Original subtitles

Dad, get some pics.

Get my whip in.

-Can you see the car? -Yep.

Ta.

-That's actually good. -This is Harrison, the young kid--

-How are ya? -Not bad, thanks.

Bit dusty, myself. I was cooked last night.

-Yeah? -Yeah. You go out, or--

No, not last night.

-Cool. How old are ya? -I'm 19, so...

Yeah, right.

Yeah, that's my car.

So turning 30 next week, so Dad started the transition

of handing over the CEO role to me.

Who wrote this?

"Heaps of natural light and a kitchen to delight.

This house is so dope when you see it you won't cope"?

-Yeah, people like rhymes. -Who writes your copy?

-I write my own copy. You know-- -Our clients are not gonna like that.

You gotta run those things past us, mate, as a family.

So when I'm CEO, you want me to fucking, like, go visit you

in the bloody nursing home and ask you what--

-You're not CEO yet. Still two weeks. -Stop showing off in front of him.

Usually it's just me and Dad on the job,

but he's hired this new junior assistant to be my off-siter.

His name's Harrison. He's this 19-year-old bloke.

He's-- Seems like a bit of a weirdo.

Right, just let me do the talking when we get in there.

-Rob, how are you, mate? Beth. -Quentin, how are you?

-Let's get on with this. -And is it..."

-Harrison, yeah. -Harrison.

This is a really lovely place you've got. Really nicely done-up.

Is it all you? -Yes, it's all me.

Little Harry just started today, so he's new to the game.

I'll be your main contact, so...

-Harry? -Well, it is Harrison.

It's whatevs. I'll be the one looking after things.

It's about getting the place on point, looking good,

so things like these frames, these are kind of early noughties,

that stuff needs to go.

No one wants to see that.

This kind of thing, that's too fussy. Get rid of it.

So, sale price, we're still keen on the 1.2 mil mark, are we?

I thought it was 2.2.

Brian said we quoted for 2.2.

-Yeah, definitely 2.2. -No, I've got a... one...

Oh, shit, no. My two was a one, yes.

Two point two mil. Yes, that is the price. Cool.

He's definitely gonna need some training.

He's a little too cocky for my liking at this stage.

In fact, I'll get you to get a scented candle for here,

just to get rid of that funky smell or whatever that odor is.

I like this Oriental piece you got there.

This is nice, too. Is that a fiddle leaf figurine, is it?

Oh, shit. Sorry.

That should be in the middle for Wednesday's inspection.

You don't want people knocking that over. These are lovely, Rob.

-Is that western redcedar, is it? -Actually looks like jarrah, Quentin.

Yeah, it's jarrah.

-Don't correct me, mate. -Sorry.

Let your negative thoughts be gone.

You have nothing to worry about.

You are in control of your own life.

He's telling me that he thinks the cat will kill him during the night.

-What's the cat's name? -Pooples.

Pooples will not kill you, darling.

If anything, Pooples-- You could kill Pooples yourself. You're a huge dog.

Being a pet psychic to the stars is a multifaceted job.

Put simply, the pets hear me, and I hear them.

The channels of communication are wide open.

Put the pen in my hand, please, Kylie.

My pen work is a visual representation

of the telepathic messages coming from the pet.

She's telling me she has issues with her tail.

She doesn't like the way that it looks.

Okay.

Now, do you pet your cat and then go onto the tail like that?

-Yeah. -Don't do it. Don't do that.

You're drawing attention to her insecurities.

In her mind, this tail is hideous.

When I address the tail, you will see the head goes in like this.

That is her embarrassment.

If a cat could blush, she would be blushing right now.

All of us, don't look at the tail.

And the head comes out.

Smile, darling.

Smile for Jana.

Now, what this can do is it increases the serotonin uptake

and help her depression vastly, so.

And I'll get you to do this every day for an hour, at least.

We'll just try ten minutes now.

Jana can feel your sadness, Kaka.

This will make you happier, darling.

Don't cry, darling.

I do a lot of Reiki and body sweep work on pets,

removing energy blocks and emotional clearing work.

It's very healing.

