1
00:00:18,102 --> 00:00:19,769
I love sex!

2
00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,771
It's just one of the
truly great ideas.

3
00:00:21,772 --> 00:00:23,356
I mean, just the fact

4
00:00:23,357 --> 00:00:26,568
that our bodies have this
built-in capacity for joy,

5
00:00:26,569 --> 00:00:28,904
oh, just, it makes me love God.

6
00:00:28,905 --> 00:00:30,197
Yes!

7
00:00:47,423 --> 00:00:48,382
Sorry.

8
00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:49,217
What?

9
00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:50,051
It broke.

10
00:00:50,051 --> 00:00:51,051
It broke?

11
00:00:51,969 --> 00:00:52,803
Don't worry.

12
00:00:52,804 --> 00:00:54,387
It broke?

13
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:55,431
It's okay.

14
00:00:56,641 --> 00:00:57,849
- It broke?!

15
00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:14,658
- Let's just cuddle.

16
00:01:14,659 --> 00:01:15,493
Cuddle?

17
00:01:15,494 --> 00:01:18,119
- Like little bunnies
or little babies.

18
00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:20,330
It'<i>s so</i> much better.

19
00:01:20,331 --> 00:01:21,706
Safer.

20
00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:23,291
- Than what?

21
00:01:23,292 --> 00:01:24,709
- Than sex.

22
00:01:24,710 --> 00:01:25,961
- That's my latest medical test.

23
00:01:25,962 --> 00:01:26,796
- Mm-hm.

24
00:01:26,797 --> 00:01:29,381
. The results of my blood
test from a month ago.

25
00:01:29,382 --> 00:01:30,590
- A month ago?

26
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:31,467
- Last week.

27
00:01:31,468 --> 00:01:32,759
- Last week?

28
00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:34,135
- This afternoon.

29
00:01:34,136 --> 00:01:36,263
- I'm also gonna need to
know the name of your internist,

30
00:01:36,264 --> 00:01:38,390
your most recent
X-rays, your passport,

31
00:01:38,391 --> 00:01:40,684
and a list of your
previous sexual contacts.

32
00:01:40,685 --> 00:01:43,812
- But isn't that
a little extreme?

33
00:01:43,813 --> 00:01:45,189
- Do you want the apartment?

34
00:02:10,256 --> 00:02:11,256
- No!

35
00:02:18,681 --> 00:02:19,806
No, I can't take it.

36
00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:21,182
It's insane.

37
00:02:21,183 --> 00:02:22,350
Enough.

38
00:02:22,351 --> 00:02:26,605
Sex is too sacred to
be treated this way.

39
00:02:26,606 --> 00:02:31,319
<i>Sex was</i> never meant to
be safe or negotiated or fatal.

40
00:02:33,321 --> 00:02:34,321
So I really did it.

41
00:02:36,532 --> 00:02:37,532
This guy...

42
00:02:38,284 --> 00:02:41,120
I'm in bed with him,
and he starts crying.

43
00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:43,914
So he says...

44
00:02:47,043 --> 00:02:48,043
- I'm sorry.

45
00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:50,129
It's just...

46
00:02:53,299 --> 00:02:55,051
This used to be so much fun.

47
00:02:58,346 --> 00:03:00,181
- <i>So,</i> no sex.

48
00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:02,682
Not for me.

49
00:03:03,476 --> 00:03:04,352
Done.

50
00:03:04,353 --> 00:03:07,145
- Excuse me,
where's Third Avenue?

51
00:03:09,732 --> 00:03:10,857
- It's right over there.

52
00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:11,941
- Thanks a lot.

53
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:13,610
- Sure, any time.

54
00:03:13,611 --> 00:03:14,654
Don't mention it.

55
00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:16,571
Welcome.

56
00:03:17,740 --> 00:03:19,157
Welcome.

57
00:03:19,158 --> 00:03:20,158
And you know what?

58
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:23,036
Oh.

59
00:03:23,037 --> 00:03:24,537
It's gonna be fine.

60
00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:27,207
Because I am a
naturally cheerful person

61
00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:30,502
and I will find a
substitute for sex.

62
00:03:30,503 --> 00:03:34,965
Sex Light, Sex Helper, I
Can't Believe It's Not Sex!

63
00:03:36,217 --> 00:03:38,885
I'll find a great new way to
live, and a way to be happy.

64
00:03:38,886 --> 00:03:42,263
So no sex.

65
00:03:42,264 --> 00:03:44,057
No sex!

66
00:03:44,058 --> 00:03:48,436
I'm ready, I'm
willing, let's go.

67
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:02,534
That's the answer.

68
00:04:02,535 --> 00:04:06,037
I'll just pour all my physical
needs into working out.

69
00:04:06,038 --> 00:04:08,457
No sex, just sweat.

70
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:12,419
Can I get a spot?

71
00:04:33,441 --> 00:04:34,441
- You got it.

72
00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:38,070
How much do you want...

73
00:04:39,155 --> 00:04:40,155
On?

74
00:04:42,658 --> 00:04:43,658
- 45s.

75
00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:46,661
- I just joined.

76
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:50,457
You like it here?

77
00:04:51,417 --> 00:04:52,417
- Yeah, a lot.

78
00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:55,003
Yeah.

79
00:04:57,339 --> 00:04:58,339
- Steve.

80
00:04:59,300 --> 00:05:00,550
- Jeffrey.

81
00:05:01,385 --> 00:05:02,385
Jeff.

82
00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:05,680
- You okay?

83
00:05:05,681 --> 00:05:06,515
- Yeah.

84
00:05:06,515 --> 00:05:07,515
Sure.

85
00:05:11,479 --> 00:05:13,104
Oh.

86
00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:20,821
- <i>So,</i> do you want to...

87
00:05:23,991 --> 00:05:24,991
Do your set?

88
00:05:26,952 --> 00:05:28,119
- Oh, yeah.

89
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:29,120
Sure.

90
00:05:35,711 --> 00:05:36,711
- Ready?

91
00:05:37,421 --> 00:05:38,671
- Oh, yeah.

92
00:05:43,969 --> 00:05:48,098
- One, two, that's
right, three, four.

93
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:51,100
You love it.

94
00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:52,061
Come on, come on.

95
00:05:52,061 --> 00:05:53,061
Five.

96
00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:56,190
Six.

97
00:05:58,192 --> 00:05:59,734
One more, come on.

98
00:05:59,735 --> 00:06:00,569
Get ready.

99
00:06:00,570 --> 00:06:02,695
I'm with you, don't stop.

100
00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:05,198
Push it, push it, you
want it, you need it.

101
00:06:05,199 --> 00:06:08,451
Come on, give me everything,
every ounce, every drop.

102
00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:10,662
Pump it, pump it, baby.

103
00:06:10,663 --> 00:06:12,288
Oh, my God, you are too much.

104
00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:14,999
You are the best, you are
the most, you are the king.

105
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,669
You're there, you're doing it.

106
00:06:18,504 --> 00:06:19,338
Come to papa.

107
00:06:19,339 --> 00:06:20,339
You're on it.

108
00:06:20,339 --> 00:06:21,339
Go, <i>go,</i> go.

109
00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:30,598
Great set.

110
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,810
- You, too, I mean...

111
00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:35,937
Thanks for the spot.

112
00:06:35,938 --> 00:06:37,105
- Any time.

113
00:06:37,106 --> 00:06:40,317
You look, oof, great!

114
00:06:41,694 --> 00:06:42,694
- Thanks.

115
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:45,406
- You look terrific.

116
00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:47,782
- Jeffrey

117
00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:49,659
Jeff.

118
00:06:50,578 --> 00:06:51,537
- Yeah?

119
00:06:51,538 --> 00:06:55,916
- What would happen if
I kissed you, right now?

120
00:06:59,962 --> 00:07:00,962
- What?

121
00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:04,966
- You want to?

122
00:07:06,677 --> 00:07:08,012
- Uh, I have to...

123
00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:10,471
The water fountain.

124
00:07:10,472 --> 00:07:11,307
Chicken shit!

125
00:07:11,308 --> 00:07:13,474
- I am not, I'm
dehydrated, I need carbs.

126
00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:14,851
- Get ready.
- No, I need

127
00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:15,769
to work on my abs.

128
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:16,729
I need a protein shake.

129
00:07:16,730 --> 00:07:18,771
Do you like amino acids?
- You bet.

130
00:07:25,821 --> 00:07:27,572
- Oh, man!
- Gross!

131
00:07:27,573 --> 00:07:29,657
That's disgusting.
- I'm gonna puke.

132
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:31,784
Aw!

133
00:07:39,627 --> 00:07:40,877
- No.

134
00:07:58,312 --> 00:07:59,312
Oh, Jesus!

135
00:08:10,199 --> 00:08:11,449
Thank you.

136
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,505
- You saw Mother Teresa?

137
00:08:25,506 --> 00:08:26,882
- I swear, she helped me up.

138
00:08:27,883 --> 00:08:29,801
- But how did she look?

139
00:08:29,802 --> 00:08:30,678
- Oh, I don't know.

140
00:08:30,679 --> 00:08:32,053
She was walking.

141
00:08:32,054 --> 00:08:32,888
She looked great.

142
00:08:32,889 --> 00:08:34,640
- Oh, please, she's
had work done.

143
00:08:40,771 --> 00:08:41,855
Can I do this?

144
00:08:42,773 --> 00:08:45,025
Or do I look like some
sort of gay superhero?

145
00:08:46,902 --> 00:08:49,404
- Sterling, I think
I'm giving up sex.

146
00:08:49,405 --> 00:08:50,530
- You are?

147
00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:51,490
- Why?

148
00:08:51,491 --> 00:08:53,658
- Well, I just think it's time.

149
00:08:53,659 --> 00:08:54,951
I mean, I love sex so much,

150
00:08:54,952 --> 00:08:56,452
but everything has
gotten too scary.

151
00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:57,578
It's too overwhelming.

152
00:08:57,579 --> 00:09:00,289
- My dear, what you
need is a relationship.

153
00:09:00,290 --> 00:09:01,125
- A relationship?

154
00:09:01,126 --> 00:09:03,710
- Hm, and shoes.

155
00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:05,670
. If you had a boyfriend,
then you'd relax.

156
00:09:05,671 --> 00:09:08,589
You'd set the rules once,
then everything will be fine.

157
00:09:08,590 --> 00:09:10,675
That's what Darius and I did,
and we've been together now

158
00:09:10,676 --> 00:09:12,427
for almost two years.

159
00:09:12,428 --> 00:09:14,387
- Yes, but Darius is a dancer.

160
00:09:14,388 --> 00:09:15,763
He's in Cats.

161
00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:16,889
- Oh, my!

162
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:17,725
- Exactly.

163
00:09:17,726 --> 00:09:19,852
I said you needed a
boyfriend, not a person.

164
00:09:21,645 --> 00:09:24,063
I mean, I really do love Darius.

165
00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,398
I love his body.

166
00:09:25,399 --> 00:09:26,941
I love his smile.

167
00:09:26,942 --> 00:09:28,735
He has great hands and feet.

168
00:09:28,736 --> 00:09:31,904
I mean, on some dancers,
the toes are all smashed,

169
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,197
and I would just simply say:

170
00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:37,201
"Sorry, Misha,
not without socks."

171
00:09:37,202 --> 00:09:40,455
Oh, and Darius loves me.

172
00:09:40,456 --> 00:09:41,498
Lord knows why.

173
00:09:42,875 --> 00:09:43,709
- And how is Darius?

174
00:09:43,710 --> 00:09:45,293
Is he back in the show?

175
00:09:45,294 --> 00:09:47,796
- Of course, he's fine.

176
00:09:48,714 --> 00:09:50,798
It's just a reaction to the AZT.

177
00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:52,467
They adjusted the dose.

178
00:09:52,468 --> 00:09:53,968
He's great!

179
00:09:53,969 --> 00:09:54,969
- Of course.

180
00:10:00,142 --> 00:10:02,727
- You think I don't
know how I sound.

181
00:10:02,728 --> 00:10:04,103
Of course I know.

182
00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:06,439
But I have made a decision.

183
00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:08,691
I've always been
lucky, all my life.

184
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,026
Well, obviously.

185
00:10:10,027 --> 00:10:12,779
And I intend to stay lucky.

186
00:10:12,780 --> 00:10:13,780
<i>N'est-ce pas?</i>

187
00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:15,281
- And you still have sex?

188
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,033
- Of course.

189
00:10:17,034 --> 00:10:18,744
Safe sex, the best.

190
00:10:19,620 --> 00:10:20,745
Two cappuccinos.

191
00:10:20,746 --> 00:10:22,164
Thank you, darling, big kiss.

192
00:10:23,082 --> 00:10:24,999
The earring, fun.

193
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,250
Last year.

194
00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:29,337
I mean, Jeffrey, it's just sex.

195
00:10:29,338 --> 00:10:33,091
- Just sex?

196
00:10:40,182 --> 00:10:43,851
- Hi, I'm Skip Winkley, and
welcome to It's Just Sex.

197
00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:46,896
The show where we
explore human sexuality

198
00:10:46,897 --> 00:10:48,898
and win big prizes.

199
00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:53,694
And what a great group of
contestants we have today.

200
00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:55,154
- Three gay men.

201
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:55,989
- Hi, Skip.

202
00:10:55,990 --> 00:10:57,490
- Hey, Skip.

203
00:10:57,491 --> 00:10:58,491
- Bisexual.

204
00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:00,619
- Oh, me too.

205
00:11:00,620 --> 00:11:02,578
- Now it's time to
play It's Just Sex.

206
00:11:02,579 --> 00:11:05,456
Remember, each
question may have more

207
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:07,083
than one correct answer.

208
00:11:07,084 --> 00:11:09,502
The most stylish reply wins.

209
00:11:10,921 --> 00:11:11,963
Thank you, Cheryl.

210
00:11:11,964 --> 00:11:13,756
Isn't she lovely?

211
00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:14,966
Look who I'm asking.

212
00:11:16,468 --> 00:11:17,844
Question number one.

213
00:11:17,845 --> 00:11:21,889
What seemingly harmless
events can now be fatal

214
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:24,267
if they occur during sex?

215
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,521
- A paper cut.

216
00:11:28,522 --> 00:11:30,273
- Recent dental work.

217
00:11:30,274 --> 00:11:32,066
- Fluorescent lighting.

218
00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:33,609
- Correct, for 100 points!

219
00:11:34,987 --> 00:11:36,613
Question number two.

220
00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:42,118
Who is your favorite
sexual fantasy?

221
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:47,665
- Denzel Washington.

222
00:11:47,666 --> 00:11:49,167
- That guy at the gym.

223
00:11:49,168 --> 00:11:50,252
- Yoko Ono.

224
00:11:53,005 --> 00:11:54,714
To see the apartment.

225
00:11:54,715 --> 00:11:56,632
- Correct again, for 100 points!

226
00:11:57,594 --> 00:12:00,845
And now, our bonus round,
where everything can change.

227
00:12:00,846 --> 00:12:03,639
For 500 points.

228
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,684
Let's say there's a fellow
who just loves having sex

229
00:12:06,685 --> 00:12:07,811
more than anything.

230
00:12:08,979 --> 00:12:11,397
What will happen to him

231
00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:15,110
if he just flat out,
dag-nabbit, stops?

232
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:17,945
- Oh, my.

233
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:19,280
- Ooh.

234
00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:23,117
- Skip, my answer is this:

235
00:12:23,118 --> 00:12:24,952
if the fellow stops having sex

236
00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:27,663
he will pour himself
into his career

237
00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:29,790
and all that rechanneled energy

238
00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:32,084
will create incredible
career karma

239
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:35,214
and he'll be a huge success,
and fantastically happy.

240
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,217
- Absolutely right!

241
00:12:44,348 --> 00:12:46,891
Oh, my God!

242
00:12:46,892 --> 00:12:47,726
- Hold it.

243
00:12:47,727 --> 00:12:49,644
Hold it, the judges
have a question.

244
00:12:49,645 --> 00:12:53,064
Nothing really, just
a minor technicality.

245
00:12:53,065 --> 00:12:57,735
It is true that a soaring career
will compensate for no sex,

246
00:12:57,736 --> 00:13:00,864
but what exactly is your career?

247
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:04,034
- Well, I'm an actor...

248
00:13:04,243 --> 00:13:04,868
Waiter.

249
00:13:05,077 --> 00:13:05,786
- Which means...

250
00:13:05,994 --> 00:13:07,496
- I win!

251
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,341
- Okay, so I'm an
unemployed actor.

252
00:13:22,052 --> 00:13:23,594
But I'm talented.

253
00:13:23,595 --> 00:13:24,637
I think I am.

254
00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:26,682
Last week, I read for
a part on a TV show.

255
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:30,559
- Read page 33.

256
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:32,228
The show is Manhattan Precinct.

