Original subtitles

ARIEL PRODUCTION presents

MUHTEŞEM AKSOY (MAGNIFICENT HOLYBLOOD)

We'll all be free, when God appears.

-Are we recording? -The sound's coming through.

Dear audience, you're about to witness the extraordinary...

...life story of Muhteşem Aksoy.

Muhteşem Aksoy became a political phenomenon in the mid-1960s...

...but he was censored by the authorities of the time.

All the news about him was collected, and burnt...

...and his ashes were scattered in the cold water of the Bosphorus.

Muhteşem Aksoy spent a short...

...but turbulent period of his life...

...in this mansion that you can see behind me.

While we present you the extraordinary...

...life story of Muhteşem Aksoy...

...we'll show you the images we have collected from different sources.

Muhteşem Aksoy was born on a hot July night...

...in 1936 in the United States of America.

His father, Dr. Tevfik, lectured at the University of California...

...on the genetic psychology of people who did not bite mosquitoes.

Neden?

Bu insanlığın en büyük sorusudur.

Sivrisinekler bazı insanları ısırır, bazılarını ise ısırmaz.

Neden?

Genetik psikoloji yüzünden.

Bunu asla unutmayın:

Siz istemediğiniz sürece hiçbir sivrisinek ısırmaz.

Hiçbiri, asla.

Çok yaşa genetik psikoloji!

Yaşasın genetik psikoloji!

One evening when he lost faith in the theory...

...Dr.Tevfik burned all his articles and settled in the nearest swamp...

...and with his book of swamp stories...

...he became the best-selling author in the world.

His mother Mualla, a cryptographer spent most of her life...

...on the island of Saint Cocteau which...

...we have never heard of except in local newspapers...

...analyzing the sounds coming from the rock.

By measuring the frequency settings...

...she was able to capture the appropriate range of sound...

...but was unable to decipher the incoming messages.

The United States is concerned...

...and wants the sounds coming from the rock to be recorded.

Açıkçası ve kesinlikle önümüzde bir tehlike var.

Hazırlıklı olmamız gereken bir tehlike.

Since the sounds could turn into a physiological weapon...

...and cause deaths by turning into a physiological weapon the Senate...

...which convened urgently decides to declare war...

...on the rock on security grounds.

And bombs are dropped for days.

After days of bombing the sounds coming...

...from the rock don't stop, a ceasefire is declared...

And as the war ends Muhteşem is enrolled...

...in the cycling team of the school.

Is the photo shoot over?

Won't you do an interview?

Please let's do an interview.

I have something important to say.

Sir, do you have a bell jar?

They are always touching my trophy...

...and I'm working on a project to donate...

...my trophies to the cycling museum...

...but I might also not donate them because I love my trophies very much.

Besides, I don't want to compete...

...in the same class with these adolescents.

Genç şampiyon kaza geçirdi.

Right after the great interview Muhteşem has an unfortunate accident.

A spark from his tyres during training turns into a big fire.

Water!

Find water!

Water!

Water!

Water!

Water! Find water!

Water!

Water!

You have used up all the water.

I hate each and every one of you.

Get me some water, my bike's on fire.

While the fire that spreads to the oil pipeline...

...spreads to the surrounding villages and towns...

...Muhteşem, who is taken to the air ambulance...

...is taken to the northern countryside...

...because of the pilot's disorientation.

The pilot, who is interrogated...

...is released on the grounds that...

...he is mentally unstable and given some medication.

The president orders the champion to be brought to the White House immediately.

An emergency crisis desk is set up...

...and the name of the operation is "The Little Big Man".

Muhteşem is on his way to the White House.

The plan is simple. He is brought from hand to hand.

Muhteşem is transferred to Washington after the first intervention.

While the public flocks to the hospitals...

...to give blood to Muhteşem...

...the president's special team...

...is brought to the White House in a hurry.

After 48 hours in surgery Muhteşem...

...is entrusted to two disqualified doctors, for organ transplant.

The operation is closed to the press.

Dr. Black!

We're losing the patient. Quick, get some cotton!

More cotton! More cotton!

The cortex is completely burnt out.

