Original subtitles

In just a few short hours, Craig Pullin

'the infamous Truckee River killer, will be put to death'

'here by lethal injection.'

'As midnight approaches, tension is palpable.'

Well, we all gotta go sometime, right?

And my time would be right about now.

Whoa!

- Yes! - Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

- Hey, where is everybody? - Whoa! Oh! Oh!

'Ouch! You'll never get me to talk!'

- 'Ouch!' - 'Squeal like a pig!'

I'm a dog who should be sent out to pasture.

- Ooh. - Hey, Craig?

Hm?

- What is this? - 'Oh, you found that.'

I was gonna give that to you. That's a wedding ring.

- I was gonna propose to you. - Oh, Craig!

Oh!

Is that a yes? It looks like a yes.

Yes...

I didn't expect. Oh!

Oh, I have bad news, too.

Um, my appeal didn't go through

so I'm getting executed at midnight.

But the thing is, there's gonna be a wedding before that.

Yay!

'Alright, people, Trudy may be a [bleep] retard'

but she's our [bleep] retard, okay?

'This is the only little bit of sunshine she's ever gonna get'

'in her whole [bleep] damn life and we don't have much time'

so we've got to make this work. Junior, what are you doin'?

We're drivin' down to the Capitol, do our best to see

if the governor'll do a stay of the execution.

- It's worth a shot. - What's the plan?

- Seduction. - Good. Good. Good. Williams.

Well, I called Chandra, told her that she needed an overhaul.

So I'm takin' her to the beauty salon.

'She's gotta use all her skills this time, okay?'

- Everything. - Garcia.

- Wedding cake. - You and me.

We're headin' up to Tahoe to get that special cake she likes.

- Done. Jones. - Oh, rollin' the roller.

- 911 calls. - 'Excellent.'

Scramble, scramble, move, move, move.

- 'Come on, let's do it.' - Where are you two goin'?

You're workin' the phones.

'We're gonna take a little pee break before we do that.'

'No pee breaks, people, no pee breaks.'

We're en route to the Caesar's Palace

Lake Tahoe, where we will contact

pastry chef Jean Pierre Valemieux.

We will pick up one special wedding cake

ordered by Trudy Wiegel.

We shall return to the Washoe State Penitentiary by midnight.

I think we'll be back before that.

- 2200. - We're gonna be great.

- We're good. - How's the forecast for Tahoe?

I don't know, but looks pretty bad. Gettin' pretty dark...

"Chance of snow showers

light to severe."

- Huh. - Okay.

It's fine down here.

- Where you got it at? - I got it at 110 right now.

110. God, it's amazing with American cars, isn't it?

- I love the Crown Vic. - American cars.

Greatest cars in the world, except for German

and, uh, Peugeots are nice, the French ones.

It's a good one, too.

Some British, those Jags can be kinda nice.

Yeah, Mini Coopers come from over there.

And obviously, the Lamborghini and the Ferrari from Italians.

Pretty good, too. Yeah.

American cars.

Seventh or eighth greatest cars in the world.

Yeah, just like our education system.

That's right.

- 'Hey, hey, hey!' - There he is.

'Freeze!'

Freeze!

I will shoot you!

Freeze!

Hold it!

Okay, you wanna run? You can run!

. Wait.

- 'He ain't in the elevator.' - Let's go back down?

Let's go back down. Down's better.

He's not, uh, not there.

. There he is!

- Well, get the car. - Get the car.

- Where are we? - Where are we?

- God. - Let's try one up.

Which level did we park?

'Which level did we park, Kimball?'

It was, like, green or turquoise.

- 'Were we on this, uh, green?' - I think maybe. Were we?

Wasn't it, it was more like a Kelly green, right?

'No, I thought it was more like a teal.'

- Uh... - Oh, no!

Sheriff's department!

What are you, what are you yelling?

- I do not see them! - Who are you yelling at?

- This is it. This is it. - 'Where? Where?'

This is it.

Kimball, come on. What's up?

'Well, let's go down!'

You [bleep] parked it, so...

