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1
00:00:02,635 --> 00:00:05,070
[♪]
2
00:01:13,972 --> 00:01:18,643
And one, and two,and three, and four.
3
00:01:18,644 --> 00:01:22,046
And one, and two,and three, and four.
4
00:01:22,047 --> 00:01:25,583
And one, and two,and three, and four.
5
00:01:25,584 --> 00:01:27,852
And rest.
6
00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:31,589
[sighs]
7
00:01:31,590 --> 00:01:35,326
Okay, ladies. Let's takea break while I mix upa jim jupiter spirulina
8
00:01:35,327 --> 00:01:36,795
And wheat-grass shake.
9
00:01:36,796 --> 00:01:38,930
Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.
10
00:01:38,931 --> 00:01:40,965
Mmm. Look
at that sweat
11
00:01:40,966 --> 00:01:43,768
Glistening off
jim jupiter's arms.
12
00:01:43,769 --> 00:01:45,103
Come on, baby,
13
00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:47,171
Mama wants
a salt lick.
14
00:01:51,243 --> 00:01:52,243
I wouldn't mind
15
00:01:52,244 --> 00:01:54,779
Being the first
woman on jupiter.
16
00:01:56,181 --> 00:01:58,883
Not that steve
is anything to laugh at.
17
00:02:04,556 --> 00:02:05,589
You know,
18
00:02:05,590 --> 00:02:07,458
It does seem odd,
doesn't it?
19
00:02:07,459 --> 00:02:10,361
I mean, al and steve
look nothing like jim,
20
00:02:10,362 --> 00:02:13,298
Yet they're all lumped
together as "men."
21
00:02:15,167 --> 00:02:16,634
Well, let's not
be hasty.
22
00:02:16,635 --> 00:02:17,936
Men like jim jupiter
may not be
23
00:02:17,937 --> 00:02:19,804
All they're
cracked up to be.
24
00:02:19,805 --> 00:02:22,606
Take away his biceps,
triceps, quadriceps
25
00:02:22,607 --> 00:02:25,343
Washboard stomach,
and what have you got?
26
00:02:26,445 --> 00:02:27,979
Whoa!
27
00:02:29,047 --> 00:02:31,716
Whoa! No more tacos
at lunch for me.
28
00:02:32,618 --> 00:02:33,618
Peg,
29
00:02:33,619 --> 00:02:35,152
Could you wring
this shirt out?
30
00:02:35,153 --> 00:02:36,821
I gotta
wear it tomorrow.
31
00:02:38,090 --> 00:02:39,223
Is there
any food?
32
00:02:39,224 --> 00:02:41,292
There's a six-pack
in the fridge.
33
00:02:41,293 --> 00:02:43,728
I kinda like something
to wash it down with.
34
00:02:43,729 --> 00:02:45,529
Why don't you pop
this chicken in the oven?
35
00:02:45,530 --> 00:02:47,231
Oh! Ha-ha!
36
00:02:47,232 --> 00:02:49,200
Excuse me, marce.
That's an honest mistake.
37
00:02:51,036 --> 00:02:52,937
Squish away
from me.
38
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:56,074
I've known him
for four years,
39
00:02:56,075 --> 00:02:57,742
And I've never
seen him dry.
40
00:02:57,743 --> 00:02:59,944
You've never
had sex with him.
41
00:03:01,981 --> 00:03:03,048
Oh, look,
42
00:03:03,049 --> 00:03:05,116
Jim's greased up
and ready.
43
00:03:05,117 --> 00:03:07,251
Who's the sissy mary?
44
00:03:07,252 --> 00:03:08,553
That's
jim jupiter,
45
00:03:08,554 --> 00:03:10,154
The healthiest
man in chicago.
46
00:03:10,155 --> 00:03:13,190
Oh, yeah? Does he have
guns like these?
47
00:03:17,997 --> 00:03:19,864
Put your arms
down, al.
48
00:03:19,865 --> 00:03:21,465
You're killing
the plants.
49
00:03:23,002 --> 00:03:24,469
Oh, jim's
speaking.
50
00:03:24,470 --> 00:03:27,806
Okay, ladies. You knowwhat it's time to do now.
51
00:03:27,807 --> 00:03:30,141
Dash off
to a judy garland concert?
52
00:03:30,142 --> 00:03:31,209
Shh! Shh!
