Original subtitles

Can we please hurry? We're going to miss him.

How do you even know he's going to be there?

I peeked on the ISD computers. Peeked or hacked? Hacked so I could peek.

You actually hacked into a congressman's classified files?

Yep.

Trenton Foster Jr. 's campaign's coming through Los Angeles. At 12.30,

He's actually going to eat off that roach coat?

Yeah, the guy has an analysis swearing by the Al Roker burrito.

Have you seen the guys in analysis? They could be Al Roker.

I can't believe you hacked into his private files. If Mr. Christ finds out,

you could be in really big trouble.

I'm not going to miss seeing America's most eligible bachelor in the flesh.

And how's Cross going to find out? Oh, I don't know.

Maybe when hotel security calls and says you're

hiding out under Trenton Foster Jr. 's bed.

You're making me sound like a stalker. If the shoe fits. Or the bunny boils.

I am not some crazed fan.

I just happen to like what he stands for politically.

Really?

So you still vote for him despite the hot factor?

Absolutely.

What exactly does he stand for?

Good things I'd like to vote for. Oh.

There's a peak inside your mind I wish I hadn't taken.

Heck, he's not a groper. He's got my vote.

Uh-huh.

Oh, my God, there he is.

How do I look? Like Glenn Close after she got off that rollercoaster.

Could you please stop with the whole stalker thing? We can.

And you, swim pants? Hey, I'm with you, Dee Dee.

I think it's really cool that we get to see the

congressman while he's in town campaigning.

Thank you, Duncan. At least there's one true patriot

among us. One patriot? One fatal attraction.

Very good. Nice to meet you, ma'am.

Good to see you.

Let's go press some flesh.

I didn't mean it like that.

Come on, don't you guys want to meet him? This guy could be our next senator.

We get it.

Cute guy, yay USA.

We could admire Captain America and his burrito from back here.

But you can't touch him from back here.

Okay, now you're scaring us.

So do you think it would be appropriate of me to grill him on his politics?

Maybe not while he's eating his lunch.

I think he's finished. He just threw his burrito wrapper away.

Do you think it would be inappropriate for me to take his burrito wrapper home?

For me!

See anybody?

No.

No.

But I found a shell casing.

There are three career criminals with one shot at freedom.

Now they're working for the feds who put them away.

These are the women of SheSpies. That girl's gone.

A city of angels

So exactly what happened? Well, I dove right at Trenton Foster Jr.

and took him down, and the sniper bullet just buzzed right over my head. You know,

another quarter inch and I would have had a mohawk.

Or a skunk stripe.

Or, you know, a really bad part in my hair.

So you actually put your life on the line for a man you barely know. Well,

I saw the sniper and I knew what had to be done.

My own safety be damned.

There you have it.

Duncan Ballew, the selfless hero who saved a

young congressman's life. Back to you, Paul.

So, what do you think of my performance as an ISD plant?

I think it's unfair we have to keep our identity a secret. My own safety be damned.

Tell me you didn't say that.

Yeah, that may have been a little over the top.

Unless you're Mel Gibson in Braveheart.

Well, that's kind of fitting. I mean, the whole Braveheart thing.

Uh, except you're not the Braveheart.

Dee Dee was. Trenton thinks I am.

Trenton?

Now you're on a first-name basis?

Well, yeah, after the news crews left, we went out for dinner and, you know,

shot pool and stuff. He's like a really cool guy.

The man of my dreams is in town for only two days,

and not only do I miss meeting him... But you could have shot pool and stuff.

Yeah, and who knows what a little pool could have led to. Love, marriage, children.

A little extra cash if we'd hustle.

Uh, guys?

No, seriously, this is really annoying.

Trenton Foster Jr. was my destiny.

Apparently, you're my destiny, too.

What you overheard probably sounded really weird,

but what I meant by you being my destiny was... was... was?

Sorry, Deeds. You're not giving us much to work with here.

