't you?

Listen, to be here with you this evening,

I took two flights and turned down a fashion show.

-Fragments of the same feathers

mixed with traces of blood,

were found on a carpet in Stefano Breading's apartment.

Who was he? Your?

-Stage manager.

-Oh yes, stage manager.

Killed, or rather, butchered last night.

Between one and two o'clock.

Who saw him last?

Hmm?

-Well, there was a first night party.

-Huh. Did he leave alone?

-I really don't know. I wasn't there.

-I see. Then who did go to the party?

Did you?

-Yes, I did. -And, what time did he leave?

-I think he left with, Betty, our singer.

-Is Betty here?

-No, but she will be soon. We have to rehearse.

So, if there's nothing else-

-I'm sorry, I'm not finished yet.

You're Maurizio, right?

The one responsible for the ravens.

-Yes.

-How many were killed? -Three.

Inspector, I think I know who killed the ravens.

-Who? -Mara Czekova, she hated them.

-No, no, no, no.

Maurizio, what are you talking about? Don't be ridiculous.

-Well, ravens are very vindictive.

They don't forget.

They remember for years and years,

and at the right moment, zap.

-Well, this production of Macbeth has been hit

by so much bad luck and so many coincidences.

It staggers the imagination.

-I don't want you to think I'm a superstitious type.

But, it's "Macbeth" that brings bad luck.

Everyone knows that.

I could tell you about dozens of strange incidents.

A lot of people seriously believe the opera to be cursed.

-I've seen a lot of your movies.

Yes, you're really an expert in this field.

I'd be very interested to know your opinion.

-I think it's unwise to use movies as guides for reality.

Don't you, inspector?

-Depends what you mean by reality.

-Excuse me, but I've got to fix this dress.

The next performance is the day after tomorrow.

And, I've only got two hands.

-Even with 10 hands

the costume will still be a pile of shit.

What?

Alright, Mr. Genius director.

I put most of the blame for what's happening,

on our fancy pants whimsical director here.

Who thinks Verdi was a twit

and Shakespeare a total asshole.

I'll fix the dress, all right.

But not for you, Mr. Freaked-out director,

for Giuseppe Verdi.

-Come on, Marion. Let's get out of here.

-All this turns you on, doesn't it?

-What are you talking about?

-You're a sadist.

-Oh, really?

-Everyone I know who knows you says the same thing.

-That must be very boring for you.

-Julia?

-Oh, just the person I wanted to see.

-What's happened to my costume?

-Look at this mess.

Someone tore it apart. -Who cold have done it?

-I don't know, someone who doesn't like the opera.

Or that asshole Mark's version of it.

This time our director O.D.'d on weird.

It isn't like the movies.

There, when you come up with something original,

everyone congratulates you.

Oh. Oh, God.

Oh, God, what a mess.

Somehow, it's got to be mended

and since they didn't call in the dress maker,

it's up to me.

I'm sorry, you'll have to try it on again once I finish.

-Mm-hmm.

Hey, we're lucky though.

Most of this junk jewelry's still intact.

-Listen, Julia, I'll be back in a minute.

-Okay.

-Mira, I must see you, I'm frantic.

-Me too. My phone hasn't stopped ringing.

Everybody wants you, everybody.

Rome, Vienna, Paris.

-Yes, that's wonderful,

but I have to talk to you about something else.

Something really serious.

There's a maniac who's after me.

I need your advice on what to do.

-I'll give it to you now, Betty.

Go to the police.

-No, I can't.

I'm in terrible trouble and, I don't know what to do.

Mira, I must see you. I must.

-Yeah, all right. I'll come by this evening.

Betty, what have you done?

-Betty? That you?

What? Wha?

It is you. Come here, look, come.

Hey, look what I found.

-What a bounkit? -It's gold.

I never sewed any real gold on this thing.

It's yours.

-No, I never saw it before.

What? How did it get on my costume?

-Don't know.

-Maybe whoever ripped up the dress dropped it.

-Give me that.

It looks like there's a date on it,

and -- and an inscription.

-A name? Let me see.

-Oh, the writing's tiny,

the letters have almost faded away.

I've got a magnifying glass, somewhere.

I'm sure I have.

Ah, it should be in -- oh, damn.

It should be here. Ah, got it.

-Any luck? -No!

Where did I see it? I'm positive I saw it.

Wait, um, it is in here.

Oh! Where is it?

What happened? Betty?

-I'm all right, don't worry.

-It's got to be in here, because I saw it in the drawer.

Hey, listen. You keep on looking here.

I'll check the ironing room.

I found it!

-I found it.

Weird choice last night, you whore.

You are perceived as an old whore.

-There's a date!

Oh! It's an anniversary I guess.

