Original subtitles

(no audio)

(suspenseful music)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

- [Man] Wake up, Leonard.

(birds twittering)

(birds twittering)

(wind howling)

(suspenseful music)

(wind howling)

(suspenseful music continues)

Wake up.

Leonard,

wake

up.

(suspenseful music continues)

Wake up, Leonard.

(water babbling)

Leonard.

Wake

up.

(cellphone buzzing)

(suspenseful music)

- Oh fuck.

Oh fuck.

(suspenseful music continues)

Hey.

Can you leave?

- [Man] Uh, yeah.

- All right. The movers are coming, you know.

Um...

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

You know, it's like,

you always think you're gonna have more time than you do.

Nice to meet you.

(groans) Ah, fuck!

(suspenseful music continues)

(Leonard exhales)

(suspenseful music)

- [Mover] Just move a little, move a little to the left.

- I am blessed with this life. - I am blessed with this life.

- Today I am my highest self. - Today I am my highest self.

(suspenseful music)

Come on.

(suspenseful music continues)

(object grinding)

(hammer tapping)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

Hey, Orla, exclamation point. Just leaving my new place.

See you at my old place, not the new one. Period.

Please bring those boxes. Period.

Hope you are awake and not asleep still. Period.

Sorry about the typos.

(message alert dings)

- Your, um, vitamins are really dusty.

- This goes with that.

- [Orla] Oh.

- [Leonard] Ow, ow, ow!

- Are you okay? - Yeah.

- So how are you feeling about your birthday tomorrow?

- Fine. - Oh my god.

Today is your birthday eve.

Your born day eve. Today is your "Bourne Identity."

- Are you high?

- It'll help me clean and, like, work faster

if I can really understand

what we're doing here on a deeper level.

- Today is my "Bourne Identity"?

- Yeah, it's your born identity.

- Okay.

That's kind of a lot, you know what I mean?

That was a very violent movie.

- Hey, well, violence in and of itself

is not exactly a problem.

- Violence in it. What do you mean?

Violence is terrible!

- Eh.

Louise Bourgeois says, like, sculpture is violent,

'cause you're taking something that is, you know, one way,

and you're saying, "No, you're gonna be like this,

this other way."

And you know-

- That's a different kind of violence

than when you're killing people,

because you don't know who you are,

which is basically what's going on.

I don't know who I am, and I feel like I'm killing people.

- I think it- - Wait.

No, yeah, that's it.

- Okay, I think you're taking

the "Bourne Identity" thing too literally.

It's like, I don't mean the movie, per se.

It's just that, like,

birthday, born day- - I think you and I are both

taking different pieces of this conversation literally,

and they're different pieces.

You are talking about "The Bourne Identity" as a, as a...

Wait, what are you talking about?

- [Orla] It's like six of one, half a dozen of the other.

Born, Bourne. - Orla, or we have no time.

- Okay, okay. I'm in the zone.

I'm in the zone because "Bourne Identity."

It's like (vocalizes "Mission: Impossible" theme).

- Do I want these? No.

Wait, no. This is all wrong. - I don't think

this one's gonna fit.

- Well, we have to move that one here, and then-

- Wait a minute. - What?

- You can't get rid of this.

I can, and I want.

I'm not gonna hang- - Mom gave this to us.

- onto the past.

I know, but I...

You can have it.

- We...

I already have this one. I don't want two of these.

Well, I don't want one of them, so just...

Sorry, Mom! I'm sorry!

I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry!

Good, good, let's just fucking...

All right. - Bye, Mom.

- Goodbye. - Bye, Mom. Love you.

- [Savannah] It's easy to love yourself.

- It's easy to love myself.

- [Savannah] It's fun to love yourself.

- It's fun to love myself.

Why are you right on my ass?

- [Savannah] It's fun to love yourself.

- It's fun to love myself.

- [Savannah] It's fun to love yourself.

It's fun to love yourself.

It's fun to love yourself.

It's fun.

(child laughing)

(upbeat music)

(child laughing)

- Hey.

- [Mother] Are you okay baby? Are you okay?

- Yeah, yeah, just, um, you know,

I ordered like 15 minutes ago, and I was just kinda like,

"Gotta go," you know?

- Oh, I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to my baby.

- Oh, yeah. (chuckles)

(upbeat music)

It's a cute baby.

- Thanks.

Are you okay?

- Yeah, yeah.

Just clearly, I'm just not getting enough attention.

- Leonard. - Thank you.

Whoa.

Oh!

(truck reverse alarm beeping) Hmm. Yum!

What the hell?

No, you go.

(truck reverse alarm beeping) (object clatters)

- [Savannah] I see the good in all.

- It needs to be more to the center.

Pull it a little toward the house. Yeah.

'Cause it's not really in the middle, and it's not...

Yeah, and make sure the tails are hanging down from the...

And make sure it's... (upbeat Christmas music)

- Is that good? - Yeah, push,

push it down a little in the middle.

Yeah.

Make sure the drapes match each other.

Are you putting up a tree?

- Um, nah, I don't think so.

- Are you okay?

- Am I okay?

- You just seem a little less effervescent than usual.

- No, I'm just, I'm just a little out of it, but you know,

I just kind of woke up on the wrong side of the butt.

The bed.

- Are you seeing anybody?

- Um...

No. No one.