Can I get back to you on this whole destiny thing? My defense team's on recess.

Sure.

I really want to thank you.

All for saving my life.

How did you know it was us?

Oh, I've been around long enough to know it

wasn't a simple man on the street rescue.

Yeah, more like a complex woman rescue.

The congressman is on the intelligence committee.

He knew that we were investigating the shell casing you found. Speaking of which,

any leads? Oh, there's a strong possibility it's linked to the Kumar government.

It's similar to the shell casings of ammunition used

by their terrorist cells. Yeah, I'm not surprised.

I don't have many fans over there.

Because of your controversial stance denying an

aid package to their dictatorial government?

I'm impressed.

So are we. It's a far cry from good things I should

vote for a position you took yesterday.

If you could vote.

So, let me guess. You're here to thank us for saving your

life by taking us to a fabulous restaurant for dinner?

Actually, I've requested that you accompany

me for the rest of my stay in Los Angeles.

Oh, to be food tasters at fabulous restaurants.

As bodyguards.

What was that?

Happy sound.

After yesterday, it's obvious my security team needs a security team.

While I'm here, I need the best.

You'll be working in an undercover capacity at

the Omega Hotel in Beverly Hills while Mr.

Foster is making his speech.

Oh, that reminds me.

I'd better get moving.

I still have to write it. I'll show you out.

This is so flattering.

We actually get to guard a congressman. Oh, flatter schmatter.

Bodyguarding's my least favorite thing to do.

Even if the body you're guarding looks like that?

A bullet pretty much feels the same whether you're

taking it for Tom Cruise or Kira Topp.

Yes, but whose arms would you rather die in?

Maverick from Top Gun or that goofy redhead who hawks phone plans?

She makes a good point.

Now you're both scaring me.

This is so unreal.

Protecting Trenton Foster Jr. is like living a dream.

It's a perfect way to get up close and personal without being obvious.

A little late for that after your happy sound?

Well, he's only going to be in town until tonight,

and I had to make it really clear, really fast that I'm really interested.

Yeah, well, you certainly made it really clear that you were really fast.

I didn't mean to.

I just, I don't know. I've always had this thing for Trenton Foster Jr.

I don't know what it is. It just seems like the perfect guy.

Then just relax. I mean, what he's going to be attracted to is the real Deedee,

not the come ravage me Deedee. Yeah, because that's what guys hate,

the aggressive do-me-now women.

My point is, if anything, I mean, he should be stalking you, Deeds.

You're the catch. Yeah, and how many wives do you

know would take a bullet for their husbands?

Let alone sleep with them.

How do you like the changes?

It wasn't a big rewrite. Some last-minute adjustments

because of the assassination attempt.

Comforting your public?

No, pleading with the sniper. Please don't shoot at me again.

Yes.

We found this paparazzi guy hiding in a cart of mini shampoos. Nice legs,

but the camera as a fashion accessory is a major don't.

I thought my press secretary was clear about when he could get photos, Mitch.

I can't help myself. You know I'm hooked on getting that one great shot.

You two know each other?

Mitch is one of the more aggressive celebrity stalkers.

I prefer the term sociological documentarian.

We prefer the term blood-sucking leech. What do you want us to do with him?

You can take him downstairs. Make sure you put him behind the tallest guy there.

Do what you like. You can put me behind Shaquille O'Neal. I will not be denied.

The twin. They're ready for you.

Thanks, Hayley.

You know what, Hayley? I wanted to run something

by you that I added to the end of the speech. See what you think.

Okay.

We've been working on it together.

Um, I won't let the people of California down, blah, blah, blah.

Okay, here it is.

You all know my press secretary, Haley Swan.

We've been working together for the last four years,

and we've decided to make our partnership permanent.

We're extending our stay in Los Angeles so

we can officially tie the knot. Oh, Trent.

I can't believe it.

