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1
00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:16,098
{\an8}My husband is an engineer.
2
00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:18,809
{\an8}'We live by the Eiffel Tower.'
3
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We live by the Eiffel Tower.
4
00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:28,902
'We have two cats.'
5
00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:32,281
We have two cats.
6
00:00:32,282 --> 00:00:34,950
'Everybody loves ham.'
7
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Everybody loves ham.
8
00:00:39,372 --> 00:00:41,290
Excuse me...
9
00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:43,417
...where is the bathroom?
10
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I have a bad stomach.
11
00:00:47,213 --> 00:00:49,465
Excuse me, waiter...
12
00:00:49,466 --> 00:00:51,508
...this glass is dirty.
13
00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:55,430
'We have two cats.'
14
00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:08,401
{\an8}Oh-ho! Ho-ho-ho-ho.
15
00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:24,876
{\an8}'Shots fired.'
16
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:26,795
{\an8}Oh-ho-ho!
17
00:01:41,976 --> 00:01:45,187
Uh, sad news, as, you, as
many of you probably know
18
00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:48,065
{\an8}Deputy Trudy Wiegel,
uh, tried to kill herself
19
00:01:48,066 --> 00:01:49,525
{\an8}'uh, the night before last.'
20
00:01:49,526 --> 00:01:50,359
{\an8}- 'She tried to do herself in.'
- Oh.
21
00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:52,569
{\an8}'No, no. She's fine.'
22
00:01:52,570 --> 00:01:54,279
They checked her out at
the hospital, and she's okay.
23
00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:56,198
{\an8}She's gonna be coming back
to work, uh, but per
24
00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:58,325
{\an8}the Sheriff's Department,
we're putting her
25
00:01:58,326 --> 00:02:01,703
{\an8}on 72-hour suicide watch,
so we'll all be taking--
26
00:02:01,704 --> 00:02:03,664
Not it! Nope.
27
00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:05,541
We're not doing not it.
I already did a board.
28
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:06,583
I didn't buy lottery--
29
00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:07,417
How come I got three times,
I got to watch
30
00:02:07,418 --> 00:02:09,545
and everybody else got two?
31
00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:11,588
Do, do want another assignment?
Is that is? Just say so.
32
00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:12,881
{\an8}- Yes. Thank you.
- 'Fine.'
33
00:02:12,882 --> 00:02:13,841
{\an8}- 'Good.'
- I'd love another assignment.
34
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:15,884
{\an8}'Garcia, you're not good
with Wiegel either'
35
00:02:15,885 --> 00:02:17,177
'so I'm putting you together.'
36
00:02:17,178 --> 00:02:20,514
Uh, Jimmy "the fist" Fitzsimmons
might be in town.
37
00:02:20,515 --> 00:02:22,182
His brother's
getting married over at
38
00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:24,142
the Desert High Motor Lodge
39
00:02:24,143 --> 00:02:26,228
and we need somebody to go
undercover to the wedding.
40
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:27,354
See if he shows up, nab him.
41
00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,898
He's wanted on
parole violations.
42
00:02:29,899 --> 00:02:31,900
Me and Garcia?
43
00:02:31,901 --> 00:02:33,068
You don't wanna sit
with Wiegel.
44
00:02:33,069 --> 00:02:35,571
You'll shoot Wiegel
within three minutes.
45
00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:38,198
{\an8}- End of story. Done. Do it.
- I wanna address something.
46
00:02:38,199 --> 00:02:40,701
{\an8}Why are we on
this side of the table
47
00:02:40,702 --> 00:02:44,204
{\an8}and Mr. Arroz Con Pollo
and, and--
48
00:02:44,205 --> 00:02:46,874
Uh, these get taken first.
49
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:47,583
'That's 'cause
we're always on time.'
50
00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:50,043
'We're here first.'
51
00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:52,045
- 'Cause it's CPT.
- 'What is CPT?'
52
00:02:52,046 --> 00:02:53,755
- This is a laugh, this is a...
- 'Laughable?'
53
00:02:53,756 --> 00:02:54,506
- What is CPT?
- 'Laughable?'
54
00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:56,592
- CPT.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
55
00:02:56,593 --> 00:02:59,386
- Tell me what is CPT, Dangle?
- 'Yeah, what is CPT?'
56
00:02:59,387 --> 00:03:00,262
Colored people's time.