No one serious since, you know, he who must not be texted.

- Well, there's that guy in my acting class.

- Oh yeah?

- Yeah. He has a podcast for, you know, LGBT people.

And, um- - Oh, nice.

- You would like him. Only thing is he's a little bit old.

- How old? - But he's real cute.

I think 54.

But he's really cute.

Anyway, I wouldn't know he was 54 if he didn't tell me.

I mean,

he did mention that he was 54 at the beginning of the class.

But he, I think he's single, and I think he's nice.

- A podcast is good.

- Yeah. You know, like I tell you, it'll be a sign.

- [Leonard] Yeah. What the hell?

- Just when you least expect it.

- Yeah. (cellphone dings)

- [Christo] Hey, Leonard, long time no see. What's up?

- So you get the idea.

I'm gonna go inside and do some other stuff,

but you can- - I...

- I'm gonna, I have to run to the bathroom really quick.

- Okay.

And then I'm gonna go inside and work on some other stuff.

(suspenseful music)

- "Hey, Leonard, long time no see. What's up?"

(Leonard sighs)

Hey.

Exclamation point.

Uh, yeah.

No, delete, delete, delete.

Uh, yeah, no, shit.

Um, how are you?

No. Yeah, me too.

Miss you.

No. Okay, chill, chill, chill.

(suspenseful music continues)

Not much. How are you, stranger?

No, delete "stranger."

Delete.

(suspenseful music continues)

(cellphone dings)

- [Christo] I'm good. Would love to catch up sometime soon.

(Leonard chuckles)

- Yeah.

Would love to catch up.

Tonight, question mark.

Send. Oh shit!

Tonight?

(suspenseful music continues)

What are you doing? What are you doing?

(cellphone dings)

- [Christo] Tonight is perfect. Edendale?

- Oh my god. - Lol!

- Fuck Edendale. Period.

Just kidding. That's perfect.

(cellphone dings) - Haha! Lol!

- Can't wait.

- [Christo] Blinky face.

- It's tonight. 6:00 PM tonight.

Oh my god!

(bicycle rattling)

- Hey, Leonard.

- Hey, Jerry.

- [Jerry] What you doing?

- Oh, just working for your grandma.

- [Jerry] Cool.

- Cool.

- [Jerry] Are you okay?

(suspenseful music)

- Hey, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait.

Jerry, Jerry, come here, come here.

- Yeah?

- Well, do I seem not okay?

- Your vibe's just a little bit off.

- Just a little bit off?

- Kinda.

- Oh my god. I'm not Okay.

- It's fine. It's okay to not be okay, Leonard.

- No, I know it's okay to not be okay,

but I can't afford to not be okay today, okay?

- Okay. What's happening today?

- Well, I just made plans with an old friend,

and it's just kind of important that I be okay,

or that I seem okay, 'cause I am okay.

You know, I've been doing really, really good lately,

so I just, you know, it'd be great if I was doing great,

but I'd settle for okay.

(suspenseful music continues)

Do you think maybe I should just cancel?

- No, canceling's, canceling's lame, Leonard.

- Lame.

Lame.

Lame. - Okay.

- Hey, wait, wait, wait. Jerry, Jerry, Jerry.

Jerry, come back here.

- Hmm?

- What should I wear?

- Um, something multicolored, I think.

- Yeah, something multicolored.

- Yeah.

- (sighs) Okay.

(Jerry sighs)

- Hey, wait, wait, Jerry.

- Yeah? - Jerry.

Do you ever feel like

everything bad in the world is your fault?

- No.

- Okay.

- Oh, Leonard, I was watching Jake's TikTok,

and, um, Christo was on there.

Yeah, 'cause he does these makeup tutorials,

and he did one on Christo, and it was like-

- You follow Jake?

- Yeah, he does some for some celebrities sometimes.

- That's so cool.

- [Jerry] Ariana Grande one time.

- I think they probably broke up.

- They seemed really happy on the TikTok I watched.

- Yeah.

- Yeah. I mean, it was a few days old.

They could've broken up in a few days.

- Yeah.

- See you, Leonard.

- Okay, bye.

♪ Multicolored, multicolored shirt. ♪

♪ Multi, multicolored shirt ♪

- Hey, Leonard, you okay?

- Yes!

Shirt. Multicolored shirt.

Gotta get a shirt. Multicolored shirt.

Multicolored shirt.

Hey, Fiona. Exclamation point.

I'm here for the shirt. I'm standing outside.

Send. (cellphone dings)

(fence rattles)

- [Fiona] Hello!

- [Leonard] Hello!

Hi! - Look who I brought.

Oh, wee! - Aw!

(both chuckle)

Wait, so wait, what? How was the rest of last night?

- Oh, he's upstairs.

- What? The bearded guy?

- Yes. - The bartender.

- Yeah. - What?

- I know. He's making your breakfast.

- What.

Breakfast? - I know.

- Oh my god. That's kind of a late breakfast.

So you guys have just been, like,

in bed? - Oh, shut up.

- You've been in bed with breakfast and a bearded bartender?

- Okay, shut up.

- Is that too...

That's multicolored, right?

- Yeah.

- [Leonard] But is it?

- [Fiona] What are you wearing this to tonight?

- Um, nothing.

So I'm meeting up with Christo later.

- On your birthday eve?

