1 00:00:09,526 --> 00:00:11,611 [ wind gusts, waves crash ] 2 00:00:11,695 --> 00:00:13,863 ROSEMARY: Hey, Jacinta. 3 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:17,924 [ children laugh ] 4 00:00:17,949 --> 00:00:19,117 WOMAN: Say hi. 5 00:00:19,142 --> 00:00:21,819 CHILDREN: Hi! 6 00:00:21,849 --> 00:00:24,097 ROSEMARY: And these are the criminals. 7 00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:26,443 They will never get out from my jail. 8 00:00:26,462 --> 00:00:28,381 BOY: Help me! Help me! Let me out. 9 00:00:28,448 --> 00:00:31,868 [ children shouting ] 10 00:00:31,893 --> 00:00:33,789 RICH: That's the record button. Yep. 11 00:00:33,814 --> 00:00:35,076 ROSEMARY: Is that what it's saying? 12 00:00:35,101 --> 00:00:37,120 RICH: That's what it be saying. 13 00:00:37,709 --> 00:00:39,145 Are you a silly-willy? 14 00:00:39,179 --> 00:00:40,847 ROSEMARY: Yep. 15 00:00:40,889 --> 00:00:43,723 JACINTA: My dad explained to me, 16 00:00:43,748 --> 00:00:46,590 when you're an infant and you cry, 17 00:00:47,464 --> 00:00:50,036 your mom picks you up and comforts you. 18 00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:53,470 When I was an infant 19 00:00:53,485 --> 00:00:55,209 my mom cried. 20 00:00:55,237 --> 00:00:57,656 She picked me up for comfort. 21 00:00:58,031 --> 00:01:01,284 [ somber music plays ] 22 00:01:01,309 --> 00:01:08,827 ♪♪ 23 00:01:08,861 --> 00:01:13,659 ♪♪ 24 00:01:13,684 --> 00:01:18,555 [ indistinct conversations ] 25 00:01:23,588 --> 00:01:26,758 [ TV plays indistinctly ] 26 00:01:26,783 --> 00:01:34,123 ♪♪ 27 00:01:34,151 --> 00:01:41,575 ♪♪ 28 00:01:43,785 --> 00:01:45,120 - Should I put my hair up? 29 00:01:45,145 --> 00:01:48,469 I never put my hair up. 30 00:01:48,494 --> 00:01:50,037 Yes? No? 31 00:01:50,062 --> 00:01:51,297 - What? 32 00:01:51,322 --> 00:01:52,752 - Should I do the '90s thing? 33 00:01:52,777 --> 00:01:53,955 Like this? 34 00:01:53,980 --> 00:01:55,231 - Oh, my God. 35 00:01:55,255 --> 00:01:56,342 - Hey, girl. 36 00:01:56,367 --> 00:01:57,952 You looking kind of good! 37 00:01:58,008 --> 00:01:59,593 What's your name? [ laughs ] 38 00:01:59,618 --> 00:02:01,611 - Stop. No. 39 00:02:06,933 --> 00:02:10,474 JACINTA: I've been in for eight months... 40 00:02:10,479 --> 00:02:13,774 and I have a month left of my sentence. 41 00:02:14,094 --> 00:02:15,847 Thank you. 42 00:02:15,859 --> 00:02:19,218 My first time being incarcerated... 43 00:02:19,243 --> 00:02:22,429 I think I was 15. 44 00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:24,995 I'm 26, 45 00:02:25,020 --> 00:02:28,774 and there hasn't been many breaks in between. 46 00:02:31,859 --> 00:02:33,277 WOMAN: Pitch five. 47 00:02:34,048 --> 00:02:35,383 Get it! Yep! 48 00:02:35,408 --> 00:02:39,162 [ indistinct conversations ] 49 00:02:40,542 --> 00:02:43,266 - I'm trying not to be seen 50 00:02:43,303 --> 00:02:47,563 because I've already been warned at the window for talking. 51 00:02:47,647 --> 00:02:51,401 And so if I'm seen, I'm gonna get a write-up. 52 00:02:53,172 --> 00:02:54,793 What are you doing, Ma? 53 00:02:57,067 --> 00:02:59,695 I don't want to get caught at your window. 54 00:03:01,154 --> 00:03:03,489 ROSEMARY: Alright. I don't want to get you in trouble. 55 00:03:03,514 --> 00:03:05,520 JACINTA: Alright. I love you, Mom. 56 00:03:05,575 --> 00:03:07,493 ROSEMARY: I love you, too. 57 00:03:08,527 --> 00:03:09,624 Are you still making it? 58 00:03:09,812 --> 00:03:12,124 - Yep, at noon time. 59 00:03:13,823 --> 00:03:16,669 [ indistinct shouting, cheering ] 60 00:03:16,712 --> 00:03:19,089 - Run! Run, Bridget! 61 00:03:20,661 --> 00:03:22,705 - Go ahead! - You flinched. 62 00:03:22,730 --> 00:03:23,944 - Go ahead. 63 00:03:23,969 --> 00:03:26,032 I only flinched 'cause I didn't want to hurt you. 64 00:03:26,057 --> 00:03:27,387 [ both laugh ] 65 00:03:27,431 --> 00:03:29,433 - Save it. 66 00:03:29,474 --> 00:03:31,253 [ women cheer ] 67 00:03:31,278 --> 00:03:33,803 - You're a big baby, I swear. 68 00:03:33,828 --> 00:03:35,037 [ laughs ] 69 00:03:35,062 --> 00:03:36,257 - Abuse. 70 00:03:36,282 --> 00:03:37,689 [ women cheering ] 71 00:03:37,714 --> 00:03:39,614 I called my mother a bitch once, right? 72 00:03:39,639 --> 00:03:41,563 She smacks me in the mouth, and I -- 73 00:03:41,588 --> 00:03:43,047 - I didn't smack you in the mouth. 74 00:03:43,071 --> 00:03:44,614 That ain't exactly -- Don't lie. Don't you lie. 75 00:03:44,642 --> 00:03:45,939 You went... You're like this. 76 00:03:45,949 --> 00:03:47,701 You said, "I should smash you, bitch," 77 00:03:47,726 --> 00:03:48,935 is what you said. 78 00:03:48,952 --> 00:03:50,344 - She smacked me in the mouth. 79 00:03:50,369 --> 00:03:52,562 - Tell the whole story. - And cried. 80 00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:54,985 - [ chuckles ] 81 00:03:54,995 --> 00:03:56,621 JACINTA: Listen, Joanne, 82 00:03:56,646 --> 00:03:58,196 she calls my mom at like 2:00 in the morning. 83 00:03:58,221 --> 00:03:59,819 She's like, "Your daughter ripped me off." 84 00:03:59,823 --> 00:04:01,658 ROSEMARY: I remember that. - "I'm gonna whoop her ass." 85 00:04:01,683 --> 00:04:04,995 I hear my mom's truck coming, 86 00:04:05,010 --> 00:04:08,728 flying down Pine Street at fuckin' 2:00 in the morning, 87 00:04:08,764 --> 00:04:10,543 blaring REO Speedwagon 88 00:04:10,557 --> 00:04:12,543 Take It On The Run, right? [ laughs ] 89 00:04:12,568 --> 00:04:14,987 I'm like, "Yep, here comes my mom." 90 00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:18,008 So, she's up in -- - You weren't even there yet. 91 00:04:18,033 --> 00:04:19,844 I was already there, and I'm calling Jacinta, 92 00:04:19,869 --> 00:04:21,955 and she said, "Mom, I'm gonna be there in two minutes." 93 00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:23,764 I'm pissed. 94 00:04:23,795 --> 00:04:27,228 - I was in the alley taking a couple of hits. 95 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:29,346 This girl peeps my mom coming through the door. 96 00:04:29,353 --> 00:04:31,083 She goes "Yeah. Yeah, you, Rosemary." 97 00:04:31,328 --> 00:04:34,247 My mom grabs her and starts beating the fuck out of her, 98 00:04:34,272 --> 00:04:36,338 like boom, boom, boom. 99 00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:37,698 Stomps her, like, a couple of times. 100 00:04:37,723 --> 00:04:39,705 Just stomping this bitch, right? 101 00:04:39,711 --> 00:04:42,133 She turns around. She's like "Hey." 102 00:04:42,158 --> 00:04:44,060 I'm like hey. 103 00:04:44,119 --> 00:04:46,094 My mom stomps her one more time. 104 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:47,443 She goes, "What are you going to do?" 105 00:04:47,468 --> 00:04:50,290 - I'm like, uh... WOMAN: Oh, my God! 106 00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:51,588 - I'm like, what are you doing? 107 00:04:51,613 --> 00:04:53,623 - I was like, "Well, I was gonna hit her, Mom." 108 00:04:53,662 --> 00:04:56,571 She stomps her again. That was it. 109 00:04:56,596 --> 00:04:58,611 My mom goes, "Let's go." She goes, "Wait, wait, wait. 110 00:04:58,647 --> 00:05:00,793 Run her pockets. Run her pockets." 111 00:05:00,818 --> 00:05:02,779 I was like, "She gave me all her money. 112 00:05:02,804 --> 00:05:04,197 I ripped her off, remember?" 113 00:05:04,236 --> 00:05:06,471 She goes, "Oh, yeah. Let's go." 114 00:05:06,496 --> 00:05:08,331 The first time I ever got into a fight, 115 00:05:08,365 --> 00:05:10,244 I got beat up really bad, 116 00:05:10,283 --> 00:05:12,535 and I went home crying to my mom, 117 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,904 and she was like, "Don't ever come home like this again." 118 00:05:14,929 --> 00:05:16,839 And she brought me back, and she made me fight her again, 119 00:05:16,859 --> 00:05:18,300 and I beat her up. 120 00:05:18,364 --> 00:05:21,777 And I got this sense of empowerment. 121 00:05:21,809 --> 00:05:23,936 At this point, like, I knew. 122 00:05:23,961 --> 00:05:27,048 And when I was beating her up, 123 00:05:27,073 --> 00:05:29,117 I was going like this. Like, I didn't -- 124 00:05:29,142 --> 00:05:31,372 I was afraid she was gonna hit me again, 125 00:05:31,397 --> 00:05:33,607 and my mom kept making me look at her 126 00:05:33,632 --> 00:05:35,185 when I was hitting her. 127 00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:37,437 And once I got that burst of empowerment, 128 00:05:37,477 --> 00:05:39,702 I was like, "Yeah, I'm never gonna let this go." 129 00:05:40,022 --> 00:05:41,022 [ laughter ] 130 00:05:42,886 --> 00:05:44,012 - Go. 131 00:05:44,037 --> 00:05:45,601 WOMAN: Oh, man. 132 00:05:45,610 --> 00:05:47,257 - Go ahead. Let me give it to you. 133 00:05:47,279 --> 00:05:48,614 Take it, Mom. Take it. 134 00:05:48,639 --> 00:05:50,376 - Oh, to me. Is it my turn? 135 00:05:50,407 --> 00:05:52,659 - Yeah. 136 00:06:00,859 --> 00:06:03,279 [ both laugh ] 137 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:10,186 JACINTA: I could be having just, like, a full storm of emotions 138 00:06:10,218 --> 00:06:12,929 going on inside me. 139 00:06:12,954 --> 00:06:16,211 My mom can just kind of look 140 00:06:16,224 --> 00:06:18,402 and just be like, "What's going on?" 141 00:06:18,435 --> 00:06:22,481 I'm able to just tell her. 142 00:06:22,513 --> 00:06:24,057 She knows about addiction. 143 00:06:24,066 --> 00:06:25,734 She knows about incarceration. 144 00:06:25,759 --> 00:06:27,324 She knows about... 145 00:06:27,361 --> 00:06:28,511 everything. 146 00:06:32,074 --> 00:06:34,076 - A man is facing multiple charges 147 00:06:34,101 --> 00:06:37,199 after police say they busted him with a pound of pot. 148 00:06:37,224 --> 00:06:40,415 Police say they found those drugs during... 149 00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:43,943 ROSEMARY: I did them with a needle and thread. 150 00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:45,654 I just sat there one day and went like this. 151 00:06:47,069 --> 00:06:48,404 I don't know why. 152 00:06:48,429 --> 00:06:49,637 I was just young. 153 00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,889 And then I got Jacinta's name over here. 154 00:06:53,011 --> 00:06:56,931 And then I've got Jacinta's daughter's name over here. 155 00:06:59,226 --> 00:07:01,645 EARNSHAW: How old were you when you had your kids? 156 00:07:01,670 --> 00:07:04,602 - I was 14 when I got pregnant with Todd, 157 00:07:05,322 --> 00:07:07,805 had him when I was 15, 158 00:07:07,830 --> 00:07:13,448 and I was 16, 17 when I had Jacinta, 159 00:07:13,473 --> 00:07:16,393 and 18 when I had my son, Shaun. 160 00:07:16,418 --> 00:07:19,996 Then, I had a hysterectomy due to a rape when I -- 161 00:07:20,021 --> 00:07:22,023 When I was 20, 162 00:07:22,048 --> 00:07:24,304 I had a hysterectomy due to a rape. 163 00:07:24,329 --> 00:07:25,831 So I couldn't have kids after that. 164 00:07:25,836 --> 00:07:29,105 So got lucky that I had my kids. 165 00:07:31,174 --> 00:07:34,545 Those are my two boys, Todd and Shaun, 166 00:07:34,553 --> 00:07:37,491 and their two daughters. 167 00:07:37,516 --> 00:07:40,411 That's my granddaughter, Caylynn. 168 00:07:41,373 --> 00:07:44,312 Jacinta here. [ laughs ] 169 00:07:44,337 --> 00:07:46,739 I feel that when she leaves, it's, like... 170 00:07:46,764 --> 00:07:48,265 is it goodbye? 171 00:07:48,290 --> 00:07:50,496 [ voice breaking ] It kills me. 172 00:07:50,521 --> 00:07:53,526 And with the heroin going on, 173 00:07:53,551 --> 00:07:55,207 I keep saying to her, "Jacint..." 174 00:07:55,232 --> 00:07:58,156 I said, "You can't use, 175 00:07:58,228 --> 00:08:00,898 because the addiction is gonna suck you in, 176 00:08:00,912 --> 00:08:04,983 and the heroin that people are selling now is -- 177 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:06,605 It's not heroin. 178 00:08:06,626 --> 00:08:09,070 It's a -- It's a drug that's gonna kill you." 179 00:08:11,366 --> 00:08:12,746 So, it's like, 180 00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:15,537 "I don't even wanna see her leave." 181 00:08:15,577 --> 00:08:17,454 I wish she could just stay here... 182 00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:20,459 [ sniffles ] 183 00:08:20,515 --> 00:08:23,518 ...and wait for me. 184 00:08:53,423 --> 00:08:56,843 JACINTA: Crafts, just to help me forget what's going on... 185 00:08:57,788 --> 00:09:00,457 but I miss my daughter. 186 00:09:01,946 --> 00:09:05,009 It says, "I love you yesterday, tomorrow, and today. 187 00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:06,797 Family together at heart, 188 00:09:06,811 --> 00:09:08,563 even in distance never apart." 189 00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:12,170 And I never send them. 190 00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:15,305 I don't know why. 191 00:09:20,084 --> 00:09:22,519 Sometimes, I just feel like she's okay without me, though. 192 00:09:22,544 --> 00:09:26,214 [ sentimental music plays ] 193 00:09:26,239 --> 00:09:31,745 ♪♪ 194 00:09:31,753 --> 00:09:38,402 ♪♪ 195 00:09:38,441 --> 00:09:40,131 My mother has another three years left 196 00:09:40,137 --> 00:09:41,554 of her sentence. 197 00:09:43,432 --> 00:09:45,725 I feel guilty. 198 00:09:46,184 --> 00:09:47,910 There's really no way to prepare 199 00:09:47,935 --> 00:09:50,270 for leaving her. 200 00:09:57,806 --> 00:10:00,141 [ insects chirping ] 201 00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:16,674 WOMAN: Good luck. 202 00:10:16,715 --> 00:10:18,091 - Thanks. 203 00:10:19,253 --> 00:10:21,589 WOMAN Stay outta here. 204 00:10:26,627 --> 00:10:28,629 ROSEMARY: Okay? 205 00:10:30,370 --> 00:10:32,372 I love you. 206 00:10:32,397 --> 00:10:34,710 JACINTA: I love you. 207 00:10:36,072 --> 00:10:38,155 [ voice breaking ] Go, Mom. 208 00:10:38,180 --> 00:10:40,599 ROSEMARY: You go. 209 00:10:40,630 --> 00:10:42,465 Stay strong. 210 00:10:52,261 --> 00:10:54,430 - I love you, Mom. 211 00:10:59,326 --> 00:11:03,858 [ police radio chatter ] 212 00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:09,114 Fucking stop it from happening! 213 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,078 [ sobbing ] 214 00:11:11,103 --> 00:11:12,992 OFFICER: You're almost out. 215 00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:14,756 Don't do that. 216 00:11:26,785 --> 00:11:28,392 - There they are. 217 00:11:28,412 --> 00:11:30,748 OFFICER JACINTA: Yep. 218 00:11:31,748 --> 00:11:34,208 OFFICER Good luck. Stay out of here. 219 00:11:41,859 --> 00:11:43,527 [ engine starts ] 220 00:11:43,552 --> 00:11:46,138 - You look good. JACINTA: Thank you, you too. 221 00:11:46,163 --> 00:11:47,447 - Damn. RICK: Hey, baby. 222 00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:49,209 - Hi, Daddy. 223 00:11:55,890 --> 00:11:58,468 You okay? 224 00:11:58,493 --> 00:11:59,997 - What are you crying for? I'm going home now. 225 00:12:00,027 --> 00:12:03,781 - I'm happy. I'm happy. I'm happy. 226 00:12:03,814 --> 00:12:05,367 JACINTA: You're excited. 227 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:06,977 RICK: Yeah. 228 00:12:08,578 --> 00:12:09,913 - You look good. 229 00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:12,733 [ radio plays indistinctly ] 230 00:12:12,748 --> 00:12:16,711 DEEJAY: WYMZ, WYMZ HD, South Portland. 