53
00:03:31,210 --> 00:03:32,978
It's timeto announce the winner
54
00:03:32,979 --> 00:03:35,380
Of the freejim jupiter workout.
55
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:37,449
Yup. Jim is gonna spendtwo whole, healthy weeks
56
00:03:37,450 --> 00:03:38,750
With some lucky woman.
57
00:03:38,751 --> 00:03:41,553
Me, me, me!
Me, me, me, me!
58
00:03:41,554 --> 00:03:44,755
Now, what lucky ladywill get to spend two weekswith jim jupiter,
59
00:03:44,756 --> 00:03:46,524
The healthiest man in chicago?
60
00:03:48,227 --> 00:03:50,028
And the winner is...
61
00:03:52,398 --> 00:03:55,366
Miss peggy bundy!
62
00:03:55,367 --> 00:03:56,767
Ah, ha-ha-ha!
63
00:03:56,768 --> 00:03:58,436
Ah ha-ha-ha!
64
00:03:58,437 --> 00:04:00,371
I can't believe it!
65
00:04:00,372 --> 00:04:01,539
I can't believe it!
66
00:04:03,175 --> 00:04:05,477
Marcie, I get to watch
jim jupiter
67
00:04:05,478 --> 00:04:09,881
Do squat thrusts
for two whole weeks
in my house.
68
00:04:09,882 --> 00:04:11,683
Can you believe it?
69
00:04:11,684 --> 00:04:13,084
Oh, so what?
70
00:04:13,085 --> 00:04:14,886
Who needs him?
71
00:04:14,887 --> 00:04:17,689
I already have a real man
at my house.
72
00:04:17,690 --> 00:04:19,891
Steve:
♪ a wandering minstrel, I ♪
73
00:04:19,892 --> 00:04:22,527
♪ a thing of threads
and patches ♪
74
00:04:22,528 --> 00:04:24,429
What do ya think, marce?
75
00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:26,130
Wanna go see
mikado tonight?
76
00:04:26,131 --> 00:04:28,967
♪ for he's going to marry
yum-yum, yum-yum ♪
77
00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:32,436
Oh, please,
let me watch jim squat.
78
00:04:32,437 --> 00:04:33,938
Just once. Please?
79
00:04:33,939 --> 00:04:36,174
Well, okay.
But don't touch.
80
00:04:36,175 --> 00:04:37,876
Now, I've got to buy
a new leotard.
81
00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:40,078
I wanna
look great for jim.
82
00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:41,645
Forget it. He's not coming.
83
00:04:41,646 --> 00:04:43,214
No, ma'am. No chance.
84
00:04:43,215 --> 00:04:44,548
No way, no how.
85
00:04:44,549 --> 00:04:45,916
Peg, I'm sorry,
86
00:04:45,917 --> 00:04:47,618
But this time
I just have to say--
87
00:04:49,387 --> 00:04:50,888
I have spoken.
88
00:04:55,427 --> 00:04:57,162
Wanna see
mikado tonight?
89
00:04:57,163 --> 00:04:59,897
Who's he fighting?
90
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:02,901
I can't
believe it!
91
00:05:02,902 --> 00:05:05,603
I get to watch jim jupiter
flex and ripple
92
00:05:05,604 --> 00:05:08,072
In the privacy of my own home.
93
00:05:08,073 --> 00:05:10,742
Mom, do I really have to
share a room with kelly
94
00:05:10,743 --> 00:05:12,410
While that exercise
guy is here?
95
00:05:12,411 --> 00:05:14,846
I'll be up all night
with all those guys babbling,
96
00:05:14,847 --> 00:05:16,848
"hurry up. I gotta
get back to the ship."
97
00:05:24,423 --> 00:05:25,990
Now, kids,
98
00:05:25,991 --> 00:05:28,192
Will you just forget about
your empty little lives
99
00:05:28,193 --> 00:05:30,261
And think
about mine?
100
00:05:30,262 --> 00:05:32,196
Jim jupiter will
be here any minute.
101
00:05:32,197 --> 00:05:33,932
How do I look?
102
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:34,933
Hot.
103
00:05:34,934 --> 00:05:36,000
Desperate.
104
00:05:37,703 --> 00:05:41,105
Good. I didn't wanna send
any mixed signals.
