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1
00:01:27,279 --> 00:01:28,864
No. Still dead.
2
00:03:20,057 --> 00:03:23,269
Well, gentlemen,
doesn't our young fellow look fantastic?
3
00:03:23,811 --> 00:03:25,563
Okay, down to business.
4
00:03:25,646 --> 00:03:27,189
Drugs.
5
00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:29,275
You got loads of them. Give us some.
6
00:03:29,358 --> 00:03:31,402
- What do you want?
- What have you got?
7
00:03:31,485 --> 00:03:33,737
God's, ups, downs, hash,
Black Moroccan, A's...
8
00:03:33,821 --> 00:03:35,865
...heroin, Charlie, speeds, acids.
9
00:03:35,990 --> 00:03:38,993
- I think I'll have a gram...
- And grass.
10
00:03:39,076 --> 00:03:40,661
I'll have a gram of cocaine.
11
00:03:40,744 --> 00:03:42,204
Get your hands off!
12
00:03:44,373 --> 00:03:45,624
Fuck.
13
00:03:49,044 --> 00:03:51,797
- Hello.
- What the fuck do you want?
14
00:03:52,548 --> 00:03:54,717
- Was that your boyfriend there?
- Yeah.
15
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,261
- What is he like?
- He's an asshole.
16
00:03:57,344 --> 00:03:58,762
What do you care?
17
00:04:00,097 --> 00:04:02,516
What are you doing
for the rest of the night?
18
00:04:02,599 --> 00:04:04,017
What's it to you?
19
00:04:05,018 --> 00:04:08,147
Do you want to come back to my flat
for some coke and some sex?
20
00:04:11,149 --> 00:04:12,484
- Okay.
- Great.
21
00:04:20,158 --> 00:04:22,744
- Is that your car, lads?
- Are you joking?
22
00:04:22,828 --> 00:04:26,039
We wouldn't buy a car like that.
It's a fucking woman's car.
23
00:04:31,128 --> 00:04:34,047
What are you doing
hanging around the north side, Jonathan?
24
00:04:34,297 --> 00:04:36,133
You know, this and that.
25
00:04:36,216 --> 00:04:39,344
Bit of shopping. Seeing the sights.
Burying my father.
26
00:04:40,053 --> 00:04:43,431
- Really? He's dead?
- He's dead.
27
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:46,977
- What did he die of?
- He drank himself to death.
28
00:04:48,186 --> 00:04:49,688
Are you heartbroken?
29
00:04:49,771 --> 00:04:52,482
You know,
I'm glad he finally got it together.
30
00:04:52,857 --> 00:04:56,695
So the doctor says to him,
"You've got to stop your drinking.
31
00:04:56,778 --> 00:04:59,823
"Your liver will fucking give in.
You know what I'm saying?"
32
00:04:59,906 --> 00:05:02,784
He goes home and he celebrates
with a bottle of Bushmills.
33
00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:05,370
- Some way to go!
- Are you taking the piss?
34
00:05:05,453 --> 00:05:08,581
- I never joke about death.
- You are taking the piss.
35
00:05:08,998 --> 00:05:10,333
Am I?
36
00:05:32,981 --> 00:05:35,066
Wait here. I'll be back in a second.
37
00:05:44,450 --> 00:05:48,246
- 'Morning.
- You're not as cute as your brother.
38
00:05:50,957 --> 00:05:52,250
Thanks.
39
00:05:54,502 --> 00:05:57,380
- It's a beautiful morning out there, Mikey.
- She's asleep.
40
00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:04,178
It was a great funeral, wasn't it?
41
00:06:07,098 --> 00:06:10,643
- What's the matter? Have you slept?
- Yeah, I went to bed early.
42
00:06:16,065 --> 00:06:18,401
I want the ashes.
I want to take them away.
43
00:06:18,609 --> 00:06:22,446
- What are you talking about?
- I want the fucking urn thingy.
44
00:06:22,530 --> 00:06:24,240
I want to take it home with me.
45
00:06:24,490 --> 00:06:27,368
What are you shitting on about? It's 5:00.
46
00:06:27,451 --> 00:06:29,203
Mikey, she's asleep. Come on.
47
00:06:30,496 --> 00:06:32,665
I'm not going to give you the urn, okay?
48
00:06:33,916 --> 00:06:38,671
Look. Why don't you get
a couple of hours sleep here...
49
00:06:38,754 --> 00:06:41,131
...and we'll all have breakfast then, okay?
50
00:06:42,174 --> 00:06:43,634
Do you have pancakes?
51
00:06:44,593 --> 00:06:46,804
Yes. I will make you some...
52
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,736
- Is he going to be all right?
- Yeah, he'll be fine.
53
00:07:03,987 --> 00:07:07,366
He's been a lot better the last few months.
He'll be grand.
54
00:07:09,159 --> 00:07:10,494
Listen. I'm sorry.
55
00:07:11,161 --> 00:07:13,247
We'll see you. We're going for a spin.
56
00:07:55,914 --> 00:07:58,250
I'm going to have to ask you
to get out here.
57
00:07:58,959 --> 00:07:59,960
What?
58
00:08:00,377 --> 00:08:03,463
I have to ask you to get out of the car.
I'm sorry.
59
00:08:03,922 --> 00:08:05,215
What are you talking about?
60
00:08:05,298 --> 00:08:08,593
I have to ask you to get out of the car now.
I'm sorry. Please.
61
00:08:09,844 --> 00:08:11,346
You're serious.
62
00:09:08,611 --> 00:09:10,363
If you want to kill yourself...
63
00:09:10,446 --> 00:09:13,282
... you can't go wrong
if you drive a convertible car...
64
00:09:13,366 --> 00:09:15,534
... over a cliff at 50 miles an hour.
65
00:09:16,035 --> 00:09:17,536
That's a sure thing.
66
00:09:20,206 --> 00:09:21,916
I broke my baby finger.
67
00:09:23,250 --> 00:09:24,502
No seat belt.
68
00:09:25,419 --> 00:09:29,882
The police said if I had been wearing
my seat belt I would have broken my neck.
69
00:09:42,645 --> 00:09:45,773
Under the threat of a prison sentence
for the stolen car...
70
00:09:45,856 --> 00:09:48,484
... I opted for three months
as an inpatient...
71
00:09:48,692 --> 00:09:50,819
... in a psychiatric hospital.
72
00:10:00,663 --> 00:10:03,457
The good thing about going
into the madhouse now...
73
00:10:03,540 --> 00:10:06,835
... is that my stay would run right over
the Christmas season.
74
00:10:06,919 --> 00:10:09,838
For as long as I can remember,
I wanted to spend Christmas...
75
00:10:09,922 --> 00:10:12,091
... in a suburban mental institution.
76
00:10:14,635 --> 00:10:17,346
The group session you'll be attending
is a small one.
77
00:10:17,429 --> 00:10:20,516
It's made up of four people
about the same age as yourself.
78
00:10:21,308 --> 00:10:25,979
Most of them have been with us
a month or so. They're doing quite well.
79
00:10:27,314 --> 00:10:30,817
I'm sure you'll all get on very well.
Here's your room.
80
00:10:44,289 --> 00:10:45,832
Well, I'll take it.
81
00:10:49,044 --> 00:10:52,672
There's a special room for patients
called the recreation room.
82
00:10:52,881 --> 00:10:57,344
You've got your Velcro-tipped darts,
cards, the telly...
83
00:10:57,844 --> 00:11:01,431
... and a kettle that stops boiling
when the water is lukewarm...
84
00:11:01,515 --> 00:11:05,685
... so you can't kill yourself
by pouring boiling water on your head.
85
00:11:07,395 --> 00:11:09,064
Look at that animal.
86
00:11:12,484 --> 00:11:14,819
Yeah, he's nice.
87
00:11:15,737 --> 00:11:17,572
I had a cat once.
88
00:11:19,115 --> 00:11:23,119
But it got its head stuck in a tin of cat food
I'd left on the counter.
89
00:11:24,996 --> 00:11:29,083
It was stuck for 10 hours
by the time I'd come back.
90
00:11:31,377 --> 00:11:32,504
I'm sorry.
91
00:11:33,463 --> 00:11:35,548
Must have been horrible for him.