257
00:13:32,229 --> 00:13:35,189
The role is Police
Officer number two.

258
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:38,276
Now, remember,
there are no small parts.

259
00:13:38,277 --> 00:13:39,152
Ah!

260
00:13:39,153 --> 00:13:41,320
Actually, there are.

261
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:44,156
All right, you've just burst in

262
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:47,285
on the evil ghetto drug lord.

263
00:13:47,286 --> 00:13:48,286
- Okay.

264
00:13:49,079 --> 00:13:50,538
- You can go out and come in.

265
00:13:50,539 --> 00:13:51,539
Go.

266
00:13:56,211 --> 00:13:57,211
Action!

267
00:13:57,921 --> 00:13:59,672
- Hold it right there, Diego.

268
00:13:59,673 --> 00:14:00,715
Freeze.

269
00:14:00,716 --> 00:14:01,924
- You're a hero.

270
00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:03,926
You mean business.
- Yeah.

271
00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:05,261
- Go again.

272
00:14:05,262 --> 00:14:06,262
- Okay.

273
00:14:09,975 --> 00:14:11,309
Action!

274
00:14:11,310 --> 00:14:13,644
- Hold it right there, Diego.

275
00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:15,021
Freeze!

276
00:14:15,022 --> 00:14:16,480
- You loathe him.

277
00:14:16,481 --> 00:14:17,690
You scorn him.

278
00:14:17,691 --> 00:14:19,317
Make me feel it.

279
00:14:19,318 --> 00:14:20,401
It's more.

280
00:14:20,402 --> 00:14:21,236
Yeah.

281
00:14:21,237 --> 00:14:22,737
- It's prime time!

282
00:14:22,738 --> 00:14:24,363
Action!

283
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:25,198
- Huh!

284
00:14:25,199 --> 00:14:26,490
Hold it right there, Diego!

285
00:14:26,491 --> 00:14:28,534
Freeze!

286
00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:31,078
Hold it right there, Diego.

287
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,079
Freeze!

288
00:14:33,457 --> 00:14:35,667
Hold it right there, Diego!

289
00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:41,673
God, I just hate you!

290
00:14:46,219 --> 00:14:50,306
- Perhaps you'd like
to read for our gay role.

291
00:14:50,307 --> 00:14:51,307
Lance.

292
00:14:52,184 --> 00:14:53,352
The neighbor.

293
00:14:57,939 --> 00:15:00,524
- Which is why I am a waiter,

294
00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:03,612
a cater-waiter to be exact.

295
00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:06,238
I work at parties.

296
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:09,825
It's a lot of fun, actually,
because I get to go everywhere.

297
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:13,662
Private homes, tents
in Central Park, hotels.

298
00:15:13,663 --> 00:15:16,499
It's like gay National Guard.

299
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:17,500
Jeffrey!

300
00:15:20,462 --> 00:15:24,215
- For anyone at all, you've
ignored me, but I don't mind,

301
00:15:24,216 --> 00:15:27,177
because I've tried on your fur.

302
00:15:28,345 --> 00:15:30,179
- Good evening, everyone.

303
00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:34,308
I'm Ann Marwood-Bartle.

304
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:39,563
And I'd like to welcome you
all to country-western night

305
00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:43,442
here at the Essex House,
a hoedown for AIDS.

306
00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:52,493
The red ribbon I wear
stands for AIDS awareness.

307
00:15:52,494 --> 00:15:56,455
The lavender ribbon is in
memory of those who have died.

308
00:15:56,456 --> 00:16:00,209
The pink ribbon is
for breast cancer.

309
00:16:00,210 --> 00:16:01,544
And the...

310
00:16:01,545 --> 00:16:04,839
Oh, the diamond spray is
a gift of my first husband.

311
00:16:07,384 --> 00:16:10,386
Come on, everybody, chow down.

312
00:16:11,930 --> 00:16:13,210
Oh, look at me, I'm a cowperson.

313
00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:21,689
- Hey, I need an Absolut
and tonic, and two spritzers.

314
00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:30,781
Wow.

315
00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:32,659
- Boy, I was hoping
I'd run into you.

316
00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:36,580
I wanted to apologize about
the other day at the gym.

317
00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:38,706
I came on a little strong.

318
00:16:38,707 --> 00:16:40,583
- Oh, no, no, no,
no, you were great.

319
00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:43,044
I'm sorry I took off,
I was acting weird.

320
00:16:44,463 --> 00:16:45,921
I'm an actor.

321
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,631
- I thought <i>so.</i>

322
00:16:47,632 --> 00:16:49,133
Have I seen you in something?

323
00:16:49,134 --> 00:16:52,720
- Well, did you see Manhattan
Precinct two weeks ago?

324
00:16:52,721 --> 00:16:54,890
End of the show,
the gay neighbor?

325
00:16:57,434 --> 00:17:00,060
- Hold it right there, Diego.

326
00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:01,061
Freeze!

327
00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:05,691
- Oh, my God!

328
00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:06,692
Shoot him!

329
00:17:07,652 --> 00:17:09,320
- You were great!

330
00:17:11,907 --> 00:17:13,324
- Hao.

331
00:17:13,325 --> 00:17:14,325
- Why?

332
00:17:16,745 --> 00:17:19,914
- <i>So,</i> what do you really do?

333
00:17:19,915 --> 00:17:21,166
- Actually, really?
- Hm.

334
00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:23,418
- I'm a bartender.
- Oh.

335
00:17:24,336 --> 00:17:28,715
. I sort of acted and I sort
of wrote, but mostly, I...

336
00:17:31,009 --> 00:17:32,009
- You what?

337
00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:35,054
- Watch you.

338
00:17:37,807 --> 00:17:38,891
- You do?

339
00:17:38,892 --> 00:17:40,292
He does.

340
00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:43,896
- Spritzers, table 15.

341
00:17:43,897 --> 00:17:44,897
Roundup!

342
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:48,609
- Nice work, Little Feather.

343
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:49,444
Bitch.

344
00:17:49,445 --> 00:17:50,945
- Squaw.

345
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:54,698
- Now, is everyone
ready to kick up their heels

346
00:17:54,699 --> 00:17:58,702
and rustle their petticoats
for a new outpatient lounge?!

347
00:17:58,703 --> 00:17:59,703
Yeah!

348
00:18:01,540 --> 00:18:05,877
- Cowhands, cowgirls, I
give you a very special treat.

349
00:18:06,795 --> 00:18:09,547
They've been
practicing for weeks.

350
00:18:09,548 --> 00:18:14,469
Let's give a big whoop-dee-i-aye
to Dr. Sidney Greenblatt

351
00:18:14,928 --> 00:18:17,805
and his Mount Sinai Ramblers!

352
00:18:37,284 --> 00:18:39,535
♪ Swing your
partner, round you go ♪

353
00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:42,371
♪ Allemande left and do-si-do ♪

354
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:45,000
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

355
00:18:47,502 --> 00:18:48,336
- Do you have a lover?

356
00:18:48,337 --> 00:18:49,670
- No.

357
00:18:49,671 --> 00:18:51,839
- Are you seeing someone?
- No.

358
00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:52,674
- Do I care?

359
00:18:52,675 --> 00:18:55,092
- You are unbelievable.

360
00:18:55,093 --> 00:18:56,093
- Find out.

361
00:18:56,928 --> 00:18:58,345
Don't you love this part?

362
00:18:58,346 --> 00:18:59,513
- What part?

363
00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:01,640
. When you can't find out
enough about the other person.

364
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:05,561
When it's all interesting,
when it all seems sexy.

365
00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:08,022
First steps.
- Oh, you move fast.

366
00:19:08,023 --> 00:19:11,525
. Catch up, because if I
don't touch you very soon,

367
00:19:11,526 --> 00:19:13,320
I may explode.

368
00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:17,239
- Until about a minute ago, I
had a very good reason not

369
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:18,240
to go out with you.

370
00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:20,075
- Which was?

371
00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:22,286
Oh, wait, let me <i>guess,</i>

372
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:26,248
is it because I'm a
cowboy and you're a waiter?

373
00:19:26,249 --> 00:19:28,835
- We're a proud people.
- Yeah, what a shame.

374
00:19:30,211 --> 00:19:31,046
- You know, in a better world,

375
00:19:31,047 --> 00:19:33,005
I could ask you to square dance.

376
00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:34,548
- Really?

377
00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:36,467
Want to square dance?

378
00:19:36,468 --> 00:19:38,844
- Bow to your partners,
step once more!

379
00:19:40,138 --> 00:19:42,723
Cater-waiters, take the floor!

380
00:20:37,779 --> 00:20:38,697
- Wow!

381
00:20:58,466 --> 00:20:59,466
No!

382
00:21:01,803 --> 00:21:03,929
- Uh, uh, uh, uh,
you can't do that.

383
00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:05,097
This is my fantasy.

384
00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:07,266
- We're not allowed to
have fantasies, not anymore.

385
00:21:07,267 --> 00:21:08,559
- Come on, one more do-si-do.

386
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:11,937
- I can't, I can't explain
it, it's not you, it'<i>s...</i>

387
00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:13,522
Yes, it is you.

388
00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:14,357
- What?

389
00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:15,357
- I have to go.

390
00:21:36,129 --> 00:21:41,092
- Hi, I'm Sharon, and
I'm a sexual compulsive.

391
00:21:42,260 --> 00:21:44,052
Hi, Sharon.

392
00:21:44,053 --> 00:21:46,597
- Oh, that felt good.

393
00:21:46,598 --> 00:21:48,099
I feel like...

394
00:21:49,517 --> 00:21:50,643
I'm on my way.

395
00:21:52,020 --> 00:21:56,690
Admitting I have a problem
is the first step to healing.

396
00:21:58,693 --> 00:22:00,110
For the first time in my life,

397
00:22:00,111 --> 00:22:04,449
I feel like I don't need
a man to define myself.

398
00:22:06,868 --> 00:22:07,993
Hi, there.

399
00:22:12,665 --> 00:22:14,500
- <i>So,</i> he was really
cute, this bartender.

400
00:22:14,501 --> 00:22:16,126
- Oh, he was fantastic.

401
00:22:16,127 --> 00:22:17,711
- Why aren't you seeing him?

402
00:22:17,712 --> 00:22:18,796
- Oh, I don't know.

403
00:22:18,797 --> 00:22:20,088
I'm going nuts.

404
00:22:20,089 --> 00:22:21,965
. Jeffrey, you're beginning
to have a problem.

405
00:22:21,966 --> 00:22:23,050
Endive?

406
00:22:23,051 --> 00:22:25,135
- Hi, guys.
- Hello, sweetheart.

407
00:22:25,136 --> 00:22:26,678
- Oh, what a day.

408
00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:28,555
I am exhausted.

409
00:22:28,556 --> 00:22:30,599
- Darius, aren't you supposed
to leave your costume

410
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:31,559
at the theater?

411
00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:34,019
- We're filming the
commercial, the new one.

412
00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:36,188
It ran late, I got stuck.

413
00:22:36,189 --> 00:22:39,525
So you're not
having sex anymore.

414
00:22:39,526 --> 00:22:41,360
- What Jeffrey
needs is to fall in love

415
00:22:41,361 --> 00:22:42,653
and have a relationship.

416
00:22:42,654 --> 00:22:47,032
Then all this sex thing
will simply fall into place.

417
00:22:47,033 --> 00:22:48,367
- Exactly.

418
00:22:48,368 --> 00:22:49,744
I mean, look at us.

419
00:22:51,329 --> 00:22:52,704
Look at how happy we are.

420
00:22:52,705 --> 00:22:54,790
Don't we make you
wanna fall in love?

421
00:22:54,791 --> 00:22:57,125
- Sometimes, I think we
should be on a brochure

422
00:22:57,126 --> 00:22:58,210
for Middle America.

423
00:22:58,211 --> 00:23:03,048
Then everyone can say, "Oh,
look, a wholesome gay couple."

424
00:23:03,049 --> 00:23:04,716
Oh, excuse me.

425
00:23:04,717 --> 00:23:06,426
You two are not wholesome.

426
00:23:06,427 --> 00:23:08,387
You're a decorator.

427
00:23:08,388 --> 00:23:11,348
Excuse me, an interior
designer, and he's a dancer.

428
00:23:11,349 --> 00:23:14,142
You two are like Martha
Stewart and Ann Miller,

429
00:23:14,143 --> 00:23:15,727
which, believe me, I prefer.

430
00:23:15,728 --> 00:23:18,188
I just hate that gay role
models are supposed

431
00:23:18,189 --> 00:23:19,481
to be just like straight people.

432
00:23:19,482 --> 00:23:21,066
As if even straight
people are like that.

433
00:23:21,067 --> 00:23:23,610
- That is so true.

434
00:23:23,611 --> 00:23:26,280
I was watching these
two guys on Nightline

435
00:23:26,281 --> 00:23:28,658
on Gay Pride Day,
and one of them said,

436
00:23:29,701 --> 00:23:33,120
"Hi, I'm Bob Wheeler
and I'm an attorney,

437
00:23:33,121 --> 00:23:34,788
"and my lover, he's a surgeon.

438
00:23:34,789 --> 00:23:35,914
"And we would like
to show America"

439
00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:40,085
"that all gays are not
limp-wristed, screaming queens."

440
00:23:40,086 --> 00:23:41,837
"There are gay truck drivers"

441
00:23:41,838 --> 00:23:44,590
"and gay cops and
gay lumberjacks."

442
00:23:44,591 --> 00:23:47,759
And I just thought,
"Ooh, get her!"

443
00:23:50,346 --> 00:23:52,055
- Who's Martha Stewart?

444
00:23:52,056 --> 00:23:54,474
- She writes picture
books about gracious living.

445
00:23:54,475 --> 00:23:56,560
Martha says that
nothing else matters

446
00:23:56,561 --> 00:23:59,730
if you can do a nice,
dried floral arrangement.

447
00:23:59,731 --> 00:24:01,565
I worship her.

448
00:24:01,566 --> 00:24:03,651
- And, uh, who's Ann Miller?

449
00:24:05,111 --> 00:24:07,195
- Leave this house.

450
00:24:07,196 --> 00:24:11,033
- Some people think I'm dumb
just because I'm a chorus boy

451
00:24:11,034 --> 00:24:13,285
with an eighth-grade education.

452
00:24:13,286 --> 00:24:16,664
Well, I live in a townhouse
and I don't pay rent.

453
00:24:18,333 --> 00:24:21,419
I mean, I go to
screenings and I take cabs.

454
00:24:22,629 --> 00:24:23,629
Dumb, huh?

455
00:24:24,464 --> 00:24:27,175
And, yes, I'm in Cats.

456
00:24:29,135 --> 00:24:30,928
Now and forever.

457
00:24:30,929 --> 00:24:32,054
And I love it.

458
00:24:32,055 --> 00:24:33,055
I do.

459
00:24:33,056 --> 00:24:36,516
I figure I was too
young for A Chorus Line

460
00:24:36,517 --> 00:24:40,646
and too happy for Les Mis.

461
00:24:40,647 --> 00:24:42,606
I never got that show.

462
00:24:42,607 --> 00:24:43,732
Les Mis.

463
00:24:43,733 --> 00:24:46,026
I mean, it's about
this French guy, right?

464
00:24:46,027 --> 00:24:48,570
Who steals a loaf of
bread and then he suffers

465
00:24:48,571 --> 00:24:52,116
for the rest of
his life for toast.

466
00:24:53,826 --> 00:24:55,077
Get over it.

467
00:24:56,496 --> 00:24:58,330
- Why are there
four place settings?

468
00:25:08,174 --> 00:25:09,883
- What a surprise.
- Oh, my.

469
00:25:09,884 --> 00:25:11,551
- Sterling.

470
00:25:11,552 --> 00:25:13,929
- I met Stephen at the
show house-opening.

471
00:25:13,930 --> 00:25:16,139
I think you're perfect
for each other.

472
00:25:16,140 --> 00:25:17,432
- Me, too.

473
00:25:17,433 --> 00:25:18,309
- Hi, there.

474
00:25:18,310 --> 00:25:20,560
- Steve's a bartender, so you
have something in common.

475
00:25:20,561 --> 00:25:22,688
You can fall in love
and cater together.

476
00:25:22,689 --> 00:25:23,940
You'll be just like Roots.

477
00:25:33,157 --> 00:25:34,199
Jeffrey.

478
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:35,242
Jeff.

479
00:25:36,744 --> 00:25:39,329
. Jeffrey,
you are being ridiculous.

480
00:25:39,330 --> 00:25:40,747
Look at this man.

481
00:25:40,748 --> 00:25:43,166
- He's a dreamboat!
- Which one?

482
00:25:43,167 --> 00:25:44,002
- Me.

483
00:25:44,836 --> 00:25:45,670
- Heaven.

