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1
00:00:00,434 --> 00:00:03,103
[upbeat music]
2
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:21,321
[pensive music]
3
00:00:37,938 --> 00:00:39,339
[refrigerator closes]
4
00:00:47,833 --> 00:00:49,849
I'm not sorry.
5
00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:51,284
You hear me ask for an apology?
6
00:00:51,285 --> 00:00:52,852
No, but I feel like you
expect one.
7
00:00:52,853 --> 00:00:54,288
So, you�re mind reader now.
8
00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:58,558
I don't even get
what the big deal is.
9
00:00:58,559 --> 00:00:59,025
for like a century.
10
00:00:59,026 --> 00:00:59,999
We've been together
11
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:01,227
for like a century.
12
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,795
We're practically married.
13
00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:05,966
Novelette, I am not putting
your name on my bank account.
14
00:01:05,967 --> 00:01:07,633
You don�t trust me?
15
00:01:07,634 --> 00:01:08,401
That�s not it.
16
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:09,970
Then what is it?
17
00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:11,754
I don�t know.
18
00:01:11,755 --> 00:01:15,741
Do you feel like this
relationship is balanced?
19
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:18,911
Balanced? In terms of what?
20
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:23,083
In terms of the effort
each of us contributes?
21
00:01:23,084 --> 00:01:25,918
I mean Novelette,
I pay the rent,
22
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,721
I pay the bills,
23
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,720
I pay when we go out to dinner,
24
00:01:27,721 --> 00:01:28,754
to the movies, on vacation-
25
00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:30,724
I am on disability.
26
00:01:30,725 --> 00:01:33,092
The government gives me
like $10 a month.
27
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,160
Come on, they give you
more than that.
28
00:01:34,161 --> 00:01:35,328
What do you want me to
pay for? Toothpaste?
29
00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:36,379
All I'm saying is
30
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:39,265
sometimes I feel trapped
in this relationship.
31
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,500
I mean, what would you do
if you didn't have me?
32
00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:42,768
I�d survive.
33
00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:43,819
Oh, right. How?
34
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:46,458
Moving back in with your mother?
35
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:50,444
That is so fucking unfair.
36
00:01:50,445 --> 00:01:53,612
You�re completely dependent
on me, Novelette
37
00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:55,114
It's a lot of pressure, I mean
38
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:57,784
maybe sometimes I just
want somebody to depend on.
39
00:01:57,785 --> 00:02:01,087
Is this about me
not letting you watch me
40
00:02:01,088 --> 00:02:02,348
hook up with other girls?
41
00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,124
No, I said that as a joke.
42
00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,292
You weren't laughing
when you said it.
43
00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:07,343
I didn�t mean it.
44
00:02:07,344 --> 00:02:09,295
Okay, like you wouldn�t get the
popcorn ready if I said yes.
45
00:02:09,296 --> 00:02:10,629
And that's not the point.
46
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,698
I don't care that you're
bisexual. Novelette.
47
00:02:12,699 --> 00:02:15,702
All I want is a girlfriend
that has her shit together.
48
00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:22,609
What are you saying?
49
00:02:25,612 --> 00:02:27,314
I think we need to break up.
50
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:31,284
[solemn music]
51
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,585
[door knock]
52
00:03:06,586 --> 00:03:08,021
It's open.
53
00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,357
Hey.
54
00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:12,491
Brought your dish back.
55
00:03:12,492 --> 00:03:14,602
Thanks, you can just leave it
on the table.
56
00:03:14,661 --> 00:03:16,095
Where's loverboy?
57
00:03:16,096 --> 00:03:18,197
I don't know. We broke up.
58
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,200
Oh. I'm sorry. Why?
59
00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:24,204
He said something about me
being a complete mess.
60
00:03:24,604 --> 00:03:25,705
Oh.
61
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,339
Oh?
62
00:03:27,340 --> 00:03:28,941
I mean oh like, uh-
63
00:03:28,942 --> 00:03:30,009
like a surprise oh.
64
00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:32,045
Like, oh, where�d he
get that idea?
65
00:03:32,046 --> 00:03:35,781
Well, let's just hope your break
went better than my last one.
66
00:03:35,782 --> 00:03:39,552
My ex poured period
blood in my Brita jug.
67
00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:41,520
Ew. You�re lying.
68
00:03:41,521 --> 00:03:43,722
No, she left a DIVA cup
right where I could find it.
69
00:03:43,723 --> 00:03:45,357
That's disgusting.
70
00:03:45,358 --> 00:03:46,692
Oh, you think that's bad?
71
00:03:46,693 --> 00:03:48,360
I had another ex one time
72
00:03:48,361 --> 00:03:50,796
defecate in my favorite
pair of heels.
73
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:51,697
On purpose.
74
00:03:51,698 --> 00:03:53,566
How do you shit in heels
75
00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:54,867
by accident?
76
00:03:54,868 --> 00:03:56,802
Where are you meeting
these women?