231 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,903 - Do it again. Aaah! 232 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:21,948 THE ALLMAN BROTHERS: ♪ And when it's time for leavin' ♪ 233 00:12:21,973 --> 00:12:23,349 ♪ I hope you'll understand ♪ 234 00:12:23,374 --> 00:12:25,919 - I don't understand these people around here. 235 00:12:26,006 --> 00:12:28,266 What is wrong with letting somebody in? 236 00:12:28,972 --> 00:12:31,310 - It's not -- It's closed. 237 00:12:31,335 --> 00:12:32,726 - It's not closed. 238 00:12:32,751 --> 00:12:34,078 You just have to... 239 00:12:34,783 --> 00:12:36,615 SHAWN: I can't do it. JACINTA: Yeah, you can. 240 00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:38,008 SHAWN: No, I can't. 241 00:12:38,026 --> 00:12:39,026 - Just do it. 242 00:12:39,051 --> 00:12:40,325 - Aw, man. 243 00:12:40,932 --> 00:12:42,851 Jacinta... 244 00:12:44,862 --> 00:12:46,156 I can't do it. I can't do it. 245 00:12:46,186 --> 00:12:47,687 - I felt it. It was in. 246 00:12:47,712 --> 00:12:50,693 SHAWN: Yeah, halfway. Not the back. 247 00:12:50,718 --> 00:12:52,281 You ready? - Yeah. 248 00:12:52,306 --> 00:12:53,686 - Oh, it went through. 249 00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:55,271 - See? 250 00:12:59,378 --> 00:13:01,297 - This is delicious. 251 00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:03,450 It don't even feel real, does it? 252 00:13:04,341 --> 00:13:06,963 - It's a cinnamon bun. 253 00:13:07,021 --> 00:13:09,154 No, I'm talking about being out. 254 00:13:09,623 --> 00:13:10,941 - What are you talking about? 255 00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:13,090 - I'm not talking about the food. 256 00:13:21,369 --> 00:13:23,791 WOMAN: Living room, office, 257 00:13:23,816 --> 00:13:26,659 meditation room. 258 00:13:26,684 --> 00:13:28,002 - It's so pretty. 259 00:13:28,031 --> 00:13:29,495 WOMAN: Aw, thanks. 260 00:13:29,533 --> 00:13:31,659 - And so this is the other available spot, 261 00:13:31,702 --> 00:13:34,240 and then this has its own entry and staircase. 262 00:13:34,246 --> 00:13:36,164 So you can choose whichever room. 263 00:13:36,189 --> 00:13:37,815 - I like this room right here. - This one? 264 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:39,107 - Yeah. - Okay. Yeah. 265 00:13:39,126 --> 00:13:41,170 So, we'll just bring your stuff up. 266 00:13:42,546 --> 00:13:45,213 Is she going to be okay with my daughter? 267 00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:47,785 That's the only question that I would have. 268 00:13:47,786 --> 00:13:49,518 WOMAN: Katie? She's right there. Ask her. 269 00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:51,999 KATIE: Like, staying the night? - I asked her today. 270 00:13:52,038 --> 00:13:53,890 She doesn't really want to stay the night right away. 271 00:13:53,915 --> 00:13:55,308 So, it it probably -- if it would be, 272 00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:57,376 it wouldn't be for a while. KATIE: Yeah. 273 00:13:57,401 --> 00:13:59,257 WOMAN: And then, there's a sleeper couch 274 00:13:59,288 --> 00:14:02,000 down here, too, if she did. 275 00:14:02,025 --> 00:14:03,647 - Yeah, I mean, that's fine, yeah. 276 00:14:03,672 --> 00:14:05,022 - She said she would want to come visit, 277 00:14:05,061 --> 00:14:08,439 but... she was like, "Yeah, no. 278 00:14:08,471 --> 00:14:09,746 I don't want to really stay the night." 279 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:13,020 So, she's also kind of like, 280 00:14:13,042 --> 00:14:14,710 "Well, I don't want to get comfortable. 281 00:14:14,735 --> 00:14:16,254 I don't even know if you're gonna stay clean. 282 00:14:16,288 --> 00:14:18,124 So I can't really -- 283 00:14:18,162 --> 00:14:19,627 WOMAN: Fair enough, right? - Yeah. 284 00:14:19,652 --> 00:14:22,168 WOMAN you stay clean out here. 285 00:14:22,193 --> 00:14:23,865 JACINTA: [ chuckles ] - Mama will make sure you do. 286 00:14:23,890 --> 00:14:25,023 JACINTA: Thanks. Okay. 287 00:14:25,048 --> 00:14:26,791 WOMAN: Yeah. 288 00:14:27,268 --> 00:14:28,590 Tuesday night is house night, 289 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:30,746 so we have our house meeting here, 290 00:14:30,761 --> 00:14:32,977 where I meet with all the residents. 291 00:14:33,012 --> 00:14:35,672 We talk about any house issues, assign chores, 292 00:14:35,682 --> 00:14:37,411 whatever we need to do. RICK: Yep. 293 00:14:37,448 --> 00:14:41,621 - And then Friday night is a mandatory AA meeting here 294 00:14:41,646 --> 00:14:44,038 in Gorham that they all go to. - Which we love. 295 00:14:44,063 --> 00:14:45,535 WOMAN: Good. WOMAN 296 00:14:45,567 --> 00:14:47,401 WOMAN: So, there's plenty of meeting. 297 00:14:48,705 --> 00:14:50,164 WOMAN 298 00:14:50,189 --> 00:14:51,918 [ chuckles ] 299 00:14:52,313 --> 00:14:54,453 [ engine starts ] - She seems alright. 300 00:14:54,478 --> 00:14:56,317 WOMAN 301 00:14:56,361 --> 00:14:58,363 She works here on Tuesday -- - So is this staffed at night? 302 00:14:58,388 --> 00:14:59,747 - No. 303 00:15:00,315 --> 00:15:01,665 Not at all. 304 00:15:01,692 --> 00:15:04,154 - No, but there's cameras every place, Jacinta. 305 00:15:04,191 --> 00:15:05,508 - Dad, that's not what I was thinking. 306 00:15:05,537 --> 00:15:07,497 - Okay. I'm just letting you know. 307 00:15:07,530 --> 00:15:09,087 - You won't be doing anything 308 00:15:09,112 --> 00:15:10,490 you'd be getting told on, anyways. 309 00:15:10,515 --> 00:15:11,924 - No, she won't 'cause I'll kick her ass. 310 00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:13,705 - No, that's not -- - Her brother will kick her ass. 311 00:15:13,750 --> 00:15:15,231 - I will kick her ass. 312 00:15:15,256 --> 00:15:16,533 RICK: Daddy can see everything. 313 00:15:16,558 --> 00:15:18,933 - No, we all see everything. 314 00:15:24,829 --> 00:15:28,749 [ TV plays indistinctly ] 315 00:15:32,125 --> 00:15:34,419 - Yeah, But I'm your star pupil. 316 00:15:34,502 --> 00:15:36,671 - No one comes even closer. 317 00:15:36,755 --> 00:15:41,113 I've been tutoring Franky for the last 12 months. 318 00:15:41,733 --> 00:15:46,154 WOMAN: Sometimes, you only get one second chance, you know? 319 00:15:47,879 --> 00:15:49,380 Then if you're go and use again, 320 00:15:49,423 --> 00:15:52,300 there may not be, 321 00:15:52,325 --> 00:15:55,681 you know, a second chance, 'cause you may not live. 322 00:15:55,706 --> 00:15:57,104 [ scoffs ] 323 00:15:57,519 --> 00:16:00,172 A guy was telling me, a friend that came out used, 324 00:16:00,197 --> 00:16:03,009 and... she died 325 00:16:03,020 --> 00:16:05,180 after being in county for four months. 326 00:16:05,205 --> 00:16:06,990 She used once, and she's dead. 327 00:16:07,015 --> 00:16:09,167 She was only 27 years old, 328 00:16:09,192 --> 00:16:12,887 leaving behind a 10-year-old son and a 4-year-old daughter. 329 00:16:14,433 --> 00:16:15,851 Yep. 330 00:16:23,321 --> 00:16:25,767 [ camera shutter clicks ] 331 00:16:25,792 --> 00:16:27,657 [ camera shutter clicks ] 332 00:16:29,781 --> 00:16:32,470 JACINTA: Every other time I've gotten out, 333 00:16:32,508 --> 00:16:34,195 I use heroin. 334 00:16:34,718 --> 00:16:37,203 Didn't miss a beat. 335 00:16:37,228 --> 00:16:39,263 It's all I know. 336 00:16:41,570 --> 00:16:44,888 I haven't seen my daughter in 10 months. 337 00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:46,673 I'm excited, 338 00:16:46,730 --> 00:16:48,814 but I need to feel strong enough. 339 00:16:48,839 --> 00:16:50,966 [ music plays indistinctly ] 340 00:16:53,406 --> 00:16:55,658 ANNOUNCER: A salute to this great country 341 00:16:55,683 --> 00:16:57,897 is coming up a little bit later on, 342 00:16:57,908 --> 00:17:00,507 plus the best fireworks display. 343 00:17:00,532 --> 00:17:02,496 We're glad you're here! 344 00:17:02,521 --> 00:17:04,566 - Breaking all the rules. 345 00:17:04,589 --> 00:17:06,767 WOMAN: Who? - [ chuckles ] 346 00:17:06,791 --> 00:17:09,181 ANNOUNCER: Bonnie Harrison in car number 12. 347 00:17:09,206 --> 00:17:10,478 Make some noise! 348 00:17:10,503 --> 00:17:12,672 [ cheers and applause ] 349 00:17:15,842 --> 00:17:18,345 - I'm with the sober house. 350 00:17:25,352 --> 00:17:27,908 I had Caylynn when I was 16. 351 00:17:28,630 --> 00:17:30,981 When she was just 3 years old, 352 00:17:31,006 --> 00:17:34,355 I was at St. Audrey's Group Home with Caylynn. 353 00:17:35,270 --> 00:17:37,669 I was on like six or seven meds. 354 00:17:38,841 --> 00:17:41,355 I had been on lithium since I was 14 years old. 355 00:17:42,062 --> 00:17:44,067 The youth center put me on it. 356 00:17:45,524 --> 00:17:48,013 I got lithium intoxication. My kidneys shut down. 357 00:17:49,126 --> 00:17:51,490 They took me off all my medications. 358 00:17:52,802 --> 00:17:55,948 Coming off all those meds was just too much. 359 00:17:58,104 --> 00:17:59,457 I asked her grandmother, 360 00:17:59,482 --> 00:18:00,979 "Can you just take Caylynn for a little while 361 00:18:01,012 --> 00:18:03,098 until I get my head together?" 362 00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,882 Last thing I said to Caylynn is, "I promise you, 363 00:18:11,915 --> 00:18:14,581 I will be back for you." 364 00:18:14,609 --> 00:18:16,308 Just promising myself, go back for her, 365 00:18:16,319 --> 00:18:18,404 go back for her, go back for her. 366 00:18:20,388 --> 00:18:23,057 10 years later, my kid's still there. 367 00:18:42,625 --> 00:18:45,016 You know, sometimes, it scares me that, like, 368 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:48,045 I almost feel, like... 369 00:18:48,297 --> 00:18:50,298 in my mind... 370 00:18:50,323 --> 00:18:51,825 'Cause, like, I think, "Oh, my God. 371 00:18:51,850 --> 00:18:53,185 I've been out for almost two weeks, 372 00:18:53,210 --> 00:18:54,423 and I haven't gotten high." 373 00:18:54,448 --> 00:18:56,273 That's amazing for me. 374 00:18:56,321 --> 00:18:57,955 I've never done that. 375 00:18:58,028 --> 00:18:59,697 WOMAN: Are you proud of yourself? 376 00:18:59,722 --> 00:19:00,725 - I am. WOMAN: Good. 377 00:19:00,750 --> 00:19:04,158 - But then, like, I'm not capable of being strong, 378 00:19:04,183 --> 00:19:05,564 so like... 379 00:19:05,589 --> 00:19:07,883 WOMAN: Why would you say that? 380 00:19:07,908 --> 00:19:10,786 - Because it just doesn't happen like that for me. 381 00:19:10,789 --> 00:19:13,377 So it's like I'm waiting for this bombshell, 382 00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:15,447 and every day, it's like... 383 00:19:15,959 --> 00:19:18,197 I'm just like, oh, don't let it be today. 384 00:19:18,222 --> 00:19:20,741 Like, don't let today be that day. 385 00:19:21,372 --> 00:19:22,787 WOMAN: When you're constantly waiting 386 00:19:22,829 --> 00:19:24,617 for the other shoe to drop, 387 00:19:24,828 --> 00:19:27,547 it becomes a situation of self-sabotage. 388 00:19:31,183 --> 00:19:33,241 Every night, before you go to sleep, 389 00:19:33,266 --> 00:19:34,753 I want you to write 390 00:19:34,778 --> 00:19:37,616 three to five things that you're grateful for. 391 00:19:37,803 --> 00:19:39,303 Okay? 392 00:19:45,269 --> 00:19:47,021 [ dog barks ] 393 00:19:49,634 --> 00:19:50,857 RICK: What are you doing here? 394 00:19:50,882 --> 00:19:51,958 JACINTA: What are you doing here? 395 00:19:51,983 --> 00:19:52,984 This is my home. 396 00:19:53,009 --> 00:19:54,015 RICK: Yeah, right! 397 00:19:54,047 --> 00:19:55,426 [ both groan ] 398 00:19:55,562 --> 00:19:59,318 Where's this new tattoo you got there, sweetheart? 399 00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:02,495 Nice. 400 00:20:03,289 --> 00:20:06,250 - Does it hurt? - Yeah [ laughs ] 401 00:20:06,275 --> 00:20:08,417 RICK: You know what her best tattoo is? 402 00:20:08,432 --> 00:20:10,268 On her wrist, "Daddy's Girl." 403 00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:11,823 BILLIE: Is it? - I've got to get it darkened. 404 00:20:11,852 --> 00:20:13,603 Yeah, read it. 405 00:20:14,604 --> 00:20:17,090 [ baby coos ] 406 00:20:17,107 --> 00:20:18,521 [ chuckles ] Hi, little guy. 407 00:20:18,567 --> 00:20:20,903 What's up, buddy? 408 00:20:23,903 --> 00:20:25,177 Puke all over me. 409 00:20:25,410 --> 00:20:28,385 - Your brother was holding him up like this. 410 00:20:28,410 --> 00:20:30,794 Puked all down him and didn't even phase him. 411 00:20:30,829 --> 00:20:32,331 He's like, "Hey, will you grab me something?" 412 00:20:32,372 --> 00:20:34,498 And I'm, like, about to puke myself. 413 00:20:34,876 --> 00:20:37,153 - Listen, if I wanted any shit from you, 414 00:20:37,169 --> 00:20:38,587 I'd ask for it. 415 00:20:38,612 --> 00:20:40,146 Yeah! 416 00:20:40,172 --> 00:20:42,381 [ dogs bark ] 417 00:20:43,257 --> 00:20:46,186 SHAUN: Me and my sister, we kind of had it the same. 418 00:20:47,387 --> 00:20:48,975 When I was 18, 419 00:20:49,014 --> 00:20:51,997 I went to prison myself for drinking and driving. 420 00:20:53,101 --> 00:20:55,154 You know, she grew up here. 421 00:20:55,179 --> 00:20:56,972 She was lucky to have 422 00:20:56,997 --> 00:20:59,048 her biological father 423 00:20:59,718 --> 00:21:02,866 be able to take care of her... 424 00:21:04,137 --> 00:21:08,140 ...'cause my mom's always been off and running. 425 00:21:12,829 --> 00:21:16,250 - Boy, I haven't been through these drawers in forever. 426 00:21:17,969 --> 00:21:20,638 That's Jacinta when she was a baby. 427 00:21:21,946 --> 00:21:24,758 EARNSHAW: When did you and Rosemary split up? 428 00:21:24,783 --> 00:21:26,451 [ sighing ] Oh... 429 00:21:26,476 --> 00:21:27,877 Actually, we split up 430 00:21:27,902 --> 00:21:30,679 before Jacinta was born. 431 00:21:31,072 --> 00:21:33,541 And then we tried to get back together, 432 00:21:33,566 --> 00:21:35,267 and it didn't work out so well 433 00:21:36,038 --> 00:21:37,253 because she was going through 434 00:21:37,278 --> 00:21:39,721 whatever she was going through at that time. 435 00:21:39,828 --> 00:21:41,330 I used to go get Jacinta 436 00:21:41,343 --> 00:21:43,360 and then, of course, bring her back. 437 00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,692 I wish I could really remember the date 438 00:21:48,717 --> 00:21:51,421 and how old she was when I got custody of her. 439 00:21:54,731 --> 00:21:56,187 Hmm. 440 00:21:58,625 --> 00:22:01,127 [ music plays indistinctly ] 441 00:22:04,589 --> 00:22:06,132 JACINTA: I love this song. 442 00:22:10,887 --> 00:22:13,942 This used to be the biggest crack house in town. 443 00:22:14,819 --> 00:22:16,237 Freddy used to live here. 444 00:22:16,262 --> 00:22:17,466 He was, like, my best friend, 445 00:22:17,491 --> 00:22:20,443 but he was, like, the biggest drug dealer around here. 446 00:22:20,468 --> 00:22:21,928 Okay, this guy, Chuck, right here, 447 00:22:21,953 --> 00:22:24,539 the guy with the black shirt on... 448 00:22:24,564 --> 00:22:27,232 he runs for mayor every year. 449 00:22:27,257 --> 00:22:29,318 He thinks all the prostitutes are going to, like... 450 00:22:30,099 --> 00:22:32,936 get together and make him rich. 451 00:22:34,645 --> 00:22:35,897 Keith! 452 00:22:36,565 --> 00:22:38,163 You trying to get in trouble? 453 00:22:38,337 --> 00:22:39,362 Why? 454 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:40,953 How you doing? When did you get out? 455 00:22:41,044 --> 00:22:42,442 I've been out for a while. 