I'm going to do something now

where I talk to Juju in a language that only he can understand.

Now, what I'm going to ask you to do is to faint in front of Kaka,

because what Coco is telling me is that she thinks that if you may collapse,

she may not be able to revive you,

and she will starve and die.

Okay, Kaka, looking at your owner and...

Faint.

Oh, my God! Your owner's just died!

She's died!

Darling, why are you not more worried? Your owner is dead.

So, Nancy and Tonya were lovers? Yes.

I also do medium work.

I talk to pets that may have passed over.

All right, Nancy, Tonya wants me to tell you

that she's very happy that she passed when she did.

Okay, I'm losing her. I need some body contact, please.

Sometimes the medium work can drain me of energy

and human contact can act as a recharge.

Kylie is integral to my readings.

So, I'm losing her again. Give me some more. Squeeze me hard.

Okay.

Now she's telling me that she thinks her nose looks like a penis.

And she knows that you think that, too, sometimes.

Now, I want you to touch only from the neck down.

Just along the back, the bottom.

Stay away from her dick nose for at least a month. Okay?

Yes, hello.

I also do readings remotely.

I just need a photo on my computer.

Do you call him "My Llama"? Yes, you do. Okay.

He wants you to know that he's an alpaca.

Jana wants you to stick your head out as far as it can go.

Keep your turtle head out of your shell, Thelma. Keep it out.

But nothing beats the intimacy of a home reading.

My clients' pets are always on my mind.

It's a 24/7 job.

Good night, Lilly.

Good night, Simon.

Time heals every wound, Susan. Good night.

Jana understands, darling. Jana understands.

The thing is, this mansion is hella scary at night.

Like, normally I'm no fucks given,

but this place, look at it. It's like fuck level scary.

I keep thinking some zombie cunt's gonna walk in low-key

wearing armor or some shit.

I made my cousin Dylan sleep in the room with me to make it less scary,

-but still it's ballsack scary. -Dylan. Cunt.

Like, last night, I lost all chill.

Shit cunt! What was that?

And the toilet is, like, 50 million meters from here,

so, 'cause I drink one of these per night,

I have to piss, like, four to five times.

Or if I'm laying cable,

it's too far to walk,

and I literally cannot deal.

The other night,

I accidentally went into... my cousin Clementine's room,

and I accidentally pissed in an antiques vase

'cause I thought it was the toilet.

And then I got in bed with her because I thought it was my bed,

and then she goes ballistic and, like, screams so loud

that wakes up my auntie and uncle.

Gavin!

Get out, Gavin!

Chill, bitch.

Get out!

This whole mansion is freezing as clit at night.

So, if I want a midnight snack,

I've been wearing my auntie's shoes

'cause I don't want my feet to freeze their dicks off.

My auntie's getting all mad saying I can't wear her shoes,

but she's asleep, she's not even wearing 'em.

And my uncle got hella mad at me because...

the other night I got a stiffy, right? And I couldn't get it down,

and I needed to piss,

so I just pissed in the bathtub.

What did he want me to do? Go outside and make a fountain?

Hell, no.

Les, come in. Victor Charlie Charlie.

It's Joyce.

Come in, Les.

Are you there? Do you read me?

Come in.

Buggeration. I bloody-- I had him on here this morning before you lot were here.

This is my boyfriend, Les. He's a truck driver.

He's always on the road, but he comes in lunchtime,

and we chat all the time on the radio.

I don't think I've seen the guy for a couple months, or maybe years,

but we do talk a lot.

Yeah, he's another collector, too.

Yeah, I met him at a sale of ours.

We're gonna run the museum together, the two of us.

I'll try again. It's Joyce. Do you read me?

Victor Charlie Charlie Foxtrot. Do you read me?

You're five minutes early.

Oh, hun, had such a good run.

-And no cigar again. -Bye, Bill.

Hugs!

Well, I'm here nearly every day. Neither of us work.

When we're not shopping for the collection we're here pretty much doing,

well, God knows what.

I think they say, "Time flies when you're best friends."

Oh, yeah.

Come on, get up.