Where have you --

Oh, my God!

Here. Is this what you want?

Is this what you want?

Here, have it!

Ah, you bastard!

-No, no, no!

Oh.

It's, it's --

♪ There is no escape ♪

♪ You are slowly losing ♪

♪ There is no escape ♪

♪ There is no escape ♪

♪ I'm determined to hunt you clear ♪

♪ There is no ♪

♪ No, no, it's too late ♪

♪ It is too late ♪

♪ There is no escape ♪

♪ There is no escape ♪

♪ It's too late ♪

♪ It's too late ♪

-I can take you whenever

and wherever I want.

♪ There's no escape here ♪

♪ It's too late ♪

-Hi there. -Hi.

Let go of me.

Leave me alone.

-These marks, who did this to you?

Is this another manifestation of the curse of "Macbeth"?

Or did it happen last night?

So it did happen last night.

-Yes.

-Why didn't you tell me?

-Because it was worse than anything

I could ever have imagined.

I just wanted to forget, cancel it from my mind.

Not see anything, not feel anything.

Not think anything.

I just wanted to get away.

-I understand what you're saying.

Listen, I'm here to help you,

not to persecute you.

And, I promise,

we'll do everything we can to catch this man.

But I need your collaboration.

-I don't know what he looks like.

He ties me up, touches me.

Makes me watch,

but he never lets me see his face.

This afternoon, at the theater,

he killed Julia, the wardrobe mistress.

-Christ. I'd better get over there.

-No, please.

-Don't worry, we'll get to the bottom of this.

I'll be back.

-Don't leave me alone. I'm afraid.

-All right, calm down.

Now, go upstairs and lock yourself in.

Wait for my assistant, Daniele Soave.

-All right.

-Remember, Daniele Soave.

-Do you ever get the impression

that Dario Argento is just screwing with us?

He's putting in just enough plot to do the next gory set piece.

You know, he doesn't really care about telling

any kind of story at all.

This movie has more holes than a bisexual orgy in a gopher field.

And what's the deal with giving the women all the same name,

you know?

-Mira, Mara, Maria, Marian.

That's the opposite of what you normally do in a movie.

You give everybody a distinctive name

so you don't get them mixed up.

Is that some signal that all the women surrounding Betty

are just interchangeable victims?

-Maybe. -You know the scene with

Marco, the director, hearing all the bad reviews read to him

by the sarcastic girlfriend.

You know, go back to your horror movies.

The girlfriend is played by Antonella Vitali as Marion,

who was Argento's girlfriend in real life.

Um, Mira, the agent is played by Dario Nicolodi,

his girlfriend of 15 years

that he was no longer with when this movie was made.

So Antonella Vitali was another model

that Argento had met in Milan through Giorgio Armani.

Um, she was a horror lover,

unlike many of the actors hired for Argento's films.

And so she eagerly started a relationship with him,

and she was honored to be given the small part in the film.

And she had a sort of weird impact on the future.

She wanted to start a dress shop in Rome,

and so Argento leased a place for her,

and then when they broke up,

she was no longer interested in that shop.

So Argento turned that

into the famous Profondo Rosso horror store,

which I've never been to. -Shut up!

-But you, Darcy, spent time there, right?

-I have. Yeah.

-And so if Antonella Vitali had not wanted to sell dresses,

there would never have been the Profondo Rosso store,

where when you check out,

you usually check out with Italian director Luigi Cozzi,

who who made "Contamination", which we had on the show.

-Yeah, we did. -Wrote a number of films for

Argento and others did a lot of second unit work.

Does Luigi provide service with a smile when you go there?

-He does actually. He's very friendly.

-Okay.

-I think it's time again to check in with our own

Shane Morton, wizard of special effects,

who's creating the ugliest makeup in the history

of the world on our celebrity model,

Spencer Charnas.

Shane, you don't have much time left.

-I know. It's really down to the wire here.

But things are looking gloopy.

-Do you feel the ghost of Lon Chaney inspiring you?

-Yes, I do.

I think these stages are actually haunted.

-What about you, Spencer?

Are you feeling any supernatural vibes?

-Mm-hmm. Mm.

-Okay. I'll accept that.

We'll check back with you later.

Oh, my God. All right.

That was Coralina Cataldi-Tassoni.

Coralina Cataldi-Tassoni.

-Nailed it. -The worst name ever.

As Julia, the costume designer.

She also worked as an assistant director on the film.

But many of you will remember her from her role

as Sally in "Demons 2".

She was Italian, but she was born in New York.

She was an operatic singer herself.

Her father had small opera companies

in both New York and Rome,

and all she said about the movie was,

"I was extremely honored to get killed."

