1 00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:05,371 - Okay, so tomorrow, don't forget. 2 00:00:05,373 --> 00:00:07,406 You're picking them up, right? 3 00:00:11,644 --> 00:00:14,747 It's as if I speak in tongues. 4 00:00:14,749 --> 00:00:17,316 Don't tell me you forgot about tomorrow. 5 00:00:17,318 --> 00:00:20,452 - I won't. 6 00:00:20,454 --> 00:00:22,154 - Do you have any interest in your children? 7 00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:23,455 - Yes. 8 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:24,757 Yes, and tomorrow... 9 00:00:24,759 --> 00:00:26,258 I pick them up. 10 00:00:26,260 --> 00:00:27,559 - From where? 11 00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:30,763 - You don't know? 12 00:00:30,765 --> 00:00:34,233 - Pick them up from their school... 13 00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:36,802 - Prayer. - Rehearsal... 14 00:00:36,804 --> 00:00:38,670 At the... 15 00:00:38,672 --> 00:00:40,739 - Steak house? 16 00:00:40,741 --> 00:00:42,408 - Auditorium. 17 00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:44,043 Be there by 3:00. 18 00:00:44,045 --> 00:00:46,045 Sarah knows you're going to pick them up. 19 00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:47,346 - Sarah? 20 00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:50,215 - Their teacher! You are incredible! 21 00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:52,418 - Sarah! I know it's sarah, okay? 22 00:00:52,420 --> 00:00:54,386 I was kidding you. I know it's sarah. 23 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:58,323 - Yeah, you know it's sarah. 24 00:00:59,692 --> 00:01:04,329 Ray, what's my middle name? 25 00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:11,804 Come on, ray. What's my middle name? 26 00:01:14,174 --> 00:01:17,276 - Sexy. 27 00:01:26,486 --> 00:01:30,189 - [sniffs] 28 00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:33,225 Dad, you wearing aftershave? 29 00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,461 - Yeah. 30 00:01:35,463 --> 00:01:37,329 - It doesn't look like you shaved. 31 00:01:37,331 --> 00:01:41,767 - I didn't shower either. Hence the aftershave. 32 00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:47,773 - Nice try. 33 00:01:47,775 --> 00:01:50,476 - Oh. What are you guys doing here? 34 00:01:50,478 --> 00:01:52,478 - Watching the knicks on the dish. 35 00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:55,848 - And holding our breath. - Great. 36 00:01:55,850 --> 00:01:57,382 Hey, no, guys, get off the lawn. 37 00:01:57,384 --> 00:01:58,717 Guys, go upstairs. 38 00:01:58,719 --> 00:02:00,152 Come on, change. You got to change, like we said. 39 00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:06,158 [boys yelling] 40 00:02:10,530 --> 00:02:13,799 - What are you doing to these kids? 41 00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:15,334 - They're in a play. 42 00:02:15,336 --> 00:02:19,404 - Let me guess, "death of a salesman." 43 00:02:19,406 --> 00:02:21,673 - Just this thing at school. That's all. 44 00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:22,908 - A play? That's a mistake. 45 00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:25,577 Get them into sports, quick. 46 00:02:25,579 --> 00:02:27,679 - Look, it's a couple of weeks, that's all. 47 00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:28,881 The whole class is in it. 48 00:02:28,883 --> 00:02:30,716 - I don't like it. 49 00:02:30,718 --> 00:02:34,286 Look at them running around here like a couple of sissies. 50 00:02:34,288 --> 00:02:35,487 - They're not sissies. 51 00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:36,755 - No? - No. 52 00:02:36,757 --> 00:02:40,225 - Well, then what the hell are they? 53 00:02:40,227 --> 00:02:43,362 - They're fairies. 54 00:02:43,364 --> 00:02:47,232 - Oh, my god! 55 00:02:47,234 --> 00:02:49,902 I'm telling ya, sports, quick, right now! 56 00:02:49,904 --> 00:02:52,571 Tennis, even! 57 00:02:52,573 --> 00:02:53,805 - No, no! 58 00:02:53,807 --> 00:02:55,841 Look, these are the parts 59 00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:57,342 That they were assigned, all right? 60 00:02:57,344 --> 00:02:59,244 That's it. It's no big deal. 61 00:02:59,246 --> 00:03:02,181 - Well, listen to the king of the fairies. 62 00:03:04,951 --> 00:03:06,518 - Hi. - Hey. 63 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,954 - I took debra grocery shopping. 64 00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:12,824 Now she knows how to choose a cut of meat. 65 00:03:12,826 --> 00:03:15,794 - And humiliate a butcher. 66 00:03:15,796 --> 00:03:18,263 - We should go shopping together more often. 