Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

(lively orchestral music)

(sentimental music)

♪ You cannot get something for nothing ♪

♪ And only a chump would try it ♪

♪ Whatever you see that you really want ♪

♪ You may have, provided you buy it ♪

♪ You'd like to live a life of luxury ♪

♪ Wearing ermine wraps, a bracelet perhaps ♪

♪ Or this sparkling gem ♪

♪ Remember they cannot belong to you ♪

♪ Until you pay for them ♪

♪ You cannot get something for nothing ♪

♪ You've got to lay it on the line ♪

♪ The cars we ride in ♪

♪ You have to pay for them ♪

♪ The wines we thrive on ♪

♪ You have to pay for them ♪

♪ The foods we live on ♪

♪ You have to buy ♪

♪ You must supply ♪

♪ The do-re-mi ♪

♪ You speak of things that money cannot buy ♪

♪ For instance, can you name a few? Just try ♪

♪ Beauty to attract the man you love ♪

♪ You have to buy ♪

♪ Gems of thought to cultivate the mind ♪

♪ You have to buy ♪

♪ Even vim and vigor and good health you have to buy ♪

♪ Sunny skies and Mother Nature's wealth you have to buy ♪

♪ Cheese and roses ♪

♪ Snowshoes and statues ♪

♪ Perfumes and pistols ♪

♪ Piccolos and dynamos ♪

♪ Garbage cans and feather fans ♪

♪ Candy sticks and building bricks ♪

♪ Silver chests and movie tests ♪

♪ Aeroplanes and streamlined trains ♪

♪ Let's see the color of your dough ♪

♪ You cannot rearrange a plan ♪

♪ Made by man since the world began ♪

♪ You cannot get something for nothing ♪

♪ Only a chump ♪

♪ Thinks he can ♪

- Put it back. - Put what back?

- Come on, give.

- I never did it before, honest.

- Why did you do it this time?

- It's satin.

I've never had a satin blouse.

Are you going to turn me in?

Please don't.

You don't now what it is to want something terribly.

To want it so much that you don't-

- Something the matter, Ms. Roberts?

- Yes, there is.

Look. There's a smudge on the front.

- Oh.

- You certainly have a right to complain.

If you'll come with me to the adjustment desk-

- Of course. Ms. Roberts will take care of you.

I hope you won't hold this against the Morris store.

- I'm sure we can straighten it out. Can't we?

- Oh, yes. - And thank you.

- Please.

- Gee, you're a swell guy.

- Yeah?

Now listen.

Just because I'm a pushover,

don't get the idea the next one will be.

Beat it, and the next time you want a satin blouse,

well, you can pay for it.

- Yes, ma'am.

Thanks.

- Don't thank me, thank Mr. Morris.

He hates having scenes in his store.

- All the little kiddies

like this here Goosey Gander Rocker.

It's cute, ain't it?

- Well, I think it's goofy-looking.

- But, uh, most little kiddies

like the Goosey Gander Rocker.

Look, honey. Look.

- Well, I don't like it, and you're a shiftless skunk.

- Now, uh, listen, sweetheart.

All the little kiddies like the Goosey Gander Rocker.

And you're gonna like the Goosey Gander Rocker

or I'm gonna wrap the Goosey Gander Rocker

around your fat little neck, ya get me?

- Yes, sir.

- Okay, lady. She'll take it.

- Oh, pardon me. - Yes.

- Darling, are you sure you like it?

- Oh yes, Mother, I just love it.

- You have the real child psychology.

That's what I like about Morris'.

Its salesmen are so specialized.

- Are you the man who sold me this thing?

- Yes, ma'am. - You told me it opened cans.

- Lady, that ain't the half of it.

This little thing is one of the wonders of the ages.

It's a screwdriver, bottle opener, cheese slicer,

icepick, and vegetable parer.

If it had one more little gadget, I'll bet it could cook.

- But it doesn't open cans.

- Oh, yes it does. Now you watch me.

Now, first you do like this.

That's to make the touch a little more sensitive.

Then you grab it like this,

and you turn it to the right,

then to the left, and you listen-

- You act more like you're opening a safe than a can.

- Now, ain't that funny how them habits hang on?

- Jerome, I've never seen anything so brazen in my life.

The man practically admitted he was a safe robber.

- Well, he is. Or was, I should say.

Now who but an ex-safecracker

could handle one of those newfangled kitchen gadgets?

- But Jer- - Say, that gives me an idea.

George. - Yes, sir?

- Make a note to put a safe in one of the front windows

and have Patsy Mason open it

with one of those new can openers.

- Jerome, don't you realize that I, your wife,

come in contact with these people? (chuckles)

You know, sometimes I think you've gone a little off.

Peopling, actually peopling a decent store with convicts.

- Ex-convicts, my dear.

Who've been recommended here through probation officers.

And the store isn't peopled with them.

There are 50 working here perhaps.

50 out of 2,500.

- What's the difference?

If the public ever finds it out,

your business won't be worth a nickel.

- How are they gonna find it out?

No one knows them.

Very few of them even know each other.

You see...

You see, Mary, that's the idea.

They're not set apart.

They're not stared at like sideshow freaks,

just because they've made one or two mistakes

that any of us might make.

- Jerome!

Have you something in your past

that you never told me?

- No.

I'm sorry, Mary. Nothing that romantic.

- Then why? - Look, Mary.

Most people think if they pay a few dollars

to community chests and goodwill agencies and so on,

they've done their duty,

and they can shrug aside all responsibility.

But you've got to do more than that.

- Don't be ridiculous.

What you can you do more than giving money?

- In my case, jobs. - Oh.

- You see, Mary,

no matter how good a person's record has been in prison,

they can't get out on parole

unless they have a job to come to.

Now, if somebody doesn't give those poor guys

a chance to go straight,

how are they gonna stop being criminals?

- Oh, nonsense.

They were born that way

and there's no use trying to change them.

- Do you know, Mary,

that since I've started this experiment,

I haven't had one case of backsliding?

- Oh, Jerome, I don't know why

you have to be such a problem.

Mrs. Marvin's husband just collects stamps, but not you.

Oh, no. You must have thieves and jailbirds for a hobby.

- And one is 14.

And five is 20. Thank you.

- Carter. - Yeah?

- There's a customer asking for you.

- Oh, uh...

Can't somebody else take him?

- The gentleman asked for you, Mr. Carter.

Says you know his feet.

- Okay.

What can I show you, sir?

- Something in a buck.

- Okay, sir.

White, tan, or gray, sir?

Did you have to come here?

- What's Joe...

White, with rubber soles.

What's Joe gonna do?

- Why don't you ask him?

Ow!

- [Customer] I'm asking you.

- Ow! (grunts)

Cut it out, will ya?

- Is white buck smart this season?

- Oh, very smart, sir.

Okay, what do you wanna know?

- Is Joe going away? - That's what I hear.

- What's he got on his mind?

- It ain't you, I can tell you that.

What don't you leave him alone?

- I can't stand it, Gimpy.

My conscience won't let me just stand around

and see a guy with Joe's talents rot on a job.

- You ain't got any conscience.

- Yeah, it kills me every time I look at you,

Gimp Carter, second-story man, turning into a stool jockey.

- Well, I gotta make...

- Tie up my shoe. I ain't gonna buy nothin'.

And tell Joe I wanna see him before he leaves.

And I don't mean maybe.

- Listen, I'm telling you,

this is a good racket and I oughta know.

There isn't a racket I haven't tried.

Look at that grip.