-Aw. -She loved Argento,

and she was a very good sport about that tracheotomy scene

where the the killer rips the bracelet out of her throat,

which that means at some point, Argento had to say,

"What if she accidentally swallowed the jewelry

and then the killer cuts it out of her throat

before she can digest it?"

I mean, he thinks of stuff like that.

Did the kill scene need that additional moment

of the bracelet going into the throat?

Am I missing something, Darcy?

Is there some plot point that requires

that in the movie?

-No, I just think he thought it would look cool.

And he was right.

-That's why I say he's always messing with us.

Dario Argento was born into a showbiz family.

His father was a film producer.

His mother was a glamour photographer for famous women

like Sophia Loren, Gina Lollobrigida, Anita Ekberg.

And he claims that when he was 4 years old,

the family took him to see Hamlet,

and when he saw the ghost of Hamlet's father,

he went into convulsions.

Now, like most Argento stories,

that does not seem plausible to me.

He also said, for example,

that he hated this movie so much he had to leave Rome

to avoid a nervous breakdown.

But then I've seen other interviews where he says,

"Oh, that's my favorite movie," so we'll never know.

So let's just get back to the flick.

I think Dario Argento is an acquired taste.

-Agreed.

-Uh, the Argento worship has kind of gotten out of control.

People ignore all the mistakes,

and they exaggerate the triumphs like he's the horror god.

-I feel like they do that with a lot of folks.

-Yeah, they do it with John Carpenter.

They do it with Alfred Hitchcock.

He made some lame movies.

-Horror fans, they just really want

their directors to be heroes.

-True. More than any other genre.

I know you love Wes Craven.

-I -- of course, no question.

-But in 1984, for example,

he released two movies that year, "Nightmare on Elm Street",

one of the greatest horror flicks ever made,

and "The Hills Have Eyes Part 2 ",

one of the worst horror flicks ever made,

in the same year.

-It was not that bad.

-It was that bad! -It was not that bad.

-My point is, you can have a bad day.

It's all right to say that. Film making is messy.

Film making is subject to a lot of outside forces

that can't be controlled,

but people prefer to think of it as something

that only geniuses do, especially horror geniuses.

And also a lot of those Italian films were just really cheesy.

True.

-Who is it?

-This is Daniele Soave.

Did the inspector tell you that I'd be coming?

-Yes, he did.

-Good evening. May I come in?

-Yes, of course, please.

Don't worry about me.

My eyes hurt so I put some drops in them.

-It's okay if I take a look around?

-Yeah. Go ahead.

Just give me a minute, and I'll be right with you.

-Are you nervous?

-A little. No, a lot.

-Well, I'm here now, so you can relax.

-I will, thank you. I have a great system for relaxing.

-You are feeling very calm.

Calm and relaxed.

Concentrate only on the music.

-Only on the music.

-Breathe deeply.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

-Did you call, Miss?

-No, I'm listening to a tape.

-Oh, well, if you need me.

-I'll get it.

-You expecting someone?

-Yes, a friend.

-Check who it is before opening the door.

-Of course, but I know it's her.

Is that you, Mira?

It's her.

-I read the papers, how terrible.

-And getting worse. Keep your voice down.

-Is someone here? -Yes!

Vienna and Paris!

Mira, the killer killed again this afternoon.

Julia, the wardrobe mistress. I was there.

-Now I understand why the police are keeping an eye on you.

-Who told you that? -What?

-That the police are keeping an eye on me.

-The officer downstairs, in the hall.

He asked me who I was, where I was going.

His name is, Soave.

-Daniele Soave?

-Yeah, that's right.

-But, he's in the living room.

-Who's in the living room? You're not making sense.

-Come.

-Then who is he, Betty?

-I don't know.

-He could be the maniac.

-He's gone. He was in there.

-Call the police, call the police.

-The phone's over there! I'm too scared to go in.

He may be hiding, waiting.

-Let's get out of here.

Wait, what if this one is real,

and the one downstairs is a maniac?

We'd walk right into him.

-And what if it's the other way around?

-I have no desire to find out either way.

-You're right.

I didn't even get a good look at him.

-Oh, no!

-The kitchen. It's a heavy door.

And, knives. We can defend ourselves.

I'd like to see him get in here now.

We can always scream.

You're a singer, you can scream the roof off.

-This building is ancient, the walls are three feet thick.

No one will hear a thing.

Yes?

Right. All right, right away.

-Open the door.

It's me, Daniele Soave. -Betty, he's out there!

-Come on open it, the maniac's in the apartment. Quickly!

-Why should I trust you? You could be the maniac!

-I'm a cop, damn it. I'll show you my identification.

Here, look. Can you see it?

-No, no I can't.

-Wait a second. There now you can see it.

-Anyone could get one of those, it's a fake.