It's colored people's time.
57
00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:02,598
'Oh.'
58
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:04,266
'I can't believe
you've never heard of that.'
59
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:05,893
- 'It's like famous.'
- It's like famous?
60
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:07,102
- No, I've never heard of that.
- Yeah...
61
00:03:07,103 --> 00:03:08,437
What is
colored people's time?
62
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:09,396
I feel like punching
everybody in the face.
63
00:03:09,397 --> 00:03:10,397
What does that mean?
64
00:03:10,398 --> 00:03:12,399
Everybody says it
all the time.
65
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,443
- 'Who is everybody?'
- 'I never said it.'
66
00:03:14,444 --> 00:03:15,485
People say it.
67
00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:17,613
{\an8}He's trying to say
in a nice way
68
00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:18,906
{\an8}that you should be on time.
69
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:22,492
I am, and it came out CPT.
70
00:03:22,493 --> 00:03:23,827
Just 'cause it's faster.
71
00:03:23,828 --> 00:03:26,955
I apologize. It's-it's
my problem. It's my fault.
72
00:03:26,956 --> 00:03:32,002
No, it's our fault for being
colored people and off time.
73
00:03:32,003 --> 00:03:32,961
It's our fault.
74
00:03:32,962 --> 00:03:36,506
I-I apologize, everybody,
for being colored
75
00:03:36,507 --> 00:03:39,801
and a person, and off time.
76
00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:41,762
I've got a file
in here somewhere.
77
00:03:41,763 --> 00:03:42,346
Apology accepted, Jones.
78
00:03:47,685 --> 00:03:52,481
{\an8}Wiegel's suicide attempt,
that did not surprise me.
79
00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:54,483
Uh...
80
00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:58,654
And it did not surprise me that
she failed at that attempt.
81
00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:01,782
{\an8}Mike check, mike check.
Internet predator, mike check.
82
00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,283
{\an8}Okay, we're all ready.
83
00:04:03,284 --> 00:04:04,993
{\an8}The minute he propositions me,
you come out here.
84
00:04:04,994 --> 00:04:06,161
{\an8}- Cover my back.
- 'Okay.'
85
00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:07,538
{\an8}I can't do this on my own.
86
00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:17,547
Are you, uh...
87
00:04:17,548 --> 00:04:19,800
Are you, uh, lollipop13?
88
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:22,552
Yeah. You sugardaddy69?
89
00:04:22,553 --> 00:04:23,553
I sure as heck am.
90
00:04:24,806 --> 00:04:25,555
It's nice to meet you.
91
00:04:25,556 --> 00:04:27,808
How'd you get that name?
92
00:04:27,809 --> 00:04:30,018
- Oh, uh, sugardaddy?
- Yeah.
93
00:04:30,019 --> 00:04:32,813
Well, you know, uh, I'm sweet
94
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:37,609
and, uh, I've always wanted
a little girl to call my own.
95
00:04:37,610 --> 00:04:40,362
My ex-wife and I tried,
but I'm impotent.
96
00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:41,905
- Oh, that's too bad.
- Shooting blanks.
97
00:04:41,906 --> 00:04:43,532
- Yeah, well, check this out.
- Yeah.
98
00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:45,909
Let me show you a little
something. Look at this.
99
00:04:45,910 --> 00:04:46,910
Ooh, you're gonna show me
something?
100
00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:49,371
I spilled my icee all over
the front of 'em.
101
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:52,874
Yeah, I was in the car,
and I swerved, and...
102
00:04:52,875 --> 00:04:55,043
- You want me to--
- No, no, don't touch it.
103
00:04:55,044 --> 00:04:57,671
You don't wanna rub it in
'cause it stains.
104
00:04:57,672 --> 00:04:59,589
So I'm just gonna, when
I get home, I'm gonna soak it.
105
00:04:59,590 --> 00:05:01,883
I'm telling you something
I would.
106
00:05:01,884 --> 00:05:04,386
- I spilled water on my leg.
- Oh.
107
00:05:04,387 --> 00:05:07,931
You know, I would love
to put my lips on that.
108
00:05:07,932 --> 00:05:08,598
I'd just love to have
my lips on that
109
00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:11,059
because I am so thirsty.
110
00:05:11,060 --> 00:05:12,019
I am so thirsty.