We need to replace it urgently.

What can we do?

There's a musician who was trying to compose...

...on the railway when he was hit by a train.

Black, born in Mississippi.

What do you think? But he is a bit old.

Great.

Scalpel, I should skin him.

Reason?

Economic? Political?

The whole skin is flaking off.

It is burnt!

They say there is a new cream.

It makes you 10 years younger.

Get me some skin!

Age 25.

Killed by the Phalangists in the Spanish Civil War.

Will it work for you?

Cause of death?

Monarchy. Moderate views.

The patient's autonomic nervous system has completely collapsed.

We shall give him Max Stirner.

We are losing the patient.

I need to pump now.

Leave it to me.

Give it to me.

Leave that too.

-Give me cotton. -Cotton?

More cotton.

It's done.

How did you do it?

-I do not say. -Ah, get out of here.

Doctor Black and Doctor Weirdo bring...

...Muhteşem back to life after days of operations.

Thanks to his glasses, he will be able to see even in black and white.

Tailor Nuvarbaban sews a fireproof fabric suit for Muhteşem.

Muhteşem will never take off this suit.

Muhteşem's wounds slowly heal.

Muhteşem, who spends most of his time on the beach...

...falls in love at a sunset.

They dance and light fires all night long.

Muhteşem is in a dream.

The dark clouds don't delay.

One night, Sana's mother, Dolores...

...gathers the family in the living room.

She tells them that kitchen robots are going to take over the world...

...and that they must inform the police and the TV channels.

The family argues until midnight.

Nothing comes to a conclusion.

Father Paul throws himself out...

...into the street to try and sort things out.

He smokes about two packs of cigarettes.

He thinks all night long.

The kitchen robots.

He must protect his family.

The next day he confidently proposes to move to Katmandu.

New house, new neighbors.

The tourist agency he called informed him...

...that there are no food processors in Katmandu.

Katmandu, which is put to vote, is accepted with a 2-1 vote...

...Sana is taken to Katmandu on the first plane.

Muhteşem is sad.

His second girlfriend Lulu is a beauty queen.

Muhteşem is mesmerized.

The dark clouds are not long in coming.

Lulu's parents are avid gamblers.

Repenting one thousand times, the two couldn't give up their passion.

First they lose their factories...

...and then their houses and get stuck in debt.

The family, pursued by the mafia...

...disappears in the middle of the night without informing anyone.

Muhteşem is on the verge of a great depression.

He decides to come to Istanbul, Büyükada...

...to the family heirloom mansion.

I have a face for my boss to see, and another one is just for myself.

It's a bit of a gale today.

Yes, yes.

But not quite a gale.

The weather's a bit mixed today.

It is always mixed.

Are we rolling?

Action!

Dear audience, you are about to meet Kurgay.

Kurgay means "noise" in Komarante language.

First, there was a noise.

Kurgay took his first step to Büyükada...

...in 1964 from these rocks on which...

...I'm standing, and afterwards he...

...and Muhteşem started to live in the same house.

Kurgay's story begins in the hold of a ship carrying slaves...

...from Africa to New York in the 19th century.

Having lost his family and all his friends to disease...

...and torture during the journey...

...Kurgay vows to go against the order...

...from the moment he steps off the ship.

Kurgay is bought by the hard-hearted Barnum...

...a circus owner from New York...

...and his tongue is cut out and exhibited to the public.

One midnight when Barnum's men are drunk...

...Kurgay escapes from the circus by breaking his chains...

...and finds himself on the streets of New York.

Following the sound of the saxophone...

...which he hears for the first time in his life...

...Kurgay steps inside the Club Birdland on the 52nd street.

He is hired as a dishwasher by the owner of the club.

Kurgay participates in protests for African American rights in New York.

Ayrımcı okullara artık son verilmeli!

Molotof kokteyli nasıl yapılır?

Wanted by the police in the United States...

...Kurgay flees to Europe and meets white people.

The world boxing federation organizes competitions...

...for amateur boxers all over the world...

...all over the world, all over the world...

...all over the world, all over the world...

...all over the world, all over the world.

Conditions of participation in the competition...