We just know how to have a good time.

Hi, moll.

Hi, moll.

Hi, moll.

I like to make up songs around the house, just make up my own words.

Get off the couch, you lazy moll

And they're really catchy, too. I find myself just singing along.

I don't even mean to.

Get off the couch, you lazy moll

Okay. Here she comes.

Oh, and then, we have Princess Diana Day.

Now, that's once a month.

Lady Di is in the house!

Lady Di is here. How are you?

Where's Elton John?

I don't even care about Prince Charles.

He can do whatever.

Where's Cocky?

What about Where's Cocky? I could play Where's Cocky all day.

Oh, he's taking off!

Oh, run! He's got beer! Look at that! He's got a bloody beer!

Wanna pat Cocky?

-Where's Cocky? -I even like playing it by myself.

Where's Cocky? There's Cocky!

Oh, yeah, she's a bit of a worrier, our Joycey.

Always worrying about something.

Only yesterday she was upset about some clothes she hadn't worn for a year.

Why didn't I wear you?

You just sat in my cupboard!

I do worry.

I worry about silly things like

door ha-- I was telling you about that door handle.

Yeah.

I worry that I might come in at night

and I might trip over, and this might slip into my mouth.

Like that, and just rip the side of my cheek off.

Like that could happen, and then I'd have no cheek.

This is my secrecy wall that me and my dad built,

so I can spy on my toys.

There's all my toys here.

'Cause if you watch your toys and they don't think you're looking,

then you can catch them doing things.

Sit here, okay?

Sit. Shhh.

It’s a turtle. Look at the unicorn and the tiger.

I just love them more than you'll ever know.

I love them so much!

Did Snoopy move?

I just-- Snoopy's paw moved!

Snoopy's paw! I guarantee you! Did you see Snoopy’s paw just move?

His back leg was...

Oh, my God, that was mental!

You into Burning Man at all?

It's this lit festival that's fucking life-changing, mate.

I go fuckin' loose at festivals, and Burning Man is dusty as fuck.

There's chicks with their tits out and fucking--

Just coming up to you and, like, fucking--

-Oh, jeez. -So good, mate.

Like, I haven't been, but yeah, so--

I'm keen to go, like next year or some shit.

Yeah. That's cool, man.

Got this app in development at the moment, it's this augmented reality app.

-Sounds interesting. -It's a bitch to get up.

It's fucking hard to explain. You wouldn't get it, but, yeah.

Chuck some music on.

-It's fucking boring as shit in here. -That's fine.

-Show us what you got. -All right.

Give us some of your tunes.

Got this microbrewery as well, me and a mate are opening up.

it's like a night club/microbrewery.

Dude, EDM! I fucking love this shit!

This is a good track. I've heard this before. Who's the artist?

This is actually my stuff.

-Yeah, this is me. -Your stuff?

Yeah, it's all me. I produce a bit, so yeah.

Producing music, cool.

Yeah, I do a fair bit of EDM production stuff, myself, yeah.

How long you been doing that?

-About five years. -Yeah, right.

Yeah, five to eight years.

Just probably-- Yeah, when it first took off.

Dude, get my phone and do a Boomerang.

Do a Boomerang of me just getting into this music.

Oh, you gotta face...

Just get a Boomerang, just, like, candidly get it.

-You good with that one? -That's actually sick.

-Cool. -Save it and chuck it on my Instagram.

-Yeah. -Just open up my Instagram, post it,

and I'll think of a caption with some hashies.

You just got a comment on that post you made this morning of you doing pushups.

-What is it? -"Oi, fat arse, do you even lift?"

Block him.

-Delete it. -Scotty199?

Yeah, I know the cunt. Fucking idiot. Delete it.

You get that. You get fucking haters.

In the seventeenth century, all of this was a forest.

It is incredible to imagine. Isn't it, Gavin?

What?

Pop them off, love. Headphones.

We're trying to immerse Gavin in Gayhurst culture and history.

We think it's slowly really sinking in that this is his future.

Fuck!

And that he's an integral part of Gayhurst's lineage.

Fuck!