111
00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:14,730
You know what, on second
thought, I'm not gonna
112
00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:16,189
because I don't want you
to catch this--
113
00:05:16,190 --> 00:05:17,483
- That's a good idea.
- The chapped lip thing.
114
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,863
So, are we gonna
or what?
115
00:05:22,864 --> 00:05:24,406
- Freeze! Freeze!
- Go, go, go, go!
116
00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:28,076
- Get down on the ground!
- No! I'm with my child there!
117
00:05:28,077 --> 00:05:29,536
- No, no, no, no.
- Get down on the ground!
118
00:05:29,537 --> 00:05:32,748
- No, I'm not going to!
- Do not resist!
119
00:05:32,749 --> 00:05:34,583
Hey, hey, hey!
120
00:05:34,584 --> 00:05:36,501
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
121
00:05:36,502 --> 00:05:37,794
Oh, oh, ow!
122
00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:39,254
Aah!
123
00:05:39,255 --> 00:05:40,589
Stop kicking.
Stop kicking!
124
00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:44,426
Alright.
125
00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:45,636
- Alright.
- That did it.
126
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,222
- Aah!
- Stop it!
127
00:05:50,141 --> 00:05:50,766
{\an8}I don't feel I bear
any responsibility
128
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:54,436
{\an8}for Wiegel's suicide attempt.
129
00:05:54,437 --> 00:05:57,564
Uh, if you wanna look
at the flowchart of blame
130
00:05:57,565 --> 00:06:00,067
let's check out her
parents, first of all
131
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:02,903
who, uh, more than likely
just abandoned her.
132
00:06:02,904 --> 00:06:04,613
Then again, who wouldn't?
133
00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:07,324
She's like a bad casserole,
you know
134
00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:09,409
that you just wanna
forget about.
135
00:06:09,410 --> 00:06:13,663
{\an8}How about this, uh, gentleman
over my shoulder right here?
136
00:06:13,664 --> 00:06:17,334
{\an8}'Let me take a little
look-see.'
137
00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:21,129
'How is everybody doing?
Wasn't the bride beautiful?'
138
00:06:21,130 --> 00:06:24,633
'That was a lovely,
lovely wedding.'
139
00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:26,510
- 'That ain't him.'
- Uh-huh.
140
00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:28,596
You know what,
I'll just sit down then.
141
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,140
Truth be told, Garcia
142
00:06:32,141 --> 00:06:33,475
I hope he don't show up
before they serve the food
143
00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:34,518
'cause I'm starving.
144
00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:37,646
Okay. Well...
145
00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:39,648
...I hope he shows up
before I die of boredom.
146
00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:42,776
I find it hard to believe
147
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:44,444
that you are the one person
in the world
148
00:06:44,445 --> 00:06:45,654
that I don't have nothing
in common with.
149
00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:47,280
Well, it shouldn't be hard
to believe
150
00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:49,199
'cause I'm smart
and you're not.
151
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,326
You owe Raineesha an apology.
152
00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:52,369
- You owe me--
- That's a one...
153
00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:53,411
You know, I can't stand people
154
00:06:53,412 --> 00:06:55,330
that talk about themselves
in the third person.
155
00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:57,666
You're right here. Why would
you call yourself Raineesha?
156
00:06:57,667 --> 00:06:59,459
To remind yourself
you're alive or something?
157
00:06:59,460 --> 00:07:01,044
'Cause when I get up
from this table
158
00:07:01,045 --> 00:07:04,047
and whup your natural behind
right here, at this thing
159
00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:05,215
you will know who did it.
160
00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:07,300
There won't be no doubt
in your mind.
161
00:07:07,301 --> 00:07:09,136
You won't be able to say,
"It looked like Raineesha."
162
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,887
No, because it was
sure enough Raineesha.
163
00:07:10,888 --> 00:07:12,222
I wanna just take a fork
164
00:07:12,223 --> 00:07:14,224
and just stick it in my neck
in a second here.
165
00:07:14,225 --> 00:07:16,560
Well, here, honey,
here's a clean one.
166
00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:17,811
- Oops.
- No, don't, oh, no...
167
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:19,688
Don't put cake on me.
I don't like that.
168
00:07:19,689 --> 00:07:20,564
'Now, let's bring this thing
to the bar.'
169
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,858
'Drinks are on
the groom's family.
170
00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:24,901
'Let's go!'
