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1
00:00:06,007 --> 00:00:07,484
Oh, man, he was right.
2
00:00:07,508 --> 00:00:08,852
He was just teasing you.
3
00:00:08,876 --> 00:00:11,355
Teasing me? Guy tells me I
look like Charles Laughton.
4
00:00:11,379 --> 00:00:12,655
He's teasing?
5
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,157
Maybe he was talking
to somebody else.
6
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:16,659
Son of a bitch calls
me Charles Laughton.
7
00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:18,328
Charles Laughton
was a terrific actor.
8
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:20,330
Terrific, yeah, but
he had like nine chins.
9
00:00:20,354 --> 00:00:22,165
He had a huge, huge chubby face.
10
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:23,700
You are not getting
a chubby face.
11
00:00:23,724 --> 00:00:25,102
Did you ever see Henry VIII?
12
00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:27,104
He was the guy, he'd
rip open half a goose
13
00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:28,705
and eat it right
there at the table.
14
00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:29,706
You look gorgeous.
15
00:00:29,730 --> 00:00:31,408
I'm getting this double chin.
16
00:00:31,432 --> 00:00:32,909
You are not. Go like this:
17
00:00:32,933 --> 00:00:34,411
Now go like this:
18
00:00:34,435 --> 00:00:35,879
Mm.
19
00:00:35,903 --> 00:00:37,336
Little bit.
20
00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:53,430
♪ Tell me why ♪
21
00:00:53,454 --> 00:00:55,032
♪ I love you like I do ♪
22
00:00:55,056 --> 00:00:56,933
♪ Tell me who ♪
23
00:00:56,957 --> 00:00:59,569
♪ Can stop my heart
As much as you ♪
24
00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:01,204
♪ Tell me all your secrets ♪
25
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:03,440
♪ And I'll tell you
Most of mine ♪
26
00:01:03,464 --> 00:01:05,008
♪ They say nobody's perfect ♪
27
00:01:05,032 --> 00:01:07,477
♪ Well, that's really
True this time ♪
28
00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:11,314
♪ I don't have the answers
I don't have a plan ♪
29
00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:13,417
♪ All I have is you ♪
30
00:01:13,441 --> 00:01:15,052
♪ So darling Help
me understand ♪
31
00:01:15,076 --> 00:01:16,920
♪ What we do ♪
32
00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:18,955
♪ You can whisper in my ear ♪
33
00:01:18,979 --> 00:01:20,657
♪ Where we go ♪
34
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:22,825
♪ Who knows what
happens After here ♪
35
00:01:22,849 --> 00:01:24,894
♪ Let's take each other's hand ♪
36
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:29,132
♪ As we jump Into
the final frontier ♪
37
00:01:29,156 --> 00:01:31,634
♪ I'm mad about you, baby ♪
38
00:01:31,658 --> 00:01:34,104
♪ Yeah ♪
39
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:37,674
♪ I'm mad about you ♪
40
00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:39,631
♪ Whoo-hoo ♪♪
41
00:01:48,409 --> 00:01:50,787
Listen to those high notes.
42
00:01:50,811 --> 00:01:52,989
I'm telling you.
43
00:01:53,013 --> 00:01:54,924
I need you to taste this.
44
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,426
Listen to this.
45
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:57,927
Mm. That's a good finger.
46
00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,429
What about the pasta?
47
00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:00,430
Pasta's also good.
48
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,431
Really?
49
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:02,466
Yeah. Listen to this.
50
00:02:02,490 --> 00:02:03,600
It's flat.
51
00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:05,469
How is that flat? It's gorgeous.
52
00:02:05,493 --> 00:02:06,970
I mean the pasta.
53
00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:08,472
It's bland. It's flat.
54
00:02:08,496 --> 00:02:09,973
It has no purpose.
55
00:02:09,997 --> 00:02:11,475
How much purpose could it have?
56
00:02:11,499 --> 00:02:12,976
There's nothing
special about it.
57
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,812
It's a noodle. We eat it
and then we get rid of it.
58
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,947
Yeah, but what's the point?
59
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,483
Honey, do yourself a favor.
60
00:02:19,507 --> 00:02:23,487
Grab the ladle, give yourself
a little tap on the head.
61
00:02:23,511 --> 00:02:25,989
Does allspice really
have every spice?
62
00:02:26,013 --> 00:02:27,491
Yes it does, everything
except paprika.
63
00:02:27,515 --> 00:02:28,492
Really?
64
00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:29,993
How do I know?
65
00:02:30,017 --> 00:02:31,995
Why'd you make so much?
66
00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:33,497
Because Lisa's coming over.
67
00:02:33,521 --> 00:02:34,498
I'm sorry?
68
00:02:34,522 --> 00:02:35,999
My sister's coming
over for dinner.
69
00:02:36,023 --> 00:02:37,367
What?
70
00:02:37,391 --> 00:02:40,337
Naw, I just thought it was
going to be you and me tonight.
71
00:02:40,361 --> 00:02:41,938
Then you were fooled.
72
00:02:41,962 --> 00:02:42,939
Better?