- Mm, let me try it.

- Uh, we have an instructor here,

if you want to learn any new grips.

I'm just the salesman here.

- Okay.

I'm sold.

- Thanks.

- Oh, and I want some tennis shoes.

What do you think I need?

- Uh, I wouldn't know anything about that.

All shoes are on the first floor.

I'll show you while they're wrapping the racket.

Step this way, please.

- Okay.

Do you play?

- Tennis, you mean? - Yes.

You look like you'd be pretty good.

- How are you?

- Well, I never had any complaints. (giggles)

- Who have you played with?

- Ooh, a lot of good players.

You wouldn't know them.

I'd like to play with you sometime.

- What? Oh, I'm sorry, but I'm leaving town tonight.

- Oh.

- This gentleman will take care of you,

and you'll find your racket at the wrapping counter.

- Thank you. Goodbye, and good luck.

- Thank you.

- Psst! Hey, Joe.

- Hello, Gimpy.

- I just seen Mickey.

I don't think he likes you going away.

- So what?

- Well, I'd be careful, Joe. He's a hard guy.

- (chuckles) That worries me.

- Well, he wants to see you before you leave.

Hey, why don't you go to Old Man Morris

about Mickey and them guys?

He knows you're trying to stay on the level.

He'd make 'em lay off.

- Since when have I been a squealer?

- Okay, Joe, okay. Don't get sore.

Sure you don't want me to go with you

to the bus station or anything?

- Thanks. Uh, I got something to attend to before I go.

- I fixed up a couple of letters for you to take along.

- Thanks.

- Well, they may help.

I hate to see you leave, Joe.

It isn't because anyone's found out about you, is it?

- No, sir.

Everybody's been swell.

- And California's a long way off.

I take it then that your reason is something personal.

- Yes, sir.

That's it. It's something personal.

Mr. Morris, look.

I wanna thank you, see?

When anyone asks me now where I worked last,

I don't have to turn around and walk out.

- You're supposed to be a very dangerous character.

They told me that a man with your record

would never go straight.

I'm glad that you've proved 'em wrong.

Keep it up, kid.

I know it hasn't been easy.

Goodbye, Joe. Remember, you can always come back.

- Hello, Joe. - Hello, Mickey.

- You got a minute? - Nope.

- Now listen, Joe, I got a proposition

that oughta interest a smart guy like you.

- I'm leaving town tonight.

- I figured you wouldn't stick

to no 8 o'clock job much longer.

What are you gonna do?

- Get another 8 o'clock job.

- Then why the trip?

- They tell me the climate'll do me good.

Everything grows big out there.

- Yeah?

Well, don't get too big for your old friends, Joe.

We might not like it.

- That'd be too bad.

Hello.

- Hello.

- Been waiting long?

- Seems like days.

Where's your grip?

- Oh, I checked it at the bus station.

- I've been looking at that again.

Gee, just imagine, some girls would go in there

and buy it and think nothing of it.

- Just smellum, isn't it?

- But Joe, it's Hour of Ecstasy.

- Is it?

- Joe. You just don't understand, I guess.

There isn't anything in the world that can build a girl up

like good perfume.

It does something for her soul, kind of. See?

- No.

- Must be very simple to be a man.

- Would you like to be one?

- No!

Um...

Yes, I don't know.

Sometimes I think it would be easier to be a man.

But then, women are so much...

You don't think very much of women, do you?

- I never did.

Before.

I'll never forget the time you stayed up all night

telling me not to get discouraged,

after you found out I'd been in jail.

- I didn't find out, you told me.

- I never told anybody else.

- Why did you tell me?

I would've never believed that a feller and a girl

could be friends like us.

- It is unusual.

- Where are we heading?

- [Helen] I don't know, I thought you knew.

- What do you say we go and dance around once?

- I'd love to. - Let's go.

(bright orchestral music)

It may sound funny, but I get a kick

outta going into a place like this.

There was a time that I couldn't.

Against parole rules. No drinking.

Even couldn't go where they serve it,

or they put you right back in storage.

Well, here we are.

(sentimental orchestral music)

(song ends) (crowd applauds)

- They're pretty good.

- Very good.

How 'bout a drink?

- I'd love it. Lime and lots of ice.

- Oh, pardon me. Beg your pardon.

- Bread and butter!

- Look, how 'bout a real drink? Just this once.

- I'd better not, Joe.

- Aw, come on. I'm gonna have one.

I'm gonna need one pretty bad

when I have to say goodbye to you.

Come on.

- All right, I guess I'll need one too.

- Swell. Here.

You sit down here and I'll be right back.

(lively jazz music)

- Hello.

Do you like dancing?

- No, thanks.

- One little dance won't hurt you.

- I'm sorry, I'm with someone.

- Well, if you're sorry, why don't you get rid of him, huh?

Honey, you're only kiddin'.

You ain't with nobody.

- Please. - Come on, get up outta there.

- Relax, sonny, relax.

- You heard what I said. Get up.

- Joe!

Joe!

Joe, don't!

Joe, please don't do anything!

- Come on, break it up, get back there.

Where do you think you are?

We're all ladies and gentlemen here.

- There wasn't gonna be no fight anyway.

He was just four-flushing for the dame.

He was ticked to death when you got here, wasn't ya?

- Joe, come on. Come on. - Come on, break it up, boys.

Keep on dancing. - Come on.

(lips smack) (onlookers laughing)

Don't look back.

You shouldn't fight.

- No, I...

I guess I shouldn't.

Not me.

I wonder if they transfer those records to California.

- You're not gonna start worrying about that again?

You're starting new.

- Maybe.

- Joe, years from now, you'll hardly remember all this.

You'll see.

You'll meet some girl and fall in love and settle down,

just like everyone else.

You're no different.

- I am different.

- You'll have to forget that.

You have no record.

You've never been in jail.

That's why you're going away.

- I wouldn't get married like that.

- No, I guess you wouldn't.

I guess you're going to tell her.

- And that'll end it.

- No. Not if she loves you enough.

(dramatic orchestral fanfare)

(crowd applauding)

(wistful music)

- I'd like to sing you a song

about the sort of man we girls all dream about.

If he ever comes along, he may mean happiness or misery,

but it's heaven just the same.

♪ They call him good for nothing ♪

♪ He isn't much to see ♪

♪ But I've a funny feeling ♪

♪ He's the right guy for me ♪

♪ In a waterfront dive ♪

♪ Full of wretches and vagabonds ♪

♪ Planning their ill-gotten gains ♪

♪ There came a mysterious stranger ♪

♪ With the salt of the sea in his veins ♪

♪ Though he seemed to be going downhill ♪

♪ In a world of forgotten men ♪

♪ Still he gave me the queerest sort of thrill ♪

♪ That decided me there and then ♪

♪ To say doggone you, snap out of it ♪

♪ This is love ♪

♪ There wasn't a doubt of it ♪

♪ They call him good for nothing ♪

♪ He isn't much to see ♪

♪ But I am sure that he is ♪

♪ The right guy for me ♪

♪ There will come a day ♪

♪ When he'll sail away ♪

♪ Without even saying goodbye ♪

♪ Though I'll swear at him ♪

♪ And I'll flare at him ♪

♪ I'll be his till the day I die ♪

♪ And as I stand bewildered ♪

♪ Watching the lonely sea ♪

♪ I'll always say that he was ♪

♪ The right guy for me ♪

(crowd applauds)

- Do you think a girl would mind that?

If she knew I changed?

- You'll find someone.