171
00:07:24,902 --> 00:07:27,863
Alrighty then.
Now we gotta go to the bar.
172
00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:29,782
Lord, I hate my life.
173
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:37,790
Hi, mom.
174
00:07:39,834 --> 00:07:41,251
How are you?
175
00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:44,212
{\an8}I suppose you know, um...
176
00:07:44,213 --> 00:07:47,300
{\an8}...everybody at the station
thinks I tried to kill myself.
177
00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:07,445
I know. I know.
178
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:11,406
Yeah.
179
00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:12,908
It was just a
little misunderstanding
180
00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:15,452
but, uh, what are you gonna do?
181
00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,537
Oops.
182
00:08:17,538 --> 00:08:19,165
They've never been nicer to me.
183
00:08:33,095 --> 00:08:33,721
Hi, Trudy. Oh.
184
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,724
- Oh, hi, Jim.
- Hi.
185
00:08:37,725 --> 00:08:39,100
How you holding up?
186
00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:43,605
You know, I'm okay,
considering I just tried
187
00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:45,273
to commit suicide recently
188
00:08:45,274 --> 00:08:46,733
but other than that,
I'm pretty good.
189
00:08:46,734 --> 00:08:48,944
- That's for you.
- I'm gonna sit...
190
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:51,196
I think I'll sit it right
over there. I don't want it.
191
00:08:51,197 --> 00:08:53,616
Knock, knock, knock.
Someone came to see you.
192
00:08:57,954 --> 00:08:58,829
Surprise.
193
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:01,707
He doesn't bite. He's dead.
194
00:09:02,875 --> 00:09:06,711
You know, that's...
Okay, okay.
195
00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:07,837
Okay.
196
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:13,301
Okay, let it all out.
Let it all...
197
00:09:13,302 --> 00:09:14,970
Okay, okay, okay.
198
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:17,806
Okay... corral.
199
00:09:17,807 --> 00:09:19,683
Everything's okay
at the OK Corral.
200
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,226
You don't want me
to touch you.
201
00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:23,103
- 'It's not that I don't--'
- You know what I should do?
202
00:09:23,104 --> 00:09:24,145
{\an8}I don't even know
what I was thinking.
203
00:09:24,146 --> 00:09:26,982
{\an8}- I should go drown myself.
- No, no, no, no.
204
00:09:26,983 --> 00:09:27,983
No one's gonna go
drown themselves
205
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:31,361
because we're having
such a good time as friends
206
00:09:31,362 --> 00:09:34,781
and I appreciate you
being alive so much.
207
00:09:34,782 --> 00:09:37,118
You wanna spoon?
208
00:09:42,915 --> 00:09:43,873
Little spoons
in the spoon drawer.
209
00:09:43,874 --> 00:09:47,335
What does the first spoon say?
210
00:09:47,336 --> 00:09:51,631
The first spoon says, uh...
211
00:09:51,632 --> 00:09:53,842
"...I'm glad you didn't
kill yourself, second spoon."
212
00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:56,011
And, um...
213
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:58,513
The second spoon says...
214
00:09:58,514 --> 00:10:01,016
♪ I'm a little teaspoon ♪
215
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:03,351
♪ Don't mind me ♪
216
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:06,354
♪ I'll just be here spooning ♪
217
00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:08,898
♪ Waiting for the tea ♪
218
00:10:08,899 --> 00:10:10,734
That's a wonderful thing
219
00:10:10,735 --> 00:10:12,694
for the other spoon to say
to the first spoon
220
00:10:12,695 --> 00:10:16,823
in our little spoon drawer.
221
00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:25,373
{\an8}Fun wedding, huh?
222
00:10:25,374 --> 00:10:27,834
{\an8}Weddings are kind of nice.
223
00:10:27,835 --> 00:10:29,878
{\an8}I hate weddings.
224
00:10:29,879 --> 00:10:31,588
You sit up there
225
00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:33,715
look at these two people
who you know...
226
00:10:33,716 --> 00:10:36,593
You can look at 'em and tell
it ain't gonna work.
227
00:10:36,594 --> 00:10:38,928
Well, yeah,
I guess there's that.
228
00:10:38,929 --> 00:10:40,722
Sometimes love conquers all.
229
00:10:40,723 --> 00:10:41,931
Mmm, and sometimes it don't.
