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1
00:00:01,479 --> 00:00:03,829
And the squeak, squeak, squeak
of Dan's flossing
2
00:00:03,873 --> 00:00:06,615
with his pinky in the air... Ugh.
3
00:00:06,658 --> 00:00:08,921
Makes me want him
to hit an artery
4
00:00:08,965 --> 00:00:12,534
and just float away
on a pool of his own blood... Mm-hmm.
5
00:00:12,577 --> 00:00:14,797
The floss dangling
from his teeth.
6
00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:16,799
Mm. When Diana
would drink water,
7
00:00:16,842 --> 00:00:19,062
which was the only thing that
she actually liked in life...
8
00:00:19,106 --> 00:00:21,804
Oh... she would drink and then
she would smack her lips --
9
00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:23,240
No.
10
00:00:23,284 --> 00:00:25,068
And then go, "Oh, wow,
that's refreshing,"
11
00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:26,678
as if it's news
that water's refreshing.
12
00:00:26,722 --> 00:00:28,289
I wanted to rip her lips
off her face.
13
00:00:28,332 --> 00:00:29,464
Yes.
14
00:00:29,507 --> 00:00:31,074
I mean, I do miss it, but...
15
00:00:31,118 --> 00:00:33,163
I'll tell you what -- what
really makes me quite violent
16
00:00:33,207 --> 00:00:34,947
is when Henry plays the guitar,
17
00:00:34,991 --> 00:00:36,079
he makes --
I don't even know what.
18
00:00:36,123 --> 00:00:37,733
It's like the most earnest face.
19
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:39,822
It's like -- It's like... mmm.
20
00:00:39,865 --> 00:00:41,432
I don't even know what it is. Oh, don't do that.
Don't do that.
21
00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:43,608
But what I want to do is I want
to punch him in that face
22
00:00:43,652 --> 00:00:45,088
and then I want
to punch him again
23
00:00:45,132 --> 00:00:46,698
and then I want to
just flick him
24
00:00:46,742 --> 00:00:48,135
as, like, the final insult.
25
00:00:48,178 --> 00:00:50,224
Hey, guys. Hey, boo.
26
00:00:50,267 --> 00:00:53,488
I am gonna go make
some of my famous gazpacho.
27
00:00:53,531 --> 00:00:54,445
Ooh.
28
00:00:54,489 --> 00:00:55,533
Yeah.
29
00:00:57,579 --> 00:00:59,494
I don't know how you stay married to
him. I wanna rip my ears off my head.
30
00:00:59,537 --> 00:01:01,061
Why?
31
00:01:02,192 --> 00:01:04,107
Oh.
32
00:01:04,151 --> 00:01:05,674
Well, not everyone
likes a cold soup.
33
00:01:05,717 --> 00:01:07,763
I get it. It's not for everyone.
34
00:01:07,806 --> 00:01:10,940
♪♪
35
00:01:10,983 --> 00:01:12,246
♪ Hey!
36
00:01:12,289 --> 00:01:15,814
♪♪
37
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:24,301
Ben: Of course, I know
Sasha's upset with me,
38
00:01:24,345 --> 00:01:26,260
but it's the right decision.
39
00:01:26,303 --> 00:01:29,263
It's really a bummer that
I ruined my shot with Sasha,
40
00:01:29,306 --> 00:01:33,441
but I do believe deep down that
Priscilla and I could...
41
00:01:33,484 --> 00:01:43,451
♪♪
42
00:01:43,494 --> 00:01:53,461
♪♪
43
00:01:53,504 --> 00:02:03,471
♪♪
44
00:02:03,514 --> 00:02:13,481
♪♪
45
00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:26,450
Mom, Evan's trying
to cut my hair!
46
00:02:26,494 --> 00:02:27,756
'Cause it looks like crap!
47
00:02:27,799 --> 00:02:29,192
It does not look like crap.
48
00:02:29,236 --> 00:02:31,107
But seriously, Nora,
run a brush through it.
49
00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:33,109
You guys, you have to go
make the bus.
50
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:35,198
I can't take you
to school today.
51
00:02:35,242 --> 00:02:36,373
I'm late for an appointment.
52
00:02:36,417 --> 00:02:37,809
Mom, can I have cash?
53
00:02:37,853 --> 00:02:39,942
Backpacks on. Now, go! What for?
54
00:02:39,985 --> 00:02:41,509
Drugs. Crack, specifically.
55
00:02:41,552 --> 00:02:42,988
I really hope that's not true,
Andrea.
56
00:02:43,032 --> 00:02:44,251
Is $5 enough? Thank you.
57
00:02:44,294 --> 00:02:45,904
Mm!
58
00:02:45,948 --> 00:02:47,558
Wait, no, that's mine!
59
00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,346
Come on, guys.
We gotta get the bus.
60
00:02:52,389 --> 00:02:56,828
♪♪
61
00:02:56,872 --> 00:02:58,787
Jodie. Whoa!
62
00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:00,571
Dan, what are you doing home?
63
00:03:00,615 --> 00:03:03,705
I tried to go to work,
but I don't feel well.
64
00:03:05,663 --> 00:03:07,230
I think I'm gonna throw up.
65
00:03:07,274 --> 00:03:10,146
Oh. Is there a trash
can you prefer I use?
