Original subtitles

CHARLIE: 'In France, the word hotel

'does not actually mean a building offering accommodation.

'In French, it literally means a townhouse, and even here in London,

'when they pull up at our door,

'some people really do feel they're walking into a home from home.'

'Of course, at Hotel Babylon, we do our very best to foster the feeling.

'The simple truth is that the more our guests enjoy being here,

'the more they'll spend.

'Don't get me wrong, hotel staff are friendly,

'but never forget that behind the smile,

'our eyes are always on the bottom line.'

'Our heartfelt requests to guests to reuse towels

'and help save the environment is really aimed at helping us

'save a fortune in laundry bills.'

'The complementary breakfast worth 24.95 we graciously give you

'to apologise for not having your room ready costs us 25p...'

'..while earning us an additional 150

'for the deliberate double booking.

'Until recently, we made a sweet killing from guests using our phones

'in their room, but as people got wise, we've had to get smart.

'A man in his room surfing the web

'via the hotel's wireless server at �5 an hour.'

'Multiply it by 50 or 60,

'and you have a very nice little earner indeed.

'Nicer still when you consider the server costs us absolutely nothing.'

'However our guests choose to use the hotel, however imaginatively,

'for those who work here it is first and last a place of business...'

'..and woe betide the employee who forgets that any business

'can change hands in a pen stroke,

'and that their own position can be extinguished in an instant.'

They don't look like our usual insurance assessors.

Insurance companies get taken over all the time.

Are they insured against that?

You know, the level of examination they've carried out,

it's a wonder the building hasn't pressed charges

for indecent assault.

Thank you.

He's pulling in now.

What's going on?

One moment they were in a huddle over in the bar,

then one of them takes a phone call then he leads them over to the door.

Were they now stand, freaking me out.

Rebecca. Not now, Tony.

Positions, everybody.

Oh, which one? I know so many.

Behind the desk, alert, looking highly professional.

Not your favourite, then.

Tony, door.

Door. What? Door.

What? Door.

But there's nobody there. SHE SIGHS

Are you nervous?

It's business, Charlie. Just business.

Welcome to Hotel Babylon. Thank you.

How was your flight from Barcelona?

The sky was crystal clear so I sought permission

from traffic control to let me pass low over the Alps. Stunning.

Being in control of a Learjet

and a clear blue sky is among the greatest feelings in the world.

Well, I'll have to take your word for that.

This is my deputy, Charlie Edwards.

It's a pleasure to meet you, sir.

I'm sure.

Shall we go through to my office?

Why don't you show me what I'm buying?

Certainly. OK, this way.

ANNA: Good morning, sir.

Don't take this the wrong way, but is that God?

It's more important than God!

That is Donovan Credo!

Credo.

I hope you don't mind my asking,

but how much longer will your people need to complete the audit?

You're not suggesting I purchase this establishment

without knowing exactly what I'm buying?

It's just that my staff are starting to suspect

that your staff are not entirely as advertised.

You told them they're insurance assessors?

Well, our usual insurance assessors are two short, bald men

with body odour that could stun a large reptile

and a limitless supply of bad puns about the insurance industry.

My people are almost finished.

I'm just trying to imagine what sort of guests

would pay to stay in a room like this, but I'm struggling.

Well, it's a very popular suite.

Among the blind?

Once your people have completed the evaluation

and fixed a purchase price, what then?

My lawyers nail the deal and Hotel Babylon as is will cease to exist.

And its staff? I believe you already know my thoughts on that subject.

I don't.

I wondered if you'd given any thought to the proposal

I emailed this morning?

Proposal? What proposal?

I neither need nor want any of your team, Rebecca. Just you.

You told me the overwhelming majority of staff

would survive the takeover bid. Step outside, would you, Charlie?

Rebecca, you told me! Now.

Jesus! Sorry to scare you, mate.

I'll give you each a flaming torch,

you can hunt down Frankenstein's monster.

That is Donovan Credo in there, isn't it?

So?

So these humourless Teutonic types

all over the place are not insurance assessors?

HE SIGHS I'm not at liberty to say.

Your reluctance to speak itself speaks volumes.

I wondered why they weren't bald and smelly.

Credo has made his fortune by buying and converting hotels

into his own corporate brand, so is he buying and converting us?

I'm not at... Liberty to say,

the record's going round and round, Charlie,

but the needle appears to have become resolutely stuck.

Come on, Charlie, we're your friends!