230
00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:43,892
I guess that's a weird thing
231
00:10:43,893 --> 00:10:46,561
we're both not hooked up
now, so...
232
00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:48,105
You were married,
I was married.
233
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:50,899
That's something in common.
234
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:52,859
There... Well, there you go.
Hot-hot darn.
235
00:10:52,860 --> 00:10:54,903
I'll tell you what, uh
236
00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:57,072
I don't think we're having
much luck with our guy here.
237
00:10:57,073 --> 00:11:00,867
We are looking a bit conspicuous
just sitting here, so...
238
00:11:00,868 --> 00:11:02,911
I look cute.
You look conspicuous.
239
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,913
Well, maybe,
well, thank you.
240
00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:06,748
Maybe it would be less so
if we just stepped out
241
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:10,085
on, uh, there in, uh,
the dance floor there.
242
00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:12,587
Like this.
Then you go like that.
243
00:11:12,588 --> 00:11:13,922
- Okay.
- Okay?
244
00:11:13,923 --> 00:11:16,925
Oh, I don't know. Okay.
245
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,635
Alright.
I'm gonna get in there.
246
00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:22,389
{\an8}I think that she may have, uh...
247
00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,933
{\an8}She may be divorced in the past.
248
00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:26,267
{\an8}- Wiegel?
- And she don't tell nobody.
249
00:11:26,268 --> 00:11:26,935
{\an8}You think that someone married
Wiegel at some point?
250
00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:28,812
{\an8}I do, I do.
251
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,605
{\an8}You think there was
a guy out there
252
00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:33,817
{\an8}desperate and crazy enough
253
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:36,903
{\an8}to buy a ticket
for that boat ride?
254
00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:38,405
I think so.
255
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:39,781
There's a lot of desperate,
crazy people out there.
256
00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:42,409
I think so, I mean, no matter
how, uh, bad the carnival ride
257
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:43,743
there's always some son--
258
00:11:43,744 --> 00:11:45,620
Always some son of a bitch
who wants to line it?
259
00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:46,955
You're absolutely right.
Absolutely right.
260
00:11:46,956 --> 00:11:49,124
Hey, look at all those guys
are puking on this ride.
261
00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:50,959
Me next, you know.
Hey, well, I got a ticket.
262
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,503
- I'm gonna line up.
- You got a ticket. Yeah.
263
00:11:55,339 --> 00:11:57,674
{\an8}Is this wrapped up real tight?
264
00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:59,843
{\an8}Go back from the very beginning
and just tell us--
265
00:11:59,844 --> 00:12:03,430
{\an8}I wanna make sure. You gotta
wear your seat belt, you know?
266
00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:06,683
{\an8}I was at the bar
having my show drink.
267
00:12:06,684 --> 00:12:08,810
- We get one free drink.
- Okay.
268
00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:11,020
- For showing up for work.
- 'Show drink.'
269
00:12:11,021 --> 00:12:13,189
- Yeah.
- A showing-up drink. Okay.
270
00:12:13,190 --> 00:12:14,315
Loosen you up
a little bit.
271
00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:15,150
- I'm getting loose.
- Uh-huh. Right.
272
00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:19,279
And, and all of a sudden,
I see this guy
273
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,698
and he's getting real close
to the stage.
274
00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:24,200
You're not supposed to get real
close to the stage
275
00:12:24,201 --> 00:12:28,122
and he was, you know, trying
to get a peek at her [bleep].
276
00:12:29,623 --> 00:12:31,875
But we don't show,
and she was, you know
277
00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:36,087
she was dancing,
and he was, he started to
278
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:40,467
he started yelling,
"Show me the [bleep]!"
279
00:12:40,468 --> 00:12:43,470
Which is a slang term
for [bleep].
280
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:44,846
- Yeah, we...
- Right.
281
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,598
- Right.
- Which is also a slang.
282
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:48,516
- They use it on the streets.
- Yeah.
283
00:12:48,517 --> 00:12:51,686
And then all of a sudden,
he opened his jacket
284
00:12:51,687 --> 00:12:55,023
like Arnold Schwarzenegger
or something like that
285
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:56,816
and he pulled out a gun.
286
00:12:56,817 --> 00:12:58,067
{\an8}This fella who shot your friend,
is it, it's look-see--
287
00:12:58,068 --> 00:13:01,321
Yeah, that's look-see.