456 00:22:42,528 --> 00:22:44,548 Awesome. You look real nice, look at you. 457 00:22:44,702 --> 00:22:45,714 Thank you. 458 00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:46,881 Congratulations. 459 00:22:46,983 --> 00:22:48,304 Thank you. That's awesome. 460 00:22:49,509 --> 00:22:52,310 [ horn honks ] 461 00:22:59,044 --> 00:23:00,644 So where did you go? 462 00:23:02,508 --> 00:23:05,261 You went down to the hood, drove around. You talked to nobody? 463 00:23:07,428 --> 00:23:09,932 - Honestly... 464 00:23:09,972 --> 00:23:11,923 she don't need to see those people. 465 00:23:11,948 --> 00:23:13,699 She doesn't. 466 00:23:13,724 --> 00:23:15,701 You know, she's got so many friends that 467 00:23:16,795 --> 00:23:18,747 they all did wrong, 468 00:23:18,772 --> 00:23:20,956 and it seems like... bam. 469 00:23:23,627 --> 00:23:26,205 I don't know. 470 00:23:26,213 --> 00:23:28,632 I-I'm just glad nothing happened. 471 00:23:28,664 --> 00:23:30,113 I really am. 472 00:23:30,367 --> 00:23:33,997 [ somber music plays ] 473 00:23:34,042 --> 00:23:37,557 ♪♪ 474 00:23:37,582 --> 00:23:39,451 ♪♪ 475 00:23:39,476 --> 00:23:41,728 JACINTA: I have dreams. 476 00:23:41,753 --> 00:23:43,728 The dreams are weird. 477 00:23:43,772 --> 00:23:46,935 Like Caylynn behind a door... 478 00:23:49,611 --> 00:23:51,906 ...crying. 479 00:23:51,917 --> 00:23:55,073 I hear Cay, but I can't -- can't see anything around me. 480 00:23:56,535 --> 00:23:59,300 I try to get to her, and then I go to touch the door knob, 481 00:23:59,325 --> 00:24:00,983 and it's too hot. 482 00:24:01,008 --> 00:24:04,461 I can't get to the other side. 483 00:24:04,497 --> 00:24:06,285 And the nights that I don't have dreams. 484 00:24:06,410 --> 00:24:09,256 I wake up every hour. 485 00:24:09,278 --> 00:24:12,364 And then once I wake up, I can't sleep. 486 00:24:30,053 --> 00:24:31,053 Hi Mommy. 487 00:24:31,570 --> 00:24:33,655 JACINTA: Hi. 488 00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:35,735 CAYLYNN: [ screams ] 489 00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:37,806 - What's the matter? 490 00:24:37,826 --> 00:24:39,727 - [ laughs ] I can't breathe. 491 00:24:39,762 --> 00:24:41,336 - I thought you were stronger than me. 492 00:24:41,371 --> 00:24:43,627 - [ laughs ] Well, not when I'm pinned down. 493 00:24:43,651 --> 00:24:45,611 - Well, that was the point. 494 00:24:45,636 --> 00:24:47,556 - [ screams ] Stop, Mom! 495 00:24:47,586 --> 00:24:49,254 [ both laugh ] 496 00:24:49,279 --> 00:24:51,806 - Are you still stronger than me? 497 00:24:51,831 --> 00:24:54,360 Are you still stronger than me? - No. 498 00:24:54,397 --> 00:24:56,900 - What? - You're way stronger than I am. 499 00:24:56,939 --> 00:24:59,541 - Say it again? - You're way stronger than I am. 500 00:24:59,556 --> 00:25:00,876 - Are you gonna kiss me? - Yes! 501 00:25:00,901 --> 00:25:03,070 - Promise? - I promise. 502 00:25:03,101 --> 00:25:04,310 - Alright. 503 00:25:04,353 --> 00:25:06,775 Now kiss me. 504 00:25:08,085 --> 00:25:10,837 Go like this. Go like this. 505 00:25:10,862 --> 00:25:12,808 There you -- No. 506 00:25:12,819 --> 00:25:14,922 Tighten up. There you go. 507 00:25:14,930 --> 00:25:16,204 Bam. - Bam. 508 00:25:16,225 --> 00:25:17,399 - That's how you do it. Straight on. 509 00:25:17,424 --> 00:25:18,430 Bam. 510 00:25:18,434 --> 00:25:20,508 - Bam. 511 00:25:20,533 --> 00:25:23,274 - No, like this. 512 00:25:23,288 --> 00:25:24,498 There you go. 513 00:25:24,523 --> 00:25:26,317 Bam. 514 00:25:28,365 --> 00:25:29,379 Do you like these ones? 515 00:25:29,404 --> 00:25:31,353 - I like them better. 516 00:25:32,005 --> 00:25:34,301 - Get them both. 517 00:25:34,326 --> 00:25:35,855 Get them both. 518 00:25:35,909 --> 00:25:38,372 WANDA: Why are getting that kind of stuff during summer? 519 00:25:38,385 --> 00:25:39,954 You're gonna be hot. 520 00:25:39,971 --> 00:25:41,782 You're not gonna wear that. 521 00:25:42,321 --> 00:25:44,699 - Mommy picked it out. - She likes them. 522 00:25:44,724 --> 00:25:46,434 [ chuckles ] 523 00:25:46,476 --> 00:25:48,355 - You can wear them whenever, I guess, 524 00:25:48,361 --> 00:25:50,780 but you're gonna need shorts. 525 00:25:55,204 --> 00:25:59,834 WANDA: John and I took Caylynn when she was 3 years old. 526 00:25:59,917 --> 00:26:02,515 They won't see each other for years at a time, 527 00:26:02,540 --> 00:26:04,291 and the minute they're together, 528 00:26:04,329 --> 00:26:08,304 it's like they never left each other, ever. 529 00:26:08,333 --> 00:26:11,129 Caylynn's father is my son, Eric. 530 00:26:11,173 --> 00:26:13,676 He's currently incarcerated. 531 00:26:13,719 --> 00:26:15,549 For her, sometimes with her father, 532 00:26:15,574 --> 00:26:19,204 it was awkward here and there after not being around him. 533 00:26:19,219 --> 00:26:21,306 Not with her mother. It's never awkward. 534 00:26:21,329 --> 00:26:24,319 It's just an automatic connection 535 00:26:24,344 --> 00:26:26,513 the minute they see each other. 536 00:26:29,830 --> 00:26:34,236 When Jacinta delivered Caylynn... 537 00:26:34,712 --> 00:26:37,264 right after she had her, 538 00:26:37,300 --> 00:26:40,280 I was thinking, "Oh, this is gonna be an amazing mother." 539 00:26:41,632 --> 00:26:44,104 'Cause she looked at me, and she said, 540 00:26:44,159 --> 00:26:48,353 "How do you love somebody so much that you've never met?" 541 00:26:51,010 --> 00:26:54,336 Just to have that much love for your child... 542 00:26:55,157 --> 00:26:57,015 How do you let that go? 543 00:27:04,704 --> 00:27:07,037 I think I'm leaving the sober house. 544 00:27:07,754 --> 00:27:09,572 CAYLYNN: Why? 545 00:27:09,597 --> 00:27:11,728 JACINTA: Because I want to take a job, Cay. 546 00:27:13,114 --> 00:27:16,492 - I don't want you to. JACINTA: Why? 547 00:27:17,944 --> 00:27:21,900 - 'Cause I think that that's just... 548 00:27:21,925 --> 00:27:24,368 a better place. 549 00:27:24,840 --> 00:27:26,549 They are really trying to help you there, 550 00:27:26,574 --> 00:27:28,041 and you said it yourself, 551 00:27:28,105 --> 00:27:31,515 that that was your choice and nobody else's, 552 00:27:31,525 --> 00:27:34,363 but that was a good choice, 553 00:27:34,401 --> 00:27:37,237 and I don't know why you're gonna quit. 554 00:27:38,048 --> 00:27:41,718 I was hoping you'd stay there for a while. 555 00:27:49,309 --> 00:27:51,816 You have anything to say? 556 00:27:51,841 --> 00:27:54,425 JACINTA: I understand what you're saying, and... 557 00:27:56,149 --> 00:27:58,766 I don't mind staying at the sober house. 558 00:27:58,839 --> 00:28:01,133 I just -- I -- 559 00:28:01,154 --> 00:28:04,886 Getting a job and moving forward... 560 00:28:05,659 --> 00:28:08,542 it's something that I feel I need to do. 561 00:28:08,604 --> 00:28:11,628 - Well, what if it doesn't work? 562 00:28:11,768 --> 00:28:14,820 What if the sober house is the only thing 563 00:28:14,849 --> 00:28:16,836 that's keeping you 564 00:28:16,862 --> 00:28:19,283 going the way you're supposed to? 565 00:28:26,596 --> 00:28:29,724 I don't know. You can do whatever you want. 566 00:28:36,857 --> 00:28:38,888 [ speaks indistinctly ] 567 00:28:38,913 --> 00:28:41,521 - It's getting hot. 568 00:28:41,546 --> 00:28:43,341 I don't know why this thing is not working. 569 00:28:43,363 --> 00:28:45,493 It's pissing me off, though. 570 00:28:48,875 --> 00:28:50,357 - Mommy... 571 00:28:50,370 --> 00:28:51,859 - What? 572 00:28:51,897 --> 00:28:53,525 - It's okay. 573 00:28:53,561 --> 00:28:56,554 Let's just move on with our lives. 574 00:28:56,568 --> 00:28:58,864 - I need my purse. 575 00:28:58,879 --> 00:29:02,372 - ♪ My child, it's gonna be alright ♪ 576 00:29:02,397 --> 00:29:04,190 - Can you go see if I have a lighter in my purse? 577 00:29:04,215 --> 00:29:05,880 - No. - Please? 578 00:29:05,927 --> 00:29:07,553 - No. - [ chuckles ] 579 00:29:07,594 --> 00:29:09,012 Can you go get me my purse? 580 00:29:09,039 --> 00:29:10,760 - Over my dead body. 581 00:29:10,785 --> 00:29:12,646 - Please? - No. 582 00:29:13,543 --> 00:29:15,088 - Alright. I got to get my purse. 583 00:29:15,129 --> 00:29:17,422 - No. - Yeah. 584 00:29:17,447 --> 00:29:18,963 - Over my dead body. 585 00:29:19,007 --> 00:29:21,053 - I'm going to get my purse. - No, you're not. 586 00:29:21,068 --> 00:29:22,777 - Yeah, I am. - Do you love me? 587 00:29:22,802 --> 00:29:24,515 - Yes, but I'm still going to get my purse. 588 00:29:24,540 --> 00:29:26,072 - Why? 589 00:29:26,097 --> 00:29:28,265 - 'Cause I need a lighter. 590 00:29:28,290 --> 00:29:30,285 - Why? - 'Cause. 591 00:29:30,327 --> 00:29:32,704 - 'Cause why? 592 00:29:46,186 --> 00:29:48,271 - You know, there's a... 593 00:29:48,322 --> 00:29:50,113 house... 594 00:29:50,138 --> 00:29:52,973 down on my road, 595 00:29:53,752 --> 00:29:57,167 and it's a nice house, 596 00:29:58,647 --> 00:30:02,876 and it's, like, empty. 597 00:30:03,562 --> 00:30:05,356 You could maybe get it 598 00:30:05,722 --> 00:30:08,762 if you save enough money. 599 00:30:09,393 --> 00:30:12,396 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 600 00:30:15,113 --> 00:30:18,534 So that way, whenever I wanted to see you, 601 00:30:18,589 --> 00:30:22,656 just walk down. - [ laughs ] 602 00:30:22,682 --> 00:30:25,352 And we can have sleep-overs 603 00:30:25,377 --> 00:30:27,754 all the time. 604 00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:31,665 That would be fun. 605 00:30:31,699 --> 00:30:33,102 [ chuckles ] 606 00:30:37,623 --> 00:30:39,241 - I had good day. 607 00:30:39,266 --> 00:30:41,018 - Me too. 608 00:30:41,023 --> 00:30:42,455 WANDA: Remember that? 609 00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:44,838 This is supposed to be put away with my stuff. 610 00:30:45,184 --> 00:30:46,790 - [ chuckles ] 611 00:30:46,815 --> 00:30:48,024 - Do you? - What's that? 612 00:30:48,056 --> 00:30:49,456 - Yeah. - What is it? 613 00:30:49,474 --> 00:30:51,095 - Your mother got me that. 614 00:30:51,241 --> 00:30:53,385 - Really? - Yeah. 615 00:30:53,410 --> 00:30:55,854 I think it was a Mother's Day or something years ago. 616 00:30:57,329 --> 00:30:59,643 It's for knickknacks. 617 00:30:59,668 --> 00:31:01,646 - I love you. - I love you, too. 618 00:31:02,070 --> 00:31:03,625 Keep up the good work. 619 00:31:03,803 --> 00:31:04,929 - Thank you. 620 00:31:05,199 --> 00:31:06,909 - Please. 621 00:31:25,878 --> 00:31:27,671 - Love you. 622 00:31:27,696 --> 00:31:31,385 WANDA: I love you, too. 623 00:31:31,765 --> 00:31:34,685 - Don't cry, baby. 624 00:31:34,701 --> 00:31:37,287 CAYLYNN: [ crying ] 625 00:31:50,244 --> 00:31:52,830 - I'm gonna see you Friday. 626 00:32:00,661 --> 00:32:03,706 - Probably we'll see you Friday. 627 00:32:03,731 --> 00:32:06,984 Thank you for coming up. JACINTA: Bye. 628 00:32:09,052 --> 00:32:14,351 [ sentimental music plays ] 629 00:32:14,356 --> 00:32:21,759 ♪♪ 630 00:32:21,784 --> 00:32:28,123 ♪♪ 631 00:32:28,148 --> 00:32:34,779 ♪♪ 632 00:32:34,804 --> 00:32:40,821 ♪♪ 633 00:32:43,311 --> 00:32:45,688 What are you doing? 634 00:32:48,949 --> 00:32:52,614 Um, nothing. 635 00:32:52,639 --> 00:32:54,258 [ chuckles ] 636 00:32:54,308 --> 00:32:57,445 Nothing. Um... 637 00:32:58,577 --> 00:33:01,584 I am on my way to Gorham, 638 00:33:01,621 --> 00:33:05,447 but I really, really want to get high right now. 639 00:33:10,130 --> 00:33:12,007 So... 640 00:33:12,032 --> 00:33:15,493 [ chuckles ] 641 00:33:23,518 --> 00:33:27,397 Like, five minutes. 642 00:33:28,039 --> 00:33:29,664 Alright. 643 00:33:29,927 --> 00:33:31,887 Alright. Bye. 644 00:33:40,577 --> 00:33:42,871 EARNSHAW: What are you gonna do? 645 00:33:42,913 --> 00:33:45,708 - I'm gonna get high. 646 00:33:47,831 --> 00:33:52,191 You can't have that camera on. 647 00:33:52,214 --> 00:33:54,963 You should probably shut that off now. 648 00:33:55,008 --> 00:33:57,385 [ car door shuts ] 649 00:34:16,113 --> 00:34:18,908 Thanks for not leaving me. 650 00:34:21,910 --> 00:34:24,287 I can't... 651 00:34:25,939 --> 00:34:28,235 can't put myself through this again. 652 00:34:28,275 --> 00:34:30,821 I cannot believe I fuckin' 653 00:34:30,836 --> 00:34:33,324 really went through with it. 654 00:34:34,447 --> 00:34:35,649 Oh, my God. 655 00:34:35,674 --> 00:34:37,855 [ voice breaking ] Like, I... 656 00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:40,831 literally was, like, 657 00:34:40,856 --> 00:34:43,150 talking myself out 658 00:34:43,175 --> 00:34:45,664 of not talking myself out of it. 659 00:34:45,684 --> 00:34:48,179 Like... 660 00:34:48,812 --> 00:34:50,930 I don't get it. 661 00:34:54,344 --> 00:34:57,347 I'm never gonna be a mom. 662 00:34:58,700 --> 00:35:03,451 [ somber music plays ] 663 00:35:03,476 --> 00:35:09,443 ♪♪ 664 00:35:09,451 --> 00:35:16,249 ♪♪ 665 00:35:16,256 --> 00:35:23,263 ♪♪ 666 00:35:23,288 --> 00:35:24,998 I went to see my daughter, 667 00:35:25,023 --> 00:35:29,817 and I just had so many emotions going through me. 668 00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:32,713 It's almost like 669 00:35:32,729 --> 00:35:35,504 I was holding off to that point. 670 00:35:36,318 --> 00:35:37,736 Alright. Look, I did it. 671 00:35:37,778 --> 00:35:39,543 Like, I made it to see her. 672 00:35:40,571 --> 00:35:42,473 I'm not a bad person, 673 00:35:44,434 --> 00:35:46,989 and I hear people talk about people -- 674 00:35:46,995 --> 00:35:48,684 "Oh, this person got out. 675 00:35:48,705 --> 00:35:50,490 She didn't even go see her kid. 676 00:35:50,499 --> 00:35:52,165 She got high." 677 00:35:53,387 --> 00:35:56,489 It's almost worse to go see them 678 00:35:56,537 --> 00:35:59,349 and then get high and not go back 679 00:36:00,035 --> 00:36:02,830 than it is to just not go at all. 680 00:36:04,809 --> 00:36:07,597 Take it from me -- I used to get so mad at my mom. 681 00:36:08,303 --> 00:36:10,222 Why'd you even come? 682 00:36:10,247 --> 00:36:12,499 Why'd you even come? 683 00:36:20,987 --> 00:36:23,114 WOMAN: What do you got to say for yourself? 684 00:36:29,077 --> 00:36:30,981 You've got a house full of women 685 00:36:31,006 --> 00:36:33,414 that were scared to death for you last night. 686 00:36:35,419 --> 00:36:36,700 You can't come back to the house. 687 00:36:36,712 --> 00:36:38,747 You know that, right? 688 00:36:38,772 --> 00:36:41,506 Did you think I was gonna let you back in? 689 00:36:41,531 --> 00:36:43,299 - I didn't... 690 00:36:44,058 --> 00:36:45,389 I didn't know. 691 00:36:45,414 --> 00:36:48,828 WOMAN: You didn't know. Okay. Alright. 692 00:36:48,893 --> 00:36:51,310 So we know that's not gonna happen today. 693 00:37:00,696 --> 00:37:03,282 [ dog barks ] 694 00:37:11,279 --> 00:37:15,158 JACINTA: My boyfriend wants me to move in with him. 695 00:37:17,267 --> 00:37:20,979 Lucky's place is a safe option because he don't use drugs. 696 00:37:23,467 --> 00:37:25,020 - What happened? 697 00:37:25,045 --> 00:37:26,618 - What do you mean what happened? 698 00:37:26,636 --> 00:37:29,793 - To your pants? You bought them like that? 699 00:37:30,051 --> 00:37:33,810 We met a month or two before she went to jail, 700 00:37:33,835 --> 00:37:37,007 and we got along right from the start, 701 00:37:37,022 --> 00:37:39,879 but she still had drug issues. 