If she's selling the hotel, what about us? Quite.

People, this is a management matter. Let it drop.

Did you tie your tie a little too tightly this morning, Charlie boy?

We are not people. This is as you're talking to.

Right, Mr Credo is here having a meeting with Rebecca,

it's as simple as that.

Now the last time I looked, you were all on the payroll,

so please roll back to your post and earn your pay.

I don't like you like this.

I'm just doing my job.

So was Eichmann.

Such dreadful tat.

Guests like it.

Whether guests like what you've done here is irrelevant, Rebecca.

Because in the grand scheme of things,

Hotel Babylon is decidedly old hat.

When I've transformed this building into a Credo hotel,

it will no longer merely be an environment in which people eat,

drink and sleep,

it will be an oasis of luxury

that will stand as the exemplar of the Credo brand.

We will reveal all other hotels to be the tawdry,

pick-pocketing operations they truly are.

We will be the very best for only the very best.

Only those at the very top of the A-list will be admitted,

expecting the most superior surface, executed by the most efficient,

most discreet and most elegant staff.

But the... And led

by the most beautiful and dynamic young manager in London.

My team can make that transition with me.

I see.

You'll permit me to shed a few rays of light

into the black hole that is your team.

Your concierge and head barman, quote,

"resembled two leftovers from the American porn industry circa 1983,"

while your food and beverage manager has, quote,

"the air of a bus conductor

"for whom passengers are a gross inconvenience."

Your housekeeper runs her own lost property department

like a latter-day Fagin,

while the double act you currently have installed on reception

as simply, quote, "very, very wrong".

Well, if that's how they come across to your team,

then I have to take full responsibility,

as it means I haven't pushed them to develop to their full potential.

Continue this level of self-flagellation

and you might just talk yourself out of a job.

Then let me talk myself back into it by showing you that

I can turn my stuff into your staff.

They project themselves in a way that our current guests expect,

attractive but approachable, efficient yet informal.

But give them the opportunity and I am utterly convinced

they will perfectly reflect the style

and aspirations of the typical Credo guest.

By definition, a typical Credo guest is atypical.

I have made my concessions and laid out my terms.

Those who know me understand that this means fini.

Fini.

If Credo's people are auditing the place, it only means one thing,

he's looking to buy.

I tried telling a joke to one of his serious blonde women.

It didn't dawn on you that your asinine cracks might not be funny?

What did Big Lord Fauntleroy say?

James is suggesting our jokes are not amusing.

No! This one was bloody hilarious.

How many governments have there been in Italy since the World War II?

HE LAUGHS

F...

HE LAUGHS UPROARIOUSLY

52.

Hilarious, Gino.

Donovan Credo.

At last working for someone with true vision.

Oh, yes, hello, I know that this is short notice but I was wondering

whether you could squeeze me in this lunchtime.

Madam, sirs, welcome to Hotel Babylon.

Oh, magic. Look, Mam, they've got a doorman and everything!

Er, concierge, sir. Poncey what?

You can't be guests!. We won a competition.

Had my question been, did you win a competition,

that would have been the correct answer.

Mam here won us two nights in a top London hotel

for getting a question right in a daytime phone in.

What is a snowman made of?

And you answered correctly?

Initially, I thought it was a trick question, but then I said to myself,

"No, Myra, stick to what you know," and que sera sera.

SHE LAUGHS

And here we are.

And here you are, indeed.

Larger than life and in full techni-odour.

If we ever end up admitting those types to a Credo establishment,

you have my full permission to drown me in one of my own Jacuzzis.

Those types are guests, sir.

For which you have my intense sympathy.

Wow.

It's like a really, really well-designed whorehouse.

What's going on?

I have to sack them, Charlie.

What?

When Credo takes control of the hotel, he wants to gut the building,

decor and management.

I argued the case for keeping my team,

he said I could retain just two.

HE SIGHS

A bit previous, isn't he?

He doesn't even own the place yet.

So what are you gonna do?

Be as straight and as fair as I can to those we have to lose.

And they are?

You're the first on my list of the two to keep,

on the condition that you tell me who has to go.

You must be joking!

Since you arrived at Hotel Babylon,

I've watched you move through the hotel

in your Charlie-shaped bubble, pally with everyone.

But now they're facing the axe

and we have to make the hardest choice a manager can make.

Sacking people.

Friends who don't deserve it.

Now, I know that I can make those judgements, but can you?

