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1
00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:07,199
- You close with your family?
- We get on with it.
2
00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:08,799
I have this amazing
new partner out there.
3
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:10,359
He's really pushed the company forward.
4
00:00:10,360 --> 00:00:11,679
She's commuting from Finland.
5
00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:13,879
- Any friends?
- Sorry?
6
00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:16,399
- Does your little cafe do canapes?
- Yeah, it totally could.
7
00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:18,039
And I will hire you to do the canapes.
8
00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,872
Just... a girl with no friends and an
empty heart?
9
00:00:20,897 --> 00:00:23,505
- By your own description.
- I have friends.
10
00:00:23,530 --> 00:00:24,958
Oh, have you got to go back to
Finland again?
11
00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:27,583
- No, Finland are coming here.
- Oh! That's easier for you.
12
00:00:27,607 --> 00:00:29,846
Sex didn't bring anything... good.
13
00:00:29,847 --> 00:00:32,086
And what have you found in your
abstinence?
14
00:00:32,087 --> 00:00:33,606
Oh, God, I fancy a priest.
15
00:00:33,607 --> 00:00:34,886
Thank you so much for helping.
16
00:00:34,887 --> 00:00:37,212
Father, we have a cupcake
situation over here!
17
00:00:37,236 --> 00:00:38,926
- Okay, Pam!
- Arm touch.
18
00:00:38,927 --> 00:00:40,385
- I'm sorry for your loss.
- What?
19
00:00:40,409 --> 00:00:41,566
Your baby.
20
00:00:41,567 --> 00:00:42,606
Does Martin know?
21
00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:44,235
You're not supposed to tell anyone
for the first twelve...
22
00:00:44,260 --> 00:00:45,274
You can tell the father.
23
00:00:45,299 --> 00:00:47,566
- Yes, Father?
- Come on, have a read.
24
00:00:47,567 --> 00:00:50,526
And if you ever want to talk about
stuff, I'm here, you know.
25
00:00:50,527 --> 00:00:52,567
You can come whenever you want.
26
00:00:53,687 --> 00:00:55,646
I'd like you to come.
27
00:00:55,647 --> 00:00:56,687
If it helps.
28
00:00:59,359 --> 00:01:02,488
[HOLY MUSIC]
29
00:01:09,967 --> 00:01:11,127
[SHE GASPS]
30
00:01:14,207 --> 00:01:17,527
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
31
00:01:17,607 --> 00:01:18,766
Just don't...
32
00:01:18,767 --> 00:01:21,606
...talk too much or try to pretend
you know anything about the company.
33
00:01:21,607 --> 00:01:24,006
- Okay.
- And don't be funny or clever or...
34
00:01:24,007 --> 00:01:25,766
Just don't be the centre of attention.
35
00:01:25,767 --> 00:01:27,890
These people are very important to
me, so just don't...
36
00:01:27,914 --> 00:01:30,476
- Okay.
- ...don't be yourself.
37
00:01:31,487 --> 00:01:32,527
I won't.
38
00:01:35,787 --> 00:01:37,967
- [FLEABAG BREAKS WIND]
- For fuck's sake!
39
00:01:41,087 --> 00:01:43,538
I know people in this building,
anyone could come...
40
00:01:43,563 --> 00:01:44,963
[LIFT PINGS]
41
00:01:45,887 --> 00:01:47,711
- Hi, Claire.
- Hello, Leslie.
42
00:01:53,607 --> 00:01:55,563
[LESLIE SNIFFS]
43
00:01:56,767 --> 00:01:59,169
Oh, that's lovely. What is that?
44
00:02:02,447 --> 00:02:03,726
We have a load of vegetarians,
45
00:02:03,751 --> 00:02:05,474
so make sure it's clear which ones
have meat in them.
46
00:02:05,498 --> 00:02:06,433
Loves a crisis.
47
00:02:06,458 --> 00:02:07,891
We have a couple of waitresses
for the drinks,
48
00:02:07,916 --> 00:02:09,321
so if you could hand round the food...
49
00:02:09,346 --> 00:02:11,485
Put her in a quiet room with a nice
breeze, she'll have a panic attack.
50
00:02:11,510 --> 00:02:13,532
- Where is everyone?
- She's so happy.
51
00:02:13,556 --> 00:02:15,437
God, this is stressful.
52
00:02:16,087 --> 00:02:18,446
Don't be weird about how
big my office is.
53
00:02:18,447 --> 00:02:20,166
What the fuck?
54
00:02:20,167 --> 00:02:21,566
- I know.
- Are you a...?
55
00:02:21,567 --> 00:02:23,366
It's over the top, I know.
56
00:02:23,367 --> 00:02:24,806
Okay. Put them on the table.
57
00:02:24,807 --> 00:02:25,966
Not that table.
58
00:02:25,967 --> 00:02:28,286
- Ooh. You okay?
- Of course.
59
00:02:28,287 --> 00:02:30,486
It's just that it's a big night and
the Finnish partners
60
00:02:30,487 --> 00:02:32,606
are here, so it's all a bit...
61
00:02:32,607 --> 00:02:34,806
- Oh, check the award.
- Why?