702 00:37:40,286 --> 00:37:42,927 I would be like, "I'm done," 703 00:37:44,355 --> 00:37:47,075 but I wouldn't follow through with 704 00:37:47,576 --> 00:37:50,581 the, "I'm done." 705 00:37:50,777 --> 00:37:53,697 She really is a great person 706 00:37:53,705 --> 00:37:55,317 with a bad habit. 707 00:37:56,272 --> 00:37:58,983 Everybody, "Listen, man. 708 00:37:59,082 --> 00:38:00,676 She's a Geisinger. 709 00:38:00,712 --> 00:38:03,473 Get the fuck out of there." 710 00:38:03,988 --> 00:38:06,864 Once you get involved with that family, 711 00:38:06,889 --> 00:38:09,950 their reputation is that of, 712 00:38:10,763 --> 00:38:13,153 you're gonna get taken. 713 00:38:13,178 --> 00:38:16,379 The odds are, you're probably gonna be getting arrested, 714 00:38:16,404 --> 00:38:18,739 going to jail, you know? 715 00:38:18,772 --> 00:38:21,566 And they're looking at you going, "What?" 716 00:38:25,696 --> 00:38:28,198 JACINTA: My mother's family, 717 00:38:28,240 --> 00:38:29,885 the Geisingers, 718 00:38:29,908 --> 00:38:31,956 pretty much were just known for... 719 00:38:31,981 --> 00:38:34,619 chaos and crime. 720 00:38:36,814 --> 00:38:37,984 Drug dealers know us. 721 00:38:38,009 --> 00:38:39,299 Cops know us. 722 00:38:39,857 --> 00:38:42,235 Everybody in Portland knows us. 723 00:38:51,138 --> 00:38:53,849 MAN: Don't blame him. MAN 724 00:38:53,874 --> 00:38:55,042 I'm blaming you. 725 00:38:55,067 --> 00:38:57,315 MAN: Blame him. 726 00:38:57,340 --> 00:38:59,026 TODD: Jacinta's my sister, 727 00:38:59,051 --> 00:39:02,323 and Rosemary is my mother. 728 00:39:02,348 --> 00:39:04,095 EARNSHAW: What are your charges usually? 729 00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:06,127 Drugs, guns, and burglary. 730 00:39:07,638 --> 00:39:10,879 I got taken away from my mom when I was 11, 731 00:39:10,907 --> 00:39:13,511 but I was always running away from group homes or 732 00:39:13,536 --> 00:39:15,378 escaping from the youth center. 733 00:39:16,016 --> 00:39:18,015 When I was on the run, my mom was the one 734 00:39:18,037 --> 00:39:19,409 that would always come and get me, 735 00:39:19,434 --> 00:39:22,085 and I would stay there with her. 736 00:39:22,107 --> 00:39:25,050 My Nana gave my mom this big floor screen TV, 737 00:39:25,075 --> 00:39:27,504 and my mom had the guts taken out -- 738 00:39:27,547 --> 00:39:30,152 that way, when you pushed the TV against the wall, 739 00:39:30,177 --> 00:39:32,746 it looks like a regular TV 'cause you can't see inside. 740 00:39:32,771 --> 00:39:34,783 So whenever the cops or probation would come, 741 00:39:34,808 --> 00:39:36,863 I'd get inside the TV, 742 00:39:36,888 --> 00:39:38,230 and they would push it against the wall, 743 00:39:38,251 --> 00:39:39,855 and I would just sit in there and watch, like, 744 00:39:39,880 --> 00:39:42,530 the youth center staff or her probation officer 745 00:39:42,555 --> 00:39:44,269 talk to her, look, search the house for me, 746 00:39:44,294 --> 00:39:46,218 and the whole time I'm sitting there, 747 00:39:46,243 --> 00:39:47,429 watching them through the TV. 748 00:39:47,468 --> 00:39:49,306 It's pretty funny. 749 00:39:50,143 --> 00:39:53,528 That's my niece, Caylynn, my sister's daughter, 750 00:39:53,553 --> 00:39:55,176 and my sister. 751 00:39:56,533 --> 00:39:59,543 Jacinta lived mostly with her father. 752 00:39:59,568 --> 00:40:01,599 I don't know how old she was when she actually really started 753 00:40:01,624 --> 00:40:04,671 to go to live with my mom. 754 00:40:04,836 --> 00:40:06,879 But she was just so... 755 00:40:06,922 --> 00:40:09,046 innocent. 756 00:40:09,849 --> 00:40:13,083 My mom started hanging out with the bad guys, 757 00:40:13,108 --> 00:40:15,939 who sold drugs and did drugs. 758 00:40:17,165 --> 00:40:20,526 That's when Jacinta started to get involved 759 00:40:20,543 --> 00:40:23,715 in the things that she was doing and started doing drugs and 760 00:40:23,755 --> 00:40:25,884 doing all of the stuff that 761 00:40:25,922 --> 00:40:28,080 me and my mom was doing. 762 00:40:29,870 --> 00:40:32,512 I was 16 when I first started smoking crack with my mother. 763 00:40:34,159 --> 00:40:35,705 Jacinta... 764 00:40:35,725 --> 00:40:37,938 she looked up to me. 765 00:40:37,963 --> 00:40:40,549 She seen me doing it. 766 00:40:42,636 --> 00:40:45,330 When Jacinta came into the youth center she was really young. 767 00:40:47,362 --> 00:40:49,829 You were there then, when she came in. 768 00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:50,842 Yeah. 769 00:40:51,049 --> 00:40:52,469 Can you describe that day? 770 00:40:52,494 --> 00:40:54,595 [ scoffs ] No. 771 00:41:00,634 --> 00:41:01,764 Uh, it sucked. 772 00:41:01,789 --> 00:41:03,708 Um... 773 00:41:05,564 --> 00:41:07,304 I think it was -- 774 00:41:07,315 --> 00:41:09,690 One of the hardest things I did was seeing her in there... 775 00:41:10,462 --> 00:41:13,945 and knowing the things that went on there with people. 776 00:41:18,638 --> 00:41:22,309 And that's when I realized that I really fucked her life up. 777 00:41:33,647 --> 00:41:36,889 All's Jacinta wanted, always, was my mother, 778 00:41:37,159 --> 00:41:40,030 and all Caylynn wants is Jacinta. 779 00:41:40,421 --> 00:41:42,331 I mean, what kid don't want their parent? 780 00:41:59,493 --> 00:42:01,851 - My family's fucked. They're twisted, 781 00:42:01,870 --> 00:42:04,120 But hers is, like, fucking pretzel twisted. 782 00:42:05,275 --> 00:42:06,985 You don't even know. 783 00:42:07,152 --> 00:42:08,601 How long have you known Jacinta for? 784 00:42:08,820 --> 00:42:10,306 Since she was a baby. 785 00:42:12,899 --> 00:42:14,570 If her mother's out, 786 00:42:15,016 --> 00:42:17,249 Jacinta will do anything in the world for her mother. 787 00:42:17,274 --> 00:42:19,624 Anything in the world. 788 00:42:20,013 --> 00:42:22,599 Why is that, Jacinta? 789 00:42:31,802 --> 00:42:33,929 What are you thinking? 790 00:42:35,765 --> 00:42:37,678 You don't? Or you do? 791 00:42:37,703 --> 00:42:39,621 You don't, but you do. 792 00:42:41,201 --> 00:42:43,369 - I do, but I don't. 793 00:42:55,900 --> 00:42:59,495 JACINTA: I just don't know how to explain it... 794 00:42:59,928 --> 00:43:02,128 honestly. 795 00:43:02,139 --> 00:43:04,517 It just make things okay. 796 00:43:08,122 --> 00:43:10,208 It's like that... 797 00:43:10,233 --> 00:43:14,054 best friend that never talks back, you know? 798 00:43:30,107 --> 00:43:32,667 PHIL: Why are you shaking honey? 799 00:43:33,581 --> 00:43:35,732 Look at me. 800 00:43:35,757 --> 00:43:38,030 Come here, baby. 801 00:43:38,869 --> 00:43:41,246 Look at me. 802 00:43:43,412 --> 00:43:45,751 You okay? 803 00:43:45,807 --> 00:43:49,060 What am I gonna do with you? 804 00:43:52,564 --> 00:43:55,483 [ sentimental music plays ] 805 00:43:55,525 --> 00:43:59,342 ♪♪ 806 00:43:59,363 --> 00:44:03,155 JACINTA: My mother -- she always dressed so fancy, 807 00:44:03,180 --> 00:44:04,724 and her hair was always done, 808 00:44:04,743 --> 00:44:07,241 and I love the way she spoke. 809 00:44:08,744 --> 00:44:10,499 I just picked up on everything, 810 00:44:11,914 --> 00:44:13,210 every mistake she made, 811 00:44:13,254 --> 00:44:15,405 and I loved it. 812 00:44:16,195 --> 00:44:19,326 I loved the way she drove a car. 813 00:44:19,420 --> 00:44:21,311 I would sit in the back seat, 814 00:44:21,343 --> 00:44:24,617 and you could see both of us in the rear-view mirror. 815 00:44:24,953 --> 00:44:26,578 I would forget that my reflection 816 00:44:26,598 --> 00:44:28,242 was there, as well, 817 00:44:28,249 --> 00:44:31,713 and I would stare right at her. 818 00:44:31,970 --> 00:44:34,102 When I would look at myself, 819 00:44:34,147 --> 00:44:35,875 just in the mirror by myself, 820 00:44:35,882 --> 00:44:38,262 I would literally see her. 821 00:44:41,473 --> 00:44:43,931 I wanted to be like her, 822 00:44:45,033 --> 00:44:47,250 not that I wanted to pick up her mistakes, 823 00:44:47,275 --> 00:44:49,602 but, if that's what it took, 824 00:44:49,627 --> 00:44:51,662 I was going to do it. 825 00:44:57,236 --> 00:45:00,993 [ indistinct chanting ] 826 00:45:01,032 --> 00:45:04,077 [ music plays indistinctly ] 827 00:45:05,846 --> 00:45:08,223 JOHN: Alright, Caylynn. 828 00:45:21,778 --> 00:45:23,522 CAYLYNN: When I go to cheer practice, 829 00:45:23,530 --> 00:45:26,222 my personal issues just kind of go away. 830 00:45:27,576 --> 00:45:29,892 It's not a sport for me. 831 00:45:29,911 --> 00:45:31,786 It's more of a getaway. 832 00:45:35,102 --> 00:45:36,812 WANDA: Jacinta was a cheerleader. 833 00:45:36,837 --> 00:45:38,863 I think a lot of things Jacinta told Caylynn 834 00:45:38,879 --> 00:45:40,738 that she's like to do 835 00:45:40,763 --> 00:45:45,508 have now become things that Caylynn is obsessed with. 836 00:45:45,552 --> 00:45:47,929 [ cheers and applause ] 837 00:45:57,590 --> 00:45:58,859 JOHN: Caylynn was telling me, 838 00:45:58,899 --> 00:46:00,648 "I haven't heard from my mother." 839 00:46:01,725 --> 00:46:04,632 We've actually, you know, blamed it on the drugs, 840 00:46:04,654 --> 00:46:06,656 and we just say that's what -- 841 00:46:06,681 --> 00:46:08,266 why she does the things she does. 842 00:46:08,291 --> 00:46:09,638 - We always have told her, 843 00:46:09,659 --> 00:46:10,891 "She loves you more than anything. 844 00:46:10,916 --> 00:46:12,952 She just doesn't even know how to love herself." 845 00:46:19,043 --> 00:46:20,901 CAYLYNN: I really just want my mom. 846 00:46:21,923 --> 00:46:23,738 Why isn't she staying around? 847 00:46:29,399 --> 00:46:31,304 I'm feeling like... 848 00:46:31,349 --> 00:46:33,492 it was my fault. 849 00:46:33,725 --> 00:46:35,603 Maybe if I had been a different person 850 00:46:35,629 --> 00:46:37,884 she would've stuck around a little longer. 851 00:46:50,052 --> 00:46:52,846 [ TV plays indistinctly ] 852 00:46:56,161 --> 00:46:57,780 BILLIE: I don't know how Jacinta really feels, 853 00:46:57,791 --> 00:47:00,232 but I know doing drugs, she's blocking it all out. 854 00:47:01,146 --> 00:47:02,799 I know that's a fact. 855 00:47:02,824 --> 00:47:04,880 From one addict to another, that's a fact. 856 00:47:04,905 --> 00:47:06,243 It'll block everything out. 857 00:47:06,272 --> 00:47:08,115 - Oh, shit. 858 00:47:09,219 --> 00:47:11,364 BILLIE: Me and Jacinta went to Lewiston one day. 859 00:47:11,389 --> 00:47:13,387 She was using, and then I asked her, 860 00:47:13,417 --> 00:47:15,422 "Hey, can I get some of that from you? Fuck it." 861 00:47:15,851 --> 00:47:19,185 I gave her $20 and got a shot off of her, 862 00:47:19,999 --> 00:47:21,046 and ever since then, 863 00:47:21,071 --> 00:47:22,856 I've started to use with Jacinta. 864 00:47:23,442 --> 00:47:25,983 - I got it stuck. [ both laugh ] 865 00:47:26,008 --> 00:47:27,526 BILLIE: Her daughter called Shaun last night. 866 00:47:28,297 --> 00:47:29,737 Her daughter is hurt, 867 00:47:31,569 --> 00:47:33,244 and I've been in that situation, too. 868 00:47:34,164 --> 00:47:36,644 I've chosen drugs over both my kids. 869 00:47:37,646 --> 00:47:39,902 I can't say anything different. 870 00:48:01,924 --> 00:48:03,717 Come on, Jacinta. 871 00:48:07,110 --> 00:48:08,528 [ cellphone rings ] 872 00:48:08,570 --> 00:48:09,661 Oh, that's her. 873 00:48:09,681 --> 00:48:12,061 Hey, I'm in front of Old Navy. 874 00:48:15,312 --> 00:48:17,022 Do you see me? 875 00:48:25,572 --> 00:48:26,852 Did you run out? 876 00:48:26,881 --> 00:48:27,881 No. 877 00:48:31,367 --> 00:48:32,367 Never run. 878 00:48:33,119 --> 00:48:34,119 Never run. 879 00:48:38,892 --> 00:48:40,801 - Not bad. 880 00:48:41,284 --> 00:48:43,523 What do you think? 881 00:48:43,715 --> 00:48:46,301 - Fucking right. 882 00:48:50,404 --> 00:48:51,822 EARNSHAW: How did you learn to shoplift? 883 00:48:51,863 --> 00:48:53,459 JACINTA: Watching my mom. 884 00:48:53,484 --> 00:48:56,662 I've been watching her since I was in the fucking carriage. 885 00:48:56,687 --> 00:48:58,573 She used to use my fucking stroller. 886 00:48:58,870 --> 00:49:00,764 [ both laugh ] 887 00:49:00,789 --> 00:49:02,746 I'm my mom's ride or die. 888 00:49:02,916 --> 00:49:05,241 I might've been, like, 14 years old. 889 00:49:05,249 --> 00:49:06,938 My mom got pulled over. 890 00:49:06,944 --> 00:49:08,949 She, like, gave me a look that like, 891 00:49:08,964 --> 00:49:10,383 I knew that something was wrong, 892 00:49:10,406 --> 00:49:12,160 like I needed to start looking for something. 893 00:49:12,187 --> 00:49:14,174 I grabbed those 2 ounces of coke, 894 00:49:14,488 --> 00:49:16,365 and I stuck them down my pants, 895 00:49:16,385 --> 00:49:18,137 and I got out of the car, and the cop goes, 896 00:49:18,162 --> 00:49:19,584 "I need you to stay in the vehicle." 897 00:49:19,626 --> 00:49:21,044 And I was like, "I have a kidney disease. 898 00:49:21,069 --> 00:49:22,796 I have to go to the bathroom," 899 00:49:22,833 --> 00:49:24,543 and I brought those into the bathroom 900 00:49:24,568 --> 00:49:25,858 on the main turnpike. 901 00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:27,092 My mom got arrested, 902 00:49:27,131 --> 00:49:28,904 and then she called from the jail, 903 00:49:28,924 --> 00:49:30,721 and I was like, "Mom, I hid that stuff." 904 00:49:30,758 --> 00:49:32,820 We went back and picked it up, like, four hours later. 905 00:49:32,845 --> 00:49:34,725 It was still there. 906 00:49:35,407 --> 00:49:37,112 Mm-hmm. 907 00:49:37,137 --> 00:49:39,408 BILLIE: That's a ride or die. There you go. 908 00:49:41,621 --> 00:49:43,370 I felt like I made my mom proud. 909 00:49:45,691 --> 00:49:47,279 - Yeah, I could see that. 910 00:49:47,294 --> 00:49:49,421 You probably did. 911 00:49:52,340 --> 00:49:54,717 [ women shouting ] 912 00:49:58,872 --> 00:50:00,332 ROSEMARY: Some of the things 913 00:50:00,357 --> 00:50:02,248 they couldn't prove me guilty of. 914 00:50:02,809 --> 00:50:05,627 Stealing clothes. Stealing food. 915 00:50:05,652 --> 00:50:07,311 They're saying that's me. 916 00:50:09,632 --> 00:50:12,524 And my lawyer says, what? 917 00:50:12,944 --> 00:50:14,470 EARNSHAW: Is that you? No. 918 00:50:14,515 --> 00:50:16,496 - [ chuckles ] 919 00:50:17,032 --> 00:50:19,448 Well, that's what a jury would say, too. 920 00:50:19,473 --> 00:50:21,558 EARNSHAW: Well, what's the truth? 921 00:50:21,583 --> 00:50:23,327 Is that you? No. 922 00:50:23,899 --> 00:50:25,648 - Is it? You tell me. 923 00:50:26,512 --> 00:50:28,691 If you was the jury, what would you say? 924 00:50:31,566 --> 00:50:33,133 EARNSHAW: I mean, it's hard to tell. 925 00:50:33,158 --> 00:50:34,718 It looks... - There you go. 926 00:50:34,743 --> 00:50:37,059 You have to be 100% sure on a jury. 927 00:50:37,955 --> 00:50:40,587 [ chuckles ] 928 00:50:46,478 --> 00:50:49,003 My dad was here in prison before, 929 00:50:50,148 --> 00:50:54,026 and he's always been in and out 930 00:50:54,051 --> 00:50:57,720 of drinking and doing drugs. 931 00:50:59,006 --> 00:51:01,980 It's kind of hard to talk about, but I was, you know, molested 932 00:51:02,017 --> 00:51:05,023 and -- by my dad. 933 00:51:05,080 --> 00:51:06,623 I'm gonna get teary-eyed. 934 00:51:06,656 --> 00:51:08,585 EARNSHAW: That's okay. 935 00:51:08,628 --> 00:51:10,644 ROSEMARY: I can remember my sisters trying to, like, 936 00:51:10,666 --> 00:51:13,588 hide me in closets and stuff, trying to protect me. 937 00:51:13,610 --> 00:51:15,695 I can remember hearing my father's car 938 00:51:15,720 --> 00:51:18,048 pull up late at night, 939 00:51:18,804 --> 00:51:21,324 and they'd run and, like, put me under that bed. 940 00:51:21,403 --> 00:51:22,991 I can remember, like, hearing -- 941 00:51:23,016 --> 00:51:24,923 rolling under the bed. 942 00:51:25,559 --> 00:51:27,355 [ somber music plays ] 943 00:51:27,394 --> 00:51:29,766 When Jacinta got molested, 944 00:51:29,793 --> 00:51:33,188 this guy was babysitting when we went bowling. 