We gotta go and get you a good seat.

I hear it isn't so good to sit over the wheels.

- All right.

Come on.

(lively music)

- I'm going to fix my face. - All right.

- Ignore him. Don't pay any attention to him.

- I won't, don't worry.

- I won't be a minute.

(lips smack)

- But you're always sitting down.

Come and get it.

- Don't look at him. He's dying to start trouble.

Just keep ignoring him. - Come on.

- You did the right thing. - Sure! Come on.

He must've fainted. Come on.

Let's get outta here.

- Stand clear, please. Stand clear.

- Well, goodbye.

- Goodbye.

(brakes squeal)

Joe!

- Baby.

- Joe, were...

Were you trying to ask me to marry you tonight?

- What?

- Because...

If you want me to, I will!

- Hey, driver!

Stop it, will ya? Stop it!

(tires screech)

Swell trip, wasn't it?

- [Driver] This is a fine start!

- Have you changed your mind yet?

- Nope.

- Listen, I don't wanna talk you out of anything,

but maybe you'd better wait till tomorrow

to think it over or something.

- Nope, my mind's made up.

- Okay.

But I wanna be fair.

I'll give you 20 minutes.

- You're not trying to back out?

- Helen.

That's why I was going away.

I couldn't be around you anymore.

And I couldn't ask you.

- I know, Joe.

- You'll never be sorry, Helen.

- Aren't you even gonna kiss me?

- Let's get married tonight, huh?

- Right now?

- Sure!

- Can we this late?

- Gosh, I don't know.

The Information Bureau. They know everything.

- Yeah.

You can ask them anything. - Uh-huh.

- I knew a boy once who-

- You don't have to tell me about him now, do you?

- But Joe, it was just a boy.

- I know it!

Oh, uh, I'm sorry. I...

I was just thinking I didn't know anything

about you before, and...

- And what, Joe?

- Well, I...

I get crazy when I think there was another guy, maybe,

or something, or, well...

Let's skip it, huh?

- You can skip it, Joe.

Never been anybody.

- I know it. See?

That's the crazy thing about me.

I know it all the time.

- How do we get to this Information Bureau?

- The subway.

This is gonna be a life sentence, kid.

- You bet.

- No time off, even for good behavior.

- You can't get rid of me, Joe.

- Get rid of you?

I wonder if you know what you mean to me.

A whole new life.

With you, I can do as you're saying.

Forget that I was in prison.

- You're not getting such a bargain, Joe.

- You?

Do you know what kinda girls an ex-con usually meets?

Jailbirds and dames like that.

Well, if a guy is gonna hang around with 'em,

he might as well stay in jail.

I know what you're gonna say.

I feel sorry for 'em too,

but I just don't wanna be around 'em.

Maybe I'm too suspicious.

That's what prison did to me.

I could never trust 'em.

- Joe, I...

I love you more than anything in the world.

Keep remembering that.

- I know I can trust you.

You'll never lie to me.

You'll never let me down.

Come on, let's go.

(bright music)

(Joe and Helen laughing)

Oh!

How many more flights are there?

- Shh! You'll wake up the landlady.

- Well, why doesn't she keep the lights on?

- She thinks I'm home already.

I don't stay out so late.

I always get married in the afternoon.

- Ouch!

- [Helen] Joe, are you hurt?

- [Joe] I'm dead!

Whoo! - Shh!

Shh! She'll hear you.

- The Statue of Liberty.

(both laugh)

- She lives down the hall. - Oh.

Nice place you got here.

- Yeah. Here we are.

Here.

(Joe kicks wall) Shh!

- All right.

- Joe.

Don't laugh, but it's good luck

to be carried over the threshold.

- Okay.

Don't catch on fire. - No!

- [Joe] There goes my last match.

- [Helen] Move a little to the left. There's a lamp there.

I think there's a lamp.

(Helen screams) (furniture crashes)

(loud thump)

I found the lamp.

Statue of Liberty!

How do you like it?

- Softest floor I ever fell on.

- [Woman] Get up from that.

Get up and get out of my house.

- Out!

- But Mrs. Levine-

- Don't "Mrs. Levine" me.

Out. - Out!

- And that no-good-for-nothing bummer.

- But Mrs. Levine, we're married.

We were married tonight. - Sure.

- Aw, shush.

I don't believe you.

If you were married, you would have told me, Helen.

- I didn't know it myself until tonight.

Look.

- Oh, how wonderful.

Look, Abie.

See? - Mm!

- Joe, this is Mr. and Mrs. Levine.

Joe Dennis, my husband.

- How do you do?

- Pleased to meet you. - How are you?

Zol zein mit glick.

That means it should be with luck.

- Thanks.

- You're a fine boy,

but you are getting the best little girl in the world.

- I know it.

- Mama. - Huh?

- They're both going to live here, eh?

- Of course, where else?

(pounding)

- That's Mr. Kelly. We must be disturbing him.

- Oh, so we are disturbing him, huh?

(angry pounding)

I'll fix him.

(knocking loudly)

You go to sleep! You will stop making noise!

Ha!

Six weeks' rent he owes me,

and should complain from our noise, yeah?

Kinder, tonight you can make all the noise you want.

Come on, Abie. Oh.

- Mama. - Huh?

- Maybe I bring up a bottle of wine,

maybe show the young people a good time.

- Mm.

With a bottle of wine you're gonna show

the young people a good time.

(speaking Yiddish)

Go, go. Go bring the luggage, go.

You know, darling, I wasn't going to throw you out.

Just him.

Goodnight, kinder.

- [Helen] Goodnight.

- Goodnight. - Come on, come on.

- Goodnight. - Goodnight.

(speaking Yiddish)

- I think they like you.

- I think they like you too.

- Let's clean up the place, huh?

- Yeah. Gosh, what a mess you made!

- Mess I made? - Yes, you made it.

- I never make a mess.

- Well, you did this time.

- Oh no, I didn't. - Oh yes, you did.

- Okay, okay, I did, I did.

Here's your hat. - Thank you.

- What's that? - Bathroom.

- Oh.

- And that?

- Closet.

- Closet.

I don't know, but, uh, isn't there something missing?

- Missing?

- Yeah, you know, a...

- Behind you.

- Ahem.

- Ahem.

- Ahem.

- Um...

Well, I...

I guess you'd better unpack your things.

- All right.

- Um...

You can have one of the top drawers

and half of the middle drawer.

- Fine. - That's all you get.

I'll help you.

- Okay.

(laughs) What a mess.

Took me a long time to fill it.

I'm gonna frame this sometime, 10 years from now.

Welp.

- Joe, uh...

Uh, I'll empty the drawer.

You empty your grip.

- Okay.

- Uh, Joe?

L-I just happen to think that we'd better not say anything

at the store about us being married.

- Why not?

- Well, uh, they don't want their employees

to get married to each other.

It's a rule.

- Yeah?

I didn't know that.

Funny.

It don't sound like Morris.

Well, we know we're married, don't we?

- Hello, Helen.

- Hello.

- Still living at the same address?

- Ye-yes, Mrs. Levine's.

It's an awful nice place.

- Well, I hope it is.

I'll drop in some evening. See you...

Wednesday.

Goodbye.

(time clock chimes)

- Gee, it's tough trying to eat a turkey sandwich

and get a henna rinse both in on your lunch hour.

- Hiya, Nellie. - Hello.

- Hello, Gladys.

- Her name ain't Gladys.

- No? - No.

- Daisy, isn't it?

- Oh, I remember. Elsie.