105
00:05:41,106 --> 00:05:42,173
[doorbell rings]
106
00:05:42,174 --> 00:05:43,174
Oh, he's here!
107
00:05:43,175 --> 00:05:44,175
He's here!
108
00:05:44,176 --> 00:05:47,011
Okay, now, everybody
behave normally
109
00:05:47,012 --> 00:05:48,946
And don't say
anything stupid.
110
00:05:50,949 --> 00:05:52,817
Come to mama.
111
00:05:53,886 --> 00:05:55,320
I know, I know.
112
00:05:55,321 --> 00:05:58,089
I'm jim jupiter,
the healthiest man in chicago.
113
00:05:58,691 --> 00:05:59,957
Hi, I'm bud bundy,
114
00:05:59,958 --> 00:06:02,260
The studliest man
on earth.
115
00:06:05,030 --> 00:06:06,063
I'm kelly bundy.
116
00:06:06,064 --> 00:06:07,965
It's a pleasure
to meet you, jim.
117
00:06:11,770 --> 00:06:13,471
He's mine.
118
00:06:13,472 --> 00:06:14,639
Hi!
119
00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:16,006
I'm peggy bundy.
120
00:06:16,007 --> 00:06:17,708
Don't let the wedding ring
fool you.
121
00:06:17,709 --> 00:06:19,276
It means
nothing to me.
122
00:06:21,146 --> 00:06:23,781
Jim...
123
00:06:23,782 --> 00:06:24,849
Uh, bud bundy.
124
00:06:24,850 --> 00:06:27,284
We met
a moment ago.
125
00:06:27,285 --> 00:06:29,486
I have a question
for ya.
126
00:06:31,690 --> 00:06:34,091
How do I gain
upper body strength?
127
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:36,661
Wear arm weights
on your arms
128
00:06:36,662 --> 00:06:38,395
When you squeeze
your pimples?
129
00:06:39,898 --> 00:06:41,065
Stuff a bra!
130
00:06:41,066 --> 00:06:42,434
Pick a nose!
131
00:06:42,435 --> 00:06:44,502
Now, kids,
jim just got here,
132
00:06:44,503 --> 00:06:46,637
And I'm sure he'd
like to strip down.
133
00:06:46,638 --> 00:06:47,972
Oh--
ha-ha.
134
00:06:47,973 --> 00:06:50,775
I mean, sit down
and relax.
135
00:06:51,943 --> 00:06:54,211
So go away.
Dinner's in two weeks.
136
00:06:59,184 --> 00:07:00,351
Oopsie.
137
00:07:07,726 --> 00:07:10,028
Uh-uh. The correct way
to pick something up,
138
00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:11,930
Is to bend
from the knees.
139
00:07:13,431 --> 00:07:14,431
What a shame.
140
00:07:16,201 --> 00:07:19,036
A body like that
and not a brain in his head.
141
00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:29,747
Okay, jim.
142
00:07:29,748 --> 00:07:33,518
Bend me, shape me,
any way you want me.
143
00:07:33,519 --> 00:07:36,354
Well, you've got a good, healthy
attitude about exercise.
144
00:07:36,355 --> 00:07:37,988
I guess we could start
with some warm-ups.
145
00:07:38,790 --> 00:07:40,558
Get down
on all fours.
146
00:07:45,163 --> 00:07:46,865
Woof.
147
00:07:55,140 --> 00:07:56,140
Hi, peg.
148
00:07:57,942 --> 00:07:59,443
How was
your day?
149
00:08:00,212 --> 00:08:01,912
Looking up.
150
00:08:01,913 --> 00:08:04,348
Uh, al, meet jim.
151
00:08:04,349 --> 00:08:06,918
I'm jim jupiter,
the healthiest man in chicago.
152
00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:08,452
Then you should
heal quick
153
00:08:08,453 --> 00:08:10,521
When I pull your spine
through your mouth.
154
00:08:11,590 --> 00:08:14,058
Now, now, now,
boys.
155
00:08:14,059 --> 00:08:15,125
No need to fight.
156
00:08:15,126 --> 00:08:16,494
We're all adults here.
157
00:08:16,495 --> 00:08:18,996
And I think we can come
to an understanding.
158
00:08:18,997 --> 00:08:20,565
But I'm warning you,
if the two of you
159
00:08:20,566 --> 00:08:22,467
Can't come
to an understanding,
160
00:08:22,468 --> 00:08:24,735
I'm afraid you'll just
have to leave, al.