Dope view.

So how much would I get for it if I sold it in the future? 80 million?

You're not gonna sell it, idiot.

Don't be extra all your life.

I'm going to be your boss anyway.

You'll never be my boss, you fat chav.

Spicy.

So, who's the cunt that built it all in the olden days?

Language!

It's just banter.

Go, Uncle Ken. I do this all the time in the driveway with my mum.

Go!

Of course, he's just a kid.

Ballsacks!

Ballsacks!

But he's not entirely sensible sometimes.

I'm just not entirely sure what to make of him.

Who's that smoking babe with the horse?

That's Ingrid.

Her family's agisting some of our land and the stables.

She's lit AF. Good rack, too.

Gavin!

That's no way for the future Earl to speak.

Mum, he's gross and I want him gone.

Oi, Horse Chick, good rack.

Remember this face.

I'm gonna slide into your DMs.

I don't know how to use any of that. You have to do it.

There's no denying Lisa Woolton would be a very big get.

Even the dog's famous.

Has she only done that show, Soweto Sunrise?

Well, she did that film recently, The Back Scratcher.

Which was a massive flop. She's a terrible actress.

I think she should stick to television.

She's not good enough for film.

What's her pet situation?

Apparently, it's behavioral problems,

but my gut tells me that it's past love issues

or puppy molestation.

I don't know. I need to meet the dog to tell for sure.

Make sure my phone's on in case she calls.

Yeah, it's right here.

Have you decided on a title for your book?

I'm going to stick with How to Make Your Cat Laugh.

It's a long title, but I just think that's the whole point of the book, so...

Get my dictaphone on and we'll start doing some chapter work.

Chapter five: Cats Love Innuendo.

Paragraph one.

"Ever try to invite laughter by tickling your cat?

Don't even bother.

Cats love wordplay and are suckers for double entendres.

You may not see a smile,

but nothing makes your cat laugh more than the word "pussy."

Try to get the word in--" Who is that?

Oh, there goes my brain flow. Who's that?

It's Lisa Woolton.

Oh, God. Put her on.

Hello, Lisa darling, great to meet you.

I'm a very, very, very big fan.

Likewise. I've got an emergency here with my dog.

What's going on with the dog?

He's chewing on his back leg. He's been doing it all morning.

-Right. -It's some sort of repetitive pattern.

All right. Okay, sweetheart, we are on our way.

Kloof Road, Clifton. Put your foot down.

Okay, sweetheart, we will see you soon. Stay on the line, though.

I'm going to talk to you through this. Everything is going to be okay.

Do not worry. Jana is coming.

Sounds a bit weird.

Can you give it some choke?

We spend all our time working on the collection.

I mean, it's a lot of work.

-I've done it with her pretty much since-- -Since your dad died.

She's got me working every day of the week.

-Pretty much every day. -Yeah.

Oh!

Rhonda! Isn't it cute?

Well, Mondays is Vinnie’s, Salvos, and Lifeline stores.

Five dollars. They want $5 for it. Highway robbery.

I'll give 'em 50 cents max for that.

And I'm not sure that I've already got that one, but that does look--

Do you know what? I think we've got a double.

It does look very familiar, doesn't it? Legong, Bali.

Yeah.

Tuesdays is Council collection.

Quite like that.

We ring Council, just to see what streets they're doing.

I like this. Keep that?

Oh, yes. Absolutely.

Watch your back.

Sometimes, even if there's no collection,

then I'll just wear my vest and I pretend that I'm from the Council.

Hi, Council collection, love.

Have you got any rubbish to throw out, anything at all?

Whatever you got. I'm from the Council.

You would not believe it, though.

They fall for it every damn time, don't they?

-It's totally... -Amazing.

Wednesdays is hump day.

Yep. It's just basically sorting, polishing.

If the collection gets dusty, it's not as valuable.

Thursdays is the tip.

This could be good. I mean, that might come up all right in the wash.

Frisbee. I know I've got a few, but you can never have enough.

And Friday, bin day.

It's-- That's my least favorite day.

-Yeah, she doesn't like bin day. -No.

