Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:05,105 --> 00:00:05,472
- Shoot!
Shoot!
2
00:00:06,206 --> 00:00:07,374
- What is it?
3
00:00:07,407 --> 00:00:09,542
- I dropped my pen
in this crack.
4
00:00:09,576 --> 00:00:11,077
- On purpose?
5
00:00:11,111 --> 00:00:12,412
- Yes.
6
00:00:12,445 --> 00:00:16,216
I'm waiting for the splash
to see how deep it goes.
7
00:00:16,249 --> 00:00:18,118
No, not on purpose.
8
00:00:18,151 --> 00:00:20,387
And also, how did this
get in here?
9
00:00:20,420 --> 00:00:22,522
- [scoffs] How should I know?
10
00:00:22,555 --> 00:00:24,824
I mean, and even though
I clearly
11
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,227
had nothing to do with that
because I wasn't even here
12
00:00:27,260 --> 00:00:29,429
when I assume some guy did it
13
00:00:29,462 --> 00:00:31,564
because it's always men
who break stuff--
14
00:00:31,598 --> 00:00:32,832
I mean, always--
15
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:34,768
I will take care of it, OK?
16
00:00:34,801 --> 00:00:36,403
There we go.
Good as new.
17
00:00:36,436 --> 00:00:38,304
Moving on.
18
00:00:39,339 --> 00:00:41,508
- What did you do?
- [sighs]
19
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,176
Remember that new cocktail
I wanted to make
20
00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:44,511
with fresh coconut milk?
21
00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:45,512
- The one that Bobbie
said you couldn't
22
00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:48,281
because of the "no machetes
in the bar" rule?
23
00:00:48,314 --> 00:00:49,816
- Yeah, and that
wasn't even a rule
24
00:00:49,849 --> 00:00:52,585
until she saw me with it.
25
00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:55,622
I mean, it's supposed
to be America, right?
26
00:00:55,655 --> 00:00:57,524
[sighs]
27
00:00:57,557 --> 00:01:01,127
Well, anyway,
I used a hammer instead.
28
00:01:01,161 --> 00:01:05,298
Fun fact: coconuts roll.
29
00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:07,434
But don't you worry.
I will get your pen back.
30
00:01:07,467 --> 00:01:09,769
- How?
- I am not a total loser.
31
00:01:09,803 --> 00:01:11,338
I can do stuff.
32
00:01:11,371 --> 00:01:14,641
Takoda, can you get
Steve's pen?
33
00:01:14,674 --> 00:01:16,443
It fell into the crack.
34
00:01:16,476 --> 00:01:18,545
- I warned you
someone could get hurt.
35
00:01:18,578 --> 00:01:21,281
- [scoffs]
He lost his pen, not his toe.
36
00:01:23,650 --> 00:01:24,718
- Hey, Emmett.
37
00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:27,654
You got any idea how to get
Steve's pen out of here?
38
00:01:27,687 --> 00:01:30,757
- Have you tried dynamite?
39
00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:32,625
Step aside.
I'll get it.
40
00:01:36,196 --> 00:01:38,298
[groans] Gabby, give me
something sticky.
41
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:45,238
- It's fine.
42
00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:47,407
I was done with it anyway.
43
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:48,775
- Are you sure
you want to use that knife?
44
00:01:48,808 --> 00:01:50,310
Wouldn't it dull the blade?
45
00:01:50,343 --> 00:01:54,214
- Oh, trust me, this knife
is really, really tough.
46
00:01:54,247 --> 00:01:56,383
{\an8}[blade snaps and clatters]
47
00:01:58,685 --> 00:02:01,221
- You know what you
should have used?
48
00:02:01,254 --> 00:02:03,690
A machete.
49
00:02:03,723 --> 00:02:08,261
- ♪ Sometimes it feels
like a big ol' fight ♪
50
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:10,463
♪ To get through the day ♪
51
00:02:10,497 --> 00:02:11,831
♪ And sleep on
through the night ♪
52
00:02:11,865 --> 00:02:13,833
♪ But here
you'll find a place ♪
53
00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:17,570
♪ That'll surely
lift your spirits ♪
54
00:02:17,604 --> 00:02:22,742
♪ You belong
at Happy's Place ♪
55
00:02:22,776 --> 00:02:25,245
{\an8}- I'm so sorry, Emmett.
56
00:02:25,278 --> 00:02:27,380
{\an8}- Oh, it's OK.
It's just a knife.
57
00:02:27,414 --> 00:02:28,682
{\an8}- What's going on out here?
58
00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:30,817
{\an8}Takoda texted,
said y'all needed help.
59
00:02:30,850 --> 00:02:33,353
{\an8}- You ratted me out?