161
00:08:26,738 --> 00:08:28,840
Peg, can I see you
over here for a minute?
162
00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:29,874
Sure, honey.
163
00:08:32,043 --> 00:08:34,279
Peg, as you know
I am the man,
164
00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,747
And a man's home
is his coffin.
165
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:39,918
Don't you understand?
166
00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:42,921
I just want what
every married woman wants:
167
00:08:42,922 --> 00:08:46,824
Someone besides her
husband to live with.
168
00:08:46,825 --> 00:08:49,827
I mean, what do you think
I'm going to do with him?
169
00:08:49,828 --> 00:08:51,796
Lick him up and down?
170
00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:59,404
Nuzzle my head against
his rippling, heaving chest?
171
00:08:59,405 --> 00:09:02,340
Plant little angel kisses
all over his glistening--
172
00:09:02,341 --> 00:09:04,074
Okay, so it's innocent.
173
00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:08,846
But I still don't see
what you need him for.
174
00:09:08,847 --> 00:09:10,981
You wanna bend? Dust.
175
00:09:12,817 --> 00:09:15,119
You wanna reach?
Sweep.
176
00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:16,587
You want sex?
Just let me know
177
00:09:16,588 --> 00:09:18,656
When you're finished,
I'll come home.
178
00:09:24,329 --> 00:09:28,198
Now, peg, I'm only
gonna say this one time.
179
00:09:28,199 --> 00:09:29,199
I want him outta here,
180
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:30,901
I want you
in the kitchen,
181
00:09:30,902 --> 00:09:32,770
And I want
my supper now.
182
00:09:34,239 --> 00:09:35,506
Okay, jim.
183
00:09:35,507 --> 00:09:37,875
Al's going out
to dinner.
184
00:09:37,876 --> 00:09:40,111
Instead of going out
to dinner, mr. Bundy,
185
00:09:40,112 --> 00:09:41,946
Why don't you stay here
and work out with us?
186
00:09:41,947 --> 00:09:44,715
I mean, what's the point
of having a beautiful,
sexy, young wife
187
00:09:44,716 --> 00:09:46,550
If you're just gonna
look like that?
188
00:09:49,388 --> 00:09:51,221
Listen, jim-bellina.
189
00:09:53,825 --> 00:09:57,928
Don't let these slits
on my wrists fool you.
190
00:09:57,929 --> 00:10:00,798
I'm in great shape.
I was an athlete in high school.
191
00:10:00,799 --> 00:10:03,167
So was I.
I was a gymnast.
192
00:10:05,870 --> 00:10:07,738
A gymnast isn't an athlete.
193
00:10:07,739 --> 00:10:11,242
A gymnast is...
Like, like a girl.
194
00:10:13,345 --> 00:10:15,145
[doorbell rings]
195
00:10:17,716 --> 00:10:20,150
I'm just here to borrow
some spirulina.
196
00:10:21,119 --> 00:10:23,053
Ah! Jim jupiter!
197
00:10:24,389 --> 00:10:28,158
Honey, it's jim jupiter.
What a surprise.
198
00:10:28,159 --> 00:10:30,294
Gee, I'll bet
he came in
that van outside
199
00:10:30,295 --> 00:10:31,729
That says,
"jim jupiter."
200
00:10:31,730 --> 00:10:33,397
Shut up.
201
00:10:33,398 --> 00:10:34,932
Hi, I'm marcie.
202
00:10:34,933 --> 00:10:36,767
This is my husband,
scrawny.
203
00:10:40,205 --> 00:10:41,739
I mean, steve.
204
00:10:41,740 --> 00:10:43,307
Hi,
I'm jim jupiter.
205
00:10:43,308 --> 00:10:44,709
Nice to meet you,
steve.
206
00:10:44,710 --> 00:10:46,744
Nice, firm handshake.
207
00:10:46,745 --> 00:10:49,714
Yeah, well, I played a little
sousaphone in high school.
208
00:10:51,149 --> 00:10:53,084
Were you two
getting ready to exercise?
209
00:10:53,085 --> 00:10:54,218
I hate to interrupt.
210
00:10:54,219 --> 00:10:55,653
Well, actually,
jim and I were--
211
00:10:55,654 --> 00:10:58,089
Good, good, good.