That's how you wanna spend- - Well, maybe he wants to-

Maybe he wants to wish me happy birthday.

I mean, we know what it's really about.

He clearly, he got bored.

He dumps Jake. That's what he always does.

And he runs back to me. It's our thing.

(Fiona sighs)

But I'm not gonna fall for it this time.

- Mm-hmm?

- [Leonard] I'm gonna be like...

- Mm-hmm?

- "No thanks."

I'm gonna walk out of there feeling good,

and then he's gonna remember that he's the one

who's obsessed with me.

- Mm-hmm. - Because he is.

I'm the only person in his life who's interesting.

- I say this with love.

- Uh-huh. - Okay?

- Yeah. - So I hope you can hear this.

You're gonna go home.

- [Leonard] Uh-huh.

- You're gonna light a candle.

- [Leonard] Yeah.

- You're gonna get into bed.

- Ooh! Well that the bed is, like, on the floor.

- You're gonna get on the floor.

You're gonna play some nice, soothing music.

You're gonna spritz some essential oils in your aura,

and you're going to meditate.

- Meditate! - Meditate

- Meditate, that is what I have been saying

that I need to do. - Yes! Yes!

- Because apparently my vibe is off.

- Yeah, it's off.

- Okay. - Okay.

So you're gonna-

- Okay, yeah. - Yeah. Yeah.

- And then, and then, and then maybe I'll cancel,

but I probably shouldn't, 'cause that would be lame.

- Says who?

- That's what the signs are telling me.

- [Fiona] Okay, so...

- The children.

- Just meditate on it.

Okay? The answers will come to you.

- I love you so much.

- I love you.

- Meditate. Go home.

Meditate. Relax.

Get the vibe in. That's what we do.

Okay.

Gonna chill out.

Gonna meditate and chill out.

(suspenseful music) (keys rattling)

No.

Yes!

(Leonard sighs)

(suspenseful music continues)

(Leonard sighs)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard inhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(wind howling)

(Leonard exhales)

(mysterious music)

(birds twittering)

(knocking at door)

(knocking at door)

(knocking at door)

Fuck!

Hello? (knocking at door)

Hello?

- It's me, the Christmas spirit.

I've come. I've come just for you.

- What is that? What are you doing?

- Oh

my god!

It's so good!

- What are you doing here?

- Well, I'm here to help.

Oh my god, the pictures do not do this place justice.

- Orla, I just need- - This looks so good.

- I just need a second.

- God, this crystal. - I'm just a little off.

Can you...

I just need 10 minutes.

I'm gonna meditate, and then I'll be back, okay?

Make yourself at home.

- Okay, I'll- - I'm gonna shut this door.

- Okay, I'll be out here.

Oh, my sweater.

(Leonard sighs)

(Leonard clears throat)

(Leonard inhales)

- Ah.

Surrender, Leonard, surrender.

Surrender.

(tranquil music) (birds twittering)

(door opens)

- Uh, Leonard.

- I'm, uh, just 10 minutes, okay?

- Just real quick. Don't let me interrupt you.

In your mind's eye, where do you see the scissors?

- Just try one of the many boxes that are scattered about.

One of the many moving boxes. Thank you.

- Is the box,

like, small or medium?

Large? - Medium.

- Okay.

(tranquil music)

(Leonard exhales)

Wanna hear something funny? I actually found two pairs.

- Orla. - Anyway, keep going.

But I found, I literally, in 10 seconds, found two, so.

(Leonard breathing furiously)

(tranquil music)

(Leonard exhales)

(objects clattering)

- Oh my god.

(objects clattering)

Orla, what- what is this?

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

- I'm doing clear lights with the tree.

- As opposed to what.

- Color.

- I think in this apartment, though,

color's too much. - Orla!

I asked you for 10 minutes.

All I wanted to do was just meditate

and try to get myself back on track,

and now I am freaking out.

- Well, if you're meditating,

doesn't it seem like you would be more relaxed after?

- I don't know.

Freaking out. I'm freaking out.

I'm itchy. I'm breaking out in fucking hives.

Look at this apartment. How am I gonna afford it, though?

I was doing so good. I was thinking really positive.

What is anything? Do you know what I mean?

Like, what is anything?

What is oat milk? Why am I buying it?

You know what I mean? Do you know what I mean?

Like, I know,

like, we used to think milk was just milk, right?

And I know that oat milk is just milk made from oats.

- Right. - And I guess I'm buying it

'cause I think it makes me healthy or something, right?

But, like, how do I know?

Is it? Is it healthier?

Does it make me feel better?

How can I tell if it makes me feel better

if I can't tell how I'm feeling?

Because I'm just, like, up and down

and up and down and up and down.

How can you tell what anything is

if everything's always moving?

- Okay, I...

As it turns out, yes, I- I am a little high, but-

- What?

Why are you, I don't know, why are you help-

Why are you helping me? Why are you bothering?

Why are you here? - Okay, I'm helping-

- Don't you have your own life to do?

Sorry.

(pensive music)

See, I'm not...

Okay, you know what? I'm gonna go.

- You're gonna go see Savannah?

- No.

- You're gonna go see your healer

who's your own fucking age.

- So?

- [Orla] Why, why do you-

- She's good at what she does.

- You do this thing where you're like,

"Oh, I'm off on my vibration."

And I'm just like,

"I can't really figure out what's going on."