- Helen!

- Oh, I don't know how I forgot it.

Excuse me. - It's all right.

- What are you doing tonight, Nellie? Anything?

- Not with you. I gotta study.

Uh, why don't you have a date with Helen?

- I don't believe I can. I have a date.

- You wouldn't even break it for me?

- Don't be smart. You ain't the only pebble on the beach.

Oh, uh, I forgot about my henna rinse.

- What'd she mean by that crack?

- Nothing, she's just trying to build me up.

Jealous already?

- Not if you give me a date, Gladys.

- Mm-mmm.

- Not even to go on a honeymoon?

- Where are you gonna get the money for a honeymoon?

- I cashed in my ticket to California.

- (laughing) You're crazy.

- Go ahead, kid. Pick your honeymoon.

Come on.

- Okay.

(bright, lively music)

Potato salad, cucumber salad, pigs' knuckles, tongue,

turkey, deviled eggs, Swedish meatballs, celery.

What have you got, Joe? - Uh...

- Oh, creamed fish, salmon, smoked herring,

shrimps, anchov...

Say, you don't like fish, do you?

- No, but fish are crazy about me.

They follow me around like dogs.

- The regular dinner?

- No, we're not having the dinner.

We just came in for a few appetizers.

- We're having dinner in Italy.

- Baby, you don't cut, you wind!

- Wind? - Look.

Just like this.

See how simple it is? You wind it up.

Then you go like this. - Hey!

One of those herrings you had in Sweden just winked at me.

- If he does it again, you punch him in the nose,

butting in on our honeymoon like this.

- It isn't that I can't do it, I'm just too weak.

Whoo!

- Eating with chopsticks is such hard work,

I always whip up a fresh appetite.

See what your fortune is.

Well, what's it say?

- "Ten stalwart sons will bless thine old age."

- Ten?

- "Manufactured by the Hong Kong Noodle Company."

- Come on.

Let's get outta here.

(Helen and Joe laughing)

- What's that?

- A pancake, fraulein.

- A pancake? - Ja.

- I'll fix it. - Yes, sir.

- Yeah, and then it'll fix us.

- Watch.

First you squeeze the lemon, see?

Then you spread the applesauce.

- Eating your cake, Joe?

(pensive music)

Go ahead, Joe.

I like to see you have a good time.

- You know what you can do, don't you?

- Excuse me.

- I'll be seeing you down at the store one of these days.

- Who was that?

- Aw, just a couple of guys.

- Really? I'd never have guessed it.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- No, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to be nosy.

But you seem worried.

And Joe, if you're worried,

I've got a right to worry with you.

We're married, darling.

- Don't you think I know that?

- Let's go. A fine honeymoon, eating all the time.

(Joe laughs)

(Joe and Helen laughing)

- Good evening, darlings.

- Hello, hello. - Oh, Mrs. Levine.

We had such fun!

- That's good, kinder. Have a good time.

Oy, when I was younger, I could tell you...

- Mama!

- That's all right, that's all right.

And have I got a surprise for you.

Haven't we, Abie, huh? - Mm!

- I've got a separate room for your husband all ready.

- Already? Why, we were only married yesterday.

- It's all right, it's all right.

It's almost free for only $4.

- But...

But we just-

- You know, I kicked that no-good-for-nothing Mr. Kelly.

He always hollered for quiet, so I gave him quiet,

with nature in the Central Park.

- Gee, a suite!

I never had two rooms to live in in my life.

- Okay.

Sold.

And we'll use it as a sitting room.

- Okay! And now, kinder, come and see the surprise.

Go ahead, go ahead. Look, look!

You like fish, don't you?

- Oh, sure, sure.

- Yeah, Joe's crazy about fish.

They like him too. They follow him around like dogs.

- Come on, it's our special.

Mama didn't make gefilte fish in a long time.

Let's sit down and eat! (speaking Yiddish)

- They don't need no company.

Goodnight, kinder. And have a good appetite.

- Goodnight. - Come, Abie.

- Goodnight. - Goodnight.

- Oh, I forgot to tell Mrs. Levine something.

And get rid of the whale before I come back.

- Ooh.

- Mrs. Levine! - Yeah?

- Just a minute.

Uh, will you do me a favor?

- What is it, darling?

- Well, um, you see,

the Morris store doesn't want their girls to marry,

and I heard today that they check up on their employees.

So if anyone comes around asking questions,

you won't give me away?

- Leave it to me. Will I call you an old maid.

- And Mr. Levine, you'll warn him?

- Listen, who does all the work around here?

When the spotter comes around spotting,

Abie will keep his mouth shut.

I am the liar in this family.

- Thanks.

- Good morning, Mr. Morris. - Hello, Joe.

- Good morning, Mr. Morris. - Good morning.

- Good morning, Mr. Morris!

- Hello, McTavish. How's the wife?

- Oh, she's fine now, Mr. Morris.

I sure appreciate you transferring her to the lacies.

Those heavy bolts in the dress goods

were a wee bit too much for her.

- Well, I'm glad to hear she's feeling better.

- Thanks, Mr. Morris.

- I didn't know your wife worked here.

- Sure, we were five years together in the glassware.

- I thought he didn't like his employees

married to each other.

- Don't be silly.

He gave us a $100 icebox for a wedding present.

Someone's been kidding you.

- Yeah, I guess they have.

- Well, Helen, you're on the home stretch.

- Yes, sir.

- The job all right? - Yes, sir.

- Mm, I wish there were more Morrises.

But you've got a good record, Helen. Keep it up.

Now remember, no drinking. - Yes, sir.

- No staying out at night. - Yes, sir.

- And no falling in love. That is, not yet.

- No, sir. - Okay.

Now, I've got good news for you.

I think we can drop the weekly reports from now on.

I'll see you...

A month from today, okay?

- Thank you, Mr. Dayton.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye.

- Why don't you drop around Thanksgiving Day?

We might talk a little business.

- My business is selling sporting goods.

- You?

Don't be a sap.

Listen, Joe. I want you to come in with me.

- Sure you do.

I always had the brass and all you had was a quick getaway.

- You gotta remember that for the rest of your life?

There was reasons for that.

Listen, I got a pretty sweet setup.

You'd like to make a little dough, wouldn't you?

- That mashie 14.70.

- Too much for me.

I'll be waiting for you on Thanksgiving Day.

- I can't keep you from waiting.

Almost ready?

- Almost!

Gee, didn't we have fun last night?

I could even stampede out there to be with the Levines.

You know why I like to be with them so much?

- Why?

- It's the only time I get called Mrs. Dennis.

We don't have to pretend around them.

Oh, Joe, I'd like to climb to the top of a roof

and holler at everyone who goes by,

"Hey, I'm Mrs. Dennis!"

- Why can't you?

- Why, Joe, I told you.

- Helen, are you sure you were right

about Morris not liking it?

- Why, of course.

Joe, would you get me a bath towel, please?

They're in the closet, darling.

Can't you find them?

- Yeah, I found 'em.

- What's the matter, darling?

- I found a bundle of letters in with the towels.

- Letters? Well...

- [Joe] What are they?

- I-I really don't remember what they are.

I, uh...

- They look like love letters.

Can I open them?

- No. Uh, I'd rather look at them first.

I really don't remember what they are.

- Okay.

None of my business anyway, I guess.

Here's the towel.

Breakfast is on the table.

- Aren't you gonna eat with me?

- No, I got kind of a headache.

I'm gonna go out and walk it off.

- But it's raining.

- It isn't bad.