92
00:11:37,133 --> 00:11:39,260
All that time in the dark...
93
00:11:40,470 --> 00:11:45,266
...trying to breathe, bumping into walls.
94
00:11:47,936 --> 00:11:49,479
That's sad.
95
00:11:52,273 --> 00:11:54,108
But he's okay now.
96
00:11:55,276 --> 00:11:58,279
Just a little edgy, but he's fine.
97
00:12:01,157 --> 00:12:03,367
Okay. I'll see you later.
98
00:12:11,709 --> 00:12:13,085
What's that for, lads?
99
00:12:19,175 --> 00:12:20,509
Thanks.
100
00:12:38,819 --> 00:12:40,529
You don't feel like talking?
101
00:12:43,157 --> 00:12:44,200
Okay.
102
00:12:47,077 --> 00:12:48,662
We'll leave it for today.
103
00:12:50,664 --> 00:12:55,544
My therapy sessions are at 12:00
every Tuesday and Thursday in Room 13.
104
00:12:57,254 --> 00:12:59,214
You're required to attend.
105
00:13:04,261 --> 00:13:06,847
I've been through your file this morning.
106
00:13:09,099 --> 00:13:10,809
I'm sorry about your father.
107
00:14:03,487 --> 00:14:07,949
You're woken at 7:30 sharp.
A good hour after you got to sleep.
108
00:14:09,868 --> 00:14:12,621
Excuse me. Why are you dressed like that?
109
00:14:13,455 --> 00:14:15,624
- What?
- Why are you dressed like that?
110
00:14:16,333 --> 00:14:17,542
What are you talking about?
111
00:14:17,626 --> 00:14:21,129
You're an inpatient, aren't you?
No civvies. P.J. s only.
112
00:14:30,889 --> 00:14:32,265
I'll have your clothes.
113
00:14:32,932 --> 00:14:36,394
There is nothing as comfortable
as wearing secondhand pajamas...
114
00:14:36,478 --> 00:14:39,564
... that previously belonged
to a very short person.
115
00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:58,750
Excuse me.
Is this the way to Dr. Figure's office?
116
00:14:58,833 --> 00:15:02,045
You're in the right direction.
Head through those blue doors.
117
00:15:02,128 --> 00:15:05,214
He's at the end of the corridor
on the second floor. Goodbye.
118
00:15:06,632 --> 00:15:08,760
- Hello.
- Hello.
119
00:15:11,512 --> 00:15:13,055
Are you two patients here?
120
00:15:15,224 --> 00:15:18,936
- No. We're doctors.
- Okay. I'll see you.
121
00:15:21,689 --> 00:15:24,358
- I like your slippers.
- Thanks.
122
00:15:26,068 --> 00:15:27,320
Do they bite?
123
00:15:28,529 --> 00:15:32,283
I don't know. Why don't you put
your hand down there and find out?
124
00:15:33,159 --> 00:15:34,493
Well, they're nice.
125
00:15:36,746 --> 00:15:38,831
Do you want a game of pool sometime?
126
00:15:38,914 --> 00:15:40,958
- When?
- Whenever.
127
00:15:43,085 --> 00:15:45,254
- I don't play pool.
- I'll play you.
128
00:15:47,006 --> 00:15:50,092
Yeah? I was actually more interested...
129
00:15:50,176 --> 00:15:52,845
...in having a game of pool
with the young lady here.
130
00:15:52,928 --> 00:15:55,973
- No offense.
- Fuck you.
131
00:15:59,768 --> 00:16:01,520
How about table tennis?
132
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:04,732
Can I give you the telephone number
of my room?
133
00:16:05,608 --> 00:16:06,650
No.
134
00:16:15,743 --> 00:16:16,785
Come in.
135
00:16:20,664 --> 00:16:23,417
I want to talk
about the whole pajamas thing.
136
00:16:23,625 --> 00:16:24,793
What's the problem?
137
00:16:24,877 --> 00:16:28,464
The problem is I've been forced
to wear pajamas in the middle of the day.
138
00:16:28,547 --> 00:16:32,009
It's health board regulations,
to distinguish you from day patients.
139
00:16:32,176 --> 00:16:34,595
It's fucking ridiculous.
They took my clothes.
140
00:16:34,678 --> 00:16:36,930
They're too small. I look like an idiot.
141
00:16:38,015 --> 00:16:39,474
You look fine, Jonathan.
142
00:16:40,434 --> 00:16:41,852
Everyone is wearing them.
143
00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:47,441
We can look at these sheets in a moment.
144
00:16:47,649 --> 00:16:51,820
So, therapy sessions.
Three times a week at 2:00.
145
00:16:51,903 --> 00:16:53,947
This must be the nutcase class, is it?
146
00:16:54,031 --> 00:16:56,283
Come in. Grab a seat.
We're getting started.
147
00:16:56,366 --> 00:16:58,702
Fantastic.
I haven't missed anything, have I?
148
00:16:58,994 --> 00:17:02,038
This is Jonathan Breech, everyone.
He's joining our group.
149
00:17:02,664 --> 00:17:05,250
So, why don't you all introduce yourselves?
150
00:17:06,877 --> 00:17:09,421
- Rachel.
- Toby.
151
00:17:10,672 --> 00:17:12,757
That's Leslie and...
152
00:17:14,134 --> 00:17:15,176
...Nick.
153
00:17:16,303 --> 00:17:19,472
- No, you haven't missed anything.
- Well, that's good news.
154
00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:26,730
Yeah, my name is Jonathan Breech,
and I'm 19 years of age.
155
00:17:26,813 --> 00:17:30,483
And I'm really looking forward
to the next few weeks...
156
00:17:30,567 --> 00:17:32,944
...to all I learn about everyone.
157
00:17:33,111 --> 00:17:36,531
But more importantly,
about myself and my own problems.
158
00:17:38,616 --> 00:17:40,452
Thanks. Next?
159
00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:46,040
We've all been together here as a group
for a few weeks now...
160
00:17:46,124 --> 00:17:48,668
...and we've been sharing
our thoughts, so...
161
00:17:49,627 --> 00:17:52,005
Let me just ask you
how you feel at the moment...
162
00:17:52,088 --> 00:17:56,593
...and whether there's anything
that you feel you want to tell us.
163
00:17:58,344 --> 00:17:59,554
She's cute.
164
00:18:01,431 --> 00:18:03,099
Do you have a boyfriend?
165
00:18:05,685 --> 00:18:07,103
That'll be a "no," then.
166
00:18:11,107 --> 00:18:14,861
Okay. Let's just look
at this list then, shall we?
167
00:18:15,403 --> 00:18:18,072
On your sheets,
you'll see a list of situations...
168
00:18:18,156 --> 00:18:21,659
...that some people find difficult,
things we're somewhat afraid of.
169
00:18:23,244 --> 00:18:26,914
I don't know about you.
Doctor, I don't know about him.
170
00:18:27,832 --> 00:18:31,252
- It's okay, Nick. He's a patient.
- I wouldn't trust him.
171
00:18:32,587 --> 00:18:34,338
It's fine. Fine.
172
00:18:35,881 --> 00:18:39,176
What I want you to do
is to tick off any of these items here...
173
00:18:39,260 --> 00:18:41,012
...that particularly trouble you.
174
00:18:41,304 --> 00:18:42,346
Excuse me.
175
00:18:43,639 --> 00:18:45,975
Filling out forms really scares me.
176
00:18:48,018 --> 00:18:51,355
That's okay, Toby. You can just leave it.
It's not that important.
177
00:18:51,439 --> 00:18:53,566
No, I was joking.
178
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:56,944
- You're funny.
- Thanks, Doctor.
179
00:18:59,321 --> 00:19:01,115
Actually, it was quite funny.
180
00:19:01,699 --> 00:19:04,034
All right. I'm out of here. See you.
181
00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:08,122
You're not going to help yourself
by running away, Jonathan.
182
00:19:10,249 --> 00:19:14,378
No, you know, you're right, Doctor, no.
183
00:19:15,129 --> 00:19:17,172
Why don't you show us how it's done?
184
00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:20,300
Tell us a bit about yourself.
What scares you?
185
00:19:21,802 --> 00:19:25,055
I want to know if there's anything
in particular that worries you.