Well, I'm all warmed up.
212
00:10:58,090 --> 00:11:00,425
Let's get down on the floor
and get pumped.
213
00:11:02,461 --> 00:11:04,262
You believe these two
want this guy?
214
00:11:04,263 --> 00:11:06,397
Ya know what he did
in high school?
215
00:11:06,398 --> 00:11:08,332
He was a gymnast.
216
00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:10,801
[laughs]
217
00:11:10,802 --> 00:11:13,170
Ah, football
and the band.
218
00:11:13,171 --> 00:11:17,541
That's where the men were
in our day, right, buddy?
219
00:11:17,542 --> 00:11:19,777
Let's say we go get us
a pizza, steve.
220
00:11:19,778 --> 00:11:22,547
Yeah. Let's eat
till we vomit.
221
00:11:22,548 --> 00:11:25,216
You know,
like men.
222
00:11:25,217 --> 00:11:29,286
♪ for we're going to eat
yum-yum, yum-yum ♪
223
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:32,223
Let's begin with
some in-place runs.
224
00:11:32,224 --> 00:11:33,757
You know, to burn off
the tension.
225
00:11:37,730 --> 00:11:39,831
You know, you got
a lotta nerve.
226
00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:41,465
Did I come over
to your house
227
00:11:41,466 --> 00:11:43,701
When you won the
woman in banking award?
228
00:11:43,702 --> 00:11:44,868
Yes, you did.
229
00:11:44,869 --> 00:11:46,404
And you stole
a whole chicken.
230
00:11:48,741 --> 00:11:51,575
Yeah, but at least
I didn't wiggle
my butt in front of it
231
00:11:51,576 --> 00:11:53,144
When I did it.
232
00:11:53,145 --> 00:11:54,778
Follow me, ladies.
233
00:11:55,981 --> 00:11:58,416
You know, marcie,
you're right.
234
00:11:58,417 --> 00:12:01,119
There is plenty of jim
to go around.
235
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:02,753
Let's not forget
we're friends. Agreed?
236
00:12:02,754 --> 00:12:03,788
Agreed.
237
00:12:03,789 --> 00:12:05,356
[laughs]
238
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,128
And three, and four,
and rest.
239
00:12:11,129 --> 00:12:12,129
[sighs]
240
00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:13,263
What happened
to marcie?
241
00:12:13,264 --> 00:12:14,732
Oh,
she lost interest.
242
00:12:14,733 --> 00:12:15,900
[pounding on door]
243
00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:18,102
Marcie:
Lemme in, you swine!
244
00:12:19,638 --> 00:12:21,706
Okay, jim. I'm beat.
245
00:12:21,707 --> 00:12:23,207
I'm just gonna
sit over here
246
00:12:23,208 --> 00:12:25,376
While you flex me
off to sleep.
247
00:12:25,377 --> 00:12:28,112
That's not quite
how it works, mrs. Bundy.
248
00:12:28,113 --> 00:12:31,849
Uh, just how
does it work, jim?
249
00:12:31,850 --> 00:12:35,252
Jim:
And one, and two,
and three, and four,
250
00:12:35,253 --> 00:12:38,322
And five, and six,
and seven, and eight...
251
00:12:38,323 --> 00:12:42,126
Twelve, 13,
14, 15, 16...
252
00:12:42,127 --> 00:12:46,997
Forty-five,
46, 47, 48, 49...
253
00:12:46,998 --> 00:12:53,237
Fifty-seven, 58, 59,
60, 61, 62, 63, 64,
254
00:12:53,238 --> 00:12:55,206
Sixty-five, 66, 67...
255
00:12:56,341 --> 00:12:59,276
[whining]
256
00:13:06,518 --> 00:13:13,591
And 197 and 198
and 199 and 200.
257
00:13:13,592 --> 00:13:16,193
Okay.
258
00:13:16,194 --> 00:13:17,795
I think
you're warmed up.
259
00:13:17,796 --> 00:13:19,396
Let's get started.
260
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:23,668
Bonbon.
261
00:13:23,669 --> 00:13:26,003
No bonbons.
262
00:13:26,004 --> 00:13:28,005
Okay, jim.
263
00:13:28,006 --> 00:13:31,375
Let's clear up
a few misconceptions.
264
00:13:31,376 --> 00:13:34,612
There are two things
peggy bundy doesn't do.
