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1
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[♪]
2
00:00:15,681 --> 00:00:18,049
♪ love and marriage ♪
3
00:00:18,050 --> 00:00:20,518
♪ love and marriage ♪
4
00:00:20,519 --> 00:00:22,320
♪ go together like ♪
5
00:00:22,321 --> 00:00:24,789
♪ a horse and carriage ♪
6
00:00:24,790 --> 00:00:28,793
♪ this I tell ya, brother ♪
7
00:00:28,794 --> 00:00:30,729
♪ you can't have one ♪
8
00:00:30,730 --> 00:00:33,632
♪ without the other ♪
9
00:00:33,633 --> 00:00:35,934
♪ love and marriage ♪
10
00:00:35,935 --> 00:00:38,536
♪ love and marriage ♪
11
00:00:38,537 --> 00:00:39,938
♪ it's an institute ♪
12
00:00:39,939 --> 00:00:42,340
♪ you can't disparage ♪
13
00:00:42,341 --> 00:00:46,111
♪ ask the local gentry ♪
14
00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:50,649
♪ and they will say
it's elementary ♪
15
00:00:50,650 --> 00:00:55,453
♪ try, try, try
to separate them ♪
16
00:00:55,454 --> 00:00:59,157
♪ it's an illusion ♪
17
00:00:59,158 --> 00:01:04,295
♪ try, try, try
and you will only come ♪
18
00:01:04,296 --> 00:01:07,732
♪ to this conclusion ♪
19
00:01:07,733 --> 00:01:09,834
♪ love and marriage ♪
20
00:01:18,577 --> 00:01:22,080
Oh, god, the world
is ugly in the morning.
21
00:01:22,081 --> 00:01:23,581
Oh, al.
It's our anniversary
22
00:01:23,582 --> 00:01:26,084
And the kids wanted
to fix us breakfast.
23
00:01:26,085 --> 00:01:27,585
Yeah, they're
great kids.
24
00:01:27,586 --> 00:01:29,587
By the way,
happy anniversary.
25
00:01:29,588 --> 00:01:32,590
Did you brush
your teeth this morning?
26
00:01:32,591 --> 00:01:34,092
No. You?
27
00:01:34,093 --> 00:01:35,994
No.
28
00:01:35,995 --> 00:01:37,295
Happy anniversary, honey.
29
00:01:38,864 --> 00:01:40,865
I could eat a horse.
30
00:01:40,866 --> 00:01:42,366
Me too.
I'm hungry.
31
00:01:42,367 --> 00:01:44,368
I don't smell
anything cooking.
32
00:01:44,369 --> 00:01:46,370
I don't see
anything cooking.
33
00:01:46,371 --> 00:01:48,472
I'm gonna go out
on a limb here--
34
00:01:48,473 --> 00:01:50,308
Nothing's cooking.
35
00:01:50,309 --> 00:01:52,911
I bet they made
something ahead of time
36
00:01:52,912 --> 00:01:54,713
And they're hiding.
37
00:01:54,714 --> 00:01:57,048
[loudly]
ready to surprise us.
38
00:01:57,049 --> 00:01:58,382
Oh.
39
00:01:58,383 --> 00:02:00,551
I'm starving.
What's for breakfast?
40
00:02:00,552 --> 00:02:02,053
Kids!
It's our anniversary.
41
00:02:02,054 --> 00:02:04,488
I thought you wanted
to get up early
42
00:02:04,489 --> 00:02:05,590
And fix us breakfast?
43
00:02:05,591 --> 00:02:07,859
Oh, no.
Was that today?
44
00:02:07,860 --> 00:02:09,293
Uh-huh.
45
00:02:09,294 --> 00:02:10,995
I'm sorry.
46
00:02:10,996 --> 00:02:12,997
Happy anniversary.
47
00:02:12,998 --> 00:02:14,866
What's
for breakfast?
48
00:02:14,867 --> 00:02:17,869
I'll fix us something.
What would you like?
49
00:02:17,870 --> 00:02:20,872
I'd like some
fried eggs over easy,
50
00:02:20,873 --> 00:02:23,875
I'd like couple of pieces
of crisp bacon,
51
00:02:23,876 --> 00:02:26,377
I'd like a glass
of fresh juice, squeezed,
52
00:02:26,378 --> 00:02:29,881
And I'd like a couple of pieces
of toast with jam.
53
00:02:29,882 --> 00:02:31,249
Where's the tang?
54
00:02:34,653 --> 00:02:37,321
You are so immature.
55
00:02:40,259 --> 00:02:42,260
Bud, stop playing
with your clothes.
56
00:02:44,063 --> 00:02:46,131
Well anyway,
happy anniversary, dear.
57
00:02:46,132 --> 00:02:48,699
Can you believe
it's been 16 years?
58
00:02:48,700 --> 00:02:51,069
Yeah, they just
flew by.
59
00:02:51,070 --> 00:02:54,405
Let's see,
now which one is the 16th?
60
00:02:54,406 --> 00:02:57,742
I know the 10th is tin.
61
00:02:57,743 --> 00:02:59,410
The 15th is crystal.
62
00:02:59,411 --> 00:03:01,079
What's the next one?
