Original subtitles

[jazz music]

[cheers and applause]

- From the Penn & Teller Theater

at the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas,

here's our host, Alyson Hannigan!

[cheers and applause]

- Welcome to "Fool Us,"

where we pull out the world's best magicians

like a magician pulls a rabbit out of a hat.

Wait, that analogy was a little too on the nose.

I'll figure out a better one later.

For now, please welcome the Penn and Teller of magic,

Penn and Teller!

[cheers and applause]

If any of our performers successfully fool

our two titans of magic, they win a slot

performing in Penn and Teller's world-famous show.

Let's meet our first potential fooler.

[fireworks explode]

- My name is Riccardo Berdini. I'm from Italy.

That's why I'm so full of life!

During my childhood, I was obsessed with music.

I started to be a successful musical theatre actor.

[guitar strums]

I played roles like Jean Valjean in "Les Mis,"

which gave me the award as Best Musical Performer in Italy.

I was always attracted to magic,

but I decided to be a professional magician

just recently in the past two, three, years.

Combining magic and music together,

that's where I wanted to focus my way of being a magician.

It's beautiful to see how music can influence our emotions,

our decisions, our choices.

It's incredible.

[cheers and applause]

- All the way from Italy, here is Riccardo Berdini.

[cheers and applause]

- Thank you very much.

Today, I'm gonna try to demonstrate to you

the incredible connection between magic and music,

attempting an experiment in memory and forgetting.

Alyson! How is your memory?

- Uh, I forgot.

- A big round of applause for Alyson!

[cheers and applause]

- Hi. - Hey, nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

- I got a simple question for you.

- Okay.

- Are you able to hold two thoughts at the same time?

- Hm, sometimes. - I knew that.

- Yeah. - I knew that.

Okay, perfect, I'm gonna show you two words,

and you have to try your hardest to remember them, okay?

- Okay. - And then with the magical

power of music, and my Italian accent,

I'm going to delete them from your mind

and replace them with something else.

- Okay. - Okay?

- All right. - One thing.

It's very important.

Please, do not say anything out loud, okay?

The same for you, guys. Please, don't say any word,

no matter what you're going to see, all right?

Okay.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the first word.

Penn and Teller, can you see it?

- Yeah. - Okay.

Alyson, look at this word.

Lock it in your mind.

You got it? Okay, perfect.

Wow, very good. I'm proud of you.

[laughter]

Okay, and this is the second word.

Can you see it? - Yeah.

- Perfect. Alyson, look at the word.

Remember. Remember it, okay?

Perfect, wow.

Much better than I expected. [chuckles]

Okay. You know, guys,

the history of human kind

is full of amazing tales and stories,

combining together magic and music.

For example... [guitar strums]

The word "enchantment" itself

derives from the Latin word cantare,

which means to sing.

That's what I'm gonna do right now.

I'm gonna cast a spell, Alyson,

enchanting you singing a song.

Ay, ay, ay

Ay-ay-ay, ay, ay

Ay, ay, ay

Ay, ay, ay

Ay, ay, ay

Ay-ay-ay, ay, ay

Ay, ay, ay-ay-ay

Ay, ay

[ding]

[laughter]

Do you feel anything?

How do you feel? You can talk right now.

- Oh. - You can talk.

- It's lovely. - Oh, thank you.

Do you think I affected you somehow?

[laughter] - Uh...

I mean, it was a lovely song.

- Okay. Well, let's see what happened.

Okay, Alyson, for the first time,

can you please tell us

the first word that I showed you.

- "Forgotten."

- Forgotten? Have you forgotten?

- [giggles] "Forgotten" was the word.

- Oh, "forgotten" was the word.

Oh, interesting...

And what's the second word that I showed you?

That was easy to remember, right?

- Right. - Okay, what was the word?

- The second word? - The second word, yeah.

- "Riccardo"... - Yes? What?

- Was the second word.

- Oh, the second word was "Riccardo."

- Yes. - Oh, cool, yeah.

You know, I like to leave a signature

when I go into the mind of someone else.

Yes, okay, Alyson, I gotta tell you something...

- Yeah.

- The two words that I showed you

were not "Forgotten" and "Riccardo."

- No. - Okay, Penn, please,

can you tell us, what was the first word that you saw?

- "Enchantment." - "Enchantment."

People in the audience, is that the word that you see?

- Yeah! [applause]

- And Penn, what was the second word that you saw?