186
00:19:25,139 --> 00:19:29,184
I'd be happy to go through it with you
sometime if you're really interested, but...
187
00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:32,604
...we're not here to talk about me.
You know what I mean?
188
00:19:32,688 --> 00:19:35,357
- Sounds like denial to me.
- No, it's not denial.
189
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:37,818
- Now you sound angry.
- I'm not angry either.
190
00:19:37,901 --> 00:19:39,444
Sometimes it's good to be angry.
191
00:19:39,528 --> 00:19:42,614
I don't think it's
an appropriate conversation for the group.
192
00:19:42,698 --> 00:19:45,492
Fine. If you don't feel comfortable
talking about it.
193
00:19:45,617 --> 00:19:47,911
But I believe you said I was running away.
194
00:19:47,995 --> 00:19:51,456
Yes, and I think that's what
we should be addressing, if anything.
195
00:19:51,540 --> 00:19:54,668
You're trying to deflect
the whole discussion onto my problems.
196
00:19:54,751 --> 00:19:57,379
And now you sound paranoid,
like Nick there.
197
00:19:59,047 --> 00:20:03,969
- What did you say about me?
- I said nothing. How did you hear that?
198
00:20:04,511 --> 00:20:05,971
I hear everything.
199
00:20:07,931 --> 00:20:10,600
Don't you be talking about me
behind my back.
200
00:20:11,351 --> 00:20:13,061
I have enough on my plate!
201
00:20:16,523 --> 00:20:20,694
This has been a wonderful session for me.
I've learned loads about everyone...
202
00:20:20,777 --> 00:20:23,572
...and I'm almost ready
for the outside world again.
203
00:20:23,655 --> 00:20:26,199
So, thanks, Doc. Same time tomorrow.
204
00:20:28,201 --> 00:20:29,286
I'll see you.
205
00:20:55,478 --> 00:20:57,897
You think I'm cute? You think I'm cute?
206
00:20:59,482 --> 00:21:01,609
- Don't call me cute.
- But you are cute.
207
00:21:01,734 --> 00:21:04,028
- You're cute.
- You think I'm cute now?
208
00:21:06,656 --> 00:21:10,827
What? You want to play?
Come on. Now you're fighting.
209
00:21:12,537 --> 00:21:14,122
You think you're so tough.
210
00:22:19,228 --> 00:22:20,813
Do you think I'm cute now?
211
00:22:26,819 --> 00:22:30,197
I have to go back to therapy.
I'll see you later.
212
00:22:42,876 --> 00:22:44,670
You like that Rachel one, do you?
213
00:22:46,463 --> 00:22:47,714
I don't know.
214
00:22:47,798 --> 00:22:49,424
She's beautiful, isn't she?
215
00:22:51,802 --> 00:22:54,805
She's very complicated.
Anyway, I'll see you around.
216
00:23:32,634 --> 00:23:36,012
- Does she play all the time?
- Pretty much.
217
00:23:37,305 --> 00:23:39,307
That's the thing about these places.
218
00:23:39,391 --> 00:23:43,395
You think you're doing something noble
by encouraging her to play the piano.
219
00:23:43,645 --> 00:23:47,690
When she doesn't end up getting better,
you stick her in front of it all day.
220
00:23:48,900 --> 00:23:52,153
Then you forget about her.
How long has she been here for?
221
00:23:52,695 --> 00:23:54,114
Two years.
222
00:23:54,781 --> 00:23:59,202
- Two years. The road to recovery?
- Some people just don't get better.
223
00:24:00,078 --> 00:24:01,996
That's very frank of you, Doctor.
224
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:05,458
The board of directors won't be pleased
to hear you admitting that.
225
00:24:05,541 --> 00:24:07,961
And tell me,
do you see me getting any better?
226
00:24:11,381 --> 00:24:13,049
You're more talkative today.
227
00:24:13,132 --> 00:24:18,221
I'm just fucking bored with this place.
If we weren't mad to begin with...
228
00:24:21,432 --> 00:24:23,768
So what's troubling you, Jonathan?
229
00:24:23,851 --> 00:24:26,854
That's a real standard textbook question,
isn't it, Doc?
230
00:24:26,938 --> 00:24:29,398
- Is it?
- When you're a psychiatrist...
231
00:24:29,482 --> 00:24:33,069
...who wears corduroy pants
and that jumper and no tie...
232
00:24:33,152 --> 00:24:35,404
...and drives an old Saab. Is that yours?
233
00:24:35,488 --> 00:24:37,490
- Yeah.
- The old Saab.
234
00:24:38,074 --> 00:24:40,743
You expect something
a little more original than:
235
00:24:40,826 --> 00:24:42,870
"What's troubling you, Jonathan?"
236
00:24:43,287 --> 00:24:46,457
- Do you?
- I thought you'd be the laid-back...
237
00:24:46,540 --> 00:24:49,377
...social worker type
who'd offer me cigarettes.
238
00:24:50,002 --> 00:24:52,713
Because you're very laid-back.
Very Robin Williams.
239
00:24:53,089 --> 00:24:56,175
I thought that we'd be bonding
and hugging and stuff.
240
00:25:01,806 --> 00:25:05,392
- You want to talk about your father?
- You want to talk about yours?
241
00:25:07,103 --> 00:25:10,147
What would you do if you were allowed
home for the afternoon?
242
00:25:10,231 --> 00:25:14,193
Get a decent cup of coffee,
then chop my head off with a chain saw.
243
00:25:15,653 --> 00:25:16,695
Okay.
244
00:25:20,032 --> 00:25:22,493
Just one thing.
I wanted to propose something.
245
00:25:22,952 --> 00:25:25,287
It's like a pledge
between doctor and patient.
246
00:25:26,622 --> 00:25:29,625
We nominate a day,
like three weeks from now...
247
00:25:29,708 --> 00:25:31,126
...like New Year's Day...
248
00:25:31,210 --> 00:25:34,421
...and you mustn't harm yourself
until that day.
249
00:25:34,963 --> 00:25:38,092
You have to stick to it.
What do you think about that?
250
00:25:38,467 --> 00:25:41,303
Yeah, I think it's a fucking ridiculous idea.
251
00:25:41,553 --> 00:25:43,680
- It's been known to work.
- It won't work.
252
00:25:43,764 --> 00:25:48,852
- Might. Why don't you think about it?
- Okay, hang on. I've thought about it.
253
00:25:49,436 --> 00:25:52,397
Fuck, you made a good breakthrough.
Well done, Doc.
254
00:25:52,481 --> 00:25:55,234
Okay, we'll talk about it more
after the session.
255
00:25:56,109 --> 00:25:59,404
You've given me the will to live,
and I want to thank you for that.
256
00:25:59,780 --> 00:26:04,242
After that, I'll show you the benefits
of being more sparing with your sarcasm.
257
00:26:04,576 --> 00:26:06,828
- Okay? See you.
- Fuck you.
258
00:26:09,623 --> 00:26:11,875
So let me tell you about this pledge thing.
259
00:26:11,958 --> 00:26:14,878
See, Dr. Figure was
a "no medication" type of guy.
260
00:26:15,087 --> 00:26:19,216
And all the hard-core suicidals in his group,
now including myself...
261
00:26:19,299 --> 00:26:22,761
... had agreed not to kill
or hang themselves before January 1.
262
00:26:23,887 --> 00:26:28,725
Can you imagine someone dead hanging
from the light fixture in their room...
263
00:26:28,808 --> 00:26:32,103
... thinking, "If my doctor finds out
about this, I'm fucked"?
264
00:26:33,772 --> 00:26:36,107
You did get privileges
if you signed it though.
265
00:26:36,191 --> 00:26:38,652
Going to the shops
or to the pub across the road.
266
00:26:38,735 --> 00:26:42,572
Not that I needed that because
Toby had been slipping out for weeks.
267
00:26:42,656 --> 00:26:45,575
So I promised to buy him a drink,
and he took me with him.
268
00:27:04,511 --> 00:27:06,221
Hang on a second.
269
00:27:19,442 --> 00:27:22,695
- Cheers.
- Let's get a seat.
270
00:27:27,909 --> 00:27:29,494
You spilled my drink.
271
00:27:30,995 --> 00:27:36,167
- It was an accident, all right?
- Yeah, but you could apologize, you know.