A guy wanted to see me today anyway.

(whistle tweets)

(traffic honks)

(knock at door)

- Joe!

- Hey, you!

Will you stop dripping all over my floor?

What are you doing down there anyway?

- I'm looking for Helen Roberts.

She lives here, doesn't she?

- [Mrs. Levine] Sure, she lives here.

- [Dayton] Do you know if she's home?

- [Mrs. Levine] If you want to see her,

why don't you wait downstairs in the parlor?

Say, what kind of a place do you think I run here?

- [Dayton] Very nice, evidently.

But I still want to see Ms. Roberts.

- Just take your time. Take your time.

Who shall I say wants her?

- Dayton, Mr. Dayton.

- Maybe. You better wait outside.

Helen, oh- - It's all right, Mrs. Levine.

I know Mr. Dayton. He can come in.

- Thank you.

- May I? - Thanks.

- He's from the store.

- It's okay.

But I don't like unmarried girls having visitors upstairs.

- I'm awfully sorry, Mr. Dayton.

Mrs. Levine is very strict.

Won't you sit down?

- Well, you seem to be pretty well protected here.

Is everything going all right?

- Yes, sir.

- What about Joe Dennis?

- What?

- Do you know him?

- Yes.

- Well, I'm glad you're telling me the truth.

We've had a report about you and Joe Dennis.

- You have?

- Yeah, you ride to work

in the subway with him every morning.

- Oh.

He rooms here too, you know.

L-I-I know him that way.

- Well, bad company can get you back into prison,

you know, Helen.

It's a violation of your parole.

And Joe Dennis is bad company.

He's an ex-convict.

- Joe Dennis?

- Yes.

Well, you both work at Morris'

and I know it's natural to go to work with him.

That's why you should be warned.

- Uh, I'll try not to see him.

But will you warn him about me too?

If you do, he might mention it to someone,

and then all the people at the store-

- Well, we don't hound people.

There's no reason to warn Joe Dennis about you.

You never pulled a job with a gun in your hand.

Don't worry, Helen.

I've got to go.

You're a good kid and I'm all for you.

- Thanks, Mr. Dayton.

- Keep your chin up.

You know, in three months more you'll be rid of me.

Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

Joe!

- What's the matter?

- I...

I didn't even hear you come back.

Let me take your coat. You'll catch cold.

An old friend of mine was here just now.

We talked a lot about you.

He'd seen us together on the subway.

He just left. Didn't you hear us?

- [Joe] No.

Who was it?

- Um, where's your hat, Joe?

Oh.

Phew!

- You didn't answer my question.

- Oh! Oh, the man!

Um, I knew him at the store. Poor guy.

Oh, your coat's dripping all over everything.

His wife got sick once, and right on top of that,

he was fired, so I loaned him $5.

I went without lunches and felt very bighearted and noble.

I guess I'd better put this in the bathroom.

I certainly never expected to see that five again,

but sure enough, up he pops today and pays it to me.

- Why did Mrs. Levine tell me

that guy was a spotter from the store?

- Why, I don't know.

- If he was just a friend, why did you close the door?

- Oh, the door.

You pick on everything!

Doors are either opened or closed!

How do I know why I closed the door?

Oh, Joe.

What's happened to you? Something's changed you.

What is it, darling?

What have I done to make you suspicious

of every little thing I do?

Please answer me.

- Well, it's...

I happen to find out...

Helen, McTavish and his wife both work at the store.

And you told me-

- Oh, Joe.

Is that what's bothering you?

Listen, Mrs. McTavish is Mr. Morris' wife's relative.

- She is?

- Sure.

Morris has to make an exception there, doesn't he?

Darling, don't you see how silly you were?

- I just get crazy ideas.

I'm so crazy about you, Helen, that I...

- Darling, we're crazy about each other.

It isn't you and it isn't me.

It's you and me.

(bright music) (girls laughing)

- I'm giving a little get-together

for the boys tonight, Gimpy.

Turkey and all the fixings.

I'd like to have you drop in.

- Thanks, Mick, but I...

I can't, I- - And bring Joe.

- Oh, Joe wouldn't come even if I asked him to, I know.

- When you come down tonight, you bring Joe, see?

- Oh, Mickey.

- You wouldn't want me not to like you anymore,

now would you, Gimp?

I ain't never said a word

about that little job up in Detroit.

- Mickey, be quiet, will ya?

- That's because I like you, see?

But if I should get to not liking you...

- All right, what?

- When you come down tonight, you bring Joe, see?

There's gonna be lots of nice presents.

- [Man] With Mr. Morris' best wishes.

- [Woman] Thank you. Merry Christmas.

- [Man] Thank you, same to you. Merry Christmas.

With Mr. Morris' best wishes.

- Hey, Joe, how 'bout a Tom and Jerry?

- I oughta go home.

I mean, I got a date.

- Aw, girls don't like you to show up too early

on Christmas Eve.

They got things to do.

You know, wrap up packages and things.

Stuff you're not supposed to know they got you.

Listen, Joe, you've been awful hard to find lately

and, well, I get sorta lonesome on Christmas Eve.

- (chuckles) Okay, Gimpy.

But just for a minute then.

("Silent Night")

(chair creaking)

(nut cracks)

- Funny.

Last Christmas I was on the inside looking out,

and thinking I'd go bats if I couldn't get outside.

And now I'm out...

I don't know.

Come to think of it, it was kinda cozy in that little cell.

- My old lady used to send me cake.

The screws wouldn't let me have it.

Figured there was a saw hid in it.

If they'd only known. (laughs)

I coulda sawed my out with her cake.

Boy, what a cook.

- Remember the chicken we used to get Christmas?

- Once a year.

And you started thinking about it around the 4th of July.

- It's funny.

You can eat chicken now whenever you want,

but you don't get such a kick out of it.

- And no old lady to tell you off.

Why do guys get married anyhow?

- Some chump ate an apple once and the rest of us guys

been getting cramps from it ever since, regular.

(gang laughs)

- Gee, for five years she couldn't even talk to me.

Them were the days, all right.

- Was a nice buncha boys up there.

- Most of us are still together at that.

- And that's the way it oughta be!

We gotta stick together!

If you try to buck it alone- - That's right!

Do you remember the new guy that came up that night?

That was Christmas Eve too!

- Yeah, remember? - Yeah.

- The first time we seen him was in the mess hall.

- And nobody knew who he was.

- But we got it over the grapevine,

a big shot was coming up.

- And the screws wouldn't answer no questions.

- And then, after lights out-

- Yeah.

Remember how it started?

(knocking on table)

(knocking on table)

- Can you hear me?

(cards tapping)

- Can you hear me?

(spoon tapping)

- Is the coast clear?

(pipe tapping)

- The coast is clear.

- [Convicts] The coast is clear.

(glass clinks)

- You, the new guy.

Who are you, pal?

- [Convicts] Who are you, pal?

(metallic clang)

- It's number one!

- Number one? - Number one?

- Number one!

- The big shot!

- They finally caught up with him.

- He took the rap.

(ashtray clangs)

How long you in for?

- [Convicts] How long you in for?

(metallic clangs echoing)

- Five years.

- Five years.

- Five years ain't so long.

- Five years ain't so long.

Five years ain't so long.

- [Convicts] Five years ain't so long.

- [Big Shot] That's a lifetime!

Five years away from everything!

- [Convicts] Ain't so long.

- [Big Shot]Lights, and music, and beautiful dames!

Cooped up in here like a rat!