73
00:02:42,963 --> 00:02:44,441
Yeah. What'd you put in there?
74
00:02:44,465 --> 00:02:45,642
Everything.
75
00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:48,044
That's what it needed.
It's much better.
76
00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:50,947
I mean, why doesn't
she just... Just...
77
00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:53,950
What a clever, clever girl.
78
00:02:53,974 --> 00:02:55,385
It means she's happy.
79
00:02:55,409 --> 00:02:58,288
Don't go hide in the bedroom.
80
00:02:58,312 --> 00:02:59,289
Hey.
81
00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:00,290
Hi.
82
00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:02,225
I'm famous.
83
00:03:02,249 --> 00:03:04,194
My shrink wrote a book.
84
00:03:04,218 --> 00:03:05,562
Manics?
85
00:03:05,586 --> 00:03:07,297
That's been done. Years
ago. Mike Connors. Big hit.
86
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:09,699
No. Manics. Like
more than one manic.
87
00:03:09,723 --> 00:03:11,468
Chapter 26.
88
00:03:11,492 --> 00:03:12,835
Weep for me.
89
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:13,836
"Chapter 26.
90
00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:15,238
Edna on the road to nowhere."
91
00:03:15,262 --> 00:03:16,239
Who's Edna?
92
00:03:16,263 --> 00:03:17,574
Me. I'm Edna.
93
00:03:17,598 --> 00:03:19,242
Wow, I can see why
you'd be so proud.
94
00:03:19,266 --> 00:03:22,579
How do you know it's you?
95
00:03:22,603 --> 00:03:24,581
"resentful of her
mother's large breasts,
96
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:27,651
"Edna doused her brassieres
in kerosene and ignited them."
97
00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:29,152
Oh, my God.
98
00:03:29,176 --> 00:03:31,154
Your mother's got large breasts?
99
00:03:31,178 --> 00:03:32,589
When she was younger.
100
00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:33,657
Then what happened?
101
00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:35,892
They went away. We
don't know. Nobody asks.
102
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:37,394
Isn't this great?
103
00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:38,895
Great? This is terrible.
104
00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:40,397
Are you okay?
105
00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:41,665
Sure. I'm Edna.
106
00:03:41,689 --> 00:03:43,032
This is so sad.
107
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:46,069
I know, it's the saddest
chapter in the whole book.
108
00:03:46,093 --> 00:03:48,572
What about this guy:
"Henry out on a ledge"?
109
00:03:48,596 --> 00:03:49,573
Oh, nothing.
110
00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:52,275
Guy had a couple
breakdowns. Boo-hoo.
111
00:03:52,299 --> 00:03:53,776
Ah, listen to this, interesting:
112
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:56,213
"Edna's earliest sexual fantasy
113
00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:57,447
"can be traced back
114
00:03:57,471 --> 00:03:59,216
to her youthful
preoccupation with clay."
115
00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,918
I just really don't
need to know that.
116
00:04:01,942 --> 00:04:03,353
This is tragic.
117
00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:04,354
I know.
118
00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:05,855
So why are you so happy?
119
00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:08,858
I'm on a road. I've
never had a road before.
120
00:04:08,882 --> 00:04:09,992
She's got a road.
121
00:04:10,016 --> 00:04:11,595
But it's a road to nowhere.
122
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:13,730
At least it's a direction.
123
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:15,532
You're right. You are.
124
00:04:15,556 --> 00:04:17,996
We should celebrate this.
125
00:04:18,259 --> 00:04:19,236
Ugh.
126
00:04:19,260 --> 00:04:20,237
Too spicy?
127
00:04:20,261 --> 00:04:21,238
Ugh.
128
00:04:21,262 --> 00:04:23,740
Paul liked it. Didn't you?
129
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:26,244
Or we could go out.
130
00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:33,116
Ow, ow, ow, ow.
131
00:04:33,140 --> 00:04:34,618
I love hot wax.
132
00:04:34,642 --> 00:04:35,685
You know,
133
00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:38,622
it makes a very
tasty beverage, too.
134
00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:39,789
There you go.
135
00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:41,625
I'm sorry, this is what?
136
00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:42,792
Right, that's your check.
137
00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:45,094
Unless you want to
get something else.
138
00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:46,763
I thought we'd
order dinner first.
139
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:47,764
Oh, right.
140
00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:49,399
What can I get you?
141
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:50,656
Menus.
142
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:53,270
And some water.
143
00:04:53,294 --> 00:04:54,704
Menus and water.
144
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,094
That'll be fine.
145
00:04:58,899 --> 00:05:00,377
"Edna's emotional growth
146
00:05:00,401 --> 00:05:02,879
"was thwarted by
Stella's overbearing
147
00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:04,481
and suppressive ways."
148
00:05:04,505 --> 00:05:05,715
Oh, my God.
149
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:07,717
I am going to get a salad.
150
00:05:07,741 --> 00:05:08,851
This is serious.
151
00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:10,353
This is my family.
152
00:05:10,377 --> 00:05:12,855
Now it's out there in
print for the world to read.