And, "Oh my god, I can't, where's-"

- I'm sorry. I'm leaving.

Have fun ruining my shit.

(tranquil music)

(knocking at door)

Oh my god!

- Sir, are you okay?

- What? - Are you okay?

- Yeah, I'm fine. - I just saw you as

lying here. - No, I'm just having

a little meditation. - It looked like you've had

some kind of an accident or an attack of some kind.

- What? - So sorry.

I just wanted to make sure you're okay.

- [Leonard] I'm fine. Thank you.

- I just know that sometimes that he can have a text.

Also, you know this street- - Okay, no, I'm fine.

Thank you so much. Goodbye!

- I took it last week. I'm just trying to help.

- Oh my god! What the fuck?

Ah!

(Leonard hyperventilating)

(upbeat music)

- Leonard? - Savannah.

- [Both] Hi!

- Oh my god, you look so hot.

- Oh my god, thank you. I did nothing. (chuckles)

- I know it's your day off.

- Mm.

- But I'm in a little bit of an emergency.

Can you just, can you just give me a quick treatment?

Just like that magic thing that you do where I lay down,

and you, like, take me through my subconscious,

and then I wake up and I feel amazing.

- Um, no, see, we're moving today.

We're moving, like, tons of stuff around.

- What do you mean moving stuff around?

- Um, financially, we're moving, uh, with the crypto.

- Cool. - Yeah, and then also,

we're moving this space, yeah, for my clothing line, so.

- Oh yeah. That's so great. - Yeah, yeah, super exciting.

So just do the affirmations,

and then we'll get you in, okay, next week.

- I kinda need it tonight.

There's, like, something kind of important that I'm doing.

- I really have to go, but I, I, um...

It's so nice to see you.

- Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

(upbeat music continues)

- Okay, I'm desperate. This is, like, an emergency.

I just, I went really off today.

- I know, it's just, I have boundaries,

and I had boundary issues,

so now I assert boundaries

so that I don't have issues with boundaries.

- Just, like, one hour.

- No. I'm so sorry, sweetie. - Just one hour.

- Yeah, it's part of the work. It's part of the work.

- I'll pay double.

Thank you for having me here.

Thank you for (breathes)

making the space for me today.

- Yeah, so I'm seeing (clears throat)

there's a literal dagger coming at you from the right.

- (sighs) I knew it.

- Yeah.

- You know, it's difficult, because I've,

I've just been doing so well.

Like, I've been meditating every day, and I feel like,

I really feel like I've been becoming into myself.

And I've manifested this, you know, new apartment,

and I've, um,

you know, I manifested this text that I got today,

and all of a sudden

I feel like I'm- - What was the text?

- Um, Christo-

- Mm-hmm?

- texted me

that he, um,

like, wants to catch up.

- Okay.

- And I just,

I, I couldn't help but just, like, make a plan.

And I'm not really sure if, like,

that was the right thing to do,

because, one, I don't know if I can

handle that interaction right now emotionally.

I feel like I should be able to,

but (sighs) now I just don't know what to do.

I don't wanna cancel, because that would be lame.

And I feel like I just need a, um, reset.

I just need to hit the reset button and get back to where...

I just need to go...

I just got a little out of my body.

- Yeah.

I mean, it sounds like you're doing a lot of driving.

- I am. I am doing...

Like, what do you...

How, like, how do you do it? Like, how do you drive it?

- Drive what?

- Your car of life.

- I don't drive.

I don't get in the left side of a car.

I'm always...

When you're- - Oh, that's nice. Yeah.

- Yeah, but I'm saying you can do that for yourself.

Like, spiritually, you don't need to be driving

all the time. - I can just ride.

- You can just ride.

When you're driving,

you're not thriving when you're driving.

- And, like, I know that, like, I'm not, like, I don't,

I don't want my thriving to be so fragile, you know?

- Right.

And it hasn't felt like it is, but it's just...

- Yeah, you cannot- - I just feel like I'm...

I've, I've...

See? You can hear it in my voice.

- I can hear it in your voice. Yeah, I can hear it.

When you're talking about the driving, literally-

- I can even feel like I'm, like up, like,

I'm, like, up here, I'm up here.

- Every time you say "driving," your voice goes up.

Have you noticed that? - Driving.

- It goes up. - What is it about...

This is like, this is, it's like-

- Say it, say it again. Say "driving."

- Driving. - It went up.

- Driving. - Try to try to say "driving"

without your voice going up.

- Driving.

- It's still going up to me.

So I'm just gonna have you lie down.

Put your hands on your heart.

Great. Close your eyes.

- Oh, I feel better already.

- [Savannah] Great.

Take a deep breath in,

(Leonard inhales)

and a long breath out.

(Leonard exhales)

And just say hi to little Leonard.

Okay.

Stay there.

And put yourself somewhere in nature.

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard inhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(Leonard inhales)

(Leonard exhales)

(gravel crunching)

(gravel crunching)

(footsteps tapping)

(mysterious music)

(mysterious music continues)

(mysterious music continues)

(mysterious music continues)

(waves crashing)

(suspenseful music)

(waves crashing)

(suspenseful music continues)

(waves crashing)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(waves crashing)

(suspenseful music continues)

(waves crashing)

♪ To you ♪

♪ Happy ♪

- Hmm.

(child coughing) That's good. (laughs)

That's good, all right.