You're asking me to prove myself as a manager

by sacking members of our team for this arsehole?

No, what I'm asking is for you to recognise

what is quite possibly the defining moment of your career.

This is bollocks.

This is what you have to be capable of

if you want to work in the highest level in this industry.

At the highest level, you look down and you don't see people any more,

just numbers in columns.

So what's it going to be?

Are you only ever up for a good time, Charlie,

or have you got what it takes to cut the really hot mustard?

If you'd rather not write a list of who has to go,

then just bring me the name of the one who gets to stay.

THEY SHOUT

What is going on? I can hear you at the other end of the corridor!

Is it true hotel's being sold?

What?

Myra here says she heard downstairs that hotel's being sold

and we all going to lose our jobs.

I say don't be stupid, but she says it's all over the hotel.

If that were true, how come I haven't heard anything of the sort?

SHE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE

SHE REPLIES IN OWN LANGUAGE

She says maybe you not in the loop.

I know.

I know. I'll do my best to get the figures you need.

KNOCKING

Can I have a word?

Not now, Jackie.

What?

I said not now.

It's really important.

I said not now!

Some of the girls upstairs have been spooked by a rumour that apparently

the hotel's up for sale and everybody's gonna lose their jobs.

I just tried speaking to Rebecca

but she practically threw me out of the room.

What's going on? Nothing.

Is the hotel about to change hands?

There's interest.

Is everybody gonna lose their jobs?

Absolutely not.

'Scuse.

She's not gonna let you in.

Who is it? It's Charlie.

Come in.

Do you have a name?

HE CLEARS THROAT

Do we really have to do this?

Yes, I'm afraid we really do have to do this.

It's called a management clear out.

More like a slaughter.

Let me see who you want to keep.

I thought so.

Then let's get on with it.

As the hotel gossip, if you don't know about something

then generally it's not worth knowing about, right?

I think I can take that as a compliment.

If it was me, I wouldn't, but let's not get bogged down with semantics

or questions of personal dignity right now.

PHONE RINGING Excuse me.

Hello, reception?

Oh, hello, Rebecca, yes, he's just dealing with a guest at the moment.

Is there anything I can do? OK, sure. Bye.

Sorry, you were not wanted to get bogged down?

This rumour about the hotel being sold.

Oh, Ben, Rebecca wants to see you in her office.

When? Now.

What about?

Well, I don't know, she didn't go into details.

OK, are you sure you can manage by yourself?

Yes, it's better than carrying your all shift. Go on.

So, what do you want to know?

Well, what's the gossip?

ECHOING: Gossip... Gossip...

We're about to become part of Credo's empire.

I mean, it should be great, right?

I've always wanted to work for Donovan Credo.

Prestige, the travel, the clothes.

The shoes. What?

All of Credo's staff get custom-made calf leather shoes.

KNOCKS

REBECCA: Come in.

Oh! Fabulous.

Why me?

Ben, let me assure you, it's not just you.

But I'm the first. Someone had to be.

Right. Just like Star Trek.

Ben... Star Trek? Who's the first crew member

to get shot or eaten? Whoa, don't even start to go there.

They're black. It's a management clear-out.

This has absolutely nothing to do with colour.

We had to start somewhere.

Oh, so says the white man sitting on the boss's side of the table.

You're bang out of order, son, and you know it.

If you want to take the rest of the day off, Ben, I do understand.

If not, then I would ask you to keep this to yourself

so as not to cause panic amongst the rest of the staff,

just until I've informed them of their position.

I'll stay.

Thank you for behaving so professionally.

Though not professional enough for Donovan Credo.

I'm sorry, Ben.

So what happened?

Ben?

OK, gay men are biologically incapable of keeping secrets.

Well, apart from the secret about being gay

which you all seem to be able to keep for ages.

Maybe that's why you're not so good at keeping the others

because after finally bursting out of the closet...

For the rest of the day, just leave me alone.

Please.

OK.

If that's what you want.

Yeah, it is.

I don't understand.

Surely I'd be perfect in the Credo setup?

I have a proven expertise in wine.

I have an encyclopaedic knowledge of every major cuisine.

I did everything in my power to persuade him to take you with him.

Then your power is obviously insufficient.

Again, I am...

Sorry. Yes, you've already said that.

You're terribly, terribly sorry. Well, that doesn't help me, does it,

cos I will still be redundant when this place becomes his place.

I felt at home here.

