All language subtitles for Fosse Verdon s01e01 Life Is A Cabaret.eng

[tapping]

[knock on door]

- [sighs]

You're a little early.

[knocking continues]

Isn't time yet.

[knocking continues]

[soft music]

*

Can I see it?

That's nice.
Then the hand.

- As I'm stepping back?
- Yeah.

[sighs]

That wasn't it.

- Well, take it up with
the choreographer.

It was his idea, not mine.

*

- [chuckles]
Did we fire him?

- Oh, give the man
another shot.

He's still learning.

- Break the leg.

*

- Like this?

- Yeah, that's nice.
Show me the reverse.

Eh.

Yours is better.
Let's do it again.

["Big Spender" plays]

- Dancers to set.

*

Standby.

*

- Bring it over here
for blocking.

- Why are you standing
like that?

- I thought
this was my position.

- Yeah, well, why is the
character you're playing

putting all of her weight
on the banister like that?

- The choreography.

*

- How long have you been
dancing in those heels tonight?

Five hours maybe?

- Six, at least.
- Six.

- Hey mister, can I talk
to you for a minute?

- Got a cigarette for me,
mister? Huh?

- All you want to do
is sit down.

I mean, it is all
you can think about.

You close your eyes.

You see love seats, armchairs,
church pews, subway benches.

- But you got a problem.
The manager's watching.

You--you can't sit down in
the middle of your shift.

- Got that little boy
at home, doesn't she?

- Yeah.

- Depending on that paycheck.

*

Maybe if you can shift
your weight off your heels

onto the banister,

just maybe you can make it
through one more dance.

- Uh, who's here?

- [chuckles]
- Hey, Shirley. How are ya?

- Good, I feel lucky
I can still walk

after yesterday's rehearsal.

She's a taskmaster, this one.

- [chuckles] Well,
I learned from the best.

- Need her in one piece
there, Gwen.

Hey, I need to talk to you
for a second.

- Yeah?
- Wanna get a cup of coffee...

- Girls.

*

When you're walking backwards
and you roll the shoulder,

it's not a seduction,
it's a con job.

[girls laugh]

Now he doesn't know that, so...

[shushing]

*

- Can you freeze right there,
ladies?

It's got to be tighter.
I need it tighter.

I wanna see the sweat.

I wanna see the spot where
they missed their foundation.

- They're too crowded
together.

If you come in tight, you're
going to ruin the composition.

- Cut one of the dancers.

- Huh?
- More room.

- Yeah. Which one?

- New girl on the end.

- [sighs] Okay.

- Sweetheart!

- We're re-blocking.

*

women: Psss!
- Okay, stop.

Hold it right there.

- I need you to get through
to him, Gwen.

The studio is adamant.

Charity under no circumstances
can use the expression,

"Up Yours."

It--it--it--it--it's obscene.

- Quiet, please.

- Can I tell you what I do
when I'm nervous?

I take three deep breaths,
in and out.

[inhales, exhales]

In and out. In...

- [inhales, exhales]
- And out.

Better, isn't it?

- We're gonna have to lose
another dancer.

We have to lose
another dancer.

Yeah.

We have to re-block.

We're re-blocking.
- In and out.

- Everybody, we're re-blocking.

*

- Carrie, sorry,
we're gonna have to--

we're gonna have to lose you,
okay? I'm so sorry.

We're going to find another
spot for you, all right?

[bell rings]
- Mark.

- Quiet, please.
- Picture's up, everybody.

*

- Stand by.

- Scene 7, take 1.
Roll camera.

- Mark.
[click]

- Rolling!
- Rolling!

- Playback.

*

[beeping]

- * The minute you walked
in the joint *

* I could see you were
a man of distinction *

* A real big spender

* Good lookin',
so refined *

* Say, wouldn't you like
to know *

* What's goin' on
in my mind? *

* So, let me get right
to the point *

* I don't pop my cork
for every guy I see *

* Hey, big spender

*

* Hey, big spender!

*

* Hey, big spender

*

* Spend

* A little time with

* Me

* Fun, laughs, good time

* Fun, laughs, good time

* Fun, laughs, good time

- How about it, palsy?

women: Yeah.

*

- Cut.
- Cutting.

[bell rings]

Okay, let's move on.