153
00:05:12,879 --> 00:05:14,157
Mom would die.
154
00:05:14,181 --> 00:05:16,393
How is anybody going to
know that it's about your family?
155
00:05:16,417 --> 00:05:18,137
I'm hiring a publicist.
156
00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:21,731
Um, do you need more time?
157
00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,733
Yes, and menus.
158
00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:25,402
And water.
159
00:05:25,426 --> 00:05:26,403
Menus and water.
160
00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:27,404
Oh.
161
00:05:27,428 --> 00:05:28,805
Lisa,
162
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,640
you cannot let Mom read this.
163
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:31,808
I already sent her one.
164
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,142
Are you nuts?
165
00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:36,245
Ooh, that's not a
term we like to use.
166
00:05:36,269 --> 00:05:37,747
She's going to be devastated.
167
00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:39,248
"During Edna's adolescence,
168
00:05:39,272 --> 00:05:40,750
"it was Stella
169
00:05:40,774 --> 00:05:43,186
"that suffocated her
ability to relate to others
170
00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:44,854
and tethered her..."
She was tethered.
171
00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:48,124
"to a lifetime of
insecurity and neurosis."
172
00:05:48,148 --> 00:05:50,527
You're 33 years old. Give it up.
173
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:52,028
Oh, this is interesting.
174
00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:54,030
"and once Edna's
sister got married,
175
00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:56,466
"Edna's screwy life became
a humongous burden
176
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,968
on her very attractive
brother-in-law."
177
00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:00,637
Which I made up, I made it up.
178
00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:03,139
When are you going to stop
blaming Mom for your life?
179
00:06:03,163 --> 00:06:04,240
I don't blame Mom.
180
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:05,375
Well, the book does.
181
00:06:05,399 --> 00:06:07,076
No, the book blames Stella.
182
00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:08,411
Well, who is Stella?
183
00:06:08,435 --> 00:06:09,801
You are.
184
00:06:11,238 --> 00:06:12,816
I'm Stella?
185
00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:14,050
Yeah.
186
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:17,053
Meanwhile, your shrink's
got some schnoz, huh?
187
00:06:17,077 --> 00:06:18,254
Look at that.
188
00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:20,256
How do you mean I'm Stella?
189
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:21,591
I don't know, I guess she
190
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:23,626
couldn't use "Jamie" for
legal reasons or something.
191
00:06:23,650 --> 00:06:25,428
I don't believe this,
I spend half my life
192
00:06:25,452 --> 00:06:28,231
looking after you, and this
is what you think of me?
193
00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:29,899
I thought you'd be happy for me.
194
00:06:29,923 --> 00:06:32,902
Happy about what, that
you're publicly ridiculing me?
195
00:06:32,926 --> 00:06:35,104
Of course that's all you
see, you don't see the fact
196
00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:36,305
that I'm finally getting
some recognition.
197
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:39,008
As a mental patient!
198
00:06:39,032 --> 00:06:40,410
It just kills you
that I'm better
199
00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:41,745
at something than you are.
200
00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:43,747
Honey, say something.
201
00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:44,981
Uh...
202
00:06:45,005 --> 00:06:46,483
What would that be?
203
00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:47,684
Say something,
how would you feel
204
00:06:47,708 --> 00:06:49,586
if you were smeared
all over this book?
205
00:06:49,610 --> 00:06:50,920
Sweetie, it's a stupid textbook
206
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:52,822
written by a stupid
shrink with a big schnoz.
207
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:53,956
Look at the schnoz there.
208
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,558
He's in there. He's Raul.
209
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:56,559
Look.
210
00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,194
Where?
211
00:06:58,218 --> 00:06:59,696
Oh, look at this.
212
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,097
"Stella and Raul."
213
00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:02,699
Yeah, that makes sense,
right? You take Paul,
214
00:07:02,723 --> 00:07:04,300
you add a little leg to the P,
215
00:07:04,324 --> 00:07:06,403
You got "Raul." That is clever.
216
00:07:06,427 --> 00:07:08,905
I just can't believe this is
how you would describe me
217
00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:10,172
to your shrink.
218
00:07:10,196 --> 00:07:12,174
"Stella and Raul lived as though
219
00:07:12,198 --> 00:07:13,676
the world revolved around them."
220
00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:15,978
Hey, I'm in here a lot.
221
00:07:16,002 --> 00:07:17,480
I suffocated your ability
222
00:07:17,504 --> 00:07:19,783
to relate to others?
223
00:07:19,807 --> 00:07:21,183
You never liked
any of my friends.
224
00:07:21,207 --> 00:07:23,586
I got a "way." She says
I have a way about...
225
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:25,522
Do I have a way about me? Yes.
226
00:07:25,546 --> 00:07:26,989
Menus.
227
00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:28,491
You never had any friends.
228
00:07:28,515 --> 00:07:30,993
Which is why I let you
hang around with my friends.
229
00:07:31,017 --> 00:07:32,395
What about Cindy Cline?
230
00:07:32,419 --> 00:07:34,764
She was my friend until
you just took her over.
231
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:37,166
She got sick of you, okay?