I can't believe my man is getting married. Deeds, he was never your man. Deeds,

he was barely your acquaintance.

He was too.

We got acquainted in that hotel room real fast.

Really? What happened in that hotel room? I helped him write a speech.

I'm not sure this X-rated banter is appropriate for the office.

That whole part about no more taxes?

All mine.

Politicians use that in all their campaign speeches, Deeds.

I added an exclamation point.

Before that, it was completely devoid of passion.

Deeds, look, I know you're probably bummed. I mean,

especially after launching his political career like that.

But he and Haley look like they're really in love.

Yeah, right, love. You shouldn't even notice his speech needed punctuation.

So, when you solve for why, as you can see,

it's imperative that I was there to save the Congressman's life.

My own safety... Duncan, what are you telling her?

I was just... I actually came up with a pretty interesting theorem.

In a time-space continuum...

Stick figure one, DD, or X, actually requires the interaction of stick figure two,

Duncan, or Y, to interfere and allow enough time T to pass

while the bullet goes over the congressman C's head.

You made a mathematical equation to prove how you saved the congressman's life?

Not all on my own, of course. I still have to solve for B. B for bullet?

B for bull.

B for burrito.

As Dee Dee's momentum thrust me into the crowd, an errant burrito was launched,

which subsequently altered the bullet.

You're saying a burrito saved the congressman?

Inconclusive at this juncture. I'm still testing the theory in my lab.

I knew there was a reason I hated burritos. I knew there was a reason I hated math.

We're guarding Trenton Foster Jr. at his wedding.

Yeah, she's guarding him as long as he stays in L.A.

Yes, but at his wedding?

The sniper's still out there. The Qumran terrorists

still pose a threat. Nothing's changed.

Yeah, I got it, but at his wedding?

Dee Dee's having a hard time accepting that Trenton's tying the knot.

It's not a knot, it's a noose.

Since when did you think that? Since she wasn't the bride.

Her heart's a little bruised.

Broken.

Ripped out.

Regardless, I need the three of you on this case.

What if I told you I know of a burrito who could step in?

The wedding's going to be held in a private wing at the Omega Hotel.

There'll be extra security and very few guests.

As an added measure, Duncan's going to set up surveillance cameras and audio.

This is the woman you contact when you arrive. Miss Galena West.

She's coordinating the event.

Isn't Kalina West the woman who does all those celebrity weddings?

Otherwise known as the Wicked Witch of the West.

Oh, no.

Please do not go where I think you're gonna go with this.

Shane, you and Cassie will be working with her.

Now, see, that's exactly why I didn't want you to go.

Dee Dee, you'll be posing as Trenton Foster Jr. 's personal attaché.

Why me?

Because he requested you.

He liked the way things were before, and he's requested the same.

How about that, Deeds?

I guess you are his destiny.

Some destiny. Out of all three of us, he picked me to get the bullet.

This room is beautiful. This is exactly how I see my wedding.

Except for the whole death threat thing.

Can we please not talk about weddings?

Oh, that'll be easy. A whole weekend of wedding

stuff and we can't talk about weddings.

Feels more like a funeral to me. Could be if the sniper shows up.

One wedding and a funeral.

Wedding word again. Oh, sorry, I just got the memo.

Give me a few minutes to let it sink in. Oh, look at this rose bush.

It's so beautiful.

Smell me.

Duncan, is that you?

Look inside the rose.

Whoa. Oh, my God. It's like Tinkerbell's camera.

Roving Rose PX7 sees you, hears you, and smells good, too.

Take a whiff.

Never been a big fan of the word whiff.

Oh, my God. Burrito.

It doesn't smell like burrito. It smells like a fragrant pink rose.

Eau de burrito.

Somebody call Chanel. Duncan, your lab is in serious need of a cleaning.

Beautiful flowers, aren't they?

Ladies, I just want to warn you before the guests get here

that Haley is really nervous about the whole thing.

