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1
00:00:01,162 --> 00:00:04,657
Uh, this is Louis Huang
calling again for Kenny Rogers.
2
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He purchased a 50%
ownership in my restaurant
3
00:00:07,033 --> 00:00:08,633
from Michael Bolton.
4
00:00:09,569 --> 00:00:11,636
Ah. Right in the pleat.
5
00:00:11,738 --> 00:00:13,304
Ugh! I don't understand
6
00:00:13,373 --> 00:00:15,640
why I can't get Kenny
Rogers on the phone.
7
00:00:15,708 --> 00:00:16,974
Have you tried calling Dolly Parton?
8
00:00:17,076 --> 00:00:18,009
Of course I have.
9
00:00:18,077 --> 00:00:19,410
I've spoken to Dolly like seven times.
10
00:00:19,479 --> 00:00:20,811
She was nice, but no help.
11
00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:23,781
Eddie! Evan!
Hurry up so you can eat and leave!
12
00:00:24,178 --> 00:00:26,408
I can't wait for you boys
to go back to school.
13
00:00:26,513 --> 00:00:28,120
There's something about you guys.
14
00:00:28,187 --> 00:00:31,655
Over time... it's fatiguing.
15
00:00:31,757 --> 00:00:33,056
It's gonna be a great year.
16
00:00:33,125 --> 00:00:34,324
Now that Eddie's in high school,
17
00:00:34,393 --> 00:00:36,426
I'm gonna have middle
school all to myself.
18
00:00:36,495 --> 00:00:38,395
My whole life, I haven't been
able to stretch out my arms
19
00:00:38,464 --> 00:00:39,563
without hitting a brother.
20
00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:41,531
But look at me now!
21
00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:43,600
Hey. I can touch dad's head.
22
00:00:43,669 --> 00:00:45,268
My wingspan has doubled this summer.
23
00:00:45,304 --> 00:00:47,204
All you boys are growing up.
24
00:00:47,746 --> 00:00:49,672
Booty Man, reporting for 9th grade!
25
00:00:49,741 --> 00:00:52,642
Am I talkin' my booty?
Am I talkin' your booty?
26
00:00:52,711 --> 00:00:55,245
Get to know me and find out.
27
00:00:56,982 --> 00:00:59,282
S04E02
First Day
28
00:01:10,871 --> 00:01:12,317
sync and corrected by ninh
www.addic7ed.com
29
00:01:12,665 --> 00:01:13,963
Eddie,
you can't wear that hat to school.
30
00:01:14,065 --> 00:01:15,398
- Take it off.
- No way.
31
00:01:15,433 --> 00:01:16,466
I'm starting high school.
32
00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:17,800
The first impression's everything.
33
00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:19,536
No Booty Man! The hat goes!
34
00:01:19,638 --> 00:01:21,437
Ugh! Fine!
35
00:01:21,917 --> 00:01:24,302
But the day I get my own apartment,
36
00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:26,043
I'm wearing this hat to sign the lease.
37
00:01:26,138 --> 00:01:27,910
Great. Do that.
38
00:01:28,801 --> 00:01:32,548
This tension right here is why
I took breakfast in my room.
39
00:01:32,650 --> 00:01:33,716
We should go.
40
00:01:33,784 --> 00:01:36,418
Don't want to be late to
the bus on the first day.
41
00:01:36,844 --> 00:01:38,387
What's that on your face?
42
00:01:40,991 --> 00:01:43,058
It's an irritated clogged pore.
43
00:01:43,127 --> 00:01:45,461
Process your pimple on the move,
brother.
44
00:01:45,529 --> 00:01:46,995
The bus waits for no one.
45
00:01:54,182 --> 00:01:55,702
No one stops Booty Man.
46
00:01:57,441 --> 00:01:58,507
Well, if I wasn't sure
47
00:01:58,609 --> 00:01:59,942
I liked girls before,
48
00:02:00,481 --> 00:02:01,310
this confirms it.
49
00:02:03,347 --> 00:02:04,646
Uh, hey,
50
00:02:04,748 --> 00:02:06,214
are those your friends?
51
00:02:06,316 --> 00:02:08,091
Ex-friends, you mean.
52
00:02:09,019 --> 00:02:11,219
Enjoy the bus, losers!
53
00:02:11,321 --> 00:02:13,154
What does your hat say? "Boo"?
54
00:02:13,257 --> 00:02:14,189
What are you, a ghost?
55
00:02:14,291 --> 00:02:15,891
Ooh, I'm scared!
56
00:02:15,993 --> 00:02:17,425
It says "Booty"! You should know.
57
00:02:17,527 --> 00:02:19,461
You have your head up your own!
58
00:02:19,563 --> 00:02:20,996
What did you think of that?
59
00:02:21,098 --> 00:02:22,916
I cannot believe you
guys are still fighting.
60
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:24,733
Those guys wanted to drop me
61
00:02:24,801 --> 00:02:26,868
the second they thought I was
going to a different school.
62
00:02:26,970 --> 00:02:28,098
Screw them!
63
00:02:28,150 --> 00:02:29,227
I got my Booty hat.
64
00:02:29,311 --> 00:02:31,546
I got my girl Alison. And I've got you.