Well, you were the one who said it was on here.

- Down one more. - .

Christ. Have I gotta hold your hand?

'292-13...'

Aah! Golly gee! My God!

Hi, honey.

The last bottle of ruby red fingernail polish.

Raineesha got it. Whoo!

'Hey, Rai, I'm gettin' my bikini waxed.'

'Ow! [bleep] Christ! Ow!'

It's a good thing we are here all gathered together

as it would be 'cause if you have any questions

you understand what I'm saying, about men

the world, the way things are

we can get 'em answered right here, right now in the shop.

Thank you, but I have some white friends I could ask

but thank... But that is very nice.

'Thank you.'

'They gonna do injection?'

'Yeah, they're doing injection.'

- Okay. - 'Exactly right.'

'And as far as I understand'

the liquid is a lot like the color of your shirt.

- Oh. - Yeah, it's just that...

It's some sort of death juice. I-I don't know what it is.

- Trudy? - Yeah?

- Think good thoughts. - Okay.

- It's your weddin' day, baby. - 'Oh, no, no, I'm fine.'

- Alright. - 'I'm excited.'

'That reminds me. What happened with you and Danny?'

First he tried to get me real tired.

You know, he'd wait till it'd be real late and stuff

then try, you know, try to get me real drunk or whatever.

And he was real into mouth play and I'm cool with all that

but it was, like, you know, he never got to the main event.

You know, I think he just had, you know

some kind of erectile difficulty or somethin'...

- Okay, hold up... - 'I mean.'

'It's like, it's one thing to be, like'

"Oh, I wanna pleasure you and whoo, whoo, whoo

and I'm all up in you," but it's like

"You ain't that into oral now, come on."

- Excuse me. - I really think...

- Excuse me! - No. Yes, excuse you.

Listen, I don't wanna get all bridezilla on your asses

but it's my damn wedding day

so can I please get my nails done?

I'm sorry. I'm just nervous.

Okay, I'm sorry about that.

- Sorry. - 'Okay.'

When you step up in that jailhouse...

...in your little dress...

I'm gonna be, like, "Craig, no, you didn't.

"No, you didn't chop up all those ladies

"and put their feet in a jar and put 'em in the fridge.

Mm. No, you didn't."

The next time you think about killin' somebody, what?

Think about this, my booty.

Go for it!

Oh, yes!

- Oh. This is a big garage. - Ah.

- Oh. What? - This way. This way.

Oh.

- Look. - damn it!

We were just here!

Alright. Alright.

This one. I feel it. I feel it.

'292-13, East Avenue bound.'

'She's had a verbal dispute with her neighbor.'

'Probably stop by at the neighbors at 292-11.'

Well, it's a beautiful day for an execution.

It sure is.

I know it would be a good day for a firing-squad death--

Yeah, outside or, you know

gettin' thrown off a bridge or somethin'.

Mm-hmm. Well, you know what?

If our plan works, then, uh

we're not gonna have to worry about that.

- We'll be goin' to a wedding. - I hear that.

I'm gonna say, "Listen, governor

"I know that you are a reasonable man

"I know that you are a kind man

"and I know that you believe in something

called the spirit of the law."

- Alright. - Alright?

- And if that don't work-- - Let me ask you somethin'.

- Show him your [bleep]. - Oh, I'll show him.

One might be out while I say that.

What is this, make-out point?

We're, we're on a stakeout.

No, we're on a make out. Let's do this.

Come on. Come here.

You keep this up, I'm gonna have to report you to human--

What are you reporting? I do this all the time.

I get away with it.

Well, guess what? Not anymore.

Alright? Alright, buddy? Don't [bleep] with me.

You're gay.

- 'Sheriff's department.' - 'Oh, good.'

- 'Hey.' - Hey, he's your...

He's your trouble, man. He's gone nuts.

You tangle. I-I'm out. I'm outta this.

- Okay, alright. - 'He's knocked everybody out.'

Hello. Hey.

'Why, why you beat up'

your little friends here?

- Ugh! - What?