63
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:02,247
Brimstone.
64
00:03:03,582 --> 00:03:06,084
Gonna get me
a tie again?
65
00:03:06,085 --> 00:03:07,318
Yeah.
66
00:03:07,319 --> 00:03:08,686
Getting me shoes?
67
00:03:08,687 --> 00:03:09,821
Yeah.
68
00:03:09,822 --> 00:03:11,156
From your store?
69
00:03:11,157 --> 00:03:12,490
Yup.
70
00:03:12,491 --> 00:03:15,626
Why don't we just forget
about presents this year?
71
00:03:15,627 --> 00:03:16,995
Fine with me.
72
00:03:16,996 --> 00:03:19,630
I mean, after all, anniversaries
are about being together.
73
00:03:19,631 --> 00:03:20,865
Yeah, you're right.
74
00:03:20,866 --> 00:03:22,366
I'll come home tonight.
How's that?
75
00:03:23,803 --> 00:03:26,404
Yeah, I'll be here,
you'll be here,
76
00:03:26,405 --> 00:03:27,806
The tv will be here.
77
00:03:27,807 --> 00:03:30,508
Let's not make a big deal
about it this year, all right?
78
00:03:30,509 --> 00:03:32,576
Yeah. We don't need
a bunch of silly presents
79
00:03:32,577 --> 00:03:35,079
To show we love
each other.
80
00:03:35,080 --> 00:03:37,015
I know that I love you.
81
00:03:37,016 --> 00:03:38,516
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
82
00:03:38,517 --> 00:03:40,018
I said that I love you.
83
00:03:40,019 --> 00:03:42,921
I said yeah, yeah, yeah.
I got to get ready for work.
84
00:03:42,922 --> 00:03:45,456
Listen, al, since you're not
gonna get me a present,
85
00:03:45,457 --> 00:03:47,125
Do you think you could
take my car
86
00:03:47,126 --> 00:03:48,459
And have a radio installed?
87
00:03:48,460 --> 00:03:50,128
Peg, I don't have the time.
88
00:03:50,129 --> 00:03:52,463
Yeah, but I'm out all day long,
you know, running errands.
89
00:03:52,464 --> 00:03:54,265
What am I supposed
to listen to?
90
00:03:54,266 --> 00:03:55,766
Your own
beautiful voice.
91
00:03:55,767 --> 00:03:58,636
If god didn't want
other people to hear it,
92
00:03:58,637 --> 00:04:00,571
He wouldn't
have made it so shrill.
93
00:04:00,572 --> 00:04:02,506
I'm going
to take a shower.
94
00:04:02,507 --> 00:04:04,108
Yeah, I gotta do the laundry.
95
00:04:04,109 --> 00:04:06,344
When you do the laundry,
you use all the hot water.
96
00:04:06,345 --> 00:04:09,214
If god had wanted you
to have hot water,
97
00:04:09,215 --> 00:04:12,116
He wouldn't have
given me laundry.
98
00:04:12,117 --> 00:04:16,587
Dad, are you really not
gonna get mom a present?
99
00:04:16,588 --> 00:04:21,025
Whoo, bad move.
No matter what she says,
100
00:04:21,026 --> 00:04:22,426
If you don't
get her a present,
101
00:04:22,427 --> 00:04:23,995
You're gonna break her heart.
102
00:04:23,996 --> 00:04:26,831
Yeah. Then she'll
take it out on us.
103
00:04:26,832 --> 00:04:30,101
Dad, even meg's father got
her mom an anniversary present,
104
00:04:30,102 --> 00:04:31,970
And he shot at her.
105
00:04:33,605 --> 00:04:36,607
This is a secret.
And I mean a secret.
106
00:04:36,608 --> 00:04:39,110
I am getting
your mom a present--
107
00:04:39,111 --> 00:04:41,112
One of those
expensive watches
108
00:04:41,113 --> 00:04:43,547
She's always
harping about.
109
00:04:43,548 --> 00:04:46,550
Oh, dad, that's great. She'll
love it, you're the greatest.
110
00:04:46,551 --> 00:04:48,552
Yeah, but listen, don't say
a word to your mother.
111
00:04:48,553 --> 00:04:50,355
Because I want this to be
a surprise, understand?
112
00:04:50,356 --> 00:04:51,555
Not a word.
113
00:04:51,556 --> 00:04:53,524
Right, dad.
114
00:04:57,263 --> 00:04:59,063
Oh, mom, guess what?
115
00:04:59,064 --> 00:05:00,631
Dad's getting
you a great watch.
116
00:05:00,632 --> 00:05:05,536
That is supposed
to be a surprise, butthead.
117
00:05:05,537 --> 00:05:06,971
It's one of those
expensive ones
118
00:05:06,972 --> 00:05:07,972
That you're always
harping about.
119
00:05:07,973 --> 00:05:09,673
Ohh...
120
00:05:09,674 --> 00:05:12,476
What a sweet man.
121
00:05:13,845 --> 00:05:17,848
Yeah, that sweet man
would get me a great gift,
122
00:05:17,849 --> 00:05:20,418
And I'll be sitting there like
a jerk with nothing for him.
123
00:05:20,419 --> 00:05:23,854
Well, I'm gonna go out
and get him something.