Everyone can participate.

I'm a very good boxer.

I'm a very, very good boxer.

We start training tomorrow.

We are sitting at the table tonight.

Tomorrow, we start training.

After that...

...raki, whisky, cigarettes, wine...

...cognac, paparoz...

Forbidden until the second episode.

Brace yourself, amigo!

Let's go.

Kurgay, a pen pal of Sugar Ray Robinson...

...reads Ray's memoirs after practice.

In 1947, before his bout with Jimmy Doyle, Sugar Ray dreams...

...that he has killed Doyle and wants to cancel the match...

...but the organizers refuse to let him.

Sugar Ray takes the fight.

After an uppercut in the middle of the eighth round...

...Jimmy Doyle can't get up again.

Sugar Ray loses his brother Benny the Kid...

...in an unfortunate way right after this painful event.

Kurgay!

Kurgay!

Where is he?

Kurgay, where are you?

What are you doing here?

Why didn't you come to practice?

You rebel!

Why are you standing like that?

Kurgay, Kurgay!

Kurgay, why are you acting like that?

What is with all this stopping?

Why are you like this, Kurgay?

Why? Why?

I don't understand!

Despite refusing to participate in training, Kurgay...

...joins the tournament after Muhteşem's persistence.

Is BBC here?

Can we start? OK.

Friends, we're dealing with a very different kind of fighter here today.

A killing machine, an emotionless villain.

His only thought is to smash his opponent's face to smithereens.

This wounded brain has various mental illnesses...

...and I have to live in the same house with this psychopath.

The other day, after training, we gathered at the gym for dinner.

I had cooked baked beans.

Sir. Why didn't I put cheese in the baked beans?

Do I have to eat baked beans with cheese?

This troublemaker started punching the walls of the house.

The 3rd or 4th punch...

I can't remember exactly.

The wall of the house collapsed and now our house has no wall.

I hope we don't get caught in the middle of a burglary.

Thieves are the only living organisms that can bend space-time.

Ma'am, please step behind the security tape.

And you, sir.

Look, a criminal is sitting here today...

...and the security here is under my control.

We all know very well that your understanding...

...of security is based on fear and hatred.

Our brains are made of electronics...

...and they're always moving around, travelling.

But this psychopath's electrons are at war.

They're in a constant state of war.

And we're about to have an electron explosion here.

And I'm responsible for the security of this place.

Please clear the hall.

Because I can feel it...

It's coming. This psycho's about to explode here.

Cancel the press conference.

Red alert!

Look at me, don't you dare make the slightest move on your trainer.

I'll break your back in two with one punch.

Come on, rebel, we're leaving.

Red alert! Meeting adjourned, disperse.

Rebel!

Dikkat lütfen!

Acil durum!

Bir elektron patlaması olacak.

Lütfen salonu boşaltın.

Kurgay faces off against Eddie Crook on day...

...two of an eventful start to the competition.

Dance.

Left.

Put a hook in it, don't hit it.

Take the dead shot.

What the hell are you doing?

Are you crazy? You look like a sack of potatoes.

Snap out of it. You're a hippie.

Do you want to die?

If I'd known, we'd have joined a suicide cult.

Do you know how crowded the sects are?

Look at me, rebel. I don't like crowds.

Now get in the ring and stop all the idiots...

...who are trying to rally under the light of the same idea.

Tear every thought to pieces with your hands until the only idea...

...in the world is the murmurs of our free hearts.

Only our hearts shall remain.

Refusing to throw a punch, Kurgay stands...

...in the centre of the ring like a statue of Buddha.

The whole hall is astonished.

In the middle of the third round...

...Eddie Crook collapses in a nervous breakdown.

Kurgay, who made all the headlines the next day...

...was nicknamed "Screaming Dor Jesus" by the Americans.

Kurgay finishes the tournament...

...as champion without a single punch.

If there were no poor, Mr. Rich, what would you do?

No. No money.

Of course, of course, anyone can enter.

We have no dress code.

Unfortunately, we cannot make a reservation.

You come, we will organize a place.

When were you planning to come?

It is not clear. It doesn't matter.