- Check the gain.
- That's good, girls.

Nice.
- It's clear. Moving on.

*

- Oh, listen,
I wanted to tell you.

Nicole and I stopped by
the Ziegfeld on our way home.

- Hmm.
- There were people lined up

all the way down to 7th Avenue
to buy tickets.

- Maybe they were there to see
"The Love Bug."

- [giggles] Stop.

The Ziegfeld only has
one screen and you know it.

- Well, but do they know that?

- Well, I didn't ask that.

- Is that new?

- Yeah, I made it.
Do you like it?

Can you zip me?

- [sighs]

- Going in the wrong direction.

- [smooching]
Am I?

- Our guests will be here
in five minutes.

- It's always good to...

keep your audience waiting.
[door slams]

- * Well, I'm going
to Chicago *

* But I can't take you

* Well, I'm going to Chicago

* But I can't take you

* There ain't nothin'
in Chicago

* That a girl
like you can do *

*

* Well, I'm going to Chicago

* I'm gonna take
my rocking chair, baby *

* Well, I'm going to Chicago

* I'm gonna take
my rocking chair, baby *

*

- Hey. Okay, now,
it's your bedtime.

Trade?
Thank you.

- Neil understands
what I'm saying.

- Listen to me, you're gonna
be absolutely insufferable

now that you're a hotshot
Hollywood director, right?

- Next thing you know,
he's gonna show up

at the Carnegie Deli
wearing a beret.

- [chuckles] I made one film.
One film.

- Oh, it's worse than
I thought.

He's already calling
his movie a film.

My God, somebody put him out
of his misery already.

Listen to him.
- This is from Paddy Chayefsky,

the most pretentious son of
a bitch on the planet Earth.

- I never said I wasn't.

- I got my hands
over my head.

I say, "Officer, this
is all a big misunderstanding.

I'm--I'm Bob Fosse."
He says, "Who?"

- Do you know how many times
he's told this story?

It happened 15 years ago.

- The guy is convinced
he's caught some pervert

trying to break into
Gwen Verdon's rehearsal room

for God knows what kind
of sordid purpose.

- Which, to be fair,
is not entirely untrue.

[all laughing]
- Touché.

I finally come out
and then I say,

"Officer, give me a break!
I'm Gwen Verdon's husband!

I'm her husband!"
- And the poor kid,

he turns bright red and says,

"Well, gee, why in the world
didn't you say so

in the first place,
Mr. Verdon?"

[laughter]

- I'm busy directing
Steve's new musical.

- Am I the only one who liked
the last one

that he did with Dick?

- Yeah, I think so.
- Oh.

- What's this one about?

- A single guy who can't hold
down a relationship.

His married friends
all want him to get married,

even though
they're all miserable.

- Oh, I'm on the edge
of my seat.

[both laughing]

- You know, I bet Cy is still
looking for somebody

to do "Cabaret,"
if you're interested.

- No.
- My book is already

starting to fill up.
- Oh, Bobby's too big-time now

to do a little art musical.

- I didn't say that.
I didn't say that.

- What are you working on
these days, Gwen? Tell me.

- Uh, oh, well, uh,
Bobby and I have been so busy--

- Picture of the year,
Bobby.

- Oh, thanks, sweetheart.
- It's a masterpiece.

- Thank you.
Thanks, sweetheart.

- So when are you gonna
cast me in a movie, Bobby?

- Uh, next one. Next one.

- I'm gonna remember
you said that.

- All right, all right.
Nice to see ya.

- Some--a change of pace.

- Anyone want another drink?

- Now I'm only going to say
this once

and then I will never ever
say it again.

- Please, just don't.
- It should have been you.

- Okay, well, I'm glad
that you've gotten it

out of your system.

- Now I might be
a little bit buzzed.

- I think so, maybe.
- But Shirley MacLaine?

- Stop.

- Bobby should never have
replaced you.

"Charity" was your show.

- Shirley was cast before Bobby
was even hired.

You know, the only reason
he got the job

was because Shirley told
the studio

she wouldn't do it
without him.

- Be that as it may, you were
the best thing about that show,

and my husband wrote it.

- Stop.
- Ladies and germs.

Ladies and degenerates.

May I present Mr. Bob Fosse.

- Oh! She's the cutest.

[laughing]
- Hey!

