All language subtitles for Episode 56º Patreon Fails (Part 1)

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Original subtitles

Hello friends, how are you?

How are things going?

Welcome to a new video.

In today's video I want to talk to

you about something that I have not done

so far and surely that more than one

who is interested would laugh at least listening

to this.

And what I want to talk about today

is about fails, about mistakes that I have

made as a photographer throughout my professional career,

both in workshops that I have taught or

in conferences and of course weddings.

I would like you not to share this

because you are going to see the most

human side of me.

Erika always says that I am very careless.

I don't think so, but you will draw

conclusions, okay?

Well, first of all, to put you in

the background, I want to tell you about

a workshop that I taught three years ago

in Italy.

And well, this workshop or this conference was

organized by a photographer named Federica Mari, who,

in addition to being a good photographer, is

a very good person and from here I

want to greet her.

And well, she invited me to go there

to teach both a workshop and a conference

or a speech, okay?

In short, I had planned, in theory, to

leave with the plane from Barcelona on Thursday,

okay?

As every Monday, Erika always reminds me of

the things I have to do, for example,

during the week.

In short, I remember that Monday she told

me, I have scheduled that you fly to

Italy on Thursday for a conference.

And I said, no, no, no, no, it's

Friday.

And she says to me, are you sure?

And I say, yes, man, of course, completely.

It's Friday because I have to do this

and I'll meet with ...

Yes, yes, yes, I mean, it's totally safe

on Friday.

Aha, I have scheduled for Thursday.

I say no.

On Thursday, it arrives on Thursday, I was

in the center of the city of Zaragoza,

I went to buy a pair of shirts

for the conference, to go a little handsome,

and suddenly, when I was going with the

scooter, I notice that my phone vibrates, with

which I stop for a second, I see

the phone, which is an Italian number, and

I take the phone, right?

And they tell me where I am, and

I tell them who he is, and he

tells me, well, that he is Federica, and

that he is waiting for me at the

Fiumicino airport, at the Roma airport, and he

is waiting for me in the exit area,

and he doesn't see me.

I quickly tell him, wait, wait, Federica, I

mean, I hang up, I call Erika running,

and I tell her, Erika, when is the

next plane from Barcelona?

And she tells me, and then, super angry,

I told you, I told you, you had

to fly today!

And I say, now there is no time

for this, I say, please tell me when

the next plane is, turn on the computer

and tell me, so that, at the same

time, he tells me, look, you have the

last one at 10.30 pm from Barcelona

to Roma, and I say, well, buy it,

and Erika tells me, the price is not

very cheap, huh?

And I say, buy it.

So, I call Federica, and I tell her

a pitiful lie, and I tell her that

I have lost the plane, but that I

get on the next plane, the one at

10.30 pm, so I would get to

Rome at 12.30 pm, almost one in

the morning, right?

And I tell her that there would be

someone waiting for me at the airport, and

Federica tells me, no, Victor, impossible, we have

to leave now, and in fact, we were

leaving with you because I have to meet

with the brands, with the suppliers, I have

to receive students, and I say, and then

how do I go?

From the airport to the workshop, and Federica

tells me, well, she could leave you a

taxi ready for when you arrive, that she

picks you up and takes you to the

place, but you are going to pay for

the taxi, and of course, I said yes,

yes, Federica, it is my mistake, I have

to pay for it, that is, I arrive

at 12.30 pm, I take the suitcase,

the taxi waits for me, three hours driving

to the place, because I was not in

Rome at the workshop, three hours driving the

taxi driver, we arrive, and I say to

myself, this champion taxi driver is going to

hit me a lot, total, I tell the

taxi driver how much it is, and he

tells me, 350 euros.

Between the plane and the taxi, I said

that Federica paid me well, right?

But the thing is that I stayed, and

well, in addition to the quarrel that was

about the championship.

Well, let's change thirds now, and I'm going

to talk to you about a wedding, about

an error or a serious mistake that I

made during a wedding, okay?

Let's see how I tell it.

We were hired by a couple thanks to

a wedding planner, that wedding planner can be

said to be one of the most recognized

in Spain, okay?

And he tells us that he has a

couple who is interested in our services, and

that we do have a free one.