Oh. Is that any good?

Yeah, toss 'er in.

But you never know what you're gonna get out of a bin.

Corncob holders. We need more of those.

Yeah, toss 'em in.

A bin can deliver sometimes.

Saturdays is garage sales.

-Oh, yeah. Joycey here loves a haggle. -I love them.

I'll give you 50 cents for that.

No. We're asking $10 for that.

-Eighty cents? -No, sorry.

Oh, you got some vintage magazine.

Yes, there's some here.

Oh, I remember her being on the telly.

Thank you for your time. We're in a bit of a rush.

-Thank you. -Thanks, bye.

That's quite good, actually. Isn't it?

Sundays is our Sabbath, that's our day off.

-We just chill out with a gin and tonic. -Yep.

We just look at our collection

and just to see what we've achieved throughout the week.

Take a load off.

So, this is the development that I'm working on.

I initially was just gonna do the one apartment,

but I just fell in love with the building.

And Mum and Dad have chipped in and bought me all six. So...

It's an Art Deco place and... I think.

And it's a huge refit, doing the whole thing.

Check it out, boys.

Yeah, so I want it to be, like, the crème de la crème of apartments.

Like the best apartment on the worst street.

As you'll note, we've done this, like, massive epic space here,

'cause we've knocked into the apartment next door, so it's--

it's fucked up the neighboring apartment, it's made it, like, three meters wide.

Actually, Luke, what are we gonna do about that?

I'm thinking of, like, a vaulted ceiling

to sort of give it some sense of space,

but it's given us this sort of big floor plan here.

Kitchen, so we added this kitchen here, right?

Benchtop, it's made of bulletproof glass,

so, like, if a bullet came in, it would fucking just ricochet off it.

Chandelier comes down from here, and it's, like, real fast.

If you want the chandelier, you press the touch pad. It's just, like...

Like, we got it down to, like, 0.3 of a second, just...

like, comes down so fast.

You know when you're chopping, you just want a low chandelier.

Oh, the fucking conversation pit--

Boys, there's gonna be this, like, hydraulic, like,

sunken lounge thing here, right?

And you sit in it and you press this button, and it lowers.

It's gonna lower into the apartment downstairs.

If you're downstairs, the ceiling'll come down.

That's something they'll have to get used to.

Oh, fuck! Luke.

Can I ask you a thing about this?

Had this idea.

Like, we do a full wall of fish tank, like, in this en suite,

so floor-to-ceiling wall, like, that yay big,

and have, like, seahorses in it, eels,

like, a medium-size shark, like, one that can actually kill people.

But, like, on a hot day,

maybe you could just jump in and just have a swim around with it.

-Can we do something like that? -Well, anything's doable,

but you know, it won't be cheap.

Well, money's no object at this stage,

'cause I want that luxury, high-end, like, buyer who just doesn't give a shit.

How much do you reckon it'll go for?

I'm thinking three to eight mil. Yeah.

-Big range, but it's good. -Yeah.

-You could do a nice job with the roof. -Yeah.

I kinda like that industrial-- like, leave the beams out, maybe.

But sort of, maybe like a gold leaf kind of thing on them.

I don't know, I can't decide.

-Yeah. -Yeah, definitely.

Then you do the finger, and then up, down.

Do it like that, and then you go around, here, up, down, that,

and that's how you end it.

You'll get it. Don't worry.

Hey, mate, do you reckon your mum was, like, a virgin before she got married?

I don't know.

I reckon she was.

Well, actually, she's pretty horny.

I don't know.

I reckon she fucked heaps of dudes.

I'm gonna be the biggest player before--

I'm already considered a player at my school.

I'm gonna fuck heaps of chicks.

Let's go this way.

Fuck's sake!

Oh, I ripped my ballsack off on the hedge.

Help me.

Oh! Fucking hell!

Oh, that should be lower.

We've been low-key lurking at the stables,

'cause we've been bored as fuck.

Wouldn't mind seeing that horse chick.

What's her name?

Ingrid.

Ingrid.

She's mint.

Wouldn't mind slipping the slug in.