- "Remember." - "Remember."

Is that the word that you saw, guys in the audience?

- Yeah! [applause]

- Well, Alyson, it looked like

somehow I changed your memory.

Ladies and gentlemen, the enchantment worked!

[cheers and applause] - [laughs]

- Oh, no, wait a second, wait a second!

Alyson, Alyson, I don't want to leave you like this, okay?

I have to delete the enchantment, okay?

Look at me. [imitates reverse singing]

[laughter]

How do you feel? Same as before, right?

- Uh... - Nothing's changed.

- Okay. - You think so.

What are you reading now? - "Enchantment."

- And? - "Remember."

- Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much!

A big round of applause for Alyson!

[cheers and applause] Thank you very much.

- Riccardo Berdini! - Thank you, Penn and Teller,

for allowing me to be here.

It was a pleasure. Thank you!

- Oh, okay. Well, all right.

You know, now I'm confused,

but there you go. Let them talk.

- But you're free from the spell,

so now you can be yourself again, okay?

- Thank you so much. [laughter]

So how did you get into magic?

Or, uh, mind games.

What did you do to me?

- Think about music. Music is a mystery.

Music is something that we still don't understand.

I mean, music can really affect

our emotions, our feelings,

our thoughts sometimes,

so it's magical.

If you think about it, music is the real magic of life.

But I love magic so much, and slowly, slowly,

magic started to be not only a hobby.

It started to be a side job,

and now it's almost my main job.

- All right, well, let's see if Penn and Teller love you.

- Well... [cheers and applause]

Of everyone we've had on the show,

you're the one who seems to need magic the least

to get partners. [laughter]

Why would you bother with magic?

You're Italian!

You've got everything else going for ya.

I mean, it makes everybody else on the show

look like they're 99 monkeys.

Then the hundredth monkey comes out...

- [laughs] - And just kills us,

being Italian, good-looking, well dressed,

and playing guitar!

You've got everything. Everything.

- You got it. [all laugh]

- Wait--wait, so that's how he did it?

- And you know something? You also do really good magic.

- Oh, thank you. - It's also really good.

- Aww. - Thank you very much.

- All right, so I think you have a date with Penn later...

- Yeah! - Well, I would love to--

- Thank you so much. You didn't get a trophy,

but you charmed them.

Riccardo Berdini! - Thank you very much!

Thank you very much. - Thank you, thank you.

- Thank you all!

[cheers and applause]

- What a great way to start the show.

We've got more magic in store,

including a trick from the masters of magic,

Penn and Teller.

[jazz music]

[jazz music]

[cheers and applause]

- Welcome back to "Fool Us."

When we put our shows together,

we don't just grab any clown off the street.

No, we grab a clown from the Russian Circus.

Take a look.

[fireworks explode]

- I grew up in a Russian circus.

I originally was performing as an acrobat,

and then kind of transitioned into clowning,

'cause acrobatics is way too dangerous.

Had way too many injuries.

The European-Russian style of miming and clowning,

it's very theatrical.

You need to have a lot of different skills,

whether it's acrobatics and flexibility

and juggling and balancing and miming, obviously.

When I first got into magic, I realized that

some of the most simplest magic tricks in the world,

like the sponge ball one, get such huge reactions.

To me, that it was magic is about.

It's not necessarily something super technical.

It's about the reaction you get from people,

the smiles, the laughs.

That's what it's about.

[cheers and applause]

- Please welcome the magic of Yan Markson.

- I feel happy

Bop

So, so happy

Bop, bop, bop

I feel happy

So, so happy

Bop, bop, bop - Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

You know what, I'm just so happy to be here.

[exhales sharply] Wow.

I look good on TV. [laughter]

You know what, I wasn't always a magician.

It took me a while to get here.

You see, when I grew up in the Russian Circus,

both of my parents were famous clowns,

so I knew that I had really big shoes to fill.

[laughter] Now--yeah.

You know, they wanted me to be a juggler,

but I didn't have the balls, so instead...

[laughter]

Instead, I decided to become a magician.

Now, it's not easy to be a magician.

There's lots of secrets, but luckily, these days,

there's an app for that.

This app right here called AutoMagic,

yeah, it does all the magic for you.

It does all the instructions.

You get the magic in the mail,

so, you know, I'm always set to go.

You guys wanna try one out? - Yeah.

[cheers and applause] - Yeah? All right.

Let's see, this one here,

Master Mind Reader.