484
00:25:45,671 --> 00:25:48,171
- This sex thing has got
completely out of hand.

485
00:25:48,172 --> 00:25:49,464
- He's not having sex anymore.

486
00:25:49,465 --> 00:25:51,591
- He's not having sex,
what's the problem?

487
00:25:51,592 --> 00:25:52,885
- You mean, no nasty?

488
00:25:54,012 --> 00:25:56,263
- Wait, he's turning
down a date?

489
00:25:56,264 --> 00:25:57,347
I hate him.

490
00:25:57,348 --> 00:25:58,182
- Jeffrey!

491
00:25:58,182 --> 00:25:59,017
Jeffrey!

492
00:25:59,018 --> 00:26:00,809
Listen to reason.

493
00:26:00,810 --> 00:26:02,352
Jeffrey!

494
00:26:05,106 --> 00:26:08,734
. Steve, from the first
second I saw you at the gym,

495
00:26:08,735 --> 00:26:10,527
I've thought of nothing
and no one else.

496
00:26:10,528 --> 00:26:13,406
I have fantasized
about you, naked,

497
00:26:14,323 --> 00:26:17,784
about you kissing
me, talking to me,

498
00:26:17,785 --> 00:26:20,037
walking down the street with me,

499
00:26:20,038 --> 00:26:22,289
letting you do things to me
that I have only permitted

500
00:26:22,290 --> 00:26:24,042
with 5,000 other men.

501
00:26:25,334 --> 00:26:27,544
I think you could
change my life,

502
00:26:27,545 --> 00:26:29,547
and change the world.

503
00:26:31,174 --> 00:26:32,841
I think it's completely
and totally possible

504
00:26:32,842 --> 00:26:36,094
that we could be the
happiest people alive

505
00:26:36,095 --> 00:26:40,349
except I'm not having
sex anymore, so...

506
00:26:42,060 --> 00:26:43,060
Sorry.

507
00:26:44,353 --> 00:26:45,437
. Jeffrey, wait.
- No.

508
00:26:45,438 --> 00:26:46,772
- Jeffrey.

509
00:26:46,773 --> 00:26:48,774
Jeffrey, calm down.

510
00:26:48,775 --> 00:26:49,900
Jeffrey.

511
00:26:49,901 --> 00:26:51,359
Calm down.

512
00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:53,362
Now, I want to see you.

513
00:26:54,572 --> 00:26:57,199
And we can take this
as slow as you like.

514
00:26:57,200 --> 00:26:59,785
First step, how
about tomorrow night?

515
00:26:59,786 --> 00:27:01,578
- I'm working till 10:00.

516
00:27:01,579 --> 00:27:02,621
- Afterwards.

517
00:27:02,622 --> 00:27:03,498
- We'll have dinner.

518
00:27:03,499 --> 00:27:04,581
- You'll have fun.

519
00:27:04,582 --> 00:27:06,917
- You'll have appetizers.

520
00:27:06,918 --> 00:27:09,086
- I don't know.
- We're your friends.

521
00:27:09,087 --> 00:27:10,295
- You must obey us.

522
00:27:10,296 --> 00:27:12,090
- You have no choice, Jeffrey.

523
00:27:13,091 --> 00:27:14,216
- Well...
- Come on.

524
00:27:14,217 --> 00:27:17,094
You're <i>gay,</i> you're single.
- It isn't pretty.

525
00:27:17,095 --> 00:27:18,095
- God.

526
00:27:20,473 --> 00:27:21,473
Yes.

527
00:27:21,474 --> 00:27:22,308
- Yes!

528
00:27:34,278 --> 00:27:37,657
- Jeffrey, I am so proud of you.

529
00:27:39,283 --> 00:27:40,368
You're dating again.

530
00:27:41,994 --> 00:27:42,870
- Jeffrey?

531
00:27:42,871 --> 00:27:44,496
- Yes?

532
00:27:44,497 --> 00:27:45,497
- I just, uh...

533
00:27:47,667 --> 00:27:49,292
Just so there's no surprises.

534
00:27:49,293 --> 00:27:50,293
- Sure.

535
00:27:52,421 --> 00:27:53,506
- I'm HIV positive.

536
00:27:58,761 --> 00:28:00,387
- Uh...

537
00:28:00,388 --> 00:28:01,388
Okay, right.

538
00:28:03,266 --> 00:28:04,183
- Does that make a difference?

539
00:28:04,183 --> 00:28:05,059
- No.

540
00:28:05,060 --> 00:28:06,309
Of course not.

541
00:28:06,310 --> 00:28:07,769
Oh, please.

542
00:28:07,770 --> 00:28:10,022
- HIV-positive
men are the hottest.

543
00:28:11,482 --> 00:28:13,358
- I mean, I'd understand.

544
00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:17,946
I'd be hurt and I'd be
disappointed, but I <i>just...</i>

545
00:28:17,947 --> 00:28:18,989
I wanted to be clear.

546
00:28:18,990 --> 00:28:21,867
- No, really, it's fine.

547
00:28:21,868 --> 00:28:23,703
I mean, come on,
it's the 90s, right?

548
00:28:25,538 --> 00:28:26,789
Dinner at 10:00.

549
00:28:28,332 --> 00:28:29,332
I can't wait.

550
00:28:30,418 --> 00:28:32,836
- Do you feel lost?

551
00:28:32,837 --> 00:28:33,837
- I do.

552
00:28:36,090 --> 00:28:38,842
- So you come to me
and you say, "Debra",

553
00:28:38,843 --> 00:28:43,138
"what can I do to feel better
about myself in the world?"

554
00:28:43,139 --> 00:28:44,307
And you know what I say?

555
00:28:45,349 --> 00:28:49,060
Love, it's real, it works!

556
00:28:49,061 --> 00:28:50,312
Go for it!

557
00:28:55,568 --> 00:28:58,069
Now, I'm not here
as a priest or a guru

558
00:28:58,070 --> 00:28:59,529
or any sort of religious leader.

559
00:28:59,530 --> 00:29:02,825
I'm just someone
who likes to talk.

560
00:29:04,285 --> 00:29:05,785
And I have people
coming to me and saying,

561
00:29:05,786 --> 00:29:09,706
"Debra, I'm in love with an
alcoholic, what should I do?"

562
00:29:09,707 --> 00:29:14,419
And I say, "Don't look to me
for answers, look to yourself."

563
00:29:17,215 --> 00:29:19,507
Find that source of
unconditional love.

564
00:29:19,508 --> 00:29:23,011
Find that all-encompassing,
ultimate love.

565
00:29:23,012 --> 00:29:26,681
Surrender to that
unending, infinite love

566
00:29:26,682 --> 00:29:29,060
that will let you
say, "Hey, fuck you!"

567
00:29:31,395 --> 00:29:33,855
"Get out of my house
till you stop drinking!"

568
00:29:45,660 --> 00:29:46,826
Any questions?

569
00:29:50,498 --> 00:29:51,582
With the bad perm.

570
00:29:52,541 --> 00:29:53,625
- Oh, my God!

571
00:29:53,626 --> 00:29:54,793
Oh, God!

572
00:29:54,794 --> 00:29:55,794
Oh, my God!

573
00:29:55,795 --> 00:29:56,836
I'm coming.

574
00:30:00,758 --> 00:30:01,967
Oh, my God!

575
00:30:01,968 --> 00:30:02,802
Oh, Debra.

576
00:30:02,803 --> 00:30:04,052
Oh, God, Debra.

577
00:30:04,053 --> 00:30:08,473
Oh, first, I just wanted
to give you these

578
00:30:08,474 --> 00:30:11,101
little baby booties that I
crocheted for your baby.

579
00:30:11,102 --> 00:30:13,270
I know you discourage
gifts, except for donations,

580
00:30:13,271 --> 00:30:14,897
but I just had to.

581
00:30:16,107 --> 00:30:17,524
- Well, thank you.

582
00:30:17,525 --> 00:30:19,734
Now, what's up?

583
00:30:19,735 --> 00:30:24,657
- Well, uh, I just broke
up with my boyfriend.

584
00:30:25,324 --> 00:30:27,909
- Well, we've all been
there, haven't we?

585
00:30:27,910 --> 00:30:28,744
Yeah.

586
00:30:28,744 --> 00:30:29,662
- With my boyfriend?

587
00:30:29,663 --> 00:30:30,663
- Spill, baby.

588
00:30:32,290 --> 00:30:35,625
- Um, Josh and I
lived together for...

589
00:30:35,626 --> 00:30:37,460
I'm sorry, it's just hard.

590
00:30:37,461 --> 00:30:38,296
- It's okay.

591
00:30:38,297 --> 00:30:42,799
. For about four years,
and then he lost his job.

592
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:45,218
And then we just started
really arguing all the time.

593
00:30:45,219 --> 00:30:48,179
And then he tried
to hit me with the car.

594
00:30:48,180 --> 00:30:49,180
My car.

595
00:30:49,974 --> 00:30:51,266
- Whoa!

596
00:30:51,267 --> 00:30:52,851
Man!

597
00:30:52,852 --> 00:30:53,894
- I still love him.

598
00:30:56,647 --> 00:30:57,897
- Okay.

599
00:30:57,898 --> 00:31:00,900
Okay, okay, let me cook on this.

600
00:31:00,901 --> 00:31:03,445
It sounds to me like
you've got a problem

601
00:31:03,446 --> 00:31:05,989
with everybody's favorite.

602
00:31:05,990 --> 00:31:07,240
Low self-esteem!

603
00:31:07,241 --> 00:31:09,492
- Of course, I don't know you.

604
00:31:09,493 --> 00:31:11,953
Maybe you should
have low self-esteem.

605
00:31:11,954 --> 00:31:13,663
- I just really want
a relationship.

606
00:31:13,664 --> 00:31:15,540
- You want a relationship!

607
00:31:15,541 --> 00:31:18,585
Because you're afraid.

608
00:31:18,586 --> 00:31:19,420
- Right.

609
00:31:19,421 --> 00:31:21,061
- It all goes back to
mother, doesn't it?

610
00:31:22,506 --> 00:31:24,549
Did you love your mother?

611
00:31:24,550 --> 00:31:25,384
Yeah.

612
00:31:25,384 --> 00:31:26,218
Yeah, I guess.

613
00:31:26,219 --> 00:31:27,469
- Don't lie to me.
- Okay.

614
00:31:27,470 --> 00:31:28,470
- I'll call her.

615
00:31:28,471 --> 00:31:29,554
- What?

616
00:31:29,555 --> 00:31:31,265
- Did she withhold?
- Well...

617
00:31:33,351 --> 00:31:35,769
- Was there abuse?

618
00:31:35,770 --> 00:31:38,104
- No, I don't think...

619
00:31:38,105 --> 00:31:39,773
- Dig deep.

620
00:31:39,774 --> 00:31:43,818
. Yes, definitely, yes,
yes, there was, yes.

621
00:31:43,819 --> 00:31:45,111
- Go see her.
- Okay.

622
00:31:45,112 --> 00:31:47,155
- Tell her, Mom...
- Mom...

623
00:31:47,156 --> 00:31:48,323
- You were chilly.
- You were chilly.

624
00:31:48,324 --> 00:31:50,075
. You forgot my birthday.
- How dare you?

625
00:31:50,076 --> 00:31:50,910
- You beat me

626
00:31:50,911 --> 00:31:52,160
with a baseball bat.
- A bat.

627
00:31:52,161 --> 00:31:53,828
- But I understand.
- I understand.

628
00:31:53,829 --> 00:31:55,080
. I forgive.
- Forgive.

629
00:31:55,081 --> 00:31:57,123
- I love you.
- I love you.

630
00:31:57,124 --> 00:31:58,333
- And, Mom...
- Mom...

631
00:31:58,334 --> 00:31:59,918
- Now you're old.
- Oh, God.

632
00:31:59,919 --> 00:32:03,880
- You've got a plastic
hip and I've got the bat!

633
00:32:03,881 --> 00:32:04,715
- Right.

634
00:32:04,716 --> 00:32:06,049
- Next!

635
00:32:06,050 --> 00:32:07,342
Yes!

636
00:32:07,343 --> 00:32:08,343
I love you.
- Yes!

637
00:32:10,721 --> 00:32:12,138
Yes.

638
00:32:12,139 --> 00:32:13,349
The homosexual.

639
00:32:18,646 --> 00:32:19,480
- I can walk.

640
00:32:19,481 --> 00:32:21,232
- You could always walk.
- Shut up.

641
00:32:24,360 --> 00:32:26,319
Hey, there.

642
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:27,320
Hit me.

643
00:32:28,155 --> 00:32:29,155
- Um...

644
00:32:30,157 --> 00:32:31,200
Debra, uh...

645
00:32:32,326 --> 00:32:37,163
I think that sex is just
about the best thing ever.

646
00:32:42,086 --> 00:32:45,965
But I've met someone,
and he's HIV positive.

647
00:32:47,133 --> 00:32:50,760
And I am about to self-destruct.

648
00:32:50,761 --> 00:32:52,429
Now, I am a waiter.

649
00:32:52,430 --> 00:32:54,889
So I can't afford
your cassettes,

650
00:32:54,890 --> 00:32:56,892
or the mug, or the calendar.

651
00:32:57,893 --> 00:32:59,687
Do they mention this problem?

652
00:33:00,813 --> 00:33:01,772
- They sure do.

653
00:33:01,773 --> 00:33:02,939
It's in my book.

654
00:33:02,940 --> 00:33:04,190
Chapter 10.

655
00:33:04,191 --> 00:33:05,442
Cheap waiters.

656
00:33:08,279 --> 00:33:10,447
No, no, no, no, no, look, look.

657
00:33:10,448 --> 00:33:14,117
What you're talking
about is evil, am I right?

658
00:33:14,118 --> 00:33:14,952
- Um...

659
00:33:14,953 --> 00:33:16,620
- Why is there disease?

660
00:33:17,538 --> 00:33:19,248
Why was there a Hitler?

661
00:33:20,666 --> 00:33:22,667
Why are these acrylic?

662
00:33:24,837 --> 00:33:26,172
Here's the lowdown on evil.

663
00:33:27,548 --> 00:33:29,508
It is the absence of love.

664
00:33:30,426 --> 00:33:31,885
Ta-da!

665
00:33:31,886 --> 00:33:32,927
That's it.

666
00:33:32,928 --> 00:33:34,179
Case closed.

667
00:33:34,180 --> 00:33:38,057
Where you don't have
love, illness makes a home.

668
00:33:38,058 --> 00:33:39,059
- Wait, I'm sorry.

669
00:33:40,853 --> 00:33:42,937
Are you saying
that people get sick

670
00:33:42,938 --> 00:33:44,647
because they don't love enough

671
00:33:44,648 --> 00:33:47,942
or because people
don't love them, or...

672
00:33:47,943 --> 00:33:50,069
- It may sound simplistic.

673
00:33:50,070 --> 00:33:51,946
It may sound cruel.

674
00:33:51,947 --> 00:33:55,743
It may sound like I'm
blaming people for their illness.

675
00:33:57,077 --> 00:33:59,579
And maybe I am.

676
00:33:59,580 --> 00:34:00,914
That's Debra!

677
00:34:15,095 --> 00:34:19,849
- Hi, my name is Tim and
I am a sexual compulsive.

678
00:34:19,850 --> 00:34:20,851
Hi, Tim.

679
00:34:21,977 --> 00:34:22,853
- Hi.

680
00:34:22,854 --> 00:34:26,314
Today I have already
performed oral sex

681
00:34:26,315 --> 00:34:27,566
on three different people.

682
00:34:28,859 --> 00:34:29,859
I can't help myself.

683
00:34:31,570 --> 00:34:32,570
I'm an agent!

684
00:34:51,633 --> 00:34:54,092
Steve,
hi, it's Jeffrey,

685
00:34:54,093 --> 00:34:57,178
and I'm working
later than I thought.

686
00:34:57,179 --> 00:34:58,263
Private party, you know.

687
00:34:58,264 --> 00:35:01,307
So can we reschedule?

688
00:35:01,308 --> 00:35:02,350
Next week, maybe?

689
00:35:02,351 --> 00:35:03,727
I, um, I...

690
00:35:05,020 --> 00:35:06,020
I can't wait.

691
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:09,440
I'll call you.

692
00:35:10,401 --> 00:35:11,901
Take care.

693
00:35:24,206 --> 00:35:32,206
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

694
00:35:35,426 --> 00:35:38,678
♪ I tried so hard
to ignore this pain ♪

695
00:35:38,679 --> 00:35:42,557
♪ Cos I don't want
my love to be in vain ♪

696
00:35:42,558 --> 00:35:46,936
♪ Such a simple thing
to avoid me now ♪

697
00:35:46,937 --> 00:35:51,357
♪ You walked in my life
and I can't let you out ♪

698
00:35:51,358 --> 00:35:55,361
♪ From this day on
I will never forget ♪

699
00:35:55,362 --> 00:36:00,199
♪ All this time, like the
first night we spent ♪

700
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:02,785
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

701
00:36:02,786 --> 00:36:05,038
- What am I so afraid of?