65
00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:32,875
Oh, yeah, no.
66
00:02:32,977 --> 00:02:34,910
You're a freshman.
I can't be seen with you.
67
00:02:35,451 --> 00:02:36,545
In fact...
68
00:02:38,349 --> 00:02:40,649
you need to get out here
before anyone sees us together.
69
00:02:40,751 --> 00:02:42,351
But we're nine blocks from school.
70
00:02:42,419 --> 00:02:43,485
Better hurry, then.
71
00:02:49,631 --> 00:02:51,193
See you at home for dinner!
72
00:02:51,795 --> 00:02:53,094
My older brother.
73
00:02:53,196 --> 00:02:54,162
He sees a therapist,
74
00:02:54,264 --> 00:02:55,563
but we're not allowed
75
00:02:55,665 --> 00:02:56,765
to talk about it.
76
00:02:59,403 --> 00:03:00,735
Can you still see it?
77
00:03:00,804 --> 00:03:01,870
If anyone asks, I'm gonna say
78
00:03:01,912 --> 00:03:03,052
I nicked myself shaving.
79
00:03:03,147 --> 00:03:04,086
When the day comes,
80
00:03:04,170 --> 00:03:05,563
I'm going electric.
81
00:03:05,643 --> 00:03:06,942
That three-headed Norelco...
82
00:03:07,044 --> 00:03:09,978
It lifts, then it slices.
83
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:11,213
Have a good first day.
84
00:03:20,431 --> 00:03:21,223
Evan?
85
00:03:21,325 --> 00:03:22,499
You're on the wrong bus.
86
00:03:22,647 --> 00:03:23,525
I'm not.
87
00:03:23,627 --> 00:03:24,760
I skipped 5th grade.
88
00:03:24,862 --> 00:03:27,029
- I'm a middle schooler now.
- What?!
89
00:03:27,131 --> 00:03:28,196
After I inhaled
90
00:03:28,298 --> 00:03:30,132
the St. Orlando's summer reading list,
91
00:03:30,234 --> 00:03:32,100
I knew I was working way above my level.
92
00:03:32,202 --> 00:03:33,669
So, long story short,
93
00:03:33,771 --> 00:03:35,203
we called Principal Hunter,
94
00:03:35,305 --> 00:03:36,405
took a few tests,
95
00:03:36,507 --> 00:03:37,539
wrote an essay,
96
00:03:37,641 --> 00:03:38,573
bing, bang, boom,
97
00:03:38,676 --> 00:03:39,641
here we are.
98
00:03:39,710 --> 00:03:41,743
- When were you gonna tell me?
- I wasn't.
99
00:03:41,845 --> 00:03:44,112
You know how our family doesn't
like to talk about things.
100
00:03:44,214 --> 00:03:46,014
I thought maybe when we're 25,
101
00:03:46,116 --> 00:03:48,350
we'd be having Negronis,
and I'd be like,
102
00:03:48,452 --> 00:03:49,751
"How about that time I skipped 5th grade
103
00:03:49,853 --> 00:03:50,986
and we never talked about it"?
104
00:03:51,088 --> 00:03:52,487
I see how it could've
105
00:03:52,556 --> 00:03:53,889
played out that way.
106
00:03:53,991 --> 00:03:55,023
Sure.
107
00:03:58,896 --> 00:04:00,529
Uh, get the belly again.
108
00:04:00,597 --> 00:04:01,763
Every time I turn around,
109
00:04:01,865 --> 00:04:03,465
someone's wiping barbecue
sauce on that belly.
110
00:04:04,668 --> 00:04:06,034
Hello?
111
00:04:06,136 --> 00:04:07,536
Hello?
112
00:04:07,638 --> 00:04:09,805
I'm so sorry.
These are supposed to transition,
113
00:04:09,907 --> 00:04:11,406
but they take a while.
114
00:04:15,545 --> 00:04:16,444
There they go.
115
00:04:16,546 --> 00:04:18,313
Uh, can I help you?
116
00:04:18,415 --> 00:04:19,614
I am Matthew Chestnut,
117
00:04:19,683 --> 00:04:21,716
from Kenny Rogers'
Roasters corporate office.
118
00:04:21,818 --> 00:04:23,051
I'm Kenny's right-hand man,
119
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:24,319
or should I say left-hand man
120
00:04:24,387 --> 00:04:25,386
because Kenny's always right?
121
00:04:25,489 --> 00:04:26,688
Hmm. Finally!
122
00:04:26,756 --> 00:04:28,690
I've been calling you guys
for months about our sign.
123
00:04:28,725 --> 00:04:29,924
Oh, sorry about that.
124
00:04:29,993 --> 00:04:33,695
Roasters is very busy with
425 locations across Canada,
125
00:04:33,763 --> 00:04:35,697
the United States,
the Middle East, Asia.
126
00:04:35,799 --> 00:04:38,333
Hey, got a quick question...
You probably know this...
127
00:04:38,435 --> 00:04:39,701
Do Asian people like corn?
128
00:04:39,769 --> 00:04:41,936
Should we put corn in our Asian stores?
129
00:04:43,093 --> 00:04:44,961
Um, I like corn.