She thought you were a flake.
232
00:07:37,190 --> 00:07:39,168
I had to jump in there
and do something before
233
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:40,603
she ditched you all together.
234
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:42,839
Did it ever occur to you that
I may not need your help?
235
00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:44,006
Yeah, right.
236
00:07:44,030 --> 00:07:45,475
Ladies, how are we doing here?
237
00:07:45,499 --> 00:07:47,477
You know what Lisa? I'm so
overbearing? Maybe you're right.
238
00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:49,479
Maybe you'd be
better off without me.
239
00:07:49,503 --> 00:07:50,480
Oh, grow up.
240
00:07:50,504 --> 00:07:51,748
I'll get some water.
241
00:07:51,772 --> 00:07:53,249
No, Lisa, you grow up.
242
00:07:53,273 --> 00:07:55,051
Let somebody else do your
laundry. Have somebody else
243
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:56,853
get their heart broken
trying to fix you up.
244
00:07:56,877 --> 00:07:58,521
Eat dinner with somebody
else every other night.
245
00:07:58,545 --> 00:08:01,390
Fine, I'll hope in a cab
right now, and I'll go home.
246
00:08:01,414 --> 00:08:02,934
Fine. Fine!
247
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:08,665
Oh, you are pathetic.
248
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:11,167
And don't think
you're doing me a favor
249
00:08:11,191 --> 00:08:14,170
because you're the one who
scared me out of taking subways.
250
00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:16,038
Because I care about you!
251
00:08:16,062 --> 00:08:17,507
I don't need this!
252
00:08:17,531 --> 00:08:19,008
Whoa, whoa. Where's Edna going?
253
00:08:19,032 --> 00:08:20,643
I'm never speaking
to my sister again.
254
00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:22,445
Yay.
255
00:08:22,469 --> 00:08:24,909
Can we get a check, please?
256
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:36,559
No, mom.
257
00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:39,061
I'm not going to call her.
258
00:08:39,085 --> 00:08:41,397
I know it's been three days.
259
00:08:41,421 --> 00:08:43,399
Let Lisa be the sane one.
260
00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:45,434
I don't think that's
something that'll happen.
261
00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:47,937
Because she's an idiot.
262
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:49,806
See, I say that, you get mad.
263
00:08:49,830 --> 00:08:51,374
Mom, no, no. Stop it.
264
00:08:51,398 --> 00:08:53,843
We are not going to fight
like this after you're gone.
265
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:55,845
Tell you're just getting
it out of your system now
266
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:58,080
so you can both enjoy
yourselves when she's dead.
267
00:08:58,104 --> 00:08:59,782
I'm on the phone.
268
00:08:59,806 --> 00:09:02,485
I know.
269
00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:03,987
You know what?
It's been 23 years.
270
00:09:04,011 --> 00:09:08,057
I'm sick of hearing
about her ant farm.
271
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:10,949
Mom, hold on one second, okay?
272
00:09:14,821 --> 00:09:15,821
I'm sorry.
273
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,536
Yeah, the thing
about... On page 47...
274
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,037
Yes, about the diary.
275
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:23,573
That wasn't even
me. That was you.
276
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:26,075
No, I'm not saying
you're a bad mother.
277
00:09:26,099 --> 00:09:29,378
Oh, nobody reads the footnotes.
278
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:30,513
Honey!
279
00:09:30,537 --> 00:09:32,415
Paul's calling me. I got to go.
280
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:33,983
Oh! Look what happened in here.
281
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,985
I really, really have to go.
282
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,988
No, I am not going to call her.
283
00:09:39,012 --> 00:09:39,989
Oh, look!
284
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:42,926
I broke the... The big thing.
285
00:09:42,950 --> 00:09:44,561
Bye, mom.
286
00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:46,495
God. "The big thing"?
287
00:09:46,519 --> 00:09:48,130
I couldn't think of anything.
288
00:09:48,154 --> 00:09:49,832
She called me puerile.
289
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:50,833
Well, meanwhile,
290
00:09:50,857 --> 00:09:52,301
not to be whatever,
291
00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:53,502
but I rather dig the fact
292
00:09:53,526 --> 00:09:55,304
that your sister's not
been around for a while.
293
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:56,673
Me too.
294
00:09:56,697 --> 00:09:58,575
You know? No one's
calling us 3 in the morning
295
00:09:58,599 --> 00:10:00,109
to pick her up in Trenton.
296
00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:01,844
Nobody's coming over,
licking the salt off our crackers
297
00:10:01,868 --> 00:10:03,580
and putting them back.
298
00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:04,948
She's really selfish isn't she?
299
00:10:04,972 --> 00:10:05,949
She's very selfish.
300
00:10:05,973 --> 00:10:07,416
She's petty. She's
petty and selfish.
301
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:08,851
I'm going to call her right now.
302
00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:11,454
And tell her what?
303
00:10:11,478 --> 00:10:12,956
All right. You're right.
304
00:10:12,980 --> 00:10:14,457
Let her call me.
305
00:10:14,481 --> 00:10:16,593
Let her call you.