62
00:02:34,807 --> 00:02:37,366
Just to make sure it's not pink or
anything horrifically female.
63
00:02:37,367 --> 00:02:38,406
She'll loathe that.
64
00:02:38,407 --> 00:02:40,446
Be careful with it.
It's worth thousands.
65
00:02:40,447 --> 00:02:42,206
- It's not pink.
- Good.
66
00:02:42,207 --> 00:02:43,846
It's perfect. It looks like a sperm.
67
00:02:43,847 --> 00:02:45,726
- Your hair looks nice.
- Shut up.
68
00:02:45,727 --> 00:02:46,766
Okay.
69
00:02:46,767 --> 00:02:48,526
Don't sit on that!
70
00:02:48,527 --> 00:02:50,366
Okay, put those on the posh plates.
71
00:02:50,367 --> 00:02:51,846
Put the award behind the microphone.
72
00:02:51,847 --> 00:02:52,887
Oh, and, um...
73
00:02:58,927 --> 00:03:00,446
...thank you.
74
00:03:00,447 --> 00:03:02,126
You've really, uh...
75
00:03:02,127 --> 00:03:03,207
Thank you.
76
00:03:05,847 --> 00:03:06,967
Don't play with that.
77
00:03:12,727 --> 00:03:14,927
Oh, that's heavy. Argh!
78
00:03:18,247 --> 00:03:20,886
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,
fuck, fuck, fuck...
79
00:03:20,887 --> 00:03:22,528
God...
80
00:03:23,647 --> 00:03:25,447
[BELL TOLLS]
81
00:03:33,647 --> 00:03:34,727
[SHE GASPS]
82
00:03:42,807 --> 00:03:44,166
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
83
00:03:44,167 --> 00:03:46,167
Excuse me, excuse me...
84
00:03:51,407 --> 00:03:52,447
[SHE SIGHS]
85
00:04:00,807 --> 00:04:01,929
Where have you been?
86
00:04:01,953 --> 00:04:03,350
Sorry, I had to get
the vegetarian bites.
87
00:04:03,375 --> 00:04:04,656
But it's all fine.
You're going to love them.
88
00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:06,246
You're sweating so much.
89
00:04:06,247 --> 00:04:07,766
- Sorry.
- It's attention grabbing.
90
00:04:07,767 --> 00:04:08,887
It's only on one side.
91
00:04:10,087 --> 00:04:13,006
Um, sorry, this is Sylvia.
92
00:04:13,007 --> 00:04:15,006
She's going to be presenting
the award, so...
93
00:04:15,007 --> 00:04:16,846
...when you hear me introduce her,
get on the stage.
94
00:04:16,847 --> 00:04:19,046
- Hi.
- Has this got shellfish in it?
95
00:04:19,047 --> 00:04:20,966
- No.
- Fine.
96
00:04:20,967 --> 00:04:23,846
Four CEOs have been fired.
Two are being taken to court.
97
00:04:23,847 --> 00:04:26,646
I mean, it's just sad.
We felt like a family.
98
00:04:26,647 --> 00:04:29,046
Yeah. Especially sad when you have
to tell your family not to
99
00:04:29,047 --> 00:04:30,966
touch each other up by the photocopier.
100
00:04:30,967 --> 00:04:32,247
[THEY LAUGH]
101
00:04:33,327 --> 00:04:35,526
- Stop making jokes.
- I'm sorry, I can't help it.
102
00:04:35,527 --> 00:04:37,686
Well, you can. Oh, Belinda's coming.
103
00:04:37,687 --> 00:04:39,366
Don't speak to Belinda.
104
00:04:39,367 --> 00:04:42,446
- Hello, Claire.
- Hello, Belinda.
105
00:04:42,447 --> 00:04:44,326
- God, you're tasteful.
- Mmm.
106
00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:45,367
Oh, are these meaty?
107
00:04:50,927 --> 00:04:52,440
Say something.
108
00:04:52,464 --> 00:04:53,642
No, I think they have courgette in them.
109
00:04:53,667 --> 00:04:55,646
Oh, I love courgette.
110
00:04:55,647 --> 00:04:58,979
You can treat them appallingly
and they still grow.
111
00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:05,566
- She seems lovely.
- Yeah, she's great.
112
00:05:05,567 --> 00:05:08,366
- So, who are you so nervous about?
- I'm not nervous.
113
00:05:08,367 --> 00:05:09,526
I'm being completely...
114
00:05:09,527 --> 00:05:10,646
Claire!
115
00:05:10,647 --> 00:05:12,144
Oh! Hi!
116
00:05:12,169 --> 00:05:15,286
Oh! God, sorry.
I'm so glad you could come.
117
00:05:15,287 --> 00:05:17,366
Of course. It's my job.
118
00:05:17,367 --> 00:05:19,316
This is my catering. She's the sister.
119
00:05:19,340 --> 00:05:20,300
Hi.
120
00:05:20,301 --> 00:05:23,286
I ate a sausage over there
thinking it was a prune.
121
00:05:23,287 --> 00:05:26,326
15 years of vegetarianism, gone!
Like bang, bang!