67 00:03:18,265 --> 00:03:22,701 - Yeah, I'll call you. 68 00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:24,236 - The next time you're out, you should get 69 00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:25,804 A couple of skirts for your twins there. 70 00:03:25,806 --> 00:03:27,472 - What? 71 00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:28,674 - Dad's mad 'cause the boys are fairies 72 00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:30,242 In the school play. 73 00:03:30,244 --> 00:03:33,745 - Oh, they'll make adorable fairies. 74 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:36,648 - Well, they already do. 75 00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:38,917 You should have seen them in the little wings. 76 00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:41,587 - Somebody just kill me. 77 00:03:41,589 --> 00:03:43,855 - Oh, frank, come on. 78 00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:44,856 - Look, don't listen to him. 79 00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:46,425 He did the same thing to me 80 00:03:46,427 --> 00:03:47,926 When I joined the chorus in the seventh grade. 81 00:03:47,928 --> 00:03:50,462 You know, I was basso profundo. 82 00:03:50,464 --> 00:03:56,335 [singing] old man river 83 00:03:56,337 --> 00:03:57,502 - All right! 84 00:03:57,504 --> 00:04:01,340 - [singing] that old man river 85 00:04:01,342 --> 00:04:06,645 He must know somethin' 86 00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:10,682 He don't say nothin' 87 00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,684 - All right! 88 00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:15,320 All right, all right! Enough! 89 00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:16,788 That's how it starts! 90 00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:17,990 - What? 91 00:04:17,992 --> 00:04:19,658 - Singing, dancing. 92 00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:24,630 - Showering regularly. 93 00:04:24,632 --> 00:04:28,033 - Why don't you go hang some drapes? 94 00:04:28,035 --> 00:04:30,469 - Oh, stop it, frank. 95 00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:33,405 I was so sad when he quit chorus. 96 00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:36,742 - I had to. Everyone was making fun of me. 97 00:04:36,744 --> 00:04:38,377 - That's why you quit? 98 00:04:38,379 --> 00:04:40,946 I don't remember anybody making fun of you. 99 00:04:40,948 --> 00:04:44,283 - Dad told me people were making fun of me. 100 00:04:44,285 --> 00:04:46,018 - What people? Who? 101 00:04:46,020 --> 00:04:47,653 - People. 102 00:04:47,655 --> 00:04:48,987 - What people? 103 00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:53,592 - People... Within the community. 104 00:04:53,594 --> 00:04:57,296 - It was just you, wasn't it, dad? 105 00:04:57,298 --> 00:05:00,465 - I represent the community. 106 00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:02,000 Oh, who cares? 107 00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:03,869 The next day I put up the basketball hoop. 108 00:05:03,871 --> 00:05:05,304 Before you know it, 109 00:05:05,306 --> 00:05:06,872 You had a shelf full of trophies. 110 00:05:06,874 --> 00:05:08,307 By the way, when are you 111 00:05:08,309 --> 00:05:10,642 Going to get that crap out of my house? 112 00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,878 - Yeah, dad needs that space 113 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:17,082 For his "father of the year" awards. 114 00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:18,583 - What, are you cracking wise? 115 00:05:18,585 --> 00:05:20,986 My hard work is the only reason 116 00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:22,854 The two of you aren't flitting around here 117 00:05:22,856 --> 00:05:26,325 Like a couple of tinkerbells. 118 00:05:26,327 --> 00:05:30,429 Even so, you're still a "bachelor." 119 00:05:30,431 --> 00:05:31,797 - Don't be ridiculous. 120 00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:33,598 - Yeah, frank, dressing the twins like fairies 121 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,467 Is not going to make them gay. 122 00:05:35,469 --> 00:05:40,605 - Well, it's not going to make them teamsters. 123 00:05:42,642 --> 00:05:46,812 - I'm sure there are gay teamsters. 124 00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:52,751 - You, madam, are ignorant. 125 00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:54,086 - Oh, please. 126 00:05:54,088 --> 00:05:55,787 This won't make them gay. 127 00:05:55,789 --> 00:05:57,789 And even if it does, it's fine. 128 00:05:57,791 --> 00:06:00,525 It's better than fine; it's wonderful. 129 00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:03,028 Who cares what they are so long as they're happy? 