I like knowing where I am.

And frankly, I'm too damn long in the tooth to have to find

yet another birth and start all over again in this bloody business.

Oh, God.

Forgive me.

Take your time, mate.

Rebecca, please...

don't do this to me.

James, if there was anything I could have done...

Don't talk as though an irrevocable decision

has been made and my name has already been cast to the past tense!

I'm begging you. Rebecca, please, I'm absolutely begging you.

James, please don't.

This place is my life.

James, stand up.

I can't.

HE SOBS

So as well as winning two nights in a top London hotel,

we got tickets to see a top London show.

Right. Only Mam and Dad would prefer to stay in their room,

see, and watch the big telly.

Oh, that's fair enough.

Big screen plasma entertainment at the foot of your king-size bed

versus Wayne Sleep leaping around in a pair of tights and a plastic nose,

I know where I'd rather be.

Right, so you'd like me to get rid of these for you?

Well, I was hoping to swap them.

OK. For another top London show?

For a top London prostitute.

Wouldn't you rather see Mamma Mia?

Mate, as long as she's got big knockers, I'm bothered.

OK.

Leave it with me.

OK. OH, and Chinese-y.

Chinese-y? Yeah. Hmm.

Yeah? Sure.

Big knockers and Chinese-y.

But you don't get that in a Donovan Credo establishment.

Come on, Tony.

If they can pay, they can play, if they can pay, they can play.

Ni hao ma.

Jimmy. Tony.

'At Hotel Babylon when the staff are happy,

'the bookings plentiful and the place is buzzing,

'our team spirit is so strong you can almost taste it

'as a separate odour in the carefully perfumed air.

'For then everything in our garden is rosy,

'and everybody's cup truly runneth over.

'As far as the staff are concerned,

'at such times it's all for one and one for all.'

'But when spirits are down,

'when uncertainty stalks the cheaply painted corridors

'behind the facade...'

'..well, then, it's all for one

'and every man and woman for him and herself.'

They're gonna nail us all, he reckons.

No, not us.

We are the workers. We are good people, eh?

Anna, do you honestly think looking like one of Credo's minions

will predispose him towards keeping you on?

When in Rome.

When my great uncle was in Rome during the war,

he did like the Romans, he dress up like the people in power.

And when the mob hang Il Duce like a pig,

they shot my great uncle in the head.

Did he die?

They shot him in the head, Anna.

What, you think he get up, say goodbye to his brains

and pot for a cappuccino? Hey?

Ha ha, ha ha (!) It's the blonde thing, definitely.

THEY LAUGH

DOOR OPENS

Jackie.

Rebecca would like to see you.

Hold my hand?

Jackie...

This reminds me of the day I came in for my interview.

This isn't like then, is it?

No.

If Donovan Credo think that I don't know

all about the latest cocktails, he has another think again.

Does he not know that I search the worldwide interweb nearly every day

for the latest drinks and cocktails, and that I have my own weblog?

WW dot on the lash with gino.com.

SOBS

You're a terrific receptionist, Anna,

you'll find another position in no time.

But my hair!

It suits you.

Do you know how much it cost

to get a wig of this quality at such short notice?

Please don't cry.

I'm not, it's just these contacts.

SHE CRIES

DOOR OPENS

Rebecca, something's kicked off. What's going on?

Oh, I see.

What a bloody mess! Kicked off where?

Upstairs, something royal.

Oh! All I need!

You should be fighting our corner.

Hey, we're all on the same side here, mate.

Charlie.

Look after her.

OK. All right.

We should have waited until the sale of the hotel was finalised

before we started telling people.

The last thing I need right now, Charlie, is you losing your bottle.

I'm not losing my bottle, you idiot.

You are losing all perspective on what's going on here!

SHOUTING

Jackie!

Jackie!

Jackie!

Jackie.

Jackie?

Jack?

No Jack in here, love. I'm so sorry.

ALL SHOUTING

Jackie!

Jackie?

I specifically remember asking you not to say anything.

When I came upstairs they knew me

well enough to see that there was something wrong.

You should have made something up!

Rebecca, I'd never lie to my staff.

It's the only way I can ever expect them to never lie to me.

RINGING

What?

The kitchen's up in arms.

I don't know what started it, but you'd better tell Rebecca

to do something about it before all hell breaks loose.

Yeah!

Like now.

SHOUTING

Please calm down!

THEY SHOUT

Please. If you calm down,

I will tell you exactly what the current situation is.