122
00:05:26,327 --> 00:05:27,806
[THEY LAUGH]
123
00:05:27,807 --> 00:05:29,000
We do actually call them bangers.
124
00:05:29,025 --> 00:05:30,886
Ah, that's funny!
125
00:05:30,887 --> 00:05:32,390
Yes, it was.
126
00:05:33,847 --> 00:05:35,606
So, how do you two know each other?
127
00:05:35,607 --> 00:05:37,286
BOTH: We are partners...
128
00:05:37,287 --> 00:05:38,499
- Business partners.
- Yes.
129
00:05:38,524 --> 00:05:40,110
She's been working with me in Finland.
130
00:05:40,134 --> 00:05:41,046
- Yes!
- And...
131
00:05:41,071 --> 00:05:43,206
- We don't get to see each other that much.
- No, exactly.
132
00:05:43,207 --> 00:05:44,806
- I'm a big fan.
- I'm a huge...
133
00:05:44,807 --> 00:05:46,593
Thank you... admirer.
134
00:05:49,607 --> 00:05:51,966
I'm going to get a drink.
Do you want anything?
135
00:05:51,967 --> 00:05:53,806
Oh, champagne, please.
136
00:05:53,807 --> 00:05:55,526
Oh, off the wagon?
137
00:05:55,527 --> 00:05:57,166
Just when I'm with you.
138
00:05:57,167 --> 00:05:58,646
[THEY LAUGH]
139
00:05:58,647 --> 00:06:00,926
Let's go fucking crazy tonight, then.
140
00:06:00,927 --> 00:06:02,686
Hmm?
141
00:06:02,711 --> 00:06:05,917
- What did you say?
- No, no, I... I was...
142
00:06:05,942 --> 00:06:07,886
- No, what did you say?
- Oh, just...
143
00:06:07,887 --> 00:06:11,606
I just said, "Let's go
fuck like crazy tonight."
144
00:06:12,167 --> 00:06:13,446
Oh, God.
145
00:06:13,447 --> 00:06:14,807
Okay!
146
00:06:17,567 --> 00:06:18,927
[NERVOUS LAUGHTER]
147
00:06:24,807 --> 00:06:27,467
- Shut up.
- Oh, my God!
148
00:06:27,492 --> 00:06:30,547
He is a very good businessman.
He's just socially sort of...
149
00:06:30,572 --> 00:06:32,149
- What's...?
- Shut up.
150
00:06:32,174 --> 00:06:33,303
Claire!
151
00:06:33,328 --> 00:06:35,080
Please don't, please don't.
I can't cope.
152
00:06:35,104 --> 00:06:37,104
- Okay?
- Okay.
153
00:06:37,167 --> 00:06:38,407
What's his name?
154
00:06:40,047 --> 00:06:41,327
What's his name?
155
00:06:42,767 --> 00:06:44,047
Klare.
156
00:06:46,167 --> 00:06:48,686
What?
157
00:06:48,687 --> 00:06:50,846
His name is Klare.
158
00:06:50,847 --> 00:06:52,287
Don't.
159
00:06:53,503 --> 00:06:56,967
Oh, God, I have to announce.
Okay, mingle, but don't talk to anyone.
160
00:06:56,992 --> 00:06:58,673
- Okay.
- I'm not in love with him.
161
00:06:58,697 --> 00:07:00,415
Okay.
162
00:07:06,047 --> 00:07:10,460
Hi, everyone. I am very proud
to announce the nominees
163
00:07:10,485 --> 00:07:14,460
for the Women in Business Awards,
sponsored by us here at Hurbots.
164
00:07:14,485 --> 00:07:19,453
Amongst our exceptional women,
we have Georgina Franks.
165
00:07:19,508 --> 00:07:21,663
[APPLAUSE]
166
00:07:21,887 --> 00:07:23,483
Belinda Friers.
167
00:07:25,647 --> 00:07:28,046
And another extraordinary woman...
168
00:07:28,047 --> 00:07:29,687
...Klare Korhonen.
169
00:07:32,527 --> 00:07:35,526
Sorry, I think there's
been a mistake, here.
170
00:07:35,527 --> 00:07:36,927
Elizabeth Sawkin.
171
00:07:40,487 --> 00:07:42,086
Congratulations to you all.
172
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:45,433
Have a wonderful evening.
We'll be presenting the award very soon.
173
00:07:45,458 --> 00:07:48,177
I'm going to introduce Sylvia,
who's going to introduce Belinda.
174
00:07:48,202 --> 00:07:50,366
When you hear me introducing Sylvia,
get her on stage.
175
00:07:50,367 --> 00:07:52,566
- It has to go like cockwork.
- Like what?
176
00:07:52,567 --> 00:07:54,089
Cockwork.
177
00:07:54,113 --> 00:07:55,366
Claire, your brain is
somewhere else right now.
178
00:07:55,367 --> 00:07:57,126
Sylvia, go!
179
00:07:57,127 --> 00:07:59,046
Sylvia!
180
00:07:59,047 --> 00:08:01,047
[SHE VOMITS]
181
00:08:04,487 --> 00:08:06,616
Crap.