66
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,582
Is -- Is the toilet
not an option?
67
00:03:11,626 --> 00:03:14,977
No, I mean to put
beside the bed.
68
00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:16,935
Or I could just lie with my head
69
00:03:16,979 --> 00:03:18,459
pressed against the cold floor.
70
00:03:18,502 --> 00:03:20,243
You know what?
I think it's dealer's choice.
71
00:03:20,287 --> 00:03:21,331
Just please don't use a wicker
trash can from the kids' room.
72
00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:22,245
I'm so sorry. I've got to go.
73
00:03:22,289 --> 00:03:23,638
Jodie!
74
00:03:23,681 --> 00:03:25,857
Do you think you could stay?
I'm dizzy.
75
00:03:27,163 --> 00:03:30,210
And what if I pass out
and hit my head?
76
00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:32,821
I wouldn't want you or the kids
to find me like that.
77
00:03:34,736 --> 00:03:36,085
♪♪
78
00:03:36,128 --> 00:03:38,130
I don't want you to die
like that, either.
79
00:03:38,174 --> 00:03:40,307
♪♪
80
00:03:40,350 --> 00:03:43,266
It's coming. Yeah.
81
00:03:43,310 --> 00:03:45,790
Oh, w-would you get my computer,
please?
82
00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:47,096
Mm.
83
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:50,404
♪♪
84
00:03:58,499 --> 00:04:00,718
Hey, you. Jodie: Hey, you.
85
00:04:00,762 --> 00:04:02,459
Hi. Uh-oh.
86
00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:04,418
I know that "hi." What's wrong?
87
00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:06,071
I'm so sorry to do this
last minute,
88
00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:08,117
but I'm not gonna be able
to make it to our session today.
89
00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:09,684
My kid is sick.
90
00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:11,163
Take it off my series, though.
91
00:04:11,207 --> 00:04:12,600
No, no, no.
Don't even worry about it, no.
92
00:04:12,643 --> 00:04:14,297
I know you got a lot
on your plate.
93
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:16,604
Half greens, quarter protein,
and a quarter carbs --
94
00:04:16,647 --> 00:04:18,040
Complex, not simple. Not simple.
95
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,434
Dan: I'm gonna blow again!
96
00:04:20,477 --> 00:04:21,609
Need another trash can!
97
00:04:21,652 --> 00:04:23,219
I'll be there in just a minute!
98
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,873
But I'm running in place.
99
00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,309
I'll lose the last pound
from home.
100
00:04:26,353 --> 00:04:27,658
How about
those jumping jack twists
101
00:04:27,702 --> 00:04:29,138
that I'm trademarking
for my program?
102
00:04:29,181 --> 00:04:30,879
They will blast the calories.
103
00:04:30,922 --> 00:04:32,533
Here we go. And jack and twist!
104
00:04:32,576 --> 00:04:33,664
And jack and twist!
105
00:04:33,708 --> 00:04:35,362
Jack! Twist! Jack! Twist!
106
00:04:35,405 --> 00:04:36,624
Too late!
107
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,060
Ugh. I'll call you back.
108
00:04:38,103 --> 00:04:39,714
High knees!
109
00:04:39,757 --> 00:04:41,237
Keep those knees high,
and I'm gonna send you
110
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,891
a home workout video
that I recorded.
111
00:04:42,934 --> 00:04:44,545
Little glitch --
It plays upside down,
112
00:04:44,588 --> 00:04:46,068
but otherwise, it's cool.
113
00:04:46,111 --> 00:04:49,854
♪♪
114
00:04:49,898 --> 00:04:51,291
Oh, uh...
115
00:04:51,334 --> 00:04:53,380
No, I-I'm Luke's mother.
I'm not trespassing.
116
00:04:53,423 --> 00:04:54,685
No, I know, Mrs. Lakier.
117
00:04:54,729 --> 00:04:56,034
Security recognizes you now.
118
00:04:56,078 --> 00:04:57,471
Quick thing. Man...
119
00:04:57,514 --> 00:04:58,776
Hey.
120
00:04:58,820 --> 00:05:00,561
Uh, today at recess,
the kids were playing
121
00:05:00,604 --> 00:05:03,477
in their cars on the playground,
and Macy cut Luke off,
122
00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:05,348
drove in front of him,
bumped into him,
123
00:05:05,392 --> 00:05:07,916
and he called her
a "bleeping bleep bleep."
124
00:05:07,959 --> 00:05:11,093
Well, I mean,
is she a bleeping bleep bleep?
125
00:05:11,136 --> 00:05:13,051
Let's just say she's not
a good driver
126
00:05:13,095 --> 00:05:16,751
and too old to pronounce
the word animal "aminal,"
127
00:05:16,794 --> 00:05:18,274
but regardless,
128
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,189
we try and encourage
our students to be kind
129
00:05:20,232 --> 00:05:22,234
and fill each others' buckets
with positivity.
130
00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:24,106
Shoot. Did Luke need a bucket
for school?
131
00:05:24,149 --> 00:05:26,282
No, it's a metaphorical bucket.
132
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,589
Okay, well, that's way cheaper.
133
00:05:28,632 --> 00:05:30,765
Yeah. So when this sort of thing
happens,
134
00:05:30,808 --> 00:05:32,375
we usually find
that it's because
135
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:35,509
the child is parroting
something they hear at home.