702
00:36:05,039 --> 00:36:05,956
Him getting sick?

703
00:36:05,957 --> 00:36:07,041
Me getting sick?

704
00:36:08,167 --> 00:36:10,918
Why is the idea of a simple
dinner now like an evening

705
00:36:10,919 --> 00:36:12,004
of Russian roulette?

706
00:36:14,131 --> 00:36:16,174
I couldn't stay home
and be alone with myself,

707
00:36:16,175 --> 00:36:17,884
so I hit the streets.

708
00:36:17,885 --> 00:36:18,886
Jeffrey!

709
00:36:21,472 --> 00:36:22,889
What are you?

710
00:36:22,890 --> 00:36:24,182
- We're the Pink Panthers.

711
00:36:24,183 --> 00:36:26,809
We're part of a patrol
to prevent gay bashing.

712
00:36:26,810 --> 00:36:28,686
It was Darius's idea to join up.

713
00:36:28,687 --> 00:36:30,104
- I wanted to do something.

714
00:36:30,105 --> 00:36:31,398
- Something with a T-shirt.

715
00:36:35,861 --> 00:36:36,987
Don't you just love it?

716
00:36:40,908 --> 00:36:43,034
- Oh, look, the
Gay Pride statues.

717
00:36:51,293 --> 00:36:52,293
Come on.

718
00:36:57,841 --> 00:36:58,676
- Color.

719
00:36:58,676 --> 00:36:59,510
Think about it.

720
00:36:59,510 --> 00:37:00,344
- Stop it.

721
00:37:00,345 --> 00:37:02,512
You're not fat.

722
00:37:02,513 --> 00:37:05,473
<i>So,</i> Jeffrey, how was your date?

723
00:37:05,474 --> 00:37:06,599
Where's Steve?

724
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:07,476
- He, uh...

725
00:37:07,476 --> 00:37:08,394
I had to cancel.

726
00:37:08,394 --> 00:37:09,269
I just got off work.

727
00:37:09,270 --> 00:37:10,478
- Did you call him?

728
00:37:10,479 --> 00:37:12,397
. Of course, I left a
message on his machine.

729
00:37:12,398 --> 00:37:13,232
- Left a message.

730
00:37:13,233 --> 00:37:14,607
Would you call him again?

731
00:37:17,403 --> 00:37:18,403
- Pink Panthers.

732
00:37:19,196 --> 00:37:20,321
Hello, darling.

733
00:37:20,322 --> 00:37:22,156
- Is someone in trouble?

734
00:37:22,157 --> 00:37:23,157
- Really?

735
00:37:25,911 --> 00:37:26,911
No!

736
00:37:29,206 --> 00:37:30,124
Oh, no!

737
00:37:30,125 --> 00:37:31,207
- What, what?

738
00:37:31,208 --> 00:37:33,751
- We must get over to
Washington Square, right away.

739
00:37:33,752 --> 00:37:36,212
It's Todd, that huge
bodybuilder from the gym.

740
00:37:36,213 --> 00:37:37,630
- No, not Todd.

741
00:37:37,631 --> 00:37:39,091
- In shorts.
- Oh!

742
00:37:44,346 --> 00:37:46,889
- Call him.
- He's a doll.

743
00:37:46,890 --> 00:37:47,890
Taxi.

744
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:51,644
- Hi, my name is Dave, and
I am sexually compulsive.

745
00:37:51,645 --> 00:37:54,063
Hi, Dave.

746
00:37:54,064 --> 00:37:55,648
- I, uh...

747
00:37:55,649 --> 00:37:56,775
I love sex.

748
00:37:57,943 --> 00:37:58,943
Love it.

749
00:38:00,946 --> 00:38:03,489
Maybe it's because I
have a constant erection.

750
00:38:03,490 --> 00:38:05,534
I mean, like, 24 hours a day,

751
00:38:06,535 --> 00:38:09,454
or because my penis
is 14 inches long.

752
00:38:09,455 --> 00:38:11,038
Ooh!

753
00:38:11,039 --> 00:38:12,541
Hi, Dave.

754
00:38:33,270 --> 00:38:36,522
♪ Someday, I know,
he'll smile hello ♪

755
00:38:36,523 --> 00:38:40,109
♪ A warm welcome will be ♪

756
00:38:40,110 --> 00:38:41,986
♪ I'm looking for someone ♪

757
00:38:41,987 --> 00:38:43,571
- Oh, wow!

758
00:38:43,572 --> 00:38:45,615
Did you get my?

759
00:38:45,616 --> 00:38:46,450
- Yeah, yeah.

760
00:38:46,451 --> 00:38:47,825
I got your message.
- Good.

761
00:38:47,826 --> 00:38:48,826
- A party.

762
00:38:50,454 --> 00:38:51,454
Poor guy.

763
00:38:53,165 --> 00:38:55,958
Look, I was so revved
up, I was out dancing.

764
00:38:55,959 --> 00:38:57,168
- Great.

765
00:38:57,169 --> 00:38:58,962
Great, because,
you know, I had to...

766
00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:00,923
You know.
- I know.

767
00:39:02,382 --> 00:39:04,550
- No, really, I...

768
00:39:04,551 --> 00:39:05,551
- Jeffrey.

769
00:39:06,720 --> 00:39:08,846
It's not the first time
this has happened to me.

770
00:39:08,847 --> 00:39:09,847
You freaked.

771
00:39:10,641 --> 00:39:12,558
Cold feet.
- That is not true!

772
00:39:12,559 --> 00:39:13,559
That is not true.

773
00:39:17,815 --> 00:39:18,898
- Goodbye, Jeffrey.

774
00:39:18,899 --> 00:39:20,483
- Steve.

775
00:39:20,484 --> 00:39:22,610
♪ I'm looking for someone ♪

776
00:39:22,611 --> 00:39:23,570
- Steve.

777
00:39:23,571 --> 00:39:30,117
♪ Someone who's looking ♪

778
00:39:30,118 --> 00:39:31,619
- Please.

779
00:39:31,620 --> 00:39:33,622
Please, Steve, come
on, please, I'm so...

780
00:39:35,833 --> 00:39:36,833
I'm sorry.

781
00:39:39,419 --> 00:39:41,839
- You know, I can understand
about the HIV thing.

782
00:39:42,714 --> 00:39:43,714
It's not easy.

783
00:39:44,758 --> 00:39:46,301
But I don't like lying about it.

784
00:39:47,845 --> 00:39:48,845
Not anymore.

785
00:39:51,390 --> 00:39:52,431
- I'm sorry.

786
00:39:53,268 --> 00:39:55,686
- I'm sorry, you're sorry,
it's the new national anthem!

787
00:40:03,110 --> 00:40:05,279
Look, you said before
that you thought about me,

788
00:40:06,864 --> 00:40:08,406
that you fantasized.

789
00:40:08,407 --> 00:40:09,407
- I know.

790
00:40:12,494 --> 00:40:13,494
- Do you still?

791
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:18,040
- Yeah.

792
00:40:21,169 --> 00:40:24,046
- You know, there's a
lot of things we could do.

793
00:40:24,047 --> 00:40:25,381
- Yeah?

794
00:40:25,382 --> 00:40:26,382
- Safe things.

795
00:40:29,386 --> 00:40:30,386
Hot things.

796
00:40:33,891 --> 00:40:34,891
- I know.

797
00:40:40,939 --> 00:40:41,939
- But?

798
00:40:44,109 --> 00:40:46,694
You know, I can take being sick.

799
00:40:46,695 --> 00:40:49,280
I can fucking take
dying, but I can't take this.

800
00:40:49,281 --> 00:40:51,574
- All, right, you
should have told me.

801
00:40:51,575 --> 00:40:52,492
I did.

802
00:40:52,493 --> 00:40:54,660
. Well, sooner,
before things happened.

803
00:40:54,661 --> 00:40:56,329
. Oh, before I kissed you?!
- Yeah, yeah!

804
00:40:56,330 --> 00:40:57,371
- Oh!

805
00:40:57,372 --> 00:40:58,206
Okay.

806
00:40:58,207 --> 00:41:00,833
Oh, you didn't have
all the information.

807
00:41:00,834 --> 00:41:01,834
Okay.

808
00:41:02,753 --> 00:41:05,421
I've been positive
for almost five years.

809
00:41:05,422 --> 00:41:06,589
I was sick once.

810
00:41:06,590 --> 00:41:09,175
My T cells are decent.

811
00:41:09,176 --> 00:41:12,470
And every once in a
while, like 50 times a day,

812
00:41:12,471 --> 00:41:16,558
an hour, I get very tired of
being a person with AIDS,

813
00:41:18,310 --> 00:41:19,310
a red ribbon.

814
00:41:21,188 --> 00:41:22,481
So sometimes I forget.

815
00:41:24,858 --> 00:41:26,276
Sometimes I choose to forget.

816
00:41:29,071 --> 00:41:31,615
Sometimes I choose just
to be a gay man with a dick.

817
00:41:35,994 --> 00:41:36,995
Can you understand?

818
00:41:39,081 --> 00:41:40,081
At all?

819
00:41:41,291 --> 00:41:42,291
- Yeah.

820
00:41:49,675 --> 00:41:50,801
- Can I forget again?

821
00:41:53,762 --> 00:41:54,762
- No.

822
00:41:57,766 --> 00:41:58,850
- I want you, Jeffrey.

823
00:42:00,602 --> 00:42:02,062
I very well may even love you.

824
00:42:05,107 --> 00:42:06,107
That means nothing?

825
00:42:07,442 --> 00:42:08,694
That should beat anything.

826
00:42:10,278 --> 00:42:11,278
That should win.

827
00:42:15,409 --> 00:42:16,409
- I know.

828
00:42:17,411 --> 00:42:20,288
- So how come you get to
be the one with the problem?

829
00:42:21,665 --> 00:42:26,003
Why do I get to be
both sick and begging?

830
00:42:30,465 --> 00:42:31,550
Why won't you kiss me?

831
00:42:50,318 --> 00:42:51,318
- Sorry.

832
00:42:53,363 --> 00:42:54,197
Oh.

833
00:42:54,198 --> 00:42:56,324
I'm sorry, I'm sorry
I said I'm sorry.

834
00:42:59,870 --> 00:43:01,204
I'm sorry that you're sick

835
00:43:03,290 --> 00:43:05,791
and I am sorry that I lied.

836
00:43:05,792 --> 00:43:07,919
And I'm sorry that
life is suddenly...

837
00:43:10,088 --> 00:43:11,088
Radioactive.

838
00:43:18,889 --> 00:43:20,182
- Apology accepted.

839
00:43:23,226 --> 00:43:24,226
- Steve.

840
00:43:29,357 --> 00:43:30,649
Oh, Steve.

841
00:43:39,201 --> 00:43:41,828
Oh, I hate sex, and I hate love,

842
00:43:44,331 --> 00:43:47,249
and I hate the world
for giving me everything

843
00:43:47,250 --> 00:43:48,794
and then taking it all back!

844
00:43:53,590 --> 00:43:58,094
♪ They say ♪

845
00:43:58,095 --> 00:44:03,058
♪ The eagle tends to fly ♪

846
00:44:03,308 --> 00:44:08,354
♪ So stay till morning ♪

847
00:44:08,355 --> 00:44:10,941
♪ And fly by me ♪

848
00:44:13,068 --> 00:44:14,151
- Hey.

849
00:44:23,620 --> 00:44:26,455
I said, "hey."

850
00:44:26,456 --> 00:44:27,498
- Hey.

851
00:44:27,499 --> 00:44:29,667
You a gay man?

852
00:44:29,668 --> 00:44:30,752
You a faggot, hm?

853
00:44:32,420 --> 00:44:33,255
- Yeah.

854
00:44:33,255 --> 00:44:34,255
- You're queer?

855
00:44:34,965 --> 00:44:36,715
- All right, let's not
do this, okay, please?

856
00:44:38,260 --> 00:44:39,719
Suck my dick.

857
00:44:40,762 --> 00:44:41,971
- You really want me to do that?

858
00:44:41,972 --> 00:44:43,264
- Yeah.

859
00:44:46,184 --> 00:44:47,102
No!

860
00:44:47,103 --> 00:44:49,145
- Fuck you, man!

861
00:44:49,146 --> 00:44:50,855
You think you're so special?

862
00:44:50,856 --> 00:44:52,690
You go to the gym,
you got nice friends.

863
00:44:52,691 --> 00:44:53,650
You think you're so hot?

864
00:44:53,651 --> 00:44:55,360
- You think you're
better than us?!

865
00:44:56,611 --> 00:44:58,654
- I'm a waiter.
- Ooh, a waiter!

866
00:44:58,655 --> 00:45:00,322
Like at a restaurant?

867
00:45:00,323 --> 00:45:02,366
. Sort of, yeah.
- They let you touch food,

868
00:45:02,367 --> 00:45:04,493
put your little faggotty
fingers on it, huh?

869
00:45:04,494 --> 00:45:07,246
- That's right, that's
right, I touch it all the time.

870
00:45:07,247 --> 00:45:08,081
I spit in it.

871
00:45:08,082 --> 00:45:09,957
- Oh, Jesus!

872
00:45:09,958 --> 00:45:11,001
What restaurant?

873
00:45:12,460 --> 00:45:13,253
- Pizza House.

874
00:45:13,254 --> 00:45:15,087
- Oh, damn, man!
- Fuck off!

875
00:45:15,088 --> 00:45:16,172
Dust his ass.

876
00:45:16,173 --> 00:45:17,173
- Fine, fine.

877
00:45:18,508 --> 00:45:19,675
You have weapons?

878
00:45:19,676 --> 00:45:21,343
So do I.

879
00:45:21,344 --> 00:45:22,179
- Well, I got a knife.

880
00:45:22,180 --> 00:45:23,722
What do you got, huh?

881
00:45:25,473 --> 00:45:26,473
Uh?

882
00:45:27,934 --> 00:45:29,560
- Irony.

883
00:45:29,561 --> 00:45:30,562
Adjectives.

884
00:45:31,521 --> 00:45:32,688
Eyebrows.

885
00:45:32,689 --> 00:45:34,774
Fuck you!

886
00:45:37,110 --> 00:45:38,819
Hey, what's
going on down there?

887
00:45:38,820 --> 00:45:40,571
- He's got cash.
- What else he got?

888
00:45:40,572 --> 00:45:41,531
Come on!

889
00:45:41,532 --> 00:45:44,450
He's biting
my leg, I'm gonna get AIDS.

890
00:45:44,451 --> 00:45:45,701
Come on!

891
00:46:10,477 --> 00:46:11,685
- Terry.

892
00:46:18,151 --> 00:46:21,487
You know, when that
asshole started kicking me,

893
00:46:21,488 --> 00:46:26,117
I had this horrible,
stupid thought, just a flash.

894
00:46:27,953 --> 00:46:32,916
I thought, "At least
it's physical contact."

895
00:46:38,755 --> 00:46:42,550
Hey, I just found
my substitute for sex.

896
00:46:43,885 --> 00:46:45,220
A substitute for everything.

897
00:46:47,222 --> 00:46:48,222
Bruises.

898
00:46:50,308 --> 00:46:51,893
Answering machines.

899
00:46:53,979 --> 00:46:54,979
Fear.

900
00:47:00,777 --> 00:47:05,740
♪ Holding hands at midnight ♪

901
00:47:06,866 --> 00:47:10,577
♪ 'Neath a starry sky ♪

902
00:47:10,578 --> 00:47:12,997
♪ It's nice work ♪

903
00:47:12,998 --> 00:47:15,749
♪ If you can get it ♪

904
00:47:15,750 --> 00:47:20,546
♪ And you can
get it if you try ♪

905
00:47:20,547 --> 00:47:24,675
♪ Lovin' one who loves you ♪

906
00:47:24,676 --> 00:47:29,639
♪ And then taking that vow ♪

907
00:47:30,015 --> 00:47:32,683
♪ It's nice work ♪

908
00:47:32,684 --> 00:47:36,103
♪ If you can get it ♪

909
00:47:36,104 --> 00:47:37,396
♪ And if you get it ♪

910
00:47:37,397 --> 00:47:40,775
♪ Won't you tell me how? ♪

911
00:47:59,294 --> 00:48:01,671
. Can you tell if you're
having a nervous breakdown?

912
00:48:06,718 --> 00:48:07,718
- Hello?

913
00:48:08,428 --> 00:48:10,846
Well, howdy, stranger.

914
00:48:10,847 --> 00:48:11,847
It's Jeff!

915
00:48:13,308 --> 00:48:14,308
- I love them.

916
00:48:15,060 --> 00:48:17,312
- Well, isn't this a
special occasion?