Ooh... [crowd oohs]

Let's see how it goes. - Hello.

Thank you for trying AutoMagic...

- You're welcome. [chuckles] - The world's first

artificial intelligence app for magicians...

- It's intelligent. - Perfect for magicians

with low intelligence.

- That's right--wait, what? [laughter]

- For this trick, you will need

random country names in a bag...

- Got it. - A chalkboard...

- Yep. - And a volunteer.

- Okay, well, you know what, there's no one better

to perform magic with than Alyson Hannigan herself.

Give her a big warm welcome!

[cheers and applause]

Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you.

- Come up a little closer.

All right, so let's see what we gotta do, right.

There's a little bit of instructions here.

- Next, ask the volunteer

to randomly select a country from the bag.

- Okay, that's easy.

You know what, why don't you grab a couple.

Grab a couple, read them out

to make sure that they're all different.

Go ahead. - Okay.

- There. - Canada.

- Ah, that's where I'm from. - Oh, all right then.

- Yeah, so what's the other one? - Uh...

S--oh. - Sweden.

- Well, misspelled. - "Sweded," yeah.

- Okay. - This company is strange,

you know, yeah. - Right, yes.

- It's a Canadian spelling, actually.

- Okay. - Yeah.

Would you fold these up for me, please?

- Yes.

- And just throw them back in. - Yes.

- Yeah, so we're gonna give it a little shake.

- Okay. - [maniacal clucking]

That's for me. - Thanks.

- Gonna shake it up over here.

Go ahead, reach in.

This time, make sure you don't let me see what it is.

Just keep it in your mind, all right?

You have a country? - Yes.

- You know what it is, right? - Yes.

- All right, so I'm gonna try to figure out

what you're thinking, all right.

Now, it's not easy, but luckily, there's these instructions here.

- Next, now this is where the magic happens.

- All right. - It's easy.

- Good. - Grab the chalkboard

and write down Egypt.

- Okay, wait, what? [laughter]

Really? Egypt? - Yes, Egypt.

- All right.

Wow, that is easy!

- With a Y. - Right.

[laughter]

- Next, it's time to ask your volunteer

to reveal the country they are thinking of.

- Okay, now, Alyson,

you did not tell me what you're thinking of.

Obviously, it's just in your mind.

So for the first time, can you please tell everybody,

what is the country that you thought of in your mind?

- France. [laughter]

- I'm sorry, what? - France.

- France. [laughs]

Oh, you know what, that is exactly--

that is exactly what I was thinking,

you know, France.

Je m'appelle, en Francais. Oui, oui, oui.

France!

Alyson? Yes? - Wow.

- Wow! Yay! - Fantastic, whoo-hoo.

[cheers and applause] Yay...

- Thank you. You know what, give Alyson

a big round of applause. Thank you, Alyson.

Thank you so much. - Thank you.

Go back? Okay. - [indistinct]

Put it right here.

You know what, the great thing about this app

is that there's so many other magic tricks we can do.

[laughs]

Let's see, I brought all this right here.

Some other props.

Let's try this one here.

Yes, okay.

- Thank you for trying... - Oh, we know this part.

- AutoMagic. - I'm just gonna skip--

I'm gonna skip this a little bit--

[tape fast-forwarding]

- Perfect for magicians with low--

[tape fast-forwarding] Low intelligence.

For this trick, you will need two props...

- Okay.

- One is a square of thin blue fabric...

- Okay. - And second, a yellow bandana.

[laughter]

Pick up the bandana.

- [laughs]

- Now fold the bandana in half.

[laughter]

That's right. Fold it in half.

[upbeat string music]

Now fold it one more time.

[laughter]

Take the folded bandana

and hide it in your left hand.

Remember to keep your hand in a natural position.

This is called palming. - Palming.

- Now that you've mastered palming,

open up the folded bandana.

- Oof.

- Show the audience that it's a regular bandana

by waving it up and down.

If an audience member doesn't believe it's a normal bandana,

allow him to wipe his face on it.

- Oh, no--[indistinct] It's okay.

- Now pick up the square piece of fabric

and gather the four corners together,

making a little makeshift bag.

Using your free hand, fold the bandana

along the creases you've made earlier.

- [groans]

- And drop it into the folds of that makeshift bag.

- [indistinct]

- From the outside of the makeshift bag,

squeeze the bandana into a small little ball.

- [indistinct] Okay.

- What the audience didn't see

is that you never put the bandana in the fabric at all.