136
00:05:35,552 --> 00:05:37,249
Okay, so you mean like
a babysitter?
137
00:05:37,293 --> 00:05:40,078
Oh, no, no, no, no.
We loveGloria here.
138
00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:41,210
Please say hi.
139
00:05:41,253 --> 00:05:42,864
This is a more recent change.
140
00:05:42,907 --> 00:05:45,170
Puberty. Nope, that's a ways off.
141
00:05:45,214 --> 00:05:47,216
Well, I developed very early,
okay?
142
00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:48,391
I mean, it was great at first.
143
00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:50,001
It was kind of fun and exciting,
144
00:05:50,045 --> 00:05:53,570
and then changing in gym class
got a little... you know.
145
00:05:53,614 --> 00:05:55,398
I'm sure it was.
146
00:05:55,442 --> 00:05:57,487
So, uh,
not to assign blame... Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
147
00:05:57,531 --> 00:06:01,056
But it's probably a parent
Luke's parroting.
148
00:06:01,099 --> 00:06:03,841
Mm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
149
00:06:12,676 --> 00:06:14,156
Okay, I'm gonna go,
150
00:06:14,199 --> 00:06:16,071
'cause these kids
aren't gonna wipe themselves.
151
00:06:16,114 --> 00:06:17,986
Okay, hey, I will --
I'll talk to Luke's dad
152
00:06:18,029 --> 00:06:19,291
about being a better role model.
153
00:06:19,335 --> 00:06:21,206
He's a real loose cannon, okay?
154
00:06:23,774 --> 00:06:25,254
Wait, why did I come here?
155
00:06:25,297 --> 00:06:26,995
Oh, God. Luke.
156
00:06:27,038 --> 00:06:28,910
You get it.
157
00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:30,999
♪♪
158
00:06:32,217 --> 00:06:33,436
Hey, Bri.
159
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:36,787
I got you some groceries
at Fields.
160
00:06:36,831 --> 00:06:37,919
Hi. Hey.
161
00:06:37,962 --> 00:06:39,486
These are all about to expire,
162
00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:41,792
so if I were you,
I'd get on it. Oh, wow.
163
00:06:41,836 --> 00:06:43,664
Thank you. You are spoiling us.
164
00:06:43,707 --> 00:06:44,708
Where's Lila?
165
00:06:44,752 --> 00:06:46,667
Napping, I hope.
166
00:06:46,710 --> 00:06:47,972
That cheap baby monitor I got
167
00:06:48,016 --> 00:06:50,322
only picks up
the neighbor's Ring cam.
168
00:06:50,366 --> 00:06:51,889
I think the wife's
having an affair.
169
00:06:51,933 --> 00:06:54,022
The pest guy
stays there way too long.
170
00:06:54,065 --> 00:06:55,284
What a mess.
171
00:06:55,327 --> 00:06:56,633
You know, I've been meaning
to clean out
172
00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:59,157
this closet for awhile.
173
00:06:59,201 --> 00:07:01,595
God, Coleen was such a slob.
174
00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:04,380
Oh, my God.
175
00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:06,426
This is the scarf! What scarf?
176
00:07:06,469 --> 00:07:07,862
Uh, thescarf.
177
00:07:07,905 --> 00:07:09,211
I don't know what
you're talking about.
178
00:07:09,254 --> 00:07:10,865
The one!
The one with the chickens on it!
179
00:07:10,908 --> 00:07:13,258
She said that you tried
to tie her up with this.
180
00:07:13,302 --> 00:07:16,914
Okay, it's roosters,
and, no, I did not.
181
00:07:16,958 --> 00:07:18,220
Unless she said it was great.
182
00:07:19,743 --> 00:07:21,702
I don't think that "great"
was the word.
183
00:07:21,745 --> 00:07:23,704
I think it was...
184
00:07:23,747 --> 00:07:26,794
"awkward, embarrassing,"
oh, and "sad."
185
00:07:26,837 --> 00:07:28,186
But it was a good story.
186
00:07:28,230 --> 00:07:29,927
That she wasn't supposed
to tell anyone.
187
00:07:29,971 --> 00:07:32,190
She didn't.
Just me, Jodie, and Amy.
188
00:07:32,234 --> 00:07:34,410
Oh. For the record,
I did a great job.
189
00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:35,933
The problem was her wrists.
190
00:07:35,977 --> 00:07:39,154
For such a thin woman,
she had very thick wrists.
191
00:07:39,197 --> 00:07:41,461
It's why she always
wore men's watches.
192
00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:43,680
You know, Brian, not everybody's
great at bondage.
193
00:07:43,724 --> 00:07:46,640
Okay, Coleen was
a very unreliable narrator.
194
00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:49,599
I will show you exactly
how good I did.
195
00:07:49,643 --> 00:07:52,036
Oh. Come on. Get in there.
196
00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:53,777
Be my guest.
197
00:07:53,821 --> 00:07:55,475
The first thing I can tell you
you did wrong
198
00:07:55,518 --> 00:07:56,780
without seeing anything
199
00:07:56,824 --> 00:07:58,826
is that you used a scarf
with chickens on it.
200
00:07:58,869 --> 00:08:00,610
Again, roosters,
201
00:08:00,654 --> 00:08:02,960
and it was the only scarf
that she'd let us ruin.