Of course, the wedding ends up being hired,

everything is fine, he stays there, and we

make the call by Skype also with the

couple, everything works perfectly, and suddenly, a few

months later, the wedding planner calls me and

tells me that the couple has discussed with

the wedding planner, with which he no longer

works for them, that is, the wedding planner

disappears.

At that time, I did not know who

the couple was at all.

Because the wedding planner, who was the daughter

of the executive director of one of the

main banks in Spain, had not yet explained

it to me.

Nothing more and nothing less.

In short, the wedding planner tells us that

he is leaving work, but the couple calls

us to say that they would love to

continue counting on us, us, perfect, okay?

The week before the wedding, we met with

the bride, which we had not done so

recently, and we started talking.

I feel, and I have a sixth sense,

that at that wedding that we are going

to photograph, there will be important people.

I don't know why.

In short, I was about to ask him,

is there anyone you should know who is

going to attend your wedding and that I

should know?

I don't know if I said it ...

No, sorry, I just thought about it.

I was about to ask him and I

should have done it, but at that moment

I thought it could be pedantic on my

part to ask him that, that if at

his wedding there would be someone that I

should know.

Because it is true that despite the fact

that in the contract we could, that is,

it said that we could publish all the

photos we wanted, on the other hand I

believed that that wedding was preparing something big,

as it was.

In short, the day of the wedding arrives,

on the coast, Erika is going to make

the boyfriend and I am going to make

the girlfriend, that is, to do all the

preparations.

I arrive, the father of the bride opens

the door for me, as soon as I

enter I see a really beautiful house, everything

very well, everything done with a lot of

charm, and as soon as I enter the

house I quickly see that next to the

door there is a photo of the father

with Elton John, and a little further from

the father of the bride with Sting, and

a little next to him the father of

the bride with a super well-known politician

from Spain.

And I think, damn it, if this man

...

I keep taking the photos and in the

end the man, who is, well, very cordial,

asked me things about photography and such, and

I understood, or I thought, that he was

still related to the press.

In fact, there comes the shit, that I

ask him, hey, what do you do for

a living?

To an executive director of one of the

main banks in my country, like that.

Hey, what do you do for a living?

The man starts laughing and doesn't tell me

anything.

I keep shooting and then, when I already

hear what the father's name was, I go

to the bathroom, I google it and I

write the name of the couple, of the

bride, to know a fucking time in which

house I was, damn it.

And I say, okay, well, it's the executive

director, I say, perfect, I just fucked it

up completely, I finally find out what kind

of wedding I'm in.

We finish preparations, we go to the ceremony,

100 meters before entering or arriving at the

church square, I tell the driver, I say,

please, stop for a second here, I'm going

to run to wait for the father to

arrive with the bride, to capture, come on,

just that moment of the car.

They stop me, I'm running, I turn the

corner and I start seeing cars, armored cars

and all with tinted windows.

And I think, man, where the hell am

I?

And I run, everything full of security guards,

so I get to the door of the

church, to which I leave my backpack, to

leave it and to take the camera or

whatever I took, I start hearing people screaming

because there was an audience in the square.

In other words, everyone knew what wedding they

were going to, except the photographer, which was

me.

Anyway, I turn the camera, well, when I

was there, I hear screaming, as I tell

you, I turn around and see the president

of the government.

The first thing I do, I start shooting,

the president of the government enters, at the

moment the president of Real Madrid enters and

at the moment the president of FC Barcelona.

And I hallucinate and Erika comes out and

says, well, what?

And we have not realized where we were

photographing and I say, hello kid.

We found out, the last of all, where

we were.

It is clear that he had to have

told the bride, that, right?

To have asked her.

And if he had screwed it up, he

would have screwed it up, but he had

that sixth sense that something had happened.

Of course, if there had been, for example,

the wedding planner, what would have happened is

that he would have found out, but since

the wedding planner was no longer at the

wedding, I could not find out about it.

And it is true that I was a

scoundrel for not asking.

And it is true that, having seen the

bride's last name, I should have inspected a

little more, which I did not do, right?

Anyway, mistakes that, well, they are enjoying it

and they are strengthening it in quotation marks,

right?

And some quarrel that he has with his

partner.

So nothing else, friends, that's all.

Soon there will be some other video with

fails and some shit like this.

So nothing else, I hope you liked it,

that you had a good time and see

you soon.

See you later!

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