124
00:05:23,855 --> 00:05:26,224
What is it
he's really wanting?
125
00:05:26,225 --> 00:05:28,393
That blond
down the street.
126
00:05:30,429 --> 00:05:32,230
Did he tell you that?
127
00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:33,631
No, I just
assumed it
128
00:05:33,632 --> 00:05:35,033
By the way
he bites his fist
129
00:05:35,034 --> 00:05:38,436
Whenever he
drives by her house.
130
00:05:38,437 --> 00:05:40,171
He's just kidding
when he does that.
131
00:05:40,172 --> 00:05:42,740
Excuse me. One second.
132
00:05:45,544 --> 00:05:47,145
Al:
Aah!
133
00:05:49,982 --> 00:05:51,582
Oh, I'm just kidding
when I do that.
134
00:05:51,583 --> 00:05:53,384
You kids go ahead
and get ready for school.
135
00:05:55,354 --> 00:05:56,687
Al:
Aah!
136
00:05:56,688 --> 00:05:57,822
[doorbell rings]
137
00:05:57,823 --> 00:06:01,192
Sorry, al.
I had a huge load of laundry.
138
00:06:06,665 --> 00:06:08,632
Happy anniversary!
Happy anniversary!
139
00:06:08,633 --> 00:06:10,768
Ohh, how thoughtful!
140
00:06:10,769 --> 00:06:14,005
Look, we even put your name
on the label.
141
00:06:14,006 --> 00:06:15,373
Oh, that's too bad.
142
00:06:15,374 --> 00:06:17,608
It would have been nice gift
for us to give somebody,
143
00:06:17,609 --> 00:06:19,177
But thanks anyway.
144
00:06:21,180 --> 00:06:22,680
So...
145
00:06:22,681 --> 00:06:24,849
I guess you guys have
a big evening planned, huh?
146
00:06:24,850 --> 00:06:26,351
Oh, pretty much.
147
00:06:26,352 --> 00:06:28,686
I'll fix dinner.
We'll exchange presents.
148
00:06:28,687 --> 00:06:30,554
Then he'll watch
midget wrestling.
149
00:06:30,555 --> 00:06:32,590
Ooh. What time
does it come on?
150
00:06:32,591 --> 00:06:35,193
Steve! We hate wrestling.
151
00:06:35,194 --> 00:06:38,129
I know. I just
want to know
152
00:06:38,130 --> 00:06:41,765
How late midgets
got to stay up.
153
00:06:41,766 --> 00:06:42,766
Now, peggy...
154
00:06:42,767 --> 00:06:45,669
This is a special
night for you.
155
00:06:45,670 --> 00:06:47,472
And you shouldn't
spend it cooking.
156
00:06:47,473 --> 00:06:49,974
Listen. I know
a great caterer.
157
00:06:49,975 --> 00:06:51,775
Let them do the work.
158
00:06:51,776 --> 00:06:52,977
A caterer?
159
00:06:52,978 --> 00:06:55,946
Yeah. We use them
for all our anniversaries.
160
00:06:55,947 --> 00:06:58,049
The first day we met.
161
00:06:58,050 --> 00:06:59,450
First day we kissed.
162
00:06:59,451 --> 00:07:02,053
The first day
we went out.
163
00:07:02,054 --> 00:07:04,322
The first day
we stayed in.
164
00:07:04,323 --> 00:07:06,357
The first day
you brought me flowers.
165
00:07:06,358 --> 00:07:07,958
The first day you
talked dirty to me.
166
00:07:07,959 --> 00:07:08,959
I love you, steve.
167
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:10,495
I love you too,
marcie.
168
00:07:16,502 --> 00:07:17,868
Do they make veal?
169
00:07:20,339 --> 00:07:21,472
Here we are, sir.
170
00:07:21,473 --> 00:07:23,174
Oh, I think my wife
would like that.
171
00:07:23,175 --> 00:07:25,376
I think she will too,
it's a very nice frame and--
172
00:07:25,377 --> 00:07:28,346
I'm al bundy. I called
about that expensive watch.
173
00:07:28,347 --> 00:07:30,348
Ah, yes.
174
00:07:30,349 --> 00:07:31,849
Here you are, sir.
175
00:07:31,850 --> 00:07:33,351
It's my last one.
176
00:07:33,352 --> 00:07:35,353
Well, wrap it up, and...
177
00:07:35,354 --> 00:07:37,221
Leave the price tag on.
178
00:07:38,690 --> 00:07:40,191
Well, yes, sir.
179
00:07:40,192 --> 00:07:42,726
Will that be
cash or charge?
180
00:07:42,727 --> 00:07:44,529
Charge, and, uh...
181
00:07:44,530 --> 00:07:46,730
Don't get cute
with my carbons.
182
00:07:49,101 --> 00:07:51,969
Wait a second.
I was here first.
183
00:07:51,970 --> 00:07:53,837
Yeah. So were
the indians.
184
00:07:55,140 --> 00:07:56,640
See, I'm in sales myself.
185
00:07:56,641 --> 00:07:58,642
I know how
these guys think.
186
00:07:58,643 --> 00:08:01,479
They see me,
they see a big commission.