She has cold feet?

Well, not about getting married.

About the attempt on my life.

She was thinking about postponing the wedding.

Indefinitely?

For a few months.

But I convinced her with the three of you here. Everything's going to be fine.

So what do you say, Deedee?

Want to go find my bride?

Oh, yeah, sure. If you guys spot the sniper, tell him to shoot me.

How do you think our stalker's doing?

Not too good if it ends up the same way Fetal Attraction did.

Keep her away from the bathtubs.

I do have my work cut out for me.

Are you my help? Yes, you must be Galena West. I'm Cassie, this is Shane.

Four o'clock means ready to go.

All right, well, we'll just put our bags away.

You have five minutes to get dressed and get back here.

We have to transform this place into a wonderland

of champagne wishes and caviar dreams ASAP. Go.

Exactly what part of go wasn't clear?

I'm sorry, are you timing us right now?

Ladies, a wedding is live theater. Every action, every move,

every I do is on schedule.

Get used to it. Where's the tornado in a flying house when you need one?

Should we remind Dees that we're only on this

hellish mission because she was a stalker?

Crime never pays.

Zip it, Rosebud.

Hi. Oh, God, it's so good to see you. Thanks. Thank you so much.

Thanks for coming out.

Hi, Senator. Thank you for coming out.

Your wife... Oh, God, she's getting younger.

You know the real tragedy of all this sniper business?

We could lose a promising politician?

No.

Even if I took the bullet, his fiancée would still get all of his attention.

Roomstick. Incoming.

The bride should have had her champagne 30 seconds ago.

We only got it 10 seconds ago. Get her the champagne now.

Oh, I have no idea what I want to do with that stopwatch.

Yeah, I've got an idea.

Oh, alcohol and appetizers all in one.

Better keep these coming, honey. I don't want to lose this buzz I got going on.

Billy Carter just took out my train.

Why is it politicians always have buffoons as brothers? I don't know.

I think it's a requirement if you're going to run for president.

You know, I never actually thought about that.

Trenton Foster Jr. might actually be president someday.

So close to being the first lady.

Howdy.

Nathan Foster, brother of the groom.

And best man, if you know what I mean.

I'm trying not to.

You are one foxy lady.

What's your name?

Cassie.

Sassy Cassie.

Daddy likes.

You know, I'm the brother of the groom.

You know, I'm surprised you're not at the bachelor party.

The stripper's already here.

Well, hot damn. Point me in the right direction and push.

Chardonnay, please.

Um, we actually only have champagne and strawberries right now.

Figures my sister would marry the only politician

who cares about how he spends his money.

Oh, no, this is just for the toast. A toast to being cheap.

Looks like someone else flew in on a broomstick.

Haley?

Are you okay?

I'm just scared.

Thanks for guarding Trent and Dee Dee. He said so many nice things about you.

But every time Trent leaves the house, I'll be scared he won't come back home.

Cassie, can you hear me?

Duncan, what do we got?

Altercam is picking up movement by the column just to the left of the gazebo.

I think he might be armed.

I don't know how you guys do this, always living with

danger. It's not easy. It never really will be.

But in a way, it helps you appreciate who you're with even more.

Which I think is a positive.

It's a wonderful way of looking at it.

Thanks, Dee Dee. I hope you and I always stay friends.

Yeah, me too.

So, are you ready to go back to the party?

Duncan spotted someone.

Inside? By the altar.

Hayley, I almost forgot.

There is a big surprise for you waiting in the Versailles room.

We've got to gather everyone there. Okay.

Everyone, we're going to the Versailles room. Big surprise.

Versailles room. Surprise. Let's go. You're in danger.

Stay close.

Come along, everyone, to the Versailles Room.

What do you think? Red carpet treatment? Bring on the Oscar.

No time for acceptance speeches.

Paparazzi Mitch?

I didn't recognize you without your dress. I know my rights.