You really kept it hidden in your left hand.

Remember palming? [laughter]

Again, remember to keep your left hand held naturally.

Just relax and look natural. - [cheerful exhale]

[laughter]

[drum roll]

- And for the grand finish, lift open the fabric

and receive your well-deserved applause.

- I feel happy

Bop

[cheers and applause]

- It's France!

France! [laughs]

- So, so happy

Bop, bop, bop

I feel happy - Yes!

- So, so happy

- Yan Markson!

- Thank you. - Wow!

[cheers and applause] - Thank you.

- So both your parents are clowns.

- That's right. - That's so exciting.

- Yeah. - Did you go through that phase

where you're, like, embarrassed by them,

or did you just embrace it?

- No, I didn't know any different, you know.

I grew up in a circus, so... - That is--

- I thought that is normal. I thought these guys are weird.

[laughter]

- So what other skills did you learn in the circus?

- Skills? I can walk on a tightrope.

I can walk on my hands... - That's great.

- I started off being a clown, doing acrobatics as well.

I'd had way too many injuries,

and realized that there's a better way to entertain people

without having to break your bones.

- Oh. [laughter]

Do you do a backflip, like, every performance...

- No. [laughs] No, no, no. - Or just special for us?

- I actually just kinda thought of that this morning.

Just might as well do a backflip.

And then when I dropped that banana,

I was a little bit worried about the backflip.

I was like-- - Yeah. [laughs]

Yeah. - Yeah.

- I mean, we've all heard about the banana peel.

- Yes, that's right, although that wasn't a peel.

- That could go terribly wrong. - What people don't know

is it's actually the banana that's more slippery

than the peel itself. - Oh, well...

- Yeah, fun fact. - See?

All right, well, let's check in with our two clowns...

- [laughs] - Penn, Teller!

[cheers and applause]

- You know...

one of the things that's wonderful

about sitting here and watching these acts

is seeing classic bits being done.

So we are familiar with Tom Ogden's version...

- [laughs] - Of banana-bandana.

Wonderful to bring it up to date with an app and everything.

Was great at the top, with the countries,

to see a clear bag for a change.

But I have an idea for you.

I think you should go back and petition the producers,

and say to the producers that you think

that not only should we be able to explain

every little thing and little bits of code words and so on,

but if we really know what trick is done,

we should be able to come up there and do it.

And then you just stand over to the side,

watch us do the France thing,

watch us do the banana-bandana,

and then both watch us break our asses

when we try the backflip. [laughter]

That's what I think you should go for.

It was such a great act, man. I loved it.

[cheers and applause] - Thank you.

- All right--[laughs]

So are you gonna take their advice

and make them do a backflip?

- No--[laughs]--as much as I'd like to see that,

I don't want them injured, so... - True.

- How kind of you. - Aww.

- Thank you so much. - Thank you, guys.

- But you do know that they figured out

how you did the trick? - Yes, yes, of course.

- Okay... - It was a wonderful act.

- Well, thank you for being so entertained.

- Thank you, Alyson.

- Yan Markson, ladies and gentlemen!

Thank you! - Thank you.

[cheers and applause]

- More magic coming up,

including an amazing performance by Penn and Teller.

[jazz music]

[jazz music]

[cheers and applause]

- Welcome back to "Fool Us."

Our next magician comes to us from Prague,

so let's Czech him out.

[fireworks explode]

- I'm Ondrej.

I come from Prague, Czech Republic.

And Prague is a very magical city,

and since I love magic, it's a perfect match.

We have a kind of nice magic community

back in Czech Republic,

but because of communism,

we stopped for about 30 years or so.

[growling]

I'm trying to bring world-class magicians to Prague,

because the close contact,

that's what teaches you the most.

The ultimate question is,

am I going to fool Penn and Teller?

No, I'm not.

I'm gonna try something else.

[Tchaikovsky's "Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy" plays]

[cheers and applause]

- Our next performer's name is so hard to pronounce,

I'm going to introduce him as though I were Teller.

[laughter, applause]

- Good evening.

Almost every card trick in the world starts with,

"Pick a card," and ends with, "Is this your card?"

And Penn and Teller have seen every one of those.

So I set out on a search around the world,

looking for someone who could help me

and give me a fighting chance

of fooling Penn and Teller here tonight.

After many months,

I finally found my guru.