187
00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:03,881
They see you,
they see me.
188
00:08:03,882 --> 00:08:06,050
Well, if you're in sales
you should know
189
00:08:06,051 --> 00:08:08,186
Each customer counts
as much as the next.
190
00:08:08,187 --> 00:08:10,788
Yeah right, that's why he let
me butt right in front of you
191
00:08:10,789 --> 00:08:12,123
Like you were never born.
192
00:08:12,124 --> 00:08:14,024
What's that?
193
00:08:14,025 --> 00:08:16,627
It's an anniversary
present for my wife.
194
00:08:16,628 --> 00:08:17,995
You gonna get that?
195
00:08:17,996 --> 00:08:18,996
Yeah.
196
00:08:18,997 --> 00:08:20,198
How many years
you been married?
197
00:08:20,199 --> 00:08:22,333
One.
198
00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:24,335
Well, see, that explains it.
199
00:08:24,336 --> 00:08:26,737
See, you're obviously new
to the married game.
200
00:08:26,738 --> 00:08:28,072
Let me help you out.
201
00:08:28,073 --> 00:08:31,509
See, the first thing I learned
on my 16-year tour of duty
202
00:08:31,510 --> 00:08:34,845
Was that women
live for presents.
203
00:08:34,846 --> 00:08:37,148
Now you take the most ornery
woman in the world.
204
00:08:37,149 --> 00:08:39,383
We'll call her...Peggy.
205
00:08:41,353 --> 00:08:43,554
You bring
a crappy present home,
206
00:08:43,555 --> 00:08:47,258
Like, uh...
That picture frame,
207
00:08:47,259 --> 00:08:50,128
And your life
will be a living hell.
208
00:08:50,129 --> 00:08:52,163
Well, my wife
and I agreed
209
00:08:52,164 --> 00:08:55,032
We wouldn't spend too much
on our anniversary.
210
00:08:55,033 --> 00:08:58,002
We decided we'd save our money
for more important things.
211
00:08:58,003 --> 00:09:01,205
There is no more important thing
than your anniversary.
212
00:09:01,206 --> 00:09:04,008
See, an anniversary
is something special.
213
00:09:04,009 --> 00:09:05,809
It's not like
other holidays
214
00:09:05,810 --> 00:09:08,112
When other people
are celebrating too.
215
00:09:08,113 --> 00:09:10,314
It's just between
the two of you.
216
00:09:10,315 --> 00:09:13,384
See, it's a day
when you can show
217
00:09:13,385 --> 00:09:16,086
How you feel the rest
of the year,
218
00:09:16,087 --> 00:09:18,756
But you don't,
because you're a man.
219
00:09:20,559 --> 00:09:22,226
That's beautiful.
220
00:09:22,227 --> 00:09:23,861
To know me is to love me.
221
00:09:25,730 --> 00:09:28,732
Here comes
how I feel right now.
222
00:09:28,733 --> 00:09:30,734
Sir, your card's
been rejected.
223
00:09:30,735 --> 00:09:31,902
Why?
224
00:09:31,903 --> 00:09:34,639
I don't care. Next.
225
00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:36,140
Wait a second.
It's my anniversary.
226
00:09:36,141 --> 00:09:37,575
Happy anniversary.
227
00:09:37,576 --> 00:09:38,643
Next.
228
00:09:38,644 --> 00:09:40,010
I'll take the watch.
229
00:09:45,384 --> 00:09:48,486
Wow, I wish I could make
stuff like that.
230
00:09:48,487 --> 00:09:51,556
Maybe you can.
Would like to be a chef?
231
00:09:51,557 --> 00:09:54,058
No, I'd rather
be a man.
232
00:10:04,636 --> 00:10:05,969
Don't touch my rosin.
233
00:10:05,970 --> 00:10:08,206
Don't ever touch my rosin.
234
00:10:08,207 --> 00:10:10,208
Sorry.
235
00:10:10,209 --> 00:10:12,142
Gee, you're kind of touchy.
236
00:10:12,143 --> 00:10:14,144
Kind of like a clown
at a birthday party.
237
00:10:14,145 --> 00:10:16,847
Yeah? You ever see
a clown do this?
238
00:10:16,848 --> 00:10:19,049
Ow!
239
00:10:19,050 --> 00:10:20,218
Bobo!
240
00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:22,253
Shut up. I'm not
doing that anymore.
241
00:10:28,026 --> 00:10:29,327
Peggy.
242
00:10:29,328 --> 00:10:31,795
What a beautiful dress.
243
00:10:31,796 --> 00:10:34,365
Thanks. I bought it
this afternoon.
244
00:10:34,366 --> 00:10:35,733
I didn't really like it,
245
00:10:35,734 --> 00:10:38,703
But I didn't feel like changing
back into what I had on.
246
00:10:38,704 --> 00:10:41,305
We were just admiring
your wedding album.
247
00:10:41,306 --> 00:10:43,140
We videotaped
our wedding.
248
00:10:43,141 --> 00:10:45,543
Of course, polaroids
are nice too.
249
00:10:45,544 --> 00:10:47,111
[car door closes]
250
00:10:47,112 --> 00:10:48,713
That's daddy's car.