265
00:13:34,613 --> 00:13:36,347
Number one:
266
00:13:36,348 --> 00:13:40,551
Cook, clean, sew, vacuum,
iron, and parent.
267
00:13:42,387 --> 00:13:44,087
And number two:
268
00:13:44,088 --> 00:13:45,156
Exercise.
269
00:13:45,157 --> 00:13:48,826
Well, jim jupiter
loves a challenge.
270
00:13:48,827 --> 00:13:50,794
Bonbon.
271
00:13:50,795 --> 00:13:53,197
I'm here to change
your whole life, peggy bundy.
272
00:13:53,198 --> 00:13:54,398
Bonbon!
273
00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:57,934
Mrs. Bundy,
you're a strong woman.
274
00:13:57,935 --> 00:14:00,103
But I'm the healthiest man
in chicago.
275
00:14:00,104 --> 00:14:02,839
I can see this week
is gonna be a test of wills.
276
00:14:11,717 --> 00:14:13,250
Bonbon.
277
00:14:18,122 --> 00:14:20,023
I like strawberry the best,
don't you?
278
00:14:20,024 --> 00:14:21,559
Actually,
the mocha are--
shh!
279
00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:22,793
Oprah's on!
280
00:14:22,794 --> 00:14:23,861
Oh.
281
00:14:31,302 --> 00:14:33,070
Peggy,
you look fabulous.
282
00:14:33,071 --> 00:14:35,172
That time with jim
really paid off.
283
00:14:35,173 --> 00:14:36,173
Do you feel
better?
284
00:14:36,174 --> 00:14:37,574
Oh,
I certainly do.
285
00:14:37,575 --> 00:14:40,377
And jim says as long as
I stick with my program,
286
00:14:40,378 --> 00:14:43,180
I'll live a long
and happy life.
287
00:14:43,181 --> 00:14:45,883
Oh, he's on.
288
00:14:45,884 --> 00:14:48,118
Announcer:
And now, ladies,live from chicago,
289
00:14:48,119 --> 00:14:50,554
The jim jupiter show!
290
00:14:53,658 --> 00:14:56,360
Hi, ladies.I'm jim jupiter...
291
00:14:57,828 --> 00:14:59,997
The healthiest manin chicago.
292
00:14:59,998 --> 00:15:03,167
Now,let's get that exercise thing
293
00:15:03,168 --> 00:15:04,402
Over with, shall we?
294
00:15:04,403 --> 00:15:05,403
[coughs]
295
00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:06,703
And one...
296
00:15:08,306 --> 00:15:10,907
He's put on some weight,
hasn't he?
297
00:15:10,908 --> 00:15:13,377
Oh,
he's just pumped.
298
00:15:13,378 --> 00:15:15,179
In his chin?
299
00:15:17,348 --> 00:15:19,683
[coughing]
300
00:15:24,122 --> 00:15:25,489
Oh, no!
301
00:15:25,490 --> 00:15:27,090
He-- he's dead!
302
00:15:30,696 --> 00:15:33,463
My boyfriend's dead!
303
00:15:33,464 --> 00:15:35,766
Your boyfriend?He's my boyfriend!
304
00:15:35,767 --> 00:15:36,767
No. Mine.
305
00:15:36,768 --> 00:15:37,768
Mine!
306
00:15:37,769 --> 00:15:39,503
Mine!He's mine!
307
00:15:39,504 --> 00:15:41,571
Oh, my hair!You tramp!
308
00:15:42,941 --> 00:15:44,908
I can't
believe it.
309
00:15:44,909 --> 00:15:47,244
He looked so healthy
when he was here.
310
00:15:47,245 --> 00:15:49,446
What could have
happened to him?
311
00:16:02,427 --> 00:16:06,897
"blood-sugar level enough
to kill three horses,
312
00:16:06,898 --> 00:16:10,901
Cholesterol-level high enough
to dam the mighty mississippi."
313
00:16:12,804 --> 00:16:14,638
That's writing!
314
00:16:14,639 --> 00:16:16,573
Oh, it's my
fault, al.
315
00:16:16,574 --> 00:16:17,708
I did it.
316
00:16:17,709 --> 00:16:20,411
I killed the healthiest man
in chicago.
317
00:16:20,412 --> 00:16:22,446
Well, you've been
killing me
318
00:16:22,447 --> 00:16:24,315
And you don't
seem to care.