- Once more from the top!

- Try that.

- [muffled]
Once more from the top!

- Dead ringer.

- God help me.

I've got two actresses
in the family now.

- * If they could see me now

* That little gang of mine

* I'm eating fancy chow
and drinking fancy wine *

* I'd like those stumble bums
to see for a fact *

* The kind of top drawer,
first-rate chums I attract *

* All I can say is wow-ee,
look at where I am *

* Tonight, I landed, pow,
right in a pot of jam *

[telephone ringing]

[singing fades]

[telephone ringing,
vacuum running]

[ringing]

[ringing]

[clinking]

- Apparently, we--we broke
a record.

It's record breaking.

Yes.
[chuckles]

Uh, no, I haven't heard
from the studio.

What are they gonna say?

Thanks for losing
[laughing] 20 million bucks?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'll be okay.

It's only a movie.

Okay? It's just a movie.

[chuckles] All right.

Okay, see you later.

[traffic sounds]

[silent]

[sad music]

*

- Oh. Bobby.

- There she is.

- It's 3:00 in the morning.

Come to bed with me
- [chuckles]

- Come.

Oh.

You must be tired.

- I knew it wasn't
gonna be any good.

- [whispers] Stop it.

It's not true.

- Yeah,
as soon I saw the set.

They turned Times Square
into a, uh, Disney cartoon.

- You made the movie that
the studio hired you to make.

I don't know what else
could you--

- You read the reviews?
- Yes.

I read "Variety",
and it is a rave.

- Did you see the "Times"?

- I read
"The Hollywood Reporter."

I mean, they couldn't get over

- "Hollywood Reporter."
- How much they loved it.

- "Variety, Hollywood Re--"
"'Sweet Charity' is a movie

haunted by the presence of
an unseen star,

- Oh...
- "Gwen Verdon."

- Well, that's ridiculous.
- "Although Miss MacLaine

"often looks like Miss Verdon,

"she never succeeds in
recreating the eccentric line

that gave cohesion

to the original."
- I don't want to do this.

- You're the star and
you're not even in the movie.

- Bob, stop.
- [laughs]

- Go to bed.
I love you.

- No, come.
Let's read some more reviews.

- [sighs]

Let's read
the "Chicago Tribune."

*

This is a doozy.

[tapping]

[inhales]

- Don't show me the effort,
Bobby.

Don't show me the sweat.

All I want to see is
that smile.

Again, from the top.
A five, six, seven, eight.

[tapping]

[tapping stops]

[distant chatter]

[rattling]

[water running]

[slurp]

- Yeah, well,
that one came together.

I mean,
it--it was tough at first.

Look, the book was spectacular.

The--the score was great
and your work was--

the--the choreography
was brilliant.

But that was, uh, uh,
that was a beauty.

That--Bob, we had some good
times on that show,

the two of us.

- You nearly killed me but, uh,
putting that aside, you know.

- Hey, name one
show of yours

that didn't nearly
kill you, Bobby.

- [chuckles] What's, uh, what's
keeping you busy these days?

- I got, uh, I got a movie
I'm shooting next year.

- That's, uh, "Cabaret,"
right?

I heard you're doing
the adaptation.

I loved the show.
I loved it.

- What's not to love?

You got homosexuals,
Nazis, Jews.

It's got all the makings
of a real blockbuster.

- You have a director?

I haven't gotten around
to Nazis,

but Jews and homosexuals
are a specialty of mine.

I could do the steps too.

You--you're gonna need
a choreographer anyway.

- I didn't--I didn't know
you were interested.

- I'm very interested.

- In this film, specifically?

- What else would
I be interested in?

- A job.
[chuckles]

Well, what about--
what about Gwen?

Would--would she
be involved too?

- What, I'm sorry?

- If I can tell the studio
I got Bobby and Gwen,

that's--that's a real draw.

- Gwen's got a lot
of other commitments.

I'm not sure she--she could fit
it in her schedule.

- Well, you know,
listen, Bobby, I'm--

I'm just producing.

Manny Wolf at the studio,

he--he--he's the one
choosing the director,

but I'll put out
a good word, though.

- I'll go ahead
and give him a call too

just--just to--just
to introduce myself.

- The fact of the matter is

I'm not sure this is
your kind of movie.