306
00:10:21,588 --> 00:10:22,565
Lisa?
307
00:10:22,589 --> 00:10:24,567
Probably. She would
call and hang up.
308
00:10:24,591 --> 00:10:26,402
She's the one who's puerile.
309
00:10:26,426 --> 00:10:28,793
Childish. That's what I thought.
310
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,611
Oh, ho, ho, you got to remember,
311
00:10:34,635 --> 00:10:36,613
when I first started
singing scat,
312
00:10:36,637 --> 00:10:38,114
nobody dug it.
313
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:41,050
They didn't appreciate
what I was doing.
314
00:10:41,074 --> 00:10:42,986
So who gave you the
name "King of Scat"?
315
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:43,987
I did.
316
00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:45,488
Can you do that?
317
00:10:45,512 --> 00:10:48,591
Are you allowed to just
declare yourself king?
318
00:10:48,615 --> 00:10:49,981
Yes, you are.
319
00:10:51,785 --> 00:10:53,262
What if there's another guy,
320
00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:54,797
he says he's the king?
321
00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:56,298
Then they joust.
322
00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:59,201
Oh, I learned scat
from my Uncle Cecil.
323
00:10:59,225 --> 00:11:00,225
He was...
324
00:11:02,929 --> 00:11:04,406
His Uncle Cecil
325
00:11:04,430 --> 00:11:07,298
was a prammatee
and a dweezil bone?
326
00:11:08,769 --> 00:11:11,209
Unless this guy is lying.
327
00:11:12,205 --> 00:11:13,683
Back then, it was...
328
00:11:14,708 --> 00:11:16,585
You understand
what this guy's saying?
329
00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:18,977
Yes. Yes, I do.
330
00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:22,692
Oh, oh,
331
00:11:22,716 --> 00:11:24,193
back then, it was...
332
00:11:25,418 --> 00:11:28,031
We'd sing away on
the tips of our toes?
333
00:11:28,055 --> 00:11:29,032
Look it.
334
00:11:29,056 --> 00:11:30,533
If I tell you,
335
00:11:30,557 --> 00:11:32,969
how are you going to learn?
336
00:11:33,994 --> 00:11:34,971
Oh, oh.
337
00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:35,972
Back then,
338
00:11:35,996 --> 00:11:36,996
it was...
339
00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:38,975
Back then,
340
00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:40,999
we would send
away for our elbows.
341
00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:43,312
We would...
342
00:11:43,336 --> 00:11:45,314
We would sing towards our nose?
343
00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:46,816
What?! What is he saying?
344
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,751
Only the club in Houston
345
00:11:48,775 --> 00:11:50,486
would pay them cash.
346
00:11:50,510 --> 00:11:51,743
Hey.
347
00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:55,357
Hi. What are you doing here?
348
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,860
It's not like I've never
been here before.
349
00:11:57,884 --> 00:12:00,362
No, it's very much like
you've never been here before.
350
00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:01,363
Whatever. Hey, Warren.
351
00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:02,431
Hi, Edna.
352
00:12:02,455 --> 00:12:04,067
You read it?
353
00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:05,568
I read it out loud.
354
00:12:05,592 --> 00:12:06,869
Me too.
355
00:12:06,893 --> 00:12:08,871
I thought that was you.
356
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:10,139
Lis...
357
00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:12,141
What do you make of this?
358
00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:13,142
Oh, oh.
359
00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:14,643
Back then, it was...
360
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:17,847
Oh, yeah, that's true.
361
00:12:17,871 --> 00:12:21,050
All the clubs in
Houston did pay cash.
362
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:23,352
All right, all
right. So, Pauly...
363
00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:24,587
What?
364
00:12:24,611 --> 00:12:27,590
How's everything going
over at, uh, you know?
365
00:12:27,614 --> 00:12:28,591
The apartment?
366
00:12:28,615 --> 00:12:29,859
Wherever.
367
00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:32,095
It's okay.
368
00:12:32,119 --> 00:12:33,952
Yeah? And how's
Murray and, um...
369
00:12:35,956 --> 00:12:36,999
The doorman?
370
00:12:37,023 --> 00:12:38,367
Whoever.
371
00:12:38,391 --> 00:12:40,103
She's good. Call her.
372
00:12:40,127 --> 00:12:42,205
Why should I?
Because you should.
373
00:12:42,229 --> 00:12:43,472
Oh, you mean because I'm wrong?
374
00:12:43,496 --> 00:12:45,374
No, no, no, I didn't say that.
375
00:12:45,398 --> 00:12:49,311
You know, I bet Sybil's
sister was proud of her.
376
00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:50,312
Sybil who?
377
00:12:50,336 --> 00:12:51,814
You know, Sybil, Sybil.
378
00:12:51,838 --> 00:12:53,315
You know, the
one with Sally Field,
379
00:12:53,339 --> 00:12:55,818
but she had a book first, too.
380
00:12:55,842 --> 00:12:58,320
I don't think she had a sister.