What do you expect? Listen, please. Listen.

If you don't listen, how can I tell you what's going on?

Listen!

Enough!

Please.

Hey, listen.

NOISE STOPS MAN: Tell us!

Thank you.

OK. You understandably wanna know if the rumour

about the possible sale of the hotel is true.

SHOUTING

Would be nice. OK. It is.

THEY SHOUT

Please.

Donovan Credo, he...

he's seeking to buy the hotel

and rebrand it as one of his own. However, he has not bought it yet.

Nevertheless, Credo's made his money in the boutique end of the market,

right? Style is everything to this guy.

But let's not lose sight of the fact that beneath his pretentious design,

his expensive gloss, at the end of the day, he still needs people.

He needs people to make and serve the food,

to clean and change the linen, to polish the floors,

people to do all the jobs in this place that

make it hum like a well-oiled machine.

So however many blondes in fashionable dresses

he puts behind the front desk, end of the day,

he knows the real people, the most important grafters,

are the people behind the scenes, women and men like you.

Loyalty!

Credo's people are near to completing due diligence

prior to purchase, which means that we...

Christ's sake, talk in their language.

Nothing is finalised.

The situation is finely balanced at the moment.

There's more to...

Look, it's a very difficult time,

but you will be kept informed of developments.

In the meantime, let's not forget our professionalism,

and more importantly, the paying guests we've got in the hotel now.

Thank you for listening. Please, let's get back to work.

ALL TALK AT ONCE

They don't care about us! I think you've made your point.

OK?

Oh, that was close. What did you mean back there?

When?

After you said the situation was finely balanced at the moment,

you started to say something else and then you stopped yourself.

Did I?

Yeah, you started to say there's more to. More to what?

More to life then banding together and sticking up for your rights?

More to it than this situation than you're actually letting on? What?

Don't think I've forgotten what you called me upstairs, Charlie,

because I haven't.

Well, you're avoiding the question. That's nice. Rebecca!

Rebecca, Donovan Credo's just arrived.

Bring Tony to my office in ten minutes.

You've not answered my question.

Mr Credo!

Mr Credo, I just wanted to tell you how much respect

I have for your work in taking the hotel industry to new heights

and to tell you that I have experience...

Why are you dressed like that? You look like Myra Hindley.

Myra Hindley?

What on Earth possessed you to do that?

If the situation had spiralled even more beyond your control,

it would have threatened everything I'm working to achieve.

They were asked to keep the information to themselves.

And because you asked, they will? I trust them to keep their word.

It's spineless management.

And not what I would have expected from someone of your calibre.

It's sentimentality of the most repellent order.

No.

Not sentimentality. Loyalty.

In my book, they're one and the same.

Well, perhaps you should get a different book.

The people who work for me are loyal colleagues and friends.

Do not ever use the word friends

in relation to employees in front of me again.

My people deserve to know where they stand as soon as I do.

HE SCOFFS

You keep talking about people.

In my organisation, we do not have people.

In my organisation, we have me,

and the means by which what I want is brought into effect.

With the greatest respect, this is still my organisation,

and in my opinion,

I think I get more out of my people when they are treated decently.

Rebecca, when I want your opinion,

I will run a wet finger tip around the rim of an empty wine glass

and get it.

We're in a private meeting. Yes?

If now's not a good time... No, it's fine.

I have Tony waiting.

Tell him I'll be two minutes.

Right.

For your information, Charlie advised waiting to inform them

until the sale was finalised.

Then perhaps I should consider Charlie

for the new manager's position instead of you.

Perhaps you should.

As soon as I know anything, I promise you I'll let you know

then you can advise all your team, OK?

Charlie?

Um...

I know that I probably shouldn't ask,

but I can't help wanting to know why Credo wouldn't take me.

Well, because you're funny, you're individual,

you're unpredictable, all the things that Credo hates.

So the hair, you really think it suits me?

Well, call me perverse, but I've always preferred

pictures of Marilyn Monroe before she went peroxide.

Less calculated, less iconic, perhaps, but more attractive.

That's...

That's just so much better.

Thank you.

Well, like I said, the sale hasn't gone through yet.

Yeah, but we both know that you think it will.

I'm gonna really miss working with you.

Me, too.

Tony, earlier this morning, Donovan Credo made it quite clear that

when he takes over the hotel, he wants a clean sweep of management.

Yeah, but he usually takes the existing manager.