917
00:48:18,229 --> 00:48:20,106
- What if I could
really talk to them?

918
00:48:21,649 --> 00:48:23,318
And what if they
had some answers?

919
00:48:24,444 --> 00:48:26,029
Or would that just be too weird?

920
00:48:27,155 --> 00:48:30,240
Dad, I've stopped having sex.

921
00:48:30,241 --> 00:48:33,994
- Eileen, Jeff's
stopped having sex.

922
00:48:33,995 --> 00:48:35,830
- Oh, I've got it up here, dear.

923
00:48:36,831 --> 00:48:38,165
No sex?

924
00:48:38,166 --> 00:48:40,626
You mean just safe
sex, don't you, dear?

925
00:48:41,462 --> 00:48:43,379
- No, Mom, I hate safe sex.

926
00:48:44,214 --> 00:48:45,131
- Wrestling those condoms.

927
00:48:45,132 --> 00:48:46,757
- Water-based lubricant.

928
00:48:46,758 --> 00:48:47,925
- Dry kissing.

929
00:48:47,926 --> 00:48:51,261
- Sweetheart, are
you a top or a bottom?

930
00:48:51,262 --> 00:48:52,638
- Mother.

931
00:48:52,639 --> 00:48:54,598
- Have you tried any
of those workshops?

932
00:48:54,599 --> 00:48:57,351
- Oh, what about
a jerk-off club?

933
00:48:57,352 --> 00:48:59,186
- How about phone sex?

934
00:48:59,187 --> 00:49:00,021
- What?

935
00:49:00,022 --> 00:49:01,563
- Oh, Fred, let's help him out.

936
00:49:01,564 --> 00:49:03,900
Sweetheart, what
are you wearing?

937
00:49:05,360 --> 00:49:07,152
- Sweats and a T-shirt.

938
00:49:07,153 --> 00:49:08,946
- Oh, that's hot.

939
00:49:08,947 --> 00:49:10,614
- That's very hot.

940
00:49:10,615 --> 00:49:11,615
- Are you alone?

941
00:49:12,742 --> 00:49:15,536
- Dad, I'm not gonna have
phone sex with you and Mom.

942
00:49:15,537 --> 00:49:18,080
- Darling, have you
looked at any videos?

943
00:49:18,081 --> 00:49:18,873
- Hardcore?

944
00:49:18,874 --> 00:49:20,999
Have you explored masturbation?

945
00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:22,126
- As if we have to ask.

946
00:49:22,127 --> 00:49:24,503
Sometimes, I never could
get into that bathroom.

947
00:49:24,504 --> 00:49:28,465
. We like that new Jeff
Stryker film, Power Tool ll.

948
00:49:28,466 --> 00:49:31,343
- Oh, dear, do you like it
when they shave their assholes?

949
00:49:31,344 --> 00:49:32,344
- Huh.

950
00:49:33,596 --> 00:49:35,139
- Shave their what?

951
00:49:35,140 --> 00:49:37,766
- Oh, and what about
this person, Steve?

952
00:49:37,767 --> 00:49:39,810
He seems real nice.

953
00:49:39,811 --> 00:49:42,646
- Dad, Steve is HIV positive.
- Oh, and a dreamboat.

954
00:49:42,647 --> 00:49:44,065
Check the basket.
- Uh.

955
00:49:46,025 --> 00:49:50,947
Oh, my God!

956
00:49:54,033 --> 00:49:58,620
Hi, my name is Jeffrey
and I'm just like you.

957
00:49:58,621 --> 00:50:00,372
Jeffrey!

958
00:50:00,373 --> 00:50:01,791
- I'm a sexual compulsive.

959
00:50:03,501 --> 00:50:07,087
But I haven't had sex
in almost six months.

960
00:50:10,717 --> 00:50:12,510
I never even think
about having sex.

961
00:50:13,720 --> 00:50:15,137
Not anymore.

962
00:50:15,138 --> 00:50:18,849
But I used to be compulsive.

963
00:50:23,813 --> 00:50:25,648
And all because
of Billy Kierney.

964
00:50:27,650 --> 00:50:28,650
I blame him.

965
00:50:31,237 --> 00:50:32,071
That's where it started.

966
00:50:32,072 --> 00:50:34,115
He kept daring me.

967
00:50:36,284 --> 00:50:41,206
"I dare you to take off your
clothes, even your underpants."

968
00:50:44,375 --> 00:50:49,088
"I dare you to kiss
me on the mouth."

969
00:50:51,341 --> 00:50:52,341
Oh, God.

970
00:50:54,469 --> 00:50:58,223
Two naked 14-year-old boys

971
00:50:59,474 --> 00:51:02,268
in front of the big mirror
in my parents' bedroom,

972
00:51:04,479 --> 00:51:05,939
I'm having sex!

973
00:51:07,899 --> 00:51:09,943
And I'm watching
myself have sex.

974
00:51:12,237 --> 00:51:13,988
"Please don't do that."

975
00:51:16,407 --> 00:51:17,992
"Please don't stop."

976
00:51:29,254 --> 00:51:30,671
Stop.

977
00:51:41,015 --> 00:51:42,684
I'm working a memorial.

978
00:51:43,726 --> 00:51:44,726
Another one.

979
00:51:46,312 --> 00:51:47,312
- Thank you.

980
00:51:50,733 --> 00:51:51,817
- Ooh.

981
00:51:51,818 --> 00:51:53,444
It's for a curator at the Met.

982
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:56,406
The speakers were great.

983
00:51:57,615 --> 00:51:58,616
His straight brother.

984
00:52:00,076 --> 00:52:01,076
His doctor.

985
00:52:02,870 --> 00:52:05,914
Oh, his gorgeous
Italian boyfriend.

986
00:52:11,963 --> 00:52:13,422
Oh, my God.

987
00:52:13,423 --> 00:52:16,717
Oh, I'm so disgusting.

988
00:52:16,718 --> 00:52:18,010
You know what I'm doing?

989
00:52:18,011 --> 00:52:19,469
I'm cruising a memorial.

990
00:52:19,470 --> 00:52:21,138
- Oh, please, everybody is.

991
00:52:21,139 --> 00:52:22,639
It's not that we're not sad,

992
00:52:22,640 --> 00:52:25,143
it's just that there are
all these guys here.

993
00:52:27,812 --> 00:52:30,397
- Who's that over
there, talking to Darius?

994
00:52:30,398 --> 00:52:32,858
- Oh, it's Todd Malcolm.

995
00:52:38,072 --> 00:52:38,906
- What?

996
00:52:38,907 --> 00:52:40,283
- You know, the
guy from the gym.

997
00:52:47,999 --> 00:52:49,625
- Oh, my God,
he's blind, isn't he?

998
00:52:49,626 --> 00:52:51,419
- It's just a side
effect, they say.

999
00:52:55,131 --> 00:52:56,131
Jeffrey.

1000
00:52:57,216 --> 00:53:02,180
Jeffrey!

1001
00:53:07,935 --> 00:53:09,186
Jeffrey, what are you doing?

1002
00:53:09,187 --> 00:53:13,523
. When I first came to this
city, Todd Malcolm was a god.

1003
00:53:13,524 --> 00:53:15,067
I used to watch him
and his lover dancing.

1004
00:53:15,068 --> 00:53:16,985
People, people would gasp.

1005
00:53:16,986 --> 00:53:18,570
- Oh, stop it.

1006
00:53:18,571 --> 00:53:19,614
- Hi, guys.

1007
00:53:20,615 --> 00:53:21,449
Did you see Todd?

1008
00:53:21,449 --> 00:53:22,283
Of course.

1009
00:53:22,284 --> 00:53:23,617
- He looks better.

1010
00:53:23,618 --> 00:53:25,286
- Darius, Todd is dying!

1011
00:53:31,376 --> 00:53:32,709
I'm sorry.

1012
00:53:32,710 --> 00:53:33,920
- What's going on here?

1013
00:53:35,046 --> 00:53:36,339
This is about Todd, right?

1014
00:53:37,548 --> 00:53:39,716
Do you know what
we were talking about?

1015
00:53:39,717 --> 00:53:41,176
This memorial.

1016
00:53:41,177 --> 00:53:43,136
Cannoli, frozen.

1017
00:53:43,137 --> 00:53:46,014
The drinks are watered
and I hated that music.

1018
00:53:46,015 --> 00:53:47,934
And at my memorial, I want Liza.

1019
00:53:49,102 --> 00:53:51,144
- You are not having a memorial.

1020
00:53:51,145 --> 00:53:52,896
- Okay, in a million years.

1021
00:53:52,897 --> 00:53:54,189
- You are not going to get sick.

1022
00:53:54,190 --> 00:53:55,566
I thought I made that clear.

1023
00:53:57,026 --> 00:53:58,026
- But I was sick.

1024
00:53:58,945 --> 00:54:00,029
I had pneumonia.

1025
00:54:02,532 --> 00:54:03,532
And it went away.

1026
00:54:04,909 --> 00:54:06,577
But I want the Winter Garden.

1027
00:54:07,954 --> 00:54:08,788
I do.

1028
00:54:08,789 --> 00:54:10,414
I want all the other
cats to come out

1029
00:54:10,415 --> 00:54:13,333
and to sing Darius
to the tune of Memory.

1030
00:54:13,334 --> 00:54:16,878
"Darius, we all thought
you were fabulous."

1031
00:54:16,879 --> 00:54:18,423
- Your service
will run for years.

1032
00:54:21,676 --> 00:54:22,676
What?

1033
00:54:24,220 --> 00:54:25,430
- This is a memorial.

1034
00:54:27,265 --> 00:54:28,224
We're making remarks.

1035
00:54:28,224 --> 00:54:29,183
We're dishing it.

1036
00:54:29,184 --> 00:54:30,976
- Oh, please.

1037
00:54:30,977 --> 00:54:31,977
Picture mine.

1038
00:54:32,937 --> 00:54:35,564
And remember, Jeffrey,
I want an open coffin.

1039
00:54:35,565 --> 00:54:37,024
They can say it to my face.

1040
00:54:38,526 --> 00:54:39,360
Good idea.

1041
00:54:39,361 --> 00:54:41,069
- Well, I like it.

1042
00:54:41,070 --> 00:54:45,992
I mean, cute guys,
and Liza, and dish.

1043
00:54:46,451 --> 00:54:48,119
It's not a cure
for AIDS, Jeffrey,

1044
00:54:48,995 --> 00:54:50,663
but it's the opposite of AIDS.

1045
00:54:51,831 --> 00:54:53,457
Right?

1046
00:54:53,458 --> 00:54:58,170
. Friends, family,
loved ones, colleagues...

1047
00:54:58,171 --> 00:54:59,629
- They're praying.

1048
00:54:59,630 --> 00:55:01,131
We gather now...

1049
00:55:01,132 --> 00:55:02,924
Oh, come on.

1050
00:55:02,925 --> 00:55:07,305
Honor and celebrate
a wonderful life of a man

1051
00:55:08,264 --> 00:55:09,514
and great good friend...

1052
00:55:09,515 --> 00:55:11,142
- Oh, my God.

1053
00:55:23,738 --> 00:55:25,071
Wasn't
that marvelous?

1054
00:55:25,072 --> 00:55:27,949
Oh,
please, it's still ballet.

1055
00:55:27,950 --> 00:55:29,785
- It is The Nutcracker.

1056
00:55:29,786 --> 00:55:30,869
It's my favorite.

1057
00:55:30,870 --> 00:55:32,871
When I was a kid I
used to be so afraid

1058
00:55:32,872 --> 00:55:34,706
of the big dancing mice.

1059
00:55:34,707 --> 00:55:36,124
Now I'm a cat.

1060
00:55:36,125 --> 00:55:38,586
- His therapist is ecstatic.

1061
00:55:40,421 --> 00:55:41,421
Sweetie?

1062
00:55:42,590 --> 00:55:44,090
- I'm fine.

1063
00:55:44,091 --> 00:55:45,675
I just, I...

1064
00:55:46,595 --> 00:55:47,637
I don't know.

1065
00:55:48,721 --> 00:55:49,889
I'm just a little dizzy.

1066
00:55:55,102 --> 00:55:56,102
- Oh, my God!

1067
00:56:01,776 --> 00:56:03,485
Please, everyone,
please, stand back.

1068
00:56:03,486 --> 00:56:04,737
- Put this under his head.

1069
00:56:06,739 --> 00:56:08,240
Will somebody please
get an ambulance?

1070
00:56:08,241 --> 00:56:10,325
. No, I'm fine.
- Don't talk.

1071
00:56:10,326 --> 00:56:11,910
You are going to be fine.

1072
00:56:11,911 --> 00:56:13,119
- Excuse me, I'm
the house manager.

1073
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:14,788
Is there a problem?

1074
00:56:14,789 --> 00:56:16,331
- Mommy.
- It's all right, sweetheart.

1075
00:56:16,332 --> 00:56:18,166
- Now, lie still.

1076
00:56:18,167 --> 00:56:19,918
Thank you, thank you everyone.

1077
00:56:19,919 --> 00:56:21,253
- I'm just dehydrated.

1078
00:56:21,254 --> 00:56:22,504
You're dehydrated?

1079
00:56:22,505 --> 00:56:25,215
- It's from the Itraconazole.

1080
00:56:25,216 --> 00:56:26,383
- What's an itraconazole?

1081
00:56:26,384 --> 00:56:28,343
- It's a medicine, sweetheart.

1082
00:56:28,344 --> 00:56:29,469
My cousin's on it.

1083
00:56:29,470 --> 00:56:30,554
- Is it like Prozac?

1084
00:56:30,555 --> 00:56:32,598
Here, put
this on his forehead.

1085
00:56:35,309 --> 00:56:36,685
- I'm fine.

1086
00:56:36,686 --> 00:56:37,686
I'm just...

1087
00:56:38,521 --> 00:56:39,355
I'm okay.

1088
00:56:39,355 --> 00:56:40,189
Really, I'm okay.

1089
00:56:40,189 --> 00:56:41,023
- Maybe you shouldn't move him.

1090
00:56:41,024 --> 00:56:42,191
- We have a cot.

1091
00:56:43,234 --> 00:56:44,234
- I'm fine.

1092
00:56:45,111 --> 00:56:46,278
Thank you.

1093
00:56:46,279 --> 00:56:47,779
- We'll get this back to you.

1094
00:56:47,780 --> 00:56:49,239
- I'm fine.

1095
00:56:49,240 --> 00:56:50,867
Look, I'm walking.

1096
00:56:55,705 --> 00:56:57,080
Darius!

1097
00:58:06,692 --> 00:58:07,818
- Excuse me?

1098
00:58:10,112 --> 00:58:11,112
- Come on.

1099
00:58:23,125 --> 00:58:24,125
This way.

1100
00:58:34,470 --> 00:58:35,470
In here.

1101
00:58:41,769 --> 00:58:43,728
- Where are we?
- Oh, a storeroom.

1102
00:58:43,729 --> 00:58:45,564
Old hymnals that
need to be rebound.

1103
00:58:49,860 --> 00:58:50,695
- Hey!

1104
00:58:50,696 --> 00:58:52,237
- What, what's wrong?

1105
00:58:52,238 --> 00:58:53,072
Is it the collar?

1106
00:58:53,073 --> 00:58:54,781
Is that a turnoff?

1107
00:58:54,782 --> 00:58:55,658
- Wait, wait, no!

1108
00:58:55,659 --> 00:58:57,033
What's going on here?

1109
00:58:57,034 --> 00:58:58,952
Why did you bring me in here?

1110
00:58:58,953 --> 00:58:59,953
- I'm attracted to you.

1111
00:58:59,954 --> 00:59:01,705
The door's locked.

1112
00:59:01,706 --> 00:59:02,706
- Wait!

1113
00:59:03,541 --> 00:59:04,708
You really a priest?

1114
00:59:04,709 --> 00:59:05,793
- Of course!

1115
00:59:07,753 --> 00:59:11,381
- But aren't you supposed
to be straight and celibate?

1116
00:59:11,382 --> 00:59:13,049
- Maybe you didn't hear me.

1117
00:59:13,050 --> 00:59:16,302
I'm a Catholic priest.

1118
00:59:16,303 --> 00:59:18,013
Historically, that
falls somewhere

1119
00:59:18,014 --> 00:59:20,515
in between chorus
boy and florist.

1120
00:59:20,516 --> 00:59:22,100
Come here, you big lug.

1121
00:59:22,101 --> 00:59:23,268
- Get away from me!

1122
00:59:23,269 --> 00:59:24,728
Don't touch me.

1123
00:59:24,729 --> 00:59:25,770
- I'm sorry.

1124
00:59:25,771 --> 00:59:26,772
Hands off.

1125
00:59:28,441 --> 00:59:29,817
Wait, what is with you?