60
00:02:33,386 --> 00:02:34,821
{\an8}- I'm not new.
61
00:02:34,854 --> 00:02:37,891
{\an8}This was going somewhere bad.
62
00:02:37,924 --> 00:02:39,726
{\an8}- My pen fell in this crack.
63
00:02:39,759 --> 00:02:41,828
{\an8}- And I broke my knife
going after it.
64
00:02:41,861 --> 00:02:45,465
{\an8}- Why didn't you just
use a magnet on a string?
65
00:02:45,498 --> 00:02:48,835
{\an8}- 'Cause I'm a cook,
not a science teacher.
66
00:02:48,868 --> 00:02:50,236
{\an8}- Gabby, get me Mildred.
67
00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:52,906
{\an8}- Oh, yeah.
68
00:02:52,939 --> 00:02:54,874
{\an8}- Whoa!
69
00:02:54,908 --> 00:02:56,476
{\an8}You named your crowbar?
70
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,745
{\an8}- Well, it'd be weird
if I named all my other tools
71
00:02:58,778 --> 00:03:00,947
{\an8}and not her.
72
00:03:00,980 --> 00:03:03,583
{\an8}- I don't think that's
the right tool to use, Bobbie.
73
00:03:03,616 --> 00:03:06,853
{\an8}- Says the man
with the broken knife.
74
00:03:06,886 --> 00:03:10,724
{\an8}I'm just gonna pop open
this little part right here.
75
00:03:10,757 --> 00:03:12,325
- Oh!
76
00:03:12,359 --> 00:03:13,893
- Hell, you should
have used dynamite.
77
00:03:13,927 --> 00:03:16,730
It would be less damage.
78
00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:17,964
- Here's your pen, Steve.
79
00:03:17,997 --> 00:03:19,299
- Thank you, Bobbie.
80
00:03:19,332 --> 00:03:20,600
Come to Daddy.
81
00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:22,802
You're now safe from
the wicked witch of the bar.
82
00:03:25,939 --> 00:03:28,041
- Think anybody will notice?
83
00:03:28,074 --> 00:03:30,010
- I'll get my toolbox.
84
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,678
You took this somewhere bad.
85
00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:34,314
- Hmm.
- Hey.
86
00:03:34,347 --> 00:03:36,449
There's a bottle of whiskey
hidden in there.
87
00:03:36,483 --> 00:03:38,785
- Oh.
- That is so weird.
88
00:03:38,818 --> 00:03:40,487
Who would do that?
89
00:03:40,520 --> 00:03:42,055
- I bet it was Daddy.
90
00:03:42,088 --> 00:03:43,390
Yep.
91
00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:44,791
He was always stashing stuff,
92
00:03:44,824 --> 00:03:46,659
hoping it would be
worth something someday.
93
00:03:46,693 --> 00:03:48,428
- Oh, that's right.
- Yeah.
94
00:03:48,461 --> 00:03:49,996
- Like when he hid
those baseball cards.
95
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:52,499
- Oh, yeah, he waited
till they were rare and old,
96
00:03:52,532 --> 00:03:54,868
and then he sold them
and went to the World Series.
97
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:57,470
He loved stuff with themes.
98
00:03:57,504 --> 00:03:59,039
- Like when he hid those
$1 bills because he wanted
99
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,341
to go to the strip club.
100
00:04:06,479 --> 00:04:07,914
- That's not funny.
101
00:04:07,947 --> 00:04:09,816
- Oh, I was kidding.
- Mm-hmm.
102
00:04:12,552 --> 00:04:14,521
- So what do you think
this whiskey was for?
103
00:04:14,554 --> 00:04:16,890
[gasps] Maybe he wanted
to go to the Kentucky Derby.
104
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,625
- [laughs] No.
- No, no.
105
00:04:18,658 --> 00:04:21,928
- No, he loved horse races but
not enough to be in Kentucky.
106
00:04:21,961 --> 00:04:22,962
- Yeah.
107
00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:25,799
[upbeat music]
108
00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:27,600
- Oh, I found it.
109
00:04:27,634 --> 00:04:30,837
I found out why Daddy
stashed that bottle.
110
00:04:30,870 --> 00:04:32,105
- Blueprints?
111
00:04:32,138 --> 00:04:35,842
- Back then, he wanted to build
a patio with a whiskey barn.
112
00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:37,777
- Patio is a good idea.
113
00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:41,348
You know, food just tastes
better without walls.
114
00:04:41,381 --> 00:04:44,718
- When I first started working
for him, he made me promise,
115
00:04:44,751 --> 00:04:47,854
cross my heart, that one day,
we would be together,
116
00:04:47,887 --> 00:04:50,890
having drinks on that patio.
[sighs]
117
00:04:50,924 --> 00:04:52,759
- I'm sorry you didn't
get to do that.