182
00:08:06,641 --> 00:08:10,406
A huge thanks to Matthew, Mark, Luke
and John for coming up
183
00:08:10,431 --> 00:08:13,397
with this award. And to LinkedIn
for connecting us all
184
00:08:13,422 --> 00:08:14,920
this evening and beyond.
185
00:08:14,921 --> 00:08:18,440
I am so excited to introduce
Sylvia Hamburg,
186
00:08:18,441 --> 00:08:20,640
this year's winner of Women Who Work,
187
00:08:20,641 --> 00:08:24,040
who will announce this year's
Best Woman in Business.
188
00:08:24,041 --> 00:08:25,520
Sylvia.
189
00:08:25,521 --> 00:08:26,841
What a legend!
190
00:08:37,121 --> 00:08:38,681
I'll do it!
191
00:08:39,761 --> 00:08:42,120
I can do it.
192
00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:46,204
I'm sorry,
it appears that Sylvia is busy,
193
00:08:46,229 --> 00:08:48,681
which shouldn't come
as a surprise, really.
194
00:08:50,618 --> 00:08:54,280
I-It's been a big year for business...
195
00:08:54,281 --> 00:08:56,080
...particularly women in business.
196
00:08:56,081 --> 00:08:59,201
Men have been pretty hands-on
the past few decades.
197
00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:00,664
[LAUGHS]
198
00:09:01,321 --> 00:09:04,600
I'd like to thank all
the brilliant men and women
199
00:09:04,601 --> 00:09:06,840
for supporting each other here
at Hurbots.
200
00:09:06,841 --> 00:09:08,720
We're a family, really.
201
00:09:08,721 --> 00:09:11,160
And if we've learned anything
during the past 12 months,
202
00:09:11,161 --> 00:09:13,360
it's that family really shouldn't
touch each other up
203
00:09:13,361 --> 00:09:14,881
next to the photocopier.
204
00:09:14,905 --> 00:09:17,051
[LAUGHTER]
205
00:09:18,961 --> 00:09:23,582
I am honoured to present
this award to this year's
206
00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:25,984
Best Woman in Business...
207
00:09:26,361 --> 00:09:28,006
...Belinda Friers.
208
00:09:28,031 --> 00:09:30,162
Fuck's sake!
209
00:09:30,186 --> 00:09:32,272
[APPLAUSE]
210
00:09:53,041 --> 00:09:54,681
Thank you, thank you.
211
00:09:55,921 --> 00:09:57,321
Well, um...
212
00:09:59,921 --> 00:10:01,819
Well, I was going to say
this is a bit on the nose,
213
00:10:01,844 --> 00:10:03,787
- but she doesn't seem to have one.
- [LAUGHTER]
214
00:10:04,161 --> 00:10:06,120
- What were you thinking?
- It'll be fine.
215
00:10:06,121 --> 00:10:09,522
It's not fine.
I awarded her with a pair of tits.
216
00:10:10,241 --> 00:10:12,520
- Chase her down.
- Chase her down?
217
00:10:12,521 --> 00:10:14,080
It's a stolen piece of art.
218
00:10:14,081 --> 00:10:16,000
I will deal with the photographer.
219
00:10:16,001 --> 00:10:19,114
Claire! Oh, my God! You were brilliant!
220
00:10:19,139 --> 00:10:20,400
Thank you, Klare.
221
00:10:20,401 --> 00:10:21,720
I love the joke.
222
00:10:21,721 --> 00:10:24,440
Oh, well, I didn't think
it was that funny.
223
00:10:24,441 --> 00:10:26,760
- Can you go, my love?!
- I'm just going to...
224
00:10:26,761 --> 00:10:29,160
- Take the stairs.
- Okay.
225
00:10:29,161 --> 00:10:31,321
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
226
00:10:48,801 --> 00:10:50,280
I'm trained in martial arts.
227
00:10:50,281 --> 00:10:52,360
It's just the basics, but it is enough.
228
00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:55,015
- I work at Harbots.
- Hurbots.
229
00:10:56,001 --> 00:10:58,480
Yes, I ate a courgette off your tray.
230
00:10:58,481 --> 00:11:00,640
- Yeah, it was delicious.
- Thank you.
231
00:11:00,641 --> 00:11:01,961
What do you want?
232
00:11:02,961 --> 00:11:05,360
That.
233
00:11:05,361 --> 00:11:08,040
I need to take your award back.
234
00:11:08,041 --> 00:11:09,120
Why?
235
00:11:09,121 --> 00:11:10,986
It's a stolen piece of art.
It's not really an award.
236
00:11:11,011 --> 00:11:12,800
It's all my fault. I can explain.
237
00:11:12,801 --> 00:11:14,560
Is it a long story?
238
00:11:14,561 --> 00:11:15,961
Sort of.
239
00:11:17,881 --> 00:11:21,080
And she still doesn't know you have it?
240
00:11:21,081 --> 00:11:24,480
That's glorious! I think
you did exactly the right thing.
241
00:11:24,481 --> 00:11:26,880
I think you're the only person
who thinks that.
242
00:11:26,881 --> 00:11:28,280
God!
243
00:11:28,281 --> 00:11:29,960
Women's awards.