272
00:27:37,543 --> 00:27:38,753
Not tonight, kids.
273
00:27:43,424 --> 00:27:45,343
Fucking unbelievable.
274
00:27:50,598 --> 00:27:52,350
All right, boys.
275
00:27:56,312 --> 00:27:58,022
Lads, lads, lads.
276
00:27:58,272 --> 00:28:03,277
Do you remember when you were
coming back from the ladies' there...
277
00:28:03,778 --> 00:28:06,781
...and you bumped into my buddy here,
you know?
278
00:28:06,989 --> 00:28:10,576
And he dropped his drink,
and he didn't get to drink any of it.
279
00:28:11,035 --> 00:28:13,579
It would be a gas if you said sorry to him.
280
00:28:14,455 --> 00:28:18,792
You see, that was an accident, you know?
I mean, call the police.
281
00:28:19,210 --> 00:28:21,921
It doesn't seem to be bothering
your girlfriend there.
282
00:28:22,004 --> 00:28:24,673
So why the fuck is it bothering you?
283
00:28:29,386 --> 00:28:31,180
A little fucking spanner.
284
00:28:32,931 --> 00:28:37,644
- No, lads, you're right. I'll get another one.
- We'll pay for it, okay? It's fine.
285
00:28:37,728 --> 00:28:39,813
- Our pleasures.
- Have a good night.
286
00:28:39,938 --> 00:28:40,898
Take care.
287
00:28:41,148 --> 00:28:45,235
- No hard feelings, okay?
- No worries, man. Take care. All the best.
288
00:29:00,792 --> 00:29:04,171
Fuck! You fucking punks! Bugger you!
289
00:29:12,012 --> 00:29:15,307
- I got a fucking stitch.
- A stitch is okay. Keep going.
290
00:29:16,641 --> 00:29:19,728
But these fellows,
they're very bad at chasing.
291
00:29:22,105 --> 00:29:23,815
Let's go over here.
292
00:30:00,268 --> 00:30:04,689
- So why are you at the sessions, Toby?
- Now you want to talk serious.
293
00:30:05,815 --> 00:30:07,317
Okay, fuck it.
294
00:30:10,028 --> 00:30:12,155
I killed my brother in a car accident.
295
00:30:17,869 --> 00:30:19,120
How about you?
296
00:30:21,247 --> 00:30:22,498
I don't know.
297
00:30:23,833 --> 00:30:26,753
I've never been properly diagnosed,
you know.
298
00:30:28,212 --> 00:30:31,007
I did drive a car off a cliff
a couple of weeks back.
299
00:30:31,215 --> 00:30:32,592
- Fuck off.
- Yeah.
300
00:30:33,384 --> 00:30:37,430
Are you serious?
You mean, like totally over a cliff?
301
00:30:38,389 --> 00:30:41,601
And you survived? What was it like?
302
00:30:42,226 --> 00:30:45,855
For the first five seconds,
it was fairly interesting.
303
00:30:46,439 --> 00:30:49,358
Fucking "A," I'd say so. That's brilliant.
304
00:30:50,026 --> 00:30:55,114
Well done. I've got to try that
after my pledge date.
305
00:31:02,038 --> 00:31:06,834
- For fuck's sake!
- Come here, you pair of fucking spanners!
306
00:31:06,917 --> 00:31:09,545
We only want to have a word with you.
307
00:31:39,491 --> 00:31:41,702
- Hi.
- Hi, there.
308
00:31:42,995 --> 00:31:46,206
What are you doing here?
How did you get out of your ward?
309
00:31:47,249 --> 00:31:48,917
Aren't you happy to see me?
310
00:31:53,464 --> 00:31:56,758
- So, where were you?
- I was out with Toby.
311
00:31:59,928 --> 00:32:03,307
- What do you think of him?
- I like him. He's a very nice guy.
312
00:32:04,600 --> 00:32:07,352
- Did you have a thing with him?
- Toby?
313
00:32:09,771 --> 00:32:10,897
He's sweet.
314
00:32:12,024 --> 00:32:13,692
You didn't answer my question.
315
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:19,239
I don't know.
Toby is hard to read, you know.
316
00:32:20,532 --> 00:32:23,160
Sometimes I think he likes me.
I don't know.
317
00:32:24,619 --> 00:32:26,788
What about you? What do you think?
318
00:32:34,754 --> 00:32:38,425
- Was your father in today?
- Yeah. How did you know?
319
00:32:39,092 --> 00:32:41,678
- Did he admit you here?
- Yeah.
320
00:32:43,597 --> 00:32:44,723
So he's Irish.
321
00:32:46,224 --> 00:32:48,518
Yeah, he's Irish. My mom was American.
322
00:32:49,686 --> 00:32:51,896
- And do you live in America?
- I did.
323
00:32:52,397 --> 00:32:54,316
I moved here six months ago.
324
00:32:54,733 --> 00:32:56,693
- And where's Mom?
- She's dead.
325
00:32:58,236 --> 00:32:59,821
I'm sorry.
326
00:33:01,573 --> 00:33:04,409
Why are you standing over there?
Come and sit down.
327
00:33:17,338 --> 00:33:19,257
So are you doing that pledge thing?
328
00:33:20,049 --> 00:33:22,886
- Yeah. Are you?
- Yeah. Toby, too.
329
00:33:23,261 --> 00:33:25,972
Yeah, New Year's Day.
It's a great idea, I think.
330
00:33:27,223 --> 00:33:29,100
- I like it.
- Really?
331
00:33:30,435 --> 00:33:33,271
I don't know.
Gives me something to think about.
332
00:33:39,068 --> 00:33:42,864
So you tried to kill yourself.
Why did you want to die?
333
00:33:44,073 --> 00:33:45,408
I don't want to die.
334
00:33:47,243 --> 00:33:48,703
I don't want to be alive.
335
00:33:51,581 --> 00:33:53,124
Are you afraid of dying?
336
00:33:54,500 --> 00:33:57,295
Not for the few seconds
it takes to kill yourself.
337
00:34:09,307 --> 00:34:10,725
Lie on top of me.
338
00:34:11,726 --> 00:34:15,813
Leave your pants on, don't ask questions,
and no exchange of bodily fluids.
339
00:34:18,649 --> 00:34:20,359
You can take off your shirt.
340
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:57,688
Don't stop. Don't stop.
341
00:34:58,230 --> 00:35:01,191
I'm just fucking wriggling, really.
342
00:35:01,275 --> 00:35:04,486
- Whatever it is, don't stop.
- Okay. I won't stop.
343
00:35:21,295 --> 00:35:22,671
Oh, God!
344
00:35:49,906 --> 00:35:51,866
What the fuck is the matter with you?
345
00:36:17,267 --> 00:36:18,810
You're just...
346
00:36:45,461 --> 00:36:47,880
"I'm singin' in the rain
347
00:36:49,173 --> 00:36:52,468
"Just singin' in the rain
348
00:36:52,552 --> 00:36:55,930
"What a glorious feeling
349
00:36:56,013 --> 00:36:58,683
"I'm happy again
350
00:37:00,101 --> 00:37:02,186
"I'm laughing at clouds"
351
00:37:02,353 --> 00:37:04,814
Have you got tickets
for the Christmas raffle?
352
00:37:04,897 --> 00:37:05,773
No.
353
00:37:05,856 --> 00:37:08,859
- Do you know where I can get them?
- No.
354
00:37:08,943 --> 00:37:10,736
That's not much good to me.
355
00:37:12,738 --> 00:37:15,533
"Let the stormy clouds chase
356
00:37:16,242 --> 00:37:19,537
"Everyone from the place
357
00:37:20,746 --> 00:37:26,127
"Come on with the rain
I've a smile on my face
358
00:37:26,794 --> 00:37:29,630
"I'll walk down the lane
359
00:37:30,297 --> 00:37:32,842
"With a happy refrain
360
00:37:33,801 --> 00:37:38,556
"Just singin' in the rain"
361
00:37:39,181 --> 00:37:42,810
It was at that moment
that I decided to keep the pledge.
362
00:37:44,144 --> 00:37:45,771
Don't ask me why.
363
00:38:03,163 --> 00:38:05,582
Once every two weeks, there's bowling.
364
00:38:05,666 --> 00:38:08,794
That's where we're encouraged to mix
with the rest of society...