319
00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:26,383
Yeah,
you're different.
320
00:16:26,384 --> 00:16:29,352
You've been as good
as dead for years.
321
00:16:29,353 --> 00:16:31,121
But what about
our children?
322
00:16:31,122 --> 00:16:33,423
I mean, is our lifestyle
killing them?
323
00:16:33,424 --> 00:16:35,725
Do we care enough
about our kids?
324
00:16:35,726 --> 00:16:38,162
Are we concerned
enough, as parents?
325
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:39,462
Where are the kids?
326
00:16:39,463 --> 00:16:41,198
How would I know?
327
00:16:42,968 --> 00:16:44,367
Burgers here.
328
00:16:44,368 --> 00:16:46,036
Who had
the wet and greasy?
329
00:16:49,774 --> 00:16:52,409
No more burgers
for this family.
330
00:16:56,448 --> 00:16:58,749
How do we get our
vitamins and rocks?
331
00:17:01,586 --> 00:17:03,888
That-- that's
minerals, kel.
332
00:17:07,191 --> 00:17:08,859
Yeah.
333
00:17:08,860 --> 00:17:10,294
Don't you get it?
334
00:17:10,295 --> 00:17:12,396
Did jim jupiter die in vain?
335
00:17:12,397 --> 00:17:15,166
Well, jim taught me
that enjoying your food
336
00:17:15,167 --> 00:17:16,934
Only leads to death.
337
00:17:16,935 --> 00:17:19,203
And I will not be responsible
for the death
338
00:17:19,204 --> 00:17:21,638
Or enjoyment of any member
of this family.
339
00:17:22,974 --> 00:17:26,877
So, for once, we bundys
will learn from our mistakes.
340
00:17:26,878 --> 00:17:30,147
Bud, you will not
be a shoe salesman.
341
00:17:32,851 --> 00:17:34,017
And from now on,
342
00:17:34,018 --> 00:17:36,487
We're going to start
eating right.
343
00:17:36,488 --> 00:17:37,822
You mean
with forks?
344
00:17:40,592 --> 00:17:43,293
I am trying to show
love for this family.
345
00:17:43,294 --> 00:17:45,429
So either shut up or get out.
346
00:17:49,801 --> 00:17:51,334
Get back here!
347
00:17:52,604 --> 00:17:54,105
All right, now.
348
00:17:54,106 --> 00:17:56,373
I will make the first sacrifice.
349
00:18:01,179 --> 00:18:02,613
My bonbons.
350
00:18:05,182 --> 00:18:06,717
[dog howls]
351
00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:10,287
Sorry, buck!
352
00:18:11,456 --> 00:18:13,790
And now, we eat dinner.
353
00:18:15,660 --> 00:18:17,494
Nice life.
354
00:18:17,495 --> 00:18:19,596
Mom kills some guy
and we have to suffer.
355
00:18:20,698 --> 00:18:22,332
Yeah. Why didn't we have
to use forks
356
00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:24,268
When aunt pearlie
killed uncle dave?
357
00:18:25,236 --> 00:18:26,837
Well, that was
just an accident.
358
00:18:26,838 --> 00:18:28,371
The ice pick flew
out of her hand.
359
00:18:30,441 --> 00:18:32,242
Thirteen times?
360
00:18:36,715 --> 00:18:40,217
Daddy, if I eat
any more wheat "gurm,"
361
00:18:40,218 --> 00:18:42,352
I'm gonna lose my mind.
362
00:18:45,757 --> 00:18:48,458
Dad, you think
you're the boss.
Do something.
363
00:18:50,929 --> 00:18:52,596
No can do, bud.
364
00:18:52,597 --> 00:18:54,331
See, your mother's
never actually
365
00:18:54,332 --> 00:18:56,399
Physically killed
a man before.
366
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:59,537
So I'm afraid we're gonna have
to bear with her for a few days.
367
00:18:59,538 --> 00:19:01,438
Okay, family.
368
00:19:01,439 --> 00:19:03,073
Home cooking!
369
00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:08,979
What is it tonight, mom?
Bee spit?
370
00:19:11,683 --> 00:19:13,283
Sunflower paste.
371
00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:17,621
Mmm. I'm gonna spread mine
on styrofoam.