130 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:07,132 You know what? I hope they do turn gay. 131 00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:10,502 - You're just saying that to make me mad! 132 00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:12,037 - And why are you mad? 133 00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:14,072 You think that's the worst thing that could happen? 134 00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:15,741 Them turning out like you 135 00:06:15,743 --> 00:06:19,378 Is the worst thing that could happen. 136 00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:22,013 - So everyone's fine with all of this. 137 00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:23,849 Huh? 138 00:06:23,851 --> 00:06:24,983 What about you? 139 00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:26,852 - What about me? 140 00:06:26,854 --> 00:06:28,954 - You're fine with your sons dressing up like fairies 141 00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:30,756 For all of long island to see? 142 00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:33,525 - First of all, it's not in front 143 00:06:33,527 --> 00:06:35,394 Of all long island, okay? 144 00:06:35,396 --> 00:06:38,430 There's 40 people in the school's cafe-gym-atorium, 145 00:06:38,432 --> 00:06:39,598 All right? 146 00:06:44,637 --> 00:06:46,705 Second of all, do you hear yourself? 147 00:06:46,707 --> 00:06:48,907 Aren't you embarrassed to talk that way? 148 00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,142 - What way? 149 00:06:50,144 --> 00:06:52,611 - You know, your old stupid ideas 150 00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:54,146 That you and your lodge buddies 151 00:06:54,148 --> 00:06:58,450 Sit around and laugh at between bouts of gas. 152 00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:04,489 - Don't say nothing about my lodge buddies! 153 00:07:04,491 --> 00:07:08,493 - Who, the guys you swim naked with? 154 00:07:10,630 --> 00:07:12,697 - That's lodge policy! 155 00:07:12,699 --> 00:07:15,600 - Yeah, all right. 156 00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,002 Is it-- is it lodge policy 157 00:07:17,004 --> 00:07:19,004 To force your opinions on other people? 158 00:07:19,006 --> 00:07:20,639 Look, dad, they're my kids, all right? 159 00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:22,174 I'll raise them the way I want to raise them. 160 00:07:22,176 --> 00:07:23,909 And what is that smell? 161 00:07:26,979 --> 00:07:32,918 - He didn't shower today, so he used my jean nate. 162 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,053 - What? 163 00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:39,157 - You never look at what you're picking up in there. 164 00:07:39,159 --> 00:07:41,526 - Really? You're wearing perfume, dad? 165 00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:47,499 - Shut up. 166 00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:49,234 - You do smell purty, pa. 167 00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:06,885 - Well, I'm not so sure I like the way 168 00:08:06,887 --> 00:08:09,788 I'm being treated here. 169 00:08:09,790 --> 00:08:12,757 If any of you want to apologize to me, 170 00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:14,926 I'll be in the bath. 171 00:08:16,796 --> 00:08:20,532 - Who's going to apologize to the tub? 172 00:08:22,635 --> 00:08:24,936 - Oh, you made him so angry, raymond. 173 00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:28,707 - Eh. - You should do that more often. 174 00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:30,575 - I'm proud of you, honey. 175 00:08:30,577 --> 00:08:32,978 - Yeah, well, you know, it's enough already. 176 00:08:32,980 --> 00:08:34,246 - Oh, I know. 177 00:08:34,248 --> 00:08:35,747 You know, I'll tell you, 178 00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:37,549 Frank would probably have been happier 179 00:08:37,551 --> 00:08:39,651 If I'd signed the kids up to run the tape recorder. 180 00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:41,953 - What do you mean, sign them up? 181 00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:45,690 - Yeah, I signed them up. 182 00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:48,126 - Well, what do you mean, you volunteered them 183 00:08:48,128 --> 00:08:50,562 To be fairies? - Yeah. 184 00:08:53,165 --> 00:08:55,800 - Why? 185 00:08:55,802 --> 00:08:56,935 - 'cause I thought it would be cute 186 00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:58,203 To see them wear sparkly outfits 187 00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:01,706 And get a chance to dance. 188 00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:04,209 - Do they have wands? I could make them wands. 