251
00:10:48,714 --> 00:10:51,249
Okay, that's my watch.
Everyone hide, quick.
252
00:10:51,250 --> 00:10:53,584
In there.
Go on, go on.
253
00:10:58,390 --> 00:11:00,924
Happy anniversary, honey!
254
00:11:00,925 --> 00:11:02,826
See what steve
and marcie sent us?
255
00:11:02,827 --> 00:11:04,629
Yeah, gee,
that's great.
256
00:11:06,231 --> 00:11:08,666
As long as I don't have
to put with them in person.
257
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:10,968
Surprise!
Surprise!
258
00:11:10,969 --> 00:11:13,604
Happy anniversary!
259
00:11:13,605 --> 00:11:15,339
Peg, I thought
we said no big deal.
260
00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:16,741
Oh, it's not big deal.
261
00:11:16,742 --> 00:11:19,243
It's just us and a few
of our closest friends.
262
00:11:26,117 --> 00:11:27,551
And a violinist.
263
00:11:27,552 --> 00:11:29,219
And a few others.
264
00:11:29,220 --> 00:11:30,388
Time for presents.
265
00:11:30,389 --> 00:11:32,723
Peg, I thought
we said no presents.
266
00:11:32,724 --> 00:11:34,792
Well, I know, but it's our
anniversary.
267
00:11:34,793 --> 00:11:37,595
And I couldn't resist.
268
00:11:37,596 --> 00:11:38,729
You didn't tell
your mom
269
00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:40,564
I was gonna get
her a present, did you?
270
00:11:40,565 --> 00:11:42,466
It was kelly, dad.
271
00:11:42,467 --> 00:11:44,234
I know she's your daughter,
272
00:11:44,235 --> 00:11:46,771
But I think she's got to go.
273
00:11:48,340 --> 00:11:51,875
Okay, mom and dad,
open mine first.
274
00:11:51,876 --> 00:11:54,178
You brought me
a present too?
275
00:11:54,179 --> 00:11:57,247
Sure, I wasn't gonna be the only
one here without a present.
276
00:12:03,622 --> 00:12:06,590
All:
Ooh.
277
00:12:09,227 --> 00:12:10,994
A picture frame.
278
00:12:10,995 --> 00:12:12,430
Do you know
how much it cost?
279
00:12:12,431 --> 00:12:13,864
Yes, I do.
280
00:12:15,300 --> 00:12:17,435
The perfect
anniversary gift.
281
00:12:17,436 --> 00:12:19,370
Mine next.
282
00:12:23,007 --> 00:12:24,875
Oh... A diary.
283
00:12:24,876 --> 00:12:28,479
Yeah. It's kelly's.
284
00:12:29,948 --> 00:12:33,451
I heard you say you'd give
anything to take a look at it.
285
00:12:33,452 --> 00:12:35,285
You little wad!
286
00:12:35,286 --> 00:12:36,420
You thief!
287
00:12:36,421 --> 00:12:40,190
You little nazi
fascist psychopath!
288
00:12:40,191 --> 00:12:41,792
Mom, can I have
that back please?
289
00:12:41,793 --> 00:12:43,728
Of course, dear.
290
00:12:43,729 --> 00:12:45,195
They're your
private moments,
291
00:12:45,196 --> 00:12:47,097
And bud had
no right to take it.
292
00:12:47,098 --> 00:12:51,435
It was a nice thought,
though, bud.
293
00:12:51,436 --> 00:12:54,372
You open wound!
294
00:12:54,373 --> 00:12:56,774
Here, we got you two
295
00:12:56,775 --> 00:12:58,409
One of our favorite books.
296
00:12:58,410 --> 00:13:01,712
My partner,my wife, my life.
297
00:13:03,281 --> 00:13:05,983
My god.
298
00:13:05,984 --> 00:13:07,785
Well, that's all
for the presents.
299
00:13:07,786 --> 00:13:09,052
Thank you very much.
300
00:13:09,053 --> 00:13:10,421
Good night,
and drive safely.
301
00:13:10,422 --> 00:13:13,156
No! It's my turn.
302
00:13:13,157 --> 00:13:15,860
Peg, were you here this morning
when we said no presents?
303
00:13:15,861 --> 00:13:18,529
Oh, al.
304
00:13:21,633 --> 00:13:22,900
Here!
305
00:13:25,604 --> 00:13:27,671
Ohh.
306
00:13:34,446 --> 00:13:37,314
All:
Ooh!
307
00:13:38,583 --> 00:13:43,086
The power tools
I've been wanting.
308
00:13:43,087 --> 00:13:45,389
Boy, it's going to be
tough to top this.
309
00:13:45,390 --> 00:13:47,124
So why try?
310
00:13:47,125 --> 00:13:49,259
Good night, everybody!
311
00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:51,094
We all know what
it's time for now.
312
00:13:51,095 --> 00:13:53,531
Yeah, come on, dad.
Whip out that watch.
313
00:13:53,532 --> 00:13:54,598
[doorbell rings]
314
00:13:54,599 --> 00:13:56,400
Ah! The door!
315
00:13:58,236 --> 00:14:00,170
Luke, you're here.