372
00:19:20,091 --> 00:19:22,492
That's a rice cake,
bud.
373
00:19:22,493 --> 00:19:25,062
Now, isn't
this delicious?
374
00:19:25,063 --> 00:19:27,130
I'm so glad
we're eating healthy.
375
00:19:27,131 --> 00:19:28,799
We're cleansing
ourselves,
376
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:31,869
And I do--
I feel ten years younger.
377
00:19:34,672 --> 00:19:37,507
[sobbing]
378
00:19:39,077 --> 00:19:42,880
I wanna live,
but not like this!
379
00:19:42,881 --> 00:19:45,683
Come on, everybody.
Family meeting.
380
00:19:54,558 --> 00:19:56,059
Now, peg,
381
00:19:56,060 --> 00:19:59,663
I know you think
you're responsible
for killing jim,
382
00:19:59,664 --> 00:20:02,032
And yet you have no guilt
of squashing the life out of me,
383
00:20:02,033 --> 00:20:03,967
But that's
another meeting.
384
00:20:03,968 --> 00:20:06,236
Anyway, what
I'm trying to say is,
385
00:20:06,237 --> 00:20:07,637
You didn't kill jim.
386
00:20:07,638 --> 00:20:10,307
Good health
killed jim.
387
00:20:10,308 --> 00:20:13,110
See, he purified his
body so completely,
388
00:20:13,111 --> 00:20:15,679
That when finally
called upon to do so,
389
00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:18,015
He couldn't handle
the grease, and sugar
390
00:20:18,016 --> 00:20:19,850
And toxic waste
that we call food.
391
00:20:21,485 --> 00:20:23,754
He rendered himself
extinct.
392
00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:27,157
See, healthy people
are like dinosaurs.
393
00:20:27,158 --> 00:20:29,125
They're not fit
to survive.
394
00:20:31,529 --> 00:20:32,829
Jim's body
couldn't handle
395
00:20:32,830 --> 00:20:34,264
The burgers,
and bonbons,
396
00:20:34,265 --> 00:20:36,333
And pastry suckings
like real americans.
397
00:20:38,169 --> 00:20:41,605
You see, peg,
we are the truly strong.
398
00:20:41,606 --> 00:20:43,207
You really
think so, al?
399
00:20:43,208 --> 00:20:44,608
Absolutely.
400
00:20:44,609 --> 00:20:46,242
See that cockroach
over there?
401
00:20:47,111 --> 00:20:48,111
That one?
402
00:20:48,112 --> 00:20:49,112
No, that one.
403
00:20:51,916 --> 00:20:53,851
Well, any one
of them.
404
00:20:53,852 --> 00:20:57,955
You don't see them carrying
off a can of wheat germ, do you?
405
00:20:57,956 --> 00:20:59,823
"gurm," dad.
406
00:21:02,627 --> 00:21:04,795
Thank you,
pumpkin.
407
00:21:06,530 --> 00:21:08,798
So, peg, let's all
follow the example
408
00:21:08,799 --> 00:21:10,267
Of our friend,
the cockroach.
409
00:21:10,268 --> 00:21:12,002
They were here
before man.
410
00:21:12,003 --> 00:21:13,470
They'll
be here after man.
411
00:21:13,471 --> 00:21:14,571
You know why?
412
00:21:14,572 --> 00:21:16,306
They eat crap.
413
00:21:19,511 --> 00:21:22,179
And I say, "anything that's
good enough for the cockroach
414
00:21:22,180 --> 00:21:24,114
Is good enough
for my family."
415
00:21:24,115 --> 00:21:25,748
Hey! Oh, dad!
416
00:21:28,252 --> 00:21:29,453
Oh, al,
417
00:21:29,454 --> 00:21:30,687
You really do care.
418
00:21:30,688 --> 00:21:32,021
Darn right I do.
419
00:21:32,022 --> 00:21:33,490
I don't know
about the rest of you,
420
00:21:33,491 --> 00:21:36,159
But I'm hungry enough
to block a colon.
421
00:21:38,596 --> 00:21:42,132
Grease burgers for
everyone, on dad!
422
00:21:42,133 --> 00:21:43,766
[cheering]
423
00:21:43,767 --> 00:21:45,469
Grease! Grease!
424
00:21:45,470 --> 00:21:47,204
Let's get
lots of mayonnaise.
425
00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:05,054
[♪]
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