Hidden away in the Carpathian Mountains,

who shared an ancient secret of magic with me

so complex, I confessed

I could not master it. [record scratch]

But he whispered to me,

"There was one person alive who could."

Alyson Hannigan.

[cheers and applause]

Alyson, would you please join me?

- What?

- And Penn, you too.

Right here, please. - Really? Huh...

I can't even say your name, and I'm the person? Really?

- Pleasure to meet you. I'm Ondrej.

- I know, hi, Ondrej. - Penn...

- Hello, sir, how are you? Nice to meet you.

- Penn, thank you for helping.

Would you please shuffle the cards?

- I'll give a try.

- Well, of course, the cards can be marked,

so I'm gonna be looking away

for the entire selection procedure.

- Okay. - And...

while I get lost in Alyson's eyes...

[laughter] Penn Jillette, sir, please,

pick a card... - I sure will.

- But don't show it to anybody.

Make sure you are the only one who sees it.

- I will. - But memorize the card.

Also, confirm that all the cards are different.

Yes? - Uh, yes, they are.

- Put the card back...

And immediately shuffle the cards.

- Okay.

- Alyson, it was a pleasure.

I'll look back now. - Okay.

- Penn, are you happy?

- Uh, yeah, I'm doing all right.

- Thank you so much. - There you go.

- Well, as I said,

it is impossible for me to find the card,

but Alyson can do it. [laughter]

Would you please come here? - [laughs]

- And put on these headphones.

- Ooh.

- And perform...

the secret card trick of Carpathia.

[laughter, applause]

[soft instrumental music]

- Okay, let's do it.

Magic... [laughter]

Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

[laughter] Magic.

[laughs]

- [laughs]

- Penn, what was your card?

- The eight of hearts.

- Give it up for Alyson Hannigan!

[cheers and applause]

You were wonderful. - Ah--[laughs] Aww.

- Fantastic. - Thank you!

Ondrej Psenicka!

- Do you think you fooled them? - [laughs] Here's hoping.

I think the flare of the ring flying off my--

- No, that was great.

- That was pretty awesome, right?

- That was unexpected. - [giggles] Yes.

You seem to have a unique approach to your performances.

- Oh, yes.

You know, I really feel that a lot of magicians,

they just steal the focus on them.

"Look what I can do," you know.

"Look how I can accomplish this."

But I really like when that goes to the audience,

to the spectator,

so look what you can do, Alyson.

- [giggles] - That was fantastic.

Wasn't she fantastic, by the way?

[cheers and applause]

- Thank you.

Aww, thank you.

Well, let's see if Penn and Teller were impressed.

Penn, Teller...

- Well, we don't wanna misgive credit.

You're just the vehicle here.

You're just some mountaintop guru that we're dealing with...

- [laughs] - And then to Alyson.

You're barely a catalyst on this.

I don't even know why I'm looking at you.

But your guru was very aware of the fact.

The person onstage has so many things to do,

they can't watch that carefully.

Your guru also knew that,

probably, if you picked me for this,

that I would know whether I had a free choice or not,

and I do think I had a free choice.

And if I didn't, you win.

I also think those cards are beautiful.

You know, we've looked at all kinds of cards,

and that's a beautiful deck, with the little--

are they butterflies or is it a Rorschach test

and actually my mother being attacked by a polar bear?

Were those butterflies in the back of--

- Yes, those are butterflies. - Very, very pretty deck.

I only got to look at it for a moment or two.

You got to look at it a lot.

I think looking at that deck is a great deal of fun for you.

And for Alyson,

I think that the headset really helped you key in

to what you were gonna do on that trick, didn't it?

- Maybe. - Yeah.

I don't wanna give you any credit,

'cause it was Alyson,

but Alyson, you did a wonderful, wonderful trick...

- Thank you.

- And I think with what I've said, you didn't fool us.

What do you think? - Could you just clarify

what exactly did I see when you said--

- Yes, we can.

Do you wanna just tell him in a couple words?

When the going gets tough, Penn and Teller become Teller.

[laughter]

- All right...

I don't know why Teller's ignoring me in this.

- Oh! [cheers and applause]

- I mean, it is my trick, but okay.

It's fine.

- Oh, now we're gonna discuss again?

- Oh, do you think I fooled them?

- Uh, you may have, actually.

- Hm.

Who gets the trophy?

[laughter]

- We have to sketch out what we think it is.

- Okay, okay. - It's a little bit too hard

to do it this way, but we think we've sketched it out here.