316
00:14:00,171 --> 00:14:01,439
Look, everybody,
it's luke,
317
00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:02,640
And he doesn't
have a present,
318
00:14:02,641 --> 00:14:05,543
But we're not going to hold
it against him, are we?
319
00:14:05,544 --> 00:14:08,546
I'd have to be a pretty big
piece of scum
320
00:14:08,547 --> 00:14:10,213
Not to bring
a present.
321
00:14:11,716 --> 00:14:14,251
You didn't have
to bring a present.
322
00:14:14,252 --> 00:14:17,287
Yes, I did, al.
Peg hates me.
323
00:14:19,558 --> 00:14:22,259
Thank you, luke.
324
00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:25,696
Hey, al, your daughter's
really blossomed.
325
00:14:31,002 --> 00:14:32,002
Where's the eats?
326
00:14:32,003 --> 00:14:33,170
Not now, luke.
327
00:14:33,171 --> 00:14:35,506
We still have one more thing
we have to do.
328
00:14:35,507 --> 00:14:37,341
Yeah, dad.
Get mom's present.
329
00:14:37,342 --> 00:14:38,843
Right. Right.
330
00:14:38,844 --> 00:14:40,177
Uhh...
331
00:14:40,178 --> 00:14:41,846
It's out in the car.
I'll go get it.
332
00:14:47,586 --> 00:14:50,420
[engine struggling]
333
00:14:50,421 --> 00:14:55,793
[engine struggling]
334
00:14:55,794 --> 00:14:56,660
[car door slams]
335
00:14:59,764 --> 00:15:01,932
Happy anniversary!
336
00:15:05,136 --> 00:15:06,470
A can of motor oil.
337
00:15:06,471 --> 00:15:07,571
40-weight.
338
00:15:07,572 --> 00:15:08,706
And, uh...
339
00:15:08,707 --> 00:15:13,010
A road flare.
340
00:15:13,011 --> 00:15:15,579
Bless our happy home.
341
00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:23,387
You didn't
get her anything, huh?
342
00:15:23,388 --> 00:15:25,823
I tried to get her
a watch, but...
343
00:15:25,824 --> 00:15:28,058
Who is this guy?
344
00:15:28,059 --> 00:15:31,094
That's bobo.
345
00:15:33,097 --> 00:15:34,899
Peg, I tried
to get you the watch.
346
00:15:34,900 --> 00:15:37,100
There was some kind of a mix-up
with the credit card.
347
00:15:37,101 --> 00:15:38,435
I'll fix it tomorrow.
348
00:15:38,436 --> 00:15:40,638
Tomorrow is not
our anniversary.
349
00:15:40,639 --> 00:15:42,139
You're taking this well.
350
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:45,108
Well, gifts aren't really
important, are they?
351
00:15:45,109 --> 00:15:46,376
The important thing
352
00:15:46,377 --> 00:15:48,612
Is that you've been
together all these years.
353
00:15:48,613 --> 00:15:51,148
Isn't that what anniversaries
are all about?
354
00:15:51,149 --> 00:15:53,483
Steve, you would
never show up
355
00:15:53,484 --> 00:15:55,553
Without a present
for our anniversary, would you?
356
00:15:55,554 --> 00:15:58,522
Of course not.
I care about you.
357
00:15:58,523 --> 00:16:01,892
Chef:
Dinner is served!
358
00:16:01,893 --> 00:16:05,029
Maybe we ought
to be getting on home.
359
00:16:05,030 --> 00:16:07,397
Oh no, you don't.
I paid for this dinner,
360
00:16:07,398 --> 00:16:08,866
And I'm going
to enjoy it.
361
00:16:08,867 --> 00:16:09,767
Now sit down.
362
00:16:11,970 --> 00:16:13,370
Nice going, dad.
363
00:16:13,371 --> 00:16:15,739
Yeah, dad. Nice.
364
00:16:23,548 --> 00:16:25,248
You know, peg,
I really tried--
365
00:16:25,249 --> 00:16:28,418
I don't want to hear
anymore about it.
366
00:16:28,419 --> 00:16:29,419
Caviar, anyone?
367
00:16:29,420 --> 00:16:32,155
Bud, kelly, steve?
368
00:16:32,156 --> 00:16:37,227
Marcie, luke?
369
00:16:37,228 --> 00:16:39,563
You know, peg I tried
to get you the watch.
370
00:16:39,564 --> 00:16:40,564
It's not my fault.
371
00:16:40,565 --> 00:16:41,832
It's never your fault.
372
00:16:41,833 --> 00:16:44,301
There's gotta be a reason.
I paid the bill.
373
00:16:44,302 --> 00:16:47,337
You were here, I sent the check
in a couple weeks ago.
374
00:16:47,338 --> 00:16:48,338
Give it up, al.
375
00:16:48,339 --> 00:16:49,873
There's nothing wrong
with the card.
376
00:16:49,874 --> 00:16:54,544
I've used it to pay
for this dinner today...
377
00:16:54,545 --> 00:16:58,215
Including this caviar, which
you now have your elbow in.
378
00:16:58,216 --> 00:17:00,718
Well, there's gotta
be some reason.
379
00:17:00,719 --> 00:17:02,486
I've got one.
You're cheap.