♪ Oh no (indistinct) ♪

♪ For my heart ♪

(footsteps tapping)

(footsteps tapping)

(footsteps tapping)

(footsteps tapping)

(footsteps tapping)

(footsteps tapping)

- Leonard.

Leonard, you can take your time to get up,

but you have about two minutes before I have a delivery.

So just take your time, but quickly, get up.

I'll meet you out front, okay?

(Leonard exhales)

(birds twittering)

(Leonard chuckles)

(birds twittering)

(birds twittering)

(birds twittering)

(door latch clacks)

(door thuds)

(birds twittering)

(birds twittering)

(leaves rustling)

(bright music)

♪ Ah ♪

(bright music continues)

My new home!

Oh!

Look at this space!

Wow!

Look at my tree!

"Len, tidy space, happy life.

Good luck with it. Orla."

(Leonard chuckles)

Orla.

Oh my god. Orla.

♪ Orla ♪

♪ Thank you for the tree ♪

♪ I'm sorry about before, Orla ♪

♪ But believe me ♪

I'm doing so much better now. I figured it all out.

Oh, Orla!

You're gonna love it.

I'm thriving.

I'm not driving.

It feels

so good.

♪ It's the dawning of the age ♪

of Leonard.

(bright music continues)

(Leonard chuckles)

- Hey.

Oh my god. Are you famous?

- Basically. (chuckles)

- [Woman] I really love your work.

(Leonard chuckles)

(bright music continues)

- Hey, man. Nice shirt.

- Hey, thanks. - You're welcome.

- Take it easy. - You too.

(Leonard chuckles)

- Hey, Leonard, is that you?

- Hey, Dan.

From last night.

- [Dan] Yeah, yeah.

Looking good. - You too.

(Leonard chuckles)

- [Dan] Ciao.

(Leonard yawns)

(car honking)

(Leonard sighs)

Hey.

Hey, let go.

Let go of me.

(Leonard chuckles)

(Leonard sighs)

(Leonard sighs)

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Hmm ♪

(cellphone ringing)

Hmm.

It's Sharon.

- For the 18th time, no, that is a load-bearing wall.

You cannot tear that down.

Sorry, okay? We're expanding the offices.

It's a ton of construction. It's a fucking nightmare.

Hi, Leonard. How are you?

- Um...

I feel pretty good.

- You look great. You're glowing.

Whatever you're doing, I need it.

Bottle it, sell it to me. Thank you very much.

Guess what? I'm calling you for a very exciting reason.

- What? - Remember-

Better get ready. Do you remember that feature?

Like the Apatowy, kinda like David Spadey one?

- Of course.

- [Sharon] Yeah, you booked the part.

You got Tate, all right?

You got the part.

- What?

- [Sharon] Yes, you got the part?

- Wait, wait, wait, I thought they gave it to

that guy Curtis.

- No, no. They decided that guy was a total fucking weirdo.

They didn't want him. He did not have the right vibe.

So now they called me. They want you.

You've got, like, eight days on hold on set.

You've got, like, 10 pages of script, which is not a lot.

It's great part. I'm very proud of you.

Would you like the role?

- Uh, let me think about it. Okay.

- Congratulations. Go pop some champagne.

Go get a colonic on me-

- Sharon. - at my place on Melrose.

I'll call ahead, tell them you're coming.

- Sharon! - I am coming to the meeting!

I have to go. Bye. (tranquil music)

(phone beeps)

(Leonard laughs)

(tranquil music continues)

- This is the best day of my life.

(upbeat music)

(upbeat music continues)

- [Fiona] Now, I can tell you, okay?

The answers will come to you.

- [Christo] I'd love to catch up tonight.

♪ To you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

- Should I cancel?

I shouldn't cancel, because it's lame to cancel.

- Not if he shouldn't go.

- I'm feeling like maybe I should cancel.

Oh my god. I'm gonna cancel.

- Is everything this hard? Yeah, you're gonna cancel.

- This doesn't feel hard.

- Yeah, exactly.

- You know what? It feels right? (clears throat)

Uh..

Hey.

Something came up.

Sorry.

Let's do it another time, maybe.

(phone dings) Send.

(Leonard laughing)

Oh my god. It feels good, actually.

(man laughing)

(upbeat music)

Hell.

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(music ending)

(cicadas buzzing)

(Leonard sighs)

(Leonard sighs)

(cicadas buzzing)

Hey, Orla, my sweet sister.

Um...

So it turns out today is the best day of my life. (laughs)

So far.

Um, but

I...

Okay, here's the deal. I wanna run this by you.

I might go meet up with Christo right now.

He actually texted me earlier.

He was, like, desperate to hang out with me, I guess.

Catch up.

And I said no.

And now I'm thinking,

well,

why not?

'Cause I'm, like,

I'm, like, looking really good and I'm feeling really good.

Why not, right?

I'm not gonna like hook up with him or anything, obviously.

But you know, it's...

I don't know, am I about to go do a bad thing? I think not.

But I did just want to check in with...

No. I mean, look.

(sighs) Okay, I went a little manic there for a second,

but I'm telling you, the path

has never been more clear.

Um, anyway. (laughs)

Um...

Call me back if you think no,

or call me back if you think...

I don't know, just call me back.

All right, I'm on my way to Christo's.