This is, uh, it's an intimate
musical drama.

It's an adult picture.

What you do and what you do
really well is...style.

I mean, flash.

This movie, this is--I think it
needs a--a--a different touch.

Yeah?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

Well, listen,
uh, I'm just--

I'm so glad we got
a chance to catch up.

- Did you serve, Cy?

- Did I serve?

- I was in the Navy.
I was, actually.

I was in the special
entertainment unit.

We had a little show we did
all over the South Pacific.

Bases, hospitals.

These guys in there,
they were my age.

They were kids,
19, 20.

One of them, he was 17, fudged
his age to the draft board.

One side of his face
was blown off.

And another kid,
he was burned up so bad,

they had to pump him
full of morphine.

Otherwise, they said
all he would do was scream.

There I was up on stage,
in tap shoes.

[inhales, exhales]

A big, shit-eating smile.

And we pulled out
all the tricks--

one-footed wings,
double pickups.

Flash, you could call it.

Out there,
there's a war going on.

Bodies piling up,
but in here? We're dancing.

Just don't look too close
at the kids in the audience--

missing arms, missing legs--
you'll have a grand time.

What good is sitting alone
in your room inside?

Come hear the music play.

Life is a cabaret, old chum.

* Come to the cabaret

I'm the director
for this movie, Cy.

I'm the guy.

[knocking]

I'm the guy. I'm sure of it.

- Like I said,

I'll put in a good word
with Manny. Yeah?

- Okay.
- Let me talk to him first.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Patience, Bobby.
Okay?

- Yeah. All right.

[elevator ding]

Hi.

- Hi.

- I'm, uh, I'm Bob Fosse.

- Uh, okay, do you--

- I didn't catch your name.

- It's--it's Jane.

- Jane. You have
a terrific smile, Jane.

Terrific eyes, yeah.

I'm here to see,
uh, Manny Wolf.

- Is he--is he expecting you?

- Um...

No, Jane. No, he is not.

- Well, when was the last time

that we asked about
the rights to "Chicago"?

Heels are glued to the floor.

[soft classical music]

I just think that it would be
a perfect fit for both of us.

Bob Fosse and Gwen Verdon
back together on Broadway.

I think it could be
a huge draw, Sam.

Lift all the way
from the hips.

[door opens]

Well, I'm sorry, but a musical
with some commercial appeal

wouldn't be the end
of the world.

We haven't had a hit
in three years.

- Is that Sam?

- I better run.
Good talking, bye-bye.

Bye.

Nicole has been practicing
her routine all afternoon.

Look at this, look.
Look, look!

She can't wait to show you.

- You're calling my agent?

- Oh, oh, no.
We were just chatting.

- You knew I wouldn't
get the job.

- [tsks]

[sighs] I'm sorry.

- Covering all your bases,
huh?

- Well, what did he say?

- Uh...

He said, um...

I'm hired.

- [laughs] Yes!

You son of a bitch!

Oh, God,
you had me scared to death!

- Liza Minnelli's
playing Sally.

- Can she act?
- Well, we'll find out.

Honey, we're making a movie.

[end chords]

[crowd clamoring]

- Hi, Bobby.
- Hi, Bob.

- Hey kids, how's tricks?

- Hey, everybody's here.
- Hi, Bobby.

You've got some energy.
- Lots of it.

- Save some.
Hey.

- Hi.

- Nice to see you.
You look great.

Easy on that lager, fellas.

It's a work night.

Ach du lieber
or whatever they say.

[bar music]

*

What was that?

- I'm sorry?

- What you did with your arms.
Let me see that again.

- [chuckles]

- Yeah, but the left hand is...

Don't worry,
I'm a professional.

Right there.

Yeah, that's it.

Yeah, that's nice.

- [chuckles]
- What's your name?

- Hannah.

- Ah, are you a dancer,
Hannah?

- [chuckles] Oh, no.
No, I'm, uh, the translator,

uh, for the production.

- Bobby, darling!

[squeals, laughs]

Oh, I've been counting down the
hours for this day to arrive.

- Great to see ya.

- Oh, uh, I got it cut short
like Louise Brooks.

I thought it'd be perfect for
the period. Don't you love it?

- What if I don't?

Just kidding.

- Oh, you're bad!

- [chuckles] You want a drink?