130
00:04:45,119 --> 00:04:45,942
Okay, yep.
131
00:04:46,576 --> 00:04:48,392
It's a go on the Asian corn.
132
00:04:49,130 --> 00:04:50,798
Okay.
133
00:04:50,846 --> 00:04:52,246
Uh, well, welcome.
134
00:04:52,314 --> 00:04:53,680
I'm Louis Huang, founder.
135
00:04:53,749 --> 00:04:55,682
Uh, so, about our sign,
right now it says
136
00:04:55,718 --> 00:04:58,452
"Kenny Rogers'
Michael Bolton's Cattleman's Ranch."
137
00:04:58,521 --> 00:04:59,820
Wordy.
138
00:04:59,855 --> 00:05:01,622
We should take Michael
Bolton's name down, right?
139
00:05:01,724 --> 00:05:03,157
Oh, oh, oh, uh, n-no.
140
00:05:03,259 --> 00:05:05,626
Uh, Kenny and Michael
have an intense rivalry,
141
00:05:05,694 --> 00:05:08,695
so Kenny wants to keep his
name above Michael's forever.
142
00:05:09,198 --> 00:05:10,664
- Oh.
- Yeah. Don't worry about it.
143
00:05:10,766 --> 00:05:12,266
These are the types of
things I'll help you navigate
144
00:05:12,334 --> 00:05:13,834
over the next few months.
145
00:05:14,316 --> 00:05:16,427
- Few months?
- Yeah, few months to a year.
146
00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:17,113
But don't worry,
147
00:05:17,177 --> 00:05:18,305
Kenny loves what you're doing here.
148
00:05:18,876 --> 00:05:19,760
Oh!
149
00:05:19,897 --> 00:05:22,041
I accidentally tracked this leaf in.
150
00:05:22,144 --> 00:05:24,499
I'm gonna go, uh, throw it back outside.
151
00:05:28,617 --> 00:05:31,284
There's my superstar!
152
00:05:31,386 --> 00:05:34,888
Lincoln Middle School's
first ever grade skipper.
153
00:05:34,956 --> 00:05:36,556
Is this contact appropriate?
154
00:05:39,161 --> 00:05:41,161
We got you this welcome pencil.
155
00:05:41,644 --> 00:05:43,448
Come down to my office any time,
156
00:05:43,533 --> 00:05:45,570
and Denise will hook you up with lead.
157
00:05:47,502 --> 00:05:49,602
Unlimited lead.
158
00:05:54,842 --> 00:05:56,776
Looks like... chemistry.
159
00:05:58,488 --> 00:05:59,438
Thank you.
160
00:06:01,649 --> 00:06:03,770
Whoa. That was weird.
161
00:06:03,907 --> 00:06:05,885
Girls usually love you.
162
00:06:06,313 --> 00:06:08,245
That's never happened before.
163
00:06:08,389 --> 00:06:10,656
Maybe she didn't see
me because she's blind.
164
00:06:10,724 --> 00:06:11,957
Who? Celeste?
165
00:06:12,026 --> 00:06:13,492
No, she has perfect vision.
166
00:06:13,561 --> 00:06:15,194
In the last yearbook under "likes,"
167
00:06:15,262 --> 00:06:18,228
she wrote, "Boys, Spice Girls,
and seeing perfectly."
168
00:06:18,724 --> 00:06:20,499
Hmm.
169
00:06:35,227 --> 00:06:35,881
Alison!
170
00:06:39,039 --> 00:06:40,739
Excuse me. Coming through.
171
00:06:40,841 --> 00:06:42,140
That's my girl in there.
172
00:06:42,209 --> 00:06:44,443
This liar says that he's your boyfriend.
173
00:06:44,545 --> 00:06:46,435
You want me to put him in the trash?
174
00:06:46,562 --> 00:06:48,280
He is my boyfriend, but thanks.
175
00:06:48,349 --> 00:06:49,715
That's sweet.
176
00:06:49,783 --> 00:06:51,950
I'm gonna call an audible on that play?
177
00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:55,632
Damn!
This one's coming for our playbook.
178
00:06:56,592 --> 00:06:58,590
My girl!
179
00:06:59,115 --> 00:07:00,445
How was woodwind camp?
180
00:07:00,614 --> 00:07:02,028
One of the flautists went missing,
181
00:07:02,081 --> 00:07:04,149
but they found her in a bog.
182
00:07:04,464 --> 00:07:05,363
Cool!
183
00:07:05,465 --> 00:07:07,332
Um, what did those idiot jocks want?
184
00:07:07,434 --> 00:07:08,900
They just wanted to say hi.
185
00:07:08,968 --> 00:07:11,102
I'll be playing the piccolo
in marching band this year,
186
00:07:11,137 --> 00:07:12,603
so I'm getting to know the team.
187
00:07:12,706 --> 00:07:13,604
They seem nice.
188
00:07:15,408 --> 00:07:16,607
I got to get to class.
189
00:07:16,710 --> 00:07:17,942
I'll save you a seat at lunch.
190
00:07:18,044 --> 00:07:19,077
Great!
191
00:07:19,145 --> 00:07:20,712
I told Number 53 he could sit with us,
192
00:07:20,780 --> 00:07:23,314
so try to get a big table...
and an end seat
193
00:07:23,383 --> 00:07:25,650
because his shoulders are so broad.