189 00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:06,177 - Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. 190 00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:07,812 You made them fairies 191 00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:10,715 When there was an opening at tape recorder? 192 00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:12,284 - Yeah. 193 00:09:12,286 --> 00:09:14,085 - Well, why would you do that? 194 00:09:14,087 --> 00:09:16,087 - What are you talking about? 195 00:09:16,089 --> 00:09:17,989 You said you were fine with it. 196 00:09:17,991 --> 00:09:19,891 - I'm not saying that I'm not fine with it, all right? 197 00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:21,059 I am. I'm fine with it. 198 00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:23,128 - You don't sound fine with it. 199 00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:24,829 - Well, that's 'cause I didn't know that we had a choice. 200 00:09:24,831 --> 00:09:26,598 I didn't know that you pushed them into this. 201 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:27,966 - I didn't push them. 202 00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:29,167 I thought they would like it, and they do. 203 00:09:29,169 --> 00:09:30,602 They're having fun. 204 00:09:30,604 --> 00:09:32,771 - Wh--fun? They're five, okay? 205 00:09:32,773 --> 00:09:34,072 They have fun with the empty roll 206 00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:36,741 From the toilet paper. 207 00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:38,810 - Why are you getting so upset? 208 00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:41,179 You know, you're sounding like your father. 209 00:09:41,181 --> 00:09:43,748 - I'm not my father, okay? This is not about that. 210 00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,350 This is about you making decisions 211 00:09:45,352 --> 00:09:48,587 For our children that don't involve... 212 00:09:48,589 --> 00:09:51,890 Their free will. 213 00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:54,125 - Oh, so you're worried about their free will. 214 00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:57,162 - [chuckles] no, he's not. 215 00:09:58,864 --> 00:10:00,699 - Why are you still here? 216 00:10:00,701 --> 00:10:03,602 - Free will. 217 00:10:07,807 --> 00:10:09,641 - Maybe you're more like your father than you think. 218 00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:12,711 - Hey, look, I am not prejudiced. 219 00:10:12,713 --> 00:10:14,646 - You just don't want your boys to be fairies. 220 00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:15,747 - Listen to me. 221 00:10:15,749 --> 00:10:17,349 If my children come home and say, 222 00:10:17,351 --> 00:10:20,251 "hey, dad, we decided to be fairies in the school play," 223 00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:21,886 I'd say, "hey, good for you, guys. 224 00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:23,021 Good, guys. Let's go have a root beer." 225 00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:24,356 Huh? All right? 226 00:10:24,358 --> 00:10:26,758 My father doesn't do that, all right? 227 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:28,994 I'm not my father. What? 228 00:10:28,996 --> 00:10:30,829 - You're going to give them a root beer. 229 00:10:30,831 --> 00:10:32,864 - Yes, that's right. I'm going to--yes. 230 00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:35,266 - You know what? You are worse than your father 231 00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:36,801 Because at least he's up front with it. 232 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:38,136 I mean, you pretend to be liberal, 233 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,371 But the truth is, you're embarrassed 234 00:10:39,373 --> 00:10:41,339 That your boys are playing fairies. 235 00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:42,340 - [coughs] bull's-eye. 236 00:10:42,342 --> 00:10:44,976 - Hey, shut up. 237 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:48,980 All right, just shut up. 238 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:51,783 - I tried to make raymond sensitive, debra. 239 00:10:51,785 --> 00:10:53,852 - Ma, don't you start, okay? 240 00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:57,022 - I took you to museums, and I gave you piano lessons. 241 00:10:57,024 --> 00:11:00,692 And I even had his hair cut at my beauty parlor, 242 00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:02,994 But there's still some of his father in him. 243 00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:06,064 - He got the moron gene. 244 00:11:08,934 --> 00:11:10,168 - Well, I'm going to stop it 245 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,936 Before it gets to michael and geoffrey. 