945 00:51:34,621 --> 00:51:38,015 I seen the signs afterwards 'cause she was always crying, 946 00:51:38,030 --> 00:51:39,945 didn't want me to leave her there, 947 00:51:40,315 --> 00:51:41,942 and she was screaming, like, "No, mommy! 948 00:51:41,967 --> 00:51:43,532 No, mommy! No, mommy!" 949 00:51:43,908 --> 00:51:46,017 And I can picture now, like... 950 00:51:46,042 --> 00:51:47,786 why'd I leave her there? 951 00:51:49,037 --> 00:51:51,168 So I lived, like, in a lot of shame and guilt 952 00:51:51,190 --> 00:51:54,084 and, you know, resentment all my life. 953 00:51:56,030 --> 00:51:59,661 I feel like living in all that you can never move forward. 954 00:52:03,886 --> 00:52:07,204 AMANDA: Have you ever done any meditation or relaxation or... 955 00:52:07,225 --> 00:52:10,455 - Yeah, I've done all that, but when I get in this space... 956 00:52:10,480 --> 00:52:12,816 - I'm saying before you get this far, 957 00:52:13,648 --> 00:52:16,087 like, take some self -- some time. 958 00:52:16,112 --> 00:52:18,486 - Like, I can't -- I don't know what to do with the feelings, 959 00:52:18,511 --> 00:52:20,322 with the emotions that are going through -- 960 00:52:20,347 --> 00:52:21,682 - So scattered thoughts, basically? 961 00:52:21,698 --> 00:52:22,744 - Yeah. 962 00:52:22,783 --> 00:52:24,413 - 'Cause when your brain's like that, 963 00:52:24,433 --> 00:52:25,851 you just need to calm it down. 964 00:52:25,876 --> 00:52:27,367 You need to quiet it, right? 965 00:52:28,169 --> 00:52:31,413 - It's weighing on my mind about Jacinta, her using. 966 00:52:31,438 --> 00:52:33,440 I know I can't control it. 967 00:52:33,457 --> 00:52:34,560 AMANDA: Mm-hmm. Yep. 968 00:52:34,591 --> 00:52:37,869 You just gotta remember she's 27 years old. 969 00:52:37,894 --> 00:52:41,197 The more you separate, 970 00:52:41,222 --> 00:52:42,883 you know... 971 00:52:43,887 --> 00:52:45,702 the better for both of you. 972 00:52:48,767 --> 00:52:49,935 It's a hard life. 973 00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:51,330 [ voice breaking ] I know. 974 00:52:51,353 --> 00:52:52,681 [ sniffles ] 975 00:53:04,008 --> 00:53:08,456 [ cellphone rings ] 976 00:53:08,492 --> 00:53:10,414 - Hello? 977 00:53:10,419 --> 00:53:12,212 OPERATOR: You have a call from... 978 00:53:12,237 --> 00:53:15,216 - Rosemary. OPERATOR:...confined at 979 00:53:15,234 --> 00:53:17,865 a Maine Department of Corrections facility. 980 00:53:19,016 --> 00:53:20,296 You can do this. 981 00:53:21,156 --> 00:53:24,164 Do it for yourself honey, do it for Cay, please. 982 00:53:25,414 --> 00:53:26,638 Please just try it. 983 00:53:26,907 --> 00:53:28,496 I don't want to be sick, Mom. 984 00:53:29,303 --> 00:53:32,823 Okay, you won't be sick, they put you right on Suboxone. 985 00:53:35,174 --> 00:53:37,271 Please get over the sickness and get into the rehab. 986 00:53:39,196 --> 00:53:41,942 - I thought you just said they wouldn't let me be sick. 987 00:53:42,316 --> 00:53:44,479 Huh? They're not going to let you get sick, Jacinta, 988 00:53:44,516 --> 00:53:45,623 they're going to put you in detox. 989 00:53:46,758 --> 00:53:48,758 You're a perfect girl, Jacint. 990 00:53:49,062 --> 00:53:50,714 I'm proud of the daughter I got. 991 00:53:51,148 --> 00:53:53,574 Underneath all that mess there's a beautiful girl. 992 00:53:55,736 --> 00:53:58,536 But your daughter's starving for your love. 993 00:54:02,841 --> 00:54:04,521 You need to stop, Jacint. 994 00:54:05,985 --> 00:54:07,267 If not you're going to end up dead. 995 00:54:08,334 --> 00:54:10,507 You're supposed to be with your daughter, you're not there. 996 00:54:11,793 --> 00:54:13,811 Your kid's going to end up without a mother. 997 00:54:37,751 --> 00:54:40,417 It's been four months since I saw my daughter. 998 00:54:44,501 --> 00:54:46,757 I don't want Caylynn to see me when I'm using, 999 00:54:47,260 --> 00:54:49,676 but I know she wants to see me, 1000 00:54:50,078 --> 00:54:52,084 and I want to see her. 1001 00:54:57,264 --> 00:54:59,712 JOHN: Caylynn, Milky Ways? 1002 00:54:59,737 --> 00:55:02,074 Caylynn, why don't you guys pick up your candy? 1003 00:55:02,099 --> 00:55:04,254 - That's my mom. 1004 00:55:04,279 --> 00:55:07,115 WANDA: You're mama... 1005 00:55:07,155 --> 00:55:09,741 [ indistinct conversations ] 1006 00:55:14,398 --> 00:55:15,941 - Persistent, huh? 1007 00:55:15,966 --> 00:55:17,864 - Whose baby? 1008 00:55:17,917 --> 00:55:19,230 - It's my brother Shaun's baby. 1009 00:55:19,316 --> 00:55:20,621 JOHN: That's your brother Shaun's baby? 1010 00:55:20,651 --> 00:55:22,573 - Where's Uncle Shaun? - Hi. 1011 00:55:22,599 --> 00:55:24,191 JACINTA: He didn't come, baby. 1012 00:55:24,216 --> 00:55:26,254 - Mommy, how long are you staying? 1013 00:55:26,279 --> 00:55:29,473 WANDA: You got to go to bed really pretty quickly. 1014 00:55:29,593 --> 00:55:31,014 It's already your bedtime now. 1015 00:55:31,039 --> 00:55:33,062 I'm gonna let you stay for a short amount of time, but... 1016 00:55:33,747 --> 00:55:35,210 JOHN: I don't even like candy. 1017 00:55:35,222 --> 00:55:36,902 I'm just eating it. - No, it's only 7:30. 1018 00:55:36,927 --> 00:55:38,652 I don't have to go to bed for awhile. 1019 00:55:38,677 --> 00:55:40,097 [ indistinct conversation ] 1020 00:55:40,132 --> 00:55:42,583 - I don't have to go to bed. 1021 00:55:43,900 --> 00:55:45,651 - Gotta get some pictures, bubba. 1022 00:55:45,679 --> 00:55:47,586 [ chuckles ] 1023 00:55:48,557 --> 00:55:51,036 Here, take a couple pictures with mama. 1024 00:55:52,380 --> 00:55:55,803 [ sentimental music plays ] 1025 00:55:55,828 --> 00:55:59,206 ♪♪ 1026 00:55:59,231 --> 00:56:03,720 ♪♪ 1027 00:56:03,745 --> 00:56:06,967 [ indistinct conversations ] 1028 00:56:07,007 --> 00:56:08,896 JOHN: What did you get? 1029 00:56:09,119 --> 00:56:10,790 Where's the cheese balls? 1030 00:56:10,826 --> 00:56:12,414 - I don't have any. 1031 00:56:12,611 --> 00:56:15,795 [ indistinct conversations ] 1032 00:56:15,826 --> 00:56:19,242 ♪♪ 1033 00:56:20,937 --> 00:56:23,523 JACINTA: What you got there, bub? 1034 00:56:26,303 --> 00:56:28,643 This is my baby. 1035 00:56:28,862 --> 00:56:30,989 CAYLYNN: Who? - Ba-bay. 1036 00:56:31,031 --> 00:56:33,131 CAYLYNN: What did you say? - I said, "This is my baby." 1037 00:56:33,156 --> 00:56:34,772 CAYLYNN: Who? - You. 1038 00:56:34,797 --> 00:56:36,299 - Oh. 1039 00:56:39,122 --> 00:56:40,331 - Look at that butt. 1040 00:56:40,374 --> 00:56:42,083 - Stop! 1041 00:56:42,860 --> 00:56:44,693 - Where did you get all that? 1042 00:56:44,718 --> 00:56:46,351 You got that from me. [ chuckles ] 1043 00:56:47,174 --> 00:56:48,646 WANDA: You're going to be going to bed like, 1044 00:56:48,671 --> 00:56:49,681 real, real soon. 1045 00:56:49,706 --> 00:56:50,986 CAYLYNN: Where are you going? 1046 00:56:51,327 --> 00:56:53,198 - Get ready for bed. - No, Mommy. 1047 00:56:53,830 --> 00:56:57,108 - Listen, stand up. 1048 00:57:04,064 --> 00:57:06,399 [ bird caws ] 1049 00:57:11,340 --> 00:57:13,200 JACINTA: I'm just done. 1050 00:57:13,225 --> 00:57:15,728 I'm exhausted. 1051 00:57:16,931 --> 00:57:19,225 Caylynn is over it. 1052 00:57:19,250 --> 00:57:21,328 You can only tell them you're sorry so many times. 1053 00:57:23,496 --> 00:57:25,722 It's not even guilt anymore. It's not even shame anymore. 1054 00:57:25,752 --> 00:57:27,709 I don't know. 1055 00:57:28,115 --> 00:57:30,283 I don't know what it is. 1056 00:57:33,145 --> 00:57:35,523 I don't want to do this anymore. 1057 00:57:41,143 --> 00:57:44,241 Cold sweats, nausea, legs, everything. 1058 00:57:47,062 --> 00:57:48,608 Where's Lucky? 1059 00:57:48,633 --> 00:57:50,760 EARNSHAW: He's in the kitchen. 1060 00:57:54,683 --> 00:57:56,406 JACINTA: He said he wouldn't leave. 1061 00:57:59,810 --> 00:58:02,187 Oh, fuck! 1062 00:58:04,359 --> 00:58:05,435 She has 1063 00:58:06,495 --> 00:58:07,715 told me 1064 00:58:09,067 --> 00:58:10,747 to take her phone away 1065 00:58:11,313 --> 00:58:13,737 not let her get in contact with anybody. 1066 00:58:13,744 --> 00:58:15,061 Don't let her leave. 1067 00:58:15,117 --> 00:58:16,710 Don't give her a ride. 1068 00:58:16,757 --> 00:58:18,852 Has she ever tried to detox like this before? 1069 00:58:19,750 --> 00:58:21,842 Well, it starts and then 1070 00:58:21,873 --> 00:58:23,553 'Fuck this, fuck this!' 1071 00:58:28,694 --> 00:58:31,969 JACINTA: In detoxing, your muscles cramp. 1072 00:58:33,222 --> 00:58:34,667 You're restless. 1073 00:58:35,864 --> 00:58:37,455 The body aches. 1074 00:58:38,054 --> 00:58:40,545 Your temperature can't get right. 1075 00:58:40,994 --> 00:58:43,371 You're just in hell. 1076 00:58:46,208 --> 00:58:48,794 I can't fucking do this. 1077 00:58:50,781 --> 00:58:52,784 I need something to knock me the fuck out. 1078 00:58:58,178 --> 00:58:59,493 Ugh, fuck. 1079 00:59:05,852 --> 00:59:09,837 [ water running ] [ groans ] 1080 00:59:16,473 --> 00:59:17,923 Ow. 1081 00:59:23,862 --> 00:59:26,657 WOMAN: Hello? Jacint? 1082 00:59:28,122 --> 00:59:30,220 Jacint? Jacinta? 1083 00:59:30,245 --> 00:59:31,632 JACINTA: Hmm? 1084 00:59:31,659 --> 00:59:33,814 WOMAN: Please go to the hospital for tonight. 1085 00:59:33,839 --> 00:59:36,135 Baby, please do it for me. 1086 00:59:36,414 --> 00:59:37,892 JACINTA: [ groans ] 1087 00:59:37,968 --> 00:59:39,103 Please, baby. 1088 00:59:39,128 --> 00:59:40,196 - Hello? 1089 00:59:41,039 --> 00:59:42,041 Yeah. Lucky. 1090 00:59:42,621 --> 00:59:44,061 She's going to go. 1091 00:59:44,141 --> 00:59:45,249 She's gonna go? 1092 00:59:45,502 --> 00:59:46,502 She is. 1093 00:59:46,517 --> 00:59:48,380 Okay. 1094 00:59:48,395 --> 00:59:50,481 - I can't do this. 1095 00:59:50,506 --> 00:59:52,784 - Okay. 1096 00:59:52,809 --> 00:59:55,073 I need to get on the floor. I need to get on the floor. 1097 00:59:55,098 --> 00:59:57,233 I need to get on the floor. Please. 1098 00:59:58,559 --> 01:00:00,011 - How you doing? 1099 01:00:01,491 --> 01:00:03,424 - Don't touch me. 1100 01:00:03,456 --> 01:00:06,434 Let's go. Baby, let's go. Please, please. 1101 01:00:06,714 --> 01:00:08,550 - 10 more minutes. 1102 01:00:13,962 --> 01:00:15,498 WOMAN: Do you want me to pay for the methadone? 1103 01:00:15,523 --> 01:00:17,087 You want to go to the methadone tomorrow? 1104 01:00:17,618 --> 01:00:20,412 Or you want to just keep going straight like this? 1105 01:00:23,985 --> 01:00:25,903 'Cause I can't have you go back, Jacinta. 1106 01:00:25,932 --> 01:00:27,305 I can't have you go back to this stuff, 1107 01:00:30,286 --> 01:00:31,913 I don't want you to go back, Jacinta. 1108 01:00:31,938 --> 01:00:33,926 [ voice breaking ] I can't. I can't do this. 1109 01:00:46,726 --> 01:00:48,774 - Have we the pleasure of addressing 1110 01:00:48,830 --> 01:00:50,704 Mr. Scrooge or Mr. Marley? 1111 01:00:50,729 --> 01:00:52,397 - It's no pleasure to me, sir, 1112 01:00:52,414 --> 01:00:54,461 to be addressed by either of you. 1113 01:00:54,731 --> 01:00:56,167 - This is probably 1114 01:00:57,288 --> 01:00:59,587 the easiest detox I've ever been through. 1115 01:01:03,595 --> 01:01:05,266 I'm through it, Mom. 1116 01:01:06,375 --> 01:01:08,004 I'm through it. 1117 01:01:09,322 --> 01:01:11,235 Are you proud of me? 1118 01:01:13,726 --> 01:01:15,727 I won't, Mom. 1119 01:01:16,803 --> 01:01:18,593 I won't. 1120 01:01:23,632 --> 01:01:25,383 LUCKY: She detoxed for 3 days. 1121 01:01:27,151 --> 01:01:30,827 Now she wants to go spend quality time with her father. 1122 01:01:32,296 --> 01:01:34,311 Basically, she takes off. 1123 01:01:34,336 --> 01:01:35,957 Goes starts up again. 1124 01:01:37,124 --> 01:01:39,156 Those three days... 1125 01:01:39,219 --> 01:01:41,513 were for nothing. 1126 01:01:41,869 --> 01:01:43,704 [ somber music plays ] 1127 01:01:43,745 --> 01:01:46,093 ♪♪ 1128 01:01:46,118 --> 01:01:51,081 ♪♪ 1129 01:01:54,294 --> 01:01:55,924 SHAUN: I know how smart she is. 1130 01:01:55,939 --> 01:01:57,629 I know what she can accomplish. 1131 01:01:59,838 --> 01:02:02,754 She's way smarter than me, 1132 01:02:02,779 --> 01:02:04,629 but, you know, let's face it, 1133 01:02:04,638 --> 01:02:07,144 Lewiston-Auburn is not a good place to kick a habit. 1134 01:02:10,829 --> 01:02:12,839 There's nothing good in Lewiston. 1135 01:02:12,891 --> 01:02:16,373 Lewiston is an old mill town. 1136 01:02:16,612 --> 01:02:18,280 Drugs. 1137 01:02:18,755 --> 01:02:20,732 Jacinta knows everybody. 1138 01:02:22,772 --> 01:02:25,123 She knows everybody. 1139 01:02:27,877 --> 01:02:29,371 RICK: Where is she now? 1140 01:02:29,396 --> 01:02:31,748 She's been gone 40 minutes with the truck. 1141 01:02:32,374 --> 01:02:34,633 I hate this life. I fucking hate it. 1142 01:02:34,658 --> 01:02:36,195 EARNSHAW: When you heard that she was detoxing, 1143 01:02:36,220 --> 01:02:37,508 did you believe it was going to happen? 1144 01:02:37,549 --> 01:02:38,675 - No. 1145 01:02:38,700 --> 01:02:39,923 Nope. 1146 01:02:40,552 --> 01:02:41,798 No. 1147 01:02:46,079 --> 01:02:47,580 No. 1148 01:02:53,538 --> 01:02:55,707 [ dog whines ] 1149 01:03:22,442 --> 01:03:24,499 MAN: What's the matter? MAN 1150 01:03:24,524 --> 01:03:26,256 we had a thunderstorm last night? 1151 01:03:26,281 --> 01:03:27,898 WOMAN: Yeah, we were just saying how much... 1152 01:03:28,793 --> 01:03:30,536 RICK: Christmas used to be a big thing. 1153 01:03:31,474 --> 01:03:32,975 Presents -- 1154 01:03:33,000 --> 01:03:34,756 There's always one hidden in the tree 1155 01:03:34,781 --> 01:03:37,119 that she'd have to find, yeah. 1156 01:03:37,814 --> 01:03:40,028 10:30, 11:00, then we'd go to bed. 1157 01:03:40,071 --> 01:03:41,781 Then she'd wake up the next morning, 1158 01:03:41,806 --> 01:03:43,141 and all the trees be cut. 1159 01:03:43,166 --> 01:03:44,608 "Santa did come! Santa did come!" 1160 01:03:44,633 --> 01:03:45,741 Yeah. 1161 01:03:45,766 --> 01:03:47,351 I don't know. 1162 01:03:47,376 --> 01:03:49,962 We had a lot of good times. 1163 01:03:50,998 --> 01:03:53,778 - Then it just became money in an envelope. 1164 01:03:54,426 --> 01:03:58,810 [ laughs ] 1165 01:03:58,835 --> 01:04:01,175 "Merry Christmas, kid." - That wasn't very nice. 1166 01:04:01,203 --> 01:04:02,858 That's right. What am I supposed to do? 1167 01:04:02,883 --> 01:04:03,911 - Mm-hmm. 1168 01:04:03,923 --> 01:04:05,888 - I don't know what the hell to buy you. Here, 1169 01:04:06,186 --> 01:04:07,202 money in the envelope, 1170 01:04:07,222 --> 01:04:09,403 That's -- That's well put. 1171 01:04:09,429 --> 01:04:11,059 That's what it is. 1172 01:04:11,102 --> 01:04:14,296 [ Mariah Carey's All I Want For Christmas Is You plays ] 1173 01:04:14,328 --> 01:04:17,448 - Christmas. 1174 01:04:17,479 --> 01:04:20,089 CAREY: ♪ I ♪ 1175 01:04:20,106 --> 01:04:23,739 ♪ Don't want a lot for Christmas ♪ 1176 01:04:23,755 --> 01:04:27,667 ♪ There is just one thing I need ♪ 1177 01:04:27,692 --> 01:04:29,605 - I'm so excited for Christmas. 