Oh! Okay, hold on. Hold on, alright?

See, your problem is

your little behind has never been worn out.

- You've never been spanked. - 'Shut up.'

- What? Shut up? - 'Shut up.'

Well, make me. I don't shut up.

And when I look at you, I throw up. Alright? Let's go.

Yeah! Yeah, yeah.

- 'Aah!' - I got him. I got him.

- Alright. - It's alright.

- Okay. - Okay.

- Oh, he's feisty, this one. - Yeah.

- You got it? Careful. - Yeah.

- Careful, careful, careful. - Yeah.

- Careful, careful, careful, - Got it.

- Careful, careful! - I got it! I got it!

Oh, my God!

I'm havin' trouble startin' the...

Oh! How can it snow?

- I don't know. - How can it snow three feet?

- We were only in there for... - Holy...

- Hell's fury is what it is. - Oh, God.

We were in there for four hours.

I did pretty good. How'd you do?

Flopped my ass at third base

was doublin' down on threes.

'The National Weather Service...'

- Oh, hello. - Did you hear that?

'...a storm warning. As a result...'

What?

'...has closed I-80'

'from Tahoe to Reno, Nevada...'

Closed I-80?

I love your office, it's so...

...official.

So the governor will see us...

'Soon. Yeah, very.'

But your job must be stressful.

No. Well, it's fine.

Yeah, nothin', nothin' to relax a fellow like a good...

Good massage.

Back massage, you know?

- 'So relaxed.' - 'Middle of the day.'

- Workin' hard... - 'I'm just so noodley.'

- 'Afternoon delight, maybe.' - Well, yeah, oh.

'Just... yeah.'

I know that song. I know that song.

- Oh, for certain. Yeah. - 'Yeah, yeah.'

Turn up the, uh...

- Really, are you alright? - This is-- Yeah. Oh, I just...

- Are you doing fine? - She dropped her pen there.

- Yeah. - Oh, you did.

Oh, well, we have a marker right here if you need anything.

- Wow. That is nice. - Oh, okay.

Um, may I remind you--

- Here's my pen. - This is my office, so...

There it is.

You-you get... People tell you all the time...

You, uh, you look like

Well, you look like Freddie Mercury?

I do get that. Yeah.

Sometimes, boys in the back seat'll, uh

tell me that, and I'll really, uh...

I'll really give 'em twice as much as I was gonna give 'em

if you know what I'm talkin' about.

- Mm. - 'Yeah.'

- Are you on a road? - I don't know.

- All I can see is snow. - Oh, [bleep].

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Train, train, train, train, train!

Oh, [bleep].

You got us kinda buried in the snow there pretty good.

Uh, kind of come to a stop here.

Just, what you gotta do is you gotta roll it back and forth.

Now the best thing to do is flood it, gas it.

- As hard as you can. - Here we go.

Ready?

- I think we went in deeper. - Yeah, [bleep].

- Let's try to radio... - Yeah. Here we go.

Uh, Reno-11-Charlie-51, this is

uh, Lieutenant Dangle and Garcia.

Uh, we seem to be having some car trouble. We are...

- Stuck. Stuck. - Stuck.

Come back.

- Here we go. Cell phone. - Cell phone. Yeah.

- Cell phone. Ha-ha. - Come on.

I got nothin'. Son of a bitch.

- Hey, what was that? - Did you hear that?

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.

Do you think they can smell this Jell-o?

- We're offerin' you anything. - Anything.

You're lookin' at two desperate, desperate people.

We got till midnight to get this done.

We need the governor to make one phone call.

- This is, uh... - Do you believe in romance?

- 'Absolutely.' - Me too. Who doesn't?

- Really. You too? - That's right.

Best kind of romance is, uh, stolen romance. Dirty romance.

- No names, no talking, just... - Boom.

- Do it. - I need somethin' from you.

- 'Boom. Straight out the door.' - 'Yeah.'

You get balls whacked out of the park.

- And then... gone. - 'Wow.'

- Never see him again. - Yeah.

Sounds like a real fun, fun time to...