246 00:11:11,938 --> 00:11:13,371 - You see? That's exactly what I'm talking about. 247 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:14,873 Who says that you get to make 248 00:11:14,875 --> 00:11:16,241 All the decisions in this house, huh? 249 00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:18,343 You know, they're my boys too, all right? 250 00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:19,344 Why don't you worry a little bit more 251 00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:20,412 About the girl? 252 00:11:20,414 --> 00:11:24,215 - Ally. - I know her name! 253 00:11:24,217 --> 00:11:25,417 And you know what? 254 00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:26,985 As far as the boys are concerned, 255 00:11:26,987 --> 00:11:29,087 Maybe there's such a thing as too liberal, 256 00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:31,389 Miss hippie go free-free. 257 00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:45,270 Michael, geoffrey, come on down here. 258 00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:47,238 - Hey, what's going on? 259 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:48,406 - Don't--don't you worry. - What are you doing? 260 00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,175 - Bah-bah, bah-bah, bah. I got it. 261 00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:51,843 Guys, come here. 262 00:11:51,845 --> 00:11:54,846 Listen, daddy pulled a few strings here, 263 00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:56,815 And he got you better parts in the play. 264 00:11:56,817 --> 00:11:58,983 Okay? All right? 265 00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:01,486 Now, here are your new costumes. 266 00:12:11,831 --> 00:12:15,266 - They're rocks? 267 00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:17,335 - No, boulders! 268 00:12:17,337 --> 00:12:19,270 These are great parts, guys, huh? 269 00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:20,438 Best parts in the whole play. 270 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,108 The mighty boulders! 271 00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:25,310 You didn't even tell them that they could be boulders. 272 00:12:25,312 --> 00:12:26,945 - So what do they do? 273 00:12:26,947 --> 00:12:30,348 - They--they guard the entrance to the castle. 274 00:12:30,350 --> 00:12:31,850 - Do they have lines? 275 00:12:31,852 --> 00:12:33,451 - No, but here's the thing, guys. 276 00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:36,154 You know--you know the part where the prince comes home, 277 00:12:36,156 --> 00:12:38,323 Weary from his long journey? 278 00:12:38,325 --> 00:12:39,924 Well, he's going to come over. 279 00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:41,760 He's going to rest on one of you guys. 280 00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:43,228 And then while he's resting on one of you guys, 281 00:12:43,230 --> 00:12:45,764 He puts his knapsack right on the other guy, 282 00:12:45,766 --> 00:12:49,868 And it's a heavy knapsack, but you are a boulder! 283 00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:54,005 - So they just sit there? 284 00:12:54,007 --> 00:12:57,242 - Only for the whole play. 285 00:12:57,244 --> 00:12:59,778 It's a good part; it's great, and they're perfect for it. 286 00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:00,912 Come on, let's try them on, guys. 287 00:13:00,914 --> 00:13:02,547 Sit down. Sit down. 288 00:13:02,549 --> 00:13:05,984 Okay. Sit, sit. 289 00:13:09,922 --> 00:13:14,793 Aw, you look awesome! 290 00:13:14,795 --> 00:13:16,294 I'm proud of you guys. 291 00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:18,296 - Ray, you made them scenery. 292 00:13:27,039 --> 00:13:28,406 - How you guys doing in there? 293 00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:29,440 - I'm scared! 294 00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:31,176 - Me too. 295 00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:32,977 - Okay, come on. Come on. 296 00:13:32,979 --> 00:13:36,548 That's enough for today, all right? 297 00:13:36,550 --> 00:13:38,416 Maybe we'll, uh, poke a few holes in there 298 00:13:38,418 --> 00:13:42,153 For light and air. 299 00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:44,856 - Daddy, can I put my wings on? 300 00:13:44,858 --> 00:13:46,224 - Well, actually, daddy's got to bring 301 00:13:46,226 --> 00:13:48,226 The wings back to school now. 302 00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:51,896 - I like my wings. - Me too. 303 00:13:51,898 --> 00:13:54,332 - But rocks don't have wings. 