381
00:12:58,344 --> 00:12:59,822
Well, she must've had a cousin
382
00:12:59,846 --> 00:13:02,324
or someone who
would not yell at her
383
00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:04,360
when she was in a
restaurant or ridicule her,
384
00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:06,362
or pick on her, make
her feel like a screw-up
385
00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:10,299
just because she didn't have
a job, a boyfriend, or a pen.
386
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:12,869
A pen? Yeah, yeah,
remember the time
387
00:13:12,893 --> 00:13:14,871
she asked me for a
pen. I didn't have one,
388
00:13:14,895 --> 00:13:16,338
and I saw her roll her eyes.
389
00:13:16,362 --> 00:13:18,474
So she rolled her eyes.
That's what she does.
390
00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:20,709
You don't have a pen.
That's what you do.
391
00:13:20,733 --> 00:13:21,911
Call her.
392
00:13:21,935 --> 00:13:24,313
You know, I could
get a pen if I wanted to.
393
00:13:24,337 --> 00:13:26,615
I've always said
that about you, yes.
394
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,617
What's that going to prove?
395
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,920
I don't know what
to tell you, Lis.
396
00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,288
You shouldn't be talking to me,
397
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,991
you should be talking to Jamie
about this. Talk to Jamie, huh?
398
00:13:35,015 --> 00:13:36,592
No, she's only going
to agree with herself.
399
00:13:36,616 --> 00:13:40,396
Why can't I just talk
to you for a while?
400
00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:41,397
Sure.
401
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:42,398
Sure.
402
00:13:42,422 --> 00:13:43,900
So, what's new?
403
00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:45,301
I started my period
20 minutes ago.
404
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:46,357
Oh, good.
405
00:13:53,233 --> 00:13:56,212
So, anyway, I say hello,
and she just hangs up.
406
00:13:56,236 --> 00:13:58,214
Like I don't know it's Lisa.
407
00:13:58,238 --> 00:13:59,215
Two coffees.
408
00:13:59,239 --> 00:14:00,216
Wait.
409
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:02,051
Where?
410
00:14:02,075 --> 00:14:03,219
For here.
411
00:14:03,243 --> 00:14:04,553
Two coffees for here, please.
412
00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:05,554
Right. Okay.
413
00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:08,691
Oh. What's wrong?
414
00:14:08,715 --> 00:14:09,892
I think I'm getting a cold.
415
00:14:09,916 --> 00:14:11,093
Now.
416
00:14:11,117 --> 00:14:12,528
The heat's been
off in my apartment.
417
00:14:12,552 --> 00:14:13,696
Have you called your landlord?
418
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,631
Of course I called my landlord.
419
00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:18,367
But you know how
they can jerk you around.
420
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:19,535
Want me to call them?
421
00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:21,904
And say what?
That you're my friend
422
00:14:21,928 --> 00:14:24,874
and you're outraged
that I have no heat?
423
00:14:24,898 --> 00:14:27,543
Yes. Call the tenants
association. Want me to call?
424
00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:29,345
James, I am not Lisa.
425
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:30,746
I know. Now.
426
00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:31,948
I can take care of myself.
427
00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:32,982
I know. Now.
428
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:34,350
You don't have to fix my life.
429
00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:36,953
I know, I know. Fran, you know
what? You're going to blow it.
430
00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,243
Let me just finish this up.
431
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:52,534
Well, is he cute?
432
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,036
So go introduce yourself.
433
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,838
Who are you talking to?
434
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:56,839
Ira.
435
00:14:56,863 --> 00:14:58,341
Who do you think I'm talking to?
436
00:14:58,365 --> 00:15:00,209
Lis, why would he not like you?
437
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:01,310
What are you doing?
438
00:15:01,334 --> 00:15:03,279
She called. So I picked it up.
439
00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:05,081
What does she
want? Hang on a sec.
440
00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:07,783
She thinks Liam Neeson
moved into her building.
441
00:15:07,807 --> 00:15:11,120
Well, she thought she had
Lyndon Johnson for algebra.
442
00:15:11,144 --> 00:15:12,454
Jamie.
443
00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:13,789
What? What about me?
444
00:15:13,813 --> 00:15:15,724
Nothing. She just wants
to know who I'm talking to.
445
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:19,896
Who does she think
you're talking to? My God.
446
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:20,930
Wow. Listen,
447
00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:22,431
I got to go.
448
00:15:22,455 --> 00:15:23,933
I... I'll call you tomorrow.
449
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:25,401
I won't forget.
450
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:26,535
All right. Bye.
451
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:28,938
Why was she calling
here at 3 in the morning?
452
00:15:28,962 --> 00:15:30,539
She always calls
at 3 in the morning.
453
00:15:30,563 --> 00:15:33,042
She and her friend
went to this thing...
454
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:35,444
I don't want to know.
455
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:37,780
All right. What friend?
456
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:38,781
Harriet.
457
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:39,949
Which Harriet?
458
00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:41,417
I don't know. She
knows two Harriets.
459
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:44,520
The bulimic one.
They're both bulimic.
460
00:15:44,544 --> 00:15:47,189
Your sister knows two...
Two bulimics named Harriet?