365
00:38:08,877 --> 00:38:10,879
... and behave like normal people.
366
00:38:11,088 --> 00:38:15,676
All right, lads. Get your shoes. Let's go.
Be sure you get the right sizes.
367
00:38:29,314 --> 00:38:31,483
You're very bad at bowling, Toby.
368
00:38:32,109 --> 00:38:36,029
- We should do something this weekend.
- Like what? Have a darts championship?
369
00:38:36,113 --> 00:38:40,367
I've had enough of fucking broken
rubber darts. I mean, do something.
370
00:38:42,786 --> 00:38:44,871
Driving Miss Daisy is on the telly.
371
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:47,999
We can invite some of the lunatics
from the high-risk ward.
372
00:38:48,083 --> 00:38:49,376
It could be a laugh.
373
00:38:49,459 --> 00:38:52,629
How do you ever hear
with that stuff blaring in your ears?
374
00:38:52,712 --> 00:38:55,674
Shut up. I was starting to like you.
Don't blow it.
375
00:38:55,757 --> 00:38:58,885
But we should do something.
I mean, go drinking...
376
00:38:59,094 --> 00:39:01,972
...or take some drugs.
- What if we get caught?
377
00:39:02,097 --> 00:39:05,016
If we get caught, fuck it.
We just lose a few privileges.
378
00:39:05,183 --> 00:39:08,228
We'll round up a load of loonies
and head off to the country.
379
00:39:08,311 --> 00:39:10,063
We could have a party in my flat.
380
00:39:10,146 --> 00:39:12,732
- Where do we get the people?
- These are our people.
381
00:39:12,816 --> 00:39:15,151
We'd hand out the address
to lots of day patients.
382
00:39:15,235 --> 00:39:17,654
Say there's free gargle.
They bring their mates.
383
00:39:17,737 --> 00:39:20,573
Everyone wants to do something
on New Year's Eve.
384
00:39:20,657 --> 00:39:21,741
Fuck!
385
00:39:23,660 --> 00:39:27,288
No, I'm telling you.
The whole thing is fucking wanks and gays.
386
00:39:27,997 --> 00:39:31,709
- Bowling is shite.
- You shut the fuck up! I'm on the edge.
387
00:39:41,469 --> 00:39:43,262
Wednesdays are visiting days.
388
00:39:43,346 --> 00:39:46,307
I really look forward to them
because my brother comes in.
389
00:39:46,891 --> 00:39:48,643
And he's fantastic.
390
00:40:14,835 --> 00:40:17,672
I saw you with your brother today
in the garden.
391
00:40:18,673 --> 00:40:21,175
What kind of a relationship
do you have with him?
392
00:40:24,011 --> 00:40:27,598
Did you ever see that Marx Brothers sketch
where Chico was asked:
393
00:40:28,182 --> 00:40:32,853
"You love your brother, don't you?"
And he says, "No, but I'm used to him."
394
00:40:35,231 --> 00:40:38,484
- I like the Marx Brothers.
- I like the Marx Brothers, too.
395
00:40:39,860 --> 00:40:42,947
So you have a history of male depression
in your family.
396
00:40:43,572 --> 00:40:46,242
He's been giving you the old rundown,
has he?
397
00:40:46,450 --> 00:40:48,285
He's great, that Mikey.
398
00:40:48,911 --> 00:40:51,872
I have a history of male depression
in my family. So what?
399
00:40:51,956 --> 00:40:53,999
How do you think it's affected you?
400
00:40:54,750 --> 00:40:56,961
Your mother died when you were 10.
401
00:40:57,670 --> 00:41:00,297
Do you think
that's why your father killed himself?
402
00:41:01,548 --> 00:41:04,259
Or was he suffering
from hereditary depression?
403
00:41:04,343 --> 00:41:08,013
I don't know. I suppose
after all these years of loneliness...
404
00:41:08,097 --> 00:41:11,100
...he finally saw the light,
call it what you want.
405
00:41:11,308 --> 00:41:13,602
- I'm proud of him.
- What about yourself?
406
00:41:13,769 --> 00:41:15,062
On the road.
407
00:41:16,438 --> 00:41:17,898
Did you see the light?
408
00:41:17,981 --> 00:41:21,068
I don't want to talk about what you see
at a moment like that.
409
00:41:21,985 --> 00:41:24,071
It would scare the wits out of you.
410
00:41:24,780 --> 00:41:28,492
If I could describe it,
if I could do justice to it...
411
00:41:29,785 --> 00:41:32,079
...we'd all be jumping out the windows.
412
00:41:33,747 --> 00:41:37,668
Up until recently,
cutting yourself was enough.
413
00:41:38,168 --> 00:41:41,463
That's just a matter of letting
a little air out of the tires.
414
00:41:41,671 --> 00:41:43,340
Doesn't work anymore though.
415
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:47,677
I can talk about this
until the cows come home, Doctor.
416
00:41:48,095 --> 00:41:51,515
I know more about the business of suicide
in my baby finger...
417
00:41:51,598 --> 00:41:54,851
...than you do in all your years of training
and Freud reading.
418
00:41:54,935 --> 00:41:57,020
I guaran-fucking-tee you that.
419
00:41:58,271 --> 00:41:59,814
I know you do.
420
00:42:12,994 --> 00:42:16,748
Have you ever heard of people,
seeing their own blood and then...
421
00:42:17,707 --> 00:42:19,125
...getting excited?
422
00:42:19,376 --> 00:42:21,544
- You mean sexually?
- Yeah.
423
00:42:21,920 --> 00:42:23,463
Yes, I've heard of it.
424
00:42:23,671 --> 00:42:25,006
Is it for real?
425
00:42:26,549 --> 00:42:27,926
Yes, it's very real.
426
00:42:30,929 --> 00:42:32,847
Why are you interested in it?
427
00:42:37,268 --> 00:42:38,645
Be careful, Jonathan.
428
00:42:40,188 --> 00:42:41,356
What do you mean?
429
00:42:42,440 --> 00:42:43,691
What I say.
430
00:42:48,905 --> 00:42:52,950
Doctors discourage relationships
between suicidal patients in hospital.
431
00:42:53,826 --> 00:42:56,329
I mean,
you wouldn't fucking blame them, but...
432
00:42:56,496 --> 00:42:58,706
Well, they go along with them
up to a point.
433
00:42:58,790 --> 00:43:01,626
But once either party
becomes seriously attached...
434
00:43:01,709 --> 00:43:05,505
... they become worried, because
when the inevitable breakup comes...
435
00:43:05,922 --> 00:43:08,424
... the person left behind
is in twice the danger.
436
00:43:08,925 --> 00:43:12,011
So you have to be more careful
with people inside...
437
00:43:12,136 --> 00:43:15,473
... because they take you more seriously
than people on the outside.
438
00:43:15,932 --> 00:43:18,684
You can't fuck around
the way you normally do.
439
00:43:19,185 --> 00:43:20,311
Guess who?
440
00:43:21,228 --> 00:43:25,399
It's you. Gosh!
You know, I'm so happy to see you.
441
00:43:25,566 --> 00:43:27,902
I haven't stopped thinking
about you all day.
442
00:43:31,155 --> 00:43:36,243
So is it okay if I walk with you
through these beautiful gardens of ours?
443
00:43:37,411 --> 00:43:38,871
Sure. Why not?
444
00:43:43,876 --> 00:43:46,170
- How's the arm?
- Fine.
445
00:43:46,879 --> 00:43:48,964
- It's all bandaged up.
- Good.
446
00:43:49,715 --> 00:43:52,760
- And how's your hand?
- What about my hand?
447
00:43:52,927 --> 00:43:55,512
It was just that it kept hitting off my face.
448
00:43:55,596 --> 00:43:59,266
- I was just wondering if it was okay.
- Right.
449
00:43:59,934 --> 00:44:04,396
- Yeah, it's fine. How's your face?
- Fine. It's fine.
450
00:44:05,356 --> 00:44:09,193
We should stop talking about our wounds.
That could take all fucking day.
451
00:44:09,276 --> 00:44:13,155
Anyway, it was my ego that was bruised,
not my face.
452
00:44:13,989 --> 00:44:14,823
Why?
453
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:17,659
Why? I don't know why.