118
00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:53,993
- Yeah, me too.
119
00:04:54,027 --> 00:04:55,562
But maybe
he'd be happier knowing
120
00:04:55,595 --> 00:04:57,630
that his two daughters
will be doing that.
121
00:04:57,664 --> 00:05:01,735
- Mm, you don't think
he'd rather be alive?
122
00:05:01,768 --> 00:05:02,736
- Oh, stop it!
123
00:05:02,769 --> 00:05:05,872
Get online and see how much
this sucker is.
124
00:05:07,874 --> 00:05:10,744
- Selling hidden liquor--
feels so dangerous!
125
00:05:10,777 --> 00:05:12,412
- [laughs]
126
00:05:12,445 --> 00:05:15,115
It's not exactly bootleggin',
but me too.
127
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:17,584
Hey, if we start building soon,
we could get the patio
128
00:05:17,617 --> 00:05:19,119
finished by midsummer.
129
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:21,421
- Wait, Bobbie, look at this.
130
00:05:21,454 --> 00:05:22,689
This can't be right.
131
00:05:22,722 --> 00:05:24,724
We could build
a whole bar with this.
132
00:05:24,758 --> 00:05:27,594
- Clearly you've never
built anything.
133
00:05:29,629 --> 00:05:33,433
But if that's even close,
I can finally keep my promise.
134
00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:35,568
- [sighs] Wow.
135
00:05:35,602 --> 00:05:37,604
You know, last year,
I found $20 in my pocket,
136
00:05:37,637 --> 00:05:39,639
but this is way...
[singsongy] Better.
137
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:43,476
- You know, Daddy always said
the bar will provide.
138
00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:45,512
Man, was he right.
139
00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:47,647
- Is there anything
alcohol can't fix?
140
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:54,354
- Hey, Emmett.
141
00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:56,990
You got a minute?
142
00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:58,725
- Yeah, I've got a minute,
143
00:05:58,758 --> 00:06:02,028
but I'm gonna use it
for myself.
144
00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:05,131
- I just wanted to let you know
that I feel terrible
145
00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,733
that you broke your knife
helping me.
146
00:06:06,766 --> 00:06:09,536
So don't worry.
I will be replacing it.
147
00:06:09,569 --> 00:06:11,137
- Oh, I'm good.
148
00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:12,739
- Don't be silly.
149
00:06:12,772 --> 00:06:14,074
What's a chef
without his knife?
150
00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:16,843
Just a man in a funny hat.
151
00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:19,546
- Well, look around.
I got plenty of knives.
152
00:06:19,579 --> 00:06:21,081
And hell, you can't
throw a knife in here
153
00:06:21,114 --> 00:06:22,916
without hitting another knife.
154
00:06:22,949 --> 00:06:27,587
- Sure, sure, but I know
this was a special one for you.
155
00:06:27,620 --> 00:06:28,788
- Yeah, it was special.
156
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:31,958
I used it out back once
to kill a rat.
157
00:06:33,493 --> 00:06:35,962
- What?
How could you do that?
158
00:06:35,995 --> 00:06:37,664
- It was a rat, Steve.
159
00:06:37,697 --> 00:06:39,532
- No, not the rat, the knife.
160
00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:41,201
How could you
treat it like that?
161
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:42,902
- How was I supposed
to treat it,
162
00:06:42,936 --> 00:06:45,205
take it to the movies?
163
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,207
It was a crappy knife.
164
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,009
- Maybe that's true.
165
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:50,744
Maybe it was crappy.
166
00:06:50,777 --> 00:06:52,112
But you know what you are?
167
00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:54,547
- Confused?
168
00:06:54,581 --> 00:06:55,915
- A jackass.
169
00:07:00,553 --> 00:07:01,988
- What is up with him?
170
00:07:02,022 --> 00:07:03,823
- You don't know?
171
00:07:03,857 --> 00:07:05,658
Check the handle
of that knife you broke.
172
00:07:08,128 --> 00:07:12,198
- [sighs] Aw, man.
173
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,967
"From Steve."
174
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:17,570
- He gave that to you five
years ago for your birthday.
175
00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:22,108
- That's why I hate
for people to give me gifts.
176
00:07:22,142 --> 00:07:25,845
[upbeat music]
177
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:26,980
- So we decided to auction it,
178
00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:29,749
and Bobbie's email to
the auction house was perfect.
179
00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:31,584
Tell her what you said.
- OK, I told them--
180
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,852
- I'll tell her.
- OK.
181
00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:35,221
- She said, "You should thank
your lucky stars
182
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:37,857
that a bottle of Heaven's
Holler landed in your lap."
183
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:38,758
- Now tell her
what I said at the end.