I broke into this place fair and square. Yeah,

you do have the right to remain silent.

I will not be silenced. It's a free country, and I am the watchdog of the people.

More like a mutt. Let me go.

I'm getting this shot. Yeah, I'm taking this shot.

Nice going, Shane. You pop the paparazzi.

Oh, come on. So I help one guy get past security. Big deal.

You never put two and two together that if

the paparazzi knows where your brother is,

the sniper could find out?

Thing is, every time I'm in a magazine picture

with my brother, I get a little action.

Somebody point me to the bar and push.

Okay, we're out the door and to the right, buddy.

That's the way to his room.

Let me guess, someone has dreams of being in the public eye like his brother.

To get action by default.

I'm guessing that's a step up from the action he usually gets,

because that can get expensive.

Is Mitch the only paparazzi he told? That's what he claims.

Are we seriously going to believe someone who still uses the term foxy lady?

Guys, I need you to help me figure out what to tell the guests.

They're all waiting in the Versailles room for this big surprise I promised them.

Ladies, Haley and I have changed our minds.

The wedding's off? Actually, moved up.

We're worried about security, so we're going to get married tomorrow.

Hey, Deeds, I think we finally found that surprise you needed.

Better send out the flying monkeys and let Galena know.

This is a disaster. It can't be done.

The music, the flowers, the cake, the goat cheese. Chicago wasn't built in a day.

Don't you mean Rome?

No, Chicago, the Broadway musical.

I did the rap party. Keep up with me, girls.

She's right, Hayley. You can't do this. It's

your special day. Your sister's right, dear.

Just do the best you can, Galena. I'm sure it will be beautiful.

We have less than 12 hours.

Eight of which are sleeping. You can sleep when you're dead.

Girls, you have five minutes to get into your work clothes.

We are going to transform that wonderland of champagne

dreams downstairs into a wedding wonderland of... of... wonderment.

You know what I mean, so put a fire under it.

Meanwhile, the girl that got us into this is getting a good night's sleep. Yeah,

well, she gets to sleep when she's dead, too.

Now, the bridal bouquet here, and the rest in here. Let's go.

Okay, I gotta drop. I gotta drop. This is enough wonderment for the foyer.

All right, I'm officially over this.

What is that nasty smell?

Maybe it's because we've been up all night working. No, it's not us.

Duncan's burrito rose is dying.

Oh, yuck.

Let's just move it over in this corner.

You're supposed to put this on.

Although God knows why an assistant is a member of the wedding party.

I'm Trenton's attache, Kendall, not his assistant. And the difference would be?

For the literate among us, two letters fewer and an accent mark over the E. Touché.

Now I know why Trenton hired you.

That was impressive, Deeds. Instead of punching her out, you out-punctuated her.

Cassie, can you hear me?

Duncan?

Where are you?

I'm outside in the surveillance van.

My rose is starting to have some audio problems.

Oh, bride's here. We're on.

Everything's in place, and there's your bouquet.

And on my cue, you'll open the doors. Three, two, one...

Um, Cassie?

What, Duncan? I'm picking up a strange ticking sound near the front door.

It's probably Cruella de Vil's stopwatch.

Don't move.

Lighting is crucial to capturing the blushing in Blushing Bride.

I need to adjust the dimmers.

The ticking is, it's heavy and dull. It's like, not like a stopwatch,

which is a sharp, more fervent tick, tick, tick.

You mean like a... Galena's left the foyer.

The ticking should have stopped.

No, I'm still getting it. And Didi's right.

It's more of a... Let's go.

Let's go.

Suck, suck, suck, suck. Can only mean one thing.

Hayley, throw me your bouquet.

Uh, doesn't that come later?

Throw it!

It's beeping. The ditch has become a pitch!

Tea, someone.

Come here, Shane. It's gonna blow. Get rid of it.

Bomb in the bouquet.

Flores. I'll stay with Trenton.