288
00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:02,947
She has a lazy eye.
289
00:13:02,948 --> 00:13:07,035
{\an8}We never know where she looks,
and so we just call--
290
00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:09,746
- So you call her look-see.
- You call her look-see, right?
291
00:13:09,747 --> 00:13:11,206
- Alright, look-see.
- Look-see, I get it.
292
00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:15,543
Hey, hey, could I have a ride
home, if you don't mind?
293
00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:16,711
I mean, if you're going my way.
294
00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:20,340
I don't wanna, I don't wanna put
you guys out or anything.
295
00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:22,175
'Oh, no, uh, we--'
296
00:13:22,176 --> 00:13:26,471
Hey, fellas, you think you could
give Bucky here a ride maybe?
297
00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:27,347
Just, just, uh, not too far.
298
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:29,390
You're not in a rush, obviously.
I mean--
299
00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:32,185
- She's already, uh--
- Yeah, shot in the face.
300
00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:34,062
So, Bucky,
you've been a real big help.
301
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:35,730
Hey, come back, would ya?
302
00:13:35,731 --> 00:13:37,732
Well, I hope we don't,
but, uh, I'm sorry--
303
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:39,777
{\an8}I'll show you the [bleep].
304
00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:47,116
Yeah.
305
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,585
{\an8}Trying to train him
to find drugs.
306
00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:58,711
{\an8}Right now,
he does not find drugs.
307
00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:03,091
{\an8}Right now, he'll, uh, he'll find
Sloppy Joes, but, uh...
308
00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:06,135
{\an8}...no real practical purpose
for that. The, uh...
309
00:14:06,136 --> 00:14:07,762
What I'm trying to do
is I'm trying
310
00:14:07,763 --> 00:14:10,431
to train him to find drugs by
I'm doing a mix.
311
00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:13,560
It started with, uh,
80% Sloppy Joe
312
00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:15,728
and 20% marijuana
313
00:14:15,729 --> 00:14:18,773
uh, and gradually adding
marijuana to the mix.
314
00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:20,984
Now we're at about,
uh, 60% marijuana
315
00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:23,653
40% Sloppy Joe.
316
00:14:23,654 --> 00:14:25,280
He'll find those.
317
00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:28,408
And, uh, goddamn,
Sloppy Joes are real good.
318
00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:29,826
Watch this.
319
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,662
Find the Sloppy Joe!
Find the Sloppy Joe!
320
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:36,916
'Yeah. Yeah.'
321
00:14:36,917 --> 00:14:38,459
Yeah. Good boy.
322
00:14:38,460 --> 00:14:39,127
No, no, no.
Don't eat it. Don't eat it.
323
00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:41,004
No, no, no, no, no, no.
324
00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:45,800
Good boy. Good boy. Good boy.
325
00:14:45,801 --> 00:14:47,093
It [bleep] this dog up, man.
326
00:14:47,094 --> 00:14:50,847
He eats it and lays on
the ground, humps the air.
327
00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:52,557
That's all he can do.
328
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:53,975
Good boy. Good boy.
329
00:14:53,976 --> 00:14:57,396
{\an8}Look, Wiegel,
I gotta tell you something.
330
00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:03,777
{\an8}Suicide is a permanent solution
to a temporary problem.
331
00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:07,280
I don't want you to ever...
332
00:15:07,281 --> 00:15:11,159
I felt so bad
when I heard what happened.
333
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,994
And I know you and I...
334
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:14,954
You know,
I'm kidding around with you.
335
00:15:14,955 --> 00:15:18,166
You know, I like to just kind of
jerk your chain a little bit
336
00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:23,046
but when I make fun of you
or tease you, I'm just kidding.
337
00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:24,172
That's just my way.
338
00:15:24,173 --> 00:15:27,467
I only do that with people
that I like.
339
00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:28,718
Well, I don't want you to take
it personally
340
00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:31,679
but I did try and kill myself
because you made me feel bad.
341
00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:33,349
Oh, [bleep].
342
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:41,981
{\an8}Well, I may not be Nostradamus
343
00:15:41,982 --> 00:15:45,026
but I bet
my closetful of shoes
344
00:15:45,027 --> 00:15:46,527
that our buddy ain't gonna
show up tonight.
345
00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:51,074
That is the first thing you done
got right all night, Garcia.