184
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,160
- [gasps] It was so great.
OK, so she--
185
00:07:40,193 --> 00:07:41,895
- I'll tell her.
- OK.
186
00:07:41,928 --> 00:07:44,698
- OK, I said, "There's a reason
they call it Heaven's Holler.
187
00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,533
"The angels took a sip
and hollered
188
00:07:46,566 --> 00:07:47,867
all the way from heaven."
189
00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:49,836
- Yeah.
- Yes! Ha-ha!
190
00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:50,704
- [laughs]
191
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:53,039
- Ah, boy,
that brings back memories.
192
00:07:53,073 --> 00:07:55,875
Spent a lot of my youth
at auctions.
193
00:07:58,044 --> 00:08:01,014
- I feel like there's
more to that story.
194
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:02,882
- My mom used to take me
to cattle auctions
195
00:08:02,916 --> 00:08:05,185
because we couldn't afford
to go to the movies.
196
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:07,153
- Yep.
There it is.
197
00:08:07,187 --> 00:08:08,755
- I got hooked, you know?
198
00:08:08,788 --> 00:08:10,757
The auctioneer
building tension,
199
00:08:10,790 --> 00:08:12,926
ranchers trying
to outbid each other,
200
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:15,095
bulls running
in the background--
201
00:08:15,128 --> 00:08:17,797
it was intoxicating.
202
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:20,900
- That smell always is.
- Yeah.
203
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:22,669
All right.
So listen up, ladies.
204
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:24,637
When we get there,
you follow my lead.
205
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:25,972
- Oh, Gabby,
you're not going with us.
206
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:28,041
- [scoffs] OK, I got to.
207
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:29,843
I am your auction expert.
208
00:08:29,876 --> 00:08:32,779
- It's sweet that you want
to help, but we got this, OK?
209
00:08:32,812 --> 00:08:34,180
Did you hear that email?
210
00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:37,117
both: Flawless!
211
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:38,818
- Listen to me,
212
00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:41,221
painting a fun and fancy-free
image of auctions,
213
00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:43,790
but there is an underbelly too.
214
00:08:43,823 --> 00:08:45,792
- Oh, I think we can handle
the little scary world
215
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,094
of selling old stuff.
216
00:08:48,128 --> 00:08:52,265
- Yeah, until you accidentally
buy a black-tagged heifer.
217
00:08:52,298 --> 00:08:54,768
And no one believes that you
were just trying to wave down
218
00:08:54,801 --> 00:08:56,670
your mom, who was getting
into a pickup truck
219
00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:58,672
with a rodeo clown.
220
00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:00,306
[phone rings]
221
00:09:00,340 --> 00:09:01,875
- [gasps]
222
00:09:01,908 --> 00:09:04,044
It's the auction house.
223
00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:05,278
Hi, this is Bobbie.
224
00:09:05,311 --> 00:09:06,680
- OK, let's give her a second.
225
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,381
They probably need
to go over logistics.
226
00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:11,618
So what did you do
with the cow?
227
00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:13,687
- Oh, my mom took her
to a farm upstate
228
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,855
so she could play
with other cows.
229
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:22,629
- OK.
Thanks for calling.
230
00:09:22,662 --> 00:09:23,763
- That was quick.
231
00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:26,733
- It's an auction house.
They talk fast.
232
00:09:26,766 --> 00:09:27,901
- What did they say?
233
00:09:27,934 --> 00:09:29,836
- Well, they said
it was too late
234
00:09:29,869 --> 00:09:31,871
to get our bottle
into the auction today
235
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,940
and we'll have to come back
next month.
236
00:09:33,973 --> 00:09:37,377
- Well, there goes getting
a patio anytime this summer.
237
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:38,978
I'm sorry, Bobbie.
238
00:09:39,012 --> 00:09:40,714
- Don't be.
239
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,415
For the last 10 years,
I haven't
240
00:09:42,449 --> 00:09:44,284
kept my promise to our daddy.
241
00:09:44,317 --> 00:09:46,019
That ends today.
242
00:09:46,052 --> 00:09:47,754
Come on, Ethel.
243
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:01,234
- I'm sorry, Bobbie.
244
00:10:02,202 --> 00:10:03,903
I wish we could make it
part of the auction.
245
00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:06,973
Bottles of Heaven's Holler
are hard to find.
246
00:10:07,007 --> 00:10:09,175
- Not if you have a crowbar.
247
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:12,045
- If it's so rare,
what's the issue?
248
00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:14,414
- Well, we print our catalogs
months in advance,
249
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:16,016
and that builds interest
in the items,
250
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:17,984
And that makes for higher bids.
251
00:10:18,018 --> 00:10:20,153
- Well, what if we built
interest in our whiskey bottle
252
00:10:20,186 --> 00:10:22,222
right now?