-No, I'm part of the state government,

now let me in.

-No, you're fooling me. Go away, go away!

-Look, my gun. Police issued, surely that's enough.

-Hey, I've seen you before.

I know you.

No, not the gun! I want to see your face again!

-Come on, Betty.

You may as well open the door now.

One way or another, I'm coming in.

Betty!

-You bastard!

Son of a bitch!

You're not going to get me, you're not!

I'll kill you!

-You are feeling very calm.

Calm and relaxed.

Concentrate only on the music.

Breathe deeply.

One, two, three.

Four.

-Daniele Soave. So he was the policeman.

-Betty! Betty, come on. Come on.

Quickly, quickly climb up here.

Quickly, quickly come on.

-Where does this lead to?

-To my apartment.

-What are you doing in here?

-I discovered it.

It's the old air-conditioning system.

I can get to any apartment I want.

Are you angry?

-No, of course not.

-This apartment is empty.

I watch you all the time.

-Really?

-Yes, I like it when you sing.

You have a beautiful voice.

-Thank you.

-I watched that person trying

to kill you tonight.

-Why do you come up here?

-To get away when my parents fight.

- So they hit each other. - Mm-hmm.

Here we are.

-Shh.

-He's gone. You were very clever.

-You're the clever one. You saved my life.

-Alma? Alma!

-It's my mother.

-Who are you? What are you doing here?

-Oh, it's you.

-Mom, this is Betty.

-Hmm. -Do you remember me?

-No I don't remember you.

-Last night, you were outside my apartment.

Oh, right, you didn't see me.

Listen, something terrible has happened.

-Yeah, you coming in here.

Did you let her in, Alma?

-Yes, she did. -She's my friend.

-I have to call the police. -Get out of here.

-But she's my friend! -I don't care, shut up.

-Please, the phone, where's the phone?

-Get out of here! -Did you hear me? Get out!

-All right, all right, I'm going.

But you call the police!

-You're so filthy! Disgusting!

-You're disgusting, you're always naked!

-That's enough, go to your room!

-So now two more murders

that don't seem to be that frightening to anybody involved,

except us, of course.

That bullet through the peephole,

that was a work of art.

-Yes, it was.

-And to get that shot,

they had to pack some explosives to the back

of Daria Nicolodi's head.

And so she for real thought that Dario Argento, her ex,

might be trying to kill her,

and she conspired with the special effects guy

to cut the amount of explosives in half.

And then she told Ronnie Taylor on camera

that she was only going to do that once.

There would be no retakes

because if the explosive charge went in the wrong direction,

it would go into her brain.

So Rosario Prestopino, pretty well known makeup artist,

was the technician on that shot, and he did agree with her

that the explosive charge should be reduced,

but it took him five hours to prepare the shot,

and the whole time Argento was saying,

"Hurry up, you assholes," and Daria Nicolodi's

stand in thought it was so dangerous, she refused

to work on the scene at all.

So at the same time the explosive went off,

they fired a condom of blood out of that peephole

straight into her eye,

and then she had to fall back on to the floor,

no mattress, and to her left so she wouldn't hit Ronnie Taylor,

who was holding the camera.

So no wonder she only wanted to do that once.

And thank God they got the shot.

Okay, let's check in with Shane again.

Hey, Shane, you do not have any time left now.

-Correct. -All right.

I expect you to make me pass out when I see how ugly he is.

-I may be passing out, too.

-And, Spencer, I expect you to pass out

when you see how ugly you are.

-Mm. Mm-hmm.

-All right. Let's go with that.

All right, if you will recall from the first movie,

the theme of tonight's show is "what is ugly?"

And if you'll notice, these are remarkably good

looking people in this movie.

You get kind of an upper class privileged vibe from the cast,

which I suppose is appropriate for a movie set

in the opera world.

But the way Dario Argento deals with ugly is, he says,

"I, the filmmaker,

will now create an action that is very, very ugly

and you will be forced to watch it.

So well, Darcy, first of all,

you never told me what you think is ugly.

-Oh, wow. Um, I guess for me,

it truly is about your inner spirit.

Honestly, like, if you are an awful person on the inside,

then it ruins any physical attractiveness that you have.

And I'm not even kidding.

-Well, I think a lot of people would say

that that's how they feel.

But would they act that way

when confronted with a physically unattractive person?

-I think so.

A person who has good thoughts, good spirit can never be ugly.

If you have a beautiful spirit, it shines all over you.

-And you really believe that? -I really do.

-Okay, but you said the original Phantom was beautiful.

-Yes.

-And he had some pretty ugly thoughts.

I mean, he's a kidnapper. He's a killer.

-That's true.

And that is what makes him ugly, not the makeup.