Cassie.

Dee Dee.

Shane.

Dustin, the floor. She's headed your way. Can you read me? Cassie.

Nice job!

I'm sorry.

It was an accident.

Duncan, your timing was perfect. You just short-circuited the bomber.

I'm a two-time hero?

These spies will be right back.

Brought to you by McDonald's.

I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.

And...

Any word from Cross about the bomber?

There's still debriefing,

but intel picked up chatter leading them to believe

that he wasn't associated with the Kumar government.

So the killer's been caught, and my husband is safe.

This is the best wedding present we could get.

Who knew the words, the killer's been caught, would be an aphrodisiac? Yeah,

duck and cover and cover your back's always spoiled the mood for me.

I can't believe he said I do. Oh.

Are you holding out for an I don't? Titi,

the minister asked if anyone objected to the marriage.

He could have said something then.

One bomb for weather is enough.

Ladies.

Thank you. It was great seeing you all.

Bye-bye, you two.

Bye. I'll be with you in just a second.

Oh, I want to thank you for all your help. If the spy thing doesn't work out,

I am looking for an attache.

I'll keep it in mind. Bye.

If you're interested.

This is Foster. Hey, how are you? Good to see you.

He wants to hire me.

But making his coffee and picking up his dry

cleaning isn't quite what I had in mind.

Hey, that's almost the same as being his wife.

Many women would argue it's the exact same thing. Hey,

at least he wants to hire you. Alina fired us.

In less than 60 seconds.

Her new personal best.

Hello.

Right now...

Okay, bye.

Bad news.

Where's some ring-hot pink? Cross wants his back at Comcent.

There may be a problem.

Then, lashing out like an avenging god, in one fluid motion, I opened the van door.

My own safety be damned.

Duncan? Yeah? What are you doing?

This won't take long.

Just, uh, oratory reenactment of my heroism. The interest is intense.

Somehow word even got leaked to the press that I took out the bomber.

And by leaked, you mean you called them and said, I took out the bomber?

No.

Honestly, I don't know how it happened.

All I know is that now I'm like some huge celebrity.

They even want me to appear on Leno.

But you never took the bomber out? It was a total fluke. I opened the van door.

Listen, I gotta get back. They're waiting for me.

I just got to the good part where I touched the door handle.

Can't believe it. He's a rock star with a pocket protector.

Didi, did you ever go near the wedding bouquet while I was in the foyer?

I'm a stalker, not a bomber.

And strangely comfortable with that label.

I was on the altar the whole time.

Then we had a problem.

The bridal bouquet was switched at 12.55. The bomb was set to go off at 1 p.m.

exactly.

According to Galena's stopwatch,

the bride was set to start down the aisle at 1 p.m.

She would have been 30 feet from Trenton.

There's no way that bomb could have taken him out.

So, Haley was the target?

She was standing right next to him when the sniper took his shot.

But who would want to kill Haley?

Don't look at me.

This is what Duncan's flower camera picked up in the foyer.

The florist wasn't wearing hot pink.

Oh, the only two people wearing hot pink were the two bridesmaids.

And since it wasn't me, it had to be Kendall.

She must have hired the assassin, worked as a team.

But why would Kendall want to hurt her own sister?

Trenton, Quentin Cross, I need to speak to you and your wife.

I see.

No, no, there's no problem. I'll call you later.

Trent's on a plane to DC, had an emergency meeting.

He left Haley at the honeymoon cabin.

Oh, good. She'll be safe there.

I'm not sure.

Haley called her sister to come keep her company.

She's not answering her cell.

Get out there.

What about these articles Duncan found?

Kendall dated Trenton Foster Jr. for almost two years.

Five years ago. Sister's dating the same guy. That's

a little weird. No, no, it's not just weird.

Check out this twisted quote from Kendall.

Trenton Foster Jr. is the only man for me.

No other woman can give him what I can give him, or ever will.