- Well, how would you do that?
253
00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:23,990
- Well, she's got a degree
in psychology.
254
00:10:24,024 --> 00:10:27,093
She can sell ice to a penguin.
255
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:30,063
- Off the record, if I saw
there was some buzz in the room
256
00:10:30,096 --> 00:10:31,931
for this bottle,
well, I think I might be able
257
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:34,000
to bend the rules a bit
and auction it.
258
00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:35,335
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
259
00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:36,970
- Yes.
260
00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:39,039
- What does a psychology degree
have to do with sales?
261
00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:41,941
- What's it got to do
with anything?
262
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:44,711
I was just trying to make you
sound impressive.
263
00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:47,347
- Not that I condone this,
but next time,
264
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:49,816
you could call me Doctor.
265
00:10:49,849 --> 00:10:51,885
- OK, follow my lead.
266
00:10:51,918 --> 00:10:54,754
Lucky for us, I could sell
a rosary to the pope.
267
00:10:54,788 --> 00:10:56,056
- [laughs]
268
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:02,062
- [humming]
269
00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:09,502
[gasps]
270
00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:12,005
As I live and breathe,
271
00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:14,474
a bottle
of Heaven's Holler whiskey?
272
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:17,210
I've never seen one
in person before.
273
00:11:17,243 --> 00:11:19,479
- [with Southern accent]
Peanut butter and pork rinds!
274
00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,881
It really exists!
275
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:24,417
- Oh, I know
about Heaven's Holler.
276
00:11:24,451 --> 00:11:26,052
It's pretty rare.
277
00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:28,088
Haven't seen one in years.
278
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:31,391
- Perhaps because
it's pretty rare.
279
00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:34,394
- [chuckles] Quite so.
280
00:11:34,427 --> 00:11:38,131
- My grandpap was always on
the lookout for some of this.
281
00:11:38,164 --> 00:11:42,235
He said it was
the Bigfoot of bourbon.
282
00:11:42,268 --> 00:11:43,503
- Bigfoot of bourbon?
283
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:46,272
- Peanut butter and pork rinds?
284
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:49,943
- I also heard it holds
medicinal properties.
285
00:11:49,976 --> 00:11:52,479
- Well, as they say,
what whiskey will not cure,
286
00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:54,781
there is no cure for.
[laughs]
287
00:11:54,814 --> 00:11:56,549
- [laughs]
288
00:11:56,583 --> 00:11:59,185
Yes, that is what they say.
289
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:00,487
- OK, don't push.
290
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:02,455
There's plenty to go around.
291
00:12:02,489 --> 00:12:05,425
Oh, no, there's just one
bottle, and I'm gonna buy it.
292
00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:06,926
- Oh!
293
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,828
Not sure how you're gonna
buy it,
294
00:12:08,862 --> 00:12:11,297
since I'm going
to win it at auction.
295
00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:13,433
- Oh, quite sure
of ourselves, are we?
296
00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:16,002
- Quite sure.
297
00:12:16,036 --> 00:12:19,305
- May the best paddle win.
298
00:12:19,339 --> 00:12:20,273
Mm.
299
00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:30,583
- Looks like you just sold
the pope a penguin.
300
00:12:30,617 --> 00:12:32,352
- Is that how I sound to you?
301
00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:35,588
[upbeat music]
302
00:12:35,622 --> 00:12:38,058
- Brought you some tater tots.
303
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:41,294
- Don't think for a second
you can erase your cruelty
304
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:42,962
with deep-fried carbs.
305
00:12:45,031 --> 00:12:46,366
- I made them extra crispy.
306
00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:48,268
- Leave them.
307
00:12:52,038 --> 00:12:54,107
Mmm.
Mm.
308
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:59,479
Is there something else?
309
00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:00,980
- Yeah.
310
00:13:01,014 --> 00:13:03,149
I thought I'd apologize.
311
00:13:03,183 --> 00:13:04,884
- OK.
312
00:13:11,991 --> 00:13:13,993
Hello.
When?
313
00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,362
- Settle down.
314
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:17,597
I don't do this a lot.
315
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:20,433
So when you gave me that knife,
it didn't mean much to me.
316
00:13:20,467 --> 00:13:22,102
- I'm just going to break in
and let you know
317
00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:24,637
this isn't going well.
318
00:13:24,671 --> 00:13:27,640
- It didn't mean anything to me
because you didn't either.
319
00:13:27,674 --> 00:13:30,210
- And it just keeps
getting worse.
320
00:13:30,243 --> 00:13:32,412
- I don't look
for friends, Steve.
321
00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:33,980
Never have.
322
00:13:34,014 --> 00:13:36,249
Not because I didn't want any.