- Does it involve the ring?

- No, it does not involve the ring...

- 'Cause I thought that was pretty flashy.

- But, Alyson, uh... [cheers and applause]

You fooled everybody. - What? Yay!

[fireworks explode]

[cheers and applause]

We fooled them! - Thank you so much.

- Hey!

Awesome!

[cheers and applause]

[indistinct]

- Thank you. - Ondrej Psenicka!

Whoo! - Thank you.

- [giggles]

Well, it's official.

Penn and Teller have been fooled for the first time tonight.

We just might sneak another one by them

before the night is over.

Stay with us.

[jazz music]

[jazz music]

[cheers and applause]

- Welcome back.

One "Fool Us" trophy has already been awarded,

and we might give out another one

to this next magician. Take a look.

[fireworks explode]

- Hi, I'm Glenn Morphew. I'm from Orland Park, Illinois.

Back when I grew up, my brother brought a friend home.

His name was Joe.

And he says, "Joe does magic.

Would you guys like to see some magic?"

He did probably six, seven tricks,

really good ones.

Pretty much in a trance,

I walked to my bedroom,

got all the money I had to my name,

which was $26.

So I said, "This is all the money I have in the world.

"Would you please buy me whatever I need

"to be able to learn how to do

the kind of things that you were doing?"

So that was the beginning of it.

I'd do my homework after school, then I'd be up.

"Mom, Dad, pick a card, pick a card," you know,

so I'd drive 'em crazy.

The trick I'm gonna perform tonight,

it's a classic with an updated handling

and updated presentation,

and I'm really looking forward to performing.

[cheers and applause]

- Please welcome the deep-dish magic

of Chicago's Glenn Morphew!

[cheers and applause] - Thank you.

Alyson, could you do me a favor and come on over here?

I'm gonna need your help for a second.

What I need you to do is just write your name nice and big

right across the middle of each of these cards.

And it's important. I'll tell you why in a second.

- Okay. - Okay.

I'm exhausted.

I've been spending every waking moment,

and a lot of moments I should've been sleeping,

on studying Dr. Sheldon Cooper's work

on Einstein's theory of relativity,

as it relates to teleportation, worm holes,

black holes, mind power, and optical physics.

And I have to tell ya, this science stuff is complicated.

So I'm thinking, rather than discuss it,

I'm gonna demonstrate some of the things that I've learned.

So the first thing that's important

is that I want you to see

that there's nothing in my pocket, okay?

And I had Alyson sign these cards,

because it's important that science experiments

are done under test conditions.

So here's the cards that we're gonna use.

We have the ace, two,

three, four, five,

and the six of hearts.

So the experiment is basically this:

The cards are gonna teleport one at a time

from my hand to my pocket.

So right now, the ace is here.

In a second, it's gonna be over here.

So under the cover of darkness...

Shoo! The ace goes. [cheers and applause]

So I now just have the two, three, four,

five, and the six.

Now for those of you that aren't that familiar

with teleportation, basically here's what happens.

The ace had to dematerialize into its atomic constituents

while it was over here.

Then it rematerialized over here

in my previously- to-be-shown-empty pocket.

[cheers and applause] I know.

[smooth bass music]

I'm thinking as cool as that is,

can you imagine when people can do this?

I mean, let's say, for example, I'm the two.

I could be in Vegas one second,

and the next second I could be over here in,

let's call it Hawaii.

Aloha. [cheers and applause]

We're gonna do something entirely different

with the three.

I'm gonna take the three,

and I'm gonna trap it right here against my thigh,

because then I can work it right through a worm hole

in my pants.

Now this just leaves me with the four,

the five, and the six.

Now I'll be honest, it's a lot easier for me

to find these worm holes when I'm wearing my silk loungewear,

but hey, here's proof you can find worm holes in wool.

[cheers and applause]

All right, it's starting to get interesting.

We've got three down, three to go.

Now I'm gonna demonstrate optical physics,

and there's a good chance I'm the only guy you'll ever meet

that could demonstrate this,

because what I have to do is move my arm

back and forth so fast,

it just looks like it's moving super slow.

[laughter]

That's what most people do. They tend not to believe me,

which kinda ticks me off, but people start to believe

once they see I just have the five and the six left.

See, what they fail to realize is while they were sitting there

thinking, "Yeah, right, this guy's full of [bleep],"

they missed the moment when faster

than the human eye can follow,

I slipped the four into my pocket.