202
00:08:03,004 --> 00:08:04,396
It was a gift from my mom,
203
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:06,921
which probably added
a creepy layer to things.
204
00:08:06,964 --> 00:08:08,966
Mm-hmm. Might be why
it didn't work out.
205
00:08:09,010 --> 00:08:10,664
And done.
206
00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:13,623
See, I don't think
it was her fat wrists,
207
00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:15,233
may they rest in peace.
208
00:08:15,277 --> 00:08:16,583
I think it was you.
209
00:08:16,626 --> 00:08:17,975
Why don't you
have a seat... Okay.
210
00:08:18,019 --> 00:08:19,716
And I will show you
how it's actually done.
211
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,370
You remember my ex, Diana.
212
00:08:21,413 --> 00:08:22,893
Mm-hmm. She was a freak.
213
00:08:22,937 --> 00:08:24,808
Couldn't tie her legs together.
You know what I mean?
214
00:08:24,852 --> 00:08:26,767
So, uh -- Oh.
215
00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:28,986
What else did Coleen
tell you about me?
216
00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:31,554
Um, that you cry at rom-coms,
217
00:08:31,598 --> 00:08:33,730
uh, you love
the Dave Matthews Band,
218
00:08:33,774 --> 00:08:35,253
and that you sit when you pee.
219
00:08:35,297 --> 00:08:37,212
Every man does when
no one's around.
220
00:08:37,255 --> 00:08:39,606
You have a blankie named Bolly.
221
00:08:39,649 --> 00:08:42,304
You barricade the doors at night
in case of an intruder.
222
00:08:42,347 --> 00:08:43,958
Because zombies.
223
00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:45,307
Yeah.
224
00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:46,787
Amy: Alright, heads up, Luke.
225
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:49,311
Glass incoming.
226
00:08:49,354 --> 00:08:52,749
Watch where you're going,
you... nice man.
227
00:08:52,793 --> 00:08:54,316
You very nice man.
228
00:08:54,359 --> 00:08:57,058
Mommy, you're not gonna
take that, are you?
229
00:08:57,101 --> 00:08:59,626
I am. I am gonna bend over
and I am gonna take it,
230
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:01,845
because that's what we do
when people upset us.
231
00:09:01,889 --> 00:09:03,978
Mother...
232
00:09:04,021 --> 00:09:07,503
of two is what I am.
233
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,505
Okay.
234
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:12,029
This is so hard.
235
00:09:15,685 --> 00:09:16,947
There you go. Lunge. Lunge.
236
00:09:16,991 --> 00:09:19,515
That's right. 90-degree angle!
237
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,343
You guys are doing great.
Sweet, okay.
238
00:09:21,386 --> 00:09:23,693
For this next one,
you can use any household item
239
00:09:23,737 --> 00:09:25,739
if you don't have any weights
at home.
240
00:09:25,782 --> 00:09:27,828
I like to use
a large bottle of shampoo.
241
00:09:27,871 --> 00:09:30,004
We're just gonna do some
tricep extensions.
242
00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:32,180
Oh, you're walking.
243
00:09:32,223 --> 00:09:33,660
And there's color in your face.
244
00:09:33,703 --> 00:09:36,663
Yeah, I think
the last of it is out.
245
00:09:36,706 --> 00:09:38,273
The tea you made really helped.
246
00:09:38,316 --> 00:09:40,667
Aww. Thank you.
247
00:09:41,885 --> 00:09:43,713
I think it was food poisoning.
248
00:09:43,757 --> 00:09:47,021
I might have eaten some bad
Shrimp Louie yesterday.
249
00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:48,631
Not Petruzzo's.
250
00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:50,154
Petruzzo's. Oh, my God!
251
00:09:50,198 --> 00:09:52,069
That is so gross! Dan!
252
00:09:52,113 --> 00:09:54,202
They gave me back my coat
and there was a mouse
253
00:09:54,245 --> 00:09:55,856
eating a tissue in the pocket!
254
00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:57,901
I have never seen you scream
like that.
255
00:09:57,945 --> 00:10:00,556
Your face was just
an open mouth.
256
00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:03,646
Yeah, just like that. No!
257
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:09,260
I promise, next anniversary,
258
00:10:09,304 --> 00:10:10,610
I will choose a restaurant
259
00:10:10,653 --> 00:10:13,003
where the rodents stay safely
on the floor.
260
00:10:16,746 --> 00:10:18,618
Oh, the laughter,
it's j-jostling the, uh...
261
00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:20,663
warm shrimp.
262
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:22,143
Good luck up there.
263
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:33,241
♪♪
264
00:10:41,553 --> 00:10:47,168
♪♪
265
00:10:47,211 --> 00:10:52,826
♪♪
266
00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:54,610
She originally started
dating you
267
00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,960
because of
the free frozen yogurt.
268
00:10:57,004 --> 00:11:00,398
But then she fell madly in love
with me?
269
00:11:00,442 --> 00:11:02,923
Deeply, deeply, madly.
270
00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:05,403
You were all she talked about.
271
00:11:05,447 --> 00:11:06,883
And I'm done.
272
00:11:06,927 --> 00:11:09,016
Mm. Try to get out of that one.