323
00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:38,151
- Then why?
324
00:13:38,184 --> 00:13:41,488
- I guess it's because
I didn't want any.
325
00:13:43,056 --> 00:13:44,357
- I never looked
for any friends
326
00:13:44,391 --> 00:13:47,660
because I was afraid
I would never find any.
327
00:13:47,694 --> 00:13:51,031
- And yet... here we are.
328
00:13:51,064 --> 00:13:53,199
- Here we are.
329
00:13:54,701 --> 00:13:57,637
- So now if you ever
give me anything,
330
00:13:57,671 --> 00:14:00,006
just know it will mean
a hell of a lot.
331
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:01,908
- I'm not giving you
another knife.
332
00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:05,679
- I understand.
333
00:14:05,712 --> 00:14:07,380
- Emmett, wait.
334
00:14:18,458 --> 00:14:20,093
- Thank you.
335
00:14:20,126 --> 00:14:23,163
- Don't kill any rats
with it, psycho.
336
00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:29,235
- Enjoy your tater tots, jackass.
337
00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:39,713
[applause]
338
00:14:40,714 --> 00:14:42,682
- This is it.
We're up.
339
00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:44,050
It's so exciting.
- Yep.
340
00:14:44,084 --> 00:14:45,652
- All right, well,
our next item,
341
00:14:45,685 --> 00:14:49,189
a late addition not listed in
your catalogs, is quite a find.
342
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:54,227
Sippingwhiskey.org calls it
a velvety gem of a libation.
343
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:57,497
- BobbieandIsabella.org
call it a patio in a bottle.
344
00:14:57,530 --> 00:14:59,165
[chuckles]
345
00:14:59,199 --> 00:15:01,568
- A limited release,
this bottle of Heaven's Holler
346
00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:05,338
is from the exceptional
vintage year of 2001.
347
00:15:05,372 --> 00:15:06,306
- How cool.
348
00:15:06,339 --> 00:15:07,707
That's the year I was born.
349
00:15:07,741 --> 00:15:09,476
That whiskey and I
are the same age.
350
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:11,444
- Huh, that's weird.
351
00:15:11,478 --> 00:15:13,446
- Truth be told,
you won't find a better
352
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:17,417
small batch whiskey than a
Heaven's Holler from July 2001.
353
00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:19,052
- Wait, July?
354
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:20,387
That's the month I was born.
355
00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:22,655
- Jiminy Christmas!
356
00:15:22,689 --> 00:15:25,592
The month I was born, Daddy
bought a bottle of whiskey
357
00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,293
for us to share.
358
00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:30,730
- Weird gift for a newborn.
359
00:15:30,764 --> 00:15:32,432
- For when I was older.
360
00:15:32,465 --> 00:15:35,101
Daddy bought that bottle
to share with you.
361
00:15:35,135 --> 00:15:37,103
That's not patio whiskey.
362
00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:39,773
- [gasps]
It's Isabella whiskey.
363
00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:42,208
- Yes! Oh!
364
00:15:42,242 --> 00:15:45,045
Peanut butter and pork rinds,
we got to get it back.
365
00:15:45,078 --> 00:15:48,214
- Let's start
the bidding at $2,000.
366
00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:49,616
$2,000, thank you, sir.
367
00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:50,684
Do I hear $2,500?
368
00:15:50,717 --> 00:15:52,218
- $2,500.
- $2,500.
369
00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:54,287
- What are you doing?
- Winning some hooch.
370
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,222
- $3,000? Do I hear $3,000?
371
00:15:56,256 --> 00:15:58,191
$3,000, thank you, sir.
372
00:15:58,224 --> 00:16:00,193
- $3,500!
- $3,500.
373
00:16:00,226 --> 00:16:02,128
- What?
What about the patio?
374
00:16:02,162 --> 00:16:03,496
It was Dad's dream.
375
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:05,065
- It was also his dream
376
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,800
to save that bottle
for his daughter.
377
00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:08,568
- Do I hear $4,000? $4,000.
378
00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:11,438
Thank you.
- Oh.
379
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,507
$4,500!
380
00:16:14,541 --> 00:16:15,442
- $5,000!
381
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,544
- $5,000 to the gentleman.
$5,000, $5,000--
382
00:16:17,577 --> 00:16:18,778
- Bobbie, stop.
383
00:16:18,812 --> 00:16:21,481
We came here to make money,
and that's more than we need.
384
00:16:21,514 --> 00:16:23,516
- All right,
the bid is $5,000.
385
00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:25,452
Do I hear $6,000? $6,000.
386
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,721
- But Daddy wanted
that bottle for you.
387
00:16:27,754 --> 00:16:29,189
- I know, but it didn't happen,
388
00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:30,557
and that's OK.