380
00:17:02,487 --> 00:17:04,054
Yeah, but not today.
381
00:17:04,055 --> 00:17:07,057
I mean, didn't the guy give you
a hard time about the card?
382
00:17:07,058 --> 00:17:08,558
No, al. Not at all.
383
00:17:08,559 --> 00:17:10,728
Me, neither,
daddy.
384
00:17:10,729 --> 00:17:12,496
You paid with the
credit card too?
385
00:17:12,497 --> 00:17:16,900
Of course, I wasn't
going to spend my allowance.
386
00:17:16,901 --> 00:17:18,669
And peg, sweetie,
387
00:17:18,670 --> 00:17:22,205
Those power tools
that cost a pretty penny,
388
00:17:22,206 --> 00:17:25,175
Was that pretty
penny plastic, peg?
389
00:17:25,176 --> 00:17:26,409
Of course it was, al.
390
00:17:26,410 --> 00:17:28,078
I see.
391
00:17:28,079 --> 00:17:32,950
So I guess the dinner
and the presents...
392
00:17:32,951 --> 00:17:39,023
Old mr. Skinflint here kind of
paid for everything, didn't he?
393
00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:40,924
In fact, the only thing
I didn't pay for
394
00:17:40,925 --> 00:17:42,926
Was my present to you,
and you wanna know why?
395
00:17:42,927 --> 00:17:46,229
Because maybe you stuffed
the credit card so much,
396
00:17:46,230 --> 00:17:49,667
That when I tried
to use it, it threw up.
397
00:17:49,668 --> 00:17:51,401
Blecch!
398
00:17:54,739 --> 00:17:56,040
No, no, no!
399
00:17:56,041 --> 00:17:59,143
Eat. Enjoy. Relax.
400
00:17:59,144 --> 00:18:00,644
I'd like
to thank everybody
401
00:18:00,645 --> 00:18:04,815
For their understanding
in my hour of need.
402
00:18:04,816 --> 00:18:07,017
I'm going
to take my tools,
403
00:18:07,018 --> 00:18:08,018
Which I paid for,
404
00:18:08,019 --> 00:18:10,453
And celebrate
in the garage,
405
00:18:10,454 --> 00:18:12,056
Which I'm
still paying for.
406
00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:23,333
Would you pass
the veal?
407
00:18:23,334 --> 00:18:25,969
You know, peggy,
408
00:18:25,970 --> 00:18:27,137
As a woman,
409
00:18:27,138 --> 00:18:29,306
I never thought I would say
this to another woman,
410
00:18:29,307 --> 00:18:31,541
But you're totally wrong.
411
00:18:31,542 --> 00:18:34,377
I know.
412
00:18:34,378 --> 00:18:35,512
Aren't you
going to apologize?
413
00:18:35,513 --> 00:18:38,048
Well sure,
but not right now.
414
00:18:38,049 --> 00:18:39,649
He won't be
expecting me yet.
415
00:18:39,650 --> 00:18:43,620
See, this is where he likes me
to stew in my own juices.
416
00:18:43,621 --> 00:18:46,223
Could you pass
the sauce?
417
00:18:46,224 --> 00:18:48,425
But you are going to tell him
you're sorry, aren't you?
418
00:18:48,426 --> 00:18:49,827
Ha! No.
419
00:18:49,828 --> 00:18:51,929
You know, that's
the really nice thing about al.
420
00:18:51,930 --> 00:18:54,131
Whenever we have
a major argument,
421
00:18:54,132 --> 00:18:55,899
He never makes
me apologize.
422
00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:57,500
He always always
cuts me off right before
423
00:18:57,501 --> 00:19:00,003
I have to say the s-word.
424
00:19:00,004 --> 00:19:01,571
It's sort of a shorthand.
425
00:19:01,572 --> 00:19:03,006
It comes
with 16 years of marriage.
426
00:19:03,007 --> 00:19:05,976
Aw, honey, I hope that we grow
so close that I never have
427
00:19:05,977 --> 00:19:07,410
To apologize to you.
428
00:19:07,411 --> 00:19:08,445
Steve, you're interrupting.
429
00:19:08,446 --> 00:19:10,080
I'm sorry.
430
00:19:19,357 --> 00:19:22,325
And another thing,
where did you get that dress?
431
00:19:22,326 --> 00:19:24,895
I've had this
for years.
432
00:19:24,896 --> 00:19:29,099
You never notice
what I wear.
433
00:19:31,069 --> 00:19:32,535
What are you
doing out here?
434
00:19:32,536 --> 00:19:34,938
You know.
435
00:19:34,939 --> 00:19:36,173
Look,
I didn't realize
436
00:19:36,174 --> 00:19:38,142
That I put you
over your credit limit.
437
00:19:38,143 --> 00:19:39,743
That's just one
of those things that happen
438
00:19:39,744 --> 00:19:42,179
When you charge
too much.
439
00:19:42,180 --> 00:19:43,180
And?
440
00:19:43,181 --> 00:19:45,649
And after all,
it's your money.
441
00:19:45,650 --> 00:19:46,917
And?
442
00:19:46,918 --> 00:19:48,418
And I don't work.
443
00:19:48,419 --> 00:19:50,654
Feel free to cut me off here
anytime you like.