1178 01:04:29,630 --> 01:04:31,214 JOHN: Yeah, we know. 1179 01:04:31,239 --> 01:04:34,159 - I'm just -- I'm just in that spirit, you know? 1180 01:04:34,184 --> 01:04:36,139 I just love it. It's full of joy. 1181 01:04:36,168 --> 01:04:37,548 WANDA: As long as you're good, you know, 1182 01:04:37,573 --> 01:04:40,009 'cause Santa Claus don't get bad kids anything. 1183 01:04:40,547 --> 01:04:42,960 - Santa Claus... 1184 01:04:42,991 --> 01:04:47,058 can climb up the chimney and walk on out. 1185 01:04:47,083 --> 01:04:49,877 JOHN: That ain't the Christmas spirit. 1186 01:04:54,811 --> 01:04:58,815 [ sentimental music plays ] 1187 01:04:58,840 --> 01:05:03,878 ♪♪ 1188 01:05:03,903 --> 01:05:07,732 ♪♪ 1189 01:05:07,757 --> 01:05:14,097 ♪♪ 1190 01:05:14,122 --> 01:05:20,545 ♪♪ 1191 01:05:20,577 --> 01:05:26,272 ♪♪ 1192 01:05:26,297 --> 01:05:28,428 RICH: No, I never expected this to happen, 1193 01:05:28,446 --> 01:05:30,358 honestly, growing up. 1194 01:05:30,383 --> 01:05:35,972 ♪♪ 1195 01:05:35,997 --> 01:05:40,475 ♪♪ 1196 01:05:40,482 --> 01:05:45,137 Over time when Rosemary asked to see Jacinta, to visit, 1197 01:05:46,031 --> 01:05:48,879 I took Jacinta there to visit Rosemary, 1198 01:05:48,903 --> 01:05:51,201 and I'd pick her up. 1199 01:05:51,730 --> 01:05:53,620 You know... 1200 01:05:53,641 --> 01:05:56,257 she's got to see her mother. 1201 01:05:56,282 --> 01:05:59,086 You know, can't keep them apart. 1202 01:05:59,674 --> 01:06:02,181 Started going sour when she was, what, 10 or 11. 1203 01:06:02,682 --> 01:06:05,560 She wanted to move in with her mother, 1204 01:06:05,585 --> 01:06:07,726 and Rosemary really wanted her back. 1205 01:06:09,928 --> 01:06:12,523 Somehow, some way, it got to the point where... 1206 01:06:14,467 --> 01:06:17,764 Jacinta can make up her own mind. 1207 01:06:17,789 --> 01:06:19,663 And I don't know what the age is, 1208 01:06:19,688 --> 01:06:22,744 whether it's 13 or 14 in the state of Maine. 1209 01:06:23,070 --> 01:06:24,905 If they want to stay with their, 1210 01:06:24,930 --> 01:06:27,601 you know, their mother, they can, 1211 01:06:27,623 --> 01:06:29,020 if they want to stay with their father, so 1212 01:06:29,027 --> 01:06:30,908 that would've been another fight in court 1213 01:06:32,098 --> 01:06:34,167 basically. 1214 01:06:34,194 --> 01:06:35,725 And it was like, "Okay, Jacinta. 1215 01:06:35,750 --> 01:06:37,537 Give it a shot. See what happens." 1216 01:06:49,479 --> 01:06:51,943 CAYLYNN: I had letters from my mom 1217 01:06:52,467 --> 01:06:54,681 circling around my room. 1218 01:06:54,969 --> 01:06:58,268 I remember my grandmother had told me -- 1219 01:06:58,346 --> 01:07:00,626 the one that I live with... 1220 01:07:00,656 --> 01:07:03,961 She had told me, "I know you're sad now, 1221 01:07:04,020 --> 01:07:07,611 and I know it doesn't feel good, but once you're older, 1222 01:07:07,662 --> 01:07:09,301 you're not gonna be sad anymore. 1223 01:07:09,326 --> 01:07:12,246 You're gonna be mad," and I didn't believe her. 1224 01:07:12,271 --> 01:07:14,242 I was like, "I'm never gonna be mad at my mom or dad." 1225 01:07:14,447 --> 01:07:17,162 Like, I was a little kid, and I didn't understand it. 1226 01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:18,738 But, um... 1227 01:07:18,763 --> 01:07:22,745 And, um...I started to get angry with them. 1228 01:07:23,794 --> 01:07:26,273 My mom hasn't called me in, like, three months. 1229 01:07:33,549 --> 01:07:35,043 If you don't want to be a part of my life, 1230 01:07:35,055 --> 01:07:36,726 don't be a part of it. 1231 01:07:44,658 --> 01:07:47,448 JACINTA: Caylynn said, "I can't take this. 1232 01:07:47,457 --> 01:07:49,409 It's the same old song. 'I wish we could. 1233 01:07:49,434 --> 01:07:51,816 Maybe we could. Could we maybe.'" 1234 01:07:52,003 --> 01:07:55,511 I said, "Cay, baby, what are you talking about? 1235 01:07:55,536 --> 01:07:57,105 Tell me more, princess." 1236 01:07:57,130 --> 01:07:59,058 "It's so hard to love someone like this, 1237 01:07:59,075 --> 01:08:00,622 caught in a blizzard, 1238 01:08:00,650 --> 01:08:03,227 but my heart can't take another civil war." 1239 01:08:03,252 --> 01:08:04,478 - Holy fuck. 1240 01:08:04,503 --> 01:08:07,070 - "The only thing you say you care about is me. 1241 01:08:07,095 --> 01:08:11,539 We both know it's money, drugs, and Lucky, 1242 01:08:11,564 --> 01:08:14,382 who you say you love, but you don't. 1243 01:08:14,407 --> 01:08:17,049 So, stop taking me in your -- 1244 01:08:17,070 --> 01:08:20,104 stop taking me in your twisted lies 1245 01:08:20,129 --> 01:08:22,229 because I don't need them." 1246 01:08:22,254 --> 01:08:24,479 WOMAN: Jacinta... 1247 01:08:25,022 --> 01:08:26,277 You got to do this, honey, 1248 01:08:26,302 --> 01:08:28,881 if it means going to the middle of fucking nowhere... 1249 01:08:30,046 --> 01:08:33,299 to a treatment center, like... 1250 01:08:33,835 --> 01:08:36,190 - She just wants me to leave her alone. 1251 01:08:48,392 --> 01:08:51,022 [ chuckles ] 1252 01:08:51,140 --> 01:08:53,850 JACINTA: Caylynn has told me she doesn't want to talk to me, 1253 01:08:55,132 --> 01:08:57,467 stay out of her life. 1254 01:08:57,736 --> 01:09:00,109 My baby knows how to make the right decision. 1255 01:09:02,263 --> 01:09:04,446 I'm proud of her. 1256 01:09:05,224 --> 01:09:08,440 I know that if she keeps that skill in her life, 1257 01:09:08,675 --> 01:09:10,234 protecting herself, 1258 01:09:10,413 --> 01:09:13,188 she's always gonna have peace at heart. 1259 01:09:15,545 --> 01:09:18,355 Have I made the choice to get high 1260 01:09:18,380 --> 01:09:20,674 instead of see my child? 1261 01:09:20,699 --> 01:09:23,073 Yes. 1262 01:09:23,258 --> 01:09:26,587 But it's not where my heart ever wanted to be. 1263 01:09:27,036 --> 01:09:30,081 [ TV plays indistinctly ] 1264 01:09:34,875 --> 01:09:37,043 LUCKY: Susan... 1265 01:09:37,828 --> 01:09:39,037 - Hi, baby. 1266 01:09:39,062 --> 01:09:40,294 LUCKY: Hi. 1267 01:09:40,319 --> 01:09:42,029 Want a hit? 1268 01:09:51,338 --> 01:09:53,679 - Lucky! 1269 01:09:53,704 --> 01:09:57,586 Lucky was the man that was gonna protect me and... 1270 01:09:58,156 --> 01:10:00,595 pull me out of it, you know what I mean? 1271 01:10:02,725 --> 01:10:06,523 The non-addict is way up here, and the addict's down here, 1272 01:10:06,548 --> 01:10:09,578 and they reach up for somebody for help, 1273 01:10:09,599 --> 01:10:11,273 and instead of them pulling you up, 1274 01:10:11,298 --> 01:10:12,898 you pull them down. 1275 01:10:17,880 --> 01:10:21,096 Yeah, I feel like I don't even got a choice anymore. 1276 01:10:21,597 --> 01:10:22,767 Like... 1277 01:10:24,011 --> 01:10:26,018 I have -- I have to get high. 1278 01:10:26,043 --> 01:10:27,461 Like... 1279 01:10:27,494 --> 01:10:29,494 it's just what my life is. 1280 01:10:29,521 --> 01:10:32,233 [ somber music plays ] 1281 01:10:32,258 --> 01:10:39,515 ♪♪ 1282 01:10:39,540 --> 01:10:46,218 ♪♪ 1283 01:10:46,242 --> 01:10:49,949 ♪♪ 1284 01:10:49,974 --> 01:10:51,310 See the amount of this? 1285 01:10:51,341 --> 01:10:52,450 EARNSHAW: Mm-hmm. 1286 01:10:52,457 --> 01:10:53,810 JACINTA: That's pure fentanyl. 1287 01:10:53,835 --> 01:10:56,548 It's just extremely powerful. 1288 01:11:00,774 --> 01:11:02,510 BILLIE: Jacinta's died before. 1289 01:11:03,152 --> 01:11:05,581 Her dad told me he brought her back to life. 1290 01:11:06,264 --> 01:11:07,804 He slapped the shit out of her a few times. 1291 01:11:07,829 --> 01:11:09,636 She came out of it. 1292 01:11:10,798 --> 01:11:12,529 CAYLYNN: People have tried talking to her. 1293 01:11:12,554 --> 01:11:13,618 She's tried counseling. 1294 01:11:13,644 --> 01:11:16,401 She's tried rehab, prison, sober house. 1295 01:11:16,417 --> 01:11:18,259 She got kicked out of the sober house. 1296 01:11:18,630 --> 01:11:20,629 She stopped therapy on her own. 1297 01:11:20,654 --> 01:11:23,058 She's went back to jail several times, 1298 01:11:23,083 --> 01:11:26,038 and I've tried to explain to her over and over and over. 1299 01:11:26,063 --> 01:11:28,069 It ju-- It goes in one ear and right out the other. 1300 01:11:28,094 --> 01:11:30,877 I just don't know what she should do. 1301 01:11:30,902 --> 01:11:33,404 [ somber music plays ] 1302 01:11:33,429 --> 01:11:36,070 ♪♪ 1303 01:11:36,095 --> 01:11:38,312 [ inhales sharply ] 1304 01:11:38,746 --> 01:11:40,817 - All we can do is hope... 1305 01:11:41,718 --> 01:11:44,154 that it ends. 1306 01:11:44,465 --> 01:11:45,981 'Cause I really don't see... 1307 01:11:46,056 --> 01:11:47,712 I really don't see it ending. 1308 01:11:49,297 --> 01:11:51,810 Not unless something drastic happened to her. 1309 01:11:52,451 --> 01:11:54,328 You know? 1310 01:11:55,545 --> 01:12:01,224 ♪♪ 1311 01:12:03,778 --> 01:12:05,058 I have a caller. 1312 01:12:05,200 --> 01:12:07,400 She believes a truckload of males 1313 01:12:07,696 --> 01:12:09,564 is outside the house and is going 1314 01:12:09,589 --> 01:12:11,244 to break in and hurt her family. 1315 01:12:12,048 --> 01:12:14,048 They're outside the house now. 1316 01:12:14,307 --> 01:12:16,319 Do you know if any of them have any weapons on them? 1317 01:12:16,916 --> 01:12:18,409 Yeah, someone said he had a knife. 1318 01:12:20,013 --> 01:12:21,700 So who's in the house right now? 1319 01:12:21,879 --> 01:12:23,870 My dad's there, my brother's there, his wife is there, 1320 01:12:23,910 --> 01:12:25,119 and their two children are there. 1321 01:12:26,638 --> 01:12:27,825 Is somebody on their way there yet? 1322 01:12:27,872 --> 01:12:29,962 Yep, we have a couple of officers on the way. 1323 01:12:30,612 --> 01:12:32,113 [ sirens wail ] 1324 01:12:32,138 --> 01:12:33,889 GAGNON: Jacinta heard a pocket dial 1325 01:12:33,914 --> 01:12:35,346 where they were talking about 1326 01:12:35,351 --> 01:12:37,858 busting into her dad's house. 1327 01:12:37,893 --> 01:12:39,769 Jacinta wasn't there. 1328 01:12:39,794 --> 01:12:41,784 She called 911. 1329 01:12:41,973 --> 01:12:45,156 Turned out, it was some local people 1330 01:12:45,194 --> 01:12:47,534 that are suspected of being drug dealers. 1331 01:12:49,453 --> 01:12:52,518 Jacinta stole $60,000 worth of drugs. 1332 01:12:52,543 --> 01:12:56,005 These guys were looking to harm her. 1333 01:12:57,809 --> 01:13:00,806 I got a call from Jacinta's father. 1334 01:13:00,831 --> 01:13:03,525 He heard people were out to do harm to her. 1335 01:13:04,483 --> 01:13:05,984 Rick had given me the information about 1336 01:13:06,009 --> 01:13:08,376 the vehicle that Jacinta was driving. 1337 01:13:11,573 --> 01:13:13,114 - He asked me, "How much does she have? 1338 01:13:13,139 --> 01:13:15,103 What did she steal?" I said, "I don't know. 1339 01:13:15,120 --> 01:13:16,739 Honestly, I don't know. 1340 01:13:16,764 --> 01:13:18,035 You know, I just know that these people 1341 01:13:18,060 --> 01:13:19,559 are after her because she ripped them off. 1342 01:13:19,562 --> 01:13:21,693 Why she ripped them off, I don't know." 1343 01:13:21,735 --> 01:13:23,850 Mm-hmm. I said, "I hope you get her before they get her." 1344 01:13:25,311 --> 01:13:29,899 ♪♪ 1345 01:13:29,924 --> 01:13:32,651 ♪♪ 1346 01:13:33,413 --> 01:13:34,840 Yeah, this is the room, yeah. 1347 01:13:34,861 --> 01:13:36,021 That's what they said. 1348 01:13:36,195 --> 01:13:37,715 [ door opens ] 1349 01:13:37,781 --> 01:13:39,615 Oh, fuck! 1350 01:13:40,003 --> 01:13:42,121 No, no, I didn't know that was in there. 1351 01:13:42,223 --> 01:13:44,068 I didn't know that was in here. 1352 01:13:44,170 --> 01:13:46,377 I swear to God, I didn't know that was in here. 1353 01:13:47,344 --> 01:13:48,666 I'm going to read you your rights, okay? 1354 01:13:48,695 --> 01:13:49,840 Before you say anything else. 1355 01:13:49,842 --> 01:13:51,309 You have the absolute right to remain silent. 1356 01:13:51,340 --> 01:13:53,960 Do you understand that? Huh? - Yes. 1357 01:13:54,180 --> 01:13:56,241 Anything you say can be used against you in a court of law. 1358 01:13:56,265 --> 01:13:58,198 Do you understand that? - Yes. 1359 01:13:58,730 --> 01:14:01,277 But the good thing is, your bail is probably going to be so high 1360 01:14:01,316 --> 01:14:03,712 you won't have to worry about those guys killing you. 1361 01:14:05,950 --> 01:14:07,601 - Can you call my dad? - OFFICER: Okay. 1362 01:14:08,574 --> 01:14:09,879 JACINTA: Please? [ sniffles ] 1363 01:14:10,553 --> 01:14:12,891 Alright Rick, you're on speaker with Jacinta. 1364 01:14:14,124 --> 01:14:15,124 Hello? 1365 01:14:16,267 --> 01:14:17,267 Hi Daddy. 1366 01:14:18,120 --> 01:14:19,120 I love you. 1367 01:14:19,626 --> 01:14:20,626 I love you. 1368 01:14:22,880 --> 01:14:23,880 Daddy... 1369 01:14:23,964 --> 01:14:24,964 What? 1370 01:14:24,987 --> 01:14:25,987 I'm scared. 1371 01:14:27,546 --> 01:14:29,066 There's a lot here. 1372 01:14:29,554 --> 01:14:30,554 Oh boy. 1373 01:14:35,878 --> 01:14:37,558 I hate that sickness. 1374 01:14:39,014 --> 01:14:42,278 If they give me a bail, are you going to get me out? 1375 01:14:42,983 --> 01:14:44,618 Yeah, if they give you a bail. 1376 01:14:47,196 --> 01:14:48,196 Rick. 1377 01:14:48,984 --> 01:14:49,984 Rick. 1378 01:14:50,199 --> 01:14:51,436 Yeah? - To be honest, 1379 01:14:51,495 --> 01:14:53,310 she's probably going to be safer if you don't 1380 01:14:53,334 --> 01:14:54,654 bail her out at this point. 1381 01:14:54,785 --> 01:14:56,918 Well, okay I understand that too. 1382 01:14:57,397 --> 01:14:59,531 Yeah you're probably right, yeah. 1383 01:14:59,574 --> 01:15:00,574 Absolutely. 1384 01:15:00,959 --> 01:15:01,959 Daddy? 1385 01:15:02,000 --> 01:15:04,424 Right now, you know that's probably the safest thing. 1386 01:15:04,463 --> 01:15:05,477 The best thing. 1387 01:15:05,501 --> 01:15:07,015 I will not leave your side. 1388 01:15:09,464 --> 01:15:12,472 But 'Cint, you've got to stop somehow, some way. 1389 01:15:13,830 --> 01:15:15,510 What about Caylynn Daddy? 1390 01:15:15,516 --> 01:15:16,577 [ sobs ] 1391 01:15:18,389 --> 01:15:19,429 I don't know. 1392 01:15:30,765 --> 01:15:33,480 OFFICER: Nobody in this room's gonna hurt you, okay? 1393 01:15:33,654 --> 01:15:35,827 You are not free to leave, okay? 1394 01:15:35,847 --> 01:15:40,401 We're here t-t-to take control of this, okay? 1395 01:15:40,614 --> 01:15:42,392 You're going down the rabbit hole, 1396 01:15:42,417 --> 01:15:44,205 and we want to pull you back out. 1397 01:15:44,543 --> 01:15:45,914 Does that make sense? 1398 01:15:45,921 --> 01:15:47,631 Okay. 1399 01:15:56,150 --> 01:15:57,948 Can we get you something to drink? 1400 01:15:57,991 --> 01:15:59,328 - I'm okay. 1401 01:15:59,351 --> 01:16:00,562 OFFICER: Huh? - I'm okay. 1402 01:16:00,598 --> 01:16:02,169 OFFICER: You're okay? You sure? 1403 01:16:02,187 --> 01:16:03,354 - Yeah. 1404 01:16:05,731 --> 01:16:07,282 OFFICER: Okay. 1405 01:16:07,307 --> 01:16:09,583 So why do you think you're in here? 1406 01:16:13,669 --> 01:16:14,755 - Um... 1407 01:16:14,783 --> 01:16:16,115 'Cause of all the drugs? 1408 01:16:16,161 --> 01:16:17,630 - Mm-hmm. 1409 01:16:17,655 --> 01:16:20,911 Where have you been living? 1410 01:16:22,995 --> 01:16:24,110 Kind of everywhere. 