Can we get the star a drink?

[all laughing]

[lively folk music]

*

- Hey, Mr. Cy Feuer.

I didn't know you'd
be here for this.

- I hope you know how...
pleased I am.

Everything worked out.

- Is that right?

- I just wish you hadn't gone
over my head the way you did.

I really wished
you hadn't done that.

- I took one meeting
with Manny.

- Yeah.
- Okay?

- I don't even know why
I'm surprised.

You pulled the same shit
with me on "How to Succeed."

Undermining me.
Making me look like a schmuck.

- Well, safe travels back
to New York, Cy.

Nice to see you.

- New York?
What are you talking about?

I'm not going anywhere.

Oh, yeah. No.
Manny wants me here.

I'm supervising.

This is not going to be another
$20 million fiasco

like your last picture.

You can count on that.

[coughing]

[coughing]

[scratch]

- A five, a six, a five,
six, seven, eight.

Don't show me the effort,
Bobby, don't show me the sweat.

All I want to see is
that smile!

Posture, Bobby.

Look, you're hunching.
Pull back the shoulders.

Again, six, seven, eight.

[vocalizing]

Oh, snap and showbiz!

Where's that smile?
There it is.

Remember there's always
somebody better than you

out there, Bobby.

Always someone working
harder than you.

[tapping, clapping]

Don't think for a second
I couldn't replace you

a hundred times over.

Understand?

[tapping]

[rattling]

[tapping fades]

- I thought this would be
a great option.

Simple, classic, elegant.

- I don't think black--I mean,
it's the Tonys, not a funeral.

- Oh, in my experience, the two
have quite a bit in common.

[both chuckling]

- I prefer funerals.

- Well, they're shorter
at least.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Say hello to your Aunt Joan.

- Hello to your Aunt Joan.

- Nancy will be so sad
she missed you.

- You may go now.

[pats]

- Oh.

- What caught your eye?

- I love this one.

[sighs]

- Oh, it--well, it's adorable.

- When are you two going
to Munich?

- Oh, we decided it made more
sense if Nicole and I

just stayed home on this one.

- You decided or he decided?

- Well, we both decided.

Please, Bobby doesn't need
my help directing a movie.

- You know I adore Bobby

but that's not the part
I'm worried about.

- This too fancy?

- No such thing, dear.
You know that.

- They're my colors.

- [chuckles]
- Okay.

- [chuckles]

- Besides, I don't have the
time to go even if I wanted to.

You know I'm looking
for a play.

My agent sent me about
a hundred scripts.

- A straight play?

- It would be nice to make
something on my own again

to remind people I still can--

What about this?

For the party after?

- Oh, I love
a little Grecian number.

- I feel like for dancing,
maybe if we ham it.

- Absolutely.

- A mini?
Am I too old?

Be honest with me.
- I mean, those legs

aren't too old.
Show them off.

[distant chatter]

[distant chatter]

*

- What are we waiting
for exactly?

It's 11:00, we haven't
gotten the first shot.

- We're ten away from picture.
Bobby, I need you at camera.

- Who are these people?
- Background, extras.

- We need new ones.
They look like actors.

- They are actors.

- They're supposed
to be patrons

of a Berlin nightclub
in 1933.

Pickpockets,
perverts, prostitutes.

- What do you wanna do?

You wanna roam the streets
of Munich now

searching for prostitutes?

- You know where to find
prostitutes?

- [chuckles]

Oh, uh...

- [speaking German]

- [speaking German]

- [chuckles] Uh, she, uh,
she wants to know if you two

are wanting to, um,

get, uh, pleasured?

- Uh, tell them
we're not here for sex.

Uh, tell them
we're casting a movie.

- [speaking German]

- Has anyone ever done
any acting before?

Stage? Film?
- [speaking German]

- [speaking German]

- Does pornography count?

- Why not?
- [speaking German]

- That's terrific.

Tell them that they're
in a nightclub

and there's a very funny,
very entertaining act on stage.

- [speaking German]

- Tell them to pretend that
they're watching it

and they're enjoying it.

- [speaking German]

[all laugh]

- Okay, her, her, her.

I don't need them,
the rest are hired.

- [speaking German]

- [speaking German]

- She says you only
picked the old women.

The ugly ones.
It's not fair.