[cheers and applause]

Now I'm gonna demonstrate telepathic teleportation,

even though it wears me out.

I have to concentrate, focus, visualize.

Yes.

And I send the five.

Now in this case, I didn't send the five

to the right-front pocket.

I figured I'd send it to the left-rear pocket,

because hey, I've got a vivid imagination.

[cheers and applause] Now when I clap...

I send the six to a black hole somewhere in the universe.

It's gone forever, but not forgotten.

And I'll be honest, I sent the six by clapping,

because I figured, hey,

when you get to witness teleportation,

worm holes, black holes, mind power, and optical physics,

you should clap, if not for me,

certainly for Dr. Cooper and Dr. Einstein,

because without those two guys,

I wouldn't have been able to show you any of this.

Thank you. [cheers and applause]

- Glenn Morphew, everyone!

Wow...

Whoa.

I don't know how you did that. - [laughs]

- I wonder if they do. [laughter]

How long have you been doing this?

- This particular trick... - Yeah.

- I put together about two and a half years ago.

- Wow, and then when you get the call,

"Like, okay, you're coming on the show,"

did you immediately know you wanted to do this trick?

- Yeah, yeah, this is one-- it's a classic.

It used to be, as a magician in the 1900s

up to the 1930s, 40s, everybody did this trick.

And how you were judged was how well you did the trick.

- I mean, obviously, you say it's that old,

so they've clearly seen it before.

- They've seen versions of it. - Right.

- They haven't seen this one. - Oh, good.

All right, well, let's see what they think.

Boys?

- The idea of a tough guy,

who's also a learned gentleman,

is just a wonderful thing to see onstage.

- Oh. - It's a beautiful character.

The way you carried it is just gorgeous.

It's a classic of magic, cards to pocket,

which we've seen a zillion times,

but you had the cards signed.

You had Alyson sign each and every card,

which gives the impression that she examined 'em,

you know, 'cause she signs 'em. - Mm-hm.

- You know, she signs 'em, makes it all on the up and up.

And then the routine,

we've been going through it and dissecting it

with notes and notes and notes.

You do our favorite thing in magic,

the thing that has to be done in magic,

which is, you're repeating the exact same thing

over and over again,

and you never do it the same way twice.

So every time you do the next trick,

it cancels out the trick before.

You're always cancelling.

Obviously, everybody--

there's palming going on in this,

but it is such good palming,

and always when the people think it's not.

Every time we think you got it palmed,

you're flashing that you're not.

It's in very sneaky places. No one saw that.

Wonderful, wonderful sleight of hand.

Sometimes, one card is going into the pocket,

sometimes two.

Sometimes, you have cards here that look like

more than they are,

but it moves across and cancels it.

We think--with all those steps,

we think we kinda sorta followed it,

but boy, did we love it. It was just great in every step.

[cheers and applause] Do I have to, uh--

- So are you convinced

that they know all your tricks?

- Well, I think they've been studying

Dr. Sheldon Cooper's work too.

[laughter]

- Ladies and gentlemen, Glenn Morphew!

- Thank you so much. Thank you.

[cheers and applause]

- Back with the best magic on TV.

More "Fool Us" after this.

[jazz music]

[jazz music]

[cheers and applause]

- Penn and Teller have been performing

thousands of tricks in front of millions of people,

and they show no signs of slowing down.

Here to close out tonight's show,

Penn and Teller!

[cheers and applause]

- There's a Russian saying,

which is, "Think it; don't say it.

"Say it; don't write it.

Write it; don't be surprised."

And that's used a lot in computer hacking.

If you have a computer password,

do not write it down.

There's a piece of paper in this bottle.

Now we need someone in the audience,

no kidding, who's willing to give up

his or her real computer password,

a real computer password that they've used.

Not a jive one, not a silly one,

but a real computer password.

Okay, you're willing to give up your real password?

Come up here, yeah. Right up here.

You fool. Right up here, yeah.

If I knew your name,

there's some sort of social phishing I could do,

so I'm not gonna use your name.

I'm gonna call you Edward Snowden, okay?

[laughter] Right over here, Snowden.

Now you see, there's a piece of paper in that bottle.

You can see one or two characters on it,

but you can't read the whole thing.

That seems pretty safe.

It seems like that written down,

you wouldn't be able to figure it out,

but once you write something down,

by the techniques of surveillance in our country,

and also by magic techniques,

someone can figure it out.