389
00:16:30,590 --> 00:16:32,392
I care more
about getting our patio
390
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:34,127
than a bottle
I only found out was mine,
391
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:35,595
like, five seconds ago.
392
00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:38,098
- Going once, going twice.
393
00:16:38,131 --> 00:16:40,367
- Are you sure?
394
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:43,136
[gavel bangs]
Sold to bidder number 33.
395
00:16:43,169 --> 00:16:44,804
Congratulations, sir,
you've just won yourself
396
00:16:44,838 --> 00:16:47,841
a truly remarkable spirit.
397
00:16:47,874 --> 00:16:50,410
- Well, there's that.
398
00:16:50,443 --> 00:16:51,711
- Yep.
399
00:16:51,745 --> 00:16:53,279
Bottle is gone.
400
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:55,582
Don't have to worry
about it anymore.
401
00:16:55,615 --> 00:17:00,120
We can just enjoy
the thought of our new patio.
402
00:17:01,688 --> 00:17:03,690
- Are those happy tears?
403
00:17:03,723 --> 00:17:05,158
- No.
404
00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:06,860
- But you said selling
the bottle of whiskey
405
00:17:06,893 --> 00:17:08,528
was the right thing to do.
406
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:12,298
- And now I regret it!
407
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:14,367
How could I care so much about
something I only found out
408
00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:17,303
was mine five seconds ago?
409
00:17:17,337 --> 00:17:20,240
Why did it take me ten
to realize it?
410
00:17:20,273 --> 00:17:21,841
- Honey, I am so sorry.
411
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:25,578
Maybe we could stop the sale
or buy it back or do something.
412
00:17:25,612 --> 00:17:26,613
I don't know.
413
00:17:26,646 --> 00:17:28,415
- Bobbie, face it.
414
00:17:28,448 --> 00:17:30,316
It's over.
There's nothing we can do.
415
00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:31,518
- Yeah.
- Aah!
416
00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:32,619
- Oh!
417
00:17:32,652 --> 00:17:33,653
- What are you doing here?
418
00:17:33,687 --> 00:17:34,721
- OK, there's no time.
419
00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:36,389
I'm here to save you rubes.
420
00:17:36,423 --> 00:17:37,824
Do you want your bottle back?
421
00:17:37,857 --> 00:17:39,559
- Desperately.
- How'd you know?
422
00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:42,128
- Oh, please.
Go to a cattle auction.
423
00:17:42,162 --> 00:17:43,596
People with seller's remorse
are as common
424
00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,865
as wannabe cowboys
with fake horns on their truck
425
00:17:45,899 --> 00:17:47,634
and fake boobs on their wives.
426
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:52,205
- Can you help us?
- OK, maybe.
427
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,407
Did you sign an auction
listing agreement?
428
00:17:54,441 --> 00:17:55,642
- No.
We didn't sign anything.
429
00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:57,277
- OK, perfect.
430
00:17:57,310 --> 00:18:01,147
[clears throat]
Mr. Auctioneer, point of order.
431
00:18:01,181 --> 00:18:03,583
You mentioned that that bottle
432
00:18:03,616 --> 00:18:06,353
was never listed
in the catalog.
433
00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:09,723
And if I'm not mistaken,
that is a breach of protocol.
434
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:13,760
And if not protocol, well,
then certainly tradition.
435
00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:19,366
And if not tradition, sir,
then no doubt common decency.
436
00:18:19,399 --> 00:18:21,368
Am I right?
- Yeah.
437
00:18:21,401 --> 00:18:22,402
- Yeah.
- Am I right?
438
00:18:22,435 --> 00:18:23,670
- Yeah!
[claps]
439
00:18:23,703 --> 00:18:25,205
- I mean, what's next,
440
00:18:25,238 --> 00:18:27,307
taking the ear tag
off of a red Angus
441
00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,209
and putting it
on a Belted Galloway
442
00:18:29,242 --> 00:18:32,912
just to get
an extra 70¢ a pound?
443
00:18:32,946 --> 00:18:34,280
- Not cattle.
444
00:18:34,314 --> 00:18:36,750
Not cattle.
445
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:40,787
- Furthermore, my clients
inform me that you never
446
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:43,390
had them sign
an auction listing agreement,
447
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:45,692
which means
you have no legal right
448
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:47,260
acting as seller's agent.
449
00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:50,730
Ipso facto, there was
no sale to take place,
450
00:18:50,764 --> 00:18:53,800
which means my clients would
like their whiskey back--
451
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:55,935
no, bottle back.
452
00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:57,937
Whiskey back
means something else.
453
00:18:57,971 --> 00:19:02,409
I know because I am
also a bartender.