454
00:44:20,662 --> 00:44:25,250
There's a girl in the high-security ward
who cuts open her abdomen...
455
00:44:25,334 --> 00:44:27,586
...takes her intestines out
and plays with them.
456
00:44:27,669 --> 00:44:30,964
They stitch her back up.
Week later, she does the same thing.
457
00:44:31,048 --> 00:44:33,967
She's really lovely.
Why don't you go figure her out?
458
00:44:34,051 --> 00:44:36,386
Now, you see, I haven't met her.
459
00:44:36,470 --> 00:44:39,848
And she didn't come and slap me
out of the blue for no reason.
460
00:44:39,973 --> 00:44:43,101
- I don't need your help.
- I'm not trying to help you.
461
00:44:44,853 --> 00:44:46,438
Just take care of yourself.
462
00:44:47,689 --> 00:44:49,608
You know what? Fuck it.
463
00:44:49,858 --> 00:44:53,278
You want to come up to my room
for some autoerotic asphyxiation?
464
00:44:54,404 --> 00:44:57,699
- Yeah? Now?
- Yeah. I got some hook-eye screws.
465
00:44:57,783 --> 00:45:00,702
We could hang ourselves,
I could smack you around a bit.
466
00:45:00,785 --> 00:45:03,496
- Give you a good time.
- That's a fabulous idea.
467
00:45:03,580 --> 00:45:06,708
- That'd be fun.
- Maybe tomorrow. I can't wait.
468
00:45:07,834 --> 00:45:10,211
Do you want to know
what I think we should do?
469
00:45:13,048 --> 00:45:15,216
- You want to hear it?
- Yeah. Is it dirty?
470
00:45:15,300 --> 00:45:17,010
It's disgusting.
471
00:45:19,554 --> 00:45:22,682
I think we should go sometime
and get some ice creams.
472
00:45:25,643 --> 00:45:28,646
- Just the two of us. Get some fresh air.
- Sure. Sure.
473
00:45:28,730 --> 00:45:32,901
- I'll buy you an ice cream.
- Okay. Call me. I'll be in my room.
474
00:45:38,114 --> 00:45:40,617
I'll be waiting for your call. Call me.
475
00:45:55,923 --> 00:45:59,218
Myself and Toby's breakouts
became a regular weekly thing.
476
00:45:59,302 --> 00:46:01,179
He'd always take me with him.
477
00:46:02,430 --> 00:46:04,682
We both agreed
that a big Christmas party...
478
00:46:04,766 --> 00:46:07,059
... outside the hospital
was an excellent idea.
479
00:46:08,686 --> 00:46:10,980
Toby decided to take a trial run.
480
00:46:13,983 --> 00:46:17,945
He swore that he could hot-wire any car
in under 10 seconds.
481
00:46:26,746 --> 00:46:28,623
It's fucking beautiful, isn't it?
482
00:46:31,000 --> 00:46:33,210
Let me tell you something
about my brother.
483
00:46:36,088 --> 00:46:38,799
He was in the hospital for a month
after the accident.
484
00:46:38,883 --> 00:46:41,385
He was just wasting away.
485
00:46:41,927 --> 00:46:45,097
We all knew he was dying.
He was on a machine and everything.
486
00:46:45,931 --> 00:46:49,852
I think if I'd lost anyone else,
it wouldn't have been so bad.
487
00:46:50,853 --> 00:46:55,733
I think I can handle death
and missing people, and that.
488
00:46:58,319 --> 00:47:01,989
What I don't understand
is that there were a few basic...
489
00:47:02,323 --> 00:47:05,492
...simple things I wished
I could have told him before he went.
490
00:47:06,076 --> 00:47:07,870
Like the fact that I loved him.
491
00:47:09,288 --> 00:47:12,583
And that I never went a day
without thinking about him...
492
00:47:13,292 --> 00:47:15,210
...or talking about him to people.
493
00:47:17,379 --> 00:47:20,048
And since then,
the image that sticks in my head...
494
00:47:20,507 --> 00:47:23,010
...is that over the month in the hospital...
495
00:47:23,927 --> 00:47:27,055
...I couldn't get it together enough
to tell him those things.
496
00:47:29,725 --> 00:47:31,935
I always thought I'd say them in the end.
497
00:47:36,023 --> 00:47:40,277
And one night, the nurse brought him in
a cup of tea and he had a few sips of it.
498
00:47:41,069 --> 00:47:44,197
And I went out to the toilets.
499
00:47:47,492 --> 00:47:49,036
And when I came back in...
500
00:47:51,121 --> 00:47:52,414
...he was a dead man.
501
00:47:58,545 --> 00:48:01,673
All the family and friends around him,
and all the tears and...
502
00:48:06,678 --> 00:48:08,763
My elbow touched off his cup.
503
00:48:11,433 --> 00:48:13,476
And there was still heat in it.
504
00:48:16,980 --> 00:48:20,900
And that, it totally fucked me up,
you know.
505
00:48:23,153 --> 00:48:24,821
I mean, the idea...
506
00:48:28,533 --> 00:48:30,368
It was his tea, you know.
507
00:48:33,121 --> 00:48:35,457
It was his tea, and it was still warm, and...
508
00:48:38,126 --> 00:48:39,794
It had outlived him.
509
00:48:44,465 --> 00:48:46,009
It was his tea.
510
00:48:57,687 --> 00:49:00,481
A plane is coming
into Dublin Airport there.
511
00:49:03,401 --> 00:49:04,777
Full of people.
512
00:49:07,405 --> 00:49:09,157
I wonder if it'll crash now.
513
00:49:15,455 --> 00:49:16,831
Safe and sound.
514
00:49:20,543 --> 00:49:22,253
Fuck, I'm sorry.
515
00:49:22,336 --> 00:49:24,714
I don't know why I'm talking about this.
516
00:49:25,298 --> 00:49:28,259
We'll go back.
It's fucking freezing in here anyway.
517
00:49:53,826 --> 00:49:55,161
Wanks!
518
00:50:04,795 --> 00:50:08,299
Hey, pal, give it up, will you?
You're embarrassing yourself.
519
00:50:08,632 --> 00:50:11,635
I'm getting better, lads.
Don't worry. Wanker.
520
00:50:12,845 --> 00:50:14,722
Are you trying to start a fight?
521
00:50:15,806 --> 00:50:17,141
Chill out, honey.
522
00:50:17,725 --> 00:50:20,519
What are you, a homosexual or something?
523
00:50:22,938 --> 00:50:24,773
No more than you're a dickhead.
524
00:50:25,858 --> 00:50:28,527
You're distracting us,
you northern fuck, you.
525
00:50:28,610 --> 00:50:31,280
We're trying to play here,
and you're fooling around.
526
00:50:31,363 --> 00:50:33,240
You're in my fucking peripherals.
527
00:50:33,323 --> 00:50:35,701
Mind your own business.
He's not bothering you.
528
00:50:35,784 --> 00:50:38,120
Shut the fuck up, you ugly mutt, you.
529
00:50:39,288 --> 00:50:40,914
What did you say to her?
530
00:50:42,958 --> 00:50:44,835
Forget it, Toby. Just bowl.
531
00:50:48,964 --> 00:50:50,549
You're a wise man.
532
00:51:02,102 --> 00:51:06,148
It's a fucking strike!
Did you see that? That strike.
533
00:51:06,731 --> 00:51:09,609
You're going to have to die for that now,
you prick!
534
00:51:11,236 --> 00:51:15,031
What's your problem? Do you want
to fucking get involved in this too?
535
00:51:15,156 --> 00:51:18,660
If you want to get at him, you're going
to have to go through me first.
536
00:51:18,743 --> 00:51:21,788
But bear with me,
while I try and explain something to you.
537
00:51:25,667 --> 00:51:29,421
Come on. Come on.
Give it to me in the fucking neck.
538
00:51:29,921 --> 00:51:32,424
But listen very carefully first before you do.
539
00:51:33,633 --> 00:51:38,054
Whatever you do to me,
I'll have enough energy to come back...
540
00:51:38,138 --> 00:51:39,597
...and get one in at you.
541
00:51:40,682 --> 00:51:44,561
And as sure as I'm standing here,
I don't give a fuck what happens to me.