I'm gonna take this and put it right here,

and Teller's gonna raise it up.

Now there's about 500 of you in the audience.

I don't wanna pick one of you to do this,

but decide among yourselves.

You can draw straws, or do rock, paper, scissors,

but pick one person in the audience

to stare at that bottle for the whole trick, okay?

[laughter] It'll be important,

while the rest of us are watching this trick.

Now you said you would give up your real password, okay.

We only want eight digits.

Is your password longer than eight digits?

- No, I have one that's eight. - Eight characters?

- Yes. - Okay.

Give us your eight character password

right here, Snowden, would you please?

- Capital S. - Capital S.

- I. - I.

- Lowercase I. [giggles] - Okay, there you go, I.

- Lowercase O.

- O. - E.

- E. - Lowercase V.

- Okay, good.

- E.

R.

- One. - One.

How do you pronounce that?

- Sio-ever-one. [chuckles] Yeah.

- Sio-ever-one. Now this is not, as you know,

a perfect password,

because in here you have the word "ever," right?

Which could be searched, which would you give you

only these other four to figure out.

So we're gonna replace three of the characters here.

You pick which three of the characters

in your real password you want to replace.

- I's and the E's. - The I

and the E's-- and the two E's

we'll take out right there.

Now that'll make us an unbreakable password.

We're gonna replace two of those with numbers,

and the only way we get random numbers in Vegas

is with tumbling dice. Here you go.

Throw these back to me right now, would you please?

Just throw 'em back. Bounce 'em around,

throw 'em right back up here.

Tumbling dice, right up here.

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

And Snowden, I don't wanna even touch these.

I want you to see I'm doing it all fair.

What number is that, Snowden?

- Six. - That's a six.

Where would you like that six to go?

Which one do you want to replace?

The last E?

- Yes. - The six right there.

And this one way over here, Snowden.

Watch me, so I'm doing nothing tricky.

I'm picking this up; I'm leaning it forward.

What number is that, Snowden?

- A three. - A three right there.

Okay, and where do you want that three to go, Snowden?

- In the front.

- Three right there.

Now we need a mark of punctuation, okay.

Any sort of mark of punctuation,

a question mark, quotation marks, anything.

I'm gonna pick--well, I just quoted the Rolling Stones.

You're wearing a "Sticky Fingers" T-shirt right there.

Give me any mark of punctuation you want.

- Question mark. - A question mark, he says.

We'll put the question mark right there.

Now there's our unbreakable password.

S-3-o-?-v-6-r-1.

That's a pretty good, pretty deep password.

Now if you need a quick down and dirty password,

one of the things you can use is your porn name...

[laughter] The name you use

when you do pornographic videos.

And the way you generate your porn name is very easy.

Your first name, your given name,

is the name of a pet you had when you were a child.

And the last name, the surname,

is the name of the street you grew up on.

You can generate really quickly that way,

remember it really quickly, and it's pretty hard to break.

For instance, in my case, when I was a child,

we had a kitty-cat by the name of Ron,

and we grew up on Jeremy Street.

So that's the way you would generate

your porn name, just like that.

Now, Snowden, I want you to come over here.

Take this piece of plastic with me,

and take that side that says "stage right."

Hold that in your left hand, if you would, please,

your left hand,

and kind of center it under there.

Now someone in the audience tonight

has been staring at that bottle.

It just went up and down.

Nothing else changed.

Watch this carefully, Snowden. Watch it very, very carefully

through the plastic, Snowden.

[glass shatters]

Now, Snowden, I don't need to tell you

that Teller is one of the finest

sleight of hand artists in the world.

I do a little magic myself.

Also, I play upright bebop bass,

and I'm a juggler.

Let me ask you something, Snowden,

are you a brain surgeon? - No.

- Okay, you have the least to lose.

Reach into the broken glass... [laughter]

Right there.

Big white piece of paper there.

Pull that out there, Snowden.

Now I want you to see this, Snowden.

My hands are empty.

With me...

open that out,

and you take that side

and put it right over your old password,

and we'll see the unbreakable password.

S-3-o-?-v-6-r-1.

[cheers and applause]

That's your new password. Totally unbreakable.

Thank you so much.

Edward Snowden!

American hero right there. [cheers and applause]

- Ah!

This is Vegas, so you know we could go all night,

but CW has cut us off,

so rest up and come back for more "Fool Us" next week.

See ya soon.

[cheers and applause]

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