You guys thought I was obsessive. Jeez, look at this place.

Lake?

Tennis course? Golf course?

This little honeymoon hideout is bigger than Palm Springs.

Still smaller than Oprah's house. It's gonna be really

hard to find them. I don't know about that.

We've got a secret weapon on our side.

Stalker Didi.

Yeah.

Didi, if you were Kendall, what would your plan be?

Since my assassination attempts failed,

any killing I tried to do personally would have to

look like an accident so I wouldn't go to jail.

Don't ever ask me to do that again.

So how's Kendall gonna make it look like an accident?

I have absolutely no idea.

Oh, come on, Deeds, at least try.

Water is good, but it's hard to make drowning look like an accident.

Leaving a gas stove on is a bit too predictable, so I'm going with fire.

It doesn't leave any evidence.

So you think Campbell's going to burn down the honeymoon cabin?

Hard to burn down a cabin without leaving any clues.

See those windy roads?

Looks like this one dead ends at the bluff.

Perfect place for a fiery car accident.

Yeah, it's good work, Deeds.

Good work.

It's totally twisted.

Well, twisted is what we were going for.

Kendall. Kendall. Kendall. Please don't do this.

Stay still. Kendall. Kendall.

Kendall.

Kendall, please. Why are you doing this?

You're never going to get away with it.

Kendall.

Kendall.

Kendall. Please don't do this. Please.

Kendall.

Is it disturbing that your stalker persona and Kendall are one and the same?

Disturbing?

Would you want to share your persona with Norman Bates? He was a guy.

He wore a dress. You guys, let's please focus.

Okay, Dee Dee, you take Kendall. I'll go get Hayley.

How can I get Kendall?

Because twisted minds think alike.

Just because I can tap into the mind of a psycho doesn't mean I am a psycho.

Okay, I don't think the single white female defense is going to hold up in court.

Kendall! Don't! Kendall, you're never going to get away with this! Yes, I will.

Kendall!

Get away!

I drop this and everything blows. Kendall, please

don't do this. I'm your sister. Shut up!

Listen to me.

You're right about Trenton.

He does love you.

What? I should know, shouldn't I? I'm his assistant.

He talks about you constantly.

What does he say about me?

You know how your sister can be.

She tricked him.

He never wanted to marry her.

I knew it.

It's supposed to be mine! Trenton's supposed to be with me!

You're preaching to the choir, honey.

Let's go.

Stay tuned. She's Five will be right back.

Indeed.

Adam Duritz of Counting Crows is signing autographs at Presidio Records tonight.

So, uh... So, you were one of his biggest fans.

Don't you want to meet him in person? Nope.

My stalking days are over.

Glimpse into the dark side a little too disturbing?

Losing Trenton Jr. was hard enough.

Losing Adam would be like pushing me off the deep end.

So you decided to do math instead?

The distinct purpose of proving Duncan wrong, which I have.

See, since the sniper was actually after Haley,

the burrito flying over Trenton's head didn't matter at all. We are the heroes,

not some stupid burrito, no matter what the rest of the world thinks.

I don't know if that's exactly right.

My math is wrong?

No, but remember how Duncan's burrito made that rose go bad?

So we moved it to the corner of the foyer?

Well, if we hadn't moved it,

Duncan wouldn't have heard the sound of the ticking bomb.

The burrito did save the day.

Do the math.

I just cannot get a break.

Duncan, what happened to your face?

I went to appear on Leno,

and not only did I not get on because some monkey took up all of Jay's time,

but then the stupid primate bites me in the face in the green room.

I can't believe a monkey bit him. I can't believe a monkey stole his glory.

You thought losing out to a burrito was bad.

A life hangs in the balance.

And the only way to save a she-spy is to bring on the baddest girl of them all.

Back off. Trusting her will either save their friends.

I need an ambulance. Or be the end of the she-spies.

Gina, no!

On an all-new She-Spies.