-Okay, well, when Shane reveals Spencer's makeup,

we won't know whether the person has good thoughts

or bad thoughts, so it'll be a pretty good test of your theory.

So roll the movie.

I have been at meetings

where they're deciding who to cast in a show,

and they can be fairly brutal in the way

that they talk about people's looks.

-Oh, Lord, you don't got to tell me about that.

-My theory is that everybody thinks that they might be ugly.

Even people who are spectacularly good looking,

and even people who have jobs like modeling

that reward them for their looks,

they're always wondering

if something is going to make them ugly on any particular day.

-Those jobs are like the worst for that.

-It's a paradox.

-Yes.

-You know, I used to go to this dermatologist

on the Upper East Side of New York,

and I went there -- I had a morning appointment one time.

It was one of those super early appointments,

like 7:30 in the morning.

And the waiting room was full

of what most people would call beautiful women.

And I asked the dermatologist, "Hey, what's going on here?"

And she said, "Steroid shots making pimples disappear.

All these girls are working today."

-You got to do what you got to do.

-I guess so, but wow.

♪ Don't do you ♪

♪ What you can do ♪

♪ Listen to him as he calls back to you ♪

♪ Writing my music ♪

♪ Watching you die ♪

♪ Look at you just going anywhere ♪

♪ All you bad girls, lay on your back ♪

♪ What was your party ♪

♪ What was your name ♪

♪ You won't regret ♪

♪ You don't reckon him dead ♪

♪ All you bad girls, lay on your back ♪

♪ Always bad girls, staying just for you ♪

-What are you doing here?

-Mark, did you hear what happened?

-Yes, I phoned your apartment.

I spoke to a policeman.

I didn't think you'd come here.

-I just wanted to run.

Hide.

Everywhere scares me.

Except here.

I feel safe here.

I'll sleep in my dressing room.

-Oh, Betty.

There's gonna be a lot of noise.

The stage hands are working.

I've made a change in the show.

-What change?

-I don't want you to worry about it.

But I've thought of a way to identify the killer.

I don't know why I didn't think of it before.

We have an eye witness.

And, if the maniac's in the audience tomorrow night,

I will gut him.

-What if he doesn't come?

-Oh, he'll come.

-I'm so tired. I just want to sleep.

-To sleep.

Perchance to dream, huh?

Ay, there's the rub.

For in that sleep of death what dreams may come.

When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,

must give us pause.

-Is that you, Mommy?

I just had the same nightmare

that I used to have when I was a child.

But I can't decide whether it's just a dream

or the memory of something that really happened.

-What you think of it?

-Relax, everything's fine.

Don't worry, we'll get him for you.

-But when? -Any time now.

-Five, six, seven.

-Any time now. -Nine, ten, 11, 12.

13, 14, 15, 16,

17, 18, 19, 20, go!

-Now!

-Is this supposed to happen?

Is this part of the plot?

-Betty!

-Told you I'd get him tonight.

-You're a genius!

-Okay, the raven attack in the opera house

was actually based on reality.

Ravens do bear grudges against people who mistreat them,

and they do remember the faces.

So Austrian researchers have proven this.

I'm not sure whether Argento knew about

the Austrian research or not.

He may have just heard the traditional tales of vengeance

seeking ravens and crows that are told by farmers.

At any rate, the raven attack cost a lot of money,

and they had to virtually dismantle

the whole opera building in order to shoot the audience

from above and simulate the point of view of the ravens.

They built this wooden device

that they could attach the camera to,

but when they looked for a place to operate it from,

that giant chandelier was in the way.

It's actually a famous chandelier.

And so they removed the chandelier.

But that caused two additional problems.

The chandelier was too big to go through any door,

so they had to just stick it in a corner of the opera house

and put a covering over it.

Because as you saw, there were many shots

that showed the whole opera house,

and they then used a hole in the roof,

the hole where the chandelier used to be, to stay out of sight

while they were dangling the camera mount

and swooping it over the heads of the audience members.

Actually terrifying the audience because it came way too close,

came way low, and it didn't look very sturdy.

Sergio Stivaletti, the veteran effects guy for Argento,

built large wings and feet for that swooping camera,

and they also used animatronic ravens, puppet ravens,

taxidermied ravens,

motorized ravens, or actually,

when the technicians and trainers talk about this movie,

um, they call them crows.

Now, crows are smaller than ravens.

They're cheaper to use.

Uh, some guys say they used ravens for close ups and crows

for long shots, and they called them Cravens.

Hey.

-And they also used cardboard cutouts of audience members

because they couldn't afford enough extras

to totally fill the Teatro di Regio.

And that's a trick

that Argento had learned by doing a frame

by frame study of Hitchcock's "The Man Who Knew Too Much."