194
00:07:37,059 --> 00:07:38,098
I want you to know
195
00:07:38,164 --> 00:07:39,903
I snuck this hat out and wore it.
196
00:07:40,066 --> 00:07:41,298
I know. Terrible.
197
00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:42,900
But I see the error of my ways.
198
00:07:43,002 --> 00:07:44,001
You were right.
199
00:07:44,103 --> 00:07:45,602
High school is serious,
200
00:07:45,705 --> 00:07:47,838
and to succeed, I need discipline,
201
00:07:47,940 --> 00:07:51,375
a strict dress code,
and to keep my eye on the ball.
202
00:07:51,444 --> 00:07:52,910
Okay...
203
00:07:53,012 --> 00:07:54,244
Great. So we agree.
204
00:07:54,347 --> 00:07:55,612
I'm going out for the football team.
205
00:07:55,715 --> 00:07:57,781
And get concussed? No way!
206
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:01,545
Mom,
you have to sign this permission slip.
207
00:08:01,614 --> 00:08:03,313
Football is gonna be my
thing in high school.
208
00:08:03,366 --> 00:08:05,701
- So find a different thing.
- I can't!
209
00:08:05,872 --> 00:08:07,148
Alison's in the band,
210
00:08:07,183 --> 00:08:08,816
and she's gonna be
spending a lot of time
211
00:08:08,885 --> 00:08:09,884
with the football team.
212
00:08:09,986 --> 00:08:11,719
I've got to be one of those guys.
213
00:08:11,821 --> 00:08:13,221
This says the school's not liable
214
00:08:13,289 --> 00:08:14,755
in the event of a concussion...
215
00:08:14,824 --> 00:08:15,756
Spelled wrong, by the way...
216
00:08:15,825 --> 00:08:17,291
Loss of limb, or death.
217
00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:20,079
Mom, Mom, Mom,
you're looking at it all wrong.
218
00:08:20,129 --> 00:08:22,496
What if it goes well?
That means college scholarship,
219
00:08:22,598 --> 00:08:24,064
NFL, tons of money!
220
00:08:24,133 --> 00:08:26,000
You marry a white girl,
become a Hertz pitchman,
221
00:08:26,068 --> 00:08:28,102
and then kill your wife
because you lost your mind
222
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,770
from all the concussions.
223
00:08:29,839 --> 00:08:33,274
No! I'm not letting my
son become the next O.J.
224
00:08:37,315 --> 00:08:39,636
_
225
00:08:43,621 --> 00:08:46,421
Rolling in at 10:00. Oh.
226
00:08:46,447 --> 00:08:47,819
Kenny's not gonna love that.
227
00:08:47,889 --> 00:08:49,322
I try to have breakfast with my kids.
228
00:08:49,424 --> 00:08:50,423
I-I'm kidding.
229
00:08:50,492 --> 00:08:52,158
I literally just ran in
here from the parking lot
230
00:08:52,227 --> 00:08:53,793
and stood here right
before you walked in.
231
00:08:53,862 --> 00:08:54,694
Oh, feel my chest.
232
00:08:54,796 --> 00:08:56,229
My heart is beating so fast.
233
00:08:56,298 --> 00:08:57,497
You got my heart going, too.
234
00:08:57,566 --> 00:08:58,798
I thought you were mad.
235
00:08:58,900 --> 00:08:59,966
Boom boom brothers.
236
00:09:05,955 --> 00:09:08,923
Anyway, um, I've done a full
assessment of the restaurant,
237
00:09:09,010 --> 00:09:10,143
and I think I have a couple things
238
00:09:10,178 --> 00:09:12,753
that are gonna take
us to that next level.
239
00:09:12,813 --> 00:09:15,114
Mm-hmm. Um, first,
we should add a customer comment line.
240
00:09:15,182 --> 00:09:18,350
Yeah, let's give people
an anonymous forum to be racist.
241
00:09:19,387 --> 00:09:20,920
Um, also, back at Roasters,
242
00:09:20,988 --> 00:09:22,655
we do have a seat-yourself policy.
243
00:09:22,690 --> 00:09:24,890
It creates a relaxed,
kind of down-home environment.
244
00:09:24,959 --> 00:09:26,158
Well, I've found that having a host
245
00:09:26,227 --> 00:09:27,760
lets you get to know your customers.
246
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:28,994
Um, and lastly,
247
00:09:29,063 --> 00:09:31,587
I do think we should lose
some of the steak dishes
248
00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:34,054
from the menu and add
some rotisserie chicken.
249
00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:35,492
That's what Kenny's known for.
250
00:09:35,598 --> 00:09:37,975
Oh, well, here at Cattleman's Ranch,
251
00:09:38,038 --> 00:09:39,438
we're known for our steak.
252
00:09:39,540 --> 00:09:41,740
This isn't Chickenman's... Ranch.
253
00:09:41,809 --> 00:09:43,442
Chickenman's!
That's not bad.
254
00:09:43,510 --> 00:09:45,310
Maybe call the comment line, suggest it.
255
00:09:58,634 --> 00:10:01,299
What's up? I'm Eddie. The Booty Man.