273
00:11:09,059 --> 00:11:10,974
Yeah, okay.
274
00:11:11,018 --> 00:11:12,280
Oh.
275
00:11:12,323 --> 00:11:13,498
Oh.
276
00:11:13,542 --> 00:11:14,717
Wow.
277
00:11:14,761 --> 00:11:15,979
You're really good at this.
278
00:11:16,023 --> 00:11:17,285
You should get into kidnapping.
279
00:11:19,243 --> 00:11:21,724
So, tell me something
she said about me.
280
00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:25,467
I mean, she was just
really proud of you.
281
00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:29,471
You had such an important job,
saving people.
282
00:11:29,514 --> 00:11:33,867
Touching all those gross
body parts, all those fluids.
283
00:11:33,910 --> 00:11:35,303
That's it?
284
00:11:35,346 --> 00:11:37,784
Well, she thought you looked
great in scrubs.
285
00:11:39,133 --> 00:11:41,309
She thought you were
a superhero, you know?
286
00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:43,485
Sarah Man.
287
00:11:43,528 --> 00:11:45,226
She was really proud of you
being a doctor.
288
00:11:47,663 --> 00:11:50,579
Okay, well,
I'm gonna go bag groceries now.
289
00:11:53,060 --> 00:11:54,844
Are you mad?
I'm picking up a tone.
290
00:11:54,888 --> 00:11:57,238
You just told me Coleen was
proud of me because I was a doctor,
291
00:11:57,281 --> 00:11:59,327
and now I'm not a doctor
anymore,
292
00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:01,068
so my feelings are hurt.
293
00:12:01,111 --> 00:12:02,330
Oh.
294
00:12:02,373 --> 00:12:04,114
I'm -- I'm sorry.
295
00:12:04,158 --> 00:12:06,160
Was there anything else
she was proud of?
296
00:12:06,203 --> 00:12:09,685
I'm -- I'm sure there were
a lot of things, I just...
297
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:13,167
can't think of them right now
with you look at me like that.
298
00:12:13,210 --> 00:12:15,299
See you later, Bri.
299
00:12:17,214 --> 00:12:19,521
Oh, hey.
I think you forgot something.
300
00:12:19,564 --> 00:12:20,696
Sarah!
301
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:21,741
Sarah.
302
00:12:24,047 --> 00:12:25,179
Sarah?
303
00:12:25,222 --> 00:12:27,616
Okay.
304
00:12:27,659 --> 00:12:29,096
Hey, how was your day?
305
00:12:29,139 --> 00:12:31,794
Oh, it was, um --
My -- My day was wonderful.
306
00:12:31,838 --> 00:12:34,666
Everyone was very nice
and -- Oh, good.
307
00:12:34,710 --> 00:12:36,190
Glad you have your guitar out.
308
00:12:36,233 --> 00:12:38,888
Yeah, just grippin' and riffin'.
309
00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:41,282
Doing that thang.
310
00:12:41,325 --> 00:12:42,587
So hey, hey, hey.
311
00:12:42,631 --> 00:12:44,198
So, Mr. Higgins tells me today
312
00:12:44,241 --> 00:12:45,939
that our kids repeat
everything that we say,
313
00:12:45,982 --> 00:12:47,549
and Luke has just been
dropping bleep-bombs
314
00:12:47,592 --> 00:12:48,855
all around the playground.
315
00:12:48,898 --> 00:12:50,291
Yeah. Wonder where
he got that from.
316
00:12:50,334 --> 00:12:52,249
Yeah, well, I told him
I'd have a chat with you.
317
00:12:52,293 --> 00:12:54,295
Right, you traced
the problem back to me.
318
00:12:54,338 --> 00:12:56,253
Thank you. Okay, let's stop
319
00:12:56,297 --> 00:12:58,255
pointing fingers
at each other, okay?
320
00:12:58,299 --> 00:12:59,604
Higgins is
the real problem here.
321
00:12:59,648 --> 00:13:03,043
He's a real piece of...
sheet cake.
322
00:13:03,086 --> 00:13:06,742
So sheet cake, Luke,
is a wonderful, um, dessert
323
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:10,180
enjoyed by educators
in all countries.
324
00:13:10,224 --> 00:13:12,008
♪ You're my sheet cake, baby ♪
325
00:13:12,052 --> 00:13:14,402
♪ You got so many layers ♪
326
00:13:14,445 --> 00:13:16,012
♪ You're my sheet cake, baby ♪
327
00:13:16,056 --> 00:13:17,884
♪ You got so many layers ♪
328
00:13:17,927 --> 00:13:19,842
Alright, I gotta write
my feelings down.
329
00:13:19,886 --> 00:13:21,409
Luke, I'm borrowing
your notebook.
330
00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:23,803
We could go up on it. You could.
331
00:13:23,846 --> 00:13:26,893
♪ You're my sheet cake, baby,
you got so many layers ♪"Mr. Higgins is a real --"
332
00:13:26,936 --> 00:13:30,244
And he's that, and he's that, and he's --♪ You're
my sheet cake, baby, you ain't got any haters ♪
333
00:13:30,287 --> 00:13:32,420
Yeah, that writes itself.