304 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:55,600 Huh? 305 00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:58,436 And if you're a rock, you get-- 306 00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:01,005 You're going to be smooth and cool, 307 00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:02,574 Which will come in real handy later 308 00:14:02,576 --> 00:14:05,844 With the ladies. 309 00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:09,414 You're smooth. You're cool. 310 00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:10,882 - I want to be a fairy. 311 00:14:10,884 --> 00:14:12,350 - Me too. 312 00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:14,052 - Well, listen, 313 00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:16,321 Maybe miss sarah will let you have candy 314 00:14:16,323 --> 00:14:17,388 Under there. 315 00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:19,357 - Ray, take them back. 316 00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:21,526 - How would you guys like a puppy under there? 317 00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:23,328 - Ray. - All right! 318 00:14:29,134 --> 00:14:30,869 Miss sarah. 319 00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,971 - Oh, hi, mr. Barone. Did you bring the wings back? 320 00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:34,439 - Yeah. - I need the wings. 321 00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:37,041 - Well, um, here's the thing. 322 00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:40,011 The rock idea really didn't fly. 323 00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:41,179 - But I thought you said 324 00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:43,615 Your boys dreamed of being rocks. 325 00:14:43,617 --> 00:14:47,051 - Ah, kids and their dreams, 326 00:14:47,053 --> 00:14:49,220 But, you know, I think it would be okay 327 00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:51,189 If they just went back to being fairies. 328 00:14:51,191 --> 00:14:52,423 - Oh, actually, I've already got 329 00:14:52,425 --> 00:14:53,424 Two new fairies. 330 00:14:53,426 --> 00:14:54,893 I'm sorry. 331 00:14:54,895 --> 00:14:56,594 - Oh, well, you know what? 332 00:14:56,596 --> 00:14:59,230 How about--you could have four fairies, you know? 333 00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,432 Two over there, a couple more over there. 334 00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:03,234 For my money, you can never have too many fairies. 335 00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:04,969 - You know what? 336 00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:07,038 Maybe your boys would like to work behind the scenes. 337 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,040 They could help josh with the tape recorder. 338 00:15:09,042 --> 00:15:10,541 - Uh, well, you know, the thing is, 339 00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:13,444 They--they actually kind of want to be fairies. 340 00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:14,913 - Well, to be honest with you, 341 00:15:14,915 --> 00:15:17,315 I'm not so sure michael and geoffrey 342 00:15:17,317 --> 00:15:20,018 Are quite cut out to be fairies. 343 00:15:20,020 --> 00:15:22,186 - What do you mean? 344 00:15:22,188 --> 00:15:23,388 - Well, they were having some problems 345 00:15:23,390 --> 00:15:25,556 Following the choreography. 346 00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:28,693 - Really? They looked good from what I saw. 347 00:15:28,695 --> 00:15:31,129 - Actually, they-- no. 348 00:15:31,131 --> 00:15:32,597 [clears throat] 349 00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:35,066 They just kind of run around, 350 00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:38,002 And I can't seem to get them to follow the music. 351 00:15:38,004 --> 00:15:39,270 - Well, maybe they just need 352 00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,705 A little more practice, that's all. 353 00:15:40,707 --> 00:15:42,440 - Well, we've been rehearsing for a week. 354 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:45,176 They just don't seem to have the proper coordination. 355 00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:46,644 I'm sorry. 356 00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:48,212 Oh, okay, let's see the first light cue 357 00:15:48,214 --> 00:15:49,547 For the prince's entrance. 358 00:15:49,549 --> 00:15:51,316 - Wait, you're joking, right? 359 00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:52,984 'cause my boys, they're coordinated. 360 00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:54,652 You know, I play ball with them. You should see them. 361 00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:56,554 They run, they catch, they hit it. 362 00:15:56,556 --> 00:15:58,323 - Yeah, I'm sure they're great at sports, 363 00:15:58,325 --> 00:16:00,725 But this is just a little more complicated. 