256
00:10:01,458 --> 00:10:03,780
Maybe you've seen me in
my hat around the halls?
257
00:10:03,863 --> 00:10:05,629
I don't really notice other dudes, man.
258
00:10:05,698 --> 00:10:07,698
Yeah, yeah. Cool, cool. Who would?
259
00:10:09,569 --> 00:10:13,437
Yes, I am a woman and a football coach.
260
00:10:13,506 --> 00:10:15,739
That's right. Your coach is a lady.
261
00:10:15,842 --> 00:10:17,778
Come on. Let's get it out of the way.
262
00:10:18,778 --> 00:10:20,077
Are you on your period?
263
00:10:20,146 --> 00:10:21,912
Go run laps.
264
00:10:21,981 --> 00:10:23,781
That's a yes.
265
00:10:24,863 --> 00:10:27,831
Took me forever to get my mom
to sign the tryout waiver.
266
00:10:27,910 --> 00:10:29,295
I had no problem.
267
00:10:31,911 --> 00:10:33,745
_
268
00:10:34,576 --> 00:10:36,819
G-ma dropping wisdom from the hall.
269
00:10:39,164 --> 00:10:40,831
How many laps do you want me to do,
Coach?
270
00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:42,199
I want you to do as many laps
271
00:10:42,301 --> 00:10:44,801
as there are seasons of "Murphy Brown."
272
00:10:45,512 --> 00:10:46,739
10.
273
00:10:49,808 --> 00:10:52,275
And sure enough,
Denise refilled the pencil lead.
274
00:10:52,377 --> 00:10:54,444
Twice. I figured it out.
275
00:10:54,513 --> 00:10:56,579
You're the reason things are
going bad for me this year.
276
00:10:56,648 --> 00:10:58,047
What are you talking about?
277
00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,683
The only thing that's
different at school is you.
278
00:11:00,752 --> 00:11:02,552
Suddenly, girls are rejecting me,
279
00:11:02,654 --> 00:11:04,487
the cafeteria ran out of green beans,
280
00:11:04,523 --> 00:11:06,089
somebody drew penises
in all my textbooks...
281
00:11:06,158 --> 00:11:10,298
You think I would waste
pencil lead on pornography?
282
00:11:10,430 --> 00:11:11,313
Emery...
283
00:11:11,419 --> 00:11:12,303
_
284
00:11:12,408 --> 00:11:14,044
_
285
00:11:14,229 --> 00:11:15,113
What do you mean?
286
00:11:15,218 --> 00:11:18,068
_
287
00:11:18,187 --> 00:11:22,079
_
288
00:11:36,348 --> 00:11:38,162
Mmm.
289
00:11:39,916 --> 00:11:43,491
_
290
00:11:43,702 --> 00:11:48,531
_
291
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:51,417
_
292
00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:54,357
That can't be true.
293
00:11:54,425 --> 00:11:56,058
Well, it makes sense.
294
00:11:56,094 --> 00:11:57,727
You got me kicked out of private school,
295
00:11:57,829 --> 00:11:59,896
no one believed you about Tiger Woods,
296
00:11:59,964 --> 00:12:01,864
we didn't get to see that big peanut,
297
00:12:01,933 --> 00:12:04,467
and there was that week where
you thought clogs were unisex.
298
00:12:04,502 --> 00:12:07,270
Pinocchio wears them,
and he's a real boy!
299
00:12:07,372 --> 00:12:10,029
Did Eddie have a bad-luck
year when he was 12?
300
00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:11,612
_
301
00:12:11,744 --> 00:12:13,222
_
302
00:12:15,992 --> 00:12:18,482
I'm gonna turn the temp up
on the rotisserie one degree,
303
00:12:18,549 --> 00:12:20,482
just enough to make the
chicken dry and stringy.
304
00:12:20,584 --> 00:12:22,484
Then we'll see how long
it stays on the menu.
305
00:12:22,586 --> 00:12:24,052
Louis, get ahold of yourself!
306
00:12:24,154 --> 00:12:27,189
You're spending a lot of energy
worrying about small changes.
307
00:12:27,291 --> 00:12:29,424
But Cattleman's is already
a great restaurant.
308
00:12:29,527 --> 00:12:30,559
It is.
309
00:12:30,661 --> 00:12:32,427
So great that two music moguls
310
00:12:32,496 --> 00:12:33,962
wanted to put their name on it.
311
00:12:34,031 --> 00:12:36,894
You did that. So do it again.
312
00:12:38,435 --> 00:12:41,010
Imagine this pillow is Cattleman's.
313
00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:42,670
You're spending all your energy
314
00:12:42,739 --> 00:12:44,139
trying to make this pillow perfect
315
00:12:44,207 --> 00:12:47,442
when there could be
pillows all over the bed.
316
00:12:47,544 --> 00:12:48,910
Cattleman's 2.
317
00:12:49,012 --> 00:12:50,779
Cattleman's 3.
318
00:12:50,881 --> 00:12:52,380
Cattleman's To-Go.
319
00:12:52,482 --> 00:12:53,782
Just look at Kenny Rogers.
320
00:12:53,850 --> 00:12:55,717
He is thinking big picture.