77
00:03:56,803 --> 00:04:00,039
Oh, and I had another ex of mine
urinate-
78
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,407
Okay, you know what?
79
00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:03,142
You're done with the breakup
stories.
80
00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:04,578
Revolting. Thank you.
81
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,247
Here.
82
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:08,797
Try this.
83
00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:16,590
It needs more salt.
84
00:04:17,491 --> 00:04:19,092
You always say that.
85
00:04:19,093 --> 00:04:21,560
When was the last time you had
your blood pressure checked?
86
00:04:21,561 --> 00:04:22,428
Hey, I'm not the cook.
87
00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:23,479
You are.
88
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:29,401
So how are you feeling about it?
89
00:04:29,402 --> 00:04:30,452
About the breakup?
90
00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:34,106
Try not to think about it.
91
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:35,275
You moving out?
92
00:04:37,410 --> 00:04:38,778
I don't know.
93
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,779
I mean, I don't want to move
in with my mother,
94
00:04:40,780 --> 00:04:43,449
but I cannot afford this place
on my own.
95
00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:45,417
I mean, you could find something
cheaper.
96
00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:47,620
Cheaper than East Vancouver?
97
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:50,122
I'd have a better time
finding an ice cube in hell.
98
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:53,293
You know, I saw a studio
apartment going for 1400.
99
00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:56,096
Where do these landlords
get the nerve?
100
00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:57,764
Beats me.
101
00:04:58,298 --> 00:04:59,466
You uh-
102
00:04:59,467 --> 00:05:01,467
wouldn't happen
to be in the market for a
103
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:02,601
sugar baby, would you?
104
00:05:02,602 --> 00:05:04,592
Girl, I'm looking for my
own sugar mama.
105
00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:06,139
[laughing]
106
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:10,377
Yeah, I�ll just find a place
107
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:10,377
close to my job.
108
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,778
And what am I supposed to do
for rent?
109
00:05:12,779 --> 00:05:15,447
Anyone in Vancouver will snatch
up the second room in a second.
110
00:05:15,448 --> 00:05:16,650
If they don't?
111
00:05:18,451 --> 00:05:20,219
Novelette, I can�t solve
112
00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:21,555
all of your problems.
113
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:28,962
[upbeat music]
114
00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:32,232
[photos snapping]
115
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:39,005
[photos snapping]
116
00:05:48,481 --> 00:05:51,418
[typing]
117
00:06:01,695 --> 00:06:04,331
[phone vibrating]
118
00:06:05,665 --> 00:06:06,715
Hey, mum.
119
00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:09,703
Your aunt just called me
to tell me Lisa is pregnant.
120
00:06:09,704 --> 00:06:13,205
Doesn't this family have enough
people already?
121
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:14,256
No. It doesn't.
122
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:17,191
So you and Timothy need
to put that uterus to good use.
123
00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,779
Timothy and I broke up.
124
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:22,014
-Oh, no.
125
00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:23,717
I'm sorry.
126
00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:26,219
Do you want me to set up
your bedroom?
127
00:06:26,453 --> 00:06:27,786
No. I'm good.
128
00:06:27,787 --> 00:06:30,389
Honey, you can't afford the rent
on your disability
129
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,557
check alone.
130
00:06:31,558 --> 00:06:33,726
I know, that's why I'm
getting a roommate.
131
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:35,061
A roommate?
132
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:37,463
I just read an article
about a woman
133
00:06:37,464 --> 00:06:39,198
whose roommate chopped her up
and ate her.
134
00:06:39,199 --> 00:06:41,400
Yeah. I will be sure to vet
out all the cannibals.
135
00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:43,402
-Novelette-
-Mum, I�m almost 30
136
00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:44,723
I think I'm going to be fine.
137
00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:46,789
I got to go.
138
00:06:48,694 --> 00:06:50,743
[typing]
139
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,077
[rhythmic music]
140
00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:53,413
Have a seat.
141
00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:59,653
So, tell me about yourself.
142
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:03,922
This is what $900
143
00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:06,092
a month gets me in Vancouver?
144
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:09,662
I get my own bathroom,
145
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:10,713
right?
146
00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:13,166
Do you have a problem
with Boa constrictors?
147
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:16,269
Are you vegan?
148
00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:19,939
Because I feel very unsafe
around meat.
149
00:07:21,841 --> 00:07:24,611
Are you familiar
150
00:07:21,841 --> 00:07:24,610
with the Church of Scientology?
151
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:26,779
I can't share a bathroom
with you.
152
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:29,015
I don't even know
your bathroom habits.
153
00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:33,253
So you want $900 for this?
154
00:07:33,687 --> 00:07:35,621
I like your face.
155
00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,122
You're not an SP.
156
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,693
It's a really safe and low
157
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,693
maintenance pet to have around.
158
00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,928
Not including utilities.
159
00:07:42,929 --> 00:07:44,264
Can I look in the fridge?