- Five years ain't so long. - I'll go nuts!

I gotta get out of it!

- [Convicts] Five years ain't so long.

- [Big Shot] I got plenty of jack socked away,

and a mouthpiece!

I tell you, I tell you, I gotta get out!

- [Convicts] Stick with the mob, stick with the mob.

- [Big Shot] I gotta get out!

- [Convicts] Stick with the mob,

do you hear us?

Stick with the mob,

do you hear us?

- Stick with the mob, do you hear us?

Stick with the mob, and the mob will stick with you!

Yes, the mob will stick with you!

Yes, the mob will stick with you!

Do you hear us?

Yeah, stick with the mob, stick with the mob!

Do you hear us?

Yeah, stick with the mob, stick with the mob!

Do you hear us?

Yeah, stick with the mob, stick with the mob!

And the mob will stick with you!

And the mob will stick with you!

And the mob will stick with you!

(pounding loudly) (voices hush)

(Joe knocks rhythmically)

- [Joe] Can you hear me?

- [Gang] Sure, we hear you.

(Joe knocks rhythmically)

- [Joe] Is the coast clear?

(gang pounds table)

- [Gang] The coast is clear.

- [Gangster] Give us the high sign!

(Joe knocks rhythmically)

- One scotch and a chaser for Joe.

- Okay.

(gang chatting excitedly) (lively piano music)

(rhythmic knocking)

- [Waiter] And the same all around for the boys.

- The king is here! - Let him in!

I told you he'd be here!

(gang chattering and laughing)

- Hiya, gang.

- [Gang] Hiya, Joe!

- [Gangster] Hiya, Joe!

- [Gang] Hiya, Joe.

- [Gangster] Hiya, Joe.

- Being around with all you guys-

- [Gang] Hiya, Joe.

- Seeing the same old faces-

- [Gang] Hiya, Joe.

- Takes me back to the old days.

- [Gang] Hiya, Joe. Stick with the mob.

- And I feel like I'm part of the mob again.

- [Gang] Stick with the mob, stick with the mob.

- Though I've gone straight and gotten a job-

- [Gang] Do you hear us? Stick with the mob.

- Still I seem to belong with the mob again.

- [Gang] One you're in there's no escape

unless you let 'em hang you in crepe.

Think of the big house once again,

how you were our buddy then.

- You're part of the mob!

- [Mickey] You belong to the mob.

(footsteps running)

- Something screwy's going on.

- What's going on?

- What's it mean?

- What's all the racket about?

- What's going on?

- What's all the screws running for?

- Number one is up to something!

- He must be stir-crazy!

- What's the guy trying to do?

- What's he up to? Is he on the I am?

- Yeah, he's taking a powder.

- What's he taking a powder for?

- Five years ain't so long.

- He's trying to run out on us.

- He ain't got a Chinaman's chance!

- That guy must be nuts! They'll chop him down!

- He won't get to first base!

- He can't make it!

(metallic clanging) (sirens wailing)

- Listen!

- He's done it! - He's out!

- There's a car waiting.

- There he goes!

- Hey, buddy! - Hey, buddy! Hey, chief!

- [Convicts] Do you hear us? Stick with the mob!

Do you hear us? Stick with the mob!

Do you hear us? Stick with the mob!

(machine gun fire roaring)

- They got him.

He didn't make it.

- It don't work, trying to go it alone.

Even the big shot found that out.

- Yeah.

- And you can't beat it either, Joe.

Once you're in, you're in.

That's why we're getting together again.

- Go on, Mickey, tell him what it is.

- Yeah, go on and tell him.

- Joe, this is big.

- You gotta come in, Joe.

- We're knocking over the store.

- Morris'? - Yeah, sure!

- There's a fortune just laying there,

waiting for us to glom onto it.

- That's right. - Furs, silver, silks!

- Twenty, thirty thousand, just laying there!

- And us chumps working for nickels!

- What kinda heels are you guys, doing this to Morris?

- Eh, what did Morris ever do for us?

- He gave you a break. Nobody else ever did!

- [Gangster] Yeah, he gets rich off of us.

- Sure, and he gave us $10 for Christmas.

(gang laughs)

- Come on, Joe, get wise. The boys want you in.

- Sure Joe. - Aw, come on, Joe.

- Yeah, come on, Joe.

- They'd follow you over a cliff.

- I don't wanna go over a cliff.

That's just what I been telling ya.

- I guess he's afraid his girl wouldn't like it.

- Helen wouldn't like it.

- That little plaster saint.

(gang laughs)

- Meaning what?

- What are you trying to put over?

Are you and Helen putting on a swell sister act?

Or is she taking you for a nice, juicy ride?

- It's all right with us if she's trying to keep her parole.

She'd be dumb not to, but why build her up to us?

- Parole?

- Didn't she tell you?

- I know a babe that roomed in the same cell with her.

- [Gangster] You mean you didn't know it?

- She's been making a sap out of you all this time?

(glass crashes)

(glass crashes) (piano strings chiming)

- I didn't say nothin', Joe.

- I knew it.

I knew it all the time.

I knew something was wrong.

But why did you have to tell me?

I was happy enough, wasn't I?

- Come back when you've cooled off, kid.

We'll be waiting for you.

- Mm-mm-mm, is this a cake.

It melts right out of your mouth.

- Gee, but some of the eggs and sugar

and butter and chocolate et cetera...

I don't know- - It's all right, darling.

It's going to be mine and Abe's Christmas present

to you and Joe.

- Thanks, Mrs. Levine.

- You know, you don't look

like you feel so good, my angel.

- I'm all right.

- Did you tell him already?

- Tonight.

- Ooh! What happiness that will be for him.

It gives me the goosefleshes!

Well, I'll go and get you everything for the cake.

But remember, the main thing in the cake is the beating.

You gotta be beating it and beating it and beating it...

- Hello, darling.

- [Joe] Hello.

- I can't leave this stuff to kiss you. It'll go flat.

Tired? - Not very.

Where's the paper?

- On the chair.

I'll be through in a minute, honey.

This is gonna be swell.

I hope.

Mrs. Levine's great-great-something invented it.

- Yeah? How many years ago was that?

- Oh, hundreds, I guess.

Let's see.

Mrs. Levine is...

How old do you suppose she is?

- Oh, I don't know.

How old do you think?

- Oh, she told me once when I first came here, but-

- How long you been here, kid? I never asked.

- Oh, about six months, I guess.

I remember she told me then-

- How long were you in for before that?

- Three years.

(door slams)

(crowd chattering merrily)

(door opens) (crowd hushes)

- Hello, Joe.

Come on in.

- By paying me the advance fee,

my services are at your disposal from now on,

in case anything slips.

But let's make this clear.

Our arrangements don't call

for the protection of anyone but yourself.

- Sure, that's understood.

It's what you said, $1,000.

You'll find it's all there.

- Naturally. If I don't, I'm not your lawyer.

And remember, if it turns out that you don't get into a jam,

the money is not refunded.

- Sure.

Well, so long. I'll be seeing ya.

(laughs) I mean, I hope not.

- So long.

(phone rings)

- Yeah?

What's the matter, Borton?

Who?

Mickey Bane?

- Boys all lined up, Joe?

- All lined up.

You got a mouthpiece to take care of 'em

in case they stub their toe?

- Oh, sure. Everything's all set for Wednesday night.

- Wait.

- The way you got it lined up, it's a pushover.

We can walk in standing up.

- You do it the way I tell you, we'll come out the same way.

- Come on.

You stick here, I don't want no visitors for a while.