-Are we on the record? -Cemetery. Night.

Dear audience, world boxing champion Kurgay...

...bids farewell to the ring forever by leaving...

...his first-place belt to the federation.

Although he wants to bring Muhteşem arch to Büyükada...

...Kurgay does not allow it.

According to Kurgay, all arches are made of blood and tears.

When Kurgay and Muhteşem return to Büyükada...

...two big surprises await them.

Muhteşem's family lawyer has transferred...

...all their assets to his own account.

Six business houses in Karaköy, 13 flats in Moda...

...the family heirloom jewellery...

...in the safes of the mansion they lived in...

All of it flew out of their hands...

...they had one day left to get out of the house.

The blood of Muhteşem is slowly leaving his veins.

Are we in the Great Depression, huh?

Even during the Great Depression, whisky wasn't this expensive!

I can't drink whisky!

Isn't the Great Depression over?

No girlfriend!

No money! No whisky!

No life!

I have been depressed since the day I was born.

But enough! I'm a human too.

Kurgay, didn't they tell us...

Wealth and poverty.

Where the hell is this wealth?

Where the hell is this wealth?

Where the hell is this wealth?

Kurgay, we need support.

We drift like grains of sand on the beach.

We sit at the table after morning.

There's rum, there's vodka, there's whiskey.

Did you break up with your girlfriend?

Don't worry. Open a bottle.

Your daughter graduated?

Open a bottle.

The best quality is here.

A panacea for troubles.

Cheer up your cheerfulness.

Are you sad?

Pour a glass to hit rock bottom.

What is the alcohol content of this?

It is a special liqueur, sir.

The king and queen of Egypt...

...used to drink a coffee cup of this liquor...

...in the evening after dinner.

The drink of love and literature.

What is his ABV, for example?

ABV is 17.5 percent, sir.

What is the ABV of this?

Sir, we bring this drink from Siberia on sledges.

Saint Bernard, a very kind animal living in the glaciers...

...wanders the streets at night...

...and offers this drink to our homeless friends...

...from the flask around his neck.

What is the ABV, for example?

The ABV is 55 percent, sir.

What is ABV of this one for example?

Sir, this is the mightiest piece in my collection.

The drink of the king.

Elvis, used to drink this drink every night...

...before going to bed with a teaspoon of ginger in a tea glass.

My mate Erkin told me too.

A natural drink. Has a detoxifying effect.

A kind of cure.

What is the ABV for example?

Sir, the ABV of this one is 38 percent.

But because of its organic structure...

...it expands after ingestion and corresponds to 41 percent.

Does it cause expansion in everyone?

Yes, sir, we have observed this expansion...

...in everyone with a digestive system.

Now if I buy an Elvis, a Saint Bernard...

Four, two, four, eight...

96 percent.

I would be 4 percent short.

I don't want to be 4 percent short.

If I buy two Saint Bernards...

Three, five, eight, ten...

I'm up to 110 percent.

I don't want to go to 110 percent, because my health would suffer.

Isn't there a 100 percent solution?

I can't concentrate on my work...

...because I'm doing algorithms every day.

I will give him pure alcohol.

What is that for example?

I put it in high-society cocktails.

Look, you still haven't come to our frequency.

Cocktail, etc...

We stopped dancing long ago.

We are on our way.

What is the ABC of that? You tell me that.

100 percent, sir.

What are you saying?

100 percent?

So, you finally found it, huh?

Kurgay, look at me. Do you have a cigarette?

I'm craving for a cigarette.

I will light one.

I wish it was mine.

What is this? What is this?

What is this?

What is this? What is this?

Dear Muhteşem...

After I leave this wretched world, all my remaining wealth is yours.

My only request is that you build a mausoleum worthy of our family.

The 10 billion dollars in your account will be more than enough.

Farewell.

Your uncle Joe.

ZENGİN JOE ÖLDÜ MİRASINI MUHTEŞEM AKSOY'A BIRAKTI

Muhteşem attends days of meetings...

...with architects for Uncle Joe's grave.

Yes guys...

What have you done? When are we burying my uncle?

Mr. Muhteşem.