461
00:15:47,213 --> 00:15:48,524
Yes.
462
00:15:48,548 --> 00:15:50,592
What the hell are
the odds of that?
463
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:52,028
Where did they go?
464
00:15:52,052 --> 00:15:53,862
Some new club or
something. Oh, God.
465
00:15:53,886 --> 00:15:55,531
Sounded pretty cool.
They had snakes.
466
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:57,199
And she thinks she
saw Ethel Kennedy.
467
00:15:57,223 --> 00:15:59,501
Why are you encouraging her?
468
00:15:59,525 --> 00:16:00,970
I'm not. I'm just listening.
469
00:16:00,994 --> 00:16:03,505
You know what it means when
she spends time with Harriet?
470
00:16:03,529 --> 00:16:05,041
Which one? Either one.
471
00:16:05,065 --> 00:16:08,077
I really don't. Honey, I'm new
to this whole world of Harriets.
472
00:16:08,101 --> 00:16:10,046
Well, I'm not,
and I'm telling you.
473
00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:11,080
What? You're telling me what?
474
00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:13,215
Never mind. Let her
make her own mistakes.
475
00:16:13,239 --> 00:16:15,884
And you can pick up the pieces.
476
00:16:15,908 --> 00:16:16,953
What pieces?
477
00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:19,021
You'll see. There's
always pieces with her.
478
00:16:19,045 --> 00:16:20,622
So why don't you do
something about this?
479
00:16:20,646 --> 00:16:22,825
Like what? Call her.
480
00:16:22,849 --> 00:16:24,827
I'm not going to call her.
She doesn't need me.
481
00:16:24,851 --> 00:16:26,495
She's got you and two Harriets.
482
00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:28,130
The Harriets are
going to Disneyland.
483
00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:31,422
Well, then I guess
that leaves you.
484
00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:40,376
Ooh, right here we put in
the Chet Baker footage?
485
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:41,743
What'd you have for lunch?
486
00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:43,212
Harriet.
487
00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:45,448
No, well, that's the
thing about crab cakes.
488
00:16:45,472 --> 00:16:46,949
We don't even have that.
489
00:16:46,973 --> 00:16:48,150
Did you call the lab yet?
490
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,353
On what, my shoe?
491
00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:51,387
Lis, Lis...
492
00:16:51,411 --> 00:16:52,388
Harriet, wait one second.
493
00:16:52,412 --> 00:16:54,823
Sh.
494
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,360
We need the phone, Lisa.
We are trying to work here.
495
00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,628
You know, I'm going to
have to call you back. Okay.
496
00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:01,364
What are we doing here?
497
00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:03,399
Well, Warren and I are
trying to cut the sequence,
498
00:17:03,423 --> 00:17:05,267
And you are... You were...
499
00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:07,003
See, that's where I'm
stumped. I don't know.
500
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:08,270
You mean you want me to leave?
501
00:17:08,294 --> 00:17:11,207
I don't want you... it's just...
502
00:17:11,231 --> 00:17:12,808
I don't want to
hog your time up.
503
00:17:12,832 --> 00:17:14,043
Oh, that's okay.
504
00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:15,444
Do you like this scarf?
505
00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:17,946
I like the scarf a lot. Yes.
506
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:20,149
I think it's too busy.
507
00:17:20,173 --> 00:17:22,651
Leave her alone. You know
what? We can't even do that.
508
00:17:22,675 --> 00:17:24,253
I'm wrong, we can't
use the piece here
509
00:17:24,277 --> 00:17:25,654
because the other
stuff we have doesn't...
510
00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:27,223
Blah, blah, blah.
511
00:17:27,247 --> 00:17:29,558
Don't you ever talk about
anything but movies?
512
00:17:29,582 --> 00:17:31,427
No, we don't. So you know what?
513
00:17:31,451 --> 00:17:33,762
If we're boring you,
I would suggest...
514
00:17:33,786 --> 00:17:35,631
Oh, great. Now
you're mad at me too.
515
00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:37,833
No, I'm not mad at you.
It's just that, you know,
516
00:17:37,857 --> 00:17:39,235
we're under a lot
of pressure here.
517
00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:41,037
Well, I... You're having
a tough week too.
518
00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:43,539
I understand that so, I'm
sorry. I didn't mean to...
519
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,674
Whatever you need, huh?
520
00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:46,942
Thank you. All right.
521
00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:49,934
Will you go to the
dentist with me?
522
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:56,052
Hey.
523
00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:57,386
I just want you to
know something.
524
00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:58,654
Yes? You see this?
525
00:17:58,678 --> 00:17:59,655
Four yearbooks from high school,
526
00:17:59,679 --> 00:18:01,524
four yearbooks from college,
527
00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:03,092
three yearbooks from camp.
528
00:18:03,116 --> 00:18:04,626
There are over
200 signatures here,
529
00:18:04,650 --> 00:18:06,962
and not one of them
said I was overbearing.
530
00:18:06,986 --> 00:18:09,098
Well, that settles
that, doesn't it?