- Fair.

Tell her this is show business.

- I never had to translate
before in a brothel.

- Well, you can check that
off your list.

- [chuckles] Yes.

- You know, when I was, uh,
when I was a kid,

I used to dance
in places like that

with women like that.

- When you were a kid?

- Yeah.

- You started as a dancer?

- Mm-hmm.

- Well, when did you decide
you wanted to be a director?

- I never wanted
to be a director.

All I ever wanted to be
was Fred Astaire.

- [chuckles] What happened?

- Well...

It turns out,
I--I wasn't Fred Astaire.

- Aww.

Show me.

- Right now?
- Mm-hmm.

[chuckles]

Oh, very, very good.

Oh! [chuckles]

[soft music]

*

I have a boyfriend.

- I won't hold it against you.

- [chuckles]

And you are married.

*

- [sighs]

You know, we're on a different
continent.

I think there's a special
exemption for that, right?

*

[sizzling]

[clinking]

- "Because you've taught me
that part of love

which is tender."

- Oh darn, is that me?

[sighs]

[reading under breath]

"Oh, Jaques,
we're used to each other..."

[telephone ringing]

"We're a pair of captive hawks
caught in the same cage,

and so we've grown used
to each other?"

Is that right?

- Hello, Fosse residence.
- Mm-hmm.

- Oh, I can't believe
that's right!

- Mrs. Fosse,
- Thank you, dear.

Hello?

Yes, this is her mother.

- * Bye, bye

* And snap

[snapping]

- I want to see
every move isolated.

Every move.

I want to see every muscle,
every tendon.

- * Do do

- Focus is front, Caitlyn.

And again.

- Here we go.

And seven, eight, and--

Doo, doo!
[snapping]

[line trilling]

[line ringing]
[snapping continues]

[clinking]

[line trilling]

* It was a fine affair

* But now it's over
Bllll!

- * And though
I used to care *

* I need the open air

- I saw some of the footage
you're getting, Bobby.

It's too dark.

You're--you're not putting
enough light on the scenes.

- It's a nightclub, Cy.

Nightclubs are dark.

- * I always said that
I was a rover *

- You need to pull out, ladies.
Legs up!

- * You mustn't
knit your brow *

- 90 degrees, ladies,
not 60.

- * You've every cause
to doubt me, mein herr *

- Let's work from the top,
please.

I'm sorry, ladies.
Once more from the top.

- * It was a fine affair
but now it's over *

[line trilling]

- * And though
I used to care *

* I need the open air

* You're better off
without me mein herr *

- Watch that line.
It's not working.

I need you to pull out,
ladies.

Legs, legs.
- We've gotta shoot.

Come on, shoot something.
Come on, what are we--

What are we doing?
- * And every cause to

* Doubt me, mein herr

- And again.

How much time do I have?

- Ten away from picture.
- It's still not right.

It's still not working.
- Can we shoot?

- Why isn't this working?
- Five, six, seven, eight.

Hand!
- I can't tell a thing

if you're marking it, ladies.

What am I seeing?
I don't know what I'm seeing.

And again.

- Yes, please give him
the message.

- You.

- And also, if you could
tell him that his daughter

brought a bottle
of Seconal to school,

that would be wonderful.

- You're doing
this wrong every time.

Is there a reason you're doing
it wrong every time?

- Seconal. S-E-C-O...
- And again. And again.

And again. And again. Again.
- N-A-L.

Seconal.
- Why are you stopping?

Why are we stopping?

- Oh, it's my pleasure.
Thank you.

Bye.

- Why--why are we not shooting?

Somebody tell me what--
What the hell is going on here?

- Can we take it again
from "fine affair"?

- What's happening?
- We're rehearsing.

- What?
Where--where is everybody?

- Bob cleared the set.
- What?

- Cameras were supposed to be
rolling two hours ago.

- It was a fine...
- * Affair

- I don't--what are we doing?

- We're just waiting for Bob to
approve wardrobe for the scene.

- Wardrobe?

Okay, all right,
you know what?

I need ladies back
in their trailers.

Get into costume.

- Well, I'd love to do that,
Cy,

but unfortunately
there's no costumes.

- What do you mean there's no--

You've been shown
50 different options!

- Well, nobody's shown me
what I want.

- You don't know what you want!