244
00:11:29,961 --> 00:11:31,320
Congratulations.
245
00:11:31,321 --> 00:11:34,600
Oh! It's infantilising bollocks.
246
00:11:34,601 --> 00:11:36,434
What? Don't you think it's good that...?
247
00:11:36,459 --> 00:11:38,284
No, no, it's ghettoising.
248
00:11:38,309 --> 00:11:40,551
It's a subsection of success.
249
00:11:41,521 --> 00:11:44,680
Ah, it's a fucking
children's table of awards.
250
00:11:44,681 --> 00:11:46,680
Why did you go?
251
00:11:46,681 --> 00:11:48,520
Because I'd be an arsehole not to.
252
00:11:48,521 --> 00:11:49,800
Miss Friers.
253
00:11:49,801 --> 00:11:51,001
Thank you, darling.
254
00:11:52,641 --> 00:11:53,960
Gosh, she's hot.
255
00:11:53,961 --> 00:11:55,280
Yeah.
256
00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:56,720
Are you a lesbian?
257
00:11:56,721 --> 00:11:58,200
Not strictly.
258
00:11:58,201 --> 00:11:59,800
- You?
- Mm.
259
00:11:59,801 --> 00:12:01,599
- Do you like old films?
- Some.
260
00:12:01,624 --> 00:12:03,533
And what's your favourite period film?
261
00:12:04,921 --> 00:12:06,401
Carrie.
262
00:12:06,753 --> 00:12:09,041
[BOTH LAUGH]
263
00:12:09,103 --> 00:12:10,960
God!
264
00:12:10,961 --> 00:12:13,640
God, you are a tonic.
265
00:12:13,641 --> 00:12:15,560
What do you do?
Are you a woman in business?
266
00:12:15,561 --> 00:12:18,574
- I run a cafe.
- Oh! Good for you.
267
00:12:19,721 --> 00:12:21,400
Did you make the canapes?
268
00:12:21,401 --> 00:12:23,261
No, actually. I stole them.
269
00:12:26,441 --> 00:12:28,280
- How old are you?
- 58.
270
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:29,751
- And you?
- 33.
271
00:12:29,775 --> 00:12:30,851
Oh.
272
00:12:30,876 --> 00:12:33,600
- Don't worry. It does get better.
- Do you promise?
273
00:12:33,601 --> 00:12:35,360
I promise.
274
00:12:35,361 --> 00:12:40,303
Listen, I was in an aeroplane
the other day and I realised...
275
00:12:40,328 --> 00:12:43,679
Well, I... I mean, I've been longing
to say this out loud.
276
00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:49,182
Women are born with pain built in.
277
00:12:49,761 --> 00:12:51,800
It's our physical destiny.
278
00:12:51,801 --> 00:12:55,481
Period pains, sore boobs,
childbirth, you know.
279
00:12:56,641 --> 00:13:00,240
We carry it within ourselves
throughout our lives.
280
00:13:00,241 --> 00:13:01,600
Men don't.
281
00:13:01,601 --> 00:13:03,120
They have to seek it out.
282
00:13:03,121 --> 00:13:05,160
They invent all these gods
and demons and things
283
00:13:05,161 --> 00:13:07,080
just so they can feel
guilty about things,
284
00:13:07,105 --> 00:13:10,080
which is something we do
very well on our own.
285
00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:13,280
And then they create wars,
so they can feel things
286
00:13:13,281 --> 00:13:15,224
and touch each other,
and when there aren't any wars
287
00:13:15,248 --> 00:13:16,340
they can play rugby.
288
00:13:16,365 --> 00:13:20,080
And we have it all
going on in here, inside.
289
00:13:20,081 --> 00:13:24,055
We have pain on a cycle for years
and years and years
290
00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:28,180
and then, just when you feel
you are making peace with it all,
291
00:13:28,205 --> 00:13:29,760
what happens?
292
00:13:29,761 --> 00:13:31,040
The menopause comes.
293
00:13:31,041 --> 00:13:34,007
The fucking menopause comes and it is...
294
00:13:35,741 --> 00:13:37,981
...the most...
295
00:13:39,001 --> 00:13:41,939
...wonderful fucking thing in the world!
296
00:13:41,964 --> 00:13:45,323
And, yes, your entire
pelvic floor crumbles
297
00:13:45,348 --> 00:13:49,108
and you get fucking hot
and no-one cares, but then...
298
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,880
...you're free.
299
00:13:52,240 --> 00:13:57,371
No longer a slave,
no longer a machine, with parts.
300
00:13:58,121 --> 00:14:00,628
You're just a person in business.
301
00:14:01,561 --> 00:14:03,520
Oh.
302
00:14:03,521 --> 00:14:04,960
I was told it was horrendous.
303
00:14:04,961 --> 00:14:07,680
It is horrendous,
but then it's magnificent.
304
00:14:07,681 --> 00:14:09,241
Something to look forward to.
305
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:16,120
You better get back to that party.
306
00:14:16,121 --> 00:14:18,080
- Your party.
- Mm.
307
00:14:18,081 --> 00:14:21,080
It is not a party
until someone flirts with you.