1411 01:16:24,135 --> 01:16:25,832 - Kind of everywhere. Why? 1412 01:16:26,415 --> 01:16:28,949 'Cause I don't want to use at my dad's. 1413 01:16:28,965 --> 01:16:31,744 - Mm-hmm. And why is that? 1414 01:16:36,847 --> 01:16:38,847 Because he doesn't deserve it. 1415 01:16:42,726 --> 01:16:45,437 [ cicadas humming ] 1416 01:16:45,462 --> 01:16:47,002 RICK: Whoever did it, whatever was said... 1417 01:16:47,039 --> 01:16:48,486 I know what I told Nick -- 1418 01:16:48,511 --> 01:16:50,346 what the car was and stuff. BILLIE: Mm-hmm. 1419 01:16:50,371 --> 01:16:51,744 - He asked me, did I know where she was? 1420 01:16:51,769 --> 01:16:53,033 I said, "No." - Exactly. 1421 01:16:53,058 --> 01:16:55,208 - Bottom line is, she's still alive, 1422 01:16:55,233 --> 01:16:56,836 So...I mean, she could be dead. 1423 01:16:56,861 --> 01:16:58,689 BILLIE: Yeah. - So... 1424 01:16:59,129 --> 01:17:00,964 - You were worried. - I don't -- I don't care. 1425 01:17:00,989 --> 01:17:03,025 - You weren't ratting her out. You were worried. 1426 01:17:03,050 --> 01:17:04,499 But I would. - No, I wanted her pulled over, 1427 01:17:04,524 --> 01:17:05,635 is what I told him. 1428 01:17:05,996 --> 01:17:07,336 BILLIE: Oh, geez. 1429 01:17:07,373 --> 01:17:09,505 You knew she had all that shit on her. 1430 01:17:09,525 --> 01:17:10,588 - I know she had it on her. 1431 01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:13,425 Seem like you're directing it like I ratted her out, 1432 01:17:13,431 --> 01:17:15,086 and I didn't rat her out. 1433 01:17:15,150 --> 01:17:17,444 - In a way, you kinda did. - That's your opinion. 1434 01:17:17,469 --> 01:17:19,385 - But, I mean, that's -- - That's you're opinion. 1435 01:17:19,385 --> 01:17:21,683 - You didn't rat -- Yeah, but I'm saying to you, 1436 01:17:21,689 --> 01:17:23,750 you didn't rat her out to get her in trouble. 1437 01:17:23,775 --> 01:17:26,726 You ratted out -- her out because you were scared. 1438 01:17:34,830 --> 01:17:36,830 Why are you in here right now? 1439 01:17:37,157 --> 01:17:38,560 Why are you in the hospital? 1440 01:17:38,628 --> 01:17:41,883 - 'Cause I was detoxing and... 1441 01:17:41,907 --> 01:17:43,990 NURSE: Had a seizure. 1442 01:17:43,993 --> 01:17:48,043 She just was going through a bad detox. 1443 01:17:48,088 --> 01:17:49,946 - They caught me with... 1444 01:17:49,971 --> 01:17:52,508 2 ounces of heroin and an ounce of crack. 1445 01:18:00,175 --> 01:18:03,392 [ somber music plays ] 1446 01:18:03,425 --> 01:18:09,306 ♪♪ 1447 01:18:09,331 --> 01:18:15,045 ♪♪ 1448 01:18:15,070 --> 01:18:21,034 ♪♪ 1449 01:18:21,059 --> 01:18:24,204 ♪♪ 1450 01:18:24,229 --> 01:18:30,435 ♪♪ 1451 01:18:30,460 --> 01:18:34,626 ♪♪ 1452 01:18:34,651 --> 01:18:36,680 ♪♪ 1453 01:18:36,705 --> 01:18:41,084 EARNSHAW: Can you tell me... how you got all of that? 1454 01:18:42,883 --> 01:18:45,015 - Yeah. I, um... 1455 01:18:45,684 --> 01:18:48,264 I saw a drug dealer open his safe, 1456 01:18:50,044 --> 01:18:53,505 and I saw the combination. 1457 01:18:56,486 --> 01:18:57,650 EARNSHAW: And... 1458 01:18:57,675 --> 01:18:59,487 I literally walked a ledge 1459 01:18:59,512 --> 01:19:03,001 across a roof this big. 1460 01:19:03,822 --> 01:19:05,954 If I didn't -- If I didn't die getting there, 1461 01:19:05,979 --> 01:19:09,001 I was gonna die doing the drugs. 1462 01:19:09,374 --> 01:19:11,008 I didn't care. 1463 01:19:15,547 --> 01:19:17,080 [ sighs ] 1464 01:19:24,571 --> 01:19:25,946 [ TV plays indistinctly ] 1465 01:19:25,971 --> 01:19:28,813 BILLIE: 479 people are talking about this post 1466 01:19:28,838 --> 01:19:30,673 of her being arrested. 1467 01:19:30,698 --> 01:19:33,555 A lot of people wrote some nasty comments. 1468 01:19:34,650 --> 01:19:37,052 "Addiction or not, you have choices." 1469 01:19:37,500 --> 01:19:39,002 "What a surprise. 1470 01:19:39,027 --> 01:19:41,313 Another scum-sucking lowlife loser." 1471 01:19:46,519 --> 01:19:49,211 RICH: Jacinta's in this situation because of Rosemary. 1472 01:19:50,953 --> 01:19:52,753 Had she never started or did any crack 1473 01:19:52,778 --> 01:19:55,727 with her daughter or her sons... 1474 01:19:55,752 --> 01:19:57,175 they wouldn't be there. 1475 01:19:57,376 --> 01:19:59,716 This wouldn't have happened. 1476 01:19:59,758 --> 01:20:01,897 Absolutely. 1477 01:20:02,563 --> 01:20:04,672 - When Jacinta was 15, 1478 01:20:04,705 --> 01:20:06,663 Rosemary put her out on the street to suck dick 1479 01:20:06,677 --> 01:20:09,059 so Rosemary didn't have to. 1480 01:20:09,104 --> 01:20:11,116 You didn't know that? You didn't know that? 1481 01:20:11,140 --> 01:20:13,609 EARNSHAW: She didn't tell me that. 1482 01:20:13,642 --> 01:20:15,858 - Every time she's out, them two run together. 1483 01:20:15,869 --> 01:20:18,789 [ buzzer blares ] 1484 01:20:18,814 --> 01:20:22,206 [ door opens, closes ] 1485 01:20:22,231 --> 01:20:24,959 OFFICER: Control. Elevator 1B up to three, please. 1486 01:20:24,984 --> 01:20:28,313 [ radio chirps, door unlocks ] 1487 01:20:32,995 --> 01:20:35,836 EARNSHAW: Were you prostituting at 15? 1488 01:20:39,463 --> 01:20:41,498 Did your mom... 1489 01:20:41,523 --> 01:20:43,748 kind of push you out there a little bit? 1490 01:20:49,990 --> 01:20:52,393 - I don't think my mom meant to hurt me. 1491 01:20:55,564 --> 01:20:57,893 She didn't know any better. 1492 01:21:00,005 --> 01:21:03,494 I...admire... 1493 01:21:03,519 --> 01:21:06,455 [voice breaking] my mom. 1494 01:21:07,063 --> 01:21:10,252 She's... 1495 01:21:10,851 --> 01:21:13,298 the strongest, most beautiful woman 1496 01:21:13,323 --> 01:21:16,577 I've ever met in my life. 1497 01:21:16,602 --> 01:21:19,188 She just... 1498 01:21:19,796 --> 01:21:22,522 She wasn't taught... 1499 01:21:24,599 --> 01:21:26,502 ...how to mother. 1500 01:21:27,809 --> 01:21:30,186 [ sniffles ] 1501 01:21:37,314 --> 01:21:39,998 CAYLYNN: I'm very upset with my mom. 1502 01:21:40,437 --> 01:21:42,653 I ain't talked to her. 1503 01:21:42,667 --> 01:21:45,302 When she tried to call, I kept declining it, 1504 01:21:46,292 --> 01:21:48,560 but she sent me letters, 1505 01:21:48,585 --> 01:21:51,435 basically, apologizing. 1506 01:21:57,811 --> 01:22:01,139 I haven't done to Caylynn what my mom has done to me, 1507 01:22:01,443 --> 01:22:02,906 but I've done certain things, 1508 01:22:02,930 --> 01:22:05,539 like not be there when I should be, 1509 01:22:06,797 --> 01:22:08,477 but I love Caylynn enough 1510 01:22:09,049 --> 01:22:10,729 to protect her from me 1511 01:22:11,014 --> 01:22:12,374 and my lifestyle. 1512 01:22:15,686 --> 01:22:18,381 But I think if Caylynn was my age 1513 01:22:19,111 --> 01:22:21,331 and resented me, it would kill me, 1514 01:22:21,553 --> 01:22:24,453 because all I wanted to do was what was right. 1515 01:22:26,321 --> 01:22:27,321 I chose 1516 01:22:29,116 --> 01:22:30,476 to follow my Mom. 1517 01:22:30,492 --> 01:22:32,340 I chose to 1518 01:22:32,578 --> 01:22:34,488 let her do the things she was doing 1519 01:22:38,417 --> 01:22:40,097 because I just wanted 1520 01:22:41,123 --> 01:22:42,856 just wanted to be with her. 1521 01:22:44,090 --> 01:22:46,218 [ buzzer blares ] 1522 01:22:53,675 --> 01:22:54,767 RICH: Hello? 1523 01:22:54,792 --> 01:22:56,955 JACINTA: Hello. RICH: Hey, honey. 1524 01:22:56,968 --> 01:22:58,255 JACINTA: [ voice breaking ]Hey, Daddy. 1525 01:22:58,280 --> 01:22:59,464 RICH: What's wrong? 1526 01:22:59,474 --> 01:23:01,815 JACINTA: My lawyer just came in. 1527 01:23:01,835 --> 01:23:04,036 His words were, "There's no other way to put it, 1528 01:23:04,061 --> 01:23:06,591 but you're in a world of shit." 1529 01:23:06,616 --> 01:23:08,618 RICH: What the hell does that mean? 1530 01:23:08,643 --> 01:23:11,349 JACINTA: It's a mandatory minimum of 15 years. 1531 01:23:11,374 --> 01:23:12,792 RICH: 15?! 1532 01:23:12,817 --> 01:23:14,694 JACINTA: Yeah. 1533 01:23:14,719 --> 01:23:17,029 RICH: Oh, my God. 1534 01:23:17,054 --> 01:23:18,889 JACINTA: He's gonna try to fight this 1535 01:23:18,914 --> 01:23:21,521 as much as he can. 1536 01:23:21,546 --> 01:23:24,132 RICH: [ sighing ] Oh. 1537 01:23:35,344 --> 01:23:36,895 LAWYER: Based on the quantity of the drugs, 1538 01:23:36,930 --> 01:23:40,298 she was looking at substantial prison time. 1539 01:23:40,596 --> 01:23:42,473 But I think all the parties involved, 1540 01:23:42,498 --> 01:23:43,571 including the prosecution, 1541 01:23:43,596 --> 01:23:46,119 realized the environment she grew up in. 1542 01:23:46,144 --> 01:23:48,783 She's become a product of her environment. 1543 01:23:49,081 --> 01:23:50,754 Originally, my goal 1544 01:23:50,761 --> 01:23:53,875 was to get her into treatment out of the area. 1545 01:23:54,765 --> 01:23:57,721 During this whole time, though, Jacinta was also asking me 1546 01:23:57,746 --> 01:24:00,166 to get a plea offer, get a plea offer. 1547 01:24:09,466 --> 01:24:12,675 She wants to plead guilty and I can't talk her out of it. 1548 01:24:17,652 --> 01:24:19,838 She doesn't want to stay at the county anymore. 1549 01:24:27,364 --> 01:24:29,533 - Okay. 1550 01:24:31,420 --> 01:24:34,326 She's looking at a four-year mandatory minimum. 1551 01:24:35,768 --> 01:24:37,763 JUDGE: Well, you haven't really had a chance 1552 01:24:37,788 --> 01:24:40,619 to kind of develop your best, you know, defense 1553 01:24:40,659 --> 01:24:43,375 or your best, what we call, mitigation, in terms of why, 1554 01:24:43,390 --> 01:24:45,306 what the sentence should be for you. 1555 01:24:45,331 --> 01:24:48,298 I'm really asking you to consider 1556 01:24:48,323 --> 01:24:50,623 delaying your plea 1557 01:24:50,648 --> 01:24:52,126 until next month. 1558 01:24:52,151 --> 01:24:55,443 Frankly, your story is a complicated story, 1559 01:24:55,468 --> 01:24:59,225 and it will take some time for Mr. Lovascio 1560 01:24:59,261 --> 01:25:01,256 to try to convince the prosecutor. 1561 01:25:01,263 --> 01:25:03,353 - I'm just tired. 1562 01:25:03,374 --> 01:25:04,978 JUDGE: Okay. - I'm just tired. 1563 01:25:05,003 --> 01:25:06,742 JUDGE: I understand. - I'm ready to get it over with, 1564 01:25:06,767 --> 01:25:09,407 whatever it is. JUDGE: Okay. 1565 01:25:09,416 --> 01:25:11,865 - I'm still okay with pleading guilty. 1566 01:25:11,890 --> 01:25:13,396 JUDGE: Okay. 1567 01:25:14,347 --> 01:25:17,072 [ somber music plays ] 1568 01:25:17,097 --> 01:25:18,420 ♪♪ 1569 01:25:18,445 --> 01:25:21,156 - Three years, four years, it doesn't matter to me. 1570 01:25:22,024 --> 01:25:24,582 Not like it's changing a significant amount. 1571 01:25:26,227 --> 01:25:27,916 I just feel bad for my family. 1572 01:25:27,941 --> 01:25:30,157 Like, they're sitting there, like... 1573 01:25:30,182 --> 01:25:32,420 Do you know what I mean? To them, it seems like a lot. 1574 01:25:32,445 --> 01:25:36,006 Just ready to go, move on, let it go. 1575 01:25:36,031 --> 01:25:38,709 It happened. 1576 01:25:38,737 --> 01:25:40,280 JUDGE: Sit down. 1577 01:25:40,305 --> 01:25:43,717 On April 13, 2017, in Lewiston, 1578 01:25:43,742 --> 01:25:46,264 that you did intentionally and knowingly traffic 1579 01:25:46,289 --> 01:25:48,709 in what you knew and believed to be a scheduled drug, 1580 01:25:48,734 --> 01:25:50,361 which was, in fact, heroin. 1581 01:25:50,386 --> 01:25:51,697 LAWYER: I think it's a matter 1582 01:25:51,722 --> 01:25:54,799 of getting out of jail and over to the prison 1583 01:25:54,824 --> 01:25:58,397 where she feels she has a chance to see her mother. 1584 01:25:59,446 --> 01:26:01,453 JUDGE: So, ma'am, do you understand that charge? 1585 01:26:01,494 --> 01:26:02,889 - I do. JUDGE: And how do you plea? 1586 01:26:02,913 --> 01:26:05,042 - Guilty. 1587 01:26:08,956 --> 01:26:14,670 ♪♪ 1588 01:26:14,695 --> 01:26:20,701 ♪♪ 1589 01:26:20,742 --> 01:26:24,722 ♪♪ 1590 01:26:24,971 --> 01:26:27,312 I'd rather be inside than... 1591 01:26:27,432 --> 01:26:29,898 using and outside. 1592 01:26:35,040 --> 01:26:36,720 Yep. 1593 01:26:38,323 --> 01:26:40,346 If God gave me the choice, 1594 01:26:40,785 --> 01:26:42,370 "Jacinta, you could do 10 years in prison, 1595 01:26:42,395 --> 01:26:44,009 or you could do 10 years as an addict," 1596 01:26:44,034 --> 01:26:45,892 I'd do 10 years in prison. 1597 01:26:47,665 --> 01:26:50,611 In the back of my mind, I'm always in prison anyway. 1598 01:26:52,281 --> 01:26:54,659 Doesn't matter. 1599 01:27:01,274 --> 01:27:02,986 [ sighs ] 1600 01:27:04,008 --> 01:27:05,633 [ click ] 1601 01:27:05,689 --> 01:27:07,270 - You can hear the little click. 1602 01:27:07,295 --> 01:27:08,547 - Hi! 1603 01:27:08,572 --> 01:27:09,830 - Hey, chubby. 1604 01:27:09,855 --> 01:27:10,932 - I know! 1605 01:27:12,535 --> 01:27:14,079 - How you doing? - You look good. 1606 01:27:14,104 --> 01:27:15,814 - I do? - You look good. 1607 01:27:15,839 --> 01:27:17,252 Yeah. - I look chubby. 1608 01:27:17,277 --> 01:27:19,867 - Yeah, yeah. - Oh, well. 1609 01:27:19,892 --> 01:27:22,004 - I'd rather see you that way than skinny. 1610 01:27:22,028 --> 01:27:23,031 - I know. 1611 01:27:23,382 --> 01:27:24,860 - Why didn't I bring my glasses in? 1612 01:27:24,885 --> 01:27:26,065 - Did you want me to read it to you? 1613 01:27:26,090 --> 01:27:27,871 - Yeah. - Okay. 1614 01:27:28,111 --> 01:27:31,847 It says, "Hi, Mommy. I miss you so, so much. 1615 01:27:31,896 --> 01:27:34,097 I just want to say, no matter what happens, 1616 01:27:34,122 --> 01:27:36,965 I am always gonna love you, even if you're three hours away, 1617 01:27:36,990 --> 01:27:38,918 and I know you probably want me to say stuff, 1618 01:27:38,943 --> 01:27:42,340 but instead, I want to write you a song that reminds me of you. 1619 01:27:42,365 --> 01:27:44,117 If I'm the sun, you're the moon. 1620 01:27:44,142 --> 01:27:46,355 If I'm the words, then you're the tune. 1621 01:27:46,380 --> 01:27:48,438 There are times my world is crumbling 1622 01:27:48,463 --> 01:27:50,051 and the rain is crashing down, 1623 01:27:50,076 --> 01:27:51,965 but everywhere you are, the sun comes up. 1624 01:27:51,990 --> 01:27:53,894 Even when you're gone, I feel you close. 1625 01:27:53,919 --> 01:27:56,719 You'll always be the one I love the most. 1626 01:27:56,744 --> 01:27:59,798 P.S., don't forget to blow me a kiss to the stars, mwah." 1627 01:27:59,892 --> 01:28:03,353 - Aww, that's beautiful. - Look at how much I've read it. 1628 01:28:03,378 --> 01:28:05,338 Like, you can literally see through -- 1629 01:28:05,363 --> 01:28:06,864 -[ laughs ] 1630 01:28:06,889 --> 01:28:08,794 -It's ripping, but... 1631 01:28:09,117 --> 01:28:11,124 I keep it in my pocket every day. 1632 01:28:11,131 --> 01:28:12,674 - Really? - Yeah. 1633 01:28:12,699 --> 01:28:14,826 - [ chuckles ] - Every day. 1634 01:28:23,074 --> 01:28:26,927 So, in the beginning, I had nothing better to do 1635 01:28:26,952 --> 01:28:28,755 than to let you film me. 1636 01:28:28,780 --> 01:28:32,075 And then when I got out, 1637 01:28:32,100 --> 01:28:34,716 I convinced myself that I could -- 1638 01:28:34,741 --> 01:28:36,660 this could be a documentary 1639 01:28:36,685 --> 01:28:39,693 about a success story. 1640 01:28:40,210 --> 01:28:44,498 Then when I started using, I figured this is part of it. 1641 01:28:44,523 --> 01:28:46,400 Like, this is part of recovery. 1642 01:28:46,425 --> 01:28:47,990 Like, it doesn't have to end here. 1643 01:28:48,015 --> 01:28:49,881 Like, I wasn't gonna give up. 1644 01:28:49,906 --> 01:28:52,178 And being back now, 1645 01:28:52,383 --> 01:28:54,647 it's a little depressing. [ chuckles ] 1646 01:28:54,672 --> 01:28:57,717 That doesn't have to be where it ends. 1647 01:29:05,816 --> 01:29:08,690 [ indistinct conversations ] 1648 01:29:12,221 --> 01:29:15,880 I've been here 13 months clean. 