They know the building.

As he has offered to on this occasion.

You accepted?

I managed to persuade him as a gesture of goodwill to

let me keep two of my team.

So number one is Charlie.

Mm-hmm.

Number two, let me guess...

Jackie.

You.

I can keep you and Charlie.

I went to a Credo hotel once.

Cup of tea.

See what all the fuss was about.

Cup of tea was very nice, pricey, but it was nice,

but the longer I sat there, the more uncomfortable I felt.

Well, expensive seats aren't always the most relaxing.

No, it wasn't just the seats.

Everywhere I turned, I caught myself out the corner of my eye in a mirror

and I couldn't move for seeing this ugly mug

gaining under the weight of my own self-consciousness.

Not a pretty sight.

I had to leave my expensive tea. I practically ran out of the door.

Tony, this could be a really big opportunity for you.

Well, call me old-fashioned,

but my idea of a hotel is no fashion fascists on the door.

If you can pay, you can stay.

Cre4do's hotels attract a very high-end clientele.

Yeah, like flies to shit.

No.

Thank you for the offer, Rebecca, but no thanks.

Also, if, as seems to be the case,

that my colleagues are for the old heave-ho,

I think you should take this little chat

as effective notice of my resignation.

This place won't be the same without me and you know it.

Tony, the wealth that will pass through those doors

is almost unimaginable.

I mean, think of the tips.

Now I'm actually offended.

Thank you.

You said me and Charlie.

Yeah.

Charlie said yes?

He sees it as too good an offer to refuse.

Here's Tony now. Where's Charlie?

He's having an early supper in the staff canteen, I think.

1974, Denis Law, played for?

Er, Man City.

Last game of the season against? Man United, his old club.

His old club.

Club that made him. The club that all his old pals played for.

Law scored, sending United down.

I know. Everyone knows. Is there a point to this, mate,

or have you just been reading an old annual?

The point is, when that ball rolled towards him,

he could have stepped over it, saved his old club from the drop,

but he didn't.

He went for personal glory, and I wondered how that felt.

Knowing that he'd stabbed all his old friends in the back.

I've no idea.

Now, are you absolutely sure about that?

Denis?

Say my name. Say my name.

Now.

Charlie.

Don't forget it.

Yes, of course. No, absolutely.

DOOR OPENS

Hold on. What the hell do you think you're doing?

You're going to tell me what's going on right now or I'm quitting.

You and Credo, you can fight this out alone.

I want to file a complaint for assault.

Jesus Christ, what happened to you?

That prick just hit me. This prick provoked me.

You didn't answer my question. Is it true, you hit him?

I called him a name.

What name? Denis.

Why did you call him Denis? He knows why.

If I called you Dennis, would you punch me?

I didn't punch him because he called me Denis.

Are you going to tell me what I'm asking or shall I clear my locker?

Right, are you OK?

Yeah, I'm fine.

You go patch yourself up.

You, come with me.

Lucky punch. Look it was your head. And not something important.

Where are we going?

To the only really private place in the entire hotel.

Surely our office is.

No, Credo's people have put listening devices in there. What?

And in the staff locker room, staff canteen,

the bar and God alone knows where else.

How else did he know to turn up so soon after the riot upstairs?

Right, I'm going to be quick cos I don't want the Fire Brigade

being called out to rescue us. Right.

While Credo's lawyers have been ploughing through the paperwork

to buy this place, a small faction of our board

has secretly risen up to stop the entire chain ending up in his hands.

How?

By trying to sell the whole business to the Japanese. The Japanese?

To give our faction time to make the Japanese an offer

they couldn't refuse, I was asked to stall Credo's plans

as much as possible without arousing suspicion,

so when he told me he planned to fire my entire management team,

I saw my chance.

Still lost.

BEEPING

I persuaded him to let me keep two of you

and then inform those who weren't going to make it,

knowing that alarm would quickly spread, causing confusion and...

Delay. Couldn't seem deliberate.

Had to look like an error of judgement on my part or he could

cry foul and call in the regulators, at which point we're screwed.

You could have told me. As I just said, it had to look authentic.

I stood up in front of all of them and went to bat for you.

I know, and I'm sorry. But I couldn't see any other way.

Could have trusted me. The risk was too great. Keep up.

Jesus, what is all this? Payroll data.

Invoices, past and present contract with contractors, suppliers, banks,

spreadsheets, margin forecast, tax breaks. How many of these are there?