364 00:16:01,994 --> 00:16:04,262 - What, dancing? 365 00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:06,965 No, no, no, no, come on. They can do this. 366 00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,967 Four fairies, come on. I see it. 367 00:16:08,969 --> 00:16:10,201 I see it right there, huh? 368 00:16:10,203 --> 00:16:13,137 It makes the show. 369 00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:15,506 - Well, I want to be fair to michael and geoffrey, 370 00:16:15,508 --> 00:16:17,275 And the two new fairies, 371 00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:19,677 Well, they're just a little lighter on their feet. 372 00:16:19,679 --> 00:16:21,412 - Well, my boys are very light. 373 00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:26,117 The doors at the aandp don't even open for them. 374 00:16:27,553 --> 00:16:32,557 - But the two new ones are really quite good. 375 00:16:32,559 --> 00:16:36,561 - So is this the school system now, huh? 376 00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:40,098 We--we just settle for "quite good"? 377 00:16:48,574 --> 00:16:51,776 - All right. Guys, you ready? 378 00:16:51,778 --> 00:16:53,011 Both: Yeah. 379 00:16:53,013 --> 00:16:54,379 - Okay. 380 00:16:54,381 --> 00:16:57,782 [classical music playing] 381 00:16:57,784 --> 00:17:00,251 "just as the prince had given up hope 382 00:17:00,253 --> 00:17:02,620 "and thought he was lost in the forest forever, 383 00:17:02,622 --> 00:17:05,056 "he heard a rustling in the trees. 384 00:17:05,058 --> 00:17:08,226 It was the magical fairies." 385 00:17:08,228 --> 00:17:10,294 [boys screaming] 386 00:17:10,296 --> 00:17:12,063 No, no, no, stop it. Stop it. 387 00:17:12,065 --> 00:17:13,064 All right, come here. 388 00:17:13,066 --> 00:17:14,198 No, stop it. Stop it. 389 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,400 Stop bouncing. 390 00:17:15,402 --> 00:17:17,468 Okay, stop it. Guys, stop. 391 00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:19,070 Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. 392 00:17:19,072 --> 00:17:20,471 [screaming stops] 393 00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:23,207 All right, pretty good. 394 00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:25,543 A lot of energy-- good, good energy. 395 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:28,346 Let's take it down a notch, all right? 396 00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:30,415 Okay, you got to remember, fairies, they're-- 397 00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:33,151 They're happy and light, all right? 398 00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:36,220 Not so much "aah!" no, no. 399 00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,688 They're not like that, okay? 400 00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:39,057 So let's try it again. 401 00:17:39,059 --> 00:17:40,525 This time, stay together and just-- 402 00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:43,561 Remember, try to be-- be graceful, okay? 403 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,630 Make believe you're flying, okay? 404 00:17:45,632 --> 00:17:47,298 Happy and light. 405 00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:50,268 All right, right from the top. All right? 406 00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:51,536 Okay, guys, you ready? 407 00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:52,603 Both: Yeah. 408 00:17:54,506 --> 00:17:56,607 - "just as the prince had given up hope 409 00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:58,443 "and thought he was lost in the forest forever, 410 00:17:58,445 --> 00:18:00,311 "he heard a rustling in the trees. 411 00:18:00,313 --> 00:18:02,380 It was the magical fairies." 412 00:18:02,382 --> 00:18:06,150 No, you're not airplanes, guys. 413 00:18:06,152 --> 00:18:09,253 Come on, you're not airplanes. Now cut, cut. 414 00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:11,489 Cut, guys, cut. "cut" means to stop. 415 00:18:11,491 --> 00:18:13,124 Cut--stop. Stop. 416 00:18:26,472 --> 00:18:30,741 [both giggling] 417 00:18:30,743 --> 00:18:33,111 That's not funny, all right? 418 00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:34,545 It's going to be funny when you're up there, 419 00:18:34,547 --> 00:18:36,247 And you're the worst fairies of the play. 420 00:18:36,249 --> 00:18:38,549 Is that going to be funny? 421 00:18:42,154 --> 00:18:45,857 Come on. 422 00:18:45,859 --> 00:18:47,558 I've seen the other fairies, guys. 423 00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:50,294 They put you away, all right? 