I'm like a minute away from his house. (laughs)

(telephone dialing)

- [Christo] Hey.

- Hey.

(both chuckling)

Wow, you picked up.

- Yeah. - You know, just, no one,

no one calls anymore.

- [Christo] Yeah, that's...

I can't say I get a lot of calls.

Well, what's up?

- Um...

Well, so that thing that came up is over,

so I am available now if you still are

and you wanna get a drink.

- [Christo] Oh, um...

you know, I, I can't right now.

But it's not even, it's not even a big deal.

Like, it's-

- Oh, okay. That's okay.

- [Christo] Yeah, yeah, like, it's...

I just wanted to, um, like, tell you something, but it's,

it's like a little, it's a little thing.

- What?

- [Christo] Um...

(chuckles) Just, uh-

- Well, I mean, um, we could hang out tomorrow.

- [Christo] You know what?

You know what? It's- it's totally fine.

I can just tell you on the phone.

It's not a big deal, but, um-

- Okay, spit it out already. God, Christo.

- [Christo] I know.

Basically I just, I just wanted to tell you that, um,

Jake proposed to me.

So we are engaged. (chuckles)

- Oh! Wait, what?

- [Christo] Yeah. (laughs)

Uh, I'm engaged, so...

It's so weird to say. - You're engaged to Jake?

- [Christo] Yes, yes.

So he...

- Oh my god. Congratulations.

- Thank you. - Congratulations.

To you both. To you both.

- [Christo] Thanks. I will tell him.

But yeah, that's- that's...

I just wanted to tell you. - No, that's- that's- that's-

- [Christo] But-

- You felt like telling me, why?

- [Christo] Uh...

(chuckles) That's, uh, that's a good question.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...

It's kinda awkward now saying it out loud.

I just, I guess I just thought you should know, but also,

it's so not a big deal, you know?

- Um, well, thanks for telling me.

But, uh, that's a big deal for you, so that's great.

That's awesome, Christo.

Happy for you.

- [Christo] Thank you.

(Leonard laughs)

Um...

Hey, so we are actually, like,

about to walk into this event at the, um, at MOCA.

- Oh, right. Right now?

- [Christo] Um, yeah, yeah.

We just parked the car, so.

Look, maybe we just, like,

pick this up another time or something, if that's cool.

- Okay, yeah. I mean, we could, like, get a drink tomorrow.

- [Christo] Um...

Shoot, it's,

it's work.

Tomorrow's not good.

But I'll let you know.

I'll, like, shoot your text or something,

and we can set it up.

- Okay, cool.

That's good. - Okay, cool.

- It's good to talk- talk to you. (chuckles)

- [Christo] All right. Yeah.

- All right. - Um, okay, I'll...

Yeah, I'll talk to you later.

- Okay, bye.

- [Christo] Bye.

- Have fun at the, um...

The...

(crickets chirping)

(suspenseful music)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

(music stops)

(Christo laughs)

(pot clatters)

(door opens)

(door latch clacks)

(crickets chirping)

(suspenseful music)

(suspenseful music continues)

(suspenseful music continues)

- Leonard?

- Yes?

- Hi.

Was that you?

- Yeah, that was me creeping around like a little creep.

(chuckles) Sorry.

I, um, I had a really deep meditation today,

so I'm kinda like...

But, um, it's so good to see you. You look amazing.

Don't you, aren't you supposed to be

walking into some event?

- Why are you here?

- Um...

I

don't

know. (laughs)

- Were you just, like, waiting outside on the phone-

- You texted me. - when we talked?

So clearly- - Okay, this was a bad idea.

I just wanted to be nice.

- This is what you wanted, so you got it.

Yeah. (train horn blaring)

♪ Ah ♪

- Are you okay?

(Leonard laughs)

- I'm not gonna answer that question.

Why does everybody ask if you're okay

when what they really mean is, like,

"What's wrong with you, Leonard?"

So don't ask if I'm okay when I'm doing so good right now.

My life

is amazing.

The day I had, you would not believe.

And I just moved into this new place.

Also, do you know what tomorrow is?

- What's tomorrow?

- No, yeah. No, it's okay.

It's okay. You forgot.

- It's your birthday.

Look, I didn't mean to, like,

make you feel anything with that call.

I just...

You need to move on.

- Okay, you were the one that texted me,

so clearly you're the one that's still obsessed with me.

- Okay. All right.

- I was just joking

- Leonard, this-

- But I'm glad to see that you're doing so well.

And, you know, if I don't see you at the wedding, you know,

I'll just catch you at the divorce.

Okay, bye.

(suspenseful music)

(suspenseful music continues)

My god, it's so good to see you.

- [Savannah] I love my parents.

- I love my parents.

- [Savannah] I love my parents.

- I love my parents. Next!

(cellphone ringing)

Hey, Sharon. - Hey, Leonard.

Oh fuck, I gotta take this call. Hold on one second.

- Oh, yeah.

(Leonard sighs)

- [Sharon] Fucking spam call. Never mind.

Hi.

- More info about the job?

- [Sharon] Yep.

- Great.

- Uh- Do they want me-

Do they want me to do a nude scene?

Get a little raise, maybe?

- [Sharon] I mean, I would pay good money for that.

- A little butt cheek?

- [Sharon] Oh, two butt cheeks.

No, actually. Leonard, I am so sorry.