321
00:12:55,819 --> 00:12:59,341
He's not in there every
day worrying about chicken.
322
00:12:59,394 --> 00:13:01,993
No, he's making love to Dolly Parton.
323
00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:04,460
- You think?
- Right now.
324
00:13:10,466 --> 00:13:12,233
You made the team? That's great!
325
00:13:12,302 --> 00:13:13,267
Sure did.
326
00:13:13,336 --> 00:13:15,336
Coach called me an Asian Barry Sanders.
327
00:13:15,438 --> 00:13:17,171
See you on the field of play, bro.
328
00:13:17,273 --> 00:13:18,239
That's my teammate, Max.
329
00:13:18,308 --> 00:13:19,574
We both want the same thing...
330
00:13:19,642 --> 00:13:21,309
To bring home a title for our school.
331
00:13:21,377 --> 00:13:23,277
Nice.
So, I'll see you at practice later?
332
00:13:23,379 --> 00:13:25,479
I'm number 22... Double deuce.
333
00:13:25,548 --> 00:13:27,582
Our love code can be two piccolo toots.
334
00:13:30,286 --> 00:13:32,085
Regular citizens, stand aside.
335
00:13:32,154 --> 00:13:34,131
Athlete coming through.
336
00:13:35,424 --> 00:13:36,523
Butterfingers.
337
00:13:36,559 --> 00:13:38,358
Brian better crawl under
there and get it back.
338
00:13:38,460 --> 00:13:39,726
In your dreams.
339
00:13:39,828 --> 00:13:41,061
Why would I dream about that?
340
00:13:41,130 --> 00:13:43,912
Don't tell us your dreams!
We're not friends anymore.
341
00:13:53,003 --> 00:13:55,325
Oh. Kenny Rogers likes the salad bar
342
00:13:55,391 --> 00:13:57,792
to be in descending order of crunch.
343
00:13:57,845 --> 00:14:00,259
Uh, listen, I want to apologize
344
00:14:00,285 --> 00:14:03,146
if I've been a little
resistant to change.
345
00:14:03,248 --> 00:14:04,681
Oh, don't worry about it. I get it.
346
00:14:04,747 --> 00:14:06,554
I've bought the same jeans for 20 years.
347
00:14:06,607 --> 00:14:09,430
My wife buys me chinos,
I tell her, "Amy, stop."
348
00:14:09,496 --> 00:14:11,888
Okay, good.
349
00:14:11,990 --> 00:14:13,652
Yeah, I just have one more tiny change.
350
00:14:13,718 --> 00:14:16,025
We are gonna have to lose the bear.
351
00:14:16,828 --> 00:14:17,927
- What?!
- Yeah.
352
00:14:18,030 --> 00:14:20,664
Mr. Rogers has a complicated
relationship with bears.
353
00:14:20,766 --> 00:14:22,032
Can't have one in his restaurant.
354
00:14:22,134 --> 00:14:23,133
But this bear was the first thing
355
00:14:23,235 --> 00:14:24,301
I bought for the restaurant.
356
00:14:24,369 --> 00:14:26,136
Mark and I have been
through everything together.
357
00:14:26,204 --> 00:14:28,405
I'm sorry,
but one tried to rip Kenny's throat out,
358
00:14:28,507 --> 00:14:30,340
so... bye, Mark.
359
00:14:30,409 --> 00:14:32,242
Here's a list of pre-approved
taxidermied animals.
360
00:14:32,311 --> 00:14:33,710
Just let us know which one you want.
361
00:14:33,812 --> 00:14:35,111
We'll have it shot and stuffed.
362
00:14:37,931 --> 00:14:39,082
Bald eagle?
363
00:14:39,435 --> 00:14:40,850
French bulldog?
364
00:14:43,419 --> 00:14:44,654
This is war!
365
00:14:48,559 --> 00:14:49,926
Yoo-hoo.
366
00:14:50,028 --> 00:14:50,927
Hey!
367
00:14:50,995 --> 00:14:52,762
Hey!
368
00:14:52,864 --> 00:14:54,497
I just popped in to see
369
00:14:54,599 --> 00:14:57,633
if you accidentally took all
of our monogrammed towels
370
00:14:57,735 --> 00:14:59,268
when you moved out of our house.
371
00:15:01,306 --> 00:15:02,138
Oh...
372
00:15:03,841 --> 00:15:08,059
I thought the "H" and "M"
stood for "His" and..." Mine."
373
00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:10,112
Honest mistake.
374
00:15:10,214 --> 00:15:12,048
I guess.
375
00:15:12,150 --> 00:15:13,783
Oh, congrats, by the way.
376
00:15:13,885 --> 00:15:16,152
Nicole told me Eddie's
on the football team.
377
00:15:16,220 --> 00:15:18,548
No, he's not.
I said he couldn't try out.
378
00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:19,657
I think he is.
379
00:15:19,736 --> 00:15:22,005
She said she's picking him
up after practice later.
380
00:15:33,804 --> 00:15:35,237
Is Eddie on the football team?
381
00:15:35,306 --> 00:15:39,220
He is! Number 22. He's doing well. Look.
382
00:15:44,128 --> 00:15:46,015
Where'd he learn to juke like that?