- I know exactly what I want.
- Really?

- But you keep whispering
in everyone's ear

that this is supposed to look
like a goddamn musical.

- It is a goddamn musical.

- I'm trying
to do something original

and you don't
understand it.

- I don't understand it?

Okay, this--this is the excuse
of every insecure artist.

I don't understand?

- And it makes you
uncomfortable.

You know what? It's flash.
You--you doing flash.

This is exactly what I said
in the beginning.

- All right, I'm not going
to be bullied into making

another candy-coated
family-friendly--

- Yeah, you got your little bag
of tricks in there,

but there's no substance.

So what do you do?
You turn off all the lights

and then we're supposed
to think

you're some kind
of cinematic genius?

- Tell me one thing you've done
for me in this movie.

One me thing.
- I'll tell ya two.

I hired ya and
so far I haven't fired ya.

As I was saying,
you may go.

[door opens]

[slams]

[somber jazz]

*

[scratch]

*

[rattling]

*

[scratch]

*

[tapping]

*

[clamoring]

[indistinct chatter]

*

[clattering]

[clattering]

[dial tone]

[hangs up]

[clattering]

[rotary phone dialing]

[telephone ringing]

- [sighs]

[ringing]

Hello?

- How are you, kid?
Uh, it's me.

- [sighs]
Well, where have you been?

- I--I've just been, uh...

I've been meaning to call,
I just, uh...

- You didn't get my messages?

- Uh, yeah--yeah.

It's just been--it's been,
uh--It's just been--

It's been so hectic and...

[sighs]

Listen, I--It'd be great to get
you here for a few days.

You know, maybe, uh, get
your--get your eyes

on some of the numbers.
We're, um...

What do you think
about that?

*

- [sighs]

*

Am I going to be unhappy
when I get there?

- No, of course not.

*

Why would you be unhappy?

I need you.
I need you here, Gwen.

Come on, what do you say?

- Well, um...

Well, let me just see
what I can do.

- Okay, okay.
You're the best.

- Okay, bye-bye.
Bye, Bob.

*

Hmm.

[click]

- [sniffing]

*

- So, I saw...
- [chuckles]

this in the closet.

and I thought, well, now
that is Sally Bowles to a tee.

- [gasps]
It is absolutely gorgeous!

- And with the green
nail polish.

- What about this?
- Oh.

- What about this for, um,
for "Mein Herr"?

- What do I wear underneath?

- Um, a button down?

- Oh, no. No.

Nothing underneath.

Trust me, she'll be stunning.

*

[chuckling]

So I brought you
my favorite kimonos...

[scratch]

- Why are you wearing
all this makeup?

The character you're playing.

- Maybe she doesn't want
to be recognized.

- Now that's interesting.

- Maybe she used to be
a society girl.

Then she met the wrong man.

- He swindled her
for all she's worth

and now she's shaking
her rump for tips.

- Open.

- Beautiful.

Most of the first verse
will play in the close-up.

- And then you want to widen?

- Yeah, little fragments
throughout.

- On the snare.

- I'm glad you're here.

- They told me you were here.
I didn't believe it.

- Cy!
- Hey, look at you.

- Oh!
[smooch]

Everything looks marvelous!

You know you're going to make
a fantastic picture.

- Well, if only you can get
your husband

to pick up the pace
a little bit.

- Can we have a pleasant
conversation for five minutes?

- He's a pain in the ass, Cy.
- Yeah.

- Oh, you think I don't
know that better than anyone?

- All right.
- Guilty as charged.

- Go, go, go.

- Okay, I better
get back to work.

Pick up the pace.

- [chuckles] Picking up?

He's making it so dark, Gwen.
- What?

He's--he's--he's treating it
like it's some sort of--

I don't know, Italian
neorealist nightmare

or something, but listen,
I promised the studio

a Broadway musical.

Yes, with some social import
but not this...

What?
- It isn't right.

- Okay, this--this is his
answer to every question.

It isn't right.

- It's--it's ugly.

- It's funny!

- It's not supposed
to be funny.

- What are you--what is--
it's a comedic number.

- The number, exactly,
not the costume.

- This is a joke on top
of a joke.

- I don't know what that--what?

- The character is singing
a love song about a gorilla.

It's not a joke gorilla,
it's a gorilla-gorilla.