444
00:19:50,655 --> 00:19:51,655
Not this time,
445
00:19:51,656 --> 00:19:53,523
Because I didn't
do anything.
446
00:19:53,524 --> 00:19:55,292
And I want to hear
you say it.
447
00:19:55,293 --> 00:19:56,526
What, al?
448
00:19:56,527 --> 00:19:59,396
It.
449
00:19:59,397 --> 00:20:03,533
Come on, al.
We both know I am.
450
00:20:03,534 --> 00:20:06,270
Am what, peg?
451
00:20:06,271 --> 00:20:08,172
It.
452
00:20:08,173 --> 00:20:10,040
Very it.
453
00:20:12,343 --> 00:20:13,977
You're
really serious.
454
00:20:13,978 --> 00:20:15,412
Yep.
455
00:20:15,413 --> 00:20:18,081
You see, I thought I finally
saved up enough money
456
00:20:18,082 --> 00:20:20,784
To get you a nice present
that you deserve.
457
00:20:20,785 --> 00:20:24,121
I felt bad walking
in the house without it,
458
00:20:24,122 --> 00:20:28,091
But it was worse thinking
you didn't think I tried.
459
00:20:30,661 --> 00:20:32,362
Yeah. You're right.
460
00:20:32,363 --> 00:20:33,563
You always
do try to do
461
00:20:33,564 --> 00:20:35,833
Something nice
for our anniversary.
462
00:20:35,834 --> 00:20:37,367
Mm-hmm.
463
00:20:37,368 --> 00:20:40,403
And even if you hadn't tried
to buy me that watch,
464
00:20:40,404 --> 00:20:42,572
If the 16 years
we've been together
465
00:20:42,573 --> 00:20:44,274
Isn't enough to say
"I love you,"
466
00:20:44,275 --> 00:20:47,811
Well, what good would
a stupid watch do?
467
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,281
Oh, al.
468
00:20:51,282 --> 00:20:52,282
I really--
469
00:20:52,283 --> 00:20:56,286
We're supposed
to get some rain.
470
00:20:59,457 --> 00:21:00,891
Would you like me
to make soup
471
00:21:00,892 --> 00:21:02,659
For your lunch
tomorrow?
472
00:21:02,660 --> 00:21:03,660
Naw, that's okay.
473
00:21:03,661 --> 00:21:06,429
Last time I cut
my hand on the can.
474
00:21:10,835 --> 00:21:13,270
You know, I really did, feel bad
about not getting your present.
475
00:21:13,271 --> 00:21:16,039
So, I thought of a present
I could get you
476
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,075
That you didn't have
to put on a credit card.
477
00:21:18,076 --> 00:21:21,211
No, not that.
478
00:21:21,212 --> 00:21:24,147
No, because after all,
I wasn't wrong in this.
479
00:21:29,553 --> 00:21:32,555
Anyway, there it is.
480
00:21:32,556 --> 00:21:36,793
Oh, gee, you tore up
my dashboard. Thanks.
481
00:21:36,794 --> 00:21:39,062
Yeah, but look where
the dashboard used to be.
482
00:21:39,063 --> 00:21:41,564
Oh, a radio!
483
00:21:41,565 --> 00:21:44,501
Yeah, I took it out of my car
and put it in yours.
484
00:21:44,502 --> 00:21:46,569
Happy anniversary.
485
00:21:48,706 --> 00:21:50,007
That's so sweet.
486
00:21:50,008 --> 00:21:54,311
I fixed the bass control so
it doesn't vibrate your tush.
487
00:21:54,312 --> 00:21:58,548
Actually,
I kind of like that.
488
00:21:58,549 --> 00:22:04,221
Oh, al, I can't tell you
how much this means to me.
489
00:22:04,222 --> 00:22:05,989
What's that thing
on the front seat?
490
00:22:05,990 --> 00:22:09,326
Oh, that's your
air conditioner.
491
00:22:10,661 --> 00:22:14,497
Hey, listen, you know,
we haven't been alone all day.
492
00:22:14,498 --> 00:22:17,600
Want to sit out here and listen
to the oldies station?
493
00:22:17,601 --> 00:22:19,303
Yeah, sure.
494
00:22:20,638 --> 00:22:23,907
♪ aha, ahawar! Hooh! ♪
495
00:22:23,908 --> 00:22:25,208
Our song!
Our song!
496
00:22:25,209 --> 00:22:27,411
♪ what is it good for? ♪
497
00:22:27,412 --> 00:22:28,946
♪absolutelynothing ♪
498
00:22:28,947 --> 00:22:30,547
♪ say it again, y'all ♪
499
00:22:30,548 --> 00:22:32,882
♪ war! Hooh!Look out ♪
500
00:22:32,883 --> 00:22:35,652
♪ what is it good for? ♪
501
00:22:35,653 --> 00:22:38,388
♪ absolutely nothinglisten to me ♪
502
00:22:38,389 --> 00:22:42,892
♪ ahh war! I despise ♪
503
00:22:42,893 --> 00:22:45,662
♪ 'cause it meansdestruction ♪
504
00:22:48,166 --> 00:22:50,100
[♪]
34821
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