454
00:19:02,442 --> 00:19:05,512
[cheers and applause]
455
00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:10,684
- Are you people for real?
456
00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:12,719
- Oh, we're very real.
457
00:19:12,752 --> 00:19:14,354
And I should know.
458
00:19:14,387 --> 00:19:16,356
I'm a doctor.
459
00:19:18,892 --> 00:19:21,428
- Thank you.
No hard feelings.
460
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:22,595
- Just take the bottle.
Get out.
461
00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:26,466
- OK, look, I know you're mad,
and I totally understand.
462
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:29,536
Could I interest you in
a free coupon to Happy's Place?
463
00:19:29,569 --> 00:19:30,370
- Security!
464
00:19:30,403 --> 00:19:32,772
- I'll leave it at the front.
Run!
465
00:19:32,806 --> 00:19:35,775
[upbeat music]
466
00:19:35,809 --> 00:19:37,577
♪ ♪
467
00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:39,446
Mm.
468
00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:40,847
Salud.
[glasses clink]
469
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:43,249
- Cheers.
470
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:49,989
Mmm, perfection.
471
00:19:50,023 --> 00:19:51,024
What do you think?
472
00:19:51,057 --> 00:19:53,727
- [coughs]
Wow.
473
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,730
So this is what
$5,000 whiskey tastes like.
474
00:19:56,763 --> 00:19:58,031
- [chuckles]
475
00:19:58,064 --> 00:20:00,633
- Are my feet
supposed to feel numb?
476
00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:02,669
- That's when you know
you got the good stuff.
477
00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:05,972
It's either that
or it puts hair on your chest.
478
00:20:06,006 --> 00:20:08,008
- Hell, this will
put hair on my feet.
479
00:20:08,041 --> 00:20:10,877
- [laughs]
480
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:12,445
- [chuckles]
481
00:20:14,014 --> 00:20:17,517
Are you OK you didn't get
to build the patio for Dad?
482
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:20,754
- Well, we'll do it someday.
483
00:20:20,787 --> 00:20:24,891
But we'd have never
gotten this bottle back.
484
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:30,797
You know, it's like I feel him
sitting here with us, smiling.
485
00:20:30,830 --> 00:20:32,298
[sighs]
486
00:20:32,332 --> 00:20:33,667
- Shall we pour
one out for him?
487
00:20:33,700 --> 00:20:34,768
- Are you crazy?
488
00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:36,870
I said it's a feeling.
489
00:20:36,903 --> 00:20:39,506
[indistinct chatter]
490
00:20:39,539 --> 00:20:41,574
- That's amazing, Gabby.
491
00:20:41,608 --> 00:20:43,743
I mean, who would have known
going to that many
492
00:20:43,777 --> 00:20:45,779
cattle auctions
would be useful?
493
00:20:45,812 --> 00:20:47,981
- It's so nice
when a deprived childhood
494
00:20:48,014 --> 00:20:49,949
finally comes in handy.
495
00:20:49,983 --> 00:20:52,986
I'm still waiting.
496
00:20:53,019 --> 00:20:54,688
- Well, was I a hero today?
497
00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:55,955
Sure.
498
00:20:55,989 --> 00:20:58,024
Should people hoist me on their
shoulders, chanting my name?
499
00:20:58,058 --> 00:20:59,626
{\an8}Absolutely.
500
00:20:59,659 --> 00:21:01,094
{\an8}Should the mayor give me
the key to the city?
501
00:21:01,127 --> 00:21:02,729
{\an8}Probably.
I emailed him.
502
00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:04,964
{\an8}I haven't heard back yet.
[laughs]
503
00:21:04,998 --> 00:21:07,467
{\an8}- Whatever you do,
just don't yell at Emmett.
504
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:10,003
{\an8}He'll get all mushy
and make you tater tots.
505
00:21:10,036 --> 00:21:11,504
{\an8}- Aww!
- [laughs]
506
00:21:11,538 --> 00:21:13,106
{\an8}- Can someone fetch Mildred?
507
00:21:13,139 --> 00:21:15,008
{\an8}I'm gonna need to hit Steve.
508
00:21:15,041 --> 00:21:16,743
{\an8}[laughter]
509
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:18,845
{\an8}- I love working here.
- [sighs]
510
00:21:18,878 --> 00:21:19,946
{\an8}- Aw, that's sweet.
511
00:21:19,979 --> 00:21:23,750
{\an8}- Thank you, Daddy.
Once again, the bar provides.
512
00:21:23,783 --> 00:21:25,018
{\an8}[glasses clink]
513
00:21:25,051 --> 00:21:26,953
{\an8}Love, y'all.
- Love you.
514
00:21:26,986 --> 00:21:28,655
{\an8}- Cheers.
36580
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof