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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,165 --> 00:00:10,325 [Quentin] Sick. 2 00:00:10,805 --> 00:00:12,405 This is fucking sick. 3 00:00:12,685 --> 00:00:16,005 -It looks so much bigger during the day. -Right, it does. 4 00:00:16,085 --> 00:00:17,765 Oh, so, that's where I'll be, boys. 5 00:00:17,845 --> 00:00:18,965 -I'll be there. -Fuck! 6 00:00:19,045 --> 00:00:21,405 Dude, get a boomerang of me doing some shit. 7 00:00:21,485 --> 00:00:22,805 Okay, go again. 8 00:00:23,845 --> 00:00:25,565 -[Quentin] Is that working? -Yeah, that's good, that's good. 9 00:00:25,805 --> 00:00:27,725 Sick. We'll post it. 10 00:00:27,805 --> 00:00:30,125 It's beautiful. It's actually a beautiful venue. 11 00:00:30,205 --> 00:00:31,725 -[woman] It's just a regular nightclub. -What's your name, again? 12 00:00:31,805 --> 00:00:33,445 -Imogen. -Imogen, yeah. 13 00:00:33,525 --> 00:00:36,485 I reckon little ones just, like, cascading down the stairs... 14 00:00:36,725 --> 00:00:37,885 What time do you reckon it'll be ready? 15 00:00:38,325 --> 00:00:39,845 Just do it quickly and make it safe. 16 00:00:39,925 --> 00:00:41,485 -Oh, okay. -It'll be safe as, babe. Don't worry. 17 00:00:41,565 --> 00:00:43,325 I'll be back, boys. I'm just gonna get another load. 18 00:00:43,405 --> 00:00:47,005 Hey mate, Dustin, get the big ones up on this speaker here too, 19 00:00:47,085 --> 00:00:48,285 -so it balances it out. -Oh, yeah. 20 00:00:48,605 --> 00:00:49,805 I think we're all right for posters. 21 00:00:49,885 --> 00:00:52,285 -There's plenty. -No, you never have enough posters. 22 00:00:52,365 --> 00:00:53,885 Is that actually a speaker? 23 00:00:53,965 --> 00:00:55,645 Imogen, are we over a speaker there? 24 00:00:55,765 --> 00:00:57,765 -Uh, yeah. -Well, that could actually be sick. 25 00:00:57,845 --> 00:01:00,205 'Cause when the beat's going, it'll sort of pump out. 26 00:01:00,285 --> 00:01:03,285 Such a good venue. It must be such a good job, managing it. 27 00:01:03,405 --> 00:01:05,205 -Like, do you love it, or...? -[bird squawks] 28 00:01:05,285 --> 00:01:07,165 -Yeah, it's okay. It's good. -Yeah, love it. 29 00:01:07,245 --> 00:01:08,285 Is there a tap in the green room? 30 00:01:08,365 --> 00:01:10,365 I've got to get this bird's water sorted out. 31 00:01:10,445 --> 00:01:12,205 So, I go on at 9 p.m. 32 00:01:12,285 --> 00:01:13,365 I've got a one-hour set. 33 00:01:13,445 --> 00:01:14,805 And I've done a big reach-out 34 00:01:14,885 --> 00:01:16,925 to all my real-estate database clients and stuff, 35 00:01:17,005 --> 00:01:19,605 to make sure we get a good crowd, though that shouldn't be an issue. 36 00:01:19,685 --> 00:01:21,885 'Cause you get a cut of the door, I think... 37 00:01:22,005 --> 00:01:26,245 Imogen, do I get a door cover-charge cut as well, or...? 38 00:01:26,325 --> 00:01:27,325 No. 39 00:01:27,405 --> 00:01:28,685 Just the fee. 40 00:01:29,125 --> 00:01:30,805 Yes, we're just getting a fee for that. 41 00:01:30,885 --> 00:01:32,445 Oh, Quentin, look, bro. 42 00:01:32,525 --> 00:01:34,605 Oh, dude, that's fucking dope! 43 00:01:34,685 --> 00:01:35,965 -How sick is that? -How good does that look? 44 00:01:36,045 --> 00:01:37,525 Dude, I'm gonna... 45 00:01:37,605 --> 00:01:39,965 Oh, my God. I can't believe I'm gonna be fucking up here tonight, 46 00:01:40,045 --> 00:01:41,085 doing my fucking... 47 00:01:41,165 --> 00:01:42,325 [moaning] 48 00:01:42,405 --> 00:01:43,685 -That fucking... Yes. -Yeah, that's it. 49 00:01:43,765 --> 00:01:45,725 Yeah! Fucking fuck, yeah! 50 00:01:45,805 --> 00:01:49,445 These are the DJ Qunt food throw-outs I'm gonna be chucking out during the set. 51 00:01:49,525 --> 00:01:52,445 So, we've got the pavlova, meat pies... 52 00:01:52,925 --> 00:01:54,165 I'm gonna peg those out. 53 00:01:54,245 --> 00:01:55,765 -We're gonna heat those up before. -Yeah. 54 00:01:55,845 --> 00:01:57,125 Tim Tams. 55 00:01:57,205 --> 00:01:59,005 The smaller food, just peg that out, 56 00:01:59,085 --> 00:02:01,245 like, down to the people, sort of at the bottom. 57 00:02:01,325 --> 00:02:02,725 We've got the boat, too. 58 00:02:02,805 --> 00:02:04,965 That's just to do some crowd-boat shit. 59 00:02:05,045 --> 00:02:07,285 Like, at that point when the crowd's, like, full-pumping, 60 00:02:07,365 --> 00:02:08,525 I'll just leap out in the boat. 61 00:02:08,605 --> 00:02:10,005 We gotta practice that, actually, boys. 62 00:02:10,085 --> 00:02:12,205 Oh, pyros. We got pyros going in. 63 00:02:12,285 --> 00:02:15,445 There's gonna be, like, a glitter cannon, um, confetti. 64 00:02:15,525 --> 00:02:16,925 Flames. These flames... 65 00:02:17,005 --> 00:02:19,165 So, this is like the big finale at the end, right? 66 00:02:19,405 --> 00:02:22,445 So, like, I'm gonna build the crowd up, drop the bass. 67 00:02:22,525 --> 00:02:24,405 I'm gonna fucking do that, so... boom. 68 00:02:24,485 --> 00:02:28,525 I'm gonna have the fucking crowd, like, putty in my hands at that point. 69 00:02:28,605 --> 00:02:31,405 So, I'll just get a feel during the show when to, like, pull this out, 70 00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:32,365 and just give it a, like... 71 00:02:32,925 --> 00:02:34,245 -Whoa. -It'll go straight into the audience... 72 00:02:35,805 --> 00:02:37,885 Actually, I was gonna say, do you have a VIP section? 73 00:02:37,965 --> 00:02:39,645 -Like an area... -No VIP, no. 74 00:02:39,725 --> 00:02:40,605 Like a booth or something? 75 00:02:40,685 --> 00:02:43,165 'Cause I want to come out afterwards, I don't want to get hassled by fans. 76 00:02:43,485 --> 00:02:46,565 So, could you... maybe I could get you to maybe rope off, like, a bit here? 77 00:02:47,045 --> 00:02:48,725 Just whack up a sign, "VIP." 78 00:02:49,085 --> 00:02:51,685 We can rope up a little section. We'll organize something for you, yeah. 79 00:02:51,765 --> 00:02:52,605 Thanks. 80 00:02:52,685 --> 00:02:54,605 You gonna hang out after, or... 81 00:02:54,685 --> 00:02:56,005 Dude, get the mic, get the mic going! 82 00:02:56,085 --> 00:02:57,565 Like, put it in front of my mouth. 83 00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:58,525 Yeah. 84 00:02:58,605 --> 00:03:00,085 Dude, this is fucking sick. 85 00:03:00,165 --> 00:03:03,365 ♪ Yeah, DJ Qunt! ♪ 86 00:03:03,445 --> 00:03:05,285 ♪ DJ Qunt! ♪ 87 00:03:05,365 --> 00:03:08,805 ♪ DJ Qunt! ♪ 88 00:03:08,885 --> 00:03:10,325 How does it sound, Imogen? 89 00:03:10,525 --> 00:03:11,605 How good do I sound? 90 00:03:11,925 --> 00:03:15,365 [singing indistinctly] 91 00:03:16,405 --> 00:03:18,325 Is that bird gonna fly anywhere? 'Cause I can't allow that. 92 00:03:18,405 --> 00:03:20,285 No, no, he never leaves my shoulder. 93 00:03:20,365 --> 00:03:21,405 He's fully trained. 94 00:03:21,485 --> 00:03:24,165 Is there a green room for us to chill before the show? 95 00:03:24,245 --> 00:03:27,045 'Cause I don't want anyone seeing me when I start coming out. 96 00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:28,365 Okay, right. Yeah, I'll show you. 97 00:03:28,685 --> 00:03:30,885 Are you gonna chill at all with us before the show? 98 00:03:30,965 --> 00:03:32,245 [Imogen] Uh, no. No. 99 00:03:32,925 --> 00:03:34,805 [Quentin] You can if you want, like... 100 00:03:36,445 --> 00:03:40,765 [theme music playing] 101 00:03:51,205 --> 00:03:53,205 [off-key cello music] 102 00:04:00,445 --> 00:04:02,965 [Becky] I can't get used to not seeing Lucy. 103 00:04:03,325 --> 00:04:06,045 It's been a week, and it's the longest we've been apart 104 00:04:06,125 --> 00:04:08,005 in our whole lives. 105 00:04:08,085 --> 00:04:11,165 She's moved into another residence hall with her friends. 106 00:04:11,485 --> 00:04:13,245 And she took all her things. 107 00:04:13,605 --> 00:04:16,005 She won't even reply to my texts. 108 00:04:16,085 --> 00:04:17,845 She must be really, really mad at me. 109 00:04:19,325 --> 00:04:21,045 This is Lucy's pillow.� 110 00:04:21,165 --> 00:04:23,285 If you sniff really hard, you can smell her. 111 00:04:23,645 --> 00:04:25,645 So, when I miss her, I sniff it heaps. 112 00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:28,365 [sniffs] 113 00:04:31,285 --> 00:04:34,325 [Becky] Everything just seems really bad without my sister. 114 00:04:36,205 --> 00:04:38,765 Like, I just can't even be bothered vlogging. 115 00:04:39,245 --> 00:04:42,885 Like, my subby numbers are really high, and everyone's still loving me. 116 00:04:42,965 --> 00:04:46,045 And I just got asked to do this craft convention thing this morning, 117 00:04:46,125 --> 00:04:50,605 but... I'm just... I can't be bothered with anything these days. 118 00:04:51,325 --> 00:04:53,445 All right, we'll set you up there. 119 00:04:53,845 --> 00:04:57,605 [Becky] So, I was thinking that I really need to set the record straight 120 00:04:57,685 --> 00:04:58,965 with my fans. 121 00:04:59,445 --> 00:05:02,685 Lucy was right when she said that everything about me is fake. 122 00:05:02,765 --> 00:05:05,245 And then you know how to zoom in, obviously. 123 00:05:05,325 --> 00:05:06,725 [Becky] Nancy's gonna help me. 124 00:05:06,805 --> 00:05:10,005 Nothing happened with her and Lingers, by the way, so I've forgiven her. 125 00:05:10,485 --> 00:05:14,205 I've decided that I'm going to be honest with my fans, 126 00:05:14,285 --> 00:05:16,765 and tell them who I really am. 127 00:05:17,885 --> 00:05:19,285 Hey, Beckinators. 128 00:05:20,125 --> 00:05:23,565 Today's video is going to come as a major shock to a lot of you. 129 00:05:25,005 --> 00:05:27,325 It is with a heavy heart that I inform you 130 00:05:27,405 --> 00:05:30,525 that I have not been 100% honest with you guys. 131 00:05:32,285 --> 00:05:34,085 Through careful camera angles, 132 00:05:34,165 --> 00:05:38,325 I've been able to conceal the truth about who I really am. 133 00:05:39,325 --> 00:05:40,725 I am, in fact, 134 00:05:41,005 --> 00:05:44,285 a seven-foot-three girl with really wide legs. 135 00:05:46,925 --> 00:05:49,005 Nancy, if could get you to jump in, please? 136 00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:53,285 This is a normal-sized girl. 137 00:05:57,285 --> 00:05:59,565 God decided to make me tall. 138 00:06:00,005 --> 00:06:01,485 And it's been really hard. 139 00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:04,125 I'm not making excuses, I'm just... 140 00:06:05,685 --> 00:06:07,205 I'm a freak of nature. 141 00:06:08,365 --> 00:06:10,525 And I wish I could change it, but I can't. 142 00:06:12,685 --> 00:06:14,005 This is who I am. 143 00:06:15,805 --> 00:06:17,005 This is me. 144 00:06:22,445 --> 00:06:23,405 Cut. 145 00:06:33,285 --> 00:06:35,645 Okay, so we need more at the back. 146 00:06:35,765 --> 00:06:39,245 [Keith] Well, today's the big day. It's the debut of my fashion line. 147 00:06:39,325 --> 00:06:41,205 The "Keith by Keith Dick" collection 148 00:06:41,285 --> 00:06:44,085 will be onstage in a fashion parade tonight. 149 00:06:44,525 --> 00:06:47,645 We have 11 across the back, and 10 across the front. 150 00:06:48,285 --> 00:06:49,605 [Keith] We're expecting a big turnout. 151 00:06:49,685 --> 00:06:51,765 We've got some locals coming. 152 00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:54,045 Some young people. A lot of young people coming. 153 00:06:54,445 --> 00:06:57,685 Some fashion-industry rep friends of mine coming, too, hopefully. 154 00:06:57,765 --> 00:06:59,845 -Free fashion parade. -No, thank you. 155 00:07:00,925 --> 00:07:02,045 'Cause it's a jacket. 156 00:07:02,125 --> 00:07:04,085 [Keith] The new cash register system has arrived, 157 00:07:04,165 --> 00:07:06,245 and it's a very sleek, modern machine. 158 00:07:06,325 --> 00:07:08,685 Everyone's getting really excited, getting to know it. 159 00:07:09,205 --> 00:07:11,685 It's been a big investment for us, money-wise. 160 00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,325 [Marilyn] And now print the receipt. 161 00:07:13,805 --> 00:07:14,805 -There we are. Okay. -Yeah. 162 00:07:15,125 --> 00:07:18,085 We'll get the autumnals up, right next to the whites. 163 00:07:18,165 --> 00:07:20,405 Maybe shift those pencil skirts out of the way. 164 00:07:21,205 --> 00:07:22,805 It's looking good, isn't it, sweetie? 165 00:07:23,845 --> 00:07:25,445 Right, give me one of these, mate. 166 00:07:25,885 --> 00:07:27,565 There we go. All right. 167 00:07:27,645 --> 00:07:29,165 We are well behind schedule. 168 00:07:29,245 --> 00:07:30,925 So, we're working like crazy back here 169 00:07:31,005 --> 00:07:32,885 to get everything ready for the show tonight. 170 00:07:33,005 --> 00:07:35,525 -How you going, Alan? Just got the... -All under control. 171 00:07:35,605 --> 00:07:37,405 Get that straight on the seam, there, mate. 172 00:07:37,485 --> 00:07:39,605 And I'll get you to run that through on the overlooker, after. 173 00:07:39,725 --> 00:07:43,365 Who's doing the Swarovski crystals around the neckline of those singlets? 174 00:07:43,445 --> 00:07:45,685 I need the hot-glue gun for that. I don't know where it is.� 175 00:07:45,765 --> 00:07:46,805 One of youse got it. 176 00:07:46,885 --> 00:07:48,045 Yeah, that looks good. 177 00:07:48,125 --> 00:07:49,085 Oh, great! 178 00:07:49,165 --> 00:07:52,045 I've recruited these ladies, here, from the cake shop up the road. 179 00:07:52,125 --> 00:07:54,485 They're helping out with the sewing. They're very fast. 180 00:07:54,565 --> 00:07:56,245 It really speeds up the process. 181 00:07:56,765 --> 00:07:57,605 Check it out.� 182 00:07:57,685 --> 00:08:00,005 We've got to get a lot of stock on the shelves for tonight, 183 00:08:00,085 --> 00:08:01,165 so we're working like crazy. 184 00:08:01,245 --> 00:08:02,725 It's go, go, go. 185 00:08:02,885 --> 00:08:06,605 [Keith] This whole thing's been a dream come true. A boyhood dream. 186 00:08:06,845 --> 00:08:10,085 The Dick name is on the door, and now the Dick name is on the label. 187 00:08:10,165 --> 00:08:11,485 Does it get any better? 188 00:08:11,565 --> 00:08:14,365 Jed, please, walk it down, as if you're on the catwalk. 189 00:08:14,445 --> 00:08:15,485 Make it good. 190 00:08:15,885 --> 00:08:17,285 Okay, stop and spin. 191 00:08:17,365 --> 00:08:18,605 This is not working for me. 192 00:08:18,685 --> 00:08:21,445 What I want is more of a Grecian collar. 193 00:08:21,525 --> 00:08:22,965 I want a lot more play. 194 00:08:23,045 --> 00:08:24,845 A baggier feel in the pant, here. 195 00:08:24,925 --> 00:08:27,205 I would like that, when it unzips, 196 00:08:27,285 --> 00:08:29,925 I would like that to reveal fluorescent orange. 197 00:08:30,005 --> 00:08:34,125 I want a flouncier, sort of, peplum kind of thing happening here. 198 00:08:34,205 --> 00:08:36,245 I do like the fairy boot. That's quite good. 199 00:08:36,325 --> 00:08:38,285 All right. And walk them back, please. 200 00:08:38,405 --> 00:08:39,245 [Keith] Great. 201 00:08:39,605 --> 00:08:41,205 Um... So, you got all that down? 202 00:08:41,285 --> 00:08:42,365 Okay. 203 00:08:42,685 --> 00:08:43,725 June! 204 00:08:44,205 --> 00:08:45,245 June! 205 00:08:45,325 --> 00:08:46,285 Come here! 206 00:08:47,525 --> 00:08:50,365 Get this stock price-labeled and wrapped, ASAP! 207 00:08:51,205 --> 00:08:53,645 [Keith] We need to shift the units big-time tonight. 208 00:08:53,725 --> 00:08:55,765 I'm expecting a lot of stock to fly off the shelves. 209 00:08:56,365 --> 00:08:58,845 This is really our last chance to save the store. 210 00:08:59,605 --> 00:09:00,805 Am I confident? 211 00:09:00,885 --> 00:09:01,725 Yes. 212 00:09:02,045 --> 00:09:03,445 Am I nervous? 213 00:09:03,925 --> 00:09:05,325 Shitting my dacks. 214 00:09:05,645 --> 00:09:07,325 -Free fashion parade tonight. -No, thanks. 215 00:09:22,525 --> 00:09:24,685 [Jana] We have made our way to Zimbabwe 216 00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:27,085 for me to make contact with Natasha, my aardvark. 217 00:09:27,485 --> 00:09:29,085 Look at those birds over there. 218 00:09:29,165 --> 00:09:31,885 Kylie's canceled her wedding to be here, too, 219 00:09:31,965 --> 00:09:33,125 which is very nice of her. 220 00:09:33,525 --> 00:09:37,285 We're both very excited and I think Kylie's glad that she came. 221 00:09:37,565 --> 00:09:38,405 Yes? 222 00:09:39,445 --> 00:09:41,045 Isn't it wonderful? 223 00:09:41,125 --> 00:09:43,245 [Jana] This land is where I feel most at home. 224 00:09:43,325 --> 00:09:45,605 It's my childhood, it's my homeland. 225 00:09:46,045 --> 00:09:48,605 It's very nice for Kylie to see it up close. 226 00:09:48,685 --> 00:09:50,485 Because it's your first time here, isn't it, darling? 227 00:09:50,565 --> 00:09:52,325 -Mm-hmm. -First time you've been to Zimbabwe. 228 00:09:52,405 --> 00:09:53,925 Darling, come here. Come here. 229 00:09:54,325 --> 00:09:55,725 Come and sit next to Mommy. 230 00:09:56,085 --> 00:09:58,285 [Jana] Okay, further into the scrub, boys. 231 00:09:58,565 --> 00:10:00,925 This is the feeding area for the aardvarks. 232 00:10:01,685 --> 00:10:04,005 Look, Kylie, aardvark droppings, right there. 233 00:10:04,165 --> 00:10:05,525 That's an aardvark dropping. 234 00:10:05,645 --> 00:10:07,285 So, we know we're in the right spot. 235 00:10:07,365 --> 00:10:08,605 Further in, boys. 236 00:10:09,325 --> 00:10:11,245 And place it there. Place it there. 237 00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:14,325 [Jana] Kylie and I will spend most of the day in the box, 238 00:10:14,405 --> 00:10:17,205 waiting for Natasha, trying to call out to her. 239 00:10:17,285 --> 00:10:19,885 I think once she hears my voice,� she'll come. 240 00:10:20,125 --> 00:10:22,085 And then it's just a matter of trapping her. 241 00:10:22,405 --> 00:10:24,885 Inside the box, we're safe from rhino attacks, 242 00:10:24,965 --> 00:10:27,205 tigers, vultures, you name it. 243 00:10:27,285 --> 00:10:29,245 It's very safe inside the box, Kylie. 244 00:10:29,365 --> 00:10:30,805 [dog whines] 245 00:10:32,005 --> 00:10:33,525 Yes, I see. 246 00:10:34,285 --> 00:10:35,325 Okay. 247 00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:38,005 Right, he's telling me that he's scared of hyenas. 248 00:10:38,085 --> 00:10:40,085 He thinks a hyena is going to eat him. 249 00:10:40,445 --> 00:10:42,885 So, I'll get you to take him back to base camp for me. 250 00:10:42,965 --> 00:10:45,765 I'll text you when we see the aardvark, and you can come down with the nets. 251 00:10:45,845 --> 00:10:47,325 Okay, thank you, boys. 252 00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:49,885 Kylie, let's go in before the rhinos come. 253 00:10:55,965 --> 00:10:57,405 Shut that door fast. 254 00:11:01,445 --> 00:11:02,765 [Jana] Natasha! 255 00:11:03,445 --> 00:11:04,885 Natasha! 256 00:11:06,085 --> 00:11:07,525 Natasha! 257 00:11:12,325 --> 00:11:13,725 Natasha! 258 00:11:13,805 --> 00:11:16,005 Natasha, I'm here! 259 00:11:16,245 --> 00:11:17,885 Mommy's come for you. 260 00:11:18,565 --> 00:11:19,805 Natasha! 261 00:11:20,605 --> 00:11:22,925 -Call with me, Kylie. -You're calling her. 262 00:11:23,445 --> 00:11:26,085 Why are you in such a bad mood today? 263 00:11:26,605 --> 00:11:27,445 [Kylie scoffs] 264 00:11:27,525 --> 00:11:29,485 It's my wedding day, Jana. 265 00:11:29,565 --> 00:11:32,205 And my future husband is by himself, at home. 266 00:11:32,285 --> 00:11:35,085 And I'm sitting in a plastic box in Zimbabwe. 267 00:11:36,485 --> 00:11:40,165 Come on, Kylie. You're repeating yourself now. 268 00:11:40,245 --> 00:11:42,805 Help me. Natasha! 269 00:11:42,885 --> 00:11:45,285 Natasha! Natasha! 270 00:11:45,365 --> 00:11:47,525 Mommy's here. Where are you? 271 00:11:47,605 --> 00:11:49,605 [dance music blaring] 272 00:12:02,085 --> 00:12:03,925 Stick around for DJ Qwunt. 273 00:12:04,005 --> 00:12:05,565 -Fuck yes! Fuck! -Whoo! 274 00:12:05,645 --> 00:12:07,845 It's "DJ Qunt." It's "Qunt," dude. 275 00:12:07,925 --> 00:12:09,845 [Quentin] It's not "Qwunt," for fuck sake. 276 00:12:09,925 --> 00:12:11,445 Fuck! DJ Qunt! 277 00:12:12,005 --> 00:12:14,005 [making animal noises] 278 00:12:15,245 --> 00:12:18,005 ♪ I'm lit as fuck ♪ 279 00:12:18,285 --> 00:12:22,325 ♪ Through the working week they say ♪ 280 00:12:22,765 --> 00:12:25,845 ♪ But you should see me ♪ 281 00:12:25,925 --> 00:12:30,205 ♪ On Saturday ♪ 282 00:12:30,685 --> 00:12:32,165 Fuck, here he comes, cunt. 283 00:12:33,605 --> 00:12:37,285 ♪ Saturday ♪ 284 00:12:37,885 --> 00:12:40,005 Fuck, boy! That was the fucking finale! 285 00:12:40,525 --> 00:12:42,165 This guy is fucking too early. 286 00:12:42,365 --> 00:12:44,085 -It's too early! -Go, go, go! 287 00:12:44,165 --> 00:12:45,485 Fuck this! 288 00:12:46,045 --> 00:12:48,485 Get your fucking shit together, cunt. It's your fucking job. 289 00:12:48,725 --> 00:12:49,565 Fuck! 290 00:12:50,125 --> 00:12:51,005 [bird squawks] 291 00:12:51,085 --> 00:12:52,645 Oh, fuck. Fuck! 292 00:12:54,125 --> 00:12:55,765 [in auto-tuned voice] Someone please get the cockatoo. 293 00:12:55,845 --> 00:12:57,005 Get the bird! Get the bird! 294 00:12:57,085 --> 00:12:58,205 Get the fucking cockatoo, cunt! 295 00:12:58,925 --> 00:13:00,245 Come down here! 296 00:13:00,325 --> 00:13:03,325 ♪ But I just wanna party ♪ 297 00:13:05,605 --> 00:13:06,965 Fuck! It's right there, bro. 298 00:13:19,045 --> 00:13:21,925 ♪ I don't know what I'm doing ♪ 299 00:13:23,005 --> 00:13:25,245 [Becky] Today, I've hit an all-time low. 300 00:13:26,605 --> 00:13:28,765 Since my confession video, 301 00:13:28,845 --> 00:13:31,405 my subscriber numbers have dropped like crazy. 302 00:13:32,045 --> 00:13:34,525 Everyone's done following me on my socials. 303 00:13:34,965 --> 00:13:38,285 I think people don't like me anymore because I lied to them. 304 00:13:39,205 --> 00:13:41,885 Or maybe they don't like me because I'm a tall freak. 305 00:13:43,045 --> 00:13:44,325 Which would be worse. 306 00:13:44,685 --> 00:13:47,205 [Becky] My college work has been suffering, too. 307 00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:48,925 I'm sorry, I'm just... 308 00:13:49,325 --> 00:13:50,485 [speaking Chinese] 309 00:13:51,365 --> 00:13:53,125 Lingers! Hi! 310 00:13:54,045 --> 00:13:57,405 [Becky] I saw Lingers today, and he really didn't want to talk to me. 311 00:13:59,445 --> 00:14:01,165 [girl] There's, like, a breed of cat that doesn't have tails. 312 00:14:01,245 --> 00:14:04,845 Do you guys feel like doing a silent disco in my room again tonight or...? 313 00:14:04,925 --> 00:14:05,965 No. 314 00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:07,285 No. 315 00:14:07,445 --> 00:14:10,445 Even my actual friends are being weird around me. 316 00:14:10,845 --> 00:14:12,005 See you, guys. 317 00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:23,245 [Becky] I decided to try out for the women's basketball team 318 00:14:23,325 --> 00:14:25,685 to try and make more friends my size. 319 00:14:26,765 --> 00:14:28,685 But, I didn't get in. 320 00:14:30,365 --> 00:14:31,965 I wouldn't say I'm lonely. 321 00:14:32,045 --> 00:14:36,005 But I could definitely do with some more social interaction lately. 322 00:14:36,565 --> 00:14:39,765 I've even started hanging out in the shower stalls 323 00:14:39,845 --> 00:14:41,125 without the water on, 324 00:14:41,205 --> 00:14:42,325 just to kill time. 325 00:14:43,805 --> 00:14:45,405 So, I spoke to Student Services. 326 00:14:45,605 --> 00:14:48,885 They said it won't be until third semester before we can find you a new roommate. 327 00:14:49,205 --> 00:14:50,605 I would enjoy the peace and quiet. 328 00:14:51,325 --> 00:14:54,005 I've been thinking about transferring colleges. 329 00:14:54,445 --> 00:14:55,405 Is that weird? 330 00:14:56,045 --> 00:14:58,245 Listen, a lot of kids go through ups and downs. 331 00:14:58,325 --> 00:14:59,845 It's just a part of college life. 332 00:15:00,325 --> 00:15:02,325 You're not the first freshman to want to transfer. 333 00:15:05,285 --> 00:15:06,205 Thanks. 334 00:15:06,605 --> 00:15:07,605 No problem. 335 00:15:10,445 --> 00:15:13,645 [Becky] It's like I can't even be bothered with anything anymore. 336 00:15:15,765 --> 00:15:17,245 Like, I know this is weird,� 337 00:15:17,325 --> 00:15:20,125 but I feel like I don't even deserve food. 338 00:15:23,085 --> 00:15:26,885 Freshman life is not what I thought it was going to be. 339 00:15:27,965 --> 00:15:28,885 [snifing] 340 00:15:31,285 --> 00:15:32,365 [Keith on loud speaker] Elegant. 341 00:15:33,645 --> 00:15:34,725 Whimsical. 342 00:15:35,925 --> 00:15:37,445 Lit as fuck. 343 00:15:38,645 --> 00:15:40,485 Copy. Orange. 344 00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:42,485 You are who you want to be. 345 00:15:44,085 --> 00:15:46,165 Keith Dick. Outrageous. 346 00:15:46,885 --> 00:15:49,325 Keith Dick, on fleek. 347 00:15:57,405 --> 00:15:59,765 Wait, wait, wait. Oh, Jesus Christ. 348 00:15:59,845 --> 00:16:02,005 Oh, shit, shit, shit. 349 00:16:02,085 --> 00:16:04,005 Bloody hell. Oh, shit. 350 00:16:10,685 --> 00:16:12,445 How you going, Alan. Hurry up. Hurry up, please. 351 00:16:12,965 --> 00:16:14,365 Quickly. Have you done it? 352 00:16:15,845 --> 00:16:17,845 [electronic music playing] 353 00:16:19,165 --> 00:16:20,125 Go. 354 00:16:20,965 --> 00:16:22,325 Hurry up, mate. Hurry up. 355 00:16:30,325 --> 00:16:31,765 Get your hat off. Take your hat off. 356 00:16:33,965 --> 00:16:35,805 Luke, go, go, go! Go, go, go! 357 00:16:38,405 --> 00:16:40,405 [music continues] 358 00:16:46,085 --> 00:16:48,725 Wait, wait, wait. Don't fucking go. 359 00:16:49,725 --> 00:16:50,565 And go! 360 00:17:00,485 --> 00:17:02,565 [crowd whistles] 361 00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:07,525 [applause] 362 00:17:21,165 --> 00:17:22,685 I love you. 363 00:17:26,365 --> 00:17:27,645 [Jana] Natasha! 364 00:17:28,365 --> 00:17:29,605 Natasha! 365 00:17:30,165 --> 00:17:32,365 Natasha! Can you hear me? 366 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:35,165 Darling, it's Jana. I'm back. 367 00:17:35,845 --> 00:17:36,925 Natasha! 368 00:17:37,005 --> 00:17:39,485 Jana, maybe try not to yell. 369 00:17:39,565 --> 00:17:40,965 Maybe you're scaring her off. 370 00:17:41,045 --> 00:17:42,245 Mm, yes. 371 00:17:42,325 --> 00:17:44,405 I just can't wait to see her. 372 00:17:45,085 --> 00:17:48,485 This is the feeding ground, here, so I guess it's only a matter of time. 373 00:17:48,685 --> 00:17:50,805 [Kylie] I'm so warm, and my legs are killing me. 374 00:17:50,885 --> 00:17:52,445 Can I please get out and stretch? 375 00:17:52,525 --> 00:17:53,845 -[Jana] Yes. -Can we stop? 376 00:17:53,925 --> 00:17:55,725 Yes, I suppose. We've been in here for three hours. 377 00:17:55,805 --> 00:17:57,125 -Oh, thank God. -So, let's have a break. 378 00:17:57,205 --> 00:17:58,645 Let's stretch the legs. 379 00:18:00,125 --> 00:18:03,805 We should be safe to go back to base camp at this time of day. 380 00:18:04,085 --> 00:18:05,405 Is that where everybody else is? 381 00:18:05,685 --> 00:18:07,405 Yes, everyone's back at base camp. 382 00:18:07,605 --> 00:18:09,205 -Oh, my God. -Yes. 383 00:18:09,285 --> 00:18:12,085 There's something at base camp I'd like to show you, actually. 384 00:18:12,285 --> 00:18:13,325 What is it? 385 00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:15,605 -Well, you'll see when you get there. -What is it, though? 386 00:18:15,925 --> 00:18:16,805 Well... 387 00:18:17,325 --> 00:18:18,925 I think you're going to like it. 388 00:18:19,645 --> 00:18:20,525 [Kylie laughs] 389 00:18:21,485 --> 00:18:23,525 [Jana] Lions don't feed at this time of day, 390 00:18:23,605 --> 00:18:24,805 so we should be all right. 391 00:18:26,245 --> 00:18:27,325 [distant chatter] 392 00:18:33,685 --> 00:18:34,565 Hello. 393 00:18:34,645 --> 00:18:36,365 [child chatter indistinctly] 394 00:18:36,685 --> 00:18:39,165 Hello, my sweethearts. How are you? 395 00:18:40,565 --> 00:18:42,485 [women singing in foreign language] 396 00:19:02,285 --> 00:19:04,285 [singing continues] 397 00:19:15,165 --> 00:19:16,125 [singing stops] 398 00:19:17,005 --> 00:19:18,445 What's going on here, Jana? 399 00:19:19,405 --> 00:19:20,645 It's for us. 400 00:19:20,925 --> 00:19:22,525 I built you a treehouse. 401 00:19:23,005 --> 00:19:24,765 It's the one that you always wanted. 402 00:19:25,245 --> 00:19:28,925 I've been planning this for a long time and these people built it for us... 403 00:19:29,605 --> 00:19:31,285 to start our new chapter together. 404 00:19:31,725 --> 00:19:34,325 It's for you and I to live in, because... 405 00:19:35,005 --> 00:19:36,725 it might be obvious, but... 406 00:19:37,325 --> 00:19:38,565 I love you. 407 00:19:38,805 --> 00:19:40,325 And I can't live without you. 408 00:19:40,765 --> 00:19:41,885 Living in this treehouse, 409 00:19:41,965 --> 00:19:43,845 we don't have to deal with the rest of the world. 410 00:19:43,925 --> 00:19:45,525 We can leave all that behind. 411 00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:47,725 It'll just be you and me. 412 00:19:48,445 --> 00:19:50,485 And Victor, and Natasha the aardvark. 413 00:19:50,845 --> 00:19:52,965 And we could have a family together. 414 00:19:53,045 --> 00:19:55,445 I can have my baby. You can have a baby, too, if you like. 415 00:19:56,005 --> 00:19:56,845 Jana... 416 00:19:57,725 --> 00:19:59,205 [Jana] Just the two of us. 417 00:20:00,645 --> 00:20:02,325 I don't know what you want me to say. 418 00:20:04,205 --> 00:20:05,165 Just... 419 00:20:05,445 --> 00:20:07,325 say that you'll live here with me. 420 00:20:07,885 --> 00:20:09,365 Say that you love me. 421 00:20:11,165 --> 00:20:12,325 Yes? 422 00:20:19,485 --> 00:20:22,165 ♪ Oi Oi Oi ♪ 423 00:20:23,205 --> 00:20:24,485 ♪ Crikey ♪ 424 00:20:27,045 --> 00:20:30,605 ♪ Oi Oi Oi ♪ 425 00:20:31,285 --> 00:20:32,765 [dance music continues] 426 00:20:49,485 --> 00:20:51,765 ♪ Aussie Aussie Aussie ♪ 427 00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:58,925 ♪ Oi Oi Oi ♪ 428 00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,845 -That dude just told me I have a fat ass. -What? 429 00:21:06,245 --> 00:21:09,565 This dude, here, just wrote on his phone "You have a fat ass"! 430 00:21:09,645 --> 00:21:11,805 -Who fucking cares? -Well, I fucking care! 431 00:21:11,885 --> 00:21:13,525 Now I can't fucking focus on anything. 432 00:21:13,605 --> 00:21:15,485 Forget that! You're not even fucking DJ-ing! 433 00:21:15,565 --> 00:21:16,805 I'm fucking DJ-ing! Fucking shut up! 434 00:21:16,885 --> 00:21:18,525 [Quentin] Do you think I've got a fat ass? 435 00:21:18,605 --> 00:21:19,925 No, just fucking DJ! 436 00:21:20,005 --> 00:21:23,005 When you met me, did you think I was a dude with a fat ass? 437 00:21:23,085 --> 00:21:24,845 -You're losing this crowd. -Well, it's fucked me up, dude. 438 00:21:24,925 --> 00:21:26,125 Fucking, you're losing them! 439 00:21:26,205 --> 00:21:27,805 -[Harrison] Pay attention! -[Quentin] All right! 440 00:21:31,005 --> 00:21:33,045 [in auto-tuned voice] Who's ready to party? 441 00:21:35,645 --> 00:21:37,485 Crikey, who wants to get fed? 442 00:21:44,765 --> 00:21:45,605 Whoo! 443 00:21:45,685 --> 00:21:47,645 Crikey, who wants a lamington? 444 00:21:54,725 --> 00:21:56,805 Who wants a pavlova? 445 00:22:08,005 --> 00:22:10,845 All right, who's gonna get me the boat? I'm coming out in the boat, everyone! 446 00:22:12,325 --> 00:22:14,845 The fucking smoke gun. Dude, I need the smoke gun. 447 00:22:14,925 --> 00:22:16,805 Give me the smoke gun. Where is it? 448 00:22:21,045 --> 00:22:21,965 -[Harrison] Dude! Dude! Dude! -[music stops] 449 00:22:22,045 --> 00:22:23,485 [Quentin] Sorry! Sorry!� 450 00:22:23,925 --> 00:22:25,605 -[Quentin] Dude, sorry. -[Harrison] Fuck! 451 00:22:25,685 --> 00:22:27,005 [Quentin] Fuck, fuck, fuck. Is it working? 452 00:22:27,085 --> 00:22:28,565 No, fucking look at it! 453 00:22:28,645 --> 00:22:30,725 -Get the fucking thing working. -Look at the fucking screen! 454 00:22:30,805 --> 00:22:31,925 For fuck's sake. Fuck. 455 00:22:32,005 --> 00:22:33,765 Just go. Come on, guys. Just go, please. 456 00:22:33,845 --> 00:22:35,245 It's done. It's finished. 457 00:22:35,325 --> 00:22:36,525 [crowd murmurs] 458 00:22:39,485 --> 00:22:41,485 [dance music plays] 459 00:22:45,845 --> 00:22:46,885 [Imogen] Go! 460 00:22:49,085 --> 00:22:50,005 Fuck. 461 00:22:51,685 --> 00:22:52,685 Fuck. 462 00:22:53,125 --> 00:22:54,285 Let's get the fuck out of here. 463 00:23:00,485 --> 00:23:01,765 [indistinct chatter] 464 00:23:02,125 --> 00:23:06,725 My confession video is getting all these really mean comments from haters. 465 00:23:06,805 --> 00:23:07,925 It's really bad. 466 00:23:08,245 --> 00:23:09,565 "You're a fraud." 467 00:23:09,885 --> 00:23:11,045 "Bye, bitch." 468 00:23:11,605 --> 00:23:13,925 "Hey, freaky-legs. Your crafts sucked." 469 00:23:14,365 --> 00:23:16,805 I'm trying to delete them, but they just keep popping up. 470 00:23:17,805 --> 00:23:19,365 "Liar. Unfollow." 471 00:23:20,045 --> 00:23:21,365 "Are you disabled?" 472 00:23:22,085 --> 00:23:23,245 It's really bad. 473 00:23:23,885 --> 00:23:25,765 And these memes, too.� 474 00:23:26,165 --> 00:23:28,365 They're going viral, all over the internet. 475 00:23:29,525 --> 00:23:31,645 People are screenshotting them and sending them to me. 476 00:23:32,245 --> 00:23:33,765 My mom sent me that one. 477 00:23:35,725 --> 00:23:38,805 [Becky] Basically, my only friend now is our RA, Aaron. 478 00:23:39,925 --> 00:23:40,765 Hey, Becky. 479 00:23:40,845 --> 00:23:44,445 He's really nice, but it's kind of lame to be friends with your RA. 480 00:23:44,725 --> 00:23:46,525 If your friends can't accept you for who you are, 481 00:23:46,605 --> 00:23:48,125 then they're not worth having. 482 00:23:49,205 --> 00:23:51,805 But my subscriber numbers were getting really high. 483 00:23:51,885 --> 00:23:53,085 And now they're terrible. 484 00:23:54,085 --> 00:23:56,525 They're below 100,000, which is pathetic. 485 00:23:57,085 --> 00:23:58,485 That's not important. 486 00:23:58,725 --> 00:24:00,125 It is to me. 487 00:24:02,085 --> 00:24:03,365 [Becky sobs] 488 00:24:03,565 --> 00:24:06,485 [Becky] I'm trying to cheer up, but it's hard to know how to. 489 00:24:07,765 --> 00:24:08,605 [pop music playing] 490 00:24:08,725 --> 00:24:11,245 I've pretty much tried every cheer-up method I know. 491 00:24:16,605 --> 00:24:18,565 [singing] ♪ In every way ♪ 492 00:24:20,565 --> 00:24:22,765 ♪ And all through the day ♪ 493 00:24:24,845 --> 00:24:26,525 ♪ And in my dreams ♪ 494 00:24:26,605 --> 00:24:30,565 ♪ And in my silly old ways ♪ 495 00:24:32,325 --> 00:24:34,525 ♪ I'm thinking 'bout you ♪ 496 00:24:36,565 --> 00:24:38,525 ♪ Do you think 'bout me too? ♪ 497 00:24:39,765 --> 00:24:41,605 ♪ I came to say... ♪ 498 00:24:41,685 --> 00:24:42,645 Becky! 499 00:24:42,725 --> 00:24:45,125 Lucy! Hi! 500 00:24:45,205 --> 00:24:46,285 Oh, my God. 501 00:24:47,125 --> 00:24:48,485 It's so good to see you! 502 00:24:48,565 --> 00:24:49,925 I've got something for you. 503 00:24:50,325 --> 00:24:51,605 Oh, I'll just stop the music. 504 00:24:53,045 --> 00:24:54,765 -Here. -Merma! 505 00:24:54,845 --> 00:24:56,325 What? I threw her out the window. 506 00:24:56,405 --> 00:24:57,765 I know. I found her in the garden. 507 00:24:57,845 --> 00:24:58,765 I knew you'd regret it. 508 00:24:58,845 --> 00:25:00,405 And I fixed her, as well. 509 00:25:00,485 --> 00:25:03,125 -Oh! Let's sit down and talk. -Yes, okay. 510 00:25:03,205 --> 00:25:05,885 -It's really good to see you. -It's good to see you! 511 00:25:06,405 --> 00:25:08,405 I'm so sorry for the mean things that I said. 512 00:25:09,125 --> 00:25:11,085 I'm sorry for calling you a drug addict. 513 00:25:11,165 --> 00:25:12,205 And a slut. 514 00:25:12,845 --> 00:25:14,565 And you're not fake or a freak. 515 00:25:15,285 --> 00:25:17,845 -I sort of am. -Well, you're a freak that I love. 516 00:25:18,165 --> 00:25:19,565 I love you, too. 517 00:25:20,365 --> 00:25:22,685 So, what's happening with you and Jack? 518 00:25:22,765 --> 00:25:24,645 I don't know. He's weird. 519 00:25:24,725 --> 00:25:27,885 We might be together, but we haven't had sex. 520 00:25:28,165 --> 00:25:30,565 I've decided to wait till we've graduated college. 521 00:25:30,645 --> 00:25:32,125 -Just like you and I always planned. -Yes! 522 00:25:32,205 --> 00:25:33,685 Good, I'm glad. 523 00:25:34,765 --> 00:25:35,725 And... 524 00:25:36,205 --> 00:25:37,885 I don't know why I did drugs. 525 00:25:37,965 --> 00:25:40,805 I'm such an idiot, and I'm never gonna do them again. 526 00:25:40,885 --> 00:25:41,925 -Like, ever. -Good! 527 00:25:42,005 --> 00:25:43,885 -Don't ever do them. -[both giggle] 528 00:25:44,285 --> 00:25:46,085 Oh, I made something for you. 529 00:25:46,845 --> 00:25:47,845 What? 530 00:25:48,885 --> 00:25:50,205 D-I-Y. 531 00:25:50,285 --> 00:25:52,245 -[Becky] You actually made that? -[Lucy] Yeah, it's you and I. 532 00:25:52,325 --> 00:25:53,845 Oh, my God! 533 00:25:53,925 --> 00:25:56,885 Duh, it's obviously you and I. That is so cool! 534 00:25:57,405 --> 00:26:00,045 You're usually really bad at craft. This is good! 535 00:26:00,365 --> 00:26:02,125 It's not that good, Becky. 536 00:26:02,205 --> 00:26:04,405 -I love them, thank you. -Thank you. 537 00:26:04,765 --> 00:26:07,965 Also, I really want to move back in with you. 538 00:26:08,045 --> 00:26:09,245 -Yes! -If that's okay. 539 00:26:09,325 --> 00:26:11,325 Oh, my God, that is so good. I was hoping you'd say that. 540 00:26:11,405 --> 00:26:12,845 I've missed you so much. 541 00:26:12,925 --> 00:26:14,885 Same. Sisters for life. 542 00:26:14,965 --> 00:26:16,085 [laughs] 543 00:26:16,205 --> 00:26:17,205 [sobs] 544 00:26:17,325 --> 00:26:18,725 Becky, it's okay. 545 00:26:18,805 --> 00:26:20,885 Oh, my God. It's happy tears. 546 00:26:20,965 --> 00:26:22,525 -I'm fine.� -Give me a hug. 547 00:26:24,765 --> 00:26:25,605 [sniffs] 548 00:26:25,685 --> 00:26:27,045 -Are you sniffing me? -Yeah. 549 00:26:27,125 --> 00:26:29,965 I've just been really missing you, so I've been sniffing your pillow. 550 00:26:30,285 --> 00:26:31,725 -[laughs] -I like the smell of you. 551 00:26:32,365 --> 00:26:34,805 You are such a freak, but I love you. 552 00:26:34,885 --> 00:26:36,285 I know I am one. 553 00:26:36,365 --> 00:26:37,245 [laughing] 554 00:26:40,045 --> 00:26:41,645 [loud dance music playing] 555 00:26:42,405 --> 00:26:45,325 [Keith] The reaction has exceeded my expectations ten-fold. 556 00:26:45,445 --> 00:26:47,285 Stock is flying off the shelves. 557 00:26:47,365 --> 00:26:48,965 So, so far, so good. 558 00:26:49,045 --> 00:26:50,805 They are unisex. 559 00:26:50,885 --> 00:26:54,365 They will be very good for your grandson, your granddaughter. 560 00:26:54,445 --> 00:26:56,805 -You know, I have a pair at home myself. -Really? 561 00:26:56,885 --> 00:26:58,925 This one's a lovely one, there. 562 00:26:59,245 --> 00:27:01,925 -The peach, it goes well with the eyes. -Thank you. 563 00:27:02,005 --> 00:27:04,845 This is our new homeware section, here, if you can have a look. 564 00:27:04,925 --> 00:27:06,885 We've got the poufs, the ottomans. 565 00:27:07,245 --> 00:27:10,405 [Keith] It's been an incredible night for the profile of the store as a whole. 566 00:27:10,485 --> 00:27:12,765 -Have you thought about stocking rugs? -Rugs? 567 00:27:12,845 --> 00:27:16,485 Yes, we're doing rugs, carpets, blinds. Full home-install service. 568 00:27:16,565 --> 00:27:18,285 Customers are becoming aware 569 00:27:18,365 --> 00:27:22,085 that we're a multifaceted department store and we're moving with the times. 570 00:27:22,405 --> 00:27:24,525 Excuse me, loves. Sorry, sweetie. 571 00:27:24,605 --> 00:27:28,765 Oh, Keithy like the sound of this till a-ring-a-ding dinging. 572 00:27:28,845 --> 00:27:32,885 Tonight has put My Dick on the map. We are well and truly on people's radar. 573 00:27:33,325 --> 00:27:36,565 The name "My Dick"� now really means something to people. 574 00:27:37,485 --> 00:27:39,525 Could I get everyone in here, please? 575 00:27:39,605 --> 00:27:42,525 Just gather around for a few impromptu words, please. 576 00:27:42,845 --> 00:27:43,885 Find a spot. 577 00:27:45,405 --> 00:27:48,285 [Keith] I'd like to thank you all for coming along tonight. 578 00:27:48,365 --> 00:27:52,005 And I want to thank all of those here who helped me achieve my dream. 579 00:27:52,085 --> 00:27:54,405 You know who you are. I can see a lot of faces out there. 580 00:27:55,205 --> 00:28:00,365 I especially would like to thank this beautiful cash register, Karen... 581 00:28:01,245 --> 00:28:02,365 the love of my life. 582 00:28:03,805 --> 00:28:07,205 There's something I would like to share with all of you here tonight. 583 00:28:08,045 --> 00:28:11,285 And that is, I am an objectophile. 584 00:28:11,965 --> 00:28:15,765 I feel a love and attraction towards inanimate objects. 585 00:28:15,845 --> 00:28:18,045 And... in my case, usually retail 586 00:28:18,125 --> 00:28:21,565 or household electrical or mechanical appliances. 587 00:28:22,245 --> 00:28:25,045 I have been in a loving relationship with this cash register 588 00:28:25,125 --> 00:28:26,645 for the last fifteen years. 589 00:28:26,965 --> 00:28:30,005 I've tried to deny it. I've tried to brush it under the carpet. 590 00:28:30,405 --> 00:28:31,405 But... 591 00:28:32,005 --> 00:28:34,565 I can't deny how I truly feel. 592 00:28:35,725 --> 00:28:38,445 My wife and I have agreed to get a divorce, 593 00:28:38,525 --> 00:28:39,965 and to remain friends. 594 00:28:40,045 --> 00:28:42,925 And I do intend to marry Karen. 595 00:28:43,085 --> 00:28:44,645 At this stage, it is not legal. 596 00:28:44,725 --> 00:28:49,525 Our government has not recognized object-human relationships at this stage, 597 00:28:49,605 --> 00:28:54,005 but, hopefully, one day they will, and the stigma will disappear. 598 00:28:54,405 --> 00:28:59,765 So, if I could get you, June, to plug Karen in for me, please. 599 00:29:06,165 --> 00:29:07,045 Karen... 600 00:29:07,485 --> 00:29:09,445 I know I'm no oil painting... 601 00:29:09,525 --> 00:29:12,405 and... and my head's in the clouds half the time. 602 00:29:12,525 --> 00:29:18,165 But, I can promise you a life of laughs and genuine love. 603 00:29:19,245 --> 00:29:20,205 Karen... 604 00:29:20,525 --> 00:29:21,925 will you marry me? 605 00:29:27,925 --> 00:29:29,925 [applause] 606 00:29:30,165 --> 00:29:31,765 Oh, God, I love you. 607 00:29:35,445 --> 00:29:37,845 Yes! Oh, God! 608 00:29:39,885 --> 00:29:40,965 Thanks, guys. Thanks. 609 00:29:42,245 --> 00:29:43,685 Oh, I'm proud of you. 610 00:29:54,605 --> 00:29:56,445 [indistinct chatter] 611 00:29:59,565 --> 00:30:01,845 [Jana] I'm a woman that feels things deeply. 612 00:30:02,045 --> 00:30:03,445 I can't help it. 613 00:30:03,645 --> 00:30:06,525 And I have to trust my instincts and my feelings. 614 00:30:06,925 --> 00:30:10,045 But sometimes, I'll admit, I can get carried away. 615 00:30:11,525 --> 00:30:13,165 I'll message you when I get to the airport, okay? 616 00:30:13,245 --> 00:30:14,085 Okay. 617 00:30:14,445 --> 00:30:15,885 Don't forget to charge your phone. 618 00:30:15,965 --> 00:30:17,565 Oh, I would have forgotten. 619 00:30:18,285 --> 00:30:20,205 I can't remember anything without you. 620 00:30:21,285 --> 00:30:22,525 You're very good at your job. 621 00:30:23,405 --> 00:30:24,485 Thank you, Jana. 622 00:30:25,565 --> 00:30:26,525 So, I've been thinking. 623 00:30:26,605 --> 00:30:29,525 I'm going to go on my honeymoon with Craig. 624 00:30:29,605 --> 00:30:30,965 -Yep. -And then, when I get back, 625 00:30:31,045 --> 00:30:33,125 I think it's best if we find someone else for my position. 626 00:30:33,205 --> 00:30:34,165 Okay. 627 00:30:34,645 --> 00:30:36,245 But I'll help you with your transition, okay? 628 00:30:36,325 --> 00:30:37,245 Yes. 629 00:30:38,005 --> 00:30:39,685 I understand. I just... 630 00:30:40,485 --> 00:30:42,205 How will I be able to replace you? 631 00:30:43,685 --> 00:30:45,085 I love you, Jana. 632 00:30:45,405 --> 00:30:47,245 I'm just in love with Craig. 633 00:30:48,365 --> 00:30:49,925 I can't understand why. 634 00:30:52,285 --> 00:30:54,165 Well, I've got to go. 635 00:30:54,765 --> 00:30:55,645 Okay. 636 00:30:55,965 --> 00:30:57,125 Bye, darling. 637 00:30:58,165 --> 00:30:59,765 [Jana] I love to love. 638 00:30:59,845 --> 00:31:02,165 But I don't understand love. 639 00:31:12,365 --> 00:31:13,485 Bye-bye, darling. 640 00:31:14,405 --> 00:31:15,325 Bye-bye. 641 00:31:20,685 --> 00:31:21,845 Bye-bye, darling. 642 00:31:23,245 --> 00:31:24,245 Bye-bye. 643 00:31:24,725 --> 00:31:25,925 Hello, darling. 644 00:31:26,005 --> 00:31:27,685 How's my beautiful boy? 645 00:31:29,045 --> 00:31:30,205 Do you love Jana? 646 00:31:30,885 --> 00:31:32,125 Do you love Jana? 647 00:31:32,885 --> 00:31:34,525 Do you love Jana? 648 00:31:34,805 --> 00:31:37,645 But even though it makes me sad sometimes, 649 00:31:38,005 --> 00:31:40,645 I'm always grateful that I chose to love. 650 00:31:41,605 --> 00:31:43,885 No, darling, the hyenas won't get you. 651 00:31:44,805 --> 00:31:47,245 I know you think they will, but they won't. 652 00:31:53,165 --> 00:31:54,165 [Jana] Natasha! 653 00:31:55,485 --> 00:31:58,005 I'm here, Natasha! I'm here! 654 00:31:58,685 --> 00:32:00,045 Natasha! 655 00:32:01,085 --> 00:32:02,325 Natasha! 656 00:32:02,685 --> 00:32:04,045 Natasha! 657 00:32:05,005 --> 00:32:06,325 Natasha! 658 00:32:07,525 --> 00:32:08,805 Natasha! 659 00:32:10,245 --> 00:32:11,405 Natasha! 660 00:32:18,925 --> 00:32:20,805 [Quentin] After the gig, I had a long, hard think, 661 00:32:20,885 --> 00:32:23,605 and thought about some ways I could improve myself. And... 662 00:32:25,045 --> 00:32:27,125 I've been thinking about this for a while 663 00:32:27,205 --> 00:32:30,085 and I finally decided to go ahead with the ass-reduction surgery. 664 00:32:30,845 --> 00:32:32,565 So, I've checked myself into the hospital today. 665 00:32:32,645 --> 00:32:34,885 The family doesn't know. No one knows but me. 666 00:32:35,365 --> 00:32:38,045 But, I feel like my giant ass 667 00:32:38,125 --> 00:32:40,125 is holding me back in a lot of ways. 668 00:32:40,205 --> 00:32:41,725 And I think I'll be a better man without it. 669 00:32:43,445 --> 00:32:45,685 So, the procedure itself is pretty simple. 670 00:32:45,765 --> 00:32:49,725 They suck the fat out and trim the excess skin. 671 00:32:49,805 --> 00:32:51,925 It's a small scar. 672 00:32:52,685 --> 00:32:54,085 So, am I next to go in, or... 673 00:32:54,365 --> 00:32:57,565 Yeah, I think after the surgery, I will feel like less of a failure, 674 00:32:57,645 --> 00:32:58,565 if I'm honest. 675 00:32:59,045 --> 00:32:59,925 I think, uh... 676 00:33:01,125 --> 00:33:02,285 the family will... 677 00:33:02,525 --> 00:33:04,005 It's not that they find me an embarrassment, 678 00:33:04,085 --> 00:33:06,725 but I think they'll be more proud of me without it. 679 00:33:07,085 --> 00:33:08,565 And I think I'll be a better man. 680 00:33:08,725 --> 00:33:10,485 [Brian] I can see him. It's Quentin. He's here! 681 00:33:10,845 --> 00:33:12,645 -Oh, sweetheart! -How'd you find me? 682 00:33:12,725 --> 00:33:15,045 Dad found your ass MRI in your room. 683 00:33:15,205 --> 00:33:16,325 And he called the doctor. 684 00:33:16,645 --> 00:33:17,765 What the fuck are you doing, you dumb cunt? 685 00:33:17,845 --> 00:33:19,845 I don't know. I'm just sick of having a fat ass. 686 00:33:20,085 --> 00:33:22,085 I'm sick of being a joke and letting youse all down. 687 00:33:22,725 --> 00:33:26,645 Quentin, you've never, ever, ever let me down a day of your life, son. 688 00:33:27,165 --> 00:33:28,685 We're very, very proud of you. 689 00:33:28,765 --> 00:33:30,885 Me, too, darling. You're my favorite kid. 690 00:33:30,965 --> 00:33:31,885 Look... 691 00:33:31,965 --> 00:33:34,885 if it's a money thing, mate, it's no big deal. 692 00:33:34,965 --> 00:33:37,085 We can go back to Grandma's place. 693 00:33:37,165 --> 00:33:39,885 My father started this business up with nothing. 694 00:33:40,245 --> 00:33:42,085 As long as we're a family and we'll stick together, 695 00:33:42,165 --> 00:33:43,485 we'll do it all again. 696 00:33:43,565 --> 00:33:45,565 And you're an idiot if you get your ass cut off. 697 00:33:45,805 --> 00:33:47,885 -Just don't do it. -Listen to your brother. 698 00:33:48,325 --> 00:33:50,485 He's already had a pre-op sedative, 699 00:33:50,565 --> 00:33:51,765 so he might be getting a little bit drowsy. 700 00:33:51,845 --> 00:33:53,405 -Oh, okay. -Are you all right? 701 00:33:54,245 --> 00:33:55,525 Yeah, I'm just... 702 00:33:55,645 --> 00:33:58,565 Quentin, you should be proud of the Cook ass. 703 00:33:59,565 --> 00:34:01,565 It's something that we've been blessed with. 704 00:34:02,405 --> 00:34:04,085 My father, you... 705 00:34:04,805 --> 00:34:06,525 Ethan and Dustin... 706 00:34:07,005 --> 00:34:07,845 we've all got it. 707 00:34:07,925 --> 00:34:09,365 We're not gonna let you do it, anyway, Quentin. 708 00:34:09,445 --> 00:34:10,685 I'm putting my foot down. 709 00:34:11,285 --> 00:34:14,845 And you know, Quentin, you can still go and do your records. 710 00:34:15,565 --> 00:34:17,725 -You can still go and do your paintings. -That's true. 711 00:34:17,805 --> 00:34:20,405 But, mate, you're a real estate agent. 712 00:34:20,845 --> 00:34:22,205 It's who you are. 713 00:34:22,285 --> 00:34:23,965 But we're here to support you. 714 00:34:24,765 --> 00:34:26,845 -It's because we love you. -That's it. 715 00:34:28,045 --> 00:34:28,885 Quentin. 716 00:34:29,805 --> 00:34:31,045 Wait. Quentin? 717 00:34:32,005 --> 00:34:32,965 Are you listening, dude? 718 00:34:33,045 --> 00:34:34,525 -Quentin. -Is he dead? 719 00:34:34,605 --> 00:34:36,285 No, Mum. He's just had a sedative. 720 00:34:36,365 --> 00:34:37,925 He's just asleep. He's fine. 721 00:34:38,005 --> 00:34:40,085 -Quentin, we don't want you to do this. -No. 722 00:34:40,165 --> 00:34:41,525 We don't want you to do it. 723 00:34:42,245 --> 00:34:45,045 Oi, put your thumb up if you don't want the operation. 724 00:34:49,045 --> 00:34:50,845 [all laugh] 725 00:34:51,165 --> 00:34:52,205 Come on, let's take him home. 726 00:34:52,285 --> 00:34:54,725 [Lyn] Let's get him out of here. Come on, boys. 727 00:34:54,805 --> 00:34:56,965 Just take it easy, bro. We're gonna be home soon. 728 00:35:05,325 --> 00:35:07,325 [theme music playing] 729 00:35:07,375 --> 00:35:11,925 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 54043

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