424 00:18:54,166 --> 00:18:55,399 Now you got to-- 425 00:18:55,401 --> 00:18:57,201 You got to know the moves. 426 00:18:57,203 --> 00:18:59,203 Otherwise, what? I'm not going to tape it. 427 00:18:59,205 --> 00:19:01,372 I'm not going to videotape it if you're... 428 00:19:01,374 --> 00:19:03,875 I want you guys to be the best fairies, all right? 429 00:19:03,877 --> 00:19:05,810 So here's what I want you to do, 430 00:19:05,812 --> 00:19:07,578 'cause you're not going to get by on your looks, all right? 431 00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,280 It's not, "oh, look at the twins with blond hair." 432 00:19:09,282 --> 00:19:12,383 That doesn't cut it anymore, all right? 433 00:19:12,385 --> 00:19:13,718 So listen, instead of-- 434 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,786 Instead of holding your arms out straight, 435 00:19:15,788 --> 00:19:17,588 Try flapping them. 436 00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:18,656 Flap them. Yeah. 437 00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:20,324 Okay, not so hard, though. 438 00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:21,459 Not so hard, though, okay? 439 00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,494 Gentle. Gentle, right? 440 00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:24,529 Yeah. 441 00:19:24,531 --> 00:19:26,797 See? That's it. 442 00:19:26,799 --> 00:19:30,268 This is how you fly. It's how you float. 443 00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:33,237 Feel the air. The air's under your wings. 444 00:19:33,239 --> 00:19:34,672 All right, good. 445 00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:36,674 Now, instead of running, why don't you guys skip? 446 00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,643 Try to skip. Good. 447 00:19:38,645 --> 00:19:40,811 Try to skip. That's good. 448 00:19:40,813 --> 00:19:41,913 Good, but lightly. 449 00:19:41,915 --> 00:19:44,682 Lightly, like, you know, glide. 450 00:19:44,684 --> 00:19:47,518 Glide, glide. 451 00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,187 Good. All right. 452 00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:50,454 Now let's try it on our toes, on our-- 453 00:19:50,456 --> 00:19:52,890 Our tippy toes, the tippy toes. 454 00:19:52,892 --> 00:19:54,258 Yeah, that's it. 455 00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:55,493 Feel it. You're flying. 456 00:19:55,495 --> 00:19:56,794 Yeah, you're flying. 457 00:19:56,796 --> 00:19:58,329 Look, I'm flying. I'm flying. 458 00:19:58,331 --> 00:20:00,198 I'm flying. I'm flying. 459 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,266 I'm flying. I'm-- 460 00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:13,744 - Holy crap. 461 00:20:25,958 --> 00:20:28,593 Marie, I hope you're happy! 462 00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:38,703 - All right, guys, no pressure, okay? 463 00:20:38,705 --> 00:20:39,804 Don't be nervous. 464 00:20:39,806 --> 00:20:41,305 Michael, where's your wand? 465 00:20:41,307 --> 00:20:42,440 Michael, what'd you do with your wand? 466 00:20:42,442 --> 00:20:43,741 - You have it, daddy. 467 00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:47,011 - Oh, oh, right, right. Okay, here. 468 00:20:47,013 --> 00:20:48,746 - Rawr! 469 00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:54,719 - Hey, do you mind? We're on in a minute here. 470 00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:57,488 - Mr. Barone, uh, wouldn't you be more comfortable 471 00:20:57,490 --> 00:20:59,657 Sitting out in the audience with the rest of the parents? 472 00:20:59,659 --> 00:21:01,659 - No, you know what? I'm good--I'm good right here. 473 00:21:01,661 --> 00:21:03,594 - Okay. Well, let's go, everybody. 474 00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:04,795 Okay, good luck, boys. 475 00:21:04,797 --> 00:21:06,264 - All right, guys. This is it. 476 00:21:06,266 --> 00:21:08,733 You're on, okay? Come on, places now. 477 00:21:08,735 --> 00:21:11,636 Hey, now, don't forget the twirly finish. 478 00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:12,637 - Curtain up. 479 00:21:12,639 --> 00:21:14,639 [applause] 480 00:21:14,641 --> 00:21:16,941 Once upon a time, 481 00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:19,343 There was a prince who was lost in the forest. 482 00:21:19,345 --> 00:21:21,545 Just as the prince had given up hope 483 00:21:21,547 --> 00:21:23,648 And thought he was lost in the forest forever, 484 00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:25,850 He heard a rustling in the trees. 485 00:21:25,852 --> 00:21:29,587 It was the magical fairies. 486 00:21:29,589 --> 00:21:35,593 [geoffrey and michael screaming] 487 00:21:47,706 --> 00:21:49,006 - Oh!