531
00:18:09,122 --> 00:18:11,700
I tried to call you and Warren
said you were with Lisa.
532
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:14,537
I had to take her to the
dentist thank you very much.
533
00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:16,105
Why did she need you there?
534
00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:18,107
Because you're
not talking to her,
535
00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:20,109
and she says the laughing gas
536
00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:21,610
makes her depressed.
537
00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:23,112
Is she okay?
538
00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:25,548
Ah-ha, you see? You do miss her.
539
00:18:25,572 --> 00:18:27,583
Why would I miss her?
Because she's your sister.
540
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,385
So what? So that's
how it should be.
541
00:18:29,409 --> 00:18:31,787
You know, look, I talk to
you, and you talk to me.
542
00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:32,988
But you should talk to Lisa.
543
00:18:33,012 --> 00:18:34,790
And Lisa should talk
to you about her dentist
544
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:37,059
and leave me the hell
out of it. That's our world.
545
00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:38,860
Right now our world's
a little out of whack,
546
00:18:38,884 --> 00:18:40,196
it's a wacky world.
547
00:18:40,220 --> 00:18:42,064
Well, you're going to
have to get used to it.
548
00:18:42,088 --> 00:18:44,333
Mm. I can get used to anything,
549
00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:46,802
But I just... Frankly, it hurts
me to see you so unhappy.
550
00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:49,238
You are so full of crap.
551
00:18:49,262 --> 00:18:50,239
Nevertheless...
552
00:18:50,263 --> 00:18:51,740
Oh, come on.
553
00:18:51,764 --> 00:18:53,509
Stella!
554
00:18:53,533 --> 00:18:54,643
Don't you call me Stella.
555
00:18:54,667 --> 00:18:55,811
Sorry, I was kidding.
556
00:18:55,835 --> 00:18:57,413
Listen, just don't make
me do this anymore.
557
00:18:57,437 --> 00:18:58,914
I'm begging you. Take her back!
558
00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,583
You can't handle
her for one week?
559
00:19:00,607 --> 00:19:01,783
You're going to talk to her.
560
00:19:01,807 --> 00:19:03,586
I'm not calling her.
You don't have to.
561
00:19:03,610 --> 00:19:04,786
She's right outside in the hall.
562
00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:05,954
What?
563
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:07,956
They gave her too much Novocain.
564
00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,425
I couldn't send
her home like that.
565
00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:10,449
Come here.
566
00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:12,961
All right, you hear that?
567
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:14,497
Hear what?
568
00:19:14,521 --> 00:19:16,641
She's saying to you, saying
"Jamie, I'm sorry," right?
569
00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:21,504
Either that or the club in
Houston pays her cash.
570
00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:23,372
Are you sorry? Are you sorry?
571
00:19:23,396 --> 00:19:24,373
What?
572
00:19:24,397 --> 00:19:26,208
Are you sorry? Are you sorry?
573
00:19:26,232 --> 00:19:27,876
Are you sorry?
574
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:30,078
I'm sorry, that's all I
know. I'm very sorry.
575
00:19:30,102 --> 00:19:32,581
The stuff you said in
that book really stinks.
576
00:19:34,106 --> 00:19:36,418
"My shrink wrote that, not me."
577
00:19:36,442 --> 00:19:37,919
Well, where'd she get it from?
578
00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:41,657
"I don't know. I just
lie there and gamble."
579
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,559
Ramble. It's got to be ramble.
580
00:19:44,984 --> 00:19:47,563
"Half the time, my
shrink's not even listening."
581
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:50,232
Did you tell her that
I was overbearing?
582
00:19:50,256 --> 00:19:51,233
Yeah. No.
583
00:19:51,257 --> 00:19:52,257
Yes, yes.
584
00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:56,505
"But I didn't say there is
anything wrong with it."
585
00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:58,507
So you like that
I'm overbearing?
586
00:20:00,466 --> 00:20:02,944
"Of course. That way I
can be underbearing."
587
00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:04,880
Is that really what
you just said?
588
00:20:04,904 --> 00:20:06,182
Mm-hm.
589
00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:08,116
Well, then, I am sorry.
590
00:20:09,141 --> 00:20:10,141
"Screw you?"
591
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:12,521
You too?
592
00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:13,522
Yeah.
593
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:14,823
All right. You know what?
594
00:20:14,847 --> 00:20:16,024
All right, you know what?
595
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:17,993
You're drooling on your
beautiful shirt. Come here.
596
00:20:18,017 --> 00:20:20,696
She says, "It's your shirt."
I know what she said.
597
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:21,720
Your skirt.
598
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:24,700
Wrong?
599
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:25,767
Uh, Al Hirt.
600
00:20:25,791 --> 00:20:27,269
Something about Al Hirt.
601
00:20:27,293 --> 00:20:28,770
I don't know.
602
00:20:28,794 --> 00:20:30,961
I don't know.
603
00:20:43,776 --> 00:20:46,655
Here you go.
604
00:20:46,679 --> 00:20:49,191
Ursula, this is our bedroom.
605
00:20:49,215 --> 00:20:51,148
Oh, right. Okay.
41066
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