308
00:14:21,081 --> 00:14:23,920
And that's the only really
shit thing about getting older,
309
00:14:23,921 --> 00:14:26,640
is that people don't flirt
with you anymore.
310
00:14:26,641 --> 00:14:28,840
Not really. Not with danger.
311
00:14:28,841 --> 00:14:31,307
I miss walking into a room
and not knowing,
312
00:14:31,332 --> 00:14:34,920
and there's a sort of energy, a dare.
313
00:14:34,921 --> 00:14:37,309
Do not take that for granted.
314
00:14:38,881 --> 00:14:42,676
There is nothing more exciting
than a room full of people.
315
00:14:43,321 --> 00:14:45,200
Yeah, except most people are...
316
00:14:45,201 --> 00:14:46,481
What?
317
00:14:48,321 --> 00:14:49,561
...shit.
318
00:14:51,321 --> 00:14:53,200
Look at me.
319
00:14:53,201 --> 00:14:55,600
Listen.
320
00:14:55,601 --> 00:14:57,561
People are all we've got.
321
00:14:59,041 --> 00:15:00,896
People are all we've got.
322
00:15:00,921 --> 00:15:04,304
So grab the night by its nipples
and go and flirt with someone.
323
00:15:05,641 --> 00:15:07,788
No, that's not what I meant!
324
00:15:12,961 --> 00:15:14,480
Oh.
325
00:15:14,692 --> 00:15:16,564
I wish you were my type.
326
00:15:17,601 --> 00:15:20,227
Take this tart back to my party
327
00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:22,200
and go and find someone to
actually do that with.
328
00:15:22,201 --> 00:15:23,800
- I want to do it with you.
- No.
329
00:15:23,801 --> 00:15:25,805
- Why not?
- Honestly?
330
00:15:25,829 --> 00:15:26,985
Yeah.
331
00:15:27,010 --> 00:15:28,800
I can't be arsed, darling.
332
00:15:28,801 --> 00:15:32,657
I'm going to go back to my room
and have one more martini,
333
00:15:32,682 --> 00:15:35,626
and if you need anything, call me.
334
00:15:35,651 --> 00:15:36,931
Anything.
335
00:15:38,362 --> 00:15:41,041
You can have whoever
you want at your age.
336
00:15:41,066 --> 00:15:42,505
Except the Best Woman in Business.
337
00:15:42,530 --> 00:15:45,699
Well, that's just because
she's exhausted.
338
00:15:46,730 --> 00:15:48,009
33 isn't exactly...
339
00:15:48,010 --> 00:15:50,529
And what had Jesus done by 33?
340
00:15:50,530 --> 00:15:52,009
- Died?
- Exactly!
341
00:15:52,010 --> 00:15:53,690
So get out there and flirt.
342
00:16:04,124 --> 00:16:05,985
- Here you are!
- Oh, hi!
343
00:16:06,010 --> 00:16:07,390
Thought you might be snogging Finland.
344
00:16:07,415 --> 00:16:10,369
Ha-ha! No, just sorting a few things!
345
00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:11,529
I got her!
346
00:16:11,530 --> 00:16:12,729
Oh!
347
00:16:12,730 --> 00:16:14,449
And Belinda gave me her card.
348
00:16:14,450 --> 00:16:15,730
Oh, that's great!
349
00:16:16,850 --> 00:16:18,889
- What?
- Nothing.
350
00:16:18,890 --> 00:16:20,209
She's furious.
351
00:16:20,210 --> 00:16:21,449
Really?
352
00:16:21,450 --> 00:16:23,289
Yes! It was a great night.
353
00:16:23,290 --> 00:16:26,959
Everything went smoothly in the end,
and everyone loved the canapes.
354
00:16:26,984 --> 00:16:28,343
Really? I'm a dead woman.
355
00:16:28,368 --> 00:16:30,185
- Really?
- Yes!
356
00:16:30,210 --> 00:16:31,537
Really?
357
00:16:31,585 --> 00:16:33,504
Yes! It was a great night.
358
00:16:33,505 --> 00:16:35,464
She's going to blow.
I just have a feeling...
359
00:16:35,465 --> 00:16:36,904
I would've come up with my own joke
360
00:16:36,905 --> 00:16:38,944
if you hadn't put that one in my head.
361
00:16:38,945 --> 00:16:41,064
I have my own jokes.
362
00:16:41,065 --> 00:16:43,584
I am funny, I am interesting.
363
00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:45,557
I knew I shouldn't have
brought you here.
364
00:16:45,582 --> 00:16:47,496
- What do you mean, interesting?
- You just think you can do
365
00:16:47,521 --> 00:16:50,984
whatever you like, say whatever
you like, steal whatever you like,
366
00:16:50,985 --> 00:16:53,073
- kiss whoever you like.
- He kissed me!
367
00:16:53,098 --> 00:16:55,104
Oh, I know.
368
00:16:55,105 --> 00:16:56,493
You know?!
369
00:16:56,518 --> 00:16:57,593
Then why have we been spending
370
00:16:57,618 --> 00:16:58,697
- ...the entire...?
- Because you're fine!
371
00:16:58,721 --> 00:16:59,704
You'll always be fine.