My dear partner and I have been working together for a long time.

It's been so long, we have never been apart.

We were very excited when this project first came to us.

Indeed.

We went for a quick dinner.

A delicious evening.

Your uncle was very dear to us.

Indeed.

May God keep him in heaven.

We were very excited by the first drafts of the project.

We wanted to turn things upside down.

Breaking the rules.

I think you thought of it first.

No, my old friend.

Didn't you say you would rather have the sky than the earth?

-You are very kind. -Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen...

What the hell are you talking about?

We couldn't bury a man.

I have been waiting six weeks for you.

He stayed in the cooler.

Every time I open its door, we come face to face.

The other day he got his hand in the ice bucket.

I can't drink whisky because of you guys.

Mr. Muhteşem.

We thought of a grave in the sky for your dear uncle.

-We designed it. -It is a miracle.

4000 tons of pure marble.

Unlimited view enjoyment.

From New York to California.

It is unique.

500 tons of steel 385m height.

360-degree rotatable steel head.

His head will be like a ball, Mr. Muhteşem.

Can you imagine?

Near the clouds.

Viewing terrace, living room, en-suite bathroom. Just imagine.

Gentlemen, gentlemen... Easy, easy.

Sakin olun. Sakin. Sakin olun. Sakin. Sakin. Sakin.

MUHTEŞEM CESEDİ GÖMDÜ

KAYIP CESET AVI ŞOK! KORKU! DEHŞET! PİSLİK!

RICHIE JOE'NUN GÖMÜLDÜĞÜ YER BİLİNMİYOR

MUHTEŞEM: KONUŞMUYOR! Bütün ülke cesedi arıyor. Muhteşem Aksoy biraz delirdi.

I will be able to get my beer and whisky fresh from the still.

Dear audience...

Muhteşem Aksoy has become one of the richest men...

...in the world with the inheritance from his Uncle Joe.

Muhteşem has two oil wells in Texas.

In the world of Muhteşem, money has no name.

Muhteşem is having an enjoyable and pleasurable life.

Muhteşem becomes soon addicted to cigars...

...and smokes a box of cigars.

He spends his days in his mansion...

...watching Uncle Joe's film noir collection.

O uçağa biniyorsun.

Anlamıyorum. Peki ya sen?

Uçak gidene kadar onla kalıyorum.

Cesursun. Güçlüsün.

Bu cesaret ve güçten bana da biraz ayırabilirsin.

Senden o kadar nefret ediyorum ki.

Hayır, seni hiç sevmedim Walter. Ne seni ne de bir başkasını.

Dediğin gibi bunu yapmakta çok haklıyım.

A frequent guest of honor, he falls in love at first sight...

...with Louise Cordet at a concert he attends.

Louise, a member of the royal family.

She is the goddaughter of Philip, Duke of Edinburgh...

...and is currently very popular in the music world.

Louise Cordet.

İnançlarına çok sadıktır. Çünkü rüzgârın hangi yönden estiğini bilmek istiyor.

Louise and Muhteşem fall in love.

All flowers bloom for them, all songs speak of their love.

Louise takes Muhteşem to the palace to introduce him to the royal family.

He is not a fan of the gorgeous royal family.

They talk a lot and laugh all the time.

He writes in his diary that he is never met people...

...with such a bad sense of humor before.

While everyone is laughing to themselves...

...Louise announces that he is going to marry Muhteşem.

The royal finds it funny.

The two marry in a surprise wedding.

KRALİYET SARAYI 1965

Günaydın Louise.

Günaydın Muhteşem.

Ufak bir problemim var.

-Neymiş o? -Kurgay.

-Evet? Ne olmuş Kurgay'a?

Her gün buraya Budist arkadaşını getiriyor.

Ve gece olana dek bahçede oturuyorlar.

Her yer tütsü kokuyor.

Tuhaf tuhaf insanlar.

Abartıyorsun tatlım.

Birkaç arkadaşını getirmiş işte. Ne var bunda?

Geçen gün duvara mandalalar çizdiler!

Çizsinler.

Kurgay'ın tüyleri her yerde.

Lavabo saç dolu.