If you mix in the cardboard people with the real people,

you can't tell the difference in a long shot.

So anyway, they used 140 cravens

and they only recovered about 60 of them.

The rest of them continued to live in the rafters

of the Parma Opera House,

and the ones they did capture

were trucked to the Dolomite Mountains and released.

Um, so that's the meaning of those early scenes

where the killer murders a few birds.

Uh, it was the police inspector

who may look like a very attractive man,

but the Ravens will take care of his phantom makeup.

Uh, the idea is actually kind of zany.

Argento is saying that the phantom is not ugly

until his guilt is revealed.

But speaking of murder, I hope they were crows.

Because if they were,

then we have just witnessed a murder of crows

by a murder of crows.

And now, back to the left field conclusion of "Opera".

-Are you proud of that?

-Well, I've just invited a lot of mail from ornithologists.

I know. -No doubt.

What have we just witnessed, by the way?

-Well, a flock of crows,

what we would normally call a flock,

is called a murder of crows.

That's the official term for it.

So this is a murder of crows murdering.

-That's adorable.

-You know, there are always three versions

of any background story on an Argento movie.

The official version by Argento,

the gossip version by people who don't like him,

and the gossip version by people who do like him.

He calls the 15 weeks shooting this movie in Parma

the worst filming experience of his life.

Um, Vanessa Redgrave was supposed to play Mara Chekova,

the diva who gets replaced by Betty.

That was originally a much larger role,

but as soon as she got to the set, she demanded more money,

so Argento fired her.

In fact, he fired so many people on this movie

that that's how Michele Soavi ends up playing

the police officer who comes to Betty's apartment.

Michele Soavi of "Cemetery Man" fame.

We showed that movie recently.

Soave was working as an assistant director,

and he just did that because somebody got fired.

Um, Argento's father had died right at the start of filming,

and Argento was very close to his father,

so that was a tragedy associated with the movie.

He didn't like his leading lady.

He had tension with his ex-girlfriend,

who was taking a key role in the movie.

Somebody on the crew fell down a hole and cracked some ribs.

I already mentioned Ian Charleson wrecking his car

and breaking a leg.

Uh, there was a short circuit on the stage

that could have electrocuted everybody.

-Do you think it's because of the opera that they chose?

-You mean because...

-Yes, I do. -The Scottish play?

-Yes. -Do not try that again.

That was mean.

-I couldn't help it.

-It's the policeman. Extraordinary.

Why on Earth would he do it?

-Not a sound.

Don't.

-Shh.

Just like your mother.

Your voice the same as hers.

Your body, even your skin. Oh, God.

How much I loved her.

Don't, I don't want to kill you.

She taught me a cruel little game of killing and torturing.

Only then could I have her.

No.

-I was her slave.

Calm down!

-No!

-Sit down.

Shh. Calm, calm.

When he saw me leave last night,

he never thought it was a miracle, oh, yes.

Sit still!

But there was something missing.

You weren't a star like she was.

So, I had to get rid of Mara.

Betty, all I wanted was your love.

But -- but people don't understand.

And now, its all over.

How can you love me? A monster.

-No!

-I don't want you to look no more.

It's better I die.

Yes.

I want to burn, no one will ever find me.

Disappear,

no one will ever find me.

No.

Smell it?

Gasoline.

Are you afraid?

I am.

I'm afraid of pain.

Will you help me?

Here, take it.

Hold it steady.

Oh, good. Good.

Hold it. Higher.

Higher. To your left.

To your left!

Too far.

Good. Now, shoot. Shoot!

What are you waiting for?

Haven't I hurt you enough?

You want to hear more?

I strangled your mother.

She was too greedy.

She wanted more blood, more cruelty,

and she wouldn't let me touch her.

And, you know what? I enjoyed killing --

No, no!

Help!

I can't get out.

Oh, my God!

I can't get out!

Help, I can't get out!

Mark!

-Betty? Betty!

-He's dead. He's dead.

Paris means a lot to me.

We'll make this traviata unbelievable.

-How do you want to play her?

Tender? Timid?

Sensual?

-Guten tag! -Guten tag.

-Well?

-I don't think the problem exists any longer.

Ciao.

-I knew it.

-There has been a new and surprising development

in the case of, "The Crime at the Opera."

You'll no doubt remember the report

that suspected maniac killer Inspector Alan Santini

died in the fire that destroyed one wing of the theater.

Well, the police now inform us,

that the charred remains of the body,

they had presumed was Santini's,

are not in fact human at all.

-Oh, my God.

-But, those of a theatrical mannequin.

The authorities now realize that Santini planned

this imaginative, dramatic coup d'etat arte

as a delaying action to give himself time to escape.