334
00:13:32,463 --> 00:13:35,466
♪ Sheet cake, baby,
you got so many layers ♪
335
00:13:35,510 --> 00:13:38,208
♪ You're my sheet cake, baby,
you ain't got any haters ♪
336
00:13:38,252 --> 00:13:40,341
Oh, God.♪ You're my sheet cake
337
00:13:40,384 --> 00:13:41,951
♪ Sheet cake
338
00:13:41,995 --> 00:13:44,084
So, you know, it's great.
It's so good.
339
00:13:44,127 --> 00:13:45,781
Um, you know what
I was thinking?
340
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,697
Your playing is so delightful
that maybe we save it up
341
00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:51,265
as a surprise
and do a recital --
342
00:13:51,308 --> 00:13:52,875
You do a recital
at the end of the month.
343
00:13:52,919 --> 00:13:55,008
I mean, that's --Yeah, that's so nice.
344
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:56,792
Yeah. Yeah. I might not be ar--
345
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,707
I think, I'm looking through
my calendar right now,
346
00:13:58,750 --> 00:14:00,752
and I don't think I'm around
at the end of the month.
347
00:14:00,796 --> 00:14:05,105
I'm probably --♪ My baby's not around
at the end of the month ♪
348
00:14:05,148 --> 00:14:06,802
♪ My baby's not around
349
00:14:08,151 --> 00:14:10,023
Thank you for shopping
at Fields.
350
00:14:10,066 --> 00:14:12,025
You have a great day.
351
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:13,330
Hey, I've been trying
to call you.
352
00:14:13,374 --> 00:14:15,028
You're not picking up.
353
00:14:15,071 --> 00:14:17,291
Well, because we're
in a fight, Brian.
354
00:14:17,334 --> 00:14:18,640
Why are we in a fight?
355
00:14:18,683 --> 00:14:20,250
I'm mad at you
because I'm mad at myself
356
00:14:20,294 --> 00:14:22,949
for quitting the thing
that Coleen was most proud of.
357
00:14:22,992 --> 00:14:24,951
And it's just easier
to be mad at you.
358
00:14:24,994 --> 00:14:26,822
I get it.
Coleen used to get mad at me
359
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,650
when she was mad
at herself, too.
360
00:14:28,693 --> 00:14:30,217
Yeah, I know that.
361
00:14:30,260 --> 00:14:31,914
I remembered something
she was proud of you for.
362
00:14:31,958 --> 00:14:34,917
It's too late. Just -- What?
363
00:14:34,961 --> 00:14:36,963
She was really proud when you
ran that six-minute mile
364
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:38,790
for a high-school fitness test.
365
00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:42,316
I mean, she said it was the
fastest time that anyone did.
366
00:14:42,359 --> 00:14:44,361
I didn't do that.
367
00:14:44,405 --> 00:14:45,754
I cheated.
368
00:14:45,797 --> 00:14:48,104
I've never cheated
on anything in my life.
369
00:14:48,148 --> 00:14:50,672
I paid a girl to shave a minute
off my time.
370
00:14:50,715 --> 00:14:52,979
I was trying to impress
our gym teacher.
371
00:14:53,022 --> 00:14:54,850
Darn her beautiful breasts!
372
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:57,200
Now I'm mad at myself again,
okay?
373
00:14:57,244 --> 00:14:58,985
So just go.
374
00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:00,638
You know, I forgot,
I was gonna get some milk,
375
00:15:00,682 --> 00:15:02,771
but I'll just pick some up
at the gas station.
376
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:10,561
♪♪
377
00:15:10,605 --> 00:15:13,390
Guys, can you meet me at the
high-school track in an hour?
378
00:15:13,434 --> 00:15:15,001
I want to run the mile
in under six minutes,
379
00:15:15,044 --> 00:15:16,524
but I don't want to do it alone,
380
00:15:16,567 --> 00:15:17,829
since the girl who's been
missing for five years
381
00:15:17,873 --> 00:15:19,396
was last seen there.
382
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:22,225
♪♪
383
00:15:29,276 --> 00:15:33,889
♪♪
384
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:35,891
Oh, dear Lord. Oh, Mr. Higgins.
385
00:15:35,935 --> 00:15:37,632
You're early. Should we come back?
386
00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:39,547
This feels like
a "come back" moment.
387
00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:41,810
No, no, no, no.
Please, come in. Have a seat.
388
00:15:41,853 --> 00:15:43,594
We really need to talk
about Luke.
389
00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:48,251
Um, with
our -- with our tops off or...?
390
00:15:48,295 --> 00:15:50,210
Don't make me send you
to the principal's office.
391
00:15:50,253 --> 00:15:52,342
Why? She doing hot yoga?
392
00:15:53,648 --> 00:15:55,519
I'm just gonna get to the point.
393
00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:58,827
Uh, Luke brought in a poem
to read for show and tell.
394
00:15:58,870 --> 00:16:00,742
Aww. How about Luke.Hey. That's great.
395
00:16:00,785 --> 00:16:03,571
"Higgins is
a bleeping prude..."Oh.
396
00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:05,399
"whose bleep
is clenched so tight,
397
00:16:05,442 --> 00:16:07,749
he can make bleeping diamonds."
398
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:09,011
Non-rhyming poem.
399
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:10,926
Luke stole my notebook.
400
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,580
That is the bigger issue here.
401
00:16:12,623 --> 00:16:15,322
So you also have problems
with your W's.