1649 01:29:15,905 --> 01:29:19,200 I'm stronger. I'm healthier. 1650 01:29:19,225 --> 01:29:21,825 But I'm not done. 1651 01:29:21,850 --> 01:29:24,146 I could not get out today and go back to Lewiston. 1652 01:29:28,269 --> 01:29:31,214 I know that my addiction 1653 01:29:31,241 --> 01:29:34,708 is way stronger than I am. 1654 01:29:34,725 --> 01:29:36,393 My soul is still alive, 1655 01:29:36,418 --> 01:29:39,536 and my willpower is strong. 1656 01:29:41,201 --> 01:29:43,942 I just want this to be the last time. 1657 01:29:55,867 --> 01:29:58,903 I feel like this place has brainwashed me 1658 01:29:58,928 --> 01:30:02,278 into feeling like my mom and I are unhealthy. 1659 01:30:03,530 --> 01:30:05,573 When I got here, 1660 01:30:05,598 --> 01:30:07,754 they wouldn't let us be housed together. 1661 01:30:07,779 --> 01:30:10,801 We didn't see each other. 1662 01:30:10,826 --> 01:30:12,620 EARNSHAW: You said something about feeling 1663 01:30:12,636 --> 01:30:14,463 like you were chasing your mom through the system? 1664 01:30:14,488 --> 01:30:17,315 - It's kind of like... 1665 01:30:17,340 --> 01:30:20,542 taking the first... 1666 01:30:20,567 --> 01:30:22,714 sentence they give you, 1667 01:30:22,751 --> 01:30:25,300 thinking you're gonna see your mom. 1668 01:30:25,357 --> 01:30:28,074 And then you get here, 1669 01:30:28,104 --> 01:30:30,781 and they ship her out -- 1670 01:30:30,800 --> 01:30:33,183 the next day. 1671 01:30:46,608 --> 01:30:49,283 [ TV plays indistinctly ] 1672 01:30:49,319 --> 01:30:53,745 - High-risk factors that lead to offense -- 1673 01:30:53,765 --> 01:30:56,475 hanging around some family members, 1674 01:30:56,500 --> 01:30:59,451 stop working my program, unhealthy situation, 1675 01:30:59,476 --> 01:31:01,662 going to the mall with intents to steal. 1676 01:31:02,462 --> 01:31:05,060 Those are all just different things... 1677 01:31:07,368 --> 01:31:09,795 ...that would lead me up to relapsing. 1678 01:31:10,819 --> 01:31:13,693 I had to make that before I left the prison. 1679 01:31:27,380 --> 01:31:29,452 Had you ever done a crime like that? 1680 01:31:29,489 --> 01:31:30,552 Stolen from drug dealers? 1681 01:31:30,577 --> 01:31:32,659 - Oh, hell yeah. 1682 01:31:33,759 --> 01:31:35,428 If I was out when she did that, 1683 01:31:35,453 --> 01:31:37,611 I would've been with her. 1684 01:31:37,800 --> 01:31:39,204 100%. 1685 01:31:39,229 --> 01:31:41,134 I'd have been doing time with her right now. 1686 01:31:42,048 --> 01:31:44,681 Don't get me wrong. It don't make me feel good. 1687 01:31:44,706 --> 01:31:47,806 I just know where... 1688 01:31:47,831 --> 01:31:50,209 where we stand together. 1689 01:31:58,547 --> 01:32:00,591 We have such a bond 1690 01:32:00,616 --> 01:32:02,633 that it's unhealthy. 1691 01:32:02,861 --> 01:32:04,285 It really was, 1692 01:32:04,310 --> 01:32:06,977 and it really still is. 1693 01:32:07,087 --> 01:32:09,578 When I got the news my daughter was coming to the prison, 1694 01:32:09,603 --> 01:32:12,398 she's supposed to come up to the women's center 1695 01:32:12,423 --> 01:32:14,602 where I was at, 1696 01:32:14,627 --> 01:32:16,780 but they kept me and Jacinta apart. 1697 01:32:16,885 --> 01:32:19,722 Are you gonna try to separate a mother and a daughter? 1698 01:32:19,747 --> 01:32:21,421 Are you serious? 1699 01:32:21,453 --> 01:32:23,335 Christ, she was at the top of the hill, 1700 01:32:23,360 --> 01:32:25,492 and I'm at the bottom of the hill of the prison. 1701 01:32:25,647 --> 01:32:27,357 I'm yelling up to her. 1702 01:32:28,090 --> 01:32:29,610 What are you saying 1703 01:32:30,529 --> 01:32:32,207 - I love you. 1704 01:32:32,232 --> 01:32:34,208 That was enough to let her know 1705 01:32:34,257 --> 01:32:36,114 I'm still thinking about her, and she'd yell down to me. 1706 01:32:36,134 --> 01:32:37,891 We get caught, it's a write-up, class A write-up -- 1707 01:32:37,934 --> 01:32:41,004 communication between another inmate. 1708 01:32:41,029 --> 01:32:43,043 But how do we do it healthy? 1709 01:32:43,068 --> 01:32:45,480 'Cause I'm not gonna give up on my daughter. 1710 01:32:46,527 --> 01:32:47,785 Mark my words. 1711 01:32:47,810 --> 01:32:49,816 Three years -- that's when Jacinta is out. 1712 01:32:49,841 --> 01:32:52,302 You think she ain't gonna come running to me? 1713 01:32:54,529 --> 01:32:58,324 [ sentimental music plays ] 1714 01:32:58,349 --> 01:33:01,347 ♪♪ 1715 01:33:01,372 --> 01:33:05,533 ♪♪ 1716 01:33:05,558 --> 01:33:07,879 ♪♪ 1717 01:33:07,904 --> 01:33:09,925 TODD: At the end of the day, it's not my mom's fault, 1718 01:33:09,950 --> 01:33:12,457 you know, how we turned out. 1719 01:33:13,353 --> 01:33:15,235 I think my mom is confused. 1720 01:33:15,243 --> 01:33:17,894 I mean, I don't doubt that she loves us, no. 1721 01:33:17,919 --> 01:33:21,183 But I think what she knows of love 1722 01:33:21,208 --> 01:33:24,128 and what love really is -- 1723 01:33:24,153 --> 01:33:26,019 two different things. 1724 01:33:26,755 --> 01:33:29,507 I was loving people the way that she loved me, 1725 01:33:29,532 --> 01:33:32,419 giving them drugs or going out stealing with them 1726 01:33:32,482 --> 01:33:35,240 and getting them nice clothes or nice things. 1727 01:33:35,265 --> 01:33:37,648 That's the love that I got from my mother, and... 1728 01:33:37,695 --> 01:33:40,537 that's when I realized that she loved us, 1729 01:33:40,568 --> 01:33:42,738 but in the wrong ways. 1730 01:33:42,763 --> 01:33:45,566 Love is when you... 1731 01:33:45,591 --> 01:33:49,394 love someone enough to make changes for them. 1732 01:33:50,979 --> 01:33:56,943 ♪♪ 1733 01:33:56,968 --> 01:34:02,682 ♪♪ 1734 01:34:02,707 --> 01:34:09,056 ♪♪ 1735 01:34:09,075 --> 01:34:11,674 CAYLYNN: She's my mom, and I want to believe 1736 01:34:11,699 --> 01:34:14,299 that she's gonna get better. 1737 01:34:14,324 --> 01:34:16,940 But she has a problem, 1738 01:34:17,485 --> 01:34:21,036 and it's gonna take more than prison to get over it. 1739 01:34:27,006 --> 01:34:29,338 OPERATOR: You are receiving a call from... 1740 01:34:29,377 --> 01:34:30,849 - Jacinta. 1741 01:34:30,874 --> 01:34:32,506 OPERATOR: An inmate in... 1742 01:34:32,512 --> 01:34:34,307 OPERATOR 1743 01:34:34,424 --> 01:34:35,424 Hello 1744 01:34:35,483 --> 01:34:36,483 Hi baby! 1745 01:34:37,970 --> 01:34:39,546 CAYLYNN: Hi, Mom. 1746 01:34:39,572 --> 01:34:41,092 What are you doing? 1747 01:34:42,599 --> 01:34:43,639 Watching T.V. 1748 01:34:44,156 --> 01:34:45,156 Yeah? 1749 01:34:47,370 --> 01:34:49,050 Can I ask you a question? 1750 01:34:49,648 --> 01:34:51,328 Ask me anything you want. 1751 01:34:54,152 --> 01:34:58,215 So you had eleven years, doing what you want. 1752 01:34:59,217 --> 01:35:01,106 When you get out of there, 1753 01:35:02,343 --> 01:35:03,932 can it be my turn? 1754 01:35:05,286 --> 01:35:06,886 To have what I want? 1755 01:35:28,910 --> 01:35:31,662 [ police radio chatter ] 1756 01:35:32,914 --> 01:35:35,074 WOMAN: The form of research that's most commonly done 1757 01:35:35,099 --> 01:35:39,816 to understand this is called ethnomethodology. 1758 01:35:39,841 --> 01:35:43,738 Ethnomethodology is a way of studying the assumptions 1759 01:35:43,738 --> 01:35:47,910 people make about the behaviors that they engage in. 1760 01:35:48,051 --> 01:35:51,363 Who or what might be an agent of socialization? 1761 01:35:51,388 --> 01:35:53,848 Who taught you something 1762 01:35:53,873 --> 01:35:55,527 that you needed to know for later in life? 1763 01:35:55,552 --> 01:35:57,426 Your mother, our family, right? 1764 01:35:57,460 --> 01:36:00,761 Our family is a huge agent of socialization for us. 1765 01:36:00,790 --> 01:36:04,218 No, it's not, or whatever. Does that kind of make sense? 1766 01:36:04,243 --> 01:36:06,704 I know it's a little bit weird, but... 1767 01:36:06,729 --> 01:36:12,777 JACINTA: My mother is always gonna be amazing to me... 1768 01:36:13,649 --> 01:36:16,736 ...as sick as people see it to be. 1769 01:36:17,569 --> 01:36:19,732 I can accept my mother 1770 01:36:20,322 --> 01:36:22,759 and her addiction and her incarcerations, 1771 01:36:22,784 --> 01:36:24,595 her mistakes. 1772 01:36:25,618 --> 01:36:28,663 I just don't have to be involved. 1773 01:36:43,272 --> 01:36:45,711 It's been three years since I saw my daughter. 1774 01:36:45,736 --> 01:36:48,203 I can't believe three years has gone by. 1775 01:36:48,228 --> 01:36:50,606 [ indistinct conversations ] 1776 01:36:54,064 --> 01:36:57,109 ANNOUNCER: Jacinta Hunt. 1777 01:36:58,605 --> 01:37:01,525 [ indistinct conversations ] 1778 01:37:02,406 --> 01:37:06,227 - I remember when my mom was in jail... 1779 01:37:07,635 --> 01:37:08,829 she used to be like, 1780 01:37:08,865 --> 01:37:11,198 "I can't wait to smell your hair," and... 1781 01:37:12,326 --> 01:37:14,168 I used to think she was crazy. 1782 01:37:14,202 --> 01:37:15,912 [ voice breaking ] And... 1783 01:37:20,513 --> 01:37:22,224 ...that's exactly 1784 01:37:22,259 --> 01:37:25,053 the things I think about. 1785 01:37:27,060 --> 01:37:30,013 And I think all the time 1786 01:37:30,470 --> 01:37:31,727 about the day that she left, 1787 01:37:31,764 --> 01:37:32,966 and I just kept telling her like, 1788 01:37:32,972 --> 01:37:34,313 "Caylynn, I'll always come back for you. 1789 01:37:34,349 --> 01:37:35,935 I promise, I'll always come back for you." 1790 01:37:35,983 --> 01:37:38,513 And it's, like... 1791 01:37:40,104 --> 01:37:43,155 the one promise I should've kept good on. 1792 01:37:46,757 --> 01:37:49,061 I guess it's not necessarily too late, 1793 01:37:49,086 --> 01:37:51,005 but it kind of is. 1794 01:37:56,174 --> 01:37:59,045 CAYLYNN: My mom has explained to me 1795 01:37:59,070 --> 01:38:01,482 when she first held me 1796 01:38:01,507 --> 01:38:04,599 the emotions that went through her. 1797 01:38:05,054 --> 01:38:06,748 Giving me up, 1798 01:38:06,773 --> 01:38:09,263 she probably felt like... 1799 01:38:09,759 --> 01:38:11,934 she knew that she wasn't ready. 1800 01:38:13,067 --> 01:38:15,341 So she needed to let go, 1801 01:38:15,782 --> 01:38:19,037 and it must have been hard, but... 1802 01:38:19,445 --> 01:38:21,279 it was selfless, 1803 01:38:21,458 --> 01:38:23,107 but it was also selfish because she let go 1804 01:38:23,147 --> 01:38:26,406 because she knew she couldn't stop. 1805 01:38:28,569 --> 01:38:31,326 Her not being able to stop, for me, was selfish, 1806 01:38:31,637 --> 01:38:33,379 but what was selfless was knowing 1807 01:38:33,404 --> 01:38:35,918 that I'd be safe somewhere else. 1808 01:38:36,099 --> 01:38:38,754 And I am, so... 1809 01:38:38,779 --> 01:38:40,699 [ sniffles ] 1810 01:38:40,888 --> 01:38:42,746 Yeah. 1811 01:38:46,982 --> 01:38:48,941 - This is her first furlough. 1812 01:38:48,966 --> 01:38:51,779 First time of the times, she's been in prison 1813 01:38:51,801 --> 01:38:54,601 ever her having a furlough. 1814 01:38:54,630 --> 01:38:57,668 If she decides to take off, I got my taser. 1815 01:38:57,693 --> 01:38:59,004 Brrrr! 1816 01:38:59,029 --> 01:39:01,496 Taser her. [ chuckles ] 1817 01:39:02,216 --> 01:39:04,433 - Hi, Daddy. 1818 01:39:05,857 --> 01:39:07,573 - Boy, you ready? - Yeah, I am ready. 1819 01:39:07,614 --> 01:39:08,948 - I'm not going. 1820 01:39:08,973 --> 01:39:10,481 [ laughter ] 1821 01:39:10,868 --> 01:39:13,465 And we'll see you back here at... 1822 01:39:13,579 --> 01:39:14,585 - 5:00. - Five o'clock. 1823 01:39:15,587 --> 01:39:17,187 [ sentimental music plays ] 1824 01:39:17,212 --> 01:39:19,923 ♪♪ 1825 01:39:19,948 --> 01:39:21,107 Ehhh! [ chuckles ] 1826 01:39:21,122 --> 01:39:22,537 I'm so excited! 1827 01:39:22,562 --> 01:39:24,193 Come on! 1828 01:39:24,208 --> 01:39:27,384 [ chuckles ] 1829 01:39:27,422 --> 01:39:29,709 Ahh, I can't wait! 1830 01:39:36,268 --> 01:39:37,420 CAYLYNN: Do I know you? 1831 01:39:37,430 --> 01:39:39,810 [ laughs ] 1832 01:39:39,849 --> 01:39:43,317 Come here! 1833 01:39:43,335 --> 01:39:45,763 Oh, my God! 1834 01:39:45,788 --> 01:39:47,764 I missed you! - I stopped eating my -- 1835 01:39:47,773 --> 01:39:49,820 I stopped eating my fries for you. 1836 01:39:49,845 --> 01:39:52,711 - No, you didn't. You would've come in if you did. 1837 01:39:52,755 --> 01:39:55,479 Look at you! [ both laugh ] 1838 01:39:55,531 --> 01:39:59,082 I love you so much! 1839 01:39:59,116 --> 01:40:01,284 I love you. 1840 01:40:02,122 --> 01:40:06,808 - [ sobbing ] You can't cry 'cause then I'll cry. 1841 01:40:07,707 --> 01:40:10,209 - You're so beautiful! 1842 01:40:10,234 --> 01:40:14,380 ♪♪ 1843 01:40:14,405 --> 01:40:17,271 ♪♪ 1844 01:40:17,296 --> 01:40:19,242 I'm sorry it's been so long. 1845 01:40:19,263 --> 01:40:21,438 - It's okay. 1846 01:40:21,461 --> 01:40:26,122 ♪♪ 1847 01:40:26,147 --> 01:40:28,858 - I can't believe it's real. 1848 01:40:28,883 --> 01:40:35,056 ♪♪ 1849 01:40:35,081 --> 01:40:41,295 ♪♪ 1850 01:40:41,320 --> 01:40:47,492 ♪♪ 1851 01:40:47,517 --> 01:40:51,406 ♪♪ 1852 01:40:51,431 --> 01:40:53,683 ♪♪ 1853 01:40:53,694 --> 01:40:55,812 I didn't send Caylynn with Wanda 1854 01:40:55,848 --> 01:40:58,315 because I didn't love her. 1855 01:40:58,344 --> 01:40:59,953 ♪♪ 1856 01:40:59,978 --> 01:41:02,750 I sent Caylynn with Wanda because I did. 1857 01:41:02,775 --> 01:41:06,719 ♪♪ 1858 01:41:06,744 --> 01:41:08,914 Contrary to popular belief, 1859 01:41:08,939 --> 01:41:11,820 it takes a good mother to know 1860 01:41:11,845 --> 01:41:14,283 when they can't do what's right. 1861 01:41:14,308 --> 01:41:18,077 ♪♪ 1862 01:41:18,113 --> 01:41:20,049 ♪♪ 1863 01:41:20,074 --> 01:41:24,376 [ radio plays indistinctly ] 1864 01:41:24,394 --> 01:41:27,753 ♪♪ 1865 01:41:27,778 --> 01:41:32,337 ♪♪ 1866 01:41:32,362 --> 01:41:34,181 [ chuckles ] 1867 01:41:34,206 --> 01:41:36,517 [ laughs ] 1868 01:41:36,542 --> 01:41:40,157 Just like that. 1869 01:41:40,182 --> 01:41:47,273 ♪♪ 1870 01:41:47,298 --> 01:41:54,138 ♪♪ 1871 01:41:54,163 --> 01:42:01,253 ♪♪ 1872 01:42:01,278 --> 01:42:08,368 ♪♪ 1873 01:42:08,393 --> 01:42:15,233 ♪♪ 1874 01:42:15,258 --> 01:42:22,265 ♪♪ 1875 01:42:22,290 --> 01:42:29,380 ♪♪ 1876 01:42:29,405 --> 01:42:36,246 ♪♪ 1877 01:42:36,271 --> 01:42:43,361 ♪♪ 1878 01:42:43,386 --> 01:42:50,518 ♪♪ 1879 01:42:50,543 --> 01:42:57,383 ♪♪ 1880 01:42:57,408 --> 01:43:04,498 ♪♪ 1881 01:43:04,523 --> 01:43:11,613 ♪♪ 1882 01:43:11,638 --> 01:43:18,478 ♪♪ 1883 01:43:18,503 --> 01:43:25,594 ♪♪ 1884 01:43:25,619 --> 01:43:32,626 ♪♪ 1885 01:43:32,651 --> 01:43:39,492 ♪♪ 1886 01:43:39,517 --> 01:43:46,607 ♪♪ 1887 01:43:46,632 --> 01:43:53,722 ♪♪ 1888 01:43:53,747 --> 01:44:00,587 ♪♪ 1889 01:44:00,612 --> 01:44:07,703 ♪♪ 1890 01:44:07,728 --> 01:44:14,818 ♪♪ 1891 01:44:14,843 --> 01:44:21,683 ♪♪ 1892 01:44:21,708 --> 01:44:28,799 ♪♪ 1893 01:44:28,824 --> 01:44:35,915 ♪♪ 1894 01:44:35,940 --> 01:44:42,780 ♪♪ 1895 01:44:42,805 --> 01:44:49,812 ♪♪ 1896 01:44:49,837 --> 01:44:56,928 ♪♪ 1897 01:44:56,953 --> 01:45:03,835 ♪♪ 1898 01:45:03,860 --> 01:45:10,951 ♪♪ 1899 01:45:10,976 --> 01:45:16,850 ♪♪ 1900 01:45:23,799 --> 01:45:30,639 ♪♪ 1901 01:45:30,723 --> 01:45:37,813 ♪♪ 1902 01:45:37,896 --> 01:45:44,987 ♪♪ 1903 01:45:45,070 --> 01:45:51,910 ♪♪ 1904 01:45:51,994 --> 01:45:59,084 ♪♪ 1905 01:45:59,168 --> 01:46:06,175 ♪♪ 1906 01:46:06,258 --> 01:46:13,182 ♪♪