Whose is this car?

Oh, that's mine, when I was five.

We found this lit mini car.

We thought we wouldn't be able to start it, but we got it going.

We're gonna use it

to shoot some content for my Cuntlord Instagram.

Yeah.

Dope as fuck.

If I start tuning Ingrid now,

then not these holidays, but next holidays,

I might have sex with her.

I can't now 'cause I've got a child-size dick,

so she probably wouldn't feel anything.

Depends how tight she is.

There's Ingrid.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Horse chick.

Hi.

Come here.

With chicks, do you, like,

ease in, or do you just go straight in, or do you even--

Do you just, like, dangle the carrot a little bit?

I go easy.

Come here if you want the D, the dick.

-Don't you want the dick? -I'm busy. Go away.

Come here if you want to go skiing with two dudes.

Here's you.

A new client of this caliber, it's make-or-break.

I need to be on my toes.

There she is.

For me as a brand, the Jana brand, I need the big names.

The stakes are very high, and I need to sort this dog out pronto.

All right, Colin.

I understand. Okay, I'll talk to your mum. Okay, Lisa.

Now, Colin has had a word to me and...

What I'm going to say is potentially

insulting for you and personal.

Colin says that he feels a strong connection to you. He loves you very much.

Yes.

The issue is not past-life related as I thought, and it's--

The trauma relates more to you.

What is it?

Colin didn't like the last film that you made, The Back Scratcher.

And he's finding it hard to tell you.

Oh.

Yes. Did you rehearse scenes around the house or--

-I did. -Yes, so he's seen it.

He's put the pieces together. Now, he knows the film flopped.

And it's made him very distressed and he fears for his future.

He's telling me that he prefers the old you.

Oh.

And he would like you to do more TV work and less film work.

Oh.

And to quote him, he says, "You're no Streep."

Oh.

Working with a high-profile dog, I need to trade very, very carefully.

Now, he's telling me that he would like a song made up for him and sung to him.

I sing to him.

No, not you, sweetheart, he would like me to sing the song.

Okay.

Oh, the chairs and the carpet And the big dog bowl

And the woof-woof-woof And the whoa-whoa-whoa...

My techniques change according to the pet's needs.

It's case-by-case.

And the tickle-tickle-tick...

And sometimes, if need be, I have to pull out the big guns.

So, I like to do nude work when the dog tells me he wants nude work.

I find that it accelerates intimacy and builds trust between me and the dog,

and telepathically I'm able to connect with the dog on a higher level.

Okay, and you can unzip me.

I'll do whatever it takes to get a breakthrough.

Whoa-whoa-whoa

And the mummies and the tummies And the tickle-tickle-tick

And the ha-ha-ha And the hee-hee-hee

-Cuckoo clock! -Yep. It's my dad's.

-Oh, now, these are lovely. -Oh, you like those?

-Orientals. -Oh, yes!

Do you have the full set?

Oh, I think you've got more out in the museum.

-There's some in the museum. There's more. -Yeah. Okay.

A man just came over, just rang the doorbell.

Gave me a fright at first 'cause I don't get a lot of visitors.

But he was a nice bloke. Antiques dealer.

Antiques man.

Collectibles.

So now...

-What do we have over here? -Teddies.

Teddies.

Now, these are exquisite.

Yeah. This is one of the most precious things in the whole collection.

No one's allowed to touch it, except me.

Not even me, but I do sometimes.

But I didn't like the look of him.

I didn't like how he kind of squinted his eyes. Like, I don't--

I don't trust a man that smiles too much.

I'll offer you $50. That's a good deal, Joyce.

That's not what I do. I don't usually sell.

Oh, you said you had some doubles.

I don't usually sell.

Yeah, I know. But, honey, think what you can do with the money, right?

All right, I guess if I've got doubles, then I--

-There you go. -All right, take them. I'll take the 50.

There's the $50, Joycey.

Nice meeting you.

But I warmed to him in the end.

Oh, just a second.

Victor Charlie Charlie. Come in, Les, come in. This is Joyce.

Victor Charlie Charlie, Les, come in.