346
00:15:51,075 --> 00:15:53,493
You know, it's been
a long night too.
347
00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:56,704
We're just sitting here, wasting
time, and eating stupid cake.
348
00:15:56,705 --> 00:16:01,376
Oh, Garcia, Garcia!
Why are you still complaining?
349
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:02,919
You ain't complained all night.
350
00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:04,420
You ain't got free dinner
351
00:16:04,421 --> 00:16:07,215
you ain't got a dance lesson,
free drinks.
352
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:08,801
Mmph!
353
00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:12,845
Alright, amen. Amen.
You know what? You're right.
354
00:16:12,846 --> 00:16:14,222
- Thank you.
- You're right, okay?
355
00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:17,850
And when a woman's right,
a woman's right.
356
00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:20,228
Here, and I don't appreciate
what I got sometimes.
357
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,105
Garcia, shut up and kiss me.
358
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:39,997
{\an8}'Reno,
this is 17-Charlie-12'
359
00:16:39,998 --> 00:16:42,250
{\an8}here on Bernard way
at the, uh, hobby store.
360
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:46,921
{\an8}I got a B&E in progress,
and I need backup right away.
361
00:16:46,922 --> 00:16:47,922
{\an8}I'll take the...
362
00:16:47,923 --> 00:16:49,257
{\an8}The three musketeers.
363
00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:51,134
{\an8}Is that necessary?
364
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:53,928
{\an8}Do we really need
a shotgun right now?
365
00:16:53,929 --> 00:16:55,304
Where did you get that,
Wiegel?
366
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:57,640
It was in the back seat,
and I just wanna hold it.
367
00:16:57,641 --> 00:17:00,101
Just hold it,
and just be quiet, okay?
368
00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:01,102
Okay.
369
00:17:01,103 --> 00:17:02,228
'Sheriff's Department.'
370
00:17:02,229 --> 00:17:04,897
Oh, my God! Look at this place!
371
00:17:04,898 --> 00:17:05,898
Shut up!
372
00:17:07,776 --> 00:17:09,444
Look at this place.
373
00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:13,573
It's like a craft... place.
374
00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:17,118
- Wiegel, be quiet.
- I am being quiet.
375
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,078
I was just marveling
at the beauty.
376
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:21,622
You're my best friend.
You're my very best friend.
377
00:17:21,623 --> 00:17:23,124
- Thank you.
- Okay?
378
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,960
We'll make crafts later if
you help us catch the burglar.
379
00:17:25,961 --> 00:17:28,213
{\an8}Cloisonne
for copper enameling!
380
00:17:31,925 --> 00:17:34,135
'Shit! Wiegel!'
381
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:36,304
That fell. Jonesy!
382
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:37,388
- What?
- Decoupage glue.
383
00:17:37,389 --> 00:17:41,434
{\an8}They have the glue and the
sealer and the matte finish.
384
00:17:41,435 --> 00:17:43,187
Decoupage... Come here.
385
00:17:45,272 --> 00:17:48,274
Decoupage is something
that you do
386
00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:49,942
and you trim around it
and lay it--
387
00:17:49,943 --> 00:17:51,611
Are we in kindergarten?
388
00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:53,196
Okay, then maybe I'll just
go blow my brains out
389
00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:54,655
on the front lawn then?
390
00:17:54,656 --> 00:17:56,783
No, no, no. You're not blowing
your brains out, okay?
391
00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:58,493
Just calm down.
392
00:17:58,494 --> 00:17:59,286
Read about it, and...
393
00:18:03,290 --> 00:18:06,334
Plastic pearls!
394
00:18:06,335 --> 00:18:09,545
- What?
- 'Lady, I give up.'
395
00:18:09,546 --> 00:18:11,672
I give up. Sorry.
I didn't mean to break in.
396
00:18:12,382 --> 00:18:15,635
- 'Wiegel!'
- 'Wiegel!'
397
00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:16,344
I did it!
398
00:18:16,345 --> 00:18:19,013
I did something!
399
00:18:19,014 --> 00:18:20,640
Aah!
400
00:18:20,641 --> 00:18:21,224
- 'I shot him!'
- Ow!
401
00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:23,810
Oh!
402
00:18:23,811 --> 00:18:25,228
- Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
- Okay, okay.
403
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:27,146
- 'She shot him.'
- Hey! Enough.