402
00:16:16,714 --> 00:16:19,979
I do.
I-I-I really struggle with that.
403
00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:24,853
Look, Mr. Higgins, I'm sure you
can see the -- the humor in all of this.
404
00:16:24,896 --> 00:16:26,942
Mm-hmm. I hope you can, too.
There is more.
405
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,944
No."Henry is playing the guitar
406
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:31,251
and making that bleeping face,
407
00:16:31,294 --> 00:16:34,080
and I want to rip it off
and shove it up his bleep."
408
00:16:35,168 --> 00:16:36,430
Okay, you know what?
409
00:16:36,473 --> 00:16:37,953
I think we can say "ass,"
alright?
410
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:39,172
It's an animal,
and it was heavily featured
411
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:41,435
in the Christmas story,
if I recall.
412
00:16:41,478 --> 00:16:44,046
She didn't write "ass." I gathered that.
413
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:48,790
♪♪
414
00:16:48,833 --> 00:16:50,748
Wow, you really don't like
my guitar face.
415
00:16:50,792 --> 00:16:52,794
Oh, please do not be
so sensitive.
416
00:16:52,837 --> 00:16:54,709
Your texting face
isn't so great, either.
417
00:16:56,276 --> 00:16:59,757
Henry, that is hurtful.
I'm a lady.
418
00:16:59,801 --> 00:17:01,324
Yeah, well.
You talk like a sailor.
419
00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:02,717
You got to filter yourself.
420
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:05,111
Oh, w-- I have to filter myself?
421
00:17:05,154 --> 00:17:07,069
Are you kidding me?
You don't filter yourself.
422
00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:10,116
Yeah, I do.
I filter myself all the time.
423
00:17:10,159 --> 00:17:12,509
Morning, noon,
especially right now.
424
00:17:12,553 --> 00:17:14,468
Okay, well, some of us
aren't fake.
425
00:17:14,511 --> 00:17:15,686
This is who I am.
426
00:17:15,730 --> 00:17:17,297
Why should I change
for the kids?
427
00:17:17,340 --> 00:17:19,473
I was here first. Very mature.
428
00:17:19,516 --> 00:17:20,822
You're very mature.
429
00:17:20,865 --> 00:17:23,477
Look, no one's saying
you can't be you,
430
00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,000
just button it up
around the kids.
431
00:17:26,610 --> 00:17:28,743
I'm gonna go.
I have a guitar recital
432
00:17:28,786 --> 00:17:30,832
to practice for. Oh, lucky us.
433
00:17:30,875 --> 00:17:32,616
I love you. I love you, too.
434
00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:34,618
I have faith in you. No, don't have faith.
435
00:17:34,662 --> 00:17:36,185
Nobody needs faith.
436
00:17:37,795 --> 00:17:44,367
♪♪
437
00:17:46,326 --> 00:17:47,979
I'm binging. Don't judge me.
438
00:17:48,023 --> 00:17:50,417
Did you know you can't curse
in front of your kids?
439
00:17:50,460 --> 00:17:51,722
Well, yes.
440
00:17:51,766 --> 00:17:53,942
I mean, have you
never read one --
441
00:17:53,985 --> 00:17:55,770
I'm sorry. I was gonna say
"parenting book."
442
00:17:55,813 --> 00:17:57,076
I mean, if I knew
that I had to be
443
00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:58,599
a good influence
for these things,
444
00:17:58,642 --> 00:18:00,122
I don't -- I wouldn't have
signed up for this.
445
00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:01,863
If I had known that Dan
was gonna get food poisoning
446
00:18:01,906 --> 00:18:03,125
and remind me
of the nice Dan I married,
447
00:18:03,169 --> 00:18:04,518
I might not have kissed Matt.
448
00:18:04,561 --> 00:18:07,042
You kissed Matt? Mm-hmm.
449
00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:09,523
Are you guys gonna do it?
450
00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:11,133
I was maybe going to
if I lost eight pounds,
451
00:18:11,177 --> 00:18:12,787
which I am dangerously close to.
452
00:18:12,830 --> 00:18:15,529
Oh, you're training
for an affair. Got it.
453
00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:16,965
Shush! Shh!
454
00:18:17,008 --> 00:18:19,054
Oh, a little. I guess people can change.
455
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:20,708
I never would have pegged you
for somebody
456
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:23,145
who would put themselves first.
457
00:18:23,189 --> 00:18:24,668
Well, I never pegged you
as someone
458
00:18:24,712 --> 00:18:26,192
who would put her kids first.
459
00:18:26,235 --> 00:18:28,672
You're doin' it, girl! Great hustle!
460
00:18:28,716 --> 00:18:30,892
Look at you!
461
00:18:30,935 --> 00:18:32,372
Yeah, you know what?
I think my kids would be
462
00:18:32,415 --> 00:18:33,503
better off without me.
463
00:18:33,547 --> 00:18:36,071
I can't control myself.
464
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:37,681
Oh, my God.
465
00:18:37,725 --> 00:18:39,509
You think my kids
would be better off without me?
466
00:18:39,553 --> 00:18:40,728
I never said that.
467
00:18:40,771 --> 00:18:42,121
Yeah, but you never said
the wouldn't.
468
00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:43,426
Well, you used to not care
what I thought.