A nation wide hunt is already underway for Santini,

who is considered to be extremely dangerous.

The police forces of neighboring countries

and in DePaul are giving their fullest cooperation.

-Betty! He's not dead!

He's alive! He's here, run!

For God sake, run! Run!

♪ Nothing's gonna hold me down ♪

♪ Now your time is up ♪

♪ Did you put up a fight ♪

♪ 'Cause I don't mean tonight ♪

♪ You leave us low ♪

♪ And why don't you deny ♪

♪ We can do this altogether ♪

♪ To get you ♪

♪ Burning aid, tonight ♪

♪ All night to fight ♪

♪ Why don't you fight ♪

-No!

No!

No.

-I am like my mother.

I realize it now.

I wanted you to win.

To kill him.

I'm exactly like her.

Come, we must get away.

Come.

Before someone finds the body, huh?

Come, let us go.

-Inspector! -Hold your fire.

Hold your fire. -Just grab him, grab him.

-Get the cuffs on him. -Get his hands behind him

-Come on.

That's it. Please, please, come on.

Lift him up with the knife.

-It's not true, I'm not like my mother!

Nothing like her, nothing at all!

Nothing at all!

-I didn't commit any crime!

I just wanted to free their souls!

-I'm gonna kill him. -Let me go!

-We've gotta get him onto the copter.

-He wanted to kill you, huh?

He wanted to kill you.

-Did you know we were coming?

-Yes, I did.

I saw your dogs running through the trees.

-Yeah, we've been on his trail now for two days.

-I saw you were talking to him.

What did you tell him to stop him from killing you?

-Nothing. A lot of nonsense.

Lies.

He's a madman, totally crazy.

I no longer wanted to see anybody.

I wanted to escape all together.

Because I'm different.

I don't even vaguely resemble others, any of them.

I like the wind, butterflies,

flowers, leaves, insects,

the rain, clouds.

Oh.

There, my beauty.

Go free.

-Wow, that ending.

Did Dario Argento turn hippie or something?

I call this the Ernie ending.

Betty learns to be one with the lizard.

Argento spent a lot of his budget

to take the whole cast and crew to Ticino in the Swiss Alps,

which is above the Gothard Pass,

because he wanted the ending to remind us

of the wholesomeness of "The Sound of Music."

You know, there, my beauty, go free.

Who says that in an Argento movie?

And then his explanation

for Inspector Santini still being alive is that all

that burned up in the fire was a mannequin.

I mean, really?

Two seconds after the place went up in flames,

he ran out and got a dummy to fool the police?

Not that the police are ever smart.

I mean, the stupidest law enforcement officials

in movie history roam through Argento films.

The films would actually be better

if the cops ever had IQs above 30.

But everybody hated that ending.

And when Orion got his first look at the movie,

they demanded that the ending be removed.

But Argento refused.

But the movie had more problems than that.

It ended up being the most butchered by censors flick

of Argento's entire career.

What do you think of the ending, Darcy?

-Uh, I don't know. It's kind of crazy.

-I know. Well, it could have been worse

because there was one version where Betty decides

that she likes Santini killing all her friends.

She is like her mother,

and they go off together into the Swiss countryside.

-It's really never that clear what she wants.

So honestly, that would not surprise me.

-So the movie premiered on December 19, 1987,

at the Cinema Adriano in Rome, which was highly appropriate

because the Adriano was originally

a neoclassical opera house, just like the one in the movie,

so they thought it was a Christmas movie.

It wasn't exactly a happy group of filmmakers, though.

Cristina Marsillach was telling the press

that she got manhandled by Urbano Barberini

as the killer in many of those scenes,

and Barberini said, "Yeah, she's right.

I'm sure she has bruises, it's film making."

Which I'm sure did not make her happy.

Um, it would turn out to be the last film, sadly,

of Ian Charleson as Marco.

Uh, when he went to the hospital after that traffic accident,

he had to confide to Argento that he had AIDS.

And this was a time

when AIDS was considered a death sentence,

and insurance companies would refuse to pay

if you used a person in the movie who had AIDS.

So Argento did the right thing. He kept a secret.

Um, Charleson was developing as a superstar at the time.

He had been in "Gandhi."

He was the star of "Chariots of Fire."

Uh, Scottish actor. Very appropriate for this play.

Don't say the title, Darcy. I'll kill you if you do.

From Edinburgh Royal High School, Edinburgh University.

But he had low income beginnings.

He put himself through

the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art

by bussing tables at the Hard Rock Cafe.

He was a great singer.

First he was a boy soprano,

then he was an adult tenor,

and he had gotten numerous rave reviews in the West End

and with the National Theatre

and the Royal Shakespeare Company.

But here's kind of a telling story about Ian Charleson.