160
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,365
I brought you some pamphlets.
161
00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:47,416
Okay.
162
00:07:47,767 --> 00:07:51,037
In fact, conversations about
meat make me very uncomfortable.
163
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:56,876
So I'll wait for your call.
164
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:58,712
Hello?
165
00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:00,213
Hello?
166
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,049
Hello?
167
00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:06,619
How come
my ad only attracted freaks?
168
00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:09,988
Come on, I like the sound of
that Boa constrictor guy.
169
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:13,625
Please, I'd be getting two
roommates instead of one.
170
00:08:13,626 --> 00:08:14,676
[laughs]
171
00:08:18,064 --> 00:08:19,898
You want to move in with me?
172
00:08:19,899 --> 00:08:21,567
Absolutely not.
I haven�t had a roommate
173
00:08:21,568 --> 00:08:24,003
since grad school,
and I'm not going back.
174
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:27,239
You know what? I think
I might actually know someone.
175
00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:28,807
She's black, she's queer.
176
00:08:28,808 --> 00:08:30,242
She's employed.
177
00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:33,178
And her lease is expiring soon.
Her landlord is not renewing.
178
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:34,229
How do you know her?
179
00:08:34,748 --> 00:08:36,582
She used to be my
personal trainer.
180
00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:37,684
Alright.
181
00:08:38,918 --> 00:08:40,519
Couldn't hurt to meet her.
182
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:41,570
Okay.
183
00:08:42,155 --> 00:08:44,256
[upbeat music]
184
00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:46,826
This would be your room.
185
00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:58,504
The ceiling's kind of low, but
186
00:08:58,505 --> 00:08:59,672
it'll work.
187
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:03,675
We only have one bathroom,
so it's a shared situation.
188
00:09:03,676 --> 00:09:04,610
Hope that's okay.
189
00:09:04,611 --> 00:09:06,012
That's not a problem.
190
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:07,613
What do you do for work?
191
00:09:07,614 --> 00:09:09,047
I do a lot of things.
192
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:12,050
Personal training,
brand ambassador.
193
00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:13,719
You know, bartending.
194
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,621
The bullshit town
we live in, right?
195
00:09:15,622 --> 00:09:16,555
VanCity?
196
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,891
You know one job ain't enough.
197
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,959
God, I was real happy when
Dom told me about this place-
198
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,061
Dom?
199
00:09:22,362 --> 00:09:24,129
Dominique.
200
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:26,032
Everyone calls her Dom.
201
00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,399
I don't.
202
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:29,134
Oh, yeah, all her friends do.
203
00:09:29,135 --> 00:09:32,037
Anyway, she told me
there was a black queer woman
204
00:09:32,038 --> 00:09:33,972
looking for a roommate.
It's in my price range.
205
00:09:33,973 --> 00:09:35,974
Oh, but utilities aren't
included, you know.
206
00:09:35,975 --> 00:09:38,544
I know.
It's still a pretty good price.
207
00:09:38,545 --> 00:09:39,812
I'm glad you think so.
208
00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:42,314
Most people
are completely delusional.
209
00:09:42,315 --> 00:09:43,917
Well, what do you do for work?
210
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:45,417
I don't work, I�m-
211
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:47,419
I'm on disability.
212
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:48,253
Seem fine to me.
213
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:49,489
What's wrong with you?
214
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,591
I-
215
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,993
I don't really feel comfortable
216
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,992
talking about-
217
00:09:53,993 --> 00:09:56,895
Okay, I know when to back off.
218
00:09:56,896 --> 00:09:58,831
So, the place is
available immediately.
219
00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:01,266
-Why is it available?
-Excuse me?
220
00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:04,270
Like, why is your last roommate
moving out?
221
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:06,939
I don't think that's relevant.
222
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:09,608
I mean, if they're moving out
because you're crazy?
223
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:11,611
I'd say
that it's pretty relevant.
224
00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:14,246
It wasn�t my roommate.
225
00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:16,115
It was my boyfriend. And he-
226
00:10:17,116 --> 00:10:18,284
We broke up.
227
00:10:18,285 --> 00:10:21,186
Sorry. What happened?
Why�d you guys break up?
228
00:10:21,187 --> 00:10:23,455
Are you interviewing to be
my roommate or my therapist?
229
00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:24,490
I'm just kidding.
230
00:10:24,491 --> 00:10:26,859
Hey, you can keep that part
to yourself.
231
00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:28,928
Listen, I like the place.
232
00:10:29,262 --> 00:10:30,797
I like you, okay?
233
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,299
When can I move in?
234
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:36,268
Like I said, the place
is available immediately.
235
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:38,203
But if you want to wait
till the first, that's fine too.
236
00:10:38,204 --> 00:10:41,641
Alright, Novelette.
You got yourself a roommate.
237
00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:47,480
[driving music]
238
00:10:47,530 --> 00:10:52,080
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