- Then when the bottom
drops out--

- * If you could see
her through my eyes *

She wouldn't
look Jewish at all.

- It's a gut punch.

- I understand the scene.

You realize, all at once,
you've allowed yourself

to be entertained
by a monster

and if you're busy laughing
at the joke gorilla,

you miss the whole thing.

That's what Bob's saying.

- She should be beautiful.
He's in love with her.

- I've been to every studio
in Munich.

Every studio in Berlin.
- Could you walk away?

- This is the only gorilla suit
in Germany.

- You know, you throw a rock
in New York City

and you'll hit one.

- The number shoots
in three days.

- That's plenty of time.

- Oh, so someone's gonna fly
to New York,

find a gorilla suit,

and then immediately fly back
to Munich in 72 hours?

- I'll do it.

You saw what happened with
"Sweet Charity"--

- Well--
- And with "Doctor Doolittle,"

and with "Star."

Each one of them
a big, fat flop!

Kids in the jungle are being
zipped into body bags

on the evening news.

Richard Nixon is our president,
God help us.

People aren't going to
the movies to escape anymore.

They're going to find
something true.

- Well, I wish you had been
here from the start.

He needs you.

- I just know how to speak Bob.

It's my native tongue.

- God bless.

[smooch]

I'm glad you're here.
- I am too.

["Mein Herr" plays]

- * Bye, bye, mein

* Lieber herr

* Farewell,
mein lieber herr *

* It was a fine affair

* But now it's over

* And though I used to care

* I need the open air

* You're better off without me,
mein herr *

* Don't dab your eye,
mein herr *

* Or wonder why, mein herr

* I've always said
that I was a rover *

* You mustn't
knit your brow *

* You should have known
by now *

* You've every cause
to doubt me, mein herr *

* Bye bye, mein lieber herr

* Auf wiedersehen, mein herr

* Es war sehr gut, mein herr,
und vorbei *

* Du kennst mich wohl,
mein herr *

* Ach, lebe wohl,
mein herr *

* Du sollst mich nie
mehr sehen, mein herr *

* Bye bye, mein herr
- * Mein herr

* Auf wiedersehen

* Es war sehr gut

- * Und vorbei

- * Du kennst mich wohl
- * Mein herr

* Ach, lebe wohl

* Du sollst mich nie

- * And bye-bye

* Bye bye mein lieber herr

* Farewell mein lieber herr

* It was a fine affair
but now it's over *

* And though I used to care,
I need the open air *

* You're better off
without me *

* You'll get on without me

- * Auf wiedersehen

* Es war sehr gut

- * Mein herr

- Cut.

[applause]

[bell ringing]

What did I do to deserve you?

- [chuckles] You know,
I don't know.

- Hey.

[soft music]

Thank you.

*

- When I come back...

*

- I promise.
- Okay.

*

["Cabaret" plays]

*

- * I used to have this
girlfriend known as Elsie *

* With whom I shared four
sordid rooms in Chelsea *

* She wasn't what you'd call
a blushing flower *

* As a matter of fact,
she rented by the hour *

* The day she died the
neighbors came to snicker *

* Well, that's what comes from
too much pills and liquor *

[clinking]

* But when I saw her laid out
like a queen *

* She was the happiest
corpse I'd ever seen *

* I think of Elsie
to this very day *

* I remember
how she'd turn to me

* And say

- There you are.

- What I said the other day,
Bobby.

- That's water--water
under the bridge, Cy.

Don't worry about it.

- All right, well,
you and Gwen...

make a hell of a team.

- * What good is sitting all
alone in your room? *

* Come hear the music play

*

* Life is a cabaret

* Old chum

* Come to the cabaret

[elevator dings]

* And as for me,
And as for me *

* I made my mind up,
back in Chelsea *

* When I go

* I'm going like Elsie

* Start by admitting

* From cradle to tomb

* It isn't that long a stay

* Life is a cabaret,
old chum *

- Hello?

- Gorilla delivery!

*

- * It's only a cabaret,
old chum *

* And I love a cabaret

*

- [sighs]

- I told you
the curtain is at 7:00.

- [sighs]

God, you look magnificent.

[tapping]

- Let's go.
It's time.

["Willkommen" plays]

[singing in German]

*

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