-Kurgay çok temizdir. -Farkında mısın bilmiyorum ama...

...burası bir saray, Muhteşem. Sıradan bi yer değil.

Kraliyet Sarayı!

-Bütün kraliyet bizle dalga geçiyor. -Neden onlar bu kadar umrunda?

Kim bu kraliyet?

-Çok streslisin. -Stresli mi? Ben mi?

-Evet, bence toplantılara katılmalısın. -Biliyor musun...

Sen çok bencil bir adamsın.

Bencil mi? Bana bu şekilde saldırma.

Asıl sen bana saldırıyorsun. Her dediğime cevap vermen çok küstahça!

Şimdi kibirli mi oldum? Başımı ağrıtıyorsun!

-Saldırmadan konuşamaz mısın? -Bencil kelimesini kullan sensin!

-Önce sen bana streslisin dedin! -Stresli mi?

Stresli ve bencil aynı şeyler değil!

Karakterime saldıramazsın.

Artık dans bile etmiyoruz.

Her şey kraliyetle ilgili. Sen kimsin artık onu bile bilmiyorum.

-Aileme hakaret edemezsin. -Sen gerçekten manyaksın!

Seni çok daha önce terk etmeliydim!

Defol git evimden.

Burada olmayı hak etmiyorsun.

-Senden boşanmak istiyorum! -Gel Kurgay! Gidiyoruz.

Bencil! Saygısız! Kaba! Küstah!

Muhteşem is free.

Every day he shows up with another beauty.

Groovy... Speedy...

Smoky... Juicy...

Lovely... Cozy...

Naughty... Mighty...

Lying in the most magnificent fruit platter of the world...

...Muhteşem is applying sun cream.

He's very popular and he doesn't know what's going to happen to him.

A feminist faction, which has been planning to kidnap Hugh Hefner...

...the owner of Playboy for a while...

...decides to kidnap Muhteşem...

...when they cannot enter the Hefner's mansion.

You kidnapped the wrong people. I'm a feminist.

Wind Valley 1965

Let me go, you've got the wrong person.

I'm a feminist too, I'm one of you.

Why did you kidnap me?

Beautiful women like you it's unbecoming to kidnap...

...an innocent like me.

We're not women!

And nobody's innocent.

-What the hell does that mean? -Shut up!

Simone de Beauvoir is my friend.

-Many years in Paris... -Shut up!

You're not one of us!

You're a horseman like the others!

I've never ridden a horse.

-Where? -Who?

The famous playboy.

Hugh? I don't know, he's probably in the mansion...

...he doesn't come out much.

Move! Get up!

Get up.

Move!

-I'll walk again? -Walk!

-Come on! -And do you walk everywhere?

Stand up!

I'm a feminist.

Let me go, I'm a feminist!

-I'm a feminist. -Stand up! Go!

I'm a feminist.

Is that the place?

Yeah, that's the mansion. There's two lions at the door.

-I'll call them right away. -Shut up, how can we get in?

How to can you get in?

How many people are guarding?

Are there secret passages?

First of all, I would like to start by offending you...

...for including elements of violence in your action.

Violence?

You tied my hands. You taped my mouth.

You have committed inhuman acts.

Answer my question!

Keep your political nonsense to yourself!

Where's Hugh Hefner?

You don't know shit that's going on!

You don't understand, this is a whole new one!

All right, fine. I'll tell you everything.

Do you have some whisky?

Whisky-drinking Muhteşem with feminists...

...tells everything he knows about Hugh Hefner.

He gives the feminists the spare key to the Hefner mansion...

...and the passwords to Hefner's safes.

Muhteşem talks too much, eats too much and drinks whisky all the time.

Feminists leave Muhteşem.

Returning to her 50-room palace...

...Muhteşem realizes that he is not a feminist.

Expensive habits, the people around him...

...the life he lives is empty and meaningless.

Muhteşem is unhappy, more unhappy than ever.

Doesn't drink cocktails in the morning...

...go for massages in the afternoon...

...take part in greyhound races, or deal with the stock market.

Closed his oil wells and locked his factories.

Muhteşem, searching for the meaning of life.