372
00:16:59,705 --> 00:17:02,671
You'll always be interesting,
with your quirky cafe
373
00:17:02,696 --> 00:17:04,144
and your dead best friend.
374
00:17:04,145 --> 00:17:06,265
You just make me feel like I've failed.
375
00:17:09,287 --> 00:17:10,655
Claire...
376
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:13,701
If you mention the size
of my office, I will scream.
377
00:17:15,505 --> 00:17:17,020
[SHE WHISPERS]: It's huge.
378
00:17:21,025 --> 00:17:22,785
I just thought we were hanging out.
379
00:17:23,891 --> 00:17:25,531
Just as friends.
380
00:17:26,665 --> 00:17:28,184
We're not friends.
381
00:17:28,185 --> 00:17:29,625
We are sisters.
382
00:17:31,825 --> 00:17:33,625
Get your own friends.
383
00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:39,719
[HOLY MUSIC]
384
00:17:46,025 --> 00:17:48,305
[DOORBELL RINGS]
385
00:17:53,425 --> 00:17:54,824
Oh. Hi.
386
00:17:54,825 --> 00:17:55,954
Oh, sorry.
387
00:17:55,979 --> 00:17:57,086
I didn't have your number
388
00:17:57,111 --> 00:17:58,891
and you just said come round
any time with G&Ts.
389
00:17:58,916 --> 00:18:01,184
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. I just...
390
00:18:01,262 --> 00:18:03,551
This is a bit embarrassing,
but recently I've been really
391
00:18:03,575 --> 00:18:05,934
enjoying going to bed at 9:30.
392
00:18:05,935 --> 00:18:07,666
- Oh, shit.
- No, no, it's fine.
393
00:18:07,691 --> 00:18:09,142
I can see G&Ts! Are you okay?
394
00:18:09,167 --> 00:18:11,806
Yeah, yeah, I just...
Just fancied a drink and a priest
395
00:18:11,807 --> 00:18:13,366
and a chat, maybe.
396
00:18:13,367 --> 00:18:14,686
Oh, that's my whole job.
397
00:18:14,687 --> 00:18:16,166
We'll have to be quiet, though,
398
00:18:16,167 --> 00:18:19,874
because Pam's a bit of
a sound tyrant in the evenings.
399
00:18:19,899 --> 00:18:22,247
- Pam lives here?
- Yeah, Pam lives here.
400
00:18:26,247 --> 00:18:28,326
- So I read your book.
- Okay. Great.
401
00:18:28,327 --> 00:18:29,479
Well, it's got some great twists.
402
00:18:29,503 --> 00:18:30,941
- True.
- But I just...
403
00:18:30,942 --> 00:18:32,782
- I couldn't help but notice...
- Come on, just spit it out!
404
00:18:32,807 --> 00:18:35,966
- just one or two little inconsistences.
- Okay, sure.
405
00:18:35,967 --> 00:18:38,446
So, the world was made in seven days.
406
00:18:38,447 --> 00:18:43,267
And on the first day, light came and
then a few days later the sun came?
407
00:18:44,887 --> 00:18:46,126
Yeah, that's ridiculous.
408
00:18:46,127 --> 00:18:47,766
But you believe that?
409
00:18:47,767 --> 00:18:51,069
It's not a fact, it's poetry.
It's moral code.
410
00:18:51,094 --> 00:18:54,624
It's for interpretation to help
us work out God's plan for us.
411
00:18:54,671 --> 00:18:56,522
What's God's plan for you?
412
00:18:56,547 --> 00:19:01,619
I believe God meant for me
to love people in a different way.
413
00:19:01,644 --> 00:19:04,470
I believe I'm supposed
to love people as a father.
414
00:19:05,247 --> 00:19:07,046
We can arrange that.
415
00:19:07,047 --> 00:19:08,486
A father of many.
416
00:19:08,487 --> 00:19:09,726
I'll go up to three.
417
00:19:09,727 --> 00:19:11,137
- It's not going to happen.
- Two, then.
418
00:19:11,176 --> 00:19:12,371
Okay, two.
419
00:19:15,466 --> 00:19:17,825
- [LOUD THUMP]
- Oh, shit. Pam. She's not happy.
420
00:19:17,850 --> 00:19:19,641
[HE WHISPERS]: We should go outside.
421
00:19:23,210 --> 00:19:24,585
Do you think I should become a Catholic?
422
00:19:24,609 --> 00:19:25,846
No, don't do that.
423
00:19:25,847 --> 00:19:28,966
I like that you believe
in a meaningless existence.
424
00:19:28,967 --> 00:19:32,606
And you're good for me.
You make me question my faith.
425
00:19:32,607 --> 00:19:35,046
- And?
- I've never felt closer to God.
426
00:19:35,047 --> 00:19:36,683
[LAUGHING]Fuck you!
427
00:19:36,708 --> 00:19:38,286
- [RUSTLING]
- What was that?
428
00:19:38,287 --> 00:19:39,568
It wasn't a fox, was it?
429
00:19:39,592 --> 00:19:40,652
- I don't know.
- Is it a fox?