1126
00:59:33,946 --> 00:59:36,866
- One of my best
friends, he's sick.

1127
00:59:37,950 --> 00:59:41,829
And he fell, but he's
home now, but, I just can't...

1128
00:59:42,913 --> 00:59:44,998
I've been walking
around for 48 hours.

1129
00:59:44,999 --> 00:59:48,085
And I just keep asking
myself, "What if it was Steve?"

1130
00:59:49,378 --> 00:59:53,006
And what, how can I love
somebody and watch that happen?

1131
00:59:53,007 --> 00:59:54,007
- Steve?

1132
00:59:54,800 --> 00:59:56,343
- Why did He do this?

1133
00:59:57,595 --> 00:59:58,595
Huh?

1134
00:59:59,263 --> 01:00:00,805
You're a priest.

1135
01:00:00,806 --> 01:00:04,101
You have to tell me,
why did He do this?

1136
01:00:07,646 --> 01:00:10,482
Why did God make
the world this way?

1137
01:00:10,483 --> 01:00:11,859
Why do I have to live in it?

1138
01:00:12,943 --> 01:00:13,778
Don't hit me.

1139
01:00:13,779 --> 01:00:15,445
- Then you tell me!
- Okay.

1140
01:00:15,446 --> 01:00:16,446
Okay.

1141
01:00:17,615 --> 01:00:18,908
All I wanted was a quickie.

1142
01:00:20,493 --> 01:00:23,787
If I show you the
true face of God,

1143
01:00:23,788 --> 01:00:25,789
if I tell you, will you listen?

1144
01:00:25,790 --> 01:00:26,624
- Of course.

1145
01:00:26,625 --> 01:00:28,416
- Really listen?!

1146
01:00:28,417 --> 01:00:29,417
- Yes.

1147
01:00:32,671 --> 01:00:33,671
- Okay.

1148
01:00:35,424 --> 01:00:36,884
Here's how you see God.

1149
01:00:38,052 --> 01:00:40,262
He's a Columbia
recording artist.

1150
01:00:41,639 --> 01:00:44,557
You got your idea of God
where most gay kids get it?

1151
01:00:44,558 --> 01:00:46,810
My Fair Lady, original cast.

1152
01:00:46,811 --> 01:00:47,645
See?

1153
01:00:47,646 --> 01:00:48,686
George Bernard
Shaw up in the clouds

1154
01:00:48,687 --> 01:00:52,273
manipulating Rex Harrison
and Julie Andrews on strings.

1155
01:00:52,274 --> 01:00:54,734
It was your parents'
album, you were little,

1156
01:00:54,735 --> 01:00:57,320
you thought it was
a picture of God.

1157
01:00:57,321 --> 01:00:58,155
- Yeah.

1158
01:00:58,156 --> 01:01:01,324
- You were almost there,
because God is on this record.

1159
01:01:01,325 --> 01:01:03,243
Lerner and Loewe.

1160
01:01:03,244 --> 01:01:05,578
♪ Why can't the English? ♪

1161
01:01:05,579 --> 01:01:08,498
♪ Wouldn't it be lovely? ♪

1162
01:01:08,499 --> 01:01:09,541
I'm telling you, the only times

1163
01:01:09,542 --> 01:01:12,710
I really feel the presence of
God are when I'm having sex

1164
01:01:12,711 --> 01:01:15,130
and during a great
Broadway musical.

1165
01:01:15,131 --> 01:01:16,506
Come on.

1166
01:01:20,928 --> 01:01:21,762
Number two.

1167
01:01:29,228 --> 01:01:30,104
Hi.

1168
01:01:30,104 --> 01:01:31,104
Look.

1169
01:01:32,731 --> 01:01:33,731
Huh.

1170
01:01:34,441 --> 01:01:35,484
Hello, gorgeous.

1171
01:01:36,777 --> 01:01:37,611
- Okla-homa.

1172
01:01:37,612 --> 01:01:40,530
Okla-homa.
- Oh, you're nuts.

1173
01:01:40,531 --> 01:01:41,948
- Oh, excuse me?

1174
01:01:41,949 --> 01:01:44,492
Those people out there,
they're worshiping resurrections,

1175
01:01:44,493 --> 01:01:47,412
virgin births,
Ben-Hur, and I'm nuts?

1176
01:01:47,413 --> 01:01:51,416
- I'm not, I'm talking
about a plague.

1177
01:01:51,417 --> 01:01:53,043
I'm talking about...

1178
01:01:54,253 --> 01:01:57,338
I don't know, evil.
- Yes, Satan.

1179
01:01:57,339 --> 01:01:59,007
Well, that's another story.

1180
01:01:59,008 --> 01:02:00,050
I've seen him.

1181
01:02:00,968 --> 01:02:01,927
- What?

1182
01:02:01,928 --> 01:02:04,888
Disease, hospitals, fear?

1183
01:02:04,889 --> 01:02:08,934
- Phantom, Miss
Saigon, Sunset Boulevard.

1184
01:02:10,144 --> 01:02:11,061
- Got to go.

1185
01:02:11,061 --> 01:02:11,854
- Why?

1186
01:02:11,855 --> 01:02:13,438
Because I haven't told you
the secret of life in five words

1187
01:02:13,439 --> 01:02:14,731
or less, you're getting antsy?

1188
01:02:14,732 --> 01:02:16,482
- I need to know.

1189
01:02:16,483 --> 01:02:18,277
- Okay, okay.

1190
01:02:19,820 --> 01:02:20,696
Oh, God.

1191
01:02:20,697 --> 01:02:22,947
I am so horny.

1192
01:02:22,948 --> 01:02:24,741
Do you know what
it's like in here?

1193
01:02:24,742 --> 01:02:29,162
"Father, I abused myself
eight times last week."

1194
01:02:29,163 --> 01:02:31,956
"Father, I'm attracted
to my brother-in-law."

1195
01:02:31,957 --> 01:02:34,792
"Father, I'm having impure
thoughts about my soccer coach."

1196
01:02:34,793 --> 01:02:36,169
Where are the Polaroids?

1197
01:02:36,170 --> 01:02:37,170
What am I, a mind reader?

1198
01:02:37,171 --> 01:02:39,757
"Say six Hail Marys and
bring me your shorts!"

1199
01:02:40,716 --> 01:02:42,009
Okay, okay.

1200
01:02:43,010 --> 01:02:44,010
I'm sorry.

1201
01:02:45,721 --> 01:02:48,015
Secret of life.

1202
01:02:55,564 --> 01:02:59,193
Darling, have you
ever been to a picnic

1203
01:03:00,444 --> 01:03:03,989
and someone blows up a balloon?

1204
01:03:04,907 --> 01:03:06,784
And everyone starts
tossing it around

1205
01:03:07,993 --> 01:03:11,537
and it's always just
about to touch the ground.

1206
01:03:11,538 --> 01:03:14,541
But someone always
gets there just in time

1207
01:03:15,459 --> 01:03:16,710
to tap it back up.

1208
01:03:18,087 --> 01:03:21,632
That balloon, that's God.

1209
01:03:23,259 --> 01:03:26,177
The very best in all of us.

1210
01:03:26,178 --> 01:03:28,973
The kindness, the heavy petting.

1211
01:03:30,557 --> 01:03:31,557
Funny Girl.

1212
01:03:35,646 --> 01:03:36,939
- What about the bad stuff?

1213
01:03:38,148 --> 01:03:42,652
When the balloon hits
the ground, when it bursts?

1214
01:03:42,653 --> 01:03:43,487
- Who cares?

1215
01:03:43,488 --> 01:03:46,572
Evil bores me, it's one
note, it doesn't sing!

1216
01:03:53,080 --> 01:03:54,664
Of course life sucks.

1217
01:03:54,665 --> 01:03:57,458
It always will, so why
not make the most of it?

1218
01:03:57,459 --> 01:04:00,586
How dare you not lunge
for any shred of happiness?

1219
01:04:00,587 --> 01:04:03,339
- But Steve, who's sick,
who I'm afraid to touch?

1220
01:04:03,340 --> 01:04:06,175
- So maybe you need a
rubber, or a surgical mask,

1221
01:04:06,176 --> 01:04:07,468
or a roll of plastic wrap.

1222
01:04:07,469 --> 01:04:10,013
- How dare you give up sex
when there are children in Europe

1223
01:04:10,014 --> 01:04:11,347
who can't get a date?

1224
01:04:11,348 --> 01:04:14,810
- The only real blasphemy
is the refusal of joy,

1225
01:04:15,811 --> 01:04:17,645
of a corsage, and a <i>kiss.</i>

1226
01:04:17,646 --> 01:04:19,355
- Amen.

1227
01:04:22,484 --> 01:04:25,194
♪ I had a dream ♪

1228
01:04:25,195 --> 01:04:28,489
♪ A dream about you, baby ♪

1229
01:04:28,490 --> 01:04:31,367
♪ It's gonna come true ♪

1230
01:04:31,368 --> 01:04:34,245
♪ 'Cause, baby ♪

1231
01:04:34,246 --> 01:04:37,915
♪ You'll be swell ♪

1232
01:04:37,916 --> 01:04:38,916
♪ You'll be great ♪

1233
01:04:38,917 --> 01:04:40,960
♪ Come on, ladies,
you know the words ♪

1234
01:04:40,961 --> 01:04:44,589
♪ Gonna have the
whole world on a plate ♪

1235
01:04:44,590 --> 01:04:46,424
♪ Starting here ♪

1236
01:04:46,425 --> 01:04:48,134
♪ Starting now ♪

1237
01:04:48,135 --> 01:04:52,598
♪ Honey, everything's
coming up roses ♪

1238
01:04:53,682 --> 01:04:54,641
Yeah!

1239
01:04:54,642 --> 01:04:56,684
♪ Ta-da, ta-da, ta-da ♪

1240
01:05:08,280 --> 01:05:13,243
♪ The air is sizzlin' as we
walk through the crowd ♪

1241
01:05:15,829 --> 01:05:20,793
♪ My heart is pumping, never
deep down touch the ground ♪

1242
01:05:21,752 --> 01:05:23,378
♪ No, no ♪

1243
01:05:23,379 --> 01:05:28,342
♪ There's no resisting the
men among the crowd ♪

1244
01:05:35,099 --> 01:05:38,059
♪ Oh, let the
celebrating begin ♪

1245
01:05:38,060 --> 01:05:40,728
♪ Living it up ♪

1246
01:05:40,729 --> 01:05:45,692
♪ We're living it up
because we got to be proud ♪

1247
01:05:46,610 --> 01:05:50,196
♪ And we're gonna
say it out loud ♪

1248
01:05:50,197 --> 01:05:53,241
♪ Oh, let the
celebrating begin ♪

1249
01:05:53,242 --> 01:05:55,952
♪ Living it up ♪

1250
01:05:55,953 --> 01:06:00,916
♪ The men among the crowd ♪

1251
01:06:01,708 --> 01:06:05,253
♪ Let the celebrating begin ♪

1252
01:06:05,254 --> 01:06:08,339
♪ Oh, let the
celebrating begin ♪

1253
01:06:08,340 --> 01:06:10,550
♪ Living it up ♪

1254
01:06:10,551 --> 01:06:12,468
♪ Oh, we're living it up ♪

1255
01:06:12,469 --> 01:06:15,721
♪ 'Cause we've got to be proud ♪

1256
01:06:16,890 --> 01:06:18,349
♪ And we're gonna
say it out loud ♪

1257
01:06:18,350 --> 01:06:20,309
- Okay, everybody, listen up.

1258
01:06:20,310 --> 01:06:23,146
The parade is about to begin.

1259
01:06:23,147 --> 01:06:25,982
The first unit
will be as follows:

1260
01:06:25,983 --> 01:06:27,358
Dykes On Bikes.

1261
01:06:29,361 --> 01:06:32,697
Concerned Pan-Asian Bisexuals.

1262
01:06:34,450 --> 01:06:37,286
Black Gay Republicans.

1263
01:06:40,122 --> 01:06:41,122
Hello?

1264
01:06:41,123 --> 01:06:42,082
- Excuse me.

1265
01:06:42,083 --> 01:06:44,000
Excuse me, are
you with the parade?

1266
01:06:44,001 --> 01:06:44,835
I'm lost.

1267
01:06:44,835 --> 01:06:45,711
What
group are you with?

1268
01:06:45,712 --> 01:06:47,170
- Ma, did you find out?

1269
01:06:47,171 --> 01:06:48,379
We're marching together.

1270
01:06:48,380 --> 01:06:53,343
. I'm so proud of my preoperative
transsexual lesbian son.

1271
01:06:53,594 --> 01:06:54,594
- Steve.

1272
01:06:55,554 --> 01:06:56,971
- Jeffrey.

1273
01:06:56,972 --> 01:06:57,972
Hey.

1274
01:06:58,891 --> 01:06:59,974
What group you're marching with?

1275
01:06:59,975 --> 01:07:02,226
- Excuse me, could
you take our picture

1276
01:07:02,227 --> 01:07:04,437
with this nice young man?

1277
01:07:04,438 --> 01:07:06,230
This is our first parade.

1278
01:07:06,231 --> 01:07:07,940
Parents
of transsexuals.

1279
01:07:07,941 --> 01:07:09,942
- Preoperative
transsexual lesbians.

1280
01:07:09,943 --> 01:07:13,029
- At first, I was
confused as anyone.

1281
01:07:13,030 --> 01:07:14,030
More confused.

1282
01:07:17,826 --> 01:07:20,161
When Anthony first came to..
- Angelique, Ma.

1283
01:07:20,162 --> 01:07:22,497
- Oh, you were still
Tony at the time.

1284
01:07:22,498 --> 01:07:26,083
He comes to me, and he
says, "Ma, I wanna be a woman."

1285
01:07:26,084 --> 01:07:28,544
"I always felt like one."

1286
01:07:28,545 --> 01:07:30,129
I said, "What are you, gay?"

1287
01:07:30,130 --> 01:07:33,133
He said, "No, I'm not
gay, I'm a lesbian."

1288
01:07:34,176 --> 01:07:35,801
Exactly.

1289
01:07:35,802 --> 01:07:37,803
. My first thought was,
when I was pregnant with you,

1290
01:07:37,804 --> 01:07:38,639
what did I do?

1291
01:07:38,640 --> 01:07:39,806
Did I tilt-a-whirl?

1292
01:07:41,643 --> 01:07:43,226
Did I bungee jump?

1293
01:07:43,227 --> 01:07:44,435
- Bound For Glory?

1294
01:07:44,436 --> 01:07:46,395
- Oh, uh, the fountain.

1295
01:07:47,856 --> 01:07:48,690
- Stop it.

1296
01:07:48,690 --> 01:07:49,650
- But you didn't judge.

1297
01:07:49,651 --> 01:07:53,361
- Oh, listen, alone, late
at night, I judged plenty.

1298
01:07:53,362 --> 01:07:55,780
I judged you, I judged me.

1299
01:07:55,781 --> 01:07:58,991
I said to myself, I said:

1300
01:07:58,992 --> 01:08:01,536
"I don't understand this."

1301
01:08:01,537 --> 01:08:02,829
"What does he need?"

1302
01:08:05,582 --> 01:08:06,999
You know what made me feel good?

1303
01:08:07,000 --> 01:08:08,668
What?

1304
01:08:08,669 --> 01:08:10,419
- Summer Olympics.

1305
01:08:10,420 --> 01:08:15,424
I was watching them on
TV, feeling sorry for myself.

1306
01:08:15,425 --> 01:08:18,386
They kept showing these
parents of these girls in the pool.

1307
01:08:18,387 --> 01:08:20,138
- Synchronized swimmers.
- Exactly.

1308
01:08:21,098 --> 01:08:25,102
And the parents, they kept
crying and waving flags.

1309
01:08:26,061 --> 01:08:26,895
And I said to myself,

1310
01:08:26,896 --> 01:08:29,313
"Hey, if they can
feel proud of their kids

1311
01:08:29,314 --> 01:08:33,067
"just because they can stand
on their head in the deep end,

1312
01:08:33,068 --> 01:08:35,404
"I can feel proud of mine."
- Aw.

1313
01:08:37,030 --> 01:08:38,030
- Hey.

1314
01:08:41,618 --> 01:08:42,785
. One more, one more.
- No, come on, Ma, this...

1315
01:08:42,786 --> 01:08:45,246
- You think we're
gonna need sunscreen?

1316
01:08:45,247 --> 01:08:46,539
Over there, they.

1317
01:08:46,540 --> 01:08:47,374
- Thank you.

1318
01:08:47,375 --> 01:08:49,293
- All right.
- Good boy, good boy.

1319
01:08:54,339 --> 01:08:55,339
- Jeffrey.

1320
01:08:56,633 --> 01:08:58,677
Wow, long time no see.

1321
01:09:00,596 --> 01:09:01,596
You look great.