- [Henchman] Okay.

- Course, I ain't saying you're wrong, Joe.

I'm just saying you got me all mixed up.

- I thought it was plain enough.

- Oh, sure, I'm straight about that.

I meet you at the back of the store at 12.

I didn't mean that.

- What do you mean?

- Well, I know I ain't very bright, Joe.

That's why I gotta believe what a guy like you tells me.

Well, you get me believing one thing

and then say all the time it ain't been true...

Well, I mean, two weeks ago,

Mr. Morris was the swellest guy in the world.

- Shut up, will ya?

- And now it's all right to cross him up.

- Shut up! For Pete's sake, lay off me, will ya?

- Okay, Joe, okay.

- I'll see you tomorrow.

- I'm telling you to lay off.

- Yeah?

Who says so?

- The big shot says so.

- The big shot?

But...

But couldn't we make a deal?

Maybe we could work together. Maybe-

- The big shot wouldn't dicker with you.

- Why not? I'm willing to play ball.

What's he got against me?

- He just don't like you.

(door shuts)

- Joe.

Joe, even if you won't talk to me anymore,

I gotta talk to you.

It's awful, you know,

living in the same house as somebody you love

and not talking to them or anything.

I don't blame you for being mad at me.

I thought I was doing the right thing not telling you.

But I guess I wasn't.

I'll do anything to make it up to you!

(Helen sobs)

- Helen! The telephone wants you.

- Okay.

Who is it?

- [Mrs. Levine] He's a friend of Joe's, he says.

- Hello. - Hello.

Is this Helen Roberts?

- What do you want? Who is this?

- [Caller]Aw, it doesn't make no difference who this is.

You don't know me.

I'm a friend of Joe's, and I'm tipping you off.

Tonight, you gotta talk Joe

into taking you to a show or something.

And then keep hold of him, see?

- What do you mean? - Dames can do that easy.

- What are you talking about?

- [Caller] I'm talking about Joe.

- Who is this?

- [Caller] Never mind who this is.

Listen, if you don't do like I tell you,

Joe's gonna get in trouble.

And it certainly shouldn't be did to Mr. Morris.

- Mr. Morris?

- [Caller] I mean, you keep Joe with you tonight,

because then-

- Because then he won't be there

when the job's being pulled.

Is that it? - Yeah. No!

Hey!

Hey, you! Are you still there?

Listen.

- Gimpy.

- [Gimpy] Don't tell Joe I called you up.

Hey!

Hey, you!

Are you...

- Mr. Morris, I'm...

I'm Roberts, in the blouses.

- I know. Sit down, Ms. Roberts.

- Thank you.

I suppose you're very busy. I shouldn't have...

But if I hadn't come quick, before I thought it over,

I wouldn't have had the nerve.

- Go on.

- Mr. Morris, when your life has a bad spot in it,

and it's spoiling everything it touches,

and it's liable even to take your life away from you,

don't you think it's better to just cut it out clean,

no matter how much it might hurt?

- I do.

- So do I.

That's why I came here.

- Hello.

- Oh.

You came anyway.

- What do you mean, I came anyway?

- Nothin'. Nothin' at all.

I just wondered.

- If you wanna back out, just say so.

- No, Joe, I don't wanna back out. I-

- All right, then pipe down and come on.

(bell tolling ominously)

- Monaghan reporting.

Everything quiet.

(Joe whistles)

(suspenseful music)

(Gimpy whistles)

(Joe whistles)

(tense music)

(suspenseful music)

(dramatic musical sting)

- It's a frame. - We've been turned in.

- Joe's girl's done it. - Your girl framed us, Joe.

- A squealer.

- Shut up.

- Just a dirty little stool pigeon.

- I said shut up.

Take the guns away from 'em.

- (laughs) Stop! I'm ticklish!

- Where's your gun?

- It's a hairloom.

- This man has no gun.

- So your brain clicked for a minute, did it?

If you aren't a pretty sight.

My wife wanted me to collect stamps.

I don't know why my hobby had to be idiots.

If you had a grain of sense,

you know I'd find out about this without this young lady.

If you can bribe a man for $50,

don't you think I can make him talk for 55?

For the love of Pete, Gimpy, put your hands down.

You make me nervous.

- Thank you, Mr. Morris.

- And to think that the law says

that eight useless guys like you

have to be put in a nice, comfortable prison

and fed at the taxpayers' expense.

Well, you're not gonna get off that easy.

My taxes are high enough already.

You're gonna work for your living, the same as I do.

That's why I listened to Helen

when she begged me not to toss you back into the can.

- Some princess anyway. - I've done all that I know

how for you, and it evidently hasn't done any good.

So she's talked me into letting her try.

She seems to think she can knock some sense into your heads.

But I doubt it.

But maybe you won't resent her

and discount everything she says, the way you do me.

Just because I happen to be your employer.

Will you need the guards?

Are you sure?

Now you listen to me.

I'm going.

But if any one of you leaves this room

before Ms. Roberts says he can,

he'll be sent to prison for breaking in here tonight.

Now, I know who you all are,

and I want to see every one of you

back on the job tomorrow morning at 8 o'clock.

And that doesn't mean three minutes after.

Come on, boys.

Oh.

And when you leave, please turn out the lights.

- Do you think that guy's on the level?

- [Patsy] I don't know.

- [Gangster] I still don't like the idea

of being here at 8 o'clock in the morning.

- This job didn't pan out so well,

but maybe the next one will.

- Sit down.

- Say, what does she want?

- Didn't you hear me?

I said sit down.

- Say, Joe, what are you- - Hey, Cuffy.

- [Gangster] Aw, never mind. Come on.

Well, we might as well make ourselves comfortable

while the cops clear out downstairs.

- Now you listen.

What I have to tell you isn't hard to explain.

You should've learned it at school.

The school we all went to.

Only I learned something at that school.

Everyone didn't, I guess.

It's something you've heard all your life

and laughed yourself sick at.

You've heard it from long-winded reformers.

You've read it in hot-air editorials.

It's the oldest chestnut in the language.

It's that...

Well, crime doesn't pay.

(gang laughs)

I don't mean because you get caught by the law and punished,

because sometimes you're not.

I don't mean because it kills

something decent inside of you,

'cause a lot of you wouldn't care about that.

What I mean is it doesn't add up in dollars and cents.

You can't make any real money stealing.

- Yeah?

We'd have made 30 grand outta this here

if you hadn't butted in.

- You can cut that down to 15% of 30 grand.

That's all a fence would've given you, and not a cent more.

- Shifty was gonna give us 25%.

- Shifty would've given you 15%, and that's all.

I used to know bigger people than you

that did business with him.

That's all he ever gave them.

Maybe I can show you better.

Let me prove it to you in black and white.

You figured the haul at 30,000.

Okay.

Haul, 30,000.

15%...

That's what the fence would've given you.

15% of 30,000 is 4,500.

Put that over here.

Now, the payoff over here.

The getaway car, how much?

- One grand.

- Okay.

Getaway car, 1,000.

You can sell it for half that, so you're out 500 there.

You could've stolen it, but the brain in back of the job

didn't want a hot car on his hands.

- Sure!

We always stole it before.

- Yeah!

Imagine, buying a getaway car.

- The trucks, to haul away the hot stuff.

You can't hide trucks for less than 200 apiece,

for the chances they take.

How many?

- How many?

- I don't know, Joe handled it.

- Joe? - Yeah, Joe.

- Okay, I guess you'd need two.