He comes across an old family album in the room of the great Uncle Joe.

His uncle Joe is standing on a camel on one of his travels.

Uncle Joe seems to be very happy.

Uncle Joe's happiness excites Muhteşem.

Muhteşem thinks of the camel.

He wonders where it is now and what it's doing?

Muhteşem wants to be friends with the camel.

He spends all his fabulous fortune to find the camel.

KAYIP DEVEMİZ İÇİN BİRLEŞİN

GÖÇEBENİN ÇAĞRISI BİRLEŞİN VE DEVE DOSTUMUZU GERİ ALIN

KAYIP DEVEMİZİN AVINA KATILIN

Where is this camel? Give us our camel!

Liars! You're lying!

Tourism minister?

What are you doing, tourism minister?

Man, you couldn't find a camel.

I wonder what the hell you guys do.

Hello? Minister of Tourism?

What have you done?

What have you done? You couldn't find a camel.

Find me the camel quickly or I'll cut the money.

Hello Tracey, quick, get me the president of the CIA.

Look at me, president, open your ears and listen to me.

I want you to make a face recognition programme.

Face recognition programme.

Yes.

Start a worldwide campaign.

Everyone take a photo of their camels and send it to us.

The programme shall compare photos.

If he finds our camel, it shall alert us.

Muhteşem can't find camel.

As he becomes a political phenomenon...

...he has close relations with the politicians of the time.

We see Muhteşem here while he's checking...

...the National Aeronautics and Space Administration.

Muhteşem is politicised.

He then participates in American civil rights actions.

It would thrill Muhteşem to have everyone in solidarity.

Muhteşem comes to a decision...

...that the most powerful feeling is the feeling of solidarity.

He feels as light as a feather.

He's no longer alone.

With the last of his money, he'll set up a TV channel.

He's got a bright idea in his mind.

Dünyalar Savaşı

Are you a true warrior or a coward?

Will you be in the north or the south?

Real warriors, call us.

Savaşmak için bizi arayın.

Come on, warriors!

Come on, heroes!

Come on, call us!

Savaşmak için bizi arayın.

Only one winner.

Savaşmak için bizi arayın.

In Muhteşem's war of the worlds, the world will be divided into north and south.

Those who want to fight will move north...

...and those who support peace will move south.

The war in the north will continue...

...until there is a single human being left.

For the first time humanity is encouraged to migrate...

...and fight by a television programme.

Will you be in the north or in the south?

Real warriors...

Call us.

Dünyalar Savaşı

The United States of America takes over.

And expels Muhteşem for trying to start a war.

The Queen says that Muhteşem must never come to England...

...that her nerves are shattered.

The Vatican apostrophises Muhteşem twice.

The Russians call for a meeting...

...saying that a unity is needed against Muhteşem.

World heads of state meet in Moscow.

Each country is consulted individually.

With the participation of all countries, Muhteşem is expelled.

Muhteşem is expelled from the world.

Kurgay won't leave Muhteşem alone.

We enter our country in the evening on Friday...

...we stay on Saturday, we leave on Sunday at noon.

What's wrong with that, dear? What kind of people are these, Kurgay?

Kurgay?

Kurgay?

I hear voices.

Do you hear that?

Music sound.

Yes, yes, music sound.

Kurgay, am I starting to hear voices?

I can't stand it anymore.

Who are you?

I've come to save you.

How are you Kurgay?

Kurgay? Who is this woman?

Don't be sad anymore.

We will apply the seven-day rule.

Everything is gonna be great.

You'll wait six days and come back on holiday.

No one will remember you.

There are two stamps in the basket.

Day five, call Mr. Hoffman.

He'll describe it to you.

I brought music and fruit.

Eat it well.

Goodbye.

Is this Mr. Hoffman?

Sir, I'm Muhteşem.

I hope I'm not disturbing you.

A few days ago, a lady who we suspected of being...

...a little crazy told us to call you.

Oh, yeah, so you know about it.

Kurgay, who are these people?

What kind of hell have we fallen into?

Yes, we've got.

Kurgay, give me the stamps.

Yeah, we're putting it in our mouths.