469
00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:45,124
Well, I still don't care
what you think,
470
00:18:45,167 --> 00:18:46,516
but I mean, you could blow
a little smoke up my ass.
471
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,257
Oh, shoot, am I a bad person
if I have an affair?
472
00:18:48,301 --> 00:18:49,737
Am I gonna have to say
"shoot" now
473
00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:51,478
when I slam my finger
in a drawer?
474
00:18:51,521 --> 00:18:53,175
You've got this!
475
00:18:53,219 --> 00:18:55,221
Really good hustle!
476
00:18:55,264 --> 00:18:57,005
You know what?
I'm gonna get my act together
477
00:18:57,048 --> 00:18:58,485
and I'm gonna be a good
role model for my kids,
478
00:18:58,528 --> 00:18:59,877
because you think I can't.
479
00:18:59,921 --> 00:19:01,749
You're gonna be a mother
just to spite me?
480
00:19:01,792 --> 00:19:03,403
Well, I need incentive.
481
00:19:03,446 --> 00:19:05,100
Okay.
482
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,668
I'm gonna cheat on Dan just
'cause you don't think I would.
483
00:19:07,711 --> 00:19:10,105
To spite me? Yeah.
484
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:11,367
No.
485
00:19:11,411 --> 00:19:12,586
Because it was
the greatest kiss ever,
486
00:19:12,629 --> 00:19:14,414
and he's really stinkin' hot.
487
00:19:14,457 --> 00:19:15,719
Stinkin'?
488
00:19:15,763 --> 00:19:16,807
No, I can't say "stinkin'."
489
00:19:16,851 --> 00:19:18,244
I can't. I can't do that.
490
00:19:18,287 --> 00:19:21,290
Oh, God. I need an outlet
for this anger.
491
00:19:22,726 --> 00:19:25,512
Wha-- What was my time?!
492
00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:28,341
Um, uh, what --
What were you trying to beat?
493
00:19:28,384 --> 00:19:29,603
Six minutes!
494
00:19:29,646 --> 00:19:30,560
Oh! Oh, well!
495
00:19:30,604 --> 00:19:32,432
Well, it's 5:51!Yeah!
496
00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:35,174
Yes!
497
00:19:35,217 --> 00:19:37,611
Coleen, I did it!
498
00:19:37,654 --> 00:19:40,788
I'm not a doctor anymore,
but I did the other thing!
499
00:19:45,271 --> 00:19:47,229
Well, let's go congratulate
this nutbag.
500
00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:49,013
Don't say "nutbag."
It's not PC.What?
501
00:19:49,057 --> 00:19:50,014
Don't ever say it
around your kids.
502
00:19:55,150 --> 00:19:57,196
♪ Drivin' down the highway
503
00:19:57,239 --> 00:19:59,241
♪ Drivin' so fast
504
00:19:59,285 --> 00:20:05,987
♪ The radio's on in my Pontiac
505
00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:07,249
I don't see a face.
506
00:20:07,293 --> 00:20:08,163
I don't know what
she's talking about.
507
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:09,469
Yeah?
508
00:20:09,512 --> 00:20:10,948
I just see a sexy guy
doing sexy stuff.
509
00:20:10,992 --> 00:20:12,298
Yeah, that's what I thought.
510
00:20:12,341 --> 00:20:13,603
Mind if I get in this
a little bit?
511
00:20:13,647 --> 00:20:14,909
Let me hit it.
512
00:20:14,952 --> 00:20:17,477
♪ Driving down the highway
513
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:20,001
♪ Driving so fast
514
00:20:20,044 --> 00:20:23,744
♪ Radio's on in my Pontiac ♪
515
00:20:23,787 --> 00:20:25,920
Whoo! All I see is a rock god.
516
00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:27,617
Thanks. Run this baby back?
517
00:20:27,661 --> 00:20:29,315
Let's back this up. Let's double team
this dream.
518
00:20:29,358 --> 00:20:30,577
Mm.
519
00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:33,319
♪ Driving down the highway
520
00:20:33,362 --> 00:20:35,843
♪ Driving so fast
521
00:20:35,886 --> 00:20:39,673
♪ Radio's on in my Pontiac
522
00:20:40,717 --> 00:20:41,849
Oh, man.
523
00:20:41,892 --> 00:20:43,067
Yeah, I think Lila's awake.
524
00:20:43,111 --> 00:20:45,156
Uh, she's gonna want to
hear this.
525
00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:46,680
Two, three, four.
526
00:20:46,723 --> 00:20:49,335
♪ Driving down the highway
527
00:20:49,378 --> 00:20:51,772
♪ Driving so fast
528
00:20:51,815 --> 00:20:56,646
♪ Third-row seating
in my Pontiac-ac ♪
529
00:20:56,690 --> 00:21:05,307
♪♪
530
00:21:05,351 --> 00:21:07,396
You dumb
531
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:10,443
Use your blinker
if you're gonna make a turn.
532
00:21:10,486 --> 00:21:13,315
If you're turning to the right,
use the right blinker,
533
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:16,710
you
534
00:21:16,753 --> 00:21:18,233
What's wrong with her?
535
00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:20,453
She's a role model.
536
00:21:20,496 --> 00:21:21,715
I feel better.
537
00:21:25,849 --> 00:21:30,201
♪♪
38334
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