1322
01:09:01,597 --> 01:09:02,431
- Thanks.

1323
01:09:02,432 --> 01:09:03,514
You, too.

1324
01:09:03,515 --> 01:09:05,057
- Has anyone seen Darius?

1325
01:09:05,058 --> 01:09:08,603
I lost him somewhere
near those SandM people.

1326
01:09:08,604 --> 01:09:11,856
I swear I saw this terrifying
man wearing a dog collar,

1327
01:09:11,857 --> 01:09:14,066
harness and jackboots,
snarling at me.

1328
01:09:14,067 --> 01:09:16,527
And I look closer, and
it was my upholsterer.

1329
01:09:16,528 --> 01:09:17,695
Oh, my God.

1330
01:09:17,696 --> 01:09:19,405
- Should I get my
nipples pierced?

1331
01:09:19,406 --> 01:09:20,240
- What?

1332
01:09:20,241 --> 01:09:22,950
- I just saw this big
guy, totally naked except

1333
01:09:22,951 --> 01:09:25,953
for a jockstrap and two gold
rings, right here and here.

1334
01:09:25,954 --> 01:09:27,204
- For guest towels.

1335
01:09:28,040 --> 01:09:28,999
- What group are you guys with?

1336
01:09:29,000 --> 01:09:30,625
- Gay Men Who Need A Cigarette.

1337
01:09:30,626 --> 01:09:33,544
- Interior Designers Fight AIDS.

1338
01:09:33,545 --> 01:09:36,505
- Care With Flair.

1339
01:09:36,506 --> 01:09:37,506
- Hey.
- Oh.

1340
01:09:38,383 --> 01:09:39,425
- The Sheep Meadow.

1341
01:09:39,426 --> 01:09:41,093
- Come along,
Jeffrey, you can help.

1342
01:09:41,094 --> 01:09:42,720
- Uh, no, I'll catch up.

1343
01:09:42,721 --> 01:09:43,639
- Oh!

1344
01:09:43,639 --> 01:09:44,639
Come on.

1345
01:09:45,974 --> 01:09:46,808
I got it, Steve.

1346
01:09:46,809 --> 01:09:47,975
- Oh, thanks.

1347
01:09:47,976 --> 01:09:51,687
Hey, I know, we'll put
you on the best float

1348
01:09:51,688 --> 01:09:52,730
with the porn stars.

1349
01:09:52,731 --> 01:09:54,106
- No, no, no.

1350
01:09:54,107 --> 01:09:56,692
Actually, I'm not marching.

1351
01:09:56,693 --> 01:09:57,527
- What?

1352
01:09:57,528 --> 01:09:59,648
- Yeah, I was just taking a
shortcut through the park.

1353
01:10:00,572 --> 01:10:02,449
I kind of forgot it
was Gay Pride Day.

1354
01:10:06,078 --> 01:10:07,078
- Wee!

1355
01:10:08,246 --> 01:10:09,538
Well, I hope
this not-marching thing

1356
01:10:09,539 --> 01:10:11,457
doesn't have
anything to do with me.

1357
01:10:12,293 --> 01:10:14,335
<i>Because</i> I know I gave
you a pretty hard time.

1358
01:10:14,336 --> 01:10:15,544
No, you didn't.

1359
01:10:15,545 --> 01:10:16,545
- I tried.

1360
01:10:18,548 --> 01:10:20,342
Seriously, it's good to see you.

1361
01:10:21,593 --> 01:10:22,928
And I'm not hitting on you.

1362
01:10:24,721 --> 01:10:25,722
- And why not, hm?

1363
01:10:30,352 --> 01:10:31,352
- Jeffrey.

1364
01:10:33,230 --> 01:10:34,189
- Oh.

1365
01:10:34,189 --> 01:10:35,189
I gotta go.

1366
01:10:36,942 --> 01:10:38,193
I gotta meet somebody.

1367
01:10:39,361 --> 01:10:40,361
Pardon me?

1368
01:10:41,571 --> 01:10:42,571
- Yeah, uh...

1369
01:10:43,240 --> 01:10:45,074
My sublet, I hope.

1370
01:10:45,075 --> 01:10:46,534
- Your sublet?

1371
01:10:46,535 --> 01:10:47,827
Are you moving?

1372
01:10:47,828 --> 01:10:48,828
Where?

1373
01:10:49,830 --> 01:10:51,330
. I shouldn't
have said anything.

1374
01:10:51,331 --> 01:10:52,331
- No, come on.

1375
01:10:54,793 --> 01:10:55,793
- Back to Wisconsin.

1376
01:10:56,837 --> 01:10:58,003
Bye.

1377
01:10:58,004 --> 01:10:59,004
Wisconsin?

1378
01:10:59,005 --> 01:11:00,381
- Yeah, but not for a month.

1379
01:11:00,382 --> 01:11:02,759
Really, I gotta <i>go.</i>
- Whoa, whoa, wait a minute.

1380
01:11:03,885 --> 01:11:05,219
- Oh, Steve, it's a
good idea, really it <i>is,</i>

1381
01:11:05,220 --> 01:11:07,763
because there's no car
alarms, there's no potholes.

1382
01:11:07,764 --> 01:11:09,099
- No parades?

1383
01:11:10,475 --> 01:11:12,143
- No parades, no.
- What about Sterling?

1384
01:11:12,144 --> 01:11:13,894
What about Darius?

1385
01:11:13,895 --> 01:11:15,896
Steve Howard to Flatbed 3.

1386
01:11:15,897 --> 01:11:17,356
Steve Howard.

1387
01:11:17,357 --> 01:11:19,985
- What are you gonna
do in Wisconsin?

1388
01:11:21,987 --> 01:11:22,987
- Uh, live.

1389
01:11:24,281 --> 01:11:25,741
Breathe, hide...

1390
01:11:27,701 --> 01:11:28,827
Until it's all over.

1391
01:11:30,203 --> 01:11:32,580
- Till what's all over, Jeffrey?

1392
01:11:32,581 --> 01:11:33,581
AIDS?

1393
01:11:34,666 --> 01:11:35,666
Or your life?

1394
01:11:38,670 --> 01:11:39,670
- Either.

1395
01:11:44,176 --> 01:11:45,844
- Boy, good to
have known you, hm.

1396
01:11:46,762 --> 01:11:48,096
It was a growth experience.

1397
01:11:49,181 --> 01:11:50,931
. Come on, maybe
I'll come back, who knows?

1398
01:11:50,932 --> 01:11:51,932
Someday.

1399
01:11:54,019 --> 01:11:56,812
- You know, that's the
difference between you and me,

1400
01:11:56,813 --> 01:11:59,231
Someday.

1401
01:11:59,232 --> 01:12:00,691
A real luxury item.

1402
01:12:00,692 --> 01:12:02,443
Steve!

1403
01:12:02,444 --> 01:12:03,278
Hey.

1404
01:12:03,278 --> 01:12:04,112
- There you are.

1405
01:12:04,113 --> 01:12:05,613
- Hey.

1406
01:12:05,614 --> 01:12:06,947
Uh...

1407
01:12:06,948 --> 01:12:09,117
Sean, this is Jeffrey.

1408
01:12:10,035 --> 01:12:11,243
- Really?

1409
01:12:11,244 --> 01:12:12,078
At last.

1410
01:12:12,079 --> 01:12:13,439
I've heard way too
much about you.

1411
01:12:14,498 --> 01:12:16,874
- Uh, are you two <i>guys,</i> um...

1412
01:12:16,875 --> 01:12:17,875
- Yeah.

1413
01:12:18,919 --> 01:12:19,836
Yeah.

1414
01:12:19,836 --> 01:12:20,670
Two months, now.

1415
01:12:20,671 --> 01:12:22,129
- We met on the
parade committee.

1416
01:12:22,130 --> 01:12:24,632
Five, four, three.

1417
01:12:24,633 --> 01:12:27,844
- Hey, come here,
come here, come here.

1418
01:12:29,596 --> 01:12:31,347
. Good afternoon, this
is Chuck Farting here

1419
01:12:31,348 --> 01:12:34,433
at Manhattan's, some would
say, notorious Gay Pride march.

1420
01:12:34,434 --> 01:12:36,644
Homosexuals have made
<i>great</i> strides in recent years

1421
01:12:36,645 --> 01:12:39,021
and I am surrounded by them.

1422
01:12:39,022 --> 01:12:40,397
Are you homosexuals?

1423
01:12:40,398 --> 01:12:42,566
- Yes, Chuck, we are.

1424
01:12:42,567 --> 01:12:44,109
- Chuck!

1425
01:12:44,110 --> 01:12:45,236
Hi.

1426
01:12:45,237 --> 01:12:46,946
I love your show.

1427
01:12:46,947 --> 01:12:49,114
You are so cute.

1428
01:12:49,115 --> 01:12:50,033
Hi.

1429
01:12:50,034 --> 01:12:54,036
Hi, we're here, we're
queer and we're on TV!

1430
01:12:54,997 --> 01:12:57,165
- No, no, it is working, really.

1431
01:12:58,250 --> 01:13:00,125
- And here's a regular fellow.

1432
01:13:00,126 --> 01:13:01,752
your son, your brother,

1433
01:13:01,753 --> 01:13:02,587
the guy next door.

1434
01:13:02,588 --> 01:13:04,088
Your name?

1435
01:13:04,089 --> 01:13:05,548
- Jeffrey.

1436
01:13:05,549 --> 01:13:07,717
- And how are you
celebrating Gay Pride Day?

1437
01:13:08,844 --> 01:13:09,844
- I'm running.

1438
01:13:10,929 --> 01:13:12,805
- Provocative.
- Chuck!

1439
01:13:12,806 --> 01:13:14,181
- Chuck!
- Chuck!

1440
01:13:14,182 --> 01:13:16,058
- Well, it seems we have a
mother-and-daughter team here,

1441
01:13:16,059 --> 01:13:17,768
is that right?
- That's right.

1442
01:13:17,769 --> 01:13:18,603
- Don't ask.

1443
01:13:18,604 --> 01:13:21,063
- And what are you ladies going to do
to celebrate this Gay Pride occasion?

1444
01:13:21,064 --> 01:13:22,231
Something very special?

1445
01:13:22,232 --> 01:13:23,482
- You bet, Chuck.

1446
01:13:23,483 --> 01:13:25,025
We're gonna ride
on a flatbed truck

1447
01:13:25,026 --> 01:13:26,402
for the whole world to see.

1448
01:13:26,403 --> 01:13:27,237
Yeah, yeah.

1449
01:13:27,238 --> 01:13:30,197
- Because we are proud
of who and what we are.

1450
01:13:30,198 --> 01:13:31,032
Yeah.

1451
01:13:31,033 --> 01:13:32,075
- And after the parade?

1452
01:13:33,159 --> 01:13:35,202
- Angelique is going
to remove her penis.

1453
01:13:35,203 --> 01:13:36,787
- It's coming right off.

1454
01:13:36,788 --> 01:13:37,664
Yeah!

1455
01:14:33,470 --> 01:14:34,470
- Hey, how is he?

1456
01:14:35,764 --> 01:14:36,764
- No change.

1457
01:14:38,558 --> 01:14:39,392
- Can I see him?

1458
01:14:39,393 --> 01:14:40,559
- No.

1459
01:14:40,560 --> 01:14:41,560
He's uh...

1460
01:14:42,854 --> 01:14:45,522
He wouldn't know
who you are, or talk.

1461
01:14:45,523 --> 01:14:46,523
It's a coma.

1462
01:14:50,445 --> 01:14:51,655
- Do you need anything?

1463
01:14:52,906 --> 01:14:53,906
- No, I'm fine.

1464
01:15:03,083 --> 01:15:04,292
Where were you?

1465
01:15:05,293 --> 01:15:06,585
- Working.

1466
01:15:06,586 --> 01:15:10,590
My last job, the
Hilton, a whimper.

1467
01:15:13,969 --> 01:15:14,969
Is his mom in there?

1468
01:15:15,845 --> 01:15:18,014
- No, she's back at our
place, getting some rest.

1469
01:15:21,143 --> 01:15:22,435
He doesn't recognize anyone.

1470
01:15:24,479 --> 01:15:25,438
- Well, you never know.

1471
01:15:25,439 --> 01:15:26,815
- No, he doesn't, he's dead.

1472
01:15:29,442 --> 01:15:30,442
- What?

1473
01:15:32,195 --> 01:15:33,195
- Half an hour ago.

1474
01:15:37,200 --> 01:15:39,619
That's the first time
that I've said it out loud.

1475
01:15:43,832 --> 01:15:44,958
A brain hemorrhage.

1476
01:15:46,919 --> 01:15:48,211
That's why it was so fast.

1477
01:15:49,337 --> 01:15:51,089
These brain things.

1478
01:15:53,258 --> 01:15:56,136
That's why three weeks ago
he was marching on Fifth Avenue

1479
01:15:59,597 --> 01:16:00,639
with me.

1480
01:16:00,640 --> 01:16:01,890
Friedman.

1481
01:16:01,891 --> 01:16:02,726
Yeah.

1482
01:16:02,727 --> 01:16:03,810
Come with me.

1483
01:16:08,982 --> 01:16:09,982
- Sterling.

1484
01:16:11,693 --> 01:16:13,193
I'm so sorry.

1485
01:16:13,194 --> 01:16:14,320
- You're what?

1486
01:16:15,447 --> 01:16:16,488
You're sorry?

1487
01:16:16,489 --> 01:16:18,533
Oh, thank you,
Jeffrey, thank you.

1488
01:16:19,576 --> 01:16:20,785
Darius is dead.

1489
01:16:23,621 --> 01:16:25,373
Everyone, and I'm sorry, too.

1490
01:16:33,423 --> 01:16:34,423
I'm sorry.

1491
01:16:38,595 --> 01:16:40,346
- Is there anything
that I can do?

1492
01:16:42,849 --> 01:16:43,850
- I wasn't enough.

1493
01:16:45,310 --> 01:16:46,810
I wasn't important enough.

1494
01:16:46,811 --> 01:16:49,522
I couldn't snub it.

1495
01:16:51,691 --> 01:16:53,359
Couldn't scare
it off with a look.

1496
01:16:54,444 --> 01:16:59,365
I couldn't shield him with raw
silk and tassels and Type X.

1497
01:17:02,035 --> 01:17:03,203
The limits of style.

1498
01:17:05,330 --> 01:17:07,790
- But you loved Darius
and Darius loved you...

1499
01:17:07,791 --> 01:17:09,958
- Jesus, Jeffrey, how can you?!

1500
01:17:09,959 --> 01:17:11,043
What?

1501
01:17:11,044 --> 01:17:12,003
- You know, I don't
know why, Jeffrey,

1502
01:17:12,004 --> 01:17:14,547
I'm obviously quite out of
my mind, but right now...

1503
01:17:20,220 --> 01:17:21,220
No, I don't.

1504
01:17:22,430 --> 01:17:23,807
I don't hate you.

1505
01:17:25,475 --> 01:17:26,601
- You hate me?

1506
01:17:35,652 --> 01:17:37,486
. Jeffrey, perhaps you
should just not be here,

1507
01:17:37,487 --> 01:17:38,571
not just right now.

1508
01:17:39,572 --> 01:17:40,572
- Please, Sterling.

1509
01:17:42,242 --> 01:17:43,617
Please, please, let me help you.

1510
01:17:43,618 --> 01:17:44,452
What can I do?

1511
01:17:44,452 --> 01:17:45,370
- What can you do, Jeffrey?

1512
01:17:45,370 --> 01:17:46,204
Nothing.

1513
01:17:46,204 --> 01:17:47,038
You're leaving.

1514
01:17:47,039 --> 01:17:49,374
You're going away
to some place insane.

1515
01:17:51,417 --> 01:17:52,417
I'm sorry.

1516
01:18:07,392 --> 01:18:08,892
- I can stay for a
few more days...

1517
01:18:08,893 --> 01:18:09,893
- No!

1518
01:18:11,980 --> 01:18:12,980
Please, go.

1519
01:18:15,316 --> 01:18:16,860
You are not part of this.

1520
01:18:18,111 --> 01:18:19,654
This has nothing to do with you.

1521
01:18:27,370 --> 01:18:29,329
You know, Darius once said

1522
01:18:29,330 --> 01:18:31,624
that you were the saddest
person he ever knew.

1523
01:18:37,088 --> 01:18:38,173
- Why did he say that?

1524
01:18:39,549 --> 01:18:43,178
- Because he was sick,
because he had a fatal disease

1525
01:18:44,554 --> 01:18:46,890
and he <i>was</i> one million
times happier than you.

1526
01:18:47,765 --> 01:18:51,560
- You loved Darius
and look what happens.

1527
01:18:51,561 --> 01:18:55,231
Do you want me to go
through this with Steve?

1528
01:18:57,066 --> 01:18:58,066
- Yes.