542
00:51:45,895 --> 00:51:48,064
You'd better kill me with your first shot.
543
00:51:48,148 --> 00:51:51,150
If you don't, I'll come back
and take your fucking head off.
544
00:51:52,694 --> 00:51:55,029
Give it to me in the fucking neck.
Come on.
545
00:51:55,780 --> 00:51:57,323
Come on, you wanker!
546
00:52:01,744 --> 00:52:06,582
Dean, leave it. He's from the hospital.
547
00:52:15,466 --> 00:52:16,801
Yeah.
548
00:52:28,938 --> 00:52:31,691
Jonathan, come here a second.
549
00:52:48,749 --> 00:52:51,919
- That was a close call.
- I suppose.
550
00:52:53,421 --> 00:52:55,005
What if he'd gone for you?
551
00:52:56,549 --> 00:52:58,759
Doctor, he'd have been doing me a favor.
552
00:53:00,219 --> 00:53:01,679
You're trembling.
553
00:53:03,264 --> 00:53:06,183
Do you really believe that,
or are you just saying it?
554
00:53:09,562 --> 00:53:11,021
I felt it at the time.
555
00:53:11,981 --> 00:53:13,148
What about now?
556
00:53:20,864 --> 00:53:23,033
Isn't it a relief to be alive?
557
00:54:27,514 --> 00:54:31,226
- How's it going?
- It's good. How are you?
558
00:54:32,727 --> 00:54:34,020
I'm okay.
559
00:54:36,606 --> 00:54:39,442
- I wrote another poem, you know.
- Yeah?
560
00:54:40,610 --> 00:54:43,154
- I like your poetry.
- Thanks a million.
561
00:54:44,030 --> 00:54:45,990
- Do you want to hear it?
- Yeah.
562
00:54:55,124 --> 00:54:57,126
It's called The Demons.
563
00:55:03,883 --> 00:55:06,052
"Deep within these flesh walls
564
00:55:06,302 --> 00:55:08,596
"A raging monster screams
565
00:55:09,806 --> 00:55:12,016
"The pain is felt when I'm asleep
566
00:55:12,392 --> 00:55:14,310
"And fills my every dreams
567
00:55:15,770 --> 00:55:17,814
"To overcome the demon within
568
00:55:18,272 --> 00:55:20,108
"I found a light that shone
569
00:55:21,150 --> 00:55:23,778
"And called out loud and guided me
570
00:55:24,737 --> 00:55:27,115
"That light inspired me on
571
00:55:28,658 --> 00:55:31,035
"When darkness falls across mine eye
572
00:55:31,911 --> 00:55:33,704
"A light within does shine
573
00:55:34,914 --> 00:55:37,291
"And helps me when the demon screams
574
00:55:37,458 --> 00:55:38,960
"That light to me
575
00:55:40,044 --> 00:55:41,462
"sublime"
576
00:55:44,173 --> 00:55:45,466
That's it.
577
00:55:49,178 --> 00:55:51,430
- What do you think of it?
- I like it.
578
00:55:52,014 --> 00:55:54,433
- It's good.
- It's not bad.
579
00:55:59,897 --> 00:56:01,315
Is it for me?
580
00:56:04,068 --> 00:56:05,778
Not necessarily.
581
00:56:16,664 --> 00:56:19,458
I'm going to the toilets.
I'll see you around.
582
00:56:31,303 --> 00:56:33,180
I didn't really have to go.
583
00:56:40,729 --> 00:56:44,775
I hope I didn't pressure you in the past.
584
00:56:46,777 --> 00:56:48,695
No. I mean...
585
00:56:50,405 --> 00:56:52,449
You're not like that, you know.
586
00:56:54,284 --> 00:56:57,454
You're what my mom
would call "a perfect gentleman."
587
00:57:01,917 --> 00:57:03,043
Come here.
588
00:57:27,984 --> 00:57:29,402
I'll see you around.
589
00:57:41,081 --> 00:57:42,624
- Hi.
- Hi, there.
590
00:57:43,583 --> 00:57:46,378
- Were you out for the day?
- Yeah. I was with my dad.
591
00:57:46,544 --> 00:57:47,796
How is your dad?
592
00:57:49,339 --> 00:57:50,757
What are you doing later?
593
00:57:52,842 --> 00:57:54,594
Think I'll catch a show.
594
00:57:56,429 --> 00:57:59,098
- Do you know where my room is?
- Yes, I do.
595
00:58:10,735 --> 00:58:11,903
How was today?
596
00:58:14,364 --> 00:58:15,406
It was fine.
597
00:58:17,367 --> 00:58:19,202
I didn't enjoy it really.
598
00:58:20,036 --> 00:58:21,746
Your dad, how was he?
599
00:58:23,206 --> 00:58:25,333
I don't know. I don't understand him.
600
00:58:28,211 --> 00:58:30,379
We went home for lunch today.
601
00:58:33,841 --> 00:58:36,219
I haven't been there in ages.
602
00:58:39,388 --> 00:58:40,848
There are these cliffs...
603
00:58:42,350 --> 00:58:44,018
...10 minutes from my house.
604
00:58:45,019 --> 00:58:46,979
Used to go there when I was a kid.
605
00:58:48,981 --> 00:58:53,611
Last time I was there I was 7
and had a picnic with my mom.
606
00:58:57,114 --> 00:58:58,824
It was nice and sunny.
607
00:59:00,785 --> 00:59:03,913
We took a nap on the blanket,
I had my head on her stomach...
608
00:59:03,996 --> 00:59:06,999
...and I could feel it moving up and down
with her breath.
609
00:59:09,168 --> 00:59:12,129
We decided to go home.
610
00:59:13,380 --> 00:59:15,341
She wanted to walk along the cliffs.
611
00:59:18,636 --> 00:59:20,095
I don't know. She just...
612
00:59:24,683 --> 00:59:26,602
...lost her footing.
613
00:59:28,020 --> 00:59:30,564
She just went over.
614
00:59:34,943 --> 00:59:37,446
No sound, no scream.
615
00:59:42,117 --> 00:59:43,577
And I looked over...
616
00:59:43,952 --> 00:59:48,332
...and I could see her on the rocks below,
all curled up like she was taking a nap.
617
00:59:57,883 --> 01:00:01,053
Nowadays I have this dream
that I'm back at the cliff...
618
01:00:02,262 --> 01:00:07,100
...and I'm looking down,
and I can see her curled up...
619
01:00:09,019 --> 01:00:10,896
...still there, sleeping.
620
01:00:14,316 --> 01:00:16,068
And I want to get down to her.
621
01:00:18,070 --> 01:00:19,738
But I can't figure out how.
622
01:00:25,076 --> 01:00:27,621
Then I realize I could just jump.
623
01:00:31,708 --> 01:00:33,501
So I jump.
624
01:00:35,170 --> 01:00:37,172
But it's not like falling. It's...
625
01:00:38,465 --> 01:00:40,300
I just float down.
626
01:00:43,219 --> 01:00:47,682
And then I'm with her,
and I have my head on her stomach.
627
01:00:52,270 --> 01:00:53,897
And I can feel her breathing.
628
01:00:55,690 --> 01:00:56,733
And it's...
629
01:00:58,234 --> 01:01:00,195
It's so warm and nice.
630
01:01:03,656 --> 01:01:07,494
And then everything just fades away.
631
01:01:20,506 --> 01:01:22,467
And where was your dad that day?
632
01:01:25,261 --> 01:01:26,721
I don't know.
633
01:01:28,765 --> 01:01:30,141
I think, work.
634
01:01:35,521 --> 01:01:36,981
He blames himself?
635
01:01:39,358 --> 01:01:40,568
I don't know.
636
01:01:43,863 --> 01:01:47,783
You know, he loved her so much.
637
01:01:50,244 --> 01:01:53,164
A daughter is a poor substitute for a wife.
638
01:01:55,374 --> 01:01:58,085
You couldn't be a poor substitute
for anyone.
639
01:02:01,464 --> 01:02:02,506
Thanks.
640
01:02:05,926 --> 01:02:07,970
It's nice of you to say.
641
01:02:12,016 --> 01:02:15,728
You should go back to your room now.
They do a walk-around at midnight.
642
01:02:21,108 --> 01:02:22,318
I'll see you.