I'm just talking to my boyfriend.

It's my boyfriend Les. Just sometimes he comes on about this time.

I just get a sixth sense when he's on.

In the end, I thought he was quite a nice bloke.

-Can I say goodbye to Snoopy? -Of course you can.

Goodbye, Snoopy. I'm gonna miss you so much!

Just remember when you're looking up into those bright stars,

that I'm looking up into the same bright stars.

Take him.

-I'll take good care of him. -I don't often say this, sweetheart,

but I really like you. You're a very nice man.

Go before I cry.

A curtsy for a true gentleman.

Goodbye.

Sorry, mate.

I'd let you have this spot, but I don't think I'll get another park.

Sorry.

There's casualties in every development,

so some of the long-term tenants have had to be evicted but...

that's just how the cookie crumbles, unfortunately.

The kind of buyer that I'm looking for wants these things done.

I mean, they're gonna want your boutiques and your cafes...

Somewhere nice to walk your dog and all that.

And they're gonna want a certain caliber of neighbor,

if you know what I'm saying.

I could watch your stuff if you want to go grab another load, so. Yep.

Hey, Quentin, look. There's a lot of changes here.

This is all going to add up. It's gonna be a lot of money.

Yeah, I put fucking 200 grand in the float fund. It's in there.

It was there when we started, but not now.

I mean, I don't want to hassle you,

but you know, I've been more than generous.

I'm putting my own hand in my own pocket now.

Dude, I'm not the Sultan of fucking Brunei.

I told you you're gonna get paid once the first one sells.

The rest are gonna get snapped up, mate.

I got a mate of mine getting an article in Better Homes and Gardens magazine.

Look, I'm just saying, you know, I can't build it for free.

You know? You need to put some money in the account. You know?

-I'm not a charity. -Oh, calm down, mate.

Seriously, I got fucking other work for you coming.

Restaurants, fucking microbreweries.

Like, if you play your cards right, I got a lot of work for ya. So just chill.

Mate, just put some money in the account.

Okay, cool.

Fuck! You all right, mate?

Chillax, dude.

Fuck's sake.

Getting hungry?

Gavin's proving to be a little bit bothersome,

and we actually had a complaint from Ingrid who uses our stables.

Okay, so you've got two cups full of this per day.

That's for the chickens, all right?

Okay? Come on, then.

We've got Henry, the bunny, and he likes this food, too.

I thought it'd be a great idea to give him some responsibilities.

We keep animals in our mini farm,

and I thought what a perfect opportunity to give him some duties.

Are you listening?

Darling, can you turn that off?

Why?

Why have you got this out? You're too big for it.

Sweetheart, take off your headphones, please.

-Why? -You can't hear me.

-Why? -'Cause you can't hear me, darling.

-Take-- -Why, though?

-Because I asked you to, love. -But why, though?

-Come on, don't be silly, love. -Why, though?

Pop out, love.

-Why, though? Why, though? -Come on, love. Good boy.

-Come on, love. Pop out, please. -Why, though?

Come on. Dylan's hopping out.

Come on, darling. Take off your headphones, sweetheart, please.

Good boy. Okay, that's going to the piggies.

Oh, gosh!

That's very stiff.

All right, boys, in you hop.

Stiff!

Hey, don't you think it would be a really good idea

if you named the piggies?

Yes, Mummy, I would love to.

And they could be your responsibility all the school holiday. Okay?

Hey, Mummy, could I please call my piggy "The D"?

If you like, love. Sure. Of course.

And you know, boys, I was thinking, you know we've got the historical society,

I've been talking to them about opening up Gayhurst for tours

and charging people--

-Come on, Dylan, get in. -Love?

Would you like to take people on the tour of the animals and explain them all?

-Would that be lovely? Yeah? -Hell, yeah. Yeah.

-Yeah. -Okay.

-Animals are my spirit animals. -Yeah?

And mine, too.

Are they? And I can trust you with that, love?

-Yeah. See ya. -Yeah? Okay.

-See ya, piggies. -Yeah.

Bye, cunts.

See ya, cunts!