1529
01:19:01,821 --> 01:19:02,821
- Jeffrey.

1530
01:19:04,908 --> 01:19:05,908
Guess what?

1531
01:19:06,784 --> 01:19:08,410
It's the tunnel of
light you're supposed

1532
01:19:08,411 --> 01:19:11,830
to see right before you die,
with all your dead relatives.

1533
01:19:23,384 --> 01:19:24,219
- What are you?

1534
01:19:24,220 --> 01:19:28,264
Are you some sort of
grief-induced hallucination?

1535
01:19:29,432 --> 01:19:30,891
Why did you come back?

1536
01:19:30,892 --> 01:19:32,726
- To see you.

1537
01:19:32,727 --> 01:19:35,812
I figured you got here too
late, I was already in the coma.

1538
01:19:35,813 --> 01:19:39,066
- Sweetheart, it's me!

1539
01:19:39,067 --> 01:19:40,400
Aunt Phyllis.

1540
01:19:40,401 --> 01:19:41,652
- And Uncle Barney.

1541
01:19:41,653 --> 01:19:43,403
- And Cousin Gary.

1542
01:19:43,404 --> 01:19:45,072
- You'll love it.

1543
01:19:45,073 --> 01:19:46,615
You look great.

1544
01:19:46,616 --> 01:19:49,034
Meow!

1545
01:19:49,035 --> 01:19:50,411
- Did you bring me anything?

1546
01:19:54,249 --> 01:19:55,374
- Flowers.

1547
01:19:55,375 --> 01:19:56,375
Where?

1548
01:19:57,043 --> 01:19:58,043
- I was in a hurry.

1549
01:19:59,379 --> 01:20:02,881
Look who's
here, Grandma Rose.

1550
01:20:02,882 --> 01:20:04,841
Are you married?

1551
01:20:04,842 --> 01:20:07,344
- Jeffrey, I'm dead.

1552
01:20:07,345 --> 01:20:08,345
You're not.

1553
01:20:09,555 --> 01:20:10,390
- I know that.

1554
01:20:10,390 --> 01:20:11,266
- You do?

1555
01:20:11,266 --> 01:20:12,266
Prove it.

1556
01:20:13,685 --> 01:20:14,852
- What do you mean?

1557
01:20:15,853 --> 01:20:17,312
- Go dancing.

1558
01:20:17,313 --> 01:20:18,730
- Go to a show!

1559
01:20:18,731 --> 01:20:19,731
- Make trouble.

1560
01:20:19,732 --> 01:20:21,650
- Make out.

1561
01:20:21,651 --> 01:20:24,362
- Hate AIDS, Jeffrey, not life.

1562
01:20:26,114 --> 01:20:27,114
- How?

1563
01:20:28,408 --> 01:20:32,954
. Just think of AIDS like
the guest that won't leave.

1564
01:20:33,997 --> 01:20:35,707
The one we all hate.

1565
01:20:37,375 --> 01:20:38,584
But you have to remember.

1566
01:20:39,711 --> 01:20:41,128
- What?

1567
01:20:41,129 --> 01:20:43,506
- Hey, it's still our party.

1568
01:20:50,596 --> 01:20:53,640
Darling,
they're waiting.

1569
01:20:53,641 --> 01:20:54,641
- Wait, wait!

1570
01:20:56,436 --> 01:20:57,270
Is that it?

1571
01:20:57,271 --> 01:20:58,520
Is that all you have to tell me?

1572
01:21:01,858 --> 01:21:03,400
- Be nice to Sterling.

1573
01:21:30,803 --> 01:21:33,305
♪ There will be
spring in the air ♪

1574
01:21:33,306 --> 01:21:36,058
♪ On the way to your heart ♪

1575
01:21:36,059 --> 01:21:38,643
♪ Welcome sounds everywhere ♪

1576
01:21:38,644 --> 01:21:42,856
♪ On the way to your heart ♪

1577
01:21:42,857 --> 01:21:43,691
♪ And the looks can arise ♪

1578
01:21:44,610 --> 01:21:45,776
Hi, Steve.

1579
01:21:45,777 --> 01:21:47,319
Hi.

1580
01:21:47,320 --> 01:21:48,279
Are you there?

1581
01:21:48,280 --> 01:21:51,031
Or are you screening your calls?

1582
01:21:51,032 --> 01:21:55,535
Uh, listen, it's Jeffrey,
and I'm not in Wisconsin.

1583
01:21:55,536 --> 01:21:58,247
I'm not a complete asshole.

1584
01:21:59,248 --> 01:22:00,374
I have to see you.

1585
01:22:00,375 --> 01:22:01,542
It's an emergency.

1586
01:22:02,752 --> 01:22:05,587
10:00 tonight at the
Essex House, please.

1587
01:22:07,048 --> 01:22:11,843
♪ How did I happen to
lose my way on the way... ♪

1588
01:22:11,844 --> 01:22:14,262
Jeffrey?

1589
01:22:14,263 --> 01:22:15,098
♪ To your heart ♪

1590
01:22:15,098 --> 01:22:15,932
Jeffrey.

1591
01:22:15,933 --> 01:22:17,432
Monsieur.

1592
01:22:17,433 --> 01:22:18,643
What?

1593
01:22:20,019 --> 01:22:21,478
All right, what's going on?

1594
01:22:21,479 --> 01:22:22,814
You said it was important.

1595
01:22:29,612 --> 01:22:31,196
- Table for two?

1596
01:22:31,197 --> 01:22:32,197
Excuse me?

1597
01:22:35,660 --> 01:22:37,020
Didn't
we have a date?

1598
01:22:40,456 --> 01:22:41,957
Oh, my God.

1599
01:22:41,958 --> 01:22:42,958
- Ugh!

1600
01:22:44,419 --> 01:22:45,544
Well, I didn't think you'd come.

1601
01:22:45,545 --> 01:22:47,212
When I left the
message, I didn't know

1602
01:22:47,213 --> 01:22:48,965
if John would let you.

1603
01:22:50,758 --> 01:22:51,717
Sean.

1604
01:22:51,718 --> 01:22:52,926
- Dump him.

1605
01:22:52,927 --> 01:22:54,052
What?

1606
01:22:54,053 --> 01:22:54,887
- Just tell him it's over.

1607
01:22:54,888 --> 01:22:56,347
Be really mean.

1608
01:22:57,265 --> 01:22:59,266
It's a little
too late for that.

1609
01:22:59,267 --> 01:23:00,267
- Why?

1610
01:23:01,436 --> 01:23:02,645
Sean dumped me.

1611
01:23:03,563 --> 01:23:04,397
- He did?

1612
01:23:04,398 --> 01:23:05,439
Really?

1613
01:23:05,440 --> 01:23:06,898
He couldn't take it.

1614
01:23:06,899 --> 01:23:07,941
The sex.

1615
01:23:07,942 --> 01:23:09,359
He was exhausted.

1616
01:23:09,360 --> 01:23:10,194
He's 22.

1617
01:23:10,195 --> 01:23:11,946
- Were you upset?
- Of course.

1618
01:23:13,322 --> 01:23:14,490
- A whole bunch?

1619
01:23:15,992 --> 01:23:17,410
. Goodbye, Jeffrey.
- Steve.

1620
01:23:18,411 --> 01:23:23,081
If I asked you to,
could we have sex?

1621
01:23:23,082 --> 01:23:26,878
Safe sex, some
kind of sex, tonight?

1622
01:23:28,838 --> 01:23:29,838
- What?

1623
01:23:31,048 --> 01:23:33,259
You are really unbelievable.

1624
01:23:40,057 --> 01:23:41,267
What is this, Jeffrey?

1625
01:23:43,269 --> 01:23:45,520
What, you think
it'<i>s so</i> easy, huh?

1626
01:23:45,521 --> 01:23:48,566
You just leave a
message, rent a tuxedo.

1627
01:23:50,443 --> 01:23:52,278
I am still HIV positive.

1628
01:23:53,404 --> 01:23:55,906
So?

1629
01:23:55,907 --> 01:23:56,907
- So?

1630
01:23:58,534 --> 01:24:01,162
So it doesn't go away, Jeffrey.

1631
01:24:02,455 --> 01:24:04,206
It only gets worse.

1632
01:24:04,207 --> 01:24:05,207
I know.

1633
01:24:06,918 --> 01:24:09,086
- Don't do this, don't
even, you fucker!

1634
01:24:10,046 --> 01:24:13,798
Don't you pretend, because
I will not be your good deed.

1635
01:24:13,799 --> 01:24:16,051
- You're not, you're
not, I'm too selfish.

1636
01:24:16,052 --> 01:24:17,594
I don't want a red ribbon.

1637
01:24:17,595 --> 01:24:19,972
- Oh, I am touched!
- I want you.

1638
01:24:23,476 --> 01:24:24,977
- Say we have sex.

1639
01:24:27,146 --> 01:24:28,146
Say we like it.

1640
01:24:29,273 --> 01:24:31,024
And say tomorrow
morning you decide

1641
01:24:31,025 --> 01:24:32,150
to take off for Wisconsin?

1642
01:24:32,151 --> 01:24:34,444
- I won't.
- How do I know that?

1643
01:24:34,445 --> 01:24:35,488
- Because I am...

1644
01:24:38,699 --> 01:24:39,699
I'm a gay man.

1645
01:24:41,494 --> 01:24:45,331
And I live in this city, and I
am not an innocent bystander.

1646
01:24:46,374 --> 01:24:47,374
Not anymore.

1647
01:25:00,513 --> 01:25:01,597
- So...

1648
01:25:07,103 --> 01:25:08,562
How bad do you want it?

1649
01:25:08,563 --> 01:25:10,063
- Oh.

1650
01:25:13,776 --> 01:25:14,776
Find out.

1651
01:25:16,153 --> 01:25:18,071
- This is nice.

1652
01:25:18,072 --> 01:25:19,573
You want it.

1653
01:25:19,574 --> 01:25:21,199
Suddenly, it's my decision.

1654
01:25:21,200 --> 01:25:22,993
I get to be Jeffrey.

1655
01:25:22,994 --> 01:25:24,995
- Oh, fuck you.

1656
01:25:24,996 --> 01:25:26,288
- Maybe.

1657
01:25:29,500 --> 01:25:30,500
Maybe?

1658
01:25:31,544 --> 01:25:34,838
- I think you
should woo me first.

1659
01:25:34,839 --> 01:25:36,256
Dinner.

1660
01:25:36,257 --> 01:25:37,967
Maybe dancing.

1661
01:25:39,468 --> 01:25:43,555
And then...
- Unbelievably hot sex.

1662
01:25:43,556 --> 01:25:44,390
- Not yet.

1663
01:25:44,390 --> 01:25:45,390
- Oh, come on, what...

1664
01:25:46,851 --> 01:25:47,851
What do you want?

1665
01:25:49,437 --> 01:25:50,437
- Jewelry.

1666
01:25:51,606 --> 01:25:52,606
- Yes!

1667
01:25:55,985 --> 01:25:56,985
- Yes.

1668
01:26:00,114 --> 01:26:01,364
Yes?

1669
01:26:07,622 --> 01:26:08,622
- Yes.

1670
01:26:12,710 --> 01:26:13,753
- But, Steve,

1671
01:26:16,631 --> 01:26:18,798
first you have to
promise me something.

1672
01:26:23,763 --> 01:26:24,763
- What?

1673
01:26:26,432 --> 01:26:30,144
- Promise me that
you will not get sick.

1674
01:26:34,398 --> 01:26:35,398
- Done.

1675
01:26:37,777 --> 01:26:39,153
- And you will not die.

1676
01:26:43,491 --> 01:26:44,491
- Never.

1677
01:26:49,163 --> 01:26:50,163
- Liar.

1678
01:27:00,091 --> 01:27:02,968
- Jesus, we really
shouldn't do this.

1679
01:27:06,597 --> 01:27:07,764
We're really asking for it.

1680
01:27:07,765 --> 01:27:09,265
And you give me one good reason.

1681
01:27:09,266 --> 01:27:11,768
One good reason why
we even have a prayer.

1682
01:27:11,769 --> 01:27:13,853
- One, one good reason?
- I do.

1683
01:27:23,656 --> 01:27:25,073
- I dare you.

1684
01:28:08,743 --> 01:28:12,996
♪ Someday, I know,
he'll smile hello ♪

1685
01:28:12,997 --> 01:28:17,417
♪ A warm welcome will be ♪

1686
01:28:17,418 --> 01:28:21,671
♪ I'm looking for someone ♪

1687
01:28:21,672 --> 01:28:26,009
♪ Someone who's looking for me ♪

1688
01:28:26,010 --> 01:28:30,388
♪ Standing there
we'll learn to kiss ♪

1689
01:28:30,389 --> 01:28:34,768
♪ In fact it really leads ♪

1690
01:28:34,769 --> 01:28:39,189
♪ I'm looking for someone ♪

1691
01:28:39,190 --> 01:28:43,610
♪ Someone who's looking for me ♪

1692
01:28:43,611 --> 01:28:47,822
♪ We will walk as
if were on wings ♪

1693
01:28:47,823 --> 01:28:52,285
♪ When a breathless
moment arrives ♪

1694
01:28:52,286 --> 01:28:56,623
♪ Talk over little
intimate things ♪

1695
01:28:56,624 --> 01:29:01,085
♪ As though we've known
each other all our lives ♪

1696
01:29:01,086 --> 01:29:05,298
♪ Some sweet day
you'll come my way ♪

1697
01:29:05,299 --> 01:29:09,803
♪ The one I'm longing to see ♪

1698
01:29:09,804 --> 01:29:14,140
♪ I'm looking for someone ♪

1699
01:29:14,141 --> 01:29:18,520
♪ Someone who's looking ♪

1700
01:29:18,521 --> 01:29:22,106
♪ Someone who's looking for me ♪

1701
01:29:22,107 --> 01:29:30,107
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1702
01:29:48,926 --> 01:29:52,470
♪ I tried so hard
to ignore this pain ♪

1703
01:29:52,471 --> 01:29:56,349
♪ Cos I don't want
my love to be in vain ♪

1704
01:29:56,350 --> 01:30:00,645
♪ Such a simple thing
to avoid me now ♪

1705
01:30:00,646 --> 01:30:05,108
♪ You walked in my life
and I can't let you out ♪

1706
01:30:05,109 --> 01:30:08,069
♪ I'd be so helpless
without you ♪

1707
01:30:08,070 --> 01:30:13,032
♪ Wouldn't know how to
carry my whole life through ♪

1708
01:30:13,033 --> 01:30:17,036
♪ From this day on
I will never forget ♪

1709
01:30:17,037 --> 01:30:21,791
♪ All this time, like the
first night we spent ♪

1710
01:30:21,792 --> 01:30:27,380
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1711
01:30:27,381 --> 01:30:29,799
♪ No, I don't know what to do ♪

1712
01:30:29,800 --> 01:30:36,472
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1713
01:30:36,473 --> 01:30:40,184
♪ I'd be lost without
something to cling to ♪

1714
01:30:40,185 --> 01:30:44,188
♪ Cos there's no one else
who loves me like you do ♪

1715
01:30:44,189 --> 01:30:48,610
♪ Such a wicked spell
that you're giving me ♪

1716
01:30:48,611 --> 01:30:52,822
♪ I never thought this is
the way that it would be ♪

1717
01:30:52,823 --> 01:30:55,950
♪ I'd be so helpless
without you ♪

1718
01:30:55,951 --> 01:31:00,914
♪ Wouldn't know how to
carry my whole life through ♪

1719
01:31:00,915 --> 01:31:04,834
♪ From this day on
I will never forget ♪

1720
01:31:04,835 --> 01:31:09,589
♪ All this time, like the
first night we spent ♪

1721
01:31:09,590 --> 01:31:17,590
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1722
01:31:19,808 --> 01:31:21,726
♪ I don't know what to do ♪

1723
01:31:21,727 --> 01:31:27,440
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1724
01:31:27,441 --> 01:31:29,525
♪ Not without you ♪

1725
01:31:29,526 --> 01:31:37,526
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1726
01:31:39,078 --> 01:31:41,579
♪ No, I don't know what to do ♪

1727
01:31:41,580 --> 01:31:47,085
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1728
01:31:47,086 --> 01:31:49,504
♪ No, I don't know what to do ♪

1729
01:31:49,505 --> 01:31:54,926
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1730
01:31:54,927 --> 01:31:57,553
♪ No, I don't know what to do ♪

1731
01:31:57,554 --> 01:32:00,348
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1732
01:32:00,349 --> 01:32:05,312
♪ I will never ever find
another love like you ♪

1733
01:32:05,521 --> 01:32:12,568
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1734
01:33:17,426 --> 01:33:25,426
♪ I don't know what
to do without you ♪

1735
01:33:32,649 --> 01:33:40,649
♪ That's what you do ♪