Four trolley loads. Rebecca, what's going on?

You and I are working through the night

to unearth anything to help the Japanese complete due diligence

in record time. If we don't unearth anything?

If we don't, then Hotel Babylon is owned by Donovan Credo,

we all get the sack

and he makes sure we never work in this industry again.

One way or another, by 9am tomorrow, we'll know.

'Some people stay at Hotel Babylon 26 weeks of the year

'and regard it as a home from home.'

'But we who are at the hotel 52 weeks of the year never do.'

'We never mistake it for home

'and yet the feeling of being part of a family is often stronger here

'than with our own flesh and blood.'

'For a family is what we are.'

'Here, for instance, we have the younger siblings.'

Hello, welcome to Hotel Babylon.

'Here, the highly strung older brother.

'The reliable, worldly uncle.'

'The more exciting other uncle who sails close to the wind.'

'The big sister you've always dreamed of.

'And there's this bloke,

'authoritarian father figure generating respect through fear,

'or the family friend who's always got a quid

'and a daily joke for the kids...

'manager or the perennial deputy?'

Right, you know what needs to be done here. Gut it and brand it.

Extend the foyer into the forecourt.

Forecourts are so mid-'90s.

This absence is really remarkably shoddy of Rebecca.

Not at all what I expect. Mr Credo.

Do you know how highly I value punctuality?

In my book, punctuality of my staff is second only to loyalty.

Well, if I was or was ever going to be a member of your staff,

I might bear that in mind. As I'm not, I don't think I'll bother.

You stupid, stupid girl.

So when all's said and done, you just want to be mediocrity?

And I was going to put you in charge of the best hotel in London.

I already am. Oh, come on!

You'd expect to see more convincing decor in Elton John's bathroom.

This place is a joke.

The staff's a tawdry mob, the guests an unamusing joke.

These people are genetically closer to chimpanzees

than they are to any guests I'd want.

Chimpanzees are my favourite animal.

I'm sorry, am I meant to be astonished by this?

There's no airs and graces in a chimpanzee,

they look after one another.

So if that remark was supposed to be clever,

you've hit very wide of the target.

Come on, Man, Dad, let's go.

See you next time.

Cheers for that. Get something special.

It's my pleasure, sir. Thanks ever so much.

You could have moved up, up and away, from people like this.

Their money is as good as anyone else's.

Beyond money, there is such a thing as class.

At Hotel Babylon,

we never distinguish between guests on the basis of class.

Provided they can settle their bill,

the Babylon experience is enjoyed by everyone.

And we treat everyone like royalty.

You will be hearing from me.

Oh, God, I do hope not.

You will all be hearing from me!

Not now!

I want a management meeting in my office in 30 minutes.

I know it's been a horrible couple of days,

but now that you've heard my explanation

I hope you understand why it was necessary

for events to have proceeded the way that they did.

I know some of you will question or even disagree with my strategy,

but... I'm sorry, can I go now?

What?

I'd like to go back to work.

I think we all would.

Yes, of course.

One last word before you go.

Thank God for the Japanese, eh?

My one last word.

I should have apologised.

Yeah.

They'll back to you. You saved the hotel.

Impossible without you.

Charlie, why don't you make yourself comfortable and I'll pop home,

have a shower and change?

OK, I'll take care of everything until you get back.

HE SIGHS

Rebecca!

Rebecca!

What's going on?

You saw the email?

You want the job?

It's already taken.

As a manager, you know when you've lost the trust of your staff.

There's no colder feeling in the world.

No, after what I put them through, they won't accept me back.

They can't. You've just gotta give 'em time.

I don't have it to give.

What's that supposed to mean?

This business has taken my marriage

and most of the best years of my life.

I want to make the most of what's left.

Don't walk away like this.

This is the perfect way.

Hotel needs you.

From where I'm standing, the hotel has all it needs.

Bye, Charlie.

Good luck.

REBECCA: 'What is a hotel?

'A hotel is a place to stay,

'a refuge from real life,

'but sooner or later, real life catches up with all of us,

'demanding our full attention.

'When that happens, we had best take heed

'and step aside for those coming up behind.'

'And just remember, the next time you check in anywhere,

'it's not the decor or the big telly in your room,

'or the innumerable little extras that make your stay memorable.

'You're paying through the nose for all that.

'No, what makes your stay memorable, what makes you come back,

'are the people.

'Cheers.'

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