The Olivier Theatre was producing Hamlet,

and Daniel Day-Lewis walked off the show during rehearsals.

So Ian Charleson comes in at the last minute

and just stunned the audience with his interpretation

of Shakespeare's most difficult role.

And Ian McCulloch. -Whoo!

-You know, the star of "Zombie" and many other films.

We've had him on the show.

He's been a friend of ours ever since.

Ian McCulloch says that he knew Ian Charleson,

and he was at that performance at the Olivier Theatre.

He said Ian Charleson did all the soliloquies so quietly

and with such perfect eloquence that everybody was just amazed,

especially because he was a replacement actor in the role.

But of course, all those soliloquies are about death.

And Ian Charleson was dead seven weeks after that

at the age of 40.

All right, Cristina Marsillach, Miss Spain 1980,

made very few films after this.

She was gone from the scene by the early '90s.

Um, oddly enough,

Argento made another adaptation of "Phantom of the Opera"

in 1998, with Julian Sands playing a hermit,

raised by rats in the Paris underground, and Asia Argento,

Dario's daughter, played Christine.

Everyone hated that one. Critics and public alike.

People call "Opera" Argento's last great film.

What do you think?

-Um, I'm not sure about that,

but I think because of the budget,

it was definitely his most lavish film.

But it's not my favorite one.

-No? -No.

-I agree, it's not my favorite either.

It was also his most censored film.

It was butchered in many ways, in many countries.

Never released in Germany at all

because the censor board wanted 25 minutes cut out of it.

And Argento says it was his

highest grossing film of all time.

Now he says that.

But at the time it came out,

he said it was a financial disaster.

So Argento stories, you never know

with Argento stories,

I'm not surprised that it had commercial difficulties because,

you know, all the main characters are awful.

There's nobody to root for in this movie.

Not even Betty, who learns to commune with nature

at the end.

So by the time you get to that scene,

you want to send her to some place with poisonous snakes

and feral pigs who will chew her into thousands of pieces.

How do you like nature now, bitch?

All right, standing just out of camera range, here is Shane.

I see he has arrived. Our makeup genius.

And our very own phantom,

who at the beginning of the night

was a very good looking guy.

Spencer Charnas, lead singer and founder of Ice Nine Kills.

But now it's time to witness the magic, and Shane,

you know, you're the leading authority on Lon Chaney makeup.

You are the leading authority on ghost makeup

and all kinds of makeup.

And this is the Super Bowl for you.

This is the Super Bowl of makeup.

It's the 100th anniversary of your idol,

Lon Chaney's, greatest makeup in film history.

And you have stepped up, right? Are you ready?

-Yeah. Yeah.

You've laid it on thick,

but I think we've delivered the goods.

I'm ready for it.

-All right. Because I want to see ugly.

First tell us you got a mask on here.

-Yeah, the mask is on, and it's ready to do the thing.

-All right. Is it a delicate mask?

Because can we recreate the scene

where Christine rips the mask off of Lon Chaney?

-Yeah. We can. It's going to happen.

We're going to do it.

-Okay. Darcy's going to go for it.

-Oh, wow. Really? -If I remember

she kind of, like, tentatively like puts her hands.

You know, she's thinking about it, and she --

He starts to realize that she's behind him,

and then she can't resist.

-Ah! -Oh, wow.

You look amazing.

-Darcy! -I mean, aah!

Scary.

Wow. -Whoa!

-Uh, thank you, Mr. Morton.

-Yeah.

Super Bowl winner!

-Super Bowl. -I do want to run all

the way to Atlanta. You know, that is good.

You got a lot of slime on there.

But you did some acid burn.

-Yeah, I had to throw a little bit of the acid burn

and some extra evil gloop on there.

-Okay, I don't really agree with the acid burn.

He has to be ugly from birth.

But, um -- -He was.

We just topped it off.

-You get a 99. Lon Chaney is 100. You get a 99.

-I'll take it. -Nice.

-Will it take him six hours to get this off his face?

-No, we're just going to rip it right off.

It's going to be ready to go. -You do look

like somebody knocked you off the top of the ugly tree

and you hit every branch on the way down,

so congratulations, Shane.

-Thank you. -He is beautiful.

-And Darcy thinks you're beautiful.

So you win on both counts.

-It's a silent film. Am I allowed to speak now?

-You're allowed to speak. -All right, well, thank you.

-All right. -You're welcome.

-And I'm Joe Bob Briggs, for Darcy the mail girl,

reminding you that it's not your job

to say who's hot and who's ugly.

Because that makes you so low that when you die,

you're going to have to rise up to find hell.

And the drive in will never die.

-No joke? -No joke.

There is no way to follow that.

-Wow.

-Made in Georgia.