(Gimpy coughs)

Three then.

We were tipped off you bribed the watchmen.

Mr. Morris had a little talk with them.

He told them the only way to save their jobs

was by going through with it, like nothing had happened.

Three watchmen

at 100 apiece makes $300.

The two stockroom men you bribed

in the fur and silver department squawked.

- Why, the...

And me trusting him like a mother.

- They wouldn't risk their good jobs for $50 apiece.

That makes another 100.

The getaway tickets, we'll lump them together.

One, two, three, four...

Eight of you.

- Joe wasn't going.

- Eight of you, at 40 apiece I suppose.

Call it 300.

I'll throw in the tools,

and the money for the doctor, and your guns,

all the other little expenses, I won't even count 'em.

Oh, wait. There's the mouthpiece.

Can't get a lawyer for less than a grand.

They always charge that.

Now let's see.

2,800.

28 from 45 is...

$1,700.

And now for the boss.

You think you're gypped by Mr. Morris.

That your wages aren't high enough

for the hours you spend working for him.

So you make up your mind

you won't work for this boss anymore,

but there's always a boss on any job.

You simply traded Mr. Morris for another boss.

But this one doesn't pay your wages in advance

and get his profit afterward.

This one takes his profit first,

and you get what's left to divvy up among you.

His cut is a third, right?

- Yeah.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- Yeah, that's right.

- Okay.

Third of 1,700, is five, six, six, six.

$566.66, that's the boss' share.

Subtracted from 1,700 is four, three,

three, three, one, one.

$1,133.34, to be split between eight of you.

- Ten! There's two more guys with the boss.

- Okay, that makes it easier for me.

$113.33 for each of you.

And for $113.33,

you throw away your jobs, lose your homes,

be hunted by coppers, and sooner or later be sent to prison.

Some of you are two-time losers.

If you get sent up again, you're in for keeps.

Only the biggest sap in the world

thinks crime pays any dividends.

- But sister, now you ain't trying to tell us

that the big shots don't make any more than that?

- The big shots aren't little crooks like you.

They're politicians.

- What's keeping them guys?

(tires screech)

Get outta here!

- Get in.

I told you the big shot didn't like you, didn't I?

Get in!

- Sister, you're all right!

- Sure she's all right!

Hey, Joe!

Gee, Joe, now I know why you wanted to go straight.

Why didn't you tell us like Helen just did?

That's talk we can understand.

- He didn't know.

I tried to tell you, Joe, but you wouldn't listen.

- You mean you tried to tell him what you just told us

and he wouldn't listen?

- [Gimpy] Joe ain't so easy to talk to.

- Say, if I had a girl like that, I'd have some sense.

- Where do you get girls like that, Joe?

- I got mine outta jail.

- Joe.

- They raise 'em smart there.

Smart enough to kid a guy like me into marrying her.

- Joe.

- I wasn't any bargain either, I told you that.

But I told you.

I didn't marry you lying to you and cheating you.

You should be pretty proud of yourself.

Just skip it that I ever married you.

- Now, sister, hold on. - Just forget about it.

- Let me go. - Now listen.

- Don't pay any attention that.

- He didn't mean it, honest. - Let me go.

- Gee, Joe, that was no way to talk to her.

- You oughta thank her instead of kicking her teeth in.

- You made her feel pretty bad, Joe.

Did you see her face?

- A fella's got a perfect right to bawl his girl out,

but gee, not in front of people.

- Shut up, will ya? Shut up!

- Aw, I know how you feel, Joe.

No guy likes to admit his girl's that bright.

- Shut up! Shut up and get outta here, all of you!

Go on, get going! - All right, come on.

- No, wait a minute, listen- - No, never mind, guys.

Let him alone now, let him alone. Come on.

- Okay, Joe.

Okay.

Mr. Morris told us to.

- Where are you going?

- I'm going away.

- And Joe doesn't know a thing about it, I can tell.

Well, I'm not going to let you do it.

You have no right to take Joe's baby away from him.

- Joe doesn't know about the baby, Mrs. Levine.

- He doesn't know about- - No.

I'm glad he doesn't.

He won't worry about me like he might.

- Well, what are you going to do?

- I can take care of a baby by myself.

Other women have.

- I can take that Joe of yours

and spank him right over my lap.

- This isn't his fault, Mrs. Levine. It's mine.

You don't understand Joe.

I lied to him. He can't stand that.

He found out.

(Mrs. Levine sobs)

(suspenseful music)

(sentimental music)

(suspenseful music)

(dramatic music)

(register chimes)

- Helen.

Helen.

- Well, she was here this morning waiting when I came in.

She had no one else to turn to.

- But where is she now?

- She doesn't want anyone to know where she is.

- But she's my wife, Mr. Dayton. We're married.

- Your marriage was never legal.

As you know, a paroled convict has no civil rights.

Any contract he signs is null and void.

You got out of the marriage she cheated you into.

You're a free man.

- But I don't wanna be free, don't you understand?

I want my wife.

If you just tell me where she is-

- Sorry, she doesn't want to see you.

And we think it's best too that she doesn't.

- You didn't send her back, did you?

Just because she married me, I mean.

- No, we didn't send her back.

We don't want her baby to be born in prison.

- Did...

Did you say her baby?

- That's what I said.

- See the papers? - No.

Joe?

- Uh-uh, Mickey.

- Mickey?

- Gee, that could easy happen to us, you know.

Hello, Joe.

- Glad to see you.

I mean- - I know what you mean.

Listen, you guys.

I want you to go in with me on something I-

- You got a lotta nerve.

- I'm through, Joe.

- Didn't you see that?

- Yeah, but you got me wrong. I wanna...

I thought maybe you'd help me find Helen.

She's gone.

- Helen? - Gone?

- I told you you oughtn't kick her around the way you did.

- Aw, shut up, will you?

I did it and there isn't anything I can do about that.

What I've gotta do is find her and tell her.

- Well, don't worry Joe. If she's in town, we'll find her.

- Why, sure, Joe, this might've happened to us

if she hadn't kept us in the store.

- She kinda belongs to us too, Joe.

- Say, we're gonna turn this town upside down!

- We'll turn cop, as much as it hurts.

- We'll find her, Joe! - Yeah, we'll find her.

- Sure! - We'll take our days off.

(suspenseful music)

- I gotta find her.

I gotta find her.

(door opens)

- Well, where you been?

- Yeah, you been a big help.

- Well, while you guys been doing legwork,

I been doing brainwork.

- Yeah? With what?

- Well, I got to thinkin'.

If I was a girl and I was gonna have a baby,

where would I be?

- In a sideshow.

- I'd be in a hospital, that's where I'd be.

- [Gangster] But we have looked there.

- But I looked at the right time.

- Gimpy, you mean...

You didn't find her, did you?

(Gimpy chuckles)

(cart rattling)

- Mr. Dennis?

Which one is Mr. Dennis?

It's all over.

(gang sighs)

And your wife wants to see you. Follow me.

- Hello.

- Hello.

- I brought you this.

- Joe.

He's in the nursery.

- He?

Huh?

- Joe, I've been thinking.

Now, with...

Don't you think we ought to get married?

- [Justice] I now pronounce you man and wife.

- Here they come.

Come on. Come on, fellas, get ready.

- Congratulations! - Congratulations, Joe!

(gang chattering excitedly)

- Where's Gimpy?

- Yeah, where is Gimpy?

- Well, he's got a right to know what's going on, ain't he?

(baby crying)

(dramatic music)

(bright orchestral music)