383
00:15:47,677 --> 00:15:49,585
Concussed!
384
00:15:49,687 --> 00:15:51,353
Eddie!
385
00:15:54,825 --> 00:15:56,158
Who the hell is this?
386
00:15:56,260 --> 00:15:57,559
Where's Eddie?
387
00:15:57,661 --> 00:15:59,186
I think he's over there.
388
00:16:07,273 --> 00:16:10,597
I am so mad I can't hear myself speak.
389
00:16:10,940 --> 00:16:14,276
All I can hear is the anger in my ears.
390
00:16:14,345 --> 00:16:17,913
It is like the hiss of a
tea kettle filled with rage.
391
00:16:18,367 --> 00:16:20,149
I'm sorry. It's just...
392
00:16:20,251 --> 00:16:22,551
Alison, when I saw you talking
to those football players,
393
00:16:22,620 --> 00:16:24,220
I got worried that you
might not like me anymore
394
00:16:24,322 --> 00:16:26,055
if I wasn't on the team.
395
00:16:26,157 --> 00:16:27,423
But I didn't make the cut,
396
00:16:27,492 --> 00:16:29,892
so I paid Max to pretend to be me.
397
00:16:29,961 --> 00:16:31,646
Unbelievable.
398
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,179
I'm gonna go make sure
that poor boy's okay
399
00:16:34,232 --> 00:16:36,999
and get back the money you paid him.
400
00:16:37,490 --> 00:16:39,429
You didn't give me very much credit,
401
00:16:39,561 --> 00:16:41,052
thinking I would immediately ditch you
402
00:16:41,105 --> 00:16:42,537
for a football player.
403
00:16:42,639 --> 00:16:44,106
I know. I messed up.
404
00:16:46,259 --> 00:16:49,426
Maybe it's a good
time for a fresh start.
405
00:16:49,835 --> 00:16:51,510
Are you breaking up with me?
406
00:16:52,605 --> 00:16:53,882
I'm sorry, Eddie.
407
00:16:58,747 --> 00:16:59,776
Eddie!
408
00:16:59,934 --> 00:17:02,520
You paid this boy $50?!
409
00:17:02,744 --> 00:17:04,126
He would've done it for $20!
410
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:07,876
Hi, this is Harry.
411
00:17:07,964 --> 00:17:09,764
Big fan of Cattleman's Ranch.
412
00:17:09,833 --> 00:17:13,234
My comment is, I love the
stuffed bear in the dining room.
413
00:17:13,303 --> 00:17:15,603
Thank you.
414
00:17:15,672 --> 00:17:18,306
I have cleared everything
fun out of Eddie's room.
415
00:17:18,408 --> 00:17:19,507
- Help me bury it.
- In the morning.
416
00:17:19,576 --> 00:17:20,541
Right now I'm at war.
417
00:17:22,612 --> 00:17:24,712
Hello.
I'm a white, Southern woman
418
00:17:24,814 --> 00:17:26,648
who's used to getting what she wants.
419
00:17:26,750 --> 00:17:28,383
And what I want is steak.
420
00:17:28,485 --> 00:17:31,419
Louis,
this is important.
421
00:17:31,604 --> 00:17:32,587
Our son was almost concussed.
422
00:17:32,622 --> 00:17:34,489
But he wasn't.
Eddie is fine.
423
00:17:34,557 --> 00:17:36,759
It's the restaurant I
built from the ground up
424
00:17:36,826 --> 00:17:38,692
that's dying a death by a thousand cuts.
425
00:17:38,794 --> 00:17:40,794
We talked about this with the pillows!
426
00:17:40,830 --> 00:17:43,764
Why are you still
wasting so much energy?
427
00:17:43,833 --> 00:17:44,999
Excuse me.
428
00:17:45,067 --> 00:17:47,393
- May I come in for a glass of water?
- No.
429
00:17:47,485 --> 00:17:50,168
Your dehumidifier is full. Drink that.
430
00:17:52,358 --> 00:17:54,614
I thought I could take a step back
once he was in high school,
431
00:17:54,677 --> 00:17:56,977
but it's always gonna
be something with him.
432
00:17:57,012 --> 00:17:58,779
That's how I feel about Cattleman's.
433
00:17:58,848 --> 00:18:02,249
I can't quit caring for it,
no matter how much I try.
434
00:18:02,351 --> 00:18:05,118
Cattleman's is your Eddie.
435
00:18:05,221 --> 00:18:06,487
A pain in the ass,
436
00:18:06,589 --> 00:18:07,721
always on the brink of disaster,
437
00:18:07,790 --> 00:18:10,224
but you will never stop fighting for it,
438
00:18:10,326 --> 00:18:12,402
because it's your first.
439
00:18:12,828 --> 00:18:14,427
That's it! That's exactly it!
440
00:18:14,496 --> 00:18:16,529
Well, why didn't you just say that?
441
00:18:16,631 --> 00:18:18,231
You need to march back in there
442
00:18:18,300 --> 00:18:20,467
and save your baby from being concussed
443
00:18:20,569 --> 00:18:21,968
before you rip off its helmet
444
00:18:22,037 --> 00:18:24,635
and see a boy you don't even recognize.