Better afternoon than you had planned, right?

- Better. Yeah. - What do we gotta do?

Um, well, here's the deal.

Um... Probably, uh, work out somethin'.

You just need a phone call. You need a phone call made.

- Right? - That's all we need.

- Like, seriously. - Mm-hmm.

- 'Can you do that?' - I, uh...

Sounds like a lot of fun. I mean, I...

- Oh. - Oh!

- Get a wow here. Wow. - There.

Phew! For a second there, I thought you was a [bleep].

Security. [bleep] Go, run.

There's a cop and a whore.

With apologies, Trudy, we have to eat the cake.

We have to eat it. We need fuel.

- Oh, come on. - Come on. Come on.

No, no, [bleep] no, no, no! . Damn it.

- No! - Oh.

- No. - Oh.

Oh. I'm gettin' a little bit like this.

. We missed the wedding anyway.

We missed the [bleep] wedding.

Taser.

- We should try that. - Taser. That's warm.

- Taser's hot. - Taser.

- Ready? - Yeah. Yeah.

- It might knock you out. - Alright.

- Be careful. - Ahh!

- Unh! - You alright?

Did it warm you up? A little bit?

- Yeah. Yeah. - I'm gonna do a light one.

Just a light one. Just for warmth. Just for warmth.

- Careful. - Ahh!

Ahh!

Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! Ho!

Ho, ho, ho! Ho.

I don't wanna die.

- You're not gonna die. - I don't wanna die.

You're not gonna die.

You're not gonna die, man.

I don't wanna die on an alternate route.

I don't wanna die.

You're not gonna die on the alternate route.

We gonna get...

Somebody is gonna come for us.

Oh, God! Whoa! What the

- What the [bleep] was that? - God. Sorry.

- What the [bleep] was that? - I'm sorry!

- What the [bleep] was that?! - I'm sorry.

- What the [bleep] was that? - Sorry.

I'm sorry! I'm sorry...

- I'm sorry. - What the [bleep] was that?!

I must've smelled the cake on you, on your lips.

- Oh, yeah. That makes sense. - Yeah.

'Craig Pullin, the infamous Truckee River killer'

will be put to death by lethal injection.

Will he receive a call for clemency

from the governor's office?

In all likelihood, no.

Craig Pullin will be only the...

...one thousand, one hundred and seventh person

put to death since the death penalty

was reinstated in 1998.

This is Maria Storm, Channel 10 news reporting.

Are you [bleep] me?

Eleven hundred and seven?

Really? That's, like, two a week.

♪ Ave ♪

♪ Ave dominus ♪

♪ Dominus tecum ♪

♪ Ave Maria ♪

♪ Ah ah ah ah ♪

Alright, come right over here

so he can get a good look at you.

'And Craig wishes... to say'

a few words before the ceremony.

Trudy, I just wanted to say

that when I think of us

I think of two lonely birds without a nest

'who found each other'

and created a nest of their own...

...made with love, trust and understanding.

And then... the State of Nevada killed one of those birds.

We are gathered here to join

this man and this woman in holy matrimony.

Do you, Craig, take this woman, Trudy

to be your lawfully wedded wife in holy matrimony

to have and to hold, till death do you part?

Yeah, that's-that's not a problem, yes.

Hmm.

'And do you, Trudy, do you take this man, Craig'

'to be your lawfully wedded husband in holy matrimony?'

Yes, I do.

Therefore I pronounce you man and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

Mm-mmm.

Yay!

Congratulations.

'Amen.'

- That was... - 'Great.'

So anyway, I guess we should do this thing now.

Hey, I'd like to go out with a laugh.

- Is that alright? - Please.

Alright. Two monkeys, two monkeys are playing chess.

One of the monkeys...

No, wait. I'm sorry. Two monkeys just finished playing chess.

And one of the monkeys says

"Hey, that's what I call castling."

No, wait. They're playing checkers.

Oh, [bleep] it. Let's just do this.

Officer Moore.

'Okay.'

♪ Oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh oh ♪

Oh, my God.