430
00:19:40,677 --> 00:19:42,206
Shine something. Boo! Baa!
431
00:19:42,207 --> 00:19:44,097
- Oh, God. I bet it's a fox.
- Oh, God!
432
00:19:44,122 --> 00:19:46,686
No, I'm not being funny,
foxes have been after me for years.
433
00:19:46,687 --> 00:19:48,446
It's like they have a pact or something.
434
00:19:48,447 --> 00:19:51,966
I'm not kidding. I was on a
toilet, a toilet of a train,
435
00:19:51,967 --> 00:19:53,956
and when the train stopped,
a fucking fox tried to get
436
00:19:53,981 --> 00:19:56,970
through the window of a train!
Its face was in the window!
437
00:19:56,995 --> 00:19:59,468
And once, when I was at a monastery,
438
00:19:59,493 --> 00:20:01,326
I woke up just feeling a bit
weird, like there might be
439
00:20:01,327 --> 00:20:04,679
a fox about, and a fox
was sitting underneath my window
440
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:06,994
looking up like this,
pointing at me like,
441
00:20:07,019 --> 00:20:09,967
"You, we're watching you.
We're having you."
442
00:20:12,607 --> 00:20:14,326
Lucky God got there first.
443
00:20:14,327 --> 00:20:16,377
- Well, yeah.
- You could be a fox boy by now.
444
00:20:16,402 --> 00:20:18,282
And we all know what happened to them!
445
00:20:21,807 --> 00:20:23,287
- You okay?
- I'm okay.
446
00:20:25,447 --> 00:20:26,685
Do you think I'm mad?
447
00:20:26,927 --> 00:20:29,271
Because of the fox thing
or because of the God thing?
448
00:20:29,607 --> 00:20:31,287
You're obsessed.
449
00:20:31,311 --> 00:20:33,006
[CLEARS THROAT]
450
00:20:33,007 --> 00:20:35,046
Do you ever have doubts?
451
00:20:35,047 --> 00:20:37,866
Yes, of course, every day.
It's part of the deal.
452
00:20:39,087 --> 00:20:41,233
I just don't think I could do it.
453
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:43,108
Especially the...
454
00:20:45,866 --> 00:20:47,416
What?
455
00:20:47,619 --> 00:20:49,703
- ...celibacy and...
- Oh, it's a fucking fox!
456
00:20:49,728 --> 00:20:51,080
- [RUSTLING]
- Chill out about the fox!
457
00:20:51,105 --> 00:20:52,142
Ooh! Sorry.
458
00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:54,287
I just don't know
what they want from me!
459
00:20:56,287 --> 00:20:57,966
Sorry.
460
00:20:58,287 --> 00:20:59,724
Celibacy.
461
00:20:59,846 --> 00:21:01,006
Go.
462
00:21:02,127 --> 00:21:03,607
I just...
463
00:21:04,638 --> 00:21:06,793
I couldn't give up sex forever.
464
00:21:07,908 --> 00:21:09,348
It's just too...
465
00:21:10,555 --> 00:21:12,199
It's too...
466
00:21:13,007 --> 00:21:18,153
Celibacy is a lot less
complicated than...
467
00:21:18,271 --> 00:21:20,333
romantic relationships.
468
00:21:20,407 --> 00:21:23,153
What if you meet someone you like?
469
00:21:23,247 --> 00:21:26,170
I talk and drink and laugh
and give them Bibles,
470
00:21:26,248 --> 00:21:28,287
and hope they eventually leave me alone.
471
00:21:29,007 --> 00:21:31,047
What if you meet someone you love?
472
00:21:34,367 --> 00:21:35,832
We're not going to have sex.
473
00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:44,277
I know that's what you think
you want from me, but it's not.
474
00:21:45,167 --> 00:21:47,445
It won't bring any good.
475
00:21:47,727 --> 00:21:50,062
- Well, it might...
- It won't.
476
00:21:50,327 --> 00:21:52,734
I've been there many times.
477
00:21:52,847 --> 00:21:55,726
Before I found this. Many, many times.
478
00:21:55,727 --> 00:21:57,647
How many times?
479
00:22:01,807 --> 00:22:03,607
Many.
480
00:22:13,977 --> 00:22:16,616
I'd really like to
be your friend, though.
481
00:22:16,727 --> 00:22:18,328
I'd like to be your friend, too.
482
00:22:20,807 --> 00:22:22,367
We'll last a week.
483
00:22:23,745 --> 00:22:25,345
What was that?
484
00:22:27,087 --> 00:22:28,676
What?
485
00:22:28,767 --> 00:22:31,004
Where did...? Where did you just go?
486
00:22:31,487 --> 00:22:33,086
What?
487
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:36,137
You just went somewhere.
488
00:22:36,723 --> 00:22:38,847
There. There.
489
00:22:40,996 --> 00:22:42,596
Where did you just go?
490
00:22:43,881 --> 00:22:45,401
Nowhere.
491
00:22:50,327 --> 00:22:51,567
Okay.
492
00:22:58,533 --> 00:23:00,413
[THEY SCREAM]
493
00:23:00,437 --> 00:23:05,437
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494
00:23:05,487 --> 00:23:10,037
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