Take it in your mouth. Okay?

In our mouths, Mr. Hoffman.

Yes, we eat it well. Eat it well.

Muhteşem and Kurgay, they wait six days and come back on a free day.

No one remembers them.

They haven't got any money left.

Muhteşem is eating the last apple left.

Muhteşem is so excited that he found the guitar.

He wants to play rhythm and blues.

With Kurgay, they start a band.

Muhteşem calls master Sam Chatmon...

...to learn the specifics of rhythm and blues.

Mr. Chatmon? Hi, I'm Muhteşem.

Muhteşem Aksoy.

How are you?

Thank you very much.

Mr. Chatmon, I have a small question for you.

What do you think a good rhythm and bluesman should be?

Yes.

Yes.

Must be black.

Yeah, I'm black. I'm a black man.

Yes.

Yes.

Must eat pig shit.

Speaking of pig shit, Mr. Chatmon...?

Real pig shit?

Of course, it's real pig shit. Got it.

No, I eat. Why shouldn't I?

I'd eat it every day if I could play guitar well, Mr. Chatmon.

Do you happen to have any pig shit?

The fresher the better, of course.

I don't want dried.

No, I don't. No, I don't want dried.

Yes, make it fresh, dear.

There's brown pig shit.

Yes. Of course, it would.

It would be great.

Yes. Yes.

How do I get it?

Are we on board?

Last five seconds.

The first drafts of Sex and Rage were played today, Ed.

There's been one such grave incident.

I notified the FBI immediately. Immediately.

And they've started an investigation in my office right now.

According to the initial reports, there were a lot of fingerprints.

All artists have their fingerprints in my office.

Because we're always organizing gogo parties.

It's the new fashion at the moment.

Wonderful. It's a beautiful tradition.

We organize gogo parties.

Whose house is organizing a gogo party...

...everyone comes there with their gogo...

...and there are about five kilos of gogo at home Ed.

I don't use it, I'm not a seller, I'm a collector.

I have money. Why should I sell it?

Oh, please. I'm reproaching you.

I have the gogo of Bo Diddley.

How am I supposed to get rid of it? Oh, how should I throw it?

It's a gift, can you throw it? You can't.

I keep it at home. What should I do?

My friends are all artists, they are very nice people.

The other day Miles came in.

With a bag in his hand. He brought half a kilo.

What is this Miles? Well, we'll sniff it.

Yes, we'll sniff it. But hey, bastard.

We haven't slept for three days.

And isn't this shit sold by the gram?

There's nowhere to put it in the house.

I'm a fashion victim.

Please let me go. I'm an artist.

MUHTEŞEM SINIRDIŞI EDİLDİ GOGO ÇAĞI

The deported Muhteşem calls Albert Hoffman.

Albert Hoffman tells Muhteşem to take one stamp and go to the forest.

Stop!

Don't come closer!

Who are you?

Muhteşem! Muhteşem Aksoy.

Please don't shoot, I'm innocent.

What planet are you from?

You finally found us, huh?

Where's your army, your guns?

A civilization that enjoys war, fire, suffering...

Discriminators!

You're all discriminators!

Extravagant, arrogant, greed heads!

Power-hungry, sky-ignorant, miserable, gossiping gluttons!

You make life a living hell, chasing petty scores!

To cover up your incompetence...

...you tear up everything beautiful and feed it to your executioners!

Envious! Scoundrels!

While making speeches about conscience and equality...

...and dancing on blood and flesh...

...you hid behind those rotten laws!

Your bureaucrats cleaned your bloody hands with luxury and splendor!

I want to spit on your thick, hand-soaked skins!

And I want to shout "fools" in your faces one by one!

Fools!

We've listened to the sound of your arrogance...

...at every step you've taken till dawn!

You have silenced!

You have silenced the hearts...

...that seek the good and the beautiful!

You put bloody daggers in their hands!

Until the evils we thought would never happen happen to us!

We continued to read the texts you call sacred!

And only poverty and sick bodies are left to us!

Muhteşem Aksoy disappeared on a hot summer day in 1965.

Kurgay continues to search everywhere for his beloved friend.