643
01:02:23,068 --> 01:02:24,612
I could talk to you, though.
644
01:02:25,529 --> 01:02:26,697
Yeah?
645
01:02:28,866 --> 01:02:29,867
Good night.
646
01:02:36,290 --> 01:02:38,459
- What does that mean?
- It means:
647
01:02:38,751 --> 01:02:41,337
"Say your prayers and sleep well," in Irish.
648
01:02:41,962 --> 01:02:43,047
It's nice.
649
01:02:43,714 --> 01:02:45,924
My dad used to say that to me every night.
650
01:02:47,259 --> 01:02:48,385
Do you miss him?
651
01:02:49,303 --> 01:02:51,013
I miss him saying that to me.
652
01:02:51,263 --> 01:02:52,347
You miss him.
653
01:02:53,307 --> 01:02:55,934
Not as much as you do,
by the sounds of that dream.
654
01:03:01,815 --> 01:03:03,066
Good night.
655
01:04:09,424 --> 01:04:12,010
All good escape plans
start by acquiring the wheels.
656
01:04:12,093 --> 01:04:14,220
Something fast and discreet.
657
01:04:15,513 --> 01:04:18,474
Rachel suggested her dad's house
as a venue for our party.
658
01:04:18,558 --> 01:04:21,060
He'd be away,
so we'd have the run of the place.
659
01:04:21,477 --> 01:04:23,813
By giving out the address
to the day patients...
660
01:04:23,896 --> 01:04:26,524
... news of the party
would spread like wildfire.
661
01:04:35,074 --> 01:04:38,536
- What's the story? Who we waiting for?
- Our hostess for the evening.
662
01:04:38,619 --> 01:04:40,788
She said she'd bunk out around 10:00.
663
01:05:06,647 --> 01:05:10,109
We spiked the guard's flask
with a cocktail of stolen medication.
664
01:05:11,027 --> 01:05:12,486
Happy New Year.
665
01:06:00,284 --> 01:06:02,286
Come on. Let's go for a downer.
666
01:06:03,829 --> 01:06:05,956
- There's something I want to say.
- Yeah?
667
01:06:06,039 --> 01:06:07,749
I'm totally pissed, so...
668
01:06:08,166 --> 01:06:12,379
Fuck it. I'm just going to say it.
I've regretted not saying things in the past.
669
01:06:13,005 --> 01:06:17,050
I just want to say that,
although we have some shite in common...
670
01:06:18,093 --> 01:06:20,178
...you're not in my ballpark.
671
01:06:21,388 --> 01:06:22,889
That's all I want to say.
672
01:06:23,432 --> 01:06:26,768
- What are you fucking talking about?
- I just wanted to say that.
673
01:06:27,853 --> 01:06:30,021
You're not what people think you are.
674
01:06:30,605 --> 01:06:33,608
I mean, you're not even close. I'm close.
675
01:06:33,984 --> 01:06:38,321
I'm everything they say I am.
I am the genuine fucking article.
676
01:06:39,865 --> 01:06:41,867
I am telling you now.
677
01:06:43,577 --> 01:06:47,873
Don't get fucking cornered
by other people...
678
01:06:48,331 --> 01:06:51,293
...and what they expect you to do,
you know.
679
01:06:54,254 --> 01:06:56,548
- I'm drunk.
- You are.
680
01:06:56,798 --> 01:07:00,468
That's all I've got to say.
You're the fucking man.
681
01:07:01,261 --> 01:07:04,055
You're the fucking man.
Fuck the begrudgers.
682
01:07:04,639 --> 01:07:07,058
- You know, just fuck them.
- Fuck them.
683
01:07:09,978 --> 01:07:11,855
Let's go bring in the New Year.
684
01:07:12,105 --> 01:07:14,482
- You're the fucking man.
- You're the fucking man.
685
01:07:14,566 --> 01:07:15,984
You are the fucking man.
686
01:09:03,132 --> 01:09:05,801
- Why won't you kiss me?
- I am.
687
01:09:13,892 --> 01:09:15,602
Why won't you kiss me properly?
688
01:09:16,937 --> 01:09:18,438
Because I'm unusual.
689
01:09:23,652 --> 01:09:24,945
You don't want me?
690
01:09:25,737 --> 01:09:29,366
Listen to me. I want to make love to you.
691
01:09:30,117 --> 01:09:32,327
I'd just like to start with a proper kiss.
692
01:10:54,325 --> 01:10:56,327
Ten, nine...
693
01:10:57,453 --> 01:10:58,538
...eight...
694
01:10:59,080 --> 01:11:04,293
...seven, six, five, four...
695
01:11:18,599 --> 01:11:21,686
You can never know
what was going through a person's mind...
696
01:11:21,769 --> 01:11:23,145
... at that exact moment.
697
01:11:25,106 --> 01:11:27,358
If they survive, they'll never tell you.
698
01:11:27,817 --> 01:11:31,904
If they succeed, all you can do
is spend the rest of your life guilty...
699
01:11:32,154 --> 01:11:34,949
... because it might have had
something to do with you.
700
01:11:35,491 --> 01:11:38,369
Your only concern can be
for the people they leave behind.
701
01:11:38,619 --> 01:11:40,454
They're the ones to look out for.
702
01:14:02,804 --> 01:14:04,806
And what is Rachel's dad going to do?
703
01:14:06,599 --> 01:14:08,226
I don't know. We'll see.
704
01:14:11,687 --> 01:14:13,564
She's so vulnerable.
705
01:14:22,031 --> 01:14:23,949
What's going to happen to her, Doc?
706
01:14:25,201 --> 01:14:26,869
What's going to happen to you?
707
01:14:31,582 --> 01:14:33,959
I can only help people who are really sick.
708
01:14:36,003 --> 01:14:38,214
Even then, half the time it doesn't work.
709
01:14:41,926 --> 01:14:43,594
Who's going to help you?
710
01:14:57,483 --> 01:14:59,193
What are you looking at?
711
01:15:00,486 --> 01:15:01,779
Nothing.
712
01:15:01,862 --> 01:15:04,573
Are you blind?
You have to be looking at something.
713
01:15:06,867 --> 01:15:08,869
I know what's going on in your mind.
714
01:15:10,245 --> 01:15:11,872
- Do you?
- Yes.
715
01:15:15,125 --> 01:15:18,128
What are you hanging around here for,
standing at windows?
716
01:15:21,089 --> 01:15:25,135
Anyway, this is my window really.
717
01:15:26,011 --> 01:15:27,804
Everyone knows that.
718
01:15:32,684 --> 01:15:34,436
I've been here for years.
719
01:16:03,048 --> 01:16:05,759
Security? There's a young guy,
just stolen a bike.
720
01:16:05,842 --> 01:16:08,637
He'll be heading for the main gate
in a minute or two.
721
01:16:09,846 --> 01:16:11,222
Yeah, a push bike.
722
01:16:13,433 --> 01:16:16,895
He's wearing a green coat and a hat.
723
01:16:21,775 --> 01:16:23,943
Let him through. Okay?
724
01:16:53,139 --> 01:16:54,849
It's beautiful here.
725
01:17:02,482 --> 01:17:04,525
You can't take this all on your own.
726
01:17:08,780 --> 01:17:10,615
So are you all good now?
727
01:17:13,868 --> 01:17:17,079
Too many near-death experiences.
You're beginning to think twice.
728
01:17:36,932 --> 01:17:38,684
Do you want to know the truth?
729
01:17:41,103 --> 01:17:44,774
If it's a matter of life and death
between people like you and me...
730
01:17:47,860 --> 01:17:49,778
...then I want to outlive you.
731
01:17:52,907 --> 01:17:55,159
And I want to see what happens to you...
732
01:17:57,328 --> 01:17:58,787
...because I like you.
733
01:18:01,832 --> 01:18:03,125
I can't.
734
01:18:07,171 --> 01:18:09,381
What if we are still together in a year?
735
01:18:11,717 --> 01:18:12,926
Would we be?
736
01:18:14,845 --> 01:18:16,680
I see it happening.
737
01:18:25,439 --> 01:18:27,274
I don't know.
738
01:18:31,528 --> 01:18:33,238
So, you think you love me?
739
01:18:36,074 --> 01:18:37,326
I know I love you.
59281
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