They've decided to go in a different direction with casting.

(Sharon clears throat)

- Oh, so I didn't get the job?

- [Sharon] No, you did not.

So.

- Okay. (chuckles) Bummer.

- [Sharon] I mean, it's these insufferable,

insufferable twats at the studio.

They said they were going with a different face,

like a totally different look, and they...

This is their fuck-up, not mine, obviously, you know.

- A totally different look? Uh-huh.

So is it somebody who looks, like, better or something?

- [Sharon] Just different.

- Just different. Okay.

Did they say who.

- [Sharon] His name is Brayden, Brandon.

I'm so sorry, Leonard, I have got to run. But you know what?

We're gonna come roaring back from this with a vengeance.

Okay? You hear me?

- I know it. Okay.

Okay, great, I'll just, um...

I'll just work on cleaning up my vibration,

and then we'll manifest it, okay, Shar?

- [Sharon] Can I get a Whispering Angel?

Yep. Talk to you soon.

- Thank you. - Bye.

(suspenseful music)

- Fuck!

Oh fuck.

Okay.

Okay.

I get it, yeah.

So they chose me and then they unchose me,

because they felt the vibe change,

'cause the vibe went up and the vibe went down.

And the vibe went up and the vibe went down.

Oh

my

god.

(cars honking)

Oh shit!

Sorry.

- [Savannah] I support myself.

- I support myself.

- [Savannah] I am my best friend.

- (laughs) I am my best friend.

- [Savannah] I trust myself.

- I trust myself.

- [Savannah] I love myself.

- I Love myself.

(car honking) What are you doing?

- [Savannah] Easy to love myself.

- It's a fucking piece of cake to love myself.

- [Savannah] It's easy to love yourself.

- "It's easy to love yourself."

Fuck off, Savannah!

Take all my fucking money.

"It's fun to be a scam artist."

- [Clerk] Hey, can I help you?

- Hi.

Thank you so much. - Thank you.

- Have a lovely night.

♪ Salty fries ♪

♪ Salty fries ♪

♪ (vocalizing) Salty ♪

(keys rattling)

(sighs) It's okay, it's okay, it's okay.

(starter chugging)

(starter chugging)

(starter chugging)

(laughs) No.

(starter whines)

Um, Orla.

Hello.

Question mark.

Oh, it's Christmas. Yay.

Um, remember when I was so low vibration earlier?

Uh, yeah, I think I went a little bit lower.

Or maybe a lot. (laughs)

Yeah, so.

Yeah, just goes to show, you know,

just when you think things can't get any worse, they can.

So call me back.

Hopefully we're on the...

Wait, where are you?

(cellphone dialing)

Oh my god.

Come on. Pick up, pick up, pick up.

- [Voicemail] Your call is been forwarded

to an automatic voice message system.

- It's Orla. - is not available.

- At the tone,

please record your message. - Please record your message.

- When you're finished recording, you may hang up,

or press 1 for more options.

(voicemail beeps) - Hey, Orla,

this really isn't funny.

Um, I'm starting to, um, worry here, so...

Okay, love you. Bye.

- [Voicemail] Not available.

- Are you giving me the silent treatment,

or are you dead in a ditch somewhere?

Would love to know. Bye.

I know I'm being dramatic, but I am a drama queen.

Capital Q Queen.

Orla, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Call me.

I'm a mess right now. Just call me back.

Pick up the fucking phone, bitch. Fuck!

Okay, I'm leaving too many voicemails. (laughs)

Orla? (voicemail beeps)

Where the fuck are you?

- [Voicemail] Your call has been forwarded

to an automatic voice message system.

(voicemail messages overlapping)

The mailbox is full and cannot accept

any messages at this time.

Goodbye.

(dog barking)

("Auld Lang Syne")

- What are you looking at, fucker?

(Leonard sighs)

(cellphone ringing)

Oh, thank God. - Hi.

I, um...

Oh my god, I was sleeping.

I fell asleep on the couch. - You fell asleep?

- [Orla] I was having this epic dream, actually.

It was, like, Mom...

Basically, everyone's soul was like a sheet

that was outside of their body,

and it would flap in the wind,

and if, like, people's souls were tangled,

Mom would, like, iron them or, like, help them untie...

Anyway.

- I'm really glad to hear that.

- Yeah. (yawns)

Sorry, I had a big yawn.

Um...

Uh, where are you?

- I'm in, like, Glendale.

I'm just walking around,

and it looks like fucking Christmas around here.

Well, there's a really pretty house.

- Can I come over?

- Yeah. Come to the new place.

Ring-a-ding-ding. (laughs)

Oh, one thing. You're gonna have to pick me up.

(Orla laughs)

(dramatic choral music) - Manipulative is exactly

the word for it.

But then, that's Christo.

- So over it.

But I just like, I just fell right into the trap.

Oh, anyway.

I think maybe I'm gonna do more yoga this year.

(TV blaring)

(dramatic choral music continues)

- You know what I was thinking?

Actually, okay, I was thinking, you know,

with you, like, moving into this apartment, it's been...

Okay, I was thinking about Diane Ladd

in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- Diane Lane.

- Yeah, Diane Lane.

How she's, like...

So,

Sandra Oh sends her on a gay tour of Italy.

- Gay?

- Yeah, because Sandra Oh's gay.

So she sends her on...