404
00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:28,189
I'm gonna need
an ambulance here
405
00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:29,482
at the, uh, at the,
at the hobby store
406
00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:30,901
here on Bernard way.
407
00:18:37,115 --> 00:18:38,866
{\an8}There's always rumors
going around
408
00:18:38,867 --> 00:18:42,329
{\an8}and it's perfectly natural
for people to hook up, and...
409
00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:49,544
I hear I'm not top dog anymore,
Garcia... which is fine.
410
00:18:49,545 --> 00:18:50,419
- I didn't know I had--
- Fine with me.
411
00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:54,048
I didn't know
I had a list of dogs.
412
00:18:54,049 --> 00:18:58,386
{\an8}Four, three, two, one.
413
00:18:58,387 --> 00:18:59,428
{\an8}- Happy life!
- Sure.
414
00:18:59,429 --> 00:19:01,222
I mean, who would have thought
that a suicide attempt
415
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:05,101
could actually turn out to be
something great for everybody?
416
00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:07,436
Best thing that's ever happened.
417
00:19:07,437 --> 00:19:10,022
- The best thing.
- Ohh, me too.
418
00:19:10,023 --> 00:19:11,399
Trudy needs another beer.
419
00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:14,402
I got it. I got it.
420
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:15,361
Watch out. That's a depressant.
421
00:19:18,657 --> 00:19:21,075
Seriously, seriously,
we love you, sweetheart.
422
00:19:21,076 --> 00:19:21,576
We love you very, very much.
423
00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:23,786
And I love you guys.
424
00:19:23,787 --> 00:19:26,581
And I just want to
tell you straight up
425
00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:28,583
it was a misunderstanding
426
00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:31,670
and I didn't try
to kill myself.
427
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,471
Alright, alright.
428
00:19:42,472 --> 00:19:45,851
{\an8}Tall, cold one
for the tall, hot one.
429
00:19:48,812 --> 00:19:51,606
What? What happened?
430
00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:54,942
You're mad.
431
00:19:54,943 --> 00:19:57,654
Maybe I will [bleep] go try
and kill myself now then.
432
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,532
You're all disappointed that
I didn't try to kill myself.
433
00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,869
Wow!
434
00:20:05,329 --> 00:20:07,163
I'll make you happy this time.
435
00:20:07,164 --> 00:20:10,875
I'm gonna go jump
in the [bleep] ocean!
436
00:20:10,876 --> 00:20:13,294
you, [bleep] suckers!
437
00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:15,964
'[bleep] you!'
438
00:20:17,132 --> 00:20:19,300
'[bleep] you, okay?
you.'
439
00:20:19,301 --> 00:20:21,469
you!
440
00:20:21,470 --> 00:20:22,428
I'm going to the ocean!
441
00:20:22,429 --> 00:20:25,097
What did I miss?
442
00:20:25,098 --> 00:20:27,850
She can't find her way
to the ocean.
443
00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:28,518
She can't find her way
to her car.
444
00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:44,158
Bon vivant's not what
I'm looking for. What's a bon...
445
00:20:44,159 --> 00:20:45,284
- Like a--
- 'Boner?'
446
00:20:45,285 --> 00:20:46,369
- No.
- 'No, a good cup.'
447
00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:48,996
- 'I meant bone chef.'
- Don't do that.
448
00:20:48,997 --> 00:20:50,164
- What's Arroz Con Pollo?
- I don't like that.
449
00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:52,333
- Arroz con pollo is--
- 'Chicken with rice.'
450
00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:54,710
Why didn't you just say
chicken with rice?
451
00:20:54,711 --> 00:20:56,003
Because that's not
what it's called
452
00:20:56,004 --> 00:20:58,506
because it wasn't invented
in America, okay?
453
00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:00,091
It was invented by the Spanish.
454
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:02,843
Are you saying that Hispanics
developed chicken?
455
00:21:02,844 --> 00:21:04,845
No, sir.
They put those two together.
456
00:21:04,846 --> 00:21:06,514
The French discovered,
the French discovered chicken.
457
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:08,057
- And rice is Chinese.
- 'Yes.'
458
00:21:08,058 --> 00:21:09,517
Rice with chicken.
459
00:21:09,518 --> 00:21:10,977
Shut with up.
460
00:21:10,978 --> 00:21:11,853
How about it?
34305
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