445
00:18:24,883 --> 00:18:26,206
When I get done with that place,
it'll be called
446
00:18:26,274 --> 00:18:30,720
Louis Huang's Kenny Rogers'
Michael Bolton's Cattleman's Ranch!
447
00:18:31,363 --> 00:18:32,699
The name is too long.
448
00:18:32,749 --> 00:18:34,068
I know.
449
00:18:36,276 --> 00:18:38,751
This restaurant is my dream, Matthew,
450
00:18:38,819 --> 00:18:41,020
and that dream started
with me buying this bear
451
00:18:41,122 --> 00:18:42,788
at the estate sale of a game hunter
452
00:18:42,857 --> 00:18:45,090
who shot himself cleaning his gun.
453
00:18:45,192 --> 00:18:47,059
I built this place.
454
00:18:47,161 --> 00:18:48,160
I mean, not from the ground up...
455
00:18:48,262 --> 00:18:49,295
It used to be a strip club...
456
00:18:49,363 --> 00:18:52,131
But I took it over,
thoroughly sanitized it,
457
00:18:52,199 --> 00:18:54,433
and I made it what it is today.
458
00:18:54,502 --> 00:18:56,769
Cattleman's will always be my baby,
459
00:18:56,837 --> 00:18:58,537
so I don't care what you do at Roasters,
460
00:18:58,639 --> 00:19:00,539
you're not changing a thing.
461
00:19:00,608 --> 00:19:02,474
Oh, um, um... Um, I'm sorry.
462
00:19:02,543 --> 00:19:03,676
I'm not processing anything.
463
00:19:03,744 --> 00:19:05,010
The school just got ahold of me.
464
00:19:05,079 --> 00:19:08,483
My son, Max, was concussed
at football practice today.
465
00:19:08,879 --> 00:19:10,066
I-I have to go see him.
466
00:19:10,165 --> 00:19:12,639
Uh... d-do whatever you want.
467
00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:15,587
We did it!
468
00:19:15,689 --> 00:19:17,088
We saved Cattleman's!
469
00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:23,061
Oh.
470
00:19:23,163 --> 00:19:24,963
Can I seat you, gentlemen?
471
00:19:25,031 --> 00:19:26,397
You're gonna love this place.
472
00:19:26,466 --> 00:19:27,699
It's full nude.
473
00:19:27,801 --> 00:19:30,001
Hey, does Cinnamon still work here?
474
00:19:30,103 --> 00:19:32,804
Tell her Barry's finally
out on good behavior.
475
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:47,819
What are you doing?
476
00:19:47,921 --> 00:19:49,254
We heard about Alison.
477
00:19:49,289 --> 00:19:51,222
Sorry, man. That sucks.
478
00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:54,025
I know you're not hungry,
but you need to eat something.
479
00:19:56,630 --> 00:19:57,929
So you guys aren't still mad?
480
00:19:58,031 --> 00:20:00,031
We don't even remember what
we were fighting about.
481
00:20:00,133 --> 00:20:01,966
I do, but I'm gonna let it go.
482
00:20:02,068 --> 00:20:03,601
We feel your pain.
483
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:06,504
In a way,
Alison was all of our first girlfriends.
484
00:20:06,606 --> 00:20:09,007
Not me. I got to second base with Edith.
485
00:20:09,109 --> 00:20:10,375
Second base?!
486
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:11,910
You accidentally fell on top of her.
487
00:20:12,012 --> 00:20:13,211
She rolled her ankle.
488
00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:15,346
Yes, but she let me sign her cast
489
00:20:15,448 --> 00:20:16,881
really close to her knee.
490
00:20:18,819 --> 00:20:20,485
Okay.
491
00:20:20,587 --> 00:20:23,054
Okay, so, we never got to talk about the
"ER" finale.
492
00:20:23,156 --> 00:20:24,389
Oh, my gosh.
493
00:20:39,311 --> 00:20:41,845
110 days till the year
of the Ox is over.
494
00:20:41,947 --> 00:20:44,214
111... today's not over.
495
00:20:44,316 --> 00:20:46,417
You know, I was thinking...
496
00:20:46,519 --> 00:20:48,685
Up until now,
you've led a pretty charmed life.
497
00:20:48,788 --> 00:20:51,688
So your bad is basically
everyone else's normal.
498
00:20:51,791 --> 00:20:53,857
Huh, maybe so.
499
00:20:53,959 --> 00:20:55,392
Good morning, Kyle.
500
00:20:56,996 --> 00:20:59,563
Sometimes normal people get ignored.
501
00:20:59,665 --> 00:21:01,231
People ignore you?
502
00:21:01,333 --> 00:21:02,933
Good thing you've got me at school now.
503
00:21:03,035 --> 00:21:04,568
I've got your back this year.
504
00:21:04,670 --> 00:21:07,871
Here, you can use my pencil today.
505
00:21:07,973 --> 00:21:09,473
Thanks.
506
00:21:11,310 --> 00:21:13,277
- My lead rods!
- I'm sorry.
507
00:21:13,379 --> 00:21:14,812
- Here, let me help.
- Don't touch them!
508
00:21:14,914 --> 00:21:16,580
Just hold my bag.
35547
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