But Sandra Oh's pregnant,

so she's, like, can't travel or something.

So she sends her on the tour, and, like, Diane Ladd-

- Lane.

- Lane spontaneously buys this villa in Italy.

There's this, like, Italian guy

who's kinda showing her the ropes.

Like, an older guy who's kind of like

her way-shower in the town.

And then she had, after a little while of living there,

she has this whole breakdown, where she's like,

"Oh my god, what was I thinking buying this house?

I had this whole fantasy of a baby and friends and family

and cooking and a wedding and blah blah blah blah blah."

And she's just like, "I'm an idiot for doing this."

And then, a little bit after that,

she has another way-shower that, um...

She's, like, a blonde lady.

- Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.

- She, like, she's very dolce vita, and she-

- Yeah, she's got kind of a red lip, got a gelato,

and she's like (hums).

- Yeah, exactly. She was like, "Relax!"

And she's, like, in the...

She, like, goes in the fountain and stuff.

She has this whole monologue to her where she's like,

"When I was a girl, I used to..."

She's English. I don't know why.

She live in England, and then she moved to Italy.

They don't really explain that part.

But she's like, "When I was a girl,

I used to go searching for ladybugs,

and I would search and search, and I couldn't get any.

And then I would fall asleep, and I'd wake up,

and I'd be crawling with ladybugs."

And

then, because, like, she's trying to-

- She manifested them.

- Exactly, 'cause she's, like, fucking relaxed.

So then, cut to the end of the movie,

Sandra Oh has come over there for some reason,

and had her baby there,

and she's hosting a wedding

for her,

like these teenagers who found love that she's friends with.

And the old Italian guy comes back, and he's like,

"See? Your dreams came true.

A wedding, a baby, food, family, friends."

And then she's like, "Oh my god!"

And she realizes that it's true.

And just to, like, you know, really drive it home,

she's sitting there at the party,

like, people are all around her,

and she is just, like, in her chair,

basking in the Tuscan sun, and a ladybug is on her.

And then this hot American guy comes up, and he's like,

"Excuse me, are you blah blah blah?"

I can't remember her name.

And she's like- - Diane Lane.

- Yeah, but I can't remember her character's name.

She's like...

He's like, "You reviewed my book."

And she's like, "Oh no. Was it a bad review?"

And he's like, "Yeah, but it changed my life."

And there's, like, clearly sexual chemistry between them.

So then it ends, and we don't...

Like, when it ends,

we don't know exactly what's gonna happen,

but, like, clearly there's potential there,

and, like, they're gonna fuck.

- [Leonard] Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

- And then, like, basically, like, her life has actualized,

and it's beautiful, and it's not the,

it's not the fantasy she had in her head.

It just unfolded, and it was beautiful, and it's, like...

Anyway, my point is, you know, before I was like,

"The theme of the day is 'The Bourne Identity.'"

- Well...

- I think you are Diane Lane in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- Well, that I can work with.

- Right? Try saying it.

"I am Diane Lane in 'Under the Tuscan Sun.'"

- I am Diane Lane in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane in

"Under the Tuscan Sun." - I am Diane Lane

in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane

in "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- I am Diane Lane. I am under the Tuscan sun.

- Wow. - That feels good.

Let's watch that.

- Yeah, it's a good idea.

Oh my god, Leonard! - What?

- It's 12:01. It's your birthday.

(Leonard gasps)

Happy birthday.

- Thank you.

(digital assistant dings) "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- [Digital Assistant] Sorry, I don't understand.

- "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- [Assistant] Try saying, "What's on my shopping list?",

or, "Previous." - Oh my god.

"Under the Tuscan Sun" starring Diane Lane and Sandra Oh.

- [Assistant] I'm perfectly okay and happy to be here.

How about you? Are you okay?

- "Under the Tuscan Sun"

starring Diane Lane and Sandra Oh!

- Oh, there it is.

- [Assistant] Here's some information

about "Under the Tuscan Sun."

- No, it's 3.99.

- Just get it. I'll Venmo you.

- You don't have to do that.

- No, it's your birthday.

- And I lost it.

"Under the Tuscan Sun." (Orla laughing)

- Heres some information about

"Under the Tuscan Sun." - Oh, there. Oh my god.

Thank you.

(TV dinging)

- "Under the Tuscan Sun"- - What, this is...

No. - It'll come.

It's a preview. - No, no, no, that was...

- [Assistant] Here are the first three.

- "Under the Tuscan Sun." - Diane Lane, Raoul Bova,

Lindsay Duncan. (Orla laughing)

- Okay.

(TV dinging)

Thank you.

Oh, there she is.

- Wow, she's so young in this.

(TV blaring)

- This is exactly what I needed.

(tranquil music)

♪ Silent ♪

♪ Night ♪

♪ Holy ♪

♪ Night ♪

♪ All is ♪

(music stops)

(bright music)

- [Savannah] I am blessed with this life.

Today, I am my highest self.

I support myself.

I am my best friend.

I trust myself.

I love myself.

It's easy to love myself.

It's easy to love yourself.

It's fun to love yourself.

It's fun to love yourself.

It's fun to love myself.

(bright music continues)

(bright music continues)

(upbeat music continues)

(bright music continues)

(bright